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Mils Muliaina Reflects on INCREDIBLE All Blacks Career, Wrongful Arrest, Life After Rugby

July 08, 202301:30:15
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okay Runners only with dime Harley
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Runners only with dom Harvey and one of
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my favorite All Blacks of all time and
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definitely without a doubt my favorite
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mortgage broker of all time Mills
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miliano hello g'day thank you hey mate
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thank you so much for coming over thanks
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for coming on the podcast
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um I I need to start by preempting
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something I did um you were supposed to
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come on a couple of weeks ago and then
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there was a last minute family emergency
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um and you had to postpone somewhere in
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between then and now I've lost my notes
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and I only realized like about an hour
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ago so I'm going in nude no notes you
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thought I wasn't going to come back yeah
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you were like no he's just using one of
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those excuses I'll check these out
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there's no way he's coming back no I did
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a lot of research but I'm not sure where
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it's going so I've got some of it
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committed to memory but um I I'm I
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actually feel okay with that because I
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know you're a good conversationalist and
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it's great to have you here
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um
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first of all I want to say how this how
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this came about
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um you you were not even on my on my
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radar and I was driving along I think I
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had News Talk ZB playing and uh an ad
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came on voiced by you as a mortgage
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broker and I thought um Melissa be a
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great guest so I Googled you and there
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you were how did you get into being a
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mortgage broker crazy yep um I mean when
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I sort of initially came back from from
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finishing up playing rugby wasn't the
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ideal plan well it wasn't really the
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plan I wanted just to come back and
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um sort of phase out of the whole sort
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of rugby scene and quietly ago about
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owning my own business and Chiropractic
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and that's what I came back to stated in
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my first year at aut in 2017
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um just my prereqs
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um but sort of fast forward to different
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things kind of happened um and I've
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always had an interest in um in
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purchasing houses I had a portfolio when
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I was playing rugby don't know how I got
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on there but I managed to buy my first
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house at the age of 20. um and then sort
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of along the way sort of built built
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that throughout my career and then sort
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of helped a number of my sort of peers
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into it um
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came back had did a couple of shows was
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for Sky Scotty Stevenson sort of asked
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me to come on and I was like nah that's
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media is not really we wanted to get to
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um he sort of initiated that
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conversation while I was still playing
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at the Chiefs and other certain there's
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no way I want to get into that and um
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but I did it as a sort of a favor went
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on for three shows for Skye
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um
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and it just never stopped so fast
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forward
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um you know actually was during that
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time
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um my my good mate from school Vinnie
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mcliffe is my business partner he wanted
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to leave the banking space so he's been
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in banking 20 odd years managed a few
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Banks csb benzed and he said to me look
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um would you be keen on
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doing it and I was like well yeah man we
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feel ready because obviously you have to
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take the leap and
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um you know we have to get cracking into
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it once you give once you give um your
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origination and you're obviously Beyond
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gardening level we did it he handed in
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his notice and they kept him off for
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another six weeks which was crazy
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um and this is where I've got to today
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and so that that ad that uh you've you
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heard it's been a real big part because
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it's not something that I've been really
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comfortable about as sort of the public
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face that's the marketing side of it you
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know but
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um and Joe who's my my wife she's been
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pushing along with Vinnie um that we've
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got to Branch out a bit more but
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um we've had so much success you know I
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suppose
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um yeah I'm I'm probably a little bit
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comfortable in terms of sort of what
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we're what we're doing and how that's
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come about and that's probably how I've
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ended up here mate if it wasn't for that
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you probably wouldn't have reached out
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it was bigger on the radar so it's a
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good thing well I I appreciate it
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because it's you're such an interesting
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guy and you know the one of um we talked
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just before the podcast started one of
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only I think nine or ten people that
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have played like 100 all black tests
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yeah
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um so it's good to get you get your
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story at the end I'm pleased that you're
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thriving in life yeah it's really cool
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where did where did the money smarts
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come from
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when did you get your first professional
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rugby contract like 17 18. yeah I was so
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I I was 18 I think I played New Zealand
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Sevens at 19. I actually played for
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Samoa before that and the sevens
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um part but I played New Zealand Sevens
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um had no idea about money um my back
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well I've got six brothers and one
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sister
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um my parents broke up at an early age
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um you know while I was down this I
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never knew anything about money we lived
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in social housing rented majority of Our
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Lives
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um once I got my first real contract I
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kind of just spent it on anything and
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everything you remember how much it was
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I can't actually remember um I think it
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was uh for sevens it was like every
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tournament that you went on you got like
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two thousand dollars
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uh and then from there on
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um it was a thousand dollars if you
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missed the tournament but my first sort
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of Academy contract was two thousand
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dollars so I was at school I came up
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from invercargill obviously and did my
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last year of school at Charleston and um
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the following year Auckland rugby will
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offered me an academy contract with two
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thousand dollars and at the same time uh
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South and Rugby Union offered me a ten
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thousand dollar contract and I thought
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man it's awesome I'm playing PC the
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following year I'm still at school and
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ten thousand dollars is massive it's
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kind of like winning the lotto and yeah
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you know but yeah in the scheme of
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things it wasn't wasn't that much money
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at all I mean I would have blown some of
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my conscious I probably would have blown
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that in two weeks you know and give them
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the party I suppose when you're that age
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you think all you can think is like I
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can get a car I can get a car or I can
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get whatever yep to team buy Mama house
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for ten thousand dollars I wouldn't have
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been about afford anything really so
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um the 18 18 19 ish I had a relatively
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sort of um Semi-Pro uh contract and then
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it's just funny looking back now because
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I feel so old because some of that stuff
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I can't even remember it's just how old
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are you now I'm Matt I'll be 43 next in
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July so I'm probably good yeah trying to
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it's always harder these days but um
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it's crazy looking back at how fast sort
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of things
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um evolved and then playing professional
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rugby I often just
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um just wonder how I ended up doing it
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because it was just kind of what do you
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mean
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oh I think when you're when you're kind
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of in it and things happen in the
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pressures of the world and the pressures
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of playing rugby
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um you don't realize how fast time flies
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until you get to the the end of your
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sort of
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the end of your career but the end of
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your or the life cycle here in New
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Zealand right you kind of think far out
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um
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I'm not even that old I'm you know 30
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almost 30 years old and I'm kind of like
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man there's still a whole life time
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ahead and that's probably when I started
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thinking about
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uh what life after I've been the big
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priority what was it a big thing for me
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since that priority was that I didn't
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really want to be living in the whole
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bubble anymore like I had enough of that
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I had enough of
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you know been walking down the show I
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was happy to be able to be anonymous
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yeah and just do my own thing and just
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sort of and that's probably part of the
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reason why I wasn't big on advertising
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and marketing because you know I felt
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that you know I could you know um easy
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just sort of do my own thing and be and
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be happy with that as long as I knew
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what I was kind of kind of getting up to
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and doing
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wow so it's a nose sort of no sort of
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Desire or ego to be in the public eye
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really no which is crazy now it
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it's a remarkable career and everyone
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loves you
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um so I mean it would you know it would
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be understandable and make sense to like
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cash in on that great name that you've
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built yeah I just it's not your thing
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was it was never it wasn't my thing I
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think I didn't know I mean we just
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exhausted from it being your thing for
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so many years I didn't really want to be
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it wasn't a thing where I thought man I
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still want that I still want that
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identity yeah having people sort of know
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who I was
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I've seen that guy somewhere was it a
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was it an ad or was it a TV show no I
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was happy with that you know rather than
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sort of
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um like you have been with with the
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rugby days where everything's about
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rugby and um and what you sort of what
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you sort of done on on the field and
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more
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um particular sort of off the field too
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so but it's just um I love it I I love
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what I'm doing now
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um you know I I loving the work that I
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do I'm loving being in um a broadcaster
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if that's what you want to want to call
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it
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um really enjoying that side of
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um that side of life and sort of the
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opportunities that have I suppose come
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from the stuff that I didn't really want
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which is um which has been fantastic
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yeah it's kind of cool because so you
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you had a definite plan of what you
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wanted to do and then this other stuff
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just sort of popped up and uh you you
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were able to Pivot which I think is
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really cool I think it's important to
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have a plan rather than just like you
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know Bob along hoping someone is going
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to come up but it's yeah it's like
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everything's worked out good for you
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yeah 100 I think um then often
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guys fall into that trip yeah you know
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they they I mean the only young he might
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mentioned 30 31 and before you know it
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you're you're out in the big world and
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it is the it is actually the big world
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you kind of like you know scrambling to
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trying to you know the last thing you
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want to be doing scrambling trying to
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find your feet and understand who you
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are and what what you want to do
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um hence the reason I knew you know it
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wasn't I wasn't going to be on the same
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pay picket but I'd put some aside to
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know that okay well here's the next four
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what the next four years may look like
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um but still had that sort of
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vulnerability to set one four years time
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that their business might not be what it
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is yeah
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um because in some ways it's I know it
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sounds
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weird but I still have that in me that
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that whole um feeling of vulnerability
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and being like man it's almost like a
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goal I've got to get to there got to get
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oh no we're not quite get in there it's
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the same thing with business not meeting
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your targets or
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um staff doing what we you're asking
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them to do or um things like so a lot of
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the rugby rugby skills that I've learned
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is um has been is transitioned into the
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this this real you know the real life in
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the real world and what that sort of
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looks like and it's been it's been
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amazing in fact I I I'd say I've learned
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a lot from rugby that people in in the
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business since probably haven't quite
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learned yet
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um which I mean I'm really grateful
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about can I just say like I'm just I'm
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blown away like we're 10 minutes into
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this chat like um
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I I always remember you through your
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playing career when I'd come to like
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your press conferences and things at the
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Heritage Hotel or you'd come and come to
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our radio show like you were you were
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always like articulate and well spoken
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but you were kind of shy yeah um now
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you're so chatty is that just through
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majority
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definitely I've made time I've matured
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so much from the guy that
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um was pretty reserved and just
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answered the you know the the questions
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sort of
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um I suppose cliches or cliches and you
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kind of think far if I had my time I'd
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love to do that all over again you know
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being where I am now because
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you often get caught in the fact that
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you are in such a bubble being you know
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an all black and you don't want to say
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the wrong things because it might get
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taken out of contents which it does
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but um I think
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being exposed to that now I'd be exposed
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to public speaking and being exposed to
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being on TV
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um it's definitely helped your
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confidence it's not
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um it's crazy because
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um you don't learn that stuff it's not
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something you can go man I'm gonna well
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you can't get a broadcast casting school
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but I've had to learn along the way and
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that's really built my confidence and
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also understanding
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okay well I'm I've got to be good at the
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stuff that I'm providing if that's
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Financial advice you know when you're
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qualified uh financial advisor you've
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got to be comfortable that you know and
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understand that same with Rigby but I
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understand what I'm doing with the team
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stuff that I'm doing I'm not going to be
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able to
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um do my part for the team or my part
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for my clients if I'm sort of not doing
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my homework or not doing my analysis as
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they would call it but uh
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it's definitely
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um I'm a lot more chattier than than I
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used to yeah and it's really cool yeah
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it's cool I like it I like it good for
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you yeah um let's go right back to the
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beginning so where were you born so I
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was born yeah and you moved to why the
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[ __ ] did you move to Southland it's
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crazy I know everyone always asks me
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that and like to be honest when
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sometimes we know I speak when I first
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came up they were like man some of them
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obviously I've got a lot of winter
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Charleston boys and a lot of Polynesians
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out there they used to think I spoke
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funny
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um it wasn't until I realized later what
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they are sort of talking to even people
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now saying you know I'm trying to speak
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like a European but it's absolutely the
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way I'm being brought up
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um my parents came over on a ballot uh
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when I was three years old there was
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only myself my two other siblings at the
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time
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um and obviously you've got to get
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sponsored and then you know work was was
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needed you needed um you know occupation
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mum's family were down in the cargo
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their own forestry
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freezing Works was massive obviously the
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oysters so that was where they ended we
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ended up and a bit of support around
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obviously mother's family being down
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there and yeah they never left I mean
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mum's mum's still down there my majority
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of my siblings love it down there we go
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down there all the time because
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um my kids are similar ages to my
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brothers kids so it's a wonderful place
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but it also has its challenges and that
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was part of the reason why I ended up
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leaving
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what challenges like the club are you
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doing climate wise or well yeah it was
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but um crossing the road because the
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roads are so wide aren't they we only
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just came back on the weekend
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um on Friday and
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um Raji who's works for us he's like man
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these roses are so awake you put two
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motorways on there yeah
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um but I I think I just got too big for
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my own shoes I think
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um
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you know I was obviously
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um you know pretty good at rugby I came
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through the grades and then when my
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parents split out mum was a solo mother
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um probably didn't get a real big handle
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on I suppose we've held you in the
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broker nine
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um and then I suppose just
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scared of parties and sneaking out and
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getting myself into trouble I ended up
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um
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um fighting a lot I don't know one
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because I'm not a fighter at all I'm the
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guy in the back that sort of waits for
00:14:27
everyone else what was it was it just
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like um like like the the booze or was
00:14:31
it or was it just like um like Teenage
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rage yeah I think just just your teenage
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stuff going out and partying first 15
00:14:37
parties and then ended up ending up at
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McDonald's at the end of the night and
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you know and then just stuff starting
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and then giving him amongst it so I got
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um I went to court for assault and got
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discharged without conviction
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um did you like when you were still at
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school I was still at school so I was in
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sixth form
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um
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and that was probably the big uh turning
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point for me because I went from there I
00:15:01
was in sixth form I always remember
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being picked up from um
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an audio because I was I was actually I
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was going to court and the police turned
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up
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um at home took me in obviously after
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the weekend and my man had no idea so I
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still remember this day having to
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explain to it was kind of happening
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going to court
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um getting community service for it
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which was but it was an eye-opener I
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made I made the South and sevens the
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men's Squad at that time
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um
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and then basically you know
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I wouldn't say I got myself myself
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together I still had that sort of pardon
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me because I was so young and yeah you
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know getting to that age and your mother
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not being able to sort of really control
00:15:45
the sort of teenage boys
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um and then it wasn't until I made I
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made a New Zealand New Zealand touch
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team
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and I came up in January uh in
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1998 and um
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my brother had come out the year before
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to go to custom boys he really loved it
00:16:03
um and he thought I should come up to
00:16:05
get away from things and I decided I was
00:16:08
going to oh yeah there's whale there's
00:16:09
trouble in Auckland yeah weightless I
00:16:11
know he's waiting his way bigger boys up
00:16:13
here too mate so I wouldn't have ever
00:16:15
been that confident
00:16:17
um and and um came up the family friend
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that I stayed with met the Solomons
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um I plan on actually coming up in
00:16:23
January then going back home and then
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pleading to my mother not to let me go
00:16:26
yeah
00:16:27
um but he said you're not going home and
00:16:29
it was just kind of like holy [ __ ] I was
00:16:32
just I probably cried in my room
00:16:35
um
00:16:36
every every day before school because I
00:16:38
was just going to the school
00:16:40
I didn't know about it in fact before
00:16:41
school even started I had to finish off
00:16:43
my community service hours at Council
00:16:45
which is where I met my business partner
00:16:47
I mean obviously just mates with uh with
00:16:49
my my big brother but I was cleaning
00:16:51
windows taking the rubbish
00:16:52
um hope helping you know mow the first
00:16:54
15
00:16:56
um field number one pitch but I was I
00:16:59
was really scared I didn't know what I
00:17:01
was
00:17:02
um what I was getting my what I was
00:17:03
getting into I'd sort of lift the
00:17:05
Comforts of being with my mates in there
00:17:07
and that's where everything else flemed
00:17:09
into it and it's the reason why that ten
00:17:11
thousand dollars at South and offered me
00:17:12
at the end of that year
00:17:14
was so important because I was thinking
00:17:15
man I hated it up here so hated it I
00:17:18
wanted to go home I've got ten thousand
00:17:19
dollars now that I've been offered
00:17:20
Auckland only offered me two thousand I
00:17:23
was like man it doesn't you know it's an
00:17:25
obvious choice of where to go
00:17:27
um
00:17:28
but again I had to have hard
00:17:30
conversations again with my mum and also
00:17:32
my brother about
00:17:33
where I'd end up and I chose Auckland or
00:17:36
with a push from them and um
00:17:39
I never looked back it was just crazy
00:17:41
and it's kind of been there
00:17:43
um
00:17:44
in my whole kind of
00:17:46
um I suppose career I've always sort of
00:17:49
fallen off the wagon a little bit or I'm
00:17:51
gonna say wagon falling off the path
00:17:52
jump myself back on falling off again
00:17:54
head face adversity
00:17:57
um been real strong about that
00:18:00
um and then also sort of come back and
00:18:02
just so whilst it's sort of falling into
00:18:04
place there's been a lot of
00:18:06
um hard stuff that's happening along the
00:18:08
way which is I suppose made me who I am
00:18:10
today yeah yeah you have been through
00:18:12
some stuff um yeah I mean we can get
00:18:15
into this later on as much or as little
00:18:16
as you want to but
00:18:18
um
00:18:19
yes so so um so you're in Auckland you
00:18:22
got the two thousand dollars then when
00:18:23
do you like
00:18:25
because I mean you go to school like
00:18:26
kelston there's a there's a lot of good
00:18:28
rugby players here right amen so we were
00:18:30
you just like naturally good we bigger
00:18:32
than most no you went bigger than most
00:18:33
it wasn't big at all you know I still
00:18:35
remember my first game and I was
00:18:36
thinking
00:18:37
some of these guys have got beards and
00:18:40
you're thinking uh there's no what about
00:18:42
me I know man I'm like far out man I how
00:18:46
am I going to survive this I was I was
00:18:47
fortunate enough I had a bit of speed so
00:18:49
I think that really helped I was on the
00:18:51
wing
00:18:52
um so I got myself used to we had a
00:18:54
dominant team like our team was so good
00:18:57
um and then I think all but two guys
00:18:59
from our team became professional rugby
00:19:02
players
00:19:03
um who were some of your teammates
00:19:05
um
00:19:09
um
00:19:13
who else was there that would uh
00:19:15
[ __ ] it's a stack team there's a lot of
00:19:17
this yeah there was a lot man by the top
00:19:19
of my head now um but still guys that I
00:19:21
still get on to I mean they were they
00:19:22
played professional rugby in some way
00:19:25
um you know whether it's an NPC or
00:19:27
overseas as well so
00:19:30
um yeah we had a really talented team
00:19:32
and I kind of just fell into that and
00:19:33
just found my found my groove really
00:19:35
made New Zealand schools
00:19:37
um and being under 19s and 21s and sort
00:19:40
of came through and those were the teams
00:19:41
that I wasn't really making from South
00:19:43
Island because I suppose I wasn't really
00:19:45
exposed to the big boys would come up
00:19:47
and would play them you were like
00:19:49
these guys are big and that's probably
00:19:50
half the reason why you lost yeah you
00:19:52
lost before you even got on to the
00:19:54
picture oh like the mental battle just
00:19:56
intimidation that's it yeah man there's
00:19:57
no one want to tackle these guys so
00:20:01
um yeah that was that was the majority
00:20:03
of the the battle really whereas things
00:20:05
that now they're just they're so similar
00:20:07
now which is helps a lot of guys yeah I
00:20:09
mean when did you first make the All
00:20:10
Blacks who was your coach back then was
00:20:11
it um it was uh Mitch Mitchell uh John
00:20:14
Mitchell in uh Robbie Dean's did you
00:20:19
no no so even like this is everyone
00:20:21
thinks that I didn't I played against
00:20:23
him
00:20:24
um and I'll most often get tagged on the
00:20:27
guy that sort of took over from Kelly
00:20:28
but I wasn't I man I pure luck
00:20:32
um
00:20:33
it was Leon McDonald really and he
00:20:35
became injured in fact I always wondered
00:20:37
I sort of slid across and need him in
00:20:39
the head and got him concussed
00:20:41
um and the and one of the I think it
00:20:43
might have been the final of the or one
00:20:44
of the games during the Super
00:20:46
2003 Super Rugby championship and then
00:20:51
obviously they tried Dougie there the
00:20:53
first game that we lost against England
00:20:54
and then I've got my shot in
00:20:59
um I just I went I played 31 in a row 31
00:21:02
games in a row and it was kind of like
00:21:03
Father this is crazy so I kind of got my
00:21:06
opportunity off there but often you take
00:21:07
the quite a bit that sort of took uh
00:21:10
Kelly's spot when the natural Factor was
00:21:13
not me at all yeah wow so yeah so John
00:21:17
Mitchell um so he's your first coach and
00:21:19
then it was an early in your all black
00:21:21
career I'd forgotten all about this and
00:21:23
I think most people would have so we we
00:21:24
don't even have to go there if you want
00:21:26
but you got in some trouble early on
00:21:27
like there was um you're gonna fight
00:21:29
somewhere and then like public urination
00:21:31
so this is before social media yeah I'm
00:21:33
guessing it was like Myspace or bibo
00:21:35
yeah yeah but no sort of camera phones
00:21:37
so how did that happen was it a big deal
00:21:40
at the time again I'd forgotten all
00:21:41
about it man it's crazy eh because again
00:21:45
when I mentioned the fact that there's
00:21:47
been some challenges along the way but
00:21:48
let's just you know I look back at an
00:21:50
incident in you know well you know
00:21:52
discharged with that conviction that's
00:21:54
still party life from invercargill where
00:21:57
you sort of you know pitch in the year
00:21:58
and had
00:22:00
10 or 20 bucks each and go buy and kick
00:22:02
and just get absolutely mother to store
00:22:03
kind of in me even though I didn't have
00:22:05
10 or 20 bucks
00:22:07
um you know I'd often just like try and
00:22:08
scrounge off my mates yeah
00:22:10
um I'm a little bit older than you but
00:22:12
yeah the keg party thank you your mate's
00:22:14
chipping it every Friday
00:22:15
though I mean if you're five years maybe
00:22:17
I think it's 100 bucks or 90 bucks or
00:22:19
something yeah get a key and you just
00:22:21
sit there and just get absolutely
00:22:23
trolley I mean that was that was the
00:22:25
mentality yeah it was in the garage it
00:22:27
was and um part of that was still on me
00:22:29
but now I've got a whole heap of money
00:22:34
Taco red one not even that man it's all
00:22:37
free you know because you know you walk
00:22:39
in after an aftermatch it's all put on
00:22:41
the year there's a bar that's allocated
00:22:43
you walk in the sponsors products are
00:22:45
all there there's a bar tear Bond so
00:22:47
yeah
00:22:49
before you know it I mean you're just
00:22:51
you're not even spending your own money
00:22:52
but you're just getting mother too so
00:22:54
hero here I was now coming from a
00:22:56
Lifeline there and still a huge huge
00:22:59
part of me I was partying every weekend
00:23:01
and when I seen about my money that was
00:23:02
just that was going to even though
00:23:04
things were free yeah
00:23:06
um
00:23:07
and yeah I got back from the
00:23:09
Commonwealth Games I was just after just
00:23:12
after my 21st birthday highly
00:23:15
intoxicated it's now what's crazy about
00:23:17
this storm is I was sitting in The
00:23:18
Barbers and no word of a lie and my wife
00:23:21
was in there and I was getting like
00:23:22
haircuts with the kids and there's a guy
00:23:24
listening he goes okay those guys it
00:23:26
would have been about a couple of months
00:23:27
ago now
00:23:28
and you see every now and then like oh
00:23:30
yes but then I know who it is and it's
00:23:32
Hi and then he mentioned hey do you
00:23:33
remember me my wife wasn't even around
00:23:35
then I said who are you and he was like
00:23:37
I'm the guy that um helped you out of
00:23:39
the bow and you when you pissed in it
00:23:41
and I was like mate I'm 49 20 yard years
00:23:44
ago and here's a guy here that's just
00:23:46
like I am he's the guy that sort of
00:23:49
um sort of kicked me out I I said did
00:23:52
you piss in the bar yeah I pissed at the
00:23:54
bar so
00:23:57
but when I I looked back and I remember
00:23:59
you know
00:24:00
um I got a call from the manager and I
00:24:02
was like okay okay so when I was a
00:24:03
nobody then really I was like so I was
00:24:06
thinking okay man this there's no way
00:24:07
this is going to come out you know
00:24:08
hopefully I would have might have dodged
00:24:10
the bullet
00:24:12
um brought the NZ Herald and obviously
00:24:14
it's folded in half and was looking at
00:24:15
that oh Nick he's not there going
00:24:17
through going through it or not I was
00:24:18
like [ __ ] I've missed it and then as
00:24:19
I've closed it and then flipped it over
00:24:21
it's on the front page and here's my
00:24:23
face oh so you went straight to the
00:24:24
sports page yeah I was thinking oh [ __ ]
00:24:26
and um
00:24:28
night it was
00:24:30
that was massive because I sort of got
00:24:33
to the part where I'm kind of like hey
00:24:34
I'm like one I was more embarrassed in
00:24:38
in um for my family and especially my
00:24:40
mother uh this was now going to be in
00:24:42
months um you know she's got a massive
00:24:46
um support group down there in terms of
00:24:48
the church and the Memphis church and
00:24:51
all the the old and the old ladies that
00:24:53
we've been talking to her about it and
00:24:55
so it's more kind of that I was still
00:24:56
really young I still 20 I probably
00:24:59
um
00:25:01
yeah they hurt really bad nothing was
00:25:02
like thinking far out you know um just
00:25:05
the girls in shame of letting your
00:25:06
family yeah more than anything else you
00:25:08
know because I still wouldn't my mind I
00:25:10
saw this one is 21ish and I was like
00:25:12
okay cool I've got a I've got to give up
00:25:14
alcohol
00:25:15
um and actually put some uh puts put
00:25:18
some processes and well I hate to use
00:25:20
the word process but put some things in
00:25:23
place so that I don't get
00:25:24
mullered yeah or don't get to that sort
00:25:27
of stage which is did you reach that
00:25:29
decision yourself or were you sort of
00:25:31
sit down with a leadership group no
00:25:32
there wasn't really a leadership group
00:25:33
then as well there's sort of leaders but
00:25:36
I was still relatively pretty young and
00:25:38
I just thought man I've I don't want to
00:25:40
do this again I was more around the
00:25:41
driven about Notting your family down
00:25:43
yeah yeah yeah more than anything else
00:25:45
and then
00:25:47
um and I actually I met uh Leo Malloy
00:25:50
maybe about it would have been about
00:25:52
similar time to win this this is crazy
00:25:54
and he I think he actually owned the bar
00:25:56
he said to me oh I didn't even um he
00:25:58
said that he don't you know about him
00:26:00
many years ago and that was sort of how
00:26:02
he remembered me I was like okay so
00:26:04
that's the last time you remember
00:26:07
um it's yeah it's crazy and I suppose I
00:26:10
started putting things into place to
00:26:12
goals that I really wanted to achieve
00:26:13
from there in part that didn't involve
00:26:16
alcohol just
00:26:17
it gave me a sense to actually
00:26:21
um
00:26:21
have something to to strive for and and
00:26:25
be successful on the on the field and
00:26:27
every Hall you know I think for the very
00:26:29
first time that was probably the very
00:26:30
first time I actually backed myself and
00:26:31
thought man I'll make you a good player
00:26:32
because one I'm on the on the front page
00:26:34
so I didn't think I would be and two I
00:26:38
wanted to show people that others are
00:26:39
good yeah rugby player yeah
00:26:41
I think like what you did beyond that I
00:26:43
mean you know come on 100 tests like you
00:26:45
I mean yeah it's remarkable it feels
00:26:48
like you you set a plan or you set some
00:26:50
goals and you you [ __ ] smash them
00:26:52
mate yeah yeah I did you did you did
00:26:53
really well that was a it was a Flawless
00:26:55
and off the field after that like a
00:26:58
Flawless career yeah uh and as I said I
00:27:01
mean a lot was that was driven by this
00:27:04
the things that you relate to now just
00:27:06
having goals not getting don't go out at
00:27:08
night you know I mean the altercation
00:27:09
when I got you know after the final and
00:27:12
just getting you know dragged out of um
00:27:14
taxi from that and then and and then
00:27:17
having a broken eye socket well yes what
00:27:19
was that one that was 2020 that was 2003
00:27:22
so 2003 so after what final the like
00:27:24
Super Rugby final and so what happened
00:27:29
or whatever it was and um
00:27:31
I was in a box or obviously getting hit
00:27:33
a little bit of tongue-in-cheek to some
00:27:35
of them and
00:27:37
um one of our
00:27:38
um teammates got kicked out so I
00:27:40
followed him out and I sort of got
00:27:41
tongue and cheek at the same time highly
00:27:43
intoxicated jumped in the cab and I got
00:27:45
dragged down the tig and sort of just
00:27:47
dealt to really but it was funny because
00:27:49
it was just well not funny but it was
00:27:51
just crazy because I've gone throughout
00:27:53
this whole period of
00:27:55
um goals and everything and I've got to
00:27:57
that point I'm like just pissed in the
00:27:58
bar the year before I want to eat myself
00:28:00
make sure that I'd get off the piss and
00:28:03
really focus on rapist that did won the
00:28:05
final the following year had been on it
00:28:07
and the first time that I did it this
00:28:09
way everything it wasn't even my [ __ ]
00:28:11
fault yeah
00:28:12
um and then the next day the All Blacks
00:28:14
team was going to be named this is why
00:28:16
it was crazy because I had such a good
00:28:19
season and I didn't really think I was
00:28:21
going to be named and every time I get
00:28:22
asked I know where were you where you
00:28:24
got you know named in the in the uh and
00:28:26
the All Blacks I honestly thought that
00:28:28
they weren't going to pick me because
00:28:29
why did you why did you think that
00:28:31
or urinated in the bath okay because of
00:28:35
the okay yeah get stuck into this you
00:28:38
know they all said we're we're well to
00:28:40
be honest I was you know at home with an
00:28:41
ice pick over my broken eye socket
00:28:43
waiting for my name
00:28:46
so it wasn't so awesome memory it's
00:28:48
still one that that often sort of mixed
00:28:51
emotions exactly but it was man loved
00:28:54
the fact that Mitch and Robbie sort of
00:28:57
had faith in picking me even though you
00:28:59
know
00:28:59
um you know they had the understanding
00:29:01
of what obviously happened
00:29:03
but it almost took that one moment to
00:29:06
not even be selected as an all black and
00:29:08
I'd hate I don't know where what I mean
00:29:10
I still reckon I'd still get back onto
00:29:13
the path and be more motivated to do
00:29:15
anything else but I still sort of really
00:29:17
grateful and thankful that it didn't
00:29:19
eventuate today it wouldn't be where I
00:29:21
am obviously today I feel like it'd be
00:29:23
very different now like I feel like it's
00:29:25
way less tolerance now I like no no sort
00:29:28
of Second Chances so um so the eye
00:29:30
socket thing is that the Line in the
00:29:32
Sand were you like right there it said
00:29:33
I'm not [ __ ] up again why yeah I
00:29:35
didn't I didn't want to there's a Rugby
00:29:37
World Cup yeah I've Loved I mean it's
00:29:39
almost like I just when I got that
00:29:41
opportunity that I mentioned before
00:29:42
about after
00:29:44
um they tested they get a full back I
00:29:46
was like [ __ ] I just absolutely loved it
00:29:48
I didn't really want to
00:29:50
you know they say in the All Blacks so
00:29:52
hard
00:29:53
um to be
00:29:55
um not selected to get into it then I've
00:29:57
obviously be dropped and but I just I it
00:30:00
was everything I I ever dreamed of I
00:30:03
never thought that that's what it felt
00:30:05
like to constantly being picked every
00:30:07
week go out there and play and I really
00:30:08
enjoyed my Rugby it wasn't so much okay
00:30:10
all these things that had happened you
00:30:12
know um I don't want to go down there
00:30:14
again I just loved being an all black I
00:30:16
absolutely love the fact and I
00:30:17
admittedly I didn't think I'd ever would
00:30:19
be Kevin all black it's probably on the
00:30:21
back end of that but I just thought
00:30:23
when you man when you're a with someone
00:30:26
someone get out from south end and every
00:30:28
other it's you just aspire to these
00:30:31
Heroes that you see on TV and you know
00:30:32
Michael Jones of the world and it's real
00:30:34
even dirty the Ronnie Clark cell or in
00:30:37
Auckland and you don't really get to
00:30:39
touch them really and yeah to them play
00:30:41
with them in the in the Auckland sides
00:30:44
and then become this all black yeah just
00:30:46
thinking you pinch yourself because
00:30:48
you've kind of like
00:30:49
this this wasn't supposed to happen you
00:30:52
know it was it was literally a dream to
00:30:54
be an all black but you're in it you
00:30:56
love it so much
00:30:58
um I didn't I didn't want it to end yeah
00:31:00
well and you did pretty well too yeah
00:31:02
yeah
00:31:04
I did I didn't I did I literally did
00:31:07
hang on to right down to the very last
00:31:10
moment which is why I ended up and down
00:31:12
to a chiropractor and getting him to fix
00:31:14
me up yeah yeah
00:31:16
yeah so so who was it was new did your
00:31:20
career overlay with China
00:31:22
no I played sevens of with the big man
00:31:26
um I played against them I still
00:31:28
remember sort of marking them a couple
00:31:30
of times when I've played wing for
00:31:31
Auckland and also for the blues so
00:31:34
um I was more there
00:31:36
um you know the Reuben Thorns was the
00:31:38
the all-black Captain
00:31:40
um a lot of Canterbury guys were around
00:31:42
and in fact there's a lot of Canterbury
00:31:43
in Crusader guys still right
00:31:46
um
00:31:47
yeah so now there's a few of us still
00:31:49
this Carlos Spencer's yeah
00:31:52
um of the world and um obviously Dougie
00:31:54
Hallett who I've mentioned before yeah
00:31:55
yes didn't you um were you enjoying it
00:31:58
quite time you were sitting next time at
00:32:00
uh Jerry Collins Funeral yeah so when I
00:32:03
played my seventh in 2000 the first
00:32:05
sevens in in Wellington that's when I've
00:32:08
really got to meet Jonah for the first
00:32:09
time man I was crazy because this was
00:32:11
kind of like did he buy you a cat
00:32:13
apparently he met people and bought them
00:32:14
cars they'd buy us a car but I often
00:32:17
told the story about because you know
00:32:18
when you're in teachers environment you
00:32:20
can't touch any of the fatty foods and
00:32:22
stuff I just finished the first day of
00:32:24
the tournament John was like to me and
00:32:26
the massiel valance came in we'll go for
00:32:28
a ride go for a feed and we're like oh
00:32:29
yeah Sweden because we're going to KFC
00:32:30
we're like oh you ain't gonna say no
00:32:32
right and
00:32:34
um man it hit us because we lost the
00:32:36
final the next day against
00:32:38
um Fiji but you weren't going to say no
00:32:40
and I I literally wouldn't put it down
00:32:42
to the fact that he took us to KFC and
00:32:44
ate the fatty foods uh I know you're
00:32:47
right I love KFC but who doesn't yeah
00:32:49
but um I'll put it down down to that but
00:32:51
who would who would say nato jono and
00:32:53
he's offering to take you to take you to
00:32:55
KFC in that big boom box of a car thing
00:32:58
that's really the world record the world
00:33:00
record for the loudest cars such a cool
00:33:02
car man crazy crazy guy hey I'm I'm so
00:33:06
glad that he um he he you know passed
00:33:08
away because it'd be just the ultimate
00:33:10
podcast guest like um yeah I'm quite
00:33:13
good friends with um Kelly and uh yeah
00:33:15
the the their careers overlapped quite a
00:33:18
lot and
00:33:18
they'd go to a new town or then they'd
00:33:21
go to like a trick store and they'd buy
00:33:23
like a Boombox for the bus and he was
00:33:25
just like ridic insanely generous so
00:33:28
yeah when he passed away and he fed up
00:33:30
that he wasn't financially
00:33:31
um uh secure like it makes perfect sense
00:33:34
yeah a lot of money he did um
00:33:37
yeah and sad too and I suppose being um
00:33:40
being who he was is very very generous
00:33:43
um down to earth sort of spoke at your
00:33:45
level even though he wasn't he was way
00:33:47
above it in terms of the stardom and who
00:33:50
he was but
00:33:51
um but also financially and it's often
00:33:55
that's the sort of stuff we kind of see
00:33:57
now some of the guys particularly the
00:33:59
Maori and Pacific island boys which I've
00:34:00
been really big on and the financial
00:34:02
space is making them understand
00:34:04
something I just
00:34:07
not just your money but sort of how it
00:34:09
all works yeah why you've got a mortgage
00:34:11
in the mortgages then what it looks like
00:34:12
what interest rates are how you get
00:34:14
because one day it's going to finish
00:34:16
and yeah there's always the only
00:34:18
guarantee isn't it yeah no one's going
00:34:19
to be there to tell you to actually say
00:34:21
well this is what it is you need to
00:34:23
refix your mortgage and and to why and
00:34:25
some guys have even ran up and said they
00:34:27
want to go to an auction and they're
00:34:28
like well have you got a pre-approval
00:34:30
and he's like oh what's that
00:34:32
um so it's crazy
00:34:34
um where does your literacy come from
00:34:37
you mentioned you bought you you were
00:34:39
telling some of the other guys about
00:34:40
buying houses and you had a house by the
00:34:42
time you're 20 or something yeah I just
00:34:43
I kind of just jumped in and did it and
00:34:45
then sort of asked questions whilst I
00:34:47
was a little bit quiet I sort of
00:34:48
understood what they kind of looked like
00:34:50
it helps when you've got mates that are
00:34:51
in
00:34:53
um and that sort of space to bounce you
00:34:55
know questions off as well but once you
00:34:57
understand
00:34:58
[Music]
00:34:59
um
00:35:00
what the banks are looking for and the
00:35:01
jargon that they're talking funny that's
00:35:05
often the case they're just talking oh
00:35:06
weeper Jag and
00:35:08
um when you strip it back it's really
00:35:10
really simple
00:35:11
um but sort of explaining it in a
00:35:13
simplistic way yeah
00:35:15
um I've had to read up a lot
00:35:17
um on sort of head but also experience
00:35:19
experience and stuffing things up uh not
00:35:23
quite doing your own stuff properly
00:35:25
um have been to that but also listening
00:35:27
I think
00:35:29
um we've got a really good team in there
00:35:31
just we just bounce sort of stuff off
00:35:33
because often it's where you learn the
00:35:34
most from someone else's mistakes when
00:35:36
they've worn some houses up um
00:35:40
um you know opportunity or um saying
00:35:44
it's Unfortunately they haven't quite
00:35:45
quite right and so it's just more around
00:35:47
that just the experience around a lot of
00:35:49
reading what's the coolest thing you've
00:35:51
done with your money did you manage to
00:35:53
buy your parents a house or anything or
00:35:54
I have a really cool so yeah I was I did
00:35:58
that in 2007 188 000 it cost me
00:36:04
yeah it was a lot of money at the time
00:36:07
when I was thinking to myself I'd
00:36:08
already just support purchase my house
00:36:11
um for 250 000 out Western Newland
00:36:16
so that's it I mean that time it was
00:36:19
crazy so um it's probably the best thing
00:36:21
I've done yeah that's really cool so it
00:36:24
was uh you bought her a house outright
00:36:26
or did you pay off your mortgage or no I
00:36:28
I got to a stage where I started using
00:36:31
money a bit better so using the banks
00:36:33
money to buy other things using equity
00:36:35
in it and going but it's a really
00:36:37
high-end thing to be able to understand
00:36:38
because you can do it that way my
00:36:40
often you hear my people or my brothers
00:36:42
and they say man now I did I did I hate
00:36:45
they got paid off got to pay adult paid
00:36:47
off as soon as I paid it off then what
00:36:48
but yeah it's good and bad debt there is
00:36:50
yeah so you're using actually good
00:36:51
ditability to
00:36:54
um uh to get you to another another
00:36:56
place and in the end that the safety is
00:36:58
as long as you don't lose your job
00:37:00
um you know that you can always sell one
00:37:02
off to pay for another one yeah um so
00:37:04
that's kind of how I've sort of geared
00:37:06
things up and generated sort of uh that
00:37:08
portfolio
00:37:10
um
00:37:11
but again it's just about learning sort
00:37:13
of how that works and
00:37:15
um you often get people asking about
00:37:18
equity and saying oh well I've got this
00:37:19
much Equity this makes you agree that
00:37:21
you've got to understand how the banks
00:37:22
use equity yeah and that's that's
00:37:24
probably the things that we like to
00:37:25
explain I love explaining it stuff yes
00:37:27
you can use
00:37:29
um I often use my own situation
00:37:32
um because it I just feels I relate to
00:37:35
it better and I I I can explain it
00:37:37
better because I've been through it so
00:37:39
that experience is is massive and
00:37:41
valuable yeah I love drawing on that
00:37:43
yeah you found a real passionate like I
00:37:45
I can see your eyes light up when you
00:37:48
talk about like the money and the
00:37:49
nuances of the finance markets so so you
00:37:52
um did you surprise your mum with the
00:37:54
house or was she expecting it or they
00:37:57
actually lived in Aussie so I was always
00:37:58
something that I wanted to do
00:38:00
um and then they moved back and so it
00:38:03
was a little bit of a surprise but
00:38:05
always something I suppose I've spoken
00:38:07
to her about about buying them a place
00:38:11
um
00:38:12
which is yeah she she lived in there for
00:38:14
years until last year and then sort of
00:38:17
moved out now my brother lives in it
00:38:19
um
00:38:21
but they're they you know mum's always
00:38:23
appreciative of that they probably can
00:38:25
do their own house they've actually
00:38:25
moved on to another house because I
00:38:27
bought it and bought that lift and then
00:38:28
I've got my other brother reading it but
00:38:30
not good advice to have a family living
00:38:32
in your own in your own yeah it doesn't
00:38:33
get you much healed at all yeah well
00:38:35
I've um yeah I'm lucky enough I've
00:38:37
managed to buy my mum an apartment so
00:38:39
she lives in uh she lives in Gray Lynn
00:38:40
and uh
00:38:42
it's still in my name I'm guessing
00:38:44
you're it's your mum yeah yeah yeah
00:38:45
um but I I was sort of thinking um oh
00:38:47
it's a good retirement thing and you
00:38:49
know mum can live rent free because it's
00:38:50
costing me a bit of money now but you
00:38:52
know whatever but it occurred to me that
00:38:54
we went overseas recently me and Mum and
00:38:55
so I'm 50 she's 71.
00:38:58
she's still gonna be alive at 90. so I'm
00:39:02
going to be like well and truly retired
00:39:04
by the time she can't accept that so I
00:39:07
can't rely on that oh you will be by
00:39:09
that time hopefully that house market
00:39:10
sort of just what they are crazy at the
00:39:12
moment they've gone ballistic they might
00:39:15
have doubled by the time you're right so
00:39:17
you might you might be okay and
00:39:18
hopefully you won't have too much too
00:39:19
much debt you can probably live off yeah
00:39:21
no it's all good
00:39:23
um I can say how many World Cups did you
00:39:25
do three three were you were you on the
00:39:27
one where we got beaten by France and
00:39:29
the yeah what you were saying was that
00:39:31
2007 2007. yeah yeah that was awful that
00:39:35
sucked so that was the semi quarterfinal
00:39:37
semi-final quarterfinal yeah so and they
00:39:40
just everything everything went lucky
00:39:42
for them yeah well I'm not lucky I just
00:39:44
we just like bounce on the balls oh man
00:39:46
we pee so bad
00:39:47
I've never watched that final at
00:39:49
quarterfinal I haven't got the I just
00:39:52
haven't got it in me to watch it
00:39:54
um it still hurts like a lot mainly
00:39:57
because you're like sorry I've still got
00:39:59
to go home
00:40:00
I've got to go back to New Zealand and
00:40:01
then they had the old okay well this we
00:40:03
didn't have flights here's the first
00:40:05
group that I'll go and go please don't
00:40:06
read my name out please don't read my
00:40:08
name out
00:40:09
I was lucky I was on the second I was on
00:40:11
the second list because I was going oh
00:40:12
good luck guys uh you guys gonna get
00:40:13
hammered when you get home from the
00:40:15
public but
00:40:16
it was a crazy time we just I mean
00:40:19
everything I mean we've often talked
00:40:21
about it a lot about the things that we
00:40:22
didn't quite but I think a lot of the
00:40:23
stuff that we didn't get quite right we
00:40:25
got it right in 2011.
00:40:28
well this is this is the thing of of
00:40:30
discovered in life like um your failure
00:40:32
is actually not a bad not a bad thing
00:40:33
like you learn you learn nothing from
00:40:35
your wins but you learn everything from
00:40:37
your from your your fails 100 and my
00:40:39
life has been like it has been like I've
00:40:42
failed so many times but I as long as
00:40:44
you get back up let's that's been my
00:40:47
biggest driver like man you can be in it
00:40:49
and man it's so tough a lot of the stuff
00:40:50
that you have gone through and even my
00:40:52
wife talks about it I don't know so
00:40:55
thick skin but you kind of get to a
00:40:58
level of Tolerance where you can you
00:40:59
know be thick skinned about the mistakes
00:41:01
that you've made and they're you know
00:41:02
obviously being in the public eye
00:41:05
um it comes you know 100 times more
00:41:08
because you're in New Zealand in a small
00:41:10
country of 5 million but everyone knows
00:41:11
who you are and what sort of happened so
00:41:13
you have to come a bit more uh resilient
00:41:16
in terms of those mistakes that you do
00:41:17
make but man I'm a big believer in
00:41:19
you've got to learn from that you know I
00:41:22
I often look at it now and see
00:41:24
um you know especially when you're
00:41:25
playing guys that are playing now with a
00:41:28
um I sort of um I suppose judge them on
00:41:31
can you bounce back rather than you know
00:41:33
not being able to bounce back for
00:41:35
something for a mistake that you might
00:41:37
have made off the field because I you
00:41:39
know guys and people do that you're so
00:41:42
much more respect for them because it's
00:41:43
a hard damn thing to do because it's so
00:41:45
easy to sort of curl up and say I'm not
00:41:46
sweet
00:41:47
um I'm a failure you're not there's
00:41:49
failure there's a real real massive in
00:41:51
terms of the growth in yourself and your
00:41:53
personal growth and whether you can come
00:41:54
back from those yeah I agree have you
00:41:56
always been resilient or do you think um
00:41:58
the [ __ ] you've been through over the
00:41:59
years has made you is that they're
00:42:02
saying what doesn't kill you makes you
00:42:03
stronger no man it's it's crazy it
00:42:05
probably has admittedly I would have
00:42:07
loved to have not had so many fuck-ups
00:42:09
but um
00:42:11
it has it really has and I think if you
00:42:15
draw back at the stuff you know my my
00:42:17
mum's as big and I've always sort of
00:42:20
it's
00:42:21
be my biggest driver you know when I've
00:42:24
sort of fallen off it's like oh [ __ ]
00:42:26
um it's not so much about me as sort of
00:42:28
how do I make it right so you know when
00:42:30
you're turning up at home and mum's
00:42:31
suddenly a smiley face telling you how
00:42:33
much she loves you you're like you know
00:42:35
deep down inside I know you're really
00:42:36
hurting but yeah that's been
00:42:39
um I suppose my biggest striving to try
00:42:41
and get back on and succeed yeah by the
00:42:43
way you you talk about fuck-ups like
00:42:45
there's been heaps of them there hasn't
00:42:47
though like from an outsider's
00:42:49
perspective at least it seems like it's
00:42:50
been a I mean it's a heck of a career
00:42:53
like we all know that but it feels like
00:42:54
the like indiscretions mistakes call
00:42:56
them whatever you want a like a you know
00:42:58
yeah really I know when you like the um
00:43:02
yeah the urinating a bar in the eye
00:43:04
socket thing like at the time it
00:43:06
probably feels like it's your entire
00:43:07
world but then you look in the rear view
00:43:09
like you know 20 years on now whatever
00:43:10
it is but it sort of feels like nothing
00:43:13
right yeah I made it does it's still
00:43:15
it's still a part of me that goes
00:43:17
[ __ ] it does
00:43:19
I mean it's always stuff that I've got
00:43:21
to get better at and it's probably the
00:43:23
alcohol
00:43:24
um you know it was but and a lot of my
00:43:25
stuff's always been public as well
00:43:27
there's the and the latest one and
00:43:30
um and Cardiff in terms of the sexual
00:43:32
assault stuff I mean it's that was again
00:43:35
[ __ ] after midnight
00:43:38
um yeah let's Okay since since you've
00:43:40
brought that up let's let's talk about
00:43:42
that because
00:43:43
um
00:43:43
yeah I I really felt for you through
00:43:46
this this whole thing so I woke up on a
00:43:48
Sunday morning here in New Zealand to
00:43:49
took my phone of flight mode and the
00:43:51
first pop-up I got was like staff or NZ
00:43:53
Herald and
00:43:54
um Mills arrested and then there's this
00:43:55
footage on TV so you're playing a game
00:43:57
there yep uh what club what team so I
00:44:00
was playing for uh connect in in Ireland
00:44:02
right and we just played the card of
00:44:05
Blues
00:44:06
um
00:44:08
and yeah we were we're out that night
00:44:10
yes
00:44:12
like it's it's crazy and this is
00:44:15
um just crazy how things panned out
00:44:18
um
00:44:19
would have been just your normal sort of
00:44:20
Night Out it will be you know yeah again
00:44:23
intoxicated and getting back and it was
00:44:25
well it wasn't until about a month later
00:44:27
that I we went back to play
00:44:30
um we went back to actually
00:44:33
Gloucester to play them and that's when
00:44:36
I got picked up I just injured myself
00:44:38
and I was walking off the field and
00:44:41
I walked off
00:44:43
um after the end of the game and then
00:44:44
these police through there and I was
00:44:47
like oh okay sweet I thought you did you
00:44:49
like your boots on my boots
00:44:51
I was limping off and I was just kind of
00:44:54
like [ __ ] um
00:44:56
got off and I just thought it was a
00:44:58
practical joke I thought like here's
00:45:01
um these cops and I go no no you need to
00:45:03
sit down and I was like I sit down just
00:45:04
outside change room then I like you
00:45:06
can't even actually I couldn't even
00:45:07
actually grab anything they said you
00:45:09
need to come with us and I was like I
00:45:10
stole
00:45:11
thought they were bullshitting me and
00:45:13
then it wasn't until now and they said
00:45:16
yeah we're gonna take down to the
00:45:18
station I was like okay sweet I might
00:45:20
just grab a jacket so I've trained our
00:45:22
baggage me and grab me a jacket I went
00:45:24
outside and as soon as I got outside the
00:45:26
camera was really like just waiting yeah
00:45:29
and I think when I look back in I was
00:45:31
that was probably the most guttering
00:45:33
part
00:45:34
um
00:45:35
I had no idea were you angry or just sad
00:45:37
or confused I didn't I had no idea what
00:45:40
the heck was going on I had no idea even
00:45:42
when so we went down and they took me to
00:45:43
the police station
00:45:44
I think later on I was really angry
00:45:46
because one the club knew was happening
00:45:49
yeah and two
00:45:52
so did so did the rest of the uh the
00:45:54
broadcasting the meeting decided to no
00:45:57
and I had no idea what the heck was
00:45:58
going on furthermore man my league was
00:46:01
aching so bad it wasn't funny mate but I
00:46:03
I went down there process and they had
00:46:05
to take me from Gloucester to Cardiff
00:46:08
still had no idea I had an absolutely no
00:46:10
idea what was going on I was in the back
00:46:12
of the petty wagon so you're running
00:46:13
through your mind what could I have done
00:46:14
yeah what am I what's what's going on
00:46:17
they didn't really say anything
00:46:19
um I got there this is during the 2015
00:46:22
Rugby World Cup I got there and Light
00:46:26
we went and started doing
00:46:28
um the paperwork they might have
00:46:30
mentioned it yeah I can't remember now
00:46:32
but they were really friendly talking to
00:46:34
me about the Rugby World Cup and stuff
00:46:36
like that and I was just in a different
00:46:37
world I just kind of like what the
00:46:39
heck's going on they gave me this book
00:46:40
to read about rights and stuff then they
00:46:42
put me in a cell and I was like so it
00:46:45
would have been about
00:46:46
in close to midnight I just come well no
00:46:50
it was at like 9 30 9 30 finished game
00:46:52
it took me to the glass Gloucester
00:46:54
Police Station done all the stuff there
00:46:56
put me in the Paddy working by the time
00:46:58
I got to
00:46:59
Carter if it was midnight put me in a
00:47:02
cell and then left me there
00:47:04
basically left me there
00:47:07
um h8 no they gave me let me have a
00:47:08
shower and put my Rugby gear back on
00:47:11
left me there
00:47:13
um and no one
00:47:15
came until about four o'clock the next
00:47:17
afternoon the next day oh my God so I
00:47:20
was just sitting there going I didn't
00:47:21
know what was going on
00:47:23
um
00:47:24
no contact with anyone else other than I
00:47:27
don't even think maybe perhaps it made
00:47:29
me a sandwich
00:47:30
and then I got then the lawyer someone
00:47:34
got a hold of a lawyer for me
00:47:36
and that was it it was all like I wasn't
00:47:39
allowed to talk about it
00:47:41
um went back what do they tell you what
00:47:45
do they tell you you're being charged
00:47:46
with no six years old that was it um but
00:47:48
no further details no nothing further
00:47:50
actually I mean they you know he came in
00:47:52
with me we went into an uh this was
00:47:54
about
00:47:55
um three three o'clock went into one of
00:47:57
those interviewing rooms and they asked
00:47:58
me to watch a video
00:48:00
and I was kind of like okay I'm watching
00:48:02
a video if I didn't see Jack Jack I
00:48:04
couldn't even tell you what I seen in
00:48:05
the video but all it was was
00:48:08
um uh female had sort of backed into me
00:48:12
and I turned around and just sort of
00:48:13
gave her a push
00:48:16
um and you could you couldn't even see
00:48:17
that side of it I mean I made out that I
00:48:20
that I'd given a sort of a
00:48:22
um but all you've seen was who back into
00:48:24
me there was basically all you could see
00:48:26
and then there was cameras going up so
00:48:29
you can see me going up the stairs
00:48:30
talking to the bouncers there's a police
00:48:32
woman there
00:48:33
outside which I shook hands with them um
00:48:35
and she was just there talking to the
00:48:37
bouncers
00:48:38
um
00:48:39
and that was all and that was all it was
00:48:42
that they sort of had neither see like
00:48:43
heavy samples of the um her pants had
00:48:46
been taken away and like this is a month
00:48:48
for later you know they were arrested me
00:48:50
out a month later so you would have
00:48:51
thought okay we've taken them away
00:48:52
straight after the
00:48:54
um alleged incident surely you would
00:48:56
have something out but
00:48:59
um and then you weren't allowed to talk
00:49:01
about it and this was the biggest
00:49:04
um
00:49:05
uh I suppose
00:49:08
we had to be you know that resilient
00:49:10
thick skin because one I was going
00:49:12
through marriage separation with the ex
00:49:13
my son was back here she was playing
00:49:15
real
00:49:17
um no not really amicable and stuff and
00:49:19
so there's all that crap going on I was
00:49:22
stuck in a um stuck in a hotel trying to
00:49:24
sort of say
00:49:26
um well trying to explain what was kind
00:49:28
of happening but then you weren't
00:49:29
allowed to talk about it
00:49:31
um so then come back and go far out and
00:49:35
the problem you have you know the
00:49:36
justice system you know right up until
00:49:39
you know you're you actually told to go
00:49:41
back you can't it's no Santa then you go
00:49:44
back and they try to put in the
00:49:45
Magistrate Court which is basically a
00:49:47
court beer system where you come in
00:49:49
you're in front of a judge that's there
00:49:50
for the day so I had to I came back to
00:49:53
New Zealand
00:49:55
um like we're sorry I went back to
00:49:56
Ireland and you know to wait around
00:49:57
until the next date which was
00:49:59
effectively after the end of the season
00:50:00
so it would have been about another four
00:50:01
or five months after which I'd come back
00:50:03
home to New Zealand then they were still
00:50:05
looking through stuff and then they
00:50:07
wanted me to fly all the way back to
00:50:08
plead guilty or not guilty in this
00:50:10
Magistrate Court which is basically
00:50:11
people have been done for drunk driving
00:50:13
they stand in front of a judge and the
00:50:15
judge basically says Ah you know he'll
00:50:17
slip you with a fine so they wanted me
00:50:19
to actually plead not to plead guilty
00:50:21
for this mess of ramifications of course
00:50:24
there is it's huge you're not just
00:50:25
you're not just saying in the and what
00:50:27
they've got it's kind of like I don't
00:50:29
understand why I'm actually here you
00:50:31
know so yeah also you'd never plead
00:50:34
guilty to something that you did not do
00:50:35
exactly no and that was that was that
00:50:38
hurt the most and there was a lot of
00:50:40
people around at the time there where I
00:50:42
just
00:50:43
they started scrambling to within that
00:50:45
team environment and that because they
00:50:47
were out with me and they didn't want to
00:50:48
get implicated yeah yeah like almost to
00:50:51
the fact that they wrote letters based
00:50:53
on China's supporter but all of the
00:50:55
leaders were was kind of being
00:50:57
supportive of your own case which really
00:50:58
pissed me off oh I can imagine um
00:51:01
imagine but yeah it's um yeah Lance
00:51:03
Armstrong's got the saying he talks
00:51:05
about
00:51:05
um yeah when [ __ ] hits the fan people
00:51:08
either lean in or lean out and I talked
00:51:10
about
00:51:11
um this with Matthew Ridge when he was
00:51:12
on the podcast last year and he goes he
00:51:14
goes not many people lean in
00:51:17
you'll really find out who you're who
00:51:19
you're mating you do man you do um
00:51:21
so I ended up going back and obviously I
00:51:26
there's no way so you they either say
00:51:28
well you just maybe that's what's going
00:51:29
to happen or you go and you get in front
00:51:31
of a but it's going to be a long process
00:51:34
because you're going to have to be in
00:51:35
front of the jury and it could but I
00:51:39
knew I was innocent yeah that's the
00:51:40
whole bloody thing there's no way you
00:51:42
know I was going to say I'm guilty for
00:51:44
doing what for nothing and I didn't
00:51:46
actually do anything you know and then
00:51:49
um
00:51:54
but the biggest thing is the whole in
00:51:57
New Zealand of looking at this yeah
00:51:59
sexual assault it's so bad it's like a
00:52:01
they it's like you know you've you've
00:52:04
been painted now as this guy sex
00:52:06
offender yeah and
00:52:07
um I know there's the uh the saying in
00:52:10
legal circles you know and it's an
00:52:11
essential proven guilty but it's not
00:52:12
really it's nice especially here yeah
00:52:16
um you never are and that's what I
00:52:19
suppose
00:52:31
there's nothing in there for me even
00:52:33
though all this [ __ ] was going on in the
00:52:34
background and assuming it um
00:52:38
um so yeah I stuck it out I was
00:52:40
um I ended up signing for Italy I'd
00:52:42
already signed for Italy before this all
00:52:44
happened and they were really good the
00:52:45
Italians say they looked after me
00:52:49
um
00:52:50
told them what had sort of happened and
00:52:52
then they they were really good
00:52:53
fantastic and then until that day we
00:52:55
went into court where they basically
00:52:57
threw the charges out and it was just
00:52:58
kind of that whole process in
00:53:02
um what you had to go through especially
00:53:04
my son my son was only like
00:53:06
704 but again it's like you know I often
00:53:09
go back in as much as I'm pissed off
00:53:11
about the whole system and what sort of
00:53:13
they've they've got you into to the
00:53:15
things ahead to the people they're doing
00:53:17
at the end of the day I made those
00:53:18
choices to to put yourself in a
00:53:20
vulnerable vulnerable position like what
00:53:23
what do you mean though what like what
00:53:24
choices did you make oh I think just not
00:53:27
just being out yeah I think because part
00:53:30
of me
00:53:31
has always sort of wanted to phase
00:53:33
myself out and be sort of anonymous you
00:53:36
almost get to a stage where you're like
00:53:38
you are you're thinking you are
00:53:40
anonymously out there because of your
00:53:41
mindset whereas in fact you never are
00:53:43
you absolutely never are regardless of
00:53:45
whether you know you're
00:53:48
um you know whether you're a
00:53:49
professional rugby player or not things
00:53:51
you do will always will always become
00:53:53
yeah no I mean they're saying so I've
00:53:56
almost already jumped into that mold
00:53:59
um so when you jump into that mode
00:54:00
you've got to have that in the back of
00:54:02
your mind that you know when you do that
00:54:03
do do go out that you are a Target
00:54:07
um and there's things that come in no
00:54:09
matter whether you like it or not that's
00:54:11
just that's just the case
00:54:13
but again it's just I I just can't
00:54:16
believe that um
00:54:19
you go through there like I've gone
00:54:21
through you know a lot of adversity in
00:54:24
my life a lot of stuff I was some of
00:54:26
them bought on by myself others that
00:54:29
should never have damn happened
00:54:31
um but you've got to be pretty thick
00:54:33
skin but that's probably made me who I
00:54:35
am today like a little confident like
00:54:37
you're saying what I've done but I also
00:54:40
understand too
00:54:42
um you know I've got three boys now I
00:54:45
understand the consequences that come
00:54:46
with with a lot of my decisions and also
00:54:49
enjoying in terms of the uh the ripple
00:54:51
effect on top yeah yeah absolutely and
00:54:53
the boys will never know that but the
00:54:54
thing is
00:54:56
fencing it's always there too yeah so
00:54:59
um you know my boys will be living in a
00:55:02
life of internet and Googling a name and
00:55:05
things coming up and so you know we're
00:55:08
always mindful that we've got to be
00:55:10
upfront and honest with the police
00:55:12
um because it's just this this day and
00:55:15
age is a lot different to when you know
00:55:18
the days that I was growing up in good
00:55:19
old invercargill with the wide roads
00:55:22
um so how do you how did you like
00:55:25
navigate your way through that that
00:55:26
period like waiting for the trial where
00:55:28
were you crying a lot were you just
00:55:30
angry
00:55:32
um like I just can't imagine I'm trying
00:55:34
to put myself in your shoes I can't
00:55:35
imagine how frustrating it was I didn't
00:55:37
I didn't cry nothing to cry about I am I
00:55:41
am I am an emotional person there's
00:55:42
nothing to cry about I was I was more
00:55:44
determined if like this is going to be
00:55:46
all right I knew him 100 percent
00:55:49
this
00:55:50
was going to be okay I had a lot of
00:55:53
support good support back home in New
00:55:54
Zealand with you know my mates down uh
00:55:56
Chiefs manager with the old Chiefs man
00:55:59
just sorry we're really good friends if
00:56:00
Joe was really there even though she was
00:56:02
um
00:56:03
I think it was good being away from New
00:56:04
Zealand
00:56:05
I'd hate to think what my son was going
00:56:08
through because held was he at the time
00:56:10
uh what was it 2014 so nine years ago uh
00:56:17
so he would have been four or five or
00:56:18
five
00:56:19
six actually yeah so like he's probably
00:56:23
young enough to not be too impacted yeah
00:56:25
not yeah exactly but still
00:56:28
um so I think to help being in Italian
00:56:29
they're telling us were wonderful it's a
00:56:31
wonderful place you are basically
00:56:33
anonymous because no one really knows
00:56:34
rugby bit
00:56:36
um so that definitely helped but I think
00:56:39
the frustrating part is that I knew the
00:56:41
day would come
00:56:43
um it was just win you know when would I
00:56:46
be able to tell my story and I haven't
00:56:47
really spoken about it I've only spoken
00:56:49
about it once since all today
00:56:51
I haven't really touched on what I've
00:56:53
seen in that video and some of the
00:56:55
things that I did see that perhaps I
00:56:57
might want to bring out one day
00:57:00
um that's that's the real Annoying part
00:57:04
for me
00:57:05
um
00:57:06
that you know when you say little people
00:57:08
lean in and lean out
00:57:10
um you know the people that link didn't
00:57:12
lent out had reasons as to why which is
00:57:16
um
00:57:17
it [ __ ] me off at the time but I've um
00:57:19
you know I've got a long memory and I'm
00:57:21
always one to really forgive but you
00:57:24
never forget though I'll never
00:57:26
um and that's what really annoyed me at
00:57:27
the time too you know whilst all this
00:57:29
was going on
00:57:32
but that's part of life you know it is
00:57:33
it's part of
00:57:35
um
00:57:37
understanding people and sort of working
00:57:40
your way through them being hardened
00:57:42
about it the one that's kind of and I've
00:57:44
always had that I don't know what what
00:57:46
what it is because of perhaps it's from
00:57:49
my upbringing and being always that
00:57:50
little boy that used to tag along with
00:57:52
my tag along my older brother and he
00:57:54
used to always sort of
00:57:55
yeah
00:57:56
sort of leave me behind and I was always
00:57:59
resilient in terms of their sort of beat
00:58:00
me up every now and then just sort of
00:58:02
stuff it's always been in me so yeah but
00:58:05
you don't you don't want to be um you
00:58:06
don't want to be too hard and you don't
00:58:08
want to become cynical you don't want to
00:58:10
become
00:58:10
that person but yeah mate I I don't know
00:58:14
how you navigated your way through that
00:58:16
through that period did you see a
00:58:18
therapist I have any counseling or
00:58:19
anything no no I didn't I didn't
00:58:21
um oh man I didn't really I just I
00:58:26
I didn't I don't even really know if I
00:58:28
really really talked too much about it I
00:58:29
think
00:58:30
Joe and I were over there and just sort
00:58:32
of I navigated my way through the I
00:58:34
think a lot of me knew
00:58:37
what had happened a lot of me knew that
00:58:39
I was it was going to be all right even
00:58:41
though at the time when you're sitting
00:58:42
in there you think [ __ ] I don't even
00:58:43
know how I don't even know how something
00:58:45
anyone could think like that you know
00:58:46
what I mean
00:58:48
um can you because what do you say in
00:58:50
the in the CCTV thing you you pushed it
00:58:52
what do you mean you pushed it
00:58:54
um
00:58:55
well she was in your personal space yeah
00:58:58
I I you literally I'm not like a shove
00:59:00
no no no no no
00:59:02
um but just an excuse me yeah yeah so
00:59:05
there's a there is there's a a pillar
00:59:08
there and she's basically turning around
00:59:09
and walked into me and bunt me into
00:59:11
another person and then I've kind of
00:59:14
like
00:59:17
it wasn't really really a push and then
00:59:21
she's turned around and we'll kind of
00:59:23
just see it or looks like it said things
00:59:27
um but then I ended up getting kicked
00:59:28
out but even the even
00:59:31
um
00:59:32
yeah sorry we walked out even in the
00:59:36
statements and stuff so you're trying to
00:59:37
piece all this together because you're
00:59:39
kind of like well here's some person say
00:59:42
this and another guy saying that and
00:59:43
we've walked out there's no
00:59:46
complaints to a police officer who was
00:59:48
right upstairs
00:59:50
I mean I'm not a conspiracy therapist
00:59:53
but at the time I'm just kind of like
00:59:55
there's just nothing and even when I was
00:59:57
looking at you can vaguely even see
01:00:00
me in the bar I when I first looked at
01:00:03
it they only showed me it twice and I
01:00:05
first looked at it I was kind of like I
01:00:07
don't even know what I'm looking for or
01:00:09
where I where I'm at
01:00:11
um
01:00:13
and that's that was basically it
01:00:15
um I wouldn't even say it was even a
01:00:19
push
01:00:20
um
01:00:22
that's the most disappointing part about
01:00:24
it was just kind of like
01:00:26
and there's just nothing you know
01:00:29
um
01:00:29
but again when I look at look at it I
01:00:32
think
01:00:33
that got themselves into that much now
01:00:35
that it made
01:00:37
um that it made what they had to it's
01:00:39
like you had to go through it you know
01:00:41
there wasn't but even the month
01:00:43
before they even
01:00:45
did all that you know you've got to be
01:00:47
surely you've got to know that
01:00:50
you've got to have something you know it
01:00:51
was like I mean the whole time was
01:00:53
almost like it's funny because I look
01:00:55
back and say when I'm in the pot when
01:00:58
I'm in the cell and I'm sitting in there
01:01:00
for the whole time that I was in there
01:01:01
that I was almost like they try to
01:01:04
exhaust the crap out of me to see do
01:01:07
something
01:01:09
um which I was kind of like this is so
01:01:10
weird but man you had I had a lot of
01:01:12
time to think about
01:01:15
so much [ __ ] because I didn't know what
01:01:17
was going on uh so you're trying to run
01:01:19
through everything even slightly better
01:01:21
I didn't even know what the heck is
01:01:23
doing there you were in the single been
01:01:24
people yelling because it's a weekend
01:01:25
right and so they're all yelling they're
01:01:27
all intoxicated and they're like [ __ ]
01:01:29
I'm just I'm sure it was just a bit of
01:01:31
torture that they sort of sent me yeah
01:01:33
they gave me just to very say mate
01:01:35
they're just going to talk to you for a
01:01:36
little bit and then
01:01:37
by four o'clock the next in the
01:01:40
afternoon the next day we might even try
01:01:42
and see if we can get anything out of
01:01:43
here
01:01:45
um yeah that must have been such a so
01:01:47
you see you go to court that must have
01:01:48
been a nerve-wracking experience because
01:01:50
I I you you know
01:01:52
unequivocally that um you've done
01:01:54
nothing wrong but there must be like a
01:01:56
little bit of you that thinks well you
01:01:57
know maybe you know stranger things have
01:01:59
happened no it's a funny thing because
01:02:00
like there's two phases to the court
01:02:03
stuff so you have that and we plead not
01:02:04
guilty then there's another court date
01:02:06
yeah you come out and you're in front of
01:02:08
them so you you know going through that
01:02:10
whole period then there's another court
01:02:12
date where you're basically saying
01:02:13
you're not guilty again to then for them
01:02:15
to work out you know
01:02:17
um you know how the jewelry stuff's
01:02:19
going to work or what happens
01:02:21
so the second time we've been in there
01:02:23
by the time we sort of got there they
01:02:24
were like now leaving's
01:02:26
gonna be dropped and you're going to
01:02:29
just wasted all that time so I was going
01:02:31
in there going okay here's it's not
01:02:33
we're not doing it today
01:02:34
it is going to be another time where
01:02:36
it's all going to happen and that's when
01:02:38
the public will understand and know and
01:02:41
people will know that I haven't done
01:02:43
anything you know and so
01:02:46
because it was cut short it's probably
01:02:48
you know unexpected and they didn't tell
01:02:50
me until we're about to sort of
01:02:51
literally go in we're like hey hey these
01:02:53
guys want to we want to have a chat
01:02:56
um the lawyer wanted
01:02:58
um
01:02:59
uh they'd spoke to the way the police in
01:03:01
it and it was basically
01:03:03
done so within the I it was literally I
01:03:06
didn't know what to think because at the
01:03:07
time I was just kind of thinking far out
01:03:09
um
01:03:10
this is crazy because I'm about to go in
01:03:13
the air and all this that I've gone
01:03:14
through has been for nothing because I
01:03:16
wanted people to see things I wanted
01:03:18
them to see that and see exactly yeah
01:03:20
from the rooftop not even not even even
01:03:22
this even this this CCTV I'm like me I
01:03:25
want people to see that I want people to
01:03:27
see
01:03:28
um I mean understanding that you know
01:03:31
that her pants got taken away straight
01:03:33
after to be tested fingerprints and it
01:03:35
was kind of like it's the most stupidest
01:03:37
thing that you could ever you know think
01:03:38
about but surely at that time when you
01:03:41
when you're taking someone off a rugby
01:03:43
pitch
01:03:44
driving them two or three hours buddy
01:03:47
Cardiff chucking them in a um in a cell
01:03:50
that you're gonna
01:03:53
it's guilty all day do you know what I
01:03:55
mean yeah look it looks yeah the Optics
01:03:57
are bad yeah I mean it's it's not good
01:04:00
no you think Mills must have done
01:04:01
something really really bad yeah yeah
01:04:03
exactly and that's and that was way
01:04:05
unfortunately it was betrayed because as
01:04:08
soon as you use the language sexual
01:04:10
assault as like Unity rape
01:04:13
um and they I mean at the time you
01:04:16
I mean it's still a bit of anger you
01:04:17
think [ __ ] now why can't she be named
01:04:19
that yeah yeah at the same time you're
01:04:23
gonna [ __ ] I mean what are the
01:04:25
reasoning
01:04:27
stay here or whatever I mean that part
01:04:29
of the part of me wanted that trial that
01:04:32
happened before that reason yeah
01:04:34
to actually
01:04:36
name the person too because I knew I
01:04:40
knew 100 that I hadn't done anything
01:04:42
and and so I suppose the next goal was I
01:04:45
can't wait for this to happen if it's
01:04:47
not something that you can't wait for
01:04:49
but I always knew the day would come
01:04:51
yeah
01:04:53
um and it came a lot earlier even though
01:04:54
it wasn't
01:04:55
still wages to get to earlier than what
01:04:57
I was anticipating yeah
01:05:00
it's a lot to go through
01:05:02
I don't say it's a lot she said I reckon
01:05:05
Life Is Life for the most part it's um
01:05:07
pretty flat and boring and then in
01:05:09
between there's some there's some real
01:05:10
real highs and real real lows for
01:05:12
everyone your highs have been very very
01:05:15
high your lows have been very low as
01:05:18
well
01:05:19
they're crazy yeah yeah but I mean the
01:05:21
early the ones in the early 20s they
01:05:23
were yeah that's you you know you own
01:05:26
that you wear that that's your fault but
01:05:27
this one um yeah this is that what a
01:05:30
what a thing to go through yeah and I
01:05:32
think man
01:05:33
that's not something you dwell on like
01:05:35
yeah how do you not I don't I just where
01:05:39
does that come from
01:05:40
um
01:05:42
I'm not a I'm not a big believer in
01:05:44
holding on to holding on to stuff you
01:05:46
know I know you know you don't you don't
01:05:48
I mean yeah
01:05:50
you never forget you don't but [ __ ]
01:05:52
holding a grudge on so much [ __ ] is just
01:05:55
it's not healthy it's not really
01:05:58
are you excited by the things ahead you
01:06:00
know my life's I mean my life's way
01:06:02
better than what it was during that
01:06:03
period of time I've learned a lot from
01:06:06
that you know
01:06:08
um
01:06:09
I've got a wonderful family just just
01:06:11
things like that you can just you know
01:06:13
there's no use holding on to [ __ ] I mean
01:06:15
don't you be wrong every now don't be
01:06:17
angry but
01:06:19
um
01:06:20
yeah just wasted energy sort of holding
01:06:22
on yeah yeah I went 100 and how was your
01:06:25
um she was your girlfriend at the time
01:06:26
mate how was sheets with this whole
01:06:28
period
01:06:29
uh yeah she was good yeah um well I
01:06:31
think so I I think she struggled the
01:06:33
most because there is a bit in there
01:06:34
where and you can understand Lee
01:06:38
um
01:06:39
and it's understandable that there would
01:06:41
have been doubts in her mind about sort
01:06:43
of what happened yeah she's got her
01:06:45
friends
01:06:46
yeah yeah
01:06:48
um
01:06:49
that it was you know she's
01:06:51
she understands I mean there's still
01:06:54
there that side of me who's bubbly and
01:06:55
stuff and likes a bit of
01:06:57
to layer up every now and then but Jay
01:06:59
was Joe has been awesome in um in terms
01:07:02
of I play you know her support during
01:07:05
that time
01:07:06
was probably a lot of that probably got
01:07:08
me through this is very similar to my
01:07:10
mother
01:07:11
um
01:07:12
but yeah we I mean we hardly I haven't
01:07:15
spoken about this
01:07:16
um
01:07:17
since I did an interview for one of the
01:07:20
Irish
01:07:21
um kiwis that we did
01:07:23
um
01:07:24
because it's just not no it's not
01:07:26
something you sort of dwell back on no
01:07:28
well thanks for talking about it better
01:07:30
today
01:07:31
um yeah I I mean I wasn't sure if you if
01:07:33
you wanted to or not and either way
01:07:34
that's cool but there's I mean I suppose
01:07:37
because it's reasonably recent it feels
01:07:39
like a you know if if this was the Mills
01:07:42
book it probably feels like a chapter or
01:07:44
a couple of chapters but I'd love to
01:07:46
write down the book I I yeah I sit back
01:07:48
and I wrote the one that I wrote too
01:07:49
early I think I think um I'm definitely
01:07:52
a different person I've different got a
01:07:54
different sort of
01:07:56
um perspective of life and stuff too
01:07:58
it's funny though just how how much you
01:08:00
change um I've had Adam priori on the
01:08:03
podcast and he's um he's 52 now and he
01:08:06
he says he doesn't recognize the cocky
01:08:09
Brash Wicket keeper that he was in his
01:08:12
early twenties and it's like but that
01:08:14
was his authentic self at the time but
01:08:15
you just change and you grow and then I
01:08:17
think if you if you get to middle age
01:08:19
and you're embarrassed about some of the
01:08:20
stuff you've done it's probably it's
01:08:22
probably good yeah it's not a bad thing
01:08:23
isn't it yeah well I mean the
01:08:25
alternative's not changing at all and
01:08:27
yeah that's no good so what are the yeah
01:08:30
okay we'll close we'll close that
01:08:32
chapter because I appreciate you being
01:08:34
so honest honest and open about it
01:08:35
because I can tell it's not an easy
01:08:36
thing to talk about thank you so thanks
01:08:38
for talking about it on my podcast today
01:08:40
um you're good I'm good yeah I'm good
01:08:42
yeah it's um
01:08:44
it's actually quite
01:08:46
um cathartic yeah I don't say like it's
01:08:48
kind of like
01:08:49
because
01:08:51
I wouldn't say I'm apprehensive about
01:08:53
bringing it up but it's also important
01:08:55
that
01:08:57
um it is part of my life too that you're
01:08:59
kind of like thinking far out
01:09:01
um it's um recognizing acknowledging
01:09:04
that how the freaking heck I went
01:09:07
through that I don't even like just you
01:09:09
talking about it and then sort of seeing
01:09:10
it today I was like
01:09:12
I'll let you move through that [ __ ] and
01:09:14
um yeah
01:09:16
and it makes things
01:09:19
way better now just sort of is a good
01:09:21
way to celebrate sort of the success of
01:09:23
head off the field to having gone
01:09:25
through that that nonsense how is it how
01:09:28
has it changed you like you do you avoid
01:09:31
going out now um or I mean you shouldn't
01:09:33
because you know you didn't do anything
01:09:35
wrong but yeah I I mean I still like
01:09:38
going I don't go out as much as what I
01:09:40
used to um kids sort of have um had that
01:09:43
effect on us but yeah if you're 43 and
01:09:47
you're rolling at a spy bar at two in
01:09:48
the morning
01:09:50
it's not it's not good the next day
01:09:52
either so yeah best maturity isn't it
01:09:55
it's just just growing up and then
01:09:56
understanding
01:09:57
that you know a good time
01:10:00
it's about planning your good times like
01:10:02
you know
01:10:03
um and then having sort of things in
01:10:05
place I've got a really good group of
01:10:07
friends that understand you know who I
01:10:09
am and what I do that we're not sort of
01:10:11
going out to get muddled anymore or
01:10:13
putting yourself in a vulnerable
01:10:15
position
01:10:16
where I think
01:10:18
a lot of my friends never wouldn't do
01:10:20
that just for a sheer laughter at all
01:10:22
it's not funny because the consequence
01:10:23
of me is way bigger yeah it is it is
01:10:26
you're gonna mess up I mean yeah as we
01:10:28
said you're one of like nine people that
01:10:29
have played 100 tests so yeah the Target
01:10:31
on your back for the rest of your life
01:10:33
is massive yeah so yes I've just got an
01:10:35
understanding of it I mean and to be
01:10:38
honest I really I appreciate
01:10:40
having a few at home and just um going
01:10:42
to the beach and doing the same thing
01:10:44
even
01:10:45
three or four years or whatever that is
01:10:47
eventually going to the state of origin
01:10:48
which I can't wait for but um even my
01:10:51
mates talk about that hey we just got to
01:10:53
make sure we
01:10:54
don't get too carried away it's just we
01:10:56
would never have those conversations
01:10:57
before yeah I mean so
01:11:00
um it's just been mindful of you right
01:11:01
but there's never no way you'd go back
01:11:03
to the stuff that I used to do yeah and
01:11:06
um who's your close group of mates are
01:11:08
they any of them anyone that would know
01:11:10
now the majority of my schoolmates from
01:11:13
Custom boys
01:11:14
we've got a really good group
01:11:17
um all my mates here it's just funny
01:11:19
everyone always asks you you know who's
01:11:20
your mates from the real blacks like you
01:11:22
know you get on with the most you love
01:11:24
them mate it was like your best mates
01:11:26
when you're there and when you leave the
01:11:28
environment you go back to your own
01:11:29
families and friends but when you come
01:11:30
back it's like you've never left but
01:11:32
they're not they're not your mates
01:11:33
they're not yours yeah they're your
01:11:34
workmates yeah right and so
01:11:37
but I've got a real man-made since you
01:11:39
know when I came up to custom all my
01:11:42
group of friends are still still around
01:11:43
and we have a group chat and we
01:11:45
occasionally we sort of we should really
01:11:48
catch up more but we always say we do
01:11:49
but we never do but we keep in contact
01:11:52
which is fantastic yeah
01:11:54
um so how many World Cups did you win
01:11:56
just the one just one 2011 yeah [ __ ]
01:11:58
how good was that mate oh my God here so
01:12:01
that was the the game against France
01:12:02
what was it eight seven in the finals
01:12:03
yeah yeah oh crazy that was the worst
01:12:07
game to watch Ever that was just awesome
01:12:09
I was watching this I was injured as
01:12:11
well so I was watching him beside Dan
01:12:13
and it's got to be the most
01:12:16
nerve-wracking moment of Our Lives even
01:12:18
with beef
01:12:21
it's just kind of like [ __ ] this is
01:12:23
please don't let this happen again to us
01:12:25
because
01:12:25
that would have been our third time yeah
01:12:27
that's right that the whole thing is
01:12:29
absurd hey so yeah um yeah Dan got
01:12:32
injured early on Richie had a broken
01:12:34
foot and was like barely training during
01:12:36
the week and training and like running
01:12:38
shoes and Aaron cruden got called up and
01:12:40
then Stephen Donald yeah and then all
01:12:43
the you know all the stuff that it
01:12:44
happened with
01:12:45
um Corey Jane and is he going out and
01:12:48
stuff and that I mean
01:12:53
it needed a good ending and a good
01:12:55
ending was that we won yeah well we
01:12:57
should not because France played way
01:12:59
better than what we did
01:13:00
but this stuff in 2007 was what got us
01:13:04
home and oh man we had some good couple
01:13:06
of days of um of celebrations
01:13:09
2007 was that the one that we talked
01:13:11
about earlier yeah yeah 2003 we lost the
01:13:14
semi-final to Australia 2007 we lost the
01:13:17
quarters to France and
01:13:19
2011 we won yeah so we talked about
01:13:21
earlier like you learn more much more
01:13:23
from your family failures don't they
01:13:24
yeah so that um the one in uh 2007
01:13:27
against France I remember you know the
01:13:30
shots of um yeah Ted Graham Henry and
01:13:33
Richie at the press conference
01:13:33
afterwards and Richie just looks yeah
01:13:36
like like numb he does the thing where
01:13:38
he rubs his face and everyone thought he
01:13:40
was sort of crying and he he wasn't but
01:13:42
he you know you could tell he was just
01:13:43
distressed or unhappy nice that's one of
01:13:46
the days that you do want to forget
01:13:48
about it man
01:13:50
it's still here it says
01:13:52
because I think because for a lot of us
01:13:54
we're at our time in our career we were
01:13:56
going to be finishing up
01:13:58
and then obviously if we'd won that it
01:14:00
would have been perfect we had it didn't
01:14:01
go overseas and make some money um well
01:14:03
you know
01:14:05
um cash United but then you're kind of
01:14:06
getting to the age of 27 next one's like
01:14:08
31 you're like [ __ ] I don't know if I'll
01:14:10
make it yeah that's that's definitely
01:14:12
what I fell into I was like oh far out
01:14:14
now
01:14:15
so it was way more satisfying to win
01:14:18
that because of what we'd gone through
01:14:19
in 2007 more so than 2003 because it was
01:14:22
so young we're probably a little bit
01:14:24
naive in terms of the whole world cup
01:14:25
stuff for a lot of us it came through
01:14:28
um from 2003 so
01:14:30
11 was fantastic man it's so cool and
01:14:33
you've I mean you know you've you've got
01:14:35
such good life and there's um yeah
01:14:37
you're thriving with the business and
01:14:38
there's so much to look forward to do
01:14:40
spend much time like reflecting or
01:14:41
looking back are you much of a
01:14:43
sentimentalist like that
01:14:44
I am not I'm not a centimeters I am
01:14:48
I mean even my jerseys they are keyless
01:14:50
where I live really where are they
01:14:53
in a box in a garage downstairs and
01:14:57
um how many of them did you give away
01:14:58
how many how many of you still
01:15:04
[Laughter]
01:15:10
oh my God really I only did it who
01:15:14
priced them oh [ __ ] she went and got
01:15:15
them that he valued it um somewhere
01:15:18
overseas but I I didn't even actually I
01:15:21
didn't even care I was kind of like no
01:15:23
sweet as Southern but it wasn't at all
01:15:25
like
01:15:26
um I mean they itemize it because I
01:15:29
didn't have them there he talked to my
01:15:32
kids and my son who they were here with
01:15:35
us you're not there can I have one of
01:15:37
your jerseys and you're like oh [ __ ]
01:15:38
okay how am I going to keep these in if
01:15:40
I'm going to sell them and that was the
01:15:42
only reason
01:15:43
um so I was like you've got to buy them
01:15:44
so I mean [ __ ] the scheme of thing
01:15:46
they said is for the boys and my
01:15:48
Middle's somewhere my Commonwealth Games
01:15:51
is that a gold I've got a commonwealth
01:15:52
games gold medal which is the boys and
01:15:55
my cap
01:15:56
that they put on every now and then
01:15:58
they're probably it's probably lost
01:15:59
somewhere under their beds or something
01:16:01
um 100 tests for my Hundred tests I know
01:16:05
I know it's about uh pull your head up I
01:16:08
know I've got to come on I just doesn't
01:16:10
it's not I'm not big on there I'm going
01:16:12
to donate them to a museum or something
01:16:13
yeah I should really I should I mean I
01:16:15
I've given them some away since I've
01:16:18
finished speaking they've asked them for
01:16:19
charity in there they literally are in a
01:16:22
suitcase like collecting dust because
01:16:26
I'm I'm not a I'm not big on seller
01:16:28
Brown like this I don't even have a
01:16:29
jersey up in my house mums which I'm
01:16:32
more embarrassed about she she puts one
01:16:34
up at her place and I'm like man you've
01:16:36
got to get that down
01:16:38
um it's just not so like Memories for me
01:16:41
is more important than that like I don't
01:16:43
need a Sentimental thing to say far I'm
01:16:45
afraid you know this is what I did but
01:16:46
my kids now it's more it's they love it
01:16:50
you know they love it effective they
01:16:51
kind of still can't believe I was in all
01:16:52
black
01:16:54
um well not just normal like a like a
01:16:55
great orbler oh yeah how many how many
01:16:58
tries did you where are you on the try
01:16:59
list no I'm way behind so I wouldn't
01:17:02
even have a clue how many tries I sort
01:17:03
of scored um
01:17:05
my kids keep asking me that I should
01:17:07
really do a Google search by the way can
01:17:09
I just say you're a hopeless
01:17:20
is it a modesty thing or what is it like
01:17:23
where do you think this comes from my
01:17:25
memories are up here and probably in
01:17:27
here more than anything else like [ __ ]
01:17:30
memories you can't remember how many
01:17:31
tries yeah yeah
01:17:33
I think this once you've sort of done it
01:17:35
you're kind of it's
01:17:37
it's probably more also related to when
01:17:39
I said you know I want to I don't want
01:17:42
to become Anonymous that's probably part
01:17:43
of it too I don't need to hold on to
01:17:45
stuff to say man
01:17:47
that's me that's my identity because
01:17:49
being an all black isn't like you as a
01:17:52
person and going through what you've
01:17:54
done and what you're doing now and
01:17:56
inspiring other people that's
01:17:58
that's more me you know I love I love
01:18:01
helping people which is why I'm in this
01:18:03
sort of space particularly in the Maori
01:18:05
and Pacific island space so we have a
01:18:06
lot and then we've had massive success
01:18:09
in terms of home ownership for for
01:18:13
Pacific Islanders which I'm really proud
01:18:15
of
01:18:16
um I don't need
01:18:17
even though it's probably you know
01:18:19
getting in front of the um these
01:18:21
families have come from being an
01:18:22
all-black I don't need to Dingle and say
01:18:24
hey this is who I am and when all black
01:18:27
you know you need to that I don't know I
01:18:30
just I've just never never had that
01:18:33
before my probably the the one Jersey
01:18:35
that I probably do hold on to that I've
01:18:37
folded and lifted my wardrobe as the New
01:18:40
Zealand schools Jersey that I actually
01:18:41
gave away to want to the Solomons which
01:18:43
they gifted back to me on my 40th
01:18:46
um and it's funny because I've rode on
01:18:48
the back of it the score
01:18:50
um the massive jerseys and that's
01:18:52
probably the only ones that I love
01:18:53
there's an under 19 ones that they gave
01:18:54
back to and that's probably more
01:18:57
um special to me because that's where my
01:19:00
journey started yeah
01:19:02
um from all of that so I would say and
01:19:06
literally I mean it's not hung up or
01:19:07
anything but it's it's folded
01:19:09
sitting underneath my baseball caps I
01:19:12
think so um
01:19:14
but I I mean it's yeah like part of me
01:19:16
shakes my head in disbelief that um
01:19:18
you've got these these amazing things
01:19:20
and you know you couldn't care less
01:19:21
about them but then
01:19:23
um part of me I I'm I'm [ __ ] proud of
01:19:25
you because it means um you know if you
01:19:27
weren't doing anything worthwhile with
01:19:28
your life now it'd be very easy just to
01:19:30
like sit in the past yeah or look in the
01:19:32
past but the fact that you're doing good
01:19:34
stuff and you're thriving in this next
01:19:36
um phase of your of your life and like
01:19:38
people say life short but it's actually
01:19:39
bloody long
01:19:40
you're like another career or a couple
01:19:43
of careers ahead of you I think it's
01:19:44
kind of cool yeah I love it I I love
01:19:46
what I'm doing
01:19:48
I'm busy
01:19:49
um probably too busy now I'm and it's so
01:19:52
crazy because I'm now going to the Rugby
01:19:54
World Car the fourth one is a
01:19:55
commentator and I never in my wildest
01:19:58
dreams would I ever thought [ __ ] I'm
01:20:00
actually
01:20:01
I'm actually commentating I'll
01:20:03
commentate and actually say stuff in the
01:20:06
weekends and in shows and now I'm going
01:20:09
to you know the Pinnacle of rugby and
01:20:12
I'm actually calling a game and to be
01:20:14
selected to do that and be trusted to do
01:20:17
this
01:20:18
um man it's
01:20:21
um it's hard because I know I have to
01:20:22
leave my family behind
01:20:25
um yeah how do you how old are your
01:20:26
younger kids now so max is 14 uh
01:20:29
McKenzie he's five and Marco's four
01:20:32
right so I'm not a big traveler yeah um
01:20:34
and Scott Skye have been awesome for me
01:20:36
they've been like um
01:20:38
in terms of even domestically so
01:20:42
um but to have them sort of beg me to go
01:20:44
over the world cup for nine weeks I know
01:20:47
we'll get there
01:20:49
um it's going to be massive so I'm
01:20:50
really looking forward forward to that
01:20:52
so I've got a really I feel I've got a
01:20:54
really good balance in life I've got a
01:20:55
nice nice job Monday to Monday to
01:20:59
um well it's not really a job because
01:21:00
it's your own company yes I mean I get
01:21:03
to the Fridays and you're starting to
01:21:05
prep for the weekend and
01:21:07
um then you go through there the hardest
01:21:08
part is when the All Blacks don't go so
01:21:11
well because
01:21:12
it's been a rough one yeah how do you
01:21:15
yeah how do you how do you find that so
01:21:17
um when you were a player
01:21:19
um if a commentator or a writer or
01:21:21
whatever JK's say for example wrote
01:21:23
something mean about you were you did
01:21:26
you get salty about it you no way
01:21:27
because you know and I've always said
01:21:29
that man I'm I'm when I'm finished I'm
01:21:31
never gonna be that old old all black
01:21:33
guy that's going to beg the guys because
01:21:35
you know
01:21:37
I hope I hope it comes like I know I'm
01:21:40
I'm mindful of the words you use
01:21:42
um
01:21:43
you got to have an opinion and I think
01:21:45
the more that I've said in this role The
01:21:48
more I've been comfortable with having
01:21:49
an independent because at the same time
01:21:51
you're sort of still certainly man I
01:21:52
don't want to say that about them or I
01:21:54
don't have the right to say that
01:21:56
um but there's ways of doing it
01:21:58
um and being respected uh respectable
01:22:01
about it yeah and then hopefully it
01:22:03
doesn't get taken out of context because
01:22:04
a lot of it does it makes good
01:22:06
um clickbait it does yeah big time and
01:22:09
unfortunately that's just the world we
01:22:10
kind of live in but I've always been
01:22:13
um
01:22:14
but you also you don't want to lie about
01:22:17
the way they're going either you know
01:22:18
because as a former player so you know
01:22:21
when you're playing [ __ ] you know you
01:22:22
think you haven't found form but you
01:22:24
believe in the fact that it's going to
01:22:25
come
01:22:26
so I often kind of put myself in the
01:22:28
issues in terms of what man how would I
01:22:30
feel how would I be feeling right now
01:22:32
and why are these challenges sort of
01:22:34
happening why isn't you know
01:22:36
um
01:22:37
so I I am it is I am very mindful of
01:22:40
that but at the same time I think I've
01:22:41
gotten really comfortable
01:22:43
um the guy's Sky have been awesome
01:22:45
comfortable in what I what I have my
01:22:48
opinion and that I has she had one I
01:22:51
feel like um New Zealand's a like a in
01:22:54
general like a kind of place now like
01:22:55
you talked about being nervous about
01:22:56
coming back from the
01:22:58
2007 was the World Cup yeah yeah I feel
01:23:00
like um New Zealand's a more tolerant
01:23:02
place now the backlash like but you're
01:23:04
not going to get people spitting on you
01:23:05
like they did it to coach John Hart back
01:23:07
in the day no but it it helps that
01:23:09
you've won a couple of World World Cups
01:23:11
too so once we've done it that way we
01:23:14
only won one yeah yeah but uh you know
01:23:16
say oh well we can't win it every time
01:23:18
yeah yeah I think you know they're more
01:23:19
receptive of that you know kiwis
01:23:21
that's it's tough the other they've
01:23:25
always been chasing out there but we're
01:23:26
more realistic now in terms of our
01:23:30
know hey we can't win them all you can
01:23:32
you absolutely can't it was the day we
01:23:34
where we did and we were very successful
01:23:36
I mean that got boring too right yeah
01:23:38
almost would worry about I think 93 sort
01:23:41
of one uh record so it was just crazy I
01:23:43
know and that's massive in terms of
01:23:45
sport in general right and so
01:23:48
um I think you know kiwi's having these
01:23:49
other things too that that are around
01:23:51
we're so successful so many other sports
01:23:54
and um even you know even individual
01:23:56
sports is is awesome yeah
01:23:58
and how's your um how's your
01:24:00
relationship with the the X now is there
01:24:02
any sort of relationship now yeah that's
01:24:04
all right it's just because you're the
01:24:06
oldest boy together yes yeah yeah yeah
01:24:09
so you're co-parenting okay I think it's
01:24:12
good these things take time eh oh mates
01:24:15
I don't
01:24:16
know it's not a party like we don't talk
01:24:18
so I think yeah for Max's sake we sort
01:24:21
of just um just gotten on with it and
01:24:23
we've got the process sets in place it's
01:24:25
pretty good I am I am still mindful of
01:24:26
the fact of
01:24:28
um max is a big part of our Lives yeah
01:24:30
so we give them 50 50.
01:24:33
um
01:24:34
but he's becoming
01:24:36
um their teenage boy too that I was and
01:24:38
I often put myself in the man where is
01:24:39
he at with this and
01:24:42
um
01:24:43
be mindful of of my role in this even
01:24:46
though I don't get on with his mother
01:24:48
yeah yeah but yeah yeah I'm you're both
01:24:51
respectful of each other like you know
01:24:52
bad-mouthing each other no it's well I
01:24:55
don't I can't control it she she does
01:24:57
but I think
01:25:00
it took a long time I mean you talk
01:25:02
about the court process that we've just
01:25:04
spoken about yeah it took me a long time
01:25:06
to get to where this you know mixer so
01:25:08
perhaps part of that for me hardened me
01:25:11
in terms of the stuff that I was going
01:25:13
through
01:25:14
um
01:25:15
because even that part of
01:25:17
getting access to mix was very difficult
01:25:20
in the justice system
01:25:22
um
01:25:23
but yeah
01:25:25
um oh God the messiness of being an
01:25:27
adult hey I'll make life is tough and
01:25:30
again I I talk about experience right
01:25:32
and so covert bought us
01:25:36
another you really wanted business you
01:25:39
know through breakups
01:25:41
um and when you're talking to clients
01:25:43
about your own experiences and buying
01:25:46
back your hundred old jerseys whatever
01:25:48
it is whatever it was they laugh right
01:25:51
they laugh about that yeah and so you
01:25:57
that's the experience I'm talking about
01:25:59
going through you you can't beat going
01:26:01
through the stuff up something you know
01:26:02
I I hope awful at the time though yeah
01:26:05
absolutely but you've you've got to use
01:26:07
that in some way and that's how I use my
01:26:10
experiences man and there's
01:26:11
and what's the lesson in this what does
01:26:14
that mean the the listening think about
01:26:16
the kids yeah you know you're going to
01:26:18
get to the end result
01:26:19
but what what does that cost you in
01:26:21
terms of not just monetary but the
01:26:24
mental burden on urine kids I'm not
01:26:26
there to be a psychologist but I'm there
01:26:28
to share
01:26:29
my frustrations that I had that I
01:26:32
probably would have done things a little
01:26:33
bit different too and sort of
01:26:36
um be supportive around some of the
01:26:38
things they need so admittedly you just
01:26:40
there to give them your financial
01:26:42
advice in terms of where they can get to
01:26:44
and what they're working to try and do
01:26:45
whether it's buy out or
01:26:48
um you know sell everything up and then
01:26:50
buy but I think there's also an element
01:26:52
to where you're sort of because you've
01:26:55
gone through it yourself
01:26:56
um
01:26:57
that you can't appreciate some of the
01:26:59
things that you're actually talking I
01:27:00
mean you're selling all your portfolio
01:27:02
and giving halfway and you're thinking
01:27:04
okay you're never gonna you're never
01:27:06
gonna get back to what it is and there's
01:27:08
no way I mean you built it all up
01:27:11
I've started again and it's way more
01:27:13
satisfying this time because I know a
01:27:15
lot more
01:27:16
than what I did admittedly I wouldn't
01:27:17
have loved to give away a 2000 square
01:27:19
meter property out in New London I could
01:27:22
have sold to a developer for 50 100
01:27:25
million but hey what I mean what do you
01:27:28
do you mean you can't just dwell on that
01:27:29
sort of stuff so experience is Big it's
01:27:31
it's huge in terms of
01:27:34
um the space that I'm in
01:27:36
um you know both on you know on the
01:27:38
rugby pitch and also you know the
01:27:40
financial stuff that I'm doing yeah well
01:27:42
I I can't wait to see what your next
01:27:43
mistake is
01:27:46
not more no no no
01:27:48
yeah yeah mistakes as long as you learn
01:27:51
from the market I think they're fine but
01:27:52
and and uh I say okay I kind of mean
01:27:55
that in a way like your next mistake
01:27:56
it's not going to be something alcohol
01:27:57
related because I feel like you've
01:27:59
you've completely learned every lesson
01:28:01
there is to to be learned there yeah so
01:28:03
I I yeah I suppose good and bad I can't
01:28:06
wait to see what's next in the middle
01:28:07
story yeah I mean what a life I know it
01:28:10
has I mean ah this is probably the most
01:28:12
I've ever reflected back on anything
01:28:15
I've done so I thank you Dom for uh
01:28:17
inviting me in into this uh space and
01:28:21
talk about myself because it's not
01:28:22
something I've ever done before I can
01:28:24
tell I can tell I can tell it's um it's
01:28:28
a shame in a way because um you've got
01:28:29
so many stories to tell and uh you know
01:28:32
if the time comes where you you change
01:28:34
your mind and you want to be a bit more
01:28:35
public I know there's um you know you do
01:28:37
very well on the public speaking circuit
01:28:39
you've got a lot of lessons and a lot of
01:28:41
people can learn a lot of stuff from you
01:28:42
yeah
01:28:44
actually actually listens then just just
01:28:46
[ __ ] good memories too yeah and I
01:28:49
think that's the thing like [ __ ] you
01:28:50
just
01:28:51
if I get some of those memories because
01:28:53
you don't go back and reflect on it man
01:28:55
there's there's so many of the really
01:28:58
good stuff that you could just kind of
01:28:59
because you've parked that side of your
01:29:01
life away and You're gonna laugh like
01:29:02
what is what I've done with that life
01:29:04
you know it's all Swedish but when you
01:29:07
remember like actually yeah that's right
01:29:08
and that's what happened that way that's
01:29:10
what's happened that's what I was like
01:29:11
even the stuff that I've spoken to you
01:29:13
about there's so much funny [ __ ] that
01:29:15
happened during that time
01:29:16
that probably made things a lot easier
01:29:19
too it probably doesn't seem like it at
01:29:20
the top yeah yeah what what are you in
01:29:22
something like that's going on I suppose
01:29:23
it's like all consuming so yeah yeah
01:29:26
yeah but anyway um my friend daggy who's
01:29:29
filming this he just bought in a note
01:29:30
saying um 34 tries
01:29:33
which puts you in the top 30 in uh and
01:29:36
World rugby oh really oh I didn't know
01:29:38
that oh mate is it World rugby or just
01:29:40
all blacks
01:29:43
in the world rugby
01:29:45
should have been more greedy
01:29:48
together all right hey Millers milliona
01:29:51
thank you so much man I've really really
01:29:53
enjoyed it it's been awesome and um
01:29:54
thanks for being so open and so
01:29:56
vulnerable thanks again if you don't
01:29:57
pleasure
01:29:58
[Music]

Podspun Insights

In this episode, Dom Harvey welcomes the charismatic Mills Muliaina, a former All Black and now a mortgage broker, for a captivating conversation that dives deep into Mills' life journey. The episode kicks off with a light-hearted admission from Dom about losing his notes, setting the tone for an engaging and candid chat. Mills shares his unexpected transition from rugby to the world of finance, revealing how his passion for property investment blossomed during his playing days. As they reminisce about Mills' early career, listeners are treated to anecdotes about his humble beginnings, the challenges of growing up in a large family, and the lessons learned from his financial missteps.

The conversation takes a more serious turn as Mills opens up about the pressures of fame, the mistakes he made in his youth, and the resilience he developed through adversity. His reflections on personal growth and the importance of learning from failures resonate deeply, making this episode not just entertaining but also profoundly inspiring. Mills discusses the significance of supporting his community, particularly in educating others about financial literacy, and how his past experiences shape his current endeavors.

With a blend of humor and sincerity, this episode captures the essence of Mills Muliaina—not just as a sports icon but as a relatable human being navigating the complexities of life. Listeners are left with a sense of hope and motivation, inspired by Mills' journey of transformation and his commitment to making a positive impact.

Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

  • 95
    Most inspiring
  • 92
    Best overall
  • 90
    Most emotional
  • 90
    Most quotable

Episode Highlights

  • From Rugby to Real Estate
    Transitioning from a rugby career to becoming a successful mortgage broker.
    “I’ve always had an interest in purchasing houses.”
    @ 01m 47s
    July 08, 2023
  • Life After Rugby
    Discussing the challenges and changes after retiring from professional sports.
    “I love what I’m doing now.”
    @ 08m 19s
    July 08, 2023
  • Overcoming Adversity
    Reflecting on personal challenges and growth throughout his career.
    “Falling off the wagon a little bit, but I jump myself back on.”
    @ 17m 51s
    July 08, 2023
  • Learning from Failure
    Reflecting on how failures provide valuable lessons for growth.
    “Your failure is actually not a bad thing.”
    @ 40m 32s
    July 08, 2023
  • Resilience in Adversity
    The importance of bouncing back from challenges and mistakes.
    “You learn everything from your fails.”
    @ 40m 37s
    July 08, 2023
  • Family Support
    The emotional impact of family during tough times.
    “I know deep down inside I know you’re really hurting.”
    @ 42m 35s
    July 08, 2023
  • Stigma of Accusation
    The harsh reality of being labeled as a sex offender.
    “It’s like you’ve been painted now as this guy sex offender.”
    @ 52m 06s
    July 08, 2023
  • Navigating Vulnerability
    Understanding the consequences of choices and living with the weight of public perception.
    “You are a target, whether you like it or not.”
    @ 54m 02s
    July 08, 2023
  • Life's Ups and Downs
    Reflecting on the highs and lows of life and the importance of moving forward.
    “Life is flat and boring, with real highs and lows in between.”
    @ 01h 05m 07s
    July 08, 2023
  • Letting Go of Grudges
    The importance of not holding onto anger and moving forward positively.
    “Holding a grudge is just wasted energy.”
    @ 01h 05m 52s
    July 08, 2023
  • Commentating at the World Cup
    He shares his excitement about commentating at the Rugby World Cup.
    “I never in my wildest dreams thought I’d be commentating.”
    @ 01h 19m 58s
    July 08, 2023
  • Life Lessons from Experience
    He discusses how experiences shape his current life and business.
    “Experience is big; it’s huge in terms of the space I’m in.”
    @ 01h 27m 31s
    July 08, 2023

Episode Quotes

Key Moments

  • Unprepared Podcast00:35
  • Life After Rugby08:19
  • Life Lessons40:32
  • Forgiveness1:05:52
  • Life Balance1:20:54
  • Co-Parenting Challenges1:24:15
  • Lessons Learned1:26:01
  • Top Rugby Achievement1:29:30

Words per Minute Over Time

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