00:00:00
okay Runners only with dime Harley
00:00:02
's only with Don Harvey and the
00:00:06
legendary die inward g'day mate oh get a
00:00:08
legendary I love it
00:00:10
well I I mean I was doing some research
00:00:13
yesterday and I was thinking about
00:00:14
um how long I've known you and and you
00:00:17
are a religion yeah by the way I've seen
00:00:19
your research I like it looks very Hefty
00:00:22
but you've also double spaced it like I
00:00:24
used to back in school to make my essay
00:00:26
seem longer I did 50 last week so I need
00:00:29
a Big Font otherwise I Gotta Wear the
00:00:31
glass no I remember I remember meeting
00:00:33
you yeah you know back in the old old
00:00:37
Radio Days promoting various um
00:00:40
shows for comedy festivals and that I
00:00:42
think it seems like I've been around for
00:00:44
ages because I started pretty young
00:00:47
um 1997 was when I started doing comedy
00:00:50
and I would have been
00:00:52
um yeah 19. no 18 then yeah with some
00:00:55
thick black hair like the shiniest black
00:00:58
hair imaginable I had swim through an
00:01:01
oil yeah I had I really had a lot of I
00:01:05
was always very hirsute I had um my eyes
00:01:09
full guide School eyebrows joined in the
00:01:11
middle and they and they joined my hair
00:01:14
line and um so yeah no but to prove it I
00:01:18
shaved my head except for a sweatband
00:01:21
appear because you know I was always the
00:01:23
one if you're gonna be mocked you've got
00:01:25
to lean into it and Own It Well my my
00:01:29
first memory of you I'm not sure if this
00:01:30
is the first time we met but I think it
00:01:32
is
00:01:33
um it was the age breakfast show with JJ
00:01:36
Mike and Dom we were trying to work at a
00:01:39
different level to other shows so we we
00:01:41
when we had Comedians and we're trying
00:01:43
to rip off the format of you know
00:01:45
Letterman and Leno and we'd say to say
00:01:47
archbarker give us a leading question
00:01:49
and you can give us some of your routine
00:01:51
and comedians were notoriously
00:01:53
protective about their material so we'd
00:01:56
want to say to her something like oh how
00:01:58
was the flight over and he'd be like oh
00:01:59
let me tell you about airline food yeah
00:02:02
the comedians were so predictive about
00:02:04
their routine and we'd be like you need
00:02:06
to understand it's like if we just give
00:02:08
the dates of your show people aren't
00:02:10
going to buy them they need to think
00:02:11
this guy's funny where can I see them
00:02:12
and then you came in you had a CD with
00:02:16
an instrumental on and you you wrapped
00:02:18
as um this character you were doing at
00:02:20
the time P-Funk chainsaw yeah and you
00:02:23
walked out and we were just blown away
00:02:24
we're like this guy's the [ __ ] deal
00:02:25
this guy's prepared he's organized he's
00:02:28
funny so I um I have
00:02:32
it's it's like I understand why
00:02:35
um Comics do that but then
00:02:39
what I don't understand is you you're
00:02:42
selling a show you're going on to do PR
00:02:45
for your show so you know a lot of
00:02:48
people can come in and then be a bit
00:02:49
Sullen they're not answering questions
00:02:51
properly they don't feel like they want
00:02:53
to be there and it's like this is my
00:02:55
chance man
00:02:56
yeah I gotta get out there and also
00:02:59
people are listening if they go oh he's
00:03:01
funny or he's that's different I'll go
00:03:03
and see that show so also I think
00:03:05
happened to be going out with publicists
00:03:08
help
00:03:10
who will I um and also I I myself come
00:03:15
from a radio background in terms of the
00:03:18
fact that I um was early and radioactive
00:03:22
down in Wellington
00:03:24
um then when I moved up to Auckland I
00:03:26
did like an arts and culture show on
00:03:28
George FM when that was just a little
00:03:30
tiny thing on Vermont Street in ponsonby
00:03:33
um
00:03:35
bits and Bobs and Commercial radio so I
00:03:38
was aware that you've got you've got to
00:03:41
have content and I it also made it fun
00:03:45
coming in because when I put effort into
00:03:48
to to an interview then the next time
00:03:51
I'd come in people are like are way more
00:03:53
relaxed because they're like oh sweet
00:03:55
he's bringing something to the table I
00:03:58
feel like yeah you've just had a level
00:03:59
of professionalism before anyone else
00:04:01
and something I've always respected
00:04:03
that's what my dad taught me because I I
00:04:05
grew up in a theater and he was always
00:04:07
look you've it's a job it is a job so
00:04:11
you've got to work at it you've got to
00:04:13
prepare at it and also a thing he
00:04:16
taught me which I think has really
00:04:19
stayed with me is that people actually
00:04:22
have quite similar set of skills if you
00:04:24
get to a point in an industry where
00:04:27
you've moved up a bit people have a very
00:04:29
similar set of skills so if you're easy
00:04:32
to work with and professional you'll
00:04:35
often get the job over other people
00:04:37
because you know if you're hiring
00:04:39
someone you go oh they're really fun to
00:04:41
work with and they're real Divas
00:04:43
we'll go
00:04:45
and also it's New Zealand word gets
00:04:49
around you know even in competing radio
00:04:52
stations everyone to a point is mate so
00:04:55
if it gets around that you're easy and
00:04:58
look how many I don't even want to count
00:05:01
how many voice breaks you've probably
00:05:02
done right I couldn't count either but
00:05:05
if you have a guest who comes in
00:05:08
a regularly and you go right we don't
00:05:11
actually need to prep that much they
00:05:13
deliver we'll probably get one more
00:05:16
Voice break out of this than we're
00:05:17
hoping that's gold yeah you know because
00:05:20
then you it's not okay well we don't
00:05:23
know how this interview is going to go
00:05:25
we've got two voice breaks but they
00:05:27
might clam up you know we've got to but
00:05:30
if you can sort of look through your
00:05:31
morning rundown and go right Tic Tac
00:05:34
toys we're gonna caught him and plug two
00:05:37
brakes yeah that's what it was it was
00:05:39
like plugging brakes and radio yeah well
00:05:41
so now we're recording this in um early
00:05:44
February 2023 you turned 45 on Tuesday
00:05:47
happy birthday thank you very much um
00:05:49
dude this might seem like a weird
00:05:51
question but do birthdays feel different
00:05:53
now with your diagnosis
00:05:57
I've never been a massive
00:06:00
birthday person like they sort of Mark
00:06:03
do Mark time and I've I'm in
00:06:08
an extrovert on stage but still quite an
00:06:11
introverts
00:06:12
um and this year I thought I'd have a
00:06:14
bigger party
00:06:16
we've got a family place out at Piha by
00:06:18
the beach and um I've had over the last
00:06:20
three years
00:06:21
have been private with my diagnosis
00:06:25
people sort of knew here and there but
00:06:27
I've had a quite a staunch group of
00:06:30
around 30 so I wanted to show them some
00:06:32
love and put on some Kai for them
00:06:35
and and had a party and it was
00:06:38
a bit different because
00:06:41
um
00:06:41
when you'd start putting the clock on
00:06:44
things a bit more of or not put putting
00:06:47
the clock because I don't know how much
00:06:48
time I have I might have heaps I might
00:06:50
not
00:06:51
um
00:06:53
just being aware of that clock does make
00:06:56
moments stand out a bit more and it was
00:06:58
just it was awesome you know and I am I
00:07:02
I really love turning 45 I think I
00:07:06
actually think um
00:07:08
even though even though my 40s has been
00:07:11
a bit of a shambles on the health run
00:07:13
and not a shambles it's it's been
00:07:16
dealing with some heavy stuff it's
00:07:18
actually the um the happiest of being
00:07:22
and the most grounded I've been so now
00:07:24
it was an awesome birthday what do you
00:07:26
think that is
00:07:27
um just more like more you're more
00:07:29
mindful more appreciative yeah I'm more
00:07:31
I sort of feel like I've figured
00:07:35
what life is out like I've figured it
00:07:40
out and um I mean now I am back in the
00:07:44
day I I used to go to Japan
00:07:48
quite a lot from when I was 13 my dad
00:07:50
toured Phantom of the Opera not the
00:07:52
Andrew Lloyd Webber Phantom of the Opera
00:07:54
there was one was there another one yeah
00:07:56
written by Ken Hill it was actually
00:07:58
written before Andrew Lloyd Webber same
00:08:00
storyline okay and he had two of that
00:08:02
around Japan and I'd go over I went over
00:08:06
a couple of times with them and um one
00:08:08
of the one of the actors was a Buddhist
00:08:10
and and I had a real I've always had an
00:08:14
interest in
00:08:16
um
00:08:17
sort of spirituality I've been allergic
00:08:20
to organized religion but something
00:08:22
about spirituality and um she took me to
00:08:26
uh uh zazin Temple and I learned as in
00:08:29
meditation and all that and um that's
00:08:32
recently just massively come back into
00:08:35
my life and um I just I I sort of feel
00:08:39
way more connected to everyone I don't
00:08:43
have the the I've sort of dropped any
00:08:46
hassle and I just like taking what comes
00:08:50
along and and living life I thought you
00:08:52
were like that so you've been living
00:08:54
with this um
00:08:55
I feel like there's an easy time stamp
00:08:57
you can put on it you've been basically
00:08:58
dealing with this since the beginning of
00:09:00
the pandemic so earlier it was like
00:09:02
April I was April 2020 so we went into
00:09:05
lockdown what March
00:09:07
um
00:09:08
and the hardest thing is before that the
00:09:11
the year before that in August my father
00:09:14
passed away he had had an 18 months of
00:09:17
dealing with sort of stroke stroke
00:09:19
induce dementia which
00:09:22
um was uh really really hard I am
00:09:28
I remember actually one of the first
00:09:30
times that had clipped for me I was
00:09:32
doing a radio interview and they had
00:09:34
they'd sort of be funny to ring up my
00:09:36
dad and
00:09:38
to sort of have a what station wasn't
00:09:40
the edge was it I have a back and forth
00:09:42
and
00:09:45
um
00:09:45
and then just it was during that I went
00:09:48
[ __ ] dad's not quite right there yeah no
00:09:52
just not yeah just different and missing
00:09:54
a couple of things and then it was like
00:09:57
um oh wow that
00:09:59
that it um something's up there then I
00:10:02
took him to like a rugby game and we'd
00:10:04
scored these lovely tickets in a box and
00:10:06
there are a couple of X all blacks from
00:10:08
when I was a kid sort of in days dad's
00:10:11
Heyday and like he's not recognizing
00:10:14
sort of these old old school all black
00:10:17
Legends and I was like oh this is
00:10:19
something's a bit weird there's so so
00:10:21
it's dealing with that then dad passed
00:10:23
away and then sort of a few months later
00:10:26
and I'm an only child so it meant
00:10:30
um mum and I sort of were were pillars
00:10:33
for each other
00:10:34
there wasn't a wider family to share
00:10:36
that with and um
00:10:39
and then cancer diagnosis came along at
00:10:42
the same time I got funding for a
00:10:44
lockdown TV show that I was shooting in
00:10:47
my garage with where I was a camera
00:10:50
person my son who was seven at the time
00:10:53
he was trying to run the camera
00:10:55
it was awesome because it was a real
00:10:59
a real kiwi number eight wire show that
00:11:03
the time of lockdown absolutely
00:11:06
yeah completely but at that same time I
00:11:10
was going through
00:11:12
figuring out I I had bowel cancer or
00:11:14
colorectal cancer as they call it and it
00:11:16
was in my bowel and on my liver this is
00:11:19
the one thing about cancer I hadn't
00:11:21
figured out you have so now I have bowel
00:11:24
cancer but it's only in my lungs it's
00:11:26
not in my bowel I'd never thought so
00:11:29
when it changes it's still the same
00:11:31
cancer yeah you think lung if it's in
00:11:33
your lung it's lung cancer yeah but so
00:11:35
so it sort of has had spread and
00:11:38
I knew nothing about cancer I've had no
00:11:41
cancer in our family so I was like what
00:11:46
I suddenly just chucked into this
00:11:49
learning curve and we suddenly I've
00:11:52
always been very
00:11:55
um Hands-On with my own life and very
00:11:58
responsible for my own life and then I
00:12:01
was chucked into this situation where it
00:12:03
was I have to lean on
00:12:05
people who know things and so who I've
00:12:09
got I suddenly went from having no
00:12:11
doctors in my contacts list and now like
00:12:14
I've got so many specialists frequently
00:12:17
called numbers so many specialists in
00:12:20
that
00:12:21
um and then it was just scans straight
00:12:24
into chemotherapy I didn't even know how
00:12:27
you did chemotherapy I had to get a port
00:12:29
which I've still got in my chest that
00:12:31
connects to an arterial line and they
00:12:33
sort of jab you at like Pulp Fiction to
00:12:36
plug you in and um I was scared of
00:12:39
chemotherapy just from TV it wouldn't be
00:12:42
just from TV though because I was like
00:12:45
everyone on TV shows is staggering
00:12:48
around with a bandana and yeah bald thin
00:12:51
pale sick looking yeah very frail and
00:12:53
vomiting yeah non-stop for days on end
00:12:56
and I'm not saying it's it's much
00:12:59
different to that because it's really
00:13:01
hard and um
00:13:03
so I went into chemo but then I had to
00:13:06
learn I went like I'm a learner I've
00:13:09
always been intrigued with back in the
00:13:12
day I suppose it was like fads you know
00:13:14
like I was very early on to your Wim Hof
00:13:18
ice bath thing and he was out early you
00:13:21
know back in the day used to come to
00:13:22
Tauranga and just go and sit in the
00:13:24
streams yeah so like a dirty come mate
00:13:27
when half and I and I went down but I
00:13:30
missed him it was and so I was big into
00:13:32
your ice baths I was beginning to
00:13:33
breathing techniques and so I went right
00:13:37
I've got to start researching and um
00:13:40
I've I've
00:13:42
I think people who aren't passive
00:13:45
patients for anything have better
00:13:48
outcomes so instead of just well you
00:13:51
mean more engaged and yeah who I'm just
00:13:53
I walk and I sit down I listen to
00:13:56
this so they say do this I do that right
00:13:59
spring as proactive as you can yeah of
00:14:01
learning okay now
00:14:03
chemo what what are we trying to achieve
00:14:06
with chemo because chemo doesn't cure
00:14:08
cancer no oncologist ever claims chemo
00:14:11
cures cancer it's a tool and trying to
00:14:14
you're trying to reduce all the tumor
00:14:16
load basically and then cut it out or
00:14:18
fingers crossed your body figures out
00:14:21
how to do it I feel like that's um
00:14:23
that's a good attitude you've got
00:14:24
because it's like you're the CEO of your
00:14:26
own body right yeah and so I went at the
00:14:28
end of the day it comes down to me I so
00:14:31
I was like how do I make my body as
00:14:34
healthy as I can to do chemo how what
00:14:38
tools can I use to tolerate chemo better
00:14:41
so then I just started researching
00:14:45
reading all scientific papers I could
00:14:48
sort of unfortunately with something
00:14:51
like cancer there's a lot of snake oil
00:14:54
that comes along with it I I put that
00:14:56
down to the fact that no one knows where
00:14:58
cancer comes from no one knows how to
00:15:00
cure cancer properly so
00:15:03
I was out of desperation people are
00:15:05
trying anything exactly so I
00:15:09
you have to start being very wary of
00:15:11
sources and that and there's a lot of
00:15:14
good info out there and so I was like I
00:15:17
stumbled across thing like okay if you
00:15:20
fasted in in and out of chemo it made
00:15:23
you tolerate it better and it had more
00:15:26
efficacy
00:15:28
so I mean I'll give that a bash and then
00:15:30
I went [ __ ] this actually massively
00:15:32
helped me deal with chemo and there were
00:15:36
some studies behind it and I'd sort of
00:15:37
show my oncologist the studies and go to
00:15:40
me this says I should do it what am I
00:15:43
missing like I obviously can't I'm not
00:15:45
trying to read these and it it sort of
00:15:49
has been so supportive and also that
00:15:51
thing of if it's not toxic and it's not
00:15:55
gonna hurt the treatment I'm doing then
00:15:57
I'll give it a go and then I went from
00:16:01
chemo to got almost half my liver
00:16:04
removed
00:16:05
I got my bowel half a huge section of my
00:16:09
bowel taken out and I had an ileostomy
00:16:11
bag which is a
00:16:13
people mainly know colonoscopy so
00:16:16
ileostomy bags the exact same principle
00:16:19
just on a different part of your bowel
00:16:21
so you still have that now or no do they
00:16:23
no so I had that for three months and
00:16:26
then while about where this they Stitch
00:16:30
the Bell together sort of reconnects
00:16:34
um and then got it reversed but while I
00:16:37
was getting it in that they found some
00:16:39
stuff in my lungs
00:16:41
on which I just they rang me on my
00:16:44
birthday I remember it I'd taken my door
00:16:48
my daughter who she's six now she's four
00:16:51
she'll like staying in a hotel over then
00:16:54
overnight was amazing so we I took her
00:16:56
to a hotel and we stayed overnight and
00:16:58
had pizza and we'd just gone for a swim
00:17:01
and came back and get a call and then
00:17:03
Hayward found three
00:17:05
you're all clear but we've found three
00:17:07
subjects in your lung just you and your
00:17:10
daughter in the hotel not yeah no just
00:17:12
me and my my daughter we're having a
00:17:14
daddy daughter thing and then I was do
00:17:16
you managed to like keep a brave face on
00:17:18
for her or like yeah that sort of just
00:17:21
put me in a spin because that was in the
00:17:23
moment every
00:17:26
with cancer there's never any there's
00:17:29
nothing's black or white there's never
00:17:31
good news or bad news everything is gray
00:17:34
everything has so it's like we've found
00:17:38
these three spots but we can
00:17:40
where they are we can operate so then
00:17:44
when I had my bow removed I had one lung
00:17:47
operation then I went back a month later
00:17:51
in hand another lung operation like
00:17:53
luckily due to my
00:17:56
um breath work and everything I had
00:17:58
sturdy lungs and and I I tolerated the
00:18:02
the the
00:18:04
um the surgery as well and then sort of
00:18:08
came out and then
00:18:10
in September just before we went into
00:18:12
that weird lockdown you know oh yeah
00:18:14
yeah yeah one that went up to Christmas
00:18:16
where only Auckland was in it I was in
00:18:19
between 2021 yeah yeah I was clear I it
00:18:21
was all clear
00:18:23
and I was like wow this is awesome then
00:18:25
my blood started going weird in December
00:18:28
and then
00:18:30
uh last year in May they found another
00:18:35
spot which I got taken off and then I
00:18:38
had a break and I thought things were
00:18:39
going well and then they found 10 more
00:18:42
tumors in my lungs
00:18:44
um and one against a lymph node in my
00:18:46
pipe and my windpipe and they were like
00:18:49
well we can't
00:18:51
actually we can't operate on this too
00:18:54
many to operate on I mean you could take
00:18:56
a whole lung out but then that actually
00:18:58
causes more
00:19:01
that will impact my life more than at
00:19:04
the moment yeah having them there so I
00:19:06
went back into chemo which was so
00:19:08
confronting because it was a thing I
00:19:10
didn't want to do because chemo is
00:19:12
really full-on
00:19:14
um so they um they inject you with it
00:19:17
right yes you get plugged in on your
00:19:20
chest and then I sit in there in the the
00:19:24
hospital for about four hours four to
00:19:27
five hours then I'd take it away and a
00:19:29
baby's bottle on a bum bag for two days
00:19:32
where you just sort of cruise around
00:19:34
Finland
00:19:35
I bet
00:19:37
um worked out and yeah what's it what's
00:19:40
it is there anything you can compare it
00:19:42
to us it's like having a brutal hangover
00:19:45
right it's a brutal hangover which is a
00:19:48
similar I think it's similar because
00:19:51
it's your liver your liver is processing
00:19:54
all this poison
00:19:56
and um so the ones the only thing that
00:20:01
really got me through was THC and
00:20:04
medicinal cannabis because it's like um
00:20:08
what it's proven to have
00:20:12
um in terms of efficacy of helping chemo
00:20:15
of helping you tolerate chemo
00:20:18
um it helped me amazingly through my
00:20:20
surgeries because I can't take opioids
00:20:22
like Tramadol and that they just they
00:20:25
react badly yeah I get really upset
00:20:27
stomach and constipation and all that so
00:20:30
I was blessed to um sort of discover
00:20:35
um not like I discovered weed I've lived
00:20:37
in New Zealand I've recreationally used
00:20:40
it but um then actually discovering and
00:20:44
medicinal qualities yeah and using it
00:20:47
medicinally rather than
00:20:49
um just recreationally so that massively
00:20:52
helped and then it was for me it was
00:20:54
just working on mindset the whole time
00:20:57
working on mindset and um
00:21:00
and trying to because the thing is what
00:21:04
the the things I know that you can you
00:21:06
can help is basically
00:21:09
um exercise diet sleep
00:21:13
and meditation and things as I feel like
00:21:17
um you were doing all that stuff pre the
00:21:19
diagnosis I mean for a couple of years I
00:21:21
feel like there was a transition in your
00:21:22
life there was uh you're doing all that
00:21:25
stuff I got I basically spent 10 years
00:21:29
trying to get sober and then I got sober
00:21:31
in 2019 and
00:21:33
um I I'd been transitioning that way
00:21:36
I've been I've always the thing was I've
00:21:40
always been relatively fit and that's
00:21:43
where a lot of anger came in because I'd
00:21:45
be out and see people who are morbidly
00:21:48
obese smoking ciggies and smashing a pie
00:21:52
and I'm like
00:21:56
I've had my hard times and my party
00:21:58
times but not
00:22:01
drastically more than other people you
00:22:03
know moderation yeah not not drastically
00:22:06
more than other people so there was a
00:22:07
lot of anger that I had to deal with
00:22:11
um and I'm a classic passive aggressive
00:22:13
Kiwi from back in the day you know I
00:22:16
didn't let my anger out or just Bubble
00:22:18
Up in weird ways like hey I don't see
00:22:21
that in you at all I had it quite well
00:22:23
yeah I definitely had a passive
00:22:25
aggressive sort of side and I was never
00:22:27
when I was a booze or a party I was
00:22:30
never aggressive I was full party guy
00:22:32
which sort of was detrimental in a way
00:22:35
because then people don't see that you
00:22:37
could be suffering with a booze issue
00:22:40
yeah right and um
00:22:42
and I started to get all my emotions
00:22:46
under check and I wasn't getting angry I
00:22:49
was meditating more I was bringing more
00:22:52
meditation I suppose to everyday life
00:22:54
and that the hardest thing is Oh no
00:22:57
you're a runner I was
00:22:59
loving my running as status yeah even
00:23:03
the Queenstown Marathon yeah I love the
00:23:06
Queenstown Marathon I sort of um I've
00:23:08
done two half marathons and then um you
00:23:12
know I was still running half marathon
00:23:15
it's quite regularly just in training
00:23:17
and I was always sort of under two hours
00:23:20
as
00:23:22
um you know so I was at a nice place and
00:23:23
I was at that point where I was like
00:23:24
well I'm regularly I'm getting under two
00:23:27
hours now I could really
00:23:29
push for a quicker half marathon maybe I
00:23:33
will try a marathon
00:23:35
and um and then just with chemo the
00:23:39
running just I couldn't run yeah is that
00:23:43
so it was just so then I had to realize
00:23:46
actually I'm trying to exercise too hard
00:23:49
out I need to just
00:23:52
do everything slowly you know like
00:23:55
instead of doing I was um before my
00:23:58
diagnosis I I was having this amazing
00:24:01
time training um with Monty batham and
00:24:04
his sort of he had a small group of
00:24:06
people he was really training up and it
00:24:08
was just hardcore exercise boxing
00:24:10
physical cardio weights a bit of
00:24:13
everything and then I was like I've got
00:24:15
to do the opposite of this I've got to
00:24:18
work out slowly so I was like walking or
00:24:21
like so
00:24:24
instead of going around under 100
00:24:26
push-ups today I'm gonna do 20 slow
00:24:30
perfect push-ups oh and I can't touch my
00:24:34
toes properly I'm gonna get to a point
00:24:36
where I can squat
00:24:39
um in a full deep squat for five minutes
00:24:41
sort of you know like you'd see in
00:24:44
Indonesia or something how
00:24:46
um those sort of cultures just squat the
00:24:49
whole time yeah so it's like I'm gonna
00:24:51
learn to squat I'm gonna really work on
00:24:53
my knees there was a guy knees over
00:24:56
there oh very familiar with knees so in
00:24:59
knees over toes guys so I started
00:25:01
adopting a few of those and I'm went I'm
00:25:04
gonna go for mobility and strength slow
00:25:09
strength and that and that sort of
00:25:12
really worked and walking like do an
00:25:15
hour walk a day
00:25:17
um which is a blessed Bliss we got a dog
00:25:20
just after my diagnosis and I've never
00:25:23
been a animal person I mean I've had two
00:25:26
fish and a turtle in my tongue yeah fish
00:25:30
don't count yeah why why why what was
00:25:32
the decision to get a dog
00:25:34
my wife loved dogs the kids sort of
00:25:37
wanted a dog it was the perfect so it
00:25:40
was nothing to do with the diagnosis it
00:25:41
was no it sort of was a little bit and
00:25:44
it was um it was the perfect distraction
00:25:46
and
00:25:48
um animals like I mean there's there's
00:25:51
so much proof and with animals of just
00:25:55
patting them hanging out with them how
00:25:57
much it helps oh it's so cathartic your
00:26:00
body as well so and that also means when
00:26:03
I didn't feel like going for a walk I
00:26:05
was like oh I've got a the dog's gotta
00:26:06
have a walk and then once you're out
00:26:08
you'd know it was running so many times
00:26:11
you're on the borderline of maybe not
00:26:13
wanting to but once you actually get a
00:26:15
few k's under your belt you're happy you
00:26:16
went out oh yeah the endorphins yeah you
00:26:18
never regret going out for a run no so
00:26:20
I'd take the dog out for an hour
00:26:22
um and then I'd just work where I could
00:26:25
on on my um
00:26:27
on my fitness and then I read this
00:26:30
amazing book by this guy called Tim
00:26:32
Baker who he is a a surfer he's a
00:26:36
professional surf writer
00:26:39
um and he got stage four prostate cancer
00:26:42
and prostate cancer is a whole another
00:26:45
kettle of fish because they have to
00:26:47
remove all the testosterone from your
00:26:49
body you basically get chemically
00:26:51
castrated it's a bit almost similar to
00:26:56
um if you're going through transition
00:26:59
um so and he got it quite young so it's
00:27:01
quite confronting for a young guy to
00:27:04
have the testosterone removed it creates
00:27:06
a lot of because it's diffusion yeah and
00:27:09
a lot of hormonal imbalance and stuff so
00:27:12
he wrote this book and he said just
00:27:14
focus on your meds which was meditation
00:27:17
exercise diet and sleep and it's a
00:27:20
really confronting book but it gave me
00:27:23
so much power is it because it's like
00:27:26
focusing on the things you can control
00:27:28
yeah and he he he's a big proponent for
00:27:32
integrative oncology which there isn't a
00:27:35
lot of which is about empowering people
00:27:38
with
00:27:39
um knowledge around nutrition knowledge
00:27:42
around spiritual practices which
00:27:46
traditionally Western medicine has
00:27:48
stepped away from because it's very hard
00:27:51
to prove new is you can't prove
00:27:55
nutrition's role in a way
00:27:58
in cancer because it's very hard to
00:28:02
study nutrition because people lie about
00:28:04
what they eat and so forth so
00:28:07
I I just took that on board that really
00:28:11
helped me then I was like I need to get
00:28:13
I need to be public this was nagging
00:28:16
away at me and I never wanted to go
00:28:18
public early in my diagnosis because it
00:28:20
wasn't I didn't want to cry and thing
00:28:24
that was about the cancer I wanted to
00:28:27
get get it out there in a way to show
00:28:30
people I'm living with cancer yeah I
00:28:33
wanted to want to ask you about that
00:28:35
because the day we're recording this it
00:28:36
was exactly two weeks ago that the um
00:28:39
incredible interview that you did with
00:28:41
Jackie Brown on the project uh went out
00:28:43
so it was like five minutes of TV time
00:28:45
and then a 45 minute clip on YouTube
00:28:47
which um I've watched twice and it's a
00:28:50
have you watched it it's a hard [ __ ]
00:28:51
watch yeah it's you I mean Jack is a
00:28:55
good friend of yours she did a good job
00:28:56
at just your
00:28:58
vulnerability and just complete
00:29:00
transparency it was yeah it's the that
00:29:03
was the hardest thing in terms of
00:29:06
um coming out to talk about it because
00:29:09
I'm
00:29:10
I've always been I don't know whether
00:29:12
this is a comedian thing or I'm quite
00:29:16
transparent and quite authentic so my
00:29:19
thing is once I got going on the
00:29:21
interview I couldn't really hide
00:29:23
anything the hiding things is not is not
00:29:26
me and that's also part of why I started
00:29:29
to um want to be more public with it was
00:29:33
because
00:29:34
I do stand up I do corporate talks and
00:29:39
that no it was like there was this a big
00:29:41
part of your life that this elephant in
00:29:43
the room that I'm not talking about and
00:29:44
I'm just sort of mucking around and then
00:29:46
I was like actually if I added this into
00:29:48
my talks
00:29:50
I could really help people because
00:29:52
there's all these tools that I'm using
00:29:55
that could translate to
00:29:57
different not to mention from a person I
00:30:00
speak of massive weight off your
00:30:01
shoulders as well and can I say like you
00:30:04
you I don't know if I think this is a
00:30:06
good thing but I don't know you were a
00:30:08
very good mask I I listened to some uh
00:30:11
podcasts you did yesterday including one
00:30:13
you did with Kylie Flynn and she asked
00:30:15
some some questions that she asked all
00:30:16
her guests like what your bucket list
00:30:18
item is yeah she's probably and she
00:30:21
shouldn't be but she's probably
00:30:22
mortified about that now and she asks
00:30:24
what's one thing you've never told
00:30:25
another person and in the back of your
00:30:28
mind you must have been thinking [ __ ]
00:30:30
yeah well the thing is Carly knew oh did
00:30:32
she yeah because I I had just come out
00:30:35
of hospital I was maybe three days out
00:30:38
of hospital from lung surgery when I did
00:30:40
that interview
00:30:41
um I think that the thing is
00:30:44
also I have pretty much
00:30:47
I've been very blessed to look very
00:30:50
healthy through this whole thing yeah
00:30:52
you look great today so I did I was
00:30:55
doing seven days while I was doing chemo
00:30:58
I had chemo attached to me and I was
00:31:02
doing seven days
00:31:04
um uh so
00:31:06
I think because I just I get some I love
00:31:09
doing comedy and I was at my job was it
00:31:12
like a nice distraction yeah it was
00:31:14
because there is a day in there when
00:31:16
you're doing Chemo when you actually
00:31:18
feel okay well I felt okay I could never
00:31:21
talk for anyone who's going through
00:31:23
anything like that
00:31:25
um but
00:31:26
it worked for me it was a coping thing
00:31:28
for me and um I I just didn't feel at
00:31:32
those times I didn't feel
00:31:35
um
00:31:36
that I wanted to talk about it it felt
00:31:40
too personal for me it also is something
00:31:43
that a diagnosis like this is just as
00:31:46
heavy I believe on a partner as it is on
00:31:48
me so any going public affects my wife
00:31:52
we're sort of quite we've got a quite a
00:31:55
private little family yeah you are you
00:31:57
are um and and then it just suddenly
00:32:01
felt right in about December last year I
00:32:04
was actually I think it's time
00:32:06
to to go public and then it was sort of
00:32:09
working out the timing of it and all
00:32:11
that sort of carry on because I mean I I
00:32:14
have been the amount of messages
00:32:17
I've got I've just been blown away by so
00:32:21
many positive ones just an outpouring of
00:32:23
Love yeah the odd one that is this just
00:32:25
proves you're a shell for Jacinda which
00:32:28
I don't quite
00:32:30
I don't quite know how you draw that bow
00:32:33
from watching that but some people are
00:32:35
some people
00:32:36
um but like 99 of
00:32:40
um of but I'm not you can't be surprised
00:32:44
I'm not surprised you can't be surprised
00:32:45
I mean no one ever has a bad word to say
00:32:47
about die Henwood and this is a product
00:32:49
of um I don't know what you've done yeah
00:32:52
I think you've bought only nothing but
00:32:54
positivity into the world I think my my
00:32:57
thing has always been since the
00:32:59
beginning My slogan was sort of I'm just
00:33:01
a kiwi trying to have a good time and
00:33:04
that's what a lot of kiwis are and um
00:33:07
I've always been in my
00:33:10
work
00:33:12
quite picky about things and right from
00:33:15
the the get-go
00:33:17
um I've been more concerned about the
00:33:20
saying no rather than saying yes and
00:33:23
then um
00:33:24
then that sort of
00:33:27
that got crystallized for me
00:33:29
um
00:33:30
bow guy I forget what his name is Jesse
00:33:33
someone he started uh CD baby he's like
00:33:38
he's a famous entrepreneur guy and his
00:33:41
thing was if something's
00:33:43
not [ __ ] yes then it's no so then I was
00:33:48
like that actually crystallized with me
00:33:50
and I know I either really want to do
00:33:52
something or it's not do it and so uh
00:33:56
I I was doing I was in the pissed comic
00:34:00
role on C4 just making some crazy shows
00:34:04
I don't remember insert videos
00:34:09
a lot of people won't even remember this
00:34:11
and a lot of it won't even be on YouTube
00:34:12
but it this was a crazy time in New
00:34:15
Zealand when you could buy these um like
00:34:16
synthetic cannabis like chronic and
00:34:18
those bees bzp party pills that you I
00:34:22
don't know if you were on them or
00:34:23
pretending to be on them but you played
00:34:25
this like crazy tweaked out guy yeah so
00:34:29
I this is a time this is where I cannot
00:34:33
believe that the Cannabis referendum
00:34:36
fell over when we're a country where you
00:34:38
could buy bzp party pills from the dairy
00:34:42
like Euphoria and red hearts that's
00:34:45
right oh the worst hangovers they just
00:34:48
you they were quite good at the time but
00:34:51
then you just have this grinding dry
00:34:54
headache migraine for days migraine for
00:34:57
days and so I was in that role and then
00:34:59
that got so much I'd go out and we'd
00:35:02
just get mobbed by people cause we were
00:35:05
talking to people on the street we're in
00:35:07
random places
00:35:09
um and I just get mobbed in the street I
00:35:12
remember going down to the buskers
00:35:14
Festival in Christchurch showing up to
00:35:15
my venue and there was a queue around
00:35:17
the block and I was like [ __ ] this is
00:35:19
taken off and I just had a ball that
00:35:23
then played into me drinking too much
00:35:26
then seven days came along which was
00:35:29
amazing I just loved that and then as I
00:35:33
sort of mature these other options came
00:35:35
up Family Feud which was just such a joy
00:35:38
to do I'm dancing with the stars and
00:35:40
Lego where I've sort of calmed down and
00:35:43
changed my audience but at the same time
00:35:45
it's people that grew up with me and
00:35:48
then might have kids or their people who
00:35:51
are in their early teens that have got
00:35:52
older and it's been really nice watching
00:35:54
that um actually I've sort of watched it
00:35:57
from a a position of Pride but also
00:36:00
almost like a position of Envy in a way
00:36:02
because I just I had the same job that
00:36:04
entire time and um so I was doing
00:36:06
breakfast Radio On The Edge which is a
00:36:08
like a youth like an inverted commas top
00:36:10
40 station so I was sort of growing up
00:36:13
and evolving as a person but you had to
00:36:14
do a lot of the same [ __ ] and here you
00:36:16
were you were no longer the the crazy
00:36:18
bzp party full guy you were going into
00:36:21
these more sophisticated roles and you
00:36:23
were comedies that have changed and it
00:36:25
was lovely watching that Evolution it
00:36:27
was really it was really good yeah it's
00:36:29
so funny when you say
00:36:30
um Envy because then from the other side
00:36:33
of the fence the amount of times I've
00:36:34
been at home
00:36:35
I'd quite like just a breakfast radio
00:36:37
Joe where I can focus on one thing and
00:36:40
so it's that it's it's a human you know
00:36:43
it's human it's always you go actually I
00:36:45
wouldn't mind that because sure I'd do
00:36:48
this gig but then I have a bit of down
00:36:49
time here and then I'm taking on some
00:36:51
jobs I don't really want to do it so
00:36:54
that it's just it's just life no no no
00:36:56
I'm not a not a bad sort of Envy like
00:36:59
[ __ ] die
00:37:00
um like a good sort of interview it's
00:37:01
like I'm sitting here talking about the
00:37:02
Kardashians again and he's getting
00:37:05
tagged aside the depressing the
00:37:07
depressing thing is um going over too so
00:37:10
we we go over to
00:37:12
um Aussie like for something like Family
00:37:14
Feud to get a Vibe of how the
00:37:16
Australians do it what what a day looks
00:37:20
like filming shows and all that and so
00:37:22
I'll go over for that and then went over
00:37:24
and was hang out with Hamish Blake uh a
00:37:27
little bit and then and then just
00:37:29
sussing out now oh you Aussies get paid
00:37:32
quite differently to us kiwis yeah it
00:37:35
just just because the the niche
00:37:39
over there if you're in a niche you know
00:37:41
I'm sure you've got a top radio show
00:37:43
over there that's printing oh yeah my
00:37:46
name is Andy two hours a day or so I
00:37:48
think it's just one show a week never
00:37:51
seen people whose pay goes up in their
00:37:53
work their work rate seems to go down
00:37:56
they win I got to a podcast you're
00:37:59
getting paid the same amount numb and so
00:38:02
then uh that sort of built the thing up
00:38:04
of just okay I've got to love what I do
00:38:08
because the ma like the money ironically
00:38:10
I'm in the one industry where the money
00:38:12
seems to get less over time because TV
00:38:16
and radio are the things that are now
00:38:18
now because advertising is everywhere on
00:38:22
the internet those spots you know a spot
00:38:25
and I remember
00:38:26
promoting a show right and I got
00:38:29
sponsorship from um I think one one time
00:38:32
from The Edge one time from war FM and
00:38:35
one time from The Rock and um they gave
00:38:37
me some breakfast spot ads and you could
00:38:41
see how much they impacted ticket sales
00:38:44
because that right actually worked oh
00:38:46
amazingly because advertising was so
00:38:50
sought after because it wasn't like you
00:38:52
go online and you know how now your
00:38:54
brain's almost trying to avoid ads
00:38:57
because I'll visit a site even a site
00:39:00
like the herald or stuff how that have a
00:39:02
splash ad and by the time I'm reading an
00:39:05
article I couldn't tell you what that ad
00:39:07
was for you know how you made it it's
00:39:09
like with me with YouTube it's like I'm
00:39:10
hovering on the remote waiting for their
00:39:12
fights yes and so now ads are everywhere
00:39:16
you could tune them out a little bit
00:39:18
more but I think I think they're still
00:39:19
very they still uh have that
00:39:21
Effectiveness on um on in media but no
00:39:26
they were just gold yeah gold getting
00:39:28
those ads well since we've um taken a
00:39:32
like a break from the cancer chat and
00:39:34
we're back onto your career
00:39:35
um maybe we should just sit here for a
00:39:36
little bit um can we go can we go right
00:39:38
back what were you what so your mum
00:39:40
Caroline District Court Judge dad Ray
00:39:43
I'm five years older than you so I
00:39:45
remember remember your dad on a TV show
00:39:47
called gliding on uh we used to watch it
00:39:49
was an iconic New Zealand show what were
00:39:51
you like as a kid well um gliding on
00:39:54
ironically was New Zealand's longest
00:39:56
running comedy show before and then
00:39:58
seven days took that over so you're
00:40:01
gliding on gliding on when for six years
00:40:03
I think I grew up on the set of gliding
00:40:05
on out at um
00:40:07
at an um Avalon and lower Hutt I was I
00:40:11
was a gregarious kid as I mentioned
00:40:13
before I was an only child I am was
00:40:16
always
00:40:17
a performer I remember when I was five
00:40:21
um
00:40:22
I remember making a group of people
00:40:25
laugh and I wish I knew what I said or
00:40:28
did but I remember the feeling I got the
00:40:31
swell the dolphin bars of just making
00:40:35
these people laugh that I knew I wanted
00:40:39
to be in comedy and every time I started
00:40:43
doing drama I always ended up as the
00:40:46
funny guy
00:40:47
um and it just started taking off and
00:40:50
then I discovered
00:40:53
um a friend of mine at Primary School
00:40:54
had an Eddie Murphy a Delirious that his
00:40:59
famous first um outing
00:41:02
um in his lettuce
00:41:05
has not aged well no it was great that
00:41:09
was yeah incredible there's um
00:41:11
horrifically problematic jokes on there
00:41:14
when he's when he's yeah I can't even
00:41:16
sit with the homophobic slur in the
00:41:18
front yeah there's there's a lot of the
00:41:22
f word and not the swearing if we're the
00:41:24
bad if would
00:41:26
um
00:41:27
and but
00:41:29
if you take those out of it and there
00:41:33
were his just timing and he had these
00:41:36
amazing routines about his family and
00:41:39
that just and also as a kid there was so
00:41:42
much swearing in it and it was just
00:41:45
absolutely it was it was the world's
00:41:47
best comedian at the peak of his yeah it
00:41:49
was electric and he was so he was 18
00:41:52
when he did that
00:41:53
was it which blew me away yeah so he was
00:41:56
18. he was 20 when he did Beverly Hills
00:41:59
Cop and he was 21 when he did raw
00:42:03
um and the best thing about Beverly
00:42:05
Hills Cop
00:42:06
um is Sylvester Stallone was originally
00:42:09
cast as his role and they started
00:42:11
shooting with it really is excellent
00:42:14
yeah and um then they win a completely
00:42:17
different direction and he was at so
00:42:19
that got me into it then I was traveling
00:42:22
and um mum wanted me to get a present
00:42:24
for a friend and I got him a VHS of
00:42:28
Robin Williams live at the Met Robin
00:42:30
Williams just then took it to another
00:42:34
level for me and Rob Williams became my
00:42:37
favorite comic
00:42:39
um his specials were just
00:42:42
out of this world and you know a good
00:42:44
comic when I would watch he would be
00:42:47
referencing these American politicians
00:42:49
I'd never heard of but I'd still be
00:42:51
laughing just because his delivery is so
00:42:54
funny so I became obsessed with stand-up
00:42:57
then when I don't know how to get into
00:43:00
stand up in New Zealand there wasn't
00:43:02
really standing well yeah that's the
00:43:04
thing I mean like you and a bunch of
00:43:05
others have sort of paved the way where
00:43:07
it's a viable thing now but I I don't
00:43:09
know where you'd start back no because
00:43:10
we had Comics like Billy T but
00:43:15
he wasn't doing stand-up clubs like the
00:43:17
classic he was doing variety nights you
00:43:21
know we're here to do a bit of singing
00:43:22
and people would come on and then you
00:43:25
had John Clark as well but he was TV
00:43:28
personality and then when I came through
00:43:30
there were people ahead of me like um
00:43:32
Mike King
00:43:34
um sugar and spice teda Andrew Clay
00:43:37
Andrew Clay Brendan lovegrove they were
00:43:40
they were doing stuff and then we came
00:43:42
up from Wellington to Auckland for a
00:43:44
comedy competition and uh human Gilmore
00:43:49
was em sing rest in peace and he we did
00:43:53
I did a double act with a girl called
00:43:56
Anna Kennedy and it it went well and
00:43:59
Ewan was you've got to keep at this man
00:44:01
and then we started Giga this was before
00:44:04
the classic opened and so how old were
00:44:06
you then like 17 17 and we're just down
00:44:09
the road from where we were recording
00:44:11
this at kitty O'Brien's which was sort
00:44:14
of behind um Victoria Park Market and
00:44:18
did that then the classic opened this
00:44:21
was in April of 97 in the classic comedy
00:44:24
bar opened um at the end of 97 and I
00:44:29
started performing there and then it
00:44:30
just took off I moved up to Auckland I
00:44:33
put all my eggs in the comedy basket I
00:44:36
um Reece Darby and I got a flat together
00:44:39
and
00:44:41
um sort of came just came came through I
00:44:44
was lucky enough to come through with
00:44:46
Legends of like when I was working and
00:44:49
performing in Wellington it was there
00:44:52
was Tiger and Jermaine um Clement had a
00:44:56
double act you don't even need to say
00:44:57
the last yeah I know everybody any New
00:45:00
Zealand knows who I'm talking tiger and
00:45:02
Jermaine had a double act
00:45:04
um Britt McKenzie and then moved up here
00:45:07
and was with race Darby and Justine
00:45:10
Smith and
00:45:12
and just amazing Comics have all gone on
00:45:16
and various ways and then I suppose the
00:45:19
hardest part in my career where I almost
00:45:21
gave up was traveling um I was doing
00:45:24
Melbourne and Edinburgh in 2003. oh was
00:45:28
this the Edinburgh Fringe Festival yeah
00:45:30
it's 2000 so that was 20 years ago so
00:45:31
you were 25. yeah so you've been doing
00:45:34
it a long time yeah I've been doing it
00:45:35
and I'd won the Billy T award in in 2002
00:45:39
uh sort of that had given me a bit of
00:45:42
money and a bit of courage and
00:45:44
um the the Concords had been done one
00:45:47
year I think over in Edinburgh and that
00:45:49
come over man and we shared it man Brit
00:45:52
and Jermaine and myself and my um Tech
00:45:55
who was a really good mate had a flat
00:45:57
together right you and Brit were you
00:45:59
grew up together right you didn't play
00:46:01
crickets Cricket together when yeah
00:46:03
we're five or six right and um then we
00:46:06
went to the same college and we did sort
00:46:10
of drama Productions together then after
00:46:14
after college finished I was in a couple
00:46:16
of Fringe Productions um with him and
00:46:20
I've and he was actually in one of my
00:46:23
Festival shows and
00:46:25
um I've always had so much love and
00:46:27
respect for him just as a as a person
00:46:29
let alone let alone and he was in the
00:46:32
black seeds who I used to travel around
00:46:34
with because my best mate
00:46:37
um Barney is their singer so during
00:46:39
summer I'd just travel around with the
00:46:41
black seeds and um so then go to
00:46:44
Edinburgh living with the Flight of the
00:46:46
Conchords there at the bottom of their
00:46:49
hockey stick rise to fame where because
00:46:52
they went tvnz wanted they were prepared
00:46:54
to a show with them but they wanted to
00:46:56
change everything about it yeah and they
00:46:58
would know and look what happened
00:47:01
um so they were they were at the point
00:47:03
where they were selling out but to
00:47:06
comedians the room was just full of
00:47:09
comics because the word of got around
00:47:11
that these guys were hot then they just
00:47:13
got their BBC Radio Show and they were
00:47:17
just ramping up so we come
00:47:20
after after our shows or whatever would
00:47:23
have a beer or somewhere or we'd meet
00:47:25
back at our flat I would be canceling
00:47:28
shows because no one was showing up or
00:47:31
everyone was walking out of my shows and
00:47:35
they were
00:47:36
like
00:47:38
they were just flying so I'm remembering
00:47:41
it's not a career for the faint is it no
00:47:43
I remember sitting on corner of bed just
00:47:45
in breakdown of um too many hangovers
00:47:49
and hard times
00:47:51
and Brett just sitting sort of chatting
00:47:53
me through it and um
00:47:56
just that juxtaposition of wow these
00:48:00
guys have found the magic and I'm so far
00:48:04
away from that was that sort of like um
00:48:07
was that sort of like a breakdown would
00:48:09
you say yeah it was it was because I
00:48:12
lost Not only was it emotional I would
00:48:15
have lost around ten thousand pound
00:48:19
um because Edinburgh works on a
00:48:22
situation where you need to be about 40
00:48:25
full to pay the venue let alone your
00:48:30
producers for your
00:48:32
all that so even if you're successful
00:48:35
you lose money pretty much
00:48:38
so why would you do their job and then I
00:48:42
came back and I don't know why I keep
00:48:45
going but I just keep going and I
00:48:47
reinvented myself what were you doing
00:48:50
were you doing like P Funk chains or
00:48:52
John D Bank yeah I was doing character
00:48:55
late 90s character comedy yes do you
00:48:58
think part of that in Heisler was um
00:49:00
kind of fear in a way so it's easy to
00:49:03
hide behind a character than actually
00:49:05
being yourself on stage no it wasn't
00:49:07
fear so much as I came through from an
00:49:10
acting background so I
00:49:13
so you did characters on stage also a
00:49:16
name you mentioned before John Clark who
00:49:18
was Fred Dad yeah yeah I suppose if you
00:49:20
grow up on that and um weirdly when I
00:49:22
was in Melbourne having a similar
00:49:24
failing experience halfway through I
00:49:27
went out for lunch with John Clark and
00:49:30
um he was sort of giving me a few tips
00:49:33
and that and it still just it was like
00:49:35
well the great tips but how do I just
00:49:37
get anyone to come and see my shows and
00:49:40
I remember he I think he came along and
00:49:43
Alan bro who was a great New Zealander
00:49:47
who sort of got adopted by Australia and
00:49:50
um it was a struggle it was a real
00:49:52
struggle and I came back and went
00:49:54
actually I'm gonna ditch the characters
00:49:55
I'm just gonna be myself
00:49:58
and then I went back to Edinburgh
00:50:01
and I didn't do a solo show I did
00:50:03
line-up shows
00:50:05
um nothing came out of it but I was
00:50:08
getting great response then I went back
00:50:10
through Melbourne and I met um met the
00:50:14
woman Joe who became my wife
00:50:17
and then everything started to pick up
00:50:19
then I did a Monday night at the classic
00:50:21
hosting a rookie night and
00:50:24
um Andrew Schusterman from C4 was there
00:50:27
and he said doing a TV show and I said
00:50:29
yeah and he said sweet you start next
00:50:31
week this is a girl film it I'll email
00:50:33
you what it's about and go make it so
00:50:36
that was the beginning of C4 so there
00:50:38
was like insert video here yeah so this
00:50:40
is this is C4 would have been on around
00:50:42
maybe for a year or so before that but
00:50:45
but was just music
00:50:47
it just sort of had you know severe and
00:50:50
Nick being that doing the music sort of
00:50:53
shows yeah it's right yeah and even
00:50:54
Clark Gafford was doing a show yeah
00:50:56
Clark had a show Sevilla was doing major
00:50:58
flavors yeah was doing a rock show yeah
00:51:01
John John yeah and then I came on and
00:51:05
did comedy between into the video here
00:51:09
was comedy
00:51:11
random comedy
00:51:13
throw throw to a song but it was under a
00:51:17
broad theme
00:51:19
and so I do uh best songs for House
00:51:22
Parties we'd go to a house party in
00:51:25
ranui almost get stabbed stop someone
00:51:28
from being sexually assaulted oh
00:51:31
thinking back on it
00:51:33
it was just I remember one
00:51:37
thing like we're going around the house
00:51:39
party just opened the store and it's
00:51:43
just three dude smoking pee
00:51:47
and the one guy seriously about to
00:51:49
sexually assault this woman
00:51:52
we bust in very quickly my camera person
00:51:55
quickly gauges as soon okay just saying
00:51:59
so I just run straight up to her just
00:52:03
hey guys having a good night straight up
00:52:04
to her chopped her over my shoulder we
00:52:07
walked straight out of the house party
00:52:08
called a cab and to get just get gave
00:52:12
her some cash and went just getting this
00:52:13
cab and go home
00:52:15
um this party they didn't make it to
00:52:17
here no no no no no this party's not
00:52:19
going in the right direction and I think
00:52:22
those dudes are not gonna do it's not
00:52:25
gonna end well
00:52:26
um but it was those moments and that
00:52:28
particular moment was
00:52:30
this is going too far man we're at this
00:52:33
Huawei and run we're at a house party
00:52:36
but like people smoking pay this is just
00:52:41
like
00:52:42
this is the this is you know you if you
00:52:46
were scoping at a location that's not
00:52:49
what you would be yeah yeah but it was
00:52:52
um I it's amazing so do you think had
00:52:55
you not
00:52:56
um made that transition to go from
00:52:59
character to being yourself that you
00:53:00
would have ended up just giving it
00:53:01
giving it away at some point yeah I I
00:53:04
suppose if you're like eight years deep
00:53:06
and it wasn't working there's got to be
00:53:07
some point where you go I need to get a
00:53:09
job yeah I that was always there so I
00:53:12
worked I'd always been someone who um
00:53:16
I wanted to work and I wanted to earn
00:53:19
money I mean um along the way when times
00:53:23
have got tough I was very blessed that
00:53:25
my parents sort of helped me out here
00:53:27
and there but they were very strict in
00:53:30
terms of the fact of give yourself five
00:53:31
years this shit's not working out you're
00:53:34
gonna have to figure out how to support
00:53:36
yourself because so I've worked and I'd
00:53:39
worked double shifts and bars I worked
00:53:41
in
00:53:42
um one red dog I managed at one red dog
00:53:45
in ponsonby for ages um had the joy of
00:53:49
um meeting the wonderful Sumo Stevenson
00:53:52
Scotty Stevenson who he was the king of
00:53:54
lime bar at the time
00:53:57
um and I always worked hard I played
00:54:02
hard and then I did comedy and then
00:54:06
luckily comedy comedy became the job and
00:54:09
I was a hustler as well I was doing
00:54:12
I was convincing Microsoft to hire me
00:54:14
for corporate gigs before I had any
00:54:17
skills I um there was a wonderful um
00:54:21
Ad Agency called Republic that also is
00:54:24
just around the corner from here they um
00:54:26
they really helped me out by believing
00:54:29
in me and hiring me for a few corporate
00:54:31
gigs I was doing I sort of got
00:54:33
intertwined with Xbox early on
00:54:37
um so I I did Hustle to I was very
00:54:41
determined to go and whenever I got
00:54:42
booked for something I'd make damn sure
00:54:44
I'd do it good job good job and
00:54:48
um
00:54:49
and sometimes
00:54:51
sometimes
00:54:53
it didn't go according to planners you
00:54:56
mentioned the character John the bank
00:54:57
teller it was this bank teller from
00:54:59
rural taranaki that I do I hired to do
00:55:03
this corporate gig I go on I did 20
00:55:05
minutes
00:55:06
I didn't get one laugh and it was beyond
00:55:09
not getting a laugh it was like this
00:55:11
room is full of ice and it's quite
00:55:14
hostile and I don't know why
00:55:17
I walk off stage and the organizer like
00:55:19
runs out what the [ __ ] are you doing
00:55:21
what are you doing man I mean what do
00:55:24
you mean you mean this gigs for ASB and
00:55:27
one of their bank tellers was killed in
00:55:29
an armed robbery
00:55:31
like two days ago
00:55:33
and I'm doing this bank teller who one
00:55:37
big bit of mine is about a robbery
00:55:41
and so it's like then I look back on it
00:55:45
and go oh my God it's like I've gone out
00:55:47
and done the most distasteful 20 minutes
00:55:56
wow that um that really explains the
00:56:00
hostility and then thinking back on it
00:56:03
it's uh
00:56:05
uh very because Comics love more than
00:56:09
more in than anything a good death story
00:56:13
when Comics sit around you just talk
00:56:16
about your worst gigs basically I
00:56:18
suppose yeah good death stories as long
00:56:19
as you've got enough um successful
00:56:21
stories oh yeah as long as you're in a
00:56:23
good place now everybody and they're all
00:56:26
lad stories is just desperately tragic
00:56:29
so um so you mentioned your wife Joe
00:56:31
before so you meet her in Australia yeah
00:56:34
she's a Kiwi from West Auckland um she
00:56:36
was living in Melbourne I am I had had
00:56:40
an amazing time over in Britain with um
00:56:43
a guy who's a great friend Jesse Griffin
00:56:45
who um he does the amazing um uh Wilson
00:56:49
Dixon character he he lived in Melbourne
00:56:52
for ages so um we really hit it off over
00:56:57
in the UK I flew back stayed with him
00:57:00
um for a month and um then met my wife
00:57:05
and then we started really how old were
00:57:07
you guys then
00:57:08
the I don't know 2005 so late 20s right
00:57:12
late 20s and um
00:57:15
it was just a really glorious time my
00:57:18
great mates over in Melbourne
00:57:21
um my friend Justine Smith who's a comic
00:57:24
over here she was my best man at my
00:57:26
wedding and she was living in Melbourne
00:57:28
at the time had good mates there so I
00:57:30
started going back and forth to
00:57:31
Melbourne for a bit and then um Joe
00:57:34
moved over here and she started working
00:57:38
as an Arts publicist and we just headed
00:57:40
off I knew the second I met her that I
00:57:43
wanted to marry her which I was gonna he
00:57:45
was gonna ask if it was like love at
00:57:46
first sight or a slow burn it was love
00:57:48
at first sight both ways
00:57:50
potential
00:57:54
potentially we I mean we we love each
00:57:57
other so much and um and so we've been
00:58:01
together since um we started dating in
00:58:04
2006 and then we just
00:58:07
um got married and she's been
00:58:10
an absolute rock for me through
00:58:13
um me being a Bose Hound to
00:58:16
um she gave up booze as well it just
00:58:19
wasn't looking for either of us and um
00:58:22
then she's just been a rock through
00:58:24
through this and the hurt and the pain
00:58:27
my diagnosis is um had on her as well as
00:58:32
me as just pretty insane
00:58:34
[Music]
00:58:37
yeah how is she she's she's really good
00:58:40
I mean everything it's waves man that
00:58:43
this whole cancer thing it's waves
00:58:46
you'll be great it's it's this
00:58:49
I actually liken it a bit to to grief
00:58:52
where
00:58:54
grief
00:58:56
when you initially have grief around a
00:58:58
death or something
00:59:00
that grief hits you all the time and it
00:59:03
just knocks you for sex and then as time
00:59:06
passes the grief hits you less but it's
00:59:09
just as strong so you get the same [ __ ]
00:59:12
feelings but just less of the time and
00:59:16
it comes in waves I mean we're in a
00:59:18
great spot now where I'm I I did
00:59:22
treatment all to the end of it right up
00:59:24
to Christmas last year I finished chemo
00:59:27
two days before Christmas doing sort of
00:59:30
another five rounds of that I did Heavy
00:59:32
radiation
00:59:34
and now I'm at a point where I'm
00:59:36
sort of I can work I'm feeling great I
00:59:41
spend a lot of January starting sort of
00:59:43
scientific papers and drawing up a
00:59:45
protocol for myself to use health-wise
00:59:48
for the next three months to see if I
00:59:52
can slow the progression of of tumors or
00:59:55
stop the progression of tumors
00:59:58
and so when I scan and mail I'll see
01:00:01
whether this protocol of sort of has
01:00:04
worked put together has worked
01:00:07
um so I really enjoy that but then the
01:00:10
the what I'm doing is just um is making
01:00:14
me feel really healthy as well so so the
01:00:17
the treatment you had just prior to
01:00:18
Christmas what does that do does that
01:00:20
like shrink the yeah the aim was
01:00:22
basically to
01:00:23
shrink the tumors as much as possible to
01:00:27
buy me I I liken this to trying to keep
01:00:30
a classic car on the road
01:00:32
um like we don't have the exact parts we
01:00:36
need at the moment so we just need to
01:00:38
keep the rust out keep everything
01:00:40
ticking along because there is great
01:00:44
advances being made in the cancer space
01:00:48
um and you never know what's going to
01:00:51
happen you never know my body might
01:00:52
click in and discover what's because
01:00:55
tumors sort of hide themselves that's
01:00:57
the hard thing like
01:00:59
everyone knows oh you're just not
01:01:01
everyone but people think oh sure you
01:01:03
just strengthen your immune system that
01:01:05
works itself out but they're they're
01:01:07
nasty little bastards to hide themselves
01:01:10
from the immune system so I mean in an
01:01:11
Ideal World my body would figure this
01:01:14
out but
01:01:15
um yeah I'm sort of using all the tools
01:01:18
at my disposal to keep the tumor loaders
01:01:20
as low as possible and just be as
01:01:23
healthy as possible yeah yeah like we
01:01:25
were talking about before just con you
01:01:26
know control the controllables
01:01:28
um
01:01:30
yeah yeah wow um so did Joe come with
01:01:34
you when you went for that first
01:01:35
hospital visit or yes so she she'd been
01:01:38
so this was the other absolute mind [ __ ]
01:01:42
around
01:01:44
um
01:01:45
the initial diagnosis and covert I
01:01:48
couldn't go anywhere with another person
01:01:52
because we were in yeah bear in mind we
01:01:56
were in
01:01:57
washing here bread bags from the
01:02:01
supermarket buzz you remember that like
01:02:03
oh yeah it was intense it was like you
01:02:05
come back from you're wearing gloves at
01:02:07
the supermarket Master you come home
01:02:09
you're washing everything you've got
01:02:11
quarantine areas in your house no one
01:02:14
knew what was going on yeah it was
01:02:15
terrifying so it was you couldn't have
01:02:18
support people at chemo scans or
01:02:22
anything
01:02:23
um I could for my specialist
01:02:25
appointments which was an absolute Joy
01:02:29
um
01:02:30
but I mean she was there every step of
01:02:34
the way sitting in the car I've got two
01:02:36
young kids so trying to keep things as
01:02:39
um
01:02:40
sane for the kids as possible while no
01:02:43
one's being able to leave the house so
01:02:46
it was intense it was really intense and
01:02:49
the main thing is I'm blessed for my
01:02:51
family and my friends who just circled
01:02:54
the wagons and looked after everything
01:02:58
everything well I mean I think this is
01:03:01
the a case of your report you so so like
01:03:04
what you're getting now is
01:03:06
um like a combination accumulation I
01:03:09
guess of the the work that you've done
01:03:11
and the love that you've given out your
01:03:12
entire life yeah and that's what I've
01:03:13
always been about is love and um it's
01:03:17
something that I sort of got across in
01:03:19
the the interview which I'm very about
01:03:21
is I'm not a fat cancer I'm fighting
01:03:25
cancer guy I actually am
01:03:28
it's just a part of me that's gone
01:03:30
Haywire it's themselves and me that have
01:03:32
gone haywire and um I'm just trying to
01:03:35
send love to it and
01:03:38
um just the the the process of love and
01:03:40
giving out love
01:03:42
does create
01:03:45
um a bit of space it's almost like the
01:03:46
idea of um
01:03:48
I love the idea of doing good deeds for
01:03:51
people and not telling them about the
01:03:54
Good Deeds just doing it then they think
01:03:58
the world's a better place because good
01:04:00
things are happening to them so then
01:04:02
they in turn think the world's a better
01:04:04
place so they act like the world's a
01:04:05
better place so it's just giving
01:04:09
just sending some goodness out into the
01:04:11
world because should it needs it at the
01:04:13
moment like I mean it
01:04:15
it's if no matter what side of things
01:04:18
you sit on Covert just created an even
01:04:22
more divisive time let alone the way
01:04:26
politics everything seems to have gone
01:04:29
into very
01:04:30
tribalism
01:04:32
our camping engineer camps and so forth
01:04:34
and and so
01:04:36
if you can put a bit more love out there
01:04:38
I'm into that absolutely and you're you
01:04:41
so you've got two kids Charlie and Lucy
01:04:42
how old are they they are ten and seven
01:04:46
right and what are that what are they
01:04:47
like good kids yeah they're similar or
01:04:49
they're quite different very different
01:04:50
yeah
01:04:51
um I I sort of have so much in common
01:04:54
with my son he's a little Legend he's
01:04:57
just started playing um so he's the
01:04:59
Elder yeah he's 10 he's just started
01:05:01
playing rugby last year and um he's so
01:05:03
into it and we just share a lot of um
01:05:07
interests and then Lucy's so cheeky and
01:05:11
funny and
01:05:13
they just with
01:05:15
being a parent is something that I'd
01:05:18
sort of always wanted to do but I had no
01:05:20
idea
01:05:21
how to do so I don't think anyone does
01:05:23
no so it is just figuring it out and it
01:05:28
was hard man it was really hard
01:05:32
um and then it's just sort of working
01:05:35
itself out and I think it's becoming
01:05:38
easier mainly because I'm figuring out
01:05:40
who I am and I'm figuring out
01:05:44
what triggers me and how to avoid
01:05:48
triggers and and those sort of things so
01:05:52
I think I think not enough
01:05:55
people spend time learning who they are
01:05:58
and for me that can only happen when I
01:06:02
turn off TV put down my phone step away
01:06:05
from computer or iPad or whatever and
01:06:07
just sit not meditate just sit and sort
01:06:10
of figure out who I am and what do you
01:06:13
mean just on your own just on your own
01:06:15
yeah I like I I recommend people just
01:06:18
sit down and because people are scared
01:06:21
of their own thoughts yeah but
01:06:24
there's nothing to be scared of of your
01:06:26
own thoughts it just they're just
01:06:28
electrical firings that come and go
01:06:31
memories are just electrical firings
01:06:34
that come and go they may or may not be
01:06:36
right you know like I remember I have
01:06:40
memories sometimes I'll I'll talk to a
01:06:42
mate about say filming insert or
01:06:44
something and then they have a slight
01:06:47
different memory of how it went down and
01:06:49
it's still broadly the same thing but
01:06:51
it's amazing
01:06:53
our wrong eyewitness accounts
01:06:56
you know like so it's like it's like wow
01:06:59
I might remember things wrong or
01:07:02
whatever so they're just they're just
01:07:04
mental firings in your in your mind so
01:07:07
um so so
01:07:09
um when you get the diagnosis how long
01:07:10
after that do you tell the kids or what
01:07:12
like what are you and your wife straight
01:07:14
away yeah pretty much what do you say
01:07:16
though how do you
01:07:17
well it's it's all about short-term
01:07:20
stuff because that's all this is like so
01:07:24
it's about
01:07:25
I'm in treatment to this then I'll have
01:07:28
a break I've got the summer off I might
01:07:29
have to have a bit more treatment
01:07:31
this is what I'm dealing with I might
01:07:34
need some surgery
01:07:37
um bite size of it for me basically
01:07:39
given what they can process yeah not
01:07:42
adults like to over talk too much is
01:07:45
sort of I like to
01:07:47
broadly lay out what's going on and then
01:07:50
I'll answer any questions that they have
01:07:53
and
01:07:55
you've got to be very careful I think
01:07:57
talking to other people's children that
01:08:00
that's the worry I had about going
01:08:02
public is I don't want people coming up
01:08:04
and talking to my children about it
01:08:06
because people often come in with the
01:08:08
best of intentions with things and then
01:08:15
who the [ __ ] would do that but there are
01:08:17
people there yeah there are there are
01:08:19
and they might think they're they're
01:08:21
helping but but they're not it's like um
01:08:24
it's like if someone tells you they have
01:08:26
cancer don't don't tell your story of
01:08:29
how your auntie had cancer because
01:08:31
that's what people do they they you
01:08:33
someone's talking about something you go
01:08:35
I know something I have a related
01:08:38
question and I think it comes from a
01:08:40
genuine place but yeah it does come from
01:08:43
a good place 90 of the time but
01:08:46
everyone's cancer story is different so
01:08:50
I don't need to hear about your Auntie's
01:08:53
story
01:08:54
I'll talk I'll talk to your auntie about
01:08:57
that because like I I feel I suddenly do
01:09:01
have a bond with if I bump into someone
01:09:03
who's going through a similar journey to
01:09:06
me you do sort of have it yeah well it's
01:09:09
a bit like the war you know how like
01:09:12
people have been fought in the War come
01:09:15
back and they relate to other people
01:09:17
have been there because you can't
01:09:20
explain it I mean unless you've been the
01:09:23
partner of someone who who you've sort
01:09:25
of been there or you've been like a
01:09:26
support person who's been through this
01:09:29
you've taken on some of that trauma but
01:09:32
there's so much trauma yeah there and I
01:09:35
feel like I've
01:09:37
addressed the trauma as it was happening
01:09:40
which
01:09:41
is good and I feel like I've come out
01:09:44
without too many too much PTSD but I'll
01:09:47
talk to you after a massive mushrooms
01:09:49
trip and then I'll see whether that's
01:09:52
the next step for me well that's the um
01:09:54
is it actually yeah I definitely want to
01:09:57
do a therapeutic mushroom journey in a
01:10:00
controlled environment yeah controller
01:10:01
I've done plenty of psychedelics in my
01:10:04
life and um I feel like yeah you
01:10:06
wouldn't you wouldn't freak out you even
01:10:07
though you've been clean and sober for
01:10:09
many years now you're better yeah I
01:10:11
think there's right I don't I don't look
01:10:13
at
01:10:14
um
01:10:15
therapeutic mushrooms as like breaking a
01:10:18
sobriety thing
01:10:20
um
01:10:21
but then I'm also aware of time and
01:10:24
place and there's so many factors that
01:10:27
need to be right in there and I just
01:10:29
noticed Australia's actually just
01:10:31
suddenly made MDMA and mushrooms legal
01:10:33
have they what states yeah oh no I I I
01:10:37
think I saw that as a post yesterday
01:10:40
then I did a bit of a dive mode oh no
01:10:42
there's a lot of caviers so I can't just
01:10:45
fly to Canberra it's not party pills of
01:10:47
the dairy this is
01:10:50
um I think they've just legalized it for
01:10:52
use in therapy right okay oh that makes
01:10:55
sense oh that's a good step in the right
01:10:56
way and then then of course there's
01:10:59
then I started looking into it then I
01:11:02
listened to this horrific podcast series
01:11:05
about how bad how wrong it can go of
01:11:09
therapists abusing their patients and
01:11:12
preying on vulnerable people Jesus
01:11:15
whenever there's anything good yeah
01:11:18
humans will find the bad side to it have
01:11:21
um do you think you've changed I mean
01:11:22
you as we've discussed a few times
01:11:25
through this podcast like you've been a
01:11:26
great guy all along but do you think
01:11:27
you've changed as a like a husband and
01:11:29
father yeah I um
01:11:32
oh so I love change I've always love
01:11:35
change and the only thing in this life
01:11:38
that's guaranteed has changed things are
01:11:41
going to change and we're just energy
01:11:43
we're made of energy and that energy
01:11:45
changes constantly I have really really
01:11:49
worked on being a better
01:11:52
husband and in what way not coming from
01:11:56
a point of view of I'm a bad yeah yeah a
01:12:00
husband or father just be better ten
01:12:02
percent better yeah just
01:12:05
try and be a better person realize that
01:12:08
my temper I got short and then I dealt
01:12:12
with that interaction badly or
01:12:15
um
01:12:16
they're a bit shitty at me
01:12:18
instead of it's their problem what
01:12:21
happened trying to unbiasedly look at
01:12:24
things and you know relationships are
01:12:27
hard yeah um friendships are hard to but
01:12:31
you know like it takes effort also yeah
01:12:34
as we've as we've said no one no one has
01:12:36
a bad word to say about you and no one
01:12:38
has a bad interaction with you but human
01:12:41
nature you tend to save your worst
01:12:42
behavior for the people you love the
01:12:43
most you because they see you at the
01:12:46
hardest times yeah you snap at people
01:12:49
um you misread things I mean my wife and
01:12:52
I both work at a relationship which is
01:12:55
why I believe
01:12:58
it's in the strongest point it has been
01:13:01
even though we're in the hardest point
01:13:04
maybe that it has been and
01:13:07
um because not only did we have that
01:13:09
cancer diagnosis we were dealing with
01:13:11
what so many
01:13:13
parents were dealing with of
01:13:16
homeschooling
01:13:18
being around people too much you know
01:13:22
both my wife and I
01:13:24
Thrive by ourselves we need alone alone
01:13:29
time I love being alone you know I'd
01:13:33
rather
01:13:35
travel internationally by myself than
01:13:37
with someone else not not like I'd love
01:13:39
to do it with my wife but when I was
01:13:41
younger yeah I wouldn't want to go on an
01:13:43
OE with a mate I'd rather do it by
01:13:45
myself I'm that kind of guy she's very
01:13:47
similar so being alone makes us better
01:13:52
people so I would during chemo and that
01:13:55
I would go out to Piha for two days at
01:14:00
the end of a chemo session because often
01:14:03
after chemo I found for my my journey
01:14:06
the two days after chemo were harder
01:14:08
than when your body was purging
01:14:11
everything yeah so I'd go out to pee
01:14:14
hard chill out be in nature as much as I
01:14:16
can yeah you love that place get in the
01:14:18
water I love the place I love the bush I
01:14:21
love the ocean
01:14:22
um if anything this journey away from
01:14:26
booze and towards health
01:14:29
has towards a sort of full final healing
01:14:33
nature is the answer to me and finding
01:14:38
intuition and listening
01:14:41
to an intuition like um the whole way
01:14:44
through I've always been interested in
01:14:46
fasting and fasting keep popping popping
01:14:49
up in my mind and then I was you've got
01:14:51
to listen to this I was like [ __ ]
01:14:53
fasting might actually
01:14:55
be a massive tool for me in this and now
01:14:58
I've sort of embraced it what I'm doing
01:15:00
through the next
01:15:02
three months is doing longer
01:15:05
fasts of sort of doing a three day and a
01:15:09
five-day fast once a month and I because
01:15:13
it helped me so much in chemotherapy and
01:15:16
so I've sort of been investigating that
01:15:19
and studying the science behind that and
01:15:22
I'm blessed to have a dad who wasn't
01:15:24
only an actor he was a scientist at the
01:15:27
DSi area was a forensic toxicologist
01:15:29
that's right didn't he
01:15:32
breathalyzer is one of the people
01:15:33
introducing the breathalyzer so so I
01:15:37
always had this massive respect for
01:15:38
Science and
01:15:41
studying so I enjoy
01:15:44
finding the science behind things it
01:15:46
also gives you a skeptical mind of
01:15:48
trying to prove things so
01:15:51
I'm not I I like finding things trying
01:15:55
to listen to my intuition listening to
01:15:59
your gut you have all the knowledge you
01:16:01
need to live inside you don't need to
01:16:04
keep looking things up on the internet I
01:16:06
think this goes back to that just sit
01:16:08
and listen to yourself you know looking
01:16:10
at the Geniuses in history they just
01:16:13
come up with these genius ideas you know
01:16:16
they have this knowledge inside of them
01:16:19
and I think humans now because we have
01:16:22
the joy of the internet which has so
01:16:25
many Goods we Outsource a bit of our
01:16:27
knowledge when when in terms of living
01:16:30
you have an internal
01:16:31
knowledge yeah so
01:16:35
um so stage four when people hear that
01:16:37
they
01:16:39
they you must see it when people people
01:16:41
see you they give you eyes off Petty
01:16:43
yeah it freaks people out because also I
01:16:46
am
01:16:47
I another reason why I wanted to be
01:16:50
public was I sort of told Amaze who I
01:16:54
dumped into who I hadn't seen for five
01:16:57
years and you know they almost fell over
01:17:01
whereas I was quite blase about it
01:17:03
because I've been living you've told the
01:17:05
story so many times yeah and be living
01:17:06
within so it's sort of I passed on there
01:17:08
information stage four just means it is
01:17:12
moved from one place to another
01:17:15
it's not a death sentence no stage four
01:17:18
is just it's moved from one place to
01:17:20
another
01:17:21
so
01:17:23
it's treated I think also the fact is
01:17:26
now people live a lot longer with
01:17:28
Advanced cancer
01:17:30
um
01:17:31
so
01:17:32
I'm not I'm I'm not one and who's into
01:17:36
timelines yeah I don't Google things and
01:17:40
this percentage of people did this
01:17:41
because everyone's cancer journey is so
01:17:45
different everyone's Health journey is
01:17:48
so different what works for you might
01:17:50
not work for somebody else this tip
01:17:53
worked amazingly for someone it might
01:17:54
not work for me so
01:17:57
this is just something I'm going through
01:17:59
I've built up a toolbox of things that
01:18:02
help me
01:18:04
um you know I this is we're over over
01:18:07
time and I'm sort of putting together a
01:18:09
a talk that has the tools in there and
01:18:13
sort of I'm trying to figure out at the
01:18:15
moment what tools worked for me that
01:18:19
that were little
01:18:21
the the personalized or whatever and and
01:18:24
uh not a protocol but but a toolbox I
01:18:29
could give other people that help either
01:18:32
in a work environment or a health
01:18:33
environment or just making a day easier
01:18:36
yeah well I feel like the things that
01:18:37
you're you're doing like the meditation
01:18:39
and uh yeah the mindfulness and just
01:18:41
watching what you eat and oh and and
01:18:44
sobriety I think they could help anyone
01:18:46
whether you're whether you've got a
01:18:48
disease or not yeah and and
01:18:50
um just
01:18:52
it's getting into that state would you
01:18:55
know with when you're doing long
01:18:57
distance
01:18:59
running where you're never trying to
01:19:01
focus on
01:19:03
one thing like in terms of the fact that
01:19:06
you know your 3ks and
01:19:08
to 40 odd K race
01:19:11
and you've got a little niggle on your
01:19:13
toe or whatever
01:19:15
and then you just start going okay three
01:19:18
thirty seven more K's on this toe and
01:19:20
this is giving me a bit of jet now
01:19:23
you can't just focus on that getting
01:19:26
into a mental state where you can move
01:19:28
past that you can
01:19:31
um
01:19:31
you can focus on the broader picture and
01:19:35
this is where I I love
01:19:38
I I get a bit fascinated with ultra's
01:19:41
sort of athletes like Rich Roll who has
01:19:43
a oh he's an amazing podcast amazing
01:19:45
podcast he just has amazing people on it
01:19:48
um these sort of ultra athletes that go
01:19:52
a lead Hamilton but the big wave surfer
01:19:56
these people who just take put their
01:19:59
bodies under horrendous
01:20:02
um
01:20:03
horrendous sort of stress and how they
01:20:07
they deal with it and um Rich Roll
01:20:10
actually had a guest on called Tony
01:20:12
riddle I think his name is and he
01:20:16
um he ran
01:20:19
he ran all these Peaks and and the UK
01:20:22
then Barefoot he's all about re-wilding
01:20:26
and oh yeah grounding with the Earth
01:20:28
taking things Back To Nature and I read
01:20:30
his book and it actually it gave me a
01:20:33
lot of
01:20:34
things so I'm someone I love learning
01:20:38
and but then I also love trusting
01:20:42
trusting myself absolutely and what's
01:20:45
next with work wise it seems like you're
01:20:47
not slowing down no I'm I'm um I'm doing
01:20:49
a TV show that will um that will all
01:20:52
become apparent I can't really do
01:20:54
without do with the diagnosis no no oh I
01:20:57
I'm I've got something like that in the
01:20:59
works which is I'm working on it's a
01:21:02
hard thing to frame
01:21:04
um so I've got I'm sort of working on
01:21:06
that I'm doing a couple of other
01:21:08
projects I'm doing a lot of live gigs it
01:21:11
was a trip actually last week I did the
01:21:13
interview on a Friday then I had the
01:21:16
next Friday I had a stand-up Giga New
01:21:18
Plymouth Public stand-up good and I was
01:21:22
like this is going to be a massive mind
01:21:25
[ __ ] for me going on stage
01:21:27
having this double for people have seen
01:21:30
me seen the interview the what's the
01:21:33
vibe going to be like so rang up Scotty
01:21:35
at the classic and went can I just go on
01:21:38
stage for a few minutes on Wednesday I
01:21:40
need to get onto a stage and figure out
01:21:43
oh so like rehearse in a way yeah just
01:21:46
figure out just figure out what the vibe
01:21:48
is
01:21:49
and what my vibe is and on Wednesday I
01:21:51
went out I stupidly then decided to do
01:21:54
all new material as well as just figure
01:21:56
out so I wasn't like going in the vibe
01:22:00
then had a few jokes I know were
01:22:03
so winner that was okay A bit of a
01:22:06
shambles and it freaked me out but then
01:22:09
why did it freak you out
01:22:11
because I didn't know how to frame the
01:22:13
cancer thing because it's like going
01:22:16
into something heavy then see going out
01:22:18
into jokes is quite
01:22:21
hard especially when it's so personal
01:22:23
and I've got so much to say but it needs
01:22:27
to be condensed so I
01:22:30
Wednesday was a bit weird then just went
01:22:33
out in front of this crowd a new
01:22:34
Plymouth who was so beautiful and had
01:22:38
the most of my probably one of the top
01:22:40
five gigs of my life really like it was
01:22:44
you know you know as a stand-up you know
01:22:47
it's been a good gig when I went five
01:22:50
minutes over my time came off and went
01:22:53
oh [ __ ] there was all three jokes I
01:22:55
didn't do so that's when I know
01:22:58
it's just been fun where I've been
01:23:00
riffing I had a bit of cancer chat I
01:23:05
um it just was amazing so then that when
01:23:08
oh I'm just back massively back in love
01:23:11
with stand up so I've got a few shows
01:23:14
um
01:23:15
coming up got a few corporate gigs I've
01:23:17
got a nice little balance you love being
01:23:20
busy though right yeah I love being busy
01:23:21
with things I love doing
01:23:24
um I'm playing Cricket I've always
01:23:25
played crooked I play cricket every
01:23:26
Monday night back doing that
01:23:30
um and then in May well scan we'll see
01:23:33
what the situation is might need some
01:23:36
more treatment might not but I'm just
01:23:39
gonna
01:23:39
um keep taking every day as it comes
01:23:42
yeah you seem so um optimistic about
01:23:45
staying healthy or even recovering so
01:23:47
the um these these last few questions
01:23:49
might might not might work might not but
01:23:52
um I thought about you the other day
01:23:54
that the the book um by Mark Manson
01:23:56
settle out of giving a [ __ ] have you
01:23:58
read that book yeah I have yeah yeah so
01:24:00
there's a there's a quote in there and
01:24:01
um I was reading this up after um
01:24:03
watching the interview you did with
01:24:04
Jackie Brown and I am I actually I
01:24:06
started welling up like thinking about
01:24:08
you when I read this the more I think
01:24:10
about my own death the brighter life
01:24:12
gets the quieter the world becomes the
01:24:15
easier decisions become yeah I um
01:24:19
I recommend everyone
01:24:21
meditate on their own death every day
01:24:25
because did you do this pre-diagnosis or
01:24:28
no not really I was aware of it
01:24:30
but it massively puts things into
01:24:33
perspective yes and massively
01:24:38
if you've got a decision of something
01:24:41
you'd want to do or don't want to do
01:24:44
have it taking a bit of time to just
01:24:46
sort of think when I'm
01:24:48
when I'm on that day speed or whatever
01:24:51
will I be glad I did this or
01:24:55
um
01:24:56
I I just think it's it is a great way of
01:24:59
crystallizing life and not in a negative
01:25:02
not in a negative way but I think it's a
01:25:05
thing of
01:25:06
being aware of the clock can make you
01:25:09
appreciate the moments more I think just
01:25:12
be aware of the the clock the clock well
01:25:15
for any one of us you never know when
01:25:16
their clock's gonna work but that's the
01:25:19
thing what I've got
01:25:22
you know I don't know whether that's
01:25:24
going to be the thing that gets me you
01:25:26
know you know like that's the thing
01:25:28
there's plenty of stories of people
01:25:29
living way past their diagnosis there's
01:25:33
you know you see so many tragedies from
01:25:37
even the recent flooding people passed
01:25:39
away you know they weren't expecting
01:25:41
that Peter Blake didn't think he'd be
01:25:44
killed by pirates in the Amazon you know
01:25:47
like the crazy [ __ ] happens just live
01:25:52
every moment you can and it's so cliche
01:25:56
the word mindfulness now
01:25:59
it's it's been so adopted by the sort of
01:26:04
inspo
01:26:06
um fitzbo
01:26:08
um Instagram influencer bars you know
01:26:10
Mindful and a beautiful font and [ __ ]
01:26:13
just but actually being a bit more
01:26:16
mindful about the food you eat the
01:26:20
exercise you do how many times you pick
01:26:23
up your phone or all that [ __ ] your
01:26:27
interactions with people are words you
01:26:29
say to people yeah just take a bit more
01:26:32
into I suppose mindfulness I think
01:26:35
intentions a bit of better word for me
01:26:38
I'm just trying to do things with
01:26:41
intention like when I pick up a phone
01:26:43
what's my intention here because you
01:26:47
know so many times I'll go oh [ __ ] I've
01:26:49
got to reply to that email then all of a
01:26:51
sudden um
01:26:52
yeah and then I'm like I'm an Instagram
01:26:55
and then I've just looked at Twitter and
01:26:58
then someone mentioned oh you should to
01:27:01
check out turkey towel mushrooms now I'm
01:27:03
Googling them and I'm like what is that
01:27:05
oh they're amazing
01:27:07
um but then I'm like I haven't even
01:27:09
replied to that email so like
01:27:11
intentionally going right I'll reply
01:27:13
this email I'll put my phone back down
01:27:14
it's hard I'm not good at it but I'm I'm
01:27:18
just trying to but if you're aware of it
01:27:20
suddenly you become better at it yeah so
01:27:22
intention is something and that's
01:27:24
something I
01:27:26
struggled a lot around food I just love
01:27:30
I'm a real foodie so I just I have a
01:27:32
sweet tooth I have a pizza tooth I've
01:27:35
ever I don't even know I've got all the
01:27:39
teeth so so actually really focusing
01:27:44
um for me dialing in on nutrition and
01:27:48
vitamins and minerals and really dialing
01:27:52
in on that has been an interesting
01:27:54
Journey are you sure you want to do
01:27:55
these fasts I I love faster yeah and but
01:28:00
the thing is doing it properly like
01:28:02
because the idea is still
01:28:06
having um making sure all your nutrients
01:28:10
are right yeah and everything so so for
01:28:13
me it's a massive project and it's
01:28:16
something that I I want to do properly
01:28:18
because I wanted to do
01:28:20
figure out something I'll see if this
01:28:22
can help me I'll do it for three months
01:28:24
and then I'll scan and then oh no it
01:28:27
might not work for everyone but oh no if
01:28:29
it works for you then I'll go okay cool
01:28:31
this is a way I can live that can slow
01:28:33
yeah yeah this thing down and what are
01:28:36
you what are you scared of
01:28:39
I'm scared I mean
01:28:43
outside of roller coasters well we're
01:28:46
all scared of them apart from the
01:28:47
corkscrew rainbows yeah that's nothing
01:28:49
no although I did punch my cousin on
01:28:51
that once because I was too scared when
01:28:54
I get scared I start punching people
01:28:56
it's a bad trade
01:28:58
um
01:28:59
um I suppose I'm scared of of going
01:29:02
without
01:29:04
giving all I have to give like I have
01:29:08
I feel there's so much I have to give as
01:29:11
a parent I feel I've got a young boy and
01:29:15
I think navigating the world
01:29:19
as a male
01:29:21
with compassion and love and sharing
01:29:26
your feelings and that is very important
01:29:28
so trying to and trying to to help my
01:29:32
son
01:29:34
on a journey of masculinity
01:29:38
is something that I really want to do so
01:29:41
I have a fear of not being able to do
01:29:44
that
01:29:45
um and and not being there for my kids I
01:29:50
suppose is a fear but then I think
01:29:52
that's a fear of a lot of a lot of
01:29:54
adults but mine might be a bit more
01:29:56
crystallized
01:29:58
um it's so unselfish yeah but that's
01:30:00
what is because the thing is when I'm
01:30:02
gone it doesn't affect me I you know I
01:30:04
don't I don't have any fear of death
01:30:06
because
01:30:08
let's say this out of the whole of Life
01:30:11
death's easy part like that's just comes
01:30:15
and it happens but it's the
01:30:19
it's the B it's I suppose it's being
01:30:21
there because for me I get so much joy
01:30:25
out of
01:30:26
people and helping people or
01:30:30
um just being with people so not being I
01:30:33
suppose not being there but then
01:30:35
if you think about not being there for
01:30:37
people that actually comes back to your
01:30:40
own there you go yeah yeah because
01:30:42
you're just really writing yourself but
01:30:44
you but you you know that you and you
01:30:46
you probably should because you do
01:30:48
brighten up every room you walk into
01:30:50
yeah and I like every room that much
01:30:52
better I love there's nothing better
01:30:54
than just coming and this is what I love
01:30:57
my job of whenever I go into radio
01:31:01
station when I go into the commentary
01:31:05
work that I do
01:31:07
um just going and talking rubbish with
01:31:09
people and having a laugh is so much fun
01:31:11
and
01:31:13
and bringing some happiness to people is
01:31:16
awesome so as long as I can keep doing
01:31:18
that
01:31:19
um of one and and
01:31:22
I I grew up with a lot of fear I think I
01:31:26
was scared I was pretty scared of things
01:31:28
of um things in the night I'm scared of
01:31:32
robbers I was just quite scared of
01:31:34
things which all roller coasters yeah
01:31:36
roller coasters I think everyone's
01:31:37
scared of things and um
01:31:40
I
01:31:42
I don't have much fear now this
01:31:46
diagnosis has taken a lot of fear away
01:31:49
from me because
01:31:51
uh as the the one thing I was more
01:31:54
scared of in my life than anything was
01:31:56
cancer I'd fast forward through cancer
01:31:59
and shows I I knew I've never watched
01:32:02
the first season of Breaking Bad
01:32:04
um one because it's [ __ ] rubbish
01:32:06
compared to the rest of the season
01:32:09
just thought I'd get one controversial
01:32:11
thing in there but
01:32:14
um no because because of the cancer plot
01:32:16
and um now I I've not only faced it
01:32:21
um
01:32:21
I'll face the hardest parts of it and
01:32:25
I've chosen not to suffer
01:32:28
um because you can you can go through
01:32:30
the hardness like physically it's hard
01:32:34
physically it hurts
01:32:36
I've been cut open everywhere I've done
01:32:39
this chemo and that hurts but I chose
01:32:41
not to suffer through any of it
01:32:44
um because you can choose whether to
01:32:46
suffer or not and I'm not someone else
01:32:48
suffering's a different thing to pain
01:32:50
yeah suffering's the mental right thing
01:32:53
of it's very easy I find it could be
01:32:56
easy to get into the woe as me also
01:32:59
suffering isn't an attitude no I've got
01:33:01
this
01:33:02
um reflection you know it's like okay
01:33:05
this [ __ ] hurts how am I going to
01:33:08
deal with this pain and move on from
01:33:11
this
01:33:12
but and for me dealing with it is
01:33:14
looking at straight in the eyes dealing
01:33:17
with every dark thought and
01:33:19
acknowledging every bit of Darkness are
01:33:23
you are you um are you braver and less
01:33:25
of a worse than what you maybe thought
01:33:27
you were yeah hard out I I I you're a
01:33:30
badass I would faint and I fainted at a
01:33:33
lab test getting a normal blood test
01:33:35
that's how scared of needles I was
01:33:38
uh the first time I had to have inject
01:33:41
dude you'd be of the same age and stage
01:33:44
of when you're like 11 getting those oh
01:33:47
tetanus or whatever it was yeah like at
01:33:49
school they came round and injected you
01:33:51
and
01:33:52
um girls got a different one you the MMR
01:33:55
and tetanus yeah I don't remember that
01:33:57
and so we for some reason were given
01:34:00
them in front of assembly
01:34:02
you'd walk up on the stage and get
01:34:05
injected I'd love to see the Andy boxers
01:34:08
talk about that back in the day you'd
01:34:11
walk on stage at school and get injected
01:34:14
and
01:34:15
and I fainted and fell over in front of
01:34:19
the whole school I um
01:34:21
ending now I don't even think about it
01:34:24
so as [ __ ] It's Made Me Stronger and
01:34:27
it's also made me realize
01:34:31
um what fear is and how to overcome fear
01:34:35
and
01:34:37
um yeah I feel much the same as you've
01:34:38
lived most of my life In Fear And it's
01:34:41
held me back from doing things that I I
01:34:42
look back now from the perspective of
01:34:44
being a 50 year old man it's like why
01:34:46
didn't I just do that do that anyway
01:34:47
it's amazing however how age gives you
01:34:51
that sort of one you'd give less of a
01:34:55
[ __ ] until you're less scared and you
01:34:57
look back and go those opportunities
01:34:59
wouldn't I just go I should just tell it
01:35:01
what was the worst that could have
01:35:02
happened yeah and that thing also you
01:35:04
know with opportunities why don't I just
01:35:05
ask them yeah why didn't I just put
01:35:07
myself out there because you're scared
01:35:10
and then you realize they could just
01:35:12
said no that's so true my fears are
01:35:14
different now and my fears are like if
01:35:15
there's child steps are wet yeah I'm
01:35:18
fearful of walking down them in my all
01:35:20
birds
01:35:21
um do you have any regrets
01:35:25
um
01:35:27
it's weird these things you know you
01:35:31
know cringe drunk moments that you think
01:35:33
back on I I was actually thinking the
01:35:36
other day whether I um regretted
01:35:39
my drinking whether I regreted
01:35:42
you know those moments you think back
01:35:44
and go I thought that was funny joke but
01:35:46
I was just that could have been a bit
01:35:48
mean
01:35:50
um I'm pleased you do that too yeah and
01:35:53
we but then I went then I sort of keep
01:35:56
coming back to this
01:35:59
um
01:36:01
uh point of going actually no all those
01:36:04
moments got me to this moment and I'm
01:36:07
really happy where I am here I regret
01:36:10
um my flatmate being asleep and me being
01:36:13
really hammered and putting um full
01:36:15
noise fireworks under his duvet and
01:36:18
lighting them and then in hindsight I
01:36:20
could have killed him and burned down
01:36:22
the flat that is
01:36:29
the amount of things like young dudes do
01:36:31
like then you think that could have been
01:36:33
you know I think back on that actually
01:36:36
and like now at the time it was like
01:36:39
[ __ ] that went too far but you think we
01:36:42
can go that is like killing someone and
01:36:44
burning a house down situation
01:36:47
and so that's the thing I definitely
01:36:49
regret
01:36:51
you're still friends with that person
01:36:52
yeah best friend is that right
01:36:56
apologize to them now yeah I've
01:36:58
apologized many many times don't worry
01:37:01
it has not been forgotten
01:37:04
um when did you start to regret that
01:37:05
like was it immediately afterwards
01:37:07
just as I let the fuse
01:37:12
but there's no going back with fireworks
01:37:19
oh that is outrageous oh that is so
01:37:22
lucky that's yeah it's dodging a bullet
01:37:24
[ __ ] there for her man for you yeah
01:37:26
absolutely change the trajectory of so
01:37:28
many lives absolutely
01:37:30
um and and last one I know you're into
01:37:33
um uh like Eastern's sort of
01:37:35
spirituality and Buddhism
01:37:38
um what are your thoughts about um an
01:37:40
afterlife or anything what happens
01:37:43
that's actually something I think about
01:37:44
I don't think
01:37:46
I don't think there's an afterlife in
01:37:49
terms of of you functioning in any way
01:37:53
like you do on this Earth
01:37:56
um in terms of how your brain works how
01:37:58
thoughts work I think there's definitely
01:38:00
something that's beyond space and time
01:38:03
that creates energy everything in the
01:38:05
universe is energy We're Just Energy
01:38:08
that then turn into a different type of
01:38:11
energy I'm definitely believe in more of
01:38:15
a global Consciousness and I sort of
01:38:17
believe that when you die your conscious
01:38:19
goes into the Consciousness but I don't
01:38:22
know what happens I don't think you
01:38:24
communicate with people and who you used
01:38:26
to know and that sort of thing I think
01:38:28
you just
01:38:30
go into space I I'm really intrigued to
01:38:34
see what happened but um now I just
01:38:38
think you go back into the energy of the
01:38:40
universe and I love space I love the
01:38:42
Universe I think we are just blessed to
01:38:46
be here and I think people need to look
01:38:49
at
01:38:50
the miracle of Earth and life and just
01:38:54
step back
01:38:55
day-to-day conflicts and all that and go
01:38:58
in fact this is pretty amazing yeah and
01:39:00
we're only here for a very short time
01:39:02
even if you live the longest life it's a
01:39:05
DOT absolutely
01:39:08
hey well man it's been um wonderful
01:39:10
having you over here today oh such a
01:39:11
pleasure Dom I'm really sorry that you
01:39:14
of all people are going through this at
01:39:15
the moment but thanks for sharing your
01:39:17
stories and your lessons and
01:39:21
um hopefully you'll be around for a long
01:39:23
time yet yeah hopefully I'll come back
01:39:24
and have another chat on how to cure
01:39:26
cancer well if anyone can man I I mean
01:39:30
you're sitting in front of me at the
01:39:31
moment you look as good and as well and
01:39:33
as healthy as what I've ever seen you
01:39:34
before that's all I'm trying to do so
01:39:36
plump red cheeks yep right better Ruddy
01:39:40
sunshine just preparing for the next
01:39:43
Cyclone yeah no but congratulations on
01:39:45
everything you've done you've been like
01:39:47
an absolute treat for New Zealand for
01:39:48
the last 20 years and it's been so much
01:39:50
fun like watching your progression
01:39:53
um over those years and long may I
01:39:55
continue oh thanks Don love you dog
01:39:57
cheers
01:39:59
foreign
01:40:01
[Music]
