00:00:00
g'day and welcome to Runners only with
00:00:02
dom Harvey on this episode Brad smailer
00:00:05
part two it's just finding gratitude for
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yeah for the things that that we love
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about our lives and focusing on what is
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good so there is gratitude there but I I
00:00:16
don't know if I could ever say I'm
00:00:18
grateful for the injury itself
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that's just a tough one to yeah to get
00:00:23
through
00:00:24
yeah this is the very first of the
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podcast the very first repeat guest Brad
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was a guest on episode four of the
00:00:30
podcast way back in March 2022 this is
00:00:32
the first time we've had someone back
00:00:34
the first conversation with Brad is
00:00:36
still one of the most talked about
00:00:36
podcasts that I've done it doesn't
00:00:39
really matter if you haven't heard that
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one though you can dive straight into
00:00:41
this one
00:00:42
um I'll just give you a brief summary
00:00:44
about the amazing bread smeller and who
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he is eight years ago Brad had a life
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that a lot of people would have gladly
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traded for theirs he was one of the
00:00:51
world's best wakeboarders and he spent
00:00:53
his 20s chasing Summers and girls
00:00:56
actually to be more specific he um he
00:00:59
didn't have to do all that much chasing
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when it came to the ladies then in a
00:01:02
split second accident he ended up
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quadriplegic still the same Brain still
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the same personality still the same be
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rad but no feeling or movement from the
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neck down in this Split Second he went
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from being fiercely independent to being
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completely reliant on round-the-clock
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carers for even the most basic human
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functions like wiping away tears
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bread over the years has done some
00:01:22
intense work and acceptance to become
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the man he is today and now he has
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shared his entire journey in a brilliant
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book called owning it I didn't hesitate
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to get Brad back for a second chat
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because I think we can all get so much
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from Brad's journey and I hope you guys
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enjoy Brad's company as much as what I
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do if you like this chat maybe check out
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his book owning it he could have got a
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ghost writer or used voice memos but
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Brad's a perfectionist so he wrote every
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last letter using a math stylist and his
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iPhone whatever you're doing when you're
00:01:50
listening to this I hope you take a
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moment to reflect on just how lucky you
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are to be doing whatever you're doing
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driving walking
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running cycling vacuuming showering
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making the bed cutting your toenails
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whatever
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some of these things are called chores
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but if you can do these things you're
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lucky and the ability to do all of these
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things could be taken away at a moment
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all right let's get into it Brad snailer
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hey
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this is
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fast paced slow and steady anyway you
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coming up just wanna connect for
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everyone who loves running this is
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[Music]
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fast paced slow and steady anyway you
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coming just wanna connect for everyone
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who loves running hey Runners only with
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dom Harvey Runners only with Don Harvey
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and for the first time ever
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um a return guest Brett Smiler ah I'm
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honored to be back again and uh love to
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knock out the first so
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good to be back with you man yeah so um
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we by the way if anyone wants to um hear
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the the interview we did the first time
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around that was like um when the podcast
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launched like maybe February or March
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this year
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um I recorded the chat with you before
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the podcast had even launched you you
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asked nothing about it you were like
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sure come on your [ __ ] podcast so I
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came around home and we recorded it so
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if anyone wants to go back and listen to
00:03:17
that that hasn't already you're welcome
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to it feels like it's a different
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conversation to be had now um because I
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feel like I know so much more about you
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yeah it's um I mean A lot's happened
00:03:30
since that last uh last podcast our last
00:03:32
chat
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um I mean I haven't been many places
00:03:37
apart from in my bed I've been on bed
00:03:39
rest for about six months and had a
00:03:41
couple of surgeries and a few issues
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going on but through that time we got
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the book out we you know I finished
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editing I did the proofreading and got
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it out it's in stores in people's hands
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and you know you're most of the way
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through it now as well yeah yeah I I you
00:03:55
might be fooled by looking at my
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apartment because I've got boxes and
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boxes of books but I'm I buy books but
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the intention of reading them sort of
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flick through and then never commit and
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I thought it'd be the same with your
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book because it's bloody daunting it's a
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big read it's a mess it's Lord of the
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Rings size but um I've I've loved it man
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I'm so glad like and that that was yeah
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my one worry with how many pages there
00:04:16
are was that people would kind of be
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scared to pick it up off the shelves but
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uh from the you know the response I've
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had so far it's people when they start
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reading it they can't put it down so
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um that's yeah that's amazing feedback
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to get and I'm just really stoked with
00:04:31
the response so far yeah so much to talk
00:04:34
about with the book yeah first of all
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let's talk about your year so I saw you
00:04:37
maybe January or February this year at
00:04:39
your house at that time like we made a
00:04:41
commitment to each other that we were
00:04:42
going to like run run a marathon I was
00:04:44
going to push you in the the Red Bull
00:04:45
Wings for life but you've um you've had
00:04:47
a to put it bluntly a prick of a year
00:04:50
yeah it's been uh it's been really
00:04:52
challenging and to be going through just
00:04:55
some medical issues some health health
00:04:56
problems um you know bowel related stuff
00:04:59
that's just
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yeah it's kind of meant that I wasn't
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able to sit in my wheelchair at all I
00:05:04
wasn't able to tolerate it tolerate it I
00:05:07
know even when we had our chat last time
00:05:08
we had to pause every
00:05:10
10-15 minutes for me to be able to kind
00:05:12
of
00:05:13
um get my weight off my button and yeah
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kind of ease some of the symptoms that I
00:05:17
was getting
00:05:18
so that's that's improved you know I had
00:05:20
two surgeries actually the second one
00:05:22
was a repeat of the first one because it
00:05:24
wasn't fully successful so
00:05:26
things are getting better now I'm able
00:05:28
to be up in my chair a bit longer and
00:05:30
I've got one surgery to go follow-up
00:05:32
scans next week so we'll um see how
00:05:36
things are going but it's good to be
00:05:37
able to get up and out and
00:05:39
especially at this time you know the
00:05:40
books out I want to be able to do media
00:05:42
and you know we had the the book
00:05:43
launched last week and so um no it's
00:05:46
just great to be back up and and sort of
00:05:48
getting better again is this just the
00:05:51
life of a quadriplegic
00:05:54
pretty much yeah it's it's just kind of
00:05:56
got to be used to the fact that you get
00:05:57
[ __ ] thrown at you
00:05:59
new new issues new challenges
00:06:03
um
00:06:03
throughout you know and that's going to
00:06:05
be the case for the rest of my life I
00:06:06
think it's it's never going to be fully
00:06:08
under control where I have no further
00:06:11
issues it's just
00:06:12
I think it's just the way the way it is
00:06:14
and um you just kind of got to accept
00:06:16
that and do what we can what's the
00:06:19
longest you've gone feeling good
00:06:21
like is it three months six months yeah
00:06:24
probably something like that I know over
00:06:26
the years there's
00:06:27
you know every a couple of times a year
00:06:30
that I'll end up in hospital with a
00:06:31
bladder infection or actually there was
00:06:34
maybe a year or so where I didn't
00:06:36
um
00:06:37
but no it's yeah there's constantly
00:06:40
struggles with the situation and it's
00:06:43
just um just part of it and just trying
00:06:46
to keep on top of it as best I can and
00:06:48
you know I've got chronic pain so it
00:06:50
means I'm in pain at all times
00:06:53
um is that right like whereabouts uh my
00:06:55
whole body I've got like nerve pain so
00:06:57
neuropathic pain which is like sort of
00:06:59
like a pins and needles sort of tingling
00:07:01
sensation but it's it's unpleasant it's
00:07:04
like a burning cold Sensation that um
00:07:07
I would call it maybe a two to three out
00:07:09
of ten in terms of pain
00:07:11
um but it's kind of it's just there all
00:07:13
the time and then what can alleviate it
00:07:15
is there meat weed yeah cannabis Health
00:07:18
yes
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um
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I you know I'm on pregabalon which is in
00:07:23
nerve pain medication which helps and we
00:07:25
are about to do a review of my pain meds
00:07:27
and and just kind of make sure I'm
00:07:30
on the best thing that I can be on and
00:07:33
just try and get things under control
00:07:36
it's got to be frustrating as hell
00:07:38
it is yeah it is and it's one of those
00:07:41
things it's just I've just had to learn
00:07:43
what I do and don't have control of and
00:07:45
you know obviously my health I can
00:07:48
I can work on that and you know whatever
00:07:50
I'm eating and drinking and all that
00:07:52
sort of stuff and how I'm treating my
00:07:54
body but at the end of the day there are
00:07:56
some things that I just can't control
00:07:57
and I just need to do what I can and
00:08:01
make the best out of out of the life I
00:08:03
got and um so that's kind of
00:08:05
what the book's about really as well
00:08:07
yeah yeah it is I reckon maybe 75 80 of
00:08:11
the way through it I'm recording this on
00:08:13
the assumption that most people
00:08:15
listening to this probably haven't read
00:08:16
it yet and we want them to so I I'm sort
00:08:20
of torn this the things in the book
00:08:21
obviously that I want to talk about but
00:08:23
also I don't want to give away too many
00:08:24
too many spoilers but what I will say is
00:08:26
that the first 290 pages of the book 200
00:08:30
that by the way that's bigger than most
00:08:31
normal books on it so first 290 Pages
00:08:34
that's um that's Brad smailer
00:08:36
pre-accident yeah and so I really wanted
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to to give the full picture of what life
00:08:42
was like oh and you certainly did yeah
00:08:45
it didn't hold much back
00:08:47
um
00:08:48
what did you hold back I mean that what
00:08:52
ended up in the book is only half of
00:08:54
what I initially wrote so uh you know
00:08:56
the Publishers have read all the uh the
00:08:58
unfiltered version and it's um
00:09:01
yeah Mo you know we we kept it as raw as
00:09:04
possible and um but we just kind of
00:09:07
trimmed out the parts that weren't
00:09:09
necessary and kind of you know we've got
00:09:12
enough
00:09:13
um Talk of sex and things like that in
00:09:15
there that oh every other might flick
00:09:18
open to any page in this brand and it
00:09:19
says
00:09:20
yeah that was it you know I was just I
00:09:23
was a young you know young man of my
00:09:25
late teens early 20s and
00:09:27
you know traveling the world and I was
00:09:29
single and I you know I tried to have
00:09:31
some relationships and tried long
00:09:33
distance and it just didn't quite work
00:09:34
and
00:09:36
um didn't feel like I was in a position
00:09:37
to be able to like bring someone with me
00:09:39
and so yeah I was just living the single
00:09:41
life and tried to be as authentic about
00:09:43
that as possible and upfront with with
00:09:46
the woman that I was with and you know
00:09:47
obviously there were one night stands
00:09:49
and things like that but
00:09:51
um yeah it was just uh that was just
00:09:53
part of the life and I wanted to
00:09:55
to really paint that picture as
00:09:57
authentically as I can and give people
00:09:59
the real full story before the injury
00:10:02
happened so that then they can feel
00:10:05
how far I fell you know and how how hard
00:10:08
that hit me and and you know how much it
00:10:11
affected me in in many different ways
00:10:13
and I kind of really dig into that
00:10:16
um through the the last half of the book
00:10:18
as I was reading it I I don't know you
00:10:21
that well but I feel like through
00:10:23
following you on Instagram and meeting a
00:10:24
couple of times I know you're well
00:10:25
enough and I feel like everything you do
00:10:27
is quite purposeful so there must have
00:10:28
been a reason for that and I'm guessing
00:10:29
the reason is to like paint a very very
00:10:31
Vivid picture of what your life was like
00:10:33
pre-accident but I'm there's probably
00:10:35
going to be a lot of women in particular
00:10:36
that'll read it that'll think you're an
00:10:38
ass totally and that's semi by Design
00:10:40
you know like you've got to show growth
00:10:42
throughout a story like this
00:10:45
um you know and that was a growth that I
00:10:46
that I made in my life and you know and
00:10:49
and then you know talking about sex as
00:10:50
well like a sex pre-injury and post
00:10:52
injury and part of the reason for that
00:10:54
was people are very intrigued about
00:10:57
spinal cord injury and Kanye shut up
00:11:01
what's going on Kanye hey what's up but
00:11:04
no people are very interested about like
00:11:06
can I have sex what can I feel what what
00:11:09
what's that experience like so again I
00:11:13
wanted the full story I wanted people to
00:11:15
you know I didn't want to hold anything
00:11:16
back and so kind of wanted that
00:11:18
comparison of pre-injury and post injury
00:11:21
with sex was like and relationships and
00:11:24
even like how much I focused on you know
00:11:28
and how much importance I put on
00:11:30
um sex and and stuff before the accident
00:11:32
leads into the issues that came about
00:11:35
afterwards and how much that affected me
00:11:37
when you know I had all these feelings
00:11:39
of inadequacy and you know not being
00:11:41
able to to do what I used to be able to
00:11:43
do and constantly comparing and and just
00:11:45
how that that can have a really negative
00:11:47
effect
00:11:48
um on us mentally and so
00:11:50
yeah you know I was sort of a bit like
00:11:53
oh well mum's gonna read this book so
00:11:56
um but she knows me you know I lived at
00:11:58
home with her she heard the girl
00:11:59
sneaking out in the morning and things
00:12:01
like that and so you know it is what it
00:12:03
is and and look if people get to the end
00:12:06
of the book and they still judge me
00:12:07
negatively then that that's that's fine
00:12:09
that's on them I I don't think there'll
00:12:11
be many people that will I hope they you
00:12:13
know see the growth that was made and
00:12:15
understand the reasoning for putting it
00:12:17
in there and I think especially young
00:12:19
men will be able to learn a few things
00:12:21
around the effect that having too much
00:12:25
importance on sex how detrimental that
00:12:29
can be later in life especially when
00:12:30
getting into relationships and stuff so
00:12:32
one thing no one can um accuse you of
00:12:34
not being as authentic and I I think
00:12:36
there's something really powerful about
00:12:38
that but it is what there's one part of
00:12:40
the book where you're seeing a girl for
00:12:41
a few months and you know you decide
00:12:43
you're not going to see each other
00:12:44
anymore and you have a last night
00:12:45
together then 12 hours later you're in
00:12:47
LA with another girl picking you up and
00:12:49
then while you're with her you're
00:12:50
messaging someone
00:12:56
she drops you off at the airport and she
00:12:58
asks you for petrol money which seems
00:13:00
kind of rude but I was really going she
00:13:03
knows that you've been messaging some
00:13:04
other girl oh she might have I don't
00:13:06
really know she knew it was just a flyby
00:13:08
visit it's just one of those things um
00:13:11
I uh you know and the other girl I was
00:13:13
messaging was like one that I really
00:13:14
wanted you know and it it was just it
00:13:17
was one of these things that like
00:13:19
I don't know it's it's just part of like
00:13:22
when I was traveling the us as well like
00:13:25
it was something like obviously I
00:13:27
enjoyed like meeting women and things
00:13:29
like that but you know you fly in you
00:13:31
get someone pick you up and you can like
00:13:33
you know somewhere to somewhere to crash
00:13:35
like I was Balling on a budget over
00:13:37
there like I I really um
00:13:40
didn't have the money to go and pay for
00:13:42
hotels and all the stuff I had to you
00:13:44
know save as much as I could and not
00:13:47
that I was like using sleeping with
00:13:49
women to for accommodation it was just
00:13:52
it wasn't it wasn't to that extent but
00:13:54
it was a bonus and it was um you know
00:13:56
and and I just enjoyed living the life
00:13:59
and and kind of
00:14:01
um taking every opportunity I could and
00:14:03
it's just how it was that was probably
00:14:05
one big surprise for me so um you were a
00:14:08
very very successful wakeboarder like um
00:14:10
what would your world ranking be would
00:14:12
you say uh top 20 top 10 would have been
00:14:15
in the top 20 most years on the pro tour
00:14:17
problem with that is you know being a
00:14:19
niche sport like unless you're in the
00:14:20
top 10 you're not even making money yeah
00:14:22
that's the thing there's no money you're
00:14:23
writing off your credit card totally
00:14:25
that was also part of
00:14:29
my situation in the sport I most of the
00:14:33
the guys I was competing against are
00:14:34
like
00:14:35
rich kids with mum and dad paying the
00:14:37
bill yeah sure they live on a lake in
00:14:39
Florida they don't have to worry about
00:14:40
anything but training whereas I was
00:14:43
having a you know think about where my
00:14:46
next meal was coming from sometimes and
00:14:48
there's even a couple of moments you
00:14:49
would have read you know when I got
00:14:51
second at Worlds in South Korea
00:14:54
and then got drug tested and lost my
00:14:56
medal and I lost thirty thousand dollars
00:14:58
in funding which that was my leg up that
00:15:01
was exactly what I needed
00:15:03
but I [ __ ] that up but yeah that was
00:15:06
just that was just my journey it was uh
00:15:08
it was a it was a muscle man another
00:15:10
hard journey you know yeah so and then
00:15:13
so after 290 pages of um your life
00:15:16
pre-accident which is like completely a
00:15:19
complete 180 to how your life is now you
00:15:21
talk about the time in hospital [ __ ]
00:15:22
that sounds awful I I had covert earlier
00:15:25
this year and I had one sleep this night
00:15:27
where I couldn't swallow you you were
00:15:28
living that life for like a month six
00:15:29
weeks yeah I had a month of being on a
00:15:31
ventilator and so you can't swallow you
00:15:34
can't eat you can't drink everything's
00:15:35
going through a feeding tube up through
00:15:37
your nose and yeah I was being on a
00:15:40
ventilator you have a tube going down
00:15:41
into my lungs I had pneumonia I had
00:15:44
yeah loads of issues my heart stopped
00:15:47
once I pretty much died in front of my
00:15:48
mum it was like just the most hellish
00:15:51
situation you know there were some
00:15:53
incredible nurses and people that I met
00:15:55
that really
00:15:57
helped me through that time and really
00:15:59
just made it a little less unpleasant
00:16:01
there were some nurses where I just was
00:16:03
like I don't want you in my room
00:16:06
um you know ones that come in and say
00:16:08
okay I can't speak but it doesn't mean
00:16:09
I'm deaf you don't need to speak to me
00:16:11
like I can't hear you or like I'm a
00:16:13
child or whatever and
00:16:16
um but yeah that was that was pretty
00:16:18
sure
00:16:20
um you know at times when I was in that
00:16:22
situation I didn't even want to continue
00:16:24
living really I was just like didn't
00:16:27
want to didn't want to go through it I
00:16:29
knew the better I had ahead of me
00:16:31
um
00:16:32
and it was all just future-based fears
00:16:34
that worried about what life would be
00:16:36
like as a quadriplegic and couldn't
00:16:39
accept it and
00:16:41
um had all these fears around you know
00:16:43
being miserable and
00:16:45
life not being worth living and and so
00:16:47
yeah it was just amazing to have the
00:16:49
community and wakewood Community my
00:16:51
family and friends and stuff that really
00:16:53
helped me turn that around and fight so
00:16:56
so from from where you're sitting now to
00:16:58
we were lying then but with those with
00:17:00
those fears unfounded or
00:17:04
um I mean some of them were warranted
00:17:05
but it wasn't you know I just thought
00:17:08
that
00:17:09
there would be no possibility there'd be
00:17:10
no fun there'd be no
00:17:13
um Adventure
00:17:15
um I didn't think any woman would want
00:17:17
me
00:17:18
and so yeah a lot of those I'll proved
00:17:20
wrong
00:17:21
um
00:17:22
I was very surprised to have like you
00:17:24
know beautiful woman fall in love with
00:17:26
me after my accent who didn't know me
00:17:29
beforehand I was like geez and I was you
00:17:31
know as you would have read I was in a
00:17:33
pretty confused and and
00:17:36
um just scattered sort of situation at
00:17:38
that point and
00:17:40
you know screwed a few things up
00:17:42
um but that was just me kind of fumbling
00:17:45
and failing I think that's actually the
00:17:46
name of the chapter
00:17:48
um you know my wife I said the one where
00:17:50
you've got a couple of girls on the go
00:17:51
one that you knew pre-accident and one
00:17:54
that you met post accident yeah and I
00:17:55
just I I was already in love with the
00:17:58
girl I knew before and but then I met
00:18:00
this incredible woman afterwards and I
00:18:04
was sort of like you know it was like I
00:18:06
was already trying to get the first one
00:18:07
back and then I met the new one didn't
00:18:09
realize I didn't even think she'd be
00:18:11
into me she falls for me and I was like
00:18:13
whoa I'm kind of like which way do I go
00:18:15
here and and then you know
00:18:18
um I've kind of felt like I've almost
00:18:20
put some fears of my future on to them
00:18:23
like and and kind of almost made like
00:18:25
the new girl was
00:18:27
my fears of the future and
00:18:30
and the the girl that I knew before like
00:18:32
it was my comfort in the past and what I
00:18:35
knew and what I wanted back so yeah I
00:18:38
just kind of like didn't know what to do
00:18:39
in that point it was very confusing
00:18:40
they're both incredible women but still
00:18:42
I'm still in my life still friends and
00:18:45
and just great people so
00:18:47
um yeah it was just
00:18:49
a lot to be scared of at the beginning
00:18:51
and anyone would be frightened in that
00:18:54
situation and I just um yeah just had to
00:18:57
fight for a while I had to have physical
00:18:59
rehab to focus on to to get me through
00:19:02
it and um
00:19:03
that was sort of the turning point and
00:19:06
I had to change my mindset and there was
00:19:09
a lot I learned from Susie yeah I'm
00:19:11
going through that at the moment yeah
00:19:12
we'll get to Susie I want to learn more
00:19:14
about her what an incredible woman but
00:19:16
one thing just an observation so I went
00:19:19
to your book launch last weekend and uh
00:19:22
there are a lot of beautiful women in
00:19:23
the room and her being halfway through
00:19:25
your book at that point I was looking
00:19:26
around trying to like put faces and
00:19:29
names and things but I thought that
00:19:31
Officer says a lot about you and the way
00:19:34
you respected or treated or ended
00:19:36
relationships with women that so many of
00:19:37
them were in the room yeah yeah I mean
00:19:39
they're all you know the majority of
00:19:42
them are people I've stayed in contact
00:19:43
with and remain friends with
00:19:46
um and as I think I even write it in the
00:19:48
book at my my birthday after my accident
00:19:50
it's like it wouldn't be a a b-rad party
00:19:52
without auckland's finest
00:19:55
um oh so that was at the Cavalier which
00:19:57
is um about like 400 meters from where
00:19:59
we're sitting now and you had like a
00:20:00
like a moment of sadness wash over you
00:20:02
where you realize that these girls that
00:20:04
once look looked at you like with sort
00:20:06
of you know thirsty afis we're now
00:20:08
looking at you with eyes of petty do you
00:20:10
think that was actually how they were
00:20:12
looking at you or in hindsight is that
00:20:13
your internal perception I think most of
00:20:17
it was the internal perception but then
00:20:18
there's also the reality of my situation
00:20:21
you know it isn't something that women
00:20:23
are you know or it might be something
00:20:25
that would deter women
00:20:27
um you know it's not something anyone
00:20:28
thinks of when they're growing up is you
00:20:31
know you you picture the white picket
00:20:33
fence and the family and everything
00:20:35
being perfect which it never really
00:20:37
turns out to be there's always
00:20:39
challenges there's always things that
00:20:40
are different to the way we plan but
00:20:43
um yeah I I'm I'm
00:20:46
completely accepting of the fact that I
00:20:48
I know that my situation isn't what most
00:20:51
people would choose and choosing someone
00:20:54
and getting into a relationship with and
00:20:56
saying that you know there are as I said
00:20:58
there have been women who see past the
00:21:00
chair and they see you know see me for
00:21:02
who I am and and are happy to come along
00:21:05
for the ride and learn about the
00:21:07
challenges and figure out new ways of
00:21:10
doing things and
00:21:12
um so yeah I think there's a bit of both
00:21:13
at that party I'd say like you know the
00:21:16
eyes of Desire probably weren't there
00:21:17
anymore
00:21:19
um you know they're probably still
00:21:21
a bit of respect and a bit of you know
00:21:23
looking at me with admiration of being
00:21:25
able to get through what I've been
00:21:27
through but yeah I'd say things probably
00:21:29
changed a bit there in terms of the way
00:21:31
I was seen but that was just for me I
00:21:34
needed to learn
00:21:36
and and grow my own confidence again and
00:21:38
learn to love myself again
00:21:40
in order to feel worthy and feel loved I
00:21:43
had a a maid of my Kerry Suter on the
00:21:46
the show earlier this earlier this year
00:21:48
um so he was big in the running
00:21:50
community and he went from a mountain
00:21:51
bike ride in February this year in
00:21:53
Rotorua and ended up in a similar
00:21:54
situation to you and he said when he he
00:21:56
was in the spinal unit but very early on
00:21:59
but they basically told him that there's
00:22:01
no hope like there's there's no [ __ ]
00:22:03
hope you're not getting your legs back
00:22:04
you're not walking again you're not
00:22:06
running again get used to that idea you
00:22:09
I followed you on Instagram you um you
00:22:11
rehabbed [ __ ] hard for years
00:22:13
afterwards like every day on Instagram
00:22:15
you'd be like grinding away in the gym
00:22:16
were you given the same sort of speech
00:22:18
that he was like there's there's no hope
00:22:20
or is they just growing stubbornness I
00:22:22
guess or no I was told um no chance of
00:22:25
walking again one to two percent chance
00:22:26
of getting up on function so this was
00:22:28
just your Defiance like yeah it was like
00:22:31
well you don't know me you don't know
00:22:32
how hard I'm willing to work you don't
00:22:34
know how determined I am and and you
00:22:36
know one to two percent like I've I've
00:22:39
been up against those it's odds my whole
00:22:41
career like in terms of the tricks I was
00:22:43
trying I was some you know random kid
00:22:45
from New Zealand who was barely even
00:22:46
sponsored land the fourth fourth 1080 in
00:22:49
the world so
00:22:51
um you know and and putting myself up
00:22:52
there with the biggest names and so that
00:22:55
was my mentality I was just like well
00:22:57
I'm just gonna fight I'm gonna do what I
00:22:59
can to get that back and yeah I remember
00:23:00
obviously hearing about Carrie's
00:23:03
accidents and I spoke with him and his
00:23:05
partner um while I was in the spiral
00:23:07
unit yeah yeah um yeah so that was you
00:23:10
know that's something I try to do as
00:23:12
well as if I can in any way help and I
00:23:15
know how scary those first
00:23:17
weeks and months and stuff are in the
00:23:19
spinal units and so yeah I try to help
00:23:22
out in any way I can and just chat to
00:23:25
them about like my journey and and what
00:23:27
I've been through and been how to
00:23:29
accomplish and because I you know I
00:23:31
never want to go in and go hey this is
00:23:32
how your life's going to be because it's
00:23:33
just not true I can't tell anyone that
00:23:36
um and that's 100 what I didn't want
00:23:38
when I had my injury I was like I don't
00:23:40
want someone in a wheelchair coming in
00:23:42
and tell me what my life's going to be
00:23:43
like but so that's how I try to approach
00:23:45
it just openly and just have a good chat
00:23:48
and um it's definitely a scary and
00:23:50
daunting time in the spinal unit but
00:23:53
there's progress to be made and and it
00:23:55
doesn't always have to be in the way
00:23:56
that we think it's going to be I I
00:23:58
thought my progress was going to be in
00:24:00
physical and it wasn't and yeah I just
00:24:03
had to make that shift
00:24:05
just getting the sweats a little bit
00:24:07
it's getting a bit of a sweat can you
00:24:08
just check my bag see if it's draining
00:24:10
it is is there much in it completely
00:24:13
full
00:24:14
I can check the fan on if you want no
00:24:16
it's not a type of thing it's gorgeous
00:24:18
my body's response
00:24:20
yeah all good we'll see how that goes
00:24:22
for a little while
00:24:25
um all right we just had a break then
00:24:27
just to wipe the sweat off your brow and
00:24:29
change your catheter and I'll tell you
00:24:32
what's while um your caregiver was doing
00:24:34
that I I I've had a bit of a cough and I
00:24:36
managed to cough myself and I just went
00:24:38
for a piss myself and after speaking
00:24:40
with you it just reminds me of those
00:24:42
little things that we just do
00:24:44
automatically as humans and you take for
00:24:45
granted and it makes me appreciate
00:24:48
um how lucky I am to better do all that
00:24:50
yeah like I can't even cough really if I
00:24:52
you know that's one thing if I get a
00:24:54
chest infection or if I got covered like
00:24:56
it's you know I'm at a pretty decent
00:24:58
risk like I've got great you know great
00:25:00
respiratory system I can hold my breath
00:25:02
for a long time I got good lungs but I
00:25:04
don't have the ab strength like cough
00:25:06
and you know push um to push a good
00:25:09
cough out so yeah it's just it's part of
00:25:12
it you know catheters and recently I had
00:25:14
to get a colostomy bag which was
00:25:16
something I wanted to avoid at all costs
00:25:17
but was that no one wants a bag you know
00:25:20
the poo on the outside it's like it's
00:25:22
just my main fears around it were is it
00:25:26
going to limit me from activities and
00:25:28
Adventure like freediving and things
00:25:31
like that and the second one was around
00:25:32
intimacy which again you know I've
00:25:35
already got a catheter that sort of
00:25:36
comes out from below my belly button and
00:25:39
it's just one of those things that's
00:25:40
just kind of mentally just didn't want
00:25:42
to kind of have to end up with and I
00:25:45
think like you know I really like to
00:25:46
approach things with as much realism as
00:25:49
possible and kind of being realistic
00:25:51
about knowing that someone in a
00:25:54
wheelchair isn't the first
00:25:56
kind of most attractive thing that
00:25:57
someone's going to go for but like if
00:26:00
I've accepted that from from the
00:26:01
beginning and if I'm going out and I'm
00:26:03
like considering approaching someone you
00:26:06
know like
00:26:07
talking to women and things like that if
00:26:10
I go out out into that situation
00:26:12
accepting that I know rejection is a
00:26:15
high possibility
00:26:17
um if you accept that from the beginning
00:26:19
then it's way less daunting
00:26:22
um even if you like as a if you do get
00:26:24
rejected a lot of the time you're like
00:26:26
ah it wasn't as bad as what I thought
00:26:28
and built it up to be and then you know
00:26:31
obviously there's the other side where
00:26:32
you don't but um don't get it rejected
00:26:35
you end up chatting with someone and you
00:26:37
know you just never know what people are
00:26:39
open to and at the end of the day if I
00:26:41
don't put myself out there then I'm not
00:26:42
going to have that opportunity so it's
00:26:44
his social media and aspects like that
00:26:48
made it easier and the respect that I
00:26:49
suppose you can meet someone not fully
00:26:51
like put your cards on the table and
00:26:53
then if they're into you they can
00:26:54
message you the next day
00:26:55
um I've found like with social media
00:26:57
that mainly the girls that are
00:26:58
interested in and suffer overseas right
00:27:01
I feel like there's that little bit of a
00:27:02
barrier like a buffer where it's like
00:27:04
the complete reality of my situation
00:27:06
isn't there
00:27:09
um you know it's not front and center
00:27:10
that they can just have a bit of fun
00:27:12
flirty time yeah and they're getting to
00:27:13
know like just me and my personality not
00:27:16
everything and all the challenges
00:27:18
I don't know if that's really a good
00:27:20
thing or not it could be you know it
00:27:22
could be that stepping stone toward
00:27:23
meeting someone and
00:27:25
um you know I haven't haven't gone into
00:27:26
dating apps or anything like that
00:27:29
um
00:27:29
the the last few girlfriends and
00:27:32
relationships have been in
00:27:34
um have been you know very authentic
00:27:36
meetings and
00:27:38
um you know you meet them out and about
00:27:40
at events or yeah out in public so um
00:27:45
I you look I'll be honest there's been a
00:27:46
bit of a dry a dry spell lately and um
00:27:50
that's just reality obviously through
00:27:52
covert times and things like that the
00:27:53
DMS are open
00:27:56
but no it's um it's just it is what it
00:28:00
is it's a big change from how things
00:28:01
were before but you know it's just I've
00:28:04
changed my my focus on what's important
00:28:06
as well and I know that you know the the
00:28:09
right one will come along and you know I
00:28:11
just I I don't go into those situations
00:28:14
like scared of
00:28:16
if it'll work or if it won't and trying
00:28:19
to have faith that the thing that will
00:28:22
work or the the right one will come
00:28:23
along
00:28:24
and if we try and fail that's just part
00:28:27
of the journey and getting there so when
00:28:30
we when we spoke at the beginning of
00:28:31
this year we sort of we sort of touched
00:28:33
upon this but I I feel like you know it
00:28:35
was sort of delicately approached but
00:28:37
now that I've read the book I feel like
00:28:38
it's it's it's all out there so you can
00:28:41
you can still get an erection but it's
00:28:42
not
00:28:43
it's not thought based so it's not
00:28:45
activated by your brain yeah so if
00:28:47
someone brushes past you you could you
00:28:49
could get bowed up well you've got no
00:28:51
you've got no sort of feeling to speak
00:28:53
of no direct feeling I mean what I
00:28:55
describe it in the book is like two
00:28:57
percent of what I used to feel like
00:28:58
there is something there's a tiny bit of
00:29:01
feeling there
00:29:02
um but yeah I can basically I can start
00:29:04
but I can't finish if you put it that
00:29:06
way and so it's like
00:29:08
um but yeah thought and visuals don't
00:29:14
um the the message doesn't get through
00:29:15
there I mean there might be some you
00:29:18
know but it's more
00:29:20
at the end of the day it could you know
00:29:22
I'm probably more likely to get a you
00:29:24
know to get it up if
00:29:26
someone's trying to you know position my
00:29:29
underwear right and accidentally brush
00:29:30
past it could be a man it could be a
00:29:32
female it doesn't matter uh my body
00:29:34
doesn't make any distinguish between
00:29:37
those
00:29:38
um you know versus like there could be
00:29:40
some beautiful woman dancing in front of
00:29:42
me naked and it's not going to get me
00:29:43
but up so it's it's just a um yeah just
00:29:47
part of the the learnings of all the
00:29:49
different things that my injury
00:29:53
um has and brings to my my life so have
00:29:55
you not had an orgasm since the accident
00:29:57
no that's going to be over eight years
00:29:59
and counting it's gonna be a just Nami
00:30:01
eventually not not a wet dream no
00:30:04
nothing
00:30:05
um I mean there's you know times I've
00:30:06
seen like this you know there's a little
00:30:07
bit of um pre stuff coming you know
00:30:10
going on but like but the doctors said
00:30:12
basically there's a possibility of
00:30:14
getting there of of being able to have
00:30:16
an orgasm
00:30:17
um
00:30:18
but it's um
00:30:21
the way I view it's one of those things
00:30:22
is you've got to try to to get there and
00:30:26
um you know we've tried and it's just
00:30:29
it's one of those things that's you
00:30:31
never know like the doctors say maybe
00:30:32
it's like 50 50 if you if I'll be able
00:30:34
to or not so I don't know on what side
00:30:35
of that I'll land but I'm not scared to
00:30:37
try so when you're when you're lying
00:30:40
there and a girl hops on does it feel
00:30:42
nice physically or is it just like a
00:30:44
nice nice mental thing because you know
00:30:46
you're being intimate with someone I
00:30:47
think that that two percent of feeling
00:30:48
is is actual physical feeling like it's
00:30:52
as I said before I be you know I'm
00:30:54
paying all the time over these nerve
00:30:55
pains and everything so everything below
00:30:57
my net level of injury which is sort of
00:30:59
a line across my chest just above nipple
00:31:02
line
00:31:03
um everything below that
00:31:05
constantly feels negative you know it's
00:31:08
it's pain it's unpleasant so that's kind
00:31:11
of one of the only times I ever feel
00:31:12
anything Pleasant below the level of
00:31:14
injury and it's very minor it's very
00:31:17
subtle but it's something but then you
00:31:19
know the visual as well and just the
00:31:20
experience and that was something that
00:31:22
you know as you will have read I I
00:31:23
really had to mentally overcome
00:31:26
that comparison of what it used to be
00:31:28
before focusing constantly on what I
00:31:31
can't do I can't reach up and touch and
00:31:33
feel and you know and move around
00:31:35
positions and all that sort of stuff
00:31:37
which was that's what sex was for me
00:31:39
before and that's what it was programmed
00:31:41
into my mind as so it felt like less it
00:31:45
felt like
00:31:46
it wasn't something I was able to enjoy
00:31:48
at the beginning because I was
00:31:50
constantly battling these thoughts in my
00:31:52
head even though what was happening in
00:31:54
front of me and on top of me was
00:31:56
beautiful and something that I was
00:31:58
really um obviously happy with and but
00:32:00
yeah it's just that kind of mental
00:32:02
struggle that I had to get over for a
00:32:04
while there and it became more about
00:32:06
like rather than focusing on what I
00:32:07
can't do it's about looking at what I
00:32:09
can do being grateful for what I have
00:32:11
and what I what I'm able to do and um so
00:32:14
it's the more you direct your intention
00:32:17
and your focus onto
00:32:19
the positive
00:32:21
um I think just yeah puts us in a
00:32:22
positive mindset and lets us enjoy those
00:32:25
things as opposed to comparing it
00:32:26
against like
00:32:27
something else you've done in the past
00:32:29
and we can all do that you know like if
00:32:31
you even if you're out on a hike and
00:32:35
it's like things aren't quite going as
00:32:36
great as they were if you're constantly
00:32:38
focusing on
00:32:39
the best hike you've ever had and most
00:32:41
fun you've ever had in that adventure
00:32:43
and going oh this isn't that this isn't
00:32:45
you know it's just it puts a negative
00:32:47
spin on things rather than focusing on
00:32:49
the moment yeah there's a saying I
00:32:51
really like that um the comparison is
00:32:53
the theft of joy and it's so true so
00:32:55
true with all aspects do you want to be
00:32:57
a dad one day around being a father
00:32:59
there's fears around that there's
00:33:01
hurdles and and things that like people
00:33:04
have done it before and that's why I'm
00:33:06
like okay you know I can I can do that
00:33:08
I've gone through so many other
00:33:09
challenges and what do you mean fears
00:33:11
and hurdles what are you having a child
00:33:13
you can't even hold in your arms yeah
00:33:14
you know like not being able to
00:33:16
physically like teach them things and
00:33:19
play catch and teach them to skateboard
00:33:22
and
00:33:22
all these things that I was like I can't
00:33:24
do this like and that's what a father is
00:33:27
supposed to be but then again that was
00:33:30
kind of what Susie and I dug into and
00:33:31
and belief systems is what is a father
00:33:34
well some people have great fathers some
00:33:37
people have shitty fathers some people
00:33:39
don't have a father at all that's in
00:33:40
their life so
00:33:42
I'm just comparing things with how my
00:33:44
life was and my upbringing was and how
00:33:46
my dad was in my life and you know there
00:33:49
are so many women out there that are
00:33:50
raising a child on their own you know
00:33:52
and and to be able to be a pillar of
00:33:55
support and you know to to be able to be
00:33:59
a part of that but maybe not be
00:34:01
exactly what my father was to me in
00:34:04
terms of a lot of those things you know
00:34:06
it's just kind of a a mental hurdle that
00:34:08
I need to overcome and I know that like
00:34:11
even the learnings of my book don't
00:34:13
project your thoughts and fears too far
00:34:15
forward because we don't know what that
00:34:17
situation is actually going to be until
00:34:19
you're in it that's just all that is is
00:34:21
just fear so yeah that's that's
00:34:23
something that I'm you know I'm Keen to
00:34:25
have and
00:34:26
um
00:34:27
but you never know like obviously I I
00:34:29
thought my life was going to work out
00:34:31
the way everyone does and you think
00:34:32
you're gonna
00:34:34
find a partner and have kids together
00:34:35
but I mean how many people
00:34:38
end up with a partner who's already got
00:34:39
a child and you end up being like a
00:34:41
stepfather and you know like that's just
00:34:43
that's just as normal as what we all
00:34:46
picture as the perfect happy family so
00:34:49
it's just a switch in in belief systems
00:34:51
in the way we approach life and
00:34:54
just have to be open to different
00:34:56
possibilities and things yeah working
00:34:58
out in a different way to what we might
00:35:00
think they will working out the way
00:35:02
they're supposed to work out yeah well
00:35:03
yeah curio I mentioned before her head
00:35:05
on has um as part of Ali like she's
00:35:07
pregnant at the moment yeah I mean he
00:35:09
was saying that the morning of the
00:35:10
accident she was going out for a Lake
00:35:11
Swim he was going out for a mountain
00:35:12
bike ride so she was in the first
00:35:14
trimester at the time he he burst into
00:35:16
tears during our chat just saying
00:35:18
basically what you said like he's not
00:35:20
gonna be able to hold his kid
00:35:21
um there's he doesn't know what his life
00:35:23
expectancy is like yeah all these things
00:35:25
it was um broke my heart yeah and it is
00:35:28
it's it's scary and it's um it's
00:35:31
something that you know is is I think
00:35:33
even with anyone that I'd get into a
00:35:36
relationship with if it's something that
00:35:38
they want and they'd probably have these
00:35:40
ideas and thoughts and fears around it
00:35:42
as well so you know I think the main
00:35:44
thing is just being open to seeing what
00:35:46
life throws at us and and knowing that
00:35:49
you know even before saying like what
00:35:51
life is supposed to be or what is
00:35:53
supposed like what that's just a figment
00:35:56
of our imagination it's it's these
00:35:59
beliefs and ideas that have kind of
00:36:02
been ingrained into us from when we're
00:36:04
young and so many of those aren't
00:36:06
entirely valid you know so I mean so
00:36:09
much of it's around
00:36:10
body image and what we should look like
00:36:13
we're humans we're all we come in all
00:36:16
shapes and sizes and forms and I you
00:36:19
know I'm kind of trying to embrace the
00:36:21
idea that there is no should and there
00:36:24
is no supposed to be like this just what
00:36:26
we're building up in our mind and it's
00:36:28
it's just what is like that's the the
00:36:31
only reality the only truth is here and
00:36:34
now and what is everything else outside
00:36:36
of that is just the stories that our
00:36:39
minds like to tell us it's amazing how
00:36:42
how our minds like to do that and they
00:36:45
they sway from the present the moments
00:36:48
away from reality so much which you know
00:36:50
there's there's some positives to that
00:36:52
in terms of being creative and you know
00:36:55
progressing certain Technologies and
00:36:57
this and that if you're not a dreamer
00:36:58
you can't dream up these ideas and
00:37:00
things but you know a lot of the time we
00:37:03
really need to pull things back into
00:37:04
focus into the present and and just yeah
00:37:07
and try not to let our emotions kind of
00:37:10
go too far forward into the future or
00:37:12
back into the past yeah that feels like
00:37:14
enthusiasm it seems like you've got a
00:37:16
lot from a lot from here we'll get into
00:37:18
it first of all I want to well another
00:37:19
thing Kerry said to me just while I'm
00:37:21
thinking of it so when I saw him he was
00:37:23
like two to three months into into his
00:37:25
journey and a chair
00:37:26
um so it's very early days and his
00:37:28
parting message for something like any
00:37:30
any day where you can wake up in the
00:37:31
morning and evacuate your own Bells is a
00:37:34
good day now you've um your years and
00:37:37
years down the track now you try talk
00:37:38
about this process in the book so what
00:37:40
does an average day look like for you
00:37:42
from start to finish so well it's it's
00:37:44
changed a bit now and you know there's
00:37:46
stuff I talk about in the book like when
00:37:48
I went back to the spinal unit with the
00:37:49
pains that I was dealing with the high
00:37:51
blood pressure and everything from my
00:37:52
morning bowel care routine which
00:37:54
involved you know basically getting
00:37:56
turned on my side have a suppository put
00:37:58
up my butt and you know you kind of wait
00:38:01
and let it do its thing but then part of
00:38:03
it
00:38:03
you know it doesn't always like evacuate
00:38:05
your bowels completely and I needed a
00:38:07
caregiver to like glove up put some lube
00:38:09
on their finger digital yeah it's quite
00:38:12
actually quite funny and it makes like
00:38:14
some digital thing and you didn't you
00:38:16
thought it was something to do with
00:38:17
technology you know and then the the
00:38:19
doctor you know the nurse like waves his
00:38:21
fingers around like that he's like
00:38:23
digits
00:38:24
um and so yeah I had to overcome that
00:38:28
that was pretty daunting
00:38:30
um and but it became a part of my
00:38:31
everyday life to have my caregivers
00:38:33
helping me evacuate my bowels and so how
00:38:35
long does it take so they put the
00:38:37
suppositories up and then so so just
00:38:39
wait like first
00:38:40
initially you you put the suppository in
00:38:42
and you get up into your into your
00:38:45
shower commode chair which has a hole
00:38:47
underneath it you can position that over
00:38:50
the toilet and you sit there and you
00:38:51
wait for things to to fall out I end up
00:38:54
going through some issues end up with
00:38:55
hemorrhoids and some bleeding and some
00:38:57
other other issues going on so I had to
00:38:59
go back to doing my bowel cures in bed
00:39:01
which another was another hurdle I'm
00:39:02
like [ __ ] in the bed every morning but
00:39:04
obviously you put down uh plastic sheets
00:39:07
yeah all the stuff you need and um keep
00:39:10
it all clean but so I had to go back to
00:39:11
that and then went back to the spinal
00:39:13
unit because my you know I end up with
00:39:15
autonomic dysreflexia from that like
00:39:17
it's uh my body telling me that
00:39:19
something's not right it shoots my blood
00:39:22
pressure up it's pretty much my my body
00:39:24
feeling pain that I can't feel
00:39:27
um and it the signal is putting my blood
00:39:29
pressure up so I get the sweats which is
00:39:31
why we had to pause before I had a
00:39:33
little bit of a sweat going
00:39:34
and then yeah my blood pressure was
00:39:36
getting to the point I was almost
00:39:37
getting like 200 over 100 every every
00:39:39
morning and it's like verging on
00:39:42
um you know risking having a stroke so I
00:39:45
went back to the spinal unit and they I
00:39:48
thought they were going to really
00:39:48
address the problem but they sent me
00:39:51
home with a patch that I put on my arm
00:39:52
which helped keep my blood pressure down
00:39:54
but then yeah so that kind of led to
00:39:56
like I'm dealing with the these issues
00:39:58
and we don't really know what it is
00:40:00
um but then since the book's finished
00:40:02
quarter of the way through last year
00:40:04
started getting more pains again just
00:40:05
from sitting in my chair and it wasn't
00:40:07
until the start of the year that I um we
00:40:09
diagnosed it and so it turns out to be a
00:40:12
what's called a perianal fistula I mean
00:40:14
you don't like to say the word anal
00:40:16
fistula because two words back to back
00:40:19
doesn't really sound you know it paints
00:40:21
a different picture
00:40:22
but yeah it's a it's an issue that um
00:40:25
it's basically an infection that burrows
00:40:27
another tunnel that is not supposed to
00:40:29
be there and it ends up full of
00:40:30
infection and just nastiness and so you
00:40:34
had to deal with that had surgeries
00:40:36
um this year I've had two so far I've
00:40:37
got one more to go and it's just
00:40:39
part of it and part of that surgery was
00:40:41
to get a colostomy bag so I no longer
00:40:43
have to go through the around about two
00:40:45
hours every morning it took wow that I'd
00:40:47
be just sweating and uncomfortable and
00:40:50
I'd distract myself I'd have my phone in
00:40:52
front of me and be on social media or
00:40:55
doing whatever but so no getting a
00:40:57
costume bag as I said it was something I
00:40:59
didn't want but it has made things a lot
00:41:02
easier in that sense I you know this is
00:41:03
how I was able to get up early this
00:41:05
morning and go and do a radio interview
00:41:07
and then come here and it means I don't
00:41:09
have to go through those two hours every
00:41:11
morning okay yes I've got a bag hanging
00:41:13
out the side of my stomach that I poo
00:41:14
into but and you know it hasn't been the
00:41:16
smoothest process and pain and
00:41:19
discomfort that comes along with it but
00:41:21
I'm just trying to like let my body
00:41:24
figure things out hopefully you know
00:41:26
they do say it can take a couple of
00:41:27
months for for it to kind of settle into
00:41:29
a routine but yeah it's just it's just
00:41:32
changes and you know it's
00:41:34
the lesser of two evils I guess you know
00:41:36
it's kind of uh it's given me my
00:41:37
mornings back and
00:41:39
you know no longer have to get a finger
00:41:41
up the butt to help me poo every morning
00:41:43
and how long does it take to get used to
00:41:46
that like uh
00:41:48
you know you've been going through this
00:41:49
stuff for seven years now or whatever
00:41:51
like when when when does it become your
00:41:53
new sort of normal so you're just
00:41:54
playing on your phone and it doesn't
00:41:56
even become normal I mean it comes it
00:41:58
becomes normal but that doesn't mean I
00:42:00
like it doesn't mean I've completely
00:42:02
accepted it and everything but yeah it
00:42:04
doesn't actually take that long
00:42:06
um for things to kind of just become
00:42:08
normal obviously at the very beginning I
00:42:10
resisted all of that I didn't want any
00:42:11
of that happening I was like get your
00:42:13
finger away from me like
00:42:16
um and I you know you would have read
00:42:18
the funny part when I'm in the spinal
00:42:20
unit and the guy walks in to come in
00:42:30
wow some feeling
00:42:32
not not fulfilling yeah and that's
00:42:35
that's what I you know the one thing I
00:42:37
as like the feeling I have below my
00:42:39
injury I get to feel all the negative
00:42:40
stuff all the pain and everything
00:42:42
not a lot of the good stuff and that's
00:42:44
kind of just part of it it's this injury
00:42:46
I guess yeah so Susie who's who's Susie
00:42:49
she's a friend of your mums so you knew
00:42:51
her pre-accident yeah so mum used to go
00:42:53
to her pilates studio which is sooner
00:42:55
Pilates over on bearish Point Road on
00:42:57
the shore
00:42:58
and um and I started going along just
00:43:01
you know with my physical conditioning
00:43:02
with other injuries I'd had my knee and
00:43:05
my shoulder surgery and just getting
00:43:06
core strength up and um yeah I enjoyed
00:43:10
it and she used to like joke around
00:43:11
about like you know she'd let me come
00:43:13
for free and like go to the morning
00:43:14
classes and she'd joke about me being
00:43:17
you know hot Brad that would be there
00:43:18
for kind of eye candy for the young mums
00:43:20
that were coming after dropping the kids
00:43:22
off
00:43:23
um but no we we had a great relationship
00:43:25
in in terms of like she would just help
00:43:27
me through my injuries and and then yeah
00:43:30
she came along after the accident came
00:43:32
and saw me in the spinal unit and just
00:43:34
became this kind of real pillar of
00:43:35
support for me and
00:43:37
um just was a game changer in terms of
00:43:39
my recovery my mental recovery and a lot
00:43:42
of the um the issues I was facing and
00:43:44
come and sit with me once a week and we
00:43:47
just talk about what needed to be talked
00:43:49
about and so that chapter I think it's
00:43:51
called Mondays with Susie which is like
00:43:52
a play on the Tuesdays With Maury but
00:43:54
yeah which was one of my favorite books
00:43:56
yeah
00:43:57
so is she like a trained like
00:44:00
psychologist or psychotherapist or
00:44:01
anything or just a wise woman oh so
00:44:03
she's a kinesiologist which is more
00:44:05
around like the connection between the
00:44:08
body and the organs and the emotional
00:44:11
impact that the body can have on that
00:44:12
and
00:44:13
if I don't know barely anything about it
00:44:16
but um we were doing some Kinesiology
00:44:19
stuff but she's also been through her
00:44:21
own life challenges
00:44:23
um and things you know stuff that I put
00:44:24
in the book where she revealed to me
00:44:27
that she had like lost Twins and
00:44:28
childbirth there I mean that's got to be
00:44:30
one of the hardest things for for a
00:44:32
woman and mother to go through
00:44:34
so that was kind of what helped me open
00:44:36
up to her and okay she's been through
00:44:38
some [ __ ] but she's just very wise and
00:44:41
has an interesting view on on the world
00:44:44
that yeah just she was able to really
00:44:46
help me dig
00:44:48
past the the belief systems that surface
00:44:52
stuff that I'd learned and that I really
00:44:54
felt was true and and 100 like a part of
00:44:58
what life is but there's so many of
00:45:01
these things you can dig past that
00:45:03
surface belief and really get down to
00:45:06
the nitty-gritty of what it actually
00:45:08
means and what it is and and the reality
00:45:10
of things and so yeah she helped me with
00:45:12
that and we just I think that was the
00:45:14
most challenging part of actually
00:45:15
writing in the book was crafting those
00:45:18
learnings and those conversations
00:45:19
because there's a lot of dialogue there
00:45:21
and I had to just kind of take a lot of
00:45:23
that from memory and a couple of
00:45:25
recordings that I had from our sessions
00:45:27
and so yeah I enjoyed writing all that
00:45:30
stuff but it was really challenging to
00:45:32
to put it into words and come up with
00:45:34
you know the right analogies that we
00:45:36
used and you know talking about currency
00:45:38
and how we spend our currency on the
00:45:41
things in our life that um you know and
00:45:44
sometimes like with me my injury changed
00:45:47
the currency and I was trying to spend
00:45:49
the old currency on on the same things
00:45:52
that I used to where everything had
00:45:53
changed so yeah she was really good at
00:45:55
putting these analogies forward and
00:45:57
these different comparisons and ways to
00:46:00
to look at things and um and it just
00:46:02
really helped me grasp the concepts that
00:46:05
she was trying to put forward and it's
00:46:07
sort of that I wanted my book to be kind
00:46:09
of a stepping stone and and people
00:46:11
coming along the journey toward that
00:46:14
sort of Enlightenment if you want to
00:46:15
call it that
00:46:16
rather than some of these real gurui
00:46:19
self-help books that uh
00:46:21
quite a leap to get to like sort of your
00:46:24
Eckhart Tolle type books which are you
00:46:26
know the Power of Now They explore a lot
00:46:28
of the same Concepts but it can be a bit
00:46:30
of a leap mentally to get to that yeah
00:46:32
for sure
00:46:33
um yeah I hope people kind of enjoy that
00:46:35
journey and and pick up on the learnings
00:46:38
along the way yeah sort of find yourself
00:46:39
now because um there's a lot of talk in
00:46:41
the book about
00:46:42
um fomo the fear of missing out do you
00:46:44
find you still have those thoughts now
00:46:47
because that's human nature but when you
00:46:48
have those thoughts the lessons from
00:46:50
Susie you sort of they immediately sort
00:46:52
of exactly pull you back and that's with
00:46:55
everything every emotion it doesn't
00:46:56
there's nothing that I've been able to
00:46:59
do to completely wipe those emotions
00:47:01
from my life those feelings it's more
00:47:04
just having the tools and the
00:47:05
understanding to to know how to approach
00:47:08
them like fomo you know it's a fear of
00:47:10
missing out it's it's and again it's
00:47:12
it's basically putting myself mentally
00:47:14
into somewhere that I'm not somewhere
00:47:16
outside of now outside of the prison
00:47:19
because you know if you think of Here
00:47:21
and Now as the two realities
00:47:23
fear of missing out there could be
00:47:25
something that's happening now but it's
00:47:26
not here with me it's somewhere else so
00:47:28
I'm just projecting my thoughts into
00:47:30
what I think that moment is going to be
00:47:32
and what I'm missing out on but the
00:47:34
reality is if we're completely present
00:47:36
you can't miss out you know because if
00:47:38
you think that every moment we have in
00:47:41
life that we experience we have the
00:47:43
opportunity to learn something from
00:47:44
whether it's perceived as positive or
00:47:47
negative at the time we don't know what
00:47:49
it's going to lead to
00:47:50
um
00:47:51
you know the most negative thing that
00:47:53
happens to us could lead to the best
00:47:54
thing ever that may not have come if
00:47:57
that if that negative thing didn't
00:47:58
happen so you know as I said before our
00:48:01
minds like to wander outside of reality
00:48:03
a little bit and I think it's really
00:48:05
just about having those little reminders
00:48:08
there like I have this thing you know if
00:48:09
I ever feel jealous or if I feel firmer
00:48:11
or if I feel inadequate there's like a
00:48:14
little reminder like a little
00:48:15
notification that goes ping in my mind
00:48:17
and I'm like you know what this is like
00:48:19
you've done the you know the work you
00:48:22
know that if you're feeling jealous you
00:48:25
know that you can steer your intention
00:48:27
in your and your mentality toward how
00:48:29
you want to feel like a rather than
00:48:30
feeling jealous toward a friend for
00:48:32
something that they got that I didn't
00:48:35
it's about being stoked for that friend
00:48:37
for their success or whatever that might
00:48:40
be so yeah it's um
00:48:42
it's just about having those tools there
00:48:44
to to grab onto when we need them and
00:48:47
um and that's again what I hope people
00:48:49
will take from this book and you still
00:48:51
see her now
00:48:52
yep it's not every week
00:48:54
um could be maybe once once a month once
00:48:57
every two weeks it's more just if and
00:48:59
when I need it if I feel like I need a
00:49:00
chat if I feel like
00:49:02
you know and she's also um you know
00:49:04
she's she's learning and growing and
00:49:07
um taking her sort of Kinesiology
00:49:10
um studies further and she's learning
00:49:13
new things that she can do and apply to
00:49:15
my body and so she'll come around
00:49:17
sometimes go oh I've got this new thing
00:49:19
I want to try I'm like oh I'll be your
00:49:21
test dummy or whatever it is yeah um so
00:49:23
now we have a great relationship and
00:49:25
catch up quite often so yeah um there's
00:49:28
another thing in the same sort of
00:49:29
chapter a quote from your dad where he
00:49:30
goes nothing has any meaning but the
00:49:32
meaning we give it nothing has any
00:49:34
meaning but the meaning what does that
00:49:35
mean exactly oh I mean it's just more
00:49:37
like what we as Society or we as
00:49:41
individuals believe in life and the
00:49:44
importance we put on things is purely
00:49:46
just what we have decided and you know
00:49:51
and if you think of like
00:49:53
I mean anything really in life it's just
00:49:56
about
00:49:57
the the belief and the meaning that we
00:49:59
give things
00:50:00
and we we have the ability to adapt that
00:50:02
and change that in our minds yeah it's
00:50:04
it's interesting
00:50:06
um digging into that stuff and realizing
00:50:08
that yeah that we have the ability to
00:50:11
adjust our
00:50:13
beliefs and adjust the meaning we put on
00:50:15
on things the importance that we put on
00:50:18
certain things
00:50:20
if you had to pick one what are you more
00:50:21
proud of that that trick that ultimately
00:50:23
put you in the chair or this book
00:50:28
it would have to be the book yeah um
00:50:31
and I think it's more because of what I
00:50:33
had to go through to to finish it the
00:50:36
amount of work that went into it like
00:50:38
sure it was what 15 years of learning to
00:50:41
wakeboard and building up and and
00:50:43
learning new tricks and everything along
00:50:44
the way
00:50:46
um
00:50:46
but
00:50:48
the commitment that it took and the the
00:50:51
amount of work and the amount of effort
00:50:53
and the amount of
00:50:55
Challenge and struggle and just like I
00:50:57
didn't want to do it most days I was
00:51:00
like I I'm a procrastinator I'm not
00:51:02
great at like putting my time into into
00:51:05
that sort of thing so the fact that I
00:51:08
just I grinded my way through it all it
00:51:10
took me six years it just
00:51:12
it's something it's the the one thing
00:51:14
that I've put the most amount of work
00:51:16
into
00:51:17
besides wakeboarding but wakeboarding
00:51:19
was something that I enjoyed every
00:51:21
moment of it whereas this I didn't
00:51:24
um writing the book there were moments
00:51:25
of that I enjoyed oh yeah I like how
00:51:27
that part turned out and or it was good
00:51:30
to get that off my chest but the process
00:51:32
was
00:51:33
challenging and it was a struggle when
00:51:35
it put me in into you know
00:51:38
um to a bit of depression at times and
00:51:40
um
00:51:41
yeah so no definitely more proud of yeah
00:51:44
of the book and um please you said that
00:51:46
you you've crafted a masterpiece here
00:51:48
and it's um have you seen the movie
00:51:50
Shawshank Redemption I have it's almost
00:51:52
like these it kind of reminds me of Andy
00:51:54
Dufresne like you're burrowing his way
00:51:56
out of the jail with like a rock hammer
00:51:58
or whatever but the way that you've done
00:52:00
this it's just and I'm sure you've just
00:52:02
had people saying this over and over
00:52:04
again in media interviews the last
00:52:05
couple of weeks it's mind-blowing I love
00:52:07
that comparison The Rock Cameron
00:52:11
but another thing like
00:52:13
um I've I've done my books through the
00:52:16
same publisher and your contract's
00:52:17
probably the same as mine it's like you
00:52:19
need to do 70 to 90 000 words so for a
00:52:22
procrastinator to get to half a million
00:52:24
or whatever calm down that was more um
00:52:26
more of the evidence of the fact that
00:52:29
I'm not a writer I wasn't a writer I I
00:52:32
didn't know how to shape a book I didn't
00:52:33
know what was important to put in and
00:52:36
what wasn't
00:52:37
um so I just brain dumped my whole story
00:52:39
word vomit here you go and now you know
00:52:42
the whole story like what are we putting
00:52:45
out there like what what do we Whittle
00:52:46
it down to
00:52:47
um and yeah it was it was amazing you
00:52:50
know and I did have some some thoughts
00:52:52
you know around the amount of like sex
00:52:54
content in there and the women and
00:52:55
things like that I was like oh okay like
00:52:57
how a woman gonna receive this but my
00:53:00
entire editing publishing team was all
00:53:02
women so you know I kind of leaned on
00:53:05
them to know how much was was good to go
00:53:09
in and um so that yeah they were really
00:53:11
helpful with that including this at this
00:53:13
um yeah lady called Jenny who I imagine
00:53:15
um like clutching her pearls while
00:53:17
reading it especially a bit about the
00:53:19
force oh especially reading the
00:53:22
uncensored version oh God it's a stone
00:53:24
down oh it's all been it's like a red
00:53:27
discount somewhere oh totally yeah there
00:53:29
is but don't go searching you're not
00:53:31
gonna find it
00:53:33
um
00:53:33
but no it's yeah and that was kind of I
00:53:36
was a little bit concerned about that
00:53:37
but I was like okay well if these are
00:53:39
the people that are reading it and
00:53:40
proofreading it and everything and
00:53:42
helping me know what to put out there
00:53:43
then I think the the best ones to do
00:53:46
that so yeah yeah I feel like
00:53:47
hypothetical questions are sort of a
00:53:48
waste of time as you would learn from
00:53:50
Susie but should we do a couple of
00:53:51
hypotheticals sure why not How would how
00:53:53
would your life look now ahead had you
00:53:55
not had the excellent so how old are you
00:53:56
now 35. Brad would he still be going
00:53:59
around from house to house uh I
00:54:02
wakeboarding I feel like
00:54:05
I don't know there are a few things in
00:54:06
my career that I was like working toward
00:54:09
but whether they would have
00:54:11
um you know what path I would have taken
00:54:13
you know I was into commentary and
00:54:15
um getting into presenting and stuff
00:54:17
around events I was also getting into
00:54:19
the Hands-On of like setting up Cable
00:54:21
Systems and the stuff I was learning at
00:54:23
Lake roanoke's and getting involved with
00:54:25
the company that was that was doing that
00:54:27
and going around the US and building
00:54:28
cable parks that was something I thought
00:54:31
I might do and maybe even build a cable
00:54:33
Park here back in New Zealand
00:54:35
um also as well around like
00:54:37
Maybe
00:54:40
um with relationships I think even you
00:54:43
know before my injury I was at the point
00:54:44
where I was like okay I kind of want to
00:54:46
I want to be able to
00:54:48
have a proper relationship as opposed to
00:54:51
just living the single life and you know
00:54:53
I think that's something I would have I
00:54:55
would have found but you know you know
00:54:57
that I I might have been
00:54:58
might have ended up back here in New
00:55:00
Zealand broke no
00:55:02
no real like qualifications or anything
00:55:04
and could have ended up being a builder
00:55:07
or a tradie of some sort like I don't
00:55:09
know I don't know what I would have
00:55:10
fallen into but um
00:55:12
yeah it's interesting to think you know
00:55:15
would I still be in the U.S would I be
00:55:16
back here
00:55:18
it's hard to say really yeah yeah and if
00:55:20
someone said to you okay if God said to
00:55:22
you because God is real
00:55:25
you do about this in the book and I love
00:55:27
the the headline which got you in a
00:55:29
little bit of heat with some religious
00:55:30
you said if this is God's plan then
00:55:31
God's a dick yeah which I thought that's
00:55:33
a perfectly fair thing yeah exactly but
00:55:36
I had John Kuhn on the said John Cohen
00:55:37
on the podcast and he he said he uh he
00:55:40
managed to reframe it when someone
00:55:41
explained to him that you just replaced
00:55:43
the word god with love exactly that was
00:55:45
sort of my view as well or it's just
00:55:47
it's just adjusting it and knowing that
00:55:49
look that's I think if we look at being
00:55:53
completely honest about it all
00:55:55
the only thing that we can know for sure
00:55:57
is that we don't know what is in terms
00:55:59
of religion and God and creation and
00:56:02
things like that like
00:56:03
you know and so it's just about for me
00:56:05
it was like translating yeah as you say
00:56:07
the word god For Love or connection or
00:56:10
the universe or whatever it is that you
00:56:11
believe God to be
00:56:14
um so yeah that was kind of
00:56:16
there was a big Growing Experience
00:56:17
because for me I used to like resist
00:56:19
that and want to want to debate and kind
00:56:22
of like you know and so retaliate yeah
00:56:26
and it was more around like being able
00:56:28
to accept
00:56:29
the the meaning behind what people were
00:56:33
saying like going oh you know this is
00:56:34
all God's plan or
00:56:37
um whatever it might be and it's just
00:56:39
their beliefs and their way of
00:56:41
trying to connect and trying to
00:56:44
um
00:56:45
tell me that things are going to be okay
00:56:48
and I just had to learn that that's what
00:56:49
they were saying and that it's not like
00:56:51
oh yeah there's this guy in this guy who
00:56:53
planned for you to break your neck and
00:56:55
[ __ ] your life up it's still frustrating
00:56:57
to you it's frustrating to hear that I
00:56:58
guess
00:56:59
yeah say someone said to you okay Brad
00:57:03
you got two options I can we can we can
00:57:06
restore your mobility and give you five
00:57:08
more years of life we can have another
00:57:09
40 years of life as a quad
00:57:12
what would you pack
00:57:15
oh that's a tough one
00:57:17
um if you'd have told me that right
00:57:19
before my accident I mean [ __ ] give me
00:57:21
five years of Epic life of what I've
00:57:23
been living like you know all of my
00:57:25
fears at that time around all my beliefs
00:57:28
around
00:57:29
what it meant to be a quadriplegic it's
00:57:30
like do you want 40 Years of misery or
00:57:33
five years of epicness that's what I
00:57:35
would have thought at the time yeah
00:57:37
obviously I have a different view on it
00:57:38
now so
00:57:40
it's a tough one you know
00:57:42
it's a hypothetical so yeah yeah I don't
00:57:44
I don't know if I could give a proper
00:57:47
answer on that really because
00:57:48
it you know I see it both ways and I see
00:57:52
benefit and positives in both ways and I
00:57:55
think at the end of the day the 40 years
00:57:56
of being a wheelchair
00:57:59
I think has a more of a positive impact
00:58:02
on
00:58:03
the world and other people than five
00:58:05
years of me yeah charging it as a
00:58:08
wakeboarder yeah and that probably leads
00:58:10
us nicely to the sum this quote uh from
00:58:12
the book where you say I don't know how
00:58:14
I could ever be grateful for this life
00:58:15
yeah um which is funny because the
00:58:19
latest Woman's Day headline is I am
00:58:21
grateful for my injury which kind of a
00:58:24
misquote
00:58:26
I'll call that clickbait
00:58:28
um because I'm not women's magazines
00:58:30
doing clickbait I can't you know I
00:58:31
couldn't say I'm grateful for my injury
00:58:34
I've found gratitude for things that
00:58:36
mine you know that have happened in my
00:58:38
life since my injury and that this
00:58:41
change in in the direction of my life
00:58:43
has brought me so but it's a tough one
00:58:46
because you know like Susie tried to to
00:58:48
teach me that like
00:58:50
in order if you're grateful for
00:58:51
something now you kind of have to be
00:58:52
grateful for everything that led you to
00:58:54
this moment
00:58:55
um which is challenging because we have
00:58:57
all these ups and downs and things that
00:58:59
we wish we could have smoothed out and
00:59:00
maybe had not had happen in our lives
00:59:02
but we don't know what effect that would
00:59:04
have had and where it would have sent us
00:59:06
um so yeah it's just finding gratitude
00:59:09
um
00:59:10
for yeah for the things that that we
00:59:14
love about our lives and focusing on
00:59:16
what is good so there is gratitude there
00:59:18
but I I don't know if I could ever say
00:59:20
I'm grateful for the injury itself
00:59:24
um that's just a tough one to yeah to
00:59:26
get through absolutely oh for sure
00:59:29
um but mentally how are you today are
00:59:31
you good today yeah I mean I've still
00:59:33
been going through some physical
00:59:34
challenge which you know they are
00:59:36
challenging they are testing me and
00:59:39
um
00:59:40
but you know I'm I'm grateful for the
00:59:44
fact that I've got a book out this
00:59:45
project that I've been working on for
00:59:46
six years I'm grateful that I'm not
00:59:48
having to write it anymore
00:59:50
um each day and and it's funny you know
00:59:52
people are like yeah you know leading up
00:59:56
to the release like oh my God I can't
00:59:58
wait to read your book and at that point
00:59:59
I'd read it three times in the last four
01:00:01
months I'm like I can't wait to not read
01:00:03
my book
01:00:04
but no I'm just really grateful for the
01:00:06
response and for you know like the media
01:00:08
that have wanted to speak with me about
01:00:10
it and it's the opportunities that it's
01:00:12
coming is bringing to me and and the
01:00:15
responses that I'm getting the the
01:00:17
messages and people saying oh my God I
01:00:19
can't put this book down I was up till
01:00:21
3am I had to force myself to to put it
01:00:23
down and go to sleep and um so yeah to
01:00:26
having that sort of feedback and it's
01:00:28
good and it's got me and you know like
01:00:30
that that feeling of purpose I think
01:00:32
that's what we all need to be in a good
01:00:34
place is to to feel like there's some
01:00:36
sort of purpose yeah um and whatever
01:00:38
that may be and I think
01:00:41
I think keeping that in in moderation or
01:00:44
just knowing that like it doesn't have
01:00:46
to be this massive Grand purpose that is
01:00:49
going to change the entire world like we
01:00:50
can make it as small as possible but
01:00:52
having that something that we're working
01:00:54
toward Something That We're
01:00:57
focused on and and passionate about this
01:01:01
this book and you know the media around
01:01:03
it and getting it out there that's what
01:01:04
that is for me and then on to the next
01:01:06
Journey yeah I made it some something to
01:01:08
be to be proud of and um yeah I hope
01:01:10
you're feeling sort of euphoric at the
01:01:11
moment
01:01:12
um because you deserve to be yeah I mean
01:01:14
definitely um you know my body and the
01:01:18
the pain and the discomfort is trying to
01:01:20
like pull that away from me but but at
01:01:22
the end of the day you know we can steer
01:01:24
Our intention and and our um our focus
01:01:27
and for me I just like to pull that back
01:01:30
to what I'm grateful for and and the
01:01:32
good stuff that's going on in life at
01:01:33
the moment yeah oh one last one just
01:01:35
before I wrap up so yeah the book
01:01:37
launched last weekend uh which was a
01:01:39
fantastic party there was a clip you
01:01:41
played at the end like a couple of
01:01:42
minutes of a like a documentary and I
01:01:44
noticed um like you started you started
01:01:45
crying at that time are they tears of
01:01:48
sadness tears of Pride watching the
01:01:50
docker yeah I think your eyes were
01:01:52
playing tricks on you yeah I don't think
01:01:53
I was great
01:01:54
[Music]
01:01:55
um
01:01:56
now because I've seen that so many times
01:01:57
and everything
01:01:58
um included the footage of um the
01:02:01
uncensored footage of you um having the
01:02:03
accident yeah and again I've seen that
01:02:05
plenty of times it doesn't affect me
01:02:06
anymore
01:02:08
um you know the the one part that I
01:02:10
don't know there might have been a
01:02:11
little bit of welling up in my eyes and
01:02:12
it's just when there's the voicemail
01:02:13
that was left on my mum's phone about
01:02:16
the accident when that plays that always
01:02:18
gets me
01:02:20
um and but yeah so that's kind of the
01:02:23
next part of the journey we've got a
01:02:25
documentary project we're working on
01:02:28
um with the amazing team at motion
01:02:29
sickness
01:02:31
um which I think I've just been ranked
01:02:33
like fifth in the world of like creative
01:02:35
Agency for this year it's like they do
01:02:37
amazing stuff um you know we're most of
01:02:40
the way there with the funding we're
01:02:42
just kind of trying to pull in the last
01:02:43
like 30 of the funding and
01:02:46
um hopefully yeah my body plays plays
01:02:49
ball for summer and we can
01:02:51
finish the rest of the filming and and
01:02:53
um hopefully have another project out
01:02:55
there this time next year another thing
01:02:58
for me to be proud of another thing for
01:03:00
me to come chat to you about yeah is
01:03:02
that what you need in life like things
01:03:03
to look forward to do you think I think
01:03:05
so I think we all need something to to
01:03:07
look forward to something to work on and
01:03:09
you know otherwise we're just kind of
01:03:10
lingering and just floating through life
01:03:12
and it's you know it's good to have a
01:03:14
focus and a
01:03:16
and for me it's you know I like to do
01:03:18
big these big projects that I think will
01:03:21
um have a positive impact on on people
01:03:23
and the way they approach life and yeah
01:03:26
there's a quote that I like to use
01:03:29
um which is more around just kind of
01:03:31
living for the moment and doing what we
01:03:33
can for now and it's um never forget
01:03:35
yesterday but always live for today
01:03:38
because you never know what tomorrow can
01:03:40
bring or what it could take away yeah I
01:03:42
like that yeah I like that let's play a
01:03:44
good place to end it well but if there's
01:03:46
any single girls listening and they want
01:03:48
to slide into your DMs what are you what
01:03:50
are you looking for what's the what's
01:03:52
the dream
01:03:53
yeah just people who are who are open to
01:03:56
to learning about
01:03:57
different ways of of doing things and
01:03:59
the fact that you know my life is a bit
01:04:01
different but it doesn't mean that it's
01:04:04
all miserable or anything like you know
01:04:06
there's just there's some great stuff
01:04:07
going on as well so
01:04:09
um you still get the top five inches
01:04:10
which is the most important part eh
01:04:13
totally 100
01:04:16
um you know I think it's uh it's about
01:04:18
connection and it's just about you know
01:04:19
like chatting with people and getting to
01:04:21
know them and thing you know what what
01:04:24
sort of ideas and mentalities and ways
01:04:28
of life can I connect and and work
01:04:30
together
01:04:31
just keeping myself myself open and uh
01:04:35
yeah welcoming of anyone who's who's
01:04:38
interested and wants to chat and
01:04:40
yeah yeah well you I think you're a
01:04:42
great catch for um the right person a
01:04:44
nurturing person I think yeah yeah I
01:04:46
think that's it
01:04:47
cheers hey
01:04:51
um congrats man this book is uh it's
01:04:53
awesome it's something to be proud of
01:04:54
and uh I can see you sort of bursting
01:04:56
but even they got nerve issues at the
01:04:58
moment I can see you still bursting with
01:04:59
pride and and you should be as well yes
01:05:02
thanks for having me thanks very much
01:05:04
for making it all the way to the end
01:05:05
there was Brad's Mailer on Runners only
01:05:07
with dom Harvey if you like what you
01:05:09
hear maybe give it a five star rating on
01:05:12
your podcast platform or even leave a
01:05:13
review if you've got any feedback
01:05:15
suggestions criticism positive feedback
01:05:18
whatever you can email me anytime you
01:05:20
want Don harveynz gmail.com or Dom
01:05:23
Harvey NZ on Instagram thank you very
01:05:26
much for the support thanks for
01:05:27
listening love you guys I'll see you
01:05:29
next week
