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[Music]
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[Music]
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[Music]
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and I'm currently in um South Auckland
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in the what is it despite the spinal
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unit Spinal Rehab unit yeah and spinal
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Rehabilitation Unit thank you thank you
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with um a couple of Legends of the
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running community in New Zealand uh
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Ellie pottinger and Kerry Souther good
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morning hey dog hi
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so so good to be sitting here with you
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guys um you know the last couple of
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years I think have been a dumpster fire
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for most people in New Zealand but it's
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fair to say it's hard to imagine how
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2022 could be more of a [ __ ] up of a
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year for anyone than what it's been for
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you guys and it's also hard to imagine
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that anyone else could be as positive
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and resilient and smile through the [ __ ]
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I've been through this year
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you guys are simply inspirational both
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of you thanks Tom
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um yeah it's sort of a you know give and
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take year for us isn't it obviously the
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the news of the accident you know
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managed to fall off my bike and uh break
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my neck a couple of months ago and um
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it's pretty permanent it's pretty bad
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so I spend a life in a chair which is
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you know pretty tough but
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um some good news today
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yeah so
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um when Kerry had his accident I was
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seven and a half weeks pregnant after
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six years of trying
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um so yeah it's been a bit of a roller
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coaster year for us so far and I guess
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it'll continue that way congratulations
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you're pregnant yeah I loved on Space
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right now
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so I found out just before the accident
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and I topped it off by uh
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I thought we went to Great Lengths to
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get out of changing
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okay so um
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so so the accident was on um 26th of Feb
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yeah 26 feet now I'm um I'm a fan of
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yours I follow you on Strava give an
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indication of the sort of guy you are so
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a week before the accident on Strava you
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can see you you've had like a 17 hour
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run 60 kilometers uh up up and down a
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few mountains I rode
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what this enjoy doing was just getting
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out there and having
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his mates and going places and um one of
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the weirdly the last thing on my bucket
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list that I wanted do was that I wanted
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to go and take off the three volcanoes
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and talking International Park in one
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push so I just went down there on a
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Friday with a mate and um ran up with
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opihu and then down to the Chateau and
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across to tongariro and up now at ahoi
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and then back to where we started at
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Kino and closed out the loop in 17 hours
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this sort of stuff you just you know me
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and my mates were doing it a sort of a
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Summer's missions that's such a cool
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thing to do yeah yeah fun
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yeah a long long day uh yeah I've had
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some long days I've done some 30-hour
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missions before and um so this is the
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thing for me with um spinal injuries
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like the one you've got I think it'd be
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a massive adjustment and it'd be a hard
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thing to cope with and deal with for
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anybody but when you're someone like
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yourself or a brad smailer who's a
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wakeboarder that I had on the podcast a
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couple of months ago I reckon it's it's
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got to be even even tougher and the
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respect that here you are you're you're
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pushing your body to the Limit you're
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using it as it's um supposed to be used
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you've really bookended physiology
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haven't I have gone from a point where
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um uh you know incredible Fitness you
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know like resting heart rate of 37 and
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you know and you just go for a weekend
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run for 17 hours if that's what you want
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to do and now I'm at a point where I've
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got no legs and you know I can't I can
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barely move my arms and you know I've
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lost it's not going to get any better
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I've got no movement or since you know
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below sort of my armpits so um you know
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it's like you couldn't it couldn't
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possibly be a different a further a more
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different life for me but um you know
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I've got to get used to carrying that
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attitude forward you know like the the
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same the same things that uh that drove
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me to be you know like a good athlete or
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you know a great coach was you know
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there's still exist inside me I fell on
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my head but none of my brains fell out
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you know it's still the same person so
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um I've got to have the same motivation
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the same outlook on life if I was in
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your position I I think I'd be in a
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state of denial for your weeks months
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even years would not be a great place to
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be or a healthy place to be but you you
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sort of seem to accept it straight away
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and accepted with quite good humor
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um the key things are acceptance and
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gratitude I think you've got to accept
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where where you are and you know it
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doesn't matter who you are you know you
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really
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you know you once you once you realize
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that um
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perhaps there's a way out of there and
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that you can you can be you can still be
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the main person that you you were before
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you know what defined me I think was uh
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you know not
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uh not my legs or um you know people
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don't love you for your legs they love
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you for who you are um
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and so uh so it's still that person and
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I realized very early on that I could
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still be a running coach and I can still
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help people and I just love helping
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people and that's what we've been able
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to do that's my way out of there that
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was a light at the end of the tunnel
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even when in the darkest moments I
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remember even then I hadn't
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a conversation with an ICU doctor about
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whether I was a candidate for assisted
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suicide you know you know you swing both
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ways with it um oh it's very very hard
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to at that point I was a hit on a pillow
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you know you can't move you can't move
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anything even now I can't you know
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you know do anything
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you know you wonder whether it's worth
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going on but you know
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the same time you've got so much to live
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for you know
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I've got two girls and you know maybe
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one more on the way
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yeah but I think that's
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a tricky thing is
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going to see the way forward like you're
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just in that moment and so that's what
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you think it is but uh there was a
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really good Turning Point probably
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three weeks ago when we met um Gareth
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Lynch who's a real black paralympian
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and we went over to the gym they train
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in the gym just over there and uh
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get curiously to guess you know like
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do hard days because gas is now five
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years down the track from his injury and
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gas was just he's just like beaming he's
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just this radiant kind of enthusiastic
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guy and he's like
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oh yeah and seeing people
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engaging with their Community
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laughing having fun you know being
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active was really key for Kerry mentally
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kind of okay there's still stuff to have
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to aim towards yeah
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yeah where does where does this come
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from this like Relentless positivity
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I mean it's such a good attitude yeah my
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dad killed himself when I was very young
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and uh I think that sort of shapes who
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you are a lot I think
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sorry
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um yeah you just sort of realize that uh
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you've got to start with loving yourself
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first and once you're comfortable with
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who you are
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um then you can you follow the capacity
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yeah
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yeah just highly motivated to uh to get
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the best best that I can out of my life
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and um yeah help others as well yeah
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we're all getting a little bit of motion
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far out I didn't think we're gonna do
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this 10 minutes
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oh you guys um you guys are a hell of a
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couple I'm guessing when one of you is
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having a bad day or a negative moment uh
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the other one would step up to the plate
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and say come on
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shake it off is that how it works with
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you too yeah there's not a lot of bad
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days actually when we're together
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um uh and one of the event directors
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calls I saw the sapphire couple or
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something yeah we're just like always
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beaming and always great you know I
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think we just we bounce off each other
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really well and uh it's a really good
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team I think a good partner is an
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enabler and I've been thinking about it
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more lately and it's been It's Tricky
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right because curious become disabled
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and so how I can enable him in this
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situation but also it's really important
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still to have fun and laugh and love and
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so it's trying to bring that balance
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always to our relationship
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yeah it always says from pretty good I
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think I just
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uh this is in the time we've been
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together seven years I think um we've
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just really grown together really well
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and um you know like a squadron was born
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out of that now running business
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um and it's obviously grown as well
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along the way but um I think people are
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drawn to that positivity as well and um
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you know we're really quite committed to
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what we do and uh I've lost a little bit
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of the outlet you know like when you're
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having a bit of a rough day Dom you you
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can go for a run and you can sort of
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Shake It Out yeah you know it's a fix
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for problems you know or often doesn't
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fix a problem but you feel better about
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it yeah you don't just the endorphins
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and things yeah yeah so I've lost that
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because what's happening now is you're
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getting on the Upper Limb cycle and
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doing what I can hand signs yeah so what
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happened with the arms because um you I
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I arrived here just before we started
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recording and um you know I met you in
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your chair and you gave me a fist pump
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and I was really surprised it was a that
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was it was a great sign so so when you
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after the accident you got taken into
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hospital and you had nothing from the
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neck down yeah yeah no arms or anything
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no
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my C5 so they've used C5 and C6 together
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and my spines have you counting down a
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vertebrae from from really the skull
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itself I'm down I'm down at sort of C5
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which is my injury
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um and so that means my spinal cord
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Works down to C4 and C4 gives you
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shoulders and it gives me biceps but
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really nothing else so I can move my
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arms with my biceps only but the
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unfortunate things I have no triceps so
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my hands just collapse I can't really
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raise my arms above my head or anything
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so I can sort of flap my arms around
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like Kermit
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um and uh and you remember you know
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have you ever watched them singing about
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rainbows you'd think uh he's not really
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playing that guitar is he
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um yeah yeah
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um so yeah sort of a lot like Kumon I
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think in that regard but uh good to have
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that mobility and again when I say one
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of the things that acceptance and
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gratitude I'm grateful for what I have
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because if I had broken my spine just
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one vertebrae up I wouldn't even have my
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arms so um I'm very lucky to have that
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so uh
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it will let me do some hand cycling and
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uh and various other sports which would
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be good so I'm looking forward to that
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many years to come yeah is it going to
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improve uh no I measure B which is quite
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a bad
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bad damage to the spinal column
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of the connectivity beyond the point of
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injury so you have sensation below your
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point of injury but no motor
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right right so I can feel a lot of
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things
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um eggplant Emoji a lot of stuff
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oh yeah have you got some uh don't worry
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about it you've brought it up I can't I
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can't move things below the point of
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injury right I've got lots of things I
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have sensitivity in so right so every
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day when I'm doing my bowel cures
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um yeah I'm 100 uh sensitive to uh to
00:11:25
those fingers that are in my bum but uh
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right I don't have any ability to uh to
00:11:29
squeeze those fingers unfortunately
00:11:30
right but okay what's well because
00:11:33
obviously the damage is so bad to my
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body
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um they have to you know put
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suppositories in me each morning and oh
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because you've got no cause so you can't
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you can't activate your trunk or nothing
00:11:43
and it's not just the muscles it's the
00:11:44
nervous system as well so um you know
00:11:47
the the the the body is is it's in a
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real State there because it can't I
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can't tell that anything is wrong you
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know like a I don't even know if I'm
00:11:55
hungry or full or anything did you want
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to talk about the accident and the dad
00:11:58
happened or not I just went out for a
00:12:00
bike ride one morning and uh whenever
00:12:01
the handlebars Dom have you been over
00:12:02
the handlebars of your bike I I I
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um I I live with so much fear
00:12:08
um I sort of assess risk so I would
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never attempt
00:12:19
with my friends and I wouldn't I
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wouldn't go you know and do all these
00:12:23
down the steps and so what was it can
00:12:25
you explain the run or uh amount of bike
00:12:28
ride I just went for an ordinary bike
00:12:29
ride and uh when I've uh I was I was
00:12:31
riding an illegal Trail and if I could
00:12:33
even do a forest um you like everything
00:12:35
in my life I'd uh uh you know try and
00:12:37
level up but always sort of pushing my
00:12:39
ability a little bit
00:12:41
um and uh so I sort of progressing
00:12:43
through mountain bike in the last five
00:12:44
years and you know trying harder things
00:12:46
and biking a little bit harder and um I
00:12:48
wonder if a feature that was probably
00:12:49
about a minute and a half to two meters
00:12:50
high and I just didn't get enough run
00:12:52
those up and uh you know landed you know
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hard on the front shock and just went
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over the handlebars and landed on my
00:12:58
head and not a scratch on my helmet not
00:13:00
a scratch on the bike my neck took it
00:13:02
all and
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uh yeah just broke a vertebrae lying
00:13:05
there looking up at the trees with mates
00:13:07
holding my hands and making the right
00:13:08
phone calls um and uh yeah alligator
00:13:11
just
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um what was you were gone for a swim uh
00:13:15
going for a run around techie tapu and
00:13:18
um right weirdly right when Kerry had
00:13:20
his accident I kind of like the morning
00:13:22
sun was filtering through the trees and
00:13:24
I just stopped and I was like
00:13:26
oh they're beautiful and I was feeling
00:13:27
so content with my life and then got
00:13:30
back and got ready to get changed for an
00:13:34
Open Water Swim so I had my
00:13:37
um he carries away suit half up my waist
00:13:39
and then I got this phone call and I've
00:13:41
been actually not wanting him to ride
00:13:43
that trail yeah I think I read this in
00:13:45
an article and stuff or somewhere you
00:13:47
had you said the day before you were
00:13:48
going to do it and you just had a bad
00:13:50
feeling about it oh he'd record it he'd
00:13:53
kind of gone and walked through the
00:13:55
trail and had a look at it and I've run
00:13:59
it before as well and I was just
00:14:00
thinking I just don't know about this
00:14:03
um and so the week beforehand Kira's
00:14:06
meant to fly out actually and do 10 days
00:14:07
of running on the new Ultra Trail course
00:14:10
in Kosciusko in Australia and I just
00:14:12
said to him you know you've got a lot of
00:14:14
running coming up ahead this week just
00:14:16
like just walk anything that you don't
00:14:18
feel confident with
00:14:20
um yeah I just didn't want him to ride
00:14:22
it and
00:14:24
um so so then I got back ready for my
00:14:26
swim got this phone call and it was
00:14:28
Ellie Ally I've had an accident and I
00:14:31
was going you're joking you're joking I
00:14:33
thought he was winding me up because I'd
00:14:35
been kind of Anna's case a little bit
00:14:37
about it but also it's so funny isn't it
00:14:40
do you think that's like a like a wife's
00:14:42
intuition thing or I think there was
00:14:45
something had intuition as well like
00:14:48
you could kind of sit on I didn't really
00:14:49
sleep the night before and I was kind of
00:14:51
thinking about it
00:14:54
about that particular jump yeah and then
00:14:56
I thought it was just focus but if
00:14:58
someone said to you this okay you can do
00:15:00
this jump there's a one percent chance
00:15:01
that this accident's gonna happen would
00:15:04
you have attempted it still went on
00:15:06
because you know we spend a lot of time
00:15:07
and
00:15:08
you go over the accident a million times
00:15:10
and it's about all of those sliding door
00:15:12
moments yeah and um you know you know
00:15:15
would you have done it or would you do
00:15:16
it differently or you know would you put
00:15:18
it off for a different bike or a
00:15:19
different setup or or any of those sorts
00:15:21
of things and um at least a bigger
00:15:23
picture of you know should we take risks
00:15:26
at all and yeah how do I feel about it
00:15:28
now I've got kids do I want them you
00:15:30
know we have trampoline accidents in
00:15:31
here leap Park accidents we've got you
00:15:33
know people kiwi's just doing what kiwis
00:15:36
do
00:15:41
[Laughter]
00:15:44
you know I don't want to wrap the world
00:15:46
up in Cotton wool and I wouldn't live
00:15:47
any differently I arrived at where I am
00:15:49
at 44 because took risks and I did stuff
00:15:51
you know a week before I was on who
00:15:54
jumping over icy crevasses you know like
00:15:56
climbing down you know Cliff faces with
00:15:59
scrambling rock my life has replaced
00:16:01
with incredibly dangerous probably
00:16:03
stupid things but but that's experience
00:16:06
you know that's what that's what life is
00:16:08
for and I'm sorry if you're too shy to
00:16:10
uh to get the skateboard out
00:16:13
tell them I think you're missing out on
00:16:15
some stuff here man I would take you for
00:16:18
a run if I still could I promise we'll
00:16:20
go someplace yeah yeah yeah
00:16:22
oh man that's such a good attitude such
00:16:25
a good one yeah I've always said I
00:16:34
I feel had I just lost my legs it
00:16:36
wouldn't be an issue but take my
00:16:39
hands I can't use a keyboard or a mouse
00:16:42
I can't even flip someone off it's so
00:16:44
frustrating you can't I can't do
00:16:46
anything I can't move my hands I have to
00:16:47
help them pick his nose because because
00:16:49
we're we're sitting here just to set the
00:16:52
scene like you're sort of um
00:16:53
gesticulating you're like you're using
00:16:55
your hands but you can't but you can't
00:16:57
pick your nose no I thought I saw you in
00:16:59
your face before scratching I believe I
00:17:01
have a fully functioning penis but I
00:17:03
can't use it
00:17:04
it's frustrating we have discussions in
00:17:07
here would you rather you know yeah
00:17:11
some guys have hit their hands and don't
00:17:14
have any function and in that area right
00:17:16
what would you do and then
00:17:18
curious It's got sensation in his name
00:17:20
this podcast is going somewhere not
00:17:23
functioning right you can't use his
00:17:25
fingers honestly so you can still get an
00:17:27
erection yes yeah
00:17:29
right so okay so you can so sorry for
00:17:32
fixating on this
00:17:33
so so you can get an erection but you've
00:17:36
got you've got no feeling in it so you
00:17:37
know I have full feelings it's great
00:17:39
yeah it's no worries but I just can't I
00:17:41
haven't got the hands for it well so you
00:17:42
just can't no manual over right all
00:17:44
right
00:17:45
got it no yeah got it yeah I can just
00:17:48
look at it
00:17:51
sorry are people running to this I don't
00:17:53
know maybe maybe I don't know it's an
00:17:55
inspirational okay so um yes
00:17:58
so very personal information Dom well as
00:18:01
we you brought it up oh
00:18:04
but I think it's actually good
00:18:09
whatever this is and um yeah I think
00:18:12
it's important because we had no idea
00:18:15
about spinal cord injuries what to
00:18:18
expect no one no one does no kiwi should
00:18:21
because they tune them out between
00:18:23
Christchurch and here there's usually
00:18:25
one mountain bike accident at all times
00:18:27
here there's usually you know three or
00:18:30
four motorbike accidents and here
00:18:31
there's car accidents there's all sorts
00:18:34
of tragic stories of just kiwis going
00:18:35
about their daily lives yeah and then
00:18:37
the summer lots of swimming accidents
00:18:39
like just diving into the water at the
00:18:41
beach
00:18:44
oh swimming pools you know watering
00:18:48
holes waterfalls you name it kiwis like
00:18:50
water so
00:18:52
um where we are now this has been your
00:18:53
home for the since the accident happened
00:18:55
pretty much yeah you get to go home
00:18:57
um in another few weeks um what's that
00:19:00
going to look like like to have a keg of
00:19:01
it I have 24 hours here so um that's the
00:19:05
level of my injury is a team of five
00:19:07
will have around the clock here for me
00:19:11
to the end of my days
00:19:12
yeah just catching up with everyone's
00:19:13
really important but you know I really
00:19:14
want to get back to my job you know like
00:19:16
I can yeah I can't use cable to Mouse
00:19:18
but I can still use a laptop with um
00:19:20
voice activation software so
00:19:27
so there's athletes that need support
00:19:29
for various races you know the Sun keeps
00:19:31
rising and events are hosted so um
00:19:39
they're possum
00:19:41
um in mid-june so Kerry we've always
00:19:45
emceed at different events and yeah
00:19:47
we're looking forward to getting back to
00:19:49
that as well and so sharing that story
00:19:51
is also part of that being able to
00:19:53
integrate back into the communities that
00:19:55
we love being part of with yeah and the
00:19:59
community loves you guys as well
00:20:02
what's that we've met a few athletes on
00:20:04
Finish Lines and start lines yeah yeah
00:20:06
yeah and um but I think people love you
00:20:08
like
00:20:10
maybe some love you for your like
00:20:12
athletic prowess but I think most of
00:20:14
it's your personality and your charm
00:20:15
which uh hasn't changed no I so I meet
00:20:19
you I think for the first time at uh
00:20:20
younger Marathon right
00:20:22
um and you just uh went for it literally
00:20:24
what 21k just a half yeah just a half
00:20:26
just a little [ __ ] half yeah you know
00:20:28
that's a beautiful distance I love the
00:20:30
way that distance rolls out I think the
00:20:33
first kilometer you're like oh this pace
00:20:34
is hurting me second kilometer you know
00:20:36
still not sure but by the fifth
00:20:38
kilometer you know you settle into it
00:20:39
yeah I love the assistance because by
00:20:40
the 10th kilometer you're like I'm
00:20:42
halfway through this I might be able to
00:20:43
do this and then you get to about 16 and
00:20:45
17 and you're like oh and then you get
00:20:47
to like 19 and 20 and you pretty much
00:20:49
just close your eyes grip your teeth and
00:20:51
hang on to the end I just love the way
00:20:53
that the story of 21k rolls out it's
00:20:55
such a good distance to race so if I
00:20:57
could race one distance over and over
00:20:58
again it'll be 21ks
00:21:02
no no no one no one has never like
00:21:04
described a half marathon to me quite
00:21:05
like that intimately I love
00:21:08
I love that yeah it's a great distance
00:21:09
we've gone to the days of me holding
00:21:10
three
00:21:11
and freaking 330k pace
00:21:14
yeah I used to go not that it matters
00:21:16
now it's very relevant but uh I used to
00:21:19
love the feeling of
00:21:22
everyone on tarmac and you can you and
00:21:24
you go you're flying along you're
00:21:26
feeling good you know anything on the
00:21:28
force is just um
00:21:30
I know I'll miss that but uh you know as
00:21:34
a guy in his 40s I was getting ready to
00:21:36
yeah yeah
00:21:39
um okay I I feel like that's enough
00:21:42
that's enough about the injury and where
00:21:43
things are at
00:21:44
um we've got so much other stuff to talk
00:21:46
about first of all I want to know how
00:21:47
you guys met
00:21:48
how did you guys meet each other you see
00:21:49
seven years you've been together
00:21:51
I mean you're such an amazing Captain so
00:21:54
I can't imagine going back eight years
00:21:56
and seeing you two yeah it's hard to
00:21:58
imagine YouTube without each other so
00:21:59
there's a there's a really neat event
00:22:01
that they're doing national park or the
00:22:02
t-42s and it's a total sport event and
00:22:05
Aaron and his team really cool really
00:22:06
welcoming um they throw a massive party
00:22:09
at the park lodge in natural park and so
00:22:11
I was there that Saturday night and um
00:22:13
uh and I just bumped into this this girl
00:22:16
on the uh on the dance floor and she
00:22:18
said hey where are you going and um
00:22:19
anyway uh one thing led to another and
00:22:22
we got chatting and um she said uh you
00:22:25
know what's your name and I said I think
00:22:27
you should know I'm quite a big deal and
00:22:28
uh just tongue-in-cheek right look at
00:22:31
the top of the results I said that on
00:22:33
the on the wall over there are all the
00:22:35
results I think you'll find my names
00:22:37
right at the top of the list and um so
00:22:40
she loved that and she started chipping
00:22:41
away at me so the first thing she did
00:22:43
was um look at someone on a high horse
00:22:45
and think about uh how she could bring
00:22:47
them down to ground and after about 10
00:22:49
minutes of her making fun of me I
00:22:50
realized how much wood she had an
00:22:53
intellect that goes with it and uh I
00:22:55
needed to reverse the conversation and
00:22:56
start an introduction and get to know
00:22:58
her better so is that a fair description
00:23:00
of how we met yeah pretty much we yeah
00:23:03
we kind of ended up I it was just like
00:23:05
this yeah really great connection and we
00:23:08
sat down and talked for a couple of
00:23:09
hours I think and then
00:23:12
um it just kind of just bonded over over
00:23:14
both being sarcastic yeah yeah pretty
00:23:17
much exactly that yeah I also love for
00:23:20
an outdoors yeah
00:23:25
tramping
00:23:28
tramping and you know
00:23:30
um how much we just loved you know
00:23:32
staying in huts and being in the hills
00:23:34
and the mountains or was it love it love
00:23:36
at first sight do you think yeah yeah I
00:23:39
think so yeah because we're like we I
00:23:42
couldn't stop we could like we was
00:23:44
chatting for hours that night and um I
00:23:46
don't think it's pretty rare you don't
00:23:47
just sort of meet someone and then feel
00:23:49
like you really need to chat to them for
00:23:50
hours
00:23:51
um but yeah it was uh it was really just
00:23:54
off the off the back of her making fun
00:23:55
of me for a while that that I really
00:23:57
enjoyed her uh and then nothing's
00:23:59
changed actually has it you just no you
00:24:01
still do that don't you yeah yeah well
00:24:03
you make fun of me as well as much as I
00:24:05
can maybe
00:24:07
yeah it is it is a love language I think
00:24:10
yeah not an official one but no the
00:24:12
eighth one love language yeah
00:24:15
so here is the one that had the accident
00:24:17
and he's in the chair but it's um it's
00:24:19
got to be bloody tough for you as well
00:24:23
I mean I hate to use the word victim in
00:24:26
front of you guys because I don't think
00:24:27
either of you would ever have like a
00:24:29
victim mentality oh no let's be clear I
00:24:31
have two life too yeah
00:24:34
yeah so how are you doing and how have
00:24:37
you been um it's been
00:24:45
I can't feel anything and
00:24:48
um I just went straight around to where
00:24:50
the ambulance was going to meet him at
00:24:52
the forest and then Rhys called and
00:24:54
Reece was like he he actually lost it
00:24:57
crying hysterically just like you're
00:24:59
gonna who's Reese uh one of our really
00:25:00
good friends yeah is it current uh men's
00:25:03
champion of the terror ultra marathon
00:25:05
yeah
00:25:07
like a little love triangle yeah
00:25:10
um yeah and so Rhys was with Kerry for
00:25:12
the accident he actually is also the
00:25:14
Builder that renovated our house the
00:25:16
last year and a half so and he also did
00:25:18
the um Three Peaks run with Curie so all
00:25:21
the weekend before yeah oh amazing yeah
00:25:23
really good friends
00:25:25
um yeah and he was just hysterically
00:25:27
crying saying you're gonna probably go
00:25:29
in there um
00:25:31
the rescue helicopter at Auckland with
00:25:34
Kerry and so I was just kind of like
00:25:36
crazy like of what have I got on me that
00:25:39
I can go
00:25:41
um yeah and oversized winter you're
00:25:44
weird yeah and
00:25:47
um yeah meet him in the ambulance and
00:25:49
that was pretty shocking like to see
00:25:52
they they have an outline of a human and
00:25:55
they just had a line from like straight
00:25:57
across his shoulders sort of thing like
00:25:59
which I guess obviously indicates that
00:26:01
he was paralyzed from there down and and
00:26:04
seeing his color and his temperature and
00:26:09
kind of disorientation and that was
00:26:11
quite
00:26:12
um confronting and then you just end up
00:26:15
in Auckland going like it's like being
00:26:17
picked up by a tornado and then like
00:26:20
things that are whirling all around you
00:26:21
and you're just going how the hell have
00:26:22
I got here like what is happening I'm
00:26:25
trying to make sense of it all and
00:26:27
that's Yeah so basically moved to
00:26:31
Auckland
00:26:32
um friends brought up our vehicle and
00:26:34
clothes for me and all that sort of
00:26:36
stuff
00:26:37
and um and then just been yeah with care
00:26:41
every day since just you know trying to
00:26:44
meet his needs and
00:26:47
be there and support him and also run
00:26:49
our businesses and yeah and she's a
00:26:52
superwoman yeah grow a tiny human yeah
00:26:55
you're right yeah you're having some
00:26:57
down time you're taking care of yourself
00:26:59
not really I I just try and like you
00:27:02
know like everyone says look after yeah
00:27:05
but but there isn't that space like I
00:27:08
mean that you have to try and you just
00:27:11
try and do what you can do to look after
00:27:13
yourself so it's basically trying to eat
00:27:17
decent food drink get whatever sleep you
00:27:20
can and and just you know Maslow's
00:27:23
hierarchy of needs right like shelter
00:27:25
food all that sort of stuff
00:27:28
um so I figure
00:27:30
yeah they'll be more more Recreation
00:27:33
time
00:27:34
future but not right now yeah yeah geez
00:27:37
you got a good one didn't you yeah I'm
00:27:39
very lucky but um hands off Tom
00:27:43
so so after the accident I give a little
00:27:45
page was set up and um I think this is
00:27:48
remarkable it sees a lot about you guys
00:27:50
as people last time I checked it was
00:27:52
something like 120 527 000 which is a
00:27:54
lot of money but the thing that got me
00:27:56
it's that was donated by 1420 people so
00:28:00
it was not someone coming in with a big
00:28:02
lump sum that was like a whole lot of
00:28:03
little donations that's a that's a lot
00:28:05
of people who obviously have
00:28:08
um some sort of connection or some sort
00:28:10
of feeling towards you guys which is
00:28:12
hugely humbling we were really Blown
00:28:14
Away by you know when Ellie came and saw
00:28:16
me in ICU she said um you know there's
00:28:18
twenty seven thousand dollars and I give
00:28:19
a little page
00:28:21
how have we influenced that many
00:28:22
people's lives lines you know like if
00:28:24
you think about Dom that all the passing
00:28:25
interactions you've had with other human
00:28:27
are enough of them positive that um
00:28:30
but don't I remember Dom I'd like to do
00:28:32
something
00:28:33
we're talking thousands of people that
00:28:35
were yeah I didn't even know that was
00:28:37
possible you know through our business
00:28:38
we have obviously a lot of interactions
00:28:40
with people many thousands of of
00:28:42
athletes that we've coached in the last
00:28:43
six years but um you think you're just a
00:28:46
small Cog in the system you know like
00:28:47
you stand on a Finish Line you cheer
00:28:49
athletes in
00:28:50
um you know you help athletes achieve
00:28:51
their um you know their running goals or
00:28:53
those sorts of things but you never
00:28:55
really think you know we've treated them
00:28:56
like humans and as friends and you know
00:28:58
with kindness and with love and
00:29:00
compassion but you never expected to
00:29:03
come back
00:29:04
um and you know you mentioned that give
00:29:05
it all that's just the New Zealand one
00:29:07
we've got one in Australia as well and
00:29:09
um again the outpouring of support there
00:29:12
has been overwhelming watching videos of
00:29:14
people you know raise money they did a a
00:29:17
virtual event a couple of weeks ago and
00:29:19
um you know everyone got out and they
00:29:21
they ran they went and got groups of
00:29:24
people together and they ran and
00:29:27
to support us and uh it's a I don't even
00:29:30
know where to begin with it you know you
00:29:31
think even if you think about imagine
00:29:33
your own funeral people do someone's
00:29:35
reading a eulogy how many people in the
00:29:37
room is it is it thousands Dom do you
00:29:39
think there's thousands of people want
00:29:40
to see you off I can't believe how many
00:29:42
people have supported us yeah
00:29:44
um getting money out of people it's a
00:29:46
hard thing as well no it really is it's
00:29:50
one of the house like it's easy to write
00:29:51
a comment on Facebook like oh Kerry get
00:29:53
well soon but to take that next step and
00:29:55
donate money to someone that you've had
00:29:57
a brush with we never asked for it
00:29:59
either you know like um it's not we
00:30:01
didn't set it up it was some one of our
00:30:03
athletes did and and you know like maybe
00:30:06
a small post somewhere I don't really
00:30:07
know but when they they said that they
00:30:09
wanted to start one and I was like no no
00:30:12
just donate money to the first response
00:30:14
in the forest they helped Kerry or
00:30:16
Westpac rescue helicopter or something
00:30:18
like that like we don't need it
00:30:20
um but then in hindsight it's been
00:30:22
amazing because there is you know like
00:30:24
there is support via um ACC and the dhbs
00:30:29
and stuff but like I've probably spent
00:30:32
over ten thousand on accommodation and
00:30:35
that is hopefully going to be reimbursed
00:30:37
but it hasn't yet and also Like New
00:30:40
clothing for Kerry because you you can't
00:30:42
wear things with pockets underneath like
00:30:45
cause a precious sore I said so yeah I
00:30:49
wouldn't think of anything like that but
00:30:50
where you go up a size in your Footwear
00:30:52
what you guys have a size on your why
00:30:54
because of you know blood pooling and
00:30:57
the potential for precious sores I can't
00:30:59
move my feet blood comes back so
00:31:01
everything pulls down there yeah and and
00:31:03
one of the other downsides to the injury
00:31:05
is um I'm always freezing cold now so
00:31:07
even you know you're on a t-shirt I'm in
00:31:09
two layers and I'm considering a third
00:31:12
um some people have the opposite so so
00:31:14
your nervous system controls all of
00:31:16
these things and that's being disrupted
00:31:18
so
00:31:19
um yes people with spinal cords present
00:31:22
a lot injuries present in a lot of
00:31:24
different ways and for Kerry he was
00:31:25
freezing so I've gone out and bought
00:31:27
puffered jackets and blankets and you
00:31:30
know beanies and even a snood or much to
00:31:32
my desk
00:31:35
it's like a a scarf tube this sounds
00:31:40
sounds cozy it doesn't look great
00:31:43
I'm very happy when you see me in a
00:31:45
smooth yeah and a woman beanie that's uh
00:31:48
in the middle of the Auckland Sun yeah
00:31:51
yeah it's warm here today yeah 22 or 23
00:31:54
and he's runned up like he's an
00:31:56
Antarctica so I mean is that money gonna
00:31:59
go fat what do you do with it you build
00:32:00
a ramp at home or is that paid for
00:32:02
our um the rehab that I have to do out
00:32:05
of here
00:32:06
not a lot of it's really supported by
00:32:08
ACC they do obviously bits and pieces
00:32:10
with physios and the like but um you
00:32:12
know to see a neurophysio and and get
00:32:15
hooked up to machines that might
00:32:16
actually help me get some of my muscles
00:32:18
back
00:32:18
we're talking four thousand dollars a
00:32:20
month so
00:32:22
yeah potentially depending where we go
00:32:23
so we want to and you know
00:32:26
like
00:32:27
technology evolves
00:32:30
with money available will mean that we
00:32:32
can just go yeah we want to give this a
00:32:34
crack while we can so
00:32:36
um that is that is yeah really good and
00:32:38
I mean there's lots of earnings as well
00:32:40
for like on on my behalf and ACC pay 80
00:32:43
of Kerry's salary which is amazing so
00:32:45
how long do you how long do you get the
00:32:47
80 for
00:32:48
admiring
00:32:51
unless he changes his workload like you
00:32:54
know maybe so there is we didn't talk
00:32:56
about that really before but there is
00:32:57
potential for surgeries for Kerry so
00:33:00
nerve transfer surgery because there's
00:33:02
two so when you if you hold your fist
00:33:05
out in front of you and then you rotate
00:33:07
it so that your palm is facing up yeah
00:33:10
there are two nerves that control that
00:33:11
movement and they can take the one from
00:33:13
the inside move it to the the you know
00:33:17
the top of your arm and then that will
00:33:19
create an open and close of the fingers
00:33:22
so you could end up with a you know a
00:33:24
clinch graph right and masturbation it's
00:33:27
great it's looking pretty good okay
00:33:31
that four inches won't be lonely for
00:33:33
long dogs
00:33:39
oh wow geez we live in a good country
00:33:41
don't we like to have the health care
00:33:42
that we've got and the support systems
00:33:44
and place that we've got where yeah the
00:33:45
surgery that we get is amazing yeah so I
00:33:48
can potentially get some other surgery I
00:33:49
call Troy's surgery where they move a um
00:33:52
a muscle from my shoulder and it'll do
00:33:54
the job of my triceps a little bit so
00:33:57
I won't punch myself in the face when I
00:33:59
got to scratch my nose or anything like
00:34:01
that so yeah have you found like for
00:34:04
YouTube being um being like old
00:34:06
translates and being super fat and I
00:34:09
suppose having that runner's mentality
00:34:10
where you put one foot in front of the
00:34:11
other is um has that sort of helped do
00:34:14
you think yeah definitely so you've run
00:34:17
you've run marathons obviously and you
00:34:19
know what it's like at 35 kilometers
00:34:21
when you're like this is a bad place to
00:34:23
be this is
00:34:25
um that's where I live you know so um at
00:34:28
the moment oh that's where that's where
00:34:30
I exist forever right there's kind of
00:34:31
like there's no because there's no way
00:34:33
out of us this is the worst that it
00:34:34
could be right so it's not that early
00:34:36
part of the race where you're feeling
00:34:37
great the body's moving fine and you you
00:34:39
think the PBS today
00:34:41
um and it's not that bit when you're
00:34:42
near the finish line and you realize you
00:34:43
know I'm going to make it this is great
00:34:44
you know I'm going to get there I'm
00:34:45
stuck in the [ __ ] bit so um I'm in a
00:34:48
giant turd pile with a tiny shovel and
00:34:50
um and I've got nothing there's nothing
00:34:52
to do but smile about it right
00:34:53
attitude's the only thing you've got so
00:34:54
you know in those spots when you are
00:34:56
suffering the most you know the best
00:34:58
thing that you can do is go calm
00:34:59
yourself be centered and realize that
00:35:01
you've done the work and um you know
00:35:03
you've got to have a good positive
00:35:04
outlook you know otherwise you're going
00:35:06
to derail your rates just slow down you
00:35:07
lose momentum um and their PB will sneak
00:35:10
away so yeah I think running has really
00:35:12
set me up well for this
00:35:14
it's an ultra marathon that you know I'm
00:35:16
in that I'm for those that have run
00:35:17
Saturday 100K I'm stuck on West no
00:35:19
Katana and in the middle of the night
00:35:21
spewing in the bushes and um and it's
00:35:23
never going to be better than that so
00:35:25
yeah it's the middle of the night and
00:35:27
you're spewing in the bush but you're
00:35:28
still doing it with a smile on your face
00:35:29
that's all you can do and Ultra Runners
00:35:31
know this right you're laughing whilst
00:35:33
you're having this terrible experience
00:35:34
you know you never chafe so bad in your
00:35:36
life and uh and yeah this is uh this is
00:35:39
well I'm starting to not dress up ultra
00:35:41
marathon very well but uh come try it
00:35:44
out it's a lot of fun okay so um so
00:35:48
let's do our squad run so you guys you
00:35:49
guys meet you got together and then um
00:35:51
when was some Squadron born pretty much
00:35:54
in that moment you know it was um
00:35:56
what were you doing before that I was uh
00:35:59
uh network security analyst so
00:36:02
um I would I work in
00:36:03
big International clients to uh keep the
00:36:06
bad guys out um
00:36:07
so that was fun and that was a
00:36:10
long-standing it career and it it paid
00:36:12
very well but it had a very beige
00:36:13
existence you know right it wasn't very
00:36:15
fulfilling so um I think Squadron
00:36:18
started I figured I figured out a system
00:36:20
for coaching
00:36:22
scalable method of supporting athletes
00:36:25
without charging them too much money and
00:36:28
um and I put it to the tarawera group
00:36:31
and uh a lot of athletes immediately
00:36:33
jumped on board and I realized that you
00:36:35
know I had something here I had a way of
00:36:36
helping lots of people and that's I
00:36:39
think the founding thought behind
00:36:41
Squadron is how how can I help more
00:36:44
people because most running coaches you
00:36:46
know are in the laborious task of you
00:36:48
know helping a handful of
00:36:51
privately coached athletes and um you
00:36:53
know you can handle 20 maybe 30 of those
00:36:55
athletes before the book's full and I
00:36:57
was like that's not acceptable there are
00:36:59
more people than that that need support
00:37:00
and I must find a way to do it
00:37:02
and so Squadron was born out of that and
00:37:05
um that was six years ago and uh we sort
00:37:07
of started working with some of the
00:37:08
bigger events like Old Trail Australia
00:37:10
and now Ultra Trail costusko Queenstown
00:37:12
Marathon um and just helping as many
00:37:15
athletes as we can and uh
00:37:17
it's been I think
00:37:20
three to four thousand athletes we've
00:37:21
worked with in the last six years
00:37:23
and and you know they're not just
00:37:25
numbers to us these people you know we
00:37:28
know the name of the dogs you know
00:37:30
they're they're welcome in our homes so
00:37:32
they're friends which is reflected and I
00:37:34
guess they give a little which you've
00:37:35
talked about before
00:37:37
um you know we're really committed in
00:37:38
their lives we're there at the Finish
00:37:39
Lines of the major you know even events
00:37:42
that we don't have heaps of athletes out
00:37:43
we want to be there
00:37:45
see people finish and have that
00:37:46
experience
00:37:47
um and I don't know why other coaches
00:37:49
aren't you know like you very really I
00:37:52
know running coaches
00:37:54
why aren't they at events that's payday
00:37:56
that's when you see your athlete do the
00:37:58
thing forget the money they've paid you
00:37:59
see their smile on the Finish Line watch
00:38:01
them cry when they achieve the thing
00:38:03
that they didn't believe they could do
00:38:05
only you did
00:38:07
um it's a special moment for us and uh I
00:38:09
think you know having had have helped
00:38:11
thousands of people it's been um
00:38:14
you know really special to be part of
00:38:16
Squadron and uh you're definitely not
00:38:17
going to let that go and uh you know I
00:38:19
want to get back on those tools as soon
00:38:21
as possible God you are so much passion
00:38:23
now you can just hear it I'll tell you
00:38:24
what a funny thing I've I've had another
00:38:25
guy on the podcast um Barry McGee who
00:38:27
won a bronze medal at the 90s 1960 Rome
00:38:30
Olympics so he's uh he's in his late 80s
00:38:32
now charges people something like oh
00:38:35
five dollars a month I think to do their
00:38:36
programs and he then he goes out and
00:38:38
watches them race and he gets he gets
00:38:40
satisfaction out of it because it's like
00:38:42
they're almost living vicariously I
00:38:44
guess through his athletes yeah
00:38:46
absolutely as an athlete myself
00:38:49
um you know I was competitive and I
00:38:51
tried really hard and you know achieved
00:38:52
lots of things I won staff as it was
00:38:54
records and all the stuff that an
00:38:56
athlete could be really proud of and you
00:38:58
know have all the trophies in the pool
00:39:00
room but
00:39:01
um weirdly when I became a running coach
00:39:03
I realized that it wasn't just My
00:39:04
Success that mattered it was other
00:39:06
people's success so rather than having
00:39:07
that one moment where you cross the
00:39:08
finish line stop your watch and see what
00:39:10
you've achieved you can stand on that
00:39:12
finish line and see what hundreds of
00:39:13
people have achieved and you have those
00:39:15
same those same moments that same
00:39:18
sensation when you know you've gifted
00:39:20
that to someone else so um you know it's
00:39:22
just it's it's way more rewarding to be
00:39:24
a running coach in that scenario than to
00:39:26
be the athlete themselves and so
00:39:27
barriers epitomizes that and I know some
00:39:30
of us athletes and and they speak very
00:39:31
highly of him in that and that that
00:39:33
nominal charge is just so you know
00:39:35
you've got to have some skin in the game
00:39:36
right The Athlete's got some skin in the
00:39:38
game and the coach has got to ask them
00:39:39
yes yeah so that's kind of why Spiderman
00:39:41
is sort of set up at that sort of you
00:39:43
know very low price price point to help
00:39:45
you know help athletes that wouldn't
00:39:46
otherwise want to invest 40 or 50 bucks
00:39:49
a week in a private running coach yeah
00:39:50
how much is it we'll get some plugs in
00:39:53
here for squadron oh I know what are we
00:39:54
like 15 bucks yeah 15 plus GST yeah
00:39:58
yeah and so we'll give them a tailored
00:40:01
running program and it's Unique to them
00:40:03
and specific to the event and uh we
00:40:05
provide all the support for it so you
00:40:07
know obviously with coaching you know
00:40:08
people think it's a running plan and
00:40:10
that's that's all that that coaching is
00:40:11
but it's so much more than that because
00:40:13
you know the athletes need to know you
00:40:14
know when you're talking about an ultra
00:40:16
then into all the details about um
00:40:19
you know you're fueling and hydration
00:40:20
and understanding the course and
00:40:22
executing a good run you know there's a
00:40:24
psychology of it that really matters
00:40:26
it's all the little things that go with
00:40:27
it as well the whole holistic thing yeah
00:40:29
yeah I mean you've written some great
00:40:30
articles online there's actually one one
00:40:31
that you wrote about a year ago about um
00:40:33
yeah mine's here yes and it's like I
00:40:35
thought it's so applicable to the
00:40:37
situation you're in now like it's
00:40:39
transferable yeah that um there's a
00:40:42
fascinating meta-analysis of a lot of
00:40:45
the research they do on the psychology
00:40:47
of running the um I think it's a
00:40:50
psychological determinants of whole body
00:40:51
endurance performance and um and in that
00:40:54
that breakdown are many of the different
00:40:55
research papers that have been done on
00:40:57
the psychology of endurance athletes and
00:40:59
and it is absolutely applicable to this
00:41:01
situation there are three key things
00:41:03
that came from and one of them is to
00:41:05
have a mantra right to to be able to
00:41:07
repeat yourself in this situation I say
00:41:09
what can I do today what is it I can do
00:41:10
today so how can I progress with
00:41:12
my purpose so what is it I can do today
00:41:14
and my brother gave me that mantra that
00:41:16
helped um there's um
00:41:19
positive imagery right so um surrounding
00:41:22
yourself with you know um just simply a
00:41:24
smiling face on the side of a
00:41:27
Marathon course
00:41:29
we'll cheer you up you know someone
00:41:30
cheering you on it makes a difference
00:41:32
you know if I put you on a treadmill
00:41:33
told you to run as fast as you could you
00:41:35
would actually run faster if there were
00:41:37
people cheering you on if I revealed a
00:41:38
curtain and there was all your family
00:41:39
and friends and a small grandstand
00:41:41
cheering you on you could go harder and
00:41:42
faster and so we know that so um again
00:41:45
having that positive energy around you
00:41:47
having obviously people like Ali but
00:41:49
even photos on the wall
00:41:50
family and friends so that positive
00:41:52
imagery is really important as well and
00:41:54
the other one is goal setting so um
00:41:56
athletes need to be able to set goals
00:41:58
and not just major goals like I want to
00:41:59
break 120 half marathon it could be I
00:42:03
went on strong to the next aid station
00:42:05
right so I'm going to think about my
00:42:06
form and body position and you know like
00:42:08
all the things that I know are important
00:42:09
my Cadence and my breathing or whatever
00:42:11
it might be um and so you set that small
00:42:13
goal you reach that aid station and
00:42:15
you've got to achieve that goal I got
00:42:17
some success from that I feel good now
00:42:18
set a new goal I'm going to run well to
00:42:20
the top of that Hill up there so even
00:42:22
just goal sitting at that level is
00:42:23
really useful right and you can see how
00:42:25
that's obviously transferable to my
00:42:26
current situation as well what is it I
00:42:28
can do in the gym
00:42:29
can I do 45 minutes on the apple and
00:42:31
cycle like can I spend an hour on my
00:42:33
manual chair today you know like those
00:42:35
sorts of goals you can break your life
00:42:36
down into setting goals and achieving
00:42:38
them the same way as squirrel gathers
00:42:40
nuts for the winter it's one little nut
00:42:42
at a time and you set those goals and
00:42:43
you can achieve great things and it ends
00:42:45
up being hundreds of nuts stored for the
00:42:47
winter wow there's so many good
00:42:48
takeaways here everyone deals with with
00:42:50
their own degree of [ __ ] at some point
00:42:52
in their life like most people won't
00:42:54
deal with the degree of [ __ ] that you're
00:42:55
dealing with right now but so many good
00:42:58
takeaways from this so many things that
00:43:00
any person can apply to their own life
00:43:01
yeah look I don't want to discredit
00:43:04
depression we have a major problem with
00:43:05
team suicide and mental health in New
00:43:07
Zealand
00:43:08
and you know there's a lot of people
00:43:10
everyone's going through something or
00:43:11
has been through something but um look
00:43:13
if you've had a tough day on social
00:43:15
media and um
00:43:17
things aren't going so great for you and
00:43:19
the black dogs come to visit please
00:43:20
frame your depression with what I'm
00:43:22
going through you know look what other
00:43:24
people are going through as well because
00:43:25
it might just help to understand that
00:43:27
everyone's going through something and
00:43:28
and many people are going through
00:43:29
something worse yeah well the funny
00:43:31
thing is you mentioned Brett um he was a
00:43:33
wakeboarder that had an accident and
00:43:35
landed on a ramp about seven years ago
00:43:37
he would give anything to have the arm
00:43:40
movement that you've got he would look
00:43:42
at you with so much Envy it's the thing
00:43:45
it's a tough it's easy to do here
00:43:47
comparison is a thief of Joy isn't it
00:43:48
wouldn't you like discover 70 minutes
00:43:50
for a for a half marathon or 65 minutes
00:43:52
for a half marathon right you beat
00:43:54
yourself up these days I'll do anything
00:43:55
for someone 30. yeah yeah you try so
00:43:58
hard and yeah in general we succeed but
00:44:00
fail is part of the process storm you
00:44:01
know you failed the first time you tried
00:44:03
to walk you know you failed a talking
00:44:05
for many years you failed the first time
00:44:07
you tried to ride your bike you know
00:44:08
like I felt the first time I tried to
00:44:09
ride my bike and the last time I tried
00:44:11
to ride my ride my bike which is rather
00:44:13
ironic but
00:44:14
[Laughter]
00:44:18
failure is part of the process right and
00:44:20
uh you know
00:44:22
you have to be okay with that that's
00:44:24
that's important part of it you know and
00:44:26
and seeing and not being able not
00:44:27
comparing yourself to others I look in
00:44:29
the gym here and there's people that are
00:44:31
standing up and walking around and you
00:44:33
know I'm really happy with them but
00:44:34
[ __ ] annoys me to see their you know
00:44:36
their success when I I know that's not
00:44:38
for me that'll never be me so um uh if
00:44:41
there's that be happy with who you are
00:44:42
and Achieve what you can for a fat I.T
00:44:45
guy I did an incredible job you know
00:44:47
cobbling together a running career and
00:44:49
then learning a lot about running and
00:44:50
did you say fat I think like we have a
00:44:52
fat I was important
00:44:54
he wasn't that bad all right by my own
00:44:57
measure yeah
00:45:01
25 kilos less now yeah when are you when
00:45:03
are you writing a book has anyone
00:45:05
approached you you've um no I don't you
00:45:08
you've got some what no this has been
00:45:10
really actually this has been really
00:45:11
liberating for my ego but even
00:45:13
previously um you know I didn't I never
00:45:16
was in a situation where I felt like um
00:45:18
I'm okay with my immortality I've got a
00:45:20
story to tell but um no one needs to
00:45:22
hear it life is um life's full of fun or
00:45:24
interesting people than me
00:45:26
uh this is no I don't know by no measure
00:45:30
would I like to
00:45:32
I don't like being in a spotlight as
00:45:33
much I make a lot of noise I can hold a
00:45:35
microphone and talk in front of
00:45:36
thousands of people Tom you're probably
00:45:37
familiar with this but actually you
00:45:39
actually don't necessarily always want
00:45:41
to be the center of a teacher and life
00:45:43
doesn't have to be about you okay never
00:45:44
enough I feel like um your your story
00:45:47
and your perspective and your outlook it
00:45:49
could um be helpful to other people
00:45:51
so not just a not just like a an ego
00:45:53
boost thing I'm caring this is my story
00:45:55
but it's like just the way that you
00:45:57
frame things it could be so helpful to
00:45:59
other people I would actually like to
00:46:01
see him like probably a month or so ago
00:46:04
I'd send to some friends I'd really like
00:46:06
to see Kerry going to schools and talk
00:46:08
to kids because I think there's a lot of
00:46:11
learning to be had in our community
00:46:12
about spinal cord injuries and also you
00:46:15
know mindset and
00:46:17
um how to successfully land a good jump
00:46:19
oh yeah yeah yeah well no you're not the
00:46:22
guy for that guy I succeeded sometimes
00:46:25
before I failed as well yeah yeah I look
00:46:28
I like helping people but um you know
00:46:30
really my focus is on how do I help
00:46:34
Ordinary People achieve
00:46:37
real people achieve extraordinary things
00:46:40
um this is one of the cool things about
00:46:41
you know running is it's not an
00:46:43
exclusive sport you know we welcome
00:46:45
everyone yes and uh particularly in
00:46:47
trail running it's like incredibly
00:46:48
welcoming you know and Squadron was
00:46:51
never built around how do we help the
00:46:52
top tendency to people
00:46:54
we help you know 80 of the people
00:46:58
Kerry thought
00:47:01
all the people that took their [ __ ]
00:47:02
super seriously paying him for running
00:47:04
coaching and it ended up being people
00:47:07
like me that are just you know like
00:47:10
mid-pack want to know how to do it right
00:47:13
and get support
00:47:16
um so I mean we coach the whole Spectrum
00:47:18
right like we've coached the Winner's
00:47:20
probably the very last finisher and that
00:47:23
was I think a bit of a shock for you
00:47:24
right when we started was but these
00:47:27
people you know
00:47:28
for 100k and now they're currently
00:47:32
running five to ten K's like how the
00:47:34
heck are we going to get them there
00:47:36
um but and that but that's also where
00:47:39
the beauty is you know like seeing these
00:47:41
people that have such huge progressions
00:47:44
or that have a lot of you know just real
00:47:47
lives doing these really cool things and
00:47:50
being there to share that moment at the
00:47:52
finish line is is really special you
00:47:55
just see that rawness and emotion and
00:47:57
know this story and it's a really big
00:48:00
reward God you guys both really do care
00:48:02
don't you if someone's listening to this
00:48:04
that's like a non-runner that is maybe
00:48:05
like contemplating during their first
00:48:07
half or 10K or whatever
00:48:09
um would Squadron be for them
00:48:10
start by building some Foundation I
00:48:12
think before you before you take on a
00:48:14
running program just uh you know do
00:48:17
you want to know you can paddle out
00:48:18
before you swim so running I started I
00:48:22
couldn't run two k's
00:48:24
um and uh and that that was really the
00:48:26
the goal was to see if I could get up to
00:48:28
running 2ks at a time and then I sort of
00:48:30
set myself to a goal to try and do it
00:48:32
for 100 days and then at the end of that
00:48:34
um you know a little bit of Fitness came
00:48:36
on so um I would say if you if you
00:48:38
aren't a runner and you're considering
00:48:40
you know you'd love to be a runner is
00:48:41
get out you know
00:48:43
to find the the old lawn mowing shoe to
00:48:45
start with and and get out there and it
00:48:47
doesn't have to be a run it doesn't have
00:48:49
to be fancy it can be walking breaks it
00:48:51
can be mostly walking it could be
00:48:52
periods of jogging but don't set the
00:48:54
goal too high you know the 2K Hood run
00:48:57
around the block is is all that it takes
00:48:59
to get going
00:49:00
um it takes patience and consistency
00:49:03
it doesn't take Natural talent I would I
00:49:05
would hate to see um people think that
00:49:08
they aren't able to do something because
00:49:09
they don't have the right genes for it
00:49:11
or they're maybe too heavy or you're
00:49:13
worried what other people are going to
00:49:14
think um
00:49:15
you know there's two there's two types
00:49:17
of people that see you running there's
00:49:19
there's Runners that see you running no
00:49:22
matter who you are running awkwardly
00:49:23
down the road and they're supportive and
00:49:24
they're like look at that person running
00:49:26
they're doing a great job and then
00:49:28
there's those other people that don't
00:49:29
think climbing off you and you know what
00:49:30
go [ __ ] those people you're not they're
00:49:32
not there to support you who cares right
00:49:35
I sort of think um because a lot of
00:49:37
people are very self-conscious whether
00:49:38
it's going to the gym or whether it's
00:49:39
running and you worry about what other
00:49:41
people think when you realize that every
00:49:43
single person to a degree is worried
00:49:44
about whatever I'm thinks and you
00:49:45
realize they're just thinking about
00:49:46
themselves and they're not actually
00:49:47
thinking about you all that much you can
00:49:49
just get on with things yeah but I do
00:49:51
agree with what you're saying the people
00:49:52
that those that small portion of people
00:49:54
that do think unkindly or say mean
00:49:56
things yeah [ __ ] them yeah who cares
00:49:57
yeah here's what they think they're not
00:49:59
a part of your life
00:50:00
you're out there doing it that's right
00:50:01
and it's the same look I'm in a chair
00:50:03
and I'm in a powered chair and you can
00:50:05
I'm sorry listeners this is a large bit
00:50:07
of Machinery that I can operate with um
00:50:09
a wrist basically and uh it looks
00:50:12
ungainly it's not I'm not disabled like
00:50:14
an ordinary manual wheelchair I'm in
00:50:16
sort of you know some big it's a big
00:50:18
black heavy battery-powered machine and
00:50:21
um I look disabled you know like this is
00:50:24
this is serious
00:50:25
um and and I take it out in public and
00:50:27
uh do I care what other people think of
00:50:30
when they see this thing no I don't I
00:50:32
choose not to let that get to me if I
00:50:33
felt like that I would never go outside
00:50:35
so um I'm just not gonna let it I'm
00:50:37
going to let other people
00:50:38
opinion of me holding back and it
00:50:40
shouldn't no matter what you're doing
00:50:41
you know yeah well I mean with with you
00:50:43
when you approach people I suppose
00:50:45
they'll notice the chair first but then
00:50:47
as soon as you open your mouth and speak
00:50:48
your personality is big enough that you
00:50:51
sort of forget about the chair the chair
00:50:52
becomes invisible and I realized that
00:50:54
was the only time I felt you know I feel
00:50:55
really normal is when I'm just in
00:50:57
conversation with someone else when they
00:50:59
realize that I'm still the same human
00:51:00
being and we have the same chats you
00:51:02
know when I've been able to catch up
00:51:04
with mates yeah there's nothing when I'm
00:51:05
online on Discord or whatever gender
00:51:07
friends
00:51:08
um and I'm still the same person I'm
00:51:09
sort of the same voice to the same sense
00:51:11
of humor still the same deck bag that I
00:51:13
was before
00:51:14
but with this is one thing that I've
00:51:17
learned actually is that people that
00:51:19
have had a disability forced upon them
00:51:22
are the probably the most bravest and
00:51:25
resilient and determined people that
00:51:26
you'll meet so how do you mean just
00:51:28
because that had to be yeah they've had
00:51:29
to be they've got through bloody most
00:51:31
[ __ ] situation that you can probably
00:51:33
think of and they've shown up day after
00:51:36
day giving it their best and somehow
00:51:38
managed to carry on living their lives
00:51:41
and like when you see them you should
00:51:43
just go man that person must be freaking
00:51:46
tough
00:51:47
to be living their life in that
00:51:49
situation sorry if I made it look easy
00:51:51
this is [ __ ] hard this is
00:51:54
you do make it look easy I mean but but
00:51:57
I'm I'm here with you the I suppose that
00:52:00
the admin of the morning's done like
00:52:01
you've had your bowels cleared you've
00:52:03
had someone dress you you're wearing a
00:52:05
cool pair of wool all birds you've got a
00:52:08
ultra marathon hat on yep you just look
00:52:10
like a cool dude in a chair but I I I I
00:52:13
haven't seen the hard work or the hours
00:52:14
that it took this morning to get to get
00:52:16
to this point yeah it's two hours to get
00:52:18
uh
00:52:19
in two to three hours so
00:52:21
yeah it's a lot of work
00:52:22
um any problem and a frustrating
00:52:24
Reliance on
00:52:31
other end you know just wanted to be in
00:52:33
charge of his own life and so that's
00:52:36
been a real hard pill to swallow with
00:52:38
while I was going you know like I I need
00:52:40
people to help me each day and I'm
00:52:43
reliant on them and their time frames
00:52:45
yeah actually um your bread smell of the
00:52:47
weight water he said a similar thing to
00:52:48
me heck he's an A type personality you
00:52:50
know perfectionist like things done a
00:52:52
certain way and now he's got these um
00:52:53
caregivers who he he described as being
00:52:56
woefully underpaid and they can't they
00:52:59
can't always get things done the
00:53:01
meticulous way he likes them done are
00:53:03
you gonna be okay with it oh yeah if you
00:53:05
want to see frustration you um you give
00:53:07
someone with add a spinal cord injury
00:53:09
because uh yeah Brad's probably a lot
00:53:11
like me is very jittery and wants to do
00:53:13
things all the time so um yeah you're in
00:53:15
a better inability to do things Western
00:53:16
Union [ __ ] I've got arms but no hands
00:53:19
right so I can't actually do anything
00:53:20
and I describe Ali doesn't like it I
00:53:23
describe as sort of like a ghost you
00:53:24
know if you've imagined what it's like
00:53:25
to be a ghost you could be in a room and
00:53:27
you can interact but you can't you you
00:53:29
can't actually physically do anything
00:53:30
and uh you know I just I sit in a chair
00:53:33
and I I think about how great it would
00:53:34
be if I could put it put a t-shirt on or
00:53:36
or take a t-shirt off you know like I
00:53:37
put my shoes on or off or you know pull
00:53:39
a weed or do anything I can't interact
00:53:42
with the world in any way I can't
00:53:43
operate a TV remote you know like um you
00:53:46
know I exist but I you know I can talk
00:53:48
but I can't do much else and but that's
00:53:50
that interaction is actually so vital
00:53:53
like if you see Kerry in the dining room
00:53:54
here he's holding court with the other
00:53:56
guys and you know entertaining them and
00:53:59
also cheering them on and sharing the
00:54:02
highs and the lows and so he still has a
00:54:05
lot of power but it's just
00:54:07
such a physical power why don't you like
00:54:09
the um description where he calls
00:54:11
himself a ghost
00:54:13
um because he'll
00:54:15
have no hand I have no legs and I'm like
00:54:17
you still have hands and legs like I
00:54:19
feel like he still needs to really
00:54:21
um
00:54:22
appreciate and recognize that those
00:54:25
parts of his body because they've given
00:54:27
him so much over the years and keep that
00:54:30
you know the thought and connection
00:54:31
there just in case we can get whatever
00:54:34
we can back so I just think you know
00:54:36
there's there is potential for
00:54:39
neuroplasticity and the power of the
00:54:41
mind and keeping engaged with them
00:54:44
rather than kind of becoming
00:54:46
disenfranchised to this part of your
00:54:48
body that's not cooperating how you want
00:54:50
it to
00:54:51
uh I was just wiping his eyes you're
00:54:54
right have you had a day so far that
00:54:56
you've been in here that you haven't
00:54:57
cried
00:54:58
oh good question uh
00:55:01
no I don't most days I think I get
00:55:03
through
00:55:04
uh some days are hard just you don't you
00:55:06
don't know why you know like that's the
00:55:08
Human Condition isn't it some days you
00:55:09
wake up and
00:55:10
you just for some reason you're halfway
00:55:12
through a [ __ ] sandwich and you don't
00:55:13
know why
00:55:14
so uh
00:55:16
I know most days I'm pretty good if I
00:55:18
can you know think about
00:55:21
no it's the other around actually
00:55:23
I think it's the bad thoughts are like
00:55:25
leaves in a stream you know like you
00:55:27
think about one [ __ ] thing like I can't
00:55:29
even roll over a bed and then you think
00:55:31
about another [ __ ] thing it's like ah I
00:55:32
would like to do something about the
00:55:34
heat pump in here but I can't push a
00:55:35
button and you think about how
00:55:38
depressing it might be that I can't you
00:55:39
know I'm going to have a baby but I
00:55:40
can't hold it you know if you let all
00:55:42
those leaves build up you'll block the
00:55:43
stream and then when you get that that
00:55:45
situation you cause a flood and that and
00:55:47
that's when you have it that you stuck
00:55:48
in a
00:55:50
a negative Loop there so
00:55:52
I think I try to acknowledge that
00:55:54
there's a bad thought but don't chase it
00:55:56
and don't add to it
00:55:57
to it and then you know immediately try
00:55:59
and pivot to finding some positive you
00:56:01
know Outlook like what can I do today
00:56:02
and what have I got coming up today and
00:56:05
uh you know what's the progress what's
00:56:06
my purpose where will I be in two years
00:56:08
time those sort of things
00:56:10
you're finding finding the positive
00:56:12
approach to to
00:56:13
not focus on the bad thoughts have you
00:56:16
been seeing a therapist or anyone they
00:56:18
provide them here but actually last few
00:56:20
times I've said we're good if you want
00:56:22
to talk about tying shoelaces um
00:56:25
yeah have you seen a therapist in your
00:56:28
life
00:56:30
not prior to being here no
00:56:32
it's quite funny because like some of
00:56:34
the stuff you see I've I've seen
00:56:36
therapists over the years and it's like
00:56:37
some of the stuff that you were saying
00:56:38
it's like you just instinctively know it
00:56:40
and that's um stuff you've been taught
00:56:41
like a therapist said to me if you find
00:56:43
yourself having negative thoughts or bad
00:56:44
thoughts you know catch yourself and say
00:56:46
is this helpful and then if it's not
00:56:48
then flush it away
00:56:50
so it's almost like you just
00:56:52
instinctively know this stuff which is
00:56:53
why you got to write that book oh
00:56:58
they don't suffer with
00:56:59
them
00:57:02
yeah it's it's funny I never really um I
00:57:05
understood a lot of people did suffer
00:57:07
mental health prior to this and uh you
00:57:09
know I appreciate the problems that
00:57:10
they're going through and and really
00:57:11
feel for them but uh realize at the same
00:57:13
time you know you have that little voice
00:57:15
in the back
00:57:16
to choose to be happy
00:57:18
and you know which shows that shows a
00:57:21
complete lack of of understanding of the
00:57:22
scenario because that's always been my
00:57:24
way out of it's like I just well I just
00:57:26
choose to be happy but maybe I'm too
00:57:28
dumb and that I don't that I don't get
00:57:30
caught up on those things I don't I
00:57:32
don't know man I don't know like I think
00:57:34
there are there are people that have um
00:57:35
like clinical depression and there's
00:57:37
like an imbalance in their brain that
00:57:38
needs medication to help but for I mean
00:57:41
if everyone else um you know there's
00:57:42
physical health and there's mental
00:57:43
health and uh you've got to do
00:57:46
everything you can for your own mental
00:57:47
health like if you're feeling bad like
00:57:49
drink more water or eat better food or
00:57:51
yeah get more sleep or cut back on the
00:57:53
alcohol but I do everything you can
00:57:56
prioritize that [ __ ] and then if it's
00:57:58
still no good then go and see a doctor
00:58:00
you know I was lucky to have well as I
00:58:02
said lucky to have um
00:58:05
psychological support here um which
00:58:07
obviously is very well needed and I see
00:58:10
a lot of the patients really
00:58:11
Acquired and really
00:58:13
I mean I certainly did in the first few
00:58:15
weeks and uh you know I remember just
00:58:16
balling for you know an hour at a time
00:58:18
so that they're boiling for an hour at a
00:58:21
time was that just like I suppose like
00:58:23
morning
00:58:24
yeah it's grieving yeah absolutely yeah
00:58:26
yep yep it's a it's a loss of a life you
00:58:28
know I miss my old life I had a perfect
00:58:31
existence I felt like I was you know we
00:58:33
would coach for 10 to 12 hours a day but
00:58:35
you know um
00:58:38
sometimes and uh well there's a lot more
00:58:41
than that less than that it used to be
00:58:42
it used to be diabolical we used to let
00:58:44
the work really inundate us and we would
00:58:46
often be coaching until 10 pm at night
00:58:48
to close the laptop and go to bed but um
00:58:50
my life was I would say perfect I never
00:58:53
felt like I needed to change anything so
00:58:55
I felt like at 44 I'd finally arrived
00:58:57
and uh and then I guess some greater
00:59:00
power decided that I needed to change
00:59:02
direction in a serious way and learn
00:59:04
something else about life so
00:59:07
yeah Kerry had been worried on like
00:59:10
before with the pregnancy that this baby
00:59:12
was going to mess up our life that it
00:59:14
was just a major change and
00:59:16
um
00:59:19
it was quite
00:59:21
um yeah
00:59:24
yeah I've got some compounding issues
00:59:26
here so cumulatively difficult now are
00:59:29
you going to get enough of um an
00:59:31
adrenaline kick out of um yeah coaching
00:59:33
people and then seeing them you know
00:59:35
smash their goals or see them at the
00:59:36
finish line is that going to be enough
00:59:37
of an adrenaline kick for you yeah yeah
00:59:39
I'll need to find my own Outlet as well
00:59:41
yeah so in in on top of obviously the
00:59:44
coaching I'm going to need I'm going to
00:59:45
need my own thing whatever that is and I
00:59:47
haven't worked out what that is yet I uh
00:59:49
I don't know whether I'm going to try
00:59:50
wheelchair rugby or you know recumbent
00:59:53
Cycles or um you know I'm going to need
00:59:55
some sort of you know physical Outlet to
00:59:57
do
01:00:03
the sense of movement and adventure and
01:00:05
I think you know like in this situation
01:00:08
he can still have that and I think I
01:00:10
made the physios and doctor's eyes
01:00:13
Boggle and I think Kerry's always been
01:00:15
an athlete I expect that to continue
01:00:16
because I'm kind of like oh well you
01:00:19
know that it's true like I expect that
01:00:21
he'll find a way to to still be out
01:00:24
there moving and to be engaging with
01:00:27
nature it will be in a different way to
01:00:30
what it was
01:00:31
um mountain tops will be a bit harder
01:00:33
now but
01:00:35
um I still think that yeah whether it's
01:00:37
you know adapted kayaking or adapted
01:00:40
biking or something like that maybe
01:00:42
learning to swim again we'll see we'll
01:00:45
find out but I don't doubt for a second
01:00:47
that he's just gonna sit there doing
01:00:49
that thing yeah oh I I fully fully agree
01:00:52
it's just not you no I've just got to
01:00:55
find a way it's good it's kind of been a
01:00:57
hard time watching the muscle atrophy as
01:00:58
well you know like going through this
01:01:00
process just seeing you know leads to
01:01:02
work for 20 years just sort of slowly
01:01:03
melt away and uh has that happened
01:01:05
already oh God yeah absolutely yeah it's
01:01:08
very fast so three months oh easily gone
01:01:11
well and truly gone in that time so
01:01:13
about I've gone down about what is it 10
01:01:15
of my body weight again and um I thought
01:01:18
this might be a might be I don't know if
01:01:19
this is a dumb question or a sensitive
01:01:21
question but um when you dream are you
01:01:23
are you still able right questions this
01:01:26
is a great question so I I still dream
01:01:28
that I can walk but I know that I'm you
01:01:33
know know that I'm not a walker so in
01:01:35
the dream of it you know like I'll get
01:01:36
up and walk around the place and it was
01:01:38
like that's so great you're walking and
01:01:39
I'm like yeah I really shouldn't be
01:01:40
because I'm disabled um so I still dream
01:01:42
in Walking which is kind of weird but I
01:01:44
know it's uh I know I shouldn't yeah
01:01:46
that was quite a weird thing for me oh
01:01:48
God you're gonna make me cry um was like
01:01:51
going when does it change because like
01:01:54
in my dreams he was moving and then I
01:01:56
think maybe a couple weeks then I had a
01:01:58
dream that he was like lying in a bed
01:02:00
and he couldn't go into a room because
01:02:02
of the covert risk so he was outside on
01:02:04
this bed with a mask and I was like oh
01:02:06
this is maybe this is the start of me
01:02:08
accepting this situation and now I think
01:02:12
he is I don't know what he is in my
01:02:15
dreams now I think it is you know his
01:02:18
disability is there but it did like
01:02:20
there was some quite confronting dreams
01:02:22
that you'd wake up from and just be like
01:02:24
brutal
01:02:25
are you both such an amazing couple
01:02:28
you really are I'm so pleased you've got
01:02:29
each other yeah you've got me crying
01:02:33
yeah yeah
01:02:35
that's a [ __ ] thing you're going through
01:02:36
but you know
01:02:39
if anyone can handle it I reckon you can
01:02:40
mate yeah
01:02:42
yeah it's always
01:02:48
just word you say you say you couldn't
01:02:50
handle it but I suppose if you're in
01:02:51
that situation it's like well there's
01:02:54
two options hey just handle it or take
01:02:55
the other way out yeah
01:02:57
I have a lot to come to terms I've lost
01:02:59
Decades of my life
01:03:01
now
01:03:02
I'm connected baby
01:03:04
how old would that baby be
01:03:06
when I'm not
01:03:16
I don't know what to say
01:03:20
I suppose you just make as much of an
01:03:22
impact while you while you can
01:03:25
and um and I know I know you will
01:03:28
but you can be an incredible dad
01:03:30
all right like however many years here
01:03:33
it's you know and uh
01:03:39
that's going right you know like nothing
01:03:42
is guaranteed we've found that out the
01:03:44
hard way is that you know you think you
01:03:46
have your life planned out and it's it's
01:03:48
not you can get through on a massive
01:03:50
curveball so it's just going you know
01:03:53
that old cliche of taking it as it comes
01:03:56
and making the most of it and and
01:03:58
bringing that love and laughter to your
01:04:01
days and that focus and purpose and
01:04:03
passion as well because that's what
01:04:04
we've got in Leaps and Bounds and that's
01:04:07
what we have filled our days with and
01:04:10
we'll continue to fill our days with
01:04:11
just
01:04:13
um yeah kind of writing out the storm is
01:04:15
because
01:04:16
Well mine's an injury that moves me back
01:04:18
towards life
01:04:19
that's true yeah and if things things
01:04:21
were different yeah you may have never
01:04:23
got to meet your daughter
01:04:24
that's right yeah well I'm hoping it's a
01:04:27
standoff oh really yeah
01:04:33
which I love very much how many how old
01:04:36
are you girls 10 and 12 yeah and they're
01:04:38
great kids they are um a very you know
01:04:40
smart and loving and caring and uh you
01:04:44
know they're going through this as well
01:04:45
this is hard for them
01:04:47
they've been up a few times a visit and
01:04:50
see them and spend time in
01:04:52
time and they're a big focus on my
01:04:53
future as well and uh how can I continue
01:04:56
to you know be their dad as well nothing
01:04:58
changes there I think if you're a father
01:04:59
you just want to you just want to Dad as
01:05:01
hard as you can I'll have a lot of time
01:05:03
to throw up being a dad which is yeah
01:05:06
well you're um you're you're a fully
01:05:08
sent guy it's just how you've lived your
01:05:10
life and uh
01:05:11
obviously it didn't always work out for
01:05:14
the best but I'm sure that's um that's
01:05:16
how you parent as well and um yeah your
01:05:18
girls are likely to have you and uh the
01:05:19
The Unborn one as well that's on the way
01:05:21
when's the due date 12th of October 4th
01:05:24
of October yeah listen however many
01:05:26
years you've got left here and hopefully
01:05:28
it's hopefully it's plenty
01:05:30
um I'm sure you're going to make a real
01:05:31
impact on um on that baby's life
01:05:34
and help other people I'm more than I
01:05:37
love doing it yeah well you already have
01:05:39
and you will continue to do so I'm sure
01:05:42
yeah Squadron um well yeah what's the
01:05:44
website squadron.com NZ or if you're in
01:05:47
Australia at squad.run hey what's been
01:05:49
um fabulous sitting down with you guys
01:05:50
today where are we again Ellie what's
01:05:52
the thing it's got a long name
01:05:55
final Rehabilitation Unit yeah yeah
01:05:57
would not recommend visiting
01:06:00
Tuesdays great people
01:06:03
service
01:06:04
don't do it
01:06:06
okay yeah yeah spinal injuries that uh
01:06:10
what would I say assess the risk would
01:06:12
be now the uh the emo there's uh you
01:06:15
think about think about
01:06:16
think of what you're doing
01:06:19
rummage around your bum every morning
01:06:21
try and avoid that at all costs
01:06:24
I've got some I've seen some porn where
01:06:26
people pay big money for that that's why
01:06:28
I can't understand people do this
01:06:29
recreationally I don't I was so
01:06:31
disappointed when we got to Ed at
01:06:34
middlemore and um the nurse there was
01:06:38
like okay I'm Gonna Roll them over I'm
01:06:39
gonna roll you over and put my finger in
01:06:41
your bum hole and I'm like oh I haven't
01:06:43
even been allowed to do that and now
01:06:45
you're just living every Tom Dick and
01:06:47
Harry bloody thing
01:06:49
not a day just the time in the house
01:06:51
yeah yeah
01:06:52
yeah
01:06:54
all right I think that's a good note to
01:06:56
end it on yeah
01:06:58
all right I am thank you so much for
01:07:00
your time today guys and um best of luck
01:07:02
for whatever the future may bring
01:07:04
thanks Tom