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Matthew Ridge shares awkward story about how he met his wife | Runners Only! Podcast with Dom Harvey

October 25, 2022 / 01:42:23

This episode features Matthew Ridge, a prominent New Zealand sports figure, discussing his career in rugby and television, mental health, and personal growth.

Matthew Ridge, known as Reggie, shares his journey from being a junior tennis champion to becoming an All Black and a successful rugby league player. He reflects on the pressures of being a high-paid athlete and the impact of media scrutiny on mental health.

Ridge discusses his decision to step back from the public eye for his mental well-being and how he navigated challenges in his personal life, including his relationships and parenting. He emphasizes the importance of honesty and vulnerability in relationships.

The conversation touches on Ridge's experiences with fame, the challenges of being in the spotlight, and his views on societal judgments. He also shares insights on parenting and the lessons learned from his past.

Overall, the episode offers a candid look at Matthew Ridge's life, his reflections on personal growth, and the importance of mental health.

TL;DR

Matthew Ridge discusses his sports career, mental health, and personal growth in this candid conversation.

Episode

1:42:23

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g'day and welcome to Runners only with

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dom Harvey on this episode Matthew Ridge

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you know I came for the money I I didn't

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what was the money yeah it was around

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three quarters of a million back then

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which was heaps that was 95 96 97 98 you

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know my teammates are like the guys on

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five times as much as I am I'm playing

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better than he is and you know and then

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you know the papers were doing you know

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I was getting paid so much a minute

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Matthew Ridge better known to most new

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zealanders as Reggie is one of New

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Zealand's most talented Sports people

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ever he was a junior tennis champ

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briefly he was an all black then he went

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on to become one of the best and highest

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paid rugby league stars in the world

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then after sport he launched a very

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successful TV career on his own and as

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part of a comedy duo with Mark Ellis

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what can you say about Reggie he really

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is one of those guys whose reputation

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precedes him so I'm really excited to

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share this conversation with you guys

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and hear what you think maybe it'll

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change your opinion on Matthew maybe it

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won't either way the dude seems pretty

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comfortable in his own skin these days

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so I don't think he'll be faced too much

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either way all right let's get into it

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hope you enjoy it Matthew Ridge

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[Music]

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this is

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[Music]

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fast paced slow and steady anyway you

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coming just wanna connect for everyone

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who loves running hey Runners only with

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dime Harley

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red is only with Don Harvey and Matthew

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Reggie Rich g'day mate hey mate how are

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you doing yeah good good nice and close

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nice and close to that thing wow here we

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are sitting in my uh my new podcast

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Lounge yes it's um

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oh it's a little Lounge

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oh no it's it's me yeah I I first of all

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thanks for coming over I really

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appreciate it good when I when I reached

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out to you I thought uh slim chance at

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best because you you are even though

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you're a public guy you're also quite a

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quite a private guy you don't hear a lot

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about what you get up to these days yeah

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I've

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um I've sort of deliberately done that I

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guess with playing Sport and and then

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being involved in the media and doing

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television and that sort of stuff

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um when

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I use them in social media and all that

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sort of stuff came along

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I I just decided to take a deep dive and

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just you know like just stay out of the

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media and keep my head down and

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um and you know that was really good for

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my you know it's everybody talks about

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their mental health but it was really

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good for my mental health you know

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because you when you're I guess a public

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figure to a lesser extent but um you've

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always got to have your Shield up you

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know and because if you don't have your

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Shield up people especially in New

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Zealand or pretty much everywhere should

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everybody likes to take a pot shot you

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know so you're always you're always well

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armed and I I you know you you never get

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to you know to relax and um and you know

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when I had children I just decided look

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I just didn't want to be I didn't want

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to do that anymore I'm pleased that um

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you've brought up the mental health

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thing so early because it is a a fairly

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big focus on this podcast and I wanted

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to pick your brains about that because

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um [ __ ] we're getting we're going deep

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we're going straight into it yeah yeah

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because you've always struck me as being

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a a total I don't give a [ __ ] kind of

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guy yeah but stuff still must hurt when

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you get caught riding around like

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shitless on a BMX and you're

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relentlessly trolled or bullied I guess

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you could even say anything in the media

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yeah you've got a hard [ __ ] time and

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you seem not care but I'm sure you do I

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you know anybody that says that you

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don't care about what people think about

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you is probably not being entirely

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truthful but I I was

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armed by my grandmother when I was young

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and she was used to say to me never

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worry about day there's a collection of

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he she's of some butts and she used to

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drill that into me and Matthew always

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laughed loudest at yourself and you know

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when you

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when you think like that it's it's easy

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to put an armor up and you can it's you

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know like you can let it's people kind

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of offend you or whatever and you can it

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doesn't affect you but it does you know

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so

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um you know you wear that shield and all

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that sort of stuff and I I wore a shield

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for a long long time when people saying

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you know they're negative or whatever

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anybody that says it it doesn't hurt

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them is not being entirely treatable but

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I I like to think that

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I don't really care about other people's

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opinions you know as long as I'm being

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respectful as long as I've behaved

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myself I haven't stepped over the line I

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haven't done anything wrong I haven't

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been

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um you know I just haven't been a good

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human being then I've got nothing to

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worry about you know like not

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everybody's going to like you Don you

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know um and that's the truth yeah yeah

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and the thing is is this is the thing

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that used to make me laugh is like you

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know when you're playing Sport and you

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you know when you're out in the arena

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you're an entirely different person to

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the person you are off the field right

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so if you're a combative aggressive

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person when you're playing sport it

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doesn't necessarily mean you're a

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combative aggressive person off the

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field you're just competitive good at

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your job yeah and um you know like uh I

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was just competitive I wasn't

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particularly big strong fast but I was a

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competitor and and you know I'd get in

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people's faces and that's what I did and

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but away from the field I was a

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completely different person I'm not

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saying I was an angel but you know I'm

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not up in everybody's face sort of thing

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and

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um that was the thing for me I guess was

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you know like

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you do television shows and you send

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yourself up you make a bit of a joke of

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yourself you know you you carry on like

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a pork chop but you're making a TV show

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you know like that's what it is it's

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like so if you if you're not prepared to

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take the Mickey out of yourself or to

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push the boundaries or whatever like

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it's going to be real boring television

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show right you know so you you can't

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always be trying to you know

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um have this image that hey I've got

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this image to create I had no problem in

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playing the bad guy or playing this guy

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or whatever anybody wanted me to do as

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long as if if it was going to rate or

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make good television or be a benefit to

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what we were trying to do then I was all

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for it but that doesn't mean you're that

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person it's a character it's a character

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100 is a character and a lot of people

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don't get there so they see you on TV

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and they go I don't like that guy

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you just don't get it you know it's like

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you know you see the guys on movies or

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TV shows and you meet them and they're

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completely different right so you know

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you and and the other thing you used to

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really tease me off a lot about people

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in general actually is is people tend to

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form an opinion about somebody before

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they've even met them and that is just a

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big No-No you know you can't judge

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somebody unless admit them and even if

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when you've met them you shouldn't be

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judging people because you know who are

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you to judge you know like everybody's

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got their own story and their own trials

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and their own tribulations and and all

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that sort of stuff so you know I think

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that you know we're real good at judging

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people and and um and fast to do it as

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well real fast you know it's like you

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know like a few if you've never done

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anything wrong in your life or you're

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perfect and yeah go for it but you know

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everybody makes mistakes

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um

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I've made Millions you know there's lots

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of things that I wish I hadn't have done

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or if I could now if I could speak to

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the young man back there and say hey you

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don't need to say that or you didn't

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need to do that or you didn't need to

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you know behave like this or whatever

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but you know that's

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as you get older these are the things

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you learn you know you just you get a

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little bit wiser you don't try and have

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those you know like confrontations with

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somebody just because you feel like your

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point of view is

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you know more important or you're right

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and they're wrong you know like I just

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yeah I think I think the The Edge as

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soften as you get older as well don't

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they and you learn yeah yeah I think so

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but yeah oh definitely you know if you

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don't learn then yeah yeah

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um but it seems like there's um there's

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people that don't know you that they

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will be like um oh Matthew Ridge he's

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arrogant or he's cocky or he's a tosser

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yeah and then you speak to anybody that

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knows you well I'm thinking of the

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people that I know personally that know

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you and yeah they'll they'll just go

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he's the most loyal yeah and honest

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person you'll ever meet and he's there

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for you one thousand percent yep that's

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probably you know like it's pretty good

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summation you know like if if you cross

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me then you're done but um you know like

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I will I've got a big heart and I I care

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about people and you know I try and

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you know I'm part the wisdom that I've

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learned as you know from from growing up

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I try to spend you know if people want

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to talk to me I started to spend time

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with them if um people need help I try

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to help them I mean one thing that

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Springs to mind for me is when um uh

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your old um teammate and for

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interviewers um Brent Todd he got in

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trouble got some fraud thing for ripping

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off the poking machines or whatever he's

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on home detention yeah and uh you you

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had him at your house yeah which uh it

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was a lovely gesture

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yeah but you know like you know let's

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talk about that they're fraud thing you

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know like every just about every every

00:09:08

Publican or everybody that's got Pokey

00:09:10

machines is getting a kickback so you

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know you get a kick back one way or the

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other and sure it might be illegal but

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that's just how it is you know so so if

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I want some money from a pokey guy he

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goes hey look can you give me this and

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just give me a little bit back and I'm

00:09:25

like oh okay cool that just happened

00:09:27

there were heaps of guys that were doing

00:09:28

it I won't name names but there were

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heaps the guys that were doing it and

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toddy was just a poor guy right and he

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put his hand up and and he got his you

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know it was really hard for Brent

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because he's got a massive heart and he

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really cares about what other people

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have thought of him everybody loved him

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right and then so all of a sudden you

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know Brent Todd's frauds to do you know

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like and his best mates Matthew Ridge

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who's an absolute [ __ ] right so so

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you know like you know that they're made

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for one another but you know I can

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remember when Tony came into my house

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and uh he was broken you know his head

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was down and I said hey maybe leave here

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in 12 months time you're going to walk

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out here with the edel diet and and he

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did you know like but he knuckled down

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he came and worked for me you know he

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lived at home for 12 months he could

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come to work and then he'd have to go

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home and you know there wasn't a cross

00:10:14

we didn't say crossword in 12 months you

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know it was it was a real privilege to

00:10:18

have him in my house what was that like

00:10:20

basically becoming flatmates again yeah

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growing ass man yeah it was it was

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actually really cool like it was you

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know like he he like I say he he was

00:10:28

broken you know like he'd gone through a

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lot he'd gone from being at the top of

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the pile to the bottom of the pole and

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that's that's not easy when you're at

00:10:35

the top of the pole and then all of a

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sudden you're at the bottom of the pole

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and everybody loves to kick you and

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you're down you know and my people were

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laying into them right and you know

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there are a lot of people that I was

00:10:45

pretty upset with who um you know should

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have been there for him but putting the

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boot into him you know so I think I saw

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this on a Lance Armstrong documentary he

00:10:53

said when the [ __ ] hits the fan there's

00:10:54

two sorts of people those that sort of

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lean in and those that sort of lean out

00:10:57

yeah and it's a great way to find out

00:10:59

who your realm is yeah yeah there's not

00:11:00

many people leaning didn't know [ __ ] man

00:11:02

there's so much to unpack with you first

00:11:04

of all I want to I want to say um like I

00:11:07

feel like everywhere you go in New

00:11:08

Zealand people call you Reggie you must

00:11:10

hear Reggie being yelled yeah yeah um

00:11:12

but when we were texting backwards and

00:11:13

forwards you used Matthew yeah does

00:11:16

Reggie feel like a character like the TV

00:11:18

character yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

00:11:20

Reggie or regular you know a lot of

00:11:23

people call me reg and that you know

00:11:24

like I think calling someone by their

00:11:26

second name

00:11:28

it reminds me of being at school and you

00:11:31

know like it's it's a little bit

00:11:32

disrespectful I think you know like I

00:11:34

don't go around calling Hey Harvey or

00:11:36

you know like you're yeah it's very

00:11:38

scholar it's just it's just weird you

00:11:40

know so you know you're born with a

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first name and so I I like to use my

00:11:45

first name

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um you know I'm not well I don't worry

00:11:48

if people can't be Reggie but if someone

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calls me Ridge I'm like yeah yeah good

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one you know it's just say right I just

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don't like it it's just like for me it's

00:11:58

just it sounds like you're you're really

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wanting to have a go at me you know hey

00:12:03

Ridge it's like are you

00:12:06

there he is is that right you know like

00:12:09

so yeah like I still wouldn't want to

00:12:11

[ __ ] with you hey like you've meled a

00:12:13

lot but even then yeah I'm not a fighter

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or anything I've never never have been

00:12:18

but I've got a sharp tongue you know and

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you've got a look that you can do and I

00:12:21

can normally I can normally get under

00:12:23

people's skin pretty quickly it's a

00:12:25

skill that I have and I can find it I

00:12:27

can find their weakness real quick yeah

00:12:29

okay so um yeah let's go uh right back

00:12:32

so um you're born in Rotorua did you get

00:12:34

mistaken for being Maori a lot yes I did

00:12:36

get mistaken for being Maori and and

00:12:39

that that wasn't an issue you know like

00:12:41

I had no problem with that but I was a

00:12:43

proud you know my mother always kept my

00:12:46

my Heritage at the Forefront of my

00:12:49

learnings I guess as I was growing up so

00:12:50

I was very proud Armenian even though

00:12:52

nobody knew where Armenia was and you

00:12:54

know all that sort of stuff so you know

00:12:56

but I I didn't have an issue with being

00:12:58

Molly or anything like that and I was

00:12:59

you know as you say I was born in

00:13:00

Rotorua my mum lived down there we live

00:13:03

with the family and

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um luckily enough for us was my

00:13:07

grandmother convinced my grandfather to

00:13:09

drive down and and pick us up when I was

00:13:12

about one and my grandfather was a he

00:13:15

was a real cool dude but came from a

00:13:17

time where you know he was English and

00:13:20

and people were more racist then than

00:13:22

they are now you know so so he for him

00:13:25

to come and pick me up

00:13:27

um with my grandmother was a big thing

00:13:29

because I I was I was very dark so you

00:13:32

know like it wasn't something and back

00:13:34

in those days you know you got married

00:13:36

before you had children all that sort of

00:13:38

stuff so it was it was a very foreign

00:13:39

thing for my for my grandfather but

00:13:41

luckily they they they came down and got

00:13:44

me because they raised me and I would be

00:13:46

a very different person of

00:13:48

um you know my mum was obviously you

00:13:50

know in my life but my grandparents were

00:13:51

in my life 24 7. yeah and you and you

00:13:54

you started playing uh you gravitated

00:13:55

towards tennis and you were bloody good

00:13:57

I was speaking to a guy who I wish I

00:13:59

could remember his name I met him at a

00:14:00

function a few weeks ago and he said he

00:14:01

played with you and you were like real

00:14:03

good like uh like as good as let's say

00:14:06

Britt Stevens Chris Lewis Kelly givendon

00:14:08

like oh you could play like I've played

00:14:10

against bread four or five times and I

00:14:11

beat him a couple of times I think he'd

00:14:13

be more than I beat him but but um yeah

00:14:15

the last time we we played was probably

00:14:17

when we were 15 or 16 so but yeah I was

00:14:20

yeah I was a good tennis player but back

00:14:22

in those days um

00:14:24

I I felt like tennis was very if you

00:14:27

weren't the right color

00:14:29

and you didn't have the right upbringing

00:14:31

then tennis wasn't going to be a sport

00:14:33

in New Zealand you know it was it was

00:14:35

and especially if you I I was I was

00:14:37

aggressive I was you know I wanted to

00:14:39

win I I issues keeping my um temper

00:14:42

under control so

00:14:44

what but I never had we let everyone

00:14:48

like yeah yeah John Mcenroe is yeah I

00:14:51

was definitely like those guys but but

00:14:53

um

00:14:54

but yeah but we we had nobody we had no

00:14:57

one to you know like it's the thing

00:14:59

about young athletes is if you get

00:15:01

somebody who identifies that you're a

00:15:05

talent and they can arm you with the

00:15:09

right tools I would have been sweet but

00:15:11

I wasn't armed with the right tools so

00:15:13

so everybody told me you can't do that

00:15:15

instead of saying hey why don't you

00:15:17

Channel your energy like this and you

00:15:21

know like I can see you really care so

00:15:23

much about winning and stuff but you

00:15:25

know you don't need to let your

00:15:26

opposition know how pissed off you are

00:15:28

because as soon as you take it as soon

00:15:30

as your mentality goes especially in

00:15:32

tennis as soon as you start losing your

00:15:35

head it's all over right you're beating

00:15:37

right so so but I had nobody to tell me

00:15:39

so hey instead of getting so frustrated

00:15:41

why don't you just try and channel that

00:15:43

frustration into the next point you know

00:15:46

and things like that so like if I could

00:15:49

speak to that guy now you know that

00:15:51

young boy now of with the stuff that I

00:15:53

know now like I I probably would have

00:15:56

played tennis or played soccer or

00:15:58

whatever you know I definitely want to

00:15:59

play rugby or rugby league because you

00:16:01

were quite a late starter right like you

00:16:02

didn't play context sport until like 15.

00:16:05

I played soccer I was I was a I was a

00:16:08

good soccer player and and that's what

00:16:09

made me a good rugby player and a good

00:16:12

lead player because it gave me the

00:16:13

ability to you know soccer's about

00:16:15

reading play and all that sort of stuff

00:16:17

and I had

00:16:18

um Vision

00:16:20

um which enabled me to be in the right

00:16:21

place at the right time so if I you

00:16:23

didn't have the pace or the power but if

00:16:25

you had the vision the ability to read

00:16:26

the game then you ended up being the

00:16:28

right spot and that's that's pretty much

00:16:29

what I had so but um yeah I if if I was

00:16:34

born in Europe I definitely wouldn't

00:16:37

have been a rugby player or or a lead

00:16:40

player I would have been a soccer player

00:16:42

or a tennis player 100 yeah so you know

00:16:45

that's and it kind of like I don't have

00:16:47

any regrets but I kind of do I I think I

00:16:50

I went the wrong way I said what do you

00:16:53

mean how so I should this I should I I

00:16:55

definitely much better soccer player

00:16:57

than I was a rugby player you know

00:17:00

um but you know but my decision back

00:17:03

then was I wanted to be a professional

00:17:04

athlete and there were no Avenue so

00:17:06

there was no pathway for soccer players

00:17:08

in you know so you know if I become an

00:17:10

all black then I'll get a good job you

00:17:12

know that that was my thinking so I sort

00:17:15

of stopped playing tennis and stopped

00:17:16

playing soccer and have you tried any

00:17:18

sports that you sucked at it seems like

00:17:20

you just naturally good at whatever you

00:17:24

well I'm not good at Water Sports you

00:17:26

know like I I can't surf or anything

00:17:28

like that yeah I wasn't a great swimmer

00:17:30

I I was good at primary school and stuff

00:17:32

but yeah I think Ball Sports and all

00:17:35

that sort of stuff I just had good hand

00:17:36

eyes so yeah so you made the um you made

00:17:38

the uh the all black Squad to tour

00:17:40

Britain in uh like 1989

00:17:42

1989. how old were you then what were

00:17:45

you then uh so I just turned 21 I think

00:17:47

right yeah actually you'd only been

00:17:48

playing like rugby six years and yeah I

00:17:50

I mean we're playing at school and stuff

00:17:52

so seven eight years probably yeah I

00:17:54

played a primary school you know making

00:17:56

a round button not not seriously you

00:17:58

know but um you know you just play on

00:18:00

The Paddock and that sort of stuff but I

00:18:01

hadn't played Club rugby or anything and

00:18:03

yeah and then made the All Blacks it

00:18:05

feels like an absolute lifetime ago you

00:18:07

know it is it's over it's well over half

00:18:09

your life ago yeah yeah but it's it's

00:18:11

you know the things you remember and the

00:18:14

feelings that you have the people that

00:18:16

you meet the teammates that I played

00:18:18

with and you know you know it was it was

00:18:20

a pretty special time in my life to you

00:18:22

know to make the old base now the old

00:18:24

base now is you know real cool but back

00:18:25

in those days being an all black was a

00:18:28

bill and end-all you know like it's

00:18:29

there was nothing else there wasn't

00:18:31

rugby league or there was rugby Lee but

00:18:32

not really and you know there was soccer

00:18:34

but it wasn't really like it was the

00:18:37

number one sport by a lion a wild right

00:18:39

so to be to be an all black was you know

00:18:41

every kid's dream right so and you know

00:18:44

we were schools were geared to rugby

00:18:46

everything was geared to rugby so to

00:18:47

have that opportunity and to you know to

00:18:49

make the all base with you know some of

00:18:51

my you know schoolmates and and

00:18:53

clubmates was was pretty amazing yeah

00:18:55

have you are you much of a memorabilia

00:18:57

guy like do you have any of them where's

00:18:59

all the gear going no no I don't have

00:19:01

any I have I've got a you know I pretty

00:19:03

much give well did you only get one you

00:19:04

didn't get one because you played you

00:19:06

didn't play anything yeah I think yeah I

00:19:08

think you get a couple of jerseys but

00:19:10

the first jersey that you play play and

00:19:12

you you get I think I might have got a

00:19:14

couple but I gave one to so moderate she

00:19:17

was he was a guy that got me into soccer

00:19:18

I'm a book collection I found your book

00:19:21

um take no prisoners which um it's uh

00:19:23

it's like a time capsule how was that

00:19:25

how was that now like 30 something I

00:19:26

don't know like um it came out like

00:19:28

about the two things in the 90s 90 95 96

00:19:32

I think yeah

00:19:33

um

00:19:34

yeah and that was that yeah it was

00:19:36

it was an interesting book there because

00:19:38

I was um you know in a pretty rough

00:19:41

place

00:19:42

um I'd come back I was playing for the

00:19:44

Warriors

00:19:45

I was the highest paid player like

00:19:48

definitely in the worries but in the top

00:19:49

two or three in the game you know I'd

00:19:51

come back to a club off a high of

00:19:54

winning a Premiership and that sort of

00:19:55

stuff and then into an outfit that was

00:19:57

pretty average to be honest

00:20:00

um you know off the phone A lot's

00:20:01

changed since then yeah

00:20:04

um but but I I guess I knew what I was

00:20:05

coming back into you know I came for the

00:20:07

money I I didn't what was the money yeah

00:20:09

it was around three quarters of a

00:20:11

million back then was which was heaps so

00:20:13

which would be so how many years ago are

00:20:15

we talking what's that was 95 96 97 98

00:20:19

95 so that'd be uh that's the equivalent

00:20:21

to say two and a half million a year

00:20:23

yeah it was big money it was a big money

00:20:24

and then you know

00:20:26

yeah then what came with it was you know

00:20:28

like all the drama that came with it so

00:20:31

you know I put a lot of pressure on

00:20:33

myself to play well and you know I

00:20:35

started copping injuries and that sort

00:20:36

of stuff and then The Treasure of the

00:20:38

club or the guy that you know pretty

00:20:39

much ran the books he leaked my wage to

00:20:42

the uh to the media and all that sort of

00:20:44

stuff and then you know I had issues

00:20:46

with you know my teammates are like the

00:20:49

guys on five times as much as I am I'm

00:20:51

playing better than he is and you know I

00:20:53

was it was just an absolute night it's

00:20:56

not great for morale is it no it's just

00:20:58

it was so bad you know like I was and

00:21:01

and in those days you you went to talk

00:21:03

about what you made so for this guy to

00:21:06

leak this out and then you know the

00:21:08

papers were doing you know I was getting

00:21:10

paid so much a minute and it was it was

00:21:13

it was a really mean I was a real shitty

00:21:17

time mate like it was just you know like

00:21:19

and you could see you know like

00:21:21

the players you know some of them really

00:21:24

had an issue with it you know and it's

00:21:26

not it's not conducive to being you know

00:21:28

to to playing well as a team you know if

00:21:30

one guy's getting paid [ __ ] loads more

00:21:32

than everybody else then you know

00:21:34

there's jealousy and there's envy and

00:21:36

there's all those sorts of things and

00:21:37

you know then you're not playing well

00:21:39

and then you're putting pressure on

00:21:40

yourself to play where you're coming

00:21:41

back and trying to play when you're

00:21:42

injured and I was playing with some

00:21:44

serious injuries you know I wasn't

00:21:46

making any excuses for it but and

00:21:49

playing in a team that really had no

00:21:51

backbone and you know like you know I

00:21:55

was one part of a very successful team

00:21:57

at manly you know they they talk about

00:21:59

the spine but we didn't have a spine we

00:22:02

were you know like we were just pretty

00:22:03

average across the park and um even

00:22:06

though individually we were good we just

00:22:08

didn't have the mentality you know and

00:22:10

nothing's changed the mentality in sport

00:22:12

is the most important thing is your

00:22:14

mental toughness and your ability to to

00:22:17

bounce back and to you know to hang in

00:22:19

the dog fight and all that sort of stuff

00:22:20

the Warriors they've never had it or

00:22:23

they had maybe 2001 2002 2003 they had

00:22:27

it for a bit when Cleary was you know

00:22:29

when he was coaching but

00:22:31

it's just not there and I don't think it

00:22:33

ever will be yeah it's just just jinxed

00:22:36

I don't know if it's Jinx I just think

00:22:38

like well now you just need to clean

00:22:39

that place out it's just it's now it's

00:22:41

just a joke you know like and you know I

00:22:44

I don't think the players are honest

00:22:46

enough with each other you know like I

00:22:48

you know like I actually I've read

00:22:50

something in a paper the other day that

00:22:52

that is starting to give you give it to

00:22:54

each other on the field well well maybe

00:22:55

they should you know like you need to

00:22:57

have an honest conversation with guys

00:22:59

because you know you need to say hey

00:23:00

mate you're not making your tackles

00:23:02

you're playing like a deck you know you

00:23:04

shouldn't be up here you know like

00:23:05

that's the thing you know like you win a

00:23:07

Premiership on defense it's not hard to

00:23:09

tackle it's just commitment it's just

00:23:11

mind over matter and putting your body

00:23:13

on the line right and just getting your

00:23:15

getting your your team to do the same

00:23:17

thing right and and that's what we

00:23:19

always had we always had problems with

00:23:20

you know like guys on the team always

00:23:22

have weaknesses and and players with

00:23:24

other teams would work it out and they

00:23:25

just attack those weaknesses and if your

00:23:28

defensive line is weak and the Warriors

00:23:30

have always had a pretty weak defensive

00:23:31

line except

00:23:33

2002 2003 you know like when they've

00:23:36

made those runs they've been brutal

00:23:39

right but the consistency is just not

00:23:41

there so

00:23:43

um it wasn't a fun time well and I I

00:23:45

can't imagine so

00:23:46

um yeah you brought that up because I

00:23:48

mentioned mentioned the book but we're

00:23:50

skipping all the all the good stuff the

00:23:51

glory years the the almost the decade

00:23:54

that you had at manly so so there's a

00:23:56

guy called John Gallagher who's um who's

00:23:58

playing for the All Blacks yeah

00:24:00

ginger-headed dude yeah let the staff

00:24:02

fall back so you're like I don't have a

00:24:03

chance yeah making the team did you want

00:24:07

to lift anywhere like I wasn't like I

00:24:08

didn't have a chance of making the team

00:24:09

I was real close to I was real close on

00:24:12

that tour to

00:24:13

um nudging him out I can remember that

00:24:15

um he was

00:24:17

we were playing I made the subs against

00:24:21

Ireland so I was on the bench against

00:24:23

Ireland and Kevin got an injury and I

00:24:25

was like come on and like he looked over

00:24:28

and there was no way he was going to get

00:24:30

that opportunity like so he he just

00:24:32

gassed it out but um

00:24:34

but um you know just to get on the bench

00:24:36

back and though see they're like to get

00:24:38

a test back in those days to get on the

00:24:39

bench was hard right and then in those

00:24:41

days you didn't get onto the field

00:24:43

unless somebody was injured so there was

00:24:45

no interchange you just sat there you

00:24:48

know like you got on the bench and you

00:24:49

hoped that someone got injured because

00:24:50

the 15 players would pretty much just

00:24:52

played through whereas now you make the

00:24:54

side you're guaranteed a you know a

00:24:56

run-on yeah

00:24:58

even if they're not you know just so

00:25:01

they wheel out the subscribe so it's

00:25:04

like like it's it's not I won't say it's

00:25:07

easy to get a camp now but back in those

00:25:09

days it was just harder to get a cap you

00:25:10

know so you had to hang around and well

00:25:12

yeah you just have to look at the

00:25:13

numbers now like how many how many years

00:25:15

over 100 caps yeah yeah yeah exactly so

00:25:18

um I was gonna say so rugby was amateur

00:25:21

so there was no money there's no money

00:25:22

right so was money so but you you guys

00:25:25

both announced you were leaving rugby to

00:25:27

play league around about the same time

00:25:28

well I didn't know so so I think he left

00:25:30

because he was like [ __ ] no no no he

00:25:32

lived for money like keep away for money

00:25:34

it's the same same reason I did but but

00:25:37

um by the way yeah well see I when I

00:25:40

went to well after the tour I went to

00:25:42

Italy

00:25:43

and I played for a club called peartenza

00:25:45

in the north of Italy and I was there

00:25:47

for a couple of months or maybe just

00:25:49

over two months and I absolutely loved

00:25:51

it I got paid I was getting like 2 000

00:25:53

Lira it was nothing it wasn't maybe

00:25:55

three thousand dollars a month but it

00:25:57

was mean because there was a lot for me

00:25:59

you know and I was living in another

00:26:01

country and just so I had absolute balls

00:26:03

playing you know rugby over there and it

00:26:05

was just cool anyway John Hart rang me

00:26:08

up and said get your you know backside

00:26:10

back here you know you need to get back

00:26:12

home so I came back I reluctantly came

00:26:15

back and I was like

00:26:17

skiona University and then I got home

00:26:19

from uni and I had a message on my

00:26:21

aunt's phone it was Graham Lowe and he

00:26:22

was like hey mate just wondering if

00:26:24

you'd want to come play rugby league I

00:26:26

didn't even think about it like

00:26:28

seriously I I gave it no thought

00:26:30

whatsoever said hell yeah and um so I

00:26:33

rang him up and said yeah mate bloody

00:26:35

oath and he flew over he saw me and he

00:26:38

said oh what do you think you're worth I

00:26:39

said oh I don't know and he just wrote

00:26:41

on this um because I didn't know I

00:26:43

didn't have a [ __ ] clue you didn't

00:26:44

have the balls to say it or no but I

00:26:46

just didn't know right I didn't know

00:26:47

what I was with I had no idea do you

00:26:49

have any idea what other people were

00:26:50

getting no no nothing

00:26:52

um you know we you know we'd heard that

00:26:54

maybe someone was on 100 Grand or 50

00:26:55

Grand I I don't know I can't remember

00:26:57

but but anyway I went and met with them

00:26:59

over at um

00:27:01

are the Panama across the shore

00:27:03

he said oh what do you think you're

00:27:04

worth and I was like um not sure and he

00:27:07

just scribbled down on a serviette and

00:27:09

passed it back over to me it was like 35

00:27:11

Grand and 65 for the second year and I

00:27:14

was and and then he was like and fifteen

00:27:16

hundred dollars a one and I said how

00:27:18

many games are there a year and he got

00:27:19

some there's 20 odd if you make the

00:27:21

semis but so okay if we make it two

00:27:23

grand to win

00:27:24

two grand a draw and uh fifteen hundred

00:27:27

dollars a loss I'm in and he said no you

00:27:29

can't have the loss I said Okay a

00:27:32

thousand bikes loss and it was a

00:27:34

thousand base of loss and I saw and I

00:27:35

happily signed and then when I got over

00:27:37

there I just lost kicking ass I was like

00:27:39

[ __ ] what have I done but um and I

00:27:41

remember storming into his office in

00:27:44

about six weeks saying Graham you've

00:27:48

ripped me off mate and

00:27:50

um because I made the kiwis I've made

00:27:52

the keys after four games so I was

00:27:54

kicking ass were you a bit better than

00:27:56

what you thought you would be or no no I

00:27:58

just no I just I I just I just happen to

00:28:01

be kicking goals and just you know like

00:28:03

I was just doing my job and I'd gone

00:28:05

past your expectations and mine I guess

00:28:07

and I stormed into his office and he

00:28:09

said maybe we've got a contract and you

00:28:11

know we did but to be fair grammar he

00:28:13

organized me a job over there which was

00:28:15

just to pretty much a give me Mrs Hart

00:28:18

um like my eyes arranged so I was

00:28:20

working for line and you know that I was

00:28:23

on a good weekend by the time through

00:28:24

all that stuff and so I didn't really

00:28:26

have much to complain about but yeah um

00:28:28

a hell of a time there with me actually

00:28:29

the time we are um recording this

00:28:31

podcast at some Late July 2022 and the

00:28:35

big news story over the last couple of

00:28:36

days has been about the manly Jersey

00:28:38

um with a rainbow strip on and seven of

00:28:41

the players uh for religious reasons

00:28:43

don't want to play now you play you you

00:28:45

played in uh for manly in the 1990s when

00:28:47

Ian Roberts I think the only openly yeah

00:28:51

League player and a hard bastard as well

00:28:53

was playing and yeah mum's um as well

00:28:56

yeah what are you what are your thoughts

00:28:57

on all this oh look

00:28:59

no not at all I think it's their own you

00:29:02

know like I I think you know everyone's

00:29:04

got their their beliefs and all that

00:29:06

sort of stuff but you know we're all

00:29:08

people in the end so and we can't help

00:29:10

who we are you know so I I've got to say

00:29:13

you know I think the religious aspect I

00:29:15

think you know it's while it might be

00:29:17

wrong religiously to be I I I just I

00:29:20

just I think religions

00:29:22

yeah it causes a lot of yeah we need to

00:29:25

ban religion eh yeah if religion wasn't

00:29:28

around I don't think there'd be as many

00:29:29

issues as we've got you know like I mean

00:29:31

this you know like I I believe in some

00:29:34

sort of higher power but I certainly

00:29:35

don't believe there's a guy out there as

00:29:37

a god he's got a beard and all that sort

00:29:38

of stuff and yeah I believe there was a

00:29:40

Jesus back in the day who was just uh

00:29:42

you know charismatic Tony Robbins yeah

00:29:44

highly Advanced you know human being you

00:29:47

know you know there's all this stuff we

00:29:49

put all these things all these people on

00:29:51

a pedestal and this religion on a

00:29:53

pedestal it's it's a bit of a joke if

00:29:56

you ask me I think you just gotta you

00:29:59

know like there'll be a lot of people

00:30:00

out there that'll go oh you know how can

00:30:01

he say that but you know like

00:30:03

I I think you've just got to use some

00:30:05

common sense and all of this and he

00:30:07

didn't walk on water and all that sort

00:30:08

of stuff you put in faith you know

00:30:10

you've got to have faith I said well

00:30:12

have you show me anybody that can walk

00:30:13

on water

00:30:15

you know is anybody since then walked on

00:30:18

water no you know like is anybody

00:30:21

in Disguise and you know like and as you

00:30:25

know I've risen up to the ever since I'm

00:30:27

like no okay but do I believe in the

00:30:29

universe and do I believe in karma and

00:30:32

yes absolutely you know I I I I

00:30:35

absolutely believe in all that stuff but

00:30:37

do I believe in God

00:30:39

um no I don't know how we got on to that

00:30:41

but yeah so you know so so being gay so

00:30:44

like so hey look if you're gay you're

00:30:47

gay you know like I mean there's there's

00:30:48

no there's no way around it there's

00:30:51

nothing wrong with it you know like

00:30:52

embrace it you know why is it why is it

00:30:55

why is being gay any different to being

00:30:57

straight

00:30:58

there's no difference you know so

00:31:01

I just you know like

00:31:04

life's hard enough as it is just Embrace

00:31:06

everybody you know respect everybody

00:31:08

like you know we're all put on this

00:31:11

Earth

00:31:12

to do something right nobody's better

00:31:14

than anybody else

00:31:16

um I don't care whether you're you're

00:31:17

rich you're poor or whatever you've just

00:31:19

got to treat everybody the same way and

00:31:21

everybody deserves that respect you know

00:31:24

we're there it's a bigger in the street

00:31:25

you know we've all got a story to tell

00:31:27

you know the the coolest scene that I

00:31:30

always find is when you smile at people

00:31:33

and you engage with people you know like

00:31:34

anywhere in the world this happens to be

00:31:36

anywhere in the world where people know

00:31:38

me or don't know me or whatever if you

00:31:40

smile and you engage with people

00:31:42

like it's just so much easier everything

00:31:45

just flows you know if you put out

00:31:47

you're angry or you're aggressive or you

00:31:50

know that's guess what you're going to

00:31:52

get back you're going to get that back

00:31:53

yeah you get what you get you give what

00:31:55

you give so so and you're like it's just

00:31:58

it's so much easier to give people a

00:31:59

smile you know when people are pissed

00:32:00

off or you're going to a shop and then

00:32:03

they rude to you or whatever or like

00:32:05

just let it go you know like we've all

00:32:07

everybody runs around not thinking that

00:32:09

they're special with everybody's you

00:32:11

know like once you get you you go under

00:32:12

control things change like trust me like

00:32:14

if you can get your ego under control

00:32:15

because that's just a phantom thing that

00:32:17

we all have right once you get that

00:32:19

under control nobody can hurt you it's

00:32:21

easy but we teach the wrong stuff in

00:32:24

school we don't arm our children with

00:32:25

the right tools we're all we all think

00:32:28

we're super special and and we are a yes

00:32:30

to a certain extent but hey we're all

00:32:32

the same you know we've all got the same

00:32:34

wants needs we all want to be loved we

00:32:35

want to be careful we all want to be

00:32:37

important but you've got to earn that

00:32:39

right and you know it's not just given

00:32:41

to you on a planet

00:32:42

thank God I wasn't born or raised in

00:32:45

this era with social media and stuff all

00:32:47

right for me that is just the biggest

00:32:49

load of [ __ ] I've ever seen in my life

00:32:51

it's dangerous isn't it it's so bad like

00:32:54

you know there's a reason why I bring

00:32:56

that up let's say so if I was playing

00:32:59

when social media was around I would

00:33:01

have been [ __ ] terrible oh we let us

00:33:04

swear yeah it's a podcast what I mean

00:33:06

bloody awful right um well reading your

00:33:09

book mate like there's so many stories

00:33:11

in there where you think that person

00:33:12

would have been canceled like Jeremy we

00:33:14

would have been nice with the whole all

00:33:16

of us would have been canceled like you

00:33:17

know you're not allowed to do anything

00:33:19

right so there's a story in the uh the

00:33:22

newspaper yesterday about some of the

00:33:23

All Blacks walking through the airport

00:33:24

without masks on and some guy came and

00:33:26

told them off and it's like I'm thinking

00:33:27

the day before this I was reading

00:33:29

reading Matthew's book and he talks

00:33:31

about Jared McCracken throwing a glass

00:33:32

at you and yeah yeah hitting a lady and

00:33:34

yeah yeah Monday thing and one of your

00:33:37

teammates ripping a shirt off a kid oh

00:33:39

man it was just yeah so yeah those days

00:33:41

like social media and something and

00:33:43

there's a reason I don't do it I don't

00:33:46

want anything no because it's a waste of

00:33:48

time you know like honestly I'd rather

00:33:49

be living my life you know I think it's

00:33:50

good to you know some extent you know

00:33:52

you can keep in touch with people all

00:33:53

that sort of stuff but hey keep in touch

00:33:55

by phone or what I I just rather be out

00:33:57

there doing it you know like and you

00:34:00

know all these influences and all that

00:34:01

stuff how are you an influencer like

00:34:03

like it's you know like what have you

00:34:06

actually done like what have you

00:34:07

actually done to like or have you just

00:34:10

created some little thing and you look

00:34:12

real cool or real funny in your bedroom

00:34:14

or whatever I'm like there's just so

00:34:16

much [ __ ] like we just got to get on

00:34:17

with it you know like life's for a

00:34:19

living not like these things like phones

00:34:21

they're awesome ma'am you put your phone

00:34:24

down all your issues disappear I just I

00:34:26

I'm so glad that I am the age I am and

00:34:30

that I am not in that era because I I

00:34:32

just I I feel sorry for you've been like

00:34:35

a father

00:34:36

um several times over over yeah five

00:34:38

times but you've um you've had to like

00:34:40

navigate that I guess with with your

00:34:42

kids now you have young kids and that's

00:34:43

good yeah yeah but you don't like

00:34:45

changing again absolutely but I I think

00:34:47

you have to arm your kids you know you

00:34:48

have to be present when you're with your

00:34:50

children you know and you

00:34:52

you know when you bring children into

00:34:53

the world it's it's a it's a big thing

00:34:55

it's not it's not a joke you know you're

00:34:57

responsible for for a little human being

00:34:59

and and I want to make sure that my

00:35:02

children are you know a balanced loved

00:35:05

they feel kid for a nurtured they you

00:35:09

know and I I think if you if you do

00:35:12

you know

00:35:13

if you do a good job raising your

00:35:15

children then you've you've been a good

00:35:17

human being you know you're putting out

00:35:19

a you know like I'm really proud of all

00:35:22

my kids and it can't be easy being

00:35:25

um you know me being their father you

00:35:27

know it's it's obviously a little bit

00:35:29

different now but for for Jamie and

00:35:30

Boston it would have been hard you know

00:35:32

they're the older two from your first

00:35:34

marriage with Sally how old are they now

00:35:36

so Boston's 25 and Jamie's

00:35:39

28 this month yeah and um and she's just

00:35:42

recently become a mother

00:35:44

become a Granddad yeah so I just I I

00:35:46

went over there and I I met um just we

00:35:48

just came back from last week actually

00:35:50

so he's five months old which was which

00:35:52

was real nice but um it certainly makes

00:35:54

you feel old there's no doubt about it

00:35:56

you know you look like the world's most

00:35:59

buff granddad I'll tell you what no no

00:36:01

no but um anyway so yeah it's been um

00:36:04

it's been an interesting ride on my tea

00:36:06

there but you know oh it's back to

00:36:09

children like that's the most important

00:36:11

thing you'll do in your life without a

00:36:13

doubt you know everything I've ever done

00:36:15

I I I can remember exactly when you know

00:36:19

when my five children were born exactly

00:36:21

how I felt when you know when I saw them

00:36:23

being born you know all their milestones

00:36:25

and all that sort of stuff and and I've

00:36:27

been really lucky enough to be present

00:36:29

in their lives yeah and this this book

00:36:31

of yours which I keep referencing will

00:36:33

take my presence which is like 30 years

00:36:34

old now you talk about um

00:36:36

um actually no there's a documentary I

00:36:38

saw as well there the one you did with

00:36:40

um JK called in a different League yeah

00:36:42

and then that you talk about how you

00:36:44

cried when you when you broke the news

00:36:45

to your black teammates that you were

00:36:46

leaving yeah and then you also cried um

00:36:49

at the birth of um both your kids yeah

00:36:51

created the birth of Jamie yeah and when

00:36:53

Boston came around you're like oh this

00:36:55

isn't my first rodeo yeah by the way

00:36:57

yeah you're emotional again but you you

00:36:58

sit back you said after that you're not

00:37:00

a particularly emotional person you've

00:37:02

got quite a thick skin has that changed

00:37:04

as you got older no no yeah yeah I find

00:37:08

I cry all the time yeah right and it's

00:37:10

good that way it's awesome mate like you

00:37:12

know like I'll be driving on the car and

00:37:14

I'll be like oh I'll think about my kids

00:37:16

or I think you know like I I'm about to

00:37:18

move to go and live in France you know

00:37:20

and the reason why we're going to live

00:37:21

in France is because I married a French

00:37:23

woman and

00:37:24

um and you know I want my two children

00:37:27

with her to speak their mother's tongue

00:37:30

right and and to be raised in you know a

00:37:32

different culture you know because

00:37:33

they've been raised here for a bit we'll

00:37:35

come back and forth but but anyways um

00:37:38

and you know so so I often find myself

00:37:41

going oh you know like you know I think

00:37:43

about my oldest son I'm like oh no

00:37:46

Tara roll down my face or I think about

00:37:48

my daughter and you know like but

00:37:50

they're not tears of sadness they're

00:37:51

tears of joy you know like if like you

00:37:53

realize how much

00:37:55

how tight you are with your family you

00:37:57

know like I don't I've got a lot of

00:37:59

people that I know I've got really good

00:38:02

friends but when it comes down to it the

00:38:05

most important thing is you is your

00:38:07

family so and and that's uh right and um

00:38:10

um you know like I just feel truly

00:38:14

blessed that I that I've got to you know

00:38:16

five wonderful children you know two two

00:38:19

adult children have just been an

00:38:21

absolute privilege you know um I I can't

00:38:25

I can't talk hardly enough about how

00:38:27

lucky I am with with how this turned out

00:38:29

you know so but that all comes down to

00:38:31

Dom it all comes down to being prison

00:38:34

and spending time with your kids yeah

00:38:36

you've got to do the work you've got to

00:38:38

do the work man you have to do the work

00:38:40

and the reward is amazing you know like

00:38:43

um you know my two youngest now like for

00:38:46

me being able to spend time with them

00:38:47

you know like a lot of people don't get

00:38:50

the opportunity to do what I'm doing you

00:38:52

know because you know most of us are

00:38:54

working nine to five or nine to ten or

00:38:56

you know two parents are working we get

00:38:58

home we're tired we're the last thing we

00:39:00

want to do is like go and read a book or

00:39:02

engage with their kids you know we just

00:39:03

want a bit of time for ourselves so I

00:39:05

completely get that right but so I feel

00:39:07

like I'm really lucky that I've you know

00:39:10

I I can do all those things my kids I

00:39:12

get to Bath and I get to hang out with

00:39:13

them I get so you know and I get down on

00:39:15

their level you know but it came a time

00:39:18

for a little bit over you know I started

00:39:21

enjoying myself a little bit too much

00:39:22

and partying and you know like around I

00:39:25

just went with us like after you after

00:39:27

your first marriage yeah after yeah

00:39:29

after after 40 uh you know like you know

00:39:31

it's and I go through the party stage

00:39:33

you know

00:39:34

and um I can remember not so long ago

00:39:37

just thinking wow

00:39:40

I'm gonna stop this man you know like

00:39:42

this is just bollocks you know like

00:39:44

and and I did and the closer then I felt

00:39:49

this closeness and this bond with my

00:39:51

children just come back you know because

00:39:53

you're present again you know you're not

00:39:55

thinking about oh what am I going to do

00:39:56

this weekend or where am I going or I've

00:39:58

got to hang out and I don't know you

00:40:00

know they say your focus is then you

00:40:02

know and when your focus becomes in

00:40:04

which is as it should be then they you

00:40:07

can develop like beautiful human beings

00:40:10

you know and you can arm them with the

00:40:11

right stuff because schooling and all

00:40:14

that stuff I think we arm our kids with

00:40:15

the wrong [ __ ] we need to arm our

00:40:17

children with you know

00:40:18

it's a bloody tough out there man like

00:40:21

the mental health side of things you

00:40:23

know competing with people all that sort

00:40:24

of stuff we've got to give them

00:40:26

different tools to work out how they get

00:40:28

ahead in life and it's not by you know

00:40:31

you don't get ahead of Life by having

00:40:32

more money than anybody else you've just

00:40:34

got to be balanced loved nurtured you

00:40:36

know like that's the way to go I reckon

00:40:38

because then everything just balances

00:40:40

itself out you're like money gives you

00:40:42

money money gives you a little bit of

00:40:45

freedom in there but it's you know and

00:40:47

then by the other token you know poor

00:40:48

people yes I I you go to India this is

00:40:51

real cool I went to India and these

00:40:53

little kids come out of these

00:40:55

horvels and they got big smiles on their

00:40:58

faces right and I was like wow you live

00:41:00

in an absolute [ __ ] like I mean a

00:41:03

[ __ ] right like you just wouldn't go

00:41:06

there and they are happy as Larry to see

00:41:09

you you know they just I don't know any

00:41:11

better you know like and we're in New

00:41:13

Zealand we're all like oh that life's

00:41:15

tough it's like we don't know how lucky

00:41:17

we are yeah you know there's a saying I

00:41:19

really like the um comparison is the

00:41:21

theft of Joy which is so true it's like

00:41:23

yeah yeah 100 it's Envy right it's Envy

00:41:26

so when you like and that's that's with

00:41:28

all the Social Media stuff and they say

00:41:30

oh like you know when you get on

00:41:31

Instagram you see all these people with

00:41:32

all these flash lives and that it's a

00:41:34

load of [ __ ] people are putting up

00:41:36

on this and I'm there hey what's you got

00:41:40

to remember is this I don't care if

00:41:42

you've got a trillion dollars you've

00:41:43

still got the same problems we've all

00:41:45

got right you all still want to be loved

00:41:47

you still want to be needy you still

00:41:48

want to be cared for you still want to

00:41:50

be respected right just because you've

00:41:52

got to let doesn't necessarily mean you

00:41:53

have those things right so you know when

00:41:55

people putting up all these flash

00:41:56

pictures and these stories on them and

00:41:58

feed you I'm here and I'm there and I

00:41:59

doubt it uh hey guess what they're still

00:42:02

in the background they've still got all

00:42:03

the same issues you've got you know so

00:42:05

it's just distort stuff it's funny I had

00:42:08

your own mate uh John Kerwin said John

00:42:10

Kerwin on the on the podcast and he's

00:42:11

that's his big drive at the moment like

00:42:13

getting uh like resilience training and

00:42:15

Mental Health Training and primary

00:42:16

schools yeah so um kids with these tools

00:42:18

yeah but the right stuff you know like

00:42:20

it doesn't matter what people think

00:42:22

about you because it doesn't as long as

00:42:25

you uh respectful as long as you care as

00:42:28

long as you are holding yourself in the

00:42:30

right frame and you're in the right

00:42:32

frame of mind then you're like what does

00:42:34

it matter what anybody else thinks it

00:42:36

doesn't you know and that's that's the

00:42:37

thing where all our kids are like you

00:42:39

know ah I I want to be friends with him

00:42:42

or he is just like just get on with your

00:42:45

life you know yeah but yeah I think

00:42:47

you've got to be nice to people it's

00:42:48

like when I was growing up there was a

00:42:50

saying that my parents are still with me

00:42:52

um sticks and stones may broken

00:42:55

but the names the names

00:42:58

do hurt you right that's the thing names

00:43:01

they do hurt you I'd rather get a punch

00:43:03

in the head when somebody say yeah

00:43:06

but it's very true you know all those um

00:43:08

those idioms or whatever you call them

00:43:10

they're all you know they're true to a

00:43:12

certain extent but names do hurt you

00:43:15

that's why like social media is so

00:43:16

powerful so when you read something or

00:43:19

you hear something especially if you

00:43:20

read something you know it sticks with

00:43:22

you right so be careful what you say be

00:43:25

careful what you say to people think

00:43:27

about how it would affect you if that

00:43:29

was said to you you know like and I I'm

00:43:31

no I'm No Angel I've said some nasty

00:43:34

things I've done some nasty things yeah

00:43:36

but there's that saying um if you've got

00:43:38

nothing nice to say don't say it but I I

00:43:40

had a very successful radio career

00:43:43

you've been a a sports um yeah a sports

00:43:46

pundit or whatever it's called you have

00:43:48

to say unkind things yeah yeah yeah well

00:43:50

I think you need to be you know you've

00:43:51

got to speak your truth right but this

00:43:53

time like you know there's times I wish

00:43:56

that even though what I see I I don't

00:43:58

think I've delivered I've never

00:43:59

deliberately seen anything that's untrue

00:44:01

or that I haven't believed you know I

00:44:03

you know I would never like throw

00:44:05

anybody under the bus with a load of

00:44:08

[ __ ] a lot lots of people do that

00:44:09

you know which is disgraceful but you

00:44:12

know even though it is what I believe I

00:44:14

think sometimes you don't need to say it

00:44:16

if it's if it's going to hurt somebody

00:44:18

you know then what's the point of saying

00:44:21

it do you need to say it no like you

00:44:24

know I think in that book I said you

00:44:25

know like

00:44:26

you know I I love Louie you know and but

00:44:29

he wasn't the best coach that I'd had

00:44:31

you know and I and he called himself the

00:44:33

master coach and then in the book I said

00:44:35

you know he's not the master case

00:44:36

although he was a master coach yeah yeah

00:44:39

he was in his particular way he was a

00:44:41

master at doing what he did but you know

00:44:43

the things that I see that I just I wish

00:44:45

I could take it back and go you know

00:44:47

what yeah okay that it's probably true

00:44:50

but I didn't need to say that yeah you

00:44:52

know do you um what's your what's your

00:44:55

self-talk like these days like uh you

00:44:57

know are you quite kind to yourself

00:45:15

what's the point like what's the point

00:45:18

of projecting yourself into the future

00:45:19

you know the future may never come you

00:45:21

know like and that's the other thing you

00:45:22

know we worry about all this [ __ ] oh

00:45:24

this won't even this won't even this way

00:45:26

it might happen you know like we like

00:45:29

these are the things I'm talking about

00:45:30

arming your kids with you know like

00:45:32

don't worry about all the stuff that's

00:45:34

in the future and certainly don't worry

00:45:35

about the stuff that's happened in the

00:45:37

past the only thing that matters is

00:45:39

right here and now because that's the

00:45:40

only thing you can control right so

00:45:42

that's the sort of stuff that I you know

00:45:44

that I really get into it's like and

00:45:46

when you when you ground yourself and

00:45:47

you stay present

00:45:49

right everything just seems to it gets

00:45:52

easier and things get lighter and you

00:45:54

don't take yourself so seriously your

00:45:55

ego doesn't come into play as much and

00:45:57

it's just it's just easy you know like

00:45:59

it's just it's a much it's a much better

00:46:02

place to be in fact it seems like you're

00:46:03

in a good place should I just look on

00:46:05

the clock we've been going for 49

00:46:06

minutes and we haven't even touched upon

00:46:08

the the second part of your career which

00:46:10

is the the Epic TV career

00:46:12

um what time do you have to be out of

00:46:14

here no no we keep going we've got a

00:46:16

school pickup right yeah yeah okay yeah

00:46:18

well I mean the TV stuff we'll get into

00:46:21

this but it's like um what you and Mark

00:46:23

Ellis did is sort of like what a Hamish

00:46:25

and Andy do now what John and Ben do and

00:46:28

except those Hamish Nanny broadcasters

00:46:30

John on being broadcasters you guys epic

00:46:33

sporting Legends before that so that

00:46:35

that needs to be talked about first of

00:46:37

all um like what's your relationship

00:46:39

like now with with your ex Sally uh

00:46:40

bring that up because um there's some

00:46:42

really cute stuff in the book you

00:46:43

actually bumped into Yesterday Pharaoh

00:46:45

fresh which is a supermarket around the

00:46:47

corner yeah no Sally says I've

00:46:49

no she was silly you know like she's the

00:46:52

mother of my two you know two honest

00:46:54

children and it appeared in our lives we

00:46:56

were together and now we're not you know

00:46:58

so no the amicable now was it was it

00:47:00

rough for a while I was it's always

00:47:02

rough when somebody leaves somebody yeah

00:47:05

like it's not easy you know it's it's

00:47:07

you know breakups aren't easy especially

00:47:09

with the kids involved and you know and

00:47:11

then other people get involved so yeah

00:47:13

it wasn't easy but um but you know we're

00:47:16

well through that now and she's got her

00:47:18

life and I've got my life and you know

00:47:20

she's been a great mum to all her

00:47:22

children and you know she's just getting

00:47:23

on with what she's doing some cute cute

00:47:25

stuff in the book so she talks about

00:47:27

when you first met I was at some bar in

00:47:29

Parnell she said you you had your shirt

00:47:31

unbuttoned all the way down to your

00:47:33

belly button oh she was lying I heard

00:47:35

excision three buttons three buttons

00:47:37

down probably

00:47:39

probably definitely a couple but it was

00:47:43

funny though I had no time I had zero

00:47:45

confidence

00:47:46

um you know even though I was an athlete

00:47:48

and all that stuff I just had no zero

00:47:51

confidence well it seems like maybe you

00:47:53

just put on a really good mask or a

00:47:55

really good front because the way she

00:47:57

tells it she was with some guy and

00:47:58

you're like ditch him come with us

00:48:00

seemed like a man with no confidence you

00:48:02

know I I think that I think I do

00:48:05

remember that but I'm pretty sure I

00:48:07

would have been full of piss yeah

00:48:10

that's just a Dutch Carriage I guess but

00:48:13

um and then um she talks about her or

00:48:15

maybe you talk about this well on your

00:48:17

on your first proper date like she

00:48:19

doesn't even speak a word no no she did

00:48:21

she she was very shy yeah she was very

00:48:23

very shy it was hard to you know take

00:48:26

your break through it for sad yeah and

00:48:28

and um and then you talk about flying

00:48:32

like flying backwards and forwards from

00:48:33

Australia like some days some days you'd

00:48:35

wake up in New Zealand fly over to

00:48:37

Australia for a training and then come

00:48:38

back yeah yeah yeah that's Bonkers yeah

00:48:41

I I didn't do that often but that is

00:48:44

that is a man that's in love oh I Love's

00:48:46

a funny thing oh yeah you don't you know

00:48:48

you're quite a romantic guy I'd like I'd

00:48:51

like to think I am although my wife

00:48:52

Chloe is so she seems you came up with

00:48:55

the French one she's my friend how did

00:48:57

you guys meet we met and um we met in we

00:49:00

met in New Zealand yeah I I had a broken

00:49:03

heart at the time I you know I was

00:49:04

riding through the um through the

00:49:06

viaduct on what BMX shirtless no I don't

00:49:09

think it was about 5 30 or 6 o'clock you

00:49:13

know I was on a Friday night I was

00:49:14

Friday through I was just going past

00:49:16

year I was like Scouting Around you know

00:49:18

as you do and um I saw these two girls

00:49:20

walking towards me and and I saw I saw

00:49:24

one was blonde and one was dark here

00:49:36

[Laughter]

00:49:39

she was like I was like oh g'day and I I

00:49:43

just I pretty much just followed around

00:49:44

all night you know like it was

00:49:46

embarrassing and um and her mate came up

00:49:49

to me right at the end of the night and

00:49:51

she said look Matthew I know who you are

00:49:54

but Chloe's got no clue and she's not

00:49:56

interested and I was like oh listen

00:49:59

uh-huh well you're pulling out all the

00:50:01

stuff like this super super challenge

00:50:03

yeah I was falling around I was falling

00:50:04

around I'm riding around on a BMX you

00:50:06

know but I'm an old dude and she said

00:50:07

that's right the first thing she said to

00:50:09

me she goes I haven't how come you're

00:50:11

riding your son's bike

00:50:14

because you know she was only 24 and I

00:50:17

would have been close to I think 40 at

00:50:19

the time and um she uh anyway her friend

00:50:23

said you know she's not interested and I

00:50:25

said oh look she she hasn't seen me

00:50:26

dance yet and so I went up to her and I

00:50:30

said I said I look Chloe I said look I'm

00:50:32

going to leave you alone it was about

00:50:33

three o'clock in the morning I can't

00:50:34

remember what club was in Fort Wayne I

00:50:37

said but can can I just let's just have

00:50:39

a little dance and we're on the Dance

00:50:41

Floor I said look just give me your

00:50:42

number and I'll leave you alone

00:50:43

and she gave me a number the next star I

00:50:46

rang it

00:50:47

and I thought oh she would have thought

00:50:48

about it and you know like she sort of

00:50:50

found out who I am and she said I'll be

00:50:52

sweet I shouldn't I'll be able to go on

00:50:54

a on a date with her because I want to

00:50:56

take her out for dinner and I rang her

00:50:58

and she and she was just cold like it

00:51:00

was like I was like oh hey hey it's me

00:51:03

blah blah blah and she just literally

00:51:05

asked me and then I I got off the phone

00:51:08

I was like oh that didn't go too well

00:51:09

and then she sent me a tea she said hey

00:51:10

Matthew it's complete it was nice

00:51:12

meeting you last night but I'm

00:51:13

understood you know just leave me alone

00:51:15

and I was like oh [ __ ] so that really

00:51:17

just brought me back a bit for like

00:51:19

three or four weeks anyway I didn't run

00:51:20

into her again for about four years I

00:51:23

was on a beach and um over at uh in

00:51:26

takapuna and I saw this girl I was like

00:51:28

oh my God who's that you didn't

00:51:30

recognize it I didn't recognize

00:51:32

who's that you know and and she was with

00:51:35

a bunch of friends of mine so I sort of

00:51:37

see me sort of see tomorrow hey look you

00:51:39

know like I'll go on ESP QR tonight you

00:51:41

want to come along you know blah blah

00:51:42

blah thinking that you know she might

00:51:43

hear him I come along you know because

00:51:45

she was sort of looking at me through

00:51:46

her glasses and I could see her looking

00:51:48

at me and I was looking at her anyway so

00:51:51

the penny dropped for him no it was the

00:51:53

penny drop for her but not for me yeah

00:51:54

right so so my mate my mate rang me as I

00:51:59

was hitting home he goes oh mate you

00:52:01

didn't tell me you knew Chloe I said

00:52:03

what what are you talking about

00:52:05

she reckons you'd try to you asked her

00:52:07

out a few years ago I said

00:52:09

this girl in my life and I completely

00:52:11

forgotten about it but anyway so I ran

00:52:13

into it at the um she did turn up to

00:52:16

spqr and I and I said hey I've got a

00:52:19

bone to pick with you you know blah blah

00:52:21

blah he said oh you don't remember

00:52:23

she told me so I was like oh you're the

00:52:25

girl and then from there that that was

00:52:27

it so we just we spent about three four

00:52:30

months together and then she went off to

00:52:31

Dubai and a long distance relationship

00:52:33

and then we just decided [ __ ] you know

00:52:35

like she tried to forget me I try to

00:52:37

forget her

00:52:39

just didn't happen and now she's trying

00:52:41

to forgive me again she's she's shot off

00:52:43

to France she's been there for six weeks

00:52:44

and now I'm gonna chase her again over

00:52:46

there so yeah timing's a funny thing

00:52:50

why was she Frosty on your first time

00:52:52

yes she was and that's right I'm sorry

00:52:55

that's right so so I I call her and

00:52:58

she's sitting in the car with her with

00:53:00

her boyfriend oh [ __ ] so my phone my my

00:53:04

name comes through on her phone and he's

00:53:05

like so why is Matthew Rich calling and

00:53:08

she's like oh I don't know like you know

00:53:11

we hadn't done anything or anything like

00:53:12

that but just a fact and so she why are

00:53:14

you giving your number she was she

00:53:17

actually got engaged to that guy and

00:53:18

went over to Cairns and was about to

00:53:20

marry him and then just went nah I'm I'm

00:53:23

not going to do it and she came back to

00:53:24

New Zealand and I was in New Zealand and

00:53:26

that's when we met at the beach yeah so

00:53:28

it was meant to be amazing amazing

00:53:30

you've got five kids so you got two two

00:53:33

one with Kelly one with Carly London

00:53:35

who's who is a freaky he's a freakiest

00:53:38

soccer but he's gonna be

00:53:39

he is he's a real talent how old is he

00:53:42

and where do they live yeah he's 11. so

00:53:44

they live

00:53:46

um London lives with with me and and

00:53:49

Carly but but he'd be spending more time

00:53:51

with Carly now obviously but but he'll

00:53:53

be coming up to Europe and Christmas and

00:53:54

that sort of thing but they live in

00:53:56

mangere Bridge he's a real good soccer

00:53:58

player and

00:53:59

um yeah I think he I think he could go

00:54:01

places actually let's see what happens

00:54:03

here but um yeah and then obviously uh

00:54:06

with with my wife Chloe we've got Kenzo

00:54:09

who's nearly five and Lolo who's nearly

00:54:12

three is it quite nice having these sort

00:54:14

of three the three chapters of your life

00:54:16

yeah it is actually like um I tell you

00:54:19

what having two children really close

00:54:20

together like uh Kenzo and Lola are two

00:54:22

years apart and that's been a real

00:54:24

eye-opener for us it's actually

00:54:26

I don't know how people do it it's quite

00:54:28

hard like I don't know how normal when I

00:54:30

say normal people people have to work

00:54:32

every day mum and dad have to work every

00:54:34

day and raise their kids especially

00:54:36

young children like that I don't know

00:54:38

how they do it like because like

00:54:40

I'm a full-time dad you know we're lucky

00:54:43

enough to be able to spend time with our

00:54:44

kids and it is hard work yeah you know

00:54:47

like it is full on you know like you you

00:54:49

don't get any time for yourself until

00:54:51

they go to bed you know like and Chloe's

00:54:53

over there now you know they're not in

00:54:55

daycare they're not in school yet and

00:54:56

you know so she said sort of six weeks

00:54:59

and she's beside herself you know like

00:55:01

it's it's it's mentally challenging you

00:55:03

know because they're just so demonic

00:55:05

they're amazing but holy holy smokes

00:55:08

like it's hard work do you think um yeah

00:55:12

because of the the age and the stage and

00:55:14

the place you're in your life you like

00:55:15

you're a bit of dead now with this yeah

00:55:17

yeah yeah yeah yeah well because when I

00:55:19

had uh Jamie in Boston I was focused on

00:55:23

my Sport and all that sort of stuff it

00:55:24

was cool because I I I wasn't working in

00:55:27

nine to five so and I love the baby

00:55:29

stage and all that sort of stuff but but

00:55:31

I was still sort of more focused on

00:55:33

myself and you know trying to be the

00:55:35

best best athlete I could be and trying

00:55:37

to get ahead in life and you know make

00:55:39

money buy a house you know just do all

00:55:41

those things all right let's um get into

00:55:43

this TV stuff correct me if I get this

00:55:45

wrong but Julie Christie Dame Julie

00:55:46

Christie so she gets you to host the the

00:55:49

game show the chair is that how it

00:55:51

starts how your TV thinks it was a TV

00:55:55

show John Macon Road

00:55:57

heaps of shows I know I think we started

00:56:02

we Mecca and I got together on it was

00:56:05

Julie's idea but it was ancient New

00:56:07

Zealand time of your life I remember

00:56:08

that with um

00:56:11

and they hosted the show but we had a

00:56:13

segment inside the show right and and I

00:56:16

can't remember but anyway yeah we had a

00:56:18

segment back and I had a segment inside

00:56:19

the show and it just just sort of

00:56:21

everybody liked it and it just took off

00:56:23

and then how are you two friends did you

00:56:25

play together in the Warriors did you

00:56:27

talk yeah yeah we meet each other at the

00:56:28

Warriors so I don't know why Julie

00:56:31

decided that Mike and I should get

00:56:33

together I don't know how it happened

00:56:34

and she just said look you know do you

00:56:36

guys want to do a TV show and I we you

00:56:38

know we went right okay and then from

00:56:41

that we got the fresh up and the deep in

00:56:42

ads and then from that it just ballooned

00:56:45

into we'll show you know game two halves

00:56:47

going on with it and we did game three

00:56:49

hours for 10 years and then and then we

00:56:51

we sort of did our own spin-off we yeah

00:56:53

the rocky road series the rocky roads

00:56:55

which are awesome and then you know in

00:56:57

between there the I did the chair and

00:56:59

which yeah so then Mcenroe got there so

00:57:02

the BBC like I nearly got that show I

00:57:05

nearly ended up doing it in the BBC you

00:57:08

know TV stuff was

00:57:10

it was really interesting but it's like

00:57:11

I said at the start you know like you

00:57:13

you give yourself a character and you

00:57:16

know everybody loved macca you know

00:57:18

they're likable Rogues yeah he's the

00:57:20

likable Rogue you know and then there's

00:57:21

a [ __ ] you know like the brooding you

00:57:23

know so that that was that was uh that

00:57:25

was the role that we both took you know

00:57:27

and that was real cool you know so so it

00:57:29

actually worked really well you know and

00:57:31

and I used to send myself up all the

00:57:34

time and you know like and we were

00:57:36

really competitive as well you know we

00:57:37

were trying to beat each other and that

00:57:39

sort of stuff and we just had amazing

00:57:41

chemistry you know but we got on like a

00:57:43

house on fire we both

00:57:45

both um you know enjoyed each other's

00:57:48

company we had the best you know we were

00:57:50

super lucky to achieve what we did in

00:57:52

television and you know like

00:57:54

you know I want to I think back and we

00:57:56

made shitloads of money like it was

00:57:59

ridiculous amount of money we were

00:58:00

getting paid to do what we were doing to

00:58:02

have a bit of fun you know like

00:58:04

um it was just it was it was real cool I

00:58:06

I felt really privileged to to create

00:58:09

something like that with with a really

00:58:11

good dude and and Julie Christie was

00:58:13

amazing you know I like her foresight

00:58:15

and and Daryl McEwan he was involved in

00:58:17

all that stuff he he was he was a bit of

00:58:19

a genius as well so you know we had

00:58:21

really good um people that were looking

00:58:22

after us but we just had their chemistry

00:58:25

you know and and um and people seem to

00:58:27

like it well the fact it went for so

00:58:29

long I think has uh proof of that right

00:58:31

yeah it was funny and then tvnz decided

00:58:33

that they were like it was it was still

00:58:36

raiding pretty well but I think there

00:58:38

was a change at tvnz and

00:58:41

um the guy came in either or the big

00:58:43

boss said I look you know if you're

00:58:45

going to do it again you have to take a

00:58:46

pay cut and me and Mecca were like what

00:58:48

right no so we just bend it and then we

00:58:52

we pretty much just bend everything

00:58:54

right and so when that finished oh I

00:58:57

just hear we just decided oh

00:58:59

you know we'd had a good run and that

00:59:01

was pretty much it you know yeah were

00:59:04

you guys quite quite close because I was

00:59:05

sort of found with radio Partnerships I

00:59:07

think yeah you spend so much time with

00:59:08

each other you can be good friends but

00:59:10

not definitely 100 yeah yeah we would

00:59:13

definitely like mac and I have like a

00:59:15

good mates do we see each other all the

00:59:17

time absolutely not I can't remember the

00:59:19

last time I've seen Mark you know like

00:59:20

but he leads uh you know he's an

00:59:23

international jet Setter and he leads a

00:59:24

life and and so do I so

00:59:27

um but yeah we we were tight as when we

00:59:31

were together but we led a completely

00:59:33

different life away from you know from

00:59:35

our television stuff when he when he

00:59:37

started his Juice company he wasn't like

00:59:39

oh Matthew do you want to you want to

00:59:40

buy into this um

00:59:46

he did very well you know and and he

00:59:48

deserved it so yeah you know he worked

00:59:50

hard and he copped a lot of shirt and

00:59:52

you know but you know Oh you mean the um

00:59:55

the court thing with the yeah selling

00:59:58

some pills yeah

01:00:04

that happened when we were we were

01:00:06

overseas we're in the UK right so he was

01:00:08

just Charlie's was just launching or was

01:00:11

just going public and we were in the UK

01:00:13

filming for

01:00:15

um for Rocky Road and he got this phone

01:00:18

call Julie Ray me and she goes Matthew I

01:00:21

can't believe it's not you I'm like

01:00:24

she goes but I need to speak to Mark and

01:00:27

I'm like oh okay and I can remember

01:00:30

watching him and he was just like it

01:00:32

just floored him right and that there

01:00:33

was a thing about Macaro like I'd love

01:00:36

him to death man and I'd do anything for

01:00:38

him and I always felt like like I just

01:00:40

felt like you know he was always a

01:00:41

happy-go-lucky really um but he was

01:00:44

actually a very serious person you know

01:00:46

like he he wasn't as happy-go-lucky as

01:00:48

he seemed you know like yeah he had a

01:00:50

deep thinking side oh he was a very deep

01:00:52

thinker you know and and and you know

01:00:55

like I he he he thought long and hard

01:00:58

about things and you know like you know

01:01:01

like to the point where he would get

01:01:02

down on himself you know you could you

01:01:05

could see that sort of stuff but he will

01:01:07

betray that he was a happy-go-lucky dude

01:01:09

right and there you go that's the thing

01:01:11

you know like so you know like just

01:01:13

because you see somebody as that it

01:01:15

doesn't necessarily mean that that's

01:01:16

their life you know everyone's got a

01:01:19

mask to some degree yeah 100 100 and you

01:01:22

know like that's what I see into at the

01:01:25

start of the show you know you have to

01:01:26

wear a cloak especially if you're a

01:01:27

public figure because if you don't mate

01:01:30

you let all these people in you just get

01:01:31

burned yeah that was a rough time for

01:01:33

him I remember his um little uh Speech

01:01:35

outside uh Court after his appearance it

01:01:38

seems um particularly rutlets that sort

01:01:40

of thing never happens now it's like if

01:01:42

you turn up to a festival with a bunch

01:01:43

of pills yeah yeah you and your mates

01:01:45

the police are uninterested yeah yeah no

01:01:47

they're interested in the commentator

01:01:48

but they were they weren't interested in

01:01:49

America they were trying to get me and

01:01:51

obviously they were real fizzed about

01:01:53

getting me but I wasn't there right

01:01:55

because I were there trying to get you

01:01:57

on all right no no they were they were

01:01:59

hoping it was me because

01:02:01

they'd staked out and toddy got done too

01:02:04

it's already got done before during

01:02:06

cocaine for Lana cocroft right

01:02:09

and

01:02:12

um I was in the hotel in the foyer and

01:02:16

macro had been been and gone and seen

01:02:19

that obviously seen him on camera and

01:02:21

and Tony gone up and down until he came

01:02:23

down and goes oh mate old babe what'd

01:02:25

she go up and see him I was like ah no

01:02:26

can't be asked you know and um but they

01:02:30

they had me on camera in the foyer right

01:02:32

so they had all these people coming and

01:02:33

going coming and going coming and going

01:02:34

coming and going right so yeah someone

01:02:37

was watching over you that day yeah well

01:02:39

yeah like but yeah funny hey yeah that

01:02:42

was kind of funny it seems like there

01:02:44

was um a hedonistic time I I've had Mike

01:02:46

King on the podcast and he talked about

01:02:48

how much coke he was doing in the game

01:02:50

of two halves days oh yeah I see like I

01:02:53

I think we're all smashing the [ __ ] out

01:02:55

of it to something you know like we're

01:02:57

definitely like um yeah like we've all

01:03:00

lived a pretty vigorous life there's no

01:03:03

doubt about it you know but what I will

01:03:05

say is as you get older you cannot live

01:03:08

like that you know like just it makes

01:03:10

absolutely no sense you don't have the

01:03:12

time and you know what I I'll say this

01:03:15

about

01:03:15

um you know I I love having a drink and

01:03:18

having a bit of fun just like the next

01:03:20

person but the downside is just so much

01:03:23

worse than the upside yeah you know what

01:03:25

I mean like it's gonna have a big one

01:03:27

you've got to pick and choose and you've

01:03:28

got to pick and choose and then you know

01:03:30

like even then it's like oh now I'm just

01:03:32

like man I I just I just do not want to

01:03:34

feel down for two three days you know

01:03:36

like and croc or whatever and it's all

01:03:38

good fun but you know and you push

01:03:39

through and you're like four o'clock

01:03:41

five o'clock in the morning you're like

01:03:42

hey

01:03:54

together you know we do everything

01:03:55

together that's that's that's why we're

01:03:57

we're soul mates you know like yeah we

01:04:00

don't do anything not together right so

01:04:02

and and and she's a heathen and I was a

01:04:05

heathen you know this is how we work

01:04:07

what are your advice is now do you like

01:04:08

a bit of weed no I don't know I I

01:04:10

honestly I don't know I've I've pretty

01:04:13

much just kicked everything into touch

01:04:14

hey just because I really just don't

01:04:17

have the time it's not desire it see for

01:04:20

me I'm uh I'm an allen or all out right

01:04:24

so if I'm into something I'm all into it

01:04:26

right and so it's it becomes a lifestyle

01:04:28

and you know like

01:04:31

I I just don't have the time or the

01:04:33

inclination or all the wand I've been

01:04:35

there I've done it I've had my fund you

01:04:36

know like and I I've

01:04:38

smashed a living [ __ ] out of it right so

01:04:40

I just don't need to do it anymore you

01:04:42

know like it's not that I I I won't have

01:04:45

a drink with my mates or have some fun

01:04:47

with my mates or whatever but now I just

01:04:49

I just it's like hey there's a time and

01:04:52

a place and if if you know it's but it's

01:04:55

it's not every weekend or it's not every

01:04:56

week or it's not even you know like it's

01:04:58

just varieties of spice of life and

01:05:00

everything but the moderation oh it's

01:05:02

good that you you've got it under

01:05:03

control yeah because I talked to my king

01:05:05

about this I said oh when when did it

01:05:07

get to the point that it became like a

01:05:08

chore for you or boring and he was like

01:05:10

it never did yeah it never did yeah I

01:05:12

know you think about Coke every day no

01:05:14

it didn't for me either but it's just it

01:05:16

got to the point where I was like hey

01:05:17

you know like that this isn't really me

01:05:19

you know like I guess I'm better than

01:05:21

this you know you just go down you go

01:05:23

down a deep dark hole as well you know

01:05:25

like it becomes becomes habitual and

01:05:27

then you know then you just you lose

01:05:29

sight of the things that are important

01:05:31

okay you seem to have like no no chip on

01:05:33

your shoulder or anything these days so

01:05:34

you're quite Zen are you quite a thin

01:05:36

dude I don't have a chip on my shoulder

01:05:37

yeah I I about anything or anyone no I

01:05:40

like it there's just no point you know

01:05:43

like I just you know like I'll call a

01:05:45

spade a spade and I'll I'll call it how

01:05:47

I see it but like I say you know like we

01:05:50

watch Cars for a living my son and I and

01:05:52

we run quite successful businesses and

01:05:54

that sort of stuff you know we're not

01:05:55

just calling is but we do okay but you

01:05:58

know like I I I try and serve people you

01:06:01

know I I get a real joy out of doing

01:06:04

what I do you know I just I just find

01:06:06

Dominique that you know that if you're

01:06:08

if you're kind to people you get

01:06:10

kindness back it's taken me a long time

01:06:12

to work that out but you know like

01:06:14

you know like people have an opinion

01:06:16

about me and all that sort of stuff and

01:06:18

you know I can see if I walk into a

01:06:20

restaurant here or whatever you know

01:06:22

people look at you and you know you can

01:06:23

see some people raise their eyes or

01:06:25

whatever well I just let all that go you

01:06:27

know and I I just try and when I meet

01:06:31

people just try and let them see me for

01:06:33

who I am and I try and see them for who

01:06:35

they are and life just becomes a lot

01:06:38

more lighter if you're not telling

01:06:40

yourself so seriously you know like a

01:06:42

[ __ ] made us well you know what it's

01:06:43

like we're only here for a short time

01:06:45

yeah absolutely and then we're dust mate

01:06:47

you know like that's it like so why have

01:06:50

all the angst why carry around this ego

01:06:52

and all that sort of stuff like I just

01:06:53

reckon it's easier to be stay in the

01:06:56

prison

01:06:57

and do the things you want to do and

01:06:59

your um your mental health over the

01:07:01

years it's been it's been pretty good

01:07:03

like I've been really lucky right you

01:07:05

know like I you know like I'll have a

01:07:07

cry and all that sort of stuff but I I

01:07:08

like being emotional like if I'm an

01:07:10

emotional person like oh

01:07:13

there's part of it do you think that's

01:07:15

just a natural progression with your age

01:07:17

or is that come from having like a

01:07:18

European wife

01:07:19

oh you know how the Europeans are it's a

01:07:21

different it's a natural progression of

01:07:23

my age but my wife is fire is buggery

01:07:25

like me you know so

01:07:27

so we we you know but but you know as

01:07:30

you get older like you sort of like you

01:07:34

realize what works and what doesn't and

01:07:36

you know raising your voice and yelling

01:07:37

and screaming it

01:07:38

doesn't do anything other than just I I

01:07:41

tell you what I noticed when I raise my

01:07:42

voice my kids start raising their voices

01:07:44

and then when you're aware of that

01:07:46

you're like wow that's just I can't

01:07:47

communicate like that you know I like it

01:07:49

so I've just got to try and just you

01:07:51

know we get frustrated everybody does

01:07:53

you know says things that you don't mean

01:07:54

all that stuff but just and then if you

01:07:56

do something if if you if you say

01:07:58

something to you know that's

01:08:01

you know out of line or whatever just

01:08:03

say sorry it's simple like I I'm always

01:08:06

saying sorry when I when it's not even

01:08:08

my fault hey babe I'm sorry yeah it's

01:08:11

just [ __ ] said so and like just take

01:08:12

the heat out of the situation oh I'm

01:08:14

sorry man I didn't mean to do that you

01:08:16

know I'm sorry if you're upset you know

01:08:17

like as long as you're genuine that's

01:08:20

all you can that's and that's you know

01:08:21

when somebody says sorry that's it

01:08:23

there's nowhere else you can go from

01:08:24

there yeah so if the person you've said

01:08:26

sorry to still wants to carry a joke

01:08:28

we'll beat them sorry mate if that's on

01:08:30

there that's on them you know like and

01:08:32

if sorry is an easy word to say yeah it

01:08:34

actually is and then it just disarms the

01:08:36

whole situation if

01:08:39

the heart of the apology the harder it

01:08:41

is to say that oh yeah but like you

01:08:43

you've got to like you've got to own

01:08:44

your situation that's the thing you've

01:08:46

got to own it like it like if you've

01:08:48

realized you're wrong then don't dick

01:08:50

around with not apologizing yeah you

01:08:52

know like just get on the front foot and

01:08:54

say hey pick up the phone or go and see

01:08:56

and say hey look I'm really sorry that

01:08:58

wasn't me or yeah that wasn't I you know

01:09:00

that

01:09:01

I shouldn't have said that or whatever

01:09:03

you know you just got to own it yeah

01:09:05

you've got to be you've got to take

01:09:06

responsibility for your actions your

01:09:09

words and all that stuff and when you

01:09:10

own that stuff then you just mate you

01:09:13

can sit back and go hey look yep

01:09:16

shouldn't have done it but I've

01:09:17

apologized that's all I can do and

01:09:18

that's all you can do what are you going

01:09:20

to do what what's the best thing to do

01:09:21

well well now mate yeah no no no no it's

01:09:23

not good enough I'm sorry what else

01:09:25

would you like me to do do I have to

01:09:27

Nick myself or you know like at least at

01:09:29

that point it's like you've got your

01:09:30

your hands and yeah yeah yeah as long as

01:09:33

it's a genuine apology you know like

01:09:35

it's and and that's I just find that if

01:09:38

you can step up to the plate real

01:09:41

quickly and get that out of the way it's

01:09:44

so much easier that's a mess of um Navy

01:09:46

Seals thing it's one of their golden

01:09:47

rules it's like own as much of your [ __ ]

01:09:49

it's hard like if it's your

01:09:51

responsibility own it yeah if you if

01:09:54

it's not you and you you haven't made

01:09:55

that mistake or you know like it's

01:09:57

somebody else's fault then hey cool but

01:09:59

you know like all this conflict and all

01:10:01

this angst it's just we don't need to

01:10:04

have it most of the time it all comes

01:10:06

back to our ego it's all how everybody's

01:10:09

positioning themselves in it right so if

01:10:11

you can let go of you go and go what's

01:10:13

the matter because it doesn't yeah well

01:10:15

it's going to change the world no

01:10:16

nothing when um when did when did you I

01:10:19

mean you you had every ride in the world

01:10:20

to have have like a big ego like you're

01:10:22

very very good at sports very successful

01:10:25

very successful at TV when um when did

01:10:28

the how did you strip the year go back I

01:10:30

just sort of when I'd let when I left

01:10:33

Sally and I just started thinking about

01:10:36

you know what life's all about and you

01:10:37

know like

01:10:39

where am I what am I doing where am I

01:10:41

from what what's important to me and I

01:10:43

just started reading you know and I just

01:10:44

you know it sounds Eerie Fury and all

01:10:46

that sort of stuff but I just got into

01:10:48

you know reading about spirituality and

01:10:52

you know spirit and just you know and I

01:10:54

don't like to push that stuff on anybody

01:10:56

you know but that's just that's the road

01:10:58

that I that I took and that I I always

01:11:01

just you know I just come back to it

01:11:03

it's it's I guess it's like religion if

01:11:05

you're religious that's what you're into

01:11:07

but I I'm more into that stuff whereas

01:11:09

it's nobody pushed it on me I just I

01:11:12

just I sort of found my way to it and

01:11:14

just asking questions about you know why

01:11:16

am I here what age am I here for because

01:11:19

I'm not here to chase a little either

01:11:20

around I I'm not here to make money so

01:11:22

those were the questions that I was

01:11:24

asking to just you know

01:11:25

and I just found books and stuff on that

01:11:27

and in a way I went so but you know but

01:11:29

you slip back into your ways

01:11:32

but I I tell you what I'm challenging

01:11:34

everybody to to say this isn't true you

01:11:37

feel way better when you live in the

01:11:38

present when you don't project yourself

01:11:40

into the future you know you're thinking

01:11:42

about art you know it's okay to plan and

01:11:44

all that stuff and then stuff that's

01:11:46

happened in the past it's a past he is

01:11:49

you know okay own it say sorry whatever

01:11:51

blah blah blah but it's the past I can't

01:11:54

change it that's the future that might

01:11:56

never happen the only thing I can

01:11:57

control is here and now and when you

01:11:59

live there in the here and now and it's

01:12:00

real hard to do because our minds play

01:12:02

tricks on us yeah and we always you know

01:12:04

you know you'll be driving along you

01:12:06

know when you're driving along this is

01:12:07

what drive along you're drifting away

01:12:09

and you're thinking you're thinking then

01:12:10

you catch yourself and you go what am I

01:12:12

thinking about

01:12:13

oh I'm thinking about [ __ ] in the future

01:12:16

yeah or [ __ ] in the past yeah what the

01:12:18

wake up mate yeah you know I saw a

01:12:21

therapist a couple of years ago and she

01:12:22

was like when when your mind starts

01:12:24

wandering like that you need to when you

01:12:26

realize you're pulling yourself back in

01:12:27

ask yourself is this helpful yeah and if

01:12:29

it's not just [ __ ] better yeah hard

01:12:31

so it's it's like you've actually got to

01:12:33

watch yourself you know so you step

01:12:35

outside yourself and you just watch

01:12:37

yourself and you just watch it and you

01:12:39

look at your mind ticking over and you

01:12:40

go and when you do that you're like wow

01:12:42

it's it's actually real good even just

01:12:44

talking about it you can actually see it

01:12:46

you know so it's

01:12:48

that's the sort of thing that um you

01:12:50

know that that's that's what I I try and

01:12:52

live my life by now and and you know I

01:12:55

and I was very eager Cisco I was very

01:12:57

driven I was very aggressive I was very

01:12:59

like you know I'm gonna get there and

01:13:00

all that sort of stuff but that's

01:13:02

important but I think what the most

01:13:04

important thing is is to be a decent

01:13:06

person yeah I mean everything that

01:13:08

you've been through in your in your life

01:13:10

has taken you to um where you are today

01:13:12

and the person you are today but uh

01:13:13

would you change anything if you could

01:13:15

go back

01:13:19

[Laughter]

01:13:32

there'd be a few things I'd change maybe

01:13:35

maybe I don't know mate I don't know I I

01:13:37

would I would I would definitely be

01:13:39

definitely be a lot Kinder you know I

01:13:43

would definitely say to that young man

01:13:44

you don't need to be like that you don't

01:13:46

need to you know like because normally

01:13:48

most of the time when you react to stuff

01:13:50

it's because you've been injured right

01:13:52

so if you can if you can just forget

01:13:54

about that stuff forget about the eye

01:13:56

then you usually you're okay start

01:13:58

thinking more about how other people

01:14:00

feel and then just life becomes a lot

01:14:03

easier you know and then and you know

01:14:05

what when you actually give a [ __ ] about

01:14:06

how everybody else is going things

01:14:08

actually

01:14:09

started going really good for you

01:14:10

because people see you as something oh

01:14:13

wow

01:14:14

not that you want it to be like that but

01:14:16

it's just it's just it just sort of

01:14:17

manifests I hate those sort of words but

01:14:20

yeah no no it's it's true that's like

01:14:22

the um I think this is even a Biblical

01:14:24

thing you know you reap what you say

01:14:25

yeah it's like you know what is so corny

01:14:28

that's it's not corny but you reap what

01:14:30

you sow it's like if you put out

01:14:32

on this on that if you if you are an

01:14:36

angry person you're just going to

01:14:37

attract angry people if you're a loving

01:14:40

caring nurturing person that's what

01:14:41

you're going to attract and it's the

01:14:43

truth right so

01:14:44

yeah um I think it's funny if we were

01:14:47

specific we first of all we never would

01:14:49

have been sitting here 15 20 years ago

01:14:51

but if we if we were having this

01:14:52

conversation it would have been a very

01:14:53

different conversation way different

01:14:55

yeah 100 so like and but that's what I

01:14:58

mean Don when we talk about you know we

01:15:00

teach our kids the wrong stuff at school

01:15:02

this is so these are the sorts of

01:15:04

conversations we need to be having with

01:15:05

our children you know like

01:15:07

you know six educational that sort of

01:15:09

stuff yeah that's important but how do

01:15:11

you become a good person what's

01:15:13

important you know like it and I I just

01:15:15

I just don't think there's anything

01:15:17

we're not teaching their kids the right

01:15:19

things at school maths and English and

01:15:21

all that stuff is really important but

01:15:23

the holistic side of life we don't get

01:15:26

any of that stuff you know we like I had

01:15:29

to find it all on my own yeah I was 33

01:15:32

before I went oh what do you mean

01:15:33

there's a book on

01:15:34

stuff about what I've been thinking

01:15:37

about but I didn't nobody's really told

01:15:40

me about it other than religion and I

01:15:42

don't like religion because that's dogma

01:15:44

and a whole set of rules right yeah and

01:15:46

I'm not really into all these rules so

01:15:49

there you go we could talk for ages and

01:15:51

ages yeah no so what about low points in

01:15:53

your life you mentioned before like when

01:15:54

you were when you when you the very

01:15:55

first time you met um you're now wife

01:15:57

how are you nursing a broken heart yeah

01:15:59

is that oh yeah broken hearts are real

01:16:03

bad but yeah the low points have been

01:16:05

you know like I when I was 16 I ran from

01:16:08

a care but that's right this is this is

01:16:11

a thread that runs through your book

01:16:12

this lady this lady Pamela Hopkins was

01:16:14

the name of man I don't know how this

01:16:17

lady can live with a selfie like

01:16:19

seriously how the [ __ ] you can live with

01:16:21

yourself lady I I've forgiven her but

01:16:23

it's like it's it was disgusting what

01:16:25

she did to us well we we were wrong like

01:16:28

we ran from a kid without pain

01:16:31

you're a kid she we were 16 years old so

01:16:34

we got picked up from a from a an

01:16:36

address and how like she dropped us a

01:16:38

Green Lane we jumped down the camera and

01:16:39

sprinted you know she was done dust you

01:16:42

know the the cops came to my door and

01:16:44

like uh at four o'clock in the morning

01:16:48

and um

01:16:49

and said you know all the cost winners

01:16:52

my house in this one detective detective

01:16:54

Sergeant Street do you want to hear the

01:16:55

story yeah yeah I mean I've read it

01:16:57

recently but most people wouldn't of it

01:16:59

so he he the street guy took me into

01:17:02

into the lounge and he said oh so and I

01:17:04

said I sir I'm so sorry I ran from a cab

01:17:07

without paying we need to uh our mower

01:17:10

Lawns I'll pay her money back it was I

01:17:11

don't know how much it was it was 20

01:17:12

bucks we'll pay a hundred you know like

01:17:14

it was just like and he goes oh well

01:17:17

that's not what happened Matthew you

01:17:18

held a knife to her throat and you stole

01:17:21

60 off for it but an almost 16 year old

01:17:24

never been in trouble before you know

01:17:25

like I'm in I'm in my house my

01:17:28

grandfather's got one eye he's getting

01:17:29

out my grandmother's still in bed I said

01:17:31

dad just wait in that in the in the

01:17:33

dining room

01:17:34

anyway I said no that's not true anyway

01:17:37

so they go into my bedroom and I go into

01:17:39

they're looking for money or whatever

01:17:41

and they don't find anything and then we

01:17:42

go back into the dining room where my

01:17:44

dad is and I said oh Dad

01:17:46

look oh I I because they wanted me to go

01:17:49

down the police and said Dad they want

01:17:50

me to go down the police station because

01:17:51

they think that I've held a knife to a

01:17:53

lady straight and stole 60 off her and

01:17:56

the cop that said that to me this

01:17:57

detective [ __ ] shriek goes where'd

01:17:59

you get that information from son

01:18:01

and and I was like but isn't that what

01:18:04

you told me when we were because what

01:18:07

are you talking about

01:18:08

and I was like holy [ __ ] you know to

01:18:11

myself I'm like oh but I still didn't

01:18:13

really know what to think right so we go

01:18:15

down the police station

01:18:17

and um

01:18:18

you know we just go through all that

01:18:21

sort of rubbish you know bloody blah

01:18:23

blah blah they didn't find anything

01:18:24

there was no thing anyway this lady

01:18:27

she'd obviously said that we'd done this

01:18:28

a bit but cut a long story short there'd

01:18:31

been a spade of aggravated Robbies on

01:18:33

taxi drivers there and that police

01:18:34

hadn't been able to solve it right and

01:18:37

um the the co-op the taxi carpet they

01:18:40

were providing money for people that you

01:18:41

know had to take time offer so she had

01:18:43

to take time off work and she got a bit

01:18:44

of money and all the [ __ ] anyway we

01:18:46

go to trial the first trials are Hungary

01:18:49

and it's a high court so 12 10 people

01:18:51

said we were innocent two people said we

01:18:53

went the next trial we got thrown out

01:18:55

the third trial we got found guilty in

01:18:58

the summing up the judge is summing up

01:19:00

because our story didn't change from

01:19:01

minute one from the day we we got

01:19:04

arrested to the last last you know the

01:19:07

day we had our court case of the last

01:19:09

three call cases

01:19:10

her story changed all the [ __ ] time

01:19:12

one minute I was sitting behind her next

01:19:14

minute disco I was here the next minute

01:19:16

we'd done this this sort of how you like

01:19:17

her story was there were holes in her

01:19:20

story like you would not [ __ ] believe

01:19:22

right and um the judging is summing up

01:19:25

said now you may look at these two boys

01:19:28

and think that because their story

01:19:29

hasn't changed this I'm cutting to the

01:19:31

chase a little bit yeah yeah because his

01:19:33

story hasn't changed they've made up

01:19:35

this story and they've stuck to this

01:19:36

story

01:19:37

and sometimes when you're telling the

01:19:39

truth you know your story changes a

01:19:41

little bit no [ __ ] [ __ ] what the [ __ ]

01:19:44

no [ __ ] and what me and Robbie are

01:19:46

sitting here I'm going oh my God we're

01:19:48

[ __ ] and we were [ __ ] you know they

01:19:51

found us guilty blah blah blah and that

01:19:54

it wasn't just running from the cab this

01:19:57

was a charge of aggravated robbery yeah

01:19:59

it's the same as walking into a bank

01:20:01

with a gun and robbing you know a

01:20:03

gunpoint right so it came with a 14-year

01:20:05

jail sentence so we we sat down lawyers

01:20:08

because they always I'm only going to do

01:20:09

all that but anyway this lawyer that we

01:20:11

we got on board he was an old dude he

01:20:12

goes

01:20:13

he just found the official Information

01:20:15

Act got everything that was said

01:20:17

beforehand you know everything that she

01:20:19

had said anyway and the official

01:20:20

information it proved that she'd

01:20:22

withheld the police withheld evidence to

01:20:24

prove she was lying because she said

01:20:25

we'd run from a taxi before she was

01:20:27

positive it was us she said it was two

01:20:29

years earlier on this day to say

01:20:30

probably no I hadn't even met at that

01:20:32

stage I was going to Malibu and Grandma

01:20:33

blah blah blah but the police withheld

01:20:35

that evidence right so they were like no

01:20:37

no we don't need to put that in and um

01:20:39

anyway so we go down oh and then how we

01:20:42

got to challenge the the how we got a

01:20:45

appeal because we appeal descendants we

01:20:47

got we got convicted for aggravated

01:20:50

robbery and we got sentenced to 12

01:20:51

months periodic detention

01:20:53

so when the judge he was reading out

01:20:55

because you have to go and give all the

01:20:57

you know the

01:20:59

the reports the judge and people write

01:21:01

things down for you he how I could see

01:21:03

him looking at going [ __ ] I think I've

01:21:04

got this wrong because people like you

01:21:07

know we're getting all these things

01:21:08

ready and they're like this isn't these

01:21:10

guys blah blah blah anyway

01:21:12

we were allowed to appeal the Sinners

01:21:13

because his summing up was so biased so

01:21:16

when we went down to the appeals court

01:21:18

in Wellington

01:21:19

um you sit in front of three judges you

01:21:21

know a long story short it was thrown

01:21:23

out you know like because it was obvious

01:21:25

we hadn't [ __ ] done it and she was

01:21:27

lying and the police were promoting and

01:21:28

this detective Sergeant shriek prick

01:21:30

right so so about two years later a year

01:21:34

ago yeah maybe a year and a half I made

01:21:36

the old place and I was walking through

01:21:37

the gym at um Institute of sport

01:21:39

and I saw him and I froze you know like

01:21:42

I can remember and I just made the oil

01:21:44

basis and and I froze and he was like I

01:21:48

met you congratulations mate

01:21:51

no [ __ ] no [ __ ] and I was like

01:21:57

I I I I I couldn't even give any words

01:21:59

yellow when I saw my actually I shut my

01:22:02

pants you know because this guy he was

01:22:04

he tried to

01:22:07

my life would have been completely

01:22:10

different I imagine it and you know like

01:22:11

I still get people now they go oh yeah

01:22:14

you ran for me care without paying you

01:22:16

actually I hate sufficient yeah you ran

01:22:19

from a cab you [ __ ] yeah and you're

01:22:22

bloody attacked that Taxi Driver you

01:22:24

know it sounds just like you so what I

01:22:26

say to her

01:22:27

is how you can live and you know who she

01:22:30

was Jared McCracken's [ __ ] Auntie

01:22:34

oh what the hell

01:22:37

no [ __ ] no [ __ ] but so she I don't know

01:22:41

how that woman has lived her life and

01:22:44

being able to look herself in the mirror

01:22:46

when she got up for three trials and

01:22:48

just lied bald-faced just literally said

01:22:52

that something that absolutely didn't

01:22:54

happen happened yeah like what the [ __ ]

01:22:57

who does it yeah how do you sleep at

01:22:59

night who the hell does it and like and

01:23:01

you you'd think I'd have a chip on my

01:23:03

shoulder but I didn't

01:23:06

mean I think we wrecked over the coals I

01:23:10

played my first game for Auckland rugby

01:23:12

against um against Canterbury it was the

01:23:15

rambly shield um record-breaking

01:23:17

performance where I think the Memoir

01:23:19

Canterbury had won 26 anyway we were

01:23:21

going to break it was my first game and

01:23:23

there was a lull on the crowd and this

01:23:25

guy out enjoy it Bridge you'll be in

01:23:27

jail next year because I had like I was

01:23:30

going through the process we were going

01:23:32

for an appeal at you know the next year

01:23:34

so yeah so that's one thing I regret

01:23:36

running from a camera Alpine yeah 100

01:23:39

and like like it was absolutely no

01:23:42

excuse for doing what we did you know I

01:23:44

can remember I I can remember ringing my

01:23:46

mum and this is what I will it's it's

01:23:49

not my mum's fault but

01:23:51

you know like I always say to my

01:23:52

children I've always said to them hey

01:23:54

look I don't care where you are if

01:23:55

you're on the other side of the world if

01:23:56

you're in trouble you call me I will be

01:23:58

there if you lie to me I will kill you I

01:24:01

don't care if you've done something as

01:24:02

long as you tell me the truth yeah but

01:24:04

if you lie we're done do not lie but if

01:24:06

if I can deal with anything I can't deal

01:24:09

with lies if you need me anywhere I'm

01:24:11

going to be there anyway so I can

01:24:12

remember ringing my mum saying hey mum I

01:24:14

mean how can we

01:24:16

can you come and pick us up and she was

01:24:18

like she wasn't very happy about and

01:24:20

she's like no find your own way yeah he

01:24:22

has like 20ks or something yeah yeah

01:24:23

[ __ ] unbelievable do you think um being

01:24:26

an in and out of court for minor things

01:24:27

since the year through your life do you

01:24:29

think um that sort of gave you like a

01:24:31

bit of a maybe a chip on your shoulder

01:24:33

towards the police or authority

01:24:35

definitely didn't like the police yeah

01:24:37

you know like how can you trust them

01:24:39

after that I I couldn't you know like

01:24:40

and and that the whole bureaucracy of

01:24:44

the police and all that stuff like it

01:24:45

was it was disgusting how we were

01:24:47

treated and they knew that they they had

01:24:50

to know we were innocent you know like

01:24:51

they just had to like they'd seen all

01:24:54

the information you know that we hadn't

01:24:56

seen she said that we'd definitely done

01:24:58

it to her before that we'd stolen from

01:25:00

before that we held a night to it before

01:25:01

that we've done all that [ __ ] before

01:25:03

right like what that like you know and

01:25:05

now and they knew that probably no I'd

01:25:08

never met so she'd obviously got the

01:25:10

wrong guys you know so and none of that

01:25:13

[ __ ] had happened to her before anyway

01:25:14

she's full of [ __ ] she's just lying but

01:25:18

anyway and then it was funny I jumped

01:25:20

into a cab I remember I was about 20

01:25:22

years ago probably 25 years ago and I

01:25:24

jumped into a cabin was here

01:25:43

you know but you know when you see when

01:25:45

the when things like that happen you

01:25:47

know like when I've saw a detective

01:25:49

streak again like just I I can remember

01:25:51

just the fear and the you know it's like

01:25:54

seeing a ghost you know because it had

01:25:56

such an impact on my life you know like

01:25:59

we we were I wasn't my family were very

01:26:01

poor well not poor but we were we

01:26:03

certainly didn't have a lot of money and

01:26:06

um you know for my mum and my

01:26:08

grandparents and my uncle to find that

01:26:10

money to you know to to go through a

01:26:12

court case what a stressful thing to go

01:26:14

through oh yeah man and then still be

01:26:16

trying to get ahead in life you know

01:26:18

like a 16 so 16 to 19 you know and

01:26:20

everybody uh formative years and

01:26:22

everybody running around thinking you're

01:26:23

a aggravated robber I mean it's it's

01:26:25

terrible isn't it because there's

01:26:26

nothing you can do about you you know

01:26:28

you know your character and and yeah

01:26:30

your reputation is up to other people

01:26:31

there's nothing you can make nothing

01:26:33

absolutely nothing your life is and and

01:26:36

then you've got you know then oh it's

01:26:39

just real bad because Rob was an awk and

01:26:41

grammar boy and I was a dark boy and I'd

01:26:42

just gone to Auckland grandma that year

01:26:44

our lawyers were my lawyer was Gerard

01:26:48

Curry and he was the guy that defended

01:26:50

Rainbow Warrior agents and he was not

01:26:52

very good and Rob's lawyer was he was a

01:26:55

QC but he wasn't very good and Rob's

01:26:57

lawyers Me Softly spank and in Rob's

01:27:00

lawyer was was a guy that he thought

01:27:03

that I definitely done it because I was

01:27:05

dark and that Rob you know like e short

01:27:08

he didn't do it you know like just all

01:27:10

this sort of [ __ ] you know we're like

01:27:12

hey yeah no it's real bad and but you

01:27:16

know like it's funnier like my mate I

01:27:18

went that way he went that way

01:27:21

yeah what do you mean what did he oh he

01:27:23

he just he just went down a real dark

01:27:25

hole right yeah yeah so it's hard to I

01:27:29

suppose bounce back from something like

01:27:30

that isn't it that's a big that's a big

01:27:32

stressful traumatic thing to go through

01:27:34

yeah it shaped me that's for sure but it

01:27:36

definitely I had definitely not not a

01:27:39

chip on my shoulder but I I it'd be fair

01:27:41

to say that as far as I concerned the

01:27:44

police win you know we're my best

01:27:45

friends yeah oh 100 so and so what were

01:27:48

the other things you're in court for

01:27:49

because I remember there's a clip they

01:27:51

were shown on the news all the time of

01:27:52

you arriving at Gordon like oh that was

01:27:54

so that was for um that was for driving

01:27:57

outside

01:27:59

all restricted hours or something yeah

01:28:01

yeah

01:28:01

that was when Eric Eric Watson was the

01:28:04

side he decided to follow me around New

01:28:06

Zealand and follow you know put a pi on

01:28:08

me and [ __ ] we've talked a lot about

01:28:09

Karma mate and I deserve that you know

01:28:12

100 I deserve that and I tell you what

01:28:15

I'll tell you what this is this and this

01:28:17

is the truth the woman always chooses

01:28:19

always the woman

01:28:21

so this is um Eric Watson he was the

01:28:24

owner of the Warriors yeah worth a

01:28:25

couple hundred million married to Nikki

01:28:27

Watson his wife decided she wanted a

01:28:29

piece of me right right and um and she

01:28:31

just didn't stop yeah and like

01:28:33

admittedly I I should have gone hey and

01:28:36

I did too with Sally at the time no I

01:28:38

left Sally right right

01:28:40

um as soon as soon as that started I

01:28:42

left Sally but you know like I'll make

01:28:44

that that's you know what and for two

01:28:46

years done for two years three years I

01:28:47

lived a lie you know in my way you're

01:28:50

with somebody but but you're not being

01:28:53

honest about it yeah you know like so

01:28:55

so and I always used to say to Nikki at

01:28:57

the time I said you know this is going

01:28:58

to end how it started it's going to end

01:29:00

and lies because it started with

01:29:01

[ __ ] and yeah you know I like it the

01:29:04

more I tried to you know like I'd say to

01:29:07

it I was it was just so bad just like

01:29:09

just just sneaking around and oh she's

01:29:13

still married to Eric at the time no she

01:29:15

did she left the hurricane so you're

01:29:17

sneaking around why because of the like

01:29:18

Paparazzi and media yeah just and just

01:29:21

you know I didn't we didn't want to

01:29:22

embarrass here according like that you

01:29:24

know but just you know like there was a

01:29:26

whole build up whereas he didn't want to

01:29:29

hear the Eric

01:29:30

didn't want to believe that we were

01:29:32

together you know he wanted me to he

01:29:34

wanted to leave his wife and me to move

01:29:35

in with him you know we were real buddy

01:29:37

buddies but yeah yeah it was just like

01:29:39

mate you know I I remember saying to him

01:29:41

should I don't know how he got onto this

01:29:42

but I remember saying to I was like

01:29:45

hey Eric if if you leave Nikki I'm gonna

01:29:48

ask her out and um he was like he lost

01:29:51

it and I was like well

01:29:54

uh and you know I can remember saying to

01:29:57

him I don't want out of the Warriors

01:29:58

because I I had a so I own 25 of the

01:30:01

Warriors and he said why man I said look

01:30:03

because I just went out you know I just

01:30:04

want to do my own thing I was involved

01:30:06

you know I want to start my own

01:30:07

businesses and blah blah blah but I want

01:30:09

it out because you know I was with I was

01:30:11

with Nikki but he he didn't want to know

01:30:14

you know and and he didn't believe it

01:30:16

and then obviously once it all came out

01:30:18

he decided he was just going to make my

01:30:20

life a living hell and and fair enough

01:30:22

you know like fair enough I have no

01:30:24

problem with that but you you say fair

01:30:26

enough but then we talked about the

01:30:28

camera thing before so he he had an

01:30:30

interview and made your life a living

01:30:31

hell and then fast forward down the

01:30:32

track oh and Glenn

01:30:34

for him

01:30:36

I arguably did a better job making his

01:30:39

life out of the way he did to you yeah

01:30:40

you get you you certainly get what you

01:30:42

deserve you know like but but what I

01:30:44

will say that's it's very true like

01:30:47

you know like I should have I should

01:30:49

have been able to say nut I'm like going

01:30:52

down that track you know like there's no

01:30:54

way but that's why I say the woman

01:30:56

always chooses when a woman decides she

01:30:58

wants something it's real I like

01:30:59

especially like she was pretty hot she

01:31:02

was she wasn't yeah and it's the ego

01:31:04

thing we're talking about it's hard yeah

01:31:05

but I mean she just chased and chased

01:31:07

and chased and chased and chased and

01:31:09

chased it was like horrendous

01:31:11

and then like but I got my camera bro

01:31:13

because

01:31:14

um you know we were together and we

01:31:16

bought a house together and I'd move the

01:31:18

appearance on to build a house for

01:31:20

appearance on a place out of cracker

01:31:21

that we had

01:31:22

and um uh she started seeing this guy

01:31:25

Shelton wool right Oh Yeah from blind

01:31:27

spot yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah which was

01:31:29

all cool like I remember like as it was

01:31:33

just because we've been together for

01:31:34

three or four years and I can remember

01:31:35

saying to myself because I wasn't happy

01:31:37

with Nikki you know like it's we just

01:31:38

didn't gel but because I'd

01:31:41

I'd created so much you know torment

01:31:44

with what we did I was like I can't

01:31:47

leave her you know I can't leave you

01:31:49

know like this this is just ridiculous

01:31:51

you know making all the [ __ ] that I've

01:31:53

created to get this spot you're just

01:31:55

gonna have to suck this up Matthew you

01:31:57

know and I and I and I was sucking it up

01:31:59

all the time

01:32:00

she was fine she was running around

01:32:03

behind my back which which was fine but

01:32:05

it just you know when you decide to suck

01:32:07

it up and then that person ends up like

01:32:10

giving it to you so but you know what I

01:32:12

I can remember sitting there and I was

01:32:13

like you know what you deserve

01:32:15

everything you got you know you see

01:32:17

yourself you deserve that yeah like I

01:32:19

deserve it you know like I'm 100 so it

01:32:21

taught me it taught me some very very

01:32:23

good lessons there's no point in

01:32:25

bullshitting lying to speak deceptive

01:32:28

you just got a front up you know like

01:32:31

and it's as hard as it is you know like

01:32:33

we all try to run around trying to

01:32:35

protect people and protect you know like

01:32:37

because we don't want to hurt people but

01:32:38

you know what the worse you just gotta

01:32:41

front up and say hey I'm really sorry I

01:32:44

didn't mean for this to happen but it's

01:32:45

happened you know and and this is where

01:32:48

we're at this is the truth and that's uh

01:32:50

how how long how many years did it take

01:32:53

you to to figure this all out I'm just

01:32:55

thinking this conversation could Fast

01:32:57

Track that fast track that process for a

01:32:59

lot of other oh

01:33:00

yeah yeah for a lot of other people yeah

01:33:02

yeah hey look look the worst thing you

01:33:05

can do in relationship is like this is

01:33:07

how I live my life now right this is how

01:33:09

I live my life now it's like if there's

01:33:12

anything that I'm keeping from my

01:33:13

partner if I can't tell her something

01:33:16

then if I'm lying about something then

01:33:19

it's it's the beginning of the end you

01:33:22

know what I mean as soon as there's a

01:33:24

level of mistrust or you're you're

01:33:26

starting to tell lies in your

01:33:27

relationship then you may as well get

01:33:30

out because it's it's it's over you know

01:33:33

like that's when it just starts going

01:33:34

downhill as soon as you can't if you

01:33:36

can't leave your phone

01:33:38

yeah if you can't leave your keys if

01:33:40

somebody can't call you if you can't

01:33:42

like if you if you if you've got

01:33:43

something to hide you're in the wrong

01:33:45

relationship did you know

01:33:47

that's just my experience like if you're

01:33:51

not if you're doing something that you

01:33:53

shouldn't be doing then you need to ask

01:33:54

yourself the question am I supposed to

01:33:55

be with this person

01:33:57

yeah absolutely do you know what I mean

01:33:59

yeah absolutely what's the point of

01:34:01

[ __ ] what's the point like what's

01:34:02

the point of lying to somebody that's

01:34:04

supposed to be you're supposed to be you

01:34:06

know if she's your wife or your husband

01:34:08

or whatever but you're lying keeping

01:34:10

things from what's the point of that

01:34:11

right why are you doing that yeah you're

01:34:13

with the wrong person

01:34:15

so so that's how I live my life yeah and

01:34:17

what a great way to live your life got

01:34:18

it yeah bullshitting man it's been an

01:34:21

absolute pleasure it seems like you're

01:34:23

in a great place so you're heading off

01:34:25

now you go and pick up your son from

01:34:26

school how old is he uh so uh Lundy's

01:34:29

eleven turning 12. yeah you're right

01:34:31

okay so this is your middle one yeah

01:34:32

yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah brilliant and

01:34:34

you're you're at a place now in your

01:34:36

relationship do you think you can be

01:34:38

more open and honest and vulnerable that

01:34:40

then you've been in any of your previous

01:34:41

100 yeah yeah like uh definitely you

01:34:45

know like you know you know I'm not

01:34:47

saying that I've got a perfect

01:34:48

relationship but don't but but what I do

01:34:50

have is we've got an honest relationship

01:34:52

and you know I think I think Honesty is

01:34:56

probably the most important thing you

01:34:58

can have yeah yeah you know like across

01:35:00

everything you know like business being

01:35:03

honest you know and it's it's it's not

01:35:07

hard to be honest it's actually really

01:35:08

easy because if you're honestly even if

01:35:11

it's hurtful like what can that other

01:35:13

person do you can all you can do is say

01:35:17

hey I'm just being honest yeah what do

01:35:19

you want me to do you want me to lie

01:35:21

I can lie if you want but yeah yeah you

01:35:24

know like but but it but it's actually

01:35:27

we find it really hard to be honest

01:35:29

because we don't like to hurt people and

01:35:31

that's you know we try and tiptoe around

01:35:32

things and go

01:35:34

there's just no point and then you just

01:35:36

in all you do is you start building up

01:35:38

this negative [ __ ] and like yeah you

01:35:40

just don't have I don't have time for

01:35:42

negativity I just want to I can tell

01:35:44

you're in a good place positive yeah um

01:35:46

well thanks for sharing your your wisdom

01:35:48

and there's a there's a lot of a lot of

01:35:50

it learned through the School of Hard

01:35:51

Knocks

01:35:55

and that's better it's been really it's

01:35:57

been really good to um you know it's

01:35:58

been quite uh

01:36:00

yeah it's been actually good to but it's

01:36:03

you know it's just I've just ended up

01:36:06

here because I've ended up here yeah I

01:36:07

feel like we've talked about more of the

01:36:09

bad stuff and the good [ __ ] I mean yeah

01:36:12

all those all that stuff all the stuff

01:36:14

that we've talked about like

01:36:15

professional relation I didn't think

01:36:16

we'd get onto that stuff but all that

01:36:17

stuff it shapes you I'm embarrassed of

01:36:20

some of that stuff and you know I wish

01:36:22

you know like I'd handle myself better

01:36:24

behave better in certain situations but

01:36:26

you know I'm I'm I'm where I am now I'm

01:36:30

at now and and I wouldn't be the person

01:36:32

I am today without all those things that

01:36:33

have that have happened and how's the

01:36:35

how's the future going to look like the

01:36:36

next five or ten years we're going to

01:36:38

see more of you in the public eye you do

01:36:39

the The Grand Design style sure yeah

01:36:41

yeah so I really enjoyed doing that show

01:36:43

it was really cool and it was nice to

01:36:45

you know I wanted to do that show Daryl

01:36:47

McEwen got a hold of me and I went you

01:36:49

know what maybe and I said ah I won't

01:36:52

get funny he said

01:36:54

and I sort of didn't think I said yes so

01:36:57

I'm thinking that it wouldn't get funny

01:36:58

and then it got funny I was like oh

01:36:59

bugger it oh you know I'm back in the

01:37:01

public argument but but I actually

01:37:03

really loved doing the show it was

01:37:05

really cool I made some fantastic people

01:37:07

a film crew were amazing I was way more

01:37:10

patient you know like when I was doing

01:37:12

TV back in the day we were just so

01:37:13

impatient and annoying and you know

01:37:16

different head space yeah different head

01:37:18

pace so so it was real cool so we would

01:37:20

we're filming another one um again this

01:37:23

year so

01:37:24

so that that's been that's been really

01:37:26

good and it's been nice to be able to

01:37:27

show people at different sides me you

01:37:29

know that's what's been cool so people

01:37:31

coming out to me and going wow you know

01:37:33

like it's been really nice for me people

01:37:36

coming up and going hey man really love

01:37:39

your show you know like it's not young

01:37:41

people it's all it's obviously older

01:37:42

people but yeah it's the older people

01:37:44

that had that opinion of me so most

01:37:46

people are coming up are all my age or

01:37:48

older and they're all the people that

01:37:49

would have been forming those opinions

01:37:51

of me when they were watching me on

01:37:52

those TV shows yeah well I mean you have

01:37:54

to grow up don't you like you can't you

01:37:55

can't be 54 and and start losing bets

01:37:58

and putting Mike Alice's on your face no

01:38:00

no no no no like and so I was never

01:38:02

going to do anything like that there's

01:38:04

people going oh you know why don't you

01:38:06

guys get back into game two hours we're

01:38:07

like oh come on don't be stupid you know

01:38:09

it's so past that stuff you're right but

01:38:11

yeah but it was nice just to be able to

01:38:13

do you know something that I I really

01:38:16

enjoy doing which is I I like I could

01:38:18

teach you and I like you know looking at

01:38:20

people's beautiful houses

01:38:21

well yeah and hopefully um seems to

01:38:23

think people listen to this podcast and

01:38:24

go ah okay that's uh that's not the

01:38:27

person I thought that'd be nice you know

01:38:29

like well and like to be honest I don't

01:38:31

care if they don't yeah yeah but but

01:38:33

you're not going to read the comments on

01:38:35

Instagram it's not going to worry me you

01:38:36

know like I'm not going to yell

01:38:37

Americans you know I like it at all you

01:38:39

know like and my son will go you go oh I

01:38:41

did

01:38:42

have you seen this you know get it out I

01:38:44

said they're good or bad he's like oh

01:38:47

don't need to know yeah you know like

01:38:49

anything ignorance is blood yeah he's

01:38:51

like sweet ass he said there's a couple

01:38:52

of good ones in there like read me the

01:38:55

good ones

01:38:56

I loved it and it was actually her mum I

01:38:59

I had no idea how to get hold of you but

01:39:00

I think you'd be a great guest so I

01:39:01

messaged your son Boston yeah on

01:39:03

Instagram yeah and he missed you and I

01:39:05

got a text back and I'm so I'm so

01:39:07

pleased you did yeah no me too me too

01:39:09

Don because you know I've obviously uh I

01:39:11

don't listen to a lot of radio but I

01:39:12

obviously know who you are and I've seen

01:39:14

you running up and down the street at a

01:39:16

million miles an hour I've been very

01:39:17

jealous about how quick he can run and

01:39:19

uh how fit you are well I think over the

01:39:21

years on my radio career I've probably

01:39:22

given you a little bit of [ __ ] about

01:39:23

riding your BMX shoes yeah yeah

01:39:27

um and and it was it was mean and

01:39:29

unnecessary yeah yeah yeah but it's it's

01:39:32

it is what it is you know like and it's

01:39:34

funny yeah like to jump on a BMX and

01:39:36

ride around town

01:39:38

obviously like I was actually courting a

01:39:41

lot of [ __ ] but it was something that I

01:39:43

was I loved doing yeah and obviously

01:39:46

you're not hurting anyway you're not

01:39:47

hurting anybody man I'm riding my bike

01:39:49

like Emily I didn't have a helmet on

01:39:51

because they couldn't be asked but I'm

01:39:53

riding my bike I like being in the sun

01:39:55

and like you know if if I was anywhere

01:39:58

else if I was that nobody would give a

01:39:59

[ __ ] right yeah because it's me

01:40:01

everyone's like oh who the hell does he

01:40:03

think he is well I don't think I'm

01:40:04

anybody I'm just riding my bike yeah but

01:40:07

it's funny I feel like we're gonna point

01:40:08

out where everyone talks about diversity

01:40:10

and acceptance and it's like you you

01:40:12

were hurting nobody yeah

01:40:14

yeah 100 and that's what I'm doing

01:40:16

living my best life brilliant Matthew

01:40:18

Ridge it's been an absolute pleasure

01:40:19

thanks buddy

01:40:20

okay thanks from all the way through

01:40:22

this episode of Runners only with dom

01:40:24

Harvey really hope you enjoyed it at the

01:40:26

risk of sounding like a scratchy record

01:40:28

um a couple of I don't know admin

01:40:30

housekeeping things as I do at the end

01:40:32

of all these things if you do like it

01:40:34

and you can think of someone that might

01:40:36

like it as well please let them know

01:40:38

word of mouth is the most powerful form

01:40:39

of marketing another really effective

01:40:41

way is um sharing it on your social

01:40:43

media channels that's really helpful as

01:40:44

well also wherever you get your podcast

01:40:46

from Spotify Apple whatever please give

01:40:49

it a rating if you like it or even a

01:40:50

review one other thing if you're in

01:40:52

business and you want to advertise this

01:40:54

podcast is growing at rates bigger than

01:40:55

what I ever anticipated considering

01:40:57

we're only like five or six months into

01:40:59

the journey we're currently averaging

01:41:00

about 15 000 downloads a week or 60 000

01:41:03

a month and I'm looking for sponsors and

01:41:05

advertisers to jump on board if that

01:41:07

sounds like you or your business let's

01:41:09

get talking you can email me at

01:41:11

domharveynz gmail.com I'm not gonna lie

01:41:14

a lot of work goes into this probably

01:41:15

more work than what I anticipated like

01:41:18

the amount of hours that have gone on to

01:41:19

it so far this year would put me well

01:41:21

below minimum wage in terms of the money

01:41:24

I've made back it's I mean it's not

01:41:25

about that but ultimately if I can make

01:41:28

enough money off this I can reinvest get

01:41:30

the camera quality better get some stuff

01:41:32

on YouTube and hopefully make this a job

01:41:34

I'm really passionate about what I'm

01:41:36

doing and these conversations I'm having

01:41:37

with amazing new zealanders so I really

01:41:39

really want to make this work so if you

01:41:41

can help in any way if you're a business

01:41:43

owner or you can think of a business

01:41:45

that could benefit by being on this

01:41:47

podcast please let's get talking

01:41:49

domharveynz gmail.com or message me on

01:41:52

Instagram domharvey NZ alright thanks

01:41:55

very much hope to see you next week

Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

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Most emotional

Episode Highlights

Mental Health Matters
Matthew Ridge emphasizes the importance of mental health and staying out of the media.
“It was really good for my mental health.”
@ 02m 42s
October 25, 2022
Becoming an All Black
Making the All Blacks felt like a lifetime ago, but it was a dream come true.
“To be an All Black was every kid's dream.”
@ 18m 41s
October 25, 2022
The Pressure of Fame
High wages brought pressure and jealousy, complicating team dynamics.
“It was just an absolute night, not great for morale.”
@ 20m 56s
October 25, 2022
Social Media's Impact
Reflecting on how social media could have changed the game for athletes.
“I would have been bloody awful.”
@ 33m 06s
October 25, 2022
Tears of Joy
Emotional moments with family can bring tears of joy, not sadness.
“They're not tears of sadness; they're tears of joy.”
@ 37m 51s
October 25, 2022
The Illusion of Social Media
Social media often distorts reality; everyone has their own struggles.
“Just because you've got a trillion dollars, you still have the same problems.”
@ 41m 45s
October 25, 2022
Long Distance Love
A relationship that defied the odds, navigating distance and time apart.
“She tried to forget me, I tried to forget her, just didn’t happen.”
@ 52m 33s
October 25, 2022
The Power of Apology
Understanding the importance of owning your mistakes and saying sorry.
“Sorry is an easy word to say, and it disarms the whole situation.”
@ 01h 08m 34s
October 25, 2022
Living in the Present
Focusing on the here and now can lead to a more fulfilling life.
“You feel way better when you live in the present.”
@ 01h 11m 37s
October 25, 2022
Teaching Values to Children
We need to teach our kids about being good people, not just academics.
“These are the sorts of conversations we need to be having with our children.”
@ 01h 15m 04s
October 25, 2022
Lessons Learned from Relationships
Reflecting on past relationships teaches valuable lessons about honesty and integrity.
“It taught me some very, very good lessons.”
@ 01h 32m 21s
October 25, 2022
The Importance of Honesty
Honesty is crucial in relationships; without it, trust erodes and relationships fail.
“As soon as there’s a level of mistrust, it’s the beginning of the end.”
@ 01h 33m 22s
October 25, 2022

Episode Quotes

If you don’t learn, then you’re not growing.
Matthew Ridge shares awkward story about how he met his wife | Runners Only! Podcast with Dom Harvey
Life's hard enough as it is, just embrace everybody.
Matthew Ridge shares awkward story about how he met his wife | Runners Only! Podcast with Dom Harvey
You still want to be loved, cared for, and respected.
Matthew Ridge shares awkward story about how he met his wife | Runners Only! Podcast with Dom Harvey
We just had amazing chemistry.
Matthew Ridge shares awkward story about how he met his wife | Runners Only! Podcast with Dom Harvey
You reap what you sow.
Matthew Ridge shares awkward story about how he met his wife | Runners Only! Podcast with Dom Harvey
Honesty is probably the most important thing you can have.
Matthew Ridge shares awkward story about how he met his wife | Runners Only! Podcast with Dom Harvey

Key Moments

Living in the Moment34:16
Emotional Reflections36:57
Mental Health Tools42:18
Social Media Reality43:16
Unexpected Reunion52:05
TV Show Success56:47
Friendship Dynamics59:10
Impact of Lies1:22:46

Words per Minute Over Time

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New Zealand journalism legend Guyon Espiner || Runners Only! Podcast with Dom Harvey

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