00:00:00
[Music] by the way I just want to say I can't
00:00:06
tell you many many people come up to me and they go you know Dana and Spate
00:00:12
they're always talking about you on their podcast yeah it's
00:00:18
called it's an omage or the omo why do you talk about me so much I don't know
00:00:23
why you think we do you that's ridiculous no it isn't everyone just
00:00:29
says it [Music]
00:00:34
I like to be sort of real but I don't want to be totally real so I want I'll definitely I'll definitely be getting a
00:00:41
if we ever take a week off I got a full face leftt from head to toe and I'm just I'm I'm covered in a
00:00:48
body bruise just my whole body's Bru aren't we just puffy clowns I me did red buttons every get a facelift I don't
00:00:54
know I know we're supposed to be gross I think I think we're just little clowns I mean just sit Caesar or ever get a lip T
00:01:01
you know everyone's supposed to be good looking everyone there's no I mean you know my dry cleaner has a head shot it's
00:01:07
like you never know like they discover me your hair's really
00:01:13
like Jody Foster talking about good work I always
00:01:19
say who had good work Jody Foster she looks great no I don't think she did anything and she does look great I I
00:01:25
have a question for you because we have a guest we're gonna we don't ever have a guest we're gonna have it so we're teasing it but let's first get to I know
00:01:32
we talked about something before we came on that I want to see and then we'll
00:01:37
talk to the city this um I read I think it's true I
00:01:42
talked to other people that if Trump I talked to people if Trump I talked to
00:01:48
other people to was that a fake news that's a good sources yeah that's good I talked to other people that if Trump
00:01:55
goes to prison the secret service is going with him because every ex-president has 24 round clock Secret
00:02:00
Service guys so so Trump going to prison with the Secret Service uh this my take
00:02:07
on it oh look man we got ourselves we got ourselves a new [ __ ] what's your
00:02:12
name hey my name is Donald jrum president of the United States he thinks
00:02:18
he's a sorry didn't switch he thinks he's the president man hey look at you
00:02:23
you fat man and orange what do you eat all the time man how do you get big and fat and orange like that I eat cheese
00:02:30
Burgers I eat salads very rarely and I eat a lot of snow cones snow cones don't
00:02:37
hey I like he's proud of being fat so far okay go ahead snow cones is a funny word I eat snow cones chicken
00:02:43
cheeseburgers and SNES anyway hey what's with the guys in the suits this a secret service they're
00:02:49
Swan to protect me they're Swan to protect me and they got weapons like you wouldn't believe they're coming to
00:02:55
prison with me and they're bringing the guns they're bringing their ues they got rocket launchers on their back back they
00:03:00
got dynamite in their pants if you touch me you're done oh oh it looks like I'm
00:03:06
the [ __ ] now don't worry I love the Hispanics I've always loved the Hispanics and they love
00:03:14
me it's a little sloppy hey can I borrow a Dilly bar now if I can't do it with a
00:03:21
Latino accent I'd have to do kind of hey look man we got a little [ __ ] here hey
00:03:26
what's up with you you're fat morning what the [ __ ] you eat Latino Works um I was going to do the
00:03:34
twist at the end like I don't really talk like this I'm actually from Ireland and I came here and I committed a crime
00:03:40
I sent into prison so I took out a Persona to protect myself so sometimes I talk like this but really this is how I
00:03:46
actually talk hey Trump hey Trump hey Trump you got a big
00:03:51
rump hey Trump you got a big rump and you stunk Trump you're fatten round in
00:03:57
Orange what's going on homie I like they let you bring a machete in
00:04:02
here that's the Secret Service will bring all kinds of weapons like you guys have chains machetes and you know Iron
00:04:09
Fists whatever they call them knuckles and all those things brass knuckles they'll hit you so hard to be crying all
00:04:16
the way down let me tell you You' be like a girman a little tiny girman from Hans and France
00:04:21
standing you might want to sit next to me in the cafeteria yeah if you if you tip over my
00:04:28
mashed potatoes the secret service will be like white on race is going to take you down hey man why is your voice so
00:04:35
rough all the time I don't know be nice I might give you my fudal uh that's if Trump goes to prison
00:04:42
now if Biden goes to prison hey who says we're in prison it's all
00:04:48
just subjective okay he but he would be he would be shadowed by corn poop or at
00:04:53
least he could say corn poop's in here with me and so you don't want to mess with me because Corn Pop yeah I wanted
00:04:59
to do a little little Trump this week next week next week it's going to be a
00:05:04
back to Biden and then maybe I'll do um I don't know Bobby Kennedy Jr people ask
00:05:11
me but I don't it's very difficult well we've got a guest a buddy of ours wants
00:05:16
to jump on with us and we can read the headlines and he'll just read them with us and we'll just talk about an an
00:05:23
stupid [ __ ] is this a mystery guess let's pretend it's a you have to guess him oh whoops well that was a mystery
00:05:29
tower Tower one come in we need to make a landing he's asleep his eyes open are
00:05:36
he look at Air Force controller I mean with those headphones he told me to wear
00:05:41
headphones for God's sake wait a minute is this John Lovitz John are you in the incredible
00:05:48
shrink man you're welcome you want me to play Bill Burr
00:05:54
and you play John El hey John your head's like a tomato can you know that
00:06:00
thing was hysterical what's the deal with Pickles we text each other like that and I said we should do that as
00:06:05
like a on your podcast so he did right that's he goes just say anything I went
00:06:13
okay and you gave it to him with both barrels he's not worried about getting cancelled hey it's Jerry the dog hello
00:06:20
Jerry Jerry and I are sort of on hot and cold with each other Jerry does Jerry
00:06:26
remember me or is he playing hard he remember he remembers you wait let me see Jerry's not so thirsty to be on
00:06:33
camera J it remember this is what we do when we were on on stage at SNL we'd see
00:06:38
each other in the monitor remember uhhuh oh just go chin up kind of
00:06:45
thing well we were only in our 30s then we didn't really have to keep our chin up looking at each other like we're yeah
00:06:52
it's overhead light it looks like I'm completely ball that's why I'm wearing a hat no that's good that hat has Arizona
00:06:58
on it yeah because you have Arizona sorry yeah the wi when I was there with you oh that's Nevada okay and you got
00:07:06
like flying saucer teacups over your ears and a blue cap so at first I was like I don't have to wear them no no
00:07:12
they just they don't wear them he just cut out well why aren't you wearing them the podcast I've got these little ones
00:07:18
that fit in you know this like this like you know yeah I have ones like that except mine are expensive they're great
00:07:24
John you probably have better you have great sound are you I I have a shirt like that except mine's expensive I had
00:07:31
a shirt like that once but then my mom got a job what a [ __ ] burn oh you are wearing headon a Wayne's World a Wayne's
00:07:39
World line John we're gonna throw up a few stories and you just chime in this we're gonna make fun of whatever's going
00:07:44
on in the world okay okay hit it fellas oh it's on my screen yes okay this is a
00:07:52
new read read it David Heather my birthday's coming up um PE stain jeans
00:08:00
style come with a big price tag and it's already sold out so you can buy jeans that look like you peeed in them is this
00:08:06
from the Billy Madison Collection look at how funny this is are you gonna wear these that guy looks super cool he's a
00:08:12
DJ I think at Coachella I would buy him for a friend for Dana and you is a joke
00:08:18
right well well they have another one I think it's called the John L Connection in the back yeah I was going to say
00:08:24
fudge sickle The Motif I wanted to make you happy John it's a melted fudge in
00:08:29
your pocket it's called poop pans and they just sort of have a brown stain in the back and apparently they're going
00:08:35
off the charts they got they're Nordstroms well mine has a little airbag in it so when you kick the guy it
00:08:42
goes what happens oh and farts yeah I like these you gotta be kind of
00:08:49
skinny to wear pea pants is this even real I think it's
00:08:55
real I'm calling I'm calling I'm calling [ __ ] on that I don't think go to our YouTube and give us facts and figures
00:09:02
because I like to look at the comments they're actually very nice sometimes some of our fans are nice actually
00:09:08
actually I'm shocked how why would you want to wear jeans where it looks like okay
00:09:13
um they were on the runway in Milan Heather said well it's kind of like the
00:09:18
first time crazy John love its where were you when you first saw someone with torn jeans you go yeah this is just the
00:09:27
what do we do now we've torn them up yeah never seeing that I go I go I'd throw them
00:09:32
out and then you'd throw up I do you grow
00:09:39
up I like shirts that are a little beat up I like old sweatshirts and then when
00:09:44
you started selling them looking old I thought it was ridiculous but I kind of like it it saves me a 100 washes you
00:09:50
know yeah I'm always in I'm always down at the launder man you're you're trying to save water and conserve on water you
00:09:56
know John when we were all three at SNL at the same time the hardest day was the day off was
00:10:02
Sunday and I would go in you'd have to go to the basement of my boiling hot
00:10:08
apartment building and then I'd have to buy like $100 and quarters and go down there and
00:10:14
do that's the fun part I pa John I paid John on the side to take my laundry and do it bring it back and I was very
00:10:21
grateful and I was generous with my payments remember John you do my laundry yeah I remember that that was cool of You by the way I just want to say I
00:10:28
can't tell you many many people come up to me and they go you know Dana and John
00:10:34
I mean Dana and is Spade they're always talking about you on their podcast yeah
00:10:40
it's called yeah it's an omage or the omo why
00:10:45
do you talk about me so much well would you come up because you're funny and interesting voice Dennis Miller comes up
00:10:52
because You' think of his tag you know okay you got the love man on with
00:10:59
Dixie cup phone things and the Mariners hat okay I don't have the inside the ear
00:11:05
headphones B what was that on the five racket what am I gleo what's my
00:11:13
insurance Geo I don't know why you think we do you that's ridiculous no it isn't
00:11:20
everyone says it you're doing may West no I'm
00:11:27
not May West hey w why you come up and see me something come up and see me
00:11:33
something come and see me God it is jeez I just put that together May why don't
00:11:38
you come up and see me no you know who I really sound like is a Wimpy from popey it really me I'd gladly pay you Tuesday
00:11:47
hamburger day yeah that's you're better than wimpy that was good I no I love uh
00:11:55
what's the next story and then we'll talk more about about underwear and then my hair let's see if we can
00:12:02
Elevate the podcast okay here we go oh Sophia Bush says she's in a relationship
00:12:07
now I I just thought in my opinion this is not important but it when an actress
00:12:15
uh if an actress is gay it's okay to keep that to yourself I think the idea is we're all equal and being gay is
00:12:22
nothing different from anyone else which it isn't and it's not a problem but it always feels like a press release is
00:12:27
necessary and I don't know how to react to it like oh good or oh okay or it's the shoulder shrugger but they seem to
00:12:34
always have to come out and say uh well it's kind of like we did John came out
00:12:39
with an article saying he was heterosexual I mean would that be news or well that was because there was so
00:12:44
many Whispers John what is US wnt United
00:12:52
States women's women soccer no retired soccer player oh
00:12:59
wait US Women's National Team MH oh I don't know I look at this F
00:13:06
picture and then I'm like well why what are they showing F why don't they show some
00:13:12
video okay that's enough of the two of them together that's what I want to see because I'm just picturing it in my
00:13:19
head I thought it was her with a haircut on I'm not even joking I thought it here's is Sophia Bush is she related to
00:13:26
George Bush I think she or is it is it a different
00:13:32
Bush Dana why does it just say Bush likes Bush I like the pain article a lot
00:13:38
and this one too I think we're two for two okay I'm just throwing things out there you're right it's just like it's a
00:13:45
what do you call it a nothing Burger it's very normal so each his own so it shouldn't be a press relas why doesn't
00:13:51
it just say bush is into bush Okay well
00:13:56
we stumbl into that and is being full I love it I like
00:14:02
it don't hold back oh she's no relation to George we heard okay I didn't think
00:14:07
so this is a this is is gonna bother John would you pay 44% Capital against
00:14:16
John no it complet it would kill the economy it completely defeats defeats
00:14:22
the idea of why people want to buy a house and hang on to it for a long time their house goes up in value and now
00:14:29
he's taking almost half of the gains away what does that do 133% if you live
00:14:37
in California so you would get up to like 57% come on it's time for the people
00:14:43
Amer to pay a fair share shff sherff Sharon Stones pilot Flint Stones Barney
00:14:50
Rubble Rubble Dresden I think it would make the housing market crash wouldn't it well I
00:14:57
think it it it it what it does it is more money uh on the surface that would
00:15:03
come into the country and immediately go out but also it's it it it lessens your
00:15:09
drive to invest because investing is already a gamble so let's say you lose money you lose let's say you actually do
00:15:15
well and you make money then you have to give halfway what happens is people stop
00:15:21
investing as much someone like me like they put tax on houses in in California
00:15:26
and LA County so I won't buy another I was going to say the with the property taxes when you buy a house so less
00:15:34
people buy homes that's less property tax so it's well historically in the
00:15:40
late 90s that happens is Clinton got together with the Republicans and lowered the capital gains tax and the
00:15:48
government actually took in more Revenue so yeah there's a lot of inputs to this
00:15:53
this tax through property tax probably right and through motivation to get in the stock market and invest because if
00:15:59
you wi you might make money more people pay tax I wasn't even thinking thinking
00:16:04
about the stock market yeah you you Animal Spirits unless we want to be what
00:16:11
you know some kind of social welfare state I don't know it's a problem John you don't think okay next
00:16:18
one dare how dare I I eat joh who's gonna listen to Three comedians about
00:16:24
about no that's why nobody that's why we're moving on this is I thought was interesting now without
00:16:31
knowing music attach Dan is that you without knowing this this was just
00:16:38
sort of interesting that just how fast animals are and I had no idea which ones
00:16:43
are fast and slow so just talk along with it if one of them seems okay fast and surprised you said okay here we go
00:16:49
okay is that Dana okay turn that down a little bit okay that's a cat a cat goes 48
00:16:58
that's sop a bush and her girlfriend a fox what's that ostrich ostriches are
00:17:05
really fast well that's a wolf look at their little legs and they all love AC a wolf a
00:17:11
peacock and an ostrich oh the Rhino how fast is that Rino 55 55 miles per hour I
00:17:19
have no idea I thought they were slower okay keep going what's that an elk antalope and a
00:17:26
what a and a Buffalo goes 56 miles an hour bear oh
00:17:32
they could [ __ ] haul that's as fast as I go that would be tough to out run
00:17:37
them okay I cheetah can go 85 miles no look at the
00:17:43
wolf who the [ __ ] had their money on the wolf no the cheatah is faster oh and who
00:17:49
are these guys I don't even think these are real animals I think this is animated is this Jurassic Park
00:17:57
it's where are they going that's the big question they're coming back how dumb how long can
00:18:05
they who this oh a giraffe wait wait wait wait wait wait not a giraffe tiger
00:18:11
6 a camel 65 miles an hour get [ __ ] no way
00:18:17
I for that look at their homes look at the zebra
00:18:22
[Music]
00:18:30
listen Dana I just wanted to tell you that the eclipse not really coming to La when
00:18:35
everyone was so excited about it like it was Coachella was funny you know what's not funny getting ripped off Harry's
00:18:42
Razors agrees Harry's razor something my brother Andy told me about years ago
00:18:47
what they did they saw customers getting screwed over by questionable overpriced shaving products and they decided to do
00:18:54
something better yeah I hear David that instead of charging the same stupid high
00:19:01
prices Harry's found their own way to make really honestly beautifully designed razors for a fraction y do you
00:19:08
know what that means a fraction of the price L gr less exactly exceptional
00:19:14
products honest prices that's Harry's David oh yeah listen you know they're
00:19:19
heavy they have a weighted handle so Dana and I know you like to get pumped up you you count on them as barbells
00:19:26
because you go oh I do two razors in the morning do curls you know yes I take the
00:19:31
Raza and they pump up the bicep but you used to you used to do 300 pounds yeah
00:19:37
but you know you just do more reps it's all about that's more reps
00:19:43
yeah no it's great to have a real this is like stuff in movies you'd see a guy with a really handle and a weighted
00:19:50
heavy shaver and then these other companies came out with these plastic
00:19:55
ones garbage that just after one shave you know I'm sort of an alpha male in a
00:20:00
way so it's just it I can hear it say ow when I go down you look at how wide they are with between blades you're like this
00:20:07
is going to rip my face so after one shave just get the blood off it throw it
00:20:13
away uh but but the ones the heavy ones look cooler you look like you're in a movie I like it it's quality makes you
00:20:21
feel good um better than the rest listen it's got the highest customer
00:20:26
satisfaction in the shave industry mhm yeah no risk trial you don't like it for
00:20:31
some weird reason mhm no worries it's on them convenient subscription option that you can
00:20:37
cancel at any time this is a great great shaving experience D getting ripped off
00:20:43
isn't funny switch to hares get started with a $13 trial set for just $3 at harry's.com
00:20:49
fly that's harry's.com Fly for a $3 trial set Dana running like a little
00:20:57
[ __ ] cat when they used to say you run like a
00:21:03
puss is that what they meant yep okay here's a news flash though what animal
00:21:08
can run the longest what does that mean oh like a marathon a human being a human being
00:21:16
we'd go with our Spears we'd hit the animal the animal would only be hurt and start to get away and we could chase them for 12 14 hours just running is
00:21:23
that true yep human beings are really uh great at longdistance running compared
00:21:28
to other mammals how fast do you think you can run Dana um 41 miles an hour no
00:21:34
in my Prime yeah what did you do the mile the mile about
00:21:40
425 really okay okay well we trained a lot and there's a lot of people faster
00:21:46
than that I could train for my lifetime I I'll train I'll train your head in it
00:21:52
a minute what about how fast you go do you go 20 miles an hour I'm not sure how it
00:21:59
equivocates I think human beings top out at like 28 if you're like you know who's
00:22:05
saying bolt John's John's big bragging I heard him the other day bragging to the waiters at dinner that he got
00:22:11
um 640 steps that day and then he showed her CL through this screen to rip your
00:22:19
head off I'll clim to this goddamn
00:22:25
screen all right we'll watch this faster now tennis I playit wait bastard that's
00:22:30
true you are quick side to side this is an old commercial right from the uh 90s
00:22:35
okay yeah this is a '90s Instagram this is is that Dana in the middle let me
00:22:43
see flirt squirt where did this
00:22:53
go sh and a song change my mind oh my God
00:23:00
she spitting her mouth so [ __ ]
00:23:06
loud Che out flirt squirt they're awfully young to be flirting and
00:23:12
squirting oh that's Heather says that leads to first base but I think that's
00:23:19
fourth he just me John say this oh he did yeah why are you focusing on flirt
00:23:27
squirt a flirting and squirting no thank you okay
00:23:32
that's a comment awfully young be flirting squirting awfully young to be wearing a bowler hat that idiot in the middle but fine I think that one kid was
00:23:39
Ryan Gosling as a kid wasn't it I think it was really one of them was Reese Witherspoon at the end with the glasses
00:23:45
the thing they don't tell you is this is a precursor because if you aim low you get pee pants oh yeah that's true that's
00:23:52
good you tied it up because flirt squirt is basically you pee in the other guy's mouth and it's a little bit beyond
00:23:59
flirting it's like oh hey I think Jenny likes me she has peed in my face not you
00:24:06
little no yeah no I wouldn't even don't try to church you and your fantasies
00:24:11
flirt squirt Jerry come you know I'm so old I didn't know any girls that
00:24:17
squirted in my life and now there's too many isn't that funny do they learn it along the way do they I've never been
00:24:23
with Cordon you have one no I've never been with Mor let's look at a clip
00:24:29
squirted oh really well maybe you're not Mr Romeo or maybe I'm
00:24:37
picky no if you push right here and also squeeze their big toe it can work it's
00:24:43
hard to do though you get one F right right in the grill and where does it where do they spt that thing it can go
00:24:51
up to 6 to eight feet FLT squirt all right read what d
00:24:59
back on that Dana don't jump out on flirt squirt no no I I don't I have no we got a young
00:25:04
audience that wants to hear about it Dana told me he would flirt squirt with Nora
00:25:10
Dunn where between on SNL I don't know when he just wouldn't
00:25:17
do it they were they were arguing in the hallway one day on SNL and and I thought
00:25:22
it was about sketches no it was about and then you heard the flirt squirt song no then they were like yes squirt you
00:25:29
promis to squirt me in the middle of the sketch I tried I tried the truth of it
00:25:34
is funnier John and I were in a sketch of William Shatner and we were playing Star Trek nerds it's kind of a famous
00:25:40
sketch famous sketch oh yeah William Shatner goes get a life you know so and then nor and I just had an argument
00:25:47
whatever but I had like I was dressed like the nerd and I had glasses with you know tape in the middle and John came we
00:25:55
nose to nose kind of yell and you know there's a lot of stress I was dying laughing yeah it's hard to get in a real
00:26:03
argument when you're dressed as the church lady like you get the [ __ ] take a swing at somewh could you tell that that
00:26:09
was a really funny sketch all week because it's lived throughout history is a really good one oh yeah everything
00:26:15
about William Shatner was just funny that week and they he just killed it he
00:26:21
so so fun we were the most excited about him hosting than anybody because like Dennis would always say why aren't I in
00:26:27
sketches and he complain I go Dennis you don't hang out Tuesday night right so then he'd be around the table and he'd
00:26:33
always be like because no what there was nothing for him to do but when it was
00:26:39
and I remember this distinctly and there's William Shatner and um well Lauren's in the middle and then
00:26:46
the host and then the ne the table goes this way so I always sat next to the host and Dana was on my right and I
00:26:52
remember looking at saying to Dan I go it's Kirk we were so excited and I looked at
00:26:58
Dennis he's like this yeah he was so excited well we all
00:27:04
were excited it was Kirk Captain Kirk when they walk down to lunch or they walk down to huxley's or something and
00:27:11
but they were like let's say out outside of 30 Rock they're just walking on the street to go to dinner whatever and he
00:27:17
said so many people yell Captain Kirk and while he's talking he just throws this up yeah anyway Dennis so we we golf
00:27:24
last week hey oh we can do that and he would throw it out like cuz that's all they want to see us say but then we
00:27:30
asked SW Shatner and he said I don't remember that he said I can't remember
00:27:36
you remember doing this to people well Dennis said he's just throwing it around just while he's talking because he does
00:27:41
so much it's like fluid which is funny and um remember the episode where Spock
00:27:47
got mad and did this to a klling on no he did not did
00:27:54
he remember they they made Spock because he didn't have any motions they made him we PE pants around the I knew you were
00:27:59
going for that I I knew it I had to the station cuz he has no emotion he goes why is this humorous they're [ __ ] pee
00:28:06
pants dude it's funny remember he fell in love with somebody he didn't understand the motion and then
00:28:11
he that's you and then he did a flirt squirt by some Kling on trouble with the
00:28:18
trip with the tribles remember it was a fam episode no man was gone before okay
00:28:23
Dana was in the middle of a cur interrupted I was just squirt and flirt like squirt in my
00:28:32
face John where what couch are you you in lascala what are you doing right now it's in my house it is you didn't do
00:28:41
that design on purpose did you I did back then I know a great lawyer look like you're at a Persian I
00:28:49
went with a Southwestern theme and it was like 30 years ago there you go I
00:28:54
have to say John is a big mansion good luck your Mansion tax a
00:29:00
mansion your house is your house is twice as big as mine it's twice as
00:29:07
Southwestern you want to talk about personal stuff like our home no John I don't I don't want to do this and yet
00:29:12
you brought it up no John when are you go on the road next and do you like the road and if you travel past Texas do you
00:29:20
go the day before go I go normally about once or twice a
00:29:27
month and uh yeah I do like it but I always go the fly the day before the show because you never know what if you
00:29:33
miss it so I I'd rather have peace of mind and get a good days as even if it's Vegas sleep before the show even if it's
00:29:40
Vegas even if it's Phoenix even if it's Phoenix I don't care where I go the day
00:29:46
before and I get all because I don't want to I don't want something to happen and then I miss miss no it's so
00:29:51
stressful right so you go to the Hollywood improv the day before Hollywood improv you hang on out the
00:29:58
Hollywood improv the day before no I don't play La anymore because oh yeah I
00:30:03
hear this theorem well Comics still jokes for one yeah my jokes are that good and secondly you know you never
00:30:11
know they film me go oh you said this you said this it was a joke yeah but you meant it even though it was a joke I go
00:30:18
well I meant it yeah but it was a joke who are these people yeah who are these people who are these people they're
00:30:24
looking to end your career and I it's not worth the CH you know chance well I think you could go on they might laugh
00:30:29
and they might be offended and if they're offended you go so what but what oh right you're saying Hollywood audiences are a little more offended
00:30:36
some of your offensive little there's always somebody well guess what Steve Martin guess what in his book like he
00:30:43
stayed out of La completely he went on the road he opened for people he did Vegas he did other he did a lot of
00:30:48
things and uh he became great so there's more than one way to skin a Steve yeah
00:30:55
why did he stay out of Los Angeles um well I think he saw that the sitcom
00:31:00
way and that wasn't his way so then he started opening and just working on the road um two weeks before he made it he
00:31:07
bombed so bad he considered just forget it because naked moment I can't remember
00:31:13
you know I don't know I just remember in his book he was playing some Miami gig and just if the audience didn't hook he
00:31:20
wasn't famous if they didn't hook his character it got really Grim in there you know well he was making fun of it I
00:31:28
know he was deep and if you didn't get that it was bad but if you did it was I mean he was hysterical hysterical I saw
00:31:34
him at Peak at the in at the boarding house and also saw him at the Berkeley
00:31:40
Community Center yeah it was pretty something to watch that what about when he when he had the Blues Brothers open
00:31:45
for him at the universal Ampitheater that's probably the coolest show I've ever missed I even Steve I it's hard it man
00:31:54
that'd be one of the toughest things to follow probably BL Brothers when they're the full dancing and all the singing
00:32:01
yeah that's aian AA doing anything and then yeah and you're even better yeah but he was on SNL then too so it was
00:32:07
like he was on a lot yeah he was on a lot right right Steve Martin was you know a rockar as well I got to work with
00:32:14
him in a movie of Three Amigos Phil Hartman and I right and Joe mono were in the scene and and uh and so they was
00:32:22
doing coverage on Steve Martin it was you know Chevy Chase and Martin so anyway they're on Steve so he would do a
00:32:29
take they go let's do it again and each time he was a little funnier and I've never seen anything like it he had such
00:32:35
control and it was like he had a knob on his chest they go where do you want to hear like let me turn it up one let me
00:32:42
turn it up two little funnier okay we'll go to three it was like that precise
00:32:47
I've never seen anything like it Incredible You Lie a lot but that one I
00:32:53
I mean he's not he's not Dana Carvey well I remember working ATA paradise and
00:32:58
I would watch it and everyone it's John's closeup and it would just it would be exactly the same every time I
00:33:03
mean I I have a knob on me that says 11 and it and it's broken off there so it
00:33:11
doesn't go below I've done movies with both of you guys and I have to say between the two
00:33:17
of you I'm the funniest okay thank you thank you for that audience pull no I
00:33:24
mean wait oh that's no you are funny you're you're you're I didn't mean to say I'm the funny no it between two of you I'm funny but
00:33:32
it drives you crazy I came out of wrong again people go well you're just naturally funny that's what they say to
00:33:37
you yeah they say that to me and I go I work my ass off on it no it's not that I
00:33:44
act like I don't know I'm being funny but I do know yeah and I know how I'm funny no no one can just be a natural
00:33:51
and not work the system of how to be funny on command with a camera in your face no this guy named Ralph Levy who
00:33:57
used to produc and direct The Jack Benny show and the Burns and Allen Show he came to my acting class Tony BAU acting
00:34:04
for the came Ralph's going to teach you comedy but anyway Ralph said you do all the things you do in drama then you had
00:34:10
the comedy on top and then you the actor you know you're being funny but your character should be
00:34:16
oblivious as a result people think oh you're just naturally funny you're funny
00:34:21
just standing there I said if I'm just standing there it's because I'm making
00:34:27
that choice to just stand there with the blank face because I know it'll be funny because that's the funny way to do it
00:34:33
yeah could I get a master thespian a TI i n g with full
00:34:39
commitment acting said said Thank
00:34:45
you thank you thank
00:34:50
you that's okay that a good laugh no on SNL though they break so much now I go
00:34:56
what happened to the sketch and so you know remember D we weren't allowed to break character we' have been fire yeah
00:35:03
this isn't the Carol Bernett ship we have do that Ryan Gosling though was having so much fun it was infectious
00:35:09
that was the most Breaky show ever but you couldn't help but uh laugh well he's the host he's not going to get fired
00:35:16
yeah but it was it was oh I guess I have to go back to my giant movie career I don't think he's worried about the beus
00:35:22
and buad sketch it's kind of a sort of a classic you saw it didn't saw it I saw it get very funny and so I mean it would
00:35:30
have been funnier if they hadn't broke I mean that's how I feel oh it wasn't I
00:35:35
wish we could have broke I think breaking some I I agree with you when I was doing the pepper boy I thought we were going to break for a minute and I
00:35:42
didn't want to break on that because it was killing so hard without it but it does make you laugh when people break
00:35:48
but anyway here's my impression of farling that why thank you
00:35:54
peer I would like more pepp he really made down by the river it was
00:36:00
you and Christina and you guys were trying not to laugh and it was he was doing everything he could to make you
00:36:07
laugh which was that funny but it was did you ever laugh your whole time at SNL or did anyone ever laugh no I did
00:36:13
one time because it was a it was it was Tarzan Tanto and
00:36:19
Frankenstein the pat Stevens show with Nora so she's interviewing the three of us and any we're doing the sketch and
00:36:26
then all of a sudden Phil out of nowhere started laughing oh yeah
00:36:31
yeah that's very odd and then 5 seconds later he just lost it that was it yeah
00:36:38
laughing on and on and I'm like we're all like what is he laughing and then we couldn't not laugh and I have my head
00:36:44
I'm like there's covering my face we were like and I couldn't stop and I afterward I said Phil what happened
00:36:51
because nothing had happened he just started he so he said I tell you what he
00:36:57
said say well I just thought how ridiculous I
00:37:02
look and and I started laughing and then I stopped and he goes and then I thought
00:37:07
what did what that must have looked like to the people watching the sketch and at home seeing Frankenstein laugh like that
00:37:15
and he goes then I just lost him for no reason yeah yeah and then Lauren on Monday goes well you know that happens
00:37:20
it's all right you know oh man the other thing John is the sketch continued even though they lost it if I remember him as
00:37:27
Frank Stein crashing through the set cuz that's what do that and he's laughing
00:37:32
his ass off the whole time he's still doing the character yeah yeah yeah I
00:37:37
think I remember that we tried yeah we tried to finish but we couldn't stop but that's the only time I remember doing
00:37:43
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unnecessary medical exams I like that I do have life insurance Dana and I'm glad I do uh am I
00:38:55
the one who would beneficiary yeah if anything happens split between Sandler
00:39:00
gets the most cuz he needs it oh thank you so much thank you Davis
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they're gonna love this I give it to Rob Schneider too hey thanks give me more what no it this what policy genius does
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at this but some people just do a skim job but you need them to vet this stuff
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yes why yeah this is a great product this is a great thing to have poliy genius gives you an unbiased advice from
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00:40:38
for John before we let him go walk Jerry what do you have your own show now suddenly it's your podcast no I'm
00:40:46
just saying because we're getting a we have a screen joh we'll be right back with Dana we are here with John love
00:40:53
right after this we are here with the one and only John lovit word from Snapple thanks fellas John do you want
00:41:00
to promote you promote your gigs your next one I'll be at the Grove comedy club in
00:41:07
May in Arkansas and uh look for me I have a new singing show where I sing uh
00:41:13
with a great band Randy who played with Frank Sinatra four-piece band at the Jazz Club
00:41:19
vid where is that it's in Los Angeles top of Beverly Beverly Glen Center and
00:41:25
I'm there oh up in there okay and they want to bring me back now every couple of months it was a blast I saw it
00:41:31
D well you do have pipes what are you singing Sinatra stuff yeah stuff like that
00:41:36
different standards and fun songs and songs like the monkey in the Babbling
00:41:41
that my grandfather taught me when I was sing in the rain though it's still funny well he does comedy I do comedy yes it's
00:41:48
still a funny show he does have a good voice it's not Dana SP funny but it's it's not me on my
00:41:55
pogo stick no it's not Dana George Bush Dennis
00:42:02
Miller I'm doing a tour of the South by the way funny love I'm doing that's a great question
00:42:08
love it I'm doing I thought you went already well it's on david.com but I'm doing like U I think I'm doing Arkansas
00:42:14
Kentucky North Carolina uh Orlando I'm doing Arkansas
00:42:20
me me me did you guys ever talk about when
00:42:26
Dana Harvey brought me to a club he goes there's this guy there David Spade he's
00:42:32
Den he's really influenced by Dennis and I and that's the first time I saw David and then I was like oh my God he's like
00:42:38
a like a clone of the two of if Dana and David Dennis Miller and Dana Carvey had
00:42:44
a baby it would be Spade I think he's out stripped
00:42:50
that years ago you have your own style now but back then it was like but you were funny but that's the first time I
00:42:55
ever saw you introduce me to you when I first saw Dennis he said this guy John
00:43:02
is AC cross between me and a snuffle up when I first saw David um D I said I
00:43:11
watched him and I said he's like a cross between Dennis Miller and a flirt
00:43:18
squirt when I first saw John Lovitz I thought he was a cross between Mo Howard
00:43:23
and ulyses S Grant yeah when I first saw Dana Carvey
00:43:29
I thought he was Ellen degenerous I first saw Dana he was
00:43:35
across between Tinkerbell just Tinkerbell I can't think of another one
00:43:41
this is a true story Dana would we'd always tease each other and he would do characters and oh the start when C when
00:43:49
when William Shatner host to the show and he John I'm mean three sketches
00:43:55
three three right and he always goes what can't I do so one time he's behind
00:44:01
me dressed and makeup as Johnny Carson and he's imitating Johnny Carson it was
00:44:08
so spookily good Dana was gone and you in the room with Johnny Caron and I
00:44:14
remember in my head looking at it and I literally thought yeah he's right what can't he do
00:44:21
that's how good he was how great he was I actually thought that I go he's right it was so spooky it was so weird I
00:44:29
remember seeing him running around of his Caron it look great but he sounded exactly like him
00:44:34
and he was gone it was pretty amazing that's very nice John John is one of the most
00:44:41
talented people I know John can really sing he said I can really sing he would tell me I can really sing and I I go to
00:44:48
myself sure for a comedian then I saw him really sing and he got so it's the
00:44:53
same kind of compliment that guy can really sing yes he can sing probably the
00:44:58
best well I like to see the show's called from the shower to the stage I
00:45:05
like to sing in the shower and it sounds amazing everyone thinks they sound great in the shower yeah I told him that
00:45:11
should be I'm gonna put out there and Tron Frank Sinatra though Frank Sinatra
00:45:16
everyone goes he's the greatest he wrote a book on singing if anyone's listening called uh tips on popular singing by
00:45:23
Frank Sinatra and he tells you how to sing and it's it's fantastic ftic does it work cu the other day you were
00:45:28
telling oh it work yeah work really works oh because it didn't yeah you told me you're like take
00:45:36
your upper soft pallet I'm like let me just no like every every singing teacher it's your diaphragm pull your stomach in
00:45:42
pull it out to support the air Frank Sinatra is breathe in through your nose
00:45:47
and then because if you breae in through your mouth the the air goes in and dries out your vocal nose and then yeah you're
00:45:57
lungs F air and you feel your rib cage go out he goes don't let your rib cage go back in he's the only one that says
00:46:03
not your stomach your di your rib cage and if you do that that's what you focus on you automatically support it
00:46:11
correctly with yourinal muscles I'm gonna take I'm gonna take a shower right
00:46:16
after this podcast sing I'm gonna take a long long shower after this podcast and everybody
00:46:25
loves somebody sometimes well what's more fun
00:46:32
than singing with a band comedy's hard you're up there he's like the character like don't
00:46:38
make me sing these guys Randy Walman the musical
00:46:43
conductor in the rang heard play with Frank Sinatra George Benson Ray Charles he's the top guy he's barbar right and's
00:46:52
personal pianist and now musical conductor he's been a personal
00:46:57
a companis pist for 36 never heard more boring credits pianist the guitar player
00:47:04
he's the best studio musician guitar player he he's known for Michael J what are we getting at go so he's good now
00:47:11
what I want to see future oh is he on your show players one of the best cell
00:47:16
players in the world this is his band the drumers one of the best drummers he
00:47:21
Dave tall at a p college professor teaches everything there's so great so
00:47:27
you have play with these guys it's not easy David Spade likes it up the
00:47:38
B I thought we were doing VH1 Behind the Music I'm like what's going on talking
00:47:44
that's his band that's your band it's good stuff saying it's not it's fun but it's not easy yeah it's not like Amateur
00:47:50
hour well they're not I'm trying to keep up with them no you are you do good I've seen it it's good okay so Dana nice to
00:47:58
meet you johnce to see you I'll see you out front because you live in my yard
00:48:04
and uh Jerry the dog nice just Jerry oh
00:48:10
boy Jerry don't show the overbite does he have a good angle under bite
00:48:17
right Jerry quit fighting don't don't let him do that stuff to you he's
00:48:24
sleep he's like hey I just to chew on um anyway John great to see
00:48:32
you let's do it again sometime this will never air okay bye bye John bye everybody goodbye this has
00:48:40
been a presentation of Odyssey Superfly is executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade Charlie finan of Brill
00:48:47
entertainment Jenna Weiss Burman of Odyssey Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman hope you liked it
