00:00:00
hey Runners only with dime Harley
00:00:03
Runners only with dom Harvey and uh
00:00:06
Hannah Wilkinson can I call you will key
00:00:08
do I call you Hannah what do I
00:00:12
you can Wilkie a lot of the time you
00:00:13
know I feel like Wilkie is probably the
00:00:15
domain and reservation of teammates
00:00:17
exactly yeah so Hannah it is yeah uh
00:00:20
Striker for the football Ferns and it's
00:00:22
a position that you've had through your
00:00:24
entire 20s
00:00:26
yes yeah
00:00:27
um started out on the national team
00:00:31
2011 2010 2011 yeah and uh yeah I've
00:00:35
been going ever since it's been
00:00:37
incredible career 31 31 years of age
00:00:40
uh 105 games for New Zealand
00:00:43
sounds all right
00:00:45
27 goals
00:00:48
yeah
00:00:49
you're not a stat person are you I don't
00:00:52
know yeah probably
00:00:53
probably I don't know it's your podcast
00:00:55
mate yeah I don't know uh yes I mean it
00:00:58
all sounds correct so yeah and what
00:01:00
100th game for New Zealand at the
00:01:02
Olympics
00:01:03
awesome yeah uh that's not something you
00:01:06
forget no what what happens when you're
00:01:08
in uh the football Ferns and uh you you
00:01:10
have your 100th I know like in the All
00:01:12
Blacks very few people have done it but
00:01:14
they get like a cap presentation yep so
00:01:18
um I got a jersey my name when it was
00:01:20
100
00:01:22
um in a cap and uh you know had a big
00:01:27
sort of Celebration with the team
00:01:30
um and yeah it was just good to you know
00:01:32
do a little speech and like you know it
00:01:34
was it was really cool and even more
00:01:36
special to do it at an Olympic Games so
00:01:38
it's pretty awesome are you emotional at
00:01:39
that time are you an emotional person
00:01:41
with these sort of Milestones
00:01:44
um yeah I think it gives you some time
00:01:46
to reflect I guess
00:01:48
um you know I don't really keep that
00:01:50
very I didn't actually know it was my
00:01:52
100th until I was told no you might
00:01:54
actually get 100 games and I'm like oh
00:01:56
no no way really so uh but yeah it was
00:01:58
cool it was amazing to be able to
00:02:00
reflect and and just be grateful that I
00:02:02
was able to do that with two injuries as
00:02:05
well major injuries was a pretty awesome
00:02:07
thing to be able to achieve yeah major
00:02:09
injuries um knee injuries we'll get into
00:02:12
that there's so much to the Hannah
00:02:13
Wilkinson story to get into
00:02:15
um
00:02:16
including not just the football but you
00:02:18
just being like ridiculously good at
00:02:20
whatever you put you put your mind to
00:02:22
you've got songs on Spotify
00:02:25
um you're an accomplished artist with a
00:02:26
mural at uh Eden Park there's like so
00:02:30
many oh um psychology student at Harvard
00:02:33
as well but there's just so many
00:02:34
feathers to your cap it's just
00:02:36
ridiculous how can one person get so
00:02:38
much talent that's not fear
00:02:41
okay so um FIFA World Cup 2023 here in
00:02:46
here how many how many World Cups have
00:02:47
you been to prove is it two others three
00:02:49
others three others so this is your
00:02:50
fourth yeah so we have the previous
00:02:52
three been uh first one was Germany
00:02:56
um in 2011 and then
00:02:59
uh Canada 2015 and then France 2019.
00:03:03
right so what what does it mean having
00:03:05
it in New Zealand because it's where
00:03:07
were you when you heard the news when
00:03:08
you heard the news about the
00:03:09
announcement can you remember that I um
00:03:11
I was actually with a couple of
00:03:13
teammates I was with flee Anna lilongo
00:03:15
and Erin Naylor in Auckland because we
00:03:18
you know that we needed to be down there
00:03:20
because it was obviously a big deal and
00:03:22
we could actually win the the bid to
00:03:24
host and um we had no sleep because we
00:03:28
had to listen to it live and it was over
00:03:30
in uh wherever FIFA was announcing at
00:03:32
the time and um yeah they they said it
00:03:36
was New Zealand and I couldn't get over
00:03:38
I mean it was just the most amazing news
00:03:40
and we spent their whole No Sleep media
00:03:43
all day and just all of this uh all of
00:03:47
these possibilities unfolding in our
00:03:48
minds like at Eden Park like Opening
00:03:51
match and and now we're here amazing
00:03:53
because was New Zealand was this sort of
00:03:55
like a candidate race or anything like
00:03:56
was New Zealand on a short list or yeah
00:03:59
I think it was yeah it was between us
00:04:01
Japan and
00:04:02
oh I can't remember now yeah a couple of
00:04:04
other countries but I think it was Japan
00:04:06
pulled out for some reason and it gave
00:04:09
us a really good chance and
00:04:12
um yeah we had to obviously co-host with
00:04:13
Australia because we wouldn't we have
00:04:15
the infrastructure we would never be
00:04:17
able to do that alone so oh it's just
00:04:19
incredible yeah because I'm uh I'm not
00:04:23
really like a football person myself so
00:04:25
I I do apologize in advance for any dumb
00:04:27
questions that might come out
00:04:29
um my football knowledge um is probably
00:04:31
similar to Ted lasso on episode one
00:04:33
season one that's about the extent of it
00:04:35
that's
00:04:36
um are we sort of underestimating as new
00:04:39
zealanders how big this tournament is
00:04:40
and do you think it's one of those
00:04:41
things that we won't realize just the
00:04:43
significance of it until it's right here
00:04:45
completely yeah absolutely I think
00:04:47
people are going to start to realize how
00:04:49
big it is once the first games come and
00:04:51
first few games are going to come and go
00:04:54
um yeah there's just the entire world is
00:04:58
going to be watching us that it's it's
00:04:59
the most one of the most watched events
00:05:02
in the world I think this world cup will
00:05:04
be the biggest so
00:05:06
it's actually going to be crazy
00:05:08
people are not ready
00:05:10
[ __ ] I can see like your eyes light up
00:05:12
it's just amazing I mean I've been to
00:05:14
several so it's it's an like an event
00:05:17
unlike anything else and that's one of
00:05:18
the most special I guess because of the
00:05:20
proximity to family and absolutely yeah
00:05:23
yeah I mean we're a team that always
00:05:26
always the away team we are never at
00:05:28
home you know we play overseas
00:05:30
constantly I think most of us just
00:05:33
barely play in New Zealand if that
00:05:36
um you know not even barely any home
00:05:39
games so
00:05:40
um to bring it home and to actually have
00:05:42
a home advantage and then to play in
00:05:45
front of family and friends who helped
00:05:47
you get to where you are is amazing
00:05:49
absolutely incredible and how's New
00:05:51
Zealand going to do uh like where are
00:05:53
you expected to come well you know our
00:05:55
goal so far as to you know make history
00:05:59
and get out of a group and obviously go
00:06:02
beyond you know um our grip is not too
00:06:05
bad it's it's one of the better groups
00:06:06
we've had in the past
00:06:08
um and we can really compete with these
00:06:10
teams and yeah we're going to really go
00:06:12
for them we've been preparing for the
00:06:13
last
00:06:14
you know the last couple of months we've
00:06:16
all been together in Camp and we've been
00:06:18
working bloody hard and it's the longest
00:06:20
time we've ever been together you know
00:06:21
instead of rocking up to a tour with two
00:06:23
trainings
00:06:24
to figure out how to play together
00:06:27
um yeah we're playing together for weeks
00:06:30
and weeks at a time and it's been a real
00:06:32
privilege so that's good but there's um
00:06:34
there's quite a few people in there in
00:06:36
the team in their 30s am I right
00:06:38
yes so it's quite a quite a mature
00:06:41
established team yeah well so I mean
00:06:42
that in the respect that people that
00:06:44
you've played with before and a lot over
00:06:45
the years well traditionally we actually
00:06:47
had a pretty consistent Squad
00:06:50
um of the same players and lately now
00:06:54
last kind of few years actually the
00:06:56
teams go you know kind of gone through a
00:06:59
little bit of a change with some a whole
00:07:01
younger generation has come moved
00:07:02
through into the squad and the original
00:07:04
sort of
00:07:06
key kind of group hasn't
00:07:10
you know it's it's been a little bit of
00:07:12
a process of figuring each other out at
00:07:15
this point like a younger generation in
00:07:16
an older sort of generation as well so
00:07:18
that's
00:07:19
along with a new coach
00:07:22
do you have a comment oh I got it my dog
00:07:26
for anyone that's listening to this
00:07:28
rather than watching the video he is
00:07:30
just like staring at you like
00:07:32
sickeningly in love I know
00:07:40
all right Striker yes yes yeah so that
00:07:42
means you you get the goals how am I
00:07:45
doing so far
00:07:47
good
00:07:48
um okay so let's talk about
00:07:50
um we'll go right back so growing up
00:07:52
you're from whangarei
00:07:54
you're from camo or just whangarei just
00:07:57
whangarei yeah why did I think you're
00:07:58
from camo well I went to Karma High
00:08:00
School in camo like you know football
00:08:03
teams and stuff yeah but um yeah I'm
00:08:06
kind of my I'm from sort of Kensington
00:08:07
which is more and I mean it's not a very
00:08:09
big place you could say I'm from come if
00:08:11
you want
00:08:13
um and you what what other sports did
00:08:14
you play like I we established early on
00:08:16
that you're very good at a number of
00:08:18
things which we'll get into
00:08:19
um were there other sports that you
00:08:21
played that you excelled at when you
00:08:22
were younger or
00:08:24
um yeah I played a little bit of a
00:08:26
little bit of rugby a little bit of uh
00:08:28
like track I was I loved sort of
00:08:31
sprinting and maybe some cross-country
00:08:33
surfing I really enjoyed uh but football
00:08:36
is the one that kind of really stuck for
00:08:38
me I fell in love with it pretty quickly
00:08:40
yeah because you had um two brothers who
00:08:44
both played yeah so do you think that's
00:08:46
what attracted you to football
00:08:50
like you know I just followed them and
00:08:52
we were naturally very competitive
00:08:53
people so they both older brothers or
00:08:56
are you the middle on the middle child
00:08:57
yeah so one younger one older having an
00:09:00
older brother that would help sharpen
00:09:02
the pencil though I'd imagine when it
00:09:03
comes to Sport and stuff yeah definitely
00:09:05
I mean I think he lost interest pretty
00:09:07
quickly my little brother um he carried
00:09:10
on and loved it and then my dad started
00:09:12
coaching and that's when I started to
00:09:13
get pretty serious and yeah just keep
00:09:16
going amazing and you even had a photo
00:09:18
of um I heard you had a photo of uh Maya
00:09:21
Jackman who's Maya Jackson oh yeah my
00:09:24
Jackman is a New Zealand football Fern
00:09:26
she's a legend of the game is that
00:09:28
terrible that I that I don't know who
00:09:29
Maya Jackson is it's terrible I'm going
00:09:32
to teach you all about her now yeah yeah
00:09:35
I'm I'm real sorry I I feel like I
00:09:37
deserve to be educated so who is Maya
00:09:39
Jackman and she's a she was one of the
00:09:42
um kind of Front Runners for football
00:09:44
ferns she's in uh
00:09:46
or kind of earlier World Cups
00:09:49
um like are we talking 80s or 90s 90s I
00:09:52
believe
00:09:53
um and she was a footballer that I
00:09:55
looked up to quite a lot growing up like
00:09:56
I had my yeah posted her on my wall and
00:09:59
okay
00:10:00
um I kind of managed to join the team
00:10:03
kind of right as she was leaving I think
00:10:05
and also your paths crossed yeah
00:10:08
slightly I think I do remember some
00:10:10
trainings with her it's got to be the
00:10:13
most surreal pinch myself moment so yeah
00:10:15
you're you're in the same team as this
00:10:17
as this lady who you hit on your wall as
00:10:19
a poster where did you hear the poster
00:10:20
from where would you get a poster of
00:10:22
Maya Jackman oh I mean that was that was
00:10:24
the kind of female football icon growing
00:10:27
up right there weren't many because you
00:10:30
know growing up I was I was only kind of
00:10:32
looking up at you know male players
00:10:36
um because there wasn't much women's
00:10:37
football at all yeah so Maya was quite a
00:10:40
key sort of
00:10:41
figure
00:10:42
obviously the more serious that women's
00:10:45
football became in New Zealand the more
00:10:47
visibility we got
00:10:48
um the more we got to know and look up
00:10:50
to all of those past football fans yeah
00:10:54
and then
00:10:55
thankfully I ended up playing with a lot
00:10:57
of them which was incredible and such an
00:10:59
honor
00:11:00
yeah dear dear fangirl hello do you
00:11:03
manage to keep it pretty chill I mean I
00:11:05
think I came in there kind of just with
00:11:07
such a a desire tip all I wanted to do
00:11:11
when I started to get really serious
00:11:12
with football was to represent my
00:11:14
country
00:11:15
and so yeah all of these girls that I
00:11:17
was looking up to and watching on TV I
00:11:19
was starting to get to play alongside
00:11:21
them and that was amazing and to be not
00:11:23
just play alongside them but to be
00:11:24
guided by them and coach for them with
00:11:26
sex it's the I mean it's
00:11:29
it's
00:11:30
that sort of guidance has led me to
00:11:33
become the player I am now yeah so so
00:11:35
when you made the team you were like 17
00:11:37
years old right
00:11:39
17 I just turned 18 maybe I think when I
00:11:41
made that Senior Team yeah the football
00:11:43
fans I was yes 17.
00:11:46
so how old was Maya then same age as
00:11:48
what you are now the early 30s must be
00:11:51
yeah I don't know I don't think so
00:11:53
that's a huge age Gap isn't it I don't
00:11:57
know if she's that old no no but I mean
00:11:59
like like do you feel it now like when
00:12:01
say a 17 or 18 year old comes into the
00:12:03
team like from where you are now like in
00:12:04
you oh yeah they're doing The Tick Tock
00:12:06
dances are you like I'm too old for this
00:12:08
[ __ ] yeah no it is I mean you start to
00:12:10
see that and that's what we're
00:12:11
experiencing at the moment as a squad
00:12:13
and has been for the last few years is
00:12:15
the
00:12:16
um
00:12:17
converging of the younger generation
00:12:19
with the kind of veterans that we're in
00:12:22
for so long I mean we're seeing Millie
00:12:24
Clegg now as the 17 year old coming in
00:12:25
and I'm like wow you are so young but
00:12:28
you can see like you know the the future
00:12:31
and it's exciting because she's a
00:12:33
fantastic player yeah
00:12:36
so so growing up in whangarei playing
00:12:39
football in the I'm guessing the like
00:12:41
the 90s early 2000s was there was there
00:12:43
a girls team no no no way I played with
00:12:46
boys until I was about 16. so you'll be
00:12:49
playing a boys team or was it like
00:12:50
called a mixed team and whether you're
00:12:52
going to mix team there was usually just
00:12:54
me but I had a couple of other girls
00:12:56
okay maybe one or two others because
00:12:59
I've had Sophie Divine on the podcast
00:13:00
you know Sophie Devine yeah yeah and she
00:13:02
is she a bit older than you maybe she's
00:13:03
mid to late 30s I don't know I feel like
00:13:05
yeah I'm not sure but she she talked
00:13:07
about that uh yeah same situation as you
00:13:10
played with Brothers growing up yeah um
00:13:12
lots of fries brother chase you with a
00:13:15
stump one day and then
00:13:19
so she just had to plan the boys team
00:13:21
and she she um shared a story on the
00:13:23
podcast about how usually the other boys
00:13:26
were okay but it was some of the parents
00:13:28
were like quite weird about it she's got
00:13:31
you you didn't sort of encounter any of
00:13:32
that anything like that from either
00:13:34
either I mean nothing that I knew of you
00:13:37
know I think if anything it would be my
00:13:39
parents at the fear of like you can't
00:13:41
play with boys like it's gonna be too
00:13:43
rough but in fact you know it meant that
00:13:46
you could compete a little bit harder
00:13:47
and push yourself that little bit more
00:13:49
so I'm actually really grateful I got to
00:13:50
play with boys and I think a lot of
00:13:52
ferns that had similar upbringings would
00:13:54
say the same did they did they have a
00:13:56
rule in whangarei I know some parts of
00:13:58
the country have this rule where
00:14:00
um if you're a girl and you're playing
00:14:01
in a boys team and you scored you got
00:14:03
two points instead of one yeah
00:14:13
like reflecting and looking back now do
00:14:16
you think um yeah like playing with uh
00:14:17
with boys the same age or even a bit
00:14:20
older than you there's like a sort of
00:14:21
made you made you stronger major tougher
00:14:23
majority it certainly made me more
00:14:25
competitive yeah I think
00:14:27
um
00:14:28
and it also kind of teaches you a lot
00:14:31
about you shouldn't underestimate
00:14:32
yourself regardless of your you know
00:14:34
regardless of your gender you should be
00:14:36
yeah trying to push yourself to be the
00:14:38
best and I didn't care if it was up
00:14:40
against like a six foot tall Butler like
00:14:43
I just try you know so yeah no I'm
00:14:45
really I appreciate it yeah that's cool
00:14:48
and then you moved to Auckland at 17 you
00:14:50
came here to study and
00:14:54
she said everything must have happened
00:14:55
really quick yeah it did I think that
00:14:58
was one thing that was tough for me at
00:15:00
the time is kind of breaking into teams
00:15:02
or having I did try to make the under
00:15:04
17s you know the under 17 Women's World
00:15:07
Cup that was here I wish I had to make
00:15:09
that team
00:15:10
um and I did travel down it kind of
00:15:12
every week
00:15:13
uh for us like a trial sort of squad and
00:15:16
but never actually made the squad and
00:15:17
that was a moment where I was just so
00:15:20
devastated you know
00:15:22
um good I'm pleased to hear there's been
00:15:24
a little bit of adversity in your life
00:15:25
of course there has been
00:15:27
you can't get success without failure so
00:15:30
um but yeah so that was a moment that
00:15:33
was really like crushing for me
00:15:34
obviously you know young kid wanting all
00:15:36
these dreams and not getting perked
00:15:37
that's you know always hard
00:15:39
um and then how does how does that
00:15:41
happen that you missed out on the under
00:15:42
17 New Zealand team and then the the
00:15:44
next year or even the same year you're
00:15:46
playing for the national I think I had a
00:15:48
I I grew about three foot tall which
00:15:52
helped I got a little bit you know
00:15:53
stronger got a bit fitter
00:15:55
um I think technically I got a little
00:15:57
bit better I got a little bit smarter
00:15:58
with the game uh moved to Auckland as
00:16:01
well so I was under the noses of their
00:16:03
coaches more often and I think that's
00:16:05
how it can happen for me
00:16:06
and since then you you're I mean it
00:16:09
probably doesn't feel like this for you
00:16:10
but from an outsider's perspective when
00:16:12
you read the Wikipedia page it looks
00:16:14
like the last 13 14 years has just been
00:16:16
like a crazy Whirlwind like you're in
00:16:18
Tennessee for five years
00:16:20
um then you're then you're in um Sweden
00:16:23
and you're in uh Portugal and you're in
00:16:26
Australia and you mean more you're
00:16:28
playing for the New Zealand national
00:16:30
side this whole this whole time from an
00:16:32
outsider's perspective it looks like
00:16:34
it's been a hell of a life yeah it is I
00:16:36
mean that's what's great about football
00:16:38
is it's a global Sport and it's the
00:16:40
biggest most popular sport in the world
00:16:42
and it's everywhere it's all over the
00:16:44
world it would take you
00:16:46
uh to some incredible places and it you
00:16:49
know meant that I could go and play in
00:16:51
the states and you know pay for my
00:16:53
education and just the amount of
00:16:55
opportunities that I've got through
00:16:57
football are just phenomenal and um I'm
00:17:00
just so excited that you know
00:17:02
Australia and New Zealand are going to
00:17:04
see the global game it's just not common
00:17:06
football is just not that popular here
00:17:08
at all no it's way down in the in the
00:17:10
sporting ranking out yeah we just don't
00:17:12
understand it do you does it bother you
00:17:14
when people here soccer
00:17:16
um and I suppose being being a little
00:17:18
bit spending so much time in America
00:17:19
you're sort of used to it that's what I
00:17:21
mean it was in America yeah it's it's
00:17:22
soccer and um
00:17:25
but I think
00:17:27
yeah it is football like that's the
00:17:30
traditional sort of that was the yeah
00:17:32
makes no sense that rugby should be
00:17:34
called football it should be like a
00:17:35
handball or yeah candy for short Maybe
00:17:37
not maybe yeah well even living in
00:17:40
Australia now because football's now
00:17:41
it's AFL yeah and I'm like no
00:17:45
you know it's just guess it can get
00:17:46
confusing but yeah football is
00:17:48
definitely the right word for us yeah so
00:17:51
so you moved to Tennessee 17 18. I
00:17:54
actually went when I was 20. oh okay
00:17:56
yeah I see you're in Auckland for a
00:17:58
couple of years I was in Auckland
00:17:59
studying for a while psychology yeah
00:18:02
yeah
00:18:03
yep and then um just decided to go over
00:18:05
there continue my study and I heard a
00:18:08
lot of really good things about college
00:18:10
and um kind of looked around or you know
00:18:14
uh sent kind of a playing resume out to
00:18:19
like some you know I don't know it was
00:18:21
some system that worked into some Scouts
00:18:22
yeah pretty much and um yeah met with a
00:18:26
lot of different teams they actually
00:18:28
committed to Maryland because I really
00:18:29
like the coach his name is Brian Penske
00:18:31
and I went I was about to go to Maryland
00:18:33
but he told me at the end of my
00:18:35
recruitment year that he was moving to
00:18:37
Tennessee and he was like do you want to
00:18:39
just like have a look at school because
00:18:40
I liked him a lot as a coach
00:18:42
and I love Tennessee it was awesome so I
00:18:44
was like yeah let's do it it was
00:18:46
fantastic
00:18:47
what'd you love about it
00:18:49
um
00:18:51
I loved that it was only a women's team
00:18:54
there
00:18:55
and women's sport at the University of
00:18:58
Tennessee is traditionally really big so
00:19:00
the the I don't know if you've heard of
00:19:02
The Lady Vols basketball it's a huge
00:19:05
program
00:19:06
um where they had a very famous women's
00:19:09
Coach that took them to just several
00:19:12
championships and they were just
00:19:13
extremely successful so the the emphasis
00:19:16
on women's sport and women's success and
00:19:18
women's Athletics there was massive and
00:19:20
I love that and they also had a lot of
00:19:22
international athletes which I also
00:19:24
really really loved the facilities were
00:19:26
fantastic so it was just amazing it's an
00:19:29
amazing place what about what about
00:19:30
homesickness you're a long way a long
00:19:32
way from whangarei yeah I was really
00:19:33
homesick when I first went there like
00:19:35
first six months it was a wreck it's
00:19:37
where were we staying were you like in a
00:19:38
dorm or a hall or a flat or what I
00:19:42
started off in some dorms sort of um
00:19:45
student departments kind of and then um
00:19:49
yeah eventually moved into kind of
00:19:51
off-campus living and
00:19:54
it was just awesome eh was it it really
00:19:56
was once I got over the homesick I was I
00:19:59
loved it and I fell in love with country
00:20:00
music and it was just such a cool
00:20:03
experience seriously anyone any like kid
00:20:05
in New Zealand especially like women's
00:20:07
footballers that want to be successful
00:20:09
go to college I'm telling you it's the
00:20:11
best thing for you you get you will end
00:20:13
up you know getting your education paid
00:20:15
for most of the time if you're a good
00:20:17
player and um you know you have an
00:20:21
incredible experience and it's a really
00:20:22
good stepping stone into professional
00:20:24
you know and did it feel like you'd
00:20:27
walked into like the scene of like 10
00:20:28
Things I Hate About You or you know it
00:20:31
was there like um sororities and yeah
00:20:34
yeah
00:20:36
the Red Cups
00:20:39
movie it was actually it was yeah were
00:20:42
you in a house or is that what they call
00:20:44
it a like a house or a yeah I did end up
00:20:46
like living in a house with a bunch of
00:20:48
teammates no it has like a sorority
00:20:50
house oh like actually yeah well those
00:20:53
those are more uh you kind of get
00:20:57
they're like kind of uh generationally
00:21:00
sorted out like that's like uh if you
00:21:03
have like all your parents
00:21:05
my dad was this okay so then I'm gonna
00:21:09
so we'll keep from whangarei no you're
00:21:11
not you're not allowed in the uh land I
00:21:13
mean those you kind of if you had
00:21:15
parties and you would rock up to one of
00:21:17
those but I I didn't particularly enjoy
00:21:19
those really I mean I think they were
00:21:20
just
00:21:22
it was just too much I like what's the
00:21:24
drinking like over there because New
00:21:26
Zealand gets a very bad rep and I think
00:21:28
rightfully so far like our drinking
00:21:29
culture here
00:21:31
um what was it like over there in terms
00:21:32
of binge drinking and oh it's right up
00:21:34
there yeah absolutely yes they know
00:21:36
better than us well it was funny because
00:21:38
I went uh over when I was 20.
00:21:41
you know and over there the league
00:21:46
2010 in the weekends because in the
00:21:49
spring sessions you train all week and
00:21:51
then you get the weekends off and the
00:21:52
weekends when you like go for it you
00:21:54
know and um yeah I went out with my
00:21:57
mates 20 years old and um was wondering
00:22:01
like why is why are they the why is the
00:22:03
guy at the door put these huge x's on my
00:22:05
hand so he put x's on your hands because
00:22:07
it means you can't drink
00:22:09
it's under 20. and uh so I learned a
00:22:13
little thing called bathroom beers this
00:22:14
is probably the worst thing to be
00:22:15
talking about right before a workout but
00:22:17
this is a long time ago this is great
00:22:19
yeah enough time has passed since then
00:22:21
you played like a zillion games you're
00:22:24
good those days are certainly I'll see
00:22:26
you go to the bathroom and just let the
00:22:27
scrub off there well no you take your
00:22:29
beers into the bathroom and you drink
00:22:31
them in there oh okay
00:22:32
what's it you have to go in there and
00:22:33
like just like
00:22:34
yeah if you're under 21. so yeah
00:22:38
you go to the bathroom like every half
00:22:40
hour or so with a beer and you just go
00:22:41
yeah with your mates
00:22:44
and they bring it in oh okay yeah sorry
00:22:47
I was terribly explained but yeah just
00:22:50
for clarification I do not do this
00:22:52
anymore I know I I love that yeah what
00:22:54
is your relationship with alcohol like
00:22:55
now no no don't really non-existent no
00:22:58
well I mean we have to keep on top of
00:23:01
everything so yeah but would you have
00:23:03
like a wine at dinner or no not at all
00:23:04
oh occasionally yeah yeah
00:23:07
yeah and then um so you so in Tennessee
00:23:09
you get a do you graduate you get a BA
00:23:12
in psychology
00:23:14
um yep I get a
00:23:15
I actually
00:23:17
um yeah graduate graduated with
00:23:20
uh being psych but because I tore my ACL
00:23:24
um
00:23:26
towards the end of my undergrad year
00:23:29
what you you get given basically when
00:23:31
you go to college you get five years to
00:23:33
complete four like five seasons to
00:23:35
complete four and if you get hurt you've
00:23:37
got an extra season it's called your red
00:23:39
shirt season
00:23:40
and I use my red shirt
00:23:43
um season to study like a post-grade
00:23:45
course because I've finished my degree
00:23:46
so I ended up
00:23:48
you know injuring myself but becoming
00:23:50
more qualified as a result that's always
00:23:52
awesome what what Drew you to psychology
00:23:55
and it hasn't been helpful for like the
00:23:58
mental side of your game I actually
00:24:01
really wanted to be a physio but
00:24:04
um
00:24:05
I wanted to be a professional footballer
00:24:07
too or a player for New Zealand so that
00:24:08
was just not an option I had to I didn't
00:24:10
have the time to put in the hours so I
00:24:13
just kind of leaned towards a more
00:24:14
Theory based practice and that was
00:24:16
psychology and then I ended up really
00:24:18
enjoying it over time studying a lot of
00:24:20
different branches of it and um
00:24:22
yeah just kind of kept going with that
00:24:24
and it has been helpful it has it in
00:24:26
terms of um yourself internally or
00:24:29
reading other players or dealing with
00:24:30
other players or how's it been helpful I
00:24:33
think mostly um coping with
00:24:35
anxiety like performance anxiety and
00:24:38
pressure because like
00:24:40
that just keeps ramping up the more
00:24:42
successful you become it just
00:24:44
it can become unbearable you know so
00:24:47
when you have the strategies to go back
00:24:49
to kind of
00:24:51
let's start and figure out why you
00:24:53
started playing in the first place and
00:24:54
what you find extremely enjoyable about
00:24:56
what you do it actually is really
00:24:58
helpful when you can have that sort of
00:25:00
grounding mindful those sort of
00:25:03
strategies are helpful and learning
00:25:04
about those over time when I was injured
00:25:06
it was particularly helpful as well yeah
00:25:08
oh I can imagine
00:25:10
yeah that must have been tough so you've
00:25:12
um had like two fairly significant knee
00:25:16
injuries in your career so the first one
00:25:17
was at Tennessee yes so what was that
00:25:19
like a an ACL thing yeah both of them is
00:25:23
right on the same league
00:25:24
yeah it's both of the way I mean this is
00:25:27
an extremely common injury you actually
00:25:28
won't see most of the some of the best
00:25:30
players in the world at this world cup
00:25:32
because of the this these injuries like
00:25:34
this ACL injury it's happening all the
00:25:36
time in women's
00:25:37
uh women's football in the women's sport
00:25:40
as well and I the way I did it I mean it
00:25:42
was just the Classic when someone says
00:25:44
like I blew out my knee it's exactly
00:25:46
what I did so just sprinting at a
00:25:48
Defender
00:25:49
stopping on the leg to change direction
00:25:51
and it's just explodes almost terrible
00:25:55
injury so straight away you know that oh
00:25:57
yes it feels horrible
00:25:58
it's basically you just dislocate the
00:26:00
joint
00:26:01
and it tears the main ligament that
00:26:03
holds it all together and they're not
00:26:05
suppose there's a period where you you
00:26:08
sort of hope for the best but expect the
00:26:09
worst and then you get the uh you get a
00:26:11
scan or a ultrasound or whatever yeah
00:26:14
and then what are they [ __ ] how's that
00:26:17
yeah look doing it for the first time it
00:26:19
was you know you kind of know but just
00:26:21
want to be optimistic but
00:26:23
um there's a pretty
00:26:24
uh awful test that the physios do when
00:26:27
they basically test if your joint's
00:26:29
still together and you can kind of feel
00:26:30
it when they're testing so it's yeah
00:26:31
it's not pretty
00:26:33
um and so that
00:26:35
first one was just it was really tough
00:26:37
but I was so grateful to be at College
00:26:40
under that support was just amazing
00:26:42
because they just had the best
00:26:43
facilities and they're the most
00:26:45
incredible um rehab facilities you mean
00:26:47
yeah and I mean they're taking care of
00:26:49
football like I'm talking American
00:26:51
football college players that I mean
00:26:54
they see this injury time time again so
00:26:56
they know exactly like buy the book what
00:26:58
to do
00:27:00
um but mentally that must be
00:27:02
I I'm probably projecting here in a way
00:27:04
look I'm not playing for the national
00:27:06
team I'm just a guy that likes to run
00:27:09
but um the last like year or so I've
00:27:11
been like coming back from uh well still
00:27:14
arthritis situation and I had a couple
00:27:16
of physios that said if it hurts when I
00:27:18
run the solution is just not to run so
00:27:20
I've got a little bit of cartilage there
00:27:21
but but not much suffering been
00:27:22
rehabbing hard but it's um again I'm
00:27:25
just a guy that likes to run because
00:27:26
mentally it makes me feel good but [ __ ]
00:27:28
it's been tough yeah it has been really
00:27:30
tough yeah you know the the thing that
00:27:32
you love and it's like
00:27:33
if I mean for you it's some ah I don't
00:27:36
know it's it's part of your identity at
00:27:38
the moment yeah yeah absolutely
00:27:40
especially when I did it again on the
00:27:42
second leg and and that's
00:27:44
that's when I was a little bit wiser a
00:27:46
little bit older and learned from the
00:27:48
first one and then um with my background
00:27:51
and psychology I was very motivated to
00:27:54
learn about the
00:27:55
uh the physiology of the injury why it
00:27:58
takes so long what the surgery does when
00:28:01
it you know the main problem is we're
00:28:05
periods of inactivity just atrophy your
00:28:07
muscles and that's the problem you have
00:28:09
to build back muscle
00:28:10
uh and then it's just this ongoing
00:28:12
period of tedious exercise after tedious
00:28:15
exercise until you know you're
00:28:18
eventually starting to walk normally and
00:28:20
then you're eventually being able to jog
00:28:21
and it but it's just so slow so the way
00:28:24
that you have to like focus on it is
00:28:26
like not days at a time but weeks at a
00:28:28
time because then we focus on the weeks
00:28:30
you see that you are moving forward in
00:28:32
the right direction
00:28:33
so simple things like that where you
00:28:35
actually have to reframe a lot really
00:28:38
helpful
00:28:39
um
00:28:40
and honestly there's just so much advice
00:28:42
out there because people have done it so
00:28:44
many people have done it the best people
00:28:45
the best players rupino's done I think
00:28:47
three times so she inspired me a lot
00:28:49
when I was going through this
00:28:52
um and now look at her she said her I
00:28:54
don't know fifth World Cup yeah yeah but
00:28:57
how do you control I I don't know how do
00:29:00
you control like the negative thoughts
00:29:01
and stuff because I'm thinking so for me
00:29:03
I just want to get running again and
00:29:05
that's it
00:29:06
um for you
00:29:07
I mean you've got to think Sheriff I'm
00:29:09
not back in time there's going to be
00:29:10
some 17 18 year old that comes in and
00:29:13
you know like emotionally and mentally
00:29:15
how the [ __ ] do you deal with that
00:29:17
so you're trying to get yourself better
00:29:19
but in the meantime someone else could
00:29:20
be coming and taking your spot I guess
00:29:23
that comes down to like just really
00:29:25
focusing on what you can control
00:29:27
because if you are fixating on things
00:29:29
you can't control it's just not going to
00:29:31
help you at all so you just have to go
00:29:33
back to what you can control for
00:29:35
yourself and that's what I did with my
00:29:36
second one I just was like I'm gonna go
00:29:39
for this and I'm gonna do everything I
00:29:40
can
00:29:42
um to get back
00:29:43
and um it worked it did yeah it was hard
00:29:47
so hard you know and these knee injuries
00:29:49
I mean like you're nearly the same after
00:29:52
but you figure out ways to prevent it in
00:29:55
ways to keep you strong so that you can
00:29:58
be the best version of yourself at the
00:29:59
time yeah you're nervous for 50 year old
00:30:01
Hannah no yes I'm terrified
00:30:04
about your osteoarthritis and you I'll
00:30:06
get a star cycling career I think
00:30:08
certainly
00:30:09
some sometimes I'll get out of bed and
00:30:12
turn the money to go for a win it's like
00:30:13
oh
00:30:15
it feels like I've played like 100 games
00:30:17
for the All Blacks or something
00:30:19
um okay so then so from Tennessee yeah
00:30:21
so where do you end up after that you
00:30:23
end up in Sweden no Portugal uh no yeah
00:30:26
I went to Sweden as my first
00:30:28
professional contract
00:30:30
um and that was
00:30:32
an interesting experience what do you
00:30:34
mean well
00:30:36
we
00:30:37
first of all we
00:30:40
the Internationals that go to this like
00:30:42
clubs in Sweden I mean this is probably
00:30:44
different now and I hope it is because
00:30:45
there's more and more investment in the
00:30:46
women's game but when I went in there um
00:30:48
I ended up
00:30:50
living with a Canadian International but
00:30:52
we stayed in this it was a a basement
00:30:56
but it was being rented out it was a
00:30:58
basement uh apartment it was rented out
00:31:00
by one of the managers
00:31:04
um work friends
00:31:06
which is really really weird actually so
00:31:08
bizarre if you think about it and uh
00:31:11
that was fine and good and whatever like
00:31:13
it's just it was such a small town yeah
00:31:15
and uh the management just kind of
00:31:19
worked with with people that really
00:31:22
supported the women's game so it's
00:31:23
actually quite cool what they did and
00:31:25
they had facility or places for players
00:31:28
Internationals to come and live and it
00:31:30
was just a really easy way to help us
00:31:32
like have somewhere
00:31:34
um at the basement it was a little bit
00:31:36
uh like my stuff got really moldy
00:31:38
because it was just really damn I mean
00:31:40
with Sweden you know so that was a
00:31:43
bummer but it was an adventure you know
00:31:45
like it's the first time professional
00:31:48
um it's very small town in the South
00:31:50
Sweden and it was a great Club awesome
00:31:53
um people uh improved significantly did
00:31:57
you yeah it did yeah oh it's just pushed
00:31:59
the if you want to just really improve
00:32:01
uh at football you've got to go to these
00:32:04
leagues these leagues will push you and
00:32:06
yeah and I suppose because you didn't
00:32:08
really want to go home to your basement
00:32:09
you spend extra long at training exactly
00:32:11
yeah as long as we could right it wasn't
00:32:14
that bad yeah it really wasn't that bad
00:32:16
but it's just funny you all hear a lot
00:32:18
of funny stories like that from women's
00:32:19
players and I think from like I would
00:32:21
argue like maybe a lot of women's
00:32:22
athletes all over the world because uh
00:32:25
sport for women is not really set up in
00:32:28
the way or traditionally it's not really
00:32:30
set up in the way it is for me you're
00:32:32
not treated as well as the men exactly
00:32:34
yeah yeah most of the time I think
00:32:36
sometimes you must have seen like
00:32:38
seismic improvements and and yours for
00:32:41
30 years yeah I mean I've gone from that
00:32:42
to like I went and played in Portugal uh
00:32:45
at sporting where Ronaldo played and
00:32:47
it's the academy and we're like all as a
00:32:50
collective men's and women's training is
00:32:52
the same sort of kind of facilities and
00:32:53
living like close to Lisbon and like
00:32:56
you're treated like a real professional
00:32:57
along with Melbourne City where I'm at
00:32:59
now it's the same thing so yeah it has
00:33:01
did you did you have seen Ronaldo in
00:33:04
real life no I never saw him but I did
00:33:06
see Bruno
00:33:08
what's his name damn place for
00:33:10
Manchester United
00:33:11
I don't know you're asking the titler
00:33:13
guy yeah well all I know about Ronaldo
00:33:16
is um I would change sexuality for him
00:33:18
would you
00:33:21
I don't know he's yeah he's good I feel
00:33:25
like it'd be yeah maybe love himself a
00:33:27
bit too much I don't know I think so man
00:33:30
what about the Olympics did you meet do
00:33:32
you fangirl over anyone at the Olympics
00:33:33
do you see anyone the Olympics
00:33:36
um I saw
00:33:39
in 2012 we met Neymar
00:33:42
you have to know who Neymar is you'll go
00:33:45
and Google him later then if you don't
00:33:46
know and um another guy that you won't
00:33:50
know but that was the biggest who's the
00:33:52
other guy that I won't know because of
00:33:54
um I don't know people that are into
00:33:55
football that listen to this what are
00:33:56
the Brazilians because we were Brazil
00:33:58
played no God no sorry I'm not that old
00:34:05
you know I don't know no Google Neymar
00:34:08
though he was again man he's fantastic
00:34:11
all I know all I know is Messi Ronaldo
00:34:13
and Beckham and that's and Rooney I
00:34:15
haven't met any of those guys sorry yeah
00:34:17
um because I had Marcus Marcus Daniel on
00:34:18
the pot do you know Marcus Daniel was
00:34:20
tennis player he got a bronzeman about
00:34:21
the last games um yeah for for doubles
00:34:24
and I asked him that same question and
00:34:25
he said they yeah they saw the Williams
00:34:27
sisters and Usain Bolt at the food court
00:34:29
one day and they would they were just
00:34:31
like they ended up like taking their
00:34:32
food away and going and eating in
00:34:34
private because they were just like
00:34:35
swarmed so you got all the all these
00:34:37
people there the the the the best of the
00:34:39
best in the world and and then you've
00:34:41
got these people that everyone knows
00:34:42
marriages they're trying to do the same
00:34:44
gig exactly I can't get any privacy oh
00:34:47
God all right we have to look up how am
00:34:49
I looking up Neymar right of his name
00:34:51
down okay
00:34:53
everybody listening is going to be like
00:34:55
dude really yeah you're a loser you're a
00:34:58
loser what an embarrassment watch him
00:34:59
play too because he's fantastic yeah and
00:35:01
then um so so you go from Sweden to
00:35:04
Portugal
00:35:05
from Sweden I yeah that's actually where
00:35:08
I did my second ACL and then when was
00:35:10
this this was reasonably recent day it
00:35:12
was 2018. 19. 2018 I
00:35:16
came back from it and then yeah I went
00:35:19
to Portugal kind of after the World Cup
00:35:21
in France
00:35:23
um
00:35:24
and
00:35:25
that was great it was awesome I loved it
00:35:28
it improved my touch I mean I've never
00:35:30
really been a very technical player so
00:35:32
that to improve that part of my game was
00:35:34
really important what does that mean can
00:35:36
you explain that so that's like because
00:35:37
by this stage you'd already played like
00:35:39
say 50 games for New Zealand or
00:35:41
something yeah like you're an
00:35:42
experienced yeah and so I'm the kind of
00:35:44
forward that kind of as athletic sort of
00:35:47
running in behind fast strong winning
00:35:49
balls in the ear it's quite a raw way of
00:35:51
playing
00:35:53
um whereas if you're say like a
00:35:55
midfielder or you you're a striker that
00:35:56
comes down to get the ball at your feet
00:35:59
that's making that means that you're
00:36:01
kind of a more technical player and
00:36:03
you're able to take really good touches
00:36:05
on the ball and dribble past people and
00:36:08
um that part of my game I obviously was
00:36:10
improving over time but going to
00:36:12
Portugal it really helped I played
00:36:13
basically among the Portuguese national
00:36:15
team
00:36:16
wow yeah so we actually played them
00:36:18
recently and I just met up with all of
00:36:20
them and it was fantastic oh how cool
00:36:21
what do they say is it Spanish do they
00:36:23
speak there Portuguese or Portuguese did
00:36:25
you did you know any could you look did
00:36:27
you learn it I learned
00:36:29
this is how do you play all you do is
00:36:31
you learn then you learn like all the
00:36:34
moves on the on the football field so if
00:36:36
it's right in Swedish it's like if it's
00:36:38
Lyft it's vinster and then it's like
00:36:40
because there's pressure in Portuguese
00:36:42
there's couldado you got to be careful
00:36:43
so you learn all of that just the key
00:36:46
words for the game exactly
00:36:48
um and then you know the Internationals
00:36:50
because everywhere you kind of play
00:36:52
you'll have Internationals and English
00:36:53
is the kind of the base language and you
00:36:56
would have like another coach
00:36:58
telling you what the coach is saying in
00:37:00
your ear just translating it you know
00:37:03
gotta be so difficult
00:37:04
there's a quite a quite a lonely
00:37:06
experience
00:37:07
can be but
00:37:09
International so it's like
00:37:11
it's not hard to
00:37:14
um you know not understand something in
00:37:16
football because it really is so
00:37:18
Universal it's a universal game you know
00:37:20
so everybody tends to understand what's
00:37:23
going on when it comes to games but the
00:37:25
communication back and forth was a coach
00:37:27
sometimes is what has the difficult
00:37:29
so you've got your phone out and you're
00:37:32
recording it and then putting it through
00:37:33
a translator I've done that so many
00:37:34
times
00:37:35
yes
00:37:39
yeah
00:37:39
yeah unreal what's the what's the um is
00:37:42
there a game that stands out as the best
00:37:43
game of your career I know you've had a
00:37:45
game where you scored like five goal you
00:37:46
scored all the goals who was who was
00:37:48
that foreign against was that for New
00:37:50
Zealand
00:37:51
Melbourne City right so that was just so
00:37:54
that's where you're at now you're
00:37:55
playing Melbourne now Melbourne City
00:37:57
yeah so the season before last
00:38:00
was a boxing day match against Melbourne
00:38:03
Victory so that's why that was so
00:38:05
awesome because Victory are Arch enemies
00:38:09
and we beat them five I think it was
00:38:12
five did they score I can't remember if
00:38:14
they scored or not but regardless it was
00:38:16
just the most satisfying game ever and
00:38:19
and you scored five goals obviously it's
00:38:20
a team effort but did you
00:38:22
like putting modesty aside like can you
00:38:25
look back now and go you played out of
00:38:27
your [ __ ] skin yeah yeah look I think
00:38:31
I was
00:38:32
good to be in the right positions I was
00:38:34
in the in the positions where I needed
00:38:35
to be as a fort and
00:38:38
my team did the rest as a Ford all you
00:38:41
are there to do is to put the ball away
00:38:42
and if you're in the right position to
00:38:43
do so and you do it you've done your job
00:38:45
because your team relies on you to to do
00:38:49
that they they build the ball up to put
00:38:51
it on a platter for you to finish and
00:38:52
that's the ideal sort of way that
00:38:54
football works and then did would you
00:38:57
say like objectively their goalie had a
00:38:59
like a bad game or
00:39:01
um I think there were a couple of goals
00:39:03
where yes the keeper really messed up
00:39:06
and also one of their Defenders really
00:39:09
messed up as well so that if you're a
00:39:12
Ford that can anticipate mistakes like
00:39:14
that that's a that's a good thing so
00:39:16
it's always key to like look out for
00:39:18
those kind of mistakes from the other
00:39:20
team but yeah they she did have a bit of
00:39:22
a man that game God who would want to be
00:39:23
a keeper right that's going to be the I
00:39:26
know the tough have you ever been um on
00:39:28
a team where the the keepers had a like
00:39:30
an absolute shocker and how do you deal
00:39:31
with that afterwards
00:39:34
um like it's gonna be the hardest thing
00:39:35
if you if you know you're stuffed up
00:39:36
like you'd carry the weight of the I
00:39:39
don't know of course I think I mean
00:39:41
being yeah I think when you're in a team
00:39:44
sport no matter what happens you all
00:39:46
take ownership of that result you know
00:39:48
what I mean so if I'm scoring five goals
00:39:50
for example that's not my win that's our
00:39:53
win because we did it you know and if we
00:39:56
lose five now that's our loss that's not
00:39:59
the keeper yeah you know that's not the
00:40:00
Keeper's fault for
00:40:02
for um conceding five goals it's all of
00:40:04
us we all like take responsibility for
00:40:07
for those results
00:40:08
[Music]
00:40:09
is
00:40:11
um this is just me projecting here uh
00:40:13
but is life going to be boring for you
00:40:14
when you retire like your 20s have been
00:40:17
insane right insane you've been playing
00:40:20
for New Zealand the entire time you've
00:40:23
been in Tennessee you've been in
00:40:24
Portugal you've been in Sweden living in
00:40:25
a basement albeit
00:40:30
yeah it's like this is a party that you
00:40:32
wouldn't want to end but then I'm
00:40:33
guessing from your perspective maybe
00:40:34
you're like I just want to you know get
00:40:36
my roots and settle down somewhere yeah
00:40:37
you nailed it honestly
00:40:40
um
00:40:40
I yeah that my 20s were filled with uh a
00:40:45
lot of moving around and that's hard you
00:40:47
know I found it hard doing it
00:40:49
um and a lot of the time my moving was
00:40:52
done
00:40:53
it wasn't my really my choice because of
00:40:55
my injuries most of the time was why I
00:40:57
had to keep finding new contracts
00:41:00
um and then just you know post injury
00:41:04
um even during covert I think I was
00:41:06
coming off
00:41:07
yeah it was after the uh Portugal gig
00:41:12
they had and
00:41:14
um covered her in a lot of women's teams
00:41:16
just lost so much money and I was like
00:41:20
shoot I've got to find a club and I
00:41:22
ended up going playing in Germany
00:41:23
which was a tough stint that was a tough
00:41:26
one I overlooked Germany whereabouts in
00:41:28
Germany doucheburg right why was that I
00:41:31
don't recommend you guys why why was
00:41:33
that tough uh tough coach
00:41:37
very intensive training I mean Germany's
00:41:39
kind of um well known for this the
00:41:42
Bundesliga is a really good league so I
00:41:44
I loved it pushing myself in that
00:41:46
respect it was awesome uh but our team
00:41:48
yeah we weren't that good so
00:41:50
so we were getting beaten a lot and uh
00:41:53
our coach was he was just a maniac to
00:41:57
put it lightly what was it just the like
00:41:59
the just the just the German trains that
00:42:02
everyone speaks of or just an absolute
00:42:03
man yes I'm telling you if you don't
00:42:05
pass it right or you don't you don't
00:42:08
control the ball properly you're running
00:42:10
you're like old school like
00:42:13
no uh emotions allowed just straight out
00:42:18
like
00:42:19
oh I mean it was hell we had a period of
00:42:22
time where it's just snowed for for two
00:42:25
weeks straight and we
00:42:27
just did two hour gym circuits and a
00:42:30
tiny gym about the size of this room
00:42:33
for like two and a half hours like I was
00:42:35
like
00:42:38
what was the purpose like to build like
00:42:41
resilience mental toughness or
00:42:43
absolutely there had to be and then we
00:42:47
um what happened was we got locked down
00:42:50
and in Germany if you lift your house we
00:42:53
had a positive case in our team and we
00:42:55
got uh put on lockdown so we're only
00:42:57
doing Zoom workouts also awful
00:43:01
um
00:43:02
but then we
00:43:05
uh so so if you were if you left your
00:43:09
isolation period because we had to be
00:43:11
stuck inside for two weeks if you lift
00:43:14
that uh and you were caught by the
00:43:16
German authorities leaving your home
00:43:19
um it was like a fifteen thousand Euro
00:43:22
fine or something it was yeah so but the
00:43:24
coach he comes over and he goes
00:43:27
now what you're going to do is you're
00:43:28
going to you guys are going to run but
00:43:29
go at night so they don't get you I'm
00:43:32
just like
00:43:33
dude I'm not doing
00:43:39
it's dead serious he was like you have
00:43:40
to go and run go and run at night I was
00:43:42
like no thanks
00:43:44
that's amazing character building though
00:43:46
hey guys good stories oh insane stories
00:43:49
good stories so when how much longer
00:43:52
have you got in the game uh there's the
00:43:54
World Cup coming up and then there's um
00:43:56
the Olympics next year but it like do
00:43:58
you feel like you're still sort of
00:44:00
peaking as a player or do you feel like
00:44:01
you're over the Apex and on the way yeah
00:44:04
look honestly after my second injury I
00:44:06
was like man I don't know how much more
00:44:08
I've got in me honestly and um
00:44:11
uh playing for Melbourne City my first
00:44:14
season there I actually had a
00:44:15
rejuvenated sort of energy for them for
00:44:19
the game because I I performed really
00:44:21
well I had one of my best seasons and
00:44:24
um that really kind of motivated me a
00:44:26
lot and I thought how awesome like gonna
00:44:28
be heading into a home World Cup in this
00:44:30
form and hopefully carrying it on
00:44:32
um and obviously
00:44:34
you know I did think about taking a
00:44:35
break after this world cup
00:44:37
um from at least Club football as well
00:44:39
but I thought like why would I do that
00:44:41
when I put so much work into it and I
00:44:43
would be peeking for this world cup so
00:44:45
uh looking to sign with City again
00:44:48
um this coming season yeah and uh then
00:44:51
beyond I'm not too sure yeah hopefully
00:44:53
the Olympics maybe but is there um like
00:44:55
is there much money in women's football
00:44:57
like it's only getting bigger and better
00:44:59
but I wouldn't you know I wouldn't say
00:45:01
go and play women's football because
00:45:02
like you get paid Millions like that's
00:45:04
certainly not the case but it's
00:45:06
definitely improving significantly yeah
00:45:09
yeah because I mean you're we'll get to
00:45:12
I mean we've talked about the um the
00:45:14
psychology papers and stuff and I mean
00:45:16
there's you're incredibly smart and
00:45:18
intelligent so your 20s could have been
00:45:20
spent like building up a career and
00:45:22
basically doing anything you [ __ ]
00:45:24
wanted like you know what I mean yeah
00:45:27
totally yeah so yeah so you wouldn't
00:45:29
want to get to the end of your career
00:45:30
and be like 35 or 37 exactly absolutely
00:45:33
nothing to show for which is actually a
00:45:36
massive anxiety for most athletes and
00:45:39
most friends you know that who are
00:45:41
professional athletes is like how the
00:45:43
hell are we supposed to retire and then
00:45:45
be unqualified for basically everything
00:45:48
you know it's a really common thing and
00:45:51
um you know that's why players
00:45:53
associations are so important yeah
00:45:55
because they help give you a lot of Life
00:45:57
advice to help you with scholarships to
00:46:00
study if you haven't done so and work
00:46:02
experience coaching licenses you know
00:46:04
the thought of you know unfortunately
00:46:07
your career can only last as long as
00:46:09
your body can you know so um and for I
00:46:12
think for women's
00:46:13
footballers in particular that's really
00:46:16
important because we're not left with
00:46:18
Millions to say later yeah so
00:46:21
um yeah I think grafting your career
00:46:22
while playing is something that's
00:46:24
highlighted everywhere and it's really
00:46:26
important that people do that yeah what
00:46:28
will you do afterwards psychology do you
00:46:29
think
00:46:31
um
00:46:32
towards that but that's for sure sports
00:46:34
psychology yeah
00:46:36
in the football fields that way I think
00:46:39
if anything I would like to um
00:46:42
you know investigate more uh go more
00:46:46
scientific a little bit maybe more
00:46:47
neuropsychology also with psychology or
00:46:51
sports injuries I find that fascinating
00:46:52
just because of the strategies I kind of
00:46:55
applied I found really really worked for
00:46:57
me and so I would like to kind of
00:46:59
obviously you've studied that further
00:47:01
again what do you mean what were some of
00:47:03
those strategies oh I mean I managed to
00:47:04
sort of um understand a little bit more
00:47:07
about the mechanism of the injury and
00:47:09
understanding what the problem is kind
00:47:11
of naming it to taming it kind of thing
00:47:14
so you understand what's happening yeah
00:47:16
it's cool like you can't understand
00:47:18
what's happened or what's happening to
00:47:21
your injury and then
00:47:23
um
00:47:24
once you learn more about the
00:47:26
physiological side of it and you have a
00:47:27
theoretical understanding of it you
00:47:30
actually can apply a lot with your mind
00:47:32
to those
00:47:34
um we have exercises that you have to do
00:47:36
so for example when you're learning to
00:47:39
run again or retraining your niece that
00:47:43
doesn't swing in
00:47:44
dangerously because what you're wanting
00:47:46
to do is protect that joint at all costs
00:47:49
so when you're doing a movement actually
00:47:51
thinking about the movement to re
00:47:54
energize those connections those
00:47:56
proprioceptive connections so that kind
00:47:59
of aspect I found really really worked
00:48:01
and I think it's really under
00:48:04
um underestimated so I would like to
00:48:06
like obviously learn a little bit more
00:48:07
about it and then also teach people
00:48:10
about it too I don't know how you've
00:48:13
managed to find time favorite thing
00:48:15
so there's the study there's all the
00:48:18
playing that we've talked about the the
00:48:19
various like countries that you've lived
00:48:21
in but then all you follow you on
00:48:23
Instagram there's the extracurricular
00:48:24
stuff as well like you you're a mad
00:48:26
Artist as well like you've done a you've
00:48:29
done a mural at Eden Parker to celebrate
00:48:31
the three the three Women's World Cups
00:48:33
uh cricket rugby and uh and now football
00:48:36
um you design tattoos for people
00:48:39
you're gonna you got any um ink on
00:48:41
yourself that you've designed yeah I do
00:48:43
I do I have one here what is that what's
00:48:45
that it's like a um
00:48:51
that I kind of came up with and Rose and
00:48:55
there's a lily there and just a cool
00:48:58
design I really wanted somewhere
00:49:00
um there's definitely more that I want
00:49:01
you know don't tell my mum though
00:49:05
you designed tennis for other people
00:49:07
right so people can call it I used to do
00:49:09
that or you don't do that anymore I did
00:49:10
that for a long time I've done some of
00:49:12
my teammates ones which I think is so
00:49:14
cool to see that is that's the highest
00:49:16
honor I think hey I think a lot
00:49:18
is I I want to do things
00:49:20
always see if I can do it I like to
00:49:23
challenge myself except with the mural
00:49:24
for example I've always wanted to do the
00:49:26
art that big and have opportunities to
00:49:29
do that and next or another CEO kindly
00:49:32
like said yes go for it and man that was
00:49:35
just such an incredible Challenge and I
00:49:38
just like to push myself in in those
00:49:39
aspects and I always like to yeah just
00:49:43
see how much better I can get at
00:49:45
something do you ever have self-doubt
00:49:47
with these things or oh yes absolutely
00:49:49
yeah definitely so how do you how do you
00:49:51
get over there Human Condition yeah
00:49:54
um
00:49:55
freaking out for a little bit and then
00:49:58
just
00:50:01
um adapting and then coming up with ways
00:50:04
to to solve things like for example with
00:50:05
the Eden Park mural the the space I did
00:50:07
it on was
00:50:09
um almost like Road seal so it was a
00:50:11
terrible surface
00:50:12
lots of unanticipated things like that
00:50:14
and then the paint I used I would have
00:50:16
usually used like a street art paint
00:50:18
that dries quick but
00:50:20
um that the paint they gave me which I'm
00:50:22
thankful they did that was Dulux it was
00:50:24
like furniture paint and it just dripped
00:50:27
down the second you sprayed it so I had
00:50:30
to do some problem solving I freaked out
00:50:32
for a while but then I came up with it
00:50:34
came up with a solution yeah where I use
00:50:37
more stenciling and some um
00:50:40
masking tape kind of ways to keep the
00:50:42
lines
00:50:43
kind and then obviously some paint
00:50:45
obviously helped just normal paint
00:50:46
paintbrush so yeah well your Hat's
00:50:48
really good like there could be money in
00:50:50
that post football if you chose to go
00:50:51
that way you could be like the next
00:50:52
flocks
00:50:54
yeah the next one sorry flux what's that
00:50:56
oh okay I'm taking a point back for that
00:50:58
right for the name
00:51:02
flocks on the other side of this wall
00:51:04
there's a flock so I'm going to show you
00:51:06
afterwards she does like birds cool yeah
00:51:08
she's really oh unbelievable Wilkie
00:51:11
doesn't know four locks unbelievable all
00:51:14
right it's a tie
00:51:16
um what about your surfing you get out
00:51:17
surfing or do you oh yeah do you do you
00:51:20
get told off by um like any
00:51:22
Administration in your team for surfing
00:51:24
or anything like that like as an injury
00:51:26
risk or so so in fact in your clubs like
00:51:30
usually when you sign with the club team
00:51:33
they'll have a little detail in your
00:51:35
contract that you're not allowed to do
00:51:37
certain things but you can't ski or
00:51:39
you're not allowed to snowboard or like
00:51:40
but clubs I mean so far what I've signed
00:51:43
is there's been no detail of that I mean
00:51:45
it says briefly something like you're
00:51:47
not allowed to be Reckless you know
00:51:49
defining those activities so most I
00:51:53
probably could get away with it but
00:51:55
um do you go all right
00:51:57
yeah yeah I mean what size board
00:52:00
uh I usually had a short board that's
00:52:03
slightly smaller than me I haven't been
00:52:06
in so long though I mean it's hard like
00:52:08
with this career it is you do sacrifice
00:52:10
a lot when you when you're a
00:52:12
professional athlete it's an amazing
00:52:13
career and it's just obviously living
00:52:15
the dream but you do sacrifice of course
00:52:17
so um yeah I haven't been for ages yeah
00:52:21
I'm so jealous I I've had a board for
00:52:24
like the last 10 years it's very big
00:52:25
it's like it's probably borderline
00:52:27
stand-up paddleboard and I still can't
00:52:30
get up on it
00:52:31
huge it's me it's massive that's enough
00:52:33
yeah and so what about the music you've
00:52:37
got some songs on Spotify your music's
00:52:39
really good I really like it yeah man I
00:52:41
I actually went through a period there
00:52:43
where I mean I've been playing guitar
00:52:45
for a very long time since like a kid or
00:52:48
yeah since I was about 12 my dad played
00:52:51
so he taught me
00:52:52
and my little brother like played a bit
00:52:54
of bass my older brother plays guitars
00:52:56
anything we kind of did was fostered
00:52:57
within the family which was cool so that
00:52:59
would have been I mean I think it's
00:53:00
never been easier to learn to play
00:53:03
something like a guitar than what it is
00:53:04
now with YouTube tutorials and stuff and
00:53:06
they'd have the fingering in slow motion
00:53:07
and everything like that so
00:53:09
did your Ted did your dad manage to he
00:53:12
obviously managed to teach you okay like
00:53:14
you're pretty good yeah well he he
00:53:15
bought me my first guitar but then I
00:53:17
actually had about a year of lessons
00:53:19
I've always been a kid that wants to get
00:53:21
I'm very stubborn and they ever want to
00:53:23
get good at something I just sat and I
00:53:25
did it until I was you know because I
00:53:27
just was like that we're quite different
00:53:28
I'm a quitter two lessons there I'm done
00:53:32
wow so you just want to improve I think
00:53:34
there was anything creative I really
00:53:37
enjoyed and I thought man that sounds
00:53:39
amazing or that looks so cool I have to
00:53:41
learn how to do it and I just did it
00:53:43
until I did it and uh yeah that first
00:53:45
year lessons I had an amazing guitar
00:53:48
teacher at school
00:53:50
and uh he he made everything very easy
00:53:53
so I recommend if you're starting an
00:53:54
instrument like go actually get lessons
00:53:56
because then it forces you to go a lot
00:53:59
of the reason people don't kind of
00:54:00
continue with the instruments because
00:54:01
they just don't do it enough you know
00:54:03
you have to keep doing it so
00:54:06
um that sort of persistence is needed
00:54:08
and then how long did it take to to get
00:54:11
the confidence to like play in front of
00:54:13
another person like a non-family you
00:54:15
know what I mean it's been a while yeah
00:54:16
and I know yeah I feel like a lot of
00:54:18
people that learn an instrument must
00:54:19
have that a like that's got to be quite
00:54:21
a terrifying thing to yeah to to you
00:54:24
know to like it's a it's a very
00:54:26
vulnerable moment isn't it absolutely
00:54:28
you feel it must be very exposed so can
00:54:30
you remember that moment I
00:54:33
do I think you know any time I've gone
00:54:36
on a tour with New Zealand I'd bring my
00:54:38
guitar and we always have like a signal
00:54:41
something like that if you bring a
00:54:43
guitar on tour like there's going to be
00:54:44
an expectation that you have to play it
00:54:46
to others of course but I kind of
00:54:47
brought it you know it calms me down
00:54:49
that's you know you just wanted to like
00:54:51
practice as a distraction thing in your
00:54:52
room and then with like some of my
00:54:54
friends and we're just mess around you
00:54:55
know
00:54:56
um but yeah playing even in front of
00:54:58
them was like you all automatically
00:55:01
sound terrible
00:55:03
nervous yeah that's awful so that's
00:55:07
always like a yeah a tough part to get
00:55:09
over but it's a it's a good way to
00:55:10
practice
00:55:12
confidence you know and trusting
00:55:14
yourself and your self-esteem and stuff
00:55:16
like that yeah I suppose especially if
00:55:17
you get the validation back yeah that
00:55:19
you're probably just so what were you
00:55:21
doing just like like Ed Sheeran covers
00:55:22
Fleetwood Mac covers no what what yeah
00:55:25
it would be something like that one of
00:55:26
those yeah and then so how do you make
00:55:28
the leap from
00:55:29
um
00:55:30
you know learning to play the guitar
00:55:31
doing covers to writing your own songs
00:55:34
and then putting them on Spotify so when
00:55:38
I was in Sweden the thing is and you
00:55:41
know when we're playing professionally
00:55:42
you you train for about two hours and
00:55:45
then you've got the rest of the day you
00:55:47
know during the week especially if it's
00:55:49
like you know leading up for a game you
00:55:51
have to be ready for a game so those
00:55:52
rest hours I really took advantage of
00:55:55
um and I got pretty serious with my
00:55:57
music because I thought it would be a
00:55:59
place where I would end up I would have
00:56:01
thought you know I could do this you
00:56:03
know I really believed
00:56:04
that I could end up doing that and so
00:56:06
that's where I put a lot of time and
00:56:07
energy into writing music I had a lot of
00:56:10
songs already that I just written over
00:56:11
over the years and decided to record a
00:56:13
couple and yeah just Chuck them on and
00:56:15
just wanted to see how they did and
00:56:18
yeah I've been playing like a little bit
00:56:20
of live gigs here and there like those
00:56:22
few years I haven't done it for a while
00:56:23
honestly it's kind of um an Avenue that
00:56:26
I thought I would actually really go for
00:56:29
it but during the process I actually got
00:56:30
really frustrated it's something about
00:56:32
turning a passion into a profession that
00:56:35
kind of ruins it because they had to
00:56:37
sing the same damn song over and over
00:56:39
again I like I can't hear the song
00:56:41
anymore it drives me nuts I like when
00:56:43
you're recording it when you're
00:56:44
recording it yeah because it's not right
00:56:46
that doesn't sound right that doesn't
00:56:47
sound right over and over and over oh
00:56:49
yeah you're most popular song on Spotify
00:56:51
it's called waiting for the sun
00:56:53
um and it's um lyrically it's really
00:56:56
intense I it's a song about
00:56:59
um waiting for a relationship like a
00:57:01
right the sun is a I think so it's
00:57:03
something like that it was um what do
00:57:04
you mean you think so okay it was so
00:57:06
long ago I'm so old
00:57:10
you're 30 second one you can never sit
00:57:13
down in front of a 50 year old I will
00:57:16
say that's fair you were just talking
00:57:17
about osteoarthritis no but like I I
00:57:20
listened to it a few times on repeat on
00:57:22
my run today and I'm not normally a
00:57:23
lyric person but I I mean so I think I
00:57:26
think it was about like a part or um
00:57:29
going through a really tough
00:57:30
relationship and then finding someone
00:57:31
that was finally like
00:57:34
I've waited for the Sun and it's
00:57:35
happened for me kind of thing because
00:57:37
most of my music I mean like most
00:57:38
artists and most people right when they
00:57:41
feel the most and like you know
00:57:43
relationships of those like we really
00:57:46
have those heightened feelings yeah
00:57:47
obviously it isn't what that was a huge
00:57:49
outlet for me there's a lot of songs
00:57:51
I've written about uh my football and
00:57:53
failures my injuries I've written about
00:57:54
I've got so many songs that I just
00:57:57
haven't
00:57:57
um
00:57:58
I certainly haven't recorded them but
00:58:00
they're definitely somewhere how do you
00:58:03
from someone that's got zero musical
00:58:05
experience or Talent OR ability at all
00:58:07
like how to how do you attend a song
00:58:09
about like football failure into a into
00:58:10
a song like what are some of the lyrics
00:58:12
of that one I
00:58:14
like pretty pretty terms like being
00:58:16
patient and
00:58:18
um
00:58:19
kind of not being a victim in it yeah
00:58:21
controlling what you can and there's a
00:58:23
lot of metaphors you can use you know
00:58:26
what I mean like you can start to get
00:58:27
really artistic with it that way yeah
00:58:29
but honestly you say you can start to
00:58:31
get autistic that way but I think you're
00:58:32
just that way that way sort of um yeah
00:58:36
yeah definitely I think um I think
00:58:39
overall all of that really helped just
00:58:42
my mental health and also just helped my
00:58:46
performance and calming down on the
00:58:48
pitch as an athlete as well and figuring
00:58:50
helps me figure myself out a lot as well
00:58:53
yeah because living away from home is
00:58:54
awful you know it's hard because I do
00:58:57
love my country and I love being home
00:58:59
like now it's being close living in
00:59:01
Australia is a dream yeah so like when
00:59:03
you are living abroad and then your
00:59:05
engine you can't play or like you're not
00:59:07
getting picked to start and you're just
00:59:08
like why the hell did I move this far
00:59:10
you know yeah
00:59:12
um so all of that just helped so much
00:59:15
and as you you mentioned you
00:59:18
um it's good for your mental health it's
00:59:19
your mental health been most mostly good
00:59:20
like obviously apart from the periods
00:59:22
where you've got like knee injuries and
00:59:24
other other thing other you know highs
00:59:27
and lows or lows rather that come along
00:59:28
with being a professional sports person
00:59:29
it's been mostly good yes absolutely
00:59:31
yeah but honestly it has been being a
00:59:34
professional athlete like because
00:59:35
because you're so defined like that yeah
00:59:38
you are um I think one way for me to uh
00:59:42
kind of
00:59:44
not get so bogged down and and being
00:59:46
defined as a professional athlete when
00:59:48
you're injured you're suddenly not that
00:59:49
my music or my creative side really
00:59:52
helped me in that respect because it's
00:59:53
like okay football doesn't actually
00:59:54
Define me it's not the single most thing
00:59:57
that defines who I am I'm also a
00:59:59
creative person
01:00:01
you can relax there's probably other
01:00:03
people that need to worry about being
01:00:04
defined by but you've got plenty of
01:00:06
feathers in your Camp you're good
01:00:08
there's actually like quite a like wide
01:00:10
community of athletes that do have
01:00:12
creative sides is there yeah yeah I have
01:00:15
a couple of Melbourne City teammates
01:00:17
that um
01:00:18
uh photographers I got the some of them
01:00:20
they're graphic designers the Olympic
01:00:24
um the ioc they have like an athlete
01:00:25
artist program yeah and so I met a a
01:00:29
javelin thrower from England Great
01:00:31
Britain who like I kind of connected
01:00:33
with and he does these amazing paintings
01:00:35
he's an insane painter wow so there is
01:00:37
actually like quite a community out
01:00:39
there yeah I love it so cool and the um
01:00:42
the person that waiting for the sun is
01:00:43
about did do you play them the song like
01:00:46
is there a particular person that knows
01:00:49
that song is about I think yeah I think
01:00:50
back then like the person I was dating
01:00:52
at the time didn't know that and that
01:00:53
was pretty special
01:00:55
um do you plant them on like uh on a USB
01:00:58
or a computer or you play it to them
01:00:59
live
01:01:03
because I played it so so
01:01:06
just like on radio okay
01:01:09
with my microphone
01:01:12
um no guys it's one of those like one of
01:01:14
those moments that I suppose very few
01:01:16
people will get to experience in their
01:01:17
life where someone writes a song about
01:01:19
you so I'm just wondering what that
01:01:20
moment's like and what what your
01:01:22
Recollections are of that moment yeah I
01:01:24
think that was like pretty special I
01:01:25
think
01:01:26
um
01:01:27
but I think
01:01:30
it's so
01:01:31
I think it was highly appreciated at the
01:01:34
time and um
01:01:35
I think I've done that a lot of the time
01:01:38
with like Partners I've had and like
01:01:40
just like you would maybe write a love
01:01:42
letter or like take them on a nice date
01:01:44
or just any way to show appreciation
01:01:45
like that's that would be one of my ways
01:01:47
of doing that
01:01:49
um
01:01:50
do you have to do three months before
01:01:52
you get a Hannah song yeah
01:01:54
no I mean at the time I think yeah it
01:01:57
was something that I did frequently but
01:01:59
um oh yeah Taylor Swift just like I know
01:02:02
right like any I think any artist or any
01:02:05
um musician would say the same it's just
01:02:07
like it's a way to feel so you know are
01:02:11
you seeing anyone right now yes my
01:02:12
partner lives in Queensland her name's
01:02:15
Katie how long you guys been together
01:02:16
we've been together over two years now
01:02:19
right is she the one I listened to a
01:02:21
podcast on my run today in preparation
01:02:22
of this this may have been going back
01:02:24
where all right now this was an American
01:02:26
girl you're on the same team
01:02:30
um
01:02:30
that was
01:02:32
my last relationship okay yeah okay yeah
01:02:35
so you and Katie have been together how
01:02:37
long two years just over two years yeah
01:02:38
yeah well amazing yeah so does she play
01:02:41
football as well no she is not remotely
01:02:43
associated with footballs which is like
01:02:45
I think it's very helpful like me and
01:02:47
who could have a good conversation yeah
01:02:48
I think so I think
01:02:52
she actually she would now yeah right
01:02:54
yeah she would now yes yeah but no she's
01:02:56
fantastic
01:02:57
um she actually was she grew up like
01:03:00
dancing she's a dancer what song has she
01:03:02
got did you
01:03:04
she got a song yet I like I said I
01:03:06
haven't done that in so long so
01:03:09
you've been um you've been really uh I
01:03:12
don't want to say um defined but you've
01:03:14
been really open about your sexuality
01:03:16
and you've um you're involved in a
01:03:19
couple of Charities that you know
01:03:20
support like gay rights and stuff like
01:03:22
that yeah um which is really really cool
01:03:25
what was what was that Journey like like
01:03:27
the coming out journey when did you
01:03:28
realize you were gay
01:03:30
when I was probably 18 yeah and
01:03:34
just kind of was in denial for a couple
01:03:36
of years and then
01:03:38
um
01:03:39
kind of told my some teammates of mine
01:03:44
um I went out to a gay bar with a few of
01:03:47
them because that was kind of like they
01:03:49
were just going out there for fun and
01:03:50
then we was listening in Auckland this
01:03:53
is an Auckland yeah this is like family
01:03:54
it must have been family family is a
01:03:56
great time I think it might have been
01:03:57
it's still one of those I don't know if
01:03:59
it was family
01:04:01
um and I said to one of them it was
01:04:05
anyways quite heavily on you you know
01:04:07
when you can't really talk about
01:04:09
um who you're seeing and your new
01:04:11
partner and you're really excited and
01:04:13
it's fresh and it's new but you feel
01:04:14
like you can't you're holding it yeah so
01:04:17
I went up to one of my teammates and I
01:04:19
said like I have to I have to tell you
01:04:21
something and I could tell already when
01:04:23
I say that like she already knows what
01:04:24
I'm gonna say and she goes like oh yeah
01:04:26
what's that and I said well let's just
01:04:28
say it's not entirely
01:04:30
uh
01:04:31
uh it's not entirely
01:04:33
um unreasonable for me to be in this
01:04:35
place was my way of coming out like it
01:04:39
was just so hard to say at the time you
01:04:41
know so much
01:04:43
um
01:04:43
Yeah it's you're so such a my in such a
01:04:47
minority position at that at that point
01:04:49
so sexy you have to build it up to be
01:04:51
such a big thing hey I know so that was
01:04:53
a very terrifying experience like anyone
01:04:55
who's been through it and um I will say
01:04:58
like
01:05:00
looking back like it really if I was was
01:05:03
to give anyone any advice it's just it's
01:05:05
never going to be as bad as you think
01:05:06
ever you know I talked to my best friend
01:05:08
on the team about it
01:05:11
um and any every reaction was perfect
01:05:13
was like is that it like what do you
01:05:15
mean like why are you so nervous and
01:05:17
shaky and crying and it's like that's
01:05:19
great like you know we really were you
01:05:22
were you that like terrified yeah
01:05:24
absolutely yeah
01:05:27
I think now why is that just
01:05:29
overthinking and almost yeah
01:05:30
catastrophizing absolutely you're
01:05:32
thinking like that you're going to be
01:05:34
disowned I mean you know that's
01:05:35
unfortunately the case for a lot of like
01:05:38
kids
01:05:39
um or young young adults sort of come
01:05:42
into terms with themselves and that's
01:05:44
why it's important that we have like a
01:05:46
lot of visibility of um especially if
01:05:48
we've got a platform to show and
01:05:52
celebrate your identity as much as you
01:05:53
can and show you know that you're not
01:05:57
you know it's not uh something to be
01:06:01
chastised over it's not something to to
01:06:03
be you know despite what you might
01:06:06
actually think uh it's yeah I think it's
01:06:10
disappointing when you've got kids who
01:06:12
are suicidal
01:06:13
um because they're just so ashamed of
01:06:15
their identity oh it's outrageous yeah
01:06:17
it's completely outrageous and it but it
01:06:19
also seems outrageous oh man I'm a
01:06:21
middle-aged uh white male so I kind of
01:06:23
have an opinion on on anything like this
01:06:25
but it seems outrageous to me that uh
01:06:27
it's still a thing that you have to make
01:06:28
that announcement like you know what I
01:06:30
mean I never have to stand up in a room
01:06:32
and say Hey I want everyone to know I
01:06:33
mean
01:06:36
yeah totally I think yeah that's that is
01:06:39
a interesting way to put it but I feel
01:06:40
like and and you're Lifetime and
01:06:42
hopefully in my lifetime that'll that'll
01:06:44
change and it's just an announcement
01:06:46
won't have to be made absolutely but I
01:06:47
think um the sort of the point of Pride
01:06:50
and celebrating identity and respecting
01:06:53
and
01:06:54
um feeling really great about who you
01:06:57
are and that's part of the coming out
01:06:59
processes is being able to the more that
01:07:02
that's seen and noticed the more
01:07:05
comfortable that people who are on the
01:07:07
brink of suicide you know
01:07:10
feel about their themselves and there's
01:07:12
no hate for themselves there's no
01:07:14
self-hatred and despite what you've been
01:07:15
conditioned into yeah completely so yeah
01:07:18
and and your your parents and brothers
01:07:20
they were they were handy with it oh
01:07:22
yeah absolutely they even
01:07:24
did they do that thing that I I Campbell
01:07:27
Johnston uh sitting in the same seat as
01:07:29
you're the first oh yeah all black and
01:07:32
he was like his his mum was like yeah
01:07:33
aren't you already and then his dad was
01:07:35
just mumbling about something that was
01:07:36
happening in the duck pond on the farm
01:07:37
like just like zero interest in it at
01:07:40
all same sort of experience for you
01:07:42
similar yeah yeah yeah
01:07:45
um yeah absolutely I think like anywhere
01:07:48
I had absolutely catastrophized it like
01:07:51
you said and I thought it was going to
01:07:52
go such a different way and everybody
01:07:54
who loves me you know still still loves
01:07:57
me and you know doesn't make a
01:07:59
difference and that's that's all that
01:08:01
you want and I think honestly if anybody
01:08:03
goes through this and then they lose
01:08:05
people as a result that shows that you
01:08:07
don't actually need them in your life
01:08:08
yeah [ __ ] them right yeah it's a good
01:08:10
chance for these people to expose
01:08:11
themselves and say okay good so if you
01:08:14
um experienced any homo homophobia or
01:08:16
anything like that
01:08:18
um
01:08:19
I well you've been aware of it even if
01:08:22
it's
01:08:24
you're in Tennessee for is Tennessee
01:08:25
part of the like the Bible Belt right
01:08:28
right um
01:08:29
thankfully
01:08:31
not
01:08:33
well
01:08:35
you do get the odd like
01:08:38
you know
01:08:39
derogatory terms thrown at you when
01:08:41
you're like maybe holding your partner's
01:08:42
hand on the street down in Tennessee for
01:08:45
sure
01:08:46
um I mean I had uh you know black
01:08:49
friends in America that couldn't go to
01:08:51
some parts of Tennessee still
01:08:53
so it was still a place that is just so
01:08:55
okay I can just tip conservative and
01:08:58
ridiculous
01:09:00
um so yeah I've had my fair share but in
01:09:02
the football world no not too bad at all
01:09:05
so I'm really grateful for that
01:09:07
yeah oh that's cool I'm happy to hear
01:09:09
that yeah yeah yeah it's really cool
01:09:12
well I've taken up heaps of your time I
01:09:15
should probably let you well what so um
01:09:17
we're recording this in late June so the
01:09:20
the tournament's about a month away at
01:09:22
the time of recording this what's the
01:09:23
next month gonna look like yeah so we go
01:09:25
into Camp
01:09:27
um
01:09:28
selection is tomorrow so well we get
01:09:31
told tomorrow and then it's publicly
01:09:32
announced on Friday selection is and so
01:09:35
you're in the squad
01:09:36
yeah and
01:09:38
um the 23 Squad of 23 will be named
01:09:41
internally tomorrow
01:09:43
and then publicly on Friday so from
01:09:47
there uh there's a friendly game against
01:09:50
Vietnam and Napier
01:09:52
and then we go into base into Keith Hay
01:09:55
Park
01:09:57
um and then start getting get up really
01:09:59
we have another and um a friendly I
01:10:02
think it's Italy I think it's a closed
01:10:03
match though
01:10:05
um so we've got two like kind of warm-up
01:10:07
games and then go straight into it and
01:10:10
how many what's the story with tickets
01:10:11
how many tickets do you get for each
01:10:12
game so yeah we get like about six each
01:10:15
okay yeah so who's got them mum dad your
01:10:19
two brothers my brothers are actually in
01:10:21
England so I don't think oh okay freeze
01:10:23
up two more tickets yeah
01:10:28
oh my family I got friends coming and
01:10:30
yeah well that's cool that's cool and um
01:10:33
so a good tournament for you it's going
01:10:35
to look like like for Hannah Wilkinson
01:10:37
personally a good tournament what's it
01:10:39
going to look like yeah look I'm um I'm
01:10:42
so stoked honestly it's it's obviously
01:10:44
something that I've been gearing up for
01:10:46
and this is definitely the Pinnacle
01:10:48
event it's the Pinnacle event for a lot
01:10:50
of us so we are really gonna go and
01:10:54
let's go out there and smash it eh it's
01:10:56
gonna be incredible
01:10:57
I can just see like there's fire in your
01:10:59
eye when you talk about it you like you
01:11:02
really light up [ __ ] you're gonna miss
01:11:04
it aren't you yeah you're not like
01:11:06
whenever whenever that time comes
01:11:07
hopefully you get to hopefully get to
01:11:09
end on your own terms rather than with
01:11:11
an injury or something but totally yeah
01:11:14
how does that gonna be like um yeah look
01:11:17
I've thought about that a lot because I
01:11:18
have actually been close to just being
01:11:20
like I can't anymore you know with
01:11:22
injuries and like how knees feel and the
01:11:24
sacrifice uh but yeah in the end it's
01:11:27
your life's work you know so
01:11:30
um and yeah just at least this
01:11:33
tournament is extremely important and
01:11:35
it's an amazing group
01:11:37
um and we're going to be incredible yeah
01:11:39
well and as we've discussed you say it's
01:11:41
your life work but this is just one
01:11:43
chapter of the many chapters that you're
01:11:45
going to have in your life I've got no
01:11:47
doubt about that and I'm really excited
01:11:48
to see what you choose to do next
01:11:50
because it seems like whatever you do
01:11:51
you do Bloody well
01:11:54
thanks Wilkie
01:11:59
[Music]
01:12:13
thank you
