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All Black Kieran Read shares pain of the 2019 World Cup loss | Runners Only! Podcast with Dom Harvey

October 20, 202201:16:38
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hello and welcome to episode 26 of
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Runners only with dom Harvey on this
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episode all black Legend Kieran Reed a
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question
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my whole existence in the game at that
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point
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um and then that night yeah
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um
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lost it
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um
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what is my wife and and kind of Justin
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beard and stuff yeah this guy is pretty
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much Superman he's played 128 test
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matches 52 of him as Captain he was
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named world's best rugby player in 2013
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he won two World Cups four Super Rugby
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titles 11 bled as low cups seven
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trination titles the list goes on and on
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since he hung up the boots he's laced up
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the trail running shoes and has clogged
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up some big K's including a big day out
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on the old ghost all right let's get
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into it Kieran Reed
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[Music]
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[Music]
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[Music]
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[Music]
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Runners only with dom Harvey and Kieran
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Reed Runner there you go okay mate this
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is um it's it's an honor to be um in
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your house sitting at your what is this
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like a casino table yeah it's a poker
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table this is actually a gift for my
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100th test
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um yeah so it's uh
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from uh the players the rest of my team
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so um tipped in and I got this made up
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and yeah pretty cool pretty special play
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some poker or 500 or whatever you want
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to play on here so at the moment it's a
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work desk so what a gift what a gift um
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and it's his um it's got your number
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there 1083.
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yeah jeez
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no so we're sitting in what do you call
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this it's like a man cave a shrine yeah
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I think um it's called the games room so
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I'm not sure like you know I've got you
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know a few things up here I probably
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since I've retired I can actually afford
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like I never wanted to put up
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memorabilia while I was still playing
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like all the jerseys you kind of get and
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and things a few things you're gifted
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which I've put up here um well you see
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you're okay with it now but you weren't
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okay with it when you were still playing
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yeah I just felt a little bit weird
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having
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something that was up here talking about
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my career and I was still playing you
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know it felt like I should wait until
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I've actually finished and then and then
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maybe put it up so I'm all right now
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when when my girls get a bit older I can
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bring um their prospective boyfriends in
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here and just uh show them around so I'm
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looking forward to that yeah well you
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must um you must look back now with the
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benefit of hindsight and uh just be
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immensely proud of what you did I
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suppose when you when you when you're in
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it especially for as long as what you
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were you probably don't really have time
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to pause you're just thinking about the
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next the next game or the next season or
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whatever but you must look back now and
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go [ __ ] I did some [ __ ] yeah it is it's
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strange because I think um yeah honestly
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when you're in it you're just going
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through it and you're just doing what
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you need to do it's um you know it's not
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about kind of yeah what you're doing
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it's more just hey what's what's next so
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um for me it was
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I've had time to reflect a little bit I
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think you still like I'm not really that
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person that's going to look back and go
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wow that was amazing or you know
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but you know it's like yeah it was cool
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and it was uh you know all part of it
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now I um Googled you yesterday when I
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was doing some research and uh you
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Google your name and one of the first
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thing that comes up now is Kieran read
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weight loss
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honestly I'm not sure but I think
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everyone it's the first thing if they
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haven't seen me in person since I played
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rugby I've lost over 10 kgs yeah just
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muscle just muscle I don't know it's
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just muscle probably a bit of fat too
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because it yeah
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um running so I am running yeah yeah we
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are getting into that you're doing more
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than just a little bit of literally no
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I've done no weights literally haven't
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picked up a dumbbell or done any weight
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since I've finished
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um you know because I guess you for so
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long you're forced into a gym I had to
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work quite hard to keep my weight on
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when I was playing so you know I'm
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probably naturally about the size maybe
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um anyway so yeah eating lots getting in
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the gym working hard supplements shakes
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all the stuff that you Chuck in your
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body just so you can go and perform on
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the weekend yeah
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um so it was it's a brilliant thing you
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know you finish and then suddenly I
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don't have to worry about that stuff so
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obviously eating a bit less and
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um but I think it's definitely been you
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know I'm not I'm running I'm not running
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ridiculous amounts but oh I think you
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just I'm gonna have to stop you you're
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you're um this is just um classic Karen
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Reed modesty um you um you ran like a
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large chunk of the old ghost old ghost
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Road last year like 55 kilometers of it
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yeah so yeah we did don't you dare tell
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me you're doing a little bit it's an
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ultra marathon yeah I know which was
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which was unbelievable because that was
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about
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three months after I got back to New
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Zealand and with no real training I've
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done 20K was my most before that about
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two weekends beforehand every couple
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weekends before and so the two of those
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runs
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and then yeah the 55k was unbelievable
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I'll go through it was amazing yeah just
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the whole track and just being out in
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the wilderness so yeah it's pretty cool
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for a mate's 40th
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um
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you know we got helicoptered into the
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top the ghost Hut and then we ran out to
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sedanville um and just it was just
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remarkable way like tell you what 30k
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like once the past 20 guys like this is
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the first round got some 30k I'm feeling
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all right after 20 you're sort of known
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territory yeah you are yeah and I was
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like yeah this is actually okay like it
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was
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um going okay it worked out quite well
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so me and another girl we got choppered
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in first with the mate who was kind of a
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ringing on a bike so we all kind of um
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we took off and then the actual Runners
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um arrive you know what do you mean the
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actual oil is they they arrived oh
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they're just fitter than us all right
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for a few minutes later
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um
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or you know 20 minutes later 30 minutes
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later and so we took off and we didn't
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actually you know know so they didn't
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catch us to about
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um
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30k in and we're like we thought they'd
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catch us after an hour so and we're just
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you know going doing our thing and then
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we're like oh we'll stay ahead of them
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now we might as well just keep going and
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then it's probably coincided when they
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caught us at about 30k and then my body
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just shut down and it was a tough 10K
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there and then and then managed to
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um
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run out yeah run basically run out the
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last 10K but for about 10K it was it was
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a decent walk track a for a while but oh
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man it was good well I'm um I've been um
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signed up to do the old ghost Ultra for
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the last two years but due to covert I
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haven't been able to so next year's the
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year and I'm off Thursday about 85ks oh
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amazing mate it's awesome so what I did
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I went back so I went backwards so I
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went downhill so you're going up there
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so
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um that's the whole thing I was thinking
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about I know um Scotty J quite well in
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Stevenson and so and he's done it a
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couple times and I'm like the whole time
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I was thinking this is ridiculous and I
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was going downhill I was like man the
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85k you're going uphill for the 55 that
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we did basically up here although you
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know there are certain bits up and down
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and then you've got that 20K out yeah um
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have you got any desire to do the actual
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living the whole 85
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um I actually yeah probably more so
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something like that than a marathon
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probably
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um I don't know it's just so trails are
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definitely more fun
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a bit more yeah fun like if I run around
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here it's
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you know if I'm just running on the road
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I struggle a little bit
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um just been up to I don't know what it
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is but the body and everything
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um where it's just been up on a trail
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just doing different paces and things
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like that you know downhill uphill and
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maybe walk in a bit and all that seems
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to seems to fit a bit nicely for me yeah
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there's no shame in walking on the
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trails what what um why did you
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gravitate towards Rowling I strike me
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so there's
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all my teammates would have said there
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is no way that I would go running and
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there's no way I was going to go running
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but I don't know so now my kind of
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um you know friend group around which is
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based around I guess our kids and
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um the parents of our of our kids
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friends and stuff
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um they're all into it so they'll uh
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all kind of you know Runners but just
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weekend worries I guess in some aspects
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um but decent Runners and stuff and do a
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bit of Adventure races into a few like
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couple of them done Kepler and
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um and things like that so I guess for
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me it's like well to stay connected and
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you know you got to go out there and do
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it with them so yeah it's gonna enjoy
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them yeah and it's like I kind of when
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you stop you kind of you you
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um you miss that little bit of
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camaraderie you know like that's the
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thing I definitely miss most about not
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playing
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um is the fact that you you tune up with
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your mates every day and uh you know
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laughing and doing all that so getting
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out and going for a run with them if you
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know every couple weekends or something
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um you know it was a bit of fun so ended
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up doing that and I actually enjoy it
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because it was totally different to what
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I've done for 20 years so our
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competitive are you as a person I
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suppose what I mean is obviously like
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when you when you're all black or black
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Captain you're super competitive and
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losing is the worst thing ever are you
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able to just like run for fun and yeah
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yeah I am so I literally I've gone
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as you said like so competitive for so
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long and everything and yes I'm
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competitive in certain things
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but I actually don't need a
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um no I don't need to have that moment
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of real competitive satisfaction to get
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me going you know like yeah yeah you
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know I'm just like I don't need to find
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that anymore you know I've had it for so
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long so
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I can go out for a run until like
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um around home here I'm probably
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competitive against myself a little bit
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especially on like my shorter runs when
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you you know if you just go out the back
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here for six or eight K you can't always
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check in we're not checking your time
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but you're kind of wanting to make sure
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you you do a good time but yeah of
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course up in the hills I know which is a
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good thing though for me is that the
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guys who I run with are faster than me
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so for me it's like I I can't like it's
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good just catch me but I don't I don't
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need to try and compete um and so that's
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all good and um yeah quite quite just
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enjoy it just feel the garden and clear
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the head really like yeah
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I I have to do something and because I'm
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not a big you know guy to go get in the
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weights and things it was like
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if I have a couple days of doing no
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exercise again it's um it's you know I
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just don't feel feel right you know yeah
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oh mate I I 100 resonate with what
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you're saying like for me running is um
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yeah the mental health benefits are
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probably outweigh the physical health
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benefits from being honest yep the
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mental Clarity you get from it is I
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think it's true eh yeah absolutely yeah
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it does it's during the time as well
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when you're running I guess you'd feel
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that but then it's
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just clears you it clears your head and
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clears your mind and you can come back
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and
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and kind of do the rest of your day or
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do whatever it is or you know resets you
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yeah and you so you said you were a
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little bit competitive within yourself
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when you're running around here what
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sort of place are we talking like a five
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minute K Pace yeah four something yeah
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five minute okay so so
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a couple years ago when I still plan and
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I came back and I was like I'll do some
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running I was locked down so
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um I've got a 6K Loop out the back here
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um
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which is kind of on a little bit of a
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trail
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um and it's uh for me I was like started
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about six minute case five case and this
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is when you're playing rugby and you're
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like man but just running was just
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foreign to me yeah and so I just worked
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that down I wanted to get under the five
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minute case for this 6K and so I got I
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did one run 4 15. oh that's a done so
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I've done so then I didn't have to run
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that trail that run next 6K again
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um and so I've done that and then I just
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progress if I'm not even worrying about
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the
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the times to then just go in a bit
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further you know like yeah you know
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going there's a nice there's awesome
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Trails here in the forest couple of 10K
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type loops and stuff and you know you're
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ready for an hour and
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um yeah and doing it so it's like okay
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and so yeah I'll
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you know
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I'll be if I want to run fast between 4
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30 and 5. um you know between four five
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to tenk
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um
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so you know but if I run my
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bit longer I'll definitely be slowing
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down yeah I don't think I kind of hit
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the wall after about that I reckon yeah
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so not that it would bother you at all
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but Richie would smoke you in a 10K yeah
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yeah oh yeah yeah but see I spent 10
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years getting smoked by him and running
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sessions every day oh is that right yeah
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what sort of running was involved when
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you're um when you're in all black like
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do you do like a 1 000 meter or three
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thousand meter or no it's no distance
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really it's all based on intervals
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interval stuff so it's so you've got a
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Rugby field
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um so it's all based off kind of 100
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meters shuttles so you might do
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a 200 meter run rest and then do 50
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meters or back and forth on the 22 you
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know eight times or something
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um
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and doing it under time pressure so do
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it and say
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you know
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you know 100 meters or 200 meters and 40
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seconds and then
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20 seconds rest and then doing it again
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kind of thing it's all under fatigue so
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it's all kind of yeah at high intensity
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um and so you know rich is a he's a
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runner
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and I wasn't
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um so if I was kind of in his shadow and
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over that period Then I knew I was real
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fit yeah yeah so
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um that was pretty motivating to be able
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to train with someone like that and yeah
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you know and and if like so for a long
00:13:59
basically every day you know work
00:14:01
together doing that stuff so um it was
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good it's amazing following like both of
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you guys post rugby because I I sort of
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remember I'm a bit older than you but it
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seemed like when I was growing up every
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professional sports person that retired
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got fat or got back you and Richard
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you're leaner and trimmer and fitter
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than what you ever have been yeah I
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think so I think it was the same looking
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at it so I've uh you go one of two ways
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I think
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I think that is that is legitimately it
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you know
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um and
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there's a lot of man there's a lot of
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big props who have who have really
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trimmed down a and got and got in really
00:14:36
good shape
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um and so I don't know I think it's just
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a case of
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maybe now because it's been we live
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professional lives
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um you know you understand the benefits
00:14:48
of it all and
00:14:49
um you know and what you're doing and
00:14:51
um and maybe your body too realizes hey
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if you stop you're going to be in all
00:14:55
sorts so you may as I keep going while
00:14:57
you can yep how is your body now like
00:14:59
you you've um you had um we're gonna get
00:15:03
into your career soon and uh what a
00:15:05
career it was but you um it's amazing
00:15:06
that you played so many tests because
00:15:07
you had so many injury breaks didn't you
00:15:09
over the years
00:15:10
yeah body's actually really good yeah
00:15:12
um so touchwood really it's um
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it's in Great Neck like I finished
00:15:17
playing a year ago
00:15:20
um I came back with a real dodgy knee
00:15:22
like my knee is probably the worst thing
00:15:24
and that will go first and so the first
00:15:26
few months when I kind of stopped
00:15:28
playing you know it gave me you know
00:15:30
real hell you know like and it was but
00:15:32
then just from running like I could run
00:15:35
and be fine and then I'd be around home
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and I'd you know played soccer or
00:15:38
something out in the backyard and I'd do
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my knee and and like hobble away I mean
00:15:43
you know and then it would kind of click
00:15:44
back in place and carry on and I was
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like oh but and it just slowly
00:15:48
progressed and got better and better
00:15:49
yeah I think you know you lose a bit of
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weight and
00:15:53
I'm not putting as much stress on it and
00:15:55
you know I've got a disc that I've you
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know
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um balls in my back and had surgery on
00:16:00
and
00:16:01
that's something that's going to be a
00:16:03
worry at some point again probably
00:16:06
um but at the moment I'm feeling really
00:16:08
good so this just kind of nothing really
00:16:11
that's stopping me yeah
00:16:13
yeah so but I can go for these runs like
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go for those long runs and you know feel
00:16:18
tired and sore and everything but but
00:16:20
anything that requires Pace or power
00:16:24
even with the kids you know you finish
00:16:27
that you go oh I'm so sore that night
00:16:30
and stuff yeah how did I do this yeah so
00:16:33
so your career
00:16:35
um you're the third most kept all black
00:16:37
ever who's ahead of you by the way uh so
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Richie and KIVI
00:16:42
um right yeah uh he's a five or so
00:16:45
actually I think I think now Sam
00:16:48
whitelock is just ahead of me right I
00:16:50
believe maybe or maybe that's equal or
00:16:52
just past me so yeah I might just slip
00:16:54
down so 128 tests 52 of them is Captain
00:16:58
um two Rugby World caps well by the way
00:17:00
interrupt if I get nothing wrong here
00:17:02
um four Super Rugby titles
00:17:04
yep yep that's the one here um eleven
00:17:06
bleeders low carbs I don't know every
00:17:08
year
00:17:10
and uh world's best player in 2013. yeah
00:17:16
um when do you realize um because I I
00:17:18
suppose the the big mile centers first
00:17:20
of all like being named and making the
00:17:22
All Blacks when do you realize that
00:17:24
you're you're a good or black I don't
00:17:26
know I think maybe when you
00:17:30
maybe when you just
00:17:32
feel like
00:17:33
if you do what you do you're going to be
00:17:36
playing you know maybe if you're playing
00:17:37
consistently for the team is probably
00:17:39
when you realize that
00:17:41
um you know if I want I can be here for
00:17:44
a long time yeah and so for me that
00:17:46
might have been around
00:17:48
just before 2011 maybe you know like
00:17:51
in 2010 after a few years yeah maybe
00:17:54
but you still just want to keep pushing
00:17:56
yourself you know in that environment so
00:17:59
um
00:18:00
yeah it's a it's a strange one I think
00:18:02
when you play first you're just like wow
00:18:04
that's amazing and it's just like it's
00:18:05
kind of like addictive a little bit that
00:18:08
you just want to
00:18:09
um keep pushing yourself as much as you
00:18:11
can and try and try and find what's you
00:18:13
know the limit is for yourself and and
00:18:15
obviously
00:18:17
the motivating factor is the team and
00:18:19
how amazing it is to to play for you
00:18:22
know for you for your nation and in a
00:18:25
team like the all back so oh and what
00:18:27
I'm okay so um yeah 128 test 52 is
00:18:30
Captain What's um what's the difference
00:18:33
in terms of pressure between just being
00:18:34
a player and being a captain well what's
00:18:36
what's the difference you have to excuse
00:18:37
my ignorance I've got no idea no no
00:18:39
honestly it's actually massive yeah like
00:18:43
what admin wise or yeah just everything
00:18:45
really like I think um
00:18:48
um yeah when you're playing like it's
00:18:50
let's
00:18:51
you know yes you you care about the team
00:18:53
and and you're worried about things
00:18:55
um
00:18:56
but you can kind of Park that I guess
00:18:57
once you've finished trainings and stuff
00:18:59
and you go home back to hotel and play
00:19:00
guys play Playstation go for cards
00:19:02
whatever
00:19:03
um whereas I found when as soon as I was
00:19:05
named captain
00:19:07
um that was very hard to
00:19:10
remove
00:19:12
the game from your mind
00:19:14
and so yep there's all these extra
00:19:16
things you've got to do around media and
00:19:17
and admin and stuff and all this extra
00:19:20
responsibility
00:19:22
um which is actually doable that's not
00:19:23
the hard part yeah it's the it's the
00:19:25
part that
00:19:27
um get some trenched in your mind about
00:19:28
the game all you're thinking about is
00:19:31
how we can do this better and so you'll
00:19:33
come back from training you can't just
00:19:34
sit in your hotel and watch you know
00:19:36
Netflix or something you'll be thinking
00:19:38
oh we should be doing this or what if we
00:19:41
did this or that and you and so
00:19:44
because as Captain I guess the
00:19:46
responsibility is more you know more on
00:19:47
your shoulder so I really respect you
00:19:49
know what Richie did and understood you
00:19:51
know that
00:19:52
um
00:19:53
difficult you could kind of tell because
00:19:55
it was hard to be
00:19:57
um
00:19:58
I guess so I had some coffee yeah switch
00:20:01
off and and so it was really about
00:20:02
trying to find spaces to make sure you
00:20:04
did switch off so
00:20:06
um I kind of got to the point where I
00:20:07
was like yeah actually structuring those
00:20:09
those times to
00:20:11
um to switch off and find that balance
00:20:13
especially when you're on tour like when
00:20:14
I was at home it's it's a bit easier but
00:20:16
yeah um
00:20:17
you know when you're on tour and stuff
00:20:19
you can just get stuck in a bit of a
00:20:20
loop um but getting out playing cards
00:20:22
going for a walk with the lads dinner
00:20:24
and stuff like that so
00:20:25
yeah you maybe that's something that um
00:20:28
compartmentalizing maybe that's
00:20:29
something that you managed to do better
00:20:30
than Richie because everyone I've spoken
00:20:32
to says Richie never had a conversation
00:20:34
about anything other than rugby yeah
00:20:36
yeah and it's it's fear and I think it's
00:20:39
you know
00:20:41
he was so did that's what made him so
00:20:44
good yeah and what a lot of people is
00:20:46
and it's like well
00:20:48
um you know he had no kids he had when
00:20:51
he was kept in he he only had a partner
00:20:53
for like the last
00:20:55
couple years
00:20:56
um so his 100 Focus was rugby and yep I
00:21:02
was you know when you're there and in
00:21:03
the moment you're doing that and you're
00:21:04
giving you all and feel like you're
00:21:06
giving just as much
00:21:08
um but there's other things in life when
00:21:10
you've got you know two kids and I had
00:21:12
three kids I had my third when I was
00:21:14
kept in and you just things are slightly
00:21:17
different in perspective I guess in that
00:21:18
way and and maybe also the type of
00:21:20
person I was anyway it was um so I
00:21:23
valued certain things and as
00:21:26
leaders in terms of connection and
00:21:28
creating um
00:21:29
you know connections and teams so
00:21:32
um yeah but I totally
00:21:34
man understand how how stressful it is
00:21:38
though and so I think I you know if you
00:21:40
talk to people around me I think I would
00:21:42
have probably changed even though I I
00:21:43
hoped I didn't but there's certain
00:21:45
things that you know certainly change it
00:21:47
because it's um
00:21:48
yeah there's a bit of pressure there 100
00:21:50
yeah um yeah what made you a good
00:21:53
Captain I mean uh 52 tests as Captain as
00:21:56
[ __ ] it's mind-blowing what made you
00:21:58
good ah
00:21:59
man I don't know I'm not gonna I can't
00:22:01
answer this now it's like you um you're
00:22:03
like you're the most modest person you
00:22:05
could ever ever ever made but can't you
00:22:07
now like look back and go okay this is
00:22:09
why I was good well yeah like I can look
00:22:11
back and and pinpoint certain things
00:22:13
that I think I was good at yeah but like
00:22:16
I don't I'm not gonna stand here
00:22:18
but look I think it is it is a basis of
00:22:22
who I was like I didn't I wasn't trying
00:22:24
to be someone I wasn't I think I was
00:22:26
pretty lucky to come into the kit and
00:22:28
see after
00:22:29
you know I was
00:22:30
you know already nearly 80 tests played
00:22:33
you know I'd kept in the team already
00:22:34
about 10 times or so before I was
00:22:36
actually named captain
00:22:38
um and so I wasn't trying to prove
00:22:40
anything I was going in there genuinely
00:22:42
being who I was as a as a person as a
00:22:45
leader and then going in there and doing
00:22:47
it
00:22:48
for this team that I was really
00:22:49
passionate about and actually helping
00:22:52
people was probably one of my things
00:22:54
that gives me a real you know
00:22:56
I'll get a real big kick out of doing
00:22:58
that yeah um and and still do a little
00:23:00
bit
00:23:01
um now definitely and so I had this team
00:23:03
that was different to the team I'd been
00:23:05
involved in beforehand with all these
00:23:06
young guys coming in and and then you
00:23:08
just want the team to do well and I
00:23:10
think are you just for me it's it's
00:23:12
putting a bit of their ego aside and I
00:23:14
think maybe that's what it did well as a
00:23:16
captain and also probably
00:23:18
um similar to what Richie was is that I
00:23:20
could
00:23:22
make decisions and stay pretty calm and
00:23:24
you know with all the stuff that's
00:23:26
happening out in the field like it
00:23:28
you know I was able to kind of just
00:23:31
Park a lot of that stuff and just be
00:23:33
able to go out there and yeah do my role
00:23:35
yeah yeah I think so and I think that
00:23:37
really helps um
00:23:39
you know um being able to drive a team
00:23:41
around the field if you're in that space
00:23:43
you know yeah but you you must have seen
00:23:46
um so much change in your your time as
00:23:48
an all black like over a decade in terms
00:23:50
of um I'm thinking like uh you know
00:23:52
vulnerability and stuff like that
00:23:54
um your book one of the one of the one
00:23:56
of the best rugby books I've ever read
00:23:57
straight eight it's just it's very
00:23:59
honest and very raw I'm guessing um oh
00:24:02
no we've got to get into that yeah that
00:24:04
was it was it quite different in the all
00:24:06
black fold like when you started in
00:24:07
terms of um I I caught up with um your
00:24:10
teammate Zach Guildford yesterday and he
00:24:11
said in his early days of the All Blacks
00:24:14
like I'd never show any vulnerability
00:24:15
because I didn't want people to think
00:24:16
he's a [ __ ] yeah um was it sort of like
00:24:18
that when you started yeah look I think
00:24:20
it was I think you know as in some ways
00:24:22
I was lucky because I did
00:24:24
you know I caught the end of that
00:24:26
maybe a bit more of that old school
00:24:28
um mentality yeah was it like when you
00:24:30
started like that so when I did see
00:24:31
mentality a little bit yeah all blacks
00:24:34
was probably starting to change a lot so
00:24:35
this was 2008 after
00:24:38
you know what had happened in 07 and
00:24:41
um maybe a bit more responsibility was
00:24:42
being put on the players
00:24:43
um when I first came back into the All
00:24:45
Blacks
00:24:46
um and so it was it was changing but
00:24:48
there was still a bit of okay you know
00:24:51
you show respect first and you do this
00:24:53
and do that and then it happens but um
00:24:57
I think the All Blacks were ahead of the
00:24:59
game
00:25:01
in terms of
00:25:02
you know Graham Henry who got
00:25:04
reappointed and the coaches went Smith
00:25:06
and all them
00:25:07
um actually said to our players that
00:25:10
it's time for you to take over the game
00:25:12
so our leaders in there we're pretty
00:25:13
damn good like led by Richie and a lot
00:25:16
of those guys giving me Lamy was pretty
00:25:17
massive and
00:25:19
and uh and being kind of the conduit
00:25:21
between the younger players and the old
00:25:23
and right
00:25:24
um so
00:25:27
it was
00:25:28
yeah I'm not I'm still gonna say when I
00:25:31
first came in I was walking around on
00:25:32
eggshells
00:25:34
here and [ __ ] scared about doing
00:25:36
anything wrong right because you're like
00:25:37
um you're like the lowest ring yeah yeah
00:25:39
yeah and so you are and I think you
00:25:41
probably still are coming in but I think
00:25:43
you know as a young player now but maybe
00:25:46
the young players coming in now are just
00:25:48
a bit more confident a bit more kind of
00:25:49
yep more assured of themselves because
00:25:52
they've been
00:25:54
um brought up in these environments that
00:25:56
uh
00:25:57
pretty professional like even the school
00:25:59
games just ridiculously professional and
00:26:01
stuff so you know if I look when they
00:26:04
come in at 20 they're not as daunted or
00:26:05
whatever maybe I'm not sure but
00:26:08
um
00:26:09
yeah I what you wanted to create like so
00:26:12
when I was Captain for my last four
00:26:13
years was an ability where I could
00:26:15
someone came and knew I would purposely
00:26:18
go and have a conversation not about
00:26:20
footy with those guys and and just
00:26:22
really
00:26:23
get to know them on a more personal
00:26:25
level and it could just be one simple
00:26:28
conversation because you you know
00:26:30
um there might be a few of them and and
00:26:32
just connection yeah and purely and
00:26:35
simple you know doing that and then just
00:26:37
trying to make them feel a bit more
00:26:38
comfortable and I think it was
00:26:40
yeah definitely done more so when I
00:26:42
finished then when I first came in it
00:26:44
was more just yep okay you're here you
00:26:46
need to fit into What's
00:26:48
um what's happening
00:26:50
and you don't really ask too many
00:26:51
questions
00:26:53
um whereas when I finished it was
00:26:55
okay guys
00:26:56
um be yourself here we want you to be
00:26:58
yourself and we want you to ask
00:26:59
questions if you know if you don't know
00:27:02
or if you need some help and I'm going
00:27:04
to get to know you and it's not up to
00:27:06
you to get to know the older players up
00:27:07
to the older players to get to know you
00:27:09
kind of thing Ah that's so healthy yeah
00:27:11
it's so good so yeah so your book
00:27:14
straight eight which was um co-written
00:27:16
with um Scotty Stevenson how does how
00:27:18
does that partnership work how does how
00:27:20
does that work does does he sit down and
00:27:22
interview you for hours Yeah man so it
00:27:24
was it was interesting actually so it's
00:27:26
it's a bit like doing a very long long
00:27:28
form vodka
00:27:30
um it was just hours and hours of of
00:27:33
talking and I guess I can talk a little
00:27:35
bit and go on and so yeah he did a lot
00:27:37
of um listening I actually think I put
00:27:39
him to sleep one time
00:27:41
he was under a bit of stress like it
00:27:44
when was it I think he's doing
00:27:47
um you know cricket and everything and
00:27:49
all this different stuff at the time so
00:27:51
and I'll just hit just um
00:27:54
we just be on the phone or if we meet
00:27:56
face to face and
00:27:57
um and I'll just talk for an hour or so
00:28:00
and just block it out and do do lots and
00:28:02
lots like that so yeah it was um it was
00:28:04
a lot of
00:28:05
a lot of fun
00:28:06
um to go over things and I just wanted
00:28:09
to make sure it was a true
00:28:10
representation and
00:28:12
um
00:28:13
I guess uh what you go through yeah yeah
00:28:15
all right and when you read the book
00:28:17
back do you feel like you've written it
00:28:19
yourself I do I do yeah yeah it did it
00:28:22
did and so doing it with Scotty was you
00:28:24
know purposeful as well because I do
00:28:26
know I'm quite well and and we're good
00:28:28
mates so
00:28:29
and you know I thought he's a great
00:28:32
writer yeah he's probably
00:28:34
he's amazing at what he does
00:28:36
um and so he did get my yeah my feel and
00:28:39
it does feel like when I read it it's as
00:28:41
if I've written it myself so um yeah
00:28:44
very thankful for that yeah yeah um yeah
00:28:46
there's a few things in the book that I
00:28:48
um that I'd really like to unpack it for
00:28:50
you if you're Keen to Yes um on the
00:28:52
assumption that a lot of people listen
00:28:53
to this wouldn't have wouldn't have read
00:28:54
the book and hopefully after hearing
00:28:56
this I want to go out and buy it but you
00:28:58
talk about crying on three occasions
00:28:59
there's um a head injury a thumb injury
00:29:02
in the the Christchurch earthquake yeah
00:29:05
um what's the thumb injury that seems
00:29:07
like a random one oh thumb injury yeah
00:29:08
what was that um
00:29:10
that was
00:29:12
um just before the lion Series so it was
00:29:15
in South Africa uh bloomfontein
00:29:18
um the heart of the velt up there and um
00:29:22
you know just for half time Crusaders
00:29:24
game against Cheetos
00:29:27
um and uh you know just bust my thumb
00:29:29
and I knew something was bad and we were
00:29:32
playing the lion series was maybe eight
00:29:34
weeks away six weeks eight weeks away
00:29:37
and I just thought the worst a little
00:29:39
bit at that moment
00:29:41
um so you get taken back to the shared
00:29:43
kind of everyone comes I'm sitting there
00:29:45
and at half time everyone comes in
00:29:47
and kind of
00:29:49
you know the team comes in and you just
00:29:51
don't want to give any emotion away to
00:29:52
the team because they come and sleep on
00:29:53
the back are you all good and I was like
00:29:55
yeah I'm all good all good but no you
00:29:56
know your facts no yeah yeah pretty much
00:29:58
[ __ ] and then you go
00:30:01
um and then basically kind of just
00:30:03
keeping all this emotion and then
00:30:05
suddenly as soon as all the boys go back
00:30:06
out for second half I was just like just
00:30:09
lost it and it's more a case of kind of
00:30:11
knowing what potentially you could miss
00:30:14
out on I think and just and I'll just
00:30:16
come back from a bit of injury as well
00:30:18
um
00:30:19
so it was
00:30:20
um
00:30:21
my wrist injury so it was kind of all
00:30:24
that emotion that gets pent up and you
00:30:26
know at that moment it just seems so
00:30:28
massive yeah and then you go so it's
00:30:31
pretty awesome man surf because a crazy
00:30:34
place in in so many different ways but
00:30:36
it is amazing in other ways so
00:30:39
um
00:30:40
the liaison officer I think drove me to
00:30:42
the hospital Private Hospital
00:30:44
in bloemfontein at you know nine o'clock
00:30:46
at night on a Saturday and uh he
00:30:50
on basically the docs here x-ray
00:30:54
um you need surgery
00:30:55
and we'll get up this surgeon he'll come
00:30:58
from wherever he's been so if he hasn't
00:31:00
had too many beers before he turned up
00:31:02
but he comes in and he just said to me
00:31:05
before so the surgeon comes in that
00:31:06
night at about midnight I'm having
00:31:08
surgery and purely because I said you've
00:31:11
got to have it done if you don't if you
00:31:12
wait till you get home it's another week
00:31:14
because of swelling from a um thing and
00:31:17
you might miss the series he's like
00:31:19
kitten I promise you
00:31:22
you'll be playing against the Lions
00:31:25
and like that's what you know so he knew
00:31:27
everything about it he's like I'll fix
00:31:29
you do not worry and um by the way
00:31:31
that's a good voice you do oh it's a
00:31:33
good South African yeah I've spent about
00:31:35
a year of my life in South Africa so I
00:31:37
should should be able to get it but you
00:31:39
know and so
00:31:40
going in there and then just spending it
00:31:42
and then so like spending the night in
00:31:44
the South African Hospital
00:31:46
by yourself kind of the dot because
00:31:49
you're all drugged up and everything you
00:31:51
know you don't have your phone or
00:31:52
anything so I'm literally you literally
00:31:54
just just there because the doc had
00:31:56
taken it away You're you know worried
00:31:57
about
00:31:58
people taking things while you're you
00:32:01
know just lying there so
00:32:03
um yeah it was a a strange time but then
00:32:06
I think you know
00:32:08
you just
00:32:09
in some ways you go okay what's next and
00:32:11
you go okay I've got to get this right
00:32:12
and then you just do it it needs to be
00:32:13
done yeah um and then I came back just
00:32:16
for that first test it's my next game
00:32:18
um
00:32:19
yeah so it was pretty it you know it
00:32:21
works out in the end yeah of course it
00:32:24
does but I suppose at the time it seems
00:32:26
like it's the end of the world yeah yeah
00:32:27
and it's man there's some
00:32:30
I think just knowing different things
00:32:32
like injuries are tough
00:32:33
um I think he's mentioned that
00:32:35
concussion I had oh yeah they want to
00:32:38
talk about that um and also the the
00:32:40
Christchurch earthquake so where were
00:32:42
you
00:32:43
so
00:32:45
2010 at home
00:32:47
um wife pregnant when that kind of big
00:32:49
one shook but what you know I didn't
00:32:51
really think that's the one that was in
00:32:52
the middle of the night yeah yeah
00:32:55
kind of jump out of bed you know and
00:32:57
then we'd leave the next you know
00:32:59
this week a few days later to go to
00:33:01
Aussie to play and
00:33:03
um
00:33:03
kind of didn't sense what an earthquake
00:33:06
was then I guess because a few chimneys
00:33:08
fell down whatever then um
00:33:11
because everyone was asleep and beer
00:33:13
yeah so it wasn't yeah it was like ah
00:33:16
okay sweet
00:33:17
um
00:33:17
and then uh yeah February we're in
00:33:20
uh with Richie having lunch Mirabelle
00:33:23
Mall sushi
00:33:24
and he's on crutches and um
00:33:28
like we just like stood up and I'm
00:33:30
holding on to this the table and he's
00:33:32
getting knocked he can't stand up and
00:33:35
he's just getting knocked off his seat
00:33:37
this place is rocking and you just go
00:33:39
man this isn't good a and it's like
00:33:41
you're looking around and
00:33:44
um looking into the supermarket and
00:33:46
things just falling everywhere and
00:33:47
you're going man this isn't this isn't
00:33:49
right
00:33:50
um and so
00:33:52
and I had an eight week old at home and
00:33:54
it's like okay
00:33:55
man said to him I drove him I was like
00:33:58
man this girl drop you off
00:34:01
um
00:34:02
so we drove dropped him off and then
00:34:05
um on my way home at you know a five
00:34:07
minute Journey took about half an hour
00:34:08
just because suddenly there's flooding
00:34:10
and it's like yeah Perfection everywhere
00:34:13
and like
00:34:14
like concrete fences are just like
00:34:16
rocked over
00:34:17
um
00:34:18
and just yeah it's just it's an unreal
00:34:21
sight and it's kind of you know get home
00:34:23
and
00:34:24
um
00:34:26
and my wife standing on the driveway
00:34:27
with baby kind of you know get me out of
00:34:31
here type of thing and it's like wow and
00:34:33
then suddenly there must be another
00:34:36
um
00:34:37
I have to shaft to shock and then so and
00:34:39
then our place just was around we're
00:34:41
quite close to a little creek and we're
00:34:43
in Shirley which got heavily hammered by
00:34:46
the liquefaction so
00:34:48
but it didn't come off straight away
00:34:49
from our place so it kind of started
00:34:51
coming up then when I got home and then
00:34:53
suddenly
00:34:54
it's basically up you know nearly
00:34:57
getting into a house onto the side of
00:34:58
our house covering our deck
00:35:01
um and a whole you know big old Mounds
00:35:04
in our driveway it's uh it's a crazy
00:35:06
thing it shows you how much power they
00:35:08
have so just a crazy time
00:35:10
um that probably didn't that's not when
00:35:12
I I was just you know here in the moment
00:35:14
there and you're doing things we're
00:35:15
going to stay with my aunt and uncle on
00:35:17
the other side of town and
00:35:18
um
00:35:19
and it was difficult I guess and tried
00:35:21
to get my wife
00:35:23
up to family and Auckland um
00:35:26
and then it wasn't until
00:35:28
so basically from then on we got stuck
00:35:31
in and got a few mates around we cleared
00:35:34
this liquefaction and suddenly like
00:35:36
there's just piles of these little
00:35:37
confessions around the road everywhere
00:35:39
right amazing man so like we
00:35:42
do our street and it's just
00:35:44
you know how big of a job it is is
00:35:47
ridiculous so like we did my house and
00:35:49
then we went round at the different
00:35:51
other houses and stuff and it's just
00:35:54
shoveling crap into wheelbarrows and
00:35:56
taking them out onto the side of the
00:35:58
road and and so I did that and then I
00:36:00
think
00:36:02
um
00:36:03
happen another big Aftershock happened
00:36:05
and
00:36:07
a little bit of perfection came back up
00:36:09
sorry
00:36:09
I cleared it
00:36:11
you know whatever and then I think it
00:36:12
was June and
00:36:15
um and another uh shock happened and
00:36:18
after shocks were happening all the time
00:36:19
so it was quite it was quite freaky and
00:36:20
it's quite it's not a great time yeah
00:36:22
friends of mine Christchurch they became
00:36:24
good at predicting oh that's a four
00:36:26
point yeah you would you would which was
00:36:27
you know terrible way to look it is yeah
00:36:29
and so this one happened and the local
00:36:33
fiction came back up and it was
00:36:35
it was quite decent and it just kind of
00:36:37
really that was the sign of it I think
00:36:40
that really broke me that it was hey
00:36:42
this might not this is going to keep
00:36:44
going and I was like it was like I don't
00:36:46
want to shovel crap for the rest of the
00:36:49
rest you know like here and at the
00:36:51
moment we're still playing rugby and I'm
00:36:52
you know I'm leaving every weekend
00:36:54
because we're not playing at home and
00:36:55
leaving my fan like my wife and kid
00:36:58
and you're going
00:36:59
it's like oh am I you know what are we
00:37:02
doing and it just kind of
00:37:04
it was like a a day off and what I just
00:37:08
kind of was like bit broken you know I
00:37:09
was like yeah I can't do this just beat
00:37:11
him down yeah beat him down and you just
00:37:13
felt that way because you're just
00:37:14
constantly worried about things
00:37:16
um you know when you're away you're
00:37:18
worried because your wife's at home and
00:37:20
you know what what if you know um but
00:37:23
what was amazing was just the spirit of
00:37:25
the community and and how awesome it was
00:37:27
and you just the sense of
00:37:31
knowing that you've you've shared this
00:37:33
experience you know like and there's
00:37:35
and you understood what everyone was
00:37:37
going through yeah and everyone had the
00:37:39
same kind of
00:37:40
feelings and so what was awesome so DC
00:37:43
so Dan Carter said he left over kind of
00:37:46
that side of town as well he's like mate
00:37:49
um I've got says Club Southbridge he's
00:37:52
got so he he had some
00:37:54
few players and things from Southbridge
00:37:56
Rugby Club so this is on a day I think
00:37:58
it's kind of around like a
00:38:00
you know I caught a finalist time or
00:38:02
something you know like um
00:38:04
a day off you should be resting up and
00:38:07
um you know preparing for a rugby game
00:38:09
but it just was a strange strange year
00:38:11
and he
00:38:13
was awesome man like so he got his his
00:38:15
Club in so they come in a minivan from
00:38:17
out in Southbridge and helped me clean
00:38:19
up my my yard and um
00:38:21
you know you do it in six hours instead
00:38:23
of me trying to shovel away for days
00:38:25
yeah so yeah
00:38:27
um and get it done but I think oh that's
00:38:30
awesome yeah that whole understanding of
00:38:33
what it what you went through and it's
00:38:35
it's weird
00:38:36
um just talking about now he kind of
00:38:38
brings back those memories because
00:38:39
generally you kind of you forget hey you
00:38:41
know some
00:38:42
um but yeah it was uh well thanks for
00:38:43
sharing that is your um you're a tough
00:38:45
biker I I think for me like I'm just
00:38:47
pulling into the driveway immediately
00:38:49
afterwards and seeing my wife and child
00:38:51
there I think that would yeah that would
00:38:52
be enough to break me I reckon just know
00:38:54
that everyone's okay yeah oh man um
00:38:56
that's the thing it was
00:38:58
yeah I didn't I didn't you didn't quite
00:39:00
you just would you didn't know yeah
00:39:02
you're like Christchurch doesn't get
00:39:04
Earthworks but you know it's Wellington
00:39:06
you know what's going on so I don't know
00:39:08
it's just you just head to a debt day
00:39:10
and
00:39:11
um but certainly crazy and it wasn't you
00:39:14
know honestly it drives a lot of people
00:39:17
to you know some pretty bad places yeah
00:39:21
of course of course I've been able to
00:39:23
share it with everyone together was was
00:39:24
pretty cool um for us as a team and
00:39:27
Crusaders and then you know across the
00:39:28
community as well yeah and you shared
00:39:30
the story about um Dan and his um
00:39:31
Southbridge mates there's also like the
00:39:32
student volunteer army that were out
00:39:34
doing doing their Community oh yeah it
00:39:37
really brought out the best in people oh
00:39:38
100 and so that's what we kind of tried
00:39:40
to do too you know as Crusaders you know
00:39:42
it was like okay what can we do yeah we
00:39:44
were like then we can't play a game this
00:39:46
weekend let's try and go out there and
00:39:48
help out as many people as we can and
00:39:49
got to the point where the best way for
00:39:52
us to help was through you know our
00:39:54
performance until we put a smile on
00:39:56
people's faces and it's like okay yeah
00:39:58
it's a believable season then yeah it
00:40:00
was Escape for us and for everyone else
00:40:02
to watch and
00:40:03
um you know aside from
00:40:05
you know like
00:40:07
fire out like a couple of points you
00:40:09
know I would have been probably one of
00:40:10
the greatest
00:40:11
championships what happened you have to
00:40:13
remind me what happened oh we you know
00:40:15
played every game away from home you
00:40:17
know that that year so
00:40:18
um
00:40:19
you know Nelson for our home games we
00:40:21
played in Napier for our home games
00:40:23
so every weekend you're shipping up and
00:40:25
going away we played in in London
00:40:28
um
00:40:29
it was unbelievable and then so
00:40:33
um caught a fight so then we went
00:40:35
quarterfinal in Cape Town
00:40:37
no quarterfinal and Nelson semi-final in
00:40:40
Cape Town Final in Brisbane
00:40:43
um and and
00:40:44
we just ran out of puff unfortunately
00:40:46
and maybe the whole okay surprise the
00:40:49
whole occasion of what it was
00:40:52
and and things so
00:40:54
we lost the final
00:40:57
um by a few points we'll be in here just
00:40:59
unbelievable it's called this try from
00:41:01
nowhere um to win the game basically but
00:41:04
the what was amazing was that the fact
00:41:07
that when it came home the next day on
00:41:08
the on the plane and the airport was
00:41:10
just chuckled people that deal was like
00:41:13
one of the moments that you go man
00:41:14
that's why you're playing why you love
00:41:16
this this place here so yeah oh good
00:41:19
yeah the other occasion where you talk
00:41:21
about um you know getting a motion on
00:41:23
your book is um head injury and these um
00:41:25
you get into this um in quite a deep way
00:41:27
in your book and it's actually quite a
00:41:29
difficult portion of the book to read
00:41:31
like I gave me migraines just reading it
00:41:33
like it really Scotty Jane yourself
00:41:36
really sort of captured the the essence
00:41:38
of I suppose what a concussion or head
00:41:39
injury is like I don't envy what you've
00:41:41
been through that sounds awful yeah
00:41:44
that's uh
00:41:47
it's not nice to go through anything
00:41:49
like that I think um
00:41:51
you know a really you question a lot of
00:41:53
things I guess when you're going through
00:41:55
um what um what you go through around a
00:41:57
concussion injury and there's
00:41:58
you know it can happen to a lot of
00:42:00
people can't
00:42:01
um in different walks of life but I
00:42:03
guess the nature of the job I've had
00:42:06
concussions before and you kind of have
00:42:07
your time off and you come back and
00:42:09
you're sweet but
00:42:10
uh this time 2014
00:42:13
um you know these kind of headaches
00:42:16
things didn't go away you know and
00:42:17
you're like
00:42:18
um
00:42:19
okay I'll have time we have some time
00:42:21
off doc mcdoc was awesome Deb Robinson
00:42:24
she's amazing
00:42:25
um you know we just
00:42:27
um would talk a lot about what's
00:42:29
happening and
00:42:30
um and even then like I had a month or
00:42:33
so off the game
00:42:35
you kind of and I'm like I'm feeling
00:42:37
okay but
00:42:38
you know there's obviously something not
00:42:40
quite right and so
00:42:42
I came back for a game
00:42:44
um
00:42:45
and nothing happened in the game felt
00:42:48
really good this was the last game
00:42:49
before we're going to go play for the
00:42:50
All Blacks
00:42:52
um had a great great game
00:42:54
um
00:42:55
then the next day I drove
00:42:57
um
00:42:58
kids we went out um to Oxford I think
00:43:00
had some lunch and stuff and
00:43:02
um
00:43:03
and then uh I started getting like a
00:43:06
headache and it's like it's the next day
00:43:07
at lunch time and stuff and I'm like oh
00:43:09
man that's no good and you kind of sick
00:43:11
and guess what's going on then next day
00:43:13
going to Camp with the All Blacks and it
00:43:15
was like a real kind of tough decision
00:43:17
where I was like oh I had to tell I was
00:43:19
like
00:43:20
I don't think I can do this you know
00:43:22
it's like
00:43:23
so I kind of had to put my hand up and
00:43:25
say no I can't can't play and playing
00:43:27
for their Works obviously
00:43:29
what you want to do so
00:43:31
um
00:43:32
and without actually having a specific
00:43:34
moment that you know and I was like
00:43:38
so I said no can't do it
00:43:41
um
00:43:42
and you know so had two games off
00:43:46
came back for the third test against
00:43:47
England
00:43:48
um and Hamilton and
00:43:51
I I just talking to the doctors and they
00:43:54
were like look this can't this isn't
00:43:56
concussion this must be something you
00:43:58
know anxiety and different things and
00:44:00
whatever but I thought it was like a
00:44:01
well psychological thing not necessarily
00:44:04
psychological but just things that maybe
00:44:06
weren't quite something wasn't quite
00:44:07
right
00:44:08
um
00:44:09
and so I came back and I was feeling
00:44:14
better so I wasn't you know if I put my
00:44:17
hand up if I wasn't feeling great right
00:44:18
in that so I had done that
00:44:20
um and so I came back for the third test
00:44:24
um
00:44:24
and then sometime in the first half like
00:44:26
I
00:44:27
I copped a knock
00:44:30
and I just I knew because of all the it
00:44:33
wasn't even a bad knock and and I knew
00:44:35
what had happened and I was like
00:44:37
but I didn't want to come off more
00:44:39
purely because of what people would
00:44:42
write about you know if I came here
00:44:44
well like you know people would know
00:44:47
I've had this these problems right I
00:44:49
just didn't want to make it bigger than
00:44:50
what it was so right so if I came off
00:44:53
before half time then
00:44:56
the headlines would be care and read you
00:44:57
know about a concussion things like that
00:44:59
and more I just didn't I wanted to
00:45:01
protect my family and my wife and stuff
00:45:04
so well you were worried about
00:45:07
them being worked there yeah yeah so I
00:45:09
kind of got my way to half time and you
00:45:11
kind of can run around on a rugby field
00:45:13
and to be honest
00:45:15
that was our best half for a while and
00:45:17
I've played yeah I could still play it
00:45:19
do it
00:45:21
um
00:45:21
and so but half time I said I came off
00:45:24
and I said to Darkness like that it's me
00:45:27
so I stayed in the shed I cried a lot so
00:45:30
there's another another time so it was
00:45:31
kind of like
00:45:32
um
00:45:33
and I was like I question
00:45:35
my whole existence in the game at that
00:45:38
point
00:45:39
um and then that night yeah
00:45:41
um
00:45:41
lost it
00:45:43
um
00:45:44
what is my wife and and kind of just in
00:45:47
bed and stuff yeah so
00:45:49
um what did you think it might be that
00:45:51
might be the interview yeah you were
00:45:52
there worried about it yeah so
00:45:54
um so it was just kind of and it's
00:45:58
a lot of what hid Knox can you know the
00:46:01
funny things they so
00:46:03
um yeah so it was like oh man this is it
00:46:07
you know what I am doing that's kind of
00:46:10
the end and then
00:46:12
um you know you go well
00:46:16
got back to
00:46:19
um Crusaders and they're like okay we're
00:46:21
gonna do
00:46:22
do these tests on me um
00:46:25
just which was awesome so I went to
00:46:26
concussion specialist tested all that
00:46:28
and flip out of all of it my brain is
00:46:32
100 fine and
00:46:35
um there's you know there's no symptoms
00:46:37
of concussion really or anything or
00:46:39
things like that
00:46:41
um and everything's going good there but
00:46:44
I am
00:46:45
completely out of whack with my balance
00:46:47
so my vestibular are you still to this
00:46:49
day right
00:46:52
um so my vestibular was the system which
00:46:54
is basically you know people who come
00:46:57
out of car crashes and stuff have that
00:46:59
um
00:47:00
where I couldn't um yeah if anything
00:47:02
that we had to move in my eye would eyes
00:47:05
would just take longer to catch up and
00:47:07
you'd get a headache from it so like I'd
00:47:09
be driving I'd drive for five minutes to
00:47:12
to training and just turn your head to
00:47:14
look for traffic and then you get
00:47:15
trained you have a headache and you'd be
00:47:17
like oh what the hell you know but it
00:47:19
wasn't so you'd attribute it to
00:47:22
concussion but it obviously falls from
00:47:24
the whack that my balance was wasn't
00:47:26
good so
00:47:28
I ended up
00:47:29
seeing well two things seeing
00:47:31
psychologist and seeing a balanced
00:47:32
therapist too
00:47:34
gave me all these
00:47:36
uh exercises to do which actually made
00:47:38
you feel worse you talk about this in
00:47:41
the book and um what like what what
00:47:43
drives you to keep doing those exercises
00:47:45
because yeah yeah because yeah you
00:47:47
actually feel you feel worse doing them
00:47:49
because you put in it's like building
00:47:51
muscle in it in the gym like you know
00:47:53
you stress yourself and so the same
00:47:55
thing
00:47:56
um and it was it was hard
00:47:59
and
00:48:00
I must have been real [ __ ] to hang
00:48:02
around with and I didn't really tell
00:48:04
anyone
00:48:06
in my team about it yeah
00:48:08
um
00:48:09
so it was quite like I'm I was kept I
00:48:12
was kept kept in the Crusaders and I was
00:48:14
back playing you know I was feeling like
00:48:16
crap the entire week and then I'd stop
00:48:19
doing these exercises on like a Thursday
00:48:20
and then have two days off before the
00:48:22
game and you kind of
00:48:24
get through the game somehow
00:48:27
um you know start the exercise and feel
00:48:29
crap again but
00:48:30
um but it was but kind of knowing it
00:48:33
wasn't my head and knowing it was you
00:48:35
know so I was like well
00:48:36
I
00:48:37
listening to The Experts here I was
00:48:39
getting some help from a psychologist
00:48:41
around their anxiousness and all that
00:48:42
stuff
00:48:43
um what do you mean the anxiousness
00:48:46
where you just like nervous of going
00:48:47
into context of different things and
00:48:49
what could happen and all this stuff and
00:48:52
and just around that just headaches you
00:48:54
know if you're getting headaches all the
00:48:55
time it's just you know
00:48:57
uh you know it's not great on your
00:48:59
mental well-being
00:49:02
um so more of that side of things say
00:49:03
and kind of clearing your mind a little
00:49:05
bit on that respect so ended up doing a
00:49:08
lot of
00:49:10
um kind of breathing and and kind of
00:49:13
meditation type stuff around it
00:49:16
um aligned with all this other stuff so
00:49:18
around my balance so it was it was a
00:49:21
crazy time like I'm
00:49:23
pretty lucky I'd
00:49:24
I'm out I got out of it and stuff like
00:49:27
um you know with my brain yeah in a good
00:49:30
space it's kind of scary so when you see
00:49:32
a few things pop up in media about
00:49:34
you know I lingering things
00:49:36
um I like like Carl Heyman yeah yeah so
00:49:40
but hey I believe I did what I had to in
00:49:44
the game at the time and you know I've
00:49:46
made sure I did rest when
00:49:48
the actual brain was on on the you know
00:49:50
and then you know stress so you know you
00:49:54
know we just gotta wait and see there
00:49:55
but you know you live your life eh um so
00:49:58
yeah it came it came out of that so I'm
00:50:01
pretty lucky yeah geez you're so
00:50:03
considerate aren't you it's funny that
00:50:05
um you wouldn't want to be um taken off
00:50:06
in the first half because you're worried
00:50:07
about about your wife at home I I um I
00:50:11
caught up with um Harriet Kane for my
00:50:13
podcast a couple of months ago and
00:50:15
um she said a similar sort of thing like
00:50:16
I suppose from the um the wife's
00:50:18
perspective like watching Sam being
00:50:20
stretched off with a back injury on the
00:50:22
other side of the world like it's it's
00:50:24
um it's not a sport for the faint hair
00:50:25
today when it comes to Partners no I
00:50:27
think yeah it's actually you know a lot
00:50:29
worse for them you know like because
00:50:30
they don't know they just seen you go
00:50:32
off and
00:50:33
you know what is the actual what is
00:50:35
wrong and it's always hard and I think
00:50:38
um
00:50:39
you know and they cop the worst too in
00:50:41
terms of like you know the media as well
00:50:43
you know the ones closest to you like as
00:50:45
a player I don't read what the media is
00:50:47
going to write about me but it's not
00:50:49
good for the soul man so but everyone
00:50:51
you know your parents are and your
00:50:53
friends and yeah and it's like well hey
00:50:57
you know
00:50:58
but you know you understand it but they
00:51:00
they ride the wave a bit more than you
00:51:01
do because you're in you know a bit more
00:51:03
insulin yeah
00:51:05
um you know know what's happening anyway
00:51:06
so
00:51:07
um but yeah it is it's hard on on them
00:51:10
and you appreciate exactly what they go
00:51:11
through yeah let's let's talk about your
00:51:13
wife so you're talking about something
00:51:15
light for a second so um your high
00:51:17
school sweethearts yeah we are yeah yeah
00:51:18
yeah so you meet when I met at Russell
00:51:21
College 2002 so it's uh say how old at
00:51:24
the time uh 16-17 right yeah so um yeah
00:51:28
20 years I've been
00:51:30
um together now so it's um who who saw
00:51:33
it
00:51:34
was it a slow burn um uh my wife was I
00:51:39
think I was um in her sights that's what
00:51:42
I'll say
00:51:43
she was uh seventh four miles sixth form
00:51:46
and right okay it's your bunk off for
00:51:49
her um arts history of arts class
00:51:52
whatever what's me do PE I think
00:51:54
to sit in the common room and watch me
00:51:57
do pee so um what were you doing in PE I
00:52:00
don't know
00:52:01
um you know maybe my short shorts or
00:52:04
something I don't know what it was in my
00:52:05
long hair um were you a big deal at
00:52:08
school like were you were the man are
00:52:09
you were very good at we haven't even
00:52:10
got into your Cricket yet you're very
00:52:12
good at Cricket and no I'm guessing
00:52:13
you're very good at rugby yeah but I
00:52:15
think at that at Roseville College you
00:52:17
know been a big Sports style wasn't much
00:52:19
of a thing you know it didn't actually
00:52:21
it didn't give him that status I guess
00:52:23
in some ways you know there's certain
00:52:24
aspects of it but
00:52:26
um no it was generally
00:52:28
yeah the older you wear the more status
00:52:30
you have in the school so us um
00:52:33
you know still sixth form uniform
00:52:36
um and it came down to like basically we
00:52:38
met well
00:52:40
um at a party at a bonfire party it was
00:52:43
um
00:52:44
[Music]
00:52:45
and then yeah it's kind of just it went
00:52:47
from there so you know I was probably
00:52:51
from you know from as a younger guys
00:52:53
hanging out with the older guys anyway
00:52:55
because you're playing with them so
00:52:56
going to a few of those different
00:52:58
parties and
00:52:59
what have you so um it was uh yeah a lot
00:53:03
of fun and I guess it kind of
00:53:05
our relationship just grew and I think
00:53:07
that was pretty awesome that for what
00:53:09
ended up in my career yeah have yeah
00:53:12
been with someone you know for so long
00:53:14
and yeah yeah exactly so
00:53:17
um makes you pretty easily it puts me in
00:53:19
my place so yeah when did you when did
00:53:21
you realize it was love
00:53:23
um
00:53:24
I I don't know I think it was reasonably
00:53:26
early I think probably but maybe that's
00:53:28
just teenage love but you know when we
00:53:30
we moved down to Cannery to give a
00:53:33
couple years later
00:53:34
um
00:53:35
and you know so we probably thought
00:53:38
someone was you know genuinely serious
00:53:42
um and a lot of stuff goes on so you
00:53:44
know if things happen quite quickly you
00:53:45
know um that's at stage of life and
00:53:48
um and knowing that you want to just to
00:53:50
spend more time with her and we went in
00:53:51
flooded down here and yeah and then it
00:53:54
was all it was all roses and you kind of
00:53:56
go yep so you want to spend the rest of
00:53:57
your life with oh that's such a cool
00:53:59
story yeah that's really special so how
00:54:01
long was it before you proposed
00:54:03
um
00:54:04
I got married when I was 20.
00:54:20
it was um
00:54:23
yeah it was just one of those things
00:54:24
they had to had to make some money to
00:54:25
buy a ring I think and and you got three
00:54:28
kids now yeah three kids yeah what two
00:54:31
girls and a boy two girls and a boy so
00:54:33
Al Eden and Reuben um it was so awesome
00:54:36
they're 11 nine and five and they're at
00:54:38
Great ages and
00:54:39
um yeah awesome kids
00:54:42
um all different
00:54:44
um but just amazing yeah and cool to see
00:54:46
and they're all involved in sport and
00:54:48
different things
00:54:50
um yeah it's uh it's amazing eh yeah so
00:54:52
really cool yeah so yeah so your two
00:54:54
daughters they're sort of old enough I
00:54:55
guess to have an appreciation of um what
00:54:57
you did for a job yeah they are they are
00:55:00
and so it's
00:55:02
yeah they they
00:55:04
didn't really appreciate the time um in
00:55:07
fact I think my nine-year-old now so my
00:55:10
last few years I've kept in the all
00:55:11
black students come home so Dad Dad can
00:55:14
you stop being all black Captain
00:55:17
because uh you know you know it's just
00:55:21
the way it is you know you walk around
00:55:22
go out for an outing and people want to
00:55:25
talk to you and take photos and all this
00:55:27
stuff and and that's why I think she
00:55:30
kind of got on the head she's like why
00:55:31
can't you just be dead why can't we just
00:55:33
go to you know the playground and and
00:55:35
you push me on the swings
00:55:38
you're talking like they're um yeah I
00:55:40
don't know you think you think they
00:55:42
would have that that respect that I'd
00:55:43
see you out with your family and they'd
00:55:44
leave you alone
00:55:47
nah but you have to understand that that
00:55:49
was the hardest thing was when you're
00:55:51
out with family and and people would
00:55:52
come up to you yeah that was when you
00:55:55
had to
00:55:56
um you know be very Placid and bite your
00:55:59
tongue a little bit you can't just go
00:56:01
through with it because like for them
00:56:02
it's like they I mean you've got your
00:56:04
kids with them but they they never know
00:56:06
when they're going to see you again no
00:56:07
no so you understand it but it was
00:56:09
always kind of hard you know like when
00:56:11
you but our my oldest year is pretty
00:56:13
good she had just grabbed the younger
00:56:14
too and kind of just walked them over
00:56:16
there and I was like and a lot of people
00:56:18
would a lot of people would say oh no
00:56:20
it's all right they can they can be in
00:56:22
the photo too and I was like no I don't
00:56:24
want my kids in a random person's yeah I
00:56:27
was kind of um but you know that whole
00:56:31
part of it is is pretty amazing like
00:56:34
it's it's foreign because you don't
00:56:36
really expect you know when you're
00:56:37
growing up that you're gonna people stop
00:56:39
you and talk to you and take photos but
00:56:41
um a little bit frustrating when you're
00:56:43
with the family and stuff and so you
00:56:45
just byproduct of that was you just I
00:56:47
just had to be careful well not careful
00:56:49
but we just didn't go to certain places
00:56:52
you know go to them didn't go to the
00:56:54
mall during the school holidays you
00:56:56
don't go to the Margaret mayhe
00:56:57
playground because it's too busy and
00:56:59
stuff so it's like so you'd um you know
00:57:02
would only go to our local playground
00:57:03
and they'd go oh I did this is a small
00:57:06
slide
00:57:07
no we're lucky with anyone's here though
00:57:09
so
00:57:10
you know I was like oh yeah it's all
00:57:13
part of it but
00:57:14
um I think now yeah the older two kind
00:57:16
of realize how potentially it was yeah
00:57:20
it's quite a big thing but yeah yeah a
00:57:22
young man who's doesn't there but
00:57:24
awesome they're at my last game for the
00:57:26
all works so
00:57:27
um yeah especially on the field and
00:57:28
we've got some pretty cool um moments
00:57:30
some cheers videos and stuff like that
00:57:32
so that's cool did you want to talk
00:57:35
about your 34th birthday
00:57:38
happy fourth birthday
00:57:42
ever
00:57:44
uh yeah you know like
00:57:46
um
00:57:47
yeah semi-final not 2019. so oh man yeah
00:57:51
so this was um yeah the Rugby World Cup
00:57:53
semi-final England England beat the All
00:57:55
Blacks in 19 197. I feel like um I don't
00:57:58
know I don't want to put words in your
00:57:59
mouth but because you've won two World
00:58:01
Cups I suppose losing one
00:58:03
is easier to take no no it's not really
00:58:06
no I think because what I talked about
00:58:08
too around the captaincy you know like
00:58:10
this
00:58:11
you know you wanted to do it for the
00:58:14
team but then also you've got all this
00:58:15
responsibility as yourself and I want to
00:58:17
you know prove that I was I was um
00:58:19
capable of doing it as a leader um and
00:58:22
then so you put in so much effort and
00:58:24
work
00:58:26
um and then it doesn't come off and you
00:58:28
know my birthday was irrelevant like at
00:58:30
that point you know a 34th birthday is
00:58:33
irrelevant anyway you're not gonna have
00:58:35
a party or anything for that or you know
00:58:37
you don't get presents anymore so or
00:58:39
winning a World Cup Series
00:58:42
yeah it would have been nice um
00:58:45
you know but what put it in perspective
00:58:47
I guess and that was a that was probably
00:58:48
the hardest
00:58:50
um time on a rugby field for me and post
00:58:52
that game
00:58:54
um having to show leadership
00:58:57
um having to bring the team in show the
00:59:00
leadership like after the loss yeah
00:59:02
after the loss you know like putting on
00:59:04
a brave face yeah like just and not just
00:59:06
a brave face though like showing that
00:59:08
it's genuinely hurting yeah for the team
00:59:10
but also saying to my boys you know who
00:59:13
that hey we're in all that team that you
00:59:16
know if we
00:59:18
um win gracefully we have to be able to
00:59:20
lose gracefully here so let's put our
00:59:21
heads up and let's pay respect to
00:59:23
England and
00:59:25
um and show everyone that you know we'll
00:59:27
pay respect to the crowd and all that
00:59:28
and
00:59:29
and then I you know to those boys there
00:59:32
it's like hey boys how you know you guys
00:59:35
will get another chance here so just
00:59:37
remember this as well
00:59:39
um this feeling
00:59:40
um and so
00:59:42
and
00:59:43
not
00:59:45
downgrading what it was because man
00:59:46
there's a lot of tears and stuff in the
00:59:49
[ __ ] after the game but just being able
00:59:51
to keep it together and and do that was
00:59:53
was what was required you know um and
00:59:56
then because it was my birthday
00:59:59
um
01:00:00
get back to the um
01:00:02
back to the room and
01:00:04
um you know my wife dropped off into the
01:00:06
hotel you know like cards from the kids
01:00:08
and stuff so
01:00:10
um
01:00:11
it was you know in some way it's so hard
01:00:13
to
01:00:15
um
01:00:16
uh you know keep you know it's
01:00:19
perspective of things and it was a real
01:00:21
tough couple of days
01:00:23
um nine
01:00:25
you know what had happened around the
01:00:27
rugby
01:00:27
um
01:00:29
but then it was it was looking back now
01:00:31
I think it was a pretty pivotal moment
01:00:33
potentially in uh in New Zealand psyche
01:00:35
around loss and around how to
01:00:39
um
01:00:40
you know look after people and how to be
01:00:43
vulnerable and how to yeah you know the
01:00:45
public around you know knowing that hey
01:00:48
they've put in this effort and and what
01:00:51
have you and then you know what will be
01:00:52
will be in in terms of results and you
01:00:54
can't always get the positive one can
01:00:56
you say yeah I feel like New Zealand
01:00:58
showed a bit of maturity and I wonder if
01:00:59
that's because um we we had one 2011 and
01:01:02
2015. I remember I can't remember which
01:01:04
one it was but in the maybe the 90s or
01:01:06
the early 2000s like John Hart got back
01:01:08
from a World Cup and was spat on at the
01:01:09
races yeah it's disgraceful yeah
01:01:12
horrible isn't it yeah and that's what
01:01:13
it was and potentially it was you know
01:01:15
that would won two in a row
01:01:16
um
01:01:17
before that so but then
01:01:21
I I hope New Zealand has learned you
01:01:24
know and it's like you're not going to
01:01:25
win every every game yes we want it we
01:01:28
got there to win and you give yourself a
01:01:30
chance to win and um
01:01:32
but there's a point where it is a it's a
01:01:35
game and it's awesome and and as an all
01:01:37
black
01:01:38
man you'd rather the expectation was
01:01:41
that we went man I'd hate to be in a
01:01:43
team where the the fans you know
01:01:45
like the Warriors yeah yeah well you
01:01:48
know it's just like it'd be so it'd be
01:01:50
demoralizing I guess in some ways so
01:01:52
um yeah that's that's what makes it who
01:01:55
we are you know
01:01:57
but there's you know it's a great thing
01:02:00
about sport so
01:02:02
um but yeah it was a
01:02:03
it was a tough week
01:02:06
um but being able to then back up and in
01:02:08
some ways be able to play a final game
01:02:09
for the All Blacks after that after it
01:02:11
loss and
01:02:13
um so was that your final final game the
01:02:15
um the the fourth year with um Wales
01:02:17
yeah Wales yeah yeah so yeah finished
01:02:19
there and actually genuinely be able to
01:02:21
enjoy that game yeah
01:02:23
um no I know it was my last and just go
01:02:25
out there and have fun and remember
01:02:27
things that happened
01:02:29
um you know with a few guys as well who
01:02:31
were retiring so yeah it was good
01:02:34
um yeah you talk about that that um that
01:02:36
semi-final game in the book and then uh
01:02:38
the the next week you have to like watch
01:02:40
watch a video analysis of the game is
01:02:43
that is that necessary that seems like
01:02:45
that seems particularly cruel yeah
01:02:47
pretty cruel Steve Hansen
01:02:51
um
01:02:52
yeah
01:03:02
um
01:03:04
yeah look we had a couple of days to to
01:03:06
reflect and you know it wasn't a normal
01:03:08
week for us that week
01:03:10
um because of you know what to process
01:03:13
all the things we had to but I think
01:03:14
what
01:03:15
Steve and myself was it wasn't about us
01:03:18
who were leaving it was about
01:03:22
the 20 odd guys or more who were going
01:03:26
to still be there right you know yeah
01:03:28
okay so it's like okay we have to create
01:03:29
we have to create an opportunity for
01:03:31
some learning out of this for these guys
01:03:33
and so
01:03:34
um
01:03:35
you know for them to take with them as
01:03:38
they move forward
01:03:39
you know and to whoever was going to be
01:03:41
the next coach of Fozzy and stuff so
01:03:44
um I suppose I mean you do learn more
01:03:45
from your from your from your [ __ ] ups
01:03:48
than yeah what you do is don't you yeah
01:03:50
you don't want to have to wait for you
01:03:52
know a loss but
01:03:54
um that's uh that's how that's a
01:03:56
business you know it's how you learn but
01:03:58
um you know and the other thing was that
01:04:01
man it's in all that Jersey that you're
01:04:03
putting on so by the time you got to the
01:04:05
end of the week it was okay you know
01:04:07
we're at Opportunity privileged to be
01:04:09
able to do this and
01:04:11
um you know let's go enjoy our enjoy
01:04:13
putting on the Jersey again one more
01:04:14
time so yeah what was that like for you
01:04:16
because I remember in um was it 20 maybe
01:04:19
2015 when um Richie played his last game
01:04:21
apparently he got back on the bus back
01:04:23
to the hotel still with his like playing
01:04:25
cat on and left it on for as long as
01:04:28
what he possibly could what was it what
01:04:29
was it like for you that final game are
01:04:31
you are you sort of in the in the
01:04:33
headspace where
01:04:34
where you're thinking okay this is the
01:04:36
last time I'm going to do this this is
01:04:37
the last time I'm going to do that
01:04:39
um a little bit Yeah Yeah potentially
01:04:42
like there's a little bit of that um as
01:04:44
you're going to the ground and stuff and
01:04:45
things like that and even in the hakka
01:04:47
and um yeah
01:04:51
um
01:04:52
and honestly it probably hit me a when I
01:04:54
started leading the Haka so I was um got
01:04:56
a bit of help from TJ and that um but
01:05:00
um
01:05:00
it was yeah I think you know like
01:05:03
once you're on the field you're just
01:05:05
playing the game you know and that's
01:05:06
what it was and then honestly it was
01:05:09
it was it was it was a cool moment
01:05:12
um to be able to finish up and you know
01:05:14
obviously to win that game you know was
01:05:16
kind of irrelevant but awesome to get a
01:05:18
a third
01:05:20
um and then
01:05:22
you know the whole reason I well not the
01:05:25
whole reason I play but one of the
01:05:27
things that I've really enjoyed about
01:05:28
playing or the most enjoyable thing was
01:05:30
the mates you you made you know so
01:05:32
that's what I tried to enjoy over that
01:05:34
week and then after for a couple days
01:05:37
um you know reflecting on on things eh
01:05:41
um but yeah it was hard it was hard it
01:05:42
was pretty emotional time for a lot of
01:05:44
guys there who are moving on yeah and
01:05:46
you've got friends for life who are you
01:05:48
still in touch with who would you
01:05:49
consider like best friends or good
01:05:51
friends yeah um
01:05:55
yeah you do you do
01:05:57
um look I've got some really good mates
01:05:58
from here who are probably the guys who
01:06:00
of my era um so Andy Alice uh White
01:06:03
Crockett uh two really really good mates
01:06:07
um and then Sam white luck as well
01:06:10
um who you know you play a lot of these
01:06:12
guys are and not they are connected to
01:06:14
through my wife through wives and stuff
01:06:15
as well so and and kids so
01:06:18
um those guys are really tight like I'm
01:06:20
actually really tight with Aaron Smith
01:06:21
as well um
01:06:23
he's one who you know completely
01:06:26
different in some aspects
01:06:29
um but on the field we're connected in a
01:06:31
lot of ways and and I really enjoyed his
01:06:34
friendship and
01:06:35
um and helping him out as much as I
01:06:36
could and um you know everyone's
01:06:39
got different aspects of what you do but
01:06:42
yeah I think it's the guys here who you
01:06:43
spend a lot of time with like Luke
01:06:45
Romano
01:06:46
um
01:06:47
and you know you've grown up with I
01:06:49
think yeah yeah the ones that yeah
01:06:51
yeah you really uh enjoy keep in touch
01:06:53
with yeah now you mentioned um Andy
01:06:56
Ellis before and that um triggers a
01:06:58
memory from um another story in your
01:06:59
book
01:07:01
um you and him having um having a
01:07:03
wrestle a wrestle at a wedding yeah yeah
01:07:06
you want to elaborate on that so you're
01:07:08
on the whiskeys yeah this is in your
01:07:11
book but you've got no actual
01:07:12
recollection of this happening
01:07:15
well there's you know it's probably just
01:07:18
from memories from people telling you
01:07:19
right but yeah it was just so who's
01:07:21
winning was it
01:07:24
um and he instead of toasting with he
01:07:28
toasted with uh whiskey that night so
01:07:30
there's a few whiskeys happening um I'm
01:07:32
not big whiskey drinkers really
01:07:34
um and so one thing led to another and
01:07:36
then when we're leaving
01:07:41
so we're trying to get out to a taxi or
01:07:43
something and then I'm not sure what
01:07:45
started it but me and Andy ended up
01:07:46
wrestling on the on the floor on the
01:07:48
grass and
01:07:49
um it carries on for a very long time
01:07:51
and uh so you're quite a bit bigger than
01:07:53
him yeah a little bit bigger yeah yeah
01:07:55
but he's he's pretty competitive so is
01:07:57
it a fun I mean I I guess you you only
01:08:00
know from what you've been talking about
01:08:01
are you laughing while you're doing it
01:08:03
you're laughing now we're laughing but
01:08:05
are you going full scent yeah we're
01:08:07
going close to four percent we're uh
01:08:10
um
01:08:11
or it's more the fact that no one wanted
01:08:13
to
01:08:14
um say the loss for some reason I don't
01:08:15
know but it was just a bizarre kind of
01:08:17
thing hey like what are you doing this
01:08:19
for
01:08:19
me yeah I was like hey you just let me
01:08:23
go and I'll let you go but it was like I
01:08:25
went to kind of like half flick going
01:08:26
and someone would come in and it was
01:08:28
yeah genuinely just trying to I don't
01:08:30
know choke each other out or something
01:08:31
but no it was um yeah it was it was
01:08:34
funny like I remember tickson next day I
01:08:37
was like what we got
01:08:42
it's the most rugby Rich story ever so
01:08:45
it said um one of the Frank's weddings
01:08:46
it's you and Eddie Alice and then um
01:08:48
Richie Morgan breaks the fighter yeah
01:08:51
yeah right well he no he doesn't break
01:08:54
it up he tries to um
01:08:56
uh so he was uh was now going to be here
01:09:00
he's now Owen's brother-in-law
01:09:02
um
01:09:03
so he was told to go in there and sort
01:09:06
us out and he's a young Academy
01:09:08
Chris uh obviously the young Prodigy
01:09:12
um and I'd never met him I don't think
01:09:15
at that point
01:09:16
um he comes in and I end up kind of
01:09:18
grabbing hold of him and giving him a
01:09:21
wee little choke as well taking him out
01:09:23
um
01:09:24
what's yours uh
01:09:26
that GD come in here and try and break
01:09:28
up this fight coming
01:09:30
um yeah and then I don't know how it
01:09:32
ended somehow it ended um and then the
01:09:34
funny thing also the next week is I meet
01:09:37
him in the gym Richie and I go up to him
01:09:40
because that's the type you know if I
01:09:42
meet a young guy I was like oh yeah hey
01:09:43
mate how are you I'm Kieran nice to meet
01:09:45
you yeah yeah you know oh just um you
01:09:49
know thinking it's first time I've ever
01:09:51
met this guy um and uh yeah and then
01:09:54
here's to his credit man he was just
01:09:55
like yeah nice to meet you too
01:09:57
he didn't say anything
01:10:00
um he didn't say anything about it and
01:10:01
then it wasn't until uh Andy uh paid me
01:10:05
out for
01:10:06
um that hey you do know that
01:10:09
oh geez yeah
01:10:12
in the book process that we were you
01:10:14
like oh do I share this so I don't share
01:10:16
that I mean there was no reason for that
01:10:18
story to ever get out
01:10:19
no but it was you know I was just like
01:10:21
so it's a fun story and it's more just
01:10:23
it's like ah
01:10:24
yeah it's a fun story to have and and um
01:10:27
to talk about and just shows kind of
01:10:30
I don't know what it shows to be honest
01:10:31
but it shows you real I think yeah it
01:10:33
shows you human yeah exactly and so it
01:10:36
was it was funny and those guys like
01:10:37
Andy's probably one of my best mates you
01:10:39
know
01:10:40
um and there's so many stories where
01:10:42
we're competitive against each other
01:10:43
even just their trainings
01:10:46
so annoying you know
01:10:47
a classic yeah so it was like you'd do
01:10:51
so much to try and you know but the guys
01:10:54
with the the the sharp voice used to
01:10:58
always piss me off so
01:11:00
um I'll just here try and get one over
01:11:03
them all the time to be honest oh that
01:11:05
sounds like a great relationship okay so
01:11:07
physically you're very healthy these
01:11:09
days um how's your mental health mental
01:11:11
health good yeah good mate thank you
01:11:12
yeah real good um yep really enjoying
01:11:15
life now
01:11:17
um at a slow pace and everything and and
01:11:20
just yeah and a good space loving being
01:11:22
yeah you know Dad and all that stuff so
01:11:24
did you did you slump into any sort of
01:11:26
um not necessarily a depression but like
01:11:28
a thunk after retiring it must be like
01:11:31
to go from the highs of being you know
01:11:33
one of the most successful all black
01:11:34
captains ever to you know to just just
01:11:36
being a civilian it must be like a huge
01:11:38
adjustment uh yeah it's a big adjustment
01:11:41
I've been I've been pretty good like I
01:11:43
was um planning a little bit of what I'm
01:11:44
gonna do like I'm into doing a bit of
01:11:46
work now so I've created kind of like my
01:11:48
own business around leadership
01:11:50
um doing a bit of kind of coaching and
01:11:51
mentoring stuff like that um
01:11:54
with different businesses
01:11:56
um and so that's for me is keeping me
01:11:58
busy
01:11:59
um
01:12:00
and I also can find time for myself to
01:12:03
go potentially go play some golf every
01:12:05
now and then and go see the kids sport
01:12:07
and look after them there so
01:12:09
um there's no not not saying there's
01:12:13
different times we ever have a quiet day
01:12:14
then you kind of go man you know what am
01:12:16
I doing or you know you think of a few
01:12:18
things but no in a really good really
01:12:20
good space yeah that's fantastic and I'm
01:12:23
in the room that we're sitting in which
01:12:24
is like a shrine to you it's um
01:12:26
I mean it must just give you immense
01:12:27
Pride like um looking around at some of
01:12:30
these um Treasures if that's what you
01:12:31
want to call them yeah I guess I like
01:12:33
its memories though and I say that's a
01:12:35
thing that for me is quite cool you know
01:12:37
every time you look at something up
01:12:38
there you know like there's Murray Field
01:12:40
up there which is where I played my
01:12:41
first um first test and so that just
01:12:43
brings back a few different memories and
01:12:45
and the connections you've had and and
01:12:46
the guys that you see on the on the
01:12:48
different things as well so
01:12:50
um yeah it's uh
01:12:52
yeah I I'm very enjoyed my time you know
01:12:55
like playing and doing that thing and I
01:12:57
can look back at it as it is a time of
01:13:00
my life you know that's a hell of a
01:13:01
career so you're going well
01:13:03
yeah I kind of don't need to search for
01:13:05
that anymore you know I can search for
01:13:08
something else yeah yeah absolutely and
01:13:10
what about running goals in the future
01:13:11
what are we going are we going to see
01:13:13
you on the start line at an old ghost or
01:13:14
is that 55 oh I don't know man I don't
01:13:16
know
01:13:17
yeah what would it take to get you oh
01:13:20
look honestly doing it with with a with
01:13:23
some friends you know like
01:13:25
it would be you know yourself or Scotty
01:13:28
or someone saying okay or my mate's
01:13:29
saying oh yeah we're gonna do it and
01:13:31
then you got something someone to train
01:13:32
with you got
01:13:33
someone to have some fun with and do it
01:13:35
like that you know like
01:13:37
um you know I'm not just gonna go out
01:13:38
there and do it myself
01:13:40
um it's all about probably doing it and
01:13:42
then enjoying each other's company
01:13:44
afterwards so yeah
01:13:46
um
01:13:49
I'm not sure what it will be in terms of
01:13:51
goals I don't
01:13:53
um yeah did this Adventure Race up in
01:13:55
Calcutta uh months ago which involved a
01:13:58
bit of biking trekking and different
01:14:00
stuff as well rogaines and stuff so and
01:14:02
that was quite cool you know it was a 12
01:14:04
hour race and
01:14:06
um you know it's you're going I like
01:14:08
those events that yep you're
01:14:10
you're pushing yourself but you're not
01:14:13
going flat Tech you know you know it's
01:14:14
not on the clock you you kind of sopping
01:14:17
a little bit to eat or you know whatever
01:14:19
and yeah it's enjoyable well if you're
01:14:21
looking for like a like a taster event I
01:14:23
recommend the root beer in classic it's
01:14:24
like 32ks but it's a hell of a run it's
01:14:27
beautiful yeah so yeah something like
01:14:29
that man it's probably
01:14:30
you know I think I'll keep going with it
01:14:32
you know definitely going to enjoy it
01:14:34
while I I can at the moment yeah until
01:14:37
the body packs up so oh maybe it won't
01:14:39
maybe it won't yeah it might not and
01:14:40
that's like a good look now yeah so you
01:14:43
know if it keeps going it keeps going
01:14:44
and um
01:14:45
I quite yeah as I said I'm bloody
01:14:48
enjoying it so yeah um keep the body
01:14:50
ticking over and if something pops up or
01:14:52
oh I see it up you know I'm not gonna go
01:14:55
and search for something but all those
01:14:57
type of Trail type event say is probably
01:15:00
the things that get me going yeah it's a
01:15:03
great Community to the trail running
01:15:04
Community real special group yeah they
01:15:06
all seem pretty pretty nice and I am
01:15:07
pretty connected and um
01:15:09
just enjoy what they do
01:15:11
yeah all right well Karen Reed it's been
01:15:13
an hour and a quarter now you've been so
01:15:15
generous with your time
01:15:17
it's probably a great place to end it no
01:15:19
worries mate appreciate it mate thank
01:15:20
you very much for all you've done for
01:15:22
New Zealand over the years we really
01:15:23
appreciate you and thanks for responding
01:15:25
to my request on LinkedIn yeah thanks
01:15:27
man yeah look I think um yeah it's
01:15:30
awesome and I'll just I'll put a plug in
01:15:31
here for you know anyone out there wants
01:15:33
to connect at all karenread.com uh this
01:15:37
is my website and uh go have a look look
01:15:39
at you networking yeah there we go
01:15:41
thanks mate Kieran Reed thanks very much
01:15:43
for listening all the way through I
01:15:45
really hope you enjoyed that episode if
01:15:46
you did enjoy it um the best sort of
01:15:48
marketing we can do to grow this uh
01:15:50
Community is Word of Mouth tell your
01:15:52
friends about it tell your family about
01:15:53
it if you can think of someone that you
01:15:55
think might like to hear it let them
01:15:57
know or share it on your social media
01:15:59
channel another thing you can do is um
01:16:01
just like or subscribe wherever you get
01:16:02
your podcast from and check out the five
01:16:05
star rating if you think it's worthy of
01:16:06
a five-star rating okay um thank you so
01:16:09
much I really appreciate you being here
01:16:11
I really appreciate where this thing is
01:16:13
going and it wouldn't be possible
01:16:15
without um without you guys love your
01:16:16
heaps thank you

Podspun Insights

In episode 26 of Runners Only, Dom Harvey welcomes the legendary Kieran Read, a former All Blacks captain and rugby superstar, who now finds joy in trail running. The episode kicks off with a lighthearted tour of Read's games room, filled with memorabilia from his illustrious career, including a poker table gifted by his teammates. As they settle in, Read reflects on his transition from rugby to running, revealing how he has shed over 10 kgs of muscle since hanging up his boots. The conversation flows effortlessly as they discuss the challenges and triumphs of ultra-marathons, with Read sharing tales of his 55-kilometer run on the Old Ghost Road, complete with helicopter rides and unexpected encounters with faster runners. The episode takes a deeper turn as Read opens up about the pressures of being an All Blacks captain, the emotional toll of injuries, and the impact of the Christchurch earthquake on his life and career. He candidly discusses his struggles with concussions and the importance of mental health, emphasizing the camaraderie he misses from his playing days. The duo also dives into Read's personal life, touching on his long-lasting relationship with his wife and the joys and challenges of parenting. With a mix of humor and heartfelt moments, this episode captures the essence of Read's journey, both on and off the field, leaving listeners inspired by his resilience and passion for life beyond rugby.

Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

  • 92
    Most heartwarming
  • 90
    Most emotional
  • 90
    Best performance
  • 90
    Most influential

Episode Highlights

  • The Burden of Leadership
    As captain, the responsibility weighs heavily, making it hard to switch off from the game.
    “As Captain, the responsibility is more on your shoulder.”
    @ 19m 46s
    October 20, 2022
  • Finding Balance on Tour
    Finding time to relax and switch off is crucial while on tour.
    “It’s about finding spaces to switch off.”
    @ 20m 04s
    October 20, 2022
  • Evolving Team Dynamics
    The All Blacks' culture has shifted towards vulnerability and connection over the years.
    “You show respect first and do this and do that.”
    @ 24m 51s
    October 20, 2022
  • Community Spirit Shines
    The community's support during tough times was truly inspiring, showcasing resilience and unity.
    “It really brought out the best in people.”
    @ 39m 37s
    October 20, 2022
  • A Tough Decision
    Facing a concussion, the athlete had to make the difficult choice to step back from the game.
    “I had to tell... I can't play.”
    @ 43m 22s
    October 20, 2022
  • Love Through the Years
    The athlete reflects on a long-lasting relationship that began in high school, highlighting its importance.
    “We've been together for 20 years now.”
    @ 51m 30s
    October 20, 2022
  • Leadership After Loss
    Reflecting on the challenges of showing leadership after a tough rugby loss.
    “It was the hardest time on a rugby field for me.”
    @ 58m 50s
    October 20, 2022
  • Final Game Reflections
    Looking back on the emotions of playing a final game for the All Blacks.
    “It was a cool moment to finish up and win that game.”
    @ 01h 05m 12s
    October 20, 2022
  • Life After Rugby
    Discussing the transition from rugby star to civilian life and new ventures.
    “I’ve created my own business around leadership.”
    @ 01h 11m 48s
    October 20, 2022
  • Kieran Reed's Community Impact
    Kieran Reed expresses gratitude for the trail running community and its support.
    “Thanks for all you’ve done for New Zealand over the years.”
    @ 01h 15m 22s
    October 20, 2022
  • Growing the Podcast
    Listeners are encouraged to share the podcast and help grow the community.
    “The best marketing we can do is Word of Mouth.”
    @ 01h 15m 46s
    October 20, 2022

Episode Quotes

Key Moments

  • Leadership Pressure19:47
  • Community Support37:25
  • Love Story51:30
  • Final Game1:05:12
  • Life Transition1:11:48
  • Trail Running Community1:15:03
  • Gratitude1:15:22
  • Podcast Growth1:15:46

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown

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