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g'day and welcome to Runners only with
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dom Harvey on this episode Matthew Ridge
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you know I came for the money I I didn't
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what was the money yeah it was around
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three quarters of a million back then
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which was heaps that was 95 96 97 98 you
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know my teammates are like the guys on
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five times as much as I am I'm playing
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better than he is and you know and then
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you know the papers were doing you know
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I was getting paid so much a minute
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Matthew Ridge better known to most new
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zealanders as Reggie is one of New
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Zealand's most talented Sports people
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ever he was a junior tennis champ
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briefly he was an all black then he went
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on to become one of the best and highest
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paid rugby league stars in the world
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then after sport he launched a very
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successful TV career on his own and as
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part of a comedy duo with Mark Ellis
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what can you say about Reggie he really
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is one of those guys whose reputation
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precedes him so I'm really excited to
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share this conversation with you guys
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and hear what you think maybe it'll
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change your opinion on Matthew maybe it
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won't either way the dude seems pretty
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comfortable in his own skin these days
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so I don't think he'll be faced too much
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either way all right let's get into it
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hope you enjoy it Matthew Ridge
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[Music]
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this is
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[Music]
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fast paced slow and steady anyway you
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coming just wanna connect for everyone
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who loves running hey Runners only with
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dime Harley
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red is only with Don Harvey and Matthew
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Reggie Rich g'day mate hey mate how are
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you doing yeah good good nice and close
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nice and close to that thing wow here we
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are sitting in my uh my new podcast
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Lounge yes it's um
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oh it's a little Lounge
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oh no it's it's me yeah I I first of all
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thanks for coming over I really
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appreciate it good when I when I reached
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out to you I thought uh slim chance at
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best because you you are even though
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you're a public guy you're also quite a
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quite a private guy you don't hear a lot
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about what you get up to these days yeah
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I've
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um I've sort of deliberately done that I
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guess with playing Sport and and then
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being involved in the media and doing
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television and that sort of stuff
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um when
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I use them in social media and all that
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sort of stuff came along
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I I just decided to take a deep dive and
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just you know like just stay out of the
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media and keep my head down and
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um and you know that was really good for
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my you know it's everybody talks about
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their mental health but it was really
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good for my mental health you know
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because you when you're I guess a public
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figure to a lesser extent but um you've
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always got to have your Shield up you
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know and because if you don't have your
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Shield up people especially in New
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Zealand or pretty much everywhere should
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everybody likes to take a pot shot you
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know so you're always you're always well
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armed and I I you know you you never get
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to you know to relax and um and you know
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when I had children I just decided look
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I just didn't want to be I didn't want
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to do that anymore I'm pleased that um
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you've brought up the mental health
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thing so early because it is a a fairly
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big focus on this podcast and I wanted
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to pick your brains about that because
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um [ __ ] we're getting we're going deep
00:03:21
we're going straight into it yeah yeah
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because you've always struck me as being
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a a total I don't give a [ __ ] kind of
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guy yeah but stuff still must hurt when
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you get caught riding around like
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shitless on a BMX and you're
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relentlessly trolled or bullied I guess
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you could even say anything in the media
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yeah you've got a hard [ __ ] time and
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you seem not care but I'm sure you do I
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you know anybody that says that you
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don't care about what people think about
00:03:45
you is probably not being entirely
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truthful but I I was
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armed by my grandmother when I was young
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and she was used to say to me never
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worry about day there's a collection of
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he she's of some butts and she used to
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drill that into me and Matthew always
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laughed loudest at yourself and you know
00:04:01
when you
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when you think like that it's it's easy
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to put an armor up and you can it's you
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know like you can let it's people kind
00:04:09
of offend you or whatever and you can it
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doesn't affect you but it does you know
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so
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um you know you wear that shield and all
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that sort of stuff and I I wore a shield
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for a long long time when people saying
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you know they're negative or whatever
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anybody that says it it doesn't hurt
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them is not being entirely treatable but
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I I like to think that
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I don't really care about other people's
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opinions you know as long as I'm being
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respectful as long as I've behaved
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myself I haven't stepped over the line I
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haven't done anything wrong I haven't
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been
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um you know I just haven't been a good
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human being then I've got nothing to
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worry about you know like not
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everybody's going to like you Don you
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know um and that's the truth yeah yeah
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and the thing is is this is the thing
00:04:52
that used to make me laugh is like you
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know when you're playing Sport and you
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you know when you're out in the arena
00:04:58
you're an entirely different person to
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the person you are off the field right
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so if you're a combative aggressive
00:05:04
person when you're playing sport it
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doesn't necessarily mean you're a
00:05:06
combative aggressive person off the
00:05:08
field you're just competitive good at
00:05:10
your job yeah and um you know like uh I
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was just competitive I wasn't
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particularly big strong fast but I was a
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competitor and and you know I'd get in
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people's faces and that's what I did and
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but away from the field I was a
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completely different person I'm not
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saying I was an angel but you know I'm
00:05:29
not up in everybody's face sort of thing
00:05:30
and
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um that was the thing for me I guess was
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you know like
00:05:35
you do television shows and you send
00:05:37
yourself up you make a bit of a joke of
00:05:39
yourself you know you you carry on like
00:05:41
a pork chop but you're making a TV show
00:05:43
you know like that's what it is it's
00:05:45
like so if you if you're not prepared to
00:05:48
take the Mickey out of yourself or to
00:05:49
push the boundaries or whatever like
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it's going to be real boring television
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show right you know so you you can't
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always be trying to you know
00:05:58
um have this image that hey I've got
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this image to create I had no problem in
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playing the bad guy or playing this guy
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or whatever anybody wanted me to do as
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long as if if it was going to rate or
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make good television or be a benefit to
00:06:12
what we were trying to do then I was all
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for it but that doesn't mean you're that
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person it's a character it's a character
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100 is a character and a lot of people
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don't get there so they see you on TV
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and they go I don't like that guy
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you just don't get it you know it's like
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you know you see the guys on movies or
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TV shows and you meet them and they're
00:06:32
completely different right so you know
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you and and the other thing you used to
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really tease me off a lot about people
00:06:39
in general actually is is people tend to
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form an opinion about somebody before
00:06:43
they've even met them and that is just a
00:06:46
big No-No you know you can't judge
00:06:48
somebody unless admit them and even if
00:06:50
when you've met them you shouldn't be
00:06:51
judging people because you know who are
00:06:53
you to judge you know like everybody's
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got their own story and their own trials
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and their own tribulations and and all
00:06:58
that sort of stuff so you know I think
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that you know we're real good at judging
00:07:02
people and and um and fast to do it as
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well real fast you know it's like you
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know like a few if you've never done
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anything wrong in your life or you're
00:07:11
perfect and yeah go for it but you know
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everybody makes mistakes
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um
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I've made Millions you know there's lots
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of things that I wish I hadn't have done
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or if I could now if I could speak to
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the young man back there and say hey you
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don't need to say that or you didn't
00:07:25
need to do that or you didn't need to
00:07:27
you know behave like this or whatever
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but you know that's
00:07:30
as you get older these are the things
00:07:32
you learn you know you just you get a
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little bit wiser you don't try and have
00:07:36
those you know like confrontations with
00:07:38
somebody just because you feel like your
00:07:41
point of view is
00:07:42
you know more important or you're right
00:07:45
and they're wrong you know like I just
00:07:47
yeah I think I think the The Edge as
00:07:49
soften as you get older as well don't
00:07:51
they and you learn yeah yeah I think so
00:07:53
but yeah oh definitely you know if you
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don't learn then yeah yeah
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um but it seems like there's um there's
00:08:00
people that don't know you that they
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will be like um oh Matthew Ridge he's
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arrogant or he's cocky or he's a tosser
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yeah and then you speak to anybody that
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knows you well I'm thinking of the
00:08:09
people that I know personally that know
00:08:10
you and yeah they'll they'll just go
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he's the most loyal yeah and honest
00:08:15
person you'll ever meet and he's there
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for you one thousand percent yep that's
00:08:19
probably you know like it's pretty good
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summation you know like if if you cross
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me then you're done but um you know like
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I will I've got a big heart and I I care
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about people and you know I try and
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you know I'm part the wisdom that I've
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learned as you know from from growing up
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I try to spend you know if people want
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to talk to me I started to spend time
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with them if um people need help I try
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to help them I mean one thing that
00:08:45
Springs to mind for me is when um uh
00:08:47
your old um teammate and for
00:08:49
interviewers um Brent Todd he got in
00:08:52
trouble got some fraud thing for ripping
00:08:54
off the poking machines or whatever he's
00:08:55
on home detention yeah and uh you you
00:08:57
had him at your house yeah which uh it
00:08:59
was a lovely gesture
00:09:01
yeah but you know like you know let's
00:09:03
talk about that they're fraud thing you
00:09:05
know like every just about every every
00:09:08
Publican or everybody that's got Pokey
00:09:10
machines is getting a kickback so you
00:09:14
know you get a kick back one way or the
00:09:15
other and sure it might be illegal but
00:09:16
that's just how it is you know so so if
00:09:19
I want some money from a pokey guy he
00:09:21
goes hey look can you give me this and
00:09:23
just give me a little bit back and I'm
00:09:25
like oh okay cool that just happened
00:09:27
there were heaps of guys that were doing
00:09:28
it I won't name names but there were
00:09:30
heaps the guys that were doing it and
00:09:31
toddy was just a poor guy right and he
00:09:33
put his hand up and and he got his you
00:09:35
know it was really hard for Brent
00:09:37
because he's got a massive heart and he
00:09:40
really cares about what other people
00:09:42
have thought of him everybody loved him
00:09:43
right and then so all of a sudden you
00:09:45
know Brent Todd's frauds to do you know
00:09:47
like and his best mates Matthew Ridge
00:09:49
who's an absolute [ __ ] right so so
00:09:52
you know like you know that they're made
00:09:54
for one another but you know I can
00:09:55
remember when Tony came into my house
00:09:57
and uh he was broken you know his head
00:09:59
was down and I said hey maybe leave here
00:10:02
in 12 months time you're going to walk
00:10:03
out here with the edel diet and and he
00:10:06
did you know like but he knuckled down
00:10:07
he came and worked for me you know he
00:10:09
lived at home for 12 months he could
00:10:11
come to work and then he'd have to go
00:10:12
home and you know there wasn't a cross
00:10:14
we didn't say crossword in 12 months you
00:10:16
know it was it was a real privilege to
00:10:18
have him in my house what was that like
00:10:20
basically becoming flatmates again yeah
00:10:22
growing ass man yeah it was it was
00:10:25
actually really cool like it was you
00:10:26
know like he he like I say he he was
00:10:28
broken you know like he'd gone through a
00:10:30
lot he'd gone from being at the top of
00:10:32
the pile to the bottom of the pole and
00:10:34
that's that's not easy when you're at
00:10:35
the top of the pole and then all of a
00:10:36
sudden you're at the bottom of the pole
00:10:37
and everybody loves to kick you and
00:10:39
you're down you know and my people were
00:10:41
laying into them right and you know
00:10:43
there are a lot of people that I was
00:10:45
pretty upset with who um you know should
00:10:47
have been there for him but putting the
00:10:49
boot into him you know so I think I saw
00:10:51
this on a Lance Armstrong documentary he
00:10:53
said when the [ __ ] hits the fan there's
00:10:54
two sorts of people those that sort of
00:10:56
lean in and those that sort of lean out
00:10:57
yeah and it's a great way to find out
00:10:59
who your realm is yeah yeah there's not
00:11:00
many people leaning didn't know [ __ ] man
00:11:02
there's so much to unpack with you first
00:11:04
of all I want to I want to say um like I
00:11:07
feel like everywhere you go in New
00:11:08
Zealand people call you Reggie you must
00:11:10
hear Reggie being yelled yeah yeah um
00:11:12
but when we were texting backwards and
00:11:13
forwards you used Matthew yeah does
00:11:16
Reggie feel like a character like the TV
00:11:18
character yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
00:11:20
Reggie or regular you know a lot of
00:11:23
people call me reg and that you know
00:11:24
like I think calling someone by their
00:11:26
second name
00:11:28
it reminds me of being at school and you
00:11:31
know like it's it's a little bit
00:11:32
disrespectful I think you know like I
00:11:34
don't go around calling Hey Harvey or
00:11:36
you know like you're yeah it's very
00:11:38
scholar it's just it's just weird you
00:11:40
know so you know you're born with a
00:11:42
first name and so I I like to use my
00:11:45
first name
00:11:46
um you know I'm not well I don't worry
00:11:48
if people can't be Reggie but if someone
00:11:49
calls me Ridge I'm like yeah yeah good
00:11:53
one you know it's just say right I just
00:11:56
don't like it it's just like for me it's
00:11:58
just it sounds like you're you're really
00:12:01
wanting to have a go at me you know hey
00:12:03
Ridge it's like are you
00:12:06
there he is is that right you know like
00:12:09
so yeah like I still wouldn't want to
00:12:11
[ __ ] with you hey like you've meled a
00:12:13
lot but even then yeah I'm not a fighter
00:12:16
or anything I've never never have been
00:12:18
but I've got a sharp tongue you know and
00:12:20
you've got a look that you can do and I
00:12:21
can normally I can normally get under
00:12:23
people's skin pretty quickly it's a
00:12:25
skill that I have and I can find it I
00:12:27
can find their weakness real quick yeah
00:12:29
okay so um yeah let's go uh right back
00:12:32
so um you're born in Rotorua did you get
00:12:34
mistaken for being Maori a lot yes I did
00:12:36
get mistaken for being Maori and and
00:12:39
that that wasn't an issue you know like
00:12:41
I had no problem with that but I was a
00:12:43
proud you know my mother always kept my
00:12:46
my Heritage at the Forefront of my
00:12:49
learnings I guess as I was growing up so
00:12:50
I was very proud Armenian even though
00:12:52
nobody knew where Armenia was and you
00:12:54
know all that sort of stuff so you know
00:12:56
but I I didn't have an issue with being
00:12:58
Molly or anything like that and I was
00:12:59
you know as you say I was born in
00:13:00
Rotorua my mum lived down there we live
00:13:03
with the family and
00:13:04
um luckily enough for us was my
00:13:07
grandmother convinced my grandfather to
00:13:09
drive down and and pick us up when I was
00:13:12
about one and my grandfather was a he
00:13:15
was a real cool dude but came from a
00:13:17
time where you know he was English and
00:13:20
and people were more racist then than
00:13:22
they are now you know so so he for him
00:13:25
to come and pick me up
00:13:27
um with my grandmother was a big thing
00:13:29
because I I was I was very dark so you
00:13:32
know like it wasn't something and back
00:13:34
in those days you know you got married
00:13:36
before you had children all that sort of
00:13:38
stuff so it was it was a very foreign
00:13:39
thing for my for my grandfather but
00:13:41
luckily they they they came down and got
00:13:44
me because they raised me and I would be
00:13:46
a very different person of
00:13:48
um you know my mum was obviously you
00:13:50
know in my life but my grandparents were
00:13:51
in my life 24 7. yeah and you and you
00:13:54
you started playing uh you gravitated
00:13:55
towards tennis and you were bloody good
00:13:57
I was speaking to a guy who I wish I
00:13:59
could remember his name I met him at a
00:14:00
function a few weeks ago and he said he
00:14:01
played with you and you were like real
00:14:03
good like uh like as good as let's say
00:14:06
Britt Stevens Chris Lewis Kelly givendon
00:14:08
like oh you could play like I've played
00:14:10
against bread four or five times and I
00:14:11
beat him a couple of times I think he'd
00:14:13
be more than I beat him but but um yeah
00:14:15
the last time we we played was probably
00:14:17
when we were 15 or 16 so but yeah I was
00:14:20
yeah I was a good tennis player but back
00:14:22
in those days um
00:14:24
I I felt like tennis was very if you
00:14:27
weren't the right color
00:14:29
and you didn't have the right upbringing
00:14:31
then tennis wasn't going to be a sport
00:14:33
in New Zealand you know it was it was
00:14:35
and especially if you I I was I was
00:14:37
aggressive I was you know I wanted to
00:14:39
win I I issues keeping my um temper
00:14:42
under control so
00:14:44
what but I never had we let everyone
00:14:48
like yeah yeah John Mcenroe is yeah I
00:14:51
was definitely like those guys but but
00:14:53
um
00:14:54
but yeah but we we had nobody we had no
00:14:57
one to you know like it's the thing
00:14:59
about young athletes is if you get
00:15:01
somebody who identifies that you're a
00:15:05
talent and they can arm you with the
00:15:09
right tools I would have been sweet but
00:15:11
I wasn't armed with the right tools so
00:15:13
so everybody told me you can't do that
00:15:15
instead of saying hey why don't you
00:15:17
Channel your energy like this and you
00:15:21
know like I can see you really care so
00:15:23
much about winning and stuff but you
00:15:25
know you don't need to let your
00:15:26
opposition know how pissed off you are
00:15:28
because as soon as you take it as soon
00:15:30
as your mentality goes especially in
00:15:32
tennis as soon as you start losing your
00:15:35
head it's all over right you're beating
00:15:37
right so so but I had nobody to tell me
00:15:39
so hey instead of getting so frustrated
00:15:41
why don't you just try and channel that
00:15:43
frustration into the next point you know
00:15:46
and things like that so like if I could
00:15:49
speak to that guy now you know that
00:15:51
young boy now of with the stuff that I
00:15:53
know now like I I probably would have
00:15:56
played tennis or played soccer or
00:15:58
whatever you know I definitely want to
00:15:59
play rugby or rugby league because you
00:16:01
were quite a late starter right like you
00:16:02
didn't play context sport until like 15.
00:16:05
I played soccer I was I was a I was a
00:16:08
good soccer player and and that's what
00:16:09
made me a good rugby player and a good
00:16:12
lead player because it gave me the
00:16:13
ability to you know soccer's about
00:16:15
reading play and all that sort of stuff
00:16:17
and I had
00:16:18
um Vision
00:16:20
um which enabled me to be in the right
00:16:21
place at the right time so if I you
00:16:23
didn't have the pace or the power but if
00:16:25
you had the vision the ability to read
00:16:26
the game then you ended up being the
00:16:28
right spot and that's that's pretty much
00:16:29
what I had so but um yeah I if if I was
00:16:34
born in Europe I definitely wouldn't
00:16:37
have been a rugby player or or a lead
00:16:40
player I would have been a soccer player
00:16:42
or a tennis player 100 yeah so you know
00:16:45
that's and it kind of like I don't have
00:16:47
any regrets but I kind of do I I think I
00:16:50
I went the wrong way I said what do you
00:16:53
mean how so I should this I should I I
00:16:55
definitely much better soccer player
00:16:57
than I was a rugby player you know
00:17:00
um but you know but my decision back
00:17:03
then was I wanted to be a professional
00:17:04
athlete and there were no Avenue so
00:17:06
there was no pathway for soccer players
00:17:08
in you know so you know if I become an
00:17:10
all black then I'll get a good job you
00:17:12
know that that was my thinking so I sort
00:17:15
of stopped playing tennis and stopped
00:17:16
playing soccer and have you tried any
00:17:18
sports that you sucked at it seems like
00:17:20
you just naturally good at whatever you
00:17:24
well I'm not good at Water Sports you
00:17:26
know like I I can't surf or anything
00:17:28
like that yeah I wasn't a great swimmer
00:17:30
I I was good at primary school and stuff
00:17:32
but yeah I think Ball Sports and all
00:17:35
that sort of stuff I just had good hand
00:17:36
eyes so yeah so you made the um you made
00:17:38
the uh the all black Squad to tour
00:17:40
Britain in uh like 1989
00:17:42
1989. how old were you then what were
00:17:45
you then uh so I just turned 21 I think
00:17:47
right yeah actually you'd only been
00:17:48
playing like rugby six years and yeah I
00:17:50
I mean we're playing at school and stuff
00:17:52
so seven eight years probably yeah I
00:17:54
played a primary school you know making
00:17:56
a round button not not seriously you
00:17:58
know but um you know you just play on
00:18:00
The Paddock and that sort of stuff but I
00:18:01
hadn't played Club rugby or anything and
00:18:03
yeah and then made the All Blacks it
00:18:05
feels like an absolute lifetime ago you
00:18:07
know it is it's over it's well over half
00:18:09
your life ago yeah yeah but it's it's
00:18:11
you know the things you remember and the
00:18:14
feelings that you have the people that
00:18:16
you meet the teammates that I played
00:18:18
with and you know you know it was it was
00:18:20
a pretty special time in my life to you
00:18:22
know to make the old base now the old
00:18:24
base now is you know real cool but back
00:18:25
in those days being an all black was a
00:18:28
bill and end-all you know like it's
00:18:29
there was nothing else there wasn't
00:18:31
rugby league or there was rugby Lee but
00:18:32
not really and you know there was soccer
00:18:34
but it wasn't really like it was the
00:18:37
number one sport by a lion a wild right
00:18:39
so to be to be an all black was you know
00:18:41
every kid's dream right so and you know
00:18:44
we were schools were geared to rugby
00:18:46
everything was geared to rugby so to
00:18:47
have that opportunity and to you know to
00:18:49
make the all base with you know some of
00:18:51
my you know schoolmates and and
00:18:53
clubmates was was pretty amazing yeah
00:18:55
have you are you much of a memorabilia
00:18:57
guy like do you have any of them where's
00:18:59
all the gear going no no I don't have
00:19:01
any I have I've got a you know I pretty
00:19:03
much give well did you only get one you
00:19:04
didn't get one because you played you
00:19:06
didn't play anything yeah I think yeah I
00:19:08
think you get a couple of jerseys but
00:19:10
the first jersey that you play play and
00:19:12
you you get I think I might have got a
00:19:14
couple but I gave one to so moderate she
00:19:17
was he was a guy that got me into soccer
00:19:18
I'm a book collection I found your book
00:19:21
um take no prisoners which um it's uh
00:19:23
it's like a time capsule how was that
00:19:25
how was that now like 30 something I
00:19:26
don't know like um it came out like
00:19:28
about the two things in the 90s 90 95 96
00:19:32
I think yeah
00:19:33
um
00:19:34
yeah and that was that yeah it was
00:19:36
it was an interesting book there because
00:19:38
I was um you know in a pretty rough
00:19:41
place
00:19:42
um I'd come back I was playing for the
00:19:44
Warriors
00:19:45
I was the highest paid player like
00:19:48
definitely in the worries but in the top
00:19:49
two or three in the game you know I'd
00:19:51
come back to a club off a high of
00:19:54
winning a Premiership and that sort of
00:19:55
stuff and then into an outfit that was
00:19:57
pretty average to be honest
00:20:00
um you know off the phone A lot's
00:20:01
changed since then yeah
00:20:04
um but but I I guess I knew what I was
00:20:05
coming back into you know I came for the
00:20:07
money I I didn't what was the money yeah
00:20:09
it was around three quarters of a
00:20:11
million back then was which was heaps so
00:20:13
which would be so how many years ago are
00:20:15
we talking what's that was 95 96 97 98
00:20:19
95 so that'd be uh that's the equivalent
00:20:21
to say two and a half million a year
00:20:23
yeah it was big money it was a big money
00:20:24
and then you know
00:20:26
yeah then what came with it was you know
00:20:28
like all the drama that came with it so
00:20:31
you know I put a lot of pressure on
00:20:33
myself to play well and you know I
00:20:35
started copping injuries and that sort
00:20:36
of stuff and then The Treasure of the
00:20:38
club or the guy that you know pretty
00:20:39
much ran the books he leaked my wage to
00:20:42
the uh to the media and all that sort of
00:20:44
stuff and then you know I had issues
00:20:46
with you know my teammates are like the
00:20:49
guys on five times as much as I am I'm
00:20:51
playing better than he is and you know I
00:20:53
was it was just an absolute night it's
00:20:56
not great for morale is it no it's just
00:20:58
it was so bad you know like I was and
00:21:01
and in those days you you went to talk
00:21:03
about what you made so for this guy to
00:21:06
leak this out and then you know the
00:21:08
papers were doing you know I was getting
00:21:10
paid so much a minute and it was it was
00:21:13
it was a really mean I was a real shitty
00:21:17
time mate like it was just you know like
00:21:19
and you could see you know like
00:21:21
the players you know some of them really
00:21:24
had an issue with it you know and it's
00:21:26
not it's not conducive to being you know
00:21:28
to to playing well as a team you know if
00:21:30
one guy's getting paid [ __ ] loads more
00:21:32
than everybody else then you know
00:21:34
there's jealousy and there's envy and
00:21:36
there's all those sorts of things and
00:21:37
you know then you're not playing well
00:21:39
and then you're putting pressure on
00:21:40
yourself to play where you're coming
00:21:41
back and trying to play when you're
00:21:42
injured and I was playing with some
00:21:44
serious injuries you know I wasn't
00:21:46
making any excuses for it but and
00:21:49
playing in a team that really had no
00:21:51
backbone and you know like you know I
00:21:55
was one part of a very successful team
00:21:57
at manly you know they they talk about
00:21:59
the spine but we didn't have a spine we
00:22:02
were you know like we were just pretty
00:22:03
average across the park and um even
00:22:06
though individually we were good we just
00:22:08
didn't have the mentality you know and
00:22:10
nothing's changed the mentality in sport
00:22:12
is the most important thing is your
00:22:14
mental toughness and your ability to to
00:22:17
bounce back and to you know to hang in
00:22:19
the dog fight and all that sort of stuff
00:22:20
the Warriors they've never had it or
00:22:23
they had maybe 2001 2002 2003 they had
00:22:27
it for a bit when Cleary was you know
00:22:29
when he was coaching but
00:22:31
it's just not there and I don't think it
00:22:33
ever will be yeah it's just just jinxed
00:22:36
I don't know if it's Jinx I just think
00:22:38
like well now you just need to clean
00:22:39
that place out it's just it's now it's
00:22:41
just a joke you know like and you know I
00:22:44
I don't think the players are honest
00:22:46
enough with each other you know like I
00:22:48
you know like I actually I've read
00:22:50
something in a paper the other day that
00:22:52
that is starting to give you give it to
00:22:54
each other on the field well well maybe
00:22:55
they should you know like you need to
00:22:57
have an honest conversation with guys
00:22:59
because you know you need to say hey
00:23:00
mate you're not making your tackles
00:23:02
you're playing like a deck you know you
00:23:04
shouldn't be up here you know like
00:23:05
that's the thing you know like you win a
00:23:07
Premiership on defense it's not hard to
00:23:09
tackle it's just commitment it's just
00:23:11
mind over matter and putting your body
00:23:13
on the line right and just getting your
00:23:15
getting your your team to do the same
00:23:17
thing right and and that's what we
00:23:19
always had we always had problems with
00:23:20
you know like guys on the team always
00:23:22
have weaknesses and and players with
00:23:24
other teams would work it out and they
00:23:25
just attack those weaknesses and if your
00:23:28
defensive line is weak and the Warriors
00:23:30
have always had a pretty weak defensive
00:23:31
line except
00:23:33
2002 2003 you know like when they've
00:23:36
made those runs they've been brutal
00:23:39
right but the consistency is just not
00:23:41
there so
00:23:43
um it wasn't a fun time well and I I
00:23:45
can't imagine so
00:23:46
um yeah you brought that up because I
00:23:48
mentioned mentioned the book but we're
00:23:50
skipping all the all the good stuff the
00:23:51
glory years the the almost the decade
00:23:54
that you had at manly so so there's a
00:23:56
guy called John Gallagher who's um who's
00:23:58
playing for the All Blacks yeah
00:24:00
ginger-headed dude yeah let the staff
00:24:02
fall back so you're like I don't have a
00:24:03
chance yeah making the team did you want
00:24:07
to lift anywhere like I wasn't like I
00:24:08
didn't have a chance of making the team
00:24:09
I was real close to I was real close on
00:24:12
that tour to
00:24:13
um nudging him out I can remember that
00:24:15
um he was
00:24:17
we were playing I made the subs against
00:24:21
Ireland so I was on the bench against
00:24:23
Ireland and Kevin got an injury and I
00:24:25
was like come on and like he looked over
00:24:28
and there was no way he was going to get
00:24:30
that opportunity like so he he just
00:24:32
gassed it out but um
00:24:34
but um you know just to get on the bench
00:24:36
back and though see they're like to get
00:24:38
a test back in those days to get on the
00:24:39
bench was hard right and then in those
00:24:41
days you didn't get onto the field
00:24:43
unless somebody was injured so there was
00:24:45
no interchange you just sat there you
00:24:48
know like you got on the bench and you
00:24:49
hoped that someone got injured because
00:24:50
the 15 players would pretty much just
00:24:52
played through whereas now you make the
00:24:54
side you're guaranteed a you know a
00:24:56
run-on yeah
00:24:58
even if they're not you know just so
00:25:01
they wheel out the subscribe so it's
00:25:04
like like it's it's not I won't say it's
00:25:07
easy to get a camp now but back in those
00:25:09
days it was just harder to get a cap you
00:25:10
know so you had to hang around and well
00:25:12
yeah you just have to look at the
00:25:13
numbers now like how many how many years
00:25:15
over 100 caps yeah yeah yeah exactly so
00:25:18
um I was gonna say so rugby was amateur
00:25:21
so there was no money there's no money
00:25:22
right so was money so but you you guys
00:25:25
both announced you were leaving rugby to
00:25:27
play league around about the same time
00:25:28
well I didn't know so so I think he left
00:25:30
because he was like [ __ ] no no no he
00:25:32
lived for money like keep away for money
00:25:34
it's the same same reason I did but but
00:25:37
um by the way yeah well see I when I
00:25:40
went to well after the tour I went to
00:25:42
Italy
00:25:43
and I played for a club called peartenza
00:25:45
in the north of Italy and I was there
00:25:47
for a couple of months or maybe just
00:25:49
over two months and I absolutely loved
00:25:51
it I got paid I was getting like 2 000
00:25:53
Lira it was nothing it wasn't maybe
00:25:55
three thousand dollars a month but it
00:25:57
was mean because there was a lot for me
00:25:59
you know and I was living in another
00:26:01
country and just so I had absolute balls
00:26:03
playing you know rugby over there and it
00:26:05
was just cool anyway John Hart rang me
00:26:08
up and said get your you know backside
00:26:10
back here you know you need to get back
00:26:12
home so I came back I reluctantly came
00:26:15
back and I was like
00:26:17
skiona University and then I got home
00:26:19
from uni and I had a message on my
00:26:21
aunt's phone it was Graham Lowe and he
00:26:22
was like hey mate just wondering if
00:26:24
you'd want to come play rugby league I
00:26:26
didn't even think about it like
00:26:28
seriously I I gave it no thought
00:26:30
whatsoever said hell yeah and um so I
00:26:33
rang him up and said yeah mate bloody
00:26:35
oath and he flew over he saw me and he
00:26:38
said oh what do you think you're worth I
00:26:39
said oh I don't know and he just wrote
00:26:41
on this um because I didn't know I
00:26:43
didn't have a [ __ ] clue you didn't
00:26:44
have the balls to say it or no but I
00:26:46
just didn't know right I didn't know
00:26:47
what I was with I had no idea do you
00:26:49
have any idea what other people were
00:26:50
getting no no nothing
00:26:52
um you know we you know we'd heard that
00:26:54
maybe someone was on 100 Grand or 50
00:26:55
Grand I I don't know I can't remember
00:26:57
but but anyway I went and met with them
00:26:59
over at um
00:27:01
are the Panama across the shore
00:27:03
he said oh what do you think you're
00:27:04
worth and I was like um not sure and he
00:27:07
just scribbled down on a serviette and
00:27:09
passed it back over to me it was like 35
00:27:11
Grand and 65 for the second year and I
00:27:14
was and and then he was like and fifteen
00:27:16
hundred dollars a one and I said how
00:27:18
many games are there a year and he got
00:27:19
some there's 20 odd if you make the
00:27:21
semis but so okay if we make it two
00:27:23
grand to win
00:27:24
two grand a draw and uh fifteen hundred
00:27:27
dollars a loss I'm in and he said no you
00:27:29
can't have the loss I said Okay a
00:27:32
thousand bikes loss and it was a
00:27:34
thousand base of loss and I saw and I
00:27:35
happily signed and then when I got over
00:27:37
there I just lost kicking ass I was like
00:27:39
[ __ ] what have I done but um and I
00:27:41
remember storming into his office in
00:27:44
about six weeks saying Graham you've
00:27:48
ripped me off mate and
00:27:50
um because I made the kiwis I've made
00:27:52
the keys after four games so I was
00:27:54
kicking ass were you a bit better than
00:27:56
what you thought you would be or no no I
00:27:58
just no I just I I just I just happen to
00:28:01
be kicking goals and just you know like
00:28:03
I was just doing my job and I'd gone
00:28:05
past your expectations and mine I guess
00:28:07
and I stormed into his office and he
00:28:09
said maybe we've got a contract and you
00:28:11
know we did but to be fair grammar he
00:28:13
organized me a job over there which was
00:28:15
just to pretty much a give me Mrs Hart
00:28:18
um like my eyes arranged so I was
00:28:20
working for line and you know that I was
00:28:23
on a good weekend by the time through
00:28:24
all that stuff and so I didn't really
00:28:26
have much to complain about but yeah um
00:28:28
a hell of a time there with me actually
00:28:29
the time we are um recording this
00:28:31
podcast at some Late July 2022 and the
00:28:35
big news story over the last couple of
00:28:36
days has been about the manly Jersey
00:28:38
um with a rainbow strip on and seven of
00:28:41
the players uh for religious reasons
00:28:43
don't want to play now you play you you
00:28:45
played in uh for manly in the 1990s when
00:28:47
Ian Roberts I think the only openly yeah
00:28:51
League player and a hard bastard as well
00:28:53
was playing and yeah mum's um as well
00:28:56
yeah what are you what are your thoughts
00:28:57
on all this oh look
00:28:59
no not at all I think it's their own you
00:29:02
know like I I think you know everyone's
00:29:04
got their their beliefs and all that
00:29:06
sort of stuff but you know we're all
00:29:08
people in the end so and we can't help
00:29:10
who we are you know so I I've got to say
00:29:13
you know I think the religious aspect I
00:29:15
think you know it's while it might be
00:29:17
wrong religiously to be I I I just I
00:29:20
just I think religions
00:29:22
yeah it causes a lot of yeah we need to
00:29:25
ban religion eh yeah if religion wasn't
00:29:28
around I don't think there'd be as many
00:29:29
issues as we've got you know like I mean
00:29:31
this you know like I I believe in some
00:29:34
sort of higher power but I certainly
00:29:35
don't believe there's a guy out there as
00:29:37
a god he's got a beard and all that sort
00:29:38
of stuff and yeah I believe there was a
00:29:40
Jesus back in the day who was just uh
00:29:42
you know charismatic Tony Robbins yeah
00:29:44
highly Advanced you know human being you
00:29:47
know you know there's all this stuff we
00:29:49
put all these things all these people on
00:29:51
a pedestal and this religion on a
00:29:53
pedestal it's it's a bit of a joke if
00:29:56
you ask me I think you just gotta you
00:29:59
know like there'll be a lot of people
00:30:00
out there that'll go oh you know how can
00:30:01
he say that but you know like
00:30:03
I I think you've just got to use some
00:30:05
common sense and all of this and he
00:30:07
didn't walk on water and all that sort
00:30:08
of stuff you put in faith you know
00:30:10
you've got to have faith I said well
00:30:12
have you show me anybody that can walk
00:30:13
on water
00:30:15
you know is anybody since then walked on
00:30:18
water no you know like is anybody
00:30:21
in Disguise and you know like and as you
00:30:25
know I've risen up to the ever since I'm
00:30:27
like no okay but do I believe in the
00:30:29
universe and do I believe in karma and
00:30:32
yes absolutely you know I I I I
00:30:35
absolutely believe in all that stuff but
00:30:37
do I believe in God
00:30:39
um no I don't know how we got on to that
00:30:41
but yeah so you know so so being gay so
00:30:44
like so hey look if you're gay you're
00:30:47
gay you know like I mean there's there's
00:30:48
no there's no way around it there's
00:30:51
nothing wrong with it you know like
00:30:52
embrace it you know why is it why is it
00:30:55
why is being gay any different to being
00:30:57
straight
00:30:58
there's no difference you know so
00:31:01
I just you know like
00:31:04
life's hard enough as it is just Embrace
00:31:06
everybody you know respect everybody
00:31:08
like you know we're all put on this
00:31:11
Earth
00:31:12
to do something right nobody's better
00:31:14
than anybody else
00:31:16
um I don't care whether you're you're
00:31:17
rich you're poor or whatever you've just
00:31:19
got to treat everybody the same way and
00:31:21
everybody deserves that respect you know
00:31:24
we're there it's a bigger in the street
00:31:25
you know we've all got a story to tell
00:31:27
you know the the coolest scene that I
00:31:30
always find is when you smile at people
00:31:33
and you engage with people you know like
00:31:34
anywhere in the world this happens to be
00:31:36
anywhere in the world where people know
00:31:38
me or don't know me or whatever if you
00:31:40
smile and you engage with people
00:31:42
like it's just so much easier everything
00:31:45
just flows you know if you put out
00:31:47
you're angry or you're aggressive or you
00:31:50
know that's guess what you're going to
00:31:52
get back you're going to get that back
00:31:53
yeah you get what you get you give what
00:31:55
you give so so and you're like it's just
00:31:58
it's so much easier to give people a
00:31:59
smile you know when people are pissed
00:32:00
off or you're going to a shop and then
00:32:03
they rude to you or whatever or like
00:32:05
just let it go you know like we've all
00:32:07
everybody runs around not thinking that
00:32:09
they're special with everybody's you
00:32:11
know like once you get you you go under
00:32:12
control things change like trust me like
00:32:14
if you can get your ego under control
00:32:15
because that's just a phantom thing that
00:32:17
we all have right once you get that
00:32:19
under control nobody can hurt you it's
00:32:21
easy but we teach the wrong stuff in
00:32:24
school we don't arm our children with
00:32:25
the right tools we're all we all think
00:32:28
we're super special and and we are a yes
00:32:30
to a certain extent but hey we're all
00:32:32
the same you know we've all got the same
00:32:34
wants needs we all want to be loved we
00:32:35
want to be careful we all want to be
00:32:37
important but you've got to earn that
00:32:39
right and you know it's not just given
00:32:41
to you on a planet
00:32:42
thank God I wasn't born or raised in
00:32:45
this era with social media and stuff all
00:32:47
right for me that is just the biggest
00:32:49
load of [ __ ] I've ever seen in my life
00:32:51
it's dangerous isn't it it's so bad like
00:32:54
you know there's a reason why I bring
00:32:56
that up let's say so if I was playing
00:32:59
when social media was around I would
00:33:01
have been [ __ ] terrible oh we let us
00:33:04
swear yeah it's a podcast what I mean
00:33:06
bloody awful right um well reading your
00:33:09
book mate like there's so many stories
00:33:11
in there where you think that person
00:33:12
would have been canceled like Jeremy we
00:33:14
would have been nice with the whole all
00:33:16
of us would have been canceled like you
00:33:17
know you're not allowed to do anything
00:33:19
right so there's a story in the uh the
00:33:22
newspaper yesterday about some of the
00:33:23
All Blacks walking through the airport
00:33:24
without masks on and some guy came and
00:33:26
told them off and it's like I'm thinking
00:33:27
the day before this I was reading
00:33:29
reading Matthew's book and he talks
00:33:31
about Jared McCracken throwing a glass
00:33:32
at you and yeah yeah hitting a lady and
00:33:34
yeah yeah Monday thing and one of your
00:33:37
teammates ripping a shirt off a kid oh
00:33:39
man it was just yeah so yeah those days
00:33:41
like social media and something and
00:33:43
there's a reason I don't do it I don't
00:33:46
want anything no because it's a waste of
00:33:48
time you know like honestly I'd rather
00:33:49
be living my life you know I think it's
00:33:50
good to you know some extent you know
00:33:52
you can keep in touch with people all
00:33:53
that sort of stuff but hey keep in touch
00:33:55
by phone or what I I just rather be out
00:33:57
there doing it you know like and you
00:34:00
know all these influences and all that
00:34:01
stuff how are you an influencer like
00:34:03
like it's you know like what have you
00:34:06
actually done like what have you
00:34:07
actually done to like or have you just
00:34:10
created some little thing and you look
00:34:12
real cool or real funny in your bedroom
00:34:14
or whatever I'm like there's just so
00:34:16
much [ __ ] like we just got to get on
00:34:17
with it you know like life's for a
00:34:19
living not like these things like phones
00:34:21
they're awesome ma'am you put your phone
00:34:24
down all your issues disappear I just I
00:34:26
I'm so glad that I am the age I am and
00:34:30
that I am not in that era because I I
00:34:32
just I I feel sorry for you've been like
00:34:35
a father
00:34:36
um several times over over yeah five
00:34:38
times but you've um you've had to like
00:34:40
navigate that I guess with with your
00:34:42
kids now you have young kids and that's
00:34:43
good yeah yeah but you don't like
00:34:45
changing again absolutely but I I think
00:34:47
you have to arm your kids you know you
00:34:48
have to be present when you're with your
00:34:50
children you know and you
00:34:52
you know when you bring children into
00:34:53
the world it's it's a it's a big thing
00:34:55
it's not it's not a joke you know you're
00:34:57
responsible for for a little human being
00:34:59
and and I want to make sure that my
00:35:02
children are you know a balanced loved
00:35:05
they feel kid for a nurtured they you
00:35:09
know and I I think if you if you do
00:35:12
you know
00:35:13
if you do a good job raising your
00:35:15
children then you've you've been a good
00:35:17
human being you know you're putting out
00:35:19
a you know like I'm really proud of all
00:35:22
my kids and it can't be easy being
00:35:25
um you know me being their father you
00:35:27
know it's it's obviously a little bit
00:35:29
different now but for for Jamie and
00:35:30
Boston it would have been hard you know
00:35:32
they're the older two from your first
00:35:34
marriage with Sally how old are they now
00:35:36
so Boston's 25 and Jamie's
00:35:39
28 this month yeah and um and she's just
00:35:42
recently become a mother
00:35:44
become a Granddad yeah so I just I I
00:35:46
went over there and I I met um just we
00:35:48
just came back from last week actually
00:35:50
so he's five months old which was which
00:35:52
was real nice but um it certainly makes
00:35:54
you feel old there's no doubt about it
00:35:56
you know you look like the world's most
00:35:59
buff granddad I'll tell you what no no
00:36:01
no but um anyway so yeah it's been um
00:36:04
it's been an interesting ride on my tea
00:36:06
there but you know oh it's back to
00:36:09
children like that's the most important
00:36:11
thing you'll do in your life without a
00:36:13
doubt you know everything I've ever done
00:36:15
I I I can remember exactly when you know
00:36:19
when my five children were born exactly
00:36:21
how I felt when you know when I saw them
00:36:23
being born you know all their milestones
00:36:25
and all that sort of stuff and and I've
00:36:27
been really lucky enough to be present
00:36:29
in their lives yeah and this this book
00:36:31
of yours which I keep referencing will
00:36:33
take my presence which is like 30 years
00:36:34
old now you talk about um
00:36:36
um actually no there's a documentary I
00:36:38
saw as well there the one you did with
00:36:40
um JK called in a different League yeah
00:36:42
and then that you talk about how you
00:36:44
cried when you when you broke the news
00:36:45
to your black teammates that you were
00:36:46
leaving yeah and then you also cried um
00:36:49
at the birth of um both your kids yeah
00:36:51
created the birth of Jamie yeah and when
00:36:53
Boston came around you're like oh this
00:36:55
isn't my first rodeo yeah by the way
00:36:57
yeah you're emotional again but you you
00:36:58
sit back you said after that you're not
00:37:00
a particularly emotional person you've
00:37:02
got quite a thick skin has that changed
00:37:04
as you got older no no yeah yeah I find
00:37:08
I cry all the time yeah right and it's
00:37:10
good that way it's awesome mate like you
00:37:12
know like I'll be driving on the car and
00:37:14
I'll be like oh I'll think about my kids
00:37:16
or I think you know like I I'm about to
00:37:18
move to go and live in France you know
00:37:20
and the reason why we're going to live
00:37:21
in France is because I married a French
00:37:23
woman and
00:37:24
um and you know I want my two children
00:37:27
with her to speak their mother's tongue
00:37:30
right and and to be raised in you know a
00:37:32
different culture you know because
00:37:33
they've been raised here for a bit we'll
00:37:35
come back and forth but but anyways um
00:37:38
and you know so so I often find myself
00:37:41
going oh you know like you know I think
00:37:43
about my oldest son I'm like oh no
00:37:46
Tara roll down my face or I think about
00:37:48
my daughter and you know like but
00:37:50
they're not tears of sadness they're
00:37:51
tears of joy you know like if like you
00:37:53
realize how much
00:37:55
how tight you are with your family you
00:37:57
know like I don't I've got a lot of
00:37:59
people that I know I've got really good
00:38:02
friends but when it comes down to it the
00:38:05
most important thing is you is your
00:38:07
family so and and that's uh right and um
00:38:10
um you know like I just feel truly
00:38:14
blessed that I that I've got to you know
00:38:16
five wonderful children you know two two
00:38:19
adult children have just been an
00:38:21
absolute privilege you know um I I can't
00:38:25
I can't talk hardly enough about how
00:38:27
lucky I am with with how this turned out
00:38:29
you know so but that all comes down to
00:38:31
Dom it all comes down to being prison
00:38:34
and spending time with your kids yeah
00:38:36
you've got to do the work you've got to
00:38:38
do the work man you have to do the work
00:38:40
and the reward is amazing you know like
00:38:43
um you know my two youngest now like for
00:38:46
me being able to spend time with them
00:38:47
you know like a lot of people don't get
00:38:50
the opportunity to do what I'm doing you
00:38:52
know because you know most of us are
00:38:54
working nine to five or nine to ten or
00:38:56
you know two parents are working we get
00:38:58
home we're tired we're the last thing we
00:39:00
want to do is like go and read a book or
00:39:02
engage with their kids you know we just
00:39:03
want a bit of time for ourselves so I
00:39:05
completely get that right but so I feel
00:39:07
like I'm really lucky that I've you know
00:39:10
I I can do all those things my kids I
00:39:12
get to Bath and I get to hang out with
00:39:13
them I get so you know and I get down on
00:39:15
their level you know but it came a time
00:39:18
for a little bit over you know I started
00:39:21
enjoying myself a little bit too much
00:39:22
and partying and you know like around I
00:39:25
just went with us like after you after
00:39:27
your first marriage yeah after yeah
00:39:29
after after 40 uh you know like you know
00:39:31
it's and I go through the party stage
00:39:33
you know
00:39:34
and um I can remember not so long ago
00:39:37
just thinking wow
00:39:40
I'm gonna stop this man you know like
00:39:42
this is just bollocks you know like
00:39:44
and and I did and the closer then I felt
00:39:49
this closeness and this bond with my
00:39:51
children just come back you know because
00:39:53
you're present again you know you're not
00:39:55
thinking about oh what am I going to do
00:39:56
this weekend or where am I going or I've
00:39:58
got to hang out and I don't know you
00:40:00
know they say your focus is then you
00:40:02
know and when your focus becomes in
00:40:04
which is as it should be then they you
00:40:07
can develop like beautiful human beings
00:40:10
you know and you can arm them with the
00:40:11
right stuff because schooling and all
00:40:14
that stuff I think we arm our kids with
00:40:15
the wrong [ __ ] we need to arm our
00:40:17
children with you know
00:40:18
it's a bloody tough out there man like
00:40:21
the mental health side of things you
00:40:23
know competing with people all that sort
00:40:24
of stuff we've got to give them
00:40:26
different tools to work out how they get
00:40:28
ahead in life and it's not by you know
00:40:31
you don't get ahead of Life by having
00:40:32
more money than anybody else you've just
00:40:34
got to be balanced loved nurtured you
00:40:36
know like that's the way to go I reckon
00:40:38
because then everything just balances
00:40:40
itself out you're like money gives you
00:40:42
money money gives you a little bit of
00:40:45
freedom in there but it's you know and
00:40:47
then by the other token you know poor
00:40:48
people yes I I you go to India this is
00:40:51
real cool I went to India and these
00:40:53
little kids come out of these
00:40:55
horvels and they got big smiles on their
00:40:58
faces right and I was like wow you live
00:41:00
in an absolute [ __ ] like I mean a
00:41:03
[ __ ] right like you just wouldn't go
00:41:06
there and they are happy as Larry to see
00:41:09
you you know they just I don't know any
00:41:11
better you know like and we're in New
00:41:13
Zealand we're all like oh that life's
00:41:15
tough it's like we don't know how lucky
00:41:17
we are yeah you know there's a saying I
00:41:19
really like the um comparison is the
00:41:21
theft of Joy which is so true it's like
00:41:23
yeah yeah 100 it's Envy right it's Envy
00:41:26
so when you like and that's that's with
00:41:28
all the Social Media stuff and they say
00:41:30
oh like you know when you get on
00:41:31
Instagram you see all these people with
00:41:32
all these flash lives and that it's a
00:41:34
load of [ __ ] people are putting up
00:41:36
on this and I'm there hey what's you got
00:41:40
to remember is this I don't care if
00:41:42
you've got a trillion dollars you've
00:41:43
still got the same problems we've all
00:41:45
got right you all still want to be loved
00:41:47
you still want to be needy you still
00:41:48
want to be cared for you still want to
00:41:50
be respected right just because you've
00:41:52
got to let doesn't necessarily mean you
00:41:53
have those things right so you know when
00:41:55
people putting up all these flash
00:41:56
pictures and these stories on them and
00:41:58
feed you I'm here and I'm there and I
00:41:59
doubt it uh hey guess what they're still
00:42:02
in the background they've still got all
00:42:03
the same issues you've got you know so
00:42:05
it's just distort stuff it's funny I had
00:42:08
your own mate uh John Kerwin said John
00:42:10
Kerwin on the on the podcast and he's
00:42:11
that's his big drive at the moment like
00:42:13
getting uh like resilience training and
00:42:15
Mental Health Training and primary
00:42:16
schools yeah so um kids with these tools
00:42:18
yeah but the right stuff you know like
00:42:20
it doesn't matter what people think
00:42:22
about you because it doesn't as long as
00:42:25
you uh respectful as long as you care as
00:42:28
long as you are holding yourself in the
00:42:30
right frame and you're in the right
00:42:32
frame of mind then you're like what does
00:42:34
it matter what anybody else thinks it
00:42:36
doesn't you know and that's that's the
00:42:37
thing where all our kids are like you
00:42:39
know ah I I want to be friends with him
00:42:42
or he is just like just get on with your
00:42:45
life you know yeah but yeah I think
00:42:47
you've got to be nice to people it's
00:42:48
like when I was growing up there was a
00:42:50
saying that my parents are still with me
00:42:52
um sticks and stones may broken
00:42:55
but the names the names
00:42:58
do hurt you right that's the thing names
00:43:01
they do hurt you I'd rather get a punch
00:43:03
in the head when somebody say yeah
00:43:06
but it's very true you know all those um
00:43:08
those idioms or whatever you call them
00:43:10
they're all you know they're true to a
00:43:12
certain extent but names do hurt you
00:43:15
that's why like social media is so
00:43:16
powerful so when you read something or
00:43:19
you hear something especially if you
00:43:20
read something you know it sticks with
00:43:22
you right so be careful what you say be
00:43:25
careful what you say to people think
00:43:27
about how it would affect you if that
00:43:29
was said to you you know like and I I'm
00:43:31
no I'm No Angel I've said some nasty
00:43:34
things I've done some nasty things yeah
00:43:36
but there's that saying um if you've got
00:43:38
nothing nice to say don't say it but I I
00:43:40
had a very successful radio career
00:43:43
you've been a a sports um yeah a sports
00:43:46
pundit or whatever it's called you have
00:43:48
to say unkind things yeah yeah yeah well
00:43:50
I think you need to be you know you've
00:43:51
got to speak your truth right but this
00:43:53
time like you know there's times I wish
00:43:56
that even though what I see I I don't
00:43:58
think I've delivered I've never
00:43:59
deliberately seen anything that's untrue
00:44:01
or that I haven't believed you know I
00:44:03
you know I would never like throw
00:44:05
anybody under the bus with a load of
00:44:08
[ __ ] a lot lots of people do that
00:44:09
you know which is disgraceful but you
00:44:12
know even though it is what I believe I
00:44:14
think sometimes you don't need to say it
00:44:16
if it's if it's going to hurt somebody
00:44:18
you know then what's the point of saying
00:44:21
it do you need to say it no like you
00:44:24
know I think in that book I said you
00:44:25
know like
00:44:26
you know I I love Louie you know and but
00:44:29
he wasn't the best coach that I'd had
00:44:31
you know and I and he called himself the
00:44:33
master coach and then in the book I said
00:44:35
you know he's not the master case
00:44:36
although he was a master coach yeah yeah
00:44:39
he was in his particular way he was a
00:44:41
master at doing what he did but you know
00:44:43
the things that I see that I just I wish
00:44:45
I could take it back and go you know
00:44:47
what yeah okay that it's probably true
00:44:50
but I didn't need to say that yeah you
00:44:52
know do you um what's your what's your
00:44:55
self-talk like these days like uh you
00:44:57
know are you quite kind to yourself
00:45:15
what's the point like what's the point
00:45:18
of projecting yourself into the future
00:45:19
you know the future may never come you
00:45:21
know like and that's the other thing you
00:45:22
know we worry about all this [ __ ] oh
00:45:24
this won't even this won't even this way
00:45:26
it might happen you know like we like
00:45:29
these are the things I'm talking about
00:45:30
arming your kids with you know like
00:45:32
don't worry about all the stuff that's
00:45:34
in the future and certainly don't worry
00:45:35
about the stuff that's happened in the
00:45:37
past the only thing that matters is
00:45:39
right here and now because that's the
00:45:40
only thing you can control right so
00:45:42
that's the sort of stuff that I you know
00:45:44
that I really get into it's like and
00:45:46
when you when you ground yourself and
00:45:47
you stay present
00:45:49
right everything just seems to it gets
00:45:52
easier and things get lighter and you
00:45:54
don't take yourself so seriously your
00:45:55
ego doesn't come into play as much and
00:45:57
it's just it's just easy you know like
00:45:59
it's just it's a much it's a much better
00:46:02
place to be in fact it seems like you're
00:46:03
in a good place should I just look on
00:46:05
the clock we've been going for 49
00:46:06
minutes and we haven't even touched upon
00:46:08
the the second part of your career which
00:46:10
is the the Epic TV career
00:46:12
um what time do you have to be out of
00:46:14
here no no we keep going we've got a
00:46:16
school pickup right yeah yeah okay yeah
00:46:18
well I mean the TV stuff we'll get into
00:46:21
this but it's like um what you and Mark
00:46:23
Ellis did is sort of like what a Hamish
00:46:25
and Andy do now what John and Ben do and
00:46:28
except those Hamish Nanny broadcasters
00:46:30
John on being broadcasters you guys epic
00:46:33
sporting Legends before that so that
00:46:35
that needs to be talked about first of
00:46:37
all um like what's your relationship
00:46:39
like now with with your ex Sally uh
00:46:40
bring that up because um there's some
00:46:42
really cute stuff in the book you
00:46:43
actually bumped into Yesterday Pharaoh
00:46:45
fresh which is a supermarket around the
00:46:47
corner yeah no Sally says I've
00:46:49
no she was silly you know like she's the
00:46:52
mother of my two you know two honest
00:46:54
children and it appeared in our lives we
00:46:56
were together and now we're not you know
00:46:58
so no the amicable now was it was it
00:47:00
rough for a while I was it's always
00:47:02
rough when somebody leaves somebody yeah
00:47:05
like it's not easy you know it's it's
00:47:07
you know breakups aren't easy especially
00:47:09
with the kids involved and you know and
00:47:11
then other people get involved so yeah
00:47:13
it wasn't easy but um but you know we're
00:47:16
well through that now and she's got her
00:47:18
life and I've got my life and you know
00:47:20
she's been a great mum to all her
00:47:22
children and you know she's just getting
00:47:23
on with what she's doing some cute cute
00:47:25
stuff in the book so she talks about
00:47:27
when you first met I was at some bar in
00:47:29
Parnell she said you you had your shirt
00:47:31
unbuttoned all the way down to your
00:47:33
belly button oh she was lying I heard
00:47:35
excision three buttons three buttons
00:47:37
down probably
00:47:39
probably definitely a couple but it was
00:47:43
funny though I had no time I had zero
00:47:45
confidence
00:47:46
um you know even though I was an athlete
00:47:48
and all that stuff I just had no zero
00:47:51
confidence well it seems like maybe you
00:47:53
just put on a really good mask or a
00:47:55
really good front because the way she
00:47:57
tells it she was with some guy and
00:47:58
you're like ditch him come with us
00:48:00
seemed like a man with no confidence you
00:48:02
know I I think that I think I do
00:48:05
remember that but I'm pretty sure I
00:48:07
would have been full of piss yeah
00:48:10
that's just a Dutch Carriage I guess but
00:48:13
um and then um she talks about her or
00:48:15
maybe you talk about this well on your
00:48:17
on your first proper date like she
00:48:19
doesn't even speak a word no no she did
00:48:21
she she was very shy yeah she was very
00:48:23
very shy it was hard to you know take
00:48:26
your break through it for sad yeah and
00:48:28
and um and then you talk about flying
00:48:32
like flying backwards and forwards from
00:48:33
Australia like some days some days you'd
00:48:35
wake up in New Zealand fly over to
00:48:37
Australia for a training and then come
00:48:38
back yeah yeah yeah that's Bonkers yeah
00:48:41
I I didn't do that often but that is
00:48:44
that is a man that's in love oh I Love's
00:48:46
a funny thing oh yeah you don't you know
00:48:48
you're quite a romantic guy I'd like I'd
00:48:51
like to think I am although my wife
00:48:52
Chloe is so she seems you came up with
00:48:55
the French one she's my friend how did
00:48:57
you guys meet we met and um we met in we
00:49:00
met in New Zealand yeah I I had a broken
00:49:03
heart at the time I you know I was
00:49:04
riding through the um through the
00:49:06
viaduct on what BMX shirtless no I don't
00:49:09
think it was about 5 30 or 6 o'clock you
00:49:13
know I was on a Friday night I was
00:49:14
Friday through I was just going past
00:49:16
year I was like Scouting Around you know
00:49:18
as you do and um I saw these two girls
00:49:20
walking towards me and and I saw I saw
00:49:24
one was blonde and one was dark here
00:49:36
[Laughter]
00:49:39
she was like I was like oh g'day and I I
00:49:43
just I pretty much just followed around
00:49:44
all night you know like it was
00:49:46
embarrassing and um and her mate came up
00:49:49
to me right at the end of the night and
00:49:51
she said look Matthew I know who you are
00:49:54
but Chloe's got no clue and she's not
00:49:56
interested and I was like oh listen
00:49:59
uh-huh well you're pulling out all the
00:50:01
stuff like this super super challenge
00:50:03
yeah I was falling around I was falling
00:50:04
around I'm riding around on a BMX you
00:50:06
know but I'm an old dude and she said
00:50:07
that's right the first thing she said to
00:50:09
me she goes I haven't how come you're
00:50:11
riding your son's bike
00:50:14
because you know she was only 24 and I
00:50:17
would have been close to I think 40 at
00:50:19
the time and um she uh anyway her friend
00:50:23
said you know she's not interested and I
00:50:25
said oh look she she hasn't seen me
00:50:26
dance yet and so I went up to her and I
00:50:30
said I said I look Chloe I said look I'm
00:50:32
going to leave you alone it was about
00:50:33
three o'clock in the morning I can't
00:50:34
remember what club was in Fort Wayne I
00:50:37
said but can can I just let's just have
00:50:39
a little dance and we're on the Dance
00:50:41
Floor I said look just give me your
00:50:42
number and I'll leave you alone
00:50:43
and she gave me a number the next star I
00:50:46
rang it
00:50:47
and I thought oh she would have thought
00:50:48
about it and you know like she sort of
00:50:50
found out who I am and she said I'll be
00:50:52
sweet I shouldn't I'll be able to go on
00:50:54
a on a date with her because I want to
00:50:56
take her out for dinner and I rang her
00:50:58
and she and she was just cold like it
00:51:00
was like I was like oh hey hey it's me
00:51:03
blah blah blah and she just literally
00:51:05
asked me and then I I got off the phone
00:51:08
I was like oh that didn't go too well
00:51:09
and then she sent me a tea she said hey
00:51:10
Matthew it's complete it was nice
00:51:12
meeting you last night but I'm
00:51:13
understood you know just leave me alone
00:51:15
and I was like oh [ __ ] so that really
00:51:17
just brought me back a bit for like
00:51:19
three or four weeks anyway I didn't run
00:51:20
into her again for about four years I
00:51:23
was on a beach and um over at uh in
00:51:26
takapuna and I saw this girl I was like
00:51:28
oh my God who's that you didn't
00:51:30
recognize it I didn't recognize
00:51:32
who's that you know and and she was with
00:51:35
a bunch of friends of mine so I sort of
00:51:37
see me sort of see tomorrow hey look you
00:51:39
know like I'll go on ESP QR tonight you
00:51:41
want to come along you know blah blah
00:51:42
blah thinking that you know she might
00:51:43
hear him I come along you know because
00:51:45
she was sort of looking at me through
00:51:46
her glasses and I could see her looking
00:51:48
at me and I was looking at her anyway so
00:51:51
the penny dropped for him no it was the
00:51:53
penny drop for her but not for me yeah
00:51:54
right so so my mate my mate rang me as I
00:51:59
was hitting home he goes oh mate you
00:52:01
didn't tell me you knew Chloe I said
00:52:03
what what are you talking about
00:52:05
she reckons you'd try to you asked her
00:52:07
out a few years ago I said
00:52:09
this girl in my life and I completely
00:52:11
forgotten about it but anyway so I ran
00:52:13
into it at the um she did turn up to
00:52:16
spqr and I and I said hey I've got a
00:52:19
bone to pick with you you know blah blah
00:52:21
blah he said oh you don't remember
00:52:23
she told me so I was like oh you're the
00:52:25
girl and then from there that that was
00:52:27
it so we just we spent about three four
00:52:30
months together and then she went off to
00:52:31
Dubai and a long distance relationship
00:52:33
and then we just decided [ __ ] you know
00:52:35
like she tried to forget me I try to
00:52:37
forget her
00:52:39
just didn't happen and now she's trying
00:52:41
to forgive me again she's she's shot off
00:52:43
to France she's been there for six weeks
00:52:44
and now I'm gonna chase her again over
00:52:46
there so yeah timing's a funny thing
00:52:50
why was she Frosty on your first time
00:52:52
yes she was and that's right I'm sorry
00:52:55
that's right so so I I call her and
00:52:58
she's sitting in the car with her with
00:53:00
her boyfriend oh [ __ ] so my phone my my
00:53:04
name comes through on her phone and he's
00:53:05
like so why is Matthew Rich calling and
00:53:08
she's like oh I don't know like you know
00:53:11
we hadn't done anything or anything like
00:53:12
that but just a fact and so she why are
00:53:14
you giving your number she was she
00:53:17
actually got engaged to that guy and
00:53:18
went over to Cairns and was about to
00:53:20
marry him and then just went nah I'm I'm
00:53:23
not going to do it and she came back to
00:53:24
New Zealand and I was in New Zealand and
00:53:26
that's when we met at the beach yeah so
00:53:28
it was meant to be amazing amazing
00:53:30
you've got five kids so you got two two
00:53:33
one with Kelly one with Carly London
00:53:35
who's who is a freaky he's a freakiest
00:53:38
soccer but he's gonna be
00:53:39
he is he's a real talent how old is he
00:53:42
and where do they live yeah he's 11. so
00:53:44
they live
00:53:46
um London lives with with me and and
00:53:49
Carly but but he'd be spending more time
00:53:51
with Carly now obviously but but he'll
00:53:53
be coming up to Europe and Christmas and
00:53:54
that sort of thing but they live in
00:53:56
mangere Bridge he's a real good soccer
00:53:58
player and
00:53:59
um yeah I think he I think he could go
00:54:01
places actually let's see what happens
00:54:03
here but um yeah and then obviously uh
00:54:06
with with my wife Chloe we've got Kenzo
00:54:09
who's nearly five and Lolo who's nearly
00:54:12
three is it quite nice having these sort
00:54:14
of three the three chapters of your life
00:54:16
yeah it is actually like um I tell you
00:54:19
what having two children really close
00:54:20
together like uh Kenzo and Lola are two
00:54:22
years apart and that's been a real
00:54:24
eye-opener for us it's actually
00:54:26
I don't know how people do it it's quite
00:54:28
hard like I don't know how normal when I
00:54:30
say normal people people have to work
00:54:32
every day mum and dad have to work every
00:54:34
day and raise their kids especially
00:54:36
young children like that I don't know
00:54:38
how they do it like because like
00:54:40
I'm a full-time dad you know we're lucky
00:54:43
enough to be able to spend time with our
00:54:44
kids and it is hard work yeah you know
00:54:47
like it is full on you know like you you
00:54:49
don't get any time for yourself until
00:54:51
they go to bed you know like and Chloe's
00:54:53
over there now you know they're not in
00:54:55
daycare they're not in school yet and
00:54:56
you know so she said sort of six weeks
00:54:59
and she's beside herself you know like
00:55:01
it's it's it's mentally challenging you
00:55:03
know because they're just so demonic
00:55:05
they're amazing but holy holy smokes
00:55:08
like it's hard work do you think um yeah
00:55:12
because of the the age and the stage and
00:55:14
the place you're in your life you like
00:55:15
you're a bit of dead now with this yeah
00:55:17
yeah yeah yeah yeah well because when I
00:55:19
had uh Jamie in Boston I was focused on
00:55:23
my Sport and all that sort of stuff it
00:55:24
was cool because I I I wasn't working in
00:55:27
nine to five so and I love the baby
00:55:29
stage and all that sort of stuff but but
00:55:31
I was still sort of more focused on
00:55:33
myself and you know trying to be the
00:55:35
best best athlete I could be and trying
00:55:37
to get ahead in life and you know make
00:55:39
money buy a house you know just do all
00:55:41
those things all right let's um get into
00:55:43
this TV stuff correct me if I get this
00:55:45
wrong but Julie Christie Dame Julie
00:55:46
Christie so she gets you to host the the
00:55:49
game show the chair is that how it
00:55:51
starts how your TV thinks it was a TV
00:55:55
show John Macon Road
00:55:57
heaps of shows I know I think we started
00:56:02
we Mecca and I got together on it was
00:56:05
Julie's idea but it was ancient New
00:56:07
Zealand time of your life I remember
00:56:08
that with um
00:56:11
and they hosted the show but we had a
00:56:13
segment inside the show right and and I
00:56:16
can't remember but anyway yeah we had a
00:56:18
segment back and I had a segment inside
00:56:19
the show and it just just sort of
00:56:21
everybody liked it and it just took off
00:56:23
and then how are you two friends did you
00:56:25
play together in the Warriors did you
00:56:27
talk yeah yeah we meet each other at the
00:56:28
Warriors so I don't know why Julie
00:56:31
decided that Mike and I should get
00:56:33
together I don't know how it happened
00:56:34
and she just said look you know do you
00:56:36
guys want to do a TV show and I we you
00:56:38
know we went right okay and then from
00:56:41
that we got the fresh up and the deep in
00:56:42
ads and then from that it just ballooned
00:56:45
into we'll show you know game two halves
00:56:47
going on with it and we did game three
00:56:49
hours for 10 years and then and then we
00:56:51
we sort of did our own spin-off we yeah
00:56:53
the rocky road series the rocky roads
00:56:55
which are awesome and then you know in
00:56:57
between there the I did the chair and
00:56:59
which yeah so then Mcenroe got there so
00:57:02
the BBC like I nearly got that show I
00:57:05
nearly ended up doing it in the BBC you
00:57:08
know TV stuff was
00:57:10
it was really interesting but it's like
00:57:11
I said at the start you know like you
00:57:13
you give yourself a character and you
00:57:16
know everybody loved macca you know
00:57:18
they're likable Rogues yeah he's the
00:57:20
likable Rogue you know and then there's
00:57:21
a [ __ ] you know like the brooding you
00:57:23
know so that that was that was uh that
00:57:25
was the role that we both took you know
00:57:27
and that was real cool you know so so it
00:57:29
actually worked really well you know and
00:57:31
and I used to send myself up all the
00:57:34
time and you know like and we were
00:57:36
really competitive as well you know we
00:57:37
were trying to beat each other and that
00:57:39
sort of stuff and we just had amazing
00:57:41
chemistry you know but we got on like a
00:57:43
house on fire we both
00:57:45
both um you know enjoyed each other's
00:57:48
company we had the best you know we were
00:57:50
super lucky to achieve what we did in
00:57:52
television and you know like
00:57:54
you know I want to I think back and we
00:57:56
made shitloads of money like it was
00:57:59
ridiculous amount of money we were
00:58:00
getting paid to do what we were doing to
00:58:02
have a bit of fun you know like
00:58:04
um it was just it was it was real cool I
00:58:06
I felt really privileged to to create
00:58:09
something like that with with a really
00:58:11
good dude and and Julie Christie was
00:58:13
amazing you know I like her foresight
00:58:15
and and Daryl McEwan he was involved in
00:58:17
all that stuff he he was he was a bit of
00:58:19
a genius as well so you know we had
00:58:21
really good um people that were looking
00:58:22
after us but we just had their chemistry
00:58:25
you know and and um and people seem to
00:58:27
like it well the fact it went for so
00:58:29
long I think has uh proof of that right
00:58:31
yeah it was funny and then tvnz decided
00:58:33
that they were like it was it was still
00:58:36
raiding pretty well but I think there
00:58:38
was a change at tvnz and
00:58:41
um the guy came in either or the big
00:58:43
boss said I look you know if you're
00:58:45
going to do it again you have to take a
00:58:46
pay cut and me and Mecca were like what
00:58:48
right no so we just bend it and then we
00:58:52
we pretty much just bend everything
00:58:54
right and so when that finished oh I
00:58:57
just hear we just decided oh
00:58:59
you know we'd had a good run and that
00:59:01
was pretty much it you know yeah were
00:59:04
you guys quite quite close because I was
00:59:05
sort of found with radio Partnerships I
00:59:07
think yeah you spend so much time with
00:59:08
each other you can be good friends but
00:59:10
not definitely 100 yeah yeah we would
00:59:13
definitely like mac and I have like a
00:59:15
good mates do we see each other all the
00:59:17
time absolutely not I can't remember the
00:59:19
last time I've seen Mark you know like
00:59:20
but he leads uh you know he's an
00:59:23
international jet Setter and he leads a
00:59:24
life and and so do I so
00:59:27
um but yeah we we were tight as when we
00:59:31
were together but we led a completely
00:59:33
different life away from you know from
00:59:35
our television stuff when he when he
00:59:37
started his Juice company he wasn't like
00:59:39
oh Matthew do you want to you want to
00:59:40
buy into this um
00:59:46
he did very well you know and and he
00:59:48
deserved it so yeah you know he worked
00:59:50
hard and he copped a lot of shirt and
00:59:52
you know but you know Oh you mean the um
00:59:55
the court thing with the yeah selling
00:59:58
some pills yeah
01:00:04
that happened when we were we were
01:00:06
overseas we're in the UK right so he was
01:00:08
just Charlie's was just launching or was
01:00:11
just going public and we were in the UK
01:00:13
filming for
01:00:15
um for Rocky Road and he got this phone
01:00:18
call Julie Ray me and she goes Matthew I
01:00:21
can't believe it's not you I'm like
01:00:24
she goes but I need to speak to Mark and
01:00:27
I'm like oh okay and I can remember
01:00:30
watching him and he was just like it
01:00:32
just floored him right and that there
01:00:33
was a thing about Macaro like I'd love
01:00:36
him to death man and I'd do anything for
01:00:38
him and I always felt like like I just
01:00:40
felt like you know he was always a
01:00:41
happy-go-lucky really um but he was
01:00:44
actually a very serious person you know
01:00:46
like he he wasn't as happy-go-lucky as
01:00:48
he seemed you know like yeah he had a
01:00:50
deep thinking side oh he was a very deep
01:00:52
thinker you know and and and you know
01:00:55
like I he he he thought long and hard
01:00:58
about things and you know like you know
01:01:01
like to the point where he would get
01:01:02
down on himself you know you could you
01:01:05
could see that sort of stuff but he will
01:01:07
betray that he was a happy-go-lucky dude
01:01:09
right and there you go that's the thing
01:01:11
you know like so you know like just
01:01:13
because you see somebody as that it
01:01:15
doesn't necessarily mean that that's
01:01:16
their life you know everyone's got a
01:01:19
mask to some degree yeah 100 100 and you
01:01:22
know like that's what I see into at the
01:01:25
start of the show you know you have to
01:01:26
wear a cloak especially if you're a
01:01:27
public figure because if you don't mate
01:01:30
you let all these people in you just get
01:01:31
burned yeah that was a rough time for
01:01:33
him I remember his um little uh Speech
01:01:35
outside uh Court after his appearance it
01:01:38
seems um particularly rutlets that sort
01:01:40
of thing never happens now it's like if
01:01:42
you turn up to a festival with a bunch
01:01:43
of pills yeah yeah you and your mates
01:01:45
the police are uninterested yeah yeah no
01:01:47
they're interested in the commentator
01:01:48
but they were they weren't interested in
01:01:49
America they were trying to get me and
01:01:51
obviously they were real fizzed about
01:01:53
getting me but I wasn't there right
01:01:55
because I were there trying to get you
01:01:57
on all right no no they were they were
01:01:59
hoping it was me because
01:02:01
they'd staked out and toddy got done too
01:02:04
it's already got done before during
01:02:06
cocaine for Lana cocroft right
01:02:09
and
01:02:12
um I was in the hotel in the foyer and
01:02:16
macro had been been and gone and seen
01:02:19
that obviously seen him on camera and
01:02:21
and Tony gone up and down until he came
01:02:23
down and goes oh mate old babe what'd
01:02:25
she go up and see him I was like ah no
01:02:26
can't be asked you know and um but they
01:02:30
they had me on camera in the foyer right
01:02:32
so they had all these people coming and
01:02:33
going coming and going coming and going
01:02:34
coming and going right so yeah someone
01:02:37
was watching over you that day yeah well
01:02:39
yeah like but yeah funny hey yeah that
01:02:42
was kind of funny it seems like there
01:02:44
was um a hedonistic time I I've had Mike
01:02:46
King on the podcast and he talked about
01:02:48
how much coke he was doing in the game
01:02:50
of two halves days oh yeah I see like I
01:02:53
I think we're all smashing the [ __ ] out
01:02:55
of it to something you know like we're
01:02:57
definitely like um yeah like we've all
01:03:00
lived a pretty vigorous life there's no
01:03:03
doubt about it you know but what I will
01:03:05
say is as you get older you cannot live
01:03:08
like that you know like just it makes
01:03:10
absolutely no sense you don't have the
01:03:12
time and you know what I I'll say this
01:03:15
about
01:03:15
um you know I I love having a drink and
01:03:18
having a bit of fun just like the next
01:03:20
person but the downside is just so much
01:03:23
worse than the upside yeah you know what
01:03:25
I mean like it's gonna have a big one
01:03:27
you've got to pick and choose and you've
01:03:28
got to pick and choose and then you know
01:03:30
like even then it's like oh now I'm just
01:03:32
like man I I just I just do not want to
01:03:34
feel down for two three days you know
01:03:36
like and croc or whatever and it's all
01:03:38
good fun but you know and you push
01:03:39
through and you're like four o'clock
01:03:41
five o'clock in the morning you're like
01:03:42
hey
01:03:54
together you know we do everything
01:03:55
together that's that's that's why we're
01:03:57
we're soul mates you know like yeah we
01:04:00
don't do anything not together right so
01:04:02
and and and she's a heathen and I was a
01:04:05
heathen you know this is how we work
01:04:07
what are your advice is now do you like
01:04:08
a bit of weed no I don't know I I
01:04:10
honestly I don't know I've I've pretty
01:04:13
much just kicked everything into touch
01:04:14
hey just because I really just don't
01:04:17
have the time it's not desire it see for
01:04:20
me I'm uh I'm an allen or all out right
01:04:24
so if I'm into something I'm all into it
01:04:26
right and so it's it becomes a lifestyle
01:04:28
and you know like
01:04:31
I I just don't have the time or the
01:04:33
inclination or all the wand I've been
01:04:35
there I've done it I've had my fund you
01:04:36
know like and I I've
01:04:38
smashed a living [ __ ] out of it right so
01:04:40
I just don't need to do it anymore you
01:04:42
know like it's not that I I I won't have
01:04:45
a drink with my mates or have some fun
01:04:47
with my mates or whatever but now I just
01:04:49
I just it's like hey there's a time and
01:04:52
a place and if if you know it's but it's
01:04:55
it's not every weekend or it's not every
01:04:56
week or it's not even you know like it's
01:04:58
just varieties of spice of life and
01:05:00
everything but the moderation oh it's
01:05:02
good that you you've got it under
01:05:03
control yeah because I talked to my king
01:05:05
about this I said oh when when did it
01:05:07
get to the point that it became like a
01:05:08
chore for you or boring and he was like
01:05:10
it never did yeah it never did yeah I
01:05:12
know you think about Coke every day no
01:05:14
it didn't for me either but it's just it
01:05:16
got to the point where I was like hey
01:05:17
you know like that this isn't really me
01:05:19
you know like I guess I'm better than
01:05:21
this you know you just go down you go
01:05:23
down a deep dark hole as well you know
01:05:25
like it becomes becomes habitual and
01:05:27
then you know then you just you lose
01:05:29
sight of the things that are important
01:05:31
okay you seem to have like no no chip on
01:05:33
your shoulder or anything these days so
01:05:34
you're quite Zen are you quite a thin
01:05:36
dude I don't have a chip on my shoulder
01:05:37
yeah I I about anything or anyone no I
01:05:40
like it there's just no point you know
01:05:43
like I just you know like I'll call a
01:05:45
spade a spade and I'll I'll call it how
01:05:47
I see it but like I say you know like we
01:05:50
watch Cars for a living my son and I and
01:05:52
we run quite successful businesses and
01:05:54
that sort of stuff you know we're not
01:05:55
just calling is but we do okay but you
01:05:58
know like I I I try and serve people you
01:06:01
know I I get a real joy out of doing
01:06:04
what I do you know I just I just find
01:06:06
Dominique that you know that if you're
01:06:08
if you're kind to people you get
01:06:10
kindness back it's taken me a long time
01:06:12
to work that out but you know like
01:06:14
you know like people have an opinion
01:06:16
about me and all that sort of stuff and
01:06:18
you know I can see if I walk into a
01:06:20
restaurant here or whatever you know
01:06:22
people look at you and you know you can
01:06:23
see some people raise their eyes or
01:06:25
whatever well I just let all that go you
01:06:27
know and I I just try and when I meet
01:06:31
people just try and let them see me for
01:06:33
who I am and I try and see them for who
01:06:35
they are and life just becomes a lot
01:06:38
more lighter if you're not telling
01:06:40
yourself so seriously you know like a
01:06:42
[ __ ] made us well you know what it's
01:06:43
like we're only here for a short time
01:06:45
yeah absolutely and then we're dust mate
01:06:47
you know like that's it like so why have
01:06:50
all the angst why carry around this ego
01:06:52
and all that sort of stuff like I just
01:06:53
reckon it's easier to be stay in the
01:06:56
prison
01:06:57
and do the things you want to do and
01:06:59
your um your mental health over the
01:07:01
years it's been it's been pretty good
01:07:03
like I've been really lucky right you
01:07:05
know like I you know like I'll have a
01:07:07
cry and all that sort of stuff but I I
01:07:08
like being emotional like if I'm an
01:07:10
emotional person like oh
01:07:13
there's part of it do you think that's
01:07:15
just a natural progression with your age
01:07:17
or is that come from having like a
01:07:18
European wife
01:07:19
oh you know how the Europeans are it's a
01:07:21
different it's a natural progression of
01:07:23
my age but my wife is fire is buggery
01:07:25
like me you know so
01:07:27
so we we you know but but you know as
01:07:30
you get older like you sort of like you
01:07:34
realize what works and what doesn't and
01:07:36
you know raising your voice and yelling
01:07:37
and screaming it
01:07:38
doesn't do anything other than just I I
01:07:41
tell you what I noticed when I raise my
01:07:42
voice my kids start raising their voices
01:07:44
and then when you're aware of that
01:07:46
you're like wow that's just I can't
01:07:47
communicate like that you know I like it
01:07:49
so I've just got to try and just you
01:07:51
know we get frustrated everybody does
01:07:53
you know says things that you don't mean
01:07:54
all that stuff but just and then if you
01:07:56
do something if if you if you say
01:07:58
something to you know that's
01:08:01
you know out of line or whatever just
01:08:03
say sorry it's simple like I I'm always
01:08:06
saying sorry when I when it's not even
01:08:08
my fault hey babe I'm sorry yeah it's
01:08:11
just [ __ ] said so and like just take
01:08:12
the heat out of the situation oh I'm
01:08:14
sorry man I didn't mean to do that you
01:08:16
know I'm sorry if you're upset you know
01:08:17
like as long as you're genuine that's
01:08:20
all you can that's and that's you know
01:08:21
when somebody says sorry that's it
01:08:23
there's nowhere else you can go from
01:08:24
there yeah so if the person you've said
01:08:26
sorry to still wants to carry a joke
01:08:28
we'll beat them sorry mate if that's on
01:08:30
there that's on them you know like and
01:08:32
if sorry is an easy word to say yeah it
01:08:34
actually is and then it just disarms the
01:08:36
whole situation if
01:08:39
the heart of the apology the harder it
01:08:41
is to say that oh yeah but like you
01:08:43
you've got to like you've got to own
01:08:44
your situation that's the thing you've
01:08:46
got to own it like it like if you've
01:08:48
realized you're wrong then don't dick
01:08:50
around with not apologizing yeah you
01:08:52
know like just get on the front foot and
01:08:54
say hey pick up the phone or go and see
01:08:56
and say hey look I'm really sorry that
01:08:58
wasn't me or yeah that wasn't I you know
01:09:00
that
01:09:01
I shouldn't have said that or whatever
01:09:03
you know you just got to own it yeah
01:09:05
you've got to be you've got to take
01:09:06
responsibility for your actions your
01:09:09
words and all that stuff and when you
01:09:10
own that stuff then you just mate you
01:09:13
can sit back and go hey look yep
01:09:16
shouldn't have done it but I've
01:09:17
apologized that's all I can do and
01:09:18
that's all you can do what are you going
01:09:20
to do what what's the best thing to do
01:09:21
well well now mate yeah no no no no it's
01:09:23
not good enough I'm sorry what else
01:09:25
would you like me to do do I have to
01:09:27
Nick myself or you know like at least at
01:09:29
that point it's like you've got your
01:09:30
your hands and yeah yeah yeah as long as
01:09:33
it's a genuine apology you know like
01:09:35
it's and and that's I just find that if
01:09:38
you can step up to the plate real
01:09:41
quickly and get that out of the way it's
01:09:44
so much easier that's a mess of um Navy
01:09:46
Seals thing it's one of their golden
01:09:47
rules it's like own as much of your [ __ ]
01:09:49
it's hard like if it's your
01:09:51
responsibility own it yeah if you if
01:09:54
it's not you and you you haven't made
01:09:55
that mistake or you know like it's
01:09:57
somebody else's fault then hey cool but
01:09:59
you know like all this conflict and all
01:10:01
this angst it's just we don't need to
01:10:04
have it most of the time it all comes
01:10:06
back to our ego it's all how everybody's
01:10:09
positioning themselves in it right so if
01:10:11
you can let go of you go and go what's
01:10:13
the matter because it doesn't yeah well
01:10:15
it's going to change the world no
01:10:16
nothing when um when did when did you I
01:10:19
mean you you had every ride in the world
01:10:20
to have have like a big ego like you're
01:10:22
very very good at sports very successful
01:10:25
very successful at TV when um when did
01:10:28
the how did you strip the year go back I
01:10:30
just sort of when I'd let when I left
01:10:33
Sally and I just started thinking about
01:10:36
you know what life's all about and you
01:10:37
know like
01:10:39
where am I what am I doing where am I
01:10:41
from what what's important to me and I
01:10:43
just started reading you know and I just
01:10:44
you know it sounds Eerie Fury and all
01:10:46
that sort of stuff but I just got into
01:10:48
you know reading about spirituality and
01:10:52
you know spirit and just you know and I
01:10:54
don't like to push that stuff on anybody
01:10:56
you know but that's just that's the road
01:10:58
that I that I took and that I I always
01:11:01
just you know I just come back to it
01:11:03
it's it's I guess it's like religion if
01:11:05
you're religious that's what you're into
01:11:07
but I I'm more into that stuff whereas
01:11:09
it's nobody pushed it on me I just I
01:11:12
just I sort of found my way to it and
01:11:14
just asking questions about you know why
01:11:16
am I here what age am I here for because
01:11:19
I'm not here to chase a little either
01:11:20
around I I'm not here to make money so
01:11:22
those were the questions that I was
01:11:24
asking to just you know
01:11:25
and I just found books and stuff on that
01:11:27
and in a way I went so but you know but
01:11:29
you slip back into your ways
01:11:32
but I I tell you what I'm challenging
01:11:34
everybody to to say this isn't true you
01:11:37
feel way better when you live in the
01:11:38
present when you don't project yourself
01:11:40
into the future you know you're thinking
01:11:42
about art you know it's okay to plan and
01:11:44
all that stuff and then stuff that's
01:11:46
happened in the past it's a past he is
01:11:49
you know okay own it say sorry whatever
01:11:51
blah blah blah but it's the past I can't
01:11:54
change it that's the future that might
01:11:56
never happen the only thing I can
01:11:57
control is here and now and when you
01:11:59
live there in the here and now and it's
01:12:00
real hard to do because our minds play
01:12:02
tricks on us yeah and we always you know
01:12:04
you know you'll be driving along you
01:12:06
know when you're driving along this is
01:12:07
what drive along you're drifting away
01:12:09
and you're thinking you're thinking then
01:12:10
you catch yourself and you go what am I
01:12:12
thinking about
01:12:13
oh I'm thinking about [ __ ] in the future
01:12:16
yeah or [ __ ] in the past yeah what the
01:12:18
wake up mate yeah you know I saw a
01:12:21
therapist a couple of years ago and she
01:12:22
was like when when your mind starts
01:12:24
wandering like that you need to when you
01:12:26
realize you're pulling yourself back in
01:12:27
ask yourself is this helpful yeah and if
01:12:29
it's not just [ __ ] better yeah hard
01:12:31
so it's it's like you've actually got to
01:12:33
watch yourself you know so you step
01:12:35
outside yourself and you just watch
01:12:37
yourself and you just watch it and you
01:12:39
look at your mind ticking over and you
01:12:40
go and when you do that you're like wow
01:12:42
it's it's actually real good even just
01:12:44
talking about it you can actually see it
01:12:46
you know so it's
01:12:48
that's the sort of thing that um you
01:12:50
know that that's that's what I I try and
01:12:52
live my life by now and and you know I
01:12:55
and I was very eager Cisco I was very
01:12:57
driven I was very aggressive I was very
01:12:59
like you know I'm gonna get there and
01:13:00
all that sort of stuff but that's
01:13:02
important but I think what the most
01:13:04
important thing is is to be a decent
01:13:06
person yeah I mean everything that
01:13:08
you've been through in your in your life
01:13:10
has taken you to um where you are today
01:13:12
and the person you are today but uh
01:13:13
would you change anything if you could
01:13:15
go back
01:13:19
[Laughter]
01:13:32
there'd be a few things I'd change maybe
01:13:35
maybe I don't know mate I don't know I I
01:13:37
would I would I would definitely be
01:13:39
definitely be a lot Kinder you know I
01:13:43
would definitely say to that young man
01:13:44
you don't need to be like that you don't
01:13:46
need to you know like because normally
01:13:48
most of the time when you react to stuff
01:13:50
it's because you've been injured right
01:13:52
so if you can if you can just forget
01:13:54
about that stuff forget about the eye
01:13:56
then you usually you're okay start
01:13:58
thinking more about how other people
01:14:00
feel and then just life becomes a lot
01:14:03
easier you know and then and you know
01:14:05
what when you actually give a [ __ ] about
01:14:06
how everybody else is going things
01:14:08
actually
01:14:09
started going really good for you
01:14:10
because people see you as something oh
01:14:13
wow
01:14:14
not that you want it to be like that but
01:14:16
it's just it's just it just sort of
01:14:17
manifests I hate those sort of words but
01:14:20
yeah no no it's it's true that's like
01:14:22
the um I think this is even a Biblical
01:14:24
thing you know you reap what you say
01:14:25
yeah it's like you know what is so corny
01:14:28
that's it's not corny but you reap what
01:14:30
you sow it's like if you put out
01:14:32
on this on that if you if you are an
01:14:36
angry person you're just going to
01:14:37
attract angry people if you're a loving
01:14:40
caring nurturing person that's what
01:14:41
you're going to attract and it's the
01:14:43
truth right so
01:14:44
yeah um I think it's funny if we were
01:14:47
specific we first of all we never would
01:14:49
have been sitting here 15 20 years ago
01:14:51
but if we if we were having this
01:14:52
conversation it would have been a very
01:14:53
different conversation way different
01:14:55
yeah 100 so like and but that's what I
01:14:58
mean Don when we talk about you know we
01:15:00
teach our kids the wrong stuff at school
01:15:02
this is so these are the sorts of
01:15:04
conversations we need to be having with
01:15:05
our children you know like
01:15:07
you know six educational that sort of
01:15:09
stuff yeah that's important but how do
01:15:11
you become a good person what's
01:15:13
important you know like it and I I just
01:15:15
I just don't think there's anything
01:15:17
we're not teaching their kids the right
01:15:19
things at school maths and English and
01:15:21
all that stuff is really important but
01:15:23
the holistic side of life we don't get
01:15:26
any of that stuff you know we like I had
01:15:29
to find it all on my own yeah I was 33
01:15:32
before I went oh what do you mean
01:15:33
there's a book on
01:15:34
stuff about what I've been thinking
01:15:37
about but I didn't nobody's really told
01:15:40
me about it other than religion and I
01:15:42
don't like religion because that's dogma
01:15:44
and a whole set of rules right yeah and
01:15:46
I'm not really into all these rules so
01:15:49
there you go we could talk for ages and
01:15:51
ages yeah no so what about low points in
01:15:53
your life you mentioned before like when
01:15:54
you were when you when you the very
01:15:55
first time you met um you're now wife
01:15:57
how are you nursing a broken heart yeah
01:15:59
is that oh yeah broken hearts are real
01:16:03
bad but yeah the low points have been
01:16:05
you know like I when I was 16 I ran from
01:16:08
a care but that's right this is this is
01:16:11
a thread that runs through your book
01:16:12
this lady this lady Pamela Hopkins was
01:16:14
the name of man I don't know how this
01:16:17
lady can live with a selfie like
01:16:19
seriously how the [ __ ] you can live with
01:16:21
yourself lady I I've forgiven her but
01:16:23
it's like it's it was disgusting what
01:16:25
she did to us well we we were wrong like
01:16:28
we ran from a kid without pain
01:16:31
you're a kid she we were 16 years old so
01:16:34
we got picked up from a from a an
01:16:36
address and how like she dropped us a
01:16:38
Green Lane we jumped down the camera and
01:16:39
sprinted you know she was done dust you
01:16:42
know the the cops came to my door and
01:16:44
like uh at four o'clock in the morning
01:16:48
and um
01:16:49
and said you know all the cost winners
01:16:52
my house in this one detective detective
01:16:54
Sergeant Street do you want to hear the
01:16:55
story yeah yeah I mean I've read it
01:16:57
recently but most people wouldn't of it
01:16:59
so he he the street guy took me into
01:17:02
into the lounge and he said oh so and I
01:17:04
said I sir I'm so sorry I ran from a cab
01:17:07
without paying we need to uh our mower
01:17:10
Lawns I'll pay her money back it was I
01:17:11
don't know how much it was it was 20
01:17:12
bucks we'll pay a hundred you know like
01:17:14
it was just like and he goes oh well
01:17:17
that's not what happened Matthew you
01:17:18
held a knife to her throat and you stole
01:17:21
60 off for it but an almost 16 year old
01:17:24
never been in trouble before you know
01:17:25
like I'm in I'm in my house my
01:17:28
grandfather's got one eye he's getting
01:17:29
out my grandmother's still in bed I said
01:17:31
dad just wait in that in the in the
01:17:33
dining room
01:17:34
anyway I said no that's not true anyway
01:17:37
so they go into my bedroom and I go into
01:17:39
they're looking for money or whatever
01:17:41
and they don't find anything and then we
01:17:42
go back into the dining room where my
01:17:44
dad is and I said oh Dad
01:17:46
look oh I I because they wanted me to go
01:17:49
down the police and said Dad they want
01:17:50
me to go down the police station because
01:17:51
they think that I've held a knife to a
01:17:53
lady straight and stole 60 off her and
01:17:56
the cop that said that to me this
01:17:57
detective [ __ ] shriek goes where'd
01:17:59
you get that information from son
01:18:01
and and I was like but isn't that what
01:18:04
you told me when we were because what
01:18:07
are you talking about
01:18:08
and I was like holy [ __ ] you know to
01:18:11
myself I'm like oh but I still didn't
01:18:13
really know what to think right so we go
01:18:15
down the police station
01:18:17
and um
01:18:18
you know we just go through all that
01:18:21
sort of rubbish you know bloody blah
01:18:23
blah blah they didn't find anything
01:18:24
there was no thing anyway this lady
01:18:27
she'd obviously said that we'd done this
01:18:28
a bit but cut a long story short there'd
01:18:31
been a spade of aggravated Robbies on
01:18:33
taxi drivers there and that police
01:18:34
hadn't been able to solve it right and
01:18:37
um the the co-op the taxi carpet they
01:18:40
were providing money for people that you
01:18:41
know had to take time offer so she had
01:18:43
to take time off work and she got a bit
01:18:44
of money and all the [ __ ] anyway we
01:18:46
go to trial the first trials are Hungary
01:18:49
and it's a high court so 12 10 people
01:18:51
said we were innocent two people said we
01:18:53
went the next trial we got thrown out
01:18:55
the third trial we got found guilty in
01:18:58
the summing up the judge is summing up
01:19:00
because our story didn't change from
01:19:01
minute one from the day we we got
01:19:04
arrested to the last last you know the
01:19:07
day we had our court case of the last
01:19:09
three call cases
01:19:10
her story changed all the [ __ ] time
01:19:12
one minute I was sitting behind her next
01:19:14
minute disco I was here the next minute
01:19:16
we'd done this this sort of how you like
01:19:17
her story was there were holes in her
01:19:20
story like you would not [ __ ] believe
01:19:22
right and um the judging is summing up
01:19:25
said now you may look at these two boys
01:19:28
and think that because their story
01:19:29
hasn't changed this I'm cutting to the
01:19:31
chase a little bit yeah yeah because his
01:19:33
story hasn't changed they've made up
01:19:35
this story and they've stuck to this
01:19:36
story
01:19:37
and sometimes when you're telling the
01:19:39
truth you know your story changes a
01:19:41
little bit no [ __ ] [ __ ] what the [ __ ]
01:19:44
no [ __ ] and what me and Robbie are
01:19:46
sitting here I'm going oh my God we're
01:19:48
[ __ ] and we were [ __ ] you know they
01:19:51
found us guilty blah blah blah and that
01:19:54
it wasn't just running from the cab this
01:19:57
was a charge of aggravated robbery yeah
01:19:59
it's the same as walking into a bank
01:20:01
with a gun and robbing you know a
01:20:03
gunpoint right so it came with a 14-year
01:20:05
jail sentence so we we sat down lawyers
01:20:08
because they always I'm only going to do
01:20:09
all that but anyway this lawyer that we
01:20:11
we got on board he was an old dude he
01:20:12
goes
01:20:13
he just found the official Information
01:20:15
Act got everything that was said
01:20:17
beforehand you know everything that she
01:20:19
had said anyway and the official
01:20:20
information it proved that she'd
01:20:22
withheld the police withheld evidence to
01:20:24
prove she was lying because she said
01:20:25
we'd run from a taxi before she was
01:20:27
positive it was us she said it was two
01:20:29
years earlier on this day to say
01:20:30
probably no I hadn't even met at that
01:20:32
stage I was going to Malibu and Grandma
01:20:33
blah blah blah but the police withheld
01:20:35
that evidence right so they were like no
01:20:37
no we don't need to put that in and um
01:20:39
anyway so we go down oh and then how we
01:20:42
got to challenge the the how we got a
01:20:45
appeal because we appeal descendants we
01:20:47
got we got convicted for aggravated
01:20:50
robbery and we got sentenced to 12
01:20:51
months periodic detention
01:20:53
so when the judge he was reading out
01:20:55
because you have to go and give all the
01:20:57
you know the
01:20:59
the reports the judge and people write
01:21:01
things down for you he how I could see
01:21:03
him looking at going [ __ ] I think I've
01:21:04
got this wrong because people like you
01:21:07
know we're getting all these things
01:21:08
ready and they're like this isn't these
01:21:10
guys blah blah blah anyway
01:21:12
we were allowed to appeal the Sinners
01:21:13
because his summing up was so biased so
01:21:16
when we went down to the appeals court
01:21:18
in Wellington
01:21:19
um you sit in front of three judges you
01:21:21
know a long story short it was thrown
01:21:23
out you know like because it was obvious
01:21:25
we hadn't [ __ ] done it and she was
01:21:27
lying and the police were promoting and
01:21:28
this detective Sergeant shriek prick
01:21:30
right so so about two years later a year
01:21:34
ago yeah maybe a year and a half I made
01:21:36
the old place and I was walking through
01:21:37
the gym at um Institute of sport
01:21:39
and I saw him and I froze you know like
01:21:42
I can remember and I just made the oil
01:21:44
basis and and I froze and he was like I
01:21:48
met you congratulations mate
01:21:51
no [ __ ] no [ __ ] and I was like
01:21:57
I I I I I couldn't even give any words
01:21:59
yellow when I saw my actually I shut my
01:22:02
pants you know because this guy he was
01:22:04
he tried to
01:22:07
my life would have been completely
01:22:10
different I imagine it and you know like
01:22:11
I still get people now they go oh yeah
01:22:14
you ran for me care without paying you
01:22:16
actually I hate sufficient yeah you ran
01:22:19
from a cab you [ __ ] yeah and you're
01:22:22
bloody attacked that Taxi Driver you
01:22:24
know it sounds just like you so what I
01:22:26
say to her
01:22:27
is how you can live and you know who she
01:22:30
was Jared McCracken's [ __ ] Auntie
01:22:34
oh what the hell
01:22:37
no [ __ ] no [ __ ] but so she I don't know
01:22:41
how that woman has lived her life and
01:22:44
being able to look herself in the mirror
01:22:46
when she got up for three trials and
01:22:48
just lied bald-faced just literally said
01:22:52
that something that absolutely didn't
01:22:54
happen happened yeah like what the [ __ ]
01:22:57
who does it yeah how do you sleep at
01:22:59
night who the hell does it and like and
01:23:01
you you'd think I'd have a chip on my
01:23:03
shoulder but I didn't
01:23:06
mean I think we wrecked over the coals I
01:23:10
played my first game for Auckland rugby
01:23:12
against um against Canterbury it was the
01:23:15
rambly shield um record-breaking
01:23:17
performance where I think the Memoir
01:23:19
Canterbury had won 26 anyway we were
01:23:21
going to break it was my first game and
01:23:23
there was a lull on the crowd and this
01:23:25
guy out enjoy it Bridge you'll be in
01:23:27
jail next year because I had like I was
01:23:30
going through the process we were going
01:23:32
for an appeal at you know the next year
01:23:34
so yeah so that's one thing I regret
01:23:36
running from a camera Alpine yeah 100
01:23:39
and like like it was absolutely no
01:23:42
excuse for doing what we did you know I
01:23:44
can remember I I can remember ringing my
01:23:46
mum and this is what I will it's it's
01:23:49
not my mum's fault but
01:23:51
you know like I always say to my
01:23:52
children I've always said to them hey
01:23:54
look I don't care where you are if
01:23:55
you're on the other side of the world if
01:23:56
you're in trouble you call me I will be
01:23:58
there if you lie to me I will kill you I
01:24:01
don't care if you've done something as
01:24:02
long as you tell me the truth yeah but
01:24:04
if you lie we're done do not lie but if
01:24:06
if I can deal with anything I can't deal
01:24:09
with lies if you need me anywhere I'm
01:24:11
going to be there anyway so I can
01:24:12
remember ringing my mum saying hey mum I
01:24:14
mean how can we
01:24:16
can you come and pick us up and she was
01:24:18
like she wasn't very happy about and
01:24:20
she's like no find your own way yeah he
01:24:22
has like 20ks or something yeah yeah
01:24:23
[ __ ] unbelievable do you think um being
01:24:26
an in and out of court for minor things
01:24:27
since the year through your life do you
01:24:29
think um that sort of gave you like a
01:24:31
bit of a maybe a chip on your shoulder
01:24:33
towards the police or authority
01:24:35
definitely didn't like the police yeah
01:24:37
you know like how can you trust them
01:24:39
after that I I couldn't you know like
01:24:40
and and that the whole bureaucracy of
01:24:44
the police and all that stuff like it
01:24:45
was it was disgusting how we were
01:24:47
treated and they knew that they they had
01:24:50
to know we were innocent you know like
01:24:51
they just had to like they'd seen all
01:24:54
the information you know that we hadn't
01:24:56
seen she said that we'd definitely done
01:24:58
it to her before that we'd stolen from
01:25:00
before that we held a night to it before
01:25:01
that we've done all that [ __ ] before
01:25:03
right like what that like you know and
01:25:05
now and they knew that probably no I'd
01:25:08
never met so she'd obviously got the
01:25:10
wrong guys you know so and none of that
01:25:13
[ __ ] had happened to her before anyway
01:25:14
she's full of [ __ ] she's just lying but
01:25:18
anyway and then it was funny I jumped
01:25:20
into a cab I remember I was about 20
01:25:22
years ago probably 25 years ago and I
01:25:24
jumped into a cabin was here
01:25:43
you know but you know when you see when
01:25:45
the when things like that happen you
01:25:47
know like when I've saw a detective
01:25:49
streak again like just I I can remember
01:25:51
just the fear and the you know it's like
01:25:54
seeing a ghost you know because it had
01:25:56
such an impact on my life you know like
01:25:59
we we were I wasn't my family were very
01:26:01
poor well not poor but we were we
01:26:03
certainly didn't have a lot of money and
01:26:06
um you know for my mum and my
01:26:08
grandparents and my uncle to find that
01:26:10
money to you know to to go through a
01:26:12
court case what a stressful thing to go
01:26:14
through oh yeah man and then still be
01:26:16
trying to get ahead in life you know
01:26:18
like a 16 so 16 to 19 you know and
01:26:20
everybody uh formative years and
01:26:22
everybody running around thinking you're
01:26:23
a aggravated robber I mean it's it's
01:26:25
terrible isn't it because there's
01:26:26
nothing you can do about you you know
01:26:28
you know your character and and yeah
01:26:30
your reputation is up to other people
01:26:31
there's nothing you can make nothing
01:26:33
absolutely nothing your life is and and
01:26:36
then you've got you know then oh it's
01:26:39
just real bad because Rob was an awk and
01:26:41
grammar boy and I was a dark boy and I'd
01:26:42
just gone to Auckland grandma that year
01:26:44
our lawyers were my lawyer was Gerard
01:26:48
Curry and he was the guy that defended
01:26:50
Rainbow Warrior agents and he was not
01:26:52
very good and Rob's lawyer was he was a
01:26:55
QC but he wasn't very good and Rob's
01:26:57
lawyers Me Softly spank and in Rob's
01:27:00
lawyer was was a guy that he thought
01:27:03
that I definitely done it because I was
01:27:05
dark and that Rob you know like e short
01:27:08
he didn't do it you know like just all
01:27:10
this sort of [ __ ] you know we're like
01:27:12
hey yeah no it's real bad and but you
01:27:16
know like it's funnier like my mate I
01:27:18
went that way he went that way
01:27:21
yeah what do you mean what did he oh he
01:27:23
he just he just went down a real dark
01:27:25
hole right yeah yeah so it's hard to I
01:27:29
suppose bounce back from something like
01:27:30
that isn't it that's a big that's a big
01:27:32
stressful traumatic thing to go through
01:27:34
yeah it shaped me that's for sure but it
01:27:36
definitely I had definitely not not a
01:27:39
chip on my shoulder but I I it'd be fair
01:27:41
to say that as far as I concerned the
01:27:44
police win you know we're my best
01:27:45
friends yeah oh 100 so and so what were
01:27:48
the other things you're in court for
01:27:49
because I remember there's a clip they
01:27:51
were shown on the news all the time of
01:27:52
you arriving at Gordon like oh that was
01:27:54
so that was for um that was for driving
01:27:57
outside
01:27:59
all restricted hours or something yeah
01:28:01
yeah
01:28:01
that was when Eric Eric Watson was the
01:28:04
side he decided to follow me around New
01:28:06
Zealand and follow you know put a pi on
01:28:08
me and [ __ ] we've talked a lot about
01:28:09
Karma mate and I deserve that you know
01:28:12
100 I deserve that and I tell you what
01:28:15
I'll tell you what this is this and this
01:28:17
is the truth the woman always chooses
01:28:19
always the woman
01:28:21
so this is um Eric Watson he was the
01:28:24
owner of the Warriors yeah worth a
01:28:25
couple hundred million married to Nikki
01:28:27
Watson his wife decided she wanted a
01:28:29
piece of me right right and um and she
01:28:31
just didn't stop yeah and like
01:28:33
admittedly I I should have gone hey and
01:28:36
I did too with Sally at the time no I
01:28:38
left Sally right right
01:28:40
um as soon as soon as that started I
01:28:42
left Sally but you know like I'll make
01:28:44
that that's you know what and for two
01:28:46
years done for two years three years I
01:28:47
lived a lie you know in my way you're
01:28:50
with somebody but but you're not being
01:28:53
honest about it yeah you know like so
01:28:55
so and I always used to say to Nikki at
01:28:57
the time I said you know this is going
01:28:58
to end how it started it's going to end
01:29:00
and lies because it started with
01:29:01
[ __ ] and yeah you know I like it the
01:29:04
more I tried to you know like I'd say to
01:29:07
it I was it was just so bad just like
01:29:09
just just sneaking around and oh she's
01:29:13
still married to Eric at the time no she
01:29:15
did she left the hurricane so you're
01:29:17
sneaking around why because of the like
01:29:18
Paparazzi and media yeah just and just
01:29:21
you know I didn't we didn't want to
01:29:22
embarrass here according like that you
01:29:24
know but just you know like there was a
01:29:26
whole build up whereas he didn't want to
01:29:29
hear the Eric
01:29:30
didn't want to believe that we were
01:29:32
together you know he wanted me to he
01:29:34
wanted to leave his wife and me to move
01:29:35
in with him you know we were real buddy
01:29:37
buddies but yeah yeah it was just like
01:29:39
mate you know I I remember saying to him
01:29:41
should I don't know how he got onto this
01:29:42
but I remember saying to I was like
01:29:45
hey Eric if if you leave Nikki I'm gonna
01:29:48
ask her out and um he was like he lost
01:29:51
it and I was like well
01:29:54
uh and you know I can remember saying to
01:29:57
him I don't want out of the Warriors
01:29:58
because I I had a so I own 25 of the
01:30:01
Warriors and he said why man I said look
01:30:03
because I just went out you know I just
01:30:04
want to do my own thing I was involved
01:30:06
you know I want to start my own
01:30:07
businesses and blah blah blah but I want
01:30:09
it out because you know I was with I was
01:30:11
with Nikki but he he didn't want to know
01:30:14
you know and and he didn't believe it
01:30:16
and then obviously once it all came out
01:30:18
he decided he was just going to make my
01:30:20
life a living hell and and fair enough
01:30:22
you know like fair enough I have no
01:30:24
problem with that but you you say fair
01:30:26
enough but then we talked about the
01:30:28
camera thing before so he he had an
01:30:30
interview and made your life a living
01:30:31
hell and then fast forward down the
01:30:32
track oh and Glenn
01:30:34
for him
01:30:36
I arguably did a better job making his
01:30:39
life out of the way he did to you yeah
01:30:40
you get you you certainly get what you
01:30:42
deserve you know like but but what I
01:30:44
will say that's it's very true like
01:30:47
you know like I should have I should
01:30:49
have been able to say nut I'm like going
01:30:52
down that track you know like there's no
01:30:54
way but that's why I say the woman
01:30:56
always chooses when a woman decides she
01:30:58
wants something it's real I like
01:30:59
especially like she was pretty hot she
01:31:02
was she wasn't yeah and it's the ego
01:31:04
thing we're talking about it's hard yeah
01:31:05
but I mean she just chased and chased
01:31:07
and chased and chased and chased and
01:31:09
chased it was like horrendous
01:31:11
and then like but I got my camera bro
01:31:13
because
01:31:14
um you know we were together and we
01:31:16
bought a house together and I'd move the
01:31:18
appearance on to build a house for
01:31:20
appearance on a place out of cracker
01:31:21
that we had
01:31:22
and um uh she started seeing this guy
01:31:25
Shelton wool right Oh Yeah from blind
01:31:27
spot yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah which was
01:31:29
all cool like I remember like as it was
01:31:33
just because we've been together for
01:31:34
three or four years and I can remember
01:31:35
saying to myself because I wasn't happy
01:31:37
with Nikki you know like it's we just
01:31:38
didn't gel but because I'd
01:31:41
I'd created so much you know torment
01:31:44
with what we did I was like I can't
01:31:47
leave her you know I can't leave you
01:31:49
know like this this is just ridiculous
01:31:51
you know making all the [ __ ] that I've
01:31:53
created to get this spot you're just
01:31:55
gonna have to suck this up Matthew you
01:31:57
know and I and I and I was sucking it up
01:31:59
all the time
01:32:00
she was fine she was running around
01:32:03
behind my back which which was fine but
01:32:05
it just you know when you decide to suck
01:32:07
it up and then that person ends up like
01:32:10
giving it to you so but you know what I
01:32:12
I can remember sitting there and I was
01:32:13
like you know what you deserve
01:32:15
everything you got you know you see
01:32:17
yourself you deserve that yeah like I
01:32:19
deserve it you know like I'm 100 so it
01:32:21
taught me it taught me some very very
01:32:23
good lessons there's no point in
01:32:25
bullshitting lying to speak deceptive
01:32:28
you just got a front up you know like
01:32:31
and it's as hard as it is you know like
01:32:33
we all try to run around trying to
01:32:35
protect people and protect you know like
01:32:37
because we don't want to hurt people but
01:32:38
you know what the worse you just gotta
01:32:41
front up and say hey I'm really sorry I
01:32:44
didn't mean for this to happen but it's
01:32:45
happened you know and and this is where
01:32:48
we're at this is the truth and that's uh
01:32:50
how how long how many years did it take
01:32:53
you to to figure this all out I'm just
01:32:55
thinking this conversation could Fast
01:32:57
Track that fast track that process for a
01:32:59
lot of other oh
01:33:00
yeah yeah for a lot of other people yeah
01:33:02
yeah hey look look the worst thing you
01:33:05
can do in relationship is like this is
01:33:07
how I live my life now right this is how
01:33:09
I live my life now it's like if there's
01:33:12
anything that I'm keeping from my
01:33:13
partner if I can't tell her something
01:33:16
then if I'm lying about something then
01:33:19
it's it's the beginning of the end you
01:33:22
know what I mean as soon as there's a
01:33:24
level of mistrust or you're you're
01:33:26
starting to tell lies in your
01:33:27
relationship then you may as well get
01:33:30
out because it's it's it's over you know
01:33:33
like that's when it just starts going
01:33:34
downhill as soon as you can't if you
01:33:36
can't leave your phone
01:33:38
yeah if you can't leave your keys if
01:33:40
somebody can't call you if you can't
01:33:42
like if you if you if you've got
01:33:43
something to hide you're in the wrong
01:33:45
relationship did you know
01:33:47
that's just my experience like if you're
01:33:51
not if you're doing something that you
01:33:53
shouldn't be doing then you need to ask
01:33:54
yourself the question am I supposed to
01:33:55
be with this person
01:33:57
yeah absolutely do you know what I mean
01:33:59
yeah absolutely what's the point of
01:34:01
[ __ ] what's the point like what's
01:34:02
the point of lying to somebody that's
01:34:04
supposed to be you're supposed to be you
01:34:06
know if she's your wife or your husband
01:34:08
or whatever but you're lying keeping
01:34:10
things from what's the point of that
01:34:11
right why are you doing that yeah you're
01:34:13
with the wrong person
01:34:15
so so that's how I live my life yeah and
01:34:17
what a great way to live your life got
01:34:18
it yeah bullshitting man it's been an
01:34:21
absolute pleasure it seems like you're
01:34:23
in a great place so you're heading off
01:34:25
now you go and pick up your son from
01:34:26
school how old is he uh so uh Lundy's
01:34:29
eleven turning 12. yeah you're right
01:34:31
okay so this is your middle one yeah
01:34:32
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah brilliant and
01:34:34
you're you're at a place now in your
01:34:36
relationship do you think you can be
01:34:38
more open and honest and vulnerable that
01:34:40
then you've been in any of your previous
01:34:41
100 yeah yeah like uh definitely you
01:34:45
know like you know you know I'm not
01:34:47
saying that I've got a perfect
01:34:48
relationship but don't but but what I do
01:34:50
have is we've got an honest relationship
01:34:52
and you know I think I think Honesty is
01:34:56
probably the most important thing you
01:34:58
can have yeah yeah you know like across
01:35:00
everything you know like business being
01:35:03
honest you know and it's it's it's not
01:35:07
hard to be honest it's actually really
01:35:08
easy because if you're honestly even if
01:35:11
it's hurtful like what can that other
01:35:13
person do you can all you can do is say
01:35:17
hey I'm just being honest yeah what do
01:35:19
you want me to do you want me to lie
01:35:21
I can lie if you want but yeah yeah you
01:35:24
know like but but it but it's actually
01:35:27
we find it really hard to be honest
01:35:29
because we don't like to hurt people and
01:35:31
that's you know we try and tiptoe around
01:35:32
things and go
01:35:34
there's just no point and then you just
01:35:36
in all you do is you start building up
01:35:38
this negative [ __ ] and like yeah you
01:35:40
just don't have I don't have time for
01:35:42
negativity I just want to I can tell
01:35:44
you're in a good place positive yeah um
01:35:46
well thanks for sharing your your wisdom
01:35:48
and there's a there's a lot of a lot of
01:35:50
it learned through the School of Hard
01:35:51
Knocks
01:35:55
and that's better it's been really it's
01:35:57
been really good to um you know it's
01:35:58
been quite uh
01:36:00
yeah it's been actually good to but it's
01:36:03
you know it's just I've just ended up
01:36:06
here because I've ended up here yeah I
01:36:07
feel like we've talked about more of the
01:36:09
bad stuff and the good [ __ ] I mean yeah
01:36:12
all those all that stuff all the stuff
01:36:14
that we've talked about like
01:36:15
professional relation I didn't think
01:36:16
we'd get onto that stuff but all that
01:36:17
stuff it shapes you I'm embarrassed of
01:36:20
some of that stuff and you know I wish
01:36:22
you know like I'd handle myself better
01:36:24
behave better in certain situations but
01:36:26
you know I'm I'm I'm where I am now I'm
01:36:30
at now and and I wouldn't be the person
01:36:32
I am today without all those things that
01:36:33
have that have happened and how's the
01:36:35
how's the future going to look like the
01:36:36
next five or ten years we're going to
01:36:38
see more of you in the public eye you do
01:36:39
the The Grand Design style sure yeah
01:36:41
yeah so I really enjoyed doing that show
01:36:43
it was really cool and it was nice to
01:36:45
you know I wanted to do that show Daryl
01:36:47
McEwen got a hold of me and I went you
01:36:49
know what maybe and I said ah I won't
01:36:52
get funny he said
01:36:54
and I sort of didn't think I said yes so
01:36:57
I'm thinking that it wouldn't get funny
01:36:58
and then it got funny I was like oh
01:36:59
bugger it oh you know I'm back in the
01:37:01
public argument but but I actually
01:37:03
really loved doing the show it was
01:37:05
really cool I made some fantastic people
01:37:07
a film crew were amazing I was way more
01:37:10
patient you know like when I was doing
01:37:12
TV back in the day we were just so
01:37:13
impatient and annoying and you know
01:37:16
different head space yeah different head
01:37:18
pace so so it was real cool so we would
01:37:20
we're filming another one um again this
01:37:23
year so
01:37:24
so that that's been that's been really
01:37:26
good and it's been nice to be able to
01:37:27
show people at different sides me you
01:37:29
know that's what's been cool so people
01:37:31
coming out to me and going wow you know
01:37:33
like it's been really nice for me people
01:37:36
coming up and going hey man really love
01:37:39
your show you know like it's not young
01:37:41
people it's all it's obviously older
01:37:42
people but yeah it's the older people
01:37:44
that had that opinion of me so most
01:37:46
people are coming up are all my age or
01:37:48
older and they're all the people that
01:37:49
would have been forming those opinions
01:37:51
of me when they were watching me on
01:37:52
those TV shows yeah well I mean you have
01:37:54
to grow up don't you like you can't you
01:37:55
can't be 54 and and start losing bets
01:37:58
and putting Mike Alice's on your face no
01:38:00
no no no no like and so I was never
01:38:02
going to do anything like that there's
01:38:04
people going oh you know why don't you
01:38:06
guys get back into game two hours we're
01:38:07
like oh come on don't be stupid you know
01:38:09
it's so past that stuff you're right but
01:38:11
yeah but it was nice just to be able to
01:38:13
do you know something that I I really
01:38:16
enjoy doing which is I I like I could
01:38:18
teach you and I like you know looking at
01:38:20
people's beautiful houses
01:38:21
well yeah and hopefully um seems to
01:38:23
think people listen to this podcast and
01:38:24
go ah okay that's uh that's not the
01:38:27
person I thought that'd be nice you know
01:38:29
like well and like to be honest I don't
01:38:31
care if they don't yeah yeah but but
01:38:33
you're not going to read the comments on
01:38:35
Instagram it's not going to worry me you
01:38:36
know like I'm not going to yell
01:38:37
Americans you know I like it at all you
01:38:39
know like and my son will go you go oh I
01:38:41
did
01:38:42
have you seen this you know get it out I
01:38:44
said they're good or bad he's like oh
01:38:47
don't need to know yeah you know like
01:38:49
anything ignorance is blood yeah he's
01:38:51
like sweet ass he said there's a couple
01:38:52
of good ones in there like read me the
01:38:55
good ones
01:38:56
I loved it and it was actually her mum I
01:38:59
I had no idea how to get hold of you but
01:39:00
I think you'd be a great guest so I
01:39:01
messaged your son Boston yeah on
01:39:03
Instagram yeah and he missed you and I
01:39:05
got a text back and I'm so I'm so
01:39:07
pleased you did yeah no me too me too
01:39:09
Don because you know I've obviously uh I
01:39:11
don't listen to a lot of radio but I
01:39:12
obviously know who you are and I've seen
01:39:14
you running up and down the street at a
01:39:16
million miles an hour I've been very
01:39:17
jealous about how quick he can run and
01:39:19
uh how fit you are well I think over the
01:39:21
years on my radio career I've probably
01:39:22
given you a little bit of [ __ ] about
01:39:23
riding your BMX shoes yeah yeah
01:39:27
um and and it was it was mean and
01:39:29
unnecessary yeah yeah yeah but it's it's
01:39:32
it is what it is you know like and it's
01:39:34
funny yeah like to jump on a BMX and
01:39:36
ride around town
01:39:38
obviously like I was actually courting a
01:39:41
lot of [ __ ] but it was something that I
01:39:43
was I loved doing yeah and obviously
01:39:46
you're not hurting anyway you're not
01:39:47
hurting anybody man I'm riding my bike
01:39:49
like Emily I didn't have a helmet on
01:39:51
because they couldn't be asked but I'm
01:39:53
riding my bike I like being in the sun
01:39:55
and like you know if if I was anywhere
01:39:58
else if I was that nobody would give a
01:39:59
[ __ ] right yeah because it's me
01:40:01
everyone's like oh who the hell does he
01:40:03
think he is well I don't think I'm
01:40:04
anybody I'm just riding my bike yeah but
01:40:07
it's funny I feel like we're gonna point
01:40:08
out where everyone talks about diversity
01:40:10
and acceptance and it's like you you
01:40:12
were hurting nobody yeah
01:40:14
yeah 100 and that's what I'm doing
01:40:16
living my best life brilliant Matthew
01:40:18
Ridge it's been an absolute pleasure
01:40:19
thanks buddy
01:40:20
okay thanks from all the way through
01:40:22
this episode of Runners only with dom
01:40:24
Harvey really hope you enjoyed it at the
01:40:26
risk of sounding like a scratchy record
01:40:28
um a couple of I don't know admin
01:40:30
housekeeping things as I do at the end
01:40:32
of all these things if you do like it
01:40:34
and you can think of someone that might
01:40:36
like it as well please let them know
01:40:38
word of mouth is the most powerful form
01:40:39
of marketing another really effective
01:40:41
way is um sharing it on your social
01:40:43
media channels that's really helpful as
01:40:44
well also wherever you get your podcast
01:40:46
from Spotify Apple whatever please give
01:40:49
it a rating if you like it or even a
01:40:50
review one other thing if you're in
01:40:52
business and you want to advertise this
01:40:54
podcast is growing at rates bigger than
01:40:55
what I ever anticipated considering
01:40:57
we're only like five or six months into
01:40:59
the journey we're currently averaging
01:41:00
about 15 000 downloads a week or 60 000
01:41:03
a month and I'm looking for sponsors and
01:41:05
advertisers to jump on board if that
01:41:07
sounds like you or your business let's
01:41:09
get talking you can email me at
01:41:11
domharveynz gmail.com I'm not gonna lie
01:41:14
a lot of work goes into this probably
01:41:15
more work than what I anticipated like
01:41:18
the amount of hours that have gone on to
01:41:19
it so far this year would put me well
01:41:21
below minimum wage in terms of the money
01:41:24
I've made back it's I mean it's not
01:41:25
about that but ultimately if I can make
01:41:28
enough money off this I can reinvest get
01:41:30
the camera quality better get some stuff
01:41:32
on YouTube and hopefully make this a job
01:41:34
I'm really passionate about what I'm
01:41:36
doing and these conversations I'm having
01:41:37
with amazing new zealanders so I really
01:41:39
really want to make this work so if you
01:41:41
can help in any way if you're a business
01:41:43
owner or you can think of a business
01:41:45
that could benefit by being on this
01:41:47
podcast please let's get talking
01:41:49
domharveynz gmail.com or message me on
01:41:52
Instagram domharvey NZ alright thanks
01:41:55
very much hope to see you next week
