00:00:01
hey guys I'm introducing Kevin Nealon one of my all-time favorites I won't be
00:00:06
doing with Dana he's in traffic and so I hurry and rushed and did it by myself because uh then I get to be me
00:00:15
sometimes I send an email I put subject me sometimes I don't you know it's going to
00:00:21
be a strug without Dana you're gonna have to strug through folks
00:00:27
shrug it up Kevin Nealon by the way Kevin neon has a
00:00:34
book out you know Kevin he does he does caricatures that fair to say cartoons he
00:00:39
draw he's great at it I don't know if he's done the Spade man but he's done a
00:00:44
bunch and I see him on his Instagram but the book is called I exaggerate my brushes with Fame classic Kevin Nealon
00:00:51
very clever title he paints or something you know in the brush do you get it oh my God I'm not
00:00:57
going to walk you through all of them okay by the way I saw Miles Teller the other night I was at uh
00:01:04
undisclosed Hollywood hot spot and I said if you ever host SNL you should have them all lined
00:01:11
up in the monologue the whole cast and just name them all sponge bath popcorn camel toe
00:01:21
if you want to kill do you want to bomb do something else and then you could add this noise when
00:01:27
the plane flies over wow
00:01:34
if you want call that I'll call it in anyway Kevin was is great with his jokes because you
00:01:40
know what he does he doesn't put any spin on him he puts nothing and I loved it because I used to
00:01:45
do stand-up when I started I was at the Improv and it's his name in the chalkboard I always say this but it was like Paul Reiser Jaylen or Jerry
00:01:52
Seinfeld Jeff Altman like all these great comics and I got to bring him up they made me be an emcee for a while
00:01:58
so I'd have to go and go what do you want me to say about you and I could just say I've been on Merv Griffin
00:02:03
Carson and you know Mike Douglas these are old shows and I'd go okay whatever they are
00:02:11
open for Joanne Worley and uh Phil is still you know it was like back in the day so but Kneeland was always one of
00:02:17
the ones I'd watch and I go God he does not put any spin on it driest stuff
00:02:22
the most throwaway jokes and I was sort of patterning after that like I was sort of a research paper of Dennis Miller and all the comics I like and then I kind of
00:02:29
went into my own thing but at the beginning you have to like people and you know but I also like Steve
00:02:35
Martin Eddie Murphy so you know you just never know but I I Kevin is great he was great to talk to as advertised I
00:02:42
was repeating a bunch of his jokes to him which I always do and um I think you'll like it here he is cavoni long
00:02:49
[Music]
00:02:56
I have a question for you but I gotta wait for Dana they said okay they're all dumb though how's it been going oh this
00:03:03
is going through the roof buddy awesome I think I don't know hey I love your red uh what's your audio podcast sorry well
00:03:10
I've been losing more stuff on the road you know I could leave it on airplane pockets and stuff I had like the little ones but they're kind of gone now along
00:03:18
with uh my apple pencil my iPad pencil you know I was on a flight this week and
00:03:24
in in the seat back in front of me it said this whole
00:03:30
you know placket about the safety briefing has been scrubbed down with antibacterial stuff it's stamped on it I
00:03:36
go I don't believe it I was skeptical yeah yeah because they never even
00:03:42
touched it after that and I was like I touched it I don't believe the life preservers work either you know
00:03:50
well I I have such a terrible fear of flying when they come around and we get to a comfortable cruising altitude and
00:03:57
they go well would you would you like a beverage so inside I'm screaming for a beer because my pulse is like 160. yeah
00:04:04
but I'm like oh I don't know um what do you got um I'll have grapefruit juice not I
00:04:09
guess I'll have a Heineken oh you dance around a little bit well my wife she has no fear of flying so she orders coffee
00:04:16
and a Heineken and then I order a Heineken and then I have two and then I
00:04:21
put them on her tray and I kind of shrugged to the flight attendant like I don't know she's got an issue
00:04:27
you beat the system one time I was joking I'm on the ground I don't drink yeah go ahead one time I was joking
00:04:34
around with a flight attendant it was like a 7 A.M flight she goes can I get you something to drink I said y'all have
00:04:39
a scotch on the rocks and it was like or ordering orange juice he goes okay I want that on the Rocks okay what would
00:04:45
you like something sir you know because a lot of people drink uh when they're flying because because of fear and
00:04:51
flying I this famous actress flew next to me once haha guess who the Sofia
00:04:57
Lauren no no it predates her but anyway this actress was really cool because
00:05:02
they came around with these vodka lemon drinks on this flight and she goes I'll
00:05:07
do it twice as opposed to give me two of them and she kept saying I'm gonna sleep
00:05:13
later so I'll do it twice so that's what I say to my wife ladies and Gentlemen
00:05:19
The Comedy why is anyone listen Dana my airplane bits I think I did on my first
00:05:27
Tonight Show airplane bits are a real staple of comedians I feel and I think
00:05:33
we all have some and I remember the one that I can't do anymore a cause it's old
00:05:39
even though Seinfeld said you should still do old jokes but I said when you're in first class and then they
00:05:46
you're in coach and they you're a loser and Coach so the lady will walk out of
00:05:51
first class and look at you then she looks back and shuts the little curtain so you can't even see the people in
00:05:56
first class she's like it's a good sound too and then she she snaps it shut and then
00:06:02
she comes back later with the tire gun and goes I'm not looking I remember this one
00:06:09
I like the effects I know what that is I know what that curtain clothes looks like from first class but not from coach
00:06:14
oh you look back and you go can you get Walmart's snap you know what's on my flight uh two
00:06:20
weeks ago Jon Hamm oh Jon Hamm I didn't say anything to him because I didn't have to walk back to coach you know what
00:06:27
I mean can I do my impression of uh Jon Hamm
00:06:33
yeah I don't even know you what's that from Bridesmaids I can't I don't even know
00:06:41
you it's your mom it's someone asking him a favor on Mad Men I don't even oh you know I see I can't hear myself I've
00:06:48
seen memes where because I'm like I'm representing the younger generation here I've seen
00:06:54
me things medium Square because I'm tragically still on Instagram but I uh
00:07:00
they show John Hammond an elevator or something and someone says something to him and then they put a picture of John
00:07:06
hem going I don't even know you so it must be a famous line from the show it
00:07:11
also makes you do the impression Kevin what's your what's your uh famous for you uh airplane bit
00:07:17
do you have one oh uh yeah it's um I was flying the other day and I think the pilot was a little inexperienced
00:07:25
it was already fun we're getting ready to take off because folks uh we'll be talk taken off in a
00:07:32
few minutes well here we go well I love that he's a little an
00:07:37
experience I was kind of I think we got half we got we were up in the air for like we were up in the air for like 20 minutes and he comes back on the piegos
00:07:44
uh folks I can't seem to figure out where oh never mind I got it
00:07:50
oh here's a good one I go we land I go why are you allowed to land anywhere near the actual airport we're taxing
00:07:57
around and going I'm like hey I saw some lights over there oh we're going this way and then I go all right and then we
00:08:03
got to the gate and and we we're not even allowed to park at the gate and then we so we just then we uh start
00:08:12
following this pilot he's walking to a plane uh because I see him holding his keys but then uh he's just getting
00:08:18
something on his plane so he can't park there he's and sort of I think that was it it was
00:08:25
better I was in an emergency uh Landing once and I got many of them I just I
00:08:31
discovered that the overhead luggage compartments are not emergency exits
00:08:38
I did one that would probably have to cut this out but I was playing spellbinders in Houston in the 80s I
00:08:46
didn't go on the road that much but Bill Hicks who's a famous comedian who passed away was my opener so he would dare me
00:08:53
to do a hockey opening so I don't know if it was my joke and I couldn't do it today it'll be canceled but it was like
00:08:59
I'd go up and I'd go hey ladies and gentlemen I flew here on Mexicana Airlines it was a great Airline the
00:09:04
pilot had dice hanging in the cockpit and uh he just thought that was the greatest thing ever that guy would go on
00:09:11
stage with a sport coat for like 20 minutes he had a big sport coat on he's doing all his jokes and then he would
00:09:17
reach in and pull out an ice cold Budweiser beer he kept it in his jacket
00:09:22
like a magician for 20 minutes of that one joke anyway every time you tried to drink one
00:09:29
time he tried to uh drink a dove he pulled out by mistake oh I had that with great what was he the Great Scott at
00:09:35
comedy magic club the birds he he'd get them and and they they come out of his
00:09:41
jacket you know where they were coming from and right right went out and it was dead
00:09:48
paper ladies hey no but Kevin you'll like this
00:09:55
story I think because we're comedians but I was telling somebody last night that one of my buddies was a waiter at
00:10:02
the Dallas improv Dallas improv I loved the old one in Dallas off uh Central and
00:10:07
walnut I think and it was right next to Kroger's and so a comedian came in and
00:10:12
he was there in the day but you know setting up and the comedian the headliner it's kind of jerky I don't
00:10:18
even know it was for real but he came in he starts bossing him one around getting the keys to the condo and you know
00:10:24
asking him this and that and sort of being pushy so the waiters realize they didn't like him and then he came back in
00:10:31
for the show and he goes to my buddy hey come here and he goes because this is some people
00:10:36
that listen to this no comedy you have to adapt to a city so he goes what's the big store around here is it uh Alpha
00:10:44
Beta because no it's Kroger's that's the one around the corner and he goes yeah yeah okay and you guys have a Circle K
00:10:49
he goes no we have 7-Eleven he goes yeah okay okay you know he's working his act out and then he goes and what's this big uh huge street right in front of you
00:10:56
with all the traffic he goes oh that's Apollo Boulevard which was a lie and so the guy gets up and he starts killing
00:11:02
and then he goes and that was crazy I couldn't even get her because of Apollo Boulevard he just comes to a con complete screeching hall and then he
00:11:09
goes Apollo over here and someone goes Central Expressway goes no Apollo he's
00:11:14
arguing with you and then he just keeps taking a deeper hone he comes with my friend later he's like you [ __ ] dick
00:11:21
and he's like he goes oh yeah you know what I said it wrong that is Central Expressway Mike Myers and I were playing
00:11:28
Green Bay Wisconsin I think so we can't they said oh they love it if they love it if you say cheese heads so we went up
00:11:35
there I don't know if we're doing Wayne cars or whatever like cheese heads cheese heads I swear there was almost a
00:11:42
riot that is like a slur that is geez and we kept doing it I don't know what's
00:11:47
going on man anyway we should introduce Our Guest today Kevin Kevin Ellen yeah
00:11:52
live All-Star weeds uh how many times he's been on The Tonight Show how many
00:11:58
specials three three stand-up specials four two two two but working on the
00:12:03
third two but all good material yeah I didn't space it out like a lot of comics you know Seinfeld said Seinfeld says
00:12:10
every comedian even the good ones have about an hour 20 of good material even if they do 10 specials he goes you're
00:12:17
quoting Seinfeld a lot I know that's not you know what that's the only second time that's it but uh he's the pope because it's more to come yeah that's to
00:12:24
see every quarter the rules of how you're supposed to stand up you can obey him or not but he has definite rules
00:12:29
what does Seinfeld say about Jesus I don't do religion then how half the
00:12:35
people hate you you know I think this is a big compliment Kevin some of the top comedians will talk and say Kevin is one
00:12:43
of the tallest comedians that has to mean something to you it's really a compliment you know because
00:12:48
you know there's rumors out there that I'm not that tall so when somebody validates that for me it really
00:12:55
and it's it's weird too because I have a fear of heights so every day I live in fear you know Kevin you know I was
00:13:03
saying the other day that uh if you're ever around a vulture don't play dead because that's what they want
00:13:08
that's right that's right that's one of kneeling's old bits um not even a bit it's more of a line
00:13:15
yeah that's yours I didn't know that was mine oh for real it's funny yeah uh I let's go back and say before we get to
00:13:22
SNL when I when Kevin Neal and I used to
00:13:27
watch and I was when I started and I was at the Improv which was a big deal I was doing hosting which is a hard job and I
00:13:34
would host and have to bring every comic up from 8 to 1am and I'd end in the hallway and I go what do you want me to
00:13:40
say about you and so I'd kind of know Comics kind of you know acquaintances because they'd say oh you're the MC blah
00:13:46
blah but Kneeland I was on the chalkboard uh Carvey wasn't there as much but I was pretty influenced by a
00:13:54
little peppering of Kneeland a little Carvey a little uh Dennis Miller and when you're starting out you start to
00:14:01
see all these great Comics right in front of you you don't have to wait a week or three to see him on Carson or something so I got influence but
00:14:09
you guys were all great and then uh and then something happened remember Neil and when I got kicked out of John
00:14:16
mulrooney's place because uh his roommate who actually
00:14:22
passed away God that comic was great uh and then um I said you said oh why don't
00:14:27
you rent my room while I you got SNL remember that whole thing yeah yeah you
00:14:32
rented my room and alciona I'm alciona yeah so it was me you Bob
00:14:39
Dubach Dana above the garage
00:14:44
Joe Kenny Joe Kenny Joe Kenny we lived above the garage it was like a little
00:14:49
mini compound not fancy at all I got hassled by the Postal Service there that's a whole other story but my wife
00:14:55
and I were saving her salary which was 29 000 a year working for a state
00:15:01
assemblyman so we could save up and buy a house so it was 300 bucks a month and
00:15:06
it was just a room with a sink we had a hot plate I come up back after a gig and
00:15:11
just watch TV with headphones on and she would sleep and Kevin was uh rented it to us or Kevin and Bob or Kevin invited
00:15:18
us to live there Bob was like the ringleader of the place I was just a winner I had that little bedroom on the
00:15:25
end there but I went back there um about a year ago with my wife and son to just see what it
00:15:32
looked like and the owners were there and they had filled in the driveway with a yard and a swing set what that comes
00:15:39
across the front you could park a little bit in there but it doesn't have that big Park uh parking lot yeah I told him
00:15:46
we used to live there and um and in fact the guy's wife Dana did your costume
00:15:53
for the commercial you guys did or wardrobe for the uh or the Wayne and Garth or the uh Wayne and Garth for the
00:15:59
Super Bowl commercial oh really yeah so she knew you but they gave me a tour of
00:16:05
the place I went inside and um they changed it around a little bit I saw where your apartment was which is their office now and there's like a downstairs
00:16:12
you know nobody lives downstairs they have a staircase and a living room that goes down to the lower apartment wait
00:16:18
was there it was all one wow one story right like you're you're yeah
00:16:24
there was a couple that lived downstairs with their baby downstairs I don't remember that
00:16:31
no I wasn't loud because but Neil was very nice because when he come back on the I just done like Police Academy I
00:16:39
was pretty new and when you guys would come home that was really exciting because you had War
00:16:44
Stories and you would say hi to me and Neil and you would stay on the couch you wouldn't even kick me out of the room
00:16:50
because you thought that was unfair why don't I remember any of this stuff I know because I was forgettable and I've
00:16:55
been told that by my parents my especially my dad I do remember that when you got on SNL I lost I lost my
00:17:02
subletter so you really kind of screwed me over there oh yeah that is true
00:17:08
[Music]
00:17:15
in this mid 80s thing and we all eventually ended up on SNL but when I
00:17:21
met David I wasn't never had been on SL when I met Kevin he'd never been on SNL I got on SNL by a long long story for
00:17:29
another time but then freakily they they had one last slot they were trying to
00:17:35
cast in New York and this is true it sounds funny at the time but they mentioned Chevy or somehow I don't know
00:17:41
if they were serious it was somebody tall or something so I I said well I
00:17:46
know someone tall and then shoot through whatever imaginations Bruce Lee gray or
00:17:51
whatever Kevin came out to the studio and I think so now Kevin's auditioning
00:17:57
but the show had been cast but I think we were in 8h and didn't you just sort of stand
00:18:04
near Us near like eight or ten people do stand up or yeah it wasn't a typical
00:18:09
audition I don't think yeah um yeah I went there and I immediately got
00:18:15
tired when I walked into that studio because I used to fall asleep watching that show and it was an association thing you know yeah you were right yeah
00:18:22
so I um David and I used to do uh characters at our house and I'll see on a drive in the
00:18:28
Hollywood Hills you know we would stand out in the driveway and just kind of Riff on on different like a couple of
00:18:34
different characters and I didn't do any characters or accents or Impressions you know I was just a stand-up a really
00:18:39
really good stand-up yes it's true I'll show you you'll see oh no I don't want to make an object I'd like to make an
00:18:46
observation the thing about your style of stand up which really lent itself to this high pressure situation was you
00:18:53
never know when you're you've started like you're suddenly kind of talking and you there's no presentation or like now
00:18:59
here's my joke you just starts doing that Sly kind of you know you always gotta you gotta you gotta get Pace with
00:19:05
life whatever and then so you you essentially killed but go ahead so yeah so I go to Studio at age and typically
00:19:12
they have you on the center stage I guess and you have to do like three characters and yeah accents or something
00:19:18
I don't know what it is but there wasn't that demand when I went there and I just kind of I did the characters we worked
00:19:25
on a couple of I think it was a couple of Sammy's and it was like the two guys the two porn stars talking about you
00:19:32
know talking about very casual stuff where someone a little undercooked yeah totally oh they never got fully baked
00:19:39
they were married it's like here's a wispy idea that I'm [ __ ] just throwing [ __ ] out to hope something you
00:19:45
guys that's what I was doing yeah they look for a nugget of a thought they they I think Downing those guys and Lauren
00:19:51
they go I like that weird idea even if it's undercooked and it's not quite
00:19:57
fully uh formed and written out well we got great writers here you give us that idea we throw it around the table I bet
00:20:02
we could come up with something so that's what I learned they like but go ahead sorry go ahead my memories uh
00:20:08
tells me that I was sitting I was standing at the end of the bleachers or something and yeah it was on the floor
00:20:15
and everybody like Dennis Miller you John Levitz noradon Lauren Hill yeah
00:20:21
Marcy yeah Phil oh that I don't know if it was there but anyway they're all you
00:20:26
guys were all on the bleachers watching me and I did my thing you know it was very short and then I left you know
00:20:33
what's funny oh yeah his act is so dry that it's almost I I think I took a page
00:20:38
out of that because if it doesn't work you're almost like it wasn't supposed to work
00:20:44
I'm just talking I was just talking and I'm now I'm leaving I'm out there screaming desperately trying to get
00:20:49
laughs and if I swing in a Miss it's over but Kevin I want to know that the
00:20:55
timeline from when you first heard in California hey uh you they might be interested in
00:21:01
SNL can you fly to New York you do your thing is that like a week later and then you find out the next day or what how
00:21:08
soon it was very quick it was very quick I remember that it was like a weekend like on Friday I think they told me I
00:21:15
have it I'm coming to New York I didn't have the chance to really to tell my friends that I was on SNL and I just
00:21:21
packed up I got spayed to rent my room and I went to New York did you stay at the Omni Berkshire I think so and I or
00:21:28
the Essex House I don't even remember like I didn't even know New York that well and Al Franken said you got to find
00:21:34
a good neighborhood to live in I think is it New York a neighborhood is it I didn't know there were separate neighborhood you know you got to find a
00:21:41
place that's close to a Subway and something with the grocery stores you know like the upper west side or whatever yeah so Dana and I actually
00:21:48
after a couple years in we lived in the same apartment building on Broadway yeah
00:21:54
Bromley is very very nice I think Mikey my first state of the Bromley and then
00:21:59
Farley moved into the Bromley huh well there was a movie theater right underneath it which was kind of cool and
00:22:06
it was close to the park and it wasn't too expensive across some
00:22:11
zabars and H&H Bagels not far away yeah and uh everyone lived Upper West that I
00:22:17
knew Andy and Katie my uh relatives lived up there and and then slowly I'm
00:22:22
not jumping ahead but slowly people trickled to the village and I didn't because I only knew my little haunts and
00:22:27
by the time it was over I didn't know anybody up there because you guys yeah I moved I moved to the West Village and it
00:22:32
was a beautiful Federal uh style home I think they call it you know like a brownstone and we
00:22:38
have the top two floors Dana did you ever come over there I don't think so I never obviously it was it had four
00:22:44
fireplaces High ceilings and um it was just really cool and it was
00:22:49
right next to the Meat Market District which is now like the hip place but back then it was really the meat market and
00:22:54
at night when I came home from SNL I'd see these like Rave clubs where the these transgenders out front you know
00:23:00
waiting to go in you know like three in the morning and uh but now it's like totally gentrified and it's beautiful so
00:23:07
what on so then maybe what a week or two later you're you're premiering on Saturday Night Live yeah are you at the
00:23:14
beginning of a season are you at the I'm at the beginning of uh yeah okay 86. the
00:23:19
first the first show yeah uh it was
00:23:24
um Sigourney Weaver oh good yes at the end of that week when she was
00:23:31
saying the good nights I was so jealous because she got to go she got to leave and I had it kind of like she was like a
00:23:37
prisoner getting released just just because of the how did you handle the nerves because
00:23:43
yeah it's just crazy right well you know what I pretended because the year before that the ratings were so low and they
00:23:49
almost pulled the plug in fact we all lived out of our suitcases every day we didn't know if the show was going to get canceled so um I that's what I kept in mind I
00:23:56
thought nobody's watching this show otherwise my nerves would have killed me and I thought you know I'm used to playing in front of 300 people which is
00:24:02
about how many are in that studio and then I remember I was still nervous though and were away from a commercial
00:24:08
and my first sketch was Mr subliminal which is kind of like two conversations at once you know oh wow that was your on
00:24:15
the first show you got to do that yeah so 10 seconds before the sketch is
00:24:20
supposed to start you know we're away at a commercial and we're coming back from the commercial Lauren comes up to me and he puts his
00:24:27
hand on my shoulder and he says to me are you sure this is what you want yeah
00:24:32
what that's his way to relax you I suppose but he would say those funny
00:24:38
things so give us 10 seconds of Mr subliminal so people know what we're talking about well Mrs subliminal is a
00:24:44
guy who kind of inserts these uh words into a sense to get what he wants you know like uh if I go to if I go to a
00:24:51
deli or something I said you know I think I'll have the corned beef sandwich your treatment maybe you know why don't
00:24:56
you throw in uh a Diet Coke too whiskey and uh that'll be good for me you know he manipulates his way through life like
00:25:03
subliminal messages and his name is subliminal yeah I love it first show you
00:25:08
got a good one on yeah I got a good one and I started getting recognized right away that's that's the funnest part I
00:25:14
mean it takes a while to get famous and then you just stay famous but it takes it takes longer back then SNL there was
00:25:22
probably SNL and maybe HBO there wasn't a ton of choices I mean there was three networks or four networks maybe and
00:25:28
cable was very new Cable's new oh yeah so it wasn't so overriding and uh you
00:25:34
would get recognized there was a water cooler effect to it and Kevin and I and
00:25:40
you know we had a small cast so everyone got involved pretty quickly you're on two or three things this show was Jan
00:25:46
that year you met Jan on the show I love Jan Hooks she was yeah and Phil Hartman and Kevin and I
00:25:53
came in and then Lovitz and Dennis Nora Dunn and Whitney Brown were there David
00:26:00
you hadn't started Victoria Jackson so you were okay my first show was Kevin's
00:26:05
for sure I was living with Lauren in Long Island but then I got a place in in Manhattan and my first show was Kevin's
00:26:13
first show but I've been there since August hanging out I was about to say you you actually had some influence you
00:26:18
haven't even started yet I was with Lauren for a month I didn't know he should come out and I and initially it was just me I was I was the only one out
00:26:24
there and then Chevy Chase scary that you would go stay with Lauren and see McCartney and these guys McCartney
00:26:30
hanging out every night with McCartney we all got to know Paul McCartney the Paul well Lauren does one of it he knows
00:26:37
there's Paul Simon and Paul McCarty so he said Paul was coming over tonight and you have to ask Paul who that would be
00:26:44
McCartney and I'd never even been on television
00:26:50
we're all having lunch I think it was Central Cafe in New York it was me Steve Martin Lauren and maybe Billy Joel
00:26:59
was there too and Steve was talking about Cher and I mean uh Lauren was talking about
00:27:05
Cher and Steve piped in he goes sure who [Laughter]
00:27:11
Steve for having those big jokes like in his old albums which I used to memorize and those crazy things he would also say
00:27:19
the driest [ __ ] like that too so fun yeah yeah yeah but um yeah I mean that
00:27:25
was Lauren everybody does Impressions with Lauren too you know every cast member
00:27:30
through the generations but the other thing about us being on uh when we were it was a small cast and then it started
00:27:37
getting bigger and bigger like our introductions only lasted maybe two minutes and now if you watch it there's
00:27:43
like 50 people on the show even like in one sketch featuring so and so somebody
00:27:50
who might be on somebody who might be on he's standing by we'll see uh so-and-so and a contest winner yeah I think Kevin
00:27:59
and I were on the last small cast show and then it grew with Mike Myers and
00:28:04
then David and Adam and everybody else but initially I think it was just like six of it was kind of like three or four
00:28:10
well what happened kind of ran out of tricks and Lauren kind of saw the writing on the wall he goes we gotta get
00:28:16
some bread more energy in here some more people with some ideas it was like covid that was expanding and we were like the
00:28:23
Delta coming in it was just yeah getting bigger I came in I came out and hard and fast with the lady but I I had the
00:28:30
benefit of having a lady the lady and Phil and Jan were on it and the host would be on it Sean Penn beat me up and
00:28:37
stuff but the the only time it was very conscious with Kevin and I doing a tour
00:28:42
with Dennis was our uh eventual Hans and Franz uh characters it was great are you
00:28:50
to the Swatch tour that's right it's a Swatch tour I was so jealous I heard you guys are making six
00:28:55
grand a night I was [ __ ] I was like no that was five grand a night yeah oh
00:29:00
my God okay I feel better um yeah I was I went and saw it in Arizona and it was like so huge for
00:29:07
comedian there were like three great comedians are coming to town it was Unreal and you don't have to do that
00:29:12
long I probably do a half each or something I remember we were in Denver it was our last I think stop on the tour
00:29:20
and John Travolta came with some mutual friends of mine yeah he offered us all a
00:29:26
ride back to LA he was piloting uh a jet his jet and I jumped on it I said yeah
00:29:32
I'll go but you and Dennis Dana were uh fearful Flyers so you said no I was a
00:29:38
huge Welcome Back Cotter fan but I couldn't imagine that guy steering but I I've been tapped out I've been hearing
00:29:45
tapped out a few times in my life Impressionists get tapped out so I was doing Travolta that night a really silly
00:29:52
stupid pit whatever you know all these guys like this and that and the crowd starts really starting to Roar obviously
00:29:58
he's sneaking up behind me and I'm really you know because you know oh my God and then he Taps me on the shoulder
00:30:04
and then he says you know I think it's a sincerest form of flattery
00:30:10
I tell people because you always they always ask who was the best this this this this and this I would say Travolta
00:30:17
was the most accessible real uh Superstar I've ever met like
00:30:23
instantly liking him and he was just very affable didn't you find Kevin I mean it's just his choice yeah no since
00:30:28
he was a superstar at all nothing he just he just loves being in the business
00:30:33
and acting and when he was hosting that week um
00:30:39
he he really befriended Jan and gave her a nice long leather brown jacket for her
00:30:45
birthday and one thing we all went over to Jan's apartment it was me and Johnny and our mutual friends Linda and Anthony
00:30:53
and we get to uh and we were each doing our impression of
00:31:00
his character from Greece like that one scene where he leans against the wall you know he leans against the wall and
00:31:06
turns around with a cigarette in his mouth yeah yeah that's hilarious we're all doing that impression and then John
00:31:12
went last and he nailed it I mean he won the conversation [ __ ] cool yeah he
00:31:18
was the best at doing it that's amazing yeah he must have been practicing but that's what he's like you know he'll do
00:31:24
that stuff I was only on the show a little bit when I met him and about
00:31:30
three years later I was at Sushi 101 on Beverly and I was eating and he came in with a
00:31:36
hat and he's ordering to go stuff and I'm like this [ __ ] looked like yeah and then he turns around and looks
00:31:43
and then he keeps ordering gets his bag and turns on he goes hey it's John what's up remember me I was on SNL with
00:31:50
you I go I remember you yeah I saw Greece 45 times yeah and then Sonic fever and like right around the same
00:31:57
time Bam Bam Urban cow monster monster that same week we were uh he was hosting
00:32:04
we all went to the Palms restaurant on the uh Lower East Side and we're walking these give him some breathing room
00:32:14
we were walking up Third Avenue and this is like in 1994 or 95. way after Welcome Back
00:32:22
Cotter and there's this uh homeless guy sitting on the sidewalk and he's looking
00:32:28
down and as we're approaching he goes he he goes hey you guys got any spare and he looks up and he sees droved
00:32:35
he goes Anthony barbarino that was the last time that guy probably
00:32:40
watched TV Dude how how funny was that [ __ ] uh Tarantino's Welcome Back
00:32:46
Cotter how funny was that skit that was a great one well Kevin you remember that John Travolta came to Saturday Night
00:32:51
Live just to be a fly on the wall to hang out and learn the show and that's when when I met him and um then he
00:32:59
hosted later but I think I'd left by then so I missed that part but yeah he just was hanging I don't miss the one
00:33:05
where oh the Tarantino one yeah where it was oh my God I got to be horse check Mr
00:33:10
cutter you know who I missed by a couple of
00:33:16
seconds was when George Harrison came and stopped by the writers oh no wow
00:33:21
yeah he came is that one he played the piano no he was playing the piano was thanks to Al franken's office and Al
00:33:27
Franken didn't know it was George Harrison and he was yelling from his office keep it quiet I'm trying to write
00:33:32
that song wow I'm just trying to write a songs
00:33:38
shut up when he flipped the and the writers
00:33:44
remember he flipped the table he's mad and he smashed his toe oh you might be gone he was arrested Alice Alice like
00:33:52
stocky you know and he was a wrestler one night him and um Farley sorry I was
00:34:00
spaced out for him and Farley went at it like like hardcore
00:34:05
fighting each other wrestle yeah but but for playful fun but it was intense those two guys yeah it was always super
00:34:12
competitive Franklin was always um uh kind of exploring he wanted to be a
00:34:18
part of your history like I was a football player so he wanted to play football you know we would play basketball uh he
00:34:26
wanted to rest with Farley that was the thing about Farley too Farley was really even as heavy as he was he was so light
00:34:32
on his feet and it was a good basketball player really coordinated you saw him skating in the rink you know well that's
00:34:37
what shockingly so funny light on his feet yeah yeah that Nancy Kerrigan sketch I don't know if you guys remember
00:34:42
that one was uh the whole show wasn't that great but he uh he was an ice
00:34:48
skating one yeah yeah it was very good Wisconsin look at him on the down by the river thing just anyway
00:34:57
[Music] who was your biggest Idol on that show
00:35:03
that you got to meet uh um I'll tell you who it was she okay it was Neil Young
00:35:10
I had to be Neil Young but Paul McCartney I met before the show so it doesn't really count in real life but
00:35:16
meeting Neil Young was quite a thrill and one night I don't know if you were there Kevin we went out to dinner like
00:35:21
with six or eight people with Neil and I was with Phil and I said Phil let's make
00:35:27
Neil Young helpless with laughter let's see if we can really get him so we're doing every stick we can every accent
00:35:34
just going crazy just to get him to helpless and we did just to pay him back fun story right kids
00:35:40
that is good that is good I like that I like it people when you're on Saturday
00:35:46
Night Live you just meet famous people doing sketch comedy so they're they're
00:35:51
especially vulnerable and they're looking to you for advice after the first couple Seasons it's interesting
00:35:57
isn't it I find that anybody who's ever hosted no matter how long ago it was they're still
00:36:03
your best buddy because they latch on to you because they're so scared on that show they laughed out shoot no sense
00:36:09
forever ever yeah you you skip a few levels of casual friendship and you get
00:36:15
in there because you're in the trenches so fast and you're explaining cue cards
00:36:20
or you're saying this or you're telling when to get if you start crying on Friday night that's normal don't freak out because it's so overwhelming to go
00:36:26
we haven't even rehearsed half this [ __ ] and it's tomorrow and I don't even know what's going on and they start my
00:36:31
clothes are made of Velcro yeah
00:36:40
the famous famous movie star yeah uh and he had a gigantic thing of Jack
00:36:46
Daniels in his in his room but he was incredible on the show you know just you
00:36:52
meet so many eclectic people I remember he stopped he stopped um one of the sketches right in the middle during the
00:36:58
table read and he uh he was explaining what hoodlums where that word came from and
00:37:05
it was and it just it broke the whole pacing of the sketch you know oh yeah
00:37:10
and Neil Neil were you up were you Neil did you were you a bartender it was that
00:37:17
in were you born in The Improv right I work as a bartender for two years at The
00:37:22
Improv I was 25 26. at the impromo Melrose yeah and then and then Eddie
00:37:28
Eddie Who's the bartender now to go over for me and that was like really 30 30 I don't know 30 years ago he's still he's
00:37:35
still bartending and people love him I told Addie I said you're like a friend of me so you know what I'm just gonna order all my drinks and then I'll tip
00:37:42
you at the end but I meant the end when he quits when he does yeah so I said he
00:37:48
can't quit now I saw a line Neil was a bartender and they said here's a trivia question what was Kevin's
00:37:55
joke about bartending and so I try to guess and they wrote a joke kind of to
00:38:00
sound like you and use the real answer which is probably a lie was I just try to put as
00:38:07
much alcohol in as possible and the other answers were I just try to
00:38:13
get the color right of the drink and the other one was kind of funny said I just
00:38:18
tell them to tip me up front that sounds like a joke I guess that one that sounds like a joke you'd say which
00:38:24
one was it Kevin well the truth is I mean it wasn't even a joke it's just I never bartended before so I didn't know
00:38:30
how to make drinks I had the boss bartender guard guy below the bar if somebody ordered like a 707 I Flip Flip
00:38:37
through the pages and find out how to make it but I I had that college mentality where I thought the more alcohol in the drink the better they'll
00:38:43
like it so often people would come back with their drink and say could you put a
00:38:48
little more uh club soda in here it's really this is too strong I said okay all right I'm just trying to help you
00:38:54
out Kevin I have another thing is this your joke you know I always know your jokes but when you say you remember my
00:39:01
jokes from the 80s when you remember your jokes and I swear I've seen a million Comics I don't know why yours I
00:39:06
remember but uh they're all funny but when you say you had a lobster you were
00:39:12
cooking a lobster and you went to cook it and you said tell me if I get this right you go I went to put in the pot
00:39:18
but then I looked they had a little face I go you know what this is an animal and it does not deserve to die so you know
00:39:23
what I did I got my car I took it out the woods I let it go because she got to do the right thing sometimes because you
00:39:29
guys have a joke that's Kevin that's a good paraphrase paraphrase of it yeah I always thought it'd be funny to have a
00:39:35
show where uh the comics girlfriend or wife does their act and they don't get
00:39:41
it quite right but they kind of paraphrase it you know all my friends go I could do your act I go it's so
00:39:47
intricate and complicated I dare you and then they do it exactly I go huh well the trajectory the evolution of the wife
00:39:54
slash girlfriend is initially she's kind of pretty much in the front row watching your act then she's Midway back then
00:40:00
she's standing in the back then she's in the green she doesn't she's in the green yeah
00:40:06
and then she'll meet you after and finally she's just at home where she stays home yeah yeah going how was it
00:40:12
did you guys like going to be after parties on Saturday Night Live God you're always You're So wired I was
00:40:19
never really in it enough to be wired but I would get energy from doing the good nights and waving at night so and
00:40:27
then they'd had do you remember this Marcy was always scared because too many people would figure out the party so
00:40:32
you'd guess it was Lauren's assistant yeah you get a ticket she'd walk by and hand you a ticket like right before air
00:40:39
or something like that's what you're thinking about but I was and then they go hey the tickets party's going to be here it's
00:40:45
gonna be here he's me and so you'd have this and then after the show you'd get a limo that guy Max would be out there and
00:40:52
go Spade you want to go with Farley yeah you want to go to Timmy Meadows and they try to double us up because we weren't the big stars but you guys get your own
00:40:59
limo and you get you to the party and then they would get you home
00:41:04
uh and then the party was it was always so late I think it's a big status thing now but man to wait if you're not on the
00:41:11
show to sit there and wait till one to go to the party which is more like 1 30. that's a late night I would opt not to
00:41:17
go to the after party because I was so exhausted from the show and I wanted to be able to get up in the morning on Sunday and enjoy my one day off but I
00:41:24
always had guests coming in that they wanted to go the after party oh they have to yeah it's not even really a
00:41:29
party it's just everybody's at the same restaurant you get your own table you get your own bill food you know
00:41:36
yeah you pay for your all your guests and your friends and um so and then you know everyone's at
00:41:43
their own table and there's just a lot of gawkers and you'd walk around and the host would like to say hello to you but
00:41:50
I it Kevin I don't know if I'm right about this but the show was so in the doldrums when we got on cars were not
00:41:55
provided to go to the party so you me and Dennis would be out it'd be like snowing and we'd be trying to get a cab
00:42:01
to go to the party I don't know when cars came in but we did not have cars at least in those first few shows because
00:42:08
we love it we only had an eight show pickup Dino Minot told us we had eight shows so if we don't hit the ground run
00:42:15
running we're out here by Christmas yeah yeah we were living on our cars and we even shared an office together you and
00:42:21
me Kevin and I shared an office that was very humble very small and we would sit
00:42:26
in there for hours trying to Rift especially when Hans and Franz came we would go and really we got
00:42:33
so silly I mean you're so tired and stressed out sometimes I put on music on
00:42:38
a Boombox and you me Victoria and Dennis would just dance around in there right
00:42:43
just because of the stress yeah yeah and then I remember like Sandler and Farley and YouTube said you didn't
00:42:51
you guys have a an office on the other side by the writers room next to Chris rocks we had uh herb Sergeant sold
00:42:58
update office so it was like that corner yeah it was like a frat house in there I'd go in there there'd be like Playboy
00:43:05
magazines everywhere pizza boxes on the floor and then you go into Rock's office and it was like pristine he had like
00:43:11
Malcolm X posters Martin Luther King all kinds of African-American culture books
00:43:16
on this you know and just spotless where there's all idiots because Farley would wipe his butt with the USA Today you
00:43:23
know um one time I was going to the wrap party and they said and they go hey and then I see I see
00:43:30
Norm on Monday I think you guys overlap with norm and he goes I go Norm I didn't
00:43:35
see it to party goes no I go well I saw you getting limo I went to
00:43:41
Atlantic City why to gamble like I'm the [ __ ] to
00:43:48
gamble I go oh well sorry I don't know I thought those are for the party the poor limo driver's going keep going straight
00:43:55
sir we're about 30 minutes away from the party I think it's at Ollie's every week
00:44:00
he'd surprise the level driver Atlantic City I know the guy goes oh
00:44:06
[ __ ] I get Norm I'm going to be back tomorrow Lovitz was telling me a story where uh or somebody was telling me
00:44:11
about how love it's loaned uh Norm a couple hundred dollars like 200 to
00:44:16
gamble and the next day Norm didn't pay him back and they were touring somewhere
00:44:22
together and then the next day he asked him again he goes Norm you got the 200 and he kept asking them and then after a week after he asked them Norm goes you
00:44:30
only lost 200 I lost five thousand dollars
00:44:36
why are you riding me for I lost like eight thousand dollars you only lost
00:44:41
200. yeah well I'll be yeah
00:44:47
yeah but um go ahead you know I I was there for nine years so I worked with a
00:44:52
lot of different people you know I saw you know Spade came in and Mike Myers Farley Tim you know Tim Meadows uh
00:44:59
everybody I mean it was and then we got a lot of those wild cards you're like Michael McKean and Chris Elliott you
00:45:05
know and Janine Garofalo and Sarah McKinney Spiller Mark McKinney yeah yes yes Ben Stiller who lived in the Bromley
00:45:12
as well during that time he did yeah [ __ ] bro and he got let go from the
00:45:18
show and I was doing very well in the show and I'd run into him in the elevator and go how you how are you okay you know he was you know went on the
00:45:25
guys that get fired or don't get hired for the show seem to do extremely well Jim Carrey Ben Stiller Jim Carrey was on
00:45:33
the show nobody he didn't get hired he auditioned he auditioned with us you know we should have Jim onions to talk
00:45:40
about how he didn't get it that audition yeah he destroyed I mean I just I think
00:45:45
most most people got fired from that show yeah I didn't know Farley and Sandler got fired yeah I mean the year I
00:45:51
left um Sandler and was it Farley both got fired yeah I didn't even know that for
00:45:57
[ __ ] 20 years because they're both doing so well I didn't know that there was any
00:46:03
friction I don't think there was I think the idea is that they wanted to come back and we're told no that's so weird
00:46:09
it's so weird they're both huge stars and I was kind of forced out of there too you know there wasn't much
00:46:16
we bum rushed out oh I knew I knew that was my last year that they'd have me but
00:46:21
luckily I got a sitcom for the DreamWorks the Spielberg so I had something to go to after that it was
00:46:28
called what was something it was called pushed out the door was
00:46:34
the board yeah Kevin you've done a lot of Sandler movies which one do people know you from the most do you think
00:46:41
mostly Happy Gilmore and Grandma's Boy even though he wasn't in that one what was the one where you
00:46:46
you had was it just go with it you had plastic surgery you looked for hilarious yeah that was pretty bad was that a lot
00:46:51
of makeup it was it's four hours in the makeup chair and they only used one day I did like three three or four days of
00:46:57
sitting in that chair but they only used one one day of my shooting but the most fun I had was doing Blended where we
00:47:03
shot in the South Africa oh yeah I saw that for two months so we went we went on safaris and everything was cool yeah
00:47:09
I've done like 13 Sandler films seriously 13. so you've done 10 of his
00:47:15
films every time I'm in a Sandler movie it's a terrible terrible bomb I was in Little
00:47:22
Nicky and then I was in Jack and Jill those thing only so I I should never be in
00:47:28
another Sandler film both very funny Adam doing his thing but I'm from this
00:47:33
system that deep south Uh Kevin I have a question for you oh first of all a back
00:47:38
desk I got two but bathroom attendant I was there for I thought that was one of the that sketch was [ __ ] killed if I
00:47:45
remember correctly yeah that was with Harpy Keitel it's one of my favorite sketches I I wrote on that show and you
00:47:51
know there's a thing I have about bathroom attendance it just seems so unnecessary you know to have a bathroom
00:47:57
antenna to dry your hands and to you know give you and then have candy on the counter because you know once you go to
00:48:03
the bathroom you immediately want to eat refill your supply you know I always give them 10 bucks and go if
00:48:10
anyone asks I wash my hands and he's like so I um you know I've always kind of had
00:48:16
that little uh thing about bathroom and Tennis so I finally wrote up this sketch about a
00:48:21
bathroom attendant in a very small bathroom with just one toilet too that was funny yeah and Keitel was
00:48:28
great that was good it was perfect yeah yeah and he was into it he [ __ ] loved it yeah he did and then finally comes in
00:48:36
at the end like he's my regular customer oh what a great way to get out yeah you
00:48:41
know who helped me with that was uh Mike Shoemaker oh really I think associate producers at the time or at the time I
00:48:47
think it was maybe just I don't know I'm a PA or something I'm not sure but yeah he was he kind of had
00:48:53
a lot of a lot of good little ideas for it yeah he he still works at Seth he has a big job over there uh when you and it
00:49:00
says you went to Sacred Heart these are my two last things you went to Sacred Heart and now I don't really care about
00:49:06
that but you um uh Sacred Heart as comedians because we're all like in the
00:49:11
comedy Biz that was one where I was doing gigs you know on weekends at SNL I
00:49:17
went from getting three grand a night I think I maybe got up to five a night but they go take a car I think that's
00:49:22
drivable right Kevin is it far drive yeah it's like an hour 15 from New York so they go do 45 to an hour right which
00:49:30
was kind of a tough swing because I was not really even a headliner when I got
00:49:35
hired I was pretty solid middle but you know sometimes they make a middle to 35 I go
00:49:41
get [ __ ] I would do 25 maybe but anyway so I do uh I go to I go to
00:49:47
headline I've got about 50 55 and I'm like [ __ ] this is gonna be tough but I
00:49:52
gots to do it because I'm getting the Dinero so I go all the way there yeah so
00:49:58
I go to Sacred Heart I remember this name and and they're all sitting on like a fireplace or something and I'm you
00:50:03
know schools are great they have extra money they hire you to come in but I haven't really caught fire or
00:50:09
anything I'm just like a comedian they don't really know me so I'm just like I go and they're all like
00:50:15
sitting cross-legged on the floor I remember I think I remember this right maybe 200 kids so I'm do you've you guys
00:50:22
all been here so I'm doing my [ __ ] act it's bombing ferociously and I'm
00:50:27
buzzing through it you know what I mean because I'm not doing well and I know they don't want me there but I'm like Baba and this is my big lesson in comedy
00:50:34
so I do it and I Buzz through everything but uh but I did 43 and all I had to do
00:50:40
was go like Hey where's this guy from you know not even a closer just some conversation and then get off but I
00:50:46
leave and the guy goes he wouldn't pay me he goes you did 43 you're supposed to
00:50:51
do 45. and I go and and he had me that's a contract thing because you can't say you bombed
00:50:58
because that's objective but you can say you didn't fulfill your contract so I left without a check and then oh gervitz
00:51:06
called him and yelled at him and they've finally paid me the funny part that's the thing man when you go ahead when you
00:51:11
go somewhere you know if you're traveling far you want to come home with a check one time I worked with Bill
00:51:17
Maher and Tommy Davidson up in Rochester or Buffalo New York we had to fly from New York and this little I did on a
00:51:23
little plane prop plane I got there and I got I got really sick before the show I had some kind of a stomach bug
00:51:29
and I only felt good if I laid on a cop backstage and Bill Maher did his set
00:51:36
Tommy Davidson did his set and I didn't want to go home without getting paid so I asked the stage manager if he would
00:51:42
put the cop out on the stage and I could lay in the pot and do my act for the cop on my my side and that's what I did I
00:51:49
did it and you must have killed the people I was depressed I said I'm just so depressed I gotta lay down they were
00:51:55
dying they were loving it and occasionally I try to get up and do my act and I felt bad again like I was going to throw up Suddenly I said I'm
00:52:01
depressing and I gotta lay down oh well that I started taking that cot with me to gigs that was your new one it
00:52:09
never worked as well as that when I was real [Music]
00:52:15
I once had one where I was chewing gum for some silly reason never chew gum
00:52:20
before you do stand up and and now please welcome packed house and then I bit my tongue and it was bleeding the
00:52:28
whole set I was just swallowing blood and trying to smile my teeth were kind of smeared with blood
00:52:34
sickening Kim padata pooped his pants you ever hear that one oh yeah yeah that
00:52:40
was famous a lot of comedians [ __ ] their pants poorkipadata that's all we remember his whole Act
00:52:45
did you ever have a thing where you hadn't done stand up in a while but you're on Saturday Night Live and then
00:52:51
they're paying you a lot of money and you do what you think is your whole hour but it's like 32 minutes yeah of course
00:52:58
because you're just so out of shape you go so fast and you're just like oh my God that's why I always have the guitar
00:53:04
so I could just goof around on that and you forget chunks I remember doing my act after they haven't done it for a
00:53:09
while and I'm like that that used to kill and someone goes you didn't even do the middle of it and I go huh because
00:53:15
you forget you're like how does this track and that's why it's almost like a play where you have to every every line
00:53:22
is important if it's well written you know every line makes sense and it's economized to where you have to do it a
00:53:28
certain way you can kind of Riff Off that but you have to get the basics down and if you don't lay the groundwork one
00:53:34
joke was so stupid I think I was saying there was no traffic today but everything was based on there was traffic and so I just had one word wrong
00:53:41
and then nothing worked and then later someone goes you said the opposite I go
00:53:47
I did and then and then it makes sense you go oh yeah you can't figure it out who's who's
00:53:53
critiquing you always afterward they're just there's always someone there the court stenographer going well tonight I
00:54:01
know you thought you did well a lot of it has to do with nerves too like when you're starting out you kind of do that
00:54:06
you forget stuff that's why I love doing the warm-ups on SNL because it took some of the stress away from me and anxiety
00:54:13
because I was already like I met the audience and they've seen me so I'm not coming out kind of like you know all
00:54:21
brand new and you know oh I had to do that I think I I don't know if I was assigned it from you but after you but
00:54:28
it was hard because Mars just like get out there I'm like oh [ __ ] I'm getting ready for a sketch so I gotta go up and
00:54:33
do like five or ten minutes because we were new so she would always like rough us up get out there Lauren's mad at you
00:54:41
and then walk away I go what so so uh well it's always mad I know Laura it's
00:54:48
the easiest thing the what about when Lauren would walk her on the set was I'm still lighting a glass Eddie just walk
00:54:53
around in between like during a commercial and you're like get out of here like because it's too nerve-wracking already and I know and
00:55:00
he'd say maybe kill we're doing something with uh Danny DeVito I can't remember I think Kevin was in it and
00:55:06
Lauren during the commercial space goes this has to breathe you know it was just kind of those sort of notes whatever
00:55:12
that means and he always would say this is just Lauren's sense of humor you'd walk down the hallway and still with the
00:55:18
show was another one yeah that's right yeah but but I thought it was funny I
00:55:24
would try to huddle up with him by the monitor hey Lauren what's up sometimes they go Lauren wants to talk to you right right after Gap girls and I I'd be
00:55:31
subbing to the monitor you know during the commercial and it's really loud they're playing the band he's like I
00:55:36
think the ending you could do this you know he's like it's that's how it works they give notes and they do it right
00:55:41
there while it's fresh in his brain and then you have to go wait to see if it even gets picked for air that was dress
00:55:47
rehearsal I should clarify and then they and then you've got your notes going I know what to do if it stays in the show
00:55:54
yeah you change your you know you tighten it and you go hey I made it shorter like selling it like yeah it
00:56:00
won't take up much room so you can still put it on you know and then you guys have a visit you ever go up there and
00:56:06
visit um I've just been there if I did Fallon
00:56:11
then usually I'd see Lauren or and then maybe do something on the show but yeah you just I used to go up there I used to
00:56:18
go up there to visit you know say hi to Lauren or something yeah and but you
00:56:24
know the last few times I went it was really difficult because I Lauren
00:56:30
was so busy because there was other people that were visiting him like Paul Rudd and Tom Hanks and they're all around the Monitor and it's like you
00:56:37
don't even exist you know yeah a lot of people go around that monitor I went in
00:56:42
and did a uh church lady on update this is pre-pandemic and then I walked around
00:56:49
the Monitor and I saw two people going wow that was awesome clapping and I just kept walking and they go that was Jay-Z
00:56:55
and Beyonce oh okay Will Forte uh kind of Will Forte
00:57:01
summed it up he goes uh you never feel less needed when you go
00:57:07
back to SNL now it's like you're almost invisible you know you're of no use anymore I remember
00:57:13
when I finished my high school track career and the coach was so indifferent toward me I did my last race and I kind
00:57:20
of wanted to talk about the experience okay see you later you're just sort of done and uh yeah you better squeeze dry
00:57:27
I've had a cast members email me who've left like Fred Armisen basically saying
00:57:34
well how do I deal with this the emotional hangover of it and then watching and seeing people doing your
00:57:41
job and in some cases doing it a lot better yeah you never totally get over
00:57:48
doing that show nobody does on some level you'll either have a dream about it or think about it it's too intense
00:57:54
don't you guys think when I left that show I couldn't uh
00:57:59
imagine something superseding that as far as being notable you know I always wanted I thought I
00:58:05
wonder if I'll ever do anything that's kind of as notable as that show was it and live and weird and yeah I mean doing
00:58:13
a movie and then it waits a year to come out it takes six months to get it together then you shoot and everyone's like where have you been
00:58:19
one guy you know for me weeds came along and that was something that people
00:58:24
really liked and it was a different kind of a feeling than SNL but it was still it was fulfilling for me yeah and it was
00:58:31
a various this Uber driver goes hey uh it's like about a year or two ago
00:58:37
you know this is how bad Showbiz is he goes hey uh what about that guy Chris Pratt you never see him anymore what
00:58:43
happened to him I go Chris Pratt I think he was in Jurassic world and and that other one with the [ __ ] raccoon he's
00:58:49
in those are two of the biggest movies in history he's like yeah but what else what's he hadn't been anything
00:58:55
lately I go it was this year I go what the [ __ ] have I done Jesus is like yeah we haven't done [ __ ] but people if they
00:59:01
didn't see your movie you did once you know you did one movie like I did wrong Missy then if they missed that then it's
00:59:07
such a chunk of movies they haven't seen like it's such a gap because it takes a year to get it together then you shoot
00:59:13
it then it waits to come out then you try to get another one so everyone's always like what you got any movies
00:59:19
coming out it's like the most question I get asked the most and then if you tell them uh what else to do what he's doing
00:59:27
you can make stuff up I was doing that with Mark pittowood open for me the comedian Mark Pitta in Vegas this was
00:59:32
even in like eight years ago and we would make up he had just starred in the uh sort of the Blackjack Network he
00:59:39
starred in I've had just about enough of you and he got a big Applause like he's a star nobody knows what anyone's doing
00:59:46
no one's right now I just want to drop things in deadline that I'm starting and then never do them
00:59:52
just have people go hey I already got a lot of [ __ ] going on speak you should ask that Uber driver uh where have you
00:59:58
been driving lately I haven't seen you driving anywhere no I've been all over last night they never they were together
01:00:04
I always like when you're you're jealous like if your wife sees someone on TV that guy's really handsome or whatever
01:00:10
it's Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt or something you know the the kind of thing you would say is like I I don't I don't
01:00:16
get it you know I don't get it yeah you know like the great comic like any great comedian I don't know I don't get it I
01:00:23
don't really get it you know you know what that stuff works and you go and they're like what do you mean that stuff
01:00:28
no that kind of Comedy that'll always work yeah comedy's very subjective you know I had this the stage hand and the
01:00:35
wings right before I went out hey Mr Coffee last week we had Sinbad let me tell you something that guy killed
01:00:42
hotter than any [ __ ] comedian he had the crowd in the palm of his hand and he was doing all these jokes about local
01:00:48
establishments and highways and they went [ __ ] nuts don't you love to hear that right before you go out yeah all
01:00:54
right but yeah I actually I actually followed Sinbad and I couldn't he killed so hard and I was like I'll just kind of
01:00:59
beep bop up there and I was like I was starting to get nervous going oh he's really killing because it was it was a
01:01:04
corporate gig and he knew everything about the corporation he's like according to section 42 and everyone's like wow I go God damn what has he done
01:01:13
lately I haven't seen him around you know what I mean what's he been doing you know he's just kind of disappeared you know he goes you know
01:01:19
the Guys and Dolls Network the Guys and Dolls Network he's huge he's a prime
01:01:25
time actually Dennis goes I did Star Search I'm up against Sinbad I'm doing my best [ __ ] joke Sinbad walks up
01:01:31
after me and goes you ever wear your underpants so many times it's just a rubber band four stars
01:01:37
[Music] sometimes I watch uh I watch movies with
01:01:42
my son yeah he's 14. he's like Spade I wasn't sure if you were talking to me if you had indigestion right there
01:01:48
I'm just talking to off camera to people oh go ahead well sometimes I'll watch movies with my son he's he's you know
01:01:55
he's 14. and uh we'll be watching a movie and he'll go is that guy still
01:02:00
alive huh that actor is that actor still alive I'll go yeah that's Sandler that's Adam Sandler and then uh he goes what
01:02:07
about that guy next to him I said that's me that's me you're still alive so Kevin I asked David this a couple
01:02:15
weeks ago and I said when you're watching TV and you're kind of bored you ever check the age of the actor and their net worth and he doesn't have you
01:02:22
ever checked the age of the actor or the net worth while you're watching the show I'll check the age sometimes but like
01:02:29
the last person I did that to was uh uh what's his name the guy from Jaws the
01:02:34
older uh Robert Shaw yeah Robert Shaw because I remember as a kid watching that movie he looked so old
01:02:40
and then I checked it was like 46 or something like that yeah that's in that
01:02:46
movie or 45 yeah wow and he died yeah he died in Ireland he was driving with his
01:02:52
wife and kid and he didn't feel good he got out of the car and he had a heart attack on the street at 47. whoa should
01:02:58
we end on that but so July uh that's his age put her on the side of the road
01:03:06
foreign
01:03:16
kids when they're doing the movies I said how old is that kid making all that money I looked you know how old Nemo was
01:03:24
Nemo was just a child actor yeah he was and then he and then he uh
01:03:30
but you know what there's a lot of fish in the sea Doro Dory was I don't know forget it
01:03:35
this bit's bombing um anyway Kevin I gotta jump off we've tortured we got a million we got a
01:03:42
million things we've tortured you enough it's gonna take a long time to unpack this show and figure out what happened
01:03:48
yeah we got to edit this time you can add that [ __ ] out of this man like five minutes this is a five minute show Kevin
01:03:55
we're gonna get you a copy of this hang on a second guys what is it Marcy as much she says I need to do warm-ups to
01:04:01
the show you got to get going and do warm-ups we are going to have Marcy Klein as a guest on this show for sure
01:04:08
she is the linchpin of a lot of the era stories she she was the mother uh the
01:04:15
the dog she was everything she was behind the scenes above the scenes so yeah she's got a lot of great stories
01:04:21
all right Kevin thanks buddy oh wait a minute I got I got a great story for you guys oh boy go ahead oh he hung up okay
01:04:30
that's a funny that's funny shtick hey what's up flies what's up fleas
01:04:36
what's up people that listen we want to hear from you and your dumb questions questions ask us anything anything you
01:04:42
want you can email us at fly on the wall at cadence13.com
01:04:49
hey everybody Spade here I apologize for looking
01:04:54
badass I just threw this coat on because it was 95 today and I want to look cool but
01:05:01
listen I get a lot of questions Dana and I both do I'll answer this one
01:05:07
of Norm Macdonald obviously big in the folklore of SNL and
01:05:15
how great he was and blah blah we all know about norm and a lot of the questions are any Norm Macdonald stories
01:05:21
obviously we have hundreds um one of the ones I like is
01:05:27
when we would text he's like a child you know he doesn't he doesn't he's nothing normal about him so
01:05:34
it's infuriating and he would text in the middle of nowhere he was he was a big time counselor of
01:05:40
plans one of the all-time greats uh and also with the shenanigans you have to
01:05:46
put up with so let's say he texts me David what are you doing
01:05:52
and then I answer I go hey Norm what's going on and then he waits about two weeks
01:05:57
then he goes hello David don't you like me anymore and I go Norm I I did answer you
01:06:07
what do you need do you want to meet up do you want to go eat and then about four in the morning
01:06:13
David why do you hate me and then and then it would go into this one
01:06:20
do you like money and I go yes
01:06:27
David would you like to win money Beyond Your Wildest Dreams
01:06:34
no he didn't say when he goes would you want more money than you could ever count and I go of course I would and then like four days later
01:06:42
David are you still thinking about the money and I go I am and he goes
01:06:48
if you really like it I'll tell you how you can get it
01:06:53
I go please and then I'll have three days later he says bet the under on the Chicago Blackhawks
01:07:00
in the first period first of all how much am I betting when I'm gonna win money beyond my wildest because I have
01:07:05
to bet a trillion I said I'll put a nickel on it it sounds
01:07:11
like gambling talk I don't know what it means but that he would do that and I need peanut
01:07:16
bottle but Norm was there's too many Norm stories that are too funny but he's always like this he's
01:07:22
very stiff ah you asked him any normal question he answers it like it's crazy me and him
01:07:29
and Dennis Miller did a gig right before the corona all us three crazy people
01:07:35
and he goes David when's this show I go eight he goes what
01:07:42
I go Norm there isn't a more typical show time in the world than eight if it
01:07:48
was 7 45 you could say that if it was 801 you could say you can't say today
01:07:53
and then if you go if you tell them any real news like oh my God Russia just invaded L.A goes hi Alan
01:08:01
that doesn't shock you they invaded La they dropped a bomb in L.A today you're supposed to go what that's when
01:08:08
you say what he's got it all mixed up anyway Norm's great
01:08:14
we do miss him thank you for the question [Music]
01:08:20
this has been a podcast presentation of cadence 13. please listen then rate review and follow all episodes available
01:08:27
now for free wherever you get your podcast no joke folks
01:08:32
fly on the wall has been a presentation of cadence 13 executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade Chris Corcoran of
01:08:39
cadence 13 and Charlie finan of brillstein entertainment the show's lead producers Greg Holtzman with production
01:08:45
and Engineering support from Serena Regan and Chris Basil of cadence 13.
