00:00:01
I'm gonna tell you first about this lady breakfast I will I want to hear that this is what we should be doing more interesting yeah okay I'm at breakfast
00:00:07
and I sit like this sometimes I actually turn around like a cat you're sitting on your haunches yeah like this got it and
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then and then yeah because my next bat anyway I order my food and she's sitting over here and then uh
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a whole breakfast goes fine and then when I leave we're leaving at the same time and I almost slip by the crosswalk
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so I go I almost wiped out you were supposed to save me because she's just staying I was talking to a total
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stranger but I slid almost into the street and I thought she might grab me by the Scruff and save me she couldn't
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care less and she goes oh why do you sit like that okay personal question I go Oh in there
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yeah um well my next gives me trouble so I don't and she goes oh I'm a massage
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therapist I go yes I just don't sit like that anyway nice to meet you I didn't bite
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she wanted me to go oh my God she said she's a physical therapist no massage therapist oh massage therapist I see and
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she wanted me to go oh wow this is Kismet like you know it's like Reese's people you put your chocolate my peanut butter I go
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oh cool anyway so I just sit uh sometimes I sit normal anyway oop light screen and then we get to the car and I
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feel guilty so when we walk when I'm getting my car she walks by and I go it's tougher to
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sit like that in here keep walking I went back to the same restaurant the
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next day I said how was yesterday she goes I had a haunch sitter tried to help him but he walked away I had some dope I
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had a haunch center you get haunt Sitters in here and I know how to help them but they just don't they don't pay attention some people go I think but you
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said you were a big Tipper if they go straight I saw him the other night they go oh I don't think it was him they go
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but that's actually pretty good you could sit on your knees means your knees are in pretty she did say does it hurt
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your knees and I go no the the knee is the only thing that works it's starting to go what does that mean
00:01:58
S no mine all right we don't have to advertise the world so our guest today is not Johnny is actually an easy name
00:02:05
for me he's done a lot obviously this uh big sick movie which was a huge uh not
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underground hit what would you say it was sort of well it's kind of an indie hit but it was it got a huge Splash he
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won the Academy Award he was nominated for an Academy Award for yes original screenplay he gives a lot of kudos to
00:02:24
Judd Apatow his producer and he's from Pakistan and I didn't know that he left Pakistan at 18. and then he
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moves to America and uh the the story of his journey is remarkable and uh how he
00:02:37
became this huge star in America it's a brilliant stand up a really smart writer
00:02:43
yeah sharp writer Silicon Valley yeah I was talking all about that yeah I'm working with my judge
00:02:50
specials and then how he got pump you up for uh is the movie called
00:02:57
the eternals internals I told you just decided to do that and we talk about that and we get into how it affected his
00:03:04
uh relationship with his wife it's a very interesting podcast David I've never had the experience of uh having a
00:03:10
girl say oh do you work out nothing like that not your muscles are
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too big not anything's too big it's just like hey man you're what's known as a
00:03:21
shoulder sugar so let's just get it over with and I can well sometimes it's hard because you
00:03:26
know the shirt comes off and I know a guy once this man about town with the shirt came off and then the young lady
00:03:32
with them kind of said oh look a tummy and kind of wiggled his belly I think
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I've heard that you don't look fat you just have a gut yeah you're just soft like me yeah uh when I look at you it's
00:03:45
like looking in a mirror you know that's what girls say to me I hope I don't weigh more than you
00:03:51
these are all not common I know you love it though when they pick you up kind of bridal going across this when we walk
00:03:58
into Chili's and they go let me just carry you in yeah I've seen you sometimes you're riding on their shoulders and you're running around the
00:04:05
parking lot mostly at concerts uh okay this is it Craig's gone we can't
00:04:10
you say his name ready here we go and now you're listening to Camille non-jani is our guest David okay here he is that
00:04:18
guy [Music]
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you know there's so many negatives that we could go into well I don't want to spread rumors oh my God guys this is so
00:04:32
awkward I've been here for the whole time I've been here for it the whole time do you remember when we met of
00:04:40
course I remember when we met what are you talking about I know check your diary why do you remember why do you
00:04:45
remember when we met I was kind that was a blur for me a Dan Harmon's podcast yeah you were at the comic strip I
00:04:52
didn't even know what I was doing I was invited to go there and watch and then they're like hey so I met you and a few
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others but I was reminded by my son yesterday telling him I was gonna
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interview you with David and he goes uh podcast with you conversation yeah uh he
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goes you've met him oh yeah that's right I remember meeting your son wow did uh wow he's so much nicer person than you
00:05:19
Dana was it a pleasant exchange it was very pleasant you were very very nice obviously I've been a fan of yours for a
00:05:25
long time and you were very very funny on the podcast and you were very very nice and I told everyone I know hey Dina
00:05:32
carp is actually very very nice actually are we considered nice guys I mean David David is a nice guy but there's some
00:05:40
people thought I don't think they think anymore you're snarky you know they for sure do they still remember that but
00:05:47
he's a nice guy go ahead let him talk let's see what he has to say about me well I want to say outside of since I'm
00:05:53
outside your circles yeah your guy's reputation as human beings is that Dana
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is a nice guy okay yes anyway we wanted to talk to you
00:06:07
today about um why I like this slide I have to say you are known as a nice guy
00:06:14
because well Dana always was but no one knows the real date yeah but I'm passive aggressive I have a lot of anger don't
00:06:21
don't you oh I know yeah I do because we're both crazy families and I was uh
00:06:27
not that tall I'll never say the other word I was not that tall and I was picked on they call me shrimp cocktail
00:06:32
my whole life and so shrimp tail yeah shrimp cocktail I would I was vertically
00:06:38
challenged absolutely oh I just bounced back trigger were you were you how big
00:06:44
were you like when you were 12. I'll tell you this is great by the way I want to say David you're also considered a
00:06:51
very nice guy I was just joking okay thank you now wonderful reputations among you know people outside your
00:06:58
circle I was two things to that one I'm uh like five nine and a half okay wow
00:07:06
Pakistan where the average height is much shorter I was one of the tall people oh yeah okay and then I moved to
00:07:12
America and it was like I lost three inches suddenly yeah I remember I went
00:07:18
to school and I got there early for an international student like College international student orientation and so
00:07:24
it was us and the football team and I remember standing in line behind the Bad
00:07:30
scene Bad scene the game has changed well my dad was stationed in Japan and
00:07:36
he didn't want to come back he said he was five seven and a monster and that's the way to go and he said we should all
00:07:42
pack up and go back to Japan he knew I was a [ __ ] pipsqueak and I would I
00:07:48
was lighting up like is this are you just joking are we gonna go somewhere where I'll see him tall and shrimp
00:07:54
cocktail I don't agree with that that was the worst and it was real hey go ahead come on well I'll tell you what
00:07:59
mine was I was very very small all like I had very they called me chicken
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shoulders I had weird well what would have been your give us a weight so he
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called me five nine in high school so and what would be your lightest weight were you like 130 or something or 140 ma
00:08:18
yeah probably 1 30 maybe 120 I was very very I wasn't
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I you know I I had like it was the worst I had like a pot belly and no meat or
00:08:29
else at 125.9 you have a pot belly it's not the way to go that's low lean mass man I
00:08:36
was 125 mostly head but a very big head and a very tiny body
00:08:42
for most of my um adolescents so where's the energy and
00:08:47
Drive-In sort of maybe normal comedian chip on their shoulder or Underdog
00:08:53
status that created you coming from Pakistan to America and then killing it
00:08:59
yeah in America oh that takes Drive yeah yes so it's a few things one very very
00:09:07
tough High School experience um very very not cool
00:09:13
you know this was the thing I had sort of my whole life was like I'm not cool I'm not good looking I'm not good at
00:09:20
sports but I'm smart so I knew I was smart so my all my drive that's the name
00:09:26
of my book that whole thing I do I knew Kamala was smart is the name of my book
00:09:32
no I was the pipsqueak Diaries is really my book but I I I hear what you're
00:09:37
saying so you were all these things and were you picked on it all or was that part of it or was that all of it what
00:09:43
you're saying I switched high schools my last two years of schooling so up until
00:09:48
then I was fine I was always a nerd I kind of got along with everybody I
00:09:53
wasn't Popular by any means but nobody picked on me even the bad kids were like
00:10:00
kind of cool to me and then the last few years I went to a new high school and suddenly I became the guy that was
00:10:08
picked on uh yuck because I think because I had a crush on a girl that
00:10:13
like a cool guy had a crush on oops and it just became a nightmare all I
00:10:20
wanted to do was be invisible and all I was was completely picked on
00:10:27
they came I had a friend of mine who was like you know one of you first transferred to a new school you're sort
00:10:34
of like oh nobody oh yeah your nose terrifying who you can have lunch with yeah but I was also like oh I could be
00:10:40
cool at this school oh you got a new start oh a fresh start they don't know exactly they don't know and so I went in
00:10:47
I sort of had developed a new cool walk I was like they're not gonna smart
00:10:53
was it bouncy on the heels can you paint a picture what a cool walk is and it's sort of strutting yeah I don't care
00:10:59
walking into every room dick first you know yeah yeah you know I needed a PR person
00:11:06
because when I I would have hired one because I here's my thing and I'll let you talk in a minute but I could you
00:11:13
afford five grand a month back back in those days God dang it's worse than that now it's so sickening don't even let
00:11:20
America know what we do it's so gross and embarrassing keep it to yourself we'll get into money
00:11:27
later because I want to know something you're not rich I look up people and I want to see what you got Dana I was a
00:11:33
little skateboarder in Arizona I was smart like this guy and uh
00:11:39
and I was more pipsqueak but I had white hair I had some superpowers we'll get to the eternals in a minute I had some
00:11:45
superpowers because I had long white blonde hair not extensions they were
00:11:50
real and then I had a thick thick hair cool shorts I was tanned back then
00:11:55
obviously that's going away but and I had two broken arms when I got to school from skateboarding and empty pools so I
00:12:03
had I would add all this cool stuff double cast on yeah double splints my dad double splits my stepdad wouldn't
00:12:09
give me a cast because he goes let's let's wait and see I go they're both broken what are we waiting for he was a
00:12:15
little he was drunk so he was a doctor also so I um I I went to school when I was a nerd at my school I was like a
00:12:21
math guy and a spelling bee guy and a chess guy and no one cared about me I get to my high school and like he's
00:12:27
saying new PR campaign because my brother was cool and all his cheerleader
00:12:32
friends liked me and then the word spread like wildfire Spade's cool and everyone's a bicycle is like oh wait no
00:12:38
he's not no he's not it was too late it was five schools merged and mine was a minority they couldn't get the word out
00:12:43
and was getting stomped on and then I was like I'd walk by and go hey old friends
00:12:49
um how's math going in the flash guards nerds anyway new friends let's go to the assembly and so I transitioned to a cool
00:12:57
group yeah you pulled off something that's almost impossible almost and believe me everyone was baffled teachers
00:13:03
principals nobody none of my friends had sex nobody we're on the cross country team and the
00:13:10
track team nobody had sex yeah but most of mine still haven't and they would be in their mid-40s it's
00:13:18
like calling Steve Carell you're like you're on Facebook with him going you guys I'm just lucky I'm an international
00:13:24
star now or I'd be in your same boat yeah exactly all you have to do yeah
00:13:29
that's a one big jump you got to make that kind of become kind of famous so you Spade you must have been funny then
00:13:35
already right well it was back when uh the Great Looks came later
00:13:41
um it went back when you had to just Mumble jokes and just try to sneak
00:13:46
things in because no one's really listening and I don't really want gonna try to tell a joke and I'm not ready so
00:13:52
it was a lot of throwaways and things and then it got because you have to get some
00:13:58
girl's attention you have to get guys attention no one is rushing to hang out and so that's just like what a lot of us
00:14:05
do you just sort of work on that part because you don't have the ease of just
00:14:10
being a good looking guy or girl where everything comes to you and you don't need to work on that at all so but but
00:14:16
then you started at some point as you became cooler you were probably known as like the funny guy at some point people
00:14:21
started listening at some point we did talent shows and I would try old SNL sketches and try to write stuff with my
00:14:28
buddies only to get it only because it was I wasn't on football I wasn't on track I wasn't doing anything cool or
00:14:34
fun and so we had two days of talent show you weren't on the football team I was not on any of the things
00:14:40
I was not I did try out and I got [ __ ] smeared at there used to be an old term for that and uh and then the
00:14:48
coach pulled me aside like Lucas that old movie and he said I don't think this is for you but hey man I was on D
00:14:54
basketball you guys are too young for that there was Varsity junior varsity soft frosh and then D and I'm not
00:15:01
talking about our Center who controlled the paint was five three not a joke control the paint he controlled the
00:15:08
paint at five three control the pain most of us how high was that was a basket the basket was ten and it was a
00:15:16
hurricane effort to hit the rim you guys didn't even like a play school Rim well
00:15:21
at home Nerf at home we had a nine foot rim and I'd practice in the driveway
00:15:27
thought I was really good thought I was really cool and then I get to the real thing it's a foot higher [ __ ] I was
00:15:33
[ __ ] man um what about your experience in high school yeah we have to talk to him a
00:15:39
little bit a little bit let's but I I like hearing that David I'm sort of co-hosting today
00:15:44
what was your experience when did you go I think I'm funny well I want to hear yours Dana so all of high school I was I
00:15:52
really do all of high school I was basically uh it was really bad there was
00:15:59
one so when I first got there I thought I could be cool and my big mistake was
00:16:04
right in the beginning I started talking to some of the cool kids and they thought I was cool and then at some
00:16:10
point very early on week three they figured out I wasn't cool I don't know what happened I think what data did they
00:16:16
get just something just because you can't hide it forever you can't hide it and I think my previous question
00:16:23
APB out or something being like hey just so you know this guys just seemed to be something it's not it's like a Netflix
00:16:30
movie hey you guys are triggering me a little bit I just want to be honest about the fear I had in high school and
00:16:37
I'm getting a little triggered just a little warning sign but yeah just this idea of being cool and do people like me
00:16:43
yeah and I try to contact lenses so I didn't have glasses so I don't know how they
00:16:49
found out but they found out so now the problem was they all I know I'm very lame one of my guys one
00:16:58
of my friends who was sort of a cool friend he had become cool you know because he had become like hot over
00:17:04
summer so he was a nerd came back after a summer suddenly he was very handsome he got cool wow that's very rare help
00:17:13
him with math homework and uh so he knew where I lived and then one day he took
00:17:18
all the other cool kids brought him over to my house and they threw eggs at my house wait yeah I thought he was going
00:17:25
to come over and give you a party what a turn coat no oh my God he used Ben
00:17:31
Arnold to gain permanent membership into the cool cross oh that you know that would do it though yeah I did that
00:17:38
really helped him out you know that Big Nerd who uh with the weird walk I know where he lives I got his 20. I I
00:17:46
probably David did this I don't know about you but I would get an enforcer his name was Steve Lee and in fourth grade I befriended him and he was my
00:17:53
guard and we had a club with one other kid and we call it the Great Club and
00:17:59
everyone wanted to be in the Great Club then they say how do we get in the Great Club we've got to be great it was only three of us great Steve Lee would beat
00:18:06
up anyone who would attack me that was my strategy because I was then I was 4-4 maybe 68 pounds to manipulate Steve Lee
00:18:15
well I don't know uh funniness or whatever I smoked uh I stole cigarettes
00:18:20
and smoked I had fist fights I shoplifted I went through all that like actually cool
00:18:27
um you know what here I'm gonna ask you guys a question because I know our listeners are fascinated you could have
00:18:32
a cool fourth grade fifth grade a little dormant cool Sixth and then seventh and
00:18:39
eighth a little insecure and then in high school it was all insecure because I'd never seen the cheerleaders were
00:18:47
like Gods Marianne Silvestri was the most Untouchable stunning uh teenage
00:18:54
girl and so it was just nervousness at that point right right suddenly we're like children
00:19:00
we look at us we've ever looked in our life and the divorce that has kept our
00:19:08
species alive for thousands of years is coursing through us it's so unfair yeah
00:19:15
suddenly this biological need to procreate is given to us when we're like
00:19:20
when we look our words and feel the worst about it you're really putting it politely it was like boner Junction at
00:19:26
my I mean I was in school and I could not I couldn't I couldn't focus on literally anything I'm just like staring
00:19:33
you know I mean this is like a stand-up bit did you ever think where the teacher would ask you to go up to the chalkboard and you're already Full Throttle you're
00:19:40
like well we didn't have mixed classes we had boys classes no so not as many so
00:19:47
that was okay but you can still Daydream and then it's harder to explain I was just thinking about girls dudes you know
00:19:54
chicks while you're sweating they're all sticky figure porn with your pencil porn
00:20:00
like today what if you're on your phone on your desk and you're just looking at monster you know mother daughter step
00:20:07
daughter whatever would have well that would have been like it's too much getting porn at that age was such a
00:20:13
quest you have to go on like side missions and stuff to be able to worth it worth it yeah Spiegel cattle my high
00:20:20
school was I was not I did not think I was funny all through High School it wasn't until I got to college in the U.S
00:20:27
that everybody was subtly very nice to me and kind to me and they were sort of interested in me because I was Pakistani
00:20:33
and there were really no there was one other Pakistani you were like E.T everyone what was your accent like when
00:20:38
you first came over compared to now was it you could you talk you could kind of was it heavier or what or yeah you
00:20:45
always bilingual yeah I mean I always was bilingual but I had a thicker accent
00:20:51
a thicker Pakistani accent um and so they were really interested and suddenly I was funny I don't know
00:20:58
what happened but I remember at one point talking to a friend of mine and
00:21:04
some doing some riff about Aladdin's sword I don't remember what it was but we're laughing so hard she couldn't
00:21:10
speak and I was like oh wow maybe this is what I have and then people started
00:21:15
calling me like you know you're I'm this of the group on this of the group and you're the funny one of the group oh
00:21:20
that's interesting you're gonna get a little moniker so it kind of makes you believe it right yeah and suddenly I was
00:21:25
like oh I have a personality I'm a person and my thing my only thing is that I'm funny and so that became the
00:21:32
most important thing in the world was being funny was because you know what
00:21:38
Dana where I think I would say you two guys were pretty smart growing up and it's not a panty dropper like when
00:21:44
you're growing up funny that's because he was smart obviously this dude's smart and it wasn't really turning heads to be
00:21:50
smart especially probably people are smarter Pakistan than over here so he comes over here there was always someone
00:21:57
smarter and also it wasn't social currency yeah and then you get to dumb America [Laughter]
00:22:03
but even though you talk funny
00:22:12
[Music] did you think when you were over there like was anyone doing stand-up I mean
00:22:18
this has got to be Beyond Wildest Dreams go to America then be be a stand-up and
00:22:24
then be funny enough to do it and then jump to millionaire highest tax bracket
00:22:29
go or second highest where you guys are well
00:22:36
well it's related to David so you're growing up at 8 to 18. you're you've got impressions of America you're watching
00:22:42
America on TV and then you come to America and you do everything David just said but I what was the difference
00:22:48
between your impressions of America and when you got here because you saw it through uh television Right Stuff
00:22:55
television and movies big fan of movies and TV really you know I was a very
00:23:01
quiet shy kid so I spent most of my time watching movies watching TV playing video games so my impression of America
00:23:07
was what you project to the rest of the world which is for the most part New York and L.A when I moved to America I
00:23:15
moved to Iowa no is it that's even funnier okay a whole different America
00:23:21
yeah when I landed I was like wait where are all the buildings what happened
00:23:27
why are there pigs everywhere um so weird I was beautiful by the way
00:23:33
but of all places beautiful now looking back I'm very happy I went to a place
00:23:38
like Iowa where I was novel and it wasn't so packed it wasn't overwhelming
00:23:43
I I moved to a town of 9 000 people in the middle of Iowa that's a good middle step it is and so it helped me sort of
00:23:52
you know acclimate to speaking English all the time and shaking hands with girls and all that kind of stuff and
00:23:58
just how to talk to girls I didn't know how to talk to girls not just even you know I don't mean romantically I mean
00:24:04
just talking to a girl sure nerve-wracking in the beginning so so it was America was very very different for
00:24:11
me um in Pakistan to answer your question Spade um the there was not
00:24:18
stand up the way we have it here now they do India actually has a huge stand-up scene in English
00:24:25
um there were mostly people there was one stand up I really loved and he did
00:24:30
Impressions and he was very very good his name was moinakhtar he has since passed away
00:24:36
um but I follow him on Instagram I would not I would not say I was a fan of
00:24:42
Comedy or stand-up comedy until I got to college and that's sorry about really fell in love what what Impressions would
00:24:48
that gentleman do you just uh Pakistani impressionist would he do an American no
00:24:54
Pakistani celebrities all celebrities okay yeah like a Pakistani cricketer and
00:24:59
stuff like that Pakistani cricketer hilarious how funny did you see that and think
00:25:05
the way I used to watch like Johnny Carson and see The Comedians and you just go it's so fun but it seems too
00:25:10
far-fetched for you to do it but it's just fun to watch right oh it was impossible thinking that I could be in
00:25:16
the biz I mean I honestly still kind of can't believe it because yeah for me it's been you know a million tiny little
00:25:22
steps to it and your goals changes true get more opportunities you know there wasn't a point where I was like someday
00:25:29
I want to be on a podcast with David Spade and Dana Carvey you know I couldn't have I couldn't have imagined
00:25:35
that um and so no being being in this business was really really not even a
00:25:41
dream I dared to dream I think gradual Fame is a is a kind of a gift it's your
00:25:47
only chance of coming out somewhat sane you guys both didn't have that you guys
00:25:53
became famous overnight uh no it took it took I took me probably longer than Dana
00:25:59
but 10 10 10 years for me for my first set to getting get in on SNL you know
00:26:06
being first show for me getting known has been Tiny Steps you know it wasn't I
00:26:11
didn't go from open mics to then suddenly doing something that everybody sees I had like small parts and things
00:26:18
slightly bigger parts and things slightly bigger parts and smaller things so my becoming known has been like a lot
00:26:26
of Tiny Steps for you Dana I assume when you were doing stand up you weren't really famous and then suddenly you end
00:26:33
up on SNL and now there's a day bigger jump yeah become famous yes pretty
00:26:39
pretty quickly because I I you know it was a smaller cast and I had a couple good characters the first year so yeah
00:26:46
it uh a really bizarre art thing that's happened to all of us when you first
00:26:51
first time someone wants your autograph back then that wasn't pictures it's like wow you know who I am I miss those days
00:26:57
uh yeah I was at a mall with my mom recently and someone asked for a selfie and my mom
00:27:04
laughed so hard she couldn't speak she was like why do they want yourself what
00:27:10
I mean a picture of you two together you're a star or what it was she doesn't it doesn't make any sense to her
00:27:17
so yeah Dana you and and Spade you had a similar thing I assume where you went
00:27:23
from not being down to being very known overnight well even when I got an SNL it wasn't the Dana overnight success uh
00:27:30
Dana hit hard starting in the cold opening forecast yeah smaller cast I got
00:27:36
stand up and then I was sort of known around town in Arizona and Scottsdale and that was a sort of Fame you know
00:27:42
that was a something of course and that's probably what you did and then uh going and getting on like
00:27:49
at The Improv in La that was I was in LA which counts as being famous in Arizona because someone actually broke out and
00:27:56
said I know it's like saying I'm gonna go to the US if you actually do do that
00:28:01
you're already way ahead of the game if you're called for civilians outside LA and you're a comedy store regular or an
00:28:08
improper regular you are kind of a celebrity back home yeah I mean I moved from Chicago I was in Chicago and my
00:28:14
comedian friends would move to LA in my head just by moving to La they were famous exactly just just that part Dana
00:28:21
forget getting on they don't know that I'm eating you know I go to Ralph's and I try to buy one of those little
00:28:26
rotisserie chickens and non in the alley they don't know that it's like The Walking Dead But I get two spots a week
00:28:33
and I make 28 a spot or something and that's it so I got to figure out a way to live and then I got on the Improv
00:28:40
yeah then I get then I do a little bit of road work then I got an HBO young comedian special that was a big jump
00:28:45
because it was on HBO so can I ask you real when you were doing these spots in La at The Improv were you like crushing
00:28:53
no no I just I look back and the lineups were like Leno Paul Riser Uh Kevin
00:29:01
Nealon where they were already really they were big Headliners but that's the lineup I
00:29:07
mean I couldn't believe I go these are the guys I've seen on Johnny Carson and they're all in one spot and they're
00:29:13
going everyone's doing 20. and they said why don't you they passed me Comedy Store said no but improv passed me just
00:29:20
because I was 20 I looked 15 and I had long blonde hair and they said looking back they just didn't have one of me you
00:29:26
know I didn't look like I'm from New York I didn't look like I wasn't that tall I just didn't look like a comedian so they said why don't
00:29:32
you host or do a set like at midnight and that was it and it's just to get out
00:29:37
there and get warmed up and watch people so gradual Fame yeah I mean I want to get back to you but I just got then I
00:29:43
got a movie I had a small part and that was a big deal oh it was a police academy four which
00:29:49
was as a skateboarding guy as a skateboarder yeah and the reason the reason I got that I did not know how to
00:29:56
act and I was blowing auditions and then they said I got there and they said do you have the script I said oh
00:30:02
they didn't send it and they go oh shoot they were supposed to we don't have one here
00:30:07
uh but you're already here um should he go and they go well do you
00:30:13
just if you were a skateboarder and you and the cops are coming around can you just say some stuff aren't you a
00:30:18
comedian and I just start making up [ __ ] and they go yeah let's use him and if I
00:30:24
would have had a script I wouldn't know how to look at it they would know right away I don't know how to cold read and I got lucky exactly that feeling
00:30:31
it's like a joy when they're like there's no script can you just improvise thank you so much right when that movie
00:30:38
came out was your scene funny in it not particularly as my dad said but it
00:30:45
was I was in a movie you know and the movie didn't even do that well but it was a it was a chain of movies or whatever they call a series where the
00:30:51
fourth one and a franchise I guess back then and it had been pretty watered down at that point but Sharon Stone was in it
00:30:58
and she blew up after that and so it was like a legit kind of movie I just was
00:31:04
just window dressing did a few lines here and there and skateboarded Tony Hawk was my
00:31:09
stunt double um and then if you were like 23 or so I was 21. wait wait wait can you talk was
00:31:18
your stunt double yeah another just super cool dude that I just I knew from skateboard magazines from Arizona so all
00:31:25
his Bones Brigade was my my little gang I ran around with so in the movie so I
00:31:30
got to see them and then uh watch that now I don't like the most legendary skateboarder of all time the most iconic
00:31:37
skateboarder of all time was your stunt double in your first movie right and you're 21. and he wasn't that big of a
00:31:43
deal I mean we're about the same age he he was probably a little younger and Chris Miller another guy Mike McGill all
00:31:50
the big skaters so but he was taller than me and he rode goofy foot no I rode goofy he wrote the different way so we
00:31:55
had two stunt doubles for me plus I could skate and so they would just intercut anyway boring but she's I was a
00:32:02
busboy at Holiday Inn at 21. but then I got on that HBO thing and then Marcy Klein and everyone at SNL saw that and
00:32:09
then I got but I I came on as a writer and I didn't really know I wasn't supposed to be a performer so I was as
00:32:14
Lauren said the other day Spade I knew what we were doing with you you were going to be on the bench for a while
00:32:19
remember when he said that Dana I was like oh he'd say David's behind you David's always ready everything happens
00:32:25
he's always because he David would sit behind me and read through it SNL and he was always there he's ready with my Dana
00:32:32
Voodoo he's ready to go whatever if you falter um he'll like take your place meanwhile
00:32:39
I do not say that I know but Dana's like a super comedian with Impressions and plays
00:32:45
every big person and he's looking at me like this guy doesn't scare me I'm just like mumbling jokes always funny but it
00:32:50
worked out back to our guests yeah let's go back to him for a little bit and then I'll come back to you honestly I think
00:32:57
that your lives are much more interesting than my lives so so sorry sorry it's Faith so I wanna
00:33:05
I'm curious unless you guys have already talked about this on the box no it's boring if you haven't talked about it
00:33:11
then I want to ask you how did you get the so you gotta you got you gotta do like five minutes on one of the young
00:33:17
comedian specials yeah with other people and who and how did you get that and who was on it with you because those are
00:33:24
crazy lineups Rob Schneider was on it with me um we got we got plucked to audition off
00:33:30
of that you need some heat like that we had management that had SNL people we had so you I'm in the vicinity of it
00:33:37
they had Dana I live with Dana I lived in his house here Dennis Miller and I
00:33:43
were just kind of fledging on SNL We though I had done stand up with Rob Schneider for years he was my opener and
00:33:51
then when I met David when before I got on SNL so they were in The Ether and they came in like freaking Frack it was
00:33:58
Rob Schneider David Spade they always were just a notch funnier than their
00:34:03
peers at the time and so they matriculated to SNL Dennis and I recommended them and then they
00:34:09
auditioned well and they ended up Bean Legends those who were big help and then um then I got on but took me a
00:34:15
while to get on which got me back to the fame thing it was exciting but it was infuriating and frustrating but then it
00:34:23
then came movies and stuff yeah um didn't did not do that well but like
00:34:30
like I was watching your monologue on SNL which uh listen and that was a tough crowd no I'm kidding you did great but
00:34:37
uh I know you've gotten so much praise for it I had to stop for it weird that's you
00:34:43
no that wasn't even your fault I was jealous of it I watched it man I I've
00:34:48
hosted three times I never had a monologue like that yeah well formed what are you saying what are
00:34:54
your negatives you get from people when they try to fake compliment you well for me it was a with stand up you know if
00:34:59
you don't do well you always said they were weird that's so great right when you get off yeah you think you killed
00:35:05
and you go [ __ ] them you go or they say to you how did you think it went how did you how did you feel about it I
00:35:13
always could tell if I had a good set of acid and people said that was good that was a bad set if they said that was
00:35:19
funny that was a good set I love it and if they switch their compliment a
00:35:24
compliment also Dana is when you say uh if you don't like their act but they do good you go you killed
00:35:31
you don't say anything that's a that's a polite way of saying you're hacky garbage when they they and
00:35:39
I've said this before when they switch out their compliment the last second like they're starting to say great and they switch to good oh that was good
00:35:46
good [ __ ] just go good don't imagine their head is if he's gonna know I'm
00:35:53
lying if I say good maybe he'll buy it well can I ask you a question how did you deal so you you come to America you
00:35:59
go to college you're going to try how did you deal with the early bombs that we all have how resilient were you or
00:36:05
did you ever bomb I was very lucky that the first time I did stand up was on campus my senior year I did a set my
00:36:13
first semester uh of the my final year and then the second semester and the first set I ever did in my life I did 25
00:36:19
minutes I had no idea that that's what you do that's crazy
00:36:24
writing for a few months and I tried all these jokes for 25 minutes in this coffee shop and it was probably like 100
00:36:30
people crammed into a tiny room and it was a bunch of my friends and I to this day a one of the best sets I've ever had
00:36:37
that's what Dane always says Dana says your first set sometimes is your best usually the very first because you you
00:36:44
psychologically have a free pass it's like when the quarterback gets hurt and the other guy comes in well there's no pressure on me I hope I do okay so the
00:36:51
first set like did they announce you as that's my it's his first time doing stand-up everybody it was everybody's
00:36:57
first time except oh okay I who had done it before so it was all college kids just a thing on campus we all did 20 25
00:37:05
minutes that's too much dude I wish I had a VHS of that I have a
00:37:12
picture from it I'm wearing this huge sweater um comedy sweater we all have hilarious
00:37:18
sweater you gotta have a funny sweater I really really genuinely objectively
00:37:24
crushed like I really sort of became right after that kind of a little bit
00:37:30
famous on campus they were like wow you're that guy yeah that means so much
00:37:35
suddenly and then I did it again the second semester and now people were like excited to see me a bunch of other
00:37:41
people had also performed on it but they were like oh Camille's going to go up again and then the second time I I
00:37:47
killed again not as hard as the first time but still very very good and so after that suddenly a little bit on
00:37:54
campus I was like one of the guys that that people knew and then I moved to Chicago and I just looked up in the
00:38:00
reader which is a local newspaper just opened mics and I was very lucky
00:38:06
um Dana and that I did not have a bomb until maybe my 25th or 30th set I didn't
00:38:14
come for quite a long time the first few months how was uh how to feel it felt it
00:38:21
felt kind of great I think I would have needed that confidence because I had no
00:38:26
I had I was so insecure at that time that if I'd bombed the first time I would have never done stand up again and
00:38:32
if I bombed the fifth time maybe I never would have done stand up again which is what's always impressive to me you know
00:38:38
when you start doing open mics and you meet Comedians and you hang out and they've been doing it for a couple of years and I'm like you have never once
00:38:45
done well I am so impressed that you I know that
00:38:50
it's a tenacity yeah you're not even funny at all no you're
00:38:56
not funny your inner fortitude is so [ __ ] impressive to me you should look like a soldier what are you doing
00:39:03
so your bits aren't working no and you keep doing the bits yeah like you gotta
00:39:09
call the her like there's something there and you want to shake and go there's nothing there there's nothing there but you know sometimes there are
00:39:15
people that you see there's nothing there and you they're like those comedian is that other comedians make
00:39:21
fun of that's what happened with Hannibal Burrows you guys know Hannibal oh yeah he got funny overnight he was
00:39:27
not funny he was one of the guys that people where we would be like [ __ ] Hannibal here again I remember a friend of mine called me
00:39:35
and was like have you seen Hannibal recently and I was like No And they're like funny now like what do you mean
00:39:41
Hannibal Hannibal Buress is funny he cracked the code he figured it out I mean maybe that's what it takes he
00:39:47
didn't like slowly get funny he was not funny funny Jesus like a 12th grade
00:39:53
that's so great I would say I bombed I did a guest set at Zanies you guys know zany's in
00:40:00
Chicago yeah uh I was uh it was me John Roy who's a
00:40:05
very funny comedian also from Chicago I don't know if you guys know him and then I forget who the headliner was
00:40:12
um but that was my first time I didn't do well and it really felt it was an awful feeling because
00:40:18
I didn't understand what happened I was like these are the same jokes these jokes do well and that said I had like a
00:40:23
10 minute set and I was like I'm gonna start strong and stronger and then you have the bits in the middle that are not
00:40:28
quite as strong well my first joke didn't do that well so then I pulled my closer up which oh no well so now I'm
00:40:36
out there I got six minutes still left and all my B jobs and that's it yeah
00:40:41
that's so funny when you scramble like that and you get spooked like a horse and you start going what is going on here and you jump ahead and mixing up
00:40:48
your jokes then you go wait did I even do this one because now it's out of order Chris Rock used to go Spade
00:40:53
tonight just to Shake It Up open with your clothes or I go shut the
00:40:59
[ __ ] up I'm not opening with myself and then you try to bomb yeah and then
00:41:05
he goes then where are you what are you gonna do where are you headed I go [ __ ] don't scare me dude I've been doing this
00:41:11
too long I don't do that [ __ ] I don't want to be I don't want to put myself in a position like that why would I do that
00:41:17
I want to just what I do is I pack it with jokes at work and then put one new
00:41:22
one in the middle and then [ __ ] baby it after that with stuff hopefully they'll get me out of that hole if it doesn't work exactly I mean that's how I
00:41:29
would always like the way I planned my set was always I really put a lot of
00:41:35
thought into it some people don't do that some people just go up and like I'll do whatever I feel like doing later
00:41:41
once I got I would say um really experience with stand up and
00:41:46
started feeling really confident when I moved to New York I really there were a couple of years in New York where I was
00:41:52
like I was really feeling at the top of my game then the challenge to myself was
00:41:57
how long can I be up there without doing a joke at all so that was the challenge everything oh just off top of your head
00:42:04
was IT Crowd work or just your making up stuff making up stuff sometimes crowd whatever it was I was like the goal is
00:42:10
to go up there and when I step on stage have no idea what the first words out of my wow it is terrifying I like that
00:42:17
that's my favorite I've done it but it's I will go or I'll have like two new
00:42:23
things and go I'm gonna I'm gonna open with these two get a feel for the crowd and then just go into my ACT but I just am so sick of my ACT I will have to
00:42:30
start with a couple new bits and sometimes you stumble into a winner well for me the good thing was if I'm doing
00:42:36
well just riffing I'm like wait till they gotta load of the [ __ ] I've been writing
00:42:41
yeah you know and if it's not going well no problem I haven't done any of my
00:42:47
jokes yet for me I think the fear was what if I do my first joke and it doesn't do well where do I go so that for me was what
00:42:55
made me comfortable and safe on stage was not doing any jokes for the for as long as I could go without doing any
00:43:01
jokes yeah I still don't have any jokes I I can't write a joke I mean I just I
00:43:06
have like three jokes I love them but I just can't come up with jokes like jokes
00:43:12
that's all Rhythm and all attitude you're such a funny person you do jokes and then you impression with your every
00:43:19
impression you have is is woven in with jokes so it's a combo hit it's like it sounds like somebody oh man you're
00:43:25
saying something funny man megatore Mega T that's a joke oh okay oh you saw that
00:43:31
Jesus I'm gonna Cry of course I did that was a pretty good that's a pretty good bit about the frustration of parenting
00:43:39
uh in that style of parenting with a it was like as if a kid a little kid's like a 100 year old man you have to take care
00:43:45
of or something like that yeah and it might be a toy or I'm gonna be [ __ ] yeah
00:43:52
you sell action figure and figures with just a little bit
00:44:03
[Music] we're halfway through um and I want to say that Emily and I
00:44:11
re-watched that uh not too long ago because she's such a huge fan of that that
00:44:16
I love her she you know I met a comedy nerd that we
00:44:22
that's how we fell in love she like used to record SNL she didn't have a VCR so
00:44:28
she would record it on an audio tape and she would just listen to the audio of
00:44:34
SNL sketches like wow is she a hundred no when did you get together a 2007 or
00:44:42
when did you 2006 that's right okay so basically you have a pre-fame
00:44:48
pre-money for you wife yes and when we first moved just I mean
00:44:55
nice to get made at a comedy show and I was like you know Chicago famous at the time which yeah famous
00:45:01
but I was good enough on stage I was like killing on stage enough that you know if I did a show she was at the show
00:45:07
I was feeling pretty good about my chances um but no money lived like you know I
00:45:13
had a mattress on the floor it was and then when we moved solid gold mattress
00:45:19
David had a lot of mattresses what does that mean well before you made it
00:45:24
remember the story in New York you just back to L.A when I lived in New York
00:45:29
Lauren wouldn't pick us up in the summer and he would make us wait and so you'd have to literally get out of your whole
00:45:34
apartment and move back to LA and then a month later they go we can't get a hold of me's in Amagansett we we will he'll
00:45:42
decide in another month I'm like they don't have any phones no one could find him so when I if I got picked up the
00:45:48
you'd have to move it but I'd have to move all again and there wasn't Uber or delivery so I drag a mattress up some
00:45:53
stairs I felt so confident I had an interior decorator after the first season God damn you asked I'm gonna be
00:45:59
here for a while no I'm kidding or Dana you're you were like a hit right from the beginning yeah well the church lady
00:46:06
was on the first show I can't imagine that you you're like
00:46:12
suddenly one day you're just a person and the next day like famous in the country I before I went out there
00:46:19
because I do I'd never done sketch comedy I was so nervous he had the comedy look at this guy I never done
00:46:26
sketch comedy but I I was a sketch comedy person by heart but doing stand-up so I think Church late as part
00:46:31
of my stand-up but I was so [ __ ] nervous the first show that I was just
00:46:37
swearing at myself in the mirror [ __ ] [ __ ] you know and then afterwards I was so emotional how well it went that I was
00:46:44
just basically tearing up quite a bit it was a big ride obviously you're
00:46:50
obviously very nervous you're doing this thing um and you go to dress and then and and
00:46:57
it it kills a dress church lady was the final sketch at dress as you know that's
00:47:02
the graveyard spot like this isn't probably gonna work it's a two-hour dresses
00:47:07
and it's moved up to the first sketch until the air shows I just I'm sorry I
00:47:13
just want to know every step of how you're like negotiating this you go out are you nervous address you're very
00:47:19
nervous at dressed this is gonna go oh yeah yes and at what point do you get your first laugh and you feel like okay
00:47:27
wow this is something or do you not feel that really no there was an exact moment
00:47:32
because I'm out there with Victoria Jackson I'm very scared and I'm doing the interrogating thing and well we
00:47:38
don't do that well church lady I did this and we didn't do that and she goes yeah but I did this and then I said
00:47:45
well isn't that special huge laugh wow already
00:47:51
catchphrase already but until I landed that I didn't I was just wanting to
00:47:57
articulate just please don't blow it you know and then once I landed that I connected to the 10 000 hours in the
00:48:03
clubs I was like oh I'm off the races did you know when did you know this is
00:48:08
the big line I gotta land or were you surprised that at the reaction to God I
00:48:13
had done it in the clubs and it would evolved from an improv it's the ultimate patronizing put down when someone's
00:48:20
being sincere man it did become a catchphrase I had it in the clubs and the church lady would work in the clubs
00:48:25
it was me interviewing myself or dealing with hecklers we don't quite know what
00:48:31
to say do we you know that thing I knew that attitude worked uh but I'd never done it with the dress and never done it
00:48:37
so it was out of body I I don't know if you've had experiences like that maybe getting nominated for an Academy Award
00:48:43
for the screenplay or getting cast on Silicon Valley let's let's go back to when you were shocked and amazed at your
00:48:51
success was there any moment or was it just gradual when did you start getting recognized
00:48:57
it was Silicon Valley your first national like thing that people
00:49:02
knew you from no the first thing I would say that uh I did a sketch on Portlandia
00:49:10
season one of Portlandia love that show Fred Armisen Fred Armisen Carrie
00:49:15
Brownstein very very funny yeah and um the first thing I'd ever done on TV
00:49:21
actually uh was I had two lines on SNL I
00:49:27
read that you tell they needed a brown guy and I was doing something sorry they
00:49:34
did I mean the casting breakdown they still do they still do they got plenty
00:49:40
of this flavor um they I was doing well in New York and
00:49:45
one of the writers for SNL emailed me and was like hey we need someone to just come in and do three
00:49:52
lines for this sketch and I said yes of course [ __ ] yeah under five so I like hang out with the extras all day you
00:49:58
know we hang out in the theater that Conan was taping in at the time um and I have three lines and a dress
00:50:06
um it's it's an episode with James Franco and it's James Franco and Sudeikis are at the you know they're
00:50:13
like at the Deus and we're a bunch of reporters asking questions it's the press conference and Sudeikis messed up
00:50:19
his line oh no through me so much and dressed that I messed up my line I just
00:50:25
didn't know I just literally just stumbled my words so then suddenly when I get the script
00:50:31
for the um or air now I have two lines instead of lines and I remember it was
00:50:39
really cool we're starting the sketch I haven't I don't know sudakis at all he's there while we're about to do the live when he
00:50:46
looks at me and he says I'm sorry he like apologized to me oh that's cool meant a lot to me I remember Will Forte
00:50:53
was like really really cool to me he he good this guy's never been on TV he's
00:51:00
got live he's got two lines live so he went out of his way to like be kind to
00:51:06
me and I've told him that and he doesn't remember it I was like that's great sounds exactly like him yeah cool
00:51:11
Hammond was very nice to me very sweet yeah um by the way it's hard to do that when
00:51:17
you're in the in the heat of a show and you're a cast member to think enough to go out of the way because you're sewing
00:51:23
your own head terrified yourself you know yeah and I remember Kristen Wiig when you were rehearsing laughed really
00:51:29
hard at me and said that was really funny so I I feel like maybe they could tell oh this is another performer this
00:51:37
is a very big deal for him I will just touch that they all went out of their way to make me feel confident and
00:51:43
comfortable and well I like this story he's like then Lauren came out and they sang for he's the jolly good fellow and They Carried me around yeah yeah that's
00:51:50
right and then Lauren for some reason blacklisted me from Hollywood
00:51:56
um so basically like why don't we jump to that because you go through Silicon Valley but but the thing that people
00:52:02
really knew me from was Portlandia I did this yeah so that was your first thing yeah that was my first thing and that
00:52:08
was an improvised sketch we improvised for like two hours and they cut it down John prizel the director into a four
00:52:14
minute sketch three-minute sketch and it came out really funny um Fred's really funny Carrie is really
00:52:21
funny and it just came out really funny and that show the first season was kind
00:52:26
of like a cool hit yeah yeah oh yeah every job I've had since then to this
00:52:32
day comes from that one sketch oh nice and so every little thing every audition
00:52:38
everything comes from that so then with Silicon Valley and then there was another show on TNT called Franklin and
00:52:44
Bash with breckenmeyer and Mark hilarious reference Franklin
00:52:50
I know but Dennis miliusko when are you on [ __ ] Franklin and Bash this week
00:52:55
well it's such a great great Turner and Hooch huh yeah it's like a Turner
00:53:02
that was like that was like a yeah Rizzoli that's that's that that beats it
00:53:08
the results at the same time as Rizzoli and Isle much worse numbers this is all true this
00:53:16
is all true um so I was on that show for like two years and it was you know it was funny
00:53:22
it was a fun show I had a fun part but I was like I gotta be on a comedy I didn't have a job so I went to the creators and
00:53:28
I was like guys can you like write me out of this show they're like did you get another job I said no I just wow I
00:53:34
could bet on myself and I really wanted me on a show that's a comedy they said
00:53:39
this is a comedy and you go oh yeah
00:53:44
I just was like I want to be honest sitcom guys I want to be on a sitcom so this said okay do one more season for us
00:53:50
but in the meantime you can go audition do whatever you want that's nice in fact I will just do one more season for us
00:53:56
cool out of the contract and and I said Thank you and the first
00:54:02
audition I did after season two was Silicon Valley okay okay and there we go
00:54:07
I get a call from my agents they're like Mike Judge has a new show and you know I grew up on Beavis and Butthead I I
00:54:13
office space is a love to yeah Mike Judge a quiet genius quiet quiet
00:54:19
brilliant yeah yeah and so I go and I audition for Mike and they give me two
00:54:25
different characters to audition for so I'm just excited I'm just excited to meet Mike you know he's a truly
00:54:31
genuinely a hero of mine Beavis and Butthead I don't mean this in a I truly
00:54:36
mean this I know I love love those characters I told them they're much funnier than Wayne and Garth I don't know if you believe me but I love Beavis
00:54:44
and Butthead there's a new season on Paramount plus Beavis and Butthead yes just as good as the original stuff do I
00:54:51
go in and audition for Mike and I do these two parts and um I had a good audition you know I
00:54:57
could tell they were laughing and stuff I was like okay that was a that was I feel good about that audition
00:55:03
I get a call from one of the other creators not Mike they say we really like you we don't think you're right for
00:55:09
either of the parts and I'm like [ __ ] but we're gonna write a part for you oh
00:55:15
and I said that's sweet I said thank you but people say that all the time you
00:55:21
know they're like you're not right for this we'll find something that never happens and then
00:55:27
um they're like okay we want you to come and do the network test for it um and I was out of town uh I couldn't
00:55:34
do it I was I was uh doing a pilot that never went that I also that I didn't like doing so I couldn't test I was like
00:55:41
[ __ ] it's over luckily I'd done a part sorry this is all confusing I'd done one scene I'd
00:55:47
done one episode of Veep season two that I'd auditioned for in Julia Louis Dreyfus and uh that that part turned out
00:55:55
funny I ended up having like one funny moment in that episode so HBO knew me
00:56:01
and so I flew back from Miami I was like [ __ ] I couldn't test
00:56:06
uh that's too bad I landed and I got a call um and you know when you get those calls
00:56:12
where like all your agents and managers are on the phone yeah it's usually good yeah usually good
00:56:20
they're all calling me remember us since the signing meeting you know yeah
00:56:26
they're all on it I lied and I have a voicemail they're like hey this is you know John Molly Jimmy Michael everybody
00:56:36
the ten percenters and they're like you have an offer to be on
00:56:42
Silicon Valley you got an offer with no audition I just did the one audition I didn't
00:56:48
yeah yeah the the studio and the network right I didn't have to do that because
00:56:53
they were so so lucky wow and just we we did the pilot and I just the entire time
00:56:59
was pinching myself because I got to work with all these funny people with Mike Judge you know we did the pilot and
00:57:06
we didn't find out for a long time like six or seven months if the show was going to get picked up
00:57:12
um and then it it got picked up and we ended up re-shooting most of the pilot
00:57:17
and they the style of Portlandia and and that you know it's you I mean you you
00:57:22
have a very how would you describe your acting style because it's very it's it's subtle yeah and just describe it very
00:57:28
natural David wanted to know I said let's let him describe it okay well I I
00:57:34
can't describe it but I will say John all Chula who is one of the creators of Silicon Valley give me the biggest
00:57:41
compliment I think I've ever received he said and this is going to sound bad but I I
00:57:46
it's it's a compliment he said you know you can do a joke and make it not sound like you're doing a joke and now yes
00:57:53
it's hard to do yeah I was like that is a really wonderful thing to hear especially with stand-ups
00:58:00
you know sometimes you see them acting and you can see they're trying to nail a joke
00:58:06
um and to me the key is you gotta hide it's a joke you gotta get the laugh you have to get the lie but it can't sound
00:58:12
like you're like delivering a punchline but if it's the tone like you're on shows that are interesting Veep the uh
00:58:18
near show are great very conversation for my sense of humor for probably yours
00:58:24
Dana and if you're on a sitcom you might have to blast it out a little bit and that's tougher because it might not be
00:58:31
your style or what you like at all but there are different tones of different
00:58:36
comedies but that kind of Comedy is obviously my favorite and uh but just
00:58:42
you're also very good at it and when you were on just shoot me you know you did a really good job
00:58:48
um of bringing that character to yourself so it really felt like you were yourself the entire time and the way you
00:58:54
were doing jokes was the way you do jobs it didn't feel like you were like performing outside of uh outside of
00:59:03
something that felt very natural to you right like a super character yeah it was more meeting with them ahead of time and
00:59:09
talking this is kind of what I do and this is kind of what they want and then tailoring it letting you add jokes on
00:59:16
the last take or say do whatever you want here or uh sometimes they would just say and then Spade says something funny
00:59:24
yeah they were great about it um and it you know what's funny is is what you
00:59:30
said at the very beginning about Dane as a nice guy George Siegel used to say the
00:59:35
biggest question I get is is David Spades as big of a prick as he seems like
00:59:41
because you were playing a snarky I was and I was I you know I've tried even toned down even that kind of
00:59:47
I thought it was subtle then I think it's got to be subtler now because I did you know you're you're going for laughs
00:59:53
and as a sitcom and you have a studio audience but you have to inch it up a little bit but I did like that kind of
00:59:59
humor and and all the shows I gravitate just watching your monologue even on SNL and then you were doing the sketches
01:00:06
they were they were playing you uh they did you justice because you you are doing a lot of stuff
01:00:12
to throw away chill super conversational and then and then and then the subversion comes or the twist and it's
01:00:19
so in rhythm with what you were just saying you know it's very very effective
01:00:24
and not easy to do you guys could do a sitcom yeah I'd love to do a sitcom with with you guys either yeah just this next
01:00:32
couple months are really tough for me though right now so I'm sorry yeah yeah yeah me too me too by the way by the way
01:00:38
listen look at Dana here's what he said in Vanity Fair which I thought was an interesting quote you said um our guest
01:00:43
and by the way no we will be doing a sitcom I was kidding um you said I like uh
01:00:49
I like oh you being a comedian makes you a better actor being an actor makes you a better writer
01:00:54
and then you're a better comedian than you were and then you're being a producer director all that stuff at all is very entwined I think that's what you
01:01:01
meant it's great I think that's it is really true and it's good you've got your hands and different things and you
01:01:06
see different things then you go oh I'm on that side oh I'm in this you know yeah I
01:01:12
remember you know shooting a sketch that I wrote on SNL I I I wrote a message oh
01:01:18
you wrote wow one week I had and then they they asked me to finish out the
01:01:24
season and I realized I was like sketches not my strength I don't my
01:01:30
brain doesn't work like this and it's a different animal for sure yeah yeah and my brain has never worked like that I
01:01:35
still can't I still can't write sketch you know and it used to like I used to be like you know I have friends like
01:01:42
Nick Roll I'm like wow this guy can really do sketch and it would bug me that I couldn't do it and now I'm like
01:01:48
you know what I have my strengths they don't include sketch so I wrote that for one week and we you know being part of
01:01:56
shooting a sketch and editing the sketch was very I understood like okay you can
01:02:03
do certain riffs it was a taped sketch pre-take you could do certain Rifts that
01:02:08
are going to make the crew laugh and the camera men laugh and everyone's going to laugh but those Rifts are never going to
01:02:15
make it into the show and so doing the editing um and being involved with the editing
01:02:21
and a lot of the projects that makes me realize like okay improvising is good however if you're just going off the
01:02:28
reservation um it's never going to be used it's just going to make those people laugh and ultimately it's kind of a waste of time
01:02:37
um and that's something I learned on the Silicon Valley too I remember we were doing this scene that was really really funny we were all riffing and Alec bird
01:02:43
one of the showrunners came up to us and said listen all of this is really funny we're having a great time however this
01:02:50
scene is about these three things this person finds out this information that goes from here to here the audience
01:02:56
hears this you can ref but if they don't Advance one of those three things it's not going
01:03:02
to be in the show and to me that like really connected everything I was like
01:03:08
oh wow it's not just about being funny we're just being funny Harry and it's not helping furthering the point of the
01:03:14
scene while being funded um and so all that I think everything makes you better at everything else and
01:03:21
that's how you ended up riding the big sick and getting an Academy Award nomination so you took all that
01:03:27
experience yeah and then your real life experience for people who don't know you wrote this incredibly successful
01:03:35
I know what you would call it genre is a romantic comedy basically
01:03:40
um uh yeah Emily with drama yeah yeah otherwise this movie together but I will say that Judd Apatow and Barry Mendel
01:03:47
one of the other producers really generally really taught us how to write he really carried us through that
01:03:54
entire process come here high level I don't know if this sounds like Judd
01:04:01
Apatow but this is a this is a substitute impression no it actually you've done pretty well I just got to
01:04:07
punch up a couple of things it doesn't sound like jet after none of this just sounds funny though it sounds like it
01:04:13
sounds like a funny character that's why I do 10 minutes of this to do both of you have certain different aspects of
01:04:20
Judd in there if you could combine them I think yeah no we've had Judd on this
01:04:26
show and uh he is very very very smart very clever about about writing about
01:04:32
what he's doing and producing you know he's the guy you want to call if you want to get something made you know I I
01:04:38
saw your trailer I have to say I did not see the movie and I'll take that part out later but I did not see the movie
01:04:43
you're making me sick when I watched the trailer it's such a great trailer because I first of all I got teared up
01:04:50
second of all Ray Romano who I work with lot is suit is great just in the trailer
01:04:55
your first joke is funny you're with the girl in bed um you know she says I I never have sex
01:05:01
twice in the first day is that her joke yeah and that was funny so it's off right away with a winner by the time Ray
01:05:08
comes in and Holly Hunter you have no skills that's what broadcasters yeah you have no schooling
01:05:16
yeah she so she and Ray and Ray's doing these dry things to you and it's awkward
01:05:22
I I just thought oh [ __ ] that's uh very well done and then that big twist of
01:05:27
what happens to the girl you're seeing anyway it's it's very uh well done my
01:05:32
first movie would not be anything that good I mean that's to write that [ __ ] well done because we had judge really
01:05:39
carrying us through and because of Judd we were able to get you know a really good cast so like Holly Hunter well Zoe
01:05:47
Kazan who plays Emily you know uh in the movie was the first person we cast and
01:05:52
we auditioned a lot of people and uh a lot of great people um and and a lot of like people who are
01:06:00
very very famous and we're very very famous then um and out of everyone Zoe was just the
01:06:06
best and once he had that Judd was like okay now we now we know who the who she is
01:06:12
now we know what her parents can be like and he was like you know I think it
01:06:18
should be Holly Hunter and we were like good luck wow yeah I think she'll do it
01:06:23
so we had a lot of conversations with Holly and once we had Holly Judd was like that's what judge sprung Ray Romano
01:06:30
he was like it's got I think Ray would be really good and I was a huge fan of his sitcom and his stand up and I just
01:06:35
never seen him do anything that wasn't hard comedy you know but Rey really
01:06:41
brought what Rey has inherently in everything he does is this like sadness
01:06:46
at his core like he's sort of an attack kind of stats he's a sensitive guy yeah
01:06:52
defensive guy that's what I mean sort of sensitive there's something like appealingly wounded about him
01:07:00
um and he was he's so so good in this movie you know David if you you know if
01:07:05
you if you find yourself when you watch the movie you'll see Ray and Holly really bring so much to it Holly it's
01:07:12
not you know Holly's done so much fantastic work in acting with Rey the
01:07:17
dramatic work he does in the movie it's yeah it's more surprising because it's just uh I work with I know a lot of
01:07:24
stuff he does and and he every there that nothing was wrong everything was
01:07:29
real everything was good just I'm just saying the trailer and I'm like [ __ ] this movie's so interesting so uh and
01:07:36
you pepper it out so it's you're you're hooked already and and and uh of course
01:07:43
you can't go wrong successful movie you you had a sensibility and it you never
01:07:48
winked you never stepped outside yet you never were gratuitous that's the key and
01:07:53
you just stayed in that world yeah yeah because you know if there's a woman there's a lot of funny jokes you can
01:07:59
make but if there's a woman in a coma there's a ceiling to the type of jokes you can make you know you can't go
01:08:07
because then if that kills a reality level the entire time you have to feel like all these people have a loved one
01:08:13
who's very very sick right now yeah yeah so they can make certain kinds of jokes but if they go past a certain line it's
01:08:20
heartless and it kills the whole movie The Judd making change the name from coma lady
01:08:26
yeah that was the working title with Mama lady um that sounds hilarious maybe it's too
01:08:32
much of a spoiler
01:08:38
[Music] so we did that and that happened you know I've been doing I think that was
01:08:44
season three of Silicon Valley in between Seasons three and four I did that and that was cool because Silicon Valley
01:08:51
was very successful show um but then big sick was getting to do
01:08:56
another kind of thing next level I think that's when your name just became just
01:09:01
way more familiar to a lot of Americans when those two things and came together I think you feel like it to you like I
01:09:09
yes you've arrived I mean you know well the weird thing I'm sure you guys have had this experience you know you you
01:09:16
fight for for me it was years of fighting for roles tiny rolls you know I
01:09:22
had the two years where I had a small one funny scene and a big comedy I did
01:09:27
that for a couple years you know so there's like six or seven movies you watch them I pop up for a scene I
01:09:33
deliver food I'm funny for two minutes and then I walk away um big sick change the kinds of
01:09:39
opportunities I guess sure overnight sadly I became one of the people who could I became one of the new comedy
01:09:45
actors you know so suddenly I'm I that's as soon as the a big sick comes out I
01:09:50
start getting scripts I start getting more opportunities people say that but it's really hard to get to a point where
01:09:55
you actually get scripts and get scripts that are like greenlit like if you do it we'll do it yeah I mean that that's a
01:10:02
whole other thing that you know this new show that I have coming out welcome to Chippendales
01:10:08
um uh on Hulu November 22nd it's the first time I've had a real situation you know
01:10:14
getting big sick made was a struggle we had to really put a cast together and sure and all that and it was only five
01:10:20
million welcome to Chippendales was the first time I've had in my career where they were like if you do this if you
01:10:27
join if you attach yourself we're gonna make this show I've never had that how cool and it's a the guy who started
01:10:33
Chippendales the gentleman started Chippendales and there's nefarious stuff uh around him so it's a pretty you know
01:10:41
people don't know this so Chippendale is a male stripping thing that's obviously a very very funny memorable SNL sketch
01:10:48
about it with uh Chris I didn't even think of that that's first time I haven't thought of that when I
01:10:54
heard Chippendale yeah I just think of hot guys yeah Patrick Swayze hot guys speaking of high
01:11:02
stud crushed it uh so when with Chippendales it's like it you're talking
01:11:07
about the guy that actually started it this is what it started it was this Indian immigrant uh who was this like
01:11:14
sort of fat nerdy Indian immigrant um he started Chippendale and the story
01:11:20
itself is wild um there's people don't know this there's murder and stuff involved the
01:11:26
first like few years of Chippendale uh it's it's really a lot of Nefarious
01:11:33
stuff that happens in it it really really crazy intense stuff that happens in it people get multiple people get
01:11:40
murdered this dude was setting fire to other like male strip clubs were popping
01:11:45
up that were Poppy and Chippendales he started setting fire to them and he got away with this stuff for years and years
01:11:50
and years and so this story is a really really I couldn't believe it so much
01:11:56
like 20 crazy things happen in it that are unbelievable is it like a series or a straight movie it's just uh Eight
01:12:03
Episodes it's a short series Eight Episodes uh November 22nd we come out with two episodes of the cast is amazing
01:12:10
it's Murray Bartlett who just me for White Lotus Juliette Lewis is in it
01:12:15
um who's really really wonderful from Ashford and Simpson yeah
01:12:23
that's a different one so can we touch on I mean between these two you hosted SNL and then the eternals yeah and I
01:12:30
know it's probably like a sore spot people go hey you got so muscular you know is that like just a dead horse at
01:12:35
this point when you hear that well no because it is weird to sort of what it
01:12:41
helped me do and it really did and I think you guys probably related to some
01:12:47
level yeah I mean well I relate as you can see I was tired of being known as
01:12:52
the most strongest comic I I only I am baby Scrappy I'll fight because when I
01:13:01
fight All I'm gonna think is my dad left me as a kid and all the anger is going to come out so someone's gonna get it
01:13:06
all you have nothing to lose come on what was that what was your mental state about that right about that becoming a
01:13:14
different physical person what it helped me do was when you're in this when you're a comedy actor in this business
01:13:20
it's very easy to be put in a box you know so all the stuff I did I was sort of like the funny nerdy guy you know
01:13:28
um and what that allowed me to do was break out of that I don't mean necessarily become an action star or
01:13:35
anything it just had people had people who give you jobs see me as not just a
01:13:42
nerd so the actual opportunities I started getting from that were not specifically action opportunities I
01:13:49
started getting opportunities to play like normal non-nerdy just different yeah so that makes sense but the actual
01:13:55
biggest jump there was big sick and then
01:14:00
eternals is such a jump but once you get an offer like that or someone sees you like that obviously you probably said
01:14:07
I'm gonna do my best and I'm gonna make sure they didn't make a mistake I'm gonna work out I'm gonna look the part but what a huge flattering opportunity
01:14:15
to be in a movie like that Marvel I'd like to be in one if they're listening I'll play a character I don't know if I
01:14:20
could jack up but what I'm interested is because then you you'd do this and it helps you get out of type casting yeah
01:14:27
then you're still walking around as that because I went I'd lift the weights a little bit you know I I still I did
01:14:33
push-ups yesterday I mean I do do things but if you get to a low body fat in a
01:14:38
high lean mass then you're gonna walk around different with and your libido is
01:14:44
gonna go way up because any kind of little fat around the middle you know is
01:14:51
not an inert thing in your body it affects your hormone so I'm just curious about you as a person that transitioned
01:14:58
to that kind of Fitness just walking around that powerful how are you feeling about it it's like it must be fun it's a
01:15:06
very good question I don't feel any different in terms of how I think of
01:15:11
myself I don't feel that I am a different person at all um I do feel on a base level stronger
01:15:18
you know bags are less heavy if I do grow trees not as hard the libido thing
01:15:24
is very real it's suddenly um it shifts
01:15:29
um you know the way my wife she's always loved me but the way she talks about my
01:15:35
body now is different what do you what do you mean what do you mean she went from like to love okay cool finally what
01:15:42
do you mean she finally said I love you what's that that's great well Maria Shriver used to say that when she would
01:15:48
get in bed she would get in bed Arnold would get in bed and then his body was
01:15:53
there it was like a threesome yeah so it's like you know it's it's come up with you and wife and then and then
01:15:59
washboard abs I mean I guess women like touching them I don't know I've never had that problem she said initially it
01:16:06
was so funny she said when we when I first got in shape and we would have sex she was like it kind of feels like
01:16:12
[ __ ] the corner of a building
01:16:23
um but every now and then still if I like take my shirt off she'll just be like Jesus Christ oh yeah she knows a certain
01:16:31
way and so to see just me just look differently look different it's still
01:16:36
surprising to her it's so interesting because you know we're interviewing we're talking today and you're the exact same person it's just interesting to be
01:16:43
married to someone who does a physical transformation like that so you physically you're looking at a different
01:16:49
person yes and uh and I guess it's a real turn on I'm you know I'm a I'm
01:16:54
gonna I'm not saying I'm gonna get like you are but I'm gonna double down what Emily seeing me and doing this uh about
01:17:02
a year and a half ago started weight training herself and it's completely changed it's completely changed her body
01:17:09
and how she feels about her body like she's got like muscles now she's got biceps and stuff it's it's really
01:17:15
interesting um and she sees what I get out of it I get a lot out of just the working the
01:17:22
process of working on specifically yeah um it's it's helped me with my anxiety
01:17:27
obviously you know work Comics I assume we all have anxiety from being happy is something that always requires
01:17:33
management working out helps with that it's incredible yeah sleep better yeah so sleeping has always been an issue for
01:17:40
me and now I sleep better obviously it's still hard sometimes you know I didn't sleep well last night but hard to shut
01:17:46
your mind off kind of thing yeah you look like you're playing bad you think about all the things that could have been and all these things you're going
01:17:52
to follow up in the future all the regrets yeah all right Dan I think we have to let him go because uh
01:17:59
oh we have another one coming no he's being very cool you guys are so great I'm such a fan of both of you and this
01:18:05
was such a thrill for me to do thank you for having me on uh it's an absolute pleasure I just enjoyed it as a
01:18:11
conversation and yeah it was great honest authentic down to earth dude I think it's very fun talking to you I
01:18:18
don't know you at all it's great to sit here and this is a great hour with you and uh we really appreciate it it's
01:18:24
going to be people are going to love to hear from you they heard from you part of it right it was mostly me and Dana but I think
01:18:31
that that's I'm sorry I'm just a fan so that was really interesting to me sister thank you for sharing those stories well
01:18:38
we love people asking us questions because we're fundamentally flawed I mean for for interviewers we're both
01:18:43
have narcissistic yeah Tendencies so when you start saying hey Dana what about this but you know my brain lit up
01:18:48
man I got an endorphin rush no it's more like dinner we all just talk and everyone talks it's a conversation
01:18:54
interview it's not 60 Minutes you know it's but I think our view people who don't know you or they know about you
01:19:00
this will this will be a fun conversation for them to listen to for sure you know especially ending on the high libido thing two people are in
01:19:07
their 40s really fit having a lot of sex talking about their wives [ __ ] sides
01:19:14
of buildings yeah yeah I wanna I wanna my wife said you're like I feel like I'm
01:19:19
[ __ ] a delicatessen yeah well she listens to this podcast
01:19:26
she'll be laughing all right leave
01:19:33
hey what's up flies what's up fleas what's up people that listen we want to hear from you and your dumb questions
01:19:38
questions ask us anything anything you want you can email us at fly on the wall
01:19:44
at cadence13.com oh we have questions Joseph okay
01:19:51
I like what he calls my nickname now for from Joseph Bettina what is votino
01:19:57
votino I'm gonna think it's both times it says Hans and spudley so I'm hanza hunts and Franzen yours budly from from
01:20:03
Dennis Miller spotley uh okay I heard a rumor that Lauren insisted this is a good question Lauren
01:20:09
insisted that his movie posters be set against a background of blue sky and white clouds never would have
01:20:17
thought of that in a million years Tommy Boy Black Sheep both Wayne's World Coneheads Ladies Man Superstar
01:20:25
huh all do this is it true I guess it's true if you just said it and did he
01:20:31
explain himself never put that together Joseph it must
01:20:37
be some sort of testing that says that makes you happy it's a psychological
01:20:43
thing for the audience that the box office will go Sky High um so you have a sky background that's
01:20:49
all I could think of I don't I'm still not sure this is true Joseph is this a trick let's look at a clip
01:20:56
well let's call Lauren hello yes who's this guys would we we
01:21:03
varied the clouds Dana you're cutting out this better be important uh Lauren yes
01:21:09
it's about Coneheads what I'm putting on a show this week yeah but we need to know about the background of ladies man
01:21:15
and Superstar um I'm going to hang up now but I love you both no I'm gonna put Marcia I'll
01:21:21
come on the podcast soon again Marcy he's got it's hey he's got some questions
01:21:28
so are we answering Joseph's patino's question and he already know what's the answer to uh he's asking if it wasn't
01:21:35
true ever explain this no he didn't but I like this I think it's a very
01:21:40
interesting observation because it might be true it seems to have helped because I've heard
01:21:48
of all those movies so that means something worked right yeah I I have no
01:21:53
opinion I don't I I don't know if Lauren did it I don't know if the posters look like that there's some method to the
01:21:59
madness they have to do that now the word trick goes with questions it's a trick question you know when we're in
01:22:05
this is the last thing we're in read through and Schneider yeah if you go and a garbage man comes
01:22:12
into the scene uh played by Ken among and everyone laughs and China goes track laugh that's not a real laugh that won't
01:22:19
get a laugh on the show don't count it well he has to call it out because you
01:22:24
know what I mean the audience wouldn't know who Kenny right it's a read through trick that we say some inside joke and
01:22:30
then it gets a big laugh and he goes make sure you negate like don't count on that on the show
01:22:36
that won't get a laugh it's it's flips over his pizza one slice flip all right that's it thank
01:22:42
you for the question and uh keep them coming [Music] this has been a podcast presentation of
01:22:48
cadence 13. please listen then rate review and follow all episodes available
01:22:54
now for free wherever you get your podcast no joke folks
01:22:59
fly on the wall has been a presentation of cadence 13. executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade Chris
01:23:05
Corcoran of cadence 13 and Charlie finan of brilstein entertainment the show's lead producers Greg Holtzman with
01:23:11
production and Engineering support from Serena Regan and Chris Basil of cadence 13.
