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hey it's your boy Mike The Situation
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Santino welcome to statute of
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limitations it's the ultimate lineup
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it's Cooks this is not my fault that I
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stole this car it's conmen this is my
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chance I can be rich for life it's WN to
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be queing pins we all made together
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$500,000 and queen pins it was basically
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a lounge of
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criminals these are stories of the
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nonviolent lucky punks and Robin hoods
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that Dodge the law I could have gone to
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prison not jail prison because here's
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the situation baby it's only a matter of
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time before the statute of limitations
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is up and technically you might walk
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away scotf free but don't take it from
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me guys guys I'm obviously no lawyer
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this is statute of
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limitations what's up I'm Mike The
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Situation sorantino on this episode of
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statute of limitations the story of a
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man his mother-in-law the desert and a
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shovel dig this guys we all know to get
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out of the hole you got to put down the
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shovel and apparently he forgot right
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now now it's a young lady with a scam
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for the ages she swiped more credit card
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accounts than you can count and we have
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people for that we do and in Illinois
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where her story takes place fraud can
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put you in prison for years talk about
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an uncomfortable situation and I would
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know here's a story of how she managed
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to avoid paying the ultimate price meet
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Kim hi I'm Kimberly and I committed
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credit card fraud with my brother and we
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got away with it okay so the year was
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1987 I was at the University of Illinois
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now you have to be in the mindset that
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this is before the days of computers so
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that meant it was very very easy to get
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away with wrongdoings I was the
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quintessential good girl we're talking
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Church two to three times a week class
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president I used to find Strays and find
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homes for them I didn't drink didn't
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smoke didn't curse didn't have Sexes of
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Virgin and so I was 1,000% a good girl
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my
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brother quite opposite 1,000% the
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opposite so my brother starts working at
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a high-end Boutique inside of an airport
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and because it's on the international
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terminal there are a lot of wealthy
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people that go in and out of that
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particular area of the
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airport my brother being who he is even
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since childhood has always had a scheme
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or a scam for us to be able to make
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money so he has this idea of what if we
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sell credit card numbers now you need to
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know this was the 80s so there was a
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credit card imprinter and you would take
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the credit card and you would lay it
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down under a series of carbons and so
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sometimes the client would take the
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carbons back and sometimes they would
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ask you to just throw them away well the
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thing is when you keep the carbons it's
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a complete imprint of your credit card
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information
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back then it was so common to say to
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someone if you were in a store you would
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say to the person do you want your
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carbons and that was to avoid credit
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card fraud and so what he would do is he
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would do a little psychological game
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where he would go you don't want these
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dirty carbons because it would leave
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this black ink all over your fingers
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then he would get the person out of the
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store and then he would have a stack of
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carbons by the end of the day so here's
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where I come in my brother needed
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clients we had the plan we needed the
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clientele and so what better than a
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college campus and people that need to
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travel during winter break spring break
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summer break etc etc so I let it be
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known to just a couple of people that I
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could get them really cheap plane
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tickets and so then a handful of people
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came to me and they were like hey I want
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to go to Miami for spring break hey I
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want to go to Colorado and so then I
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would say okay how many tickets do you
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need and then I would let him know all
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right we got a Cent what would we charge
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for this and he's like okay three
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tickets to Miami during spring break
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that's going to be $75 per ticket so
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then I would get the $75 they would get
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the credit card number and then
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sometimes depending upon the person I
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would then also make the reservations
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for them the best part of this situation
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is because it was the time before
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computers is that whenever I would call
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or whenever I would give the numbers I
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really had low fear because it was very
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very difficult to track what we were
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doing I would do different accents and I
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would pretend to be different people so
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if I called and acted like I was from
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the heart of Georgia then for whatever
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reason the agent on the other side would
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just say ma'am let me check that one
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more time for you and they were just so
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accommodating and British you can speak
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slower and they will take their time
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with you because they feel as though if
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you have a British accent and you are
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booking a flight to Switzerland you must
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be important
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mhm yeah I recall my very first client
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um my neighbors across the hall I would
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get the money they would get the credit
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card numbers I was scared I was
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absolutely positively terrified and I
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did it after the first sale it was kind
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of like a rebirth of the Kim I was
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officially a bad girl and um I
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absolutely positively liked it but
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it really wasn't who I was but it was
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one of those like who I could be and so
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I was still involved in student
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government I was helping out at the
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local shelter and then I had this
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illegal side business of credit card
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fraud but I think I kind of had this
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thought of as long as I'm putting a lot
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of good out into the world it balances
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the fact that I I pretty much have a a
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crime
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ring back then we did not have social
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media so everything was about word of
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mouth and before you knew it Word of
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Mouth let's just say I started trending
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people were knocking on the door and
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then it was like who's this random man
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and who's this random woman and then it
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was like oh so and so from such and such
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fraternity said that you got them
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tickets to Aspen and such and such and
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so on and I was like who and so then it
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was the do I trust you and then I was
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terrified that somebody was going to
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snitch on me and take down the whole
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business so then it became where I would
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make people wait so you would have to
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wait and then you would kind of have to
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like meet me in the quad at a certain
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hour so I was so afraid that they like
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had a wire on them and there was a whole
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sting you know cuz I came from a
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theatrical background so I was like
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there's something deeper going on and I
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was like I'm literally in the middle of
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a detective story right now I was like
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so who sent you you
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know and so I would Chase back like hey
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so and so do you know such and such did
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you tell them uh about me and they're
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like oh yeah yeah yeah he's cool it got
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so huge that I had to enlist my friend
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and so now I'm making enough where I can
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bring her in but now she's also got word
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of mouth going on and it's just growing
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and it's growing I was bringing in
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anywhere between, 1500 and 2,000 a month
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now mind you in
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1987 that's a lot of money shoot that's
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a lot of money now really if you think
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about it but I was doing very very well
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I'm growing fast than what my paranoia
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can process I'm terrified and happiest
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I've ever been in my entire life because
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my social stature has changed so I'm at
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the biggest parties everybody knows me
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I've got money in the bank I'm shopping
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and I am living the Hollywood Life in
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the corn fields of Illinois and so it's
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senior year and we have come to an end
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and so now it is spring
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and so the four of us now take a trip or
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planning a trip to the Bahamas so we're
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sitting at the airport we're all packed
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up we're ready to go sunscreen in hand
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baby let's roll and all of a sudden we
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look up and here's where my life of
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crime
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ends Kim's credit card travel scheme may
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have started off okay like most schemes
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but things are about to go sou way South
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when she realizes that all of these
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flight charges could get her charged
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with a couple decades in the clink no
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bueno the story takes a whole new
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Direction on statute of
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limitations
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next we're back with more statute of
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limitations we last left Kim as she
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continued her career of crime using
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stolen credit cards to cash in now her
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number actually might be up cuz even if
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you use someone else's card you still
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end up paying for it yourself because in
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Jersey karma is not just a club just
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watch and so it's senior year and we
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have come to an end and so now it is
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spring break and so the four of us now
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are planning a trip to the Bahamas so we
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get to the airport and because of me
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being the queen that I am these days I
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decide to splurge and pay for the
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private Admirals Club before beforehand
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so that we can wait inside the private
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Lounge so we're waiting in the lounge
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and it's pretty empty cuz it's kind of
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early in the day and we notice that
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there's like basically only one other
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guy in there in the corner that's kind
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of sitting behind us and all of a sudden
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we look
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up and a ton of cops are now standing in
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the
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lounge and they have their hands on
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their holsters like they're ready to
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draw so I look at my friend she looks at
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me and we're like The Jig Is up the
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police are coming full speed and they
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say freeze and we of course every muscle
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enses up we're balling and then they
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walk right past us and they arrest the
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guy behind
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us oh my God I can I can still feel like
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the the fear in my chest so I decided
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after that we're done clean break the
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business is
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over we are packing up shop um my social
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status has now completely changed I am
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now part of the gossip I'm no longer
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invited to the parties because I'm no
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longer offering the service and it was
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really kind of depressing and terrifying
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um because I kind of lost myself for a
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little bit and then I had to for when I
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say decades
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I
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mean 30 years 25 30 years of always
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worried about my karmatic
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debt
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of have I paid back enough to Society
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for what I did what was wrong and has it
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happened yes I have had my credit cards
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hacked I do believe four times now four
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times and it's a horrible feeling and um
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I know I'll never know who those people
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were that I was able to
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um sell their numbers for college
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student travel but um this is my formal
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apology I'm sorry I'm definitely sorry
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and you better believe I have paid for
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it let that be a lesson Kim may have
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thought that she got away after she quit
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her life of crime her life definitely
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declined because there's no statute of
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limitations when it comes to Karma so if
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you're ever thinking about stealing
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credit cards you better check yourself
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because you're going to have a situation
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right now it's time to hear from a guy
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who absolutely hates his mother-in-law
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big surprise what is the surprise is
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that he decided to commit the mother of
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all crimes to get back at her by
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stealing everything that she owns and
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that right there is definitely a plan
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this son of a actually pulled it
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off without a hitch I do not meet
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Matt hi I'm Matt and I robbed my
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mother-in-law it was 2002 I was living
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in Nevada at the time I was working for
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a trucking company just trying to make
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ends meet I got married very young I had
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a child even younger wasn't any secret
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that my mother-in-law thought that I
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wasn't good enough enough for her
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daughter she was like an ultimate Karen
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like a litigious Karen she respected No
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Boundaries always was at my residence uh
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in my house demeaning me there's an
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invasive species that can take over a
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habitat and ruin an ecosystem that's
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basically my mother-in-law I remember at
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one point we had a repair man come to
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the house and to her that was just
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evidence of me not being like a man's
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man so she was taking a dig like that
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and then I remember the conversation
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turned my son they were doing like a
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time capsule project she had started
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talking about like all these heirlooms
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that she had purchased so another thing
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you need to know about my mother-in-law
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is that she has a an obsession with fine
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heart one thing in particular she was
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talking about this original painting
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that she had her hands on in that moment
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it was like a light bulb went off I just
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remember sitting there at the table and
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just thinking I'm stealing this
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[Music]
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painting I guess I was aware enough to
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know that if I was going to do this that
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I was going to have to have things lined
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up beforehand and I also realized like I
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don't really know anything about art how
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am I going to like sell a piece of
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stolen artwork it wasn't really about
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money or artwork to begin with it was
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just more about spiting my mother-in-law
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probably a lot of guys out there that
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can relate to that so that's kind of
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when I came up with the idea of just
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bearing it like a time
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capsule
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and so here I am out in the desert at
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this discreet location that I picked I'm
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digging a hole with a pickaxe and a
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shovel I can't help but think the last
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time someone was out here burying
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something it was probably a body so I
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did that ahead of time but I still
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wasn't even actually sure if I was going
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to follow through with it until I was
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presented with more of an opportunity my
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wife's motherdaughter annual Spa SL wine
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tasting weekend together once that was
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kind of on the calendar I knew it's like
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this is it this is the weekend I'm going
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to do it my only responsibilities for
00:15:34
the weekend were to take care of my
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mother-in-law's dog and to drop my son
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off at a soccer game I packed our
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minivan with the Pelican box and a
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cooler full of
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Refreshments we drove him to his game
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walked him out on the sideline made sure
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there were lots of parents that saw me
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there I said hello made my appearances
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so I snuck off to the car drove straight
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to my mother-in-law's house and just
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started grabbing stuff I mean I took
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everything all the prints off the walls
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the expensive ones the reproductions the
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Fine China so I remember I get
00:16:11
everything loaded into the car and
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adrenaline's just going crazy and I'm
00:16:15
about to get out of there and I had the
00:16:17
Epiphany like this is going to look too
00:16:19
clean like you just let yourself in like
00:16:23
who are they going to come ask questions
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to the guy that has been watching the
00:16:27
dog and that has a garage door opener
00:16:29
and a key to the house I'm freaking out
00:16:31
cuz I'm like you don't know what you're
00:16:32
doing I'm second guessing myself so I
00:16:35
was like you got to make this look like
00:16:37
somebody else did it so at that point I
00:16:40
was like I got to smash a window I went
00:16:43
out into the backyard without trying to
00:16:45
be seen and I picked up a rock out of
00:16:47
her
00:16:48
garden and I threw it it just clanked
00:16:53
the side of the house so I picked the
00:16:56
rock up again I chucked it and it smash
00:16:59
the window in you can't just smash a
00:17:02
window with a rock they're not going to
00:17:03
assume that that's how they got in then
00:17:05
you got to go up and then like push the
00:17:07
window up like they let thems in so I
00:17:10
ran back up and I kind of pushed the
00:17:13
window next to the broken one up to make
00:17:15
it look like they reached through the
00:17:17
hole that The Rock had made and pushed
00:17:19
the window up at that point I don't know
00:17:21
did the Neighbors hear the broken window
00:17:23
has anyone seen me like you've wasted
00:17:25
entirely too much time you got to you
00:17:27
got to go so like I was all ready to
00:17:29
leave and then I'm just panicking at
00:17:31
that point I feel like I'm just running
00:17:33
circles around the house the windows
00:17:34
broke let's haul ass out of here I got
00:17:36
to get in the car I got to I got to get
00:17:38
out of here immediately I just remember
00:17:41
like trying to calmly exit the garage
00:17:44
calmly drive out of the neighborhood but
00:17:47
then I got to a highway and I just
00:17:48
started burning cuz I realized there was
00:17:50
only so long that I could be gone before
00:17:52
people started asking me
00:17:56
questions I've got to the location as
00:17:59
quick as I could in the minivan and I
00:18:01
just took that Pelican box out of the
00:18:03
back and I just threw it in the
00:18:06
hole and I started covering it with dirt
00:18:10
I'm just pushing everything in I was
00:18:12
digging as furiously as frantically as I
00:18:15
could I mean it was broad daylight and
00:18:18
then I just hear a helicopter circling
00:18:22
around above me and I look up and it's
00:18:24
just flying over and I'm like I'm done
00:18:27
like
00:18:28
I've already been
00:18:31
caught it's kind of like a scene out of
00:18:33
Good Fellas it's got the Choppers and
00:18:35
the coppers but he went to the desert to
00:18:38
bury his mother-in-law's art not his
00:18:40
mother-in-law so how did Matt clean out
00:18:42
his mother-in-law's house and make a
00:18:44
clean getaway we've got all the dirty
00:18:46
details next on statute of
00:18:49
limitations we're back with more statute
00:18:52
of limitations where our boy Matt was so
00:18:54
fed up with his mother-in-law he decided
00:18:56
to rob her blind unfortunately for him
00:18:59
the cops aren't blind because now
00:19:02
they're on to him I know right anyway so
00:19:06
how did Matt manage to escape the long
00:19:08
arm of the law he'll tell you right now
00:19:11
check this
00:19:13
out I just hear a helicopter circling
00:19:16
around above me and I look up and it's
00:19:19
just flying over and I'm like I'm done
00:19:22
I've already been caught I was digging
00:19:25
as furiously as frantically as I could I
00:19:28
mean it was broad daylight at this point
00:19:30
I'm just trying to get it done and get
00:19:32
out of there I just remember trying to
00:19:34
calm myself and steady myself I was
00:19:36
literally like hands shaking as I drove
00:19:39
and I was just trying to
00:19:40
like find a way to get my heart rate
00:19:43
down and to calm myself so that I wasn't
00:19:45
going to look all sweaty and dirty and
00:19:46
weird when I got back to my son's game
00:19:49
so like I mean I was basically trying to
00:19:51
like show up like I was a soccer mom
00:19:52
with Refreshments like I got orange
00:19:54
wedges and RC Cola everybody but uh you
00:19:58
know I just committed a
00:20:05
robbery so after we get home from the
00:20:07
game like I'm just sitting around
00:20:09
waiting until Sunday evening until my
00:20:11
mother-in-law and wife get home I've got
00:20:14
all the time in the world basically to
00:20:16
go over in my head over and over again
00:20:18
like what did I miss what did I screw up
00:20:21
was I seen who saw me like it's enough
00:20:23
to like literally make someone lose
00:20:24
their mind so I basically was just
00:20:26
sitting around waiting for my
00:20:28
mother-in-law going to hysterically tell
00:20:30
us how her house had got
00:20:32
robbed I have to react like this is all
00:20:34
news to me like somehow I'm sympathetic
00:20:37
to her situation but in reality in my
00:20:40
head I'm like screw this lady you know
00:20:42
obviously when your house is Rob police
00:20:45
are going to come around and ask lots of
00:20:46
questions they came over and asked me
00:20:49
you know where I was and I was a nervous
00:20:51
wreck on the inside you know like I'm
00:20:53
like here's the day they finally you
00:20:55
know they're finally going to put it all
00:20:56
together like they're asking me all
00:20:57
these questions question like when was
00:20:58
the last time you went by the house you
00:21:00
know I told him like Saturday morning I
00:21:02
put some food out you know for the dog
00:21:05
they asked me some questions about like
00:21:06
whether or not i' noticed any suspicious
00:21:09
activity or if I had seen anything or
00:21:10
what the state of the house was I guess
00:21:12
when I was there you know told him it
00:21:14
was normal obviously that I hadn't
00:21:16
really noticed anything and you know I
00:21:18
felt like I there was no way I didn't
00:21:21
feel or look guilty when they're asking
00:21:23
me questions but you know to my surprise
00:21:26
they were mostly just asking me
00:21:28
administrative stuff part of the slow
00:21:32
dissipation of me like realizing I had
00:21:34
probably gotten away was that was uh
00:21:37
when my mother-in-law got her insurance
00:21:39
check you know like she wasn't satisfied
00:21:42
with it you know ate at her that she
00:21:44
didn't have the artwork there's some
00:21:46
crimes you
00:21:47
regret this one isn't one for me for me
00:21:50
it was never about the money it was just
00:21:52
about creating some chaos for my
00:21:54
mother-in-law it's no surprise I'm no
00:21:56
longer with my wife you can't Rob your
00:21:59
mother-in-law and then keep a healthy
00:22:01
[Laughter]
00:22:04
relationship uh it was probably headed
00:22:07
there anyway to this day I've still
00:22:09
never dug any of it up to find out how
00:22:11
valuable it is one day my son's going to
00:22:13
be able to dig that up like a time
00:22:15
capsule and find out for himself would I
00:22:17
ever do this again absolutely
00:22:20
not I will never get married
00:22:25
again and that's my story of barried
00:22:28
treasure thanks to the laws of the land
00:22:31
Matt got away from his Crime Free and
00:22:33
Clear and got the one thing every man
00:22:36
wants for his mother-in-law payback
00:22:39
except for me I love my mother-in-law
00:22:43
Mom I hope you're watching love you that
00:22:46
does it for this episode but if you like
00:22:48
those stories of regular folks
00:22:49
committing crimes without ever doing the
00:22:52
time we've got a whole lot more lined up
00:22:54
for you I'm Mike The Situation stino see
00:22:58
you next time on statute of
00:23:01
limitations this program is for
00:23:03
entertainment purposes only and it is
00:23:06
not legal advice the statute of
00:23:08
limitations are complicated and depend
00:23:10
on many factors if you need advice you
00:23:13
should seek legal counsel from a
00:23:15
competent attorney in your
00:23:19
[Music]
00:23:26
jurisdiction
00:23:29
[Music]
00:23:44
oh
00:23:50
yeah
00:23:54
[Music]
00:23:56
yeah
00:24:02
[Music]
