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The Criminologist Who's Personally Tested Every Drug

May 26, 2026 / 01:02

This episode discusses drug use, including MDMA and heroin, featuring humorous anecdotes from a former drug dealer.

The guest shares experiences with various drugs, emphasizing the joy of MDMA and recounting his time in the heroin community.

He describes himself as a principled person despite selling heroin, claiming to be an honest dealer.

Humor is prevalent as he talks about a mishap involving deep heat, leading to a funny but uncomfortable situation.

Overall, the conversation highlights the guest's candid approach to drug use and the importance of personal experience in discussing these substances.

TL;DR

A former drug dealer humorously discusses MDMA, heroin, and personal experiences with various drugs.

Episode

1:02
00:00:00
The MDMA, you know, ecstasy, well, we
00:00:02
used to say it should be compulsory.
00:00:04
It's makes you so happy.
00:00:06
>> [laughter]
00:00:08
>> I've always considered myself to be a
00:00:10
principled person, and people might say,
00:00:12
"Oh, well, then how come you're selling
00:00:14
heroin?" Well,
00:00:15
I was in the heroin community, and I was
00:00:17
a good dealer. I was an honest heroin
00:00:19
dealer.
00:00:20
>> [laughter]
00:00:21
>> On occasion, I didn't have any Vaseline.
00:00:26
And so, I used deep heat.
00:00:28
>> [laughter]
00:00:30
>> It was a mistake. I got a feel like I
00:00:31
had a [ __ ] bugger stuck up me bum.
00:00:35
A red hot bugger.
00:00:37
>> [laughter]
00:00:38
>> I was [snorts] giving lectures on drug
00:00:40
use and so on. I was uh making sure any
00:00:43
new drug that was around, I got hold of
00:00:45
it and used it. Used a bit of ecstasy, I
00:00:47
used a bit of methamphetamine, and all
00:00:50
the the drugs that were around, I would
00:00:52
always make sure I had a go
00:00:55
>> [laughter]
00:00:55
>> so that I knew what I was talking about,
00:00:57
you know? What what did you like of of
00:00:58
the more recent drugs? Like what
00:01:00
Methamphetamine's pretty good.

Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

  • 70
    Funniest
  • 60
    Most unserious (in a good way)

Episode Highlights

  • The Joy of MDMA
    MDMA, also known as ecstasy, is described as something that should be compulsory for happiness.
    “It's makes you so happy.”
    @ 00m 04s
    May 26, 2026
  • Honest Heroin Dealer
    A self-proclaimed principled person reflects on their role in the heroin community.
    “I was an honest heroin dealer.”
    @ 00m 19s
    May 26, 2026
  • A Painful Mistake
    A humorous anecdote about using deep heat instead of Vaseline leads to an awkward experience.
    “I got a feel like I had a [ __ ] bugger stuck up me bum.”
    @ 00m 30s
    May 26, 2026
  • Exploring New Drugs
    A speaker shares their commitment to understanding drugs by trying them firsthand.
    “Methamphetamine's pretty good.”
    @ 01m 00s
    May 26, 2026

Episode Quotes

  • It's makes you so happy.
    The Criminologist Who's Personally Tested Every Drug
  • I was an honest heroin dealer.
    The Criminologist Who's Personally Tested Every Drug
  • Methamphetamine's pretty good.
    The Criminologist Who's Personally Tested Every Drug

Key Moments

  • MDMA Happiness00:04
  • Honest Dealer00:19
  • Awkward Experience00:30
  • Drug Exploration01:00

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