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A Bone To Pick With Bobby's Mom | Ep 185 | Bad Friends

September 25, 2023 / 01:14:16

This episode features discussions about friendship dynamics, party invitations, and humorous anecdotes. Bobby Lee, Andrew Santino, and their guests share personal stories and comedic takes on various subjects.

The conversation begins with Bobby and Andrew discussing a party that one of their friends, Macon, hosted without inviting them. They express their feelings of betrayal and humorously plot revenge, showcasing their comedic chemistry.

As the episode progresses, they shift to discussing a viral TikTok star who has no arms and legs, sharing their admiration for her resilience and humor. They joke about her content and the challenges she faces, while also exploring societal perceptions of disabilities.

The hosts also touch on serious topics like self-defense laws in California, referencing a controversial case involving a homeowner who shot an unarmed woman. Their banter mixes humor with commentary on legal and moral implications.

Throughout the episode, the group shares personal stories, including Bobby's family history and cultural anecdotes, blending humor with deeper reflections on life experiences.

TL;DR

Bobby and Andrew humorously discuss friendship, viral TikTok stars, and self-defense laws while sharing personal stories and cultural insights.

Episode

1:14:16
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two are bad friends who are these two idiots
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[Music] or something we're bad friends let me
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let me let me try to break down your bones I would love to break your bones let me say this are you mad at Bobby or
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you're you you're holding a little Grudge because you wanted her to come to your house because you have a crush on this girl Bobby did it out of spite do
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you have a crush on this girl no I just had to get the numbers up at the party I love Angie you're just a friend with her
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love great gal yeah she's a good comic good comment good friend all this stuff aside you have a crush on her and you're
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mad that he she went to dinner with Bobby yeah he's gotta cry okay so this is what
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it is it's my turn to both it is your turn to bone bone baby
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have a party and not invite
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your bosses wow very very interesting did invite you you're done talking right
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now your bone is over you already picked your bone buddy bones picked Bones pick kiddo go ahead Bob
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[Music] [Laughter]
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what I'm saying is is that Angie goes oh yeah I'm gonna go to mcconn's party
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do you want to go and I go keep the hands up there's no way there's no way
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that the kid that I brought into my family yeah yeah yeah had a party yeah
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party at his house he didn't even [ __ ] invite his bosses interesting move interesting move it's beyond
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interesting it's deception it's Shadow Play It's evil it's dark it's Voodoo
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it's K it's Cambodian back in the 60s though back you know it is Cambodia in the 60s when you pulled pot was doing it
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it's dark yes I agree no no no no you don't get to speak also
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how was the party don't speak and also can I say something [Laughter]
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I would have gone oh yeah I would have gone wouldn't you have gone I'd love to get invited to parties him and I went to
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the party store we had party we got the little cone we already had and I got that yeah yeah we've got all of it we're
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just waiting for the call Bud but this is interesting he doesn't invite us how by the way how do you throw a party in a tent off the off Santa Monica Boulevard
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how do you throw a party you well you it's you have to bring your own tent you have to bring your own stuff yeah you
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bring your own beer and stuff byot bring your own 10. and I'll say this I just realized Bobby this is why we're best
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friends I I was angry at Macon other stuff now I'm angry because he didn't invite his bosses to his house party he
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didn't think about us didn't consider us Carlos did you get an invite oh yeah are you being real yeah I got an invite now
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I had to teach you a lesson yeah you do I have to teach you a lesson yeah you do I'm gonna do what we're gonna do log in
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we're gonna have a bad friend's party a huge a huge party and I promise you bud
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you're not invited and if I should see you there your bones are gonna be broken he's gonna break your bone bone to pick
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bone broken didn't go to the party though I I know that's why because it was out of respect for us and out of
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loyalty of course and you're a comrade Pete did you go to the party
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everybody but us interesting move interesting move the good news is Bones
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been picked yeah the bad news is macomb's gonna get docked pay for the next three months yeah that's fine
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you're not gonna be laughing Bud you're not gonna be laughing you think that this is a all jokes you think this is a
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game it's not this is real because when the [ __ ] war begins
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there will be an apocalypse There Will Be Blood right and there will be an alien invasion or there will be a zombie
00:03:43
thing or something you're not gonna come into the compound nope you're going to be out there and you know you're gonna
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be you know what you're going to be dude you're going to be one of those zombies they're going to cut your legs and arms off oh I love that right and you're
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going to be strapped your neck right to a little [ __ ] room and guess what's gonna happen to you dude
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we're gonna let the dogs get you yep but not sexually to I mean yes sexually I
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mean what I don't know whatever I think sexually is right I think what what that's the one Carlos what was
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that face about I just I just imagine dogs penetrating but he's a zombie it doesn't matter oh
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that's right yeah yeah that's true no but here's the deal maybe cut that part no no leave that in
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let's make it no I want dog I realize sometimes they say things hey guys listen I'm a professional uh podcaster
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you're trying but sometimes I say things and and they don't make sense here's the deal I want Macon to be sexually
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assaulted by dogs thank you it does make sense when yes of course and the whole time while he's trapped in the room
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being assaulted by a German Shepherds yeah we're gonna play who let the dogs out on Loop
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and he has to do that part he has to go and that's your punishment and you won't
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be laughing pal I hope the party was a bust did it get break broken up by the cops no apparently there was a lot of people there I heard yeah well it was
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you know why six people because your bosses weren't invited right six we had about 20 on the roof at one point
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oh oh 20 on the roof well there is no otherwise they're in his voice
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what's a studio apartment that's about 54 square feet it was like Woodstock huh Woodstock 23 20 people what the [ __ ]
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this is going to be McConnell by the way show him a clip of this woman there's a woman I found on on Tick Tock you have to see this woman
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no arms no legs this one that's how badass this woman is her Tick Tock handle I saw is called no limbs which is
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dope that she's just got she's going right into the fire you know what the craziest part is she's trans look at that guy just kicked
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that's her husband that's her husband that's her husband kicks her to the ground wow they do this stuff all the time he
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throws her in the pool yeah oh does he really yeah here's the wildest [ __ ] Bob yeah she's trans she was born with no
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arms no legs no arms don't like to be real she is there's no way look at the top it says trans look at the very top
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look trans right there right there look at she has a trans flag right in her profile oh yeah he talks about it the
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whole time she's born no arms no legs and she cut off the one thing God did give her though that's
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[Laughter] no I like
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your stuff I sh and I said look at how quickly she does makeup she has no arms and no legs
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get ready a little bit faster when we go out please no arms no legs yeah yeah reach
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out see if she'll come on the show I mean if she she look at she's hilarious she's got her Tick Tock is so [ __ ]
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funny dude I love watching when she listens like Aerosmith Walk This Way yeah mine go roll this way
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roll this way what if we make her a playlist when she comes of all songs like they're like walking in L.A
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you're kind of that's your kind of lady though you did say she's hot you think you this is what you're kind of into with makeup she's not bad looking at all
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I I feel like she has a great personality and since what do you mean with makeup without makeup you say no no look at you you think you're [ __ ]
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Brad Pitt came out wrong my bad my bad Jesus I think she has a great personality and I'd be lucky to be with
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this trans God bless and you're right you would I see you got some new ice on your neck by the way oh yeah just good
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luck are you gonna move to Texas no I just rap it okay yeah I just wrap it I know but if that was your wife or you
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know and you're on the Titanic you know quickly you could throw her in
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the boat you'd throw her right in the boat no one would even see it you know maybe I'll
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save you I mean it's just one of those things that's like this is just a whole thing go ahead I mean let me go ahead I
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mean look they're having a nice down and then you would have to like you know what I mean I don't know what you do you
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carry no I would use her as a buoy is she like the door that Jack floats on
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at the end of the day yeah [Laughter] yeah yeah that's insane insane anyway is that her too yeah she's the [ __ ] oh
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oh you're right she's trans she said she was yeah you're right let's go back to oh so she was born that way she was born
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with no no arms and no legs her [ __ ] could have got a nom yeah she went to Nam
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yeah no she did no she did there's a storm yeah she went to she dude she's like 20 something years old you mean she
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could have gone into like maybe Afghanistan you know those like bomb Specialists when they put the suit
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oh like Hurt Locker Hurt Locker Hurt Locker it's major kudos to this woman for [ __ ] going into the fire of the
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internet and going no limbs is her [ __ ] profile and making jokes and then letting her husband they do a game
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with pillows there's a funny thing where they can't guess a word they hit each other with a pillow she uses her mouth to whip the pillow he [ __ ] cracks her
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as hard as he can with a pillow she goes flying into the fireplace yeah that would I do I would do that too you would yeah you don't hold back okay let's just
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you know let's move on what else is there to say I'm impressed
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I think it's what else is there to say I'm impressed I'm impressed too and she's the captain of her kickball team
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[Music]
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yeah how amazing is this no limbs and she can swim how embarrassed would you be if you couldn't swim she's no limbs
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and she can still swim that's amazing whoa whoa that's awesome yeah Pete
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could I be honest with you though go on that's what this show is for when he's at a public pool like that when she's at
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a public channel right no disrespect no disrespect there should be a sign
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down going I'm here just say Limitless limbless person here imagine no because I'm
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a mess he does he he doesn't know that she's there what if she was a lifeguard
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oh dude qualified what if it's if it said what if there was a sign that said yeah she can swim what if it said
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lifeless limbless lifeguard on duty yeah Lloyd yeah Limitless lifeguard on duty
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that's what you know what kind of say something if she saved you from drowning beautiful she couldn't do chest
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compressions for CPR but she could blow into your mouth she'd head butt your chest well if I'm
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on the bottom like I'm drowning I'm on the bottom of the pool yeah she you know I mean she does a I I guess a eel
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yeah well no eel stroke no what's the one what's the one what's this the butterfly yeah no
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it's Express you can't she can't do butterflies can't do any of it well then what's up what's the butterfly without wings
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they have underwater snakes uh a sea snake a sneeze a Snee snake
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yeah yeah right so she would go down to the bottom and grab you by your hair she can bite she she can bite I know she has
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her teeth no no I'm saying she's biting she was biting stuff to get stuff done before so she must use her teeth for almost everything I love it I love it
00:11:02
too but you know what's great about it is that she she's able to make a living off of it look at how many followers she
00:11:08
has probably she's probably killing I think it's four million holy moly how many is that that's money in our pocket 4.2 million incredible I love that me
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too [ __ ] yeah uh could I ask you a question please
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yeah I don't know I mean does she have wings no did she get him about like does
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God go hear you I forgot to add these
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so in the afterlife yeah thanks thanks what if she hates it it straps it back
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on what if she you forgot
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right I don't know maybe she's thriving she's still she was skating in one of those clips
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she skates no she doesn't dude show the guy there's a professional skateboarder that has no legs that skates show the
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guy no legs skateboarder have you seen this [ __ ] guy seen him yeah he's incredible yeah because but before you
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even do that he has arms yeah you can't do it without
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arms if you have a homie there with you that can start you up you just push it with your foot yeah to your kick push
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dog okay just kick pushing it's just amazing this is a what's his name Italo
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he's great I've seen him before he's great he [ __ ] rips this guy look at
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this look at this dropping in on a halfway that's incredible look at that little big spin incredible
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[ __ ] rips it rips dude yeah yeah you have to be able to push
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he's cute too look at his face yeah he's the [ __ ] look at his forearms by the way amazing
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I think there was one clip of him oh oh he's doing backflips in the ocean amazing look at how jacked I have a question
00:12:53
about him too yeah be honest does he can he get on the rides at Magic
00:12:59
Mountain no way you don't think he can if you hold him up in line if you have to walk when you walk to the heights he
00:13:05
has to still go do this hide thing or no I feel like it's such an let me look how about this here's what you would do I
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even would think of that you would just put on put on pants that are just hanging down you'd hold him so it looks like oh like his hat yeah so you're like
00:13:20
his homie but yeah yeah yeah I see that'd be the way to do it or you could just strap him onto your stomach and go
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he's my baby no no we're we're what we're Siamese oh we're
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conjoined yeah but he's the kind that goes out of the stomach sure they wouldn't know and then could you ride with him like
00:13:40
that I imagine they might have to let you yeah yeah but the bar wouldn't be able to go because they don't hide they don't do hide this way but
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I mean the clock will stop here you're probably gonna fall out or I could just stick him up
00:13:51
I mean you're right you're right I think you're right I think you're right I think you're right these are the rights
00:13:56
where you need legs at Disneyland see now this is this is this is they have that yeah you have to have legs for
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these if yeah you know dude we got a protester I don't like this on any ride
00:14:09
they want to what rides do you not have to have legs for does that say Space Mountain yeah oh Space Mountain you can do no legs that's one of the fun ones
00:14:15
yeah they put you in some device or something they give you legs for the day they put you in what's so funny dude you
00:14:22
get you know you get you get Disney legs you get Mickey likes he's right oh they put you in a device yes you have to have
00:14:29
to transfer you from a wheelchair to a device like they they're on these rides
00:14:35
the guy has to like carry you onto the vehicle right all right but it's like the special handicap part be honest with
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me yeah okay I'll be honest if at some point in my life I lost my legs would you carry me and do that carry me to
00:14:46
places most of my weight is on my bottom half I got a big big tush you've seen it you know I'll be honest with you what I
00:14:52
would do before I did that was I would make some phone calls what were the hood to who I just went to some Japanese
00:14:57
scientists or something like just people I know that okay what's the state of the art stuff you have who can fix me yeah like no I mean stuff that like you know
00:15:04
that's not even on the market oh you want you want like the [ __ ] off menu [ __ ] yeah I mean I wanna I wanna help I
00:15:10
love you so I just you know I would never carry you that's what it is I don't think I would
00:15:17
ever carry you but like I would first call and go what's the future [ __ ] they got it right now the million dollar man
00:15:22
oh oh see that stuff Japanese robot suit yeah I'll get you that goddamn Japanese are so good they're the best they're the
00:15:29
[ __ ] greatest look at them what haven't they thought of look at that so that's helping paralyzed people walk
00:15:35
yeah that's a [ __ ] amazing that's amazing dude damn Japanese they did it again to the [ __ ] basket they did it
00:15:40
again they did it again dude he's carrying see that could be you in my robot legs carrying me upstairs
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this could be us but you plan yeah I'm not gonna do that man it's all good would you do it for me 100 you know
00:15:53
what you would that's what makes me mad no what makes me why don't you call people [ __ ] around you [ __ ] you dude
00:16:00
pull the pull the guys would I do it for Bobby Pete vote Yes or no no be honest though he is
00:16:05
uh he's never here I would say for a day okay for the day thank you Pete's never
00:16:11
here but I will take the yes for a day Carlos I think Andrew would thank you Carlos McCone for the rest of my life
00:16:18
yeah I actually think so okay let me let me make an argument let
00:16:23
me make an argument Carlos right what is he ever here who are you talking
00:16:28
about you I [ __ ] live here you're always somewhere Paris Hawaii in
00:16:35
a golf tournament somewhere then you would come with me somewhere you would come with me no you wouldn't invite me
00:16:42
dude I would love to help me now when you have your fancy [ __ ] friend parties and you know why why because of this kind of stuff you're overreacting I
00:16:48
can't have this happen in front of [ __ ] Jason Momoa when Momoa and I are whittling a canoe I can't have this kind
00:16:54
of behavior go down but you know what I'm saying he's never here to so what I'm going to end up doing is call ring ring oh dude I'm in [ __ ]
00:17:01
Mazatlan where's that I love Mazatlan Mexico yeah I'm in Mazatlan I go okay
00:17:07
what are you back oh you August uh in America I think he would do it thank you
00:17:13
if he's in town maybe one time a month that's more than you that's more than
00:17:19
you that's a lot because I'm being thank you I'm being completely and utterly honest with you I would dedicate it one
00:17:25
day a week to you when I'm in town and I would not you wouldn't get a single date for me that's fine that's the
00:17:31
relationship that we have but you know what I would do I would call Japanese people I would get I would pay for the
00:17:38
finest equipment okay right and I would hook it all up I'll call Lex Friedman let's figure this out right you would
00:17:45
never [ __ ] call for me no because I would just do the labor myself we're just two different types of guys yeah but it's the same thing no no I'm gonna
00:17:52
dig this is just as good as yours sure I'm not devaluing you I'm just saying I would carry you I already said I
00:17:57
wouldn't approve that I would and I would buy you the future [ __ ] okay fine this is it you show you show your love
00:18:02
languages buying gifts and mine is doing physics now we're getting somewhere your love language is here yeah and mine is
00:18:08
I'm gonna do for you now yeah it's gifts That's My love language to you am I what what is it acts of service acts of
00:18:15
service yes that's my life look at that that is awesome that's all that is is 4 700 I thought that would be so much money for some reason I thought it'd be
00:18:21
like 50 Grand look at that thing you can't carry heavy [ __ ] with it it's awesome can we buy one of those for the
00:18:26
show just for fun yeah we should do it just in case something happens and one of us loses limbs or you know what we
00:18:31
could do put Brad Williams in that I don't think you need this for that oh yeah he's taller
00:18:37
he would be taller put him in that I see what you're saying I thought you meant I mean that's another thing they should come out with stilts mechanical stilts
00:18:43
for little people don't they have that already I don't think so well he's got those extenders on his car for his pedals but it'd be
00:18:50
weird if he had long legs and still his little arms you know what I mean that would be weird oh yeah these are just
00:18:55
they're not mechanical right this is for that's that's just a step in that man's
00:19:01
house that's a step stool Jesus Christ Carlos they don't have it they don't they don't have it I mean looking I went
00:19:07
looking for a house today I went house shopping nice not gonna not gonna get it why
00:19:12
um we didn't like it because the woman's showing it oh yeah that's a big thing yeah I love
00:19:18
the house and then she you know well she's flaky just a little Asian girl and I just I was like no chance okay I can't
00:19:24
buy from an Asian no we just didn't know the house didn't uh no it just wasn't right we don't know we're gonna we don't
00:19:30
know we're gonna bulldoze our house and just leave oh really I think I'm gonna light my I like your house I think I'm gonna set it on fire I'm dead serious
00:19:36
collect the insurance and get out of town yeah I mean me and Coletta were looking for houses we went to a house and we had this old black man as a
00:19:42
realtor and your business manager no no and he was walking backwards so on this
00:19:48
side you know I mean we have a new fireplace but there was a step like two steps but he was walking backwards and
00:19:55
he fell on his back and he didn't move and me and color was just like okay thank you get in the car get in the car
00:20:01
get in the car it was so weird he could still be there right now this is just skeleton tell me this if you if
00:20:08
you knew for a fact somebody died in the house would you still buy it well you know you know I used to live on
00:20:14
uh um 10 55 not 1050 yeah Sanborn Beyond Sanborn John Sanborn and that brick
00:20:20
building that I lived in you know um Charlie Chaplin yeah I remember he used
00:20:25
to have it own an insane asylum there no it was a what I thought it was a halfway house it was an insane asylum at one
00:20:32
point wait really yeah I thought it was for drug addict this is what I heard and then um then some when
00:20:39
I moved in they're like yeah see on that floor right there some kid killed himself jumped off that floor and he you
00:20:46
know those are the two things so late at night you know you know I care you know I mean but
00:20:51
Charlie Charlie oh yeah imagine Charlie saw someone kill himself but he's from the silent film there he
00:20:57
he couldn't say anything that's right all right somebody jumps in Charlie's like all right
00:21:05
yeah imagine here this is me trying to communicate to the cops that somebody feels so funny today ready you're the
00:21:11
cops you're the cops show up on the murder scene at Charlie Chaplin's house and I'm him all right
00:21:19
hi Oh Mr Chaplin I'm a huge yeah so
00:21:25
so um yeah so there's a young man's body in the front can you tell me
00:21:31
can you tell me what happened yeah uh he walked up the stairs yeah wait
00:21:38
wait he's he's praying oh he's crying oh he jumps
00:21:43
off and there's blood scored again with something wow wow you know did you you
00:21:49
were in a great mind I would have mined myself to the top see if I'm doing it yeah go right okay
00:21:55
let me see I think a great mind you you can see what they're doing by their hand movements well that's literally what
00:22:00
they need to do yeah what do you mean that's that's the one thing you need as a mime is hands yeah okay so here we go
00:22:06
our trans friend from Tick Tock could not be a good time what am I doing okay here we go
00:22:12
taking a [ __ ] oh climbing a rope climbing a rope climbing a dick climbing Jack In the Beanstalk
00:22:19
climbing a draft deck climbing I was close I got there I got there I got there very good dude all right uh I'm
00:22:24
I'm uh okay yeah I'm a mime all right ready what am I doing ready yeah
00:22:31
oh I I know okay
00:22:38
you at you were cooking on a at a barbecue right and then you realize there's no meat so now you have to go to
00:22:45
the store I am dead serious right now dude yeah I know I was a terrorist that
00:22:52
hijacked a plane but it looked the same but it looked really similar in hockney what is incognate I will tell
00:22:59
you what it is it reaches out to data Brokers on your behalf requests your personal data removal and deals with any
00:23:06
objections from their side through an automated process this is pretty incredible because your stuff is all over the Internet you a lot of people by
00:23:12
the way get these spam calls these Robo calls you know I get this constantly I get it literally three times a day and
00:23:19
these intrusions occur because data Brokers compile information about you from public records the apps that you use and the websites you visit right
00:23:25
they collect all that stuff like the zuckerbergs of the world and they sell it to everybody to use all right well
00:23:31
that's where incogni comes in uh you can protect your privacy with them in three easy steps I did it it's incredible you
00:23:37
create an account and tell them whose personal data needs to be removed you can grant them the right to work for you they contract data Brokers on your
00:23:44
behalf and request your personal data to be taken off it's great because your stuff is out there whether you know it
00:23:49
or not and we want to protect our bad friends family Bobby tell them how they get it right now the first hundred of
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our listeners will get 60 off incognate wow all you have to do is go to incogni.com bad friends and use code bad
00:24:03
friends to save on a cockney today that's incogni i n c o g n i.com slash
00:24:09
bad friends and use code bad friends to save 60 today but act fast because this offer is only good for the first 100
00:24:15
listeners ZocDoc have you ever been on the hunt for a new doctor Andrew yeah always and you ask literally everyone
00:24:20
you know for their Reco right you I asked you and you didn't give me any recommendations yeah anyway you know a
00:24:26
doctor who actually gets you listens to you and makes you feel super comfortable that's what I need that's my friend
00:24:31
ZocDoc can get it done look uh when we moved to the new neighborhood I was searching I didn't know who to turn to
00:24:37
because I didn't have any friends in the area thank you very much to ZocDoc as I was able to get on ZocDoc and find a
00:24:45
bunch of different people to choose from made it nice and easy and convenient they're great doctors who actually have
00:24:50
amazing reviews with many appointments available within 24 hours you can turn right around and go right into the doctor pretty quickly it's amazing
00:24:56
ZocDoc is of course a free app where you can find amazing doctors and book appointments online we're talking about booking appointments with thousands of
00:25:03
top-rated patient review doctors and Specialists you can filter specifically uh for ones who take your insurance and
00:25:09
are located near you and treat almost any condition you're searching for how do we do this you got to go to zocdoc.com the bad friends and download
00:25:16
the ZocDoc app for free then find and book a top-rated doctor today you've heard of it you know it it works so very
00:25:22
well you're looking for a doctor that is zocdoc.com zocdoc.com bad friends zocdoc.com bad
00:25:30
friends because I went like this I was flying the plane but I do get it yeah but
00:25:35
that's not flying a plane how do they fly this is how they fly but you were doing this well he's steering through
00:25:41
the air yeah no because they're Rams around clouds is that what you're doing I don't
00:25:48
know what this was I imagine Birds oh Bird yeah oh I see I see if you
00:25:55
look at this look at me if I'm a pilot and or if I'm a terrorist and I'm crashing the plane you don't just hold and go straight I'm sure you want to
00:26:01
just do one of these like yeah you know what I mean and you were kind of doing this well he's gripping for Life yeah they White Knuckles they have some
00:26:07
flares can I ask you a real sensitive don't put your hand like that yeah I'm doing it again about 9 11. please you
00:26:12
know if you miss do you get another turnaround chance no the other guy has
00:26:19
to do it right but I'm just saying that would be a bummer can you imagine if he's like you've spent a year in Flight School you [ __ ] up
00:26:26
[Laughter] I mean you would be like okay
00:26:32
can you imagine they get over the PA system they're like we have to land the plane safely we missed our Targets this
00:26:39
is our Target they have to land safely because they missed the target would be so [ __ ] that's such a good sketch wow
00:26:44
that's such a funny idea dark but sorry and anyone a victim of 911 will never forget
00:26:49
well they're not the victim you mean the people in the building whatever
00:26:54
we'll never forget we'll never forget and we won't we'll never we won't and we do apologize it was terrible it was oh the mining was great thank you
00:27:01
um you wanna do another one or no no with you no with McCown what the [ __ ]
00:27:08
you're talking about I don't want to do with McConnell yeah let me ask you another question about mines I don't know I don't know anything about them is
00:27:14
there a famous mime who's the world what I'm saying is I think that I think it's a dead genre performance a dead art form
00:27:21
oh barcel Marcel right he's the one oh legendary around he survived the Nazi occupation and said he saved many
00:27:26
children in World War II regarded by his peers style pantomime moving audiences without uttering a
00:27:32
single word into how he survived what pretend he was a wall
00:27:42
and just soldiers just walking by you know what I mean you know when they know
00:27:47
you know what he did he was the first guy to do you know the guy in the park who paints himself the still statue during World War II he was just a statue
00:27:54
yeah yeah is he dead how yeah he's got it yeah what do I mean World War II what
00:27:59
am I talking about holy [ __ ] go to his Wikipedia Marcel Marcel
00:28:05
I want to know I want to know what his his Arrow was I don't know anything about the guy he died in 2007 not that
00:28:13
long oh we could have met him and he died in kahoor's France but what a lot what a long life how did
00:28:19
he have two lives what do you mean two wives for as a mime pretty good I'd be hard-pressed to find a mind with
00:28:25
one wife yeah how do you get him what do you mean listen can I be honest with you I know
00:28:31
you're doing a joke right now but
00:28:38
I've never seen dude I've never seen you do that just now you know what you just did uh-huh
00:28:45
he did he did a comedy Wing a little comedy wink that was so good because
00:28:51
I've seen him do that before on stage it's so quick it lets me know let's just
00:28:56
go with it let's go with it yeah did you did you just notice that I see him do him yeah yeah let me see if I can do a
00:29:02
comedy Wing give me one oh no if you don't keep acknowledging it after it's over what do you mean because you went like this
00:29:07
look because I imagine I was on stage I know but you do it and keep going all right so I'm on stage right yeah
00:29:15
yes is that good that's good but it looked a little flirtatious that's the problem if you did that in a girl saw
00:29:20
that she might go I'm looking at you what the [ __ ] you're talking about I'm a girl in the audience oh I didn't know yeah I'm a girl in the
00:29:27
audience oh you're a girl in the audience I am but I'm wicking at you so where are you on the scenario I'm backstage waiting to go
00:29:34
on so why would I went to anybody because it's all for sex.com
00:29:39
no you know what I would give you a sexual link if you're a girl in the audience I am a girl in the audience go ahead let me see the difference so
00:29:45
anyway yeah my papa no no no no no no no no I [ __ ] it up I've never done a
00:29:52
sexual Wing before do a sexual Wing to me I'm on stage you're you're a hot chick in the audience ready
00:29:58
yeah and so I'm back home uh in the Midwest and uh that was kind of like that yeah
00:30:04
yeah yeah I just imitated you yeah dude that's hot yeah winking is cool man
00:30:09
you are cool man what's that oh my God hold on before you show this
00:30:16
this is a clip that we saw that happened here in Long Beach
00:30:22
I just want to know what side you're on just want to tell just ask just just asking you what side you're on Carlos let's see it well before you even play
00:30:28
it I gotta get my head straight get your head straight this is a a test this is a real new a real test I'm gonna put some
00:30:34
dip in my mouth and I'm gonna really focus you gotta focus on what what's going on let me ask you something could
00:30:40
I go either way you might yeah and if if I go the wrong
00:30:45
way is that bad there is no wrong way right Carlos no wrong or right way there is no right or wrong I love challenges like this and let me put the dip in my
00:30:52
mouth and I have another challenge for you after this one's over I love challenges and puzzles you love puzzles I love puzzles all right let's see which
00:30:58
here we go who would you choose where would you choose a Long Beach California homeowner says he has no regrets after
00:31:06
shooting and killing an unarmed woman who said she was pregnant when the time
00:31:11
comes to defend yourself you best do something the words of the 80 year old homeowner who confronted two robbers I
00:31:18
walked in on them and they down me they jumped on me in the hallway but Tom Greer says he managed to get his 22
00:31:25
caliber Smith and Wesson revolver he says when that unarmed couple saw his gun they took off and he followed the
00:31:33
lady didn't run fast as a man so I shot her the back twice she's dead and it's all her off and he
00:31:40
got away she says don't show me I'm pregnant I'm a baby and I shot her anyway Greer says he has no regrets and
00:31:46
has a warning for the alleged partner in crime still wanted tonight I shot her so
00:31:51
that's going to leave a message on his mind it's [ __ ] insane
00:31:57
this guy this guy is like
00:32:03
it's insane it's awesome that he's like I don't even understand let me ask you something is is it so they went into his
00:32:10
house they broke in they were robbing him I agree I'm saying but if you listen
00:32:15
closely he goes she couldn't run as fast as the man so I shot her in the back it was [ __ ] this is also information
00:32:22
that he could have kept to himself he shouldn't have said that why is he's incriminating himself yeah it's like no
00:32:29
she she ran as fast right and she had this crazy look in her eyes he literally go she said don't shoot me I'm pregnant
00:32:35
I didn't care I shot her anyway twice twice look how old I am twice that's
00:32:41
insane dude all right who shot him on man uh you can't break into people's houses
00:32:47
so okay you're on the old man's side I I don't know if killing them is the right thing move just shoot her in the legs
00:32:54
there we go yeah shoot her in the legs yeah shoot to injure not shoot to kill I mean that's insane I mean by the way
00:33:00
he's so Brazen he couldn't care less he couldn't and at the end the woman's like Long Beach police are still looking into
00:33:06
it what else do you need to look into he literally was like they broke in I shot and killed her there's the case so so
00:33:11
you think it you think he shouldn't go to prison he's gonna go to prison for sure in the state of California which
00:33:17
we're in you cannot you cannot shoot to kill on your own property this isn't Texas you guys have shoot to kill laws
00:33:22
right can't you four to two if someone's on your property in Texas somebody breaks in his parents house they can shoot him and kill him we can't do that
00:33:28
in state of California you should be able to yeah this place is [ __ ] insane there's also a defense like self-defense Clauses in Florida where no
00:33:35
no we have self-defense here right but you you can't just shoot and kill someone that's on your property I think
00:33:40
it's unless they're shooting and trying to kill you I think that's it if it's self-defense if they're shooting it but
00:33:46
she didn't have guns he had he would they were they had they were unarmed yeah I wonder when it is but I know in
00:33:53
California the laws are so [ __ ] weird here here they are you can use proportional Force when you reasonably believe that you're an imminent danger
00:33:59
of physical harm and force is necessary to stop it you can use deadly force if you reasonably believe it's necessary to stop an imminent danger of death so
00:34:04
there number two if you're good yeah if they're TR if you're if they're stabbing you trying to kill you you can kill them in self-defense but if they don't have a
00:34:11
gun you can't just shoot to kill on your property here in interesting in Texas these people don't even need a reason if
00:34:17
you step on their property yeah they show you the gun and say I can kill you and they can wow [ __ ] Bonkers I love
00:34:23
it well remember as a kid you'd ride a bike somewhere something you'd be on someone's property sometimes yeah it would happen all the [ __ ] time well
00:34:29
your baseball goes under the backyard I used to sneak in the backyard please and then you break into their house and steal something that happens all the
00:34:34
time yeah there was a guy named Mr Kettleman who owned a big piece of land out by my mom's house and he had a tire
00:34:42
swing he had he had probably like three four acres of land and he had a big tire swing uh from one of these old [ __ ]
00:34:48
huge oak trees and nobody he had no [ __ ] young kids that live there and he wouldn't let anybody play on it so
00:34:54
we'd wait till his truck was gone and then we'd go play on it right and he caught us one time and legitimately yelled that he was gonna [ __ ] kill us
00:35:01
we were kids we laughed it off now as an adult I thought he probably was gonna go get a gun and shoot and kill us wow but
00:35:07
he but he was a psycho old guy and was like don't [ __ ] come on my [ __ ] property he was like dude it's a tire
00:35:13
swing it's that is kids want to be in that yeah what the [ __ ] do you think you have it for then I realized he went to
00:35:20
Epstein's Island oh I see that's where he would go when he would leave I see I see
00:35:27
it was a trap there was a pile of leaves underneath and you would fall in and it would have would have been a great business
00:35:33
building playgrounds for Epstein Island oh my God imagine
00:35:40
so much money so much so rich what are you looking at flight logs oh my God I've seen flight logs he
00:35:46
does this all the time you know when some people listen are there names of people that are manifested people on it of course like
00:35:53
who's on it that we know that we know personally no just in in the public domain I was gonna say famous
00:36:00
people who are on the flight log so you can Google it I'm pretty sure it's like Bill Clinton I um there's a couple people we know that
00:36:06
are on there jessal Nick I think was on there I'm
00:36:12
there you go prince Andrew Alan dershowitz Emily Taylor Sarah Kellen I don't know these names I know Bill
00:36:18
Clinton I know dershow was he's a lawyer yeah Naomi Campbell Stephen Hawking wait Stephen Hawking yeah there we go
00:36:24
Stephen Hawking that's insane you think had a fun fact I want to go to the island why won't you let me go let
00:36:32
me go do you think he had fun though oh I had a blast one of the best times of my life I mean
00:36:39
what'd you do there Stephen ate a lot of good food hung out with good friends
00:36:44
oh there he is amazing there he is on the island what's so funny that's insane somebody
00:36:50
stop me somebody stop me let's get into that position position
00:36:56
he's in let's get so
00:37:02
who me just chilling me chilling too just hanging out for the day what uh
00:37:08
beautiful Island [Laughter] a butterfly has just landed on my nose
00:37:17
I mean what happens in their life that's incredible like that's an event if a butterfly
00:37:22
lands on their nose that's an event for them what does he do during the day when he's on the island oh you guys are going
00:37:28
jet skiing I'll just be here chilling he went on a tour on on a submarine
00:37:36
actually of the island yeah that's little St James that's the Island Tour yeah wow
00:37:42
my God how creepy is that dude he was married twice Stephen Hawking is married multiple
00:37:47
times right yeah in that movie he like he like left his wife for some girl he met while he was
00:37:53
in [ __ ] grad school isn't that what it was how many times he married look that up click that yeah there you go married twice wow married to two chicks
00:38:01
wow Stephen Hawk was married to Jane Wilde for 30 years and Elaine Mason for 12. the longest marriage was 30 years to
00:38:07
Jane Wilde and then he left her and did he have a lot of money I guess right I don't know how did he
00:38:13
make all his [ __ ] money 20 million at the time of his death yeah an author and I think he got like grants
00:38:20
to like also I think he made a lot of his money like public speaking and engagement private engagements yeah but
00:38:26
if he was able-bodied he could have made billions 100 I'm not saying that I'm not saying
00:38:32
that in a in a derogatory way but that's why God did that to him I mean imagine he's like this guy's gonna get too rich
00:38:38
yeah yeah he knows too much he knows too much that's incredible what a life he had incredible incredible and he was
00:38:44
able-bodied for 20 what 20 years right and I can't remember when it happened how old he was he was in his 20s I think what yeah when was he not
00:38:53
when did Stephen Hawking graduate school at 21 right at 21. aim [ __ ] I can't even
00:38:59
say that amyotrophic lateral sclerosis wow ALS for commonly Virginia says Lou
00:39:04
Gehrig's Disease wow incredible but he lived so long with ALS
00:39:10
right yeah he had a slow Progressive form says you guys when I was a kid
00:39:16
I um had a Duran Duran poster on my wall yeah and it got ripped apart in months
00:39:22
and it and and it was it stayed up there for years it looked terrible yeah but now we have this this is the future guys
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00:39:54
friends designs like this look at this how cool is this we have a bunch of different bad friends up there that you can see some of it is uh uh based on the
00:40:00
time of year we put out uh specials for the holidays and also just regular old school cool bad friends art that we've
00:40:06
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little sleeping bag like a little tiny rollout bag that was incredible I could pack it up right away also came with a
00:41:06
foldable chair that fit like this like in my hands you could sit in it even my big butt could sit in it uh the box of
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awesome has so much cool fun stuff to get started it's well it's the best for presents
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it is really cool if you want to give it for someone else or just for yourself and be a little selfish how do you get started how do you get started to get
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box box of awesome.com code bad friends you believe Jimmy Carter's still alive I
00:42:02
can't even see I've been like Googling every day still is today he's still alive you know what's gonna happen we've
00:42:08
done that on we've done this on this show yeah when we start talking about someone they die do you know this this happened on the show multiple times I'm
00:42:13
not kidding people have said that we've talked about someone like this and they've passed it with like okay let's you know who it was
00:42:20
you know who was [ __ ] you just did that to PeeWee Herman PeeWee Herman Alex Trebek we talked about on the show one
00:42:26
time and then like a week later he [ __ ] died sons of [ __ ] well it wasn't us you [ __ ] [ __ ] okay let's
00:42:33
do an experiment right now exactly all right McCone McCone
00:42:39
yeah that'd be too it would be a disaster somebody who's older who's old
00:42:45
how about this in the next year Mitch McConnell Mitch McConnell yeah
00:42:51
he's so close he's so close yeah by the way he's only 81 that's not that
00:42:57
old but he looks wrecked when you see him fall asleep when he robotically
00:43:02
passes out in the middle of a speech yeah yeah it's the [ __ ] weirdest thing I've ever seen I know he's gonna you think he's gonna go I think
00:43:09
Feinstein's gonna go yeah but that's that's obviously oh okay any second now Mitch McConnell so you think he's out
00:43:16
I think in the next year maybe this has changed my perspective about age because I watched that life in the blue zones
00:43:21
documentary on Netflix okay I want to watch him what is it it's on it's the highest concentrations around the world
00:43:27
of the people that are Centenary that are older than 100. dude there are these people in [ __ ] Okinawa in Japan yeah
00:43:33
I've heard I know about that they look like they're 70 and they're a hundred years old and let me guess why because
00:43:38
they're Japanese no that's not why not why yes it is no because in Tokyo it's not the same rate I'll tell you why I
00:43:44
know what it is what is tell me well first of all that's what the whole documentary is about I'll tell you what it is what is it diet yes that's part of
00:43:51
it okay there's tons of things Community yes correct right so Community diet
00:43:57
community and they're Japanese that's right those are three things so I'll tell you what the Common Thread is of
00:44:02
all these but faith they all believe in something by the way it's a Blue Zone in Japan there's one in
00:44:09
Italy there's one he does around the world there's one here in Loma Linda California has the highest concentration
00:44:15
of centarians centurians
00:44:23
another thing about them is in Okinawa is that like old men and women they do
00:44:29
traditional fishing so they'll go out in the ocean or Spearfish and do activities like that yes they're constantly active
00:44:36
well here's the other thing though about all these places yeah diet spirituality they all believe in something they're all different faiths
00:44:42
so they believe in something right right Community family and they grow their own
00:44:48
[ __ ] food they grow their almost all these places Harvest their [ __ ] and they make [ __ ] by hand in Mexico
00:44:55
there was a spot I mean no not no sorry Costa Rica there was a spot they make everything by hand so this old
00:45:02
Rolling Stone she was making tortillas she's like how old he's like how old is the stone she's like I don't know it was
00:45:08
my mother's mother so this Stone has made tattias for [ __ ] hundreds of years not us we go to [ __ ]
00:45:15
we go to Uncle Paul at least in order I know you know six thousand sandwiches two of them yeah calorie sandwich and
00:45:21
they're so good this this they're the best they don't have this in [ __ ] Okinawa they make that that they they
00:45:26
all work at a at a vape Factory right we do we gotta change our dude bad
00:45:33
friends have to we have to change the way we live our lives nope yes I don't
00:45:38
want to get to 100. that's nuts but it's not just that it's quality of life it's there they they're peaceful yes and
00:45:45
Serene you're right like last night at two in the morning I went into a conniption fit
00:45:52
because there's a bug on Starfield right and it's like I'm already like 60 I've
00:45:58
been playing all day every day and there's a bug and it's set online that I have to start over no yeah and I was
00:46:04
like oh my God oh my God
00:46:11
I was like two in the morning I didn't even know what to do
00:46:16
and that's they don't do that in Okinawa no they don't they don't do it they do not yeah yeah and I have to change you
00:46:23
do we do yeah I do it's ridiculous last night I'm 52 years old you know I mean I'm [ __ ] freaking out
00:46:30
like that but think about it like this if you change then you can get to 100 you're only halfway through that's incredible 50 more years yeah I was I
00:46:37
was when people die I always go okay hold over there there were eighty and then I always look back where was I 30
00:46:43
years ago because I'm 52. 20 and then I go from 20 to now how long
00:46:48
was that and that was a long time long time so I kind of it makes that makes me relieved you got a long time left buddy
00:46:54
yeah but when you're somebody like Argus Hamilton you know the comic he's older yeah he's a 70 right early 70 something
00:47:00
I don't know right maybe that window is shorter I mean how does that I don't even know how you live but he's lived a
00:47:06
great [ __ ] life he's lived a long glorious life right on The Tonight Show more than anybody else 72 years old I
00:47:13
mean he and he and by the way still killing it at the store having a great time writing new [ __ ] every [ __ ] day
00:47:18
loving life is always polite and sweet and nice and funny so he I love him so
00:47:24
by the way he might say dude I've lived a full life I'll go when I go I'll go whenever the [ __ ] I go yeah one of the
00:47:31
guys in one of the guys on the documentary was so funny he's like how do you feel about living to be a hundred and he's like I don't know if
00:47:37
God forgot to kill me that's funny I love when they're funny God forgot to kill me yeah yeah we need more
00:47:43
vegetables more fruits less Dairy less sugar hmm it's like no meat on all these diets
00:47:49
no meat either well this I see that's not true because some of the places did have me but it was limited meat yeah I
00:47:54
say limited me but this helped me I watched this because I'm reading this book from my back and I feel
00:48:00
so different the past couple of days you're using a different method huh I do still holistic I gotta tell well yeah
00:48:06
you see the cupping the cupping marks on my back incredible I went to acupuncture I'm doing holistic and I read this book
00:48:12
that I suggest called the way out the way out the way out it's [ __ ] that
00:48:17
one right there the way out uh man it's so [ __ ] good and so that
00:48:23
you've been applying the rules and the way out things yeah so I was listening to it in the car
00:48:28
um I listened to the audiobook and holy [ __ ] [ __ ] it like changed my
00:48:34
life it's [ __ ] insane I'm like annoyed because he talks about being a skeptic he goes you're probably a
00:48:41
skeptic he's like saying this to me in the car now and I'm like yup as I'm driving yeah you probably think I can't
00:48:46
fix your pain I go you [ __ ] nailed it Bud yeah cause I'm writhing in pain most days as I'm driving I'm in so much pain
00:48:53
yeah and then he teaches you these steps it takes a long time to get into do you have to listen all the storytelling and
00:48:59
he gives you a lot of background and Exposition give me two steps when you have pain in your body yeah because it's physical pain is what he's talking about
00:49:05
so one of the things that he teaches there is this thing it's called um neuroplastic pain which means
00:49:13
it's pains that when your body is healed right your body's already healed your your brain has still been you your brain
00:49:19
is confused thinking these signals are still there and there's pain but you're healed so the arm's not broken but you're still feeling stuff maybe right
00:49:25
neuroplastic pain he said a high percentage of these cases they found people that are in heavy pain throughout
00:49:30
their life chronic pain it's neuroplastic it's kind of fabricated wow and this some of this this is I'm doing
00:49:36
an Abridged version but one of the steps is they teach you how to sit and almost
00:49:43
meditate thinking about literally the pain you're in pain thinking about the
00:49:48
pain and he takes you different steps about how you are thinking about the pain where it's moving in your body is
00:49:54
it shaping is it shifting through your body does it feel like fire is it pins so he's talking to you about what the
00:50:00
pain is doing and how it's doing it and how your brain is relearning itself to
00:50:05
go this is okay I don't have fear of this fear causes more pain if I'd have
00:50:11
no fear of the pain it's not there yeah and you're literally reprogramming your
00:50:16
[ __ ] brain to remove fear of the pain that is coming it's going to get worse it'll never get fixed it might come
00:50:22
again tomorrow morning it happens every time at 7 pm fear fear fear fear and you're [ __ ] sucking the fear out of
00:50:28
your brain and honestly dude it's changed my [ __ ] life I couldn't recommend that book more it's wild you
00:50:33
could apply it to everything in your life so can you stop can you stop think about the thing
00:50:38
that's making you mad sad or hurt and can you really dig in why am I in pain why am I sad why is this hurting me
00:50:46
physically or mentally and you reprogram your mind to slowly pull away the fear and pull
00:50:53
away the or yeah you can take Vicodin you can take Vicodin either one you
00:50:59
could yeah you could do that I'm Vicodin I saw you judging me think I I love you looking at me but it's interesting it's
00:51:04
psychological like if you've seen old Samurai movies yeah right right yeah
00:51:09
they're in a battle yeah one man versus one man
00:51:15
they pull out the [ __ ] thing right and then an arm will slice off and
00:51:21
they'll smile right it's psychological through the
00:51:29
stomach you'll pull it out yeah yes right yes and they keep going head
00:51:36
falls off puts it back on puts it back on they say that right
00:51:45
and then once he kills the guy he just Falls and dies it's amazing all
00:51:51
Samurai movies are like that it's in the mind it's in the mind this thing helped me out tremendously it's actually for
00:51:57
life as well that's what the book is about how do you ex how do you sit in it yeah feel it you got to feel
00:52:04
it gotta [ __ ] feel it sounds psychedelic it's dope as [ __ ] I can tell you that I'm [ __ ] in love with it so
00:52:10
are you is the pain subsiding yeah I mean you seem like because I've
00:52:16
never I haven't seen you like this in months when I pulled up you open the door and you had a smile on your body
00:52:22
yeah I had never seen anything big smile face yeah the pain the pain comes and goes but I'm learning to [ __ ] it off
00:52:30
[ __ ] [ __ ] it out get the [ __ ] out of here wow get the [ __ ] out of here I don't really need to read the book then
00:52:35
because I'm not in pain you're not okay but I'll tell you I want to tell this one story real fast that they talk about in the book this is one of the greatest
00:52:41
tricks of all time they try to find out how prevalent um neuroplastic pain is and they took
00:52:48
these case studies and they did this a bunch of different ways a bunch of different times this one's the most interesting to me by far this is incredible
00:52:53
scientifically there is no such thing as chronic Whiplash right like people
00:52:59
that get into car accidents they'll say I got whiplash it's a diagnosis for either a bruising or a aggravation of
00:53:05
the muscles or the tendons right this happens a lot people getting like little fender mothers and they say oh well what you're experiencing is whiplash when
00:53:10
they go to the doctor right they get pills and most people are fine in a couple of weeks some people say they experience remnants of the Whiplash days
00:53:17
months years down the road it comes back right they did this study to find out because
00:53:23
it's been proven that Whiplash chronic Whiplash doesn't exist once the neck is healed that thing that you're thinking
00:53:28
is the pain it's not that's not true it's there is nothing there harboring it
00:53:33
so they put all these people in a car in a [ __ ] test facility
00:53:39
and they jolted the car a little bit just a little bit like an inch not even anything crashed a bunch of glass and
00:53:45
stuff and had lights and sound loud heavy sound to emulate a car crash
00:53:51
all of these people thought they had whiplash all of them wow there was no
00:53:56
accident they barely moved in like this like this an inch in their seats so all
00:54:01
of them reported feeling the thing saying I got whiplash yeah 100 and 68 of
00:54:07
these [ __ ] people said they had physical effects from the Whiplash days weeks later
00:54:12
yeah when they told them never happen these people were befuddled they were
00:54:18
like I was in the accident like no you weren't we'll show you the footage it never happened all of them all of them
00:54:23
said oh yeah I guess no I don't really I guess I don't oh is it nothing is it the
00:54:28
same as like experiencing trauma as a child huh you know how you experience
00:54:34
trauma as a child and then years later you're in a scenario that seems similar you meet somebody that reminds you of
00:54:39
your dad or whatever and all those things come back up is is it the same Theory there or not because you're
00:54:45
psychologically telling yourself that that's the reality there was a guy there's one more quick story there was a
00:54:50
guy who was a worker at a construction site he stepped on a [ __ ] nail the nail went right through his boot everybody saw it he was thriving in pain
00:54:58
pulled the [ __ ] pulled pulled his boot up and the nail was in the boot and they and they he he was grabbing his leg
00:55:05
they took him to the hospital they took off his Boot and they found out
00:55:11
or they cut the boot the nail went right through his toes right through didn't
00:55:16
puncture anything no blood no nothing he himself was like wow I was sure that I
00:55:22
was stabbed I felt it I felt it go through my foot he felt it go through his toes he assumed this is it so
00:55:29
psychologically this is an example in the book they say of like the brain is so [ __ ] powerful it made this man
00:55:36
think he was stabbed in the [ __ ] foot he felt the pain in his leg like he was stabbed yeah I've seen a test where like
00:55:43
they put like you hide your arm or whatever and they put a fake arm yes right and they smacked it with a hand
00:55:49
right right yeah and you think you feel it yeah yeah you think you feel it it's so weird what the book is saying is that
00:55:55
pain exists it's just a lot of pain is neuroplastic that we've we've exacerbated because we've tricked our
00:56:00
brain into thinking this is how we should be suffering from the pain and feeling from the pain so then your body reacts accordingly you
00:56:07
overcompensate right and it's wild it's it's what the mind can do is amazing is
00:56:14
incredible like even like when I you know talk to Young Comics I was telling Angie this we were having dinner and she
00:56:20
goes like how do you do it this and Angie that didn't go to your party yeah yeah that one she's a young comic and I
00:56:26
go and I go you know I'll be honest with you like I'm literally the laziest dude you'll ever meet I can vouch for that
00:56:33
that's not a bad thing not at all right I've never done anything right so the
00:56:38
two things I've done is I've always shown up yeah so I've gone on stage you see him at the clock you show up I show
00:56:44
up to auditions and stuff like that right unless you have to cancel and number two there is a belief
00:56:50
I've always believed that I was funny and talented was gonna make it yeah did
00:56:56
you you believed it too and you yeah no you've believed in yourself be honest not all the time no Jess you can't have that 24 hours a day
00:57:04
but I'm just saying for the majority of the part really deep inside I just knew that I you had something this is the
00:57:10
right direction this is you know and and it was gonna all work out and I visualized the way I think I wanted my
00:57:15
life to be and it just kind of slowly fell into place yeah you know I mean it's a lot of it's mental it's
00:57:21
psychological man it is I don't know that word people throw that around I don't know if I want to use that word okay but it is what word did he throw
00:57:27
manifestation Oh I thought he said the n-word I thought that's what you're throwing around yeah that's why you said they throw that around a lot yeah oh my
00:57:33
God what's going on here well I want to show you something yeah uh McCone sent me this now by the way you want to get you want macone to be on your [ __ ] list
00:57:39
more McCone sent this to me and he goes Bobby's gotta see this okay wow you did
00:57:44
that yeah okay this is a dude this is a this is a real thing show them
00:57:52
lid lifts for babies this is a real thing that they do lid
00:57:57
lifting and it works look at you what do you mean well it works on you
00:58:04
oh you think without that I would just be skin over my eyes well didn't you talk didn't you get lid lifted no dude I
00:58:10
think that's they're doing that so that the kids get around their eyes no I have no idea why do they do lid lifting in
00:58:17
Japan yeah why do they do that uh lid lifting with tape in Japan though but you know it is in
00:58:24
Japan that was yeah yeah yeah lid lifting but famous eye glue they do eye glue I mean it it's definitely just to
00:58:31
look more Western I don't know what they were doing I have no idea I figure that's why we brought it in to see if
00:58:36
maybe you had an answer Bob well sankapool yeah is a operation that um my mom got and all my uncles and aunts
00:58:43
sonkapul in Korean is sankapuru and sangapo is an eye operation to make my
00:58:48
mom got the eye operation so she can look more Western are you serious I swear to God
00:58:53
or
00:59:00
right there yeah sankapu see so Sun Sun paku yeah
00:59:11
significant white part is visible so sankapu eyes means so they there's a physical surgery that people do in Korea
00:59:17
all my uncles and you know also they used to do in the 70s Not only would they get sankapul sanpaku they would get
00:59:23
their hair permed the men is that a two for one can you get that done at the same time yeah so they all look like
00:59:28
what's that Bob the painter yeah Bob Ross
00:59:36
yeah yeah I mean it was crazy because like one year I was I'd be a kid I would
00:59:41
look at my Uncle Han right and I go hi Uncle Han literally a year later I he came back he didn't live in our city
00:59:47
yeah I saw him again I did not recognize him son but he did have a canvas and some paint so and he kept going Happy
00:59:55
Trees yeah but my mom goes uh when you're older I kept sunker for free I
01:00:01
don't want it so how old was your mom when she got sanpaku in her 20s late 20s
01:00:06
but you don't you're why would you do it it makes a complete difference but your
01:00:12
eyes are big no they're not your eyes are as big as my eyes what's wrong oh no I was seeing if he
01:00:18
had sankapoo eyes he does not yeah yeah yeah no it would wait do I have oh no
01:00:23
the sun sunpaku is just three sides of the eyes or what so it's just that's a word for bigger eyes he has a bigger
01:00:29
eyes yeah but Asians don't have that a lot so they get the surgery how do you know
01:00:35
uh racial profiling um uh yeah yeah wait you're look at me your eyes are the same size as mine my
01:00:40
eyes are as open as your eyes I don't think so dude I don't have big eyes I don't have big eyes then you need something let's get it together then
01:00:47
yeah we'll just get it together but I refuse to do it like I refuse to do I make my I was like Mom I don't want to
01:00:52
look like white people no and she's like you become more except dude I'm like you
01:00:57
can't get more accepted than you are I'm like but yeah because things change but I guess in the 70s right it was maybe maybe it was like a
01:01:04
there's a some sort of pressure that they had but here's the thing with doing a lot of stuff to your face and your eyes I saw a girl
01:01:12
today that had a lot of stuff done and she was like maybe 25 years old and you're like you're not even face isn't
01:01:18
even done yet you know like I don't think your face is done until you're like 30. once you had 30 your face kind
01:01:24
of is what it is for the rest of your [ __ ] life and why is it when they get the old ladies and like if you go to Beverly Hills you see like a bunch of 50
01:01:29
year old 60 year old ladies with all the bowties they all look like Benedict Cumberbatch
01:01:36
don't they they look like Benedict Cumberbatch especially if they have short hair yeah
01:01:41
no so this is a woman who had sanpaku so there we go what's better that looks identical what's the difference the
01:01:47
white under the eye I like the before yeah me too I think that that's how her face is supposed to
01:01:53
look yeah I like the before too it's weird God made you perfect that's not Korean that's Filipino it looks like no
01:01:59
give me a Korean person with sankapool God made you perfect the way you are I always felt that about myself that's how
01:02:05
I feel I don't follow that K-pop stars do it all the time oh wow yeah look at them they do it all the time and this
01:02:11
one says somebody and eyes mean
01:02:17
s-a-m-b-a-b-e-a-g-a-n somebody again what is that what does that indicate oh it's like a Superstition maybe oh it
01:02:24
means ill-fated individuals the sampaku eyes are considered ill-fated and destined for a life filled with Misfortune well that's why I didn't get
01:02:30
it done baby yeah whoa and look at your mom she's filled with Misfortune we call her really well we call her Misfortune
01:02:37
if you look at my mom's mouth there's so much Misfortune in that I'm being real in your mom's eyes no in her life yeah
01:02:43
because yeah you're you're [ __ ] Dad yeah raising YouTube you know what happened you know I told you the aunt
01:02:49
story huh dude I I can't believe I've never told the story before what wait did it's [ __ ] insane what is it
01:02:56
so during the Korean War why are you slapping Macon he knocked the thing over uh okay
01:03:05
he likes physical yeah he really does like frat stuff well here let me let me throw something at his head yeah
01:03:14
so when my mom so you know I've been to my um mother's house where she grew up
01:03:19
and it's on this hill it's Generations live there it was in a part of Seoul live a residential
01:03:25
district but during the Korean War you'd have I remember this winding road that came down so they lived on top of this
01:03:31
you know there was like four or five houses on top of this hill and you had to walk down this thing and my mom's job
01:03:37
during the Korean war was to walk my her little sister my Aunt to to school right
01:03:43
what's up anyway and so one day they were walking down the thing and then my mom forgot like a book
01:03:49
she told my Aunt stay here I'm gonna go run and get the my book and
01:03:55
when she came back this is terrible a military truck had whizzed around the corner and ran over my on am I
01:04:04
Carlos what what
01:04:09
dude and I said was it an American Truck no it was like
01:04:16
a Korean military truck but here's the worst part there's worse oh way worse okay way
01:04:22
worse so it was this is why my I don't know why my mom would describe this in detail but we did do it as her let me
01:04:29
hear it as your mom so I come down the puppy I calm down you know one side of
01:04:35
the street her head outside the street her leg
01:04:40
oh and then on the middle row everything inside all right I go oh no
01:04:48
I don't know what to do this it's awful different so I Ram up I run
01:04:54
back up I tell your uncle right that you know Auntie or my sister she did so they
01:05:03
had to take a empty rice burger no yeah no yeah yeah we had to emptier that's a
01:05:11
bag I was like you guys have lunch what the [ __ ] you talking about they threw away good food
01:05:18
so they took these bags and because there's no ambulancer in the war this is the what 50s yeah right and they they
01:05:26
ran down and they had to pick up parts of my aunt oh my God put it in the rice
01:05:32
bag and then my mom goes for years you know I could never sleep
01:05:38
yeah no [ __ ] no [ __ ] I go no [ __ ] how does she still eat rice I know
01:05:45
right so um and then she comes to America and she meets my dad who's like
01:05:51
violent abusive alcoholic abuse of rageaholic so she would get beat by him right so she and if I guess God knew
01:06:01
that she was gonna get the operation God gave her sanpaku maybe I don't know wow
01:06:06
but it was a tough life and um that's insane it's a tough life yeah what can we do to make your mother's years now
01:06:13
more better what can we do she's she right now is living her best life
01:06:19
good because she doesn't have to be with my dad she doesn't have to worry about money because I you know can we find her
01:06:26
out love no she's she doesn't want that no I don't mean sexually I just mean a companion
01:06:32
well my brother was just out there for two weeks that's not what I'm talking about I don't know she doesn't she's
01:06:37
like you remember when she was at the Arizona show yeah and her and I were
01:06:42
sitting on the couch and we and she was we're just I got on our gadgets shoes on her iPad you were on your iPhone iPhone
01:06:47
right that's she's that's it that's she's content but I mean like don't you think she
01:06:54
could benefit from a companion because she goes in the morning she goes to exercise she doesn't like people in that way right she doesn't no some
01:07:01
people it would be a do you think do you think you're that way could you when you get older just be alone and you're okay
01:07:06
with being alone no because I um I don't think that I've experienced the kind of trauma that she
01:07:13
has I also think you're you love love you love I do love companionship yeah I
01:07:18
I need it could you be alone Carlos for the rest of your life yeah yeah you could I can't believe I never told you that story before I thought you said
01:07:24
your aunt uh I know you said your aunt died but I thought she I had a well first of all you know I have 28 first
01:07:30
cousins 28. I know and I have a bunch of uncles and aunts and they're all dead no
01:07:35
they're a lot of them are alive would anybody else die tragically at the hands of a military truck
01:07:44
Petey could you be alone in your remaining years of life oh no hell no yeah I know you need a companion I need
01:07:50
someone yeah and McCone you don't get to answer you couldn't be alone he likes he's he's
01:07:56
a little sweetie pie too he likes love he loves love but the one thing about my mom this is serious and I've I've like
01:08:03
I've called people and she's got a great ass that I want to say it is plump that dump
01:08:11
is plump is I've I I call I talked to my
01:08:16
therapist and I go is there anyone that you know that speaks Korean a therapist right and she didn't know any and you
01:08:23
know I mean there's got to be that online you gotta Google Korean therapists in Phoenix in Phoenix Google Korean therapist in Phoenix
01:08:30
yeah I would I wish you would do that find Korean therapist and psychologist in Arizona there you know but let's find
01:08:37
her one let's get her someone to talk to we can pay for it yeah I would like her to do that but but I've I brought it up and she's like
01:08:45
let's go through do you want Soul key oh John is hot all right that's not do they speak Korean though yes so key is
01:08:51
[ __ ] her profile's in Korean Jesus yeah you're right you're right I'm gonna ask my mom if she's she's willing
01:08:58
save the profile I'm dead serious save this so we might not be willing though call her and ask
01:09:04
call your mom and ask it's for the show I don't want to bother her but okay hold on tell you're with me
01:09:10
she loves me she does love me dude whenever I talk to her she's excited to hear me she's gonna
01:09:16
go no she's gonna watch watch she's gonna be so like what are you talking about it's 125. I'll tell you I know I'm
01:09:22
just saying okay 125 per session yeah we can we'll bed friends will pay for it
01:09:28
I like how she answers she goes
01:09:35
oh yeah I'm here I'm in L.A how are you I'm fine what are
01:09:41
you doing what are you doing I said la are you awesome
01:09:48
um you're on bad friends right now you're don't worry about it but um me and me
01:09:56
and Andrew want to know if did would you ever want a therapy
01:10:03
I mean just if you want to feel do you feel good I mean you know sometimes I'm under the weather
01:10:09
you know it's just one day no but how about your sadness are you sad or no no
01:10:15
you're never sad that's like I never said you're super happy
01:10:20
super happy reminder I'm super happy okay good if but if we
01:10:28
got you a therapist would you talk to someone who's who speaks Korean
01:10:38
in Gilbert and I was I was wondering if you ever wanted therapy that we could get you her
01:10:45
remember one time you want to try because you know outside I'm happy maybe
01:10:51
inside I'm not I know I just because I feel like you don't talk to people about your feelings and your emotions and how
01:10:56
you feel I I can do it we all do therapy we love it we're going to try it we all do therapy we're gonna try it with her
01:11:02
because you know because you know why I bring it up because we talked about remember your little sister
01:11:11
don't speak Korean try to speak English
01:11:17
yo what happened hi the way she was uh okay okay it's
01:11:24
fine but anyway I love you Mom I miss you I miss you
01:11:32
I miss you too okay ask if she misses me do you miss Ed do you miss Andrew
01:11:37
anytime no that's our cousin you know my friend Andrew the redheaded guy
01:11:45
you remember Andrew right yeah she does do you miss him or no
01:11:51
oh yes very much I love you I love you Mom
01:11:57
cry okay all right so if you ever need help I'm here okay
01:12:02
okay think about it I'll pay for I pay for it sometimes I'm thinking maybe after they're gone you
01:12:09
know baby I I don't feel uh in I don't express maybe inside I am you know yeah
01:12:15
yeah I really I really want you to see a therapist and she speaks full Korean this lady
01:12:21
oh really yes so let me know if I can set it up okay English I kinetic stress but I can do
01:12:30
you know yeah yeah I really let's try it one time what do you think yes just one
01:12:35
thing okay okay all right I love y'all I'm gonna hook it up okay okay bye
01:12:43
I love you I love you too I'm so [ __ ] excited this is this is hard for
01:12:48
bringing it up well why would you say it I was just kidding I know because you were saying bring it up no I didn't mean
01:12:54
it it was for the show I was joking for you yeah but I thought she can't hear me you can hear me he went at me I did it
01:13:00
it was a little comedy wink I gave you a comedy wink by the way you know we grew up the same way in that right I Irish
01:13:06
people we just don't yeah Irish Catholics just don't talk about stuff they push it away it didn't exist it's
01:13:13
okay uh it happened dark [ __ ] that happened to someone like if a kid died
01:13:18
or something tragic and we just don't they don't talk about it so we grew up in that same world of like don't don't
01:13:24
worry about it don't worry about it but we're gonna blow up an English building what the [ __ ] you're talking about
01:13:30
he knows there's something about Irish Catholics yeah they just don't well I mean they drink away their feelings
01:13:36
there's something there's something about like the Irish and the Asians they built the railroads from the beginning I
01:13:42
think we're bonded from you're we're bonded then remember you're my best oh you're my best friend hey you're my best
01:13:47
friend thank you for being a bad friend [Music]

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  • 65
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  • 60
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Episode Highlights

  • Party Drama Unfolds
    Tensions rise as friends discuss being left out of a party. 'Interesting move, interesting move.'
    “Interesting move, interesting move.”
    @ 03m 13s
    September 25, 2023
  • Inspiring TikTok Star
    A discussion about a trans woman with no limbs who creates hilarious content. 'How amazing is this? No limbs and she can swim!'
    “How amazing is this? No limbs and she can swim!”
    @ 09m 18s
    September 25, 2023
  • ZocDoc Saves the Day
    Finding a doctor made easy with ZocDoc, which offers quick appointments and great reviews.
    “ZocDoc is a free app where you can find amazing doctors and book appointments online.”
    @ 24m 56s
    September 25, 2023
  • The Mime's Legacy
    Discussion about the legendary mime Marcel Marceau and his impact during WWII.
    “He was the first guy to do you know the guy in the park who paints himself the still statue.”
    @ 27m 47s
    September 25, 2023
  • Homeowner's Regret
    An 80-year-old homeowner shares his chilling decision after shooting an unarmed woman during a robbery.
    “I shot her anyway twice.”
    @ 31m 40s
    September 25, 2023
  • Living to 100: The Okinawa Secret
    Exploring the lifestyle factors that contribute to longevity in Okinawa, Japan.
    “They look like they're 70 and they're 100 years old.”
    @ 43m 33s
    September 25, 2023
  • Neuroplastic Pain: A Mind Over Matter Approach
    Discussing how the brain can create pain even when the body is healed.
    “Pain exists; it's just a lot of pain is neuroplastic.”
    @ 56m 00s
    September 25, 2023
  • The Power of Belief in Success
    How believing in oneself can lead to achieving dreams and goals.
    “I've always believed that I was funny and talented.”
    @ 56m 50s
    September 25, 2023
  • Aunt's Tragic Story
    Aunt's tragic past involves picking up parts of family during war.
    “Oh my God, put it in the rice bag.”
    @ 01h 05m 26s
    September 25, 2023
  • Mother's Happiness
    Despite a tough past, she now lives her best life without her abusive husband.
    “Good because she doesn't have to be with my dad.”
    @ 01h 06m 19s
    September 25, 2023
  • Therapy for Mom
    A conversation about finding a Korean-speaking therapist for the mother.
    “I really want you to see a therapist.”
    @ 01h 12m 15s
    September 25, 2023

Episode Quotes

  • I want Macon to be sexually assaulted by dogs!
    A Bone To Pick With Bobby's Mom | Ep 185 | Bad Friends
  • Can you imagine they get over the PA system...
    A Bone To Pick With Bobby's Mom | Ep 185 | Bad Friends
  • I shot her anyway twice.
    A Bone To Pick With Bobby's Mom | Ep 185 | Bad Friends
  • It's not just that, it's quality of life.
    A Bone To Pick With Bobby's Mom | Ep 185 | Bad Friends
  • The mind can do amazing things.
    A Bone To Pick With Bobby's Mom | Ep 185 | Bad Friends
  • It's a tough life, yeah, what can we do?
    A Bone To Pick With Bobby's Mom | Ep 185 | Bad Friends

Key Moments

  • Party Exclusion00:47
  • Zombie Apocalypse03:43
  • Inspiring Woman09:18
  • ZocDoc24:56
  • Blue Zones43:27
  • Cultural Beauty Standards58:31
  • Trauma and Food1:05:11
  • Seeking Help1:12:15

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown

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