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An Egg Roll Goes to the Spa & Stealing Danny DeVito's Seat | Ep 101 | Bad Friends

January 31, 2022 / 01:15:01

This episode features Bobby Lee and Chappelle Lacy discussing various topics including personal anecdotes, comedy experiences, and their friendship dynamics. They share humorous stories about their lives, including a memorable trip to a Korean spa and their experiences in stand-up comedy.

Bobby and Chappelle reflect on their first encounters and the chemistry they felt, with Chappelle recalling a time when Bobby invited him to a spa. They discuss the awkwardness of being naked in a spa setting and share laughs about their experiences there.

The conversation shifts to their stand-up careers, with Chappelle sharing how he got into comedy after being inspired by a friend. They talk about the challenges of performing and the feelings associated with bombing on stage.

Throughout the episode, they touch on personal growth, the importance of trying in comedy, and their shared experiences as comedians. Jules, the producer, also contributes to the conversation, sharing her thoughts on various topics.

The episode concludes with light-hearted banter and reflections on their friendship, showcasing the camaraderie and humor that defines their dynamic.

TL;DR

Bobby Lee and Chappelle Lacy share comedic stories about their friendship, stand-up experiences, and a memorable trip to a Korean spa.

Episode

1:15:01
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you two are bad friends you are these two idiots white dude i'm an asian dude
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you two are disgusting well you two or something we're bad friends
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i don't need how old is this water bottle give him a fresh one man oh this is this is new yes okay okay yeah but we don't
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do ghetto you think this is get it do you think this is more better than king of the state we're fighting the
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king dude seriously what yeah i understand i understand you're on a thin line right
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now i'm just saying okay okay the thin why are you pointing at me
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because the thin rope is very clear to me my friend what do you mean what are you doing wait wait wait think about what you're about to say i think about
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everything about this all i know is that you you
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are like worm tongue worm tongue
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everyone i want everyone i want because he ate a worm no that could be but everyone just everyone
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say this worm tongue that i you know i take a pitch to that i take offense to them who's warm tongue i
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take a few who's that what who is it it's the dude in a
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game of thrones no yeah remember he was the one that
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[ __ ] mesmerized the king but he was like putting him in a combo toast and then and then the [ __ ] white gang
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gandhi yeah gandhi showed up with a stick that was gandalf whatever no yeah
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with the stick right so he is a manipulator right and he goes and then like he has the staff right and he goes
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you back up and he puts up the staff and it takes the king out of the now now and then your warm tongue you know what you
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are what about that's my turn what am i what you are in lord of the rings though no no no no no no this is my own analogy
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i can come i can come up with my own movie analogy yeah because you are you started with that you guys alright
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you know what you are you're the actual dark crystal where you extract people's
00:01:55
energy like when the podlings look into the dark crystals yeah you know yeah and you are the actual dark crystal you
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extract people's positive energy and negative and negative energy yeah
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the dark crystal sucks in right negative energy positive energy right but also cancers
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[Laughter] for some reason when i hear chemo i just think green okay so radiation you know
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what you are then no well dude let's not do this what let's start more on a positive can we start again oh let's
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start let's start again let's start again keep it but let's just be more positive let's do it we
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we start with the bad friends like i'll introduce it but let's do positive affirmation right chappelle yeah i'm all about
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positive positives that's my world bro about your world dude yeah i'm going to say something about your world dude what
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are you going to say about my world but i never saw anyone like you before uh-huh right you know how you and i when
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we met there was some chemistry and a light but why do you but what i'm saying is that i had never
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met anyone like you that's why i didn't get close until i saw the show cheer then i go i see
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he this guy jules here on netflix he's a cheerleader i i was he was he was a cheerleader you
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know the schools that they're talking about on cheer that's where i cheered at really yeah that's the actual school yeah that's
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right that's what you shoot at yeah because i knew that about you you were pro at that level yeah at that at one
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point so when i was watching cheer i thought about you you i good there he is you really did yeah it's basically he
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what chappelle lacy is he seems like a guy that was adopted
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dude you better watch what i'm about to say no because i don't like where you're getting at whenever i saw when i met you i go [ __ ] number one you were wearing a
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ramones i don't have a remote shirt okay well you were wearing cramps cramps cramps noses oh see how he
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fabricates and lies no no oh no fabrications
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i love the ramones but i would never wear a ramon shirt i'm like that weirdo that's how cool you are michael at the
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end of this podcast yeah is to prove to the world that you ain't with him
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no no no no no you you're with me no one hundred percent brother with me
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no no no no no what we like in terms of style in terms of what we think is good in terms of film television skateboard
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hey but here's here's another thing i seen his dick you know what what i kind of do want to
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because i feel close to you yeah i liked you right when i met you i would like to show you my my balls and my penis
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that's a lot was that what would you be calling like i've cheered with gay dudes and they've never said anything like that to me
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they have never looked at me and go yo i love you and like he's the lead dude i
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can't help it like your toe teachers are the [ __ ] yeah but yo can i show you my dick and balls
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it's crazy it's crazy so no one's ever done that but when you ask right you already lose what do you mean what
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do you mean by that when you may i can i you know what may i show you my genitals
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already you lose what you do is you go there's rules there's rules in my head i'm like i know i can see the twinkle in
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his eyes when i met you i knew you when you looked at me dude you you did this you looked at my eyes
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and you did a downward glance and popped right back up wait dude do it so this is yeah so i go hey i'm bobby i go and she
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pale right do i talk like that to media i'm japan right anyone like that
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we do you did when i saw that you did that when i saw that i went
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there it is and when you saw it in a good way and when you saw it i think you reacted
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in the worst kind of way i think you ran away no and there was a point no wasn't there a time wasn't this how you would
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avoid me you know what it was you ready for this yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah okay i want to hear it i've just moved to l.a
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okay just moved to l.a i'm hanging around the comedy store right and i had met bobby already but it was
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maybe like a few weeks of me living into l.a yeah it was literally weeks and then he was like yo after my set let's go get
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something to eat you know what's being said does it mean another comment does it sound normal yeah yeah yeah you do that he was like let's go
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no anyone well that's you human beings eat yeah no but you really are nice to uh other comedians we go to ag
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agassi agassi we go to agassi great meal great meal then we say he probably is
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just dropping all this dope knowledge about comedy i'm feeling good it's cool i'm in l.a i'm like dude i'm hanging out
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with bobby lee and literally he was like we're hanging out outside he goes hey you wanna
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you know there's a spa
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[Laughter]
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it's good so he goes there's a spa
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you know i usually take a lot of comics too it's a late night spa oh you know and i'd only brought one black eye dot
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spot before you who was it who else would go with me oh ian edwards yeah yeah it was ian and it's so funny
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whenever i when i brought him i think you did the same thing when i brought ian there he found basketball shorts no no no no i
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did not you did it looked like i was completely naked i looked around i go oh [ __ ] chappelle's
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doing what [ __ ] ian did they're they're wearing they found basketball shorts somewhere because they don't want to show that you know i know what it is it's respectful it's a korean spa and
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you don't want to go to the steam room and you're going to freak out the koreans don't listen this is not what he did
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and you are and i would be scared because you're sensitive like i am i'm very sensitive and you and i would be in
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a foxhole probably yeah right i'd probably show you my thing yeah because i want to show you what it looks like
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when it's super scared right and in war in war my penis
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looks like this yeah like that but that's what that's not what it was
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in the spa you
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i was like all right and so we go in he goes he goes don't look around he goes just pick a locker put your clothes in
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there and i'm like what you all my clothes he was like yeah that's just a spa you got to get naked
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yeah and i'm sitting here like oh no i was walking around like that then we go on this dude then we go in
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the sauna and we're sitting there in the sauna wet one uh the dry one
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we're sending a sauna me and the other dude were just sitting on the bench bobby is like dropping comedy knowledge
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to us and meanwhile he's doing high kicks in the sauna and i'm sitting here like
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how do you want me to [ __ ] take you serious it did dude the the best part of it it
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was when after we were done in the spa for like an hour or so he goes he drops us off at a 7-eleven
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he dropped us off so quick like he just like dropped and then left and i'm like it's so funny the details that was why
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let me see the details the details it's like the details you missed the details the details is probably who who paid for augustine
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he paid for augustine who paid for the spa he paid for the spot yes he did interesting he did well what did his
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penis look like to you his yeah you know this was almost three years or no this was three years dude
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he's got a dark dick he's got a dark dark and he's just like kicking his highs like his leg gets up there oh yeah
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i was
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yes that's exactly what it is [Music]
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a week later i went back to the spa and the koreans were talking about you no no
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he said you're you said they're complimenting your dick saying what does it look like yeah it's uh gishing like a ghost creature like a
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creature like a ghost creature like a ghost creature yeah i think it's creatures is ghost ghost oh ghost
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[Music] no you got an average dick don't you
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yeah yeah this is average yeah you know what i
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no because i do actually like i've done exercises to stretch it out over the years i think i think i think i i think i
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could match you yo steve yeah yeah yeah yeah i think i can match him now i think i could i think that's the thing
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it's not a thing here's the thing about your brother yeah
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i i always you're the most honest man i think i know exactly so that's why i'm like you say
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that yeah no you didn't must be my friend in college said i promise you this chappelle okay
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think about it if you i'm thinking about i already thought about it if you're in medical school right i can see this happening right a bunch of kids right
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are in a conference room right they're putting up slides yeah right before the test just warm up yeah they throw out
00:12:23
things what's this they go oh that's some sort of skin you know rash thing right and they show his penis they
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wouldn't think they wouldn't say penis they'd go oh that's a skin tag on somebody's neck
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jules has not said what can we let let's go
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let me ask you to say something jules right when you hear adults how old are you
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chappelle i'm i'll be 35 on sunday okay is that an adult yeah yeah holy steve
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holy man 47 47. i'm 50 right
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jewels do you think this is not what we should be talking about right now
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from what i've heard with you and your friends due to bobby i think it's normal
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it's normal talk so it doesn't make you feel uncomfortable no so let's play a little quick game and
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just make assumptions okay okay just in your mind if you were gonna do biggest to smallest just out of
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assumptions just go one two three a point and then that's it and then we can move on okay
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okay you gotta go ahead one yeah two three
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okay you know she's right she no she's not right no because you're because you're fat no i'm just letting you know the fat
00:14:06
on your stomach the fat in your stomach over probably is overlapping your dick at this point you
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know what is happening no because you're yeah let me see something like if i'm a man i
00:14:18
have a house right and the rooftop right if the rooftop is big it still has
00:14:23
nothing to do with my situation no i'm just saying the placement of your penis is probably like down like way near your
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anus so it's not getting the light yeah probably that's why it's gray it's not getting the sunlight but what does
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that have to do with size i don't know but i'm trying to figure that out
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hold on why don't you think about it yeah can we ask him to
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think yeah yeah yeah yeah you're right you're right think about it so that's a lesson we do this as just to find this is just a
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friendly gesture i'm not sure we're not trying to do it we're not trying to let's after this let's all go to the
00:15:02
spot together no i no no we can't why not you get spot [ __ ] to do you got [ __ ]
00:15:07
to do i got a lot of [ __ ] you wouldn't go to the spa game with us ever again you wouldn't but that was a wild experience you wouldn't go with me
00:15:14
how long have you did you know bobby before i invited you to the spa weeks weeks yeah like not even not even
00:15:20
not even four months probably one or two weeks okay i've known him for over 10 years
00:15:25
not one invite to the spa oh okay so what now now let's now that says something about you man yeah that
00:15:32
says something about you that's just you why me and why not george he only invites funny people no it's not that um
00:15:38
let's see let's see um why should i invite um a podcast producer
00:15:43
you mean or should i potentially a kid that could be the next eddie murphy yeah
00:15:50
dude that was a compliment bro that was a compliment come on i'm sorry george yeah i mean
00:15:55
basically i mean i tried to do that it's just basically common sense dog yeah i try to defend you hey i'm getting into
00:16:01
prop comedy i'll i'll come back yeah yeah yeah i'm probably banned from there anyway i can't go back what
00:16:06
to the spa yeah i apologize for the poo again from at the grove what do you mean the pool then when i pooed on the in the
00:16:13
parking lot what i've been thinking about that lately i apologize what that was not for your for a younger brother to witness an
00:16:20
older brother to poo in a parking lot is i just thought about it it's not right but bobby they have bathrooms at
00:16:26
the grove didn't have time they should have one in every corner like they should have a
00:16:31
they should have a a parking spot and then a bathroom stall and a parking spot you know what one
00:16:36
thing i will never understand is how adults [ __ ] their pants
00:16:42
oh dude this wasn't even [ __ ] his wasn't even [ __ ] it was pure liquid it was like yoo-hoo you know the yuhu
00:16:48
chocolate drink all right it looked like that hold up it looked like that like just a huge pond i need the detail bobby
00:16:55
upon chappelle do you date what do you date i you know i feel like you don't [ __ ]
00:17:01
oh my god [Laughter] dude are you out of your mind
00:17:07
i love it is this how this goes oh okay all right what he does it's so funny because this is this is the exact
00:17:13
conversation i expected coming to you really yeah no so wait do i [ __ ] no i'm
00:17:20
not saying oh god man it's just you know it's all about it it's all about language and i said it
00:17:25
wrong all right yeah i'll let you try again oh thank you when i look at chappelle lacey right
00:17:32
yeah obviously right since he does eat food
00:17:38
sleep because he looks like he's existing he's not dying right and i'm
00:17:44
sure he does get sexual intercourse occasionally on the road or whatnot right but in my head i can't really see
00:17:51
it right you making love to any woman no you're wrong that's interesting that
00:17:57
that but that's a fair thing to say thank you you want to know why that's fair why because i'm not i don't give
00:18:02
off those those vibes at all i don't give off those vibes he is he he is right he doesn't maybe maybe he is my
00:18:08
guy i don't know if you're my guy anymore maybe he's cause you you out here thinking i just [ __ ]
00:18:15
and bobby's like no you know no yeah i i uh you're not you're not the type of guy right one i have a girlfriend and two
00:18:23
she's alive yeah
00:18:28
i assume when you make a heavy love right when you make a heavy love that you're
00:18:34
the type of guy to look at your girl and go would you like a warm towel yeah you go get a warm
00:18:40
towel a fresh one right yeah you in fact you might go to the [ __ ] the actual
00:18:45
closet to get a folded one yeah not a used one not a used one yeah put the warm water on 100 yeah me damn you know
00:18:53
me i know dude how long
00:19:01
majority of people like don't know where to take me but you know exactly that's
00:19:06
why you took me to the spa that's right i know you dude you're sensitive baby you invited me and you have yeah i get
00:19:13
it so crazy so i'm not this i'm not that one guy i'm like a mystery to most you know what i do when they go when i'm making love don't make a love
00:19:19
you want to clean she goes yeah
00:19:25
and they use their hand at that point i'm already sleeping
00:19:32
after the spirit of fall asleep that's that's your world yeah that's my world so how did you how did you know
00:19:41
yeah yeah thank you you know you know why i'm that way why it's because of cheerleading really can you can you please do this do
00:19:48
a demonstration yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah type in [Music]
00:20:04
wow dude that was you legit that's him dude that's cgi oh what
00:20:09
oh my god dude yeah that's legit dude once upon a time look at it
00:20:19
oh my god dude can you do a flip yeah i can't even do one flip look at
00:20:24
that yeah you know what the leaves are we're not flippers we're rollers
00:20:30
oh that's we don't flip we roll better than you we roll like a [ __ ] don't we in a perfect ball dude yeah in fact can
00:20:36
i see something when we wrestled right when we did the roll that was your move what do they used to call that the egg
00:20:42
roll yeah yeah so i made up a rule i made it i made a boat move in wrestling
00:20:47
that the the coach branstad are called the egg roll no toretto oh dead yeah al toretto i'll try to call me yeah yeah
00:20:53
and basically what it is hold up let's go ahead you're good you've seen it you've seen it once we're gonna see more of it yeah i want to see you want to
00:20:59
demonstrate okay yeah [Music]
00:21:06
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00:22:31
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00:22:38
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00:23:58
oh
00:24:31
yeah like this right yeah or something i'll get out like this okay right
00:24:36
with the egg roll away no but you you did you did you're missing the point go ahead get back down you you would you would literally
00:24:43
no yo stevie
00:24:54
[Laughter]
00:25:13
why is that so funny wait hold on why is that so funny chappelle why is that so funny dude what
00:25:18
was that funny looking no it's just his egg anyway it's fine so my brother used to do this thing oh
00:25:25
yeah yeah yeah go back i want to do
00:25:37
i'm going to i'm going to describe it for you okay so
00:25:42
my brother was ranked probably the number one guy in california second in the california
00:25:49
second okay that's what he told me yeah yeah but my brother would go to oklahoma i
00:25:55
remember and he'd kill everybody there so my brother was very good so every year my brother even as a freshman was in varsity or no
00:26:02
yeah he lettered as a freshman dude oh wow and i wrestled all my high school never
00:26:07
got a letterman jacket he got in his freshman year all right so my brother was a champion they would put in the papers they would
00:26:13
write articles about them and then in california not just local like in the california like newspapers
00:26:20
big ones but you're missing a big point so every year my brother would win the cif cif title right and and so what
00:26:27
happens is when you go to the [ __ ] auditorium they show the mat in this big auditorium
00:26:32
right and they have tunnels uh-huh and they would put smoke out and my brother would they'd say
00:26:51
right absolutely one night my brother was cif my brother did something oh yeah i think i remember so what my what my
00:26:57
brother did this so basically what it is is this okay let me do it let me do it you're gonna do it tomorrow
00:27:03
i was the kid
00:27:08
yeah my bro right this is an improvised move i i went like this no no you didn't do that what do i do what did you do i
00:27:14
think you did you grabbed it underneath and you grabbed his neck oh yeah yeah you snapped him back
00:27:30
yeah and the place went pneumonia dude yeah yeah i was crying but it was i don't know how i literally
00:27:37
what yeah it was the adrenaline where i went and then i i like and this was your freshman year yeah
00:27:42
this was fresh freshman year like my sophomore year and my brother every year and every tournament would
00:27:50
crush it article after article pride pride lee pride every year every year
00:27:56
senior year he goes to state and he makes shame he's shamed
00:28:01
he shamed the lee family he shamed our heritage he burned the family tree dude
00:28:07
bro i was there i drove 12 hours from sacramento in a minivan dude 12 hours back that drive back i didn't even know
00:28:14
if i had a brother then dude anyway good job though the snapback hey
00:28:19
freshman year give him a round of applause snapback freshman year dude those are skills you don't forget though
00:28:26
oh yeah but i can't i can't do it but i remember there's there's this um when i was uh in eighth or ninth grade they're
00:28:31
they they prep you right they groom you to be the next varsity 103 pounder do you remember a guy named tony matusi
00:28:39
do i remember tony matusi dude i think about him every day
00:28:48
imagine arnold schwarzenegger no no rocky mars his face is like right i know but his
00:28:53
body is his body owner sourcing everybody okay you can already go into this shrinking machine
00:28:59
right so arnold goes me yeah he goes to the shrinking machine he goes down to 98 pounds right that's
00:29:05
tony matusi dude he was a boss yes my brother like
00:29:10
he looked like robert de niro like rocky marciano just a little little rocky
00:29:16
balboa he was 40 years old he was a rock like a coal miner really yeah a a a a a
00:29:22
a a new york coal miner yeah he was no no no no the coach branch center and toretto they
00:29:29
uh they invited me after like before practice hey get your shoes and meet in
00:29:34
the in the in the wrestling room okay just to see how i would do against because he was the guy and i was and my
00:29:42
brother took him down i took him down but then i you know what he said because i kept
00:29:47
head-butting him and he goes you're just like your brother [Laughter]
00:29:59
yeah but i do like i don't even need distance bro i'll show you bro all right i don't even
00:30:05
need distance bro check this out that's your head bro oh bro [ __ ] crap you're [ __ ] i will try
00:30:12
crack your cheekbone bed i will crack your cheekbone bud but it hurts so bad right now
00:30:17
um
00:30:27
but with him he was actually um slated to wrestle varsity his senior year at 105 pounds 105. yeah 105. why do you
00:30:34
keep you know you're a winner no i'm a loser why do you keep building up sex in the
00:30:40
city oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god
00:30:47
this guy's he's on he's on top of he's doing listen
00:30:52
i really do feel like i connect with bobby now fugazi check yeah right name me one sonic youth album
00:30:59
oh uh washing machine evil uh i mean i mean that's he's so
00:31:04
cool dude he's so cool daydream nation yeah great sister yeah
00:31:10
sister's a great album dirty dirty yes great album yeah it was a very commercial but i
00:31:15
think i have a dirty shirt no i have the watch i have one more gameplay i wonder if that was it no i was wearing a i was
00:31:21
wearing sonic youth washing machines that's what it is that's what it was that's what that's what it was that's what it is
00:31:30
he doesn't like you also made a comment about it yeah i get it no you do i realize adam egan that's yeah he made a
00:31:36
comment about it that's right because i was like yo because i saw he had a sonic youth patch on his uh
00:31:42
vest and i was like yo washing machines i finally get it i know why andrew santino and i are going to are doing a
00:31:48
movie uh-huh want to give you the third lead of the movie absolutely if you answer this question correctly oh gosh
00:31:55
is this a music question yes just name me one pavement album
00:32:01
oh [ __ ] uh damn that's a tough one i'd see i know that the album i'm thinking
00:32:06
of is the one with uh it's got cut your hair on it yes [ __ ] what's the name of that album
00:32:13
abbott his favorite um pavement is wawizawi yeah that's the red one right no that's a blue one it has a little
00:32:19
like a cartoon drawing of a couple of monkeys on it i thought he liked the what the red that ready yeah that's called slanted enchanted enchanted
00:32:25
that's the one that you're thinking about but
00:32:41
why you guys have this connection why because i went to hip hop route i got into the other stuff later yeah you were
00:32:47
you guys were yeah and that's my fault like you guys you guys were more into the cool like
00:32:52
like black flag you know that route yeah yeah yeah
00:32:57
yeah and then i didn't discover that until later you [ __ ] with each other immediately because i was wearing the sonic youth shirt yeah
00:33:03
and you know this is why this is where like um maybe like i i want to be
00:33:09
more open and honest about it it's like um i think i think that you and i
00:33:14
could be very good friends because you and i have extreme similar things that we like yeah
00:33:20
um how about this i'll give you the third lead if you name me five
00:33:26
skateboarding companies oh gosh oh toy machine foundation baker birdhouse
00:33:33
[Laughter] just took one of the coolest guys ever right and this is what i'm telling you
00:33:39
jules like i forced her i forced her to watch magnolia you forrester yeah he forced you to
00:33:46
force her to watch what you think about it the the movie jules so long
00:33:52
[Music] i mean you try you try
00:33:58
i go i go look at philip seymour how often is acting yeah he was better than um
00:34:05
hunger games he's better i didn't know he was in hunger games yeah he's really good he
00:34:11
started hunger games he better hunger games oh right oh my god tom grew too much as you said tom cruise too much that was
00:34:17
a great character what a great character that motivational speech yeah yeah and then she fell asleep for half of it yeah
00:34:22
yeah let's do this with jules because you didn't let her talk a lot this episode okay go ahead jules what are your top three movies
00:34:30
no teacher bobby's gonna laugh at me no no no no i'd like to do this i promise i won't dude no five i probably have no
00:34:36
five three of your favorite that's three three i walk to remember
00:34:44
shout out to shane west you know that i know shane west yeah you know shane west yeah i do who's shane west he's he's the
00:34:50
lead in there he plays the boyfriend and that's your friend yeah a walk to rip i've never seen that wow i never saw
00:34:56
that yeah a walk that's so random that's chappelle's friend okay with like britt morris
00:35:08
um can i say
00:35:14
black widow black widow great movie do you see black widow i don't think the new one oh no i
00:35:20
haven't i haven't seen that masterpiece oh really yeah is it really good really good do you guys like it
00:35:26
oh scarlett johansson i love d i love like i swear to god it's good it's like
00:35:31
spider-man good i swear to god it's not like spider-man i swear to god it is oh really it's that good yeah i think it's
00:35:37
good it's good i think it's good okay she has one more i don't think you're gonna watch him go oh that was bad okay
00:35:42
and i i i wish you've done that to me a thousand times no i haven't oh yeah go ahead third movie
00:35:48
and then spider-man no way home
00:35:53
is that the newest one see you know i think it's a better favorite chappelle
00:35:59
i think the better question is just name me all the move you've seen because that would be the same list
00:36:06
what are you talking about she doesn't know she watches anime you do yeah she
00:36:11
watches like if i peek in a room so let's give her this option oh god
00:36:17
steve no because i want her to get involved i like yeah what she loves doing she
00:36:23
she's she writes poetry right she does improv she does improv poetry
00:36:28
she does and she does improv monologues for films if you want you want to see magic go do an improv mom give her a scenario you're
00:36:35
a lawyer and you're doing an opening statement for like somebody who got murdered at a trial she'll do it three of your favorite anime just give her
00:36:42
that okay at least give her that three of your favorite attack on titan
00:36:47
jiu-jitsu kaizen hunter hunter oh you don't know what that is i know what
00:36:52
attack on titan is so steve what grave what's your favorite monologue from attack on titan um dude
00:36:58
it's been years okay if there's a monologue if there's a monologue what would the monologue be
00:37:03
yeah they're coming
00:37:14
[Laughter]
00:37:20
attack on titan right yeah so basically he knows that some voices are a voice-over actor right
00:37:26
he's gonna have a challenging day because this is a moment this is a monologue right and and the actor the voice director
00:37:33
can't sleep the night before because you know it's a big moment and it's so secret they don't give them the sides
00:37:39
he shows up ready for your big scene they're coming
00:37:45
they're coming all right you're gonna so you you just [ __ ] up the bit oh yeah go ahead go ahead no it's all right
00:37:53
in the pit right okay the joke is for me to say they're coming okay right so when you're doing it
00:38:06
no you ruined it no don't do it again please it's funnier if you let it sit no i think it's funny
00:38:12
if you live no no no no that's not good for me though i won't be able to sleep tonight
00:38:22
give me a one minute monologue that they would do in [ __ ] that oh that'd be good what do you mean just make up a
00:38:28
marvelous you're gonna give them a minute that's what this i could do it right now well go ahead show us how it's done
00:38:35
the sanctity of not life the sanctity of life is what we all should be focusing on because we live
00:38:40
within the walls the three walls the center wall i've never been as a child i've wanted to go to the center
00:38:46
wall but they would not allow me i therefore was born within the third wall the third world war the monsters
00:38:53
came at night breached the wall ate my mother what are we gonna do as a people hide
00:39:00
power or do we fight do we fight as villagers do we fight as humans do we find it as a family
00:39:08
right that's why i'm flying now in the air yeah
00:39:27
the only way we can make this official jules what did you think of that you watch anime yeah yeah jules look at me
00:39:33
yeah you watch anime jules look at me no no no no no no no try to don't try to sway her think about it
00:39:38
steve i'm sorry but bobby was good all right good job thank you he even
00:39:44
flew in the air i flew in the air at the end of the air i'd make a choice he killed the boss the
00:39:49
sound effects you thought oh it's pablo francisco here no bobby lee harnessed it okay that's why you do tv and movies my
00:39:56
friend you got it
00:40:04
there was so much hostility behind no no there was no hostility did you feel the hostility there was no hostility
00:40:11
yeah i couldn't do the monologue you could what because i'll can i tell you why i don't know the dialogue in that but
00:40:17
here's what you do about improv okay you don't know what you're gonna say ever you just start talking
00:40:25
because once you go what am i going to say it's over it's a wrap it's a wrap right so without even thinking you have
00:40:31
to go in right so what did i say what was my opening i don't know yeah
00:40:38
that doesn't make any sense but it is a beginning of a really good model i think so too thank you yeah anyway you
00:40:45
gotta monologue jules no i don't watch a lot of anime
00:40:54
i'm in a room full of non-improvisers oh yeah can you do it no i can't do it no i
00:40:59
want to do this you can do it no no you can't do it it's anime i really [ __ ] watch tv but let's do
00:41:06
this with jules i want to know personally what it's like to live with my brother bobby lee
00:41:14
[Music]
00:41:24
you guys when i go to hawaii i have to order out a lot dude the only steve the
00:41:29
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00:41:37
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you know i mine died three years ago i looked at it and i go bye-bye but then you know what happened i got a knock on
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00:44:22
bobby just bought an air fryer and then he has been cooking stupid
00:44:30
food every night and then he doesn't clean it and so the kitchen is all messed up
00:44:36
and then when i ask him to clean it he says no
00:44:41
because i have this big house that i'm letting you sleep eat
00:44:47
and do everything so you should clean it and it's all messed up
00:44:52
i have to clean it every night okay i might even need a second here why i'm
00:44:58
so furious why i'm so no don't say think about what you're about
00:45:03
to say i didn't i'm just asking don't what are you a [ __ ] jedi master no i'm just just
00:45:09
you come be good all right okay i'm come down now okay okay
00:45:14
you little pathetic trollop
00:45:20
you're a pathetic little [ __ ] nugget huh you're a piece of [ __ ]
00:45:26
oh interesting so can i ask you a question real quick and i just want wanted one incident okay two nights ago
00:45:33
very specific right i cleaned the kitchen just stop okay
00:45:39
and then you go did auntie kalila clean the kitchen she said that and i go no i did
00:45:59
when you cleaned that i also had to clean it again because all the plates
00:46:05
had small things that you couldn't wash fruit flies yeah not fruit flies no like
00:46:10
like little stains like stains
00:46:16
there's fruit flies in all your homes fruit flies and everywhere everywhere really anywhere you live fruit flies
00:46:22
anywhere he would live through let me ask you a question [ __ ]
00:46:29
why would one have [ __ ] fruit flies [ __ ] because you don't take out the trash no i love fruit oh
00:46:35
you wanna take out the trash i love it god man don't breathe but listen there's
00:46:42
a lot of people that love fruit but i don't see fruit flies are you not eating your fruit
00:46:48
all right you [ __ ] bro i live with two jungle asians
00:46:55
right you you put a man i'll give you just take this i buy mango at the store
00:47:00
yeah right i park my car as soon as i walk i have the mango in my hand right
00:47:07
as soon as i walk through the door it's gone no open your mouth open your mouth jules
00:47:12
the seed is in her mouth no they love it they love mangoes yeah now what fruit fries what they do with the
00:47:19
seeds they put a seed just in the middle of the [ __ ] living room dude
00:47:25
because that's their culture jules you do that no i don't no i don't
00:47:30
yeah you do i don't no you do you ship head [ __ ] [ __ ] you [ __ ] you [ __ ] you we do
00:47:38
that all the time i was like well we'll be having dinner we'll be having dinner right and her and i will not say we'll just look at each other at dinner
00:47:46
[ __ ] you we hate each other damn but love just love that yeah there's love there's love
00:47:53
oh my god can i ask you this am i invited to the ufc fight tomorrow i mean i missed com going to your place and
00:47:59
watching fights are you booster [ __ ] i didn't get the booster no
00:48:07
okay if you would have got the booster 100 i want to say something right now because today
00:48:14
louie anderson died oh yeah oh god and i have to say i have to talk about it yeah
00:48:21
all right um you know this because i feel like you
00:48:26
went through the process it's hard comedy
00:48:31
it's one of the worst human environments ever i think i can't imagine any i don't
00:48:38
see any other you know i mean entertainment medium that ha that's it's as difficult acting
00:48:44
everything's hard i guess everything's fine everything's hard but comedy is especially dark yeah it gets real dark i
00:48:50
don't know i always think about that type of [ __ ] all the time because i journal like [ __ ] religiously
00:48:56
what he journals religiously will it he journals
00:49:02
so diary yeah like journals diary kinda but go ahead chappelle so you have
00:49:07
a diary yeah this [ __ ] yeah no do you have a diary yeah uh no it's a joke i don't
00:49:13
like because when guys say journal i don't say dear diary but that's what you
00:49:18
are doing i don't go dear diary do you do this ever i don't go today was hard
00:49:24
never never yet i had a difficult situation today never no i don't break it down like that you don't so never in
00:49:30
your in your diary you go um journal it's a journal i have feelings for this person and they
00:49:36
rejected it no so there's never any internal interest there's no introspection going on
00:49:42
there's a lot of introspection but it's not written like one like what like you're talking like i'm as if i'm like 13 years old
00:49:48
i know you're like i want to do the tone oh it's usually just like um
00:49:53
like okay i have a big anger problem most people don't know that what yeah i have a massive anger problem so whenever
00:50:00
something happens like if a situation is thrown my way i'll journal about how like i'm actually proud of myself that i
00:50:05
didn't react the way i normally would have yeah yeah yeah
00:50:10
yeah yeah i got an anger problem too i know he does but you breathing how do you get through the anger how do
00:50:16
i get through it yeah oh man it's sometimes it could be [ __ ] tough but i just get really silent
00:50:21
when i'm really excited when i'm really silent yeah it's like oh [ __ ] there's something wrong but would
00:50:27
you say but that that's me now back in the day you would physically slap when i saw that video of you flipping that
00:50:33
doesn't look like you yeah that looks like a ten times bigger version of what were you bigger than
00:50:39
was more slimmer slimmer he was younger he was slimmer i was shredded you were shredded yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah i didn't have a gun
00:50:46
i have a good it's you know what it's got a force whitaker vibe
00:50:56
cut that out that's what you gave me nah dude all right ghost talk because i
00:51:01
love ghost dog i'll take that and then when i said ghost i didn't mean ghost dog yeah but i knew that ghost dog would make you feel
00:51:07
better yeah how did you know yeah dude you know me too
00:51:13
i don't know i'm getting jealous now i don't know because i thought i was close to you yeah yeah but he understands
00:51:20
whitaker the fact that he said forrest whitaker and he said ghost dog and like ghost
00:51:27
songs are [ __ ] dope movies oh i got a better one than that all right on my side
00:51:33
to get you on my side all right uh lawrence fishburn in apocalypse now i
00:51:41
didn't see apocalypse now i got to see what he looks like laurence fishborn in the king of new york no no
00:51:56
so my brother thinks no wonder my brother thinks this light skinned that's it
00:52:08
you think that this body the body of cream abdul-jabbar that's what his body looks like no no give me some other
00:52:14
examples no you give me another example of an actor i want to stick with lauren's i want to stick with lawrence
00:52:20
the different skin color you know if we're going to give you another chance i'd rather use a different actor a different actor okay okay okay
00:52:27
will smith and i am legend i am legend
00:52:33
i am legend how about one i got one denzel and fences
00:52:38
i'll take that [ __ ] i'll take that that's a fair one it's a
00:52:44
fearless yep that's a fair one it's a fair one see you're giving me like like like i don't like he's giving me very
00:52:51
fair body types you're giving me like he was the best that's fair but that's not
00:52:56
fair that's that's like i mean i guess that's
00:53:03
uh chris hemsworth yeah it just doesn't make any sense that's what that's just doesn't make any sense so are we talking
00:53:09
about body type what are we talking about here body
00:53:16
in gymnastics is that what we're talking about no we're talking about current oh see i see that's where i have to
00:53:22
intervene because i thought we were going back to at his peak during his gymnastic
00:53:35
yeah try it think about it think about it yeah think about it i got another one
00:53:40
i
00:53:52
yo yo check it out dude yo del rio get any delroy
00:53:57
any delroy lindo face this is the face just no no no no no
00:54:03
don't roy lindo the harder thing that ain't happening no that ain't happening to go the harder things give me a photo
00:54:10
body photo i'll take that nah that ain't happening bro yeah nah del roy lindos i'll take
00:54:16
i'll take the other one yeah roy linda right i'll take dale roy yeah yeah go guys and this is a compliment dude
00:54:28
i need to get you on my side man because i'm jealous of your guys's thing um
00:54:34
cuba gooding jr and uh jerry maguire
00:54:42
okay but can i let's talk about yeah can i say something right now yeah and i'm about to because because the ufc is
00:54:47
tomorrow okay go down the lineup no i don't know the lineup but i only know the two but there's a a fighter
00:54:53
a mexican kid who's the champion now yeah he's a 120 brandon moreno yeah the 125 pound guy and my stun
00:55:00
you know what i'm saying today i was going i was watching the embeddeds and they go
00:55:06
brendan moreno he's pretty [ __ ] cute huh he's a cutie and she she goes
00:55:12
i know why you're saying that and i go why she goes it's so weird and gross what
00:55:19
and i go why he goes he's the mexican version of your brother
00:55:26
wow cut that out of the whole thing that's my brother
00:55:32
wow have you seen him and talk to his kids and the way he acts
00:55:38
he acts just like you no i don't he's a kid baby i don't know that's a compliment it's just a beast though is that a
00:55:44
compliment yeah anyway that's you dude really yeah
00:55:50
that's a compliment now give me a body yeah give him a body in it everyone give me a body now okay well hold up i just
00:55:56
saw the pap morita documentary
00:56:13
i'm just letting the whole world know dude that's the most
00:56:18
closest to you that i could imagine wow not only body type yeah facial structure
00:56:25
hair everything behavior behavior it's you behavior and you know it bro i wasn't gonna say that
00:56:32
you know and i'm gonna say the grandpa from three ninjas that's what i was gonna say
00:56:39
pull it up that's a good one let's do it i love that dude
00:56:44
there you go oh yeah pretty close he was a g pretty damn
00:56:51
close it's crazy dude that's a great documentary though you know more the more than miyagi have
00:56:57
you seen this documentary i haven't you know what the saddest part of it did you see the spot where he was doing that bong he's like 70 years old yeah and
00:57:04
he's smoking this bong with like all these young kids yeah and he's like at a party oh yeah right yeah he's an
00:57:10
alcoholic yeah and in my head i'm like oh i didn't know that yeah in my head i'm like it just doesn't look right or feel right
00:57:16
right yeah you know i mean like he should be like you know babysitting his grandkids yeah and going to like
00:57:22
disneyland people don't know he was a stand-up he was a stand-up he's a stand-up comedian people don't realize his career is so
00:57:29
much like mine it is it's so much his career is so much even him as a
00:57:34
person he was like the san francisco guy like this guy was born here just talk like us
00:57:40
yeah regular guys on happy days yesterday yeah yeah they cover that i never knew
00:57:46
why did you know why when he was on when pat murray was on
00:57:51
happy days asians we went holy morning yeah yeah
00:57:57
when we turned on whatever that was amazing happy day yeah and he came
00:58:02
hold up we all tp like they went crazy yeah yeah for real yeah yeah they went crazy dude
00:58:09
amazing and the reason why the next year he wasn't on the show anymore uh-huh is because the network gave him his own show oh that's right and it failed and
00:58:16
then he yeah and then they tanked it and he couldn't get back in really and tell karate kids yeah oh
00:58:23
because yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah for a minute but you have to understand that from happy days to karate kid
00:58:28
you're talking about how many years 20 years no yeah so you're right you're right what did he do
00:58:33
i know what did he do just guest starring and different things yeah it's hard man but yeah man if you want to if
00:58:39
i'm telling you right now if you want to know somebody that's very similar to bobby lee
00:58:45
what's beyond miyagi so you better take his compliment instead of mine yours was a an attack
00:58:53
yours was such a fundamental attack first of all you don't even give me an actor that's even famous
00:58:58
you go oh you know that guy that died in total recall you're like i'm the guy that died in total recall
00:59:05
yeah i had to do it in the beginning in the elevator like what the that's a damn good movie though damn good movie
00:59:11
right the original total recall right damn good [ __ ] damn good movie so in a way that
00:59:18
was a compliment i mean i can't believe i didn't kill you long
00:59:24
ago growing up i don't know no it's okay it's okay but do you remember um
00:59:31
how violent that was [Music] that's what else you have in common what
00:59:37
you had an abusive dad yeah that's right that's why i brought it up he wanted me to you know what he did you
00:59:43
know he looked at me doing what he did when he does he went he did the i think again dude i did not
00:59:49
do that you guys do have a connection i'm realizing that and i'll accept that
00:59:55
oddly enough no no you do have a special connection with him was your dad violent stepfather and was he um let me ask you something
01:00:02
okay your mother raised you then yeah i was with my well my story's kind of
01:00:08
tricky i want to know so i was with my biological mom and my stepfather right both black
01:00:13
yeah both black and my stepfather kicked me out and then i was adopted into a white family
01:00:19
well i didn't know that yeah your senior year or just in high school uh i was in high school yeah i love those liberal
01:00:27
white families that do that love yeah nothing but sandra bullock and tim mcgregor yeah i love it
01:00:34
what did they feed you bud the worst [ __ ] ever like like like life was trash
01:00:40
no really yeah they don't listen so yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah they're like super christians oh they must leave the church you weren't you had to go to church and
01:00:46
all uh no they actually at first they were pretty hard about it and then eventually they were like
01:00:53
you know you ain't going yeah yeah right but you probably didn't do drugs or drink well you weren't talking about i was i was heavy into drinking oh you
01:00:59
were yeah well beer i've been off alcohol uh almost eight years oh well which is a
01:01:06
hard liquor beer like wow yeah wild turkey put a little hair on your chest yeah yeah man damn wow i was pretty i was
01:01:13
pretty that's yeah that was my when you're flipping i didn't like anything but chappelle when you're doing
01:01:18
the flip do when when in your head i should be a comedian oh when does that happen someone dared me oh wow and i just got on stage i did and
01:01:25
i was like i'm dropping out of of of college yeah yeah my friend randy signed me up
01:01:32
so we were at a place called thomas paine coffee shop in san diego and i met this guy named randy at improv class
01:01:38
this old jewish guy he had like glasses he goes well i'm doing i'm doing stand-up now so you know
01:01:44
improv is not my thing anymore so let me go check you out she went to a coffee shop he goes up and i was so impressed
01:01:51
that he went up there he bombed but just the act of he's a guy i met in class he's now really doing it yeah he
01:01:58
decided to sign his name up and go in front of strangers at what was it like a book store it's a coffee shop okay
01:02:03
thomas came coffee thomas paine coffee shop and he gets off and as i'm saying
01:02:09
he did it man wow that impressed me oh press me how you feeling man
01:02:15
adrenaline while i'm doing that i hear bobby lee oh he signed me up oh wow and i go
01:02:23
and he goes you got to do it and it went up there and i remember the bid i did what'd you do i did a bit
01:02:29
about lsd well go ahead dude dude it's not good i'll just do it i have to stand up and do it okay yeah yeah go ahead go
01:02:35
ahead do it do it yeah okay alisti's a crazy drug man you take it man it doesn't hit you until
01:02:40
like 45 minutes later like when you take out a first year like i don't feel anything i don't feel anything
01:02:47
right until i do this so i do this right oh you did that yeah i do this a cartoon i think yeah
01:02:54
right and it's one of those ones where you think you're doing one thing but you're really doing something else oh no you think you're walking down the street
01:03:00
like this and then you do the walk right i go no one notices
01:03:05
yeah i'm good no one right but you're really walking down the street like this and you do it i do a crazy interview act
01:03:11
out no one notices are you feeling crins right now no one notices but it's still gotta laugh so you did
01:03:16
well well you're making fun of me now no no you didn't bomb though it's not about bombing or killing yeah
01:03:22
it's about going up right there yeah that's the way what people don't realize it's not about doing well
01:03:28
or doing bad god in the universe
01:03:34
what no i love this what you're clearing out the no no i love i love what you're about to do everyone listen to me right
01:03:39
now and this is a truth okay god doesn't care if you win or lose he
01:03:46
just cares if you try right is that what he said what
01:03:52
where'd you find that quote no there's no quote he's just doing that right now speaking
01:03:57
for god yeah that's yeah i shouldn't speak for god you're right
01:04:02
you forgot it's god i said but so what i'm saying though is i think yes
01:04:08
my belief is this that right right that like you get rewarded for trying
01:04:13
right it's in the trying because when you try even if you fail uh-huh especially doing stand-up oh it's
01:04:19
painful it's not painful so for me it is it's painful at first but but oh it's a bomb but yeah but but the overriding but
01:04:26
the overriding feeling when you bomb the overriding feeling when your bomb is is bad but there's an underlining feeling
01:04:32
of pride what do you mean by that for just doing it yeah really yeah you can be bummed that
01:04:37
you bomb but there's still an underlying feeling that you [ __ ] did it yeah really and that you're a man that you
01:04:44
walk through and you fire brave and you walk through the [ __ ] fire i hate anyone that doesn't walk through fire
01:04:51
but you guys haven't bombed in a long time i bomb all the time no i don't i bomb all the time no yeah i do no you
01:04:57
don't i bomb all the time no you don't no no no no no absolutely not george if you see me bomb george george
01:05:05
absolutely not even when bob thinks he bombs he does better than most people but i've seen him bomb for him i rest my
01:05:11
case so here i rest there my ball for me no your idea of bombing is like
01:05:19
i really bombed i've really bombed at the lab i really bombed
01:05:24
it was like a bad dream bomb oh you talked to me right after that yeah yeah did you see it i didn't see he we we
01:05:30
talked about it like right now did anybody ever say to you did you see bobby's brother he's
01:05:35
terrible chappelle look at me
01:05:41
that one's never seen so no one's ever said no no you can say the fact that he put that in no no no no
01:05:47
i told him why i throw the energy because i know how he thinks yeah right and everything that he's thinking right now and saying is based on his own mind
01:05:55
and how he how he funneled the experience in his own mind but it's not necessarily the
01:06:01
truth and i know this is because him and i do the same thing and that's why we get in trouble a lot
01:06:06
when we tell stories because they're not really true right they're just how we interpret it
01:06:12
we interpret it and also we also we're not willing to tell it unless it's good so how do you make a
01:06:18
story good you lie no no no no no i didn't lie about that that's exaggerating you lie all the time
01:06:24
that's you you're deflecting that's you do that i admit it can you admit it do i do that too can
01:06:29
you admit it do i do that too yeah i told you earlier i was like you're the
01:06:35
most honest man that i i think i think um i don't do that i don't do that as much
01:06:40
as you think all right so you what let's just go back to the story let's go back to the story so you think
01:06:46
i did horribly for you dude but no one in the audience
01:06:51
don't remembers not only ramirez cares they don't care
01:06:59
right you're absolutely right nobody cares no one cares you know what now i think about they probably don't really
01:07:04
remember they don't they never even thought about it yeah but you spend you spend days and weeks
01:07:11
in yourself i'm still thinking about something that never happened i'm still thinking about it but it's insanity still thinking about it yeah
01:07:17
i haven't gone up since ago or weeks ago a month like a month i
01:07:23
haven't gone up in a month yeah but i'm doing guest spots with yeah i'm doing guest spots soon so i'm going to go back up okay
01:07:29
because if you don't no no no i am but this is the thing let me finish because if you don't
01:07:35
look at me right now because if you don't look at me right now look at him you're a [ __ ] coward oh i know i'm
01:07:41
not i don't want to be no all right that same face that i'm not going to do that starface right there
01:07:47
that's what got me into no this is the reason why you said and this is the reason why because i realize i can't let them win i need to
01:07:55
you know what i'm saying like even though because they that night they were critiquing the
01:08:00
whole thing but that didn't you see you see what i've dealt with all
01:08:05
these years man when i try to really communicate with this guy he tunes out but this is really vital
01:08:12
this is a vital thing about you about like you're getting through certain areas i don't know where you're at what
01:08:18
are you talking about you're at the lab you're not even in the main room
01:08:24
the lab is the lobby the lab is just a couple of chairs and people
01:08:30
waiting to go somewhere so anyway um okay thanks for tuning in well have you have you gone up in the
01:08:36
lab yeah have you gone up in the lab but that's why they called it the lab yeah in labs they experiment and they
01:08:43
fail oh and then that this wraps up
01:08:48
this episode of bad friends yeah because this wraps it up because it's in the title lab means you bomb
01:08:56
what the laboratory yeah so that was the whole point of it
01:09:04
right so you're bummed about doing the job that you were supposed to do
01:09:09
with that no one even even knows what happened you're right right i didn't even notice that about a million times
01:09:15
yeah okay hey you guys there was there was a mini earthquake on the south east and the islands no no
01:09:22
there was actually a little mini earthquake in the southeast portion of mars recently oh oh but do you care
01:09:33
i don't like what you're doing right now do you care no you know what pretty far away
01:09:39
don't give a [ __ ] don't throw anything at me dude all right so what i'm saying to you is is
01:09:44
that you take things personally you're right you're all your fears and all the things that happened to you is in your
01:09:50
mind chapel is he right and i just want you to grow bombing in the lab like yeah did you write chappelle look at me yeah
01:09:57
it's like yeah this is my brother why are you crying steve i had
01:10:02
devastating devastating set at the in the belly room
01:10:10
in the belly room oh was allison jones there no
01:10:17
i'm gonna go i'm gonna do it okay be a man you would be amazing i'm writing something you're a [ __ ]
01:10:23
warrior i'm writing some new [ __ ] you're right yeah there you go cowboy bebop right
01:10:28
okay so why don't you recap what we talked
01:10:35
about since the beginning because i feel like you were asleep the whole time kind of yeah go ahead i remember that
01:10:41
you have the smallest dick in the room
01:10:47
that was one two and a three yeah and then to be cool you have to know
01:10:54
a lot of different musics like what he knows yeah yeah name one pavement album
01:11:02
the red one that was good go ahead um
01:11:08
when you both were younger steve was cooler than you even though you're the oldest
01:11:23
keep going i love what you're doing and even now i think i think steve has
01:11:29
a cooler look than you did to bobby
01:11:36
[Music] i love it keep going yeah good
01:11:42
feel good you're killing it good stevie that's you dog that's your dog
01:11:49
what do you mean this is you're killing it um so um what a fun episode huh did you
01:11:54
guys have fun that was fun but so guys at the same time we're gonna say thank you for being a bad friend right
01:12:00
three two one thank you for being a bad friend
01:12:06
[Music]
01:12:12
i made a i was a fool it's a ralph yes listen to ralph macchio to ralph macchio
01:12:19
oh yeah yeah we've talked about it i'll just say real quick
01:12:25
so you know there was a movie called the karate kid popular movie mr miyagi is in it but the star of it
01:12:32
was a guy named ralph macchio and if you watch the new cobra kai he's in it
01:12:37
nicest kid so there was a time jules where i was a star and when i was a star they used to have
01:12:43
me host variety shows and i i i hosted a show called the asian excellence awards
01:12:50
hosted by bobby lee right and i go up and i do a monologue it was at the will turn quentin tarantino was there right
01:12:57
danny devito remember you you sat in canada i took danny devito's seat i sat in danny devito's seat it says
01:13:04
danny devito on the seat danny was standing my brother's sitting on the scene and i said this is my seat bro
01:13:11
yeah i was a fool he was drunk that's why he's sober oh so there was one point where i was
01:13:17
sitting there and i'm like where's my brother oh he's gone thank god so i'm sitting with ralph nacho he's sitting on the chair i think tarantino's
01:13:24
there too yeah my brother's full-blown blackout drunk so i'm talking to ralph malchio
01:13:30
and so i'm here ralph nacho's right there we're sitting on couches okay this is my brother
01:13:35
i swear to god
01:13:42
ralph macchio i had a kid
01:13:48
no i said no i said no no no he didn't no no i said no this is what i did i go i know i went karate
01:13:55
kid dude karate kid did one of my favorites something stupid but not once i kept all
01:14:03
night long you did it all night long crowded kid man
01:14:09
oh i didn't i didn't did it i said one body went like this oh you did you hit him with the [ __ ] i didn't do that
01:14:16
you hit him no i didn't do that the crazy see this is work no this is where exaggeration this is
01:14:23
really different i never did the crane jordan do it
01:14:34
[Laughter] and now it's time it's jules's time yeah
01:14:39
[Music] yes
01:14:46
[Music]

Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

  • 75
    Best performance
  • 70
    Funniest
  • 70
    Best overall
  • 65
    Most unserious (in a good way)

Episode Highlights

  • The Dark Crystal Analogy
    A friend compares another to the Dark Crystal, saying they extract energy.
    “You're the actual dark crystal where you extract people's energy.”
    @ 01m 50s
    January 31, 2022
  • Friendship Chemistry
    A discussion about the chemistry between friends and how it develops over time.
    “There was some chemistry and a light.”
    @ 03m 08s
    January 31, 2022
  • Spa Adventures
    A humorous recount of a spa experience with friends, highlighting the awkwardness.
    “You know there's a spa... I usually take a lot of comics too.”
    @ 06m 57s
    January 31, 2022
  • Brotherly Pride and Shame
    Reflecting on the highs and lows of sibling rivalry in wrestling.
    “He shamed the Lee family, he burned the family tree dude.”
    @ 28m 01s
    January 31, 2022
  • Long Drives for Family
    A heartfelt recount of a 12-hour drive to support a brother in wrestling.
    “I drove 12 hours from Sacramento in a minivan dude.”
    @ 28m 07s
    January 31, 2022
  • Music Connection
    A moment of bonding over shared music tastes and experiences.
    “I think I connect with Bobby now.”
    @ 30m 52s
    January 31, 2022
  • Movie Recommendations
    A lively discussion about favorite movies, including Black Widow and Spider-Man.
    “I swear to god it's good, it's like Spider-Man good.”
    @ 35m 31s
    January 31, 2022
  • Anger Management
    An honest admission about dealing with anger issues.
    “I have a massive anger problem.”
    @ 50m 00s
    January 31, 2022
  • The Power of Trying
    In comedy, it's not about winning or losing, but about the courage to try.
    “God doesn't care if you win or lose, he just cares if you try.”
    @ 01h 03m 34s
    January 31, 2022
  • Finding Pride in Failure
    Even after a bad performance, there's pride in having the courage to perform.
    “There's still an underlying feeling that you did it.”
    @ 01h 04m 32s
    January 31, 2022
  • Personal Connections
    Exploring the personal connections and fears that shape our experiences.
    “You take things personally.”
    @ 01h 09m 44s
    January 31, 2022

Episode Quotes

Key Moments

  • Unique Connection03:01
  • Spa Experience06:57
  • Sibling Rivalry28:01
  • Long Drive28:07
  • Music Bonding30:52
  • Movie Talk35:31
  • Pride in Performance1:04:32
  • Personal Growth1:09:44

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown

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