00:00:00
you know I saw the Oscars day it was Michael Keaton and he was in the audience he presented an award and he
00:00:07
also did a little bit which I thought was pretty funny oh that was funny yeah I liked uh Danny DeVito and Arnold and
00:00:13
then and then Danny Deo goes Batman there he is keth did the really straight
00:00:19
face hell it the whole time someone said he just should have mouthed I'm Batman I'm going to ask him about uh was that
00:00:26
movie The not the paper there there was the paper and then there was Spotlight
00:00:31
he's done so many things what a cool dude always in a good movie always laying low got a little bit of mystery
00:00:39
to him I think split after Batman pretty quickly it was funny on when they did that bit of the Oscars I was like oh all
00:00:45
these guys have been on Danny Devo was just on sweger was on Michael Keaton
00:00:51
very looking forward to it uh I see him out here and there rarely always a gentleman always Tak he lives in
00:00:58
Montana he looks like a guy that could have been Coster and Yellowstone he's a standup which I'm
00:01:05
sure we're about he punchline uh in San Francisco before he got into movies so
00:01:13
that's very interesting and he hosted SNL twice I was there the first one oh yeah very funny yeah MH oh cool so um
00:01:20
I'm sure he's kicking himself for leaving standup and becoming a monster star 'll ask him are you still kicking
00:01:28
yourself about not playing [ __ ] Uncle fucker's chuckle hutch in Mississippi yeah you could have played sir laughel
00:01:34
lot in De Mo for a long could done exor show Saturday string of
00:01:39
gutbusters in Tuscaloosa Billy's Chuckle Hut and uh Missoula Montana you know add
00:01:46
in that fifth show get the vomit off the floor and bring in the horses Funny Bone
00:01:52
in Nova Scotia there is funny bones the funniest one I actually played was the rib tick
00:02:00
the rib Tickler in Minneapolis Minnesota welcome to the rib Tickler anyway uh
00:02:05
We've run out of steam energy here's Michael Katon to pick up the
00:02:11
[Music] pace I love a hat that makes no
00:02:18
statement absolutely that's me right down in the middle not committed to anything because you don't want to go to
00:02:23
an airport and have some funny phrase and funny t-shirts so everyone has an excuse to go hey my cookie yeah yeah I'm
00:02:32
looking at Spades this is my favorite thing I was hoping there was a Joe Dirt because I love Joe Dirt there's a Joe
00:02:37
Dirt hat but on the other side oh there is yeah but there's also a bottle of
00:02:43
tongs you [ __ ] [ __ ] whoops yeah he's to be in frame everyone's fired
00:02:49
just chug it oh no those are pills right my set designer
00:02:55
fired set deck uhoh no I'm trying trying to stay young I what else can I put here
00:03:01
that sounds young there's nothing Pepto bismal everything's old why am I far
00:03:07
away I'm heavily medicated myself right now so I'm feeling I'm feeling real so great
00:03:13
I'm feeling real good I'll give Michael a compliment ready yeah okay ready might
00:03:18
we compliment we embarrass our guests with compliment only this no this might be the only compliment um I've got a few
00:03:26
but at the Oscars a great surprise bit and got a [ __ ] laugh and uh yeah
00:03:33
really out of the blue awesome can we see the face just on the zoom it was a very yeah good
00:03:42
one I would have started laughing uh because it was out of nowhere and then
00:03:48
um do they tell you how far ahead do you know about this stuff and you ever practice they just go this is going to
00:03:53
be a thing play along or don't wow very good observation no tell you what happened how did this happen you guys
00:04:00
have probably done that or or something like it then it's fairly it's kind of horrible really because it's hard to go
00:04:05
up there and you know youve got x amount of seconds to make a thing work and I wanted to do it because I love Katherine
00:04:11
she's a pal so they go over everything and wisely rehears it actually was
00:04:17
probably smart and so when I left the rehearsal uh because normally I'd go no
00:04:22
it's it's simple thing and we're going to be up and off let's not worry about it but I was smart enough this time to say I get it you know where camera is
00:04:29
blah blah blah so I went down to do it and on the way home I got a text from Kimmel or Molly or both saying his wife
00:04:38
saying uh hey would you do this one thing uh and I and I I had planned to do
00:04:44
the you know do the thing with Catherine leave and then go to one of the parties
00:04:50
or something so I thought ohow shoot okay and I thought all right and then he told me what the bit was and I thought
00:04:56
oh that could be kind of funny and I don't know who that came from frankly I know if that was something Danny threw out because I saw him there so anyway
00:05:03
they said would you do it and I said sure So then this is when show business is truly fun truly fun and I'm sitting
00:05:11
there boy this is gonna sound so obnoxious because I'm about to name drop my ass off love it yeah it did you say
00:05:19
get it out yeah Purge Pur it's funny I'm sitting there ready
00:05:27
and I'm talking literally to alucino and we're we're bullshitting and B and this guy because they said you're on the you
00:05:34
present now at this point and then about 4 minutes later or whatever you come
00:05:39
back for this segment or or or right they pull you early and go you're on in an hour and a half let's get you
00:05:44
backstage yeah yes normally right so not now it's like this kid really great kid
00:05:50
flustered out of his mind you know comes over and goes you gotta go and I go oh where and he goes I go wait for that
00:05:56
thing go I go [ __ ] I go okay let's like now he says yes now we're going to go
00:06:01
see you coming out a commercial or something so I was smart enough to say I think I brought along I didn't want to
00:06:09
just show up like you just saw me a few minutes ago so I had this thing tied as an ascot to go full br Bruce Wayne kind
00:06:14
of thing so so I actually had a wardrobe change so I said run in the back there's
00:06:21
a thing and there's confusion I thought well it won't work I don't worry about it and all a sudden shows I put it on
00:06:28
and it's so fun because walking in and they it it's Panic time you know no get
00:06:33
over where's his seat and this poor kid is sweating bullets and you know you're among all these movie stars and people
00:06:39
in there Mayhem and stuff and you you're thinking man I hope this works and you're kind of Pumped you know because
00:06:45
you go that good nervous thing like this would be funny if it works I think yeah
00:06:51
and then you know we discussed like what do we do so anyway so it was really fun because then then you know you sit
00:06:57
you're sitting there and I knew what I was going to do at that point so you light go off and I just locked in but my
00:07:02
first idea I said hey what do you think of this just fun to talk to you guys about this I said what do you think
00:07:08
about this is this anything first of all they were right they said no we think Dead's there and I went yeah probably
00:07:14
right let's do it but my first idea was I wonder like they said you might sit next to PA GTI and I said all right who
00:07:20
whomever I'm just gonna sit like this and when they're up there Danny and Arnold and they do their thing I'm just
00:07:26
going to be bullshitting to somebody I come out of pain attention I contr show just talking about [ __ ] then just kind
00:07:33
of look up just kind of blow him off like this I think the dead stair was probably
00:07:39
better you know I don't mind a combo where you're talking and they say Batman's here and you go yeah like you just turn straight into
00:07:47
him and walk in and they're like oh [ __ ] but whatever you did everyone's in on the joke at that moment so the fact
00:07:54
that you're holding it so straight like you're internally laughing yourself right it was kind of in your brain
00:08:00
you're going this is [ __ ] funny working and and the way Danny let into it they're talking talking hey he's over
00:08:06
there you know it was such a great the way he leaped on that was perfect and
00:08:12
what you did was perfect you stole the Oscars I'm just say another favorite part Michael is when you're hustling
00:08:18
down the stairs you know and they're like 30 seconds so we come back from the break and they're like which seat is he
00:08:24
and they go to some seat full and go get the [ __ ] out of here and they're like that's Planet oh
00:08:30
no the one next to you get out you can't that really funny right BR Kate out yeah
00:08:37
get her out of here we got a bit but I you know those unexpected bits are great Spielberg giving uh points at himself
00:08:44
gets a huge laugh when she said I sent my nudes to the wrong person any he points that got a good one but those are
00:08:50
kind of I guess they got to be used sparingly because it's hard to beat them like those those two understand you know
00:08:58
you know when you're there you don't really you can't kind of hear it on monitors and I didn't really see it and
00:09:03
uh but I I it felt like it was when I glan up the screen backstage I thought I feel this is pretty good and I as I
00:09:11
understand it was actually a really good show uh you know I saw bits and pieces later okay it was was whoever came up
00:09:18
with the idea that the five nominees in the audience and then the five winners
00:09:23
vet them one at a time and it was so emotional that was that they had never done that before right it was fantastic
00:09:30
yeah interesting yeah you guys would be able to do that I think I think Jimmy's great at it I mean Crystal was great man
00:09:37
I mean but that as you can imagine you guys would know better than I actually that's somewhat thankless I don't mean
00:09:43
to say that like oh [ __ ] them you know it's but it is hard it's really really
00:09:48
really hard I I would imagine you know and the pressure is really on in a ridiculous way you know right and he's
00:09:56
he's luckily had all the people on his show usually so they giving him a break Joe Koy had had a tougher came in with a
00:10:02
deficit at the Golden Globes because they weren't as familiar and they were like win us over like we're stars and
00:10:10
and and there's a little of that I think that's real uh I would like to do it sometime I don't know I think the nerves
00:10:15
would be so overwhelming and Jimmy's very cool about it he's done it four
00:10:21
times I I think that's exact thing yeah but I was there when Anthony Hopkins was
00:10:27
up for Hannibal Lector and then so Billy comes out he's wheeled out he's got the H Lector mask on like and then Billy
00:10:34
would put himself in film montages and then Billy was a song and dance man at heart you know Titanic it's
00:10:41
going down it's going down you know going yeah tiic it's going I'm sinking
00:10:49
I'm sinking and it was just baggy pants VOD villian and irresistibly
00:10:55
entertaining and someone like Jimmy is a monologist and he's great at it but that is a that is a little more
00:11:01
nerve-wracking it's a Highwire act here's a joke here's a joke here's a joke that's nerve-wracking you know BR
00:11:08
used I can't do it because I don't have the room here but I used to do that thing uh like how people on on theater
00:11:15
or in Broadway first of all a lot of Broadway Tunes if you throw the word hey
00:11:20
into the front of it it kind of hey
00:11:28
people any anything's funnier hey I'm all right you're all
00:11:34
right tonight tonight you know or even more vague hey Christmas you're coming
00:11:40
around oh are you talking to Christmas and then 10 people dress as Christmas tree where a tree you're a tree I love
00:11:47
Broadway what can I tell you and that's the attitude you both clicked into the attitude it's like look out world you
00:11:53
know yeah yeah I mean as a kid I was always thrown out by Musical I wasn't
00:11:59
cuz they'd be talking in a movie and then all of a sudden they'd be going pass the butter pass the butter today we
00:12:07
need butter and I'm seven years old going what you can do this people just break out into songs right I remember
00:12:13
seeing I loved Western as a kid okay favorite one we're fairly in the same uh
00:12:20
uh uh lonely other Brave probably KK adult or as a kid I've never seen the
00:12:27
Sons Of Katie Elder as a kid that was like cool I saw it in the theater when I was like seven or something the Sons Of
00:12:35
Katie Elder I would watch there certain coule I just didn't relate to because they were too clean and neat and cute
00:12:41
looking and and I remember watching one and it was interesting because it was the west but maybe in the 40s or
00:12:48
something which now I love uh and a car pulled up and I went wait wait whoa hold
00:12:54
on a minute what's a car doing here an 18 40 yeah I bet you guys were like me
00:13:02
when you watch movies or television shows there were probably my guess is you're similar there were probably
00:13:08
things that your little head kind of either couldn't wrap itself around or really got excited about that the
00:13:14
average kid probably didn't you know what I mean like there were certain shows when in grade school my friends
00:13:20
would do uh uh that do uh what was that Colonel clink or something that do clink
00:13:27
Hogan Hogan's Heroes uh Schultz I I see nothing I see nothing
00:13:34
yep I remember that one shows that I never might all the kids used to love that I never thought were funny and and
00:13:41
I always thought well I'm the weird one then because but then the ones I me and a couple of your buddies really thought
00:13:46
were funny it was like a small group I'm sure you felt that way that you had like one or two guys oh totally and I had
00:13:53
three older brothers the whole house and my younger sister was just mad for movies in those days my sister loves
00:14:00
Splendor in the grass so much and you couldn't VCR it so we'd wait a year and then the whole house belonged to Lori
00:14:06
with the Splendor in the grass with Warren batty and she just as pretty she just did prity that's a reference R but
00:14:13
I'm thinking the one for me that seemed the coolest I was probably in junior
00:14:18
high was get smart me too that was like you hit it right in the head that was my favorite you know what I think it was and and then there was a thing called Uh
00:14:26
Oh shoot what was that show that I thought was really irreverent I think it's the irreverent thing that we liked
00:14:32
you know the the making fun of or something you know uh but getsmart was 100% right right there yeah well what
00:14:39
about Hogan's Heroes being like I didn't even understand the theme I didn't understand how heavy the theme was and I
00:14:45
just thought it was just goofy guys but when you look at you go wait what was it about I didn't know till five years ago
00:14:50
I didn't know I was like wait what was it I know I know uh yeah you know U
00:14:58
here's a weird one I never as a kid when my friends loved the three stoes I went
00:15:04
well I would never I didn't believe it i' go well that people here's how weird I was I go I'm not in I'm not so not in
00:15:11
on that it's silly it's not like I don't get it you know I guess I know where you're going with this yes and as I got
00:15:19
older it [ __ ] kills me now I look at it I go I go look at these men like
00:15:25
there's always that scene scene where and there's a woman who played the Ro all the time of kind of matly and they
00:15:32
would say the scene would be them saying well this is hallway or something you know and she say now you three boys
00:15:39
behave yourselves while you house sit for my home watch watch after my daughters or
00:15:46
something like that yeah just to look at these guys and she played now listen fellas you behave yourselves you know
00:15:53
these are the three idiots they higher off a Craigslist these three guys they can't do anything yeah commit
00:15:59
manslaughter toward each you know they get a crowbar you know now go over there and shave the ice you know and then he
00:16:05
has shaving cream on the ice and he's shaving the ice that's right giv orders
00:16:11
sh some amazing sh the I now work on those rocket ships you two you know they
00:16:17
always come back the boss comes in five minutes later how's things coming along well what have you done
00:16:23
here you but you're right I love them more now they're more acid humor now I
00:16:29
was AB Costello then not so much the the three stes now three stoes so aent guard
00:16:36
I am so with [Music]
00:16:42
you but I always did I did like ad kind of and I kind of likeed uh uh um yeah
00:16:50
they made they I kind of got that I don't know what meets Frankenstein meets
00:16:55
Frankenstein because in the in the day the the monsters were the monsters of the day you know Bella legosi and and so
00:17:02
that was sort of yeah depending how old you were a little bit scary but how
00:17:08
funny because they in their script they just go A and B adlibs I mean the scripts would come out I know Bobby
00:17:14
Slayton this comedian famous comedian owns one of the original scripts of AD Costello meets Frankenstein and it's
00:17:20
just a and b ad Li so you could tell when he comes in what do you scared of what' you see when he sees he sees someone come
00:17:28
out of the coffin and then the straight man comes in it's such great it pops you know yeah wow yeah I would love to own
00:17:34
one of those that'd be very cool to have one of those uh also I was never afraid of scary things things that scared kids
00:17:41
Never Never Scared me and I didn't I I know I know there's no Godzilla you know
00:17:47
I know I just know there isn't I'm so I'm such a drag when I think you know but when I my friend here's a great one
00:17:54
you know I was RA Catholic and I was an alra boy and we were very Catholic and everything
00:17:59
and when The Exorcist came out I have a friend I I'm going to see him
00:18:04
uh and visit him because an old pal and he's a real wise guy you know like say
00:18:10
you know he' make a comment uh he's a poet actually writes Beautiful poetry but he' like make fun of [ __ ] you know
00:18:16
and be a wise ass all the time he told me so he he didn't he didn't respect anything really he was really you know
00:18:23
uh irreverent he went to see the ex went to see The Exorcist it gets to the point
00:18:28
where I don't know at some point he gets up and leaves and goes right next door to a bar and like starts drinking
00:18:33
whiskey he was so frightened just scared the [ __ ] out of there's not a chance
00:18:39
scare the [ __ ] out of me because I didn't even my friends High School buddies oh let's go in it's called the
00:18:44
oxer assist or eist whatever we come in late we're in the third row we don't even know what it is and it scared the
00:18:51
[ __ ] out of oh my God and then I went home my parents were in Montana no one was around I'm staying in this track
00:18:58
home I go in the door and we have this little dog and it's at the top of the stairs and Pitch it's pitch black and
00:19:03
it's going I mean the dog's a devil yeah my
00:19:09
brother saw yeah the dog was a devil my brother saw it and I was [ __ ] bricks just hearing it in secondhand and I
00:19:15
would I've still never seen it it was too scary with you yeah people wish they
00:19:21
hadn't people go I wish it's not my head there's some things you just don't want rattling around in there and and when
00:19:26
they go it's based on a real story then I'm out I don't though this can happen nope nope nope nope NOP okay let let's
00:19:32
move to like coolest guy no wait I have a question about the Oscar day I one last Oscar that's right let's we got to
00:19:38
get back to the guy who stole the show yeah okay ready listen to this Michael what I what I my advice to you so you're
00:19:45
at the Oscars so what you probably do is you're there next to like you know Margot Robbie or something and then when
00:19:51
they hand the Oscar to someone you just casually go oof those are heavy and then that denotes that you have won a you
00:19:57
know it's just the thing I would do yeah that's really smart yeah like just a
00:20:02
really low thing like yeah yeah heavier than you think you got to use your traps a little bit and some lats and then uh
00:20:11
also was there was there any one there wait I want I want to ask a question
00:20:17
goad was there anyone backstage you saw this guy and you just for some reason it popped in your head I like to [ __ ]
00:20:24
smash that guy in the face just a random thought you wouldn't
00:20:30
act on it but like that guy has a punchable face no uh yeah several no nobody yeah
00:20:38
nobody by the way I love goad I just want to compliment loving her so much as
00:20:45
a performer and a person and I ran into her at this JJ Abrams event I barely get out of the house but I was there and
00:20:51
we're just kidding around I said who makes a move in their 60s I mean really this a few years back who makes a move
00:20:57
in their 60s nobody makes a move in their 60s in Show Business and she says Marty and then Marty does the thing with
00:21:04
Steve Martin but that she was the one making the move with with the half hour show was it called uh shit's creek oh
00:21:12
yeah she went well I love forever and she's kind of a pal you know uh not kind
00:21:18
of a pal she's a friend of mine so well she if you meet her for three minutes you want to be a best friend exactly and
00:21:24
she's nicest girl best girl you know we V we have a big family too and we had you know we we're have similar you my
00:21:30
mom Irish not not from Ireland but so we had big you know that that whole thing
00:21:35
in our background uh but her family I remember meeting them years ago and she's and she's just so great I they did
00:21:41
this little movie and I asked if she' play my wife in this little movie uh uh
00:21:47
Griffin Dunn and and Amy Robinson his producing partner had this little deal for a while where they were doing really
00:21:53
small independent movies and there was a Don Dilo book called game six and uh I
00:21:59
did it with them uh you know shot it for I mean nothing I think honestly I'm not I'm not kidding I think it might have
00:22:04
been like 600 Grand or something like that and uh so besides Beetlejuice she was my I got her to play my wife in this
00:22:12
in this mood she's she's great and that's one reason I wanted to present when it was with her you know perfect oh
00:22:18
everyone knew I mean that are Beetle Juice fans like there they are we all know the movies coming out in September
00:22:24
so that's one thing about you like I know you you did the flash you got into the Batman outfit 30 years later and it
00:22:32
I guess it fit so I'd like to know why and how do you manage your weight are you on OIC I mean what is like you could
00:22:40
play you're the same siiz person you pretty fit so you played Batman 30 years
00:22:45
apart yeah I did I was kind of half brag I mean I was kind of bragging about it really but I was making a joke out of it
00:22:51
like but I was pretty proud of myself because I thought there's no way this is going to work fit right back in uh and
00:22:59
and I was I thought wow I'm a dude you know look at me but you know what I learned like a dope on the first one I
00:23:04
thought I better get fit for this thing because we didn't know if the the whole idea of the suit that was l i mean that
00:23:10
really was the day before my shot in that suit it hadn't been ready they hadn't it wasn't ready yet so I didn't
00:23:17
know how the I saw images never knew what but how is this actually physically going to work right can I thought you
00:23:25
know I'm being real actory and everything and I thought I better be fit for this thing thinking well you know what what's the point I was working on a
00:23:31
bag and Nicholson walks by me and he goes what are you doing and I go you
00:23:38
know sweating being real groovy going working out something like that goes what are you doing that for and he just
00:23:44
walk out the door there's no reason to work out
00:23:50
because you're not going tits up the suit stays on that was later with
00:23:56
Christian Bale got was shirt listen did 50 push-ups that there's no scene that I can recall like that where I'm shirtless
00:24:02
or something but also what I learned how stupid I was it's actually easier to
00:24:08
there's more room to move inside if you're smaller yeah so what's the point you know uh I told the story but you
00:24:15
guys will think find this funny we didn't know if the thing would work you know and and then it was a whole thing
00:24:21
gez how do you light it and how do you even move in it blah blah I'm not going to bore you without yeah you know all
00:24:27
that but but there was like one of the first shots you were're still putting this thing together and go okay wait can
00:24:32
you even move and yeah and I can move and but I can't sit or whatever there's a shot where I'm like trying to act real
00:24:39
cool you know and I turn like this what I the reason this whole thing this whole motion started with I'm supposed to turn
00:24:46
something happens some bad guy comes down or something I don't remember it is long shot I turned to look at him lights real cool and is I turn this this I turn
00:24:55
this way and this thing part of the suit goes [Music]
00:25:00
like and the sup like opened up oh so it's off your face we hadn't figured out how to make
00:25:07
it you know how to get that whole thing yet they we're all constantly pasting and sticking it so that's where all that
00:25:13
stuff came from I thought well [ __ ] you know it's really easier to go like this and the thing won't pop like
00:25:19
that so tight yeah a specific mouth that you would do right I mean when the first
00:25:25
Batman came out just sort of the way you made your mouth when you're in the suit way more
00:25:31
credit than I deserve I just got put her on this is what I would go
00:25:38
with and it scare them a little bit they' be like is what is that Captain curious I'm
00:25:43
like you can't see it on zoom and it's so good um Captain
00:25:49
Curious uh what made you guys say instead of doing like either of you
00:25:55
could just do your own but you said no we should probably double up here and do this which for me is a good idea but I
00:26:01
um I don't know anything about this yeah uh I would say known Dana
00:26:08
since right before SNL was a big fan of his and um got on SNL where I was pretty
00:26:14
much his understudy and then uh and he can't really compete with danne out there but danne did a great job left I
00:26:21
left I would see him here and there and then I started seeing him more because he lived close by the last couple years
00:26:27
and we talked a lot about stuff and we'd always talk about SNL and just whatever and I I kind of wanted to do one of
00:26:33
these and then I thought I wanted to team up with someone that's funny that can share and then also he has his own
00:26:38
people that love him and just sort of a wider net and then it's more fun and it's easier to talking Dana is a smart
00:26:46
dude a good idea it's so smart that's interesting you were not what do you mean in an understudy well
00:26:52
Dana was doing so well but he might not have been there forever you know you have your shelf life and then Lauren I
00:26:58
sort of looked like him and just coincidentally was a little like him and then but I wasn't like a big
00:27:03
impressionist and then um Lauren I think to Dana was playing a little like we got
00:27:09
this guy right here oh Lauren would say because David would sit behind me and read through you know and I look over
00:27:15
and Lauren David's always on Deck he'll always be ready if um anything happens
00:27:22
if maybe not going to do it if that catchphrase starts to fade away we own
00:27:28
it um David will be right there and by the way he has tried on the church lady
00:27:34
dress and it fits fits like a [ __ ] glove Michael Keaton Michael Keaton is
00:27:41
here just you as a host the Monday meeting oh Michael
00:27:47
Keaton is here he's our favorite freaky dude but also we have the same Manager David and I about getting put
00:27:54
together and then podcast became all the thing first they were just sort of fun I don't have a manager and then there was
00:27:59
like you you don't have a manager you've been paying him for 22 years
00:28:07
[Music] Mike now we should talk about uh a little project at some point your your
00:28:14
nox goes away yeah this I I directed this movie it's good but mostly what's
00:28:20
good about it is uh the cast is pretty damn good that's was Pacino and James
00:28:26
Harden marry I mean uh Mar G Harden uh
00:28:31
it's just really Susie nakamuro you know I wanted somebody funny in there she's James Maron James Maron James marson's
00:28:39
from jury I just saw him jury duty right is that yeah so yeah we should talk about that show the show so this movie
00:28:45
so uh like that you know I directed before and this was something I wanted
00:28:51
to do but it was not not like I must tell the story I've been think dreaming of the story for years it was a script
00:28:56
that came it was really well written kind of sat around the house for a while you know was offered it as an actor and
00:29:03
then went off and did something came back picked it up did something else came back and I didn't think anyone was
00:29:09
really interested before then anymore and they would call me and say hey what do you think of this the writer would
00:29:15
like to know finally and I don't blame the guy and I said yeah let me read it one more time I think this is pretty good and I said you know what the only
00:29:21
way I want to do this is if I can direct it to so we started doing it you know you know how it works there was like 24
00:29:28
four or five days to shoot it um I got this really good cast together and uh
00:29:33
it's pretty good oh it's cool I saw the trailer it's very cool it's very interesting I did
00:29:39
not know you directed it can you hear that I did not know you directed it and now I uh it's even more props to you
00:29:47
because right away it's it's a very interesting story um could you tell a
00:29:52
little bit about it just so people know I'm really I'm not good at this uh yeah
00:29:58
here's the setup Contract Killer I'll tell you where you're right and wrong thank you we'll F we'll fill in the
00:30:04
blanks I could say it really fast I think it it's I think it has an incredible Hook if you could call it a hook but and
00:30:12
if you guys could travel with me while I sell this thing and just pitch in uh
00:30:18
this guy is a contract killer uh Hitman if you want but it's not really Hitman movie at all actually so he's got this
00:30:25
form of uh uh called critel yakob uh
00:30:31
which is also a good name for a comedy team now that I hear my or a forward in the
00:30:36
NBA that's right another Eastern from Lithuania Christ another Eastern
00:30:42
European and it's an actual disease and it it it it uh it it goes fast once
00:30:48
you're diagnosed there's not much time and uh James marrison plays my kid and
00:30:54
out of the blue uh I get this news that I've got it so he had the ticking clock
00:31:00
thing and out of nowhere it's great shot by the way I'm very proud of it uh I
00:31:05
hear something at the door I I start slowly walk out the door really beautiful shot comes down and the door
00:31:13
swings open you see marsman there who is unbelievably good in this movie like his
00:31:20
hands WRA Sweating Bullets emotional kind of crying and I go who the [ __ ] is
00:31:25
this guy and turns out he's my son and so he comes back to he's in he's in
00:31:31
big trouble and so we it's this thing of me trying to uh pull this deal off I'm
00:31:37
trying I'm speaking in a way where I I don't CH too much of it trying to pull this deal off uh uh with my with this
00:31:44
with marson's character in before I'm totally gone so I progressively get
00:31:50
worse as I try to basically get him out of a jam to put it mildly um and maren I
00:31:58
was saying I keep saying this and I need to stop saying it uh I go wait don't people see James Marsden in this they're
00:32:05
going to they're going to be knocked out truth is I don't think actors will be I think I think people will go yeah I knew
00:32:11
the guy could do it I've seen a lot of his stuff you know and it's harder for some of those those handsome boys you
00:32:16
know to break through that thing and well oh I know uh dead to me he was so
00:32:22
brilliant and dead to me you know um amazing and I think that what I love
00:32:28
about this and it must be must have an interesting challenge for you is you take a guy who's a a Hitman he's a
00:32:33
badass he's got his wits it's kind of that's the way I see it and then slowly
00:32:39
but surely it's like Superman having a little bit of Kryptonite in his spandex
00:32:44
slowly but surely he's losing his superpower and so and there's a Race Against Time is that kind of the engine
00:32:50
of it and you had to play this little demented little more demented little more demented shot everything out of
00:32:56
order especially only have 24 days no luxury say well we need to shoot an order so I was always checking and
00:33:02
here's what I wouldn't do again I actually like directing myself I've done it twice now and and three times when I
00:33:09
did the Letterman thing the Letterman film festival that you guys I'm sure have seen but they the uh you save a lot
00:33:15
of time but the pro what I wouldn't I wouldn't do this again I wouldn't play the lead this hard this complex where
00:33:23
you go wait where am I now what am I doing now when how bad off am I you know it's like when I did multiplicity that
00:33:30
was well that's a show in itself we should do because making that was insane and so much fun but well you'll
00:33:37
appreciate this sorry to go off I really should be S this movie better five five characters
00:33:43
five 10 and I didn't want to do the fat suit thing or the change the makeup
00:33:48
thing like wow you know now he's got a big nose I wanted to do well if he's just off a little you know except for
00:33:54
the one guy who goes totally off and I totally stole from Jerry Lewis that but if you if you go off a little you just
00:34:02
off a little bit but how we would do it you're the perfectly two people to talk to about this there would be a pingpong
00:34:08
ball on a night on a a stand a light stand or something you're and you're off then it's we added a couple of these
00:34:14
young actors were great if I needed something to bounce off but while I was doing it you know if I was like let's
00:34:21
say I was playing three who was the real sensitive guy I I I i' think of an idea knowing I'm going
00:34:28
to be around the other side talking to one of my other guys and I go oh so I'd have to set myself up ahead of time so
00:34:35
the react on the other side yeah yeah yeah think and then you go wait we might
00:34:41
not shoot that for a week you know what I mean so I'm going Whoa man I gotta
00:34:47
remember that thing you know how do I do that or I'd make a note or something do you guys did you guys work are you a
00:34:53
writer Downer like Chris Rock is so unbelievably organized his work ethic is
00:34:58
so good I think from what I know of him but I was listening to Bill Bird's talk
00:35:03
the other day says no I don't do that at all I just kind of I see something I don't really go over it my head I don't
00:35:09
want to write it I know it I get up on stage and I just start doing no not me yeah I write down a lot and I I have to
00:35:16
remember inflections and now I'm gotten to the point where I audio record it because of inflections and a different
00:35:22
way to deliver it so I can remember and Dana um for me personally I think that
00:35:31
the style I like to do was really best in small clubs and the club that made me
00:35:37
was San Francisco uh in the hate ashbery the other Cafe CU you're playing Honky
00:35:43
Tonk bars and the blenders going show us your dick you know that kind of stuff
00:35:48
um but for me a small room where I'm coming on to this stuff is the most
00:35:54
exhilarating I get R the redundancy standup word for word gets really hard
00:36:01
for me so I try to deconstruct it I try to make myself laugh I try to surprise myself but if it is like two or three
00:36:07
thousand people I lose a lot so if I did another standup special I'd want to do
00:36:13
it in a really small room 30 seats 40 seats that'd be the best you know truly
00:36:19
wow I remember when you were headlining the punchline they said this guy uh marle
00:36:25
clotton they never got your name Marco clotton is playing playing the punchline Marco claen what who's he you but uh you
00:36:34
were a really great standup I mean you were a headliner and well not as good as you guys because that people don't know
00:36:39
how hard it is to get to where you guys are to get that good how much work there
00:36:44
is and how how difficult is no one really appreciates I was on a movie once a long long long long time ago and this
00:36:50
guy goes to we're talking about standup and he he's an actor not a
00:36:55
famous actor just some guy playing and he talking and I I never forget since he said he said it like this he said huh he
00:37:02
said yeah I never did stand up I didn't say anything but I thought dude you have no [ __ ] idea how hard it is to to get
00:37:09
to the level you don't what me like yeah I probably could have done it if I wanted you know they don't understand because
00:37:15
they're funny at the Christmas party and and then they don't know they be funny on demand when you have a migraine and
00:37:21
you just bit your tongue and you're so bored and you're tired and then you got to go out and dismantle the room
00:37:28
that takes a long time and you remember when there were like 11 standups you know now there's
00:37:35
there's 11 in my house somewhere well you influencers go out
00:37:43
you know young women or men and they do the two minutes they they take and they put it on YouTube and then they try to
00:37:50
put them at the Chuckle Hut and fres no you know and they're going to do an hour and it's no it doesn't work like people
00:37:56
now in common don't you think in really good standups like really really a lot you would think that couldn't happen you
00:38:02
know just the numbers wouldn't work you know but but there are really are people are getting good at it yeah Michael is
00:38:08
this a I think I've asked you this um just out in the world but did was one of
00:38:13
your jokes what if it's bad and I say it's you but I like it where you say I landed
00:38:20
in Minnesota and it was three degrees I was like why be any actually land somewhere today was one degree one I
00:38:27
said why have any I say that so much I try to
00:38:35
attribute it to you sometimes it slips my mind but overall wom I had a joke like that or it wasn't near as good but
00:38:42
how did people reminisce in the year two God remember remember early
00:38:47
one right let's go back to those days yeah I us kind of joke I was shitty at
00:38:53
jokes though you guys I can't I never never really told jokes for well you were a rhythm actor guy you know you did
00:39:00
that you did the gangster guy which love it said it was you later on but whatever but I know that you did that kind of
00:39:06
yeah that's the guy that's the ticket right you did you did characters attitudes 30s line I remember writing go
00:39:12
30 in old movies got guys Li poor guy everybody was beating up over that I
00:39:18
thought please let this man off the hook the thing he does is probably his own thing I have no idea anyway I should be
00:39:23
probably selling my movie more I'm sorry I'm bad at this but uh it's really good hope everybody goes i' I'd love talking
00:39:29
to you guys about this stuff well by the way selling it I think you've you've sold this hook because when I saw the
00:39:36
trailer I don't want to know anything else I'm just like I'm already in like I don't want to know all the tricks because you'll start to figure it out
00:39:43
maybe but also I ran into Mila Kunis two nights ago are you doing something with
00:39:48
Mila it's actually a comedy it's not hard hard comedy she's a really nice girl woman uh and and uhh Hing Meers who
00:39:57
Nancy Myers's daughter uh wrote oh okay yeah and and it's it's this really nice
00:40:02
little movie it's softish you know uh very kind of emotional but sweet and uh
00:40:08
uh it's really good this woman hie so interesting she's really smart uh and
00:40:15
and she so loves comedy and she's so she's very old school she loves old
00:40:21
classic movies and she's young I mean she's in her 30s I think uh um and
00:40:26
here's what really funny I was at I was at I was actually talking with Marty
00:40:31
Short I was at her mom's party once I don't go to a lot of parties but I was at her mom's party once right up the
00:40:38
road here one time and and this she said come here I want you to meet my daughter and she was like a teenager and so she
00:40:45
you know this kid was like 14 15 years old at the time and she was a massive fan like she knew everything I did and
00:40:52
she was shy and everything and she said no she said she said this girl's like your number one fan she's like a little
00:40:59
kid um and then she ended up directing which is kind of cool and then you get to be in something with yeah and Nancy
00:41:06
who was one of the best ever uh of that genre did she do was the dying Keat
00:41:11
movie with Sam Shepard she goes out in the country sorry do we have a winner but I think it was in Nancy Meyers she
00:41:18
makes pretty movies that were just so irresistible no so many a Mama baby
00:41:25
something I can't my wife's not here anyway here's a question I have for you might be a non sequer how much if they
00:41:33
could do a movie with AI where they would make a virtual you but you didn't
00:41:39
have to be in it how much would they have to pay you for you to give them permission whole lot and you know what
00:41:45
lot a guy I know who was way ahead of this years ago in fact another friend of mine I'm G see him here in a couple days
00:41:51
hip me to this so long ago said here's what's going to happen he totally called
00:41:57
it and this was like I'm tell I'm telling you he said this to me 20 I'll bet you 20 years or or
00:42:05
more wow so scale plus
00:42:10
[Music] 10 I had another thing for Michael I know we're we're grading his nerves but
00:42:16
it's almost over when I just I just rewatched actually just asked Adam about
00:42:22
the uh The Farley bit where you beat the [ __ ] out of them grandma and a boy
00:42:29
whatever you and Chris and Adam and the dress rehearsal is on YouTube which is
00:42:34
next level but also the way you beat the [ __ ] out of Farley and the way Farley
00:42:40
would throw his body around that sketch watch it this morning it is irresistibly
00:42:45
funny and talk about three stooges you are just you're grabbing his nose at one point was that your idea yeah that's one
00:42:51
of my favorite things I ever did you know I've never been good on that show particularly there are a couple shots here and there but I was never really
00:42:58
very good on it really I don't think but but but that was so so fun and that that
00:43:04
group of you guys was really fun nice nice welcoming group of guys but I would
00:43:09
tell you this not get that spayed well first of all you guys
00:43:14
make me so [ __ ] happy when I watch you you make me laugh so hard I thought how great is it that I get to hang out
00:43:21
talk to these guys because I don't see you in life that often I run to a spade down that and all you guys have done I
00:43:26
mean honestly Dana you make me laugh so [ __ ] hard uh it's crazy and Spade you
00:43:33
you you did something one time uh you know everybody goes through some
00:43:39
up and down stuff right and I was in a not a great spot right one
00:43:44
two you know up had a happy guy there for a minute and uh my wonderful older
00:43:50
sister passed away came out she was hanging out with me because she was feeling bad for me she said let's go to the movies she talked me to go movies I
00:43:56
said I don't know I I wasn't moping you know I'm not a moper I was like yeah you know it's kind of like keeping it all
00:44:02
into my unhealthy self and I said all right all right let's go see [ __ ] Tommy
00:44:09
Boy man it's hard to get funer that
00:44:15
right yeah oh yeah I mean I think it's I think in its own world it's a perfect
00:44:20
movie and I thought man how lucky am I so that that that I picked me up for
00:44:26
about hour after that I was pretty much backed down well when you when you have a 40-year career I don't know when your
00:44:33
first movie like 81 82 Ron Howard by the way what's the deal with that guy I mean
00:44:38
come on such an [ __ ] the dolly llama decided to be a director that's way I describe Ron Howard's Vibe but when you
00:44:46
have a 45y year career you have to have some dips even Jimmy Stewart and Henry Fonda did sitcoms in the in the early
00:44:53
70s I just was in a bad I wasn't career-wise I don't really think a bad mental Place yeah yeah yeah I don't
00:45:00
think of I know I was never like a career guy you know except that I I was a I'm a shitty card player and I'm a uh
00:45:08
I mean horrible like I don't even know how to play I don't know how to gamble really I can play Blackjack because that's not too hard to understand but
00:45:14
I'm horrible but with me like taking risks and stuff never even thought about it don't think about it go yeah I'll
00:45:20
take a shot back yeah I which is stupid basically you know but I always gambled
00:45:25
on myself so I never at like oh boy this is not I mean I'm not nuts I look at
00:45:30
something and hope it really does well or sometimes you do it because you I could financially really do well here if
00:45:36
this does well or I haven't but mostly it was about wow I never did that or I wonder if I could do that or that's
00:45:43
pretty interesting uh you know I really miss doing a comedy that I miss a lot but it's just hard to find one that's
00:45:49
that's really funny you know I think that people from afar uh feel that about
00:45:55
you like you're not you're not like a celebrity you know and that's different than than being a great funny dramatic
00:46:02
actor with a career there's no sense you know and I'm looking at your Wikipedia
00:46:08
page go oh that movie oh that movie yeah oh and you did that and then you've got dopesick and you're doing get to Emmy
00:46:15
for that and it's been remarkably consistent now that you see it and varied but but I want to ask you this
00:46:21
one question there is in my mind what I call a sleeper movie it's not necessarily A
00:46:29
Blockbuster a sleeper movie is when your friends are coming over relatives you goes put on a movie have you ever seen
00:46:35
this movie and you know they're going to like it and you have a sleeper movie
00:46:41
every time I've said to some oh we're look for something to watch tonight you know and it's an easy movie to watch I
00:46:46
go watch the founder you knew it he knew going to say
00:46:51
every time they go oh my God the founder and even recently in the last few months
00:46:57
thank you it's just it's so good you get to learn all about McDonald's it's a
00:47:02
true story I'm going to watch and you you are I I assume you would feel it
00:47:08
like just so in the pocket you're you're like the guy and that they the fact they got you to play Ray Croc it's the kind
00:47:15
of thing you go nah no one else could have played it as good as Keaton in that
00:47:21
particular part and and I I say the same thing to Owen Wilson his sleeper movie
00:47:26
was maybe it's a little more high-profile is Midnight in Paris especially with women I mean just what
00:47:33
if you have not seen midnight Paris watch that movie but the founder is yours yeah I really like that movie
00:47:39
proud of it you know that was Hardy Weinstein totally burying it because he was caught up and this before the he was
00:47:45
exposed and all that but he he kind of downplayed it and uh and people were
00:47:50
screaming at him angry you know some of the executives he wasn't pushing it enough and uh I remember everybody
00:47:56
getting getting excited about I said let me tell you he you can say it to his face because Billy Bob Thorton did this
00:48:02
Billy Bob Thorton once directly said to him called him every name right to his
00:48:08
face you pig you liar you thing thing you're this this and I said you can say anything you want to this guy trust me
00:48:14
when I tell you there's no he he'll just look at you and go hey want to grab some lunch he could not care less he could
00:48:22
not care less I swear to you so I said you're we're it's the he ain't going to
00:48:28
do anything if he doesn't want to do it I I never cared for personally but uh but I said don't get excited about it
00:48:34
he's you know this is it whatever whatever happened to That Guy Harvey Weinstein what whatever happened he's got a little he got a deli I think you
00:48:42
know Michael I would never compare careers but I've done movies and the and
00:48:47
and the the the sort of Dana put it in a nice way because it's a great movie but
00:48:53
when people say ones about me they go you know the one I act actually liked and then I go that you can stop
00:49:00
there I don't want to know no I don't want like some guy came up one guy once said to me hey I hey really enthusiastic
00:49:06
we hey I really like some of your movies that's pretty good what are they
00:49:13
what I'll take that actually you shouldn't take that I'll take it um yeah and I appreciate you saying that about
00:49:18
Tommy Boy because like like like you and that sketch that you did and you on the
00:49:23
show I think you did one called Dy eyes too maybe but when you're when you get that close to the Farley and in the
00:49:30
pocket like that it's just so [ __ ] fun it was just a gift and you got to do
00:49:36
it too it's so fun and you really I I don't want to repeat myself but you just
00:49:41
beat the hell out you know it made it even funnier and Farley loves that hit Me Harder Michael oh yeah right there's
00:49:48
no harder harder yeah yeah which you know could be examined I shrink some
00:49:55
that that was like a St just sketch in the sense you're coming out what's going on what the hell's going on here you
00:50:01
know and then you just beat the [ __ ] out of fary go back in the then you come in the in the g strings are off with the
00:50:08
leopard g string what the hell's going on here it's called Bobby watch's
00:50:13
grandma on YouTube yeah Michael thank you um you're a stud and I'm look for uh
00:50:19
both movies uh um and Beatle just course in September yeah get a get a meal after all right fellas thank you very much we
00:50:25
enjoyed it take care M this has been a presentation of Odyssey please follow
00:50:32
subscribe leave a like or review all the stuff smash that button whatever it is wherever you get your podcast fly on the
00:50:39
wall is executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade Jenna Weiss Burman of Odyssey Charlie finan of Brill
00:50:44
Ste entertainment and Heather Santoro the show's lead producer is Greg
00:50:53
Holtzman
