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not really ever spoke about it in depth like this. Nothing prepares you in life for those
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kind of situations, but I felt like I'd failed at the time. That's the truth. And it's still
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something that I'm unpacking still to be honest. Louie, you spoke to your sister Lotty
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about this. Would you like to see it? Louis Tomlinson. I didn't spend my life as a young lad
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thinking I was going to be a singer. Like, I grew up in a working-class town. Seven of us living in a three bed house.
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Like my mom used to work a lot of nights. She had to play dad as well. So I would have to get my sisters ready for
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school. So people in Doncaster didn't get those opportunities. And then the X Factor came along. I auditioned three
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times. First time I failed. The second time I failed. And I remember thinking, "This is utterly crushing. Just so me."
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But she made me feel like I could do anything. So instead of running away, it was like I know I deserve it. I know I
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can't. So how do I relearn confidence and go for a third time? When I think about what happened in the preceding
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five or six years, it is crazy. Yeah. And the toughest thing to deal with is just the lack of normality and
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part of growing up in a working-class town. I have this like guilt for the success and money that I've earned. And
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then personal work within the band I really really struggled with. But you co-wrote 15 platinum singles.
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But I wanted to do more. But mostly for me, I didn't realize the value of family
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time. And the more time I spent in the band, the more time I spent away from home, like two of my sisters who are
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identical twins. I've never told them this, but I wasn't confident enough to tell them apart. That shows just how
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little I was at home. And then it ends. And what was really strange was being 24
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years old, realizing that the only way is down from it. Louis, there's so many things that
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happened in your life. How does a young man grieve? It's not really something I speak loads about, but I'm I'm happy to
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because I cannot have that define me.