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Why you will never find the ‘perfect’ partner… 😳

July 23, 2026 / 01:26

This episode discusses personal relationships, ambition, and self-awareness. Arthur Brooks is referenced for his visual example comparing life choices.

The conversation emphasizes the importance of understanding what you truly want in life and relationships. It suggests that perfection is unattainable, and instead, individuals should consider what traits they are willing to compromise on in a partner.

Listeners are encouraged to reflect on their priorities, such as support for career ambitions versus personal happiness. The host shares a quote from their first boss about the significance of knowing what you want as a crucial step toward achieving it.

Overall, the episode promotes self-reflection and the idea that fulfillment comes from meaningful connections rather than superficial achievements.

TLDR

Understand your priorities in relationships to find true fulfillment.

Episode

1:26
00:00:00
You will not find the perfect person because you're not perfect. A lot of people will be listening now and they're
00:00:05
thinking, you know what, my partner isn't all that supportive and think their partner is actually against
00:00:09
[music] their ambition. What do you say to those people? Figure out what you want. We have to make trades. Arthur
00:00:15
Brooks has this just this amazing visual example that I love, which is imagine two scenarios. One of them is that you
00:00:20
drive your brand new Ferrari to a three-star Michelin restaurant and you have the corner corner booth eating the
00:00:27
best food in the world looking out of view alone. or piling into your beat up, you know,
00:00:32
Camry, going to a Denny's with your five best friends. Which one is the one you think you're going to enjoy more? It's
00:00:40
obvious. It's obvious [music] it's the second one, but we live our life like the first. It comes down to what you
00:00:46
want. You will not find the perfect person cuz you're not perfect. And so, it's just [music] what on the stats of
00:00:52
this person am I willing to make trades on? Am I willing to have somebody who's maybe not the most supportive of my
00:00:58
career, but maybe they're supportive of my subjective well-being? Maybe they're supportive of my of my extracurriculars,
00:01:03
maybe they're supportive of my spiritual journey. They might just be supportive in different ways. And so again, it's
00:01:07
what do you want? My first boss said this thing to me and it's really stuck with me. She said, "Figuring out what
00:01:13
you want is 99% [music] of the work. The easy part is getting it." And I thought
00:01:17
about that a lot because I was like, "No, the hard part is getting it." And it was it's like, "No, [music] how many
00:01:20
layers deep did you figure out what you really want?" When you really know what you want, then you just align the world
00:01:24
to go get

Episode Highlights

  • What Do You Want?
    Understanding your desires is crucial for happiness in relationships.
    “Figuring out what you want is 99% of the work.”
    @ 01m 10s
    July 23, 2026

Episode Quotes

  • Figuring out what you want is 99% of the work.
    Why you will never find the ‘perfect’ partner… 😳

Key Moments

  • Visual Example00:15
  • Life Choices01:07