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Tim Dillion: It’s Hard To Be Rich In This Biz…

April 09, 2026 / 48:52

This episode features comedian Tim Dillon discussing various topics including his experiences on the show Lights Out, his Netflix special, and his thoughts on current events.

Tim Dillon shares insights about his comedic style and how he approaches humor, mentioning his time on Lights Out and his interactions with other comedians. He reflects on the dynamics of the comedy scene and how he enjoys riffing on different subjects.

The conversation touches on Dillon's Netflix special, where he discusses the challenges of acting and remembering lines, particularly in high-pressure situations. He humorously recounts his experiences on set and the differences between performing live and acting.

They also discuss the current state of the entertainment industry, including the impact of political events on comedy and the audience's appetite for humor during turbulent times. Dillon emphasizes the importance of laughter and silliness in today's world.

Throughout the episode, Dillon's sharp wit and observational humor shine, making for an entertaining and engaging conversation.

TLDR

Tim Dillon discusses comedy, acting, and current events with humor and insight.

Episode

48:52
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where she was basically like, "Now this is a this is what they call a saucer.
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You put your coffee cup on it so it doesn't spill all over your illegitimate
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children, you animals." I think people got a little turned off by that. The guy
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from Euphoria called me, Sam Levenson called me over the summer and said, "There's a scene we want you to do where
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Hunter, you're a sugar daddy and you're paying Hunter Schaefer and Hunter
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Schaefer has you on a leash and you're walking around the floor like a dog. They're gonna have an army of morbidly
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obese, heavily medicated Disney adults. And that's just what we've got. That's
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what we've built in this country. >> Our front line. That's >> our front line. Just 48y olds ghosted
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with Prozac dressed like toddlers with Mickey Mouse backpacks running. >> Well, we had a real firecracker. Uh
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Dana, >> we you predicted it and then we did it. Tim Dylan. >> Oh boy. Tim Dylan who such a funny
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podcast. Such a hilarious dude. Always has opinions. He was on Lights Out. We talked about that which is this show.
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That's where I met him and then we made him have a little special segment on
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there. And he's just couldn't give a [ __ ] He makes fun of everybody, everything, both political sides. We
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talk about so many things. And he he's a great riffolic. Yeah. I mean, I really enjoy at a
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certain point I was just like, "Okay, just feed him something and then he'll
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go on a rant." Kind of reminded me of Dennis Miller and Rush Limbbo and had a
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baby or something, you know? It's like this high energy. And uh he never says
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>> he never says no. Whatever you say to him, he starts running with it right
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away. And it's dripping sarcasm, but ultimately it's always just going for
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the laugh. It's always funny, >> almost always offensive, always hilarious. offensive and funny.
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>> And like you said, you said it well. He's got good word packages. Like to to
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talk quickly on a subject we're just throwing him and then he puts it together in a nice little package. It's
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pretty smart. I mean, it's hard to do. Um, >> it is. He's Yeah, it was very very fun
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to listen to >> and I'm saying [ __ ] I shouldn't because we're just getting caught up in like how
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funny it is to just make fun of everything and >> to to just say whatever >> say whatever comes to mind and be like
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it's all comedy. But uh anyway, here he is. Tim Dylan. Uh one of our new favorites on here.
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>> A [ __ ] me, man. >> So, I'm the only guy hatless. >> Yeah.
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>> How are we? Good morning, >> Tim. I almost bought you I saw these big
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shades when I was on the road at some store on the road and I was like, "These
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I should get these for Tim." But you should have. >> It would kill me to buy him something
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and be a good friend. >> No, I know. It's it's it's good to hear
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about that you thought of it, though. >> It's the thought. >> That's really the thought that counts.
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>> I think I think that's the most important thing. >> Instead of that, I spent my money on
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zingers. >> Where were you? >> I was just back in the uh Virginia run.
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>> The the coveted the Virginia run. >> Yeah. It's just like all these towns and
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then you go and I was actually Dana, you'd be excited about this. Tim will be
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bored to [ __ ] tears already. Duke was playing in Norfolk the night I played and then the next night I went they were
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playing Yukon in that city in the building next to me. >> Did that hurt your ticket sales or
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what's what's the catch? >> No, it made him better cuz I [ __ ] loving him.
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>> Spill over. >> Tim, he's like, "Can you go to 7-Eleven and grab a big gulp?"
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>> I just I just pointed at someone. I said, "Coffee, please." This is early
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guys for me. This is 10. >> Are you really? I would have done it later. I just thought
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>> No, this Okay. I'm I am up in Adam. I'm just um I like the mornings to record,
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>> you know. Tim is a friend of mine. Dane, I'll give you a brief history.
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>> Saw him on Lights Out because Adam Eaggan told him told me he's funny
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because I don't go live comedians. >> And then he came on. He's very funny.
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>> Said something very inflammatory of course immediately. >> And I was like, "Oh, we got a live wire
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here." And uh remember that Tim? >> Yes. I I >> It was a It was a big moment.
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>> I enjoyed that. By the way, I loved doing that show. >> Yeah, that show's built for you because
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he just comes on. >> He knows a little about everything. So, you give him any subject, he starts
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talking, and then we we did it a few times and then after that COVID hit, no one's blaming Tim, but no one's not
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blaming him, >> of course. >> And then we started having like dinners
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and hanging out. It was fun. So then >> he went off and did whatever. >> Well, the legacy is as follows. And
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there's probably more, right? So where was Tim in stardom or Nikki or Theo when
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you put them on Lights Out and compared to where they are now? >> You know what's funny is Theo is a bit
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of a a unicorn in the way that he handles all of show biz decisions. And he we were
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getting to be friends, but he said, "I don't think I'd be good at lights out."
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And then he came on maybe once, Heather. I think he came on once, but it wasn't
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right for him. It's perfect for Tim. It's perfect for Nikki. And uh and then
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we all got to be friends. And then Tim has a special called, what is it called on Netflix?
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>> Uh uh >> I'm your mother. I forget. I'm Your mother. Yeah. It came out last April. I
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forgot. Everything moves so quickly now. I do forget. But yeah, it's on Netflix.
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And I love doing that show. We did a um we did a special little thing on Lights Out where I came in.
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>> Oh, that's right. >> Right. We had a little segment. >> You gave me a segment. This was like
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amazing. I had just moved to LA and I got like a little segment on Lights Out. It was it was a lot of fun and we love
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Adam. Obviously, he's the best Adam. And um I miss that show. I think there needs
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to be a show like that where you come in, you do quick, funny, topical stuff and then every week you got to write new
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stuff, >> right? >> You know, that's a great thing. >> It's a good reason. And some of it's a
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little undercooked when you get out there like my own stuff, but at least you're talking about things that are new
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and then sometimes you stumble into a bit. It's good. Um >> well well one other important
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observation about that because I did a few times too just the finche no band >> maybe 70 people 80 people felt very
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intimate and very good when you're out there like it was close to you some studios are kind of distant too much
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rasmataz anyway Tim comment >> and then you'd be on the show with comedians you didn't really like and
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that was good too because you go these people we don't really like each other
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and we kind of, you know, say things about each other on social media, subliminally, of course, but they're
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here and we got to make the best of it. Let's do a fun kind of topical joke about, you know, some woman who
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disappeared in the Midwest or whatever we were going on about, you know, whatever whatever the news of the day
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was. >> Dude, by the way, I have a question for Tim and tell him if you disagree. When
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Bad Bunny, which I know you have opinions about. Sure. >> Uh, he sang at the
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>> Get him out of here. No, I'm kidding. >> A lot of people don't remember Bad Bunny
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sang at the Super Bowl and at the halftime show. I thought he's bringing out people. I thought what everyone
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thought. What if he brings Savannah Guthri's mom out? That would have been such a smart move.
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>> Huge. And he doesn't like clicks because it would have and she's like, yo yo,
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like oh my god, she's part of it. She's in on it. And that would have crushed.
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They wouldn't watch the rest of the game. That's the type of joke on Lights
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Out the writers would say to you, "I don't know if it's worth bringing up
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Vanna's mother." >> And then you'd have to talk it out with them. You'd go, "I think it is worth it.
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They'll get it. The audience will get it. >> It's not worth it for me. It's worth it
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for you." Because the first time he came on, he goes, "Oh." And then we're going
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to commercial. He goes, "Oh, and quickly when we come back, let's talk about
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Caitlyn Jenner is a murderer." And we go, "Oh, all right. Well, let's hear
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from our sponsor McDonald's and we'll be right back. >> How many episodes were created of that
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show before I know >> what 150 and Tim did a lot of what was what was your job when you came and sat and
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talked to it? >> I I when I did that segment I was giving some kind of advice. I was like a
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consultant and I think that you had hired me a was the bit was that you the lights out had hired me as some type of
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like consultant or something. >> Yeah. Like PR rep something. It was a horrible idea. So the majority of it was
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finding a jacket that fit and then so a woman would just come like a bagard looking. Yeah. So looking like woman
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would come with one jacket and I did no and then she'd go okay and then she'd go
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to the other costume woman. They'd find another jacket. They'd discuss. They
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would talk. You would see them talking in the hall holding both jackets. But then we eventually got it in the can.
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And that's important to really >> Yeah. >> But um >> Yeah. I heard them in the hall going,
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"What's a funnier jacket? Everyone's worried about what's funny."
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>> Yeah. >> It's like, "This one's not funny enough." I'm like, "I think just get a
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hoodie and he'll be fine." >> Yeah. The uh those we we need things
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like that back, you know? And I feel bad. Savannah Guthrie, by the way, now going back to work.
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>> Yeah. Who's happy about that? Hoda, >> that's a tough >> Everybody needs money. I guess I would,
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if I were her, I would take a sbatical, but it is a It's tough. I guess she feels better going back to the job.
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>> I would go back because I would is too much thinking in your day of just being
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alone. Like good point. >> For her to go on the news and just be around the police.
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>> I can't even imagine that scenario. So >> don't you think it's a little
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traumatizing for her to have to go breaking news every 5 seconds and it's never what she wants it to be.
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>> Yes. >> You know what I mean? It does seem a little crazy. And we have breaking news and everybody
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goes, "What?" And then she goes, "Chapel ran punched a kid or something like
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every It's not what it she wants it to be, you know? It's never like mommy's
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home." It's never that. It's always, >> you know? >> Well, how and how and how did they get
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away with it? I mean, we agree she was abducted, but what with the cameras and forensic? Was it Keystone cops? I mean,
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Barney Fe was in charge of the investigation or what? Anyway, >> seems like the family is involved in
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some sort. I haven't followed. >> We're going to go to a commercial. All
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right. >> Tim Dylan has been our guest. Um, >> I want your opinion on this.
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>> Yeah. >> Because Megan Markle used to be we talk about Lights Out and she was lovely
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young lady. She was on Suits and then she skyrocketed to fame. But I always thought when Suits came back, things
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were a little iffy in the are they the Duke and Duchess anymore? Are they how much full they have? I thought she
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should have joined Suits and been an actress again and made big money >> for sure.
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>> Because she likes acting, right? Do you think she should go that again?
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>> She's past. Well, you're talking about Suits LA when that came back.
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>> Yeah. Is that it? >> Yeah. Yeah. Well, that someone from Suits LA messaged me. I'm not kidding.
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like one of the showrunners like, "We'd like you to do a small part on this. We
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can't really pay you and the script is bad." I mean, literally they I have the
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message, they go, "We can't really pay you and the script is not good and the
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part is not big." >> And I said, "Well, uh, >> they shoot in LA."
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>> Yeah. Thank you for thinking of me. Um, I think Megan will eventually find her way
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into some type of talk show. Yeah. >> Um uh because she's failed at the uh
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Martha Stewart route which she wanted. She's was slinging Jam in Target. She
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wanted to have a lifestyle brand. >> Yes. Jam was an interesting choice. >> Yes. Well,
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>> it's it's probably an uncrowded market. Other than Welches, I can't think of too
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many. >> Yeah, there's Right. She's >> she's definitely she needs to adjust her
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strategy, but she I could also see her going back to the UK >> and going back to the UK and saying,
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"Let's give it another go." >> Wow. That's really >> I think they do have to go back and stir
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the brand again because that's the power is to give it. >> You need a jump start.
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>> Yeah. Yeah. She's got to do something. I think we're all a little tired of
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hertick here. I don't think it worked as well as she thought it would. I think
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she was going to come back. Her idea was to come back to America and say, "Listen, the British are really racist,
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but they do know a lot about dinner parties, and I've learned that. So, I'm
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here to tell you how to live like a human being and what fork to use, you pig. You American pig." And I think that
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uh it felt a little condescending because you know she had that show on Netflix where she was basically like now
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this is a this is what they call a saucer. You put your coffee cup on it so it doesn't spill all over your
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illegitimate children. You animals. I think people got a little turned off by that.
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I like when they go Prince Harry is marrying a superstar celebrity from America. I'm like she's on suits. I I
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mean I don't know what they think it is over there. I go, she's not even the
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biggest star on suits, >> but the biggest stars in the UK, many of them work at grocery stores. Like, it's
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a whole different thing. >> Benedict Cumber. >> Yeah. Like truly truly some of the
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>> some of the top stars over there, they it's not like America where they live in
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mansions and everything like that. >> Yeah. >> Um, you know, they many of them just
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work menial jobs, you know, sort of a cobbler or something, you know. >> Old school job.
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>> Yeah. Truly. >> Yeah. Daniel D. Lewis was a cobbler. Yeah. >> Yeah. They don't have
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>> I'm not saying I'm saying no on on fans for her for now because that's not the
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move right now. >> No, it's not. She's got to do something classy.
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>> Yeah. Classy first and then uh I heard on Euphoria, Sydney Sweeney, they're
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upping the ante with Sydney Sweeney. She's going to be an Only Fans model really in the show, which is kind of
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smart. The guy from Euphoria called me. Sam Levenson called me over the summer and said, "There's a scene we want you
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to do where Hunter, you're a sugar daddy and you're paying Hunter Schaefer and
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Hunter Schaefer has you on a leash and you're walking around the floor like a
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dog. And I go, he goes, "But it's only like four lines." I go, "I need 12 line.
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I'm not flying to California for four lines." I said, "I will absolutely do it
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for like 10 or 12 lines." He goes, "It's like four lines." He goes, "It's like
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two lines at a dinner and then immediately you're on the leash." I go, "I don't
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>> I need eight lines or 10 lines before I'm on the leash." I'm I'm You know what
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I mean? Like, >> well, he says, "Is arf arf two lines or one?" >> I mean, it's lit was literally a call.
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He goes, "I totally understand if you don't want to do it. Don't worry about
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it." He goes, "It's not a lot of lines." He goes, "It's two lines. You're on a
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leash." And I go, "Eight lines, 10 lines, and then I'm on a leash." Fine.
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>> Right. One of those thing is me being someone putting a leash on me, you know, is is
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is most of the day. >> I like that you're in your leash, saying hi to everyone. Hey, Zenaia.
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>> Oh, 100%. They wouldn't even be on set. I asked, I said, "Can I at least get a
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photo with them?" He goes, "They won't be on set." He goes, "We're not letting
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you near Zena, Jacob Allerti. We're putting a leash on you. You're going to
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be in a in in some type of segregated area like you have a disease." >> Yeah. Like it's the Spanish flu and
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you're going to be on a leash. Hunter Schaefer's going to poke you with a
00:15:57
stick and then you're going to get SEG healthcare. >> Maybe taser your nuts and then that's a
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wrap. >> Right. That's a wrap. >> Who is your agent? Cuz I'm not hearing a
00:16:08
lot of great offers. >> Uh no. Um >> Candace Owens is behind me recently. Uh no, I have a
00:16:16
great agency. >> What do they need to do? They're homeless half of them now. I mean, what
00:16:20
do they, you know, >> are they? They're getting bought by private equity companies and counting
00:16:25
their money. >> Some of them are and some of them are, you know, some of them are uh in real
00:16:30
trouble. >> That's right. >> I will say that I hate to admit that Tim
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Dylan is very funny as an actor >> when he did Bus Boys. And then I think it would help people see you in that
00:16:42
because >> Well, go to go to Where can they get tickets to it? >> Oh, to Bus Boys. Yeah. Do we have
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>> Oh, Bus Boys movie. Go get tickets cuz we have we have one of the funniest
00:16:52
scenes. I think >> we have a great scene. Me and >> we have a really funny scene and
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>> longer and we're going to put out more footage cuz we laughed the whole time.
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>> We laughed the whole time and I was nervous because I didn't know if I was
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going to remember the lines >> and I was I was pretty good for someone who doesn't you know I'm not doing this
00:17:13
all the time. >> I will finish the sentence. He's very good and he was very I'm not saying
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shockingly professional but with comedians who cancel spots every night at the and I'm like I don't know what
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I'm getting. I'm not saying Tim does that but I'm saying >> right
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>> nobody knows and Theo's never done it and so people might think hey like Nate
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Diaz was a little loosey goosey with the schedule >> but the fact that me and Bobby even came
00:17:40
to sets huge. >> Yes. Bobby Lee, the biggest gamble. And he was on time. Put that band-aid around
00:17:46
his head. Put I mean I was shocked. And Tim would come and it would be one of those things where one time I got mad
00:17:52
because I said, "Are you still here?" And I think we just have to do a cutaway
00:17:57
or something. So he was always sitting in his trailer, perfectly behaved, knew his lines. And then one time when you
00:18:02
had a long list, you had to walk down the line of Bus Boys and kind of [ __ ] on
00:18:06
us all. I said, "Fuck, this is one of those days where I go, I wouldn't want
00:18:09
this many lines." and he had them all memorized. Boom, boom, boom. So, I was
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very impressed. Who cares about impressing me? But I was just glad that he came and took it seriously.
00:18:20
>> Some people wouldn't. And >> I took I took it seriously and and um I
00:18:25
surprised myself with my ability to remember >> the lines because it is difficult.
00:18:30
>> That's the hardest part. Definitely. >> The hardest part really is to remember
00:18:34
because you will think you have them down and then you will go on set and then it's And I've screwed movies up.
00:18:42
You know, Joker 2 famously I couldn't remember the lines >> and Todd Phillips got really mad at me
00:18:48
and it's not his fault, it's my fault >> because I couldn't remember the line.
00:18:52
Now some of the directions was confusing, whatever, but that's not my what am I a direct, you know what I
00:18:57
mean? But it was difficult. The critics have thoughts on it. It doesn't matter.
00:19:02
But it was hard for me to do it and I didn't have the lines down in Joker and
00:19:07
I only had like six lines in Joker but I kept putting them in the wrong cuz it's
00:19:12
you know Wen Phoenix and Brendan >> and it's really intimidating >> and it was really hard. I was coming off
00:19:18
that experience which was a tra trauma traumatic. >> You know what that was like Mark Marin
00:19:23
in the first one like he had Dairo and we >> and he had to be a normal it's very hard
00:19:29
all that just that is scary just doing them in your trailer even if you run them with someone you walk on set and
00:19:34
then the real people are in front of you you can blank because you're like this
00:19:37
isn't what I how I pictured my head because I I was just doing it like this.
00:19:41
Now there's too much in my head. I'm just saying it felt better looking at
00:19:45
Jessica Michelle Singleton >> on set, you know, as opposed to Waqen Phoenix. I felt more calm.
00:19:52
>> Yeah, >> I felt >> Well, we were more relaxed set for sure.
00:19:56
>> It was more fun >> and we would say do it a million times and say whatever you want and we all uh
00:20:03
I like when you go to the one guy, frankly, you're scaring me. You want >> mine is um I don't even know what you're
00:20:10
talking about. goes, "I have a question." >> I don't even I don't even know what
00:20:16
you're talking about. >> An old school like smoke a joint and go to the movie theater,
00:20:21
>> but don't drive. Obviously, have get an Uber. >> Listen, a lot of people are comparing it
00:20:25
to Inception and some Christopher Nolan films. >> Well, it is. I think there's it's it's
00:20:30
very it has a lot of similarities to that. >> Yes. >> I'm getting Dunkirk vibes. I don't know
00:20:35
why. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Dana liked the trailer, but we're making
00:20:38
him go see it at the movies. Well, it felt like a 90s comedy and I and I think the world right now. Oh, I want to hot
00:20:44
take. It's a little discombobulated right now. So then this really goofy, silly movie with physical comedy and you
00:20:52
guys, I don't know. It seems like a good uh relief from the world. >> My my hope is that it ends the Iran war
00:20:59
because people just start going >> that's what everyone's banking on.
00:21:02
>> This is probably the direction it goes if you want my guess. >> Well, I did have a question for you.
00:21:07
This is a non sequator, but what would it take financially real offer to play Car Island?
00:21:16
>> Oh, for me? >> Yeah. To play My Car Island would absolutely suggest it. By the way, my agent is a
00:21:25
busting money grubbing monster and I love him and he's good, but he would absolutely suggest Car Island and he
00:21:33
would say what he says about everything. He'd go, "It's actually an easy flight."
00:21:36
That's what he's saying. I've heard that an easy flight. It's New York to Recu
00:21:42
and then Recu to Dubai. Dubai right in there. You land on an aircraft carrier. You go. It's an amphibious assault, but
00:21:49
we get you on it. No, it's an easy flight. >> Promote your name on bombs when they
00:21:54
drop. They That's a good >> He goes, "It's an easy flight." He goes,
00:21:56
"It's the amphitheater's big." He goes, "It's 3,000, but I'm not worried about
00:22:00
it. I'm not worried about 3,000." Certainly. >> Yeah. It was a certain size. And then
00:22:06
Trump made it actually bigger. There's a reason. >> They're not worried about it. It's an
00:22:09
easy flight. >> They're hungry for comedy. >> You've never been there. You starved the
00:22:14
market. So now that you're there, people really show up. >> Right. When I do when I say it's six
00:22:19
flights and it's 17 hours, my guy goes, "And then you're there."
00:22:22
>> And then you Right. Now, what a great line they all have. And then you're
00:22:25
there and then you're home. >> I'm like, "Oh, okay. Then it's done."
00:22:29
>> Yeah. >> Yeah. Well, uh hopefully Bus Boys has some influence on helping end the war
00:22:34
because Maybe everyone wants it to be over with so they can focus on it. >> Well, I think so. I think we're all
00:22:39
ready for silliness and fun. And I think people need to stop with the the the killing and the screaming.
00:22:46
>> Yeah. >> And the ra and the rage. Go to Bus Boys and not be angry for 90 minutes.
00:22:53
>> 100%. Then be angry right after again. >> And right before. >> Yes.
00:22:58
>> But not when Spade and Dylan are on the screen doing their magic. That's when
00:23:02
you just >> let it go. That's when you let it. >> Uh, so that'll be fun. And, uh, I have a
00:23:08
couple more things for you that, you know, I know you're very busy, >> but should we say where they get
00:23:13
tickets? Isn't the You guys got to get them in advance. >> Advance >> because Well, what we're doing is we're
00:23:18
adding theaters this week. So, what happens is if the theaters start to fill up, Regal or Cinear, there's a new one
00:23:25
um in um, Arizona they want to add. So, that helps. So, they start filling up, they add more. That helps.
00:23:31
>> So, where do they go? Uh, just say bus boy movie and then you go to busboymov.com and then it'll say put in
00:23:39
your zip code >> and then it says here's the theaters by you. >> All right,
00:23:42
>> but I have a story from this weekend. >> I'm going to buy a ticket. You guys talk
00:23:46
among yourself. >> Okay, do you know your zip code? Ask Paul. >> All right, Tim. So, I'm in the I'm in
00:23:52
the airport and this dude comes up and he goes, "Hey, I was at your show tonight, but my flight's an hour and a
00:23:56
half late." So, I'm sort of just fielding. It's like Comic-Con. So, I'm
00:24:00
just sitting with people taking a photo and then they tell someone and they come
00:24:02
over. And so, the one guy goes, "Hey, very nice guy. Looks like Bert Chryser."
00:24:06
And he goes, "Hey, uh, most of my fans do." And he goes, "Um, hey, I saw your
00:24:10
show last night." He goes, "Blah blah blah. I'm in pain. I've been in a car
00:24:15
accident or motorcycle. I'm hurt." And I go, "Okay, cool. Let's take a quick
00:24:19
pick." And uh, and then he goes, "Yeah, it's pretty bad." But I sort of skimmed
00:24:23
over it. But then he goes, "Yeah, it was I was in the hospital for about six
00:24:27
months." And I go, "Okay." Uh, and then he goes, "I've had it was worse than
00:24:31
Taylor Swift's." No, not Taylor Swift. Oh, it was Lindsay Von. He goes, "You
00:24:34
see the picture of Lindsy Vaughn?" I said, 'Oh, yeah. Her leg had all that
00:24:37
scaffolding on it. I said, "That looked bad." He goes, "Nothing. That was
00:24:40
nothing." And I go, "Well, I'll let her know." And then he said, "So, it's I
00:24:44
have all these things on me." And he goes, "Anyway, long story short," he
00:24:47
goes, "I think uh" he goes, "I almost died." And you know what? I remember
00:24:53
going under and I felt I started playing the last Kill Tony shows I saw in my head and I go, "God damn, is this it?"
00:25:02
When you go, >> you're reliving Kill Tony shows. >> I kind of think a draft isn't the worst
00:25:09
idea. >> Oh, we were going to ask you like maybe let's get PE maybe get him to Car
00:25:16
Island. I don't know how bad of an idea it is to get that guy get him on an aircraft carrier now.
00:25:24
>> I mean, I said, "If this is the end and I'm thinking of old Kil Tony, which I
00:25:29
love Kil Tony, but I don't think that's the first thing that's coming to mind."
00:25:32
But anyway, he goes, "I'm I'm going to switch my flight and come see you again
00:25:35
tonight." >> I said, "Great. That's cool. >> I'm going to get you in." I got him in
00:25:39
>> and uh he did show up. So, nice enough guy. Of course, I make fun of him, but
00:25:44
nice enough guy. And yes, is there a draft? And are you going? Well, I I don't know if there will be a
00:25:51
draft. I think there are certain people that want a draft and um um it would be fun to have a draft because
00:25:59
if you really want to lose a war, send Americans. I mean, truly like in in an embarrassing
00:26:08
way. and and because there's two problems uh there there's it's there's cowardice,
00:26:15
sure, but then there's also we have a lot of weight problems in the country.
00:26:19
And if and fat cowards is the worst thing in the world. So if you if Americans on their televisions watch fat
00:26:25
people run away from battle, >> they will never be able to recover from that. Yeah.
00:26:30
>> And the image of the country will never be able to recover from that. Watching
00:26:33
fat people run away from a battle will be the end of America. Just the visual of that, the visual of fat people
00:26:42
running away from a battle. >> No more >> uh will be the end of America visually.
00:26:48
And it's maybe how it should end, but that'll be the visual end of America.
00:26:51
>> Yeah. >> Well, now in boot camp, if the sergeant gets mad, he goes, "Drop and give me
00:26:56
two." Yeah. >> Three crutches for all the watches. It it just the whole army being shot up
00:27:04
with OMIC and going I can't deploy on my shot day. >> Yeah, my muscles are being eroded.
00:27:12
>> I have to wait three or four days. I can't on the day of my shot. I can't do
00:27:18
heavy combat. >> I have ADD. >> Yeah, that's tough. And uh there's no
00:27:25
Tik Tok out there on the battlefield, I don't think. Uh there should be, but
00:27:29
they would probably drop the weight requirement. Drop every drop everything. >> Well, yeah. They're going to have to
00:27:35
just basically say >> they're going to have an army of morbidly obese, heavily medicated Disney
00:27:41
adults. And that's just what we've got. That's what we've built in this country.
00:27:46
>> That's our front line. That's >> That's our front line. Just 48 year olds
00:27:51
dosed with Prozac, dressed like toddlers with Mickey Mouse backpacks, running >> as the Iranians mow us down like I mean
00:28:01
one by one just 300 pounders going down dressed in Disney onesies. >> Onesie. Yeah. They say there's a new
00:28:11
Iranian Disneyland to get them everyone over there and then >> That's right.
00:28:17
Oh boy. >> Okay. So, that draft might not be a bad idea now that I hear it.
00:28:23
>> Yeah, >> it sounds interesting. >> Okay. >> How about the movie industry? Is it
00:28:28
coming back? I got in trouble because I said I wasn't really mad at Gavin Newsome and Carame was just saying,
00:28:35
could we make it a slightly more of a priority? I don't know what we're spending the money on that's flowing in
00:28:40
because it's a lot flowing in, but it goes out so quickly. Hey, I want to sort
00:28:44
of reserve a little piece of the pie to like focus like let's try to get this
00:28:49
back. That's all. >> Tim, >> yeah, it's um they don't you know the
00:28:55
thing about Gavin Newsome and Karen Best, they they seem to think everything's kind of going well. So,
00:29:00
it's very hard the first >> that's the issue. It's very when someone
00:29:05
thinks things are going well, >> it's very hard to >> make them understand like LA lost a
00:29:12
million people in the last year. It's the biggest population decline of any metropolitan area of comparable size,
00:29:19
you know, I mean, in the in the entire country and there are very few. There's
00:29:22
like none. LA lost more people than anything else. >> Um because the jobs aren't here and um
00:29:29
they're shooting everything everywhere else. They're shooting it. So, it was
00:29:31
cool that you shot bus boys in LA. Yeah. >> So, it can be done. >> It didn't seem to change the landscape
00:29:38
enough >> to move it. Yeah. But it was nice to do it there. I mean, we said, "Let's just
00:29:43
do it here." That's a tiny like, hey, at least for awareness. But >> everyone says to me, "Why don't you just
00:29:49
move out of LA?" And I'm like, "Well, moving is hard and I don't know if I'm
00:29:53
going to find a yard house nearby or a church." Like, when I go to another like
00:29:56
you went when I saw you in Austin originally, you you were one of the first people maybe.
00:30:01
>> I moved for about seven months. Yeah. >> Yeah. And then you broke the news to
00:30:05
Adam. You get that backstage that you didn't love it anymore and you were >> Well, I like Listen, there's a lot of
00:30:11
things I like about Austin. I like going out to dinner and getting sick. >> Um,
00:30:16
you know what I mean? Like I don't need to eat food that was got that day, you
00:30:20
know? I'm not one of those guys. I like how brown it is. I like how you, you
00:30:24
know, the air feels like you're smoking all the time. Uh, it's a great city and
00:30:28
I like it. It's three or four blocks. It's easy n it's you can navigate it. I
00:30:33
like it. >> I like that everyone's um a communist but also weirdly Hitler like that.
00:30:38
They've accomplished an interesting political thing. You're like you're a
00:30:41
racist Nazi communist. It's it's amazing. So it's a it is heaven on earth.
00:30:48
>> But I I I found myself drawn back to California unfortunately probably till
00:30:53
the end and that's just what it is. >> Well, did you miss the 14.2 two state
00:30:58
tax and a part of you is like I like writing that check. >> Well, here's the hard part.
00:31:03
>> Here's a good thing about Texas. You have there's you you get to Austin and
00:31:06
you you do have your accountant says to you at the end of the year you have a lot more money.
00:31:10
>> So then you go wow you look at all this money and you call your friends. You I
00:31:14
got a lot of money. So you go down to Miss Vicky's house of brisket and I mean
00:31:18
you you start buying meat by the pound. Uh and then you eat it. And then in your
00:31:24
car, you begin to sweat and feel ill and you pull over and then you go to sleep.
00:31:30
Um, and you go, "Money well spent." >> Well, you get enough money where you go,
00:31:35
I can move back to California. >> That's right. That's right. As soon as I
00:31:38
had those savings, I said, I got to get out of here. And God bless everyone. Obviously, Austin's a great city, and
00:31:42
I'm everything I got the mother ship. >> Well, the mothership's great. And yeah,
00:31:47
>> I can see why comics want to go there. And it's good because a lot of cities
00:31:50
people say you should move. I go, "Well, aside from maybe Austin or New York,
00:31:55
there's not a lot of places that have a lot of com." >> Well, I like it because it's safe, you
00:31:59
know, and I know people might say that, you know, they 14 people were shot last week on that one block, but I'll tell
00:32:05
you this, I feel safe there. Even though I hear gunshots a lot, I still feel safe
00:32:12
knowing that the people that are shooting me, someone may shoot them. That's feels good to me.
00:32:18
>> That is It is good. Yeah. >> So, so where do you where do you live
00:32:26
now? >> Yeah. >> I live in I live in Dubai right now. >> Right now in from Dubai
00:32:32
>> right now I'm broadcasting from uh Dubai >> and I'm incorporated. My business is in
00:32:37
Dubai and Qar. My uh bank account is in Qar. I'm a Qatari national at the moment
00:32:44
and I'm just kind of hopping around the Gulf States to see which one feels the
00:32:48
best. Do the drones coming in, you know, with the small maybe 115 pound bomb, do
00:32:54
they bother you or you just >> They don't bother me. I like to look at
00:32:58
them on my walk and it's just a natural progression of the way things are. You
00:33:02
know, you're going to see a drone in the sky. You can't freak out. It makes
00:33:06
>> aren't a big story anymore. It's just like how crazy is the world when the
00:33:10
drone they're like I saw a huge UFO mother ship yesterday. They're like,
00:33:13
"Yeah, I know." And also the AI kind of blurs it. It's just >> trying to get aliens going. Like every
00:33:18
like three weeks the government comes out and and they tell people they go, "By the way, there's aliens." And then
00:33:22
some like mother is like, "Hey, why is chicken $96?" >> Yeah. >> My children are starving. And they go,
00:33:27
"What about alien life?" She goes, "I can't feed my family."
00:33:31
>> Aliens don't eat. We have to eat down here. Eat and gas and all the problems.
00:33:36
>> What What is the war of attrition when they shoot a $10,000 drone at us and we
00:33:41
shoot it down with a $3 million missile? This seems like a weird like maybe we should change that tactic.
00:33:49
>> Unless you're making those missiles because that seems like a good gig.
00:33:52
>> That's good biz. >> The defense industry is up 40% in the stock market.
00:33:58
>> They're doing good. You got to hand it to them. You know, consistency quality.
00:34:03
>> Is there is there always has to be a war? Cuz Ukraine was the hot war. >> Yes.
00:34:09
>> And then it's sort of still going on and it just doesn't have enough heat.
00:34:13
>> You know what it is? Ukraine war is boring. You're kind of like, uh, it's
00:34:16
still there, but what is it really? >> And it's doesn't, you know, you're not,
00:34:20
it's not getting a season 3. >> It is not. >> Iran is hot. It's new. It's young. It's
00:34:26
hip. >> Sexy. >> It's sexy. It's It's, you know, it's
00:34:31
snackable content. It's snackable. You can enjoy little bits and, you know, check in and check out. It plays very
00:34:38
low on social. It's very brand aligned. I mean is important right now. >> It's protestable.
00:34:45
>> Protestable. It has a live component which is these protests. >> A live component.
00:34:50
>> It's huge. It It's very easy with merch. It's so >> It's smart. It's sharp. It's young.
00:34:58
>> It's now we need it. We need it. We can say we just need it. It's fresh. We're
00:35:04
all talking about the draft. It's just it's it's really important for us to do
00:35:09
these things. Yeah, there's a lot of protests and I sort of have to look closely at the screen and go, what is
00:35:15
this one? It can change >> weekly, but people are mad. >> The the Iran war to me is just about
00:35:24
aligning with brands that support our core values. >> Yeah. Which are Palunteer,
00:35:31
Rathon, General Dynamics, you know, >> Palunteer, >> right? Netanyahu, people that are just
00:35:38
they support our core values and we're all rowing in the same direction. As my
00:35:42
agent would say, let's row in the same direction on this. She says it once a
00:35:46
week. >> Really? >> Yeah. Let's row in the same direction on this.
00:35:51
>> Mine says, you know, the landscape has changed. But, uh, what we're going to do
00:35:55
here is I talked to Netflix before we get on this Zoom call. Yeah. >> I set the table. So, we're all set. I
00:36:02
set the table. >> And then you you come in. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And >> Yeah.
00:36:06
>> And my manager is is great because he I'll talk to him and I'll call him. I
00:36:10
go, "Hey, how are you?" And he goes, "Well, I'm looking at a horse farm right
00:36:14
now." >> And I say, "Oh, that's good. That's good." He goes, "I going for you." Yeah.
00:36:19
He's going good. >> Right. Yeah. >> God bless. You know, we we wish all of
00:36:23
them well. >> I get I get from my agent a lot. It's rough out there for everybody. I don't
00:36:28
know. Is that a positive thing to say to a client? >> It's a great thing to say.
00:36:33
>> No. He he says, "Stana, I heard something you did. Where's your new
00:36:38
address to bill you for the thing we are unaware of?" >> Could I mention a Mickey Rooney insert
00:36:43
that's this topical for this? Mickey Rooney, the crazy guy that I did a sitcom with. He he was f number one star
00:36:51
in the world, then went broke. He called up his manager and says, "Mickey Rooney,
00:36:56
>> I'm broke." And the manager said, "How can you be broke? I have a yacht named
00:37:02
after you, >> right? >> Quote unquote. >> Yeah. >> Some things never change.
00:37:07
>> The money's in agenting and managing out. >> That's where it is.
00:37:11
>> Still 10% for each still. >> Still realtors are getting kicked out of
00:37:17
them for 5%. >> Business manager, you get five, they give you, you know, 5% to them depending
00:37:23
on where >> then the lawyer's there. You know, >> it's hard to hard to be rich in this
00:37:29
biz. Tim, are you kind of bit business savvy in a sense? I mean, do people come up to you for advice like what to do,
00:37:36
where to put their money at all? >> No one, Dana, interesting point. No one's ever come to me for advice on any
00:37:41
issue in my life, but I've only been on Earth 41 years. Interesting. >> No one's ever come to me and said, uh,
00:37:48
exactly, what is your advice on said subject? >> What do you think? >> You've given a lot of really good takes
00:37:55
on the world of global politics. >> Sure. But no one no one no one really comes to the Irish for financial wisdom.
00:38:03
>> Were you doing mortgages? What did you do before I met you? >> I was uh doing subprime loans which was
00:38:08
we were giving homes to people that could not afford them. >> Oh yeah. >> Which by the way is actually nice and
00:38:15
great. >> Right. >> And I gave one to myself and I couldn't afford that and I lost my house.
00:38:23
>> Let's look at a clip. >> So you're all cash. You're all cash.
00:38:27
>> Well, no. I'm finance now. I believe in debt. I believe debt is what makes you
00:38:31
free. I believe you should finance everything you can. I think paying for things is stupid. I think,
00:38:39
>> you know, you should be in a in a in an amount of debt that scares you out of
00:38:43
bed every morning to work. >> You should be in a frightening amount of debt. Um, I think children should have
00:38:50
credit cards, eight, nine years old. I think the debtor economy is the only thing that binds us together as
00:38:56
Americans. And you should have so much debt that it makes you physic. >> A nursery school kid should have an
00:39:03
iPhone. >> Yes. >> And an AMX card. >> 100%. Otherwise, what are we doing? What
00:39:09
are we doing here? If you're not in a paralyzing amount of debt, what is going
00:39:14
to get you up every day to go sit in that Geico office and, you know, talk to people that just got rearended? All life
00:39:22
all life is in the end of the day is hey you want to go over there for a while. Yeah. Okay. After that you want to go
00:39:28
there. Yeah. Where where'd you go? I went over there and then I'm coming back
00:39:32
here. That's it. >> That's right. >> And then you post it. >> Yeah.
00:39:37
>> You know there's a little Joe Biden there for a second. Little Joe Biden
00:39:40
came out. That's right. >> That's right. >> I'm not getting around. Come on.
00:39:44
>> He's still alive. How great is that? >> Are you sure? >> Still alive.
00:39:49
>> Well, it seems to be. No, he seems to be doing pretty well. That's a hard
00:39:52
>> I saw him at the yard house. >> Yeah. Was he having an onion ring tower?
00:39:56
I love that you like Yard House. The Yard House. >> I plugged it twice. So,
00:40:01
>> you plugged the Yard House now twice. Yard House is really one of the most
00:40:05
American places you can go. The menu makes no sense. >> Uh there's no theme to the menu. It'll
00:40:12
be like, "Would you like garlic noodles, the onion ring tower, or spicy tuna?"
00:40:17
And you go, "Where are what is Jeff pad tie?" They're like, "Yep, it'll be here
00:40:21
in two minutes." >> And how about a pizza? You know, you go is the theme here other than giving up.
00:40:29
>> What's your What's your take on how Trump has his energy at 80 with purple
00:40:34
legs and purple hands and is out there just yelling. I mean, >> once my mother said to me once, this is
00:40:42
true. She she was of course a morbidly obese schizophrenic who died in a public institution, but she said to me near the
00:40:48
end of her life, let me just facts. She said to me near the end of her life, McDonald's is healthy. It was one of the
00:40:55
last things she said. It was one of the last pieces of wisdom my mother said before she died. Um uh and she said to
00:41:04
me, she goes, "McDonald's is actually healthy." It had and they're the sponsor
00:41:08
of the Olympics. She said that to me. >> They did sponsor. So, so that is something that I think people in my
00:41:14
mother and Trump's generation believe that McDonald's is healthy and and I
00:41:18
think if you believe something, it's kind of true. >> This is what Trump has kind of exposed.
00:41:24
>> No, I think I talked to this mindbody doctor, you know, and he's like, if
00:41:28
you're really sad having that beer, it's going to hurt you. Or if you're really
00:41:33
sad having McDonald's. So there there is some theory that if you're happy what
00:41:39
you're consuming, it's actually good for you. >> You have to not buy into Trump doesn't
00:41:46
seem to buy into the idea that McDonald's is bad for you. He and and exercise is good for you. Like he
00:41:54
doesn't like to move too much because he thinks body only has so many movements.
00:41:58
>> He's on his own path, but it's worked. >> It's worked. He says you have only so
00:42:03
many heartbeats. So why why waste them? Why, you know, all that stuff. So anyway
00:42:08
Mhm. >> Yeah. I mean, it's it's what he believes and what he believes has become real for
00:42:13
him. >> Yeah. And it just endorphanizes his body in a way, you know. >> It's funny to go from Biden who was sort
00:42:20
of barely moving. And then you get Trump who's the exact opposite. Two older
00:42:25
people, one was very stiff and one was out. One's not out there enough. I thought he wasn't giving enough to the
00:42:33
press and enough conferences. And then there's Trump who's out too much almost.
00:42:38
He's on the plane talking. He's in the helicopter. He's yelling at his lines.
00:42:42
>> He loves it. I mean, he it's not a chore for him. I don't I think he gets in that
00:42:46
podium and he takes question. I The energy that he puts out still is kind of unexplainable the amount of it. I don't
00:42:54
know. >> He likes it. He's having fun. >> That's so much of life is are you having
00:42:58
fun? And I think he's having fun. Yeah. And so then you you don't drain energy.
00:43:03
You're just sort of Yeah. >> I also don't think he's kept up at night
00:43:07
by decisions. I think he goes, "We're doing this and then we're going to do
00:43:11
that." >> I don't think he's agonizing over the decisions. I think he goes, "We're doing
00:43:16
this. This seems like a good idea >> and then if it's not, we'll do something
00:43:21
else." >> Right. Right. Everyone else gets worried, but he's like, "No, this is
00:43:26
here's the plan." >> He loves his ballroom. I think at a certain age you got to have a thing you
00:43:30
love. He loves his ballroom. Yeah, they're building a nice ballroom. The military is building an underground
00:43:35
bunker under it, which is nice for when there are, and this is per Trump, when there are drone attacks at the ballroom,
00:43:41
which he imagines it'll be. Uh his guests go into the bunker, of course, during an event, they'll say, "Ladies
00:43:48
and gentlemen, please proceed. We have ushers that will usher you into the safe zone and they'll take all these Palm
00:43:54
Beach people down to the bunker while the White House is being droned by some foreign power. And then um and then they
00:44:01
go, "Well, the drone threat has been eliminated." And everyone will clap and
00:44:04
then they'll go right back up and grab the >> band is back on stage. >> The band's back on. So I think he's
00:44:09
preparing us for our next stage. >> But they'll get Yeah. peptide infusions
00:44:15
on the way back up because that is the >> Oh, you're gonna get shot up with
00:44:19
everything you want. You're gonna have stem cells in the neck and and that's
00:44:24
what it's going to be. And then outside it's just going to be plumes of black
00:44:28
smoke and ah people screaming. But in the ballroom it's going to be martinis
00:44:33
and like a jazz man. AND I THINK THAT'S COOL. >> TOTALLY. I mean actually they do send
00:44:38
Trump a montage of they call it things blowing up. No joke. And it's like 10
00:44:44
minutes of just some of our video of our air strikes. >> Yeah, he likes it. It feels It's fun for
00:44:50
him. >> It's like during the Iraq war, my grandparents would watch the night
00:44:55
vision. You know, back then you didn't have the technology, but you had the green night vision and you'd see the
00:44:59
missiles fly >> into the things and they would sit there in their Long Island house and they
00:45:05
would eat meatloaf and they would nod at the TV and they would look at each other
00:45:08
and go, "This is pretty damn cool." Yeah, >> that was the first televised war live in
00:45:14
real time. >> That's right. Was that Gulf War with breaking news and all that and then the
00:45:20
OJ trial was just like like that was must see TV. That was the first time I'd
00:45:25
ever actually watch cable news that much. >> Mhm. >> That's the show me and my dad would
00:45:31
watch the Dana Carvey show. That was in what 1997 or eight? Yeah. >> Every episode of that. There was an
00:45:39
episode of that where you guys parodyied the Republican primary. I don't know if
00:45:44
you remember this. >> Yes. >> You parodyied the Republican primary and
00:45:47
I think it you were making fun. I think it was like Phil Graham and Steve and all these guys and and one of the bits
00:45:54
was that it goes back a long time, but one of the bits was that Phil Graham or one of these guys had lost the election
00:45:59
in their own house. Like their family had voted >> and he had lost the election in his own
00:46:06
house and he wouldn't accept it. you wanted to recap, but I remember that watching that every episode with my dad
00:46:12
and loving it. He doesn't speak to me anymore because I called his wife a name
00:46:15
on Pierce Morgan, but I do remember the good times of watching the Dana Carvey show in the 90s. It was one of the best
00:46:23
shows. So, thank you for that. >> Well, thank you. Thank you for watching.
00:46:27
>> Thank you for saying that. That's very high praise from you. >> Very high praise.
00:46:31
>> This is great. >> Yeah. >> Well, Tim, we won't keep you forever,
00:46:35
but anything left for this gentleman? Uh Dana, he's a nice guy. >> Um this is uh one of my favorite
00:46:41
podcasts. This is >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Like I I'm really in awe of how you can
00:46:45
riff and how you stack these word packages. It's it's it's a skill set.
00:46:49
Your your reputation. It's it's not fake news. It's like live to really be here with you doing that.
00:46:57
And we've had dinner a couple times, but it is it's pretty impressive. I just got
00:47:01
to say. >> Well, I love both you guys. It's honor. It's a literal honor to be here. I hope
00:47:06
people go see Bus Boys. Go get the ticket. We'll have a link. >> There'll be a link at some point.
00:47:11
>> And Tim on the road will be on the road and also on Netflix special is always
00:47:15
funny. His own podcast. Yeah. You want about your podcast? That's >> Tim Dylan show if you want to see it.
00:47:19
Bored if you're It's on Saturday morning. >> His podcast is this [ __ ] always. I look
00:47:24
at the clips always. Well, thank >> his podcast is like, okay, Ro going to
00:47:28
go to Tim. Yeah. >> You don't go very far down. You see Tim. >> It's It's wild. We we appreciate
00:47:35
everybody who's out there listening and you guys having me on is amazing. And uh
00:47:38
go see the movie. It's going to be a lot of fun. >> All right, have a good time.
00:47:41
>> Have a good day. >> Hey guys, if you're loving this podcast, which you are, be sure to click follow
00:47:50
on your favorite podcast app. Give us a review, fivestar rating, and maybe even share an episode that you've loved with
00:47:57
a friend. If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe. We're on video now. Fly on the Wall is
00:48:03
presented by Odyssey, an executive produced by Danny Carvey and David Spade, Heather Santoro, and Greg
00:48:08
Holtzman, Mattie Sprung Kaiser, and Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey. Our senior producer is Greg Holtzman, and the show
00:48:15
is produced and edited by Phil Sweet Tech. Booking by Cultivated Entertainment. Special thanks to Patrick
00:48:22
Fogerty, Evan Cox, Mora Curran, Melissa Wester, Hillary Shuff, Eric Donnelly, Colin Gainner, Shan Cherry, Kurt
00:48:34
Courtourtney, and Lauren Vieiraa. Reach out with us any questions to be asked and answered on the show. You can email
00:48:40
us at fly onthealla.com. That's audacy.com.

Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

  • 70
    Funniest
  • 70
    Best performance
  • 65
    Best overall
  • 60
    Most quotable

Episode Highlights

  • Tim Dylan's Hilarious Insights
    Tim Dylan shares his comedic style and thoughts on various topics, showcasing his unique humor.
    “He’s just a great riffolic.”
    @ 01m 22s
    April 09, 2026
  • Megan Markle's Career Choices
    A discussion on Megan Markle's transition from acting to royalty and her potential return to the screen.
    “I think Megan will eventually find her way into some type of talk show.”
    @ 11m 53s
    April 09, 2026
  • The Euphoria Scene Proposal
    A surprising proposal for a scene in Euphoria where the guest plays a sugar daddy on a leash.
    “I need 12 lines. I'm not flying to California for four lines.”
    @ 14m 51s
    April 09, 2026
  • Memorizing Lines
    The hardest part of acting is remembering lines, as one actor shares his struggles.
    “The hardest part really is to remember because you will think you have them down.”
    @ 18m 32s
    April 09, 2026
  • Near-Death Reflection
    A fan shares a life-threatening experience, recalling moments from a comedy show.
    “I think I almost died... reliving Kill Tony shows in my head.”
    @ 24m 53s
    April 09, 2026
  • The End of America?
    A comedic discussion on the implications of a draft involving overweight individuals.
    “Watching fat people run away from a battle will be the end of America.”
    @ 26m 27s
    April 09, 2026
  • Living in Dubai
    One comedian shares his current lifestyle and business setup in Dubai.
    “I’m a Qatari national at the moment.”
    @ 32m 44s
    April 09, 2026
  • Economic Struggles Amid Alien Talk
    A humorous juxtaposition of economic struggles and discussions about aliens.
    “I can’t feed my family.”
    @ 33m 30s
    April 09, 2026
  • The Ukraine War is Boring
    A discussion on the ongoing Ukraine conflict and its perceived lack of excitement.
    “The Ukraine war is boring.”
    @ 34m 13s
    April 09, 2026
  • Debt as a Motivator
    A humorous perspective on debt and its role in American life.
    “You should be in a frightening amount of debt.”
    @ 38m 47s
    April 09, 2026
  • McDonald's Health Debate
    A surprising claim about McDonald's healthiness reflects generational beliefs.
    “McDonald's is actually healthy.”
    @ 41m 06s
    April 09, 2026

Episode Quotes

  • It’s always funny, almost always offensive, always hilarious.
    Tim Dillion: It’s Hard To Be Rich In This Biz…
  • I think we’re all a little tired of her tick here.
    Tim Dillion: It’s Hard To Be Rich In This Biz…
  • I wouldn’t want this many lines.
    Tim Dillion: It’s Hard To Be Rich In This Biz…
  • Watching fat people run away from a battle will be the end of America.
    Tim Dillion: It’s Hard To Be Rich In This Biz…
  • You should be in a frightening amount of debt.
    Tim Dillion: It’s Hard To Be Rich In This Biz…
  • McDonald's is actually healthy.
    Tim Dillion: It’s Hard To Be Rich In This Biz…

Key Moments

  • Saucer Explanation00:02
  • Megan Markle Discussion10:50
  • Memorizing Lines18:32
  • Near-Death Experience24:53
  • Draft Discussion26:27
  • Living in Dubai32:44
  • Financial Humor38:47
  • Generational Beliefs41:06

Tension Over Time

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown