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Our Guest today is Jay Pharaoh tell funny guy he was on SNL of course uh which most of our people are I saw
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him when I did snake oil and he was one of the guests now he has his own game show but that's just one of the many
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things he does uh he's really in there doing stuff he's got a lot going on he tells us all about it yeah six years on
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Saturday Night Live arguably one of the best in impressionist to ever be on Saturday Night Live and so we get him to
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uh oh yeah do he does his Denzel Washington and all these different voices on this podcast so this was a
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very loose entertaining thing he came to play and I think he was had fun I know I did yeah very upbeat guy we I apologize
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but I said we're going to hit you up for all these Impressions and they sound so funny and if you're listening to just
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audio he's got great faces to go with him but that audio I was just listening to it and that Denzel it's almost like
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you can't tell the difference yeah yeah so the very very talented Jay farell have a listen won't
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[Music] you you don't have to wear earphones on theil B I was I didn't have to smoke either but I failed that test [ __ ]
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I we kept lighting them and waving them around I I I wanted to reach through the
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screen to have a hit man he make he makes it look uh let me let let let me tell you this um his weed is very uh
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Rich it's very rich it is a that is $500 million I have made plus weed I ain't there yet I didn't I thought I was good I thought I thought I was good with going in to the dispensaries that now
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look like iPods but apparently I I ain't smok nothing I ain't smoke nothing so I
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got to build my tolerance up with with Bill Mah I didn't even know he's smoked I said wow really okay so oh oh he
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smokes he smokes but what what was the name of the Cannabis that it have a name like Jackhammer or brain damage or you know something crippled hyena um uh uh I
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think it was called uh Diddy house that's what I think it was called that's what I Diddy house yeah Diddy house okay
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dude are they still hassling that guy he said he was sorry I know just baby oil is not does
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not mean guilt baby oil means there's rashes with the stack baby oil baby oil doesn't mean guilt but baby oil with no protection means that something definitely was going down that's what
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it yeah baby oil I know it was it was crazy I keep 200 bottles in my place but let me tell you something a thousand if you're getting initiated after college I
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don't think you're in the right room it's like hey an initiation means you get to do whatever you want to someone
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and so it's like I'm 36 something initiated and the music Biz like come on yeah I I haven't gone there and um you know what I can say is the man has
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always looked moisturized it makes sense why he's so slippery now y he is good eye it makes sense I've never seen a crackly asy anything on P Diddy it makes
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sense now no oh no no yeah he is is Frozen in time he looks just like he did 30 years ago and it's baby oil and they say oh it's something nefarious I go innocent till proven
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Diddy yeah I don't yeah it doesn't scare me but if you see so many bottles and you're like how fast are we going through these yeah and then cut to the 40 foot bed in the back like yo what the
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like what do you steeve from Blues Clues like what is going on I just don't understand it well at
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yeah at some point when you get say 500 700 million somebody in the room says Hey huh maybe we could procure young women and bring them to and you know and
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just brainstorming and then Diddy said you're a genius because at some point the money leads to the said oh like
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space said oh not only should we bring girls we should bring some boys too we should do that let's just right let's
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keep it even it's got to be it's equality it's it's it's equal on both sides oh yeah
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let's just let's I don't want to get in trouble for just bringing girls yeah also I saw a video because it's uh it's
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in my Alo so on Tik Tok always he's giving himself a close yeah it's funny Jay when you go like this so I go um I go they show Diddy playing basketball in
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his house obviously has basketball court yeah and then and you and you go in this wide shot and I'm sorry there's a bed in
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the basketball court I saw that too you see that I was like hm like this man was
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this man was just greedy with the but he wanted it everywhere everywhere it's probably you can't wait to go in the
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other room there got to be some uh there got to be at least a futon in the kitchen there's at
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least something big piece of toast there's a double futon in the dining room a single futon in the kitchen and just stacked pillows in the foyer so anywhere at any time within 3
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to six met he's ready for action I'm starting to have a quirky admiration just for the operation of it just for the the the infrastructure the planning
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the detail I'm not saying it's not evil but man they had some plans there was something something definitely went down and uh something definitely went down in the DM that's uh DM standing for dy's
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Mansion y'all see how I did that damn oh yeah that was good Qui quick with that I drove by his
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Mansion I didn't even know Dana I drive by it on the way to somewhere every day because I cut through the street and all
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the houses are big and some people go that's Mr Chow's house you know you never know people like Michael Jordan's
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mom lives and everyone just believes it for 300 years but no one ever said that was Diddy's house and then all these
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trucks are out there these news trucks and I go by I go hey what's going on here just so they'll w recognize me and
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then uh and they're like oh you didn't hear it did he it's a big [ __ ] show and
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I'm like oh that's his house you probably shouldn't tell me but I'm cool and so I go I will never mention on a
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podcast so anyway he was there and that's my big story oh that was great I I I enjoyed that a lot it's for sale for 60 million I'll give you I go I'll give you one three right
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now by the by the way non Seer Seer but back to the subject do you remember when
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Robert SM did a cartoon on SNL where the whole premise what just what what is no
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what is did he do oh really no I no but that's hilarious that's uh look at there's a whole thing and no one really knew what he did he a producer or whatever but now we know what he did he
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could have done Ambiguously Gay did he oh Jesus that's combining him okay I'm texting Smigel right now Smigel do it on the first viously okay yo can we wait
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before we even go any further yo yeah big shout out to Robert Smigel he's the reason that um he got the Stephen A
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Smith um skit he was the he came to me with that and then uh that's the reason I started doing that on SNL that was him you know what I mean so shout out to Robert Smigel man LeBron
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James LeBron James is the LeBron James is the best player in the league for Mario Chas needs to be locked inside of a inside of a closet without any arms or
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able to touch any basketballs whatsoever cuz he just he just totally terrible it just makes no sense he was a dear friend
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of mine that's what gets me he was a dear dear friend of mine you know also they always rag on
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him and then he goes like this he goes quiet I've been listening to what you've been
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saying he's resting he rest his rest his voice and then he goes in attack mode bam hysterical Rock had him in his old movie The Rock had him in his old movie
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no Chris Rock had him in like I think I hate my wife or something he was he was the other couple he went to dinner with
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and I'm like that's interesting you throw Stephen A in there I would say this whoever gets elected Cala or kamla
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or Trump or Kam Ste Stephen A Smith is the press secretary can you imagine that guy taking questions from the Press I I now I know serve you up J farell so uh M
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Mr Mr Smith what is going on with this Administration I'm not what's going on with this what what what you mean what's going on with this Administration I mean listen we're in
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the dawn of a new we're in a dawn of a new era this is a totally new era I couldn't be believe that it happened I'm
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totally berated incredulous uh Insidious and Leviticus that this is going down ah
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so flawlessly now we actually have a black woman in office now now you know you everybody wanted Michelle Michelle
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we did but you she looked at her husband and said you know you know the hair is not worth it it's not worth going full
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ganed off the gray so she just stayed away from everything and she wasn't even into it but you know the next time
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there's a president it need to be a president called Stephen A Smith because I feel like if I get in there it's going to be a lot of change I'm talking about
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change I'm talking about changing rearranging string endanger in and Power Ranger in you know what I'm at you know Bill Bill mcclinon from the associated press um sorry how about this
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and Molly you wore that yesterday no I didn't yes you did you wore something like it so funny oh I'm mistak Molly that was last night Molly you had you
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have something different we went to dinner last night about that nobody knows nobody knows I'm playing I'm
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playing playing we're all just making up we're fake scenarios P didy to Stephen A
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Smith to uh I wonder if P I have a lot of favorites I don't want to turn you into an impressionist no we got to give him a rest after this one then we'll come back
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give a rest and don't worry Jay this will be the last time you ever have to do these impressions for anyone we will milk you and then because it's too hard
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when I read these in your uh prep and I'm like God dang it I don't want to but we have to ask him but also Gilbert Godfrey's character in Aladdin is that what you said you did early on that was
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my first impression that was my first impression was Gilbert Godfrey Iago what was he the uh the parrot parrot or
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something yeah yeah yeah I used that to get I used that to get uh to get attention back when I was six that's
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what I used six and it works probably right so six years old you see Aladdin and then you get a gobert [ __ ] you go to
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the playground oh it's a killer dude I remember Gilbert Godfrey doing like a you I don't don't really do him but you go to a party and they just have a block of cheese and you know yeah I'm hungry
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and everyone's around the cheese and there's crackers and it's a lot of it's eaten already and I'm like well I
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thought he was so funny I Liv with him for a month my my favorite my for rest in peace my favorite Gilbert guthrey
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joke was if masturbation was a crime I'd be on death row I was like and and what about him as an impressionist like he'd turn around and come back and I I don't know do Rodney
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danger for their kind or he do Bella laosi orice he would just do these Impressions and they were kind of good but they were just very Gilbert and then he'll I like
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how he always rubs his face at the end of it if he doesn't know how it's gonna go he just rubs his face he's like
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trying good one I forgot about that yeah man he was SNL Alum y we here oh did you guys get you you guys you guys got your
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invites right you guys got the invite you guys got them already I got I'm your plus one Jay no you did not I really did
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get three I was like oh snap what yeah I they sent it three times talking 50th oh 50th they sent it three times mine didn't have a plus one it was
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really I don't know what to say to my they said Dana I want you to barely come that's you're barely one that's it um
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you you'll be in the spillover room the third one the spillovers you and Victoria Jackson and John Lovitz will be in the third Jesus Christ you know we
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have we have everybody coming even Robert dowy Jr a lot of people don't even know he was on the show for a long
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time but for one year y'all and I told him it would never it would never work out and look at him now he's Iron Man
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it's amazing it always it's amazing it's Iron Man and then it's that thing of you
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get the Academy Award because it's Goodwill and they did did Iron Man and it's like a really good really good
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forgiven yeah yeah yeah he's he's you know he's done u a couple of things over the last years yeah that have um yeah impress the public in general populace
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yeah but he does a a serious movie then Iron Man then a serious movie than another Iron Man yeah I looked at him and said Robert are you just going to reprise your role of Tony Stark and he
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surprised me by winning an Oscar I didn't think he was going to do it but he did yeah my little baby surprises my
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little baby now he and now he's doing volcano man he's getting he's getting like 60
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million to play the human volcano that's funny volcano man a guy just throws up on you it's all super hot lava just your skin just comes off
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and it looks like uh Raiders of the Lost Arc yeah that's funny let's do that let's do that on SNL volcano man Absol oh God got an app that says volcano
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man's about to [Music] blow what about the spillover room at SNL that's the scary part like if you
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they go I'm sorry you're you're this way Mr spade and then you're like in a room
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and you see like some vague famous faces you're like wait a second where is everybody and they're like cuz we talked
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to someone in this podcast and they were like we never saw you I never saw you at the 40th I and we're like oh my God were
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you in the spillover room they're like I guess there was really no spillover room
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don't invite someone if they're not in the stand just say but the spillover room dude the spillover room is going to
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be Madison Square Garden because there's so many cast members on the 50th oh my God six years of my life and I'm in the spillover room I just wonder I really
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wonder does everybody get does everybody get an invite back to it because I didn't see everybody at the 40th so you
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know I was there on the show at the time so I just I'm just wondering I mean I don't know you know I'm just you had a baked in invite because you were there
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yeah man yeah baked an invite to watch and they sat me me and Michael Tay all the way at the end on the side where the camera couldn't see us that was couldn't get you farther away couldn't get us
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farther away but hey we were in the building we were in the building you we in the building that can never take that away one in from one person away from
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the spillover and look and now look at Michael CH now running running over running uh weekend up Michael where are we sitting this time where are we sitting they actually have a new area
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too I just got a text oh what is it they call it I know this is just cruel but they I think it's sort of py it's called
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The Loser tent and it's behind the spillover room oh my god oh Lord the loser the loser tent dude I last year I had to read just to get into the spill over
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10 well I hope I hope I hope I don't I hope six season six season or five I hope Five Seasons plus don't have to go over there I'm just hoping you know I mean it'll help but no promises um you
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we'll put you between Paul Rudd and Michael Chay it's you know it's the past meets the future meets ant Antman I
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guess the host would usurp the cast right the famouser host get front row yeah I guess so I I guess well it was yeah it's a wax museum last time when I looked out there it was just well I
00:17:05
think it's a concert too so that's that's going to be more fun but who's gonna come like who's gonna come who
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they gonna have I wonder who they gonna have perform because they had Prince they got they had Prince before last
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time I would like Prince to go on before 4 a. I don't think he'll go on this time but last time at the 40th you probably
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stayed for that I I bounced at 230 and they're like oh you missed everything I go well I mean guys it's 2:30 let's make
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some moves here when did Prince when did the great the greatest of all time potentially just guitar player forget everything else I like a certifiable genius just putting that in there
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because it makes me feel good you guys have obviously seen While My Guitar Gently Weeps where Prince comes in it's
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like like 300 million views yeah it's just one of the most masterful guitar but um what time I just this is when did
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he go on this is 10 years ago folks but when did Prince go on cuz I think I walked out at 410
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and then I got did I miss it was it I walked out in high five he's coming in I go give him hell guy I got to get out of
00:18:05
here he he he came on at 4:30 and then after the end of his performance he made us all breakfast it was amazing he made he had a buffet he just yell him out guys cooking
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it up just a crate he just had a I was so sorry I was him cooking breakfast that's all I got let's go
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crepy you got I want you to sing it don't a that's what oh no let's go oh no oh no that a that ain't one of my main ones it's one
00:18:53
of the it's one of the ones the microwavable ones that I do you can do a little snack pack for
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little snack little handy snack version of prince it works works kiss is a great
00:19:04
song that's also funny sometimes great songs are actually funny but that falsetto Rhythm and you know there's a
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new dude there's a new D there's a new guy he's from uh his name is Tommy Richmond and he's from uh he's from the
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703 from Virginia and he's got that song baby take long you probably heard it on Tik Tok videos gotta make it million baby y okay
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I'm okay I'm the millennial here I feel I feel alone and I'm bailing out yeah J are you well no are you saying he's
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influenced by Prince is that idea I would say yeah there's definitely some there's definitely some similarity there
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just with the vocals you know they're they're really high pitched and really um uh what is what is it called groovy
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he's got groovy high pitched vocals so I I I I like it I'm just saying they um they sound similar it's it's clear that Prince has a lot of sons and May and
00:19:59
Tommy Richmond is you know you know I told I told you this Dana but I don't know if it was the 40th but one time with when I was just back in New York it might have been that weekend but but uh
00:20:11
I went out with Chris Rock and he takes me out and uh and of course he picks you up he does fun stuff because he's like
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okay we're going to go here and then we go there and it's super fun then he goes okay we're we're we're going home and he
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goes oh he just gets like an alert be beep you want to go see Prince right now I said 'oh okay so then we drive to some
00:20:31
nowhere spot and it's and they led us through all this [ __ ] and then it's a front section and the front section is about 10 people with Michael Jordan in it I think this is it yeah and he's like
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he's kind of grooving and I'm like I couldn't not watch Michael Jordan who am I gonna look at Prince or Michael Jordan
00:20:48
it's too cool and so I and I tried to dance and they were all like Chris why is he here
00:20:56
why did you bring him and I'm like no no I'm cool I'm one of the I'm cool I'm one of the cool guys watch this [ __ ] and
00:21:03
then I sort of got into it then I then Prince or uh Chris is like I you should probably go and I go yeah yeah for sure
00:21:10
he let he didn't let you stay for he let you stay for black hour he didn't let you stay for that that's crazy I kept
00:21:15
saying he's not doing any ones I know what happens in Black hour I just want to know oh I I I don't I wouldn't know cuz you know I wouldn't I'm not up that late I've never been up that late with
00:21:27
Chris Rock You know what say so I don't know but I'm just saying that black hour what it's been rumored to have is a lot
00:21:33
of Blackness I'll tell you that just whole lot of Blackness yeah man Chris is on it I will give it listen I love the fact that I
00:21:46
love the fact that Chris always uh does incorporate and and Sandler Sandler's the same way but they y'all always
00:21:53
incorporate you too Dana you do it too y'all incorporate y'all's friends man into movies and um I felt like even
00:22:01
Chris paid it for it to my generation because he put me in top five he didn't have to do that I got right that a great
00:22:08
movie yeah um I had I had I had about two minutes on the screen there that was cool uh but you know it was uh it was
00:22:15
fun man that was that was a great experience and and Chris Rock is a man of his word uh that's why that's why he
00:22:21
is go he's he's pretty sane for Showbiz like I think one of the things about Chris is got a good head on his shoulders not a druggie not a big drinker he's just always thinking always
00:22:34
grinding trying to get something going so puts it in man he does the road he does the road I mean it's clubs for a
00:22:40
while then he does the tour and then he ends with the special but it's not that fun it's [ __ ] hard and he still
00:22:47
grinds it out make maybe Jay would find this funny like with this podcast we were at The Comedy Store David and I as
00:22:54
guests and we're going to watch Chris's special live I saw you I saw it Oh yeah and then we're gonna dis have a discussion I never felt wider in my life Spade's next to me I'm I'm hanging out
00:23:08
with Kareem Abdul Jabar all night quizzing him about just so much fun saying did you have a peer in the NBA
00:23:16
appear he goes well no once will left no didn't really you know it's just that kind of fun but um yeah I'm not even
00:23:23
gonna lie when I saw it I said okay I was like I you got to he got his white friends that's I don't know but he it was his idea I think Jay I don't think I
00:23:34
would have done that if it wasn't right from him and he said it once about two months before and I said I don't know if
00:23:41
we would be good at that I said I don't know I said listen I do anything for you if you want me to do it but uh he wanted
00:23:47
to make it more of a big event and then Netflix they were all like brainstorming what ways to do a live show and keep it
00:23:52
fun more of a thing and uh and we did it it wasn't bad it was just he's the sh you know just watching him what's there to say really and then afterwards we supposed to summarize
00:24:03
it y'all did great I mean I know shapel was at home like why the [ __ ] they didn't call me son I was waiting I was
00:24:10
waiting for the call it never happened I don't know why I was available [ __ ] I was there [ __ ] I could have been there
00:24:17
son could have been there but they didn't pick me it's all good uh I'll be working on my 17th Netflix special next year uh it's called Uh did he do it oh
00:24:29
come on I'm just joking nice you don't hear Chappelle you're able to make yourself a smoker basically you got that I don't know if
00:24:42
you are but you got that thank you Bill M thank you so much Bill it's all the smoke really helped you on
00:24:49
that the ganja yeah by the way when I did Bill Mah I'm like I cannot start with your weed I haven't smoked in a long time and I'm not jumping ahead to
00:25:01
this Vortex so I just drank Tios but it's a good good scam because it gets you off guard a little bit because when I'm baked forget it and if I'm at least drunk I sound kind of stupid I go on and
00:25:13
on but it's within the realm of some thought but forget it if it's strong weed there a bit of there's a bit of
00:25:21
lucidness with's them tequila with weed you just you just stuck you're just trying to you're trying to put together
00:25:28
sentences and you can't I was I was struggling I'm just letting you know the struggle was real for me on that godam
00:25:35
show just let you know the the second you catch yourself going oh wait I'm [ __ ] Wast and you go I gotta pull out
00:25:41
of this and try to be normal it's so hard it's scary actually yeah and then I mean everybody's watching you too but you know whatever you're a human being man weed weed weed shops now like they
00:25:53
look like Apple Stores they remember they they just look like Apple Stores now it's it's so weird it's so weird now
00:26:00
how the world has changed thanks Jin Z it's so weird how the world has changed bro well we used to have Maui zoi this
00:26:08
in the late 70s and you take a hit or pass it around now I see Bill on the zoom and other people modern pot smoking is a giant like a cigar size joint and
00:26:20
and really smoking it by yourself like multiple hits yeah yeah yeah okay and then more hits I
00:26:26
mean it's how do you the fact that you got through it but can I do my one marijuana bit for you yeah yeah sure
00:26:34
what spad heard this one since we're on the topic why do people after they take a hit continue to talk so anyway like my
00:26:42
dad you know he uh he never really came to any of my games you know that's kind of a simple one but it's [ __ ] funny actually it's so simple you know I can't believe no one's
00:26:55
that's so good so have it yeah so we should start an iasa podcast just throw up and then interview people everyone know I one please and have it and have uh uh
00:27:12
what is it Westbrook have have Will Smith's company have Will Smith's company uh uh uh I don't know or have
00:27:18
Will Smith in the building too I don't know does he do it yeah he's yeah he's big on idasa bro have you all done it
00:27:26
I've heard about it I've never tried it before but I've heard that it opens up portals and and butts that's what I've
00:27:33
heard yeah Ron White I think was the one who went on and really got into detail really got either got the shits or throw up you know yeah I got the [ __ ] when I
00:27:45
went to puffies they offered me that they said it'll really open up your portals I go sir I don't know if that's what I want right
00:27:52
now sir like a submarine Captain yeah cuz puffy going open up your portals private here's some baby and the portals
00:27:59
will be open soon there we go we're back we're back we're back to puffy back to rning yeah permission open your portals sir oh my gosh yeah well I was is not on
00:28:14
my list uh but people really like it but I feel like people are always trying to figure out life and the meaning of life
00:28:21
and I think just one more thing like maybe this will make things make sense for me so I get that yeah fix me fix how
00:28:29
I look at the world or wake me up or I don't know but it's always a strug it's a heavy podcast turn very
00:28:37
heavy this after that no after that we could we could switch it uh we could talk about we could talk about the fact
00:28:44
that you got people who are marrying themselves and getting divorces that's wild that's true how the hell how the
00:28:52
hell you can't deal with yourself how the hell you expect me to deal with you if you can't deal with your goddam self
00:28:57
that make no damn sense to me Tiffany hadish I just don't understand I knew I heard that voice she
00:29:04
was on the podcast a couple weeks ago I KN yeah did she marry herself he snuck up
00:29:12
she married herself right she married herself yeah she married herself and decided to decided that uh it was over
00:29:20
I'm it's too much I don't know hey in the words of nle Chopper which I'm pretty sure you guys don't know who the hell it is if I was a bad if I was a bad chick I would
00:29:33
want to off me too I that that's literally a song if I was a bad [ __ ] I would want to off me too I would want to suck me too nothing freaky that I
00:29:44
wouldn't do yes these are the new these are the new uh these are the kids now why I can I'm a kid but I'm calling them
00:29:50
kids I'm a big kid they're little kids and they and they're just so salacious and nasty I I didn't know gu was I
00:29:58
didn't know what a GU was I know it is now it's a the GU is your tank your tank that's your goo tain's finally getting some attention Jesus it's taking this long it's they're going everywhere and
00:30:12
as soon as the rights were realized by America uh they switched the name to gu so now it's a GU it's uh is that right Ed a GU I did not know that you know
00:30:23
what they're calling the taint now Ed it's called it's called a is that weird hey tickle my gu Johnny right on the during the commercial yes hold on hey
00:30:37
hold on Johnny hold on Johnny we could talk about this now n I'll be honest with you I don't know if I've ever had I
00:30:43
know I know some bad women that would probably love to like lick up on my go Eddie Murphy I got you well well
00:30:51
Eddie M mm yeah [Music] how was uh Beverly Hills Cop 4 did you see it yet or no no I saw it I thought it was oh you asking me as Eddie Mur be no just how was it as you okay yeah okay
00:31:10
okay no I thought it was uh I thought it was good it was fun man um you know it it was nostalgic but it still had a it had a new flare to it you know it was dope seeing um seeing his daughter in it
00:31:21
also her husband was in it um and uh oh my boy Aon crocky got a little bit of shine in that movie but I think it was it I think I think they did a good job man I feel like it was good now yeah I
00:31:32
never heard anything bad about it I I mean I've heard it was funny and uh [ __ ] to do a fourth one is tough it's a big
00:31:38
job but yeah you know got a great theme song once you hear that you're triggered
00:31:44
in a good way yeah and then you see Eddie Mur walking down you know you're just in it's like comedies I mean everyone on the podcast mentions David's um Joe Dirt movie just
00:31:58
90s comedies that are just fun can I tell you something can I tell you something David that is one of my favorite movies when the when the uh it
00:32:09
was when the porter potty gets knocked over oh my gosh it's just I no there was so many give the whole movie away you already that was the best scene
00:32:21
no reason spoiler spoiler no reason to see the film it's so dude you and a mullet you and a freaking mullet and the Innocence that that character had you were just rooting for him the whole time
00:32:33
man I have to say I partially the reason it worked I thought Dana was I was always playing so sarcastic in every movie and every show and out of the blue no one expects to be a nice genuine guy
00:32:46
that actually is bullied and pushed around and trying to make his way through life and then people like I
00:32:52
think more people got hit like out of the blue going oh I kind of relate to this guy getting [ __ ] on the whole whole
00:32:58
time and then trying to still get through and so not to sound heavy but there is a tinge of that other than it's
00:33:04
just a goofy movie yeah but thank you bud I like to hear that yeah brother you know y'all Y y'all are both Legends man
00:33:11
I grew up watching y'all which is is crazy to be up here right now uh conversing as we look like we're about
00:33:17
to go on a R&B tour with these uh uh black shirts uh yeah I don't know who would be the who who's Michael Jackson who would be Michael Jackson if we all went on we all did a R&B tour I don't
00:33:29
know it would be it would be it' be you think it's you yeah think it's me think I'm the Michael Jackson well you could
00:33:35
move you can move right I mean you could you could move like Michael a little bit I mean I could I could do a moon walk
00:33:42
it's more like a moon slide it ain't it ain't really a walk it's more like a slide or the moon uh the I I don't I
00:33:48
can't after that yeah you go that's the word I'm looking for the weed is still sing yeah I think you could sing more than I could maybe Dana can sing too but
00:34:00
you all are closer in skin tone yeah it's true I'm probably the whitest of all three of us so I might win this one
00:34:07
I can win the latest latest Michael Jackson Bill Mah just texted me and he said the weed I gave J was called five
00:34:15
day are you serious maybe no I just made that up but that sounds good I believed
00:34:22
it I believed it Dana damn you could be a politician really you could be a oh please people I've got some bad news I wasn't going to tell you to the end of the
00:34:34
podcast okay L it honest my shirt's green oh snap wall wow I'm colorblind that's crazy I didn't want to be a [ __ ] comedy killer so I just played it out but I think we got all the juice
00:34:48
out of it yeah it doesn't I mean it does it looks black it looks black I know I listen I go Dana usually wears a black shirt so I it's on me to really mix it
00:34:59
up and really pop and really try new things but I go here's a green shirt then I got on this morning I go I think
00:35:05
it's black is this black or green then I go it's dark green and then who knew you'd wear a black T-shirt then
00:35:11
everything they really flipped over the apple cart I'll tell you that Michael Chay was on this podcast a couple weeks
00:35:18
ago and he goes I don't know he saw my black t-shirt and he goes he goes yeah white standup in a black T-shirt it's
00:35:25
like just just a thing you know it's like George Carlin or something he said that's a thing he says it's a thing you
00:35:32
know I mean I gotta never heard of that I'm gonna wear blue on the next podcast I think Shane Gillis always has black I think Theo wears a black T-shirt uh so maybe there is something to
00:35:44
this yeah we definitely should go out more lazy theater let's go to Largo and call oursel the coconuts and just do like take suggestions from the audience H hello where the coconuts and just take
00:35:56
you know pop and a McDonald's or whatever and then we riff we go we're going to riff off this we're going to
00:36:02
hand out this list of pre-written uh suggestions just read something off that and we'll do they call it stockr I used to open for impr improv groups and then
00:36:14
the next night they go movie style and the audience someone would yell Wy Allen then they'd all go yeah sure you it was
00:36:21
like that that's not improv that's I like stock proov I can do that you never heard of that stock Pro no I love it stock stock proov so we should talk about your six years on SNL are you uh
00:36:34
what's your what's the first word that pops in your head I'll be yeah what do you think Barbara Walt I'll be Oprah
00:36:41
people first word the first word that pops in my head when I think about my six Seasons or
00:36:47
SNL um first couple words uh let's see here life a life uh and my SE changing life changing man I used to work in burlin to co Factory so shoot oh you did
00:37:00
yeah I was it was either do sketches or do layaways I think I made the right decision I like
00:37:06
layaways I like that people are always shocked that someone famous did something before you're like well no
00:37:12
[ __ ] I'm just trying to do anything to get there like you stayed in a Marriott someone asked me once like I would die
00:37:19
to stay in a Marriott my whole I mean what are you talking about like they think we live here and like we went to
00:37:24
some kind of kiosk by the beach excuse me I get a ticket for six years on Saturday Night Live please yeah okay
00:37:31
thank you I really appreciate it it was it was a whirlwind it was a whirlwind and you know listen every job is every job has its ups every job has its downs
00:37:42
but you know the UPS are ups and that's what you gotta really that's what you really got to focus on man you know and
00:37:49
uh luckily luckily I'm still out here and I and I'm getting invitations I'm getting invitations to the 50th you know what I'm saying a miracle it's there's so many people that I won't be shocked
00:38:00
if anyone doesn't get one because just too many so we're we're doing good we all got that email I framed my email I
00:38:07
framed actually the whole computer I laminated my computer that's what I did I just laminated that's a goodidea and
00:38:12
just wear that just just on my neck just Real playing it yeah maybe just an iPad
00:38:18
size check this [ __ ] out guys you get that [ __ ] uh yeah I agree with you that when
00:38:24
you go into SNL like there's definitely people I bet you every day someone knows
00:38:30
you've messing up yep that's that is not absolutely and even if not even if not on the street I'll get a I'll see a email or I'll see a a direct message or
00:38:43
whatever it is and I mean that place is an institution man and um I was 22 when I got that show so that was crazy it was
00:38:50
a little baby how long you been off 10 years I have it's been eight actually it's been eight years who wait a minute now no eight years eight years I've been off for eight years yeah yeah MH eight
00:39:03
years every year there's a new X SNL cast member that is out back into Kate McKinnon is used to be on SNL like at some point you're you join us as uh
00:39:16
Tracy Morgan just calls me a lump when I run into him he calls you a lump Alum Alum I like a better hey you know because Dana Cy is
00:39:28
nothing but a lump that's all he is he's just a lump lump L lumpy Cy I call him lumpy C say it is this what the first thing ever said to me uh it doesn't get any
00:39:41
easier Mr D in a very lowkey fashion when I met him doesn't get any does not get any easier Mr D I think he had a fight with his wife at the time or something so you mean getting off of SNL
00:39:55
and going into reg real show world that's when he was just on the show he was kind of you know just sort ofing I
00:40:02
just remembered that I think I think he was I think he's talking about the workload and everything and and and
00:40:08
Tracy Tri Tracy gives advice he gave me advice he said you need to give them all um you need to buy them all uh White
00:40:15
Castle burgers that's what I used to do I used to give them dookie Burgers all the time who's he talking about the cast or crew Riders right anybody yall think
00:40:28
exist I like him moving his head how you know you never seen one what about dinosaurs you ain't seen dinosaurs either leans
00:40:41
back I told my grandmother about dinosaur she said shut up boy you ain't never seen
00:40:47
one I like after when I do a joke I go like this he goes back great that's better youen one that's true I haven't seen a dinosaur I've seen we've seen a
00:41:00
lot of act outs from Jay I like it I know a ripoff this is not video Jay moving in and out of the frame taking on these characters high quality bits high
00:41:10
quality riffing are you kidding me I thought I thought that this was I've been putting out all this extra energy
00:41:17
and this is only audio oh man no you know what maybe we tape it we give you a clip you know what this guy's a good guy
00:41:23
give him a clip I think I think so please well [ __ ] I was even thinking before it it started I go God maybe we
00:41:30
can clip him even though I look like [ __ ] pie but we should clip him because he we could wait a month and if you feel
00:41:37
like it you can um zoom in on our other podcast Superfly where we just do whatever we want recreate we we do what we're doing now and then it's on video God look at
00:41:50
this we' love to have you sure I saw you do I saw you do Trump give me a little Trump do you do Trump oh my God yeah
00:41:58
they're eating your cats and your dogs they're eating the cats they're eating the dogs they're eating the pets they're
00:42:05
literally turning your puppies into Hush Puppies that's what they're doing you know what you want to know something I noticed him and Lauren both
00:42:16
do the they both suck the air through the teeth you ever seen Lauren look at his when he's when he's looking at his
00:42:22
phone and you're in the elevator with him he's looking down he's like yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
00:42:27
he does that like Trump does the same thing it's like they got oh yeah it's like they ate some food yeah food
00:42:35
sucking it through a straw yeah they're trying to cool it off and Trump's like Trump yes yes I was at a barbecue I got
00:42:42
a I got invited to the barbecue with many African-Americans they absolutely love me they do tell you what I brought to this barbecue actually I brought the potato
00:42:55
salad and guess what there were no raisins whatsoever in the potato whatsoever like part that's good you know he's kind of thinking maybe during
00:43:08
that he's kind of getting ready for his next thought what he's gonna say he loves a riff he doesn't want to stop
00:43:14
talking so he just he forces himself to do that fit in that breath because like that's when he can't talk for like a
00:43:21
second by the way no one's giving him the light at those rallies because he nobody's giving him the light literally
00:43:27
like what else is going on I'm like this is like when I follow guys and they get they ran the light by 10 minutes and they're like what's going on in the
00:43:34
front row I'm like no no nothing get off you're done anytime you start getting shout giving shout outs you you run out
00:43:41
of material you know what I'm saying exactly give it up for ladies we're getting rid oh yeah we're getting rid of
00:43:48
the Communists and the fascists and the moxes we're getting rid of the dog catches and the acrobats the Librarians
00:43:55
they all got to go we're going to get of them Sor no that's good that's dope the
00:44:02
Librarians the library the books the books are filled with knowledge that doesn't make sense it absolutely doesn't make sense have you
00:44:13
have you tried Biden yeah you know it's holy hell hey my keys were right here they were right here in front of me and now I can't find them where are the
00:44:30
keys Toma have you seen my keys okay they got to be somewhere I timed out for 10 seconds but I'm back he freezing I like when he freezes I'm like
00:44:48
that was good you froze yeah he's buffering that's what's happening there we need to check we need to see what perent on he's buffering that's 76%
00:44:57
he's still loading up we need to we need to check he needs a fast charger stick a fast charger in his ass just use Diddy's
00:45:04
baby oil he it'll work trust me we'll see oh my God Diddy's baby or made another
00:45:10
appearance we got a we got a theme man we got a them for this podcast he does I like when Joe just stares off and it's like you're watching a zoom and he froze you're like is it me it looks like he's
00:45:21
not moving what's and then he goes yeah and you go oh you're out of it yeah you go you froze like that okay it looks
00:45:29
guess what guess what and by the way the fact of the matter is let's get real I'm not
00:45:36
kidding around come on I can do it better than you can and do R thing it's a big guy guess I wrote the Bill I wrote
00:45:46
the Bill you know the whisper and then he scre yeah that's a good look he definitely he definitely Whispers and screams but when he's this face that he's G he's thinking about it's like
00:45:59
he's he's thinking about all the racist things that have happened over the last 400 years that's what he's doing and
00:46:05
he's he's trying to be cool with it I can't believe that happened I'm sorry I I didn't mean didn't mean for that to happen but uh by the way if you don't vote for Joe you ain't black that was
00:46:17
racist damn it Joe you gotta watch your tongue but it's cool yeah you're on The Breakfast Club with charlan how you
00:46:23
doing charlan I love charlan Char charl the god charl the god vote for me all right bring that [ __ ] corn poop in
00:46:38
that's what we got to do he feels bad for beating corn Pop's ass say what he feels bad because he beat up corn poop when he was a kid remember he goes corn poop came to me to
00:46:50
school I [ __ ] knocked his ass out knock me over with a CH he talked about a guy he used to beat up and it's like
00:46:55
no no one can find him this story sounds a little fictitious took him out behind a w wood shed be beat the hell out of
00:47:01
[Laughter] him can I do my one Obama bit for Jay okay yeah sure yeah okay this is uh this
00:47:14
is Obama touring around and uh using nursy Rhymes to educate fourth graders all right let's start Jack and Jill went up the hill fet a pil of
00:47:25
water Jill looked at Jack and Jack looked at Jill and Jill looked at Jack and Jill said I'd like to be a jack too so Jack and Jack came down the hill
00:47:38
teachable moment it's a teach teachable moment is he said yeah nury Rhymes you can run with it nury Rhymes and the thought how how Progressive that joke was I love I love the Contemporary sense
00:47:50
of the joke I would Jill Jill said Jack and Jack came down cuz Jill CH that that
00:47:55
was that that's that's brilliant man that that that was brilliant see Obama just told me that I was just being too
00:48:02
uptight on the show and I needed to relax I said well ain't got nothing to do with me I if it was my choice I I had
00:48:09
this character called Shak Obama way before that was the first that was like the first idea I had brought to Sno was
00:48:17
choco Bama and um oh yeah uh well everybody stressing me the hell out because it's really just uh Obama's conscious it is literally everything I
00:48:30
want to say uh don't think it's not going to get thick up in here if you keep talking to me like that because
00:48:35
what I will do these paws are deadly that's right one two baby and if uh one goes out the other one's goingon to knock your punk ass out and that's what's gonna happen because I'm tired of
00:48:46
you talking trash I'm sick of hearing it and I've been reserved for too long now
00:48:51
I'm busted out break out and if I break out I'm going to kick your ass and there's nothing else you can do about
00:48:57
because I'm from Chicago baby and I know how to box and if not I know Mike Tyson he'll come out knock your ass out too
00:49:03
because I can pay people to get the job done like like you it was that would have been that
00:49:09
could well you know we did Reagan Mastermind in the 80s with Phil Hartman where he was a daughtering old man and
00:49:15
then the guests would leave and then he was brilliant so that would have been great that Obama's very contained and
00:49:20
you know polite and gentle we'll see y all later and then behind the scenes it's like you know that's great you got
00:49:28
do one more I know you got we got you a little longer but um I have to fast with jell podcast goes by fast
00:49:36
because he's [ __ ] funny um Denzel Washington I don't know any way you want to try okay can I first of all say that
00:49:43
there's certain Impressions people do and your Denzel is in the magic category like it it's it's not an easy one and you well anyway just do it but it's in
00:49:54
the magic yeah to fry cando doing [Music] um Madden or he Ruden Morgan Freeman he
00:50:06
wound down on that there's certain ones Kevin Pollock doing uh William Shatner but you're Denzel and you have so many Impressions but anyway here we are with the great the great uh one of the
00:50:18
greatest actors of all time Mr Denzel Washington how are you sir the face is good too already well you know I feel
00:50:24
you know I feel amazing this morning because uh you know life is good I woke up I don't have any video footage I have
00:50:30
to take that take that Mansion I gotta bring that back why do I have to bring it back because we keep on talking about
00:50:36
it you know why because because it's it's fresh material right huh I feel good but I tell you this if I don't win
00:50:43
an Oscar for doing Gladiator 2 I'm walking out with something I'm leaving with something that's right and it might
00:50:49
be somebody's mom or wife that's right huh okay pauletta gave me a hall pass okay and if I get that Hall Pass I'm I'm going to smack your mama's ass that's
00:50:59
right yeah all right okay yeah my G my G that's what it is yeah that's what it is right I met I met Denzel when he saw me he was just like oh yeah you owe me a lot of money negro
00:51:13
you know that right you owe me a lot of money oh that's right I'm keeping you hot I'm keeping you hot and you're a lot
00:51:19
taller than I thought you were too to you're tall pharoh and you got an arm on you right yeah you've been working
00:51:24
out what a stud yeah yeah God I love Denzel you got to see him how cool I never see that guy it was at the uh AFI uh AFI Lifetime Achievement Award he was
00:51:35
there you know he was being honored and um that was that that was great and I asked I asked him if I could take a
00:51:41
picture with him I was like yo can I take a picture with you um and I kept I kept the first time I asked he had
00:51:47
turned around he turned around because Chris Tucker this is a real story I'm not making this up Chris Tucker man come
00:51:52
in this come in man take a picture of my take a picture of my son man come on I'm looking like God Dam I I was like come
00:51:59
on Chris I went up to a mat I said man I was trying to take he said man go over there talk to him man he'll take a picture with you man he he cool lady he
00:52:06
real cool man he blood tight peanut butter man he real smooth man he smooth so I W up I walked up to him and I said
00:52:13
Denzel I said can I take a picture with you he was like yeah you can take a picture if you can um if you can you
00:52:19
know if you can bend down you know I'll take a picture with you cuz he was sitting and I said for you Denzel I said
00:52:25
hey I'm not going bend over for nobody but I will bend down for you Denzel so you see me in the picture squatted down
00:52:33
like this and Denzel just got the face and he ain't even smiling he looked like he was just like I I wish they could see
00:52:39
this I know that's a good one he just had to live so yeah man yeah yeah I know that look yeah ah he's great Denzel's one of those ones man yeah yeah he
00:52:50
doesn't he doesn't Chase it he's kind of mysterious still he's an actual real movie star in this love Gladiator that
00:52:56
really UPS glat you have to see the movie anyway because the first one was brilliant and of course with Denzel he's
00:53:02
going to be amazing because he doesn't know how to do anything else does he ever host or he never hosted right nah
00:53:09
he's never hosted Will Smith has never hosted weird weird will hasn't yeah maybe he hey straight comedy guy maybe he must have been invited at some point
00:53:21
absolutely you know because he's Smith well will has always got the invite he can yeah he can yeah you know he comes at his own yeah whatever yeah he's just
00:53:32
a free spirit whatever he wants to show up you know we'll have a hot seat waiting for him you know with a hot um
00:53:38
hour and 30 of material we're ready yeah we ready yeah we're ready 15 sketches made to order you'll find that we're very we're very uh we're nice to our hosts you know we we we we take care of
00:53:51
you um I haven't finished talking so just wait a moment um would you like some popcorn how long did you wait to meet
00:54:02
Lauren Jade do you remember how long did it take me uh when you're outside the office and they go Lauren wants to see
00:54:08
you right now that means two hours it was about yeah exactly yeah it was it was a while it had to be it had to be at least it was two to three hours for me I
00:54:19
remember that I I didn't care I was sweating under my pits and all types of stuff I I didn't care man I was this is
00:54:27
freaking Lauren Michaels I walk in and I meet him and we're talking and um I'm trying not to come off like Donald Glover because I heard about the stories with him and um and then three three
00:54:40
weeks later you know I got the job man first time that's crazy 22 what Eddie was 19 was anyone else younger than 22 to get davs Pete Davidson was 20 and I
00:54:55
think Robert Danny Junior might have been 20 years old as well you know Mean Louise yeah I was 47 when I got the [ __ ]
00:55:03
yeah you're I'm 100 right now so I'm 94 but I I have eastwoods dermatologist so you know eastwoods Eastwood Jay thank you brother and uh I appreciate you sitting with us you're always you're
00:55:17
always out there you're doing dates and stand up stuff like that you do dates and then what's the show you're on right
00:55:23
now I see the promotions for I got quiz well my game show game show I'm right on I'm on Fox with
00:55:28
you David I'm on Fox with you man oh yeah what is it called balls out or something yeah I wish it was it's called
00:55:34
the quiz with balls that's what it's called oh the quiz with balls it just I knew and it shocks me when I'm in
00:55:40
restaurants and people come up to me they're like release the balls and I'm just like oh snap oh that's right I do
00:55:47
people get the [ __ ] knocked out of them that's the fun part that's the that is so it's so much fun and it's such a good
00:55:53
melding of genres you got you got well two shows together you got Family Feud crossed with Wipeout I mean you learn stuff and you have fun and you know I had been talking a fox for years trying
00:56:05
to figure out something but when that idea came I said this makes sense because I look at Steve Harvey and all
00:56:11
his shows that he got and I've been saying to myself like hey boy hey boy you gotta get yourself some of this game show money boy he don't even understand cuz there's a lot of people out here
00:56:24
that can't host but you to be the person it like it's supposed to be hosted boy that's what you do boy if you get in this Ellen Circle boy you gonna
00:56:36
be rich for the rest of your life boy that's what gon happen Steve Harvey made an cool I like
00:56:43
watching people fall on the show uh yeah no that's that just the mashup sounds brilliants Family Feud meets white out and I also got my special that just dropped that that getting received
00:56:57
ubiquitously well man yo I'm so happy that people are taken to it I put it on my I put it on my uh on my YouTube it's up on YouTube you can check it out it's called Jared which is my actual name I I
00:57:09
I really will um I really will encourage people to to comment you know what I mean I'll comment back I'll engage with
00:57:16
you man because um I really just gave it to the fans because I haven't put one out uh in like nine years I haven't shot
00:57:23
one in 10 years so and I got another after this that's coming out that's virtual reality that's already shot and
00:57:29
I'm already kind of I'm almost ready for the next one to shoot as far as another
00:57:35
another special of mine so I'm just moving bro I feel like uh I feel like I had to get on the road you know because when you on SNL you're on SNL all the time you don't get the Reps in like
00:57:45
you're like you can with stand up comedy because you you gotta be on the show so yeah you know I had time you feel me I I
00:57:52
had time and um what came out it was a result bro so I just yeah people just watch it man just just give it a look because it's really it's really a special that's what Chris Rock told you
00:58:05
YouTube is a great place to put a special because that's where everything ends up anyway I'm on YouTube
00:58:10
everybody's house yeah absolutely what Chris Rock say to me Chris Rock said to me you gotta make a special man you make
00:58:17
a special right you gotta make a special okay because if you don't yeah I didn't
00:58:24
do anything good till I was dirty man that [ __ ] are making normals you got to make a special you know what
00:58:31
I mean so I think it is I think it's special man so ah good job Jared on YouTube j a r r o d or j a r e d no that's
00:58:44
gerro j a r e d on YouTube yes all right you got you got it all cooking man really nice hanging out with you we'll see you around around campus yeah see around campus I'm here
00:58:56
I'll meet in the spillover room we'll sit together and Just sh we all three in the [ __ ] spillover room oh it's going to be [ __ ] horrible that would be that' be great we'll have
00:59:07
each other we'll do bits back and forth until um until Prince uh Prince's hologram is on the stage because he's no
00:59:14
longer available we'll do that Holograms in the spillover room all right bye Bud okay take care J
00:59:21
appreciate it man this has been a presentation of odyssey please follow subscribe leave a like a review all the stuff smash that button whatever it is wherever you get your podcast fly in the
00:59:33
wall is executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade Jenna Weiss Burman of Odyssey and Heather Santoro
00:59:39
the show's lead producer is Greg Holzman