00:00:03
This is what we do for eight minutes before each show. Try to I'm not making a sound effect. That's
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just me. I'm actually going to a bodywork guided. >> Let's start with ailments.
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Welcome to >> even stars have ailments. >> Can an AI do this? >> Oh yeah.
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>> You know what they told me? If you're ever talking to an AI, like in an alley,
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I don't know where they think I'm talking to an AI, but >> they can't do certain things, so you
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have to quiz them. >> I think it's like if you're on a Zoom with an AI,
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>> think the person's fake. >> Yeah, >> I saw them act it out.
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>> Then the guy goes, "Great." I think it was a job interview. And he goes, "Well,
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everything seems to be in order." And then at the end, he goes, >> "Real quick, can you just put three
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fingers in front of your face?" And the guy goes, he goes, "Well, look at this." And he
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goes over and he goes, "This is a diploma I have." from this. He goes,
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"No, no, just put put your fingers in front of your face." And the guy goes
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like this. And he goes, "Three fingers." And he goes, "This is a little weird. I don't
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want to do this. >> I'm not buying you." >> And then he goes, "Put it in front of
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your face." And he goes, "I think there's some stuff I just shouldn't do
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because it just sounds weird." And the guy goes, "Well, you're everything's
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riding on us." And he didn't do it. And he goes, "Thank you." Click. They can't
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go like this for some reason. I don't know. >> Should we ask AI why AI can't do that?
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Whoa. >> There's lots of ways to get rid rid of AI. If you suspect you're talking to an
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AI, just slowly you put your fingers up and you go. What does it do? Scares >> and the AI will look down and freeze and
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then disappear. Just go like this. Put your fingers up and breathe heavily. >> Boom. Gone.
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>> I go like this. Go like this. >> You know the other way to get rid of AI
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on your computer? Just close the thing. >> Is that the other way? That's the That's
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the simple hack. Just close the [ __ ] lid of the [ __ ] laptop. >> So, we are here the day after the Chris
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Rock interview we did at the Netflix is a joke >> shootout at Oreium Corral.
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>> Yeah. We went to the Oreium Theater in uh downtown LA. Terrifying. And uh
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>> way downtown, >> super far. And >> lots of oneways. We made it as hard as
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possible for Chris to come and have fun and be in a good mood. And the crowd was
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just every everyone that got in was like, "Fuck, are we here yet? My god."
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>> Parking mayhem. Random strangers uh in the intersection. You get the drill.
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>> Knife and neck, needle and leg. >> Hey, how who Hey guys. Hey Netflix is a
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joke festival. Got 500 shows. We got one with Spade and Carvy. Um let's bury it
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here. about uh Wednesday at 6. Wednesday at 6 fol like go away. You're almost almost
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Arizona. Just downtown. Well, that won't be good. I mean, they couldn't sell
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tickets on a night like that. Probably be a dead audience. Wrong. >> Wrong.
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>> Wrong again. >> Nice try, Netflix. >> I wanted to say, listen, a lot of our
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audience work. Well, some some people work that are >> Well, there's a few people.
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>> It would be difficult to get to basically another state at 6:00 on a Wednesday. The tennis is not moving.
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>> Mort borderline redonkulous, but we got there. Chris showed up. We I haven't
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seen Chris in a while. We did have a great time. He always brings it. He didn't walk through it. He was very
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funny. It was very lively fun. >> Uh the crowd was very lively. We got on a roll setting Chris up asking Chris
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questions and he had a lot of very funny rejoinders. I don't want to give it
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away. It is hard to think of stuff to ask like a friend because a we've interviewed him before. B
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>> you just don't want to sound like a trit idiot of like when did you get your
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first break? You know that kind of stuff. >> So we sort of meandered into comedy and
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>> jokes and then people he's met, things he's done and then of course it just
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kind of rolls from there. We just jump on it. But it worked out really well. I thought I thought it was really good.
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>> Check it out. This is good. The timing works. >> That's coming up this week.
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>> Yes. They tried to stop us and it didn't work. >> Yeah. They tried to do everything again
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against us to make it not work and it worked. >> We're not victims, but
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>> there's like 5,000 shows. If you had money for There's a great comedy
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festival is Netflix. It's too much of a good thing. >> I think it's like literally they have to
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sell 200,000 tickets in a week. Yeah. uh to fill all the places. So there are very famous comedians playing arenas and
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stadiums where it's like not it's hard to sell it out. I mean, look, I never
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Netflix is a joke. Always struck me. I'm going to suggest that they kind of modify it.
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>> Mhm. >> Like next is Netflix is such a joke, you know, or kind of a joke, you know.
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Netflix is such a joke festival. Could you think of any, David, right now as I set you up for a
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>> No, I was trying to think. >> Can you think of something? You're
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usually very fast. >> No, I'm slow today. I was thinking of just canceling it all together. No, I
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think if they have 140 shows, I think they mentioned last night and you've got
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Shane Gillis and Melany and Theo >> Chappelle, everybody. >> I mean, you can't think of anyone's not
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doing a show this week >> or a podcast or this or a Kill Tony >> and they all individually do well. But
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if you smash them together and if let's say you only have a million dollars to
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spend on tickets, >> you're can only see 10% of the shows. >> Yeah. You can only see
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>> 40 shows. >> But I people at Netflix in the inner sanctum, I mean, they're well intended.
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They're very excited about the festival, but that you can get a little too exuberant. Hey, Ziggfrieded,
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shall we go to 300 shows? Oh, I like it. Yes. I'm going to say something crazy to
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you, Groford. Make up the names. >> Yeah. Could we go to 500 shows? Yes. >> 500 shows.
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>> Well, they had a golf tournament to start it all off Monday, so I went to
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that and uh that was fun seeing a bunch of comedians out of their element and a few football players.
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>> Did someone put a camera on this? Well, Fortune Feamster was there on Whole Six
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with Tom Papa and they interviewed everyone before they went on. We had to sit in chairs. It was kind of fun.
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>> Fortune Feamster and Tom Papa. I like these names. >> Yeah, these are uh they have a Netflix
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>> uh podcast. And so I played with Santino, Bert Chryser. They just randomly threw
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everyone together. It was pretty fun. >> Mhm. >> I saw your Bill Burrs, your Will
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Ferrells, your uh your random Devontto. >> He's a great golfer. I mean, seriously.
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I think >> anybody >> I think Santino, the one I played with I think so. Whiskey ginger.
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>> Yep. I played with him before and he's very good. He's very serious.
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>> He's getting a card. Go. It was a little I'm like, "Let's relax. Let's
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>> Hey, you're slow and play. Okay. Pick it up." >> Yeah. Exactly.
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>> He never said that. >> And then and Bert and I were just like kind of medium, so we're just doing it
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to screw off. But Oh, Michael Pñena won. Not a comedian. Great actor. Not a comedian. What's
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going on? >> Getting wasted in nightclubs every night. >> Fixed. Rigged.
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>> Rigged. >> Right. >> Uh-huh. >> Yeah. >> H. >> So, that happened.
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>> Anything else happened? That's it. >> Is it listed anywhere? I can't get a
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hand. Like, are we in the festival right now? Is this technically Are we part of
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the festival or is this outside the >> No, this is outside. >> Okay.
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>> Are we Is it weirder that we're doing it like this and not on Zoom? Do you think
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anything's different? Well, yeah, cuz normally I just look at you on the Zoom
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and I go, "Hey, like this." So, now we're just uh you know, that's why I'm
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going to a chiropractor at 4:00 today because of >> Oh, yeah. >> Well, David
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>> Dana's got a little bit of the spade to >> one of these days. Let's get a table and
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we'll just go across the table. >> I would like that. >> Joe Rogan does it. Maybe it works.
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>> Yeah. >> Call me crazy, but why not do a Joe Rogan? He has 70 million and we only
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have 65 million. >> He's right. We have a table here from Z Gallery. >> Seriously,
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>> I know this table is kind of >> Yeah, our necks have to be saved. We
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have to do it orthopedically at this point. >> Just going like this. Do you know why my
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neck hurts? Cuz last night going this to Chris Rock. I'm like this. I'm like,
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>> "Yes, Chris. Interesting. Chris." >> Oh, yeah. >> That's for an hour and a half. And I try
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to look over this way once in a while. Then he >> starts again. I'm like,
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>> "Yeah, I was hoping he'd go real quiet and I could save my neck and go over
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like this." and kind of go to you. But no, >> I know you didn't look at me once. You
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were like this with me. >> Talk to the fist. >> Our guys are here going, "Hey, we don't
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there's no we got no skin in the game. What do you want to do? Put them on top
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of each other? I know. Just tell us what to do. We don't care. >> We But we had a good time." And anything
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else? What was your week like other than this allconsuming? >> Oh goodness. The cows and the horses and
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the nature. >> Your horse is going to have a baby. I don't want to give a spoiler. July and
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um we're with real authentic rancher people. I said, "Is it going to take
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them to a birthing place or anything?" That would be ridiculous. They'll have
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it right here in the field. But what if something goes wrong? I mean, I've seen
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all creatures, great and small. I mean, if you get a picture, you see me and and
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I'm like here up into the horse trying to pull the baby out. >> That's what my fear is. That's my joy.
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>> But that's that's what happens. Do you need me up there for that?
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>> You just go and see the meat. What? >> Do you need me up there to help you?
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>> Oh, yeah. I've got a room all set up for you. >> Heather can film it.
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>> Yeah. >> You go elbow deep. >> I've done it before. >> You have?
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>> Where? How? >> And with who? >> I'm talking about man to animal.
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>> Oh, yeah. Not with an animal. I don't know what's I I don't even want to put I
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don't even want to think about this. So, um, yeah, I just came down to LA, checked in on a hotel.
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>> Let's see if I have anything interesting to talk about. >> I, uh, ordered room service.
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>> Oh. Oh, yeah. Do you want to talk about your room service? Is there anything
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there? >> I don't have a real chunk on it. It's just, uh, >> you know, I'm always trying to just be
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mellow. I mean, I'm not like, get the food in here now. Get out. You know, I
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go into nice guy mode and I don't even want them to carry the tray. And there
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was this young woman who came twice yesterday and she was uh really strong. I kept I'll take that for you. He goes,
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"Oh, don't worry about it." So I realize >> it's not that he's that strong. It's I'm
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that weak. You know, it's like cuz they're like 40 lb trays. >> Yeah. She just goes, "I'm okay." Yeah.
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>> Not a problem. And I go, "I'll get the door. You don't have to.
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>> Okay." So I like when they put the little cork in the door. They put the
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little holder. They got a whole system. Stay out of my way, please. I got this. I'm like, I can handle the lemons if if
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they're in little cutlets. >> Yeah. I I always try to fake help. I do a lot of this. Do you want me to? Then I
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clear the way a little bit and Yeah. Literally doing nothing. >> Well, I just try Do you want this? Do
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you want shrimp sauce? Do you want No, no, no. Fine. Fine. Do you want anything else? No. No. Fine. Fine. I just make
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sure, you know, we stay in hotels a lot, folks. It's it's uh just we do. And
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that's why most of our bits are around travel and hotels. And what are you going to do? I have a big question for
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you. I don't mean to break the internet, but when you get your toast, >> ah,
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>> is it too squishy? Because they wrap it in plastic. >> No. Well, what hotel? Where are you when
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you tell us anywhere? >> The problem is they don't leave it open. So, you get it. And the point of toast
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is the toastiness. And so, I never throw a fit, >> isn't it? >> Well, for it to be toasted, not
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>> or just give me bread because it's toast and they wrap it up. Now it's going to
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be trapped in its own steam and it's [ __ ] squishy >> and I I I call down.
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>> Well, there are places I've worked and stayed in the middle of West Virginia.
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That's we don't we'll cut that. But anyway, no. Where um room service, please? Oh,
00:12:27
we don't have any room service, but there's a menu and as a pizza place like
00:12:32
three miles away. I don't have a car, so I just hike over. Let's talk for just a quick second about
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upgrading your energy game because caffeine doesn't have to be boring. >> No. Five. Our energy shots are changing
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confetti style notes. celebration in a bottle and somehow you get all that flavor with zero sugar, no
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cake, no guilt. >> So it's So it's all cake, no guilt. >> On top of that,
00:13:19
>> but you're not eating a real cake. >> You're not eating a real cake. It tastes
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like cake. On top of that, you're getting as much caffeine as a 12 ounce premium cup of coffee without the sugar
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crash. And since it's just a 2 oz shot, it's easy to take with you wherever the
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store and online at www.fourenery.com 5 hour energergy.com or Amazon today. I have a story that's
00:14:03
cold off the presses. The Met Gal, the Met Gala, it's been so far away from the time this airs. But I will tell you,
00:14:12
oh, but it'll never end in our minds >> because I asked Rock last night. I go,
00:14:16
"Do you go to the Met Gala or did you not have anything stupid enough to wear?"
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>> And he said he went last year. But oop, spoiler. But when I was watching some of
00:14:24
the people, and here's my question. >> Why is that a spoiler? >> He said he went last year. Spoiler.
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>> Yeah, >> it makes no sense. >> But still, listen, I just gave money.
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Okay, I gave the whole podcast away. >> So, when I see people and they go through the outfits and they go through
00:14:42
who's had a few nips and tucks, I want to make a petition for Margot Robbie to
00:14:46
never touch her face. This is someone who has such I was watching Weathering Heights with a W with the Wu. Everyone
00:14:54
says Weathering Heights and I go like this. I saw it. Weathering Heights. No. Weathering.
00:15:01
>> Thank you. >> Weathering Heights, right? >> A remake. Doesn't mean it's not a good
00:15:06
movie, but we've seen it before, >> right? >> It was shot a little bit like Young
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Frankenstein. >> He always looks a little bit like a Frankenstein. He's very good-looking,
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great actor, but look, he always I always see a Frankenstein when I see him. >> He's a stud. And then when you ever hear
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him really talk, I go, "Oh, that's your accent." Cuz I'm like, he's always
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sounds like on Euphoria. >> Yeah. >> Sounds like the >> Well, here's my question for you. So, in
00:15:29
movies now, it's cause celeb. It's what you do is you've got the the uh the male
00:15:34
star and the female name but might be married whatever but then they floated out like hey there's some
00:15:40
extracurricular activities happening happening in the trailers during the shoot and they did it with Margot Robbie
00:15:46
and Jason got out. What's his name? >> Jacob Allerti. >> Jacob Alerty.
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>> And they they make it like it's always right when the movie comes out.
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>> Are they hooking up? And it makes you go oh I wonder if I can see the movie if I
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can tell if there's any chemistry. Well, that's what makes you see the movie. Are
00:16:01
they Is this simulated sex and pretend or they like get these cameras out of here kind of thing?
00:16:06
>> I heard they started the movie with one boner and then after that nothing.
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>> Did he have the boner? >> I did not know that. I just said someone
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was By the way, they put it in an interesting situation to turn people on. The guy was getting hung like killed.
00:16:20
>> Yeah. >> And he gets a boner and I'm like that's where you throw it?
00:16:23
>> Yeah. That was when I knew this was my kind of movie. The first scene a guy
00:16:27
gets hung and m And then they show that he's he's excited. >> Why was he excited?
00:16:33
>> Well, you know, the wiener wranglers, what they call them, wiener wranglers,
00:16:37
did a prostesis, but I guess you know, you >> you went to where was it? Arizona State.
00:16:43
>> Yes. When you are affixiated, you get vis aroused. Now, some people do it like
00:16:49
in a closet and then they they come to or something. No pun intended. But um yeah, that was uh So anyway, it was
00:16:56
good. But after that, I heard there wasn't enough sex. >> They wanted runchy sex. That's the way
00:17:02
it was. >> I'm maybe I'm oldfashioned, but >> yes, >> I'll just say this for filmmakers and I
00:17:08
this I don't know if this is a hot take. >> More boners. What is it? >> No, it's more the unrequited and they're
00:17:14
using it to a point, but we don't. It's just that they really want to have sex,
00:17:18
but they can't have sex. It's all about that tension. you know, the actual sex
00:17:23
is is not as interesting as a film as >> Oh, yeah. I fast forward to that >> for more more tease and more, you know,
00:17:30
>> so when this movie weathering, was there a lot of tease and that was good or
00:17:35
they're not enough? >> There was I mean, the whole book and everything is about that cuz they he's a
00:17:39
he's adopted and he comes in the house and they just have this tomboy kind of
00:17:44
relationship and then they realize they grow up and they're all hormonal and
00:17:47
horny and then they're both good. marry your brother, get out. >> I I saw a clip the other day. I was
00:17:54
watching it for a little bit and I was like I didn't get what was going on. So,
00:17:57
he had come back and he's her brother. >> Well, like not not by birth, I believe.
00:18:03
>> We're going to get letters. >> No, I don't know. I mean, listen, she
00:18:07
Anyway, the point was gorgeous. And I know at some point someone's going to get to her and go, you should do a
00:18:13
little bit of this. Nothing. Do nothing. Um she was extraordinary in a movie that
00:18:19
wasn't a hit. I think it was called Babylon. >> Oh yeah, Babylon. Is that with Brad?
00:18:24
>> And her performance in that was like >> next level. >> That starts with like an orgy, right?
00:18:30
>> Yeah. It's just it's a wild movie. I don't know. Maybe audiences didn't quite
00:18:34
connect to it. It like comes in the middle of the movie like just this crazy sex craze intensity around the
00:18:42
early days of film. >> Was it Baz Lurman or who did that one? Yeah, >> it was.
00:18:46
>> Yeah. Or his brother, Edward Lurman. >> Okay. >> One of the Lurman brothers.
00:18:51
>> That whole family. Um, >> oh, here's I didn't like. And oh, by the
00:18:57
way, the in political news, there's a big mayor race here in town. >> Spencer Pratt.
00:19:02
>> Spencer Pratt is getting a lot of chatter here in town because uh for better, for worse, there's
00:19:08
uh there's the old guard of mayor Karen Bass. >> Yeah. And if people aren't happy, they
00:19:14
look to someone else and they're like, "What about Spencer? What does he know
00:19:18
about this?" >> And he makes some good points. >> Well, his platform is a little out
00:19:22
there. He wants to clean up the streets, lower crime, and help the homeless get elsewhere. Um, he
00:19:33
wants to lower taxes, and have a financial boom. And he wants it to become kind of a a jewel of the world.
00:19:43
What's that about? Are those goals anyone would really want? >> I don't like that angle. Also, his only
00:19:48
caveat is any >> he can't run on a platform or clean up the city and make and make it become a
00:19:54
jewel of the world. >> Yeah. And he says everyone will get their own reality show. He doesn't need
00:19:59
to add that. >> He wants to rename LA the hill. >> No, I think he makes some good points.
00:20:05
Can he come through? I don't know. But at least he's getting attention by
00:20:10
talking and saying some things you like to hear, which happens around this time of year before election. But I do think
00:20:15
that if he's he seems serious about it, he was caught in the fires where they
00:20:20
burned his house down and uh like like this did he's like coming back saying
00:20:26
>> you wronged me because they none of the money seems to be going to the victims
00:20:30
of the fire, Aladena or >> Palisades, >> right? And there there are what they
00:20:36
call secular trends that are not really related to politics in a sense is that we give our public employees um
00:20:46
pensions. >> In the olden days, you get your pension and you were kind of going to the stars
00:20:51
in about five or eight years. Now you get your pension at 53 and you live to 102.
00:20:58
>> Yeah. >> And there's inflation bumps. So it's happening in Japan all over the world
00:21:02
that people just don't want to check out. They're liking it so much and they're getting government money and
00:21:08
then it goes for three decades instead of two two years. Does that make any sense?
00:21:12
>> So some so you start to run out of money the government >> and then the p then what you can't get
00:21:18
the money for clean up the city or fight crime or or the money to do forest management around fireprone areas. That
00:21:26
costs money to have guys go in there with a rake. You got to pick and choose your fights on those. Uh I I did I do
00:21:32
think it was >> crazy that >> Oh, who just apologized to the Oh, a judge apologized to the guy that
00:21:44
tried to shoot Trump >> cuz the conditions or the way he was being held. >> I mean, but come on. I mean, like my dad
00:21:51
said, don't go to jail. It's not fun. Good thing about jail is that's where
00:21:57
bad guys go and it's not great. >> Yeah. >> Not supposed to be. Right. So
00:22:01
>> when you do a crime, >> I get it should it should all be enough to be like humane. Of course, but
00:22:07
>> I I don't like doing one of these sort of numbers where you're running in with
00:22:12
a gun shooting and then they're like, "Hey, sorry. It was it was a total
00:22:15
hassle for you and you got arrested." >> Um yeah, a judge just shouldn't say
00:22:20
that. Just say, "Here's my judgment. This or that." Don't throw in that.
00:22:23
That's a weird weird thing. It's like when Mandami someone tried to stab
00:22:27
someone and got shot and then he went to the hospital and apologized to them. It's like
00:22:31
>> well it all comes from this one basically too soft idea is that all people are good and all people are born
00:22:37
good and so if someone's behaving badly they were let down by society. So the
00:22:42
the oppressor and the oppressed are the same. the victim and the perpetrator are
00:22:47
the same or in some ways the perpetrator gets is people feel more empathy toward
00:22:54
because wow what made him do that cuz he's a great person she >> right it's all in my book how to solve
00:23:01
everything >> I know >> by Dana Flaro >> yeah it is just sometimes that rubs me
00:23:07
the wrong way I don't know about anyone else >> you just you just really you think about
00:23:10
a city if you're going to go visit a city what's it like and you can hear a
00:23:13
thousand things if you hear uh it's it's clean and safe. Oh, let's go there.
00:23:18
Yeah. >> So, you every city needs to work toward that. >> Try to get back to that.
00:23:23
>> Get back to it's a clean safe city that you want to visit and then the business
00:23:27
comes in, tax revenue rises. It's all in my book. Hey everybody, I know what to
00:23:34
do. >> That is a good name. Hey everybody, come to me for the answers. >> Which comes about this catchphrase that
00:23:41
that I it's not a catchphrase. It was something Mike Tyson said. So last night
00:23:45
being silly in the car on the way to the gig, >> which I just told the story of Tyson,
00:23:50
who I love the clips of him. He's on with some radio DJ and the radio DJ says, "So you're voting for Trump?" And
00:23:57
Tyson with this goes, "Yeah, I I vote for Trump. I'm voting for Trump." And
00:24:01
then he goes, "What are you going to do about it?" And then the guy gets scared.
00:24:06
He's like, "Well, I just kind of saying, "No, what are you going to do about it?
00:24:08
I'm voting for Trump. So what what are you going to do about it?" So, I just
00:24:11
thought, "What are you going to do about it?" >> It's funny because the guy was like,
00:24:14
"Well, I don't know if you should vote for him because this is He goes, "Yeah,
00:24:17
but what are you going to do about like how are you going to stop me because I'll knock you the
00:24:21
>> Right." But he does he's seated, but he does the thing of like you go like this
00:24:25
like like make your move. What are you going to do about it? What are you What are you going to sit over there? What
00:24:29
are you going to do about it? I'm vote for Trump. What are you gonna do about
00:24:32
it? I just think what are you going to do about it, you know, is a funny answer because also it could when you're with
00:24:39
another guy and especially Mike Tyson, guys in line at the bank, you bump into someone. I don't I don't know if we've
00:24:45
talked about this where with with women banks don't exist anymore. >> Like if you're in line at the bank, it's
00:24:52
a normal thing. I'm in touch with reality. When you're on the bread line,
00:24:55
>> okay, you're not on your online account. >> When I'm buying milk for 10 cents a
00:24:58
gallon or whatever it is, >> yeah, you get in a scuffle, >> right? and someone bumps into you, there
00:25:02
is a chance any time in the day as a guy you can get in a fight or beat up. >> And I think with women, it's not it
00:25:09
doesn't always cross their mind. But with me, every time you're in a car road
00:25:12
rage, if this guy cuts me off and gets out of the car, he's going to beat the
00:25:15
[ __ ] out of you. >> So that can happen. So when Mike Tyson says to you, "What are you going to do
00:25:19
about it?" You know what he means? He's like, >> "Fight me right now.
00:25:22
>> It's not going to change my mind, but what are you going to do as a man?"
00:25:25
Yeah. >> It's It's so funny. I got pulled over for a little bit of speeding ticket. And
00:25:29
I was just thinking of Tyson in that moment. He goes, "Oh, you're going as
00:25:32
fast as I go." >> Yeah. So, what are you going to do about it? Well, I'm going to give you a
00:25:36
ticket. Yeah, but what are you going to do about it? >> Yeah, I was going over speed limits.
00:25:40
What are you going to do about it? I went over. What are you going to do about it? And I should stop that.
00:25:45
>> Are you going to I think it means are you going to physically stop me from
00:25:49
doing something? And you're not, >> right? It it's helpful if if you're 220
00:25:53
pounds of solid muscle with giant giant lethal hands that could kill you with one punch. That is helpful. Um I may not
00:26:00
have the size to be physically threatening, but anytime you say, "What are you going to do about it?" Hey,
00:26:05
you're in the wrong line at the bank. You're supposed to start. I went over
00:26:09
this line. You know, what are you going to do about it? >> Well, you're in the wrong line. Yeah,
00:26:12
but what are you going to do about it? >> That's that's a better one. But what are
00:26:16
you going to do about I'm do nothing. What are you going to do about it? >> Why are we talking? So why are we even
00:26:20
wasting time? Because you know you're know you're going to do nothing. >> I do love it.
00:26:23
>> Yeah. So that's the new catchphrase. You can use it at home with your friends.
00:26:27
Try not to get in trouble with it. But it's kind of a fun thing if you in a positive sort of strong posture in life
00:26:34
>> because Tyson, he hasn't fought for what, 20 years. And everyone knows that
00:26:39
that guy could kill me >> in two seconds. >> Yeah. I he was the first
00:26:46
heavyweight boxer, you know, champion that I met and then shook his hand and it was like it
00:26:56
was like just it weighed about 60 lbs. I go, "Your hand is so heavy." He goes,
00:27:02
"Yeah, what are you going to do about it?" >> Yeah, exactly. What are you
00:27:05
>> Well, no, I'm just saying it's a very heavy hand. I know, but what are you
00:27:08
going to do about it? >> You always say, "What are you going to do about it?"
00:27:10
>> He said, "What are you going to do about it?" I go, "Nothing. Nothing, Mike. I
00:27:13
No, you It's perfectly great. Sure. I uh you know, no, it's a terrific hand. It's
00:27:18
just But uh the point is that >> brittle bones. >> One punch. You would not be happy.
00:27:25
>> All right, let's show you a video I saw on Instagram. You know, when we uh
00:27:28
sometimes they pull sound from movies. This is funny sound. Tell me who these people are.
00:27:33
>> Mark Zuckerberg. >> We got to go to Milan. >> Milan? What? Italy. What's in Milan?
00:27:39
Was that your voice? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Funny. >> Isn't that funny?
00:27:44
>> Well, did someone do that or >> There's a Tik Tok trend that I didn't
00:27:47
even recognize my own voice where they go, "This is you." And it's people and
00:27:51
that other part. Play it again. Is it too late? The other part's Sandler. This part
00:27:58
>> we got to go to Milan. >> That doesn't even sound like >> What's in Milan?
00:28:03
>> It's Grown-Ups. Yeah, it's from >> Oh, okay. So they took those from
00:28:06
>> there's a scene in Grown-Ups where we're at uh Woodman's and uh Sandler's
00:28:10
embarrassed cuz Salah's wife says, "You can't hang out with these guys next
00:28:13
week." >> Yeah. >> You know what we're doing? And I go, "Why? What are you doing?" He goes,
00:28:17
>> "We got to go to Milan." I go, "Melan, what? Italy? What's in Milan?" And then
00:28:21
he goes, "Fashion show." And we're all like, "No way, dude. You're leaving?"
00:28:26
And he's like, "Yeah, but I think it's funny. They pull it for that." And then
00:28:30
everyone does the same thing. They pan >> to these all these places in Italy.
00:28:34
So, it's sort of a slice of life. Grown-ups is trundling around in the culture. I think I'm going on out on a
00:28:41
limb, but maybe you guys should make a third one. >> I think people I think there's what they
00:28:45
call demand in the marketplace for that. >> Yes, TBS channel is asking. They go, we
00:28:50
need that thing. >> Does TBS still exist? >> I think we're keeping the lights on over
00:28:55
there with grown-ups and Joe Dirt and Benchwarmers. Oh, Blended is on Blended of all movies.
00:29:01
>> Blended every day. Huh? >> Oh [ __ ] Uh, >> okay. >> I'm going to see Chris Rock cuz we're
00:29:09
meeting in Milan this summer. He's going to take me on a boat. He said, >> "Really?"
00:29:14
>> Yeah. >> So, that was arranged last night. You're going to go to Milan and go on a boat
00:29:18
with him. >> It's not a big talk. Yeah. I I'll go. Huh? >> What are you going to do about it?
00:29:24
>> I already worked it in. Uh, all right. Let's see. >> What are you gonna do about it?
00:29:28
>> Yeah. Well, no. I'm just saying you're in the wrong light. >> Okay. Hold on. Hold on. Don't push the
00:29:32
action yet. I don't know what this is. Let's play it. We'll figure it out.
00:29:36
>> All right, we can see it. >> This is how F1 drivers reacted to my
00:29:38
really high back flips. >> I have one of the highest standing back flips. >> That is that real? That's a really high.
00:29:43
>> Rate it 1 through 10. >> Holy [ __ ] >> That's insane. >> Like,
00:29:49
>> well, they're kind of shorter anyway. F1 drivers. >> How did you even tell the viewers, but
00:29:53
it's because I'm black. >> What are you going to do about standing
00:29:58
back? Okay, I'm ready when you are. It's definitely higher than I picture it.
00:30:03
>> Well, he's got a big vertical and then he pulls his legs way up. He's got that
00:30:08
vertical >> really high back flip. I want to have you. Okay. >> All right. Just stay right there. No,
00:30:12
you can come closer. You don't got to sit back. You come closer. >> This guy's tall as [ __ ] too. Seems like
00:30:16
it. >> Two. >> One. >> Holy. >> It's really easy for him.
00:30:22
>> It's so easy. >> Now, Dana, you know my neck hurts cuz I did a back flip and I landed short. Is
00:30:28
that Is that what happened? Get rid of that. >> It was an injury. That's how it
00:30:31
happened. I didn't know that. I was doing back flips for a uh show in high school, like a talent show, and I was on
00:30:37
the hardwood, and that day I was with my buddy uh Dan, I think, and I go, "Hey."
00:30:42
>> Yeah. >> We at the pool, and I go, I got to do a standing back tonight. So, I was also in
00:30:46
gymnastics. A lot of red flags here. Uh in gymnastics. Hey. And we were doing a dance number that night. Uh oh. Uh oh,
00:30:53
ladies. And so I go in the daytime and I was in the pool and I was barefoot and I go in
00:30:58
the grass and I go, "Hey, let me practice one before tonight because we have to do at the end of this thing.
00:31:03
>> We're doing sketches and stuff." >> So I do it and he flips me around. I go,
00:31:06
"What happened?" He goes, "You weren't going to make it." I go,
00:31:08
>> "No, no, no. I I I can do these. I got to do it tonight." So that night I went
00:31:13
in and I uh was backstage and the crowd is coming in and I go to the other guy. It's pitch black back there. I go, "Hey,
00:31:19
uh, on that black hardwood, I go, "Hey, flip me around." I go, I'm gonna do back
00:31:25
flip. And he flips me around. And then I go, okay, don't spot me on this one. He
00:31:29
goes, okay. And I went and I came out short and missed my feet and land on my face and I bounced off my head and I go
00:31:36
and he goes, "Are you right?" And I go, "Not at all." And I walked away and this
00:31:40
tooth was loose and it was pouring blood and my nose is pouring blood and I had black paint on my teeth in the stage. So
00:31:46
I got backstage and they called my mom out and a doctor from the back. And is there a doctor in the house? For real?
00:31:52
>> Wow. And he goes, he goes, he's a little rattled. I mean, by the way, this is I
00:31:58
had a I didn't know who anyone was for an hour. >> Use this to illustrate it. Like you're
00:32:03
you go okay, you go up. Yeah. >> Okay. Let me see. I mean, I'm standing
00:32:07
there like that. >> And you're supposed to go up and land like that. >> Yeah. Full rotation
00:32:11
>> and land short. You go wham. >> But wouldn't you be on your back?
00:32:14
>> No. You're coming on your feet. >> Okay. These feet show up. >> Yeah. And so I just basically did a back
00:32:20
dive and all the weight went on my face. >> Okay, here's your face. All right, buddy. And then Hey, buddy.
00:32:32
>> Yeah, it didn't go far enough. >> Like I put my feet out, but they
00:32:35
>> My feet need to go all the way around like that. >> It is hard to explain.
00:32:38
>> And you went I know you went, "Hey buddy, I got this. How >> bad I could [ __ ] this up. It's hard to
00:32:42
expl." And bam. You didn't rotate in. So you didn't get enough lift. So it
00:32:48
cracked my and and my jaw and so >> Well, you could have been paralyzed. >> Yeah, cuz it was, you know, I see these
00:32:54
fails on TV. It's like, haha, another fail. They go and I'm like, each one of
00:32:59
those I go, >> that guy's [ __ ] for years. Because some of the So anyway, I'm backstage.
00:33:05
>> I don't know who anyone is for a full hour, right? >> They should have choppered me out,
00:33:09
everyone on one knee. But instead, I'm just backstage staring. And then my mom's, I don't know who she is. Doctor's
00:33:15
like, "He's a little shook up and he's rattled." All these old It's like, "Oh,
00:33:18
all those little things. He's a little banged up." >> And my They go, "Get but we don't have
00:33:23
insurance, you so get him to the hospital." And she's like, "Oh my god,
00:33:27
right away." And then my mom's like, "Davey, do you want to go to the
00:33:30
hospital or Pizza Hut?" So, I stayed I got my memory back about halfway through
00:33:36
the show, went out and did a couple of my numbers and then afterwards we went to the after part. I never got it looked
00:33:43
at and it started to get worse and then I got out of high school and got to uh >> started to do stand up and then the
00:33:50
stress combined with the never fixing it. The neck and jaw was just [ __ ] up. And to this day, that's why it's still
00:33:56
>> Did you ever get a, you know, MRI to see >> I've had every >> Well, what happened? Are there muscles
00:34:03
are now kind of damaged? >> Everything's like smashed down and uh >> it's the muscles are the most pain. So
00:34:09
muscles are tough because any muscle relaxing and knocks you out, you know? So, >> right,
00:34:13
>> obvious it's really the guys like just you're so [ __ ] tough as [ __ ] man.
00:34:17
It's like unreal. >> Well, huh. >> Pizza was good. How? And the floor was
00:34:23
okay. I thought you'd ask about the floor. The floor was fine. >> Yeah, I had a neck thing. That was fun.
00:34:28
But what was Pizza Hut like? >> Pizza Hut. I think it was more shakies, but uh they have a salad bar. That's why
00:34:35
I like all these old trashy places. Like >> closest I came to that was that and I've
00:34:39
told it before, but I was doing um a flip on Saturday Night Live, >> SNL. >> SNL on Friday pre-tape.
00:34:47
I was playing Vice President Dan Quail as if he was Dick Van Djk in the old Dick Van Djk show. And in that thing for
00:34:54
you boomers, he goes and there's an Ottoman and he does a flip over it. >> Fake trip. It flips.
00:35:00
>> Yeah. Straight. And >> it's hard to It's hard to do it right.
00:35:03
>> Right. And I don't think there was no stunt coordinator there. There was just
00:35:07
the ottoman and it might have been teeny carpet or something like that. There wasn't like a soft landing kind of
00:35:13
thing. >> Oh yeah. So the first time I did it like, oh, I didn't fully rotate and I
00:35:18
landed here. There's a bump here. And then I was just stupid. I kept doing it,
00:35:24
>> of course. >> So then it's completely separated. Grade three. I found out later I'm walking
00:35:29
around 8H like this and Mary Tyler Moore's husband is there who's a doctor.
00:35:34
He goes, "Hey, come here. I think you got something." >> Oh. So he says, and yeah, yeah, the
00:35:38
husband said, "Whoa, I'm going to have to call the doctor." So I said, "All
00:35:45
right." So they checked me out and they said, "It's probably non-surgical." So
00:35:48
the next night I had to do the show with all the quick changes. >> Mhm. Anyway, that's my story.
00:35:54
>> No, I'm not even joking. That still hurts. >> After that on Schiller Vision, my neck
00:35:57
was already [ __ ] at SNL and uh and I'm so thirsty to be in the show >> short film.
00:36:02
>> Tom Schiller says, "You want to be in this short film that no one will see or
00:36:05
care about?" I go, "Yep." So, I go to the park by the water over there on the
00:36:10
west end with Victoria. We're playing old people >> and we live our whole life and then a
00:36:14
bomb drops on us. So, >> they're on a ladder about 10 feet above me and keep dropping this bomb and hits
00:36:20
me in the head and I fall down >> and it jams my neck so bad. I go, "Oh,
00:36:24
it kind of hurt." He goes, "Okay, well, let's get it again." I probably did it
00:36:26
seven times >> and it jammed my spine every time. It should have been illegal. We needed at
00:36:31
least an intimacy coordinator on there. Um because I was getting [ __ ] on the deal.
00:36:36
>> Why? After Okay. You do it three times. Ah. When did you think to say I'm not
00:36:41
gonna do it? And he would say you'd have to do it. And then you would say what
00:36:45
are you going to do about it? I'm not going to do anymore. >> Because I don't want the word get back
00:36:50
to Lauren that I didn't got. >> And I didn't want to be in this dog [ __ ]
00:36:53
threeminute that was played at 5 to one. >> So I remember going to and I was trying
00:36:58
to think of who I could go to. I went to acupuncture and we have no time. No. So
00:37:03
there's no time except a Sunday to go to any doctor and I have my scrape pennies
00:37:07
I make on the show. >> Uh other than that, all right, let's go to another video. This has been sad sad
00:37:15
feelood story of the year. >> I [ __ ] ding that. >> Can we edit that and bring it on the top
00:37:19
of the show? >> When I go like this, I go he goes do I go I don't want to do it again. What are
00:37:23
you going to do about it? He goes beat the [ __ ] out of you. And I go that backfired.
00:37:28
>> Yeah, you got to be menacing with that. So they >> Oh, this is interesting. Danny, you
00:37:32
might think this is interesting. >> Maybe. >> In 19 Can I read this? This is the big
00:37:36
part. In 1965, >> archaeologist in Peru unearthed ceramic jaguar vessel when they poured water in
00:37:46
it, it roared 2,000 years ago. >> Incas did something. >> Modern engineers can't precisely
00:37:53
reproduce. That I love old things that you go, are there aliens? Where did these come from?
00:37:58
So, they make these so precise that when they pour them, they whistle a different
00:38:02
whistle. Let's see it. >> Isn't that cool? >> Isn't that cool?
00:38:15
>> How old were the When were >> When did they make those, >> dude? 2,000 years ago. When you're
00:38:21
>> Well, I think it's clever, but imagine how much free time they had. I mean I
00:38:24
mean it's like >> there was no distractions at all. >> They had they had lots of time.
00:38:31
>> Well, what happened was in in very olden times humans would eat snails and snakes
00:38:36
and anything they could and we were incredibly healthy. >> Then then we the uh agricultural
00:38:42
revolution came in wheat. So, we're just eating wheat, but it was enough to we
00:38:47
could put it in a silo and then feed guys to think of how to make weapons because usually everyone's hunting and
00:38:53
gathering. They had no time to make a weapon. Finally, that had guy's eating
00:38:56
tons of wheat and they're going, "Hey, what about this?" And then the whistle
00:39:00
workers were right next to them. >> I got I make a bird whistle high. Make a
00:39:08
turtle. >> That's a good location back then. This is a Mayan accent from 1218 from
00:39:14
Emperor's New Group. >> I can't believe I nailed it. I don't know. You know,
00:39:17
>> you nailed it. >> You know, I heard during like the Civil War and there Wars, all they had was
00:39:21
Luna Bars to eat. >> They just had protein bars. No real food around. >> Well, in World War II, they call it
00:39:28
heart attack, I think. >> Yeah. World War II. Then they had like those neutrorain ones.
00:39:34
>> Yeah. In the straighter hormuse on the ships, they have suzie cues. those little
00:39:39
>> straight her moose. >> What is it with Trump or or Biden? >> No, it's the old actor.
00:39:46
>> Oh, Kirk Douglas up on in in the movie. >> Why is this funny? >> He's like, I'm going to call it the
00:39:52
straight of Hamoose. Excuse me. I told you and I want to tell you again. From now on, this body of
00:40:02
water is going to be called, wait for it, the straight of Hamoose. What do you think, Bert? I think it's a
00:40:10
fine night of home. >> [ __ ] we've gone this long already. >> Straight to homes.
00:40:14
>> All right, let's do another story. >> This is for the 90 year olds watching.
00:40:19
>> I know. We We've been [ __ ] yapping, dude. >> Okay. Oh, this is our second hour.
00:40:24
>> Oh, Heather, this is one I said is like you when you get news. So, he's giving
00:40:28
his fiance Come over here and look >> here. Pause it for a second. >> Surprising my fiance with a puppy after
00:40:35
two years of begging. She does a classic Heather thing. >> Just open the gift.
00:40:42
>> Is it a joke? >> I'm scared. >> Just open. >> She thinks so.
00:40:51
>> I swear. >> No, it's not. >> Look at this. >> I'm going to pass it out.
00:40:59
>> It's going to be a snake or something. No, it's a little puppy. It's cute. Oh,
00:41:02
she's overwhelmed with joy. She's so excited. A sweet, >> it's too much. Isn't it cute? Look at
00:41:10
the puppy's. So cute, too. Hey, mom. >> She can't even deal with it.
00:41:17
>> Jeez. I'm so glad she got a puppy. >> I know. Me, too. I wish I I get a puppy
00:41:22
for everyone here. >> That is life. Like, everything's straightened out.
00:41:29
>> I need something cold. >> You can't breathe. You got to do it.
00:41:33
>> Look at that little puppy. Hey, see that's the feeling one. >> All right, that's enough. It's
00:41:39
>> Did you see the sequel? There's one like goes two weeks later and there's puppy
00:41:43
[ __ ] all over the rug and she goes, "You clean it up." >> And the puppy's like, "Oh, mama."
00:41:49
I've been holding that one in in the box. >> Okay. Um, how many different raspberries
00:41:54
do you have? >> Okay. What's this? Let's see. This is >> That's us from last night's show.
00:42:04
Oh, he's skateboarding king to Batswana. You know what a good crowd, >> dude. Let's bring that crowd on the road
00:42:16
with us. >> Wow. >> That was us last night with Chris Rock. Look at how great they are. They're so
00:42:22
excited to do one skateboard trick. They think it's magic. It's >> I love it. How did When is the age where
00:42:29
you kind of lose that kind of unbridled joy over time with ice cream? I can't
00:42:35
believe it. >> Dude, I saw a guy doing he's like a magician. He had like a puppet.
00:42:39
>> Mhm. >> And every time he turned around, he's got like a bunch of like, you know,
00:42:42
six-year-olds and he goes, "I can't feed the puppy yet. Let me see what else I
00:42:46
have." And the puppy bites it. AND THEY ALL GO BECAUSE THEY CAN'T believe the
00:42:49
puppy ate, you know, the fake. They scream and laugh so hard. And he goes, "Whoa, what happened?" And they're like,
00:42:56
even >> the dog he ate it. It's so funny. >> I know. >> Yeah, that's the best time. And then
00:43:00
everyone, you know, who needs him? >> I'd say, you know, 20 to 25 before life
00:43:05
gets you by the scruff of the neck. >> Laugh a lot. >> By the short and curies.
00:43:11
>> I don't know. What are you talking about? >> They used to say that when people had
00:43:14
short curies. Now they don't. >> Okay, let me just take a sip. >> Hey, man. When the going gets tough, the
00:43:20
tough get going. These are uh winners find a way to win. Losers find a way to lose. These are high school cross
00:43:27
country posters. Um, and what which one would you have been? Going gets tough, the tough get
00:43:33
going. Winners find a way to win. Losers find a way to lose. >> Um, I I had ass, gas, or grass. Nobody rides
00:43:42
for free. >> Is that was that >> That's when you're trying to give a girl
00:43:46
a ride. >> Phoenix Junior High or something. >> Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I No. At
00:43:51
Mojave Elementary. Uh, masked mannequin scares car burglars, which Oh, leads to a shooting. This might not be as fun as
00:43:58
the other. >> Oh, I love these. It's perfect. Right after the puppy. Wow.
00:44:05
What's going on? He gets broken into constantly, like all the time. So, u I was just kind of
00:44:16
getting tired of it, but it backfired obviously. Oh, he put a fake Oh, he put a fake mannequin in his car to deter
00:44:23
people and then they like a scarecrow for thieves instead of just walking away. They just many times.
00:44:29
>> Oh, that's what happens. >> There like that's terrifying.
00:44:32
>> They would they would >> What if he was just sitting in there bullets that went through the back of
00:44:35
the seat? >> They thought he goes I'll just put a mannequin. I'm getting robbed too much.
00:44:39
They'll think someone's home. And then they just gunn down the mannequin.
00:44:42
>> And they just kill the mannequin. >> And he's like goes that supposed to
00:44:45
deter them. It kind of backfired. >> Yeah, it didn't. It seemed to increase
00:44:49
the uh amount of violence they unloaded. >> Yeah, cuz the mannequin goes, "What are
00:44:54
you going to do about it?" And they shot him. >> Okay. Six. What are you going to do
00:44:58
about it? Okay. Let him shoot the plastic man. As long as the earth for so long, almost an hour. Is that
00:45:04
true? >> This podcast is so good. >> People were listening going, "You could
00:45:09
have lpped off 20 minutes and we wouldn't even notice. >> I was not funny at the beginning." I'm
00:45:14
getting there. These are at the comments or for this episode. >> Yeah, >> this is my comment.
00:45:20
>> Shut up, Danny. They're in person now. They're in the same room. No, they're
00:45:23
not. They always do it over Zoom. Shut up, Danny. They're in >> Everyone's going to be like, "Run in
00:45:28
here. Look at YouTube. They're in the same room. Run in here." >> Yeah.
00:45:32
>> But they can't look at each other. They're kind of tilted. Their necks are
00:45:34
a little stiff. >> We're both >> You've watched the show too much, Danny.
00:45:40
>> The har virus. Yeah. >> Transmitted over saliva or >> No, I'm scared of the haunt virus. Haunt
00:45:49
virus. >> Is that the rat virus? >> The rat one that they said today is
00:45:52
taking over and the new corona >> and I'm scared to death. >> I won't be able to go to Milan.
00:45:59
>> So, what does that say? The people who got it, what did they do? >> They went.
00:46:04
>> No, but they're saying they're going to maybe stop people from traveling. This
00:46:07
is the beginning. This is the beginning. >> Uhoh. mean a lockdown on cruise ships.
00:46:12
>> Yep. >> You heard it here. I heard on three different newses this morning. I go,
00:46:17
"Shut the f up. You cannot." >> Well, this will be all the patrol cards,
00:46:21
the government officials, and the Apache helicopters. We are a cur. The princess,
00:46:25
USS Princess is officially quarantined. Please leave the boat. No. There's one
00:46:30
man right at the gang place. Sir, >> sir, please get out of the way so we can
00:46:34
board this boat. We are taking control of it. >> No, they're off it. What? What are you
00:46:39
going to do about it? >> Oh, all that for that. >> Oh, yeah. The Cuz I wanted it to be a
00:46:44
surprise. >> It was That's not I interrupted. >> No, but I mean, what are you going to do
00:46:49
about it? What are you going to do? >> Is that Is that the Haunt Virus talking
00:46:52
or is that the person? No, >> that was >> Here's the Haunts up because I'm here to kill you. Go,
00:46:58
what are you going to do about it? >> Yeah, the Hunter virus learned to do an
00:47:01
impression of of Tyson and it scares everyone. I >> scares the vaccine. >> Hey, I don't want to I don't want you
00:47:06
inside my body. Ha virus. Yeah. What are you gonna do about it? I'm I'm just
00:47:09
getting in there. What are you gonna do? Exactly. >> You're gonna get a fever, you know.
00:47:12
Well, I don't want that. I get away. What are you gonna do about it, though?
00:47:16
>> See, >> this is the theme. >> This is the theme of the show.
00:47:18
>> This should be on the YouTube. What are you going to do about it? >> Do it.
00:47:21
>> If I get a hold of a rhythm, it's like a song in my head and I can't stop. And
00:47:25
I'm sorry. >> Next week I'll have something else. But this is the what are you gonna do about
00:47:30
a week because I just love that. >> I wonder if by Monday when this is on,
00:47:34
everyone will be talking about the haunt haunted virus or whatever it's called.
00:47:37
haunt virus and they said they're tracing people's because they got off the boat now where did they go where did
00:47:43
they come from now they're starting to do that again the beginnings of like we
00:47:47
got to find out where people were stop them from going somewhere else maybe slow down on travel and I'm like no no
00:47:53
no no >> let me please help me understand like who wants to go on a large >> giant sweaty with all these people the
00:48:01
toilets don't really work everyone's drunk people are falling over and then
00:48:05
there's tidal waves Someone always dies. Every story, Daily Mail, once a week,
00:48:09
someone dies every time. >> What about this? Good news. I saw this morning. Madna
00:48:15
already haunt the virus vaccine. >> Oh boy. >> Do not. Yes. To the rescue.
00:48:24
>> Going to make a little stock by >> Yeah. >> M O D E R N A. Okay. Good.
00:48:31
>> Um, that's what I heard. I'm just telling you what I heard. >> Undisclosed amount. I guess we should
00:48:36
wrap up. We have Let's do another Let's do one more. >> Thanks for Oh, good.
00:48:40
>> Why not? >> Oh, this kid. I like this cuz this kid can recreate a logo with a with a
00:48:49
>> What about uh >> Kleenex was good, right? >> Clorox. >> Oh, so he's memorized the the font and
00:48:56
everything, right? That looks good. You can't see it, Heather, can you? >> Dude, that looks just like it.
00:49:00
>> What about Fabreze? >> Fabreze. He's Why did you sound like you're mad?
00:49:06
>> I'm not >> for breeze. >> Campbell. >> Campbell. >> I mean, this kid's pretty gifted if he
00:49:12
can recreate. >> This is cool. I like this. >> Dang. >> I can't think of any.
00:49:19
>> Walt Disney. >> Big big. Yeah, there you go. Oh, the circle. Oh, the S, too. Good job, kid.
00:49:27
And he's also working in this >> and he's in a tight in a limited square.
00:49:32
>> Yeah. What about? >> Give him one more. >> Cadberry. >> [ __ ] Cadberry.
00:49:37
>> He never stops. He really gives it a gripper. >> Got some Crocs on. He's chilling.
00:49:46
>> He's uncomfortable now. >> That was pretty good though. >> That was cute.
00:49:49
>> Yeah, we've had some cuties today. >> Mhm. >> Yeah, >> except the haunted virus. Wait, what was
00:49:56
the next one? That sounded [ __ ] rough. >> Finish. I don't even know what dance to
00:50:02
fake asylum seekers not to abuse European women. It seems like a joke, but it's not.
00:50:08
>> Wait, let's see it now. It's too late. >> My no place, Heather.
00:50:17
>> Oh, there. >> Can you see him dancing? It's so hysterical. >> Now, is that one more time for Heather
00:50:28
or is that real? This is real. Is it squared on there? I never look and the lights are off.
00:50:43
>> Well, I'm sorry. >> She goes square and I'm like, are they?
00:50:46
>> They're singing this to this guy and the guy goes, you know, what are you going
00:50:49
to do about Sorry, you set me up, right? That's a good wrap up. That was intentional, right? It had to be because
00:50:54
that was the ultimate >> That was a good wrap-up. >> No. What What are you going to do about
00:50:57
it? Um, it's uh, >> well, this has been sort of the show >> and we did a pretty good job. It had
00:51:04
some dead spots on my end. >> D is always bringing it, but uh, >> uh, I I I don't I just felt silly. I
00:51:10
felt a little uh, >> summarizing spacey from the whole whoop-doo yesterday two-hour drive to
00:51:17
the gig downtown. >> I'm going to this Netflix brunch. >> Yes. >> I'm going to go with Nikki.
00:51:24
>> Mhm. And daytime parties are a little odd for me because I'm a little bit of a
00:51:28
recluse. And so I'm a little bit >> a little bit of a prude. I'm a little
00:51:35
shy in crowds. >> So, but once I see that buffet, >> you're a wallflower.
00:51:41
>> Yeah. So, I'm going to do that and then you're going to drive back after you
00:51:45
>> go. >> I'm going to go get a little adjustment. I will be sitting different.
00:51:50
>> Um, probably in 10 days, I will get sort of a haircut. I want people I don't know
00:51:55
if you have your calendars out or if you just >> alert. >> Um, >> got it.
00:52:00
>> And uh, other than that, I'm gonna go to New York and then I'm going to go to
00:52:07
Miami. >> Then you're coming back here cuz we're doing one in person.
00:52:11
>> Yeah. Then coming back here for our friend Brendan Frasier, ladies and gentlemen. And you will be going to
00:52:18
brunches and parties, >> clicking my heels around here, going to the grove,
00:52:22
>> doing laps around your house, >> worrying about the haunt virus. >> Haunt who virus? What?
00:52:27
>> Punching rats in the stomach. >> Is it from rats? >> We had a rat infestation at our house
00:52:34
once. >> Is it from your farm? >> No. No, it was another house, David.
00:52:39
>> What if they trace it back to your farm? But here's the thing. They go, "Oh,
00:52:42
don't be afraid." And they all show up in hazmat suits. They're all just like
00:52:46
down. We're coming up, you know. >> And then >> we catch rats. They're like a foot long.
00:52:53
You're like, you have to go down. They they've been smashed by the trap and you
00:52:57
got to handle them tight. I was allergic to this story. That's all that's all my rat story. I
00:53:05
don't really I like I'm not a rat guy. I mean, I knew a guy had a pet rat and
00:53:10
loved his pet rat. I just don't I don't get it. Did you notice that my leg is
00:53:15
showing more as the episode went on? >> Yeah, people are already lighting up the
00:53:18
comments. >> I got to get a 32 inseam or something to cover up cuz >> Are you growing out of your pants?
00:53:24
>> Well, my legs have gotten a little longer recently. I don't know what it
00:53:27
is. It's some kind of hot virus side effect. Make a stop. >> Inhalation of virus particles from
00:53:34
infected rodent urine droppings or saliva is how it spreads. >> I'm not eating any more rat poop. You
00:53:41
know what? At least for a while. >> That's anti that's anti-ro man. I'm not
00:53:46
comfortable with that kind of thinking. Like the bad guy. >> Yeah. They're not the bad guy.
00:53:50
>> I think that's prejuditial in a sense. >> Blame it on the rat.
00:53:54
>> That's an easy one to blame it on. >> Yeah. >> Everyone hates rats. All right. Thanks
00:53:58
for coming, guys. Thanks for being here. Next week, we'll see you again on another edition ofoop.
00:54:09
Hey guys, if you're loving this podcast, which you are, be sure to click follow
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00:54:25
>> Fly on the Wall presented by Odyssey, an executive produced by Dana Carvey and
00:54:29
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00:54:36
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00:54:43
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00:54:51
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