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All right, we got our boy Chris Rock, who is Chris Rock, very good friend and um
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great guy, a great guy and one of the funniest guys out there in real life on phone calls on
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uh and on stage obviously. He did that special um where he finally talked about the Will Smith situation. I was and we helped live. We were live after after
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his I think it was the biggest whatever the highest numbers or something. Yeah, they did one that was the first live show. Yeah, live and it was global. But um that was amazing.
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We've talked to Chris about everything. We cover the gamut. We just laugh basically. The sound's a little itchy
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because it was one of the first ones we ever did, but it's still fine. He's he's always very interesting to
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talk to and he he he kind of opened up toward the end and talks about his this apartment that he got and it was sort of
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the one of the first times he's ever sort of bought something for himself or something like that. But we get into his
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childhood and all kinds of stuff. It's very very interesting and it's always funny with Chris Rock. Always lots of laughs. Here he is. Chris
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Rock. Rock said I could stay there. Hang on, Dana. I wet the bed and so I said I shouldn't stay at his house because I'd feel embarrassed. You still wet the bed. I was a bed
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wetter. There's no way to get out of a wet bed with any dignity. What happened, dear? But anyway, that's We'll get to the childhood stuff in a minute. But Chris, on your a day off for
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you, not a family day, but a Chris day. Like it's going to be totally off. No emails. You're going to have fun. Does
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that great Chris Day include having to go on a podcast? Because you know you're you're performing. I love the lady, but I really love Spain. I know.
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Yeah. So, you had to do it. Rock and I came in together. Yeah. Thank you, Rock. Um, you know,
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almost anything for Dana, but anything. No, but you guys were the junior varsity who who outdid the varsity. But we had a
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junior varsity team consisting of Farley, you Sandler, Schneider, and and David. I mean, it was an incredible junior varsity team that
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was being trained to take over when we left in a way, right? No, it was uh Yeah. And it's amazing that
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Yeah. Farley, like Kobe Bryant, came off the bench. People forget. Yeah. Oh, yeah. We do a whole show. We
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go, "Hey, how about this guy Farley? was just I don't even know why they hired us because normally they bring in the new
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people when the old people are you know you know not not doing great. You guys were in
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rare form. I mean that was you know that was the beginning of a 18 20 person cast. When I came in
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it was like basically four feature players or there were six total and that was the beginning and now there's like
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21. So it never went back to just five people being the cast right after that. No, I don't think Yeah, I went the other night and I I couldn't believe how long
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the the credit roll was like Jimmy Roers in the on SNL like I couldn't believe it's like how many people are in this cast? We started it was just so people know it
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I I came on the end four shows of the previous season. So Rob Schneider and I got hired to write for four episodes on those four. Dice Clay was the host. We had a couple
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good ones, you know, Alec Baldwin's first show and then when the summer came, we we got picked up and then that's when Rock and Barley
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came. Right, Rock? Were you a full cast or were you a feature player? Me and Yeah. Me and Farley got brought on together. We were the new guys that
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year. Yeah. So, we were also new together. Yeah. So, we got close offices and we uh
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Rock was who people don't know because he's tough on TV. So am I. I've come off like a hard ass athlete.
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But Rock was is a nice person. And I was sort of an out of my element from Arizona. And we gravitated just because
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we were kind of in over our heads like everyone is there. I guess when they Yeah. I mean, well, you know, they
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always had that thing. It was the standups and the improv guys. Yeah. Yeah. And the improv guys were more
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technically prepared for the show. But the standup guys, because we write our own material and we live and die by the crowd, we were more, I thought, mentally
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prepared for the show. Like because the show Yeah. The show it killed or it didn't kill. Yeah. Like
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we could, you know what I mean? Like the standups I thought were less into the politics of who likes who and who's close with Downey and who's close with
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Lauren. It's like improv guys because they're thinking they're they in a group think and stand like Sandler to come from writing on the show and
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this by force of nature make himself you know the biggest cast member only a standup could do some crazy [ __ ] like that. Yeah I think I got on I caught on to
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Sandler. We always thought he's funny, but Chris Dana, you we all know great comedians that never pop or never make
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it. And I'm like, I watch a guy go, "This guy's better than me and I probably make more." You know what I mean? They just they don't get
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discovered. And when you see Sandler, I think it was somewhere around Crazy Spoon Head where I'm like, "This [ __ ]
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guy does not run out of ideas. He does not stop and he just [ __ ] crushes. It's it's every week it was a new one.
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I'm like, god damn, this guy's got it." He would he would crawl around on all fours down the hallway. I'd be in my
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office and I'd hear a little knock and he would come in so gently and so quietly. But he wanted me to introduce
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Opera Man cuz he'd done it once and they didn't what you know. So that I from update somehow I introduced it and it was separate and he had a little stage and that was the beginning. But when I
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first saw Sandler, his likability and charm, let's just talk about him for a sec. He'll hate if he
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just sitting in a chair and leaning back. Hey, it was like, whoa. You know, and the the girls liked him. Let's face
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it. And then he's Adam Sandler. But I He's the original Pete Davidson. He was Yeah, Pete Davidson. Great comic, but I am fascinated by who he has sex with. I
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mean, that's a big part of my life following that thing. Rock, I have a question about when you did your first when your first
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Do you have like questions prepared? Did you guys actually Yeah, we care about you. My goal was for you not to be bored.
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Like, so you got on SNL and then bring the pain really blew up, right? Oh my god.
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You know what I mean? So, I have questions for you that I'm actually curious like as if we were hanging out.
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Yeah. But if you want us to ask about anything, let let us know. I'll answer anything you want.
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I'm curious about if rock felt if it was not fair, but I I did one weekend update
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in my first four shows and it scared the [ __ ] out of me. We all weren't really actors. We hadn't done much. So Rock's
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first show, they were so salivating over Rock to come in and do all these sketches they couldn't do that I remember I think they overloaded you with so many because there was a
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Confederate sketch especially. deaths. I long as I got SNL hadn't had a black cast member like nine years. Most people think I'm the black guy after Eddie. I'm
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actually the black guy after Damon Williams. And and Living Color was killing it at
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this point. And there was like a bunch of whatever SNL so white articles or whatever. And then I got hired. So yeah, there was like this immediate
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thing where like you're going to do some Eddie Murphy stuff, right? Like I I don't do any impressions.
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They brush off all the old lot of pressure, you know, the Eddie Murphy type stuff. Any impressions? I don't do any voices,
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you know what I mean? Like I do what I do. I mean, you know, but uh so yeah, I guess there was pressure.
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You have to do act and you have to look at Q cards. And you know, just being in one sketch, you're terrified all week or
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I was. And you have to inch your way in and you were like hosting that first time because I remember you were in a
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lot of sketches. They're pulling you every which way. You have a million costume changes. And the scariest one was I was a soldier in the Confederate
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soldier. I don't know what the sketch was. You were the first black general. Franken wrote it.
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Franken. And he was [ __ ] roughing. No one should have to work with Franken the first year on the show. Never.
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That's what I was getting at is he's so tough now. What are you doing? It's like, okay, you've been on two
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years now. You can work without breaking. God damn. He was intimidating. He's great. He's He's amazing guy, but
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you know, he's a little intimidating. He because he doesn't he's very blunt. That wasn't
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very funny. You know, you have to get used to that. He's the white Lasset Jr. from Officer
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Hill. Like, what you going to do? Mayonnaise? Was it that record? I remember that sketch. I was like gossip rock. But was it weird because if I
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didn't really think about it that way, but in living Keller is is doing great. You must feel like you're almost stuck
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on SNL because it's like [ __ ] I should be. I did. I I mean, I loved it and I loved
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you guys, but it was a weird, you know, I'm sure Jackie Robinson used to like go
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to Harlem after the [ __ ] games with with the Dodgers and [ __ ] It's like, right, shit's happening uptown. Why am I here with Pee-Wee Reese? But
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Peewee Reese, good reference. When you went on In Living Color, you finally went on there. Did you Were you
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uh Was it fun or was it not fun at that point? No, when I finally got there, the Waynees were gone, Kenan was gone. I was
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like, I didn't know that. I don't even know what the hell I was on. I was on, but it was weird. I got to work with Jim
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Carrey and Jamie Fox was there. Um, you know, all of that SNL and Living Color, it was just for me to make friends and to kind of learn about writing and writing on a deadline, all
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of that was just training. And, you know, I I was supposed to do standup. Thank God. Yeah. It it's a humbling boot camp that just reminds you that everyone got there
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because they were good and then you're immediately [ __ ] on and you're immed. It's like a wakeup call like oh [ __ ]
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I'm not the first guy to like maybe you know the show wasn't perfect for me but you know Julia Louise Drifus Stiller you know
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it's like a lot of people that kind of you know Jim Carrey I auditioned with Jim Carrey
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you know I mean and I thought well they got to pick Jim Carrey guy's insane but he killed on in Living Color
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I auditioned the night I auditioned night me and Sam were auditioned we're at at the Chicago Improv and uh Dana
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Ghoul was so good. Know him well. I left the audition. Yeah. Guy. Yeah. I I like I was like, "Okay, this is over. This guy
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smart, funny, smart, funny, like y whatever." Like this guy's so much better than me. I am out of my league. And I left. And later that night,
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Lauren, you know, whatever, found out what hotel I was in and told me to come downstairs and basically told me I had
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to show. I didn't even like that's how good Dana Ghoul was. Like, let me get the [ __ ] out of here because I'm wasting
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my time. I think with Lauren, it's it's it's um it's like almost a sports analogy or
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something. He's looking at people can play well together a little bit, you know. Well, I actually I asked him that in
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reference to Dana G. There's this no Dana's had a great career writing on the Simpsons [ __ ] great great specials
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the whole thing. Lauren said the thing I I Yeah. I said, "What did you see in us?" Because I was like, "What do you
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see in me and Sam?" Because we both were like, "What the [ __ ] are we doing here?" And he said, "Well, you guys had
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original thought." Yeah, that's a big thing is writing. They always look ready. I don't think
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that we both had like a joke somewhere that he hadn't heard before and I love that. That's why he hired us. What was what would be like at that
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time? Didn't Sandlers have the thing about who's guarding Will Chamberlain? Who's the Will Chamberlain thing is one of the
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greatest? Yeah. This for people for people comedy. That should be an NFT. Explain that.
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It should be an It was so original and so funny. But I want to know what your signature thing you might have had that or your goto
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your go your most surefire bit. You know I had a bit about going to an abortion rally to meet women that I knew were [ __ ] that was I remember that.
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That was pretty radical in 1989 90 like whoa. Well, well, Rock came came with more hype than Sandler, I think. I
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think Rock when I got there, everyone was telling me and I also heard a lot of hype about Farley. And then we knew
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Sandler from the Valley. So, me, Schneider, and maybe Dennis, maybe Dana were helping saying Sandler's funny. He
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came soon after, but it it was weird. Like first, you know, you can tell if people had game and sometimes you can just tell around the office, you can tell it read through, but I I definitely
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was looking around that place going everyone's great. It's un I mean, when you go down to Jack
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school of comedy, talk about original thoughts. Every Jack Andy sketch, I'm read through going, "You're [ __ ] [ __ ] me. I should
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quit the business. I don't even know what I'm doing." He would hit he would the the weirdest ideas.
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Yeah. Hey, man. I remember Mike Myers, just [ __ ] that didn't get on. I still remember to this day. I'm like, what the [ __ ] I've mentioned to people asked me about, oh, the greatest cast whatever. And I
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mentioned specifically 90 to 93 because of every there were too many cylinders firing and you'd have a tunes the cat or Myers do sprockets, you do Nad X, David
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do this, F Sandler, you guys were coming up and getting a fan following. I think those three years is like sometimes I'd
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sit back and go, "Man, that show kicked ass." Because they got the overlap. They got you guys and we're coming up and it's
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crossing and then you guys all leave and then it's just us. But yeah, we had Phil, we had Jan, we had, you know, it's just like that was a wild
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wild time. Yeah, it was a insane. I learned I learned more there than I learned, you know, any other time in my life. And good people, you know. You know what's interesting? You told me
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about Nicki Minaj years and years ago. I didn't know who Nicki Minaj was. and you go, "I said something about her." And you go, "Actually, she's really funny.
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She's she's got a great personality." And that was the first of me going, "Oh, really?" I like that you look at it with
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those eyes because sometimes I look at I can't help it when I meet women or and not that you were dating them, but when you just meet women, that sort of easy funny thing that comes out of them is
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always really a great quality because they don't try to be like Robin Williams. They're just they're a funny personality. I love it. Well, you know,
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you're you're a handsome guy, David, so you think you have a chance. I don't think I have a chance.
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You're the good-looking guy. Whenever we go out, they like Rock better. Okay. They always go, "Why aren't you Chris
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Rock?" And I go, "I can't be. He's Don't you get more handsome than ever, Chris. Don't you get that?"
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Oh, thank you. It's not like you're like It's not like you're aging horribly. I'll just say
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that you're you're very doing well. He looks cooler when he gets old. Yeah. If I lean back and have the mic here,
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I'm in good shape. The neck is not happy with this age. But this is pretty good. I lo You lose volume in your face and
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you kind of your face recedes into your skull, so you need glasses. You need This is something Jerry Seinfeld will do eventually. But um can I do you want to
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should I ask you kind of off the kilter question? Question last night. Oh, cuz I'm name dropping it. Oh, who did you have dinner with? You guys last night? Me, Jerry Colin,
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just what the [ __ ] Uh, Paul McCartney. Good. Good. Jesus Christ. Guy Siri, Jimmy Fallon,
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Jr. Did they shut down the restaurant or what the [ __ ] And I'm sorry. Which Cheesecake Factory? So Paul McCartney goes, you know, I'd
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like something, you know, a little sudsy on the top. And Jerry goes, I don't want anything.
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Sorry. Go ahead. I didn't say that as a name drop. I just I was just feeding Dana.
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Dine. I do Jerry Seinfeld as a serial killer because I don't think Jerry has two
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gears and Fallon does this one gear. But sometimes Jerry goes when he did his president bit. Someone wanting to be
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president. I think I'm just the right guy for that thing. I think I could do president. He has that. So I do him as a
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serial killer. I'm just going to go in, cut your sple, and go down the living, do the thing. Anyway, sorry. I could do
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Paul McCartney. Killed. Killed. Kills. Um, killed. So, what do you mean? The lady always kills. So, when you're in that situation with those people, you just look at the table
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and kind of go, I belong, right? I mean, you're chill. I mean, you you're in that situ. We're in that situation right now. We're all
00:18:06
pretty accomplished, us three. Yeah. Um Yeah. Yeah. I mean, no. Hey, nobody looks at Paul McCartney and goes I should be here. How you doing? My equal. Nobody does
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that. But he's there's no way. Maybe Jerry, but uh yeah, you know, through lots of therapy. Yeah, I can kind of relax doing McCartney seems like he likes to hang
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out. PE funny people also get a pass. They they like little court gestures around. I've been invited to [ __ ] out of
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mostly curiosity factor. They just go spade go keep it keep things moving. I'm likeoop, you know what I mean? They like that that you're gonna say something funny. You're enough, David. You don't have to
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be a jester. You're enough. I just got the results back. I have to be. They told me. My therapist told me.
00:19:00
So, Chris, so I I went into therapy with Conan's therapist. I piggybacked on his
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therapist at five. I was in it for five years. What What So you went through it intensely, right? So what's the headline? What did What's the takeaway for you? You know, mine was is that I
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have a hard time taking care of myself. I'm always trying to help other people. That'd be one of them. You know, I
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bought a guitar for my nephew, a really nice guitar, and then I had a hard time buying myself a guitar, and I have a lot of money. I said, "God, I'm sick." thought?
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Yeah, I mean, honestly, this apartment is probably the first real purchase I've made for myself in about I don't know, 28 years, right?
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Since I got that Corvette for at SNL like like lifechanging per purchase like And so what was that? Yeah, I know what you mean. Like Yeah. Always doing for other people.
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Uh I don't know. I mean, what I've learned in therapy is like, you know, childhood trauma is like some real [ __ ] for real. And you got to until you deal with all
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your childhood [ __ ] not you just, you know, nothing's going to work out for you. You got to you got to start at the
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beginning. It's like working on a script. Okay. Interesting. Page one. So, when I met you, you were a young
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man, but I Were you ever kind of like snarky and spoiled in high school? By the time I
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met you, you seemed kind of like this guy, at least in maturity. You weren't bitter. You weren't snarky. You were never in a group with comedians kind of uh [ __ ] on some other comedian. So,
00:20:47
I noticed that attitude you had as a young man, but I guess the childhood stuff for me, it was like I had a lot of anger and it it was in my standup. It was in my characters. And once in a
00:21:00
while I'd go off on any kind of authority figure that turned into my dad. But I I got, you know, I got past
00:21:07
that. But I How did your anger express itself then to you? I mean, here's the weird thing. It's
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when I was um I mean my child I was bullied ridiculously. Half of it the bullying because I was just a little guy and then I got busted to school. So I
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got I was a little guy and I was black, right? It's hard. So it's like I'm getting
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double bullied. I would if I was white I would have probably got bullied too, but it was just like ah
00:21:37
you're supposed to be tough probably. Yeah, it was pretty rough, right? And it was pretty like every day.
00:21:45
So I It's weird. I had a weird uh temper. I'm gonna It's going to be a weird thing. I was the oldest of seven
00:21:53
and and I was weird we weirdly smaller than my younger brothers. So it was a weird thing where your brothers like, "Hey, so and so down the block bothered me and I'm I'm like I
00:22:06
gotta [ __ ] go protect you." Oh, Andre or Tony. Wow. And I'm [ __ ] smaller than them. As my
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shrink puts it to me, you have been scared to be angry ever since. M. So I So the guy you saw
00:22:22
was bending over backwards to be nice cuz I was so scared of my anger. Yeah, I see. I was frightened of what you know my my
00:22:33
shrink my good the good shrink. I got you know like the top top guy. There's good ones and bad ones. They have definitely there's good ones and bad ones, you know. And he broke it down. It's like
00:22:47
because you're a nice guy and you're so scared of that thing coming out of you again. Yeah. That you let the whole world walk all over.
00:22:57
Your friends walk over you, your family walks over you, your your your female relationships. Like everybody just [ __ ] you over because it's somewhere in there
00:23:08
they know you there's a force field holding you back. Interesting. So confident in a weird
00:23:14
way. So I'm like the opposite of you in the sense that in the last year now I can get angry, right? I'm not scared I'm not scared of letting people know how I feel about certain
00:23:25
things. My therapy was about that too though because I was always the nice guy holding stuff in and not really my
00:23:32
aggression, my competitiveness overrode the nice guy because people ask me who meet me now, well did you just allow
00:23:40
other cast members like oh no Lauren do their sketch? That kind of thing. There was a natural competition in me. But in
00:23:46
my personal relationships, I I hated confrontation because when confrontation happened at my house, bodies flew. My
00:23:53
dad was just really violent. So I even all my siblings are like that. We don't like confrontation that goes in my house, too. It wasn't violent, per se, but it was loud as [ __ ]
00:24:04
Yeah. So, but those things stick with you. Just loud. Yeah. It just sticks with you. So now,
00:24:11
yeah, I can kind of I I can tell you I'm Hey, I didn't like what you said to me or I didn't like what you without losing my head without hitting anybody. Well, that's that's a home run for
00:24:21
therapy. Let me ask you a question. So, this apartment, I can't see much of it. So, it was a mental leap for you to buy
00:24:28
this for yourself. It Yes. Because you're all you were frugal too in a way, right? You're always you you wouldn't be the guy who would sp spend or the I always say your best manager or agent
00:24:39
is a low monthly nut. That is like right you you don't want to be doing the the fifth lead on Yeah. If you can keep a low monthly nut, chances are your career will be over.
00:24:51
Make good choices. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You don't have to say Yeah. There's meetings you don't even have to
00:24:56
take. Yeah. When the cameo guy calls you up, you don't [ __ ] return. called it [ __ ] you money in the 80s and I guess that's kind of what it is like or now it's just no
00:25:07
thank you. No thank you. Yeah. Yeah. No thank you. Yeah. When you said you were married and you
00:25:12
go I think it's mirac that are you scared she's going to take 50% and you go 50?
00:25:20
It's 80 now. You don't buy yourself much when you're married. Did didn't we have that conversation at the 40th backstage? What did we have?
00:25:30
I thought it there's so much there. You told me about the divorce and you you said, "Well, it's half." And you know, I
00:25:35
just mentioned that other people I'd known in the business and they go, "Well, it's half of, you know, community
00:25:41
property." And then the alimony adds up to more like 60 70%. It's about 70. Yeah. Okay. 70%. Which is fair.
00:25:48
It is. Yeah. I'm kidding. That's insane. That's I always say my my ex-wife has made more money off of comedy than uh Robert
00:25:59
Townsen. She also said once, "I'm the only comedian that has to drive a cab at night." You change that to Uber. Updating my app.
00:26:18
What kind of choices are you making now as far as uh girlfriends and stuff or dating or like how are you and this therapy is informing all of that? And I
00:26:28
think women generally do like when someone's straightforward, you know? Yeah. I mean, I don't know how I'm just not as desperate as I've been in the
00:26:39
past. Okay. Just, you know, just, you know, I mean, like, I'm just not like that thing where it's like, oh my god, I
00:26:45
can't believe someone's paying attention to me. And then, you know, Right. Right. And then you're in this weird lopsided
00:26:51
thing where you both you both have one thing in common. You adore her. Okay, here's a quote. I want you guys both to comment on this this quote. Just comment on it,
00:27:06
whether it's true or not. Men want to be admired and women want to be loved by a man they admire.
00:27:17
It's pretty accurate, I guess. I guess. I mean, I don't Men want to be admired by who?
00:27:23
The woman in their life. My peers. Well, that's when I make Yeah. Yeah. I mean, like when I make the
00:27:29
special or whatever, the only people I care about is like you guys, right? Other comedians I not even comedians, just comedians I think that are funny.
00:27:42
Yeah, I know what you mean. Yeah, that's the rest. I can And we know we we're in the tribe. We
00:27:48
know what like when we see you on stage. Well, I always love how you you have the
00:27:54
cord and the way you move and you're all dressed up and you look great and the crowd's going crazy and you're just
00:27:59
hammering it. I know what work went into that. I'm like, [ __ ] you know, and then
00:28:05
to throw it all away and just be connected to it. Like I I was really curious about this particular line you
00:28:11
had these anthems and one was a man's only as faithful as his options which it seems like it was just hanging around but it became quotable with my friends. It's what not whether it's absolutely
00:28:23
true but it's just a very funny astute observation. Pretty true. Um calm down came up with it. I think like one of my uncles said it to me. Well that's that's that's coming up.
00:28:35
Shoved it in a joke. Yeah. But that's coming up with it, you know, noticing it. And I think I use
00:28:40
that. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, that one follows me everywhere. Really? Oh, good. Good and bad, you know. Oh, it's like everybody a little too close with for Yeah. It's like any girl you date, it's
00:28:53
like a man's only as faithful as his options, you know? Like he's they're like, "Sir, are you out of options?" You're like, "Well,
00:28:59
yeah. I mean, hey, yourself in a corner." I had Well, Will isn't that special. I
00:29:05
can't get away from it. No, I'm kidding. Rock, what are the three top things that
00:29:11
people on the street know you for? They know me for I mean, they know me for It's weird. It's like especially because
00:29:22
of YouTube. Yeah. They don't even know whole specials. They just know jokes about this or that.
00:29:30
You know what I mean? Yeah. Like like specials end up becoming mixed together on some level. Sure. They don't
00:29:37
really just go that joke. You told this joke. Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of Madagascar too.
00:29:44
I was on uh I I get a lot of Oprah Winfrey when after bring the pain. I remember. So there's a certain amount. You'd be amazed at the housewives that or the you know that are into that know
00:29:57
what I do. But um I don't know. I mean it's not SNL anymore. It's more movies here or there.
00:30:05
I don't know. I'm like I'm like uh I don't know. It's like remember when we were kids and you just see um I don't
00:30:11
know. I'm trying to think. Certain people were just famous and you couldn't even figure out why. Yeah. You're like, "Why is Charo famous?"
00:30:17
You know what was hard for me to realize? When people you're like were recognizing me. I thought, "Oh, it
00:30:24
was so great until I heard one people, one person say, oh, I know that guy. He sucks." And I'm like, "Oh, it doesn't
00:30:30
mean they like me. It just means they know who I am. They just know you. I mean, I'll tell you this. They're grown-ups is funny.
00:30:36
Yeah, grown-ups is a big one. You're right. You're right. Really, any young person. My god, grown-ups.
00:30:43
We're keeping the lights on at TBS, I'll tell you, because it's on like Yeah. TBS heavy rotation.
00:30:48
Grown-ups literally all the time. One and two. One and two. You know what question I got which you guys would might not like? Um, in my last interview, they go, "When were you the
00:31:01
most famous? And I thought, I know what he means. And I said, the real answer is right now because everything's accumulation
00:31:11
and then they've seen there's fame and then there's heat. There's there's hot where the phone
00:31:17
ring. Exactly. So I could tell you when I was hot, but yeah, I'm more famous now than I've ever been.
00:31:23
But in around me and Chappelle always joke about it. I always go, "Yeah, back when I was Drake." That's That's like Yeah. Drink Drink
00:31:35
them up. 2002 four. I was Drake, you know, whatever. From 96 to about 2000. It's like the third or fourth special in a row. It was like four specials in a row.
00:31:49
Very Drake like. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not There's no million-dollar nights now, but there were
00:31:55
those are you Well, Bill Burr, I don't know. What are these? What does he get? No, no, no, no. Bill Gar, please. Bill
00:32:01
Gar is Yeah. If you could do Madison Square Garden, you're doing arenas. You can, you know,
00:32:07
Sebastian does two Sebastian does two shows a night at. Yeah. Unreal. It's unreal.
00:32:14
Yeah. I love that. That guy really stood out for me. I mean, in the last five years as just funnier. You especially you go watch him at the store, you can't not laugh.
00:32:27
Oh, I laugh. I I I was in the back of the store and just going, "Oh my god, who the [ __ ] is this guy?" I was and
00:32:32
then I come in the next time I saw his name, I go in and watch where the funny thing now to me is when people were
00:32:39
playing like Madison Square Garden. I think you've played it, Chris. There there's these big places you hear of like in Boston, TD Gardens, whatever
00:32:46
it's called. There's so many big ones, the forum. It used to be reserved for like Eddie Murphy maybe and maybe
00:32:52
someone else. And now when you hear people that aren't even household names to me
00:32:58
and you go, this guy's playing this, you go, whoa, this is a whole new world where through a podcast or through
00:33:04
YouTube or through their specials where is a little under the radar, but they have a crowd that comes out. It's
00:33:11
it's it's pretty unbelievable. It's great. I think the exposure and social media and everything else, they become friends
00:33:17
with you. So it's kind of like your friend nobody is playing Madison Square Garden, you know?
00:33:23
Yeah. And also I I think there's more I I know in Europe and around the world they always
00:33:31
respected standup as a high art, but in America it's the standups are becoming a real art. Yeah. Because um in music music's become a a producers
00:33:44
medium. Yeah. So it's there's not a lot of singer songwriter. There's not a lot of no one gives a [ __ ] about liner notes
00:33:52
anymore. So the people that actually think are the comedians, you know what I mean? Like so there's kind of a you write your own stuff, which is hard to do.
00:34:03
Yeah. It's like, you know, uh, hey, I love Rihanna. Tom Sigora is a better artist, you know. writes all the [ __ ] He writes he writes
00:34:14
all of his stuff, you know. Rihanna's great. She's amazing. She's, you know, but you know,
00:34:21
in the in the tradition the nerdy tradition of coming up with your own stuff. Would you rather date Rihanna or Tom
00:34:28
Seagora? Be honest. I would rather date Rihanna. I would. Tom Seagora is a great example of someone that does I won't say numbers,
00:34:34
but he does a podcast. And then I ran into him and he goes, "We do these live ones." So he makes a shitload off his
00:34:41
regular podcast and he does a live one and it's crazy where I go, "You do not make that at threehour podcast." He's
00:34:48
like, "Yeah." I was like, and then he goes, "The next one we did it doubled." I was like, I don't know. Yeah. I He's His podcast
00:34:57
was great. And that's an example of that where I often thought when the web first came out, why couldn't I could I get a
00:35:03
million people to pay me a dollar a month and I'll just go apehit on YouTube. And that's starting to happen a
00:35:10
little bit where someone I don't I don't know Tom's numbers, but I would guess if he charges 10 bucks and he gets 50,000
00:35:17
people on his live YouTube little podcast, he's making a half million. Yeah. I mean, understand too, like I
00:35:25
don't want to get too technical. Humans need people to talk, right? So, whatever 100 years ago, 50 years ago, thou philosophers used to be famous.
00:35:38
There's no more [ __ ] philosophers. Uh people used to be religious and and went to a church every week. No one goes to church anymore. So, the only place people actually can
00:35:51
hear people say their thoughts is through standup. It's really hard. the last the last of
00:35:58
the speakers and you know I mean the last of the thinkers some of these preachers by the way are similar they walk the stage they're talking they're rallying people they're
00:36:11
talking everyone's into it when I'm writing material I watch preachers just as much as I write watch
00:36:17
standups really interesting you come off a little bit like that you work the stage you're like a panther
00:36:24
well my grandfather was a preacher my great-grandpa All I have preachers in my in my family line.
00:36:29
Well, you see, they're performers. That what what works. It works for them. They're loud. They give it to them. People, they find a premise, they milk it.
00:36:36
Yeah. I would when my my two sons were doing standup and they had the the main problem. So, I was around open micers a lot and the main thing was lack of clarity in the setup. So, I actually put
00:36:50
you on one of your specials. I said, "Look at this guy's language, this clarity of really digging into the premise. Everyone knows where he is." And then he drops the hammer. So, you
00:37:03
know, that that makes sense to me. And obviously Sam Kenisonson was a preacher. You could really see that, you know. Yeah, you might.
00:37:09
One of the best. The hardest guy to follow. I followed him once. Hardest guy to follow ever. I auditioned
00:37:16
for Saturday Night Live and followed him as an unknown in 84 at the comedy store
00:37:21
with no MC in between. Sam levitates the room and now Dana Clarko death. Death. I had no way out. There was nowhere to go, man.
00:37:37
So Chris, as far as just fun as standup, how much do you what size room and what's the situation? Like for me in a small room where I've got a notepad and
00:37:48
I have some bits and I'm trying out new stuff that is the most pure fun um for me as far as standup. I mean it's weird. I'm I start next week
00:38:00
or the week after. I go to I'm not going to say where because I don't know when this is airing but uh I'm playing a club
00:38:07
three years 10 nights in a row in the middle of America doing two shows a night.
00:38:12
Yeah. Yeah. Trying to get trying to get an act together so I can go on tour next year. Uh that is fun once you once you get
00:38:20
enough bits and that are working. I mean, isn't it the greatest feeling? A new bit that's
00:38:26
coming together time is early in a tour. You've been on stage about 45 minutes. You're killing
00:38:38
and you know, and I just feel the audience is like, "Oh, you [ __ ] ain't heard [ __ ] yet.
00:38:44
You're loaded up. You're all you're happy. Oh, you guys think you just heard a great joke when you hear this?
00:38:50
Your closer is coming up." Yeah. Have you ever wrote a bit, Chris, where it came together so perfectly that you
00:38:58
thought, man, I don't know if I can write something that good again? I mean, or equal to it, you know?
00:39:03
I'll say this, this bit when my daughter Lola was born, the doctor hands me my child and literally out of my mouth, I'm like, gotta keep her off the pole. It
00:39:16
just came out of my [ __ ] Say that again. gotta I was like I gotta keep her off the
00:39:22
pole. Oh, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. Strip her. And it was like one of one of the best one of the best bits I ever came up
00:39:28
with. It's like should I just get women pregnant to come up with me? Yeah. It's fun. It's like a song. I'm sure you ask uh any song, you know, people sometimes they're one hit
00:39:40
wonders, but there's one hit wonders where I go, "This is such a perfect song. Like everything about it is
00:39:45
working everything." And you go and you don't want to be that as a comedian. So there's only a few things when you get older that still get me going. It's like there's a few tiny things in life and one is coming up with new ideas. Just or
00:39:58
saying something fast in real life, you're like I [ __ ] thank god my brain still works cuz that's fun. And when you
00:40:06
still like to do stand up or still like to write jokes, I'm happy because I know some people that are burned out on
00:40:12
showbiz or burned out on that and they just don't like it anymore, but they go through the motions or a comic that travels with the same hour for about 20
00:40:18
years, which they used to a lot, same act, same every year you'd see them. They come around your city and I'm like,
00:40:24
"Fuck, they didn't change anything." But it was okay. Now it's fun to to write and see if you can scrape together another hour. That's good. But isn't that uh sometimes I wouldn't say I'm
00:40:35
embittered by it, but I'm like envious and I'll just say the Rolling Stones. I I'm just envious of people uh of but we
00:40:44
we have to create new material and rock stars can just do their top 15. We don't even want them to. And I I really believe the Stones are better than they ever been because I think
00:40:55
really winding down on a song over decades where you just know it so well. And Jagger never stops working. I mean, he, you know, and he can he's his voice is exactly where it needs to be at
00:41:07
almost 80. But with standup, you're like, I can't. Okay. Got to start [ __ ] a whole new hour. I mean, it's like, wow.
00:41:14
Yeah. It's it it's And it doesn't get any easier. I'm sitting here right now. I'm like, "Okay, I got I literally have
00:41:20
shows in next and two in le in less than two weeks. I have [ __ ] shows." Well, there's two there's two things going on there. There's there's Chris Rock Unknown
00:41:31
surprising the audience. Now, the expectation is, you know, when they when they introduce you to make sure they don't go over the top with it because I've I've been dropping mics, ladies and gentlemen, you
00:41:43
know, this guy's gonna bring it. You're going to really, you know, what's your what what do you want the MC to do for
00:41:48
you in the club? He's trying out stuff. What do you want him to say? I just just say my name. No credits.
00:41:55
Just don't hype it up or I mean, it's weird cuz it's like you can't get away from being Chris
00:42:01
Rock. You can't get away from being who you are. And by the way, you can't get away from being who you are to the guy intro
00:42:08
introducing you, right? You know what I mean? Yeah. because that guy's a comedian and he this is what he's
00:42:14
I met Joe I met Joe Koy once 10 years ago with love it or maybe it was 12 and he started tearing up just meeting me he started wise were watering I go Joe
00:42:25
it's okay he's huge now but uh there there is that expectation and you try to remember the way they see you you know
00:42:33
the way you would see someone above the food chain when you were starting it's interesting
00:42:38
yeah I forget who used to say somebody said at their first Letterman, they sat down and it was like talking to a $5
00:42:45
bill. It was cuz you can't Yeah. You can't Letterman Letterman was so intimidating to me that
00:42:51
the last few years I I would just get on my heels. I I'd be in the wings and I'd
00:42:56
see him, the last thing I'd say when they'd introduce my name, "Don't give this show too much respect." Like,
00:43:03
pretend it's Bakersfield today just to get past the intimidation of David Letterman. There was something about New York, that theater in him, and I didn't know he I was intimidated by Biff. Biff was
00:43:15
standing Biff, you know what I mean? And he was like looking out and he's like 30 seconds. I'm like, "Fuck Biff, I got to go out
00:43:22
there and he's so casual and I'm like, "All right, I got to get his love." Yeah. I remember being
00:43:27
Yeah. I couldn't believe Biff wasn't an actor. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Because he was on the show.
00:43:33
He's the last thing he seen. He actually was actually And they make him work. He really wanted
00:43:39
affirmation from Biff and that. How you doing, Biff? Biff, are you all right? Oh, cool. I'm like, Biff, back, you know, there was a time Biff was more famous than me. I was like, [ __ ] Where's your dressing
00:43:50
room, Biff? Hey guys, if you're loving this podcast, which you are, be sure to click follow on your favorite podcast app. Give us a
00:44:03
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00:44:15
an executive produced by Danny Carvey and David Spade, Heather Santoro, and Greg Holtzman, Mattie Sprung Kaiser, and
00:44:22
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00:44:29
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00:44:38
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