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Karen Berger welcome to my podcast a thanks for having me what a lovely day it is 9:30 on a on a Monday morning
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little bit of um behind the scenes here so uh you and I have been going backwards and forwards we set this up
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maybe a month ago six weeks ago and I assumed that you were going to be an ockland for net wall but I I had no idea
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the significance of the game so yesterday afternoon it was um New Zealand versus Australia and you guys
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won congratulations and it was your it was a milestone game it was your 50 game yeah as a silver Fern and at the end
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there was a presentation with a big bunch of flowers and uh massive highlights were were playing on the on
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the video screen and here you are the morning after oh gosh yeah it's been a
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massive couple of months for us actually to be honest a year um heaps a net ball
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so it's just good to have finished on a highlight that last night unfortunately
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we didn't come away with the cup because of the gold differentials but to be able
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to win the last couple of games against Aussie was amazing and I wasn't aware of
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the Milestone and that it was happening so um I pretty much found out when I arrived at the game how are you not
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aware um well you know like we don't track how many games we play like we get
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told oh great you've played so many games so um I knew it was coming up at some point because of the filming that
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they' done prior so I just didn't know when it was going to happen to be honest
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I actually thought I missed it this year um and I think I was watching the men's
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game before ours and one of the um CA people came up to me like oh congratulations I was like um on what um
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so yeah that's pretty much when I found out but it's good to not know because
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that just adds a bit of extra pressure on you that you don't need need you know
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celebrations and surprise afterwards quite nice yeah but it must be a nice time to I don't know maybe take a moment
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to pause and reflect on where you've come from because I I mean I before I started researching for this chat I I
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thought I knew the Caren Burger story I thought talented netballer maybe got shoulder tapped to come to New Zealand
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and and sort of develop here but the the actual story is quite different and we'll get into this but you moved here
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when you were 18 you weren't on anyone's radar when it came to like high
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performance sport yeah and you just like grind and grafted away for many years yeah um I think people quite often ask
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me like why did you make like what made you make the big move um and at that point like when you're 18 you just want
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to go do something you want to have fun like any Adventure is a good Adventure so Mom mentioned that she had family
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here was actually here I um Dad had a best friend over there or mom had family here which I hadn't met at that point um
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but I thought yeah why not and I just came for a holiday for a gap Year and that it's turned into 12 years um and I
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think the Nets are good driving force for me to want to keep to stay um but I also started building a life outside of
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that and I think that's what helped with that grind uh didn't take well took me
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up to seven years before I actually pulled on that black dress so um and again people ask me how how you lasted
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that long or how you kept grinding but if you've got stuff other stuff that you
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can focus on and also not have all your eggs in one basket that's just a part of
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your life um so yeah I really started building a life for myself in New Zealand and that's why I could have
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stayed and kep doing what I was doing yeah yeah it's a good message and we'll
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we'll dig really deep into into all that as we get through first first of all I
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just want to go back to last night a little bit so so the day of a big game like that New Zealand versus Australia
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um what what does what does the day look like so you get up in the morning yeah game day is pretty much Groundhog Day to
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be honest it was a bit of an earlier game so we didn't have the as much downtime as we usually do but we get up
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in the morning we go to our Captain's run that's mainly for our Shooters to
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just go shoot um we've this last couple of series we started because we've got a
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lot of young ones in our team and we've started dancing so you're 30 what's
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what's a young one oh no we've got like babies like 19 year olds like 20 21 year
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olds like they're really babies um so um we've started this dancing um so
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cool and we just danced to start off with the captain's run it just gets the
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vibe going and that um yeah just some fun and then the shooters get to shoot so finish off our Captain's run go back
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to the hotel pretty much eat and rest and eat and rest and eat and rest until we have to strap and get ready for the
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game so it's a pretty chill day um but yeah pretty much Groundhog Day for for
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game days are you nervous the day of a game um yes and no I don't think the nerves kick in for me personally until
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I'm actually out there on court especially standing singing The Anthem or sometimes in the changing room um and
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it depends on the magnitude of the game as well um but once that whistle goes it's gone because then the adrenaline
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kicks in and you're good to go so it's just managing that stress beforehand so
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it just doesn't override um your performance and so what happened in the series so the first two games Australia
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um beat New Zealand quite convincing by like sort of 10 points each game and then the second two games you guys
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turned it around completely they were they were tight wins but they were still wins yeah I think um a Home Advantage
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counts quite a lot for the team whoever and whoever's country it's played and
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Australia had a massive um crowd like two massive stadiums um and also they're
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the reigning Champs I mean well deserved they play amazing neet Ball but we also
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knew that we can do better we're way better than what we've been putting out
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there so it's just good to have seen in the last couple of games we started clicking and then we had that eighth
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player the crowd backing us as well so we really just wanted to um put some pride in that dress and um play for the
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country because we've had massive support which is amazing we're very grateful for so we just want to put it
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out there for the fans as well yeah it must have been a strange uh feeling for Australia last night because um they
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just lost the game um the series was tied to all and they won this Trophy and must be really weird like losing a game
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and then after giving it everything and then winning it must feel like like a bit of a hollow victory in way I know it
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was an interesting Vibe cuz like even though we lost we were quite excited and happy because we'd won the game and
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obviously they' lost their game but they still won the cup and I think there's
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the discussions are up there about whether we add a fifth game yeah deci makes sense yeah yeah but I mean like
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they well deserved that win because their goal differentials was a lot higher and wi you going and that was the
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nature of the of the cup so we need to make sure next time if we do lose we can't lose by heaps like that but yeah
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hopefully on the cards we can add another game and then make it a um tight deciding game um but yeah that will just
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add add to the time that we're away from home as well and add to the load but
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yeah I guess we get to do this because we're fortunate enough to play in that
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black dress so what's an extra game yeah and then and then what happens after the
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game uh as I said it's Monday morning we're recording this at 9:30 you're
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looking amazing hasn't been an all nighter clearly no no um luckily because it was
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an early game last night quite a lot of um the girls jumped on early flights to go home like I've mentioned it's been a
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massive um month for us um and also this time these moms and the team have been away from their kids for a while so
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everybody just wanted to get home um so pretty much most of the team jumped on the on planes earlier to go home um a
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couple of us stayed behind for some other things but yeah usually after game everybody's so tired just want to go
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home have a really good feed and get into bed cuz generally we've got late games so we don't get to bed by like
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until 11: wow I thought you'd be out for like a team dinner or some celebratory
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drinks or something is it not not like that um sometimes it's like sometimes
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yeah depends on the vibe um I think we spend so much time together that having an extra dinner is not necessarily what
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everybody's wanting at that time everybody just wants to get back to their significant others and and their
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family so um yeah I think we've seen enough of each other this year to not want to add to that yeah yeah well
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speaking of significant others so um you're sort of famously single um it feels like it it's become like a I don't
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know like a footnote in the in the Cen bger story but um I believe there might be there might be someone simmering oh
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gosh uh now your your teammate and friend Maya Wilson I I oh my God I tapped into her for some um she's been
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on the podcast previously and I tapped into her for some info and she said well I mean I I know the story that she told
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me but obviously there's two sides story every you look embarrassed obviously there's two sides
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through every story so I'm K to hear your version of events um key words Christ Church
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coryland god um yeah oh gosh um I guess yeah big 30 single um I'm a little bit
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picky um I think it's with more with my time more so than anything else um that
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unless I really feel like there's something or that I feel like I'm in the
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right place personally quite often it's not to do with other person but me as
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well um I don't want to drain my energy and I'm a firm believer of the right
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person at the right time will happen so I'll just wait for that to happen but
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yeah um the team's always trying to play Cupid um with me which is really cute uh
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is it annoy is it is it cute or is it annoying annoying sometimes uh no they've only got my best interest at
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heart um so I don't mind that um and I guess I'm a big enough girl to be like
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no stop now so um no it's really cute but yeah gosh the latest one um yeah it's just a uh we had a lady that was a
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it's a massive netball supporter um and she's beautiful she still sends me
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messages it's really cool um and I think she probably just asked in the team
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who's single because she's got a son then that's also single so try to play
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matchmaker there yeah that's probably as far as I'll go the moment because that's
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as far as it's gotten can I fill in some of the some of the blanks according to
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my award oh gosh yeah sure so apparently you guys are in the lounge sitting as a
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team and this this woman comes over and she's like who's single who's single my
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son's single which one of you guys are single so it's like she just wanted a
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netballer not necessarily zoning in on Karen burger and then and then you made you follow her son on Instagram and he's
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a doctor or a radiologist well we haven't followed each other but um oh I heard there was a couple of DMS that
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have gone big we've messaged yeah but um again like busy schedule you know like
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you mentioned he's a doctor so he's busy as well but yeah it's I mean it's it's
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one of those stories if it ends up if it ends up I mean the chance is very slim that it's it's going to end up being you
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know your soulmate but in the event that it is it's a hell of a meat K look to be honest at this point point
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the people how I meet people are quite interesting um I'm not overly social um
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and that's what my mom and my sister always tells me you can't sit at home
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and expect to meet the right guy so and I'm also fussy about um social media I'm
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old school in that way I like being approached either in person um or just not on social media but I know that's
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the way things go these days so um it's more so about how they approach me on
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social media as as well which sometimes can throw me off or not so how do you mean what throws you off I think it's
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how uh like if you go directly into my looks or like that kind of stuff I don't
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yeah if the first comment on a DM is something superficial it's yeah yeah so
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it's all about how you he talked to me in the first instance as well whether
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I'll give you that attention or not so you you seem you seem incredibly um self
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assured like where does this come from I don't mean that in a in a negative way
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either I think it's a good thing yeah um it can be a good and a bad thing sometimes um I'm guessing a lot of
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people find it intimidating that's what I've heard and I think that's probably
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also why I probably am single at this point um I've like heaps of my guy friends tell me that I come across quite
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intimidating which is like like I'm really not um but yeah I think it's just
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part of it has got to do with having moved to New Zealand um at 18 and having to you know just fight my own way and
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find my own way and um being alone quite often you just have to be comfortable with yourself and spending that time
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with yourself um I mean raised um by m and dad in a way that we were able to go out and do that kind of thing and just
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want the most out of life and be self assured in ourselves um and know who we are and be happy with ourselves
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regardless of what the outside world sees or does so um yeah fortunate to have had that upbringing um I mean the
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person I was when I first moved to New Zealand is completely different who I am now um yeah I've I've heard you refer to
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yourself as being sort of shy and introverted yes very years ago but I mean you go you go through a lot of
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growing up in your 20s don't you yeah I'm look to be honest I'm I would still
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say I am shy um uh yeah it's a bit of a a balance thing for me I would still say I'm shy
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at times um but definitely have grown up quite a lot since I probably when I first moved I would not have spoken
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unless it was spoken to me I would just like hide in the corners I wouldn't want
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to do anything um whereas now I try and put myself out there I've realized over
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the last few year or like over the years that I've been in New Zealand any opportunity is a great opportunity so I
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have to put myself out there even though it puts me in an uncomfortable position
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sometimes so um and that's worked well for me so yeah well let's play enough
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about your dating life we can we can move move on but have you been in love before have you had a relationship a
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long-term relationship before yeah um I mean when I was a lot a lot younger I think since being in New Zealand I
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haven't had a long-term relationship um really but you moved here when you were
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18 yeah I know that's single for a very long time isn't it um no I've like
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talked to people here and there but never like I mentioned the time and especially with Nall being so busy I
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just never had the time to really um want to spend that um on a significant other I think I was really just focusing
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on myself but yeah back in the day I had at high school I had a a partner for well boyfri for three years um yeah and
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then before I moved to New Zealand I had a long-distance relationship for about a
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year or so and just ended up um having to end that because he had a life in South Africa I had life in New Zealand I
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just didn't see that working or going anywhere so yeah we ended that and yeah
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ever since it's just been me grinding away by myself so but the right person
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will come at the right time 100% yeah um something else Maya Wilson said us that
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you she described you as a Shopaholic and she said wherever she said um and she even said um pretty much every city
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you go to a Pat from in Vago yeah apologies inago gosh um like um because I am just me I don't have
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kids to take care of I don't have a partner or anything so pretty much the money I have I can spend on myself so I
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was like um I'm very big on budgeting though like I know I spend um but I make
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sure that I can spend the money that I do spend um so this time around I took an extra little hand luggage you would
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have seen me coming in this morning with my extra little um roller case yeah there's chicken suitcase and carryon
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yeah what did you buy yeah so the carry-on was empty when I left um yeah I oh gosh what I what did I buy um I
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bought the shoes I'm wearing uh I bought some boots uh I bought a dress I'm going
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to the races in November in Christ Church uh bought a summer dress gosh I bought some face products
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yeah anything and everything really God you must be exhausted by the time the game plays you Caren oh she's been
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shopping all day that's my therapy though like I even though I don't buy
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anything it's just nice to get out of the house um and just get amongst people
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and in the shops and things uh it's just my retail therapy yeah oh fair enough
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yeah right say so let's go let's go all the way back um um back into the early
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days of Karen Burger so tell me about South Africa where are you from you're
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from like a small Country Town yeah um I usually just say Cape Town but it's a
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few hours away though yeah about a three-hour drive but it's like three-hour drive up the West Coast um
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quite a small town um went to an even smaller town from that town primary school because Mom was my first grade um
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teacher she's a the a teacher for the first grades there um Prim Primary School in a very small town slightly
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bigger town for high school um but all my sports and everything was pretty much in Cape Town every weekend so um spent a
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lot of time in that area um so I'm quite familiar with that area as well what's
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what's I've never been to South Africa but um one thing one of the first things
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that that gets sort of bought up is um just how how violent and unsafe the place is in terms of car jackings and
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stuff is that your experience um I think it get a bad R yeah yeah I think growing
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up there um it's just you know what to do and what not to do and I think if you
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stick to those rules you're quite all right sometimes you can be a bit unlucky
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at times um but since living in New Zealand I have realized how bad it can get um and how amazing it can be um and
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going back home I do real I definitely notice it's ramped up in the last few
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years as well um when I speak to my family again I realize how South Africans that live there just so used to
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it that they don't necessarily know how bad it can be um but for it's an amazing
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place I love going there on holiday um again if you go with the right people and you know what to do and what not to
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do it's it's all right it's all good um but yeah it's definitely a sense of
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having to look over your shoulder uh quite often yeah although like and saying that just while you were giving
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that answer I mean you know new New Zealand we're not entirely safe anymore anyway are we there's you know Ram raids
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all the time and yeah we got our own issues I think every country has their positives and negatives and like my
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sister I know she loves the country itself it's beautiful um and the people like she's especially saying with the
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Rugby World Cup at the moment it's amazing how rugby can bring everybody together and how um supportive everyone
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is at the moment in The Vibes in South Africa at the moment over there so it definitely has its positives don't get
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me wrong so it's not it's not the worst country yeah well by the time this
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podcast comes out it's going to be old news but yeah theug World Cup final is
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next weekend it's New Zealand South Africa um one one country you were born in it's been 18 years one country that
00:19:05
you've represented and Sport for the last five years and spent 12 years and who who are you who do you root for yeah
00:19:11
I've heard this quite often um over the last couple of weeks um people keep asking me that too um I think values
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wise and morals wise um I can't justify not am supporting the All Blacks I live
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in a country I play for the country represent the country I benefit from the country so for that reason I would
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support the All Blacks but um obviously have that little piece of heart with South Africa so I won't be gutted if
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they do wi either it makes the game quite fun because regardless of what the outcome is you're going to be a happy
00:19:45
exactly I know we were watching we had our training when South Africa was playing their um semifinal um the other
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day and it was such an intense game we were just stra or like finishing at tying our shoelaces and getting ready
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and I think MAA or Tiana put up the story um about us watching that last few minutes of that game and how we
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celebrated and everybody got in on it as well like I mean they're not even South
00:20:10
African supporters but they um got into it as well so yeah really felt the love from the team there yeah well I I think
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anyone just really likes watching like a good game of rugby and um we've been
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spoiled with him the last couple of weeks in those quarterfinal games and then that that game against England the
00:20:24
semi-final game that was just phenomenal was remarkable South deserve to win it was ex the performances out in the Rugby
00:20:31
World Cup has has been amazing so um yeah it's been an exciting World Cup yeah so what do you like in South Africa
00:20:38
as a as a young girl you were a high jumper eh I was yeah well small town so there wasn't many options to do in terms
00:20:46
of um sport uh but I try to do as much as I possibly can um my two like main ones were in the winter neat ball and in
00:20:55
the summer was high jump um but gosh I played tennis I did a bit of gymnastics if there was any dance
00:21:03
classes I would go do that um and I think when I was about 14 uh I tore uh my cartilage in my knee
00:21:11
and I had to have an operation and at that point mom was like right I know you love doing all this stuff but I think
00:21:17
we're overdoing it a little bit with your body you need to pick and choose what you want to do so at that point I
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was like right okay in the winter I'll do neat ball in the summer I'll do um
00:21:25
high jump and I loved high jump it was so good but it's a very individual sport
00:21:29
um anybody in athletics will probably be able to tell you that it's a good Community um don't get me wrong but you
00:21:36
when you're competing it's pretty much you just you so I sort of L A little bit
00:21:41
more towards the netball the team sport yeah how did how did you how did you mess up your knee at the age of 14 like
00:21:46
um a cartilage tear that sounds like an older person's injury doesn't it yeah I
00:21:50
know um well apparently according to the doctor because of the high jump the constant like landing and twisting on
00:21:56
the leg and then the the neet balls that constant like jarring on the knees um and I guess at that age you don't really
00:22:04
do much prehab rehab kind of stuff so um which when you get older you sort of regret a little bit but yeah I think
00:22:12
just overdoing it a little bit too much on everything um and not managing myself
00:22:17
well enough at that age but yeah they're holding up so far yeah oh listen you
00:22:22
played your 50th game for New Zealand last night you're doing the old knes are
00:22:26
doing just fine so did they did they operate at the time did they like scrape you out clean you out yeah well funny
00:22:31
enough because at that age they were like you're quite young we don't want to
00:22:34
take any of it out so they tried to just Stitch it up and see if they can obviously there's not much blood flow to
00:22:40
that area so it was going to be a risk whether it was going to work or not but it ended up working um but over the
00:22:46
years the last few years especially they've got you know damage to them again I've got a few tear here or there
00:22:53
but not significant enough for me to have to do anything about it so it's just managing them really yeah cuz I I
00:23:00
was knowing that you were coming around today I watched the game last yesterday afternoon under a different sort of lens
00:23:05
I guess and in particular like focusing on you and um yeah there's there's a lot
00:23:09
of jumping around isn't there and I was thinking about your knees with every there's a lot of
00:23:15
impacts I mean it's it's remarkable that you've that you've had and continue to
00:23:19
have the career that you have um given this um this knee issue at the age of 14 that could have that could have spelled
00:23:25
the end of any sort of like dreams or hope really couldn't it yeah well at that time when it did happen the doctor
00:23:30
did say look um as little as much sport like if at all going forward and I was like well that's not happening I was
00:23:39
determined to be like no that's definitely not me um so I guess you just get back on the grin you just have to
00:23:45
listen to your body um sometimes you can do things sometimes you can't and I
00:23:50
think that's where physios and doctors come in quite well they know what every
00:23:53
individual is capable of doing or what they can't do uh unfortunately the way I
00:23:57
I play is quite hard on my knees and my ankles um but I'm going to do it for as
00:24:02
long as I can um as much as I can until the body gives in and then I'll go and
00:24:08
enjoy the rest of my life yeah and I I think um yeah one thing that the um the well- meaning medical experts can't
00:24:14
necessarily take into account is um probably someone's like will or determination so they can say oh you you
00:24:21
probably shouldn't do sport but it's like they don't know you as an as a
00:24:24
person or what your mindset is their mind is an amazing thing um and it's helped me at times or the worst of times
00:24:31
um in times when you think you literally can't do it anymore um it's really
00:24:35
pulled me through so I think that's the aspect of sport where you really have to
00:24:39
hone in at times um and it doesn't matter how good you're doing if you're
00:24:43
on that High um the lows do come um so it's just being preparing yourself because it's a roller coaster it really
00:24:51
is um and to dig yourself out of that and stay on that high is is it's a tough
00:24:56
one it's quite hard yeah we will get into all that stuff because there definitely has been um some adversity in
00:25:00
the Karen Burger story hasn't there um I mean one thing that Springs to mind I
00:25:05
guess is um the Commonwealth Games last year where you had like an ankle injury um that must have been devastating we'll
00:25:09
get into that um but yeah so you're growing up in South Africa you you're
00:25:13
good at nitb are you great at nitb yeah well um yeah I mean I made it into the rap teams yes um I was being
00:25:24
selected in those teams so I I was all right I was good um it's quite hard sometimes I I don't
00:25:31
like talking too much about um um my performances but yeah I the year before I decided to move over um I just played
00:25:42
uh the under 21s the protate um Squad had just had their trials I think it was in December um and I got selected in the
00:25:50
group to go into the final final trials but at that point I was like right do I stick it out here or do I go
00:25:59
for this opportunity in New Zealand not much offering for me in New Zealand but what would have been what would have
00:26:04
been an easier as the South African netball team as good as the Silver ferns or not would it I guess what I'm asking
00:26:10
is would it have been easier for you to stand in your home country and make your
00:26:13
national team there it's tough I really take my head off to the the players that
00:26:18
do play for South Africa because up until recently it was not a paid position um and I know people that
00:26:27
played in the South Afric or know of people that were studying for years and years and years because they just
00:26:33
weren't flexible the Unis aren't as flexible to be able to allow you to go
00:26:37
do that you can't maintain a job necessarily um if you want to go do that so it's just the grind is a lot harder
00:26:45
um I really take my head off to those people and I think personally for the my with my personality and the person that
00:26:52
I am I probably wouldn't have kept playing a i state in South Africa um I would have wanted to make a living I
00:26:58
would have wanted to be able to support my family I would have wanted to have a successful life and it just sounds like
00:27:04
it's really hard most of those starting lineup players for the pro tiers play
00:27:07
overseas they go and play domestically in another country and that's two lives
00:27:11
you're asking them to have one life in one country for half of the year and then you having me to go back to your
00:27:16
home country so um yeah it's a tough one so so as ni more professional here than
00:27:22
what it is in South Africa definitely 100% do you guys get paid okay a match fee or a salary how does it work yeah
00:27:29
look um there's always going to be the drive to want to be paid more but coming
00:27:35
from a country that don't get paid at all um I know how amazing it is and even
00:27:41
from when I started to where we are now there's been increases so I'm not
00:27:46
complaining obviously striving for more but um I'm quite happy it's it's easier
00:27:52
when you are playing for both domestic and international you can make a living out of it it's a bit harder when you
00:27:59
don't have that International salary and you're having to find a job that only
00:28:02
does half the year because the first half of the year you're pretty much in your domestic season so you're away from
00:28:08
work quite a lot so it's a little bit harder so do does some of the does some
00:28:13
of the girls have jobs um I don't think anybody in the ferns at the moment have
00:28:17
any jobs maybe some contract work here or there just to take them over um but domestically yes um there's a lot of
00:28:25
girls and and that's also how the schedule for the domestic teams have to adjust to allow those players to have a
00:28:32
job um because as great as it is to be playing and being paid for netball they still need to have a life outside of
00:28:39
netb and they still need that job so we need to accommodate them as well yeah absolutely okay so so so when does the
00:28:45
seed get planted about you moving to New Zealand I I heard it was like a secret from your dad yeah you bounc the idea of
00:28:51
your mom and it happened really quickly look um I was in my last year of school school um and around like June July I
00:29:02
think my uncle and Aunt who live here it's Mom's cousin um they went to visit
00:29:06
they've been living in New Zealand for more than 20 years now and we were in
00:29:10
Cape Town one day and mom was like right well my cousins over from New Zealand they're at the airport at the moment
00:29:16
they're literally just about to go back to New Zealand let's just go say hi so
00:29:21
we went to the airport had a chat as moms do you know they boast about their kids and they me that I play netball and
00:29:29
um yeah my uncle was like oh well why don't you send her over let her come stay with us for a year I thought this
00:29:36
was a joke like we just went about life for the next month or what started applying for universities for the
00:29:43
following year applied for some scholarships because I would have needed a scholarship um didn't hear anything from
00:29:50
the Unis you can and South Africa can literally wait till the last minute before you hear anything so by like o
00:29:57
October um I wasn't sure what was happening the following year and then my uncle messaged mom he was like no but
00:30:03
we're serious like are you sending her over um and at that point we're like
00:30:07
right well we've got nothing to lose um uh dad is a little bit harder to convince sometimes with these big
00:30:13
decisions in life why because he's protective or were you a daddy girl or yeah well um oh he's just he loves
00:30:22
security and not necessarily taking too many risks um that's when Mom's a good balance for
00:30:30
him because Mom quite like taking those risks um and so we knew it's was going
00:30:35
to take a while um to get dad across that line but this is the funny thing with Dad we're always like it starts out
00:30:42
with he would argue against it like we'll say something and he'll completely
00:30:46
argue against it but the more you talk about it eventually he just he just listens he won't argue anymore he'll
00:30:52
just listen and then he gets to the point where he starts agreeing and he starts talking with so so um I think we
00:30:59
fast-tracked that process a little bit um so we did all of that stuff in the background did all the Visas and
00:31:04
everything that needed to be done and um we started talking about it not that I was going but that there's a possibility
00:31:12
that you know it might be quite nice and I don't think we told him till about
00:31:17
like a month before I left like no this is actually happening now and for that first two or three years whenever mom
00:31:23
would miss me or I'd be homesick or anything um he would just be like no you
00:31:28
wanted to send her there you guys decided to do this so don't s and cry about it now so but I mean he's one of
00:31:34
my biggest supporters now um like he wouldn't want it any other way so he's
00:31:39
proud of me he supported me don't get me wrong um he was a bit about two in two
00:31:44
minds about the whole thing but he supported me regardless um and now that you know there's some success story
00:31:51
behind it um yeah he's I guess he's pretty proud yeah I mean well you look
00:31:55
you look back and um everything worked out fine and it's working out fine but
00:31:59
um yeah as I alluded to before tough [ __ ] grind tough grind so so so you come here was you didn't have like laser
00:32:08
point focus on the silver FS you were just here to have a good time and yeah look to be honest um everybody's got a
00:32:14
dream it was never a goal it was a dream um and with a dream you don't necessarily think that it is um possible
00:32:21
so I was like it would be amazing to play for the silver F but I never made it a goal um
00:32:27
I've tried changing my mind over the or my way of thinking over the years where
00:32:32
I don't like to um put too much attention um on something that because if it doesn't work I don't like that
00:32:41
disappointment feeling um but I've had to change that because to reach those
00:32:44
high things you have to put a lot of time and effort into it so at that point I was like I'm just here I'm just trying
00:32:50
to enjoy my life um I joined a local Club who to this day um like a family to me the of supporters love them all um so
00:33:00
pretty much joined the local club and I just played they gave me opportunities they sent me to rap stuff like I my raw
00:33:07
skills coming over I was not the best net baller I had so much to learn like my club coach benched me at times I got
00:33:17
in put into second teams and I didn't make it into um rep teams for years you
00:33:22
know it it it wasn't easy but I decided to BU life for myself outside and have
00:33:28
other things to focus on I had studies outside of of netball I tried to work wherever I could I had to work um to
00:33:35
support myself um so yeah it was a it was a really tough grind but along the journey I met the most amazing people
00:33:43
that that I still talk to too this day that um have meant a lot to me and have helped me throughout that process so um
00:33:51
it's been a fun Journey yeah so what those first couple of years look like because like I'm a Imaging if I was in
00:33:57
your position you're on the other side of the world you're so far away from
00:34:00
home every time there's some sort of hurdle or obstacle or adversity you must
00:34:04
feel so homesick yeah um what were you doing in those early years you found a job yes well my first job was here on a
00:34:12
visitor's visa and you're not allowed to work or do anything or study or anything
00:34:16
so I pretty much just enjoyed that year just try to you know see what New Zealand's like and just experience it um
00:34:24
and then I had this Sera sit down with mom over Skype um at the end of that year and
00:34:29
she's like right what's happening over there are you enjoying it how what's
00:34:33
happening I was like Mom I'm really enjoying it but at that moment in time I
00:34:37
knew what it was going to cost for me to stay in New Zealand um and I'm like
00:34:42
we're not the wealthiest of families like you know just an average Joe family
00:34:47
so I knew that if I wanted to stay I would have had to go study and international study cost is astronomical
00:34:54
um where especially in our eyes at that time so so I was like Mom I really love it here but I'm not going to put that on
00:35:00
you cuz I know it costs a lot and she's like We're going to make this work
00:35:04
obviously they had to go um get some money somewhere um put themselves in debt a little bit and that's why to this
00:35:12
day I'm not doing what I do just for myself I do it for my family as well because they offered up so much for me
00:35:18
to be here and do what I do so at that point I was like great I can go study I was like we're going to make this work
00:35:24
so my first year of studies um I joined the Institute of Sports and I was like I
00:35:29
need to work extremely hard because I need a scholarship the next year I can't
00:35:32
let my mom and dad have to put up any more money for me so I worked my butt off to try and um get the best grades I
00:35:40
think I got distinction that year um and I had to work as much as I possibly could because I didn't want to ask them
00:35:46
for any more money because I um they already spent too much money on me so I had to work for the money I had um mean
00:35:54
I was working at meca on Sunday just to afford my train tickets for the week um going in and out of the Hut in
00:36:01
Wellington so um but it's character building I mean I wouldn't take that
00:36:05
back for anything uh I learned a lot about myself and what it cost to be where I am um and then I guess after the
00:36:12
studies it just turned into work placements um I built the right connections the place where I studied
00:36:18
offered me a job so um yeah it was it was a tough first five years in New Zealand oh that's such a great story
00:36:27
that's such a great story talk about um yeah I don't know added stress or
00:36:32
added motivation to make it work like when you've got your parents with skin
00:36:35
in the game like that what did they they mortgage the house get a bank loan what
00:36:38
did they um yeah they put more money on their home loan they put put more money on the mortgage and I think Dad um I
00:36:46
think he approached one of his mates or something who's a massive supporter of
00:36:50
me too um and so I mean still paying those off really yeah yeah it was a big amount um
00:36:57
so and that's why whenever I can however I can um I support whichever way possible they they don't like asking for
00:37:06
help ever um but that's a great thing I think I was talking to my mom this morning as well our family are quite
00:37:12
tighten it and we're happy to help wherever we can we never ask but we always offer um and I'm quite fortunate
00:37:19
to be in that situation I know there's a lot of people that don't have those kind
00:37:22
of family situations so yeah I love them to bits man that's a hell of a story wow that's
00:37:30
really really cool but also so much pressure at that young age do you look back now from the lens of a 30-year old
00:37:35
woman and think so I'm guessing then you were 1920 like if you had your time
00:37:39
again you you'd probably be like don't borrow the money oh my gosh I uh that's
00:37:44
why it's so amazing that those kind of decisions only happen once um and again
00:37:50
it goes back to me the way things are supposed to happen it will happen uh as long as I put my best effort fo forward
00:37:57
and I do the best I can um whatever needs to happen will happen so if I know I've done I've given it my all and it
00:38:04
doesn't happen it wasn't supposed to um and if whatever happens there's always
00:38:09
doors that open and closes so I love opportunities I grab them or whenever they come my way um whether they're good
00:38:18
or bad or whether they work out or not I meet people along the way that then puts
00:38:23
me in other directions so that was an opportunity that I grabbed that my um Family helped me with um and it was
00:38:31
amazing This World Cup was in South Africa in August July August um and this was the first time um since leaving home
00:38:39
where I had my whole family that was supporting me on the sidelines and there were so vocal I think they probably
00:38:45
enjoyed the whole process or the whole thing more than I did um and I think that was important for me to to show
00:38:51
them my Thanksgiving and give back to them as much as I possibly could um and whenever they talk about coming to visit
00:38:58
to New Zealand um I'm like stoked because they've only ever been here once
00:39:03
all of them um always trying and convince them to move over but I know it's a big move for them they got the
00:39:09
whole family so um that's a dream of mine to have them all here um but we'll
00:39:16
see how that goes play like Karen we can't afford it we gave you that money yeah I know right so I was like I
00:39:23
need to find ways I need to make a success I need to find ways to to help them to support them because I know um a
00:39:32
lot of them are Keen my brother he's very keen um to move over but um again it's almost like a package deal um I'm
00:39:41
quite fortunate and sometimes I do feel a little bit guilty being here because I'm the one that left and I'm the one
00:39:48
that gets to benefit and enjoy the life that I have now um and as much as they all want to move they're all like but we
00:39:55
don't want to go without each each other and so um at times I do feel a little
00:40:01
bit guilty for being here by myself but um like my uncle who also made that big move themselves like someone needs to
00:40:08
make that move to open the doors for others so um why why do you can you explain that or elaborate on that about
00:40:15
why do you why do you feel guilty um I think it is because I mean they put so much time and effort and money into me
00:40:24
being here and I get to enjoy it um and I know if they could they'd move tomorrow um but obviously there's like
00:40:34
the age with Mom and Dad's age coming to play um money side definitely is massive
00:40:40
coming to play um and they've got families now like I moved at a time where it was just me and they supported
00:40:48
me to do that whereas they've all got families to support so it's a big decision it's so much harder for them to
00:40:54
be able to make that move um and it's just that constant support from them to
00:40:58
be able to allow me to do this I'm quite grateful that I get to be in this position and even though they want to
00:41:04
they're not necessarily in a position too so I'll try my best to do the most I
00:41:09
can to help support them to do that now yeah and also you I mean you you say you're the one that gets to enjoy it but
00:41:16
[ __ ] it wasn't an easy rad like it was you were here seven years before you
00:41:19
made the silver ferns like were there times where you thought about like tapping out um and going back or not not
00:41:25
really the first three or four years um because we're such a tight-knit family
00:41:31
and um whenever anything happens I'm immediately on the phone to mom or my sister um to talk through the through it
00:41:39
with them and because we're such a tightnit family I really missed that element of
00:41:46
it um and so whenever I missed home or just needed somebody around me or things just weren't going my way or things were
00:41:54
just too hard I did consider I was like is this where I pull the plug is this where I go home but then I just reminded
00:42:01
myself no they've put the time and effort into me being here this isn't going to be forever um I was determined
00:42:08
to do something with my life here um and so I just suck it out or like sucked it
00:42:14
up and just kept going um with the support obviously from them um and I think it wasn't until I started playing
00:42:23
AZ leville and I started seeing the results that I was like okay no I can I think I can I can do this now you just
00:42:30
get enough enough of a taste of success to know that you're on the right track
00:42:33
sort of thing exactly yeah what did you have a plan B like you said you were studying before what were you what were
00:42:40
you studying for well at that point I just studied um uh towards a sports science degree um but it was pretty much
00:42:48
just something to tick me over um and keep the brain ticking over and it was something that I was interested at that
00:42:53
time um but I'm gonna go back into studies next year um I've discovered a
00:43:00
new interest in nutrition um which I really love and I think that's the tough
00:43:05
thing about being a netballer is having something else after netball and preparing yourself for it as well
00:43:12
because the end is going to come it's inevitable exactly and it's either going
00:43:15
to come if you're very lucky it's going to come on your own terbs otherwise it's
00:43:18
you're going to be you're going to be dumped or you going to be injured exactly so that's why there's this
00:43:23
constant thing in the back of my mind I need to work on that kind of stuff as well and so but I also want to do
00:43:29
something that I enjoy and that I would want to do I don't want to just have to
00:43:33
get up every morning and go do a job because I have to I want to do it because I love it and I want to and so
00:43:38
it took me a while to find something that I'm actually interested in doing um
00:43:43
and it wasn't until my injury last year that I got some downtime and I got to
00:43:48
reflect a little bit on things and Chang a few things and how I do um like with things about my own nutrition and that's
00:43:55
where that spark and started interesting me about what nutrition and what how the
00:44:00
food supplements the body and and what it does and so that's where I was like I
00:44:05
think this is something I can do um so yeah I'm going back into studies next
00:44:08
year 30y old going back into studies trying to do it Part Time mixing it with neall as well so I don't know how you f
00:44:15
everything in um uh look because of the grind that I did my first few years um I pretty much
00:44:25
got up in the morning 5:00 a.m. to go to the gym um to make it to school on time
00:44:32
and then at lunchtimes I might do some personal training sessions go back to school after school I always had work um
00:44:41
trainings in the evening so my days were very long back when I used to do the grind so nothing is is too much for me
00:44:48
anymore um actually I feel guilty sometimes when I'm sitting at home not doing anything on a day off I'm like why
00:44:56
am I just sitting doing nothing I could be doing something right now um but I also want to try and get myself into the
00:45:02
mentality of I need to enjoy this while I have it as well so yeah uh it's it's
00:45:08
easier now because of what I've been through wow that's really inspiring geez like yeah I
00:45:15
mean I mean the fact that you came here and you worked you worked so hard to get
00:45:19
to where you are today it's really cool like there must have been so many so
00:45:22
many points along the along the way where you thought about giving up or you wondered if you're on the right track
00:45:27
and um so much pressure on your shoulders as well support system honestly um I wouldn't have been able to
00:45:33
do it without the support system the right people um to encourage you at times um or the right people to tell you
00:45:43
when you're being um too much or when you're not doing too much um especially
00:45:49
now and throughout my nickb career as well um when you're just feeling a little bit down yourself you just need
00:45:55
that support to system to be like no you can do this or sometimes when you're at
00:45:59
the top you're like don't get too cocky you know you've got to um you know take
00:46:05
the situation enjoy it while you can but there's lows coming as well so um your
00:46:10
support system is massive yeah so you made your silver fins debut uh September 2018 so like 5 years ago so before that
00:46:18
you were in the like the Central pulks and those a andz teams yeah and then is that when you sort of came in the frame
00:46:24
of the selectors yeah I um funny enough how I I played Biv which is the development
00:46:32
right or now it's the Indian our league um under the franchise um in 2016 um had a really good year that year
00:46:41
for me personally and um because of the great year I actually got invited to a ferns trials this is without being in a
00:46:50
franchise um and I didn't know that was possible but um I hadn't played for
00:46:54
South Africa so it's not like I was was bound to having played with him and had
00:46:58
to sit out like four or five years so at that point like no you're eligible so uh
00:47:04
I went to the ferns trials and I think at that point a franchise the pulse because why M matanu
00:47:12
was a big um influence or like a coach for me at the pulse as well and so she one day came up to me she's like you
00:47:20
know you're eligible for the fs and I was like I wasn't even in the franchise
00:47:23
team at that point so I was like oh my gosh I don't know this um but yeah so I
00:47:28
got invited to the fs trials just experience I obviously saw it as nothing else I just wanted to be out there
00:47:33
amongst the best um and then that's when the pulse approached me because they put
00:47:37
up the argument well if the fs wanted to sign gave you an opportunity to trial for them for the country surely we
00:47:44
should be able to sign you as a domestic player because at that point I was still
00:47:48
I was not a resident I was still on a work visa um and so obviously they did the the stuff up the top and um and
00:47:56
that's where I got my first contract so I actually had a taste of of the ferns
00:48:00
before I I did franchise um but yeah that's when it all started um and it was
00:48:06
a bit bit of a shock for me my first year with the pulse because at that point I'd been playing um you know
00:48:12
starting lineup getting heaps of court time um and then I was behind the likes of at that point Phoenix kataka and
00:48:18
Katrina R now um you know I had an amazing team with K Kat L was on our team Sarah Bayman from England and we
00:48:26
had an amazing team um and I was pretty much sidelined um so that was a big learning
00:48:33
curb for me is like suddenly I'm now on the sideline um and I got so much attention from why um and if you know
00:48:41
her she's she's quite a Stern um strong personality who's that who's why why M
00:48:46
Manu um old so ferns coach player herself um yeah she's wealth of knowledge about n ball um made me a wing
00:48:57
defense and yeah yeah can't stop talking about how amazing she is but so she gave
00:49:04
me so much attention and I thought oh my gosh I don't think she likes me like her
00:49:09
training is always like Karen do this Karen do that Karen what are you doing I was like oh my gosh and I keep screwing
00:49:15
up I know is what it felt like so I was like oh what am I doing right I'm never
00:49:19
going to get out there um and one day Katrina came over to me oh she was gr but now already um she came over to me
00:49:28
and she's like because it was a tough training uh got a lot of yelling going
00:49:32
my way and she's like Karen um I know it's hard but if she's giving you
00:49:37
attention it's because she sees potential so that's a good thing when she stops talking to you that's when you
00:49:43
have to worry and that's immediately when I shifted my mindset I was like great um so I just started grinding
00:49:49
extremely hard um the following year I got invited again to the ferns trials and it just happened happened by chance
00:49:56
that I was in a group we had to do a drill where they needed a wing defense and at that point I'd never played Wing
00:50:02
defense before um and they were like great well you're the only person that can do it right now so we'll just Chuck
00:50:08
you in there and they didn't move me out of wing defense for that rest of the
00:50:12
trial so I was like great I see an opportunity here so I went back to the poll so we had this discussion about
00:50:17
what that was going to look like and they're like okay we're going to try and
00:50:19
make you a wing defense and so that following year I started getting my starting line up at Wing de and yeah the
00:50:26
race his history from there to be honest and then so you play your um Deb for the
00:50:31
silver F and you get sent off what um yeah what what happened there I tried to find the clip online I couldn't couldn't
00:50:37
find it anywhere which is probably lucky for you how do you I mean so you come you came to New Zealand 7 years earlier
00:50:44
you've been grinding away doing these long days fitting everything in day and
00:50:48
night this this could have been the beginning and the end of your honestly I felt this was the end I was like I'm
00:50:55
this is me I'm done um adrenaline pumping inexperience um playing against a very
00:51:02
experienced player um I didn't feel like the sendoff was necessarily bad enough uh or the
00:51:12
what they sent me off for was B enough but I knew the situation that got me to that point um prior to the game starting
00:51:20
the umpires did tell us that if you're on a warning you have to be extremely
00:51:23
careful and so yes the warning was warranted probably went for a ball I shouldn't have gone for um wasn't
00:51:31
playing rugby I was playing netball um and so I was on the warning and that's where the discipline comes in
00:51:38
the experience come in and um I just ran a j a jump a pass and um Joe Haron stepped into me to pass a ball and
00:51:47
obviously I landed on her so that cost me my send off and it was the fastest and the slowest 2
00:51:54
minutes of of my life I had to go sit on the bench for two minutes and watch my the rest of my team try and fight it out
00:52:01
there with six players on court I was playing with Casey Copa at the time in the circle we had to laugh about it
00:52:08
afterwards a few few months afterwards not immediately that I left her alone in the circle um but amazing coach nolene
00:52:17
put me back out there after my two minutes she didn't replace me she made me go back on there and fix my own
00:52:23
mistake there was only like 3 minutes to go in the game anyway but yeah I had to
00:52:27
tail between the legs go back out on court um yeah when you when you when you're sent off and you're sitting on
00:52:33
that sideline bear in mind the the significance of the the game you know being your debut for the silver F how do
00:52:38
you not how do you how do you hold the emotions on how do you not burst into tears um adrenaline I think was keeping
00:52:44
me keeping me going um I think I went back to the hotel the first thing I did was Google whether anybody else had been
00:52:52
sent off because at that point like red cards and send offs weren't like necessarily such a big thing like
00:52:59
recently we've had a few more of those happening but at that point it wasn't
00:53:03
really a thing and I was like oh thank goodness Tim AATA um George or Bailey at that point had been sent off in a World
00:53:10
Cup game and I was like okay it's okay I'm not the only one but I was still
00:53:14
stressing out um and I didn't get any communication from the coaches I was like oh no this is me this is my career
00:53:21
over um had the worst sleep ever that night um we had our one-on ones the next morning and I got called in amazing
00:53:29
coach that noene is she sent me down and she's like just trying to understand
00:53:32
what my thinking was around why I did what I did and how it happened um talked it through and she's like great well now
00:53:40
you've learned don't do that again and um yeah the next tour I I got game time
00:53:47
I got starting lineup so yeah just Testament to the coach that she is that she's very big on players learning from
00:53:54
their mistakes if if you learn from your mistakes I think she's happy it's when
00:53:58
you don't learn that's that's when you're in trouble yeah I've I've I've
00:54:02
recently begun to embrace failure because it's it's so important isn't it
00:54:06
it's like a stepping stone to success but um and yeah in reflection I suppose
00:54:10
that would have been really mean just to throw you out with the bath water yeah you know on your first de Booth that's
00:54:14
good that they gave you another shot um thank goodness but okay so so no one says anything after the game um like
00:54:22
silence till the next day it's that awkwardness because you know you did wrong you know um and so they don't want
00:54:29
to justify it by being like no that was like unlucky for you because you did wrong you have to acknowledge that but I
00:54:38
did have the support from the players that like it's okay it's not the end of
00:54:41
the world like don't worry about it so um yeah it's Torn Between Two because
00:54:47
you need to acknowledge that you made a mistake is that's how you learn from it
00:54:51
but getting that love from the players was very much the thank goodness yeah yeah yeah I mean you can look back and
00:54:57
laugh about it now with you 50 tests under your under your belt I know I don't hide from it I think um at the
00:55:05
start I was like I just don't want anybody to mention it but it's like you
00:55:08
say you learn from your mistakes and it's so important to learn from them so
00:55:12
I quite often mention it a lot of people don't even know about it and I would
00:55:15
bring it up I was like well I have been sent off and this is what I learned from
00:55:19
it so well I gave you till 55 minutes before I bought it up in this chat you went forthcoming with the
00:55:26
information um but so apart from so as your um as your Recollections of your first test day booth in New Zealand all
00:55:34
bad because of that or no no um to be honest I can't really remember too much
00:55:40
about my first few games anyway so um my key things I remember um are my first starting lineup um game and my first
00:55:51
time playing against South Africa that's the my key memories from my early days
00:55:56
on so I don't think I really remember much about anything else um and then in
00:56:01
terms of the World Cup there was an amazing experience I wasn't necessarily on in the very last game but my
00:56:09
personally for me was at that point I didn't hadn't had my family on the
00:56:14
sidelines since I left New Zealand uh or for New Zealand so um I heard my mom I think it was one I think we were playing
00:56:22
like against Botswana or something but I would always remember that game because
00:56:28
I grew up with my family on the sidelines wherever anybody had anything I was like we've got this modern in our
00:56:33
family one for all and all for one so wherever one went the other went so whenever I had Sports tours they were on
00:56:39
the sideline I could always hear them and in this specific game I think I went up for an intercept or something and I
00:56:45
could vividly hear my mom's voice in the crowd um and that's something I would
00:56:51
that that was my highlight of That World Cup because was that something that will
00:56:56
stick with me and the fact that she made the effort to come and watch me um and to be there to support me was yeah
00:57:03
amazing oh what a story is that the 2019 World Cup yeah yeah where silver FS won
00:57:10
yes yeah that was an amazing campaign I mean I'm fortunate enough to have been
00:57:15
in a team with amazing players Legends of the game um Laura langman Maria fow and um Casey Copa who are amazing
00:57:24
players and the campaign it was a gring campaign leading into that World Cup what we went
00:57:31
through physically and mentally prepared us for that final and um yeah I think we
00:57:37
still to this day there was a December camp that we we absolutely got smashed in anything we go into ever since then
00:57:45
was like is it going to be like that camp we compare everything to that camp so um but loved it loved it and hate it
00:57:51
at the same time yeah yeah well what a highlight so winning a World Cup what are the other like standout moments or
00:57:58
highlights in your career do you think um gosh uh obviously my first um game against South Africa especially having a
00:58:09
starting lineup in that game as well um I often quite get a quite often got asked what it is like playing against my
00:58:17
home country um I didn't know any of the players personally that were in the team
00:58:23
so I didn't have that personal connection with them and I never played in that team myself so I didn't have
00:58:30
that connection with them the only connection I really have is the fact that they are from my home country um
00:58:35
and that I could sometimes understand what they were saying on court when they were talking to each other it's got to
00:58:41
it's got to be so weird though with um hearing the anthem though like you got
00:58:45
two anthems pregame that bring you Goosebumps yeah I think that's probably the the weirdest thing for me is
00:58:52
standing um in the black dress um facing the opposition and trying to not sing along to the South African Anthem um and
00:59:02
I didn't really like this is the thing that I grew up not knowing how amazing
00:59:08
our Anthem really was until I moved here and everyone so many new zealanders um tell me about how they love the South
00:59:15
African Anthem and how beautiful it is and it's not till you hear that kind of
00:59:19
thing I was like actually yes it is really beautiful um so yeah new appreciation for it but really H trying
00:59:27
to not sing along to it I mean I sing along to it in my head but I suppose it's that saying like absence makes the
00:59:33
heart grow fond R so the the longer you are away from your birthplace the more of a connection you feel to it perhaps I
00:59:39
don't know yeah I um it's just amazing that the support recently as well and
00:59:44
going back and playing the World Cup this year in South Africa as well um the amount of support I get from from the
00:59:53
family and friends over there I do feel like I can do more in terms of my connection with back home um because
00:59:59
I left at such an early age not very many people know how long I actually lived in South Africa and so I don't
01:00:08
necessarily have that strong of a connection with when I do go back there um sometimes people are quite surprised
01:00:14
I was like oh my gosh you're South African I was like yeah yes I am and I spent quite a decent time there too so I
01:00:21
don't want to lose that that um side of me because your accent is not that strong is it I know so this is the funny
01:00:28
thing like when I go home I don't like speaking English because obviously like
01:00:32
oh why what do you speak Africans Africans yeah home language is Africans and so growing up um obviously second
01:00:41
language is a mandatory thing in New Zealand uh in South Africa especially English because we've got so many
01:00:48
different languages got like 13 different languages so you have to have a common one to actually understand each
01:00:53
other so um at school you've got your main language which to me was Africans
01:00:58
um but we have to learn English from a like young young age so I could speak it I could understand it fluently all good
01:01:06
but I never used it because I grew up in a like really small towns pretty much just Africans only spoke Africans so my
01:01:13
first real like chucking in the deep end was in New Zealand where I had to speak
01:01:18
it on a daily basis like that's probably also why the combination of being and that language barrier I wouldn't
01:01:26
really approach people or talk to people because I was translating in my head before I spoke whereas now whe whether
01:01:33
I'm Africans in Africans or English environment I think in the language that
01:01:37
I'm speaking but back then I was thinking in afri and I was like right I need to translate and so it took me a
01:01:43
bit longer to reply to or respond to people um like a buffering computer yeah yeah and quite often use the wrong words
01:01:52
or tenses or stuff but um yeah so pretty much just thrown in the deep end to have
01:01:58
to speak it on a daily basis and I think that's where I picked it up because I my
01:02:02
first time using it that much was here yeah well I'm I'm an idiot that can only
01:02:07
speak one one language and and and that's English so so explain that to me so you you're thinking in your head in
01:02:13
Africans and then you're then you're trying to translate it before you say it
01:02:17
out loud yeah like I would think about what I want to say before I say it like so I would hear it and I like right this
01:02:26
is what I want to say and then I would translate I was like okay now I need to say it oh my God it's gonna take such a
01:02:32
long time to order a coffee or something yeah but that was back then and so the and that's why like fully immersing
01:02:38
yourself in that culture is the best way to do it because now when I go home predominantly I speak Africans um and
01:02:46
yes okay it takes me a couple of days to not get stuck on Words uh but the moment
01:02:51
I'm in an Africans environment it just flows and I just think African can't
01:02:54
speak up fors and then I come home to new I've got so many homes and then I come home to New Zealand um and then I
01:03:01
was like right couple of days to just get the rain re regathered um and then think English speak English yeah so so
01:03:08
when you play South Africa and you can hear them speaking Africans what what sort of things are they saying oh just
01:03:13
like stuff about um if something's not working what they're going to do to fix
01:03:17
it right or um like well maybe on this SC a past they're going to say what they're going to do and I'll be like
01:03:22
right guys we need to do this cuz they're doing this so um it's amazing Intel isn't it yeah yeah I mean
01:03:28
obviously it's like you have to relay that message quite quickly to the other
01:03:31
people so no time to do the translate no no so quite often it's not really use
01:03:36
useful to know because it's not like you can relay to the rest of the team in
01:03:39
that quick few seconds but yeah it's quite interesting yeah and when you when
01:03:43
you play poorly how do how how quickly do you bounce back or when something goes wrong like we we touched upon
01:03:48
before the um the testday bo with the sand off yeah um yeah what what for you makes a good game and a bad game
01:03:55
I um last night for example your 50th test match where you won against Australia was that a good game
01:04:02
um I I would base it off a team effort but also an individual effort and how I helped my team I used to rate myself on
01:04:11
how much ball I got how many intercepts I got um but when you start playing International level it's so hard getting
01:04:17
ball and so if you get stuck on just um that's the way I rate myself um I can
01:04:23
get down on myself quite harshly and I was like no I still do a good job I still need to tell myself I'm doing a
01:04:29
good job so like last night we didn't get heaps a ball but we got ball and I
01:04:34
think to me it's about what I did for my unit and how I contributed to my unit
01:04:42
obviously the best thing to know that you did all right was the fact that you stayed on court in the first instance
01:04:48
yes I didn't get set off again um but yeah I think it's just how I helped my
01:04:56
unit and um the Kiwi style is very much to be playing together and for each other um so how I helped my unit to get
01:05:06
born that's that's and your style like again amazing coach who knows what your
01:05:12
strength is and you would have seen in the last couple of games she made strategic changes to make a difference
01:05:18
um because she knows what every single player offers and what their strengths are and so that all she ever asks of you
01:05:25
to do is just bring your best and so that's what I know I know what my strengths are they constantly ask us
01:05:31
what's your strength how do we get the best out of you and so I know what I need to go do and as long as I do that
01:05:35
well then I then I'm happy and and do you have like a like a post analysis or
01:05:40
anything with Dame noan and we yeah really when does that take place so you just finished the four game series well
01:05:47
not necessarily after the four games usually we have a series debrief um yes like we had one after the English series
01:05:54
especially going into another series we had to do that what's the goods the bads
01:05:58
what we need to work on all that kind of stuff and then we took it into the next
01:06:01
series so because we don't have anything else on for the rest of the year it's
01:06:05
not necessarily such a big Focus for us um we've only got one coming up next
01:06:10
January but I'm sure there will be things that because we also finished on a high and things were going quite well
01:06:15
there's obviously a lot a bit less to have to worry about and focus on um but
01:06:20
yeah no we do have a team debrief after the series to know what we did well what
01:06:25
we need to keep doing and what we need to change to to be better yeah you and Dame noene must have a special
01:06:31
relationship because she's been your your coach through your entire time at the the silver FS five years yeah she's
01:06:37
um it's like I've been with under here for so long and still like who was that
01:06:43
I can't remember who I was talking to the other day another experienced player
01:06:46
but we were saying it's still I wouldn't say intimidating but the aura and the person that she is you
01:06:54
it's out of respect that you still fear her um and it's it's a good way good yes
01:07:01
we absolutely have so much respect for her um um and like and again the kind of coach that she is uh if you play hard
01:07:12
and you play well you will get your opportunities you get feedback you get told what you do well and what you need
01:07:18
to work on so you're always clear on what you need to fix or what she wants you to do um and that Clarity means a
01:07:24
lot for us as players um so yeah uh I want to say I've got a really good relationship with her but um so much
01:07:35
respect for her and um the coach that she is I mean she's done amazing things
01:07:41
that um it's that still that respect and fear kind of thing you know yeah it's an
01:07:47
interesting interesting relationship and interesting relationship um from her perspective to the players as well like
01:07:52
when you've got someone like you who she's uh worked with and selected since
01:07:56
you were 25 and you're 30 now I mean if she's around long enough there's going
01:08:00
to you know eventually maybe become a time where she's going to make a hard decision about you 100% And um like but
01:08:07
that's the great environment that we have in our team as well we've got so
01:08:11
many young ones coming through and the coach at she is if you do the job and you do it really well you'll be out
01:08:17
there and you'll be selected um and for us as older players or more experienced
01:08:24
is rephrase by the way by I'm sitting here I'm [ __ ] 50 I'm old like you're
01:08:30
you're Sports old but you're still very young in life uh I keep telling myself
01:08:35
that um but yeah for our more experienced players we need those young ones nipping at our heels to make us
01:08:42
better players um just like when I first came in and Katrina um R was playing you
01:08:48
know she was the more experienced player and we were battling for that Bib and so
01:08:52
she was having to go hard because I was nipping at her heels whereas I had to go
01:08:57
hard because she had experience over me so um it's it's an exciting time to know
01:09:02
we've got so many young ones coming through and to have that competition is a good thing it's a it's hard but it's
01:09:08
really good yeah and now um the Birmingham Commonwealth Games last year um I know you were you were very excited
01:09:15
about this and then you had like a foot injury an ankle injury yeah my first big
01:09:20
injury um how long were you out for six months yeah so you missed the missed the
01:09:24
the Commonwealth Games and the the girls won uh bronze uh yes bronze yeah yeah um
01:09:30
yeah I how was that would take us back to the point of the injury I think I have a a an idea that
01:09:37
I'd been playing with it for the domestic season it just progressively got worse and worse um but I mean we
01:09:45
were doing the scans and the things we're doing the necessary things but nothing was showing up um but I was like
01:09:51
anti-inflammatories painkillers good to go um check some quarter Zone in there gosh um so yeah I it was our very last
01:10:02
game we didn't have a good season that year with the tactics um but our very
01:10:06
last game I remember was against the pulse at um Christ Church Arena went up for an intercept against T and I landed
01:10:15
really hard um and at that point uh the painkillers didn't want to work anymore
01:10:22
um so I was hobbling it was only 3 minutes left to go in the game I'm the kind of player unless you're going to
01:10:26
sub me off I'm not going off by my own um will so um coach wasn't calling it so
01:10:32
I was pretty much just hobbling for the three minutes on court um and then they put me because the selections were
01:10:38
coming up for com games and all that kind of stuff or com games are coming up they put me in a moon boot precautionary
01:10:45
and while they were doing all the tests and stuff um and I'd gone for my skin uh I was in the gym I was ready to
01:10:54
go that morning when I got the news I went to the gym was still my moon boot it was pretty much took it off to go do
01:10:59
some lifts and then I got a message from the physio that said um we got the scans
01:11:05
back and it doesn't look promising um but and and he immediately he was like
01:11:11
um yeah it looks like you might have a freter my brain refusing to accept it was like okay I might be out for a
01:11:20
couple of weeks this is it's all right I can do this it's fine so immediately put
01:11:24
my boot backck on and I ring him and I was like what does this mean two weeks three weeks what am I doing he was like
01:11:31
no this no this doesn't look like this is going to be an operation and I was
01:11:36
like whoa whoa whoa I after the games hold up hold up I've been playing with
01:11:41
painkillers for the last season I think I can stick it through I like if this is
01:11:45
on me because he was like it's a freter I was like this is if it's on me like if
01:11:49
I'm willing to take painkillers can I just stick it through can I just go really hard and he's like probably not
01:11:55
because it will eventually snap or whatever or like you know with noses always if you're not 100% you're adding
01:12:03
to the load of other players so I completely understood at that point that that just I wasn't going to be okay so
01:12:09
in other words it would have been like selfish for you to be playing because you're not playing to your potential yes
01:12:14
did you did you remind them that Richie mcco won the 2011 World Cup with a broken [ __ ] foot well the other thing
01:12:19
was that you know our trainings are really brutal and so so if you are nursing an injury you can't be in all
01:12:27
the trainings which mean you're adding to load with other players they're
01:12:30
having to make up for your load and trainings just so that you can play a game and that's unfair that's a good way
01:12:35
of looking at it I never thought about framing it that way but that's a great
01:12:38
way looking at it it's kind of it's almost more selfish in a way exactly so
01:12:42
I got that call um and he said well go to the doctors and just get the confirmation that that is what it is and
01:12:48
I was still saying in the drive over I was like no they had it wrong it's not
01:12:51
what it is but un fortunately the doctor told me yep you can see the little line
01:12:56
right there it's like the tiniest little fracture and the tiniest little bone in
01:13:00
my foot and I was like this is so stupid um but yeah I went back out after I got the news got in the car and I
01:13:06
immediately rang mom and I just bowed my eyes out I was like this is that H it was the worst um but I gave myself
01:13:15
myself a day or two to Sul about it and cry about it and I was like I need to get on with it it's not the end of the
01:13:21
world other people have had injuries it's fine um so I pretty much scheduled my surgery
01:13:27
for a couple weeks after that um went straight into surgery I was like Silver Lining at that point I hadn't seen my
01:13:32
family for about three or four years so I was like I'm booking a holiday to go
01:13:36
home so I got to go home and see my family it was hard um I I want to say I supported the girls
01:13:46
which I did in my heart I did but it was really hard to watch um so even any com
01:13:53
games so whenever at home um there was any like doesn't matter what sport it
01:13:59
was um I didn't want to be in the room when it was on the TV so I would just
01:14:03
leave and my family was massive supporter so they watched all the games and they um they got but annoyed at me
01:14:10
that I don't want to watch the games with them but I was like no you guys can
01:14:13
really watch but I'm going to go to my room like I I can't my heart hurting
01:14:18
yeah um I did end up watching their final game though their bronze game so so I master up the carriage I was like
01:14:25
no I need to at least watch this one for them so um yeah it it was an experience
01:14:31
that uh I know I need to take better care of my body after that it was six months I had a downtime I was like this
01:14:38
is a perfect opportunity for me to look at what I need to work on what I can do better um how to take care of my body
01:14:45
better so I enjoyed my six months off as bad as it was not going to com games I enjoyed it I learned a lot of about
01:14:53
myself did you what were the key takeaways you reckon um well gosh I think um smarter not harder harder is
01:15:03
not always the answer um and I think at that point uh it was I didn't like listening
01:15:13
to the doctors in the physios when they told me something because I was like no I can do this like don't tell me um
01:15:20
you're so determined but you know what it's um it's a it's a superpow in a way because
01:15:26
it's like this Dogg determination a cur because I mean that that's where I was
01:15:33
like no even if it's the smallest niggle I need to mention it because it can turn
01:15:37
into something big um and so need to take better care of my body need to acknowledge that doctors and physios
01:15:44
know more than I do so if they tell you not to do something you don't do it um
01:15:50
so that was a key learning and obviously harder is not always the answer you can
01:15:54
be smarter about it um but then life outside of nightball as well um you know when things are going well you don't
01:16:01
really want to change too much in the routines and things that you do but the six months that I had I was like perfect
01:16:07
opportunity to experiment a little bit so I experimented in my diet and how I did things as well and um I've been
01:16:15
lactose free for ages at that point for a few years um and then I decided to go gluten-free as well I had a grumbly
01:16:22
tummy for years and years and I just let it be um and then I went gluten-free and
01:16:27
it's been amazing um and challenge myself with no oh my gosh and my as well tell you I'm really really big Sweet
01:16:35
Tooth um she used to be my roomie and she always tells me I was the worst roomy to be amongst because I was so bad
01:16:42
with my Treats but I started challenging myself to stay away from treats as well
01:16:47
so and um the difference not necessarily that I just saw but felt in my body was
01:16:52
quite interesting and so I was interested in behind the science of food and why it did the the things that it
01:16:58
did and what it did so that's where my interest in nutrition started coming in
01:17:03
so I had a plan of what I wanted to do after eightball so it was a good six months yeah a lot of learnings that's
01:17:11
that's really awesome it's it's um I feel like you just have this natural
01:17:14
ability in any situation there is always a silver lining isn't there or there's
01:17:18
an upside um but sometimes it's very difficult to find or see that even if you search um very very hard but it
01:17:25
seems like you managed to find that with the Commonwealth Games situation relatively quickly that's the best way
01:17:31
to get out of your funk um is to try and see the good things in life um sometimes
01:17:38
it's a bit harder sometimes you need that support um and you need that somebody to pull you through uh but I
01:17:47
think you have to look at it like that otherwise you're just going to get stay
01:17:50
stuck in that mentality of you know the world is against me so no well good for you and do do you have like a sports
01:17:57
psychologist or anything in the team or yeah we do have a sports psychologist um
01:18:02
Rodney um yeah we we can use him we can utilize him again this is where in the past I was like I don't need that you
01:18:10
know I like why would I want to do that I'm happy I'm I'm good to go but it's um
01:18:17
learning skills about yourself and how to be a better athlete is quite good in that perspective so um yes we do have
01:18:25
somebody to help us to go to um which is quite nice we're quite fortunate I get
01:18:30
the feeling you don't have too much to do with Rodney did you lean on him during that um the Commonwealth Games
01:18:35
time or it was quite funny I was I was um I was laughing because when I heard the news this was the Friday I think I
01:18:43
heard the news and I told myself I'm going to give myself the weekend to sulk
01:18:49
but I got in touch because they were like we think it's important that you do
01:18:52
get in touch with Rod so I messaged rod and I was like Rod I need to talk to you um but I'm taking
01:18:59
this weekend for myself um at that point I thought he'd knew like you know because when like they've got the
01:19:06
structure up there so they tend to share that you know this person's out or whatever so I thought he knew about my
01:19:11
injury and so the Monday when we scheduled the Skype or the Microsoft or teams meeting whatever um he was like
01:19:20
right Karen what what's going on and he hadn't heard about my injury so he
01:19:26
thought I was going through like this massive life crisis and I was like depressed and like going through this
01:19:32
massive ordeal and he was like ready he's like I had my books ready I had my
01:19:36
questions ready I was like Rod I'm I'm just injured I'm just not going to com
01:19:39
games and he's like oh okay I thought you were going through it and I was like
01:19:43
no no no it's just you know I'm I'm having to deal with this now and I've
01:19:47
never dealt with this before I don't know I don't you you shouldn't be down
01:19:51
playing this though this is a this is a big piece of adversity you went through yeah um I I think that's um a good and a
01:19:59
bad thing about me um is that whether I had success or a tough time I don't necessarily acknowledge it for what it
01:20:07
is I like I'm not great with the touchy feely kind of stuff and I think that's
01:20:15
why also i' Rod knows this that's why I also avoid him because I don't like
01:20:20
getting into that touchy Fey stuff and I hate crying in front of people even though like I do I can cry easily if I
01:20:28
am emotional I hate crying in front of people do you why is that I don't know I
01:20:33
don't know whether it's a vulnerable thing or vulnerability is um yeah I used
01:20:39
to be I used to have massive massive walls up and I've um been trying to get
01:20:43
better the last few years to sort of like tear them down a little bit because I know like vulnerability is like
01:20:47
another sort of superpower are you um yeah I get the feeling you've got walls
01:20:52
up um do you or is that unfair prob no no that's probably a that's probably fair I
01:20:59
think uh my circle is quite small um and I can mention with my time um who I give
01:21:06
my time to um is limited um you got [ __ ] to do I do I do um but also um I do like I trust people
01:21:18
until you give me reason not to um but when it comes to my personal tight-knit thing it yeah I don't have many people
01:21:26
that I have that close to me um so yeah I I guess I do have walls but once once you're in you're in you're in you're in
01:21:34
that inner circle geez I feel like it be a it's a it's a a long way borrowing to
01:21:39
get into that in a circle though wasn't it seems like you you've mentioned your
01:21:42
family a few times like you're really close to them so I'm guessing they and
01:21:44
you're in a circle but that I mean um your technolog is good with teams and zoom and FaceTime and whatever but it's
01:21:51
that's still a long way away yeah um and I think recently in the last few years it's gotten more real about not
01:22:02
having that support system immediate support system around me um but I try not like I don't want that
01:22:11
to be the reason for me to suddenly start looking for you know a significant other or trying to I think I was quite
01:22:18
social I tried to be quite social at the start or earlier in this year and it drained me so much cuz I was like I need
01:22:24
more people around me I need to build my you know my circle but it drained me so
01:22:30
much and it it actually was to my detriment and I was like I don't need this I'm happy with myself um and but it
01:22:39
does it does get lonely it really does get lonely sometimes um but it's it's
01:22:46
not forever and I know I've got the right people around me when I need them um so
01:22:53
yeah yeah good for you and how's your how's your mental health been over the
01:22:56
years has it been pretty good mostly good well yes again like I try you're not just sweeping everything under the
01:23:03
rug Rod might tell you I do sometimes Rod wouldn't no you've only had two meetings with them in five years
01:23:11
avoidance avoidance avoidance is key yeah no um now you seem pretty good like the I mean this is the first time we've
01:23:19
met and we've been chatting for like an hour or 20 now and you just I get the
01:23:23
the definite impression of someone that's um just relentlessly optimistic and positive and glass half full I think
01:23:30
I'm fortunate to have the ability to most of the time 90% of the time when I
01:23:37
don't When Something's Happened to me that I don't like or it's a bad if I
01:23:41
can't do anything about it I just switch off from it I like I can't do anything
01:23:45
about it there's no point of stressing about it so I'm fortunate enough to have
01:23:49
that ability to just switch it off and be like no I'm not not going to worry
01:23:53
myself about that and so that keeps me in a good positive mindset but um it's
01:23:58
not always like that it definitely isn't yeah that's a good way to approach
01:24:01
things though because you everyone will tell you don't worry about the things
01:24:04
that are out of your control but it's easier said than done isn't it 100% And
01:24:08
I think I'm sometimes guilty of that because I've got like a a sister that is
01:24:14
very much a worry wart like she takes on the world's problems um and so she's
01:24:20
just like this mess of mother at heart and so she is very big on worrying and like caring for others and so my advice
01:24:28
to her would always be like why like why are you doing this so but that's her
01:24:32
personality and that is who she is so it's so much harder for someone like that to just be able to switch off um so
01:24:38
that's why I said at the start I'm fortunate to have that ability to be able to do that but it can be at a
01:24:45
detriment to myself sometimes as well because sometimes you do need to feel those things and you do need to work
01:24:51
through them and not pile them up so yeah working on that aspect of it I feel like you're always gonna have something
01:24:59
that you're that you're working on you have to it's that constant Improvement trying to be a better person
01:25:04
every day you have to yeah yeah oh it's inspiring it's inspiring and what what's
01:25:08
your inner voice like are you mostly kind to yourself because I I know if you're um I I don't know I've probably
01:25:14
over the years had um sort of like a perfectionism complex and it's like it's
01:25:19
it sounds it can be a good thing but it can also be a bad as well yeah you most mostly kind to yourself or you quite
01:25:25
hard on yourself I think probably more leaning towards being hard on myself but I think that is expected of a person
01:25:33
like high performing athletes that's the mentality that we have as well that
01:25:38
doesn't matter how good you are you can always be better um and so um that's
01:25:44
where I have to say in the last couple of years my specifically my sister but also my mom have come in to play really
01:25:51
well and reminding me that what I've have done and how far I have come and how good I am um because I'm
01:26:00
always uh downplaying things that I do um and I I started this uh or I try um Jay galard he started this itang concept
01:26:13
about tall poppy syndrome and that um we're too humble sometimes and I come from a history of
01:26:22
I hate Cockiness and arrogance I cannot stand it um and but it's that fine line
01:26:29
of acknowledging when you are doing well and being proud of yourself and celebrating that and so that's what I'm
01:26:35
trying to work on myself a little bit more is celebrating myself and being proud of myself a little bit more rather
01:26:41
than always like downplaying or being harsh on myself and my sister's been really good that voice in the background
01:26:47
for me because I know they'll be very open and honest with me when I'm not
01:26:50
doing something well when I need to do to be better so coming from them that support and be like no you are doing
01:26:56
really well don't be so down on yourself is quite good yeah and I think I think
01:27:00
there's a difference between being um being proud of yourself and being able
01:27:03
to acknowledge what you've done and thinking that your [ __ ] doesn't stink
01:27:06
you know what I mean is um toal puppy a big thing in South Africa as well it's a
01:27:10
massive thing here in newon no I don't think so yeah well not that I would say
01:27:15
it is no um I think that it's pretty much a thing here but I love that about New Zealand as well I
01:27:24
love the humble side um it's just having that fine line of being humble but celebrating the good things as well and
01:27:35
I think that's where that's where I would like to see it go is that we do
01:27:39
celebrate and not just um ourselves but each other and I think that's more important because if you get that
01:27:45
celebration from others you're more inclined to do it for yourself too yeah you don't want to be that person and be
01:27:51
like Oh I'm I'm so good or I'm doing this but when the people around you are
01:27:55
doing it for you you be like oh yeah maybe I am doing well you are you are and I feel like today of all days is um
01:28:02
is a time where you should pause and reflect on what you've done I mean you just finished the series against
01:28:07
Australia you've played 50 games for New Zealand um and the road that you took to
01:28:11
get here it's um it's incredible it's a hell of a journey thank you so you you
01:28:16
do deserve to pet yourself on the bo yeah we had um Wendy Fu who is an amazing um player down in the South
01:28:23
Island um Southland she um she got 15 minutes out on court um in the black dress um and she came into our camp
01:28:33
before our inago game um because we're trying to connect with our player past
01:28:38
players uh and she had a chat about how she wished it could have been more and how she relished the few minutes that
01:28:46
she had out on Court and so when you hear something like that it just reminds you that you know it's every second out
01:28:55
there every moment in that black dress is a absolute privilege and an honor and you need to relish that moment for as
01:29:01
long as you can because you don't know how long it's going to last so I think
01:29:05
after having that chat with her and now being able to celebrate my 50 games yeah it it's hard when it's about
01:29:13
me when I'm celebrating other people's 50th I'm was like this is amazing you've
01:29:17
played so many games but when it's about me it's like gosh you just can't believe
01:29:22
almost so it's hard to celebrate it's really cool and I've heard you reference
01:29:26
the black dress um a few times of the same way that the old blacks mentioned the black Jersey do you get like um a
01:29:33
new black dress each game we um get a new one every year so our year runs um August till September um so you pretty
01:29:43
much get a new allocation whenever you get selected in the squad you get your two dresses um two dresses a year two
01:29:50
dresses a year so you don't we wash it we wash it every night and we don't put
01:29:56
it in the washing machine either no no you hand wash it in your bathroom and then you ring it dry and then you yeah
01:30:04
is that out of necessity because you have to you we've only got two dresses so if it goes out in the wash and it
01:30:10
doesn't come back or the washing machine does something to it you know whatever
01:30:14
if it goes missing it's yeah you're screwed yeah yeah so um yeah we have to
01:30:18
take very good care of our two dresses cuz the old blacks get like a they they get um a jersey presented before each
01:30:25
game and it's got like black black embroidery with um who they're playing
01:30:29
in the date and stuff really really so from your five years you've got like 10
01:30:33
dresses yeah yeah pretty much yeah oh well actually correction for Pinnacle events there'll be a separate dress for
01:30:42
a pinnacle event so for com games you would have had your allocation for the year but com games had its specific
01:30:48
dress and World Cup had its specific dress so every now and then you get four dresses the year um but I mean it just
01:30:56
makes that dress for me not that obviously the old black JY won't be more special but it makes that physical dress
01:31:03
so much more special because I know all my games all my Blood Sweat and Tears was in that specific dress so handing
01:31:11
what I do with that dress means so much more to me um yeah that's cool what what what do you
01:31:18
think you'll do with them at the end of your career I've you seem so humble I
01:31:21
can't imagine you ever framing them and having them in a oh yeah well so I've
01:31:26
held on to one dress and then one um if I had someone really special to me that year that meant a lot for me
01:31:35
um I would give that dress to that special person so I've held on to at least one of each allocation same with
01:31:40
my franchise dresses I've got so many of them as well um and we after our last
01:31:48
World Cup uh Gina krton and T sby Ricket they um um had a contact in the South Island they had this massive frame um
01:31:55
and they framed their dresses and with big collage of photos of themselves playing and the metal looks
01:32:03
amazing um and as amazing as it looks I was like what am I going to do with this
01:32:08
like I don't want to put it up in my house like but then I thought about it okay it's cool though I know so I've
01:32:15
thought about it and I think um one day when I have my own big house I want my own Little Gym setup my room with my gym
01:32:25
set up and um I will frame uh I don't know if I can frame all of them because there'll be too many of
01:32:31
them but I'll frame my key ones and I'll try and put them up and that will be my
01:32:35
memorabilia gym SL JY workout room so hopefully that's the plan one day with
01:32:41
them yeah I like it oh that's a good plan um and you turned 30 in April this
01:32:45
year which is a a big milestone birthday um yes how yeah how how did that make you feel because it's um as we touched
01:32:53
upon before on the bigest scheme of life you're still very very young yeah I know
01:32:57
actually apparently I'm 24 because my sister's got this mentality right she's
01:33:00
a year older than me she's got this mentality if you tell yourself you're a
01:33:05
certain age that's the age that you are so she keeps telling herself she's 25
01:33:10
and so back when I was home the last time I was like oh guys no I can't do it
01:33:15
like I'm 30 and she's like you can't be 30 I'm 25 so that means you're
01:33:20
24 um but no I um it's a good way to look at it but your ankle disagrees I know I know um no you're only as old as
01:33:29
you feel and what you make of it so um yeah I have to remind myself sometimes that I'm 30 definitely
01:33:38
definitely believable that you're 24 aren't you aren't you busy doing Tik
01:33:41
toks like pregame uh yeah it's just a bit of fun you know you sometimes I cringe in
01:33:49
myself watching that but it's out of your comfort zone you have to do some fun stuff sometimes so um it takes your
01:33:56
mind off the seriousness exactly and um I guess with I don't know my young personality sometimes I've got heaps of
01:34:05
friends my age and then I've also got heaps of like young young young friends
01:34:09
as well um so depending on my vibe the day depends on who I hang out with as well so um yeah I don't necessarily feel
01:34:19
dirty sometimes I like go gosh I can't believe I am um but I just try and remind myself like I've got so many more
01:34:27
years ahead of me and just because I'm 30 like who cares yeah and I'll tell you
01:34:32
something you from um the perspective of being 50 now um You you I I still feel young in my mind like you you still feel
01:34:41
young in your mind your mind doesn't really sort of age necessarily like you
01:34:44
evolve and you change of course but your mind doesn't really change and I feel
01:34:47
like yeah if you put that out there like that aura of like I'm young young and
01:34:51
I'm still like you know people like a lot of people don't believe I'm 30 until
01:34:56
I tell them I'm 30 so again it's as you're as old as you feel and why like
01:35:02
why does age matter anyway you know it's what you do with it yeah but I suppose
01:35:07
from a like a a high performance sporting pers perspective you you must be aware that you're probably closer to
01:35:12
the end than the start yes which is like sad yeah is it yeah cuz I'm like I know
01:35:19
I've been in it for like five years is but I also feel like I just started the
01:35:24
other day and I know how quickly time goes by so um bodywise I feel like I want to push for
01:35:33
another world cup which is four years away um I wouldn't want to finish but depending on how the body and I would
01:35:41
want to go out on my own terms as well so um definitely aiming for another four years and knowing how quickly time goes
01:35:48
by I want to try and enjoy it as much as I can um so but hopefully the body can hold out longer who knows yeah would
01:35:55
that be the dream four more years and then finish on your own terms at 34 chapter closed well it depends on what
01:36:01
goes on on my life outside you know um we've got like a few Ms and the team who' probably have a different
01:36:08
perspective of what netball looks like for them um and then you get young ones who' got no idea you know very much
01:36:15
starting their Journey so I think for me I've made Nick ball my priority for so
01:36:21
long I know I need to start focusing on life outside of netball a little bit more and
01:36:26
so I can't make those calls just yet at the moment in terms of performance I
01:36:30
want to push for another four years you never know I might get to 34 still be single still only have netball so I
01:36:36
might want to push for longer or at that point I might have a partner I might want to settle down so you never know
01:36:42
yeah do do do you want to find a partner or do you think you're quite happy on
01:36:45
your own I feel like Society puts a lot of pressure on people especially when you get to a certain age that you should
01:36:49
have a partner um you did mention before just in passing that you're lonely sometimes there's nothing wrong with I
01:36:55
don't think with being alone but being lonely is not great yeah um yeah uh it's very it's not very often
01:37:03
that I do feel lonely I think the only times I do would probably be when you want that that person or that like IM
01:37:12
like that hug or that person to go to or just that that comfort that you don't
01:37:16
necessarily have because I don't have my immediate family around me or you know
01:37:20
when you go to events you don't have that plus one to go with um so there's very few times that I do
01:37:28
feel lonely and so I'm not willing to offer up uh or yeah I'm want I'm wanting the right
01:37:37
person in the right time I'm not willing to offer up my time and unnecessary
01:37:42
effort um for those few moments that I feel lonely if if you if you go out with someone how how long do you give it
01:37:50
before you know like before you know if there's a spark there or not uh I'm a
01:37:54
feeling person um like obviously have to be attracted to some degree to that person but I'm very much a feeling
01:38:03
person um and I can I can probably tell within the first few dates um whether I can see it going anywhere um but I
01:38:14
always try and give things the benefit of the doubt and I try and you know see where it goes um so yeah I think feeling
01:38:24
wise because I'm a feeling person quite quickly first few dayses that's quite
01:38:27
generous I thought I expected you to say like first few minutes almost like it seems like you're you're a lady that
01:38:34
doesn't want to waste a minute of time that you got yeah but I'm also um uh like that benefit of Doubt kind of
01:38:42
thing like the person I am when you first meet me might not necessarily be the true meet because you know you might
01:38:48
be nervous or was something going on or whatever so do try and give it actually that time and effort because you don't
01:38:56
want to be like n n n and dismiss it too quickly something yeah so I'm also like give it the time that it needs
01:39:05
and just like just like Dame noan gave you the time you need after your first test exactly bad first impression but
01:39:12
you you came good yeah exactly and like I mean who knows I know nothing about like you know love and that kind of
01:39:20
stuff I'm like some people say it's love at first sight others say it's something you develop
01:39:25
and you build into I'm like who knows I think everybody's different so I'm just
01:39:30
winging it yeah are you are you religious I am yes I grew up Christian so got those values behind me as well
01:39:39
um but yeah and I think that's also shaped me into the person I am as well the way I think and the way I do things
01:39:47
as well um but I know there's a wide world out there and I I I definitely don't judge I'm not you know you do you
01:39:55
I'll do me happy with that kind of thing you know so as long as I get along with
01:39:59
you and I you know connect with you that's what what's important to me when
01:40:03
I like build friendships or relationships so um but yeah very big growing up that was a big aspect of my
01:40:10
life and and shaped me in the in my values and morals and and how I think about things yeah and now you live in a
01:40:16
city called Christ's Church yeah a more religious sounding place oh it's cool oh no I wondered
01:40:25
because I've read a few interviews with you and you you use some phras phrases
01:40:28
like um Bliss quite a bit and um you you talk about your Creator and stuff so I thought and you just seem like a good a
01:40:36
good person as well so I thought maybe there's some religious backing there yeah yeah um but like also acknowledging
01:40:43
you know um there's a lot of other people that that NE aren't necessarily
01:40:48
and I think when you are like yes I'm religious people can be like oh like are
01:40:52
you judgy all that kind of stuff don't don't try and RAM it down my throat yeah
01:40:56
yeah so I think I'm very big on that like that's not my role to do at all um
01:41:02
it's fine for you yeah that's cool and could you could you date someone shorter
01:41:06
than you I'm asking for a couple of friends who may not be as what's your height your 12 um incen
01:41:14
is 184 yeah so um I actually I went on a few dates with a with a guy that was shorter than me
01:41:25
and um beautiful guy like gentleman absolutely green flags like lovely um and we still joke about it because
01:41:34
we're still in touch like just because it didn't work out doesn't mean like I
01:41:37
still enjoy company yeah um and we still joke about it but I'm like it's nothing
01:41:44
to do with the person and I think that's sometimes hard to explain to them I am
01:41:51
tall so I come across big and I like feeling small and I I would like to feel small so um it's probably more so a
01:42:01
personal um is issue I'm dealing with that I'd probably want my partner to be
01:42:07
taller than me yes are are you quite self-conscious of your height no no I'm
01:42:12
not um used to be at school I hated it I also used to never yeah I never wore heels um um oh my gosh I like my
01:42:22
wardrobe is full of heels now I don't care I wear heels ever like platforms I'm always wearing platform shoes um no
01:42:30
not anymore I I love my height now I absolutely enjoy it um a lot hard of finding a guy that's taller than me
01:42:38
though especially when I love wearing heels but again it's I know if the right
01:42:44
person comes along and I have th that feeling towards them and they happen to be shorter than me oh cross that bridge
01:42:51
when we get there you need to you need to start hanging out at breaker's training
01:42:55
camp gosh oh I know Ron's always like you need to find yourself an athlete and
01:43:00
I was like well yes and no I'm sure there's tall people that's not athletes
01:43:05
yeah hey well I'm really excited to see what the future um brings for you and
01:43:08
I'm really excited to hear that your goal is to keep playing for as long as your body allows because you've got so
01:43:14
much to give and I can't thank you enough for coming over today the morning after your 50th game for the silver F
01:43:20
it's been great to finally meet you oh gosh back to normal life you know thank
01:43:23
you so much for having me I always love having a bit of a chat and um because when you have these kind of discussions
01:43:30
with people sometimes you realize or notice things about yourself you didn't
01:43:35
before because people tend to ask you questions you might not have thought about or have voiced out in the open so
01:43:41
um I love having these chats you learned so much about yourself as well has has there been anything that you can think
01:43:46
of from this chat or is it sort of like on the flight home later today that you're probably on the flight
01:43:51
yeah I'll be thinking what I like did I make myself look really stupid oh no absolutely not absolutely
01:44:01
not if in these conversations if anyone's going to make themselves look stupid it's likely to be me oh god um I
01:44:06
always go into these chats um assuming I'm the dumbest person in the room and
01:44:10
it's uh I think it's a good way to go about it um Karen burer you are a great
01:44:14
New Zealander oh thank you can I can we call you a New Zealander you're newand I
01:44:19
yeah like 12 years you know I've pretty much that's why I'm always saying I'm
01:44:23
going home wherever I'm going I'm going home so I'm fortunate um and blessed to
01:44:28
have so many homes um so I definitely call New Zealand home as well yeah yeah cool hey best of luck for the future
01:44:35
awesome thank [Music] you