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and now I get to meet you know I meet people like you Dom we've never met so
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what I really cherish is meaning like-minded Souls who are happy to talk about these very crunchy things so other
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people out there in the world who don't have the words or the courage yet can
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breathe a sigh of relief and go okay maybe I can get to that stage I'm just right down here at the moment struggling
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yeah so I appreciate you brother that's what I'm trying to say I I appreciate
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you too and as I was saying before from doing this podast C you realize that everyone's carrying a bag of [ __ ] it's
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just how big that bag of [ __ ] is and um and I'd like to think people can go can
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can hear your story and go okay well he got through that I can get through this relationship breakup job loss you know
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this guilt that I've got for whatever it happens to be absolutely and and if I
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could just give I just try and drop real simple gems for people I was like you didn't choose the hurt but you can
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choose to heal cuz we get stuck in here yeah well that's it can't change
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anything well I was like well you're not a tree bro you can move so um I was like
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oh I can move too I can move to help but it's just trying to it's easier said
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than done when you're when you're in that fight or flight all the time and
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you're it's like you're literally walking through a storm that no one can
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see yeah when do you start to come right how long is it so July 2009 yesterday oh I'm sorry I understand
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you're still a work in progress if you're if you're um suffer from mental
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illness it's it's never going to fully go away and it's a constant on um but
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when did you start to feel like your your old self again or your new self again well it's interesting because you
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as you're healing you have to change your ways because can't physically do
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this can't physically do that mentally it's hard because your body's not
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working you have to evolve and now as I got better physically I started to go back to my old dumb ways like let's have
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some beers let's get on it and I mentally started to fall down again I went what's wrong I'm back I'm like I'm
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feeling fit again what's wrong with me it's like oh you idiot you can't go back
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to the old ways now in my Evolution and anyone's healing Evolution you have to
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keep moving forward if you try to go backwards you're going to sink back down
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to where you were yeah and that's that happened to me a few times that's okay I
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mean I was I was with with good people but when I realized that I was like oh [ __ ] this is not good for my mental
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health I share this with everybody I've got a tight three three people that I
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trust with my life I can text or call anytime night or day and I encourage other people to get a tight three
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because it's too much for one person to hold and the good thing about my tight
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threats grow to five people that I trust in my life um is that if you're swirling
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that person there to help you and if you're the person helping the one swirling and it's too much for you you
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call in the other people so you're you're putting a circle of UT heart and
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hope around that one person and the three of you or five of you can navigate it better than one so it's basically to
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even the load I think that's a good idea as a formal sort of I mean you hear
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about people that go to Alcoholics Anonymous and they have a sponsor you know someone they can call anytime day
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or night but we don't do that for mental health do we and um and but everyone
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says everyone says like if you're ever feeling down you give me a call day or
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night but it's feels like it's just lip service yeah and that's why I've taken
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this I took it that step to go I'm going to nominate these people and formalize
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it and formalize it and you know it's okay if they go oh actually it's it's a
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bit too much for me bro go okay thanks now I know uh this person over here this another person so you just build and
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I've heard people say I don't have a tight I don't have a tight one in my
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circle and I've actually said to them sounds like your circle is crap um if you can't ask one person in your circle
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to be you know a guardian a kitak you better change a circle bro cuz that means you it's not a safe place to be I
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like that so when did the when did the decision come to tour it and do shop bro as I said at the beginning I I watched
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this on YouTube last night and anyone can watch it um it's it's a hard watch
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and after watching it last night I thought you know it must be exhausting for you to even come over here today and
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like chat about this for an hour no no no this is my every day because it's not
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heavy for me it's not it's not heavy for me it was heavy for me it's light for me
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do I still have shed some tears about it sometimes yeah but it's nowhere near as
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heavy as it's ever been for me I'm at probably the best shape mentally physically spiritually that I've ever
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been at but I know that I got to keep working on it I can't just stop like going on cruise mode because I'll start
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to slip backwards I've actually the thing about prevention is you've got to
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be actually putting into action you got to be actioning it's great to have all
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these tools but if you're not practicing any of these tools daily then it's just
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great thoughts and ideas oh yeah and then when when the [ __ ] hits the fan and you go and grab the tool you don't
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actually use it before you're like oh well I dropped it oh oh grab the other
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one oh dropped it too oh God and all of a sudden you've got had a great you think you've got these great tools which
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you've never practiced using and I had to figure out that the hard way bro that
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happened to me so many times yeah yeah that's great that's a great one that's a
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great one and then when the [ __ ] the fan they'd all fall out on the floor and I
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got I was lost again yeah but that's the thing I mean the easiest time to do the
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work is when you don't need it eh but it's like I mean who does that you know
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what I it's like I don't need it I'm all good totally until you're not and that's
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what I I used to do that all the time but now I've had to use these tools and
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I encourage other people to use whatever tools you need cuz we're all same same
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but different and you might need a little different variation of this so figure out what you need and when you're
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swirling in that storm of suici a suicide audiation and you're brave enough to go bro I'm spinning out I need
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help right now the best advice I've ever got and it's from my first cousin Clint
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Edmunds he said to me on the phone what do you need cousin cuz you could hear that I was distressed and I'd never
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everybody have ever heard anyone ask me what I need and I realized why cuz I never told anybody I've been suicidal so
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to have somebody actually listen without judgment not go oh man we we better medicate you or jeez we better call the
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cops or call the ambulance it's like there's no Panic the person who I trust
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in my life number one on my dining list is my cousin just asking me what I need and what I really like about that is it
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puts the ball back in that person's Court to figure out what do I need because no one's ever asked me do I need
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to cry do I need to go to the gym do I need to hit the punching bag go to the ocean I don't know but at least now
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someone's put it in your court to ask what you need so it's actually having to
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build the capacity getting the person to build it for themselves but giving them
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a platform to to work off