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[Music] kiwi's Love at First like Finn we're making [Music] waves generate switch online
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[Music] today Theo Pratt welcome to my podcast hello good to be back yeah cuz I um I
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had your friend uh Rosie Overcomer on the podcast Maybe a year ago and you were sitting in the room at the time
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yeah and um finally now we we connect why now well my books out now and it's
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going to be good sharing my story and just getting my voice out there yeah for those of you watching this podcast
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rather than listening I'm holding a copy of the this is your first copy of the
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book yeah yeah um unveiled a story of surviving Glory of Al by theop Pratt are you happy with it yeah yeah pretty proud
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of it yeah um was it a cathartic experience was it a painful experience it was a cathartic experience but it
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also like through it I found out like more things about my childhood and like got more stories out of my mom um from
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it which was I guess very could it was overwhelming at times but no overall it was good I so
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your mom played a played a hand in this played a part in this yeah I think I wanted to get her I guess side of it as
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well and talk about how she joined glor Val and what led her to that yeah okay well um first of all can I say because
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I've done quite a bit of research for this and we've got a lot of ground a lot
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of ground to cover while you're here um but yeah I wanted to know about the status of your relationship with your
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mom because the last time I guess it's not the last time I saw you but I thought the last time you maybe saw her
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would have been in 2016 uh when she dropped you off at the bus stop and um this is you leaving gloryia of Val and
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she said to you you're going to you're basically going to rot in hell yeah um
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but you've sort of rekindled and reconnected since then yeah I think um since then we have over time um a lot of
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that is from me um reporting a lot of the abuse I experienced in there to the police and then from that that sort
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of um opened up our relationship because she didn't wasn't aware of a lot of it
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um but yeah it's been a journey like my sister who's been out for 3 years um her
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coming out sort of opened up my mom's relationship and then police being involved and her being able to get a
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phone in there has sort of led to us having communication yeah my God there's
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a lot to talk about yeah um yeah I've put quite a bit of thought into this into how we structure it because um it's
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quite a complex story yeah um there were a lot of people on Instagram that um posted questions for me to ask you and
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um a a lot of those um I don't know I suppose kind of trivial on the big scheme of things or like Curious you
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know like music related pop culture related about you know the outside world versus glor of so I thought maybe we'll
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um we'll get them done first yeah and then we'll unpack um some of your story
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yeah that might be the best way to first of all um uh a lot of people might remember you from um uh the glory ofil
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documentary escaping Utopia which was on TV and Z last year can you remember what
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your famous line was oh what is it um don't know who Taylor Swift is but I know how to make
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cheese yeah yeah I know um word for word it's I know how to make cheese but I
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don't know who Taylor Swift is do you know who Taylor Swift is now oh 100% what do you like more what do you like
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more cheese or Taylor oh I think Taylor really just a little bit I'm I'm
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a Swifty but I love cheese as well if I had to pick one for the rest of my life I'd probably go with cheese um yeah so
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so you've got the book out as well and you're also um the first from Glory V to
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earn a degree yeah yeah there's been a couple more now but um yeah getting my
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degree is probably the best thing I've done since leaving yeah yeah and another
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um like reference point because the the documentary came out a while ago on TV and said it was like over a year ago uh
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you're you're the one that's got a sister in India called precious um who's
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been there since 2012 and uh this was another quote more serious one from the documentary my goal is I will not let
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her be forgotten yeah yeah and and you're sticking to that 100% yeah I've
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got this tattoo on my arm um which is a drawing that my nephews did in India um which is just like my reminder that yeah
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I'm not going to give up and going to find a way to get her back to New Zealand and the other women and their
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children fantastic okay more on that later uh first of all the Instagram stuff someone said um uh if if you were
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writing like an outside Survival Guide for people leaving Glory of Ale like what would be some of the key things in
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it you know so like an instruction instruction menu so they drop you off at the the bus stop they tell you you're
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going to spend the rest of your life burning in hell um what would have been helpful information to
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have um I think more like money management and then just like social skills knowing like how to introduce
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yourself and that sort of things just how they have a conversation with someone what do you
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mean and Le you you only had conversations with people you've ever like grown up with and you've NE you
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don't introduce yourself to anyone or say hello or things like that and like
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and MoneyWise I only had ever seen a $5 note before leaving I didn't know what
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$200 meant in the scheme of things um and knowing how to go to the supermarket and things like that like choosing what
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to have for dinner like that sort of thing is probably just the really everyday life sort of
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stuff does it take you long uh once you leave Glory of able to get you hit around that
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stuff I mean you learn the hard way for a lot of it like it's trial and error um
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but I think just a lot of it comes down to being able to make choices and if you
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can learn that skill then you sort of everything El becomes easier yeah there's there's some stuff in the book
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that um you only s it to me yesterday so I haven't read the whole thing I've just
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hit a flick through but some of it's um I mean yeah sort of touches your heart
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it's kind of cute in a way it's like you leave Glory Vil they give you $200 and
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you think you're rich you get to you realize oh okay $200 ain't going to get
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me f pretty much yeah I love that uh someone else said um uh what are the most positive and most negative things
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you learned from growing up in Glory of um anything good about it probably more like the life skills
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stuff but then also just I think my favorite thing in glor was like being a child and being in nature and like the
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bush walks and like that's part of it um like I don't think I would have gotten
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through my childhood if I didn't have the nature around me to like disappear
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into the bush for a few hours and um that's probably the best thing and the thing I miss most about like the West
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Coast M yeah that's quite telling a so it's more like um scenery based really than
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anything else yeah yeah definitely and when you disappeared in the bush for a few hours what was that for like just to
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process thoughts or yeah process thoughts and like I did a lot of writing and reading um and just sleeping as well
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like you couldn't and just a peace like I moment just to realize I don't know like process
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things and hide from the meetings on Sunday um yes thanks J uh from Instagram uh what
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did Theo know about the outside world that it was a bad evil place and that everyone was going to hell um that
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was pretty much it is she still religious I believe m in higher power I believe in like the universe and the
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environment and connecting to nature but that's about it so if there was not
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religion so there was a scale and there was like um religious agnostic atheist where would you be some probably in the
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middle yeah yeah okay um within Glory of vale uh what do people say about those that have
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left when you're in there and someone leaves like is it does everyone sort of
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gossip about them does everyone talk about them do they pray for them um like the word goes around that people have
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left and it's like they've damned their souls to hell and they didn't have like
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faith in God and they didn't trust the leaders and pretty much you just think
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that they've gone like they've disappeared like I remember when my best friend when I was a 11 her whole family
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just disappeared and you just think that she's gone to hell and that's all
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and that's that and then like they have burnings like when I was younger that you'd have
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to burn um any like thing you had like photos or anything to do with them like your their names can't really be
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mentioned again that like it's like they never existed that's terrifying yeah yeah so
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you're not aware that it's that it's happening so your friends don't say Hey
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you in the next couple of days I'm going to be leaving not always no you don't
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tell any one cuz then you could be stopped how did you know it was the right decision to
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leave I knew from like the age of 14 that I had to get out of there but I think when I got to 18 it was just like
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a lot of questioning and then I pretty much got told I had to sign the commitment or leave so that was sort of
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was the last thing last straw yeah again these are the questions from Instagram we're just scratching the surface on
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some of the stuff and we'll get into that in in more detail when we get through these um some of the some of
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these are quite serious but some of them are quite trivial so once we get through
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these we'll go through your story in sort of a more chronological order um who decides the baby names the mothers
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get to say what's your name honey my name yeah was honey faithful yeah um parents choose them but they have to be
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biblical and then they have to run them past the leaders first so where did um theophila come
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from a pre um when I was 16 I changed my name in glova um and it had to still be
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religious so I came up with the um I came from a cow to be honest you mean I was illegally milking
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cows with my cousins down at deir and one of the cows names was theop and then I just remembered that when I was going
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to change my name right honey Faithful is a great name it sounds like it could be a pop st sounds like could be a Stu's
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name st's name I wouldn't know about that sort ofil it didn't it didn't work
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I mean having that sort of name in there all the guys just head on you and like I
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don't know it was just like a mocking thing in terms of like woman and having
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that name it was like confusing and like a lot of bullying related to it yeah by
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me and like boys my age yeah what is the uh typical day for a glory ofil woman or for you I suppose
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like a young woman like like a teenage girl yep probably waking up at 4:30 to 5 and either going to work on one of the
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teams so it could be going to make the breed for the community so like 100 Loaves and then going to
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school finishing at like 2:30 back to work and then finishing maybe at 700 at night yeah starting
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again seems to be a life with like very little Joy it's feels like it's a life
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with um sort of like purpose and structure and discipline but maybe very little Joy no joy and no like moment to
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like have a laugh or have a conversation with a person next to you it's like just
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go go go cuz if you have a moment to think then you might start questioning you do you yeah within none
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of those moments that you can like even snapshots where like you're having a
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laugh or a happy moment with there's a few moment but a lot of like of and moments of
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things that could get you in trouble so like running away and like going into the bush and like that sort of thing but
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it was always on terms that it was against the rules Yeah you mentioned mentioned
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before that you were um illegally milking um theophila the cow what what happens when you when you
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break the law of Glory of a you'll end up in a a Shepherds and servants meeting
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on a Sunday afternoon and questioned and like you'll get be sent her into a room
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with like 12 of the leaders and questioned for a few hours for a few hours yeah and the leaders are all are
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all mean yeah all mean and sitting around in a circle and your sent what sort of age oh 40s to 70s right so
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you're 13 14 15 16 year old girl yeah and like are they raising their voices or oh 100% like raising your
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voices just all they all take turns at like screaming at you or yelling questioning you and you just sit there
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and wait for it to end and then you have to sort of come to an agreement at the end that you're going to do something to
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to show that you're going to submit to them so it could be apologizing or it
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could be you get put out like I was put out a couple of times um what does that mean could mean a range of things but
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when I got put out I was sent to work in the sewing room every day when I was 15
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and like I wasn't allowed to talk to any girls my age and not allowed to tend
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things that everyone else attended so just went to the sewing room every day sewed then went
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home yeah so so when you're in when you're in when you're in trouble when you when you
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break the law yeah break is in milking a cow say that happens on a Wednesday um are you just
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waiting until Sunday for the disciplinary sometimes you're like oh is it going to
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happen or sometimes if it's serious you'll get called into like a meeting
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that night so like if someone from the outside that's left comes in and you're seen talking to
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them I've I was called into a meeting at like 2: in the morning woken up and was
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in a meeting with the leaders for a few hours and then to work at 4: so they can't it can happen at any
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time they can be knocking on your door at midnight what's the anxiety like like
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leading up to these meetings like if you know meetings coming like are you [ __ ] yourself yeah [ __ ] yourself
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and disappearing up up to the bush hiding that's why you're like your but
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you know you're eventually going to have to face the music you you do you know
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you are you just I guess hope that something else someone else does something bad so they take over yeah
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yeah pretty much yeah well I can't imagine how how stressed by does it get easier though like those those those
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telling off you like oh I'm in trouble again it's another one Whatever Yeah you
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sort of just like oh well you and you sort of know learn the lines that they like so you learn the lines that will
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get you out of it so you learn to like say sorry and say what they want you to say so you just keep them in rotation
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and get through it and carry on say praise prise God and bless your brother and hope that does the trick say all the
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right things and then just go back to milking the cows illegally yeah pretty much um a good friend of mine Clint uh
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he's a very funny guy he said um did she have a good role in the concert or was
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she put on the background oh no I didn't have any role didn't no why were you too much of a
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renegade yeah were you yeah was that like a uh like a a privileged position to give a 100% yeah yeah chosen how much
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prep went into those concerts months like six months before the concert like months and months of prep making all the
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costumes long hours yeah was that a um like a good position to have cuz it's a
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I don't know I suppose a bit of Joy yeah it was fun cuz you're doing something
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different and you're and and you're excited about who's going to turn off at
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the concert were you not motivated to change your evil ways to get a SP no and I
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didn't I couldn't think of anything worse than representing nille Copa yeah
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um someone you might know um her Instagram name is man doton says I went to school with the I don't have a
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question I just want her to know that she's an inspiration oh nice yeah how does that make you feel yeah great I
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think I think yeah it feels good yeah yeah since you've been out so what is it now like eight years yeah not
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it'll be nine years next month yeah how many how many conversations have you had
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with people have yelled at you H not me might be the other way around are you yelling at k your partner
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maybe yeah could be yeah but it's strange though isn't it because this is
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all you know and this is this is what you think life's all about and then you
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get out there and you realize that it actually isn't no exactly very abnormal
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you wait I often like I'll be waiting for someone to yell and it doesn't
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happen it's like oh it's not normal like in what sort of circumstances like can you think of any
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that come to mind um probably more just like within the work life and like I don't know and stressful situations that
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you expect people to lash out at you when they're stressed oh and just when you make a mistak somewhere or yeah yeah
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yeah well pleas you don't have to put up with that anymore yeah so uh what has
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changed for her in the past year or so since the escaping Utopia documentary came out um um I think it's been a great
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conversation starter but it's also it's been a journey and it's I guess I still just keeping on thinking
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about my sister in India and like lots of people asking me about how that's going yeah there were a few questions
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about that on Instagram but yeah we're going to um get to that later um biggest
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struggle after leaving Gloria B just the self-confidence and knowing where you fit in and knowing who you
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connect to and like what is life and knowing what you believe in yeah I can't imagine that cuz it must
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feel like um yeah so you were born there you leave at 18 so you know you leave as
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soon as you become an adult so you're having these adult conversations with people and you must just feel like I
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don't know like you you you just can't relate to what's going on and you really
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struggle to fit in yeah a lot of that a lot of like while I was studying like knowing we to fit in I didn't know what
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half the conversations were about um a lot of Googling a lot of um wearing um yeah just trying to fit in yeah a lot
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of wearing what um wearing um what's that what's that brand with the um the ears now I can't
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even think of it oh Playboy Playboy I I I took a Playboy tail to a Christian Camp and had no clue what it
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was oh play funny there but Playboy was popular for a while was that like the the peak s of popularity thing when you
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came out of Glory someone gave it to me I think they did it as a joke and I thought it was cool and I took it to a
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Christian [Laughter] can um besides family and friends does she miss anything from her glory of our
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life you may have covered off that before with the scenery yeah not really nothing um how frequently do people
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leave and does everyone else in glory of our gossip about them feel like we covered off that last bit earlier um but
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yeah how frequently do people leave when I left it was every few like every six months or so every year but now like
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pretty much every day there's someone leaving wow do you know what the population is there now still must be
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like like 500 something right yeah um the left Glory of Val in 2016 which was um Peak Bieber Fever did she know who
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Justin Bieber was absolutely not really no so yeah what were you okay so when you're in there so 15 16 17 18 until you
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left um yeah what were you were you aware of in terms of pop culture and music I I I knew of the Kardashians
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but how like what did you know what did you know about pretty much nothing really but like just photos of them like
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I don't know would look through all the magazines and like um all like the modeling stuff and would look through
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the pictures that way what magazines like when you're in Greymouth for a visit or no like we'd get all the old
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newspapers and go through them um and just like when we're lighting the fire
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at 3:30 in the morning just scroll through W papers out yeah so and in terms of Music nothing we like had the
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illegal like wiring radios together and like listen to a few like songs like Katie Perry songs but other than that
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not really anything yes so what radio did you listen to I would I would have been on
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the radio when you were in cor yeah I think you were yeah I think the edge and that sort of stuff and then like sports
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like I remember when the All Blacks played and like when I was making cheese I had
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a guy come and tell me the score and I'd write it in the cheese book for the the
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World Cup write in the cheese book why the score the black game I don't know I
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just cheese book like a diary or yeah well like when I made cheese we would have to record like all the acid and how
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you what we did how much milk and at the bottom I just like right messages for just for yourself yeah and then I I
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always thought that cuz other people they' be kept in the kitchen and I always thought like it'll be cool once I
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left the other girls getting to read it saying if I left them any messages like I don't know to make them think about
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where they live i' I've never been to Gloria valy and I've never been to prison either but
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like what you're describing sounds like sounds worse than prison yeah a little
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bit um first time she had McDonald's or KFC first time I had um KFC I went through with like a drag queen what went
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through the drive-thru like it was a friend uh like a friend of a friend they were like oh well I'll take you to CC
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and then yeah they were telling me about their life and yeah so this is after you
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left glor of Val and we're living in ockland yeah yeah yeah Y and um what were your thoughts on
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KFC so we had it in gloral it was like nille Cooper's biggest thing oh really
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yeah right he oh so you okay so you'd already had KFC yeah yeah yeah yeah what
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about McDonald's I think we used to go through the drive-thru for the 50 c ice
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creams but I didn't know what it was cuz we never went in and shops like Kmart or
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brisos nothing there's no shops in gr yeah no but the first time you like went
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to one of those um after leaving Gloria Vale yeah I don't I think it was all
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just a blur like Sylvia Park was my closest is small it was overwhelming butting yeah syia Park is
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probably like about the size of the whole Glory of a compound yeah um does she have any favorite swear words
00:25:12
now just the f word did you ever swear in glory of Val uh did you know those words or does
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anyone use not those words but like saying [ __ ] was like the worst thing ever and if someone overheard you you
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you'd get in trouble for that right yeah right um uh what was the coolest little um
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little things you found out after you left don't know there's nothing after
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you left that like just blew your mind really impressed you I just think like you think in a way but like just
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that woman could have an education and like that woman were CEOs and like running the place like that sort of blew
00:26:01
my mind did that seem like unfathomable fathomable to you when 100% that's such
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a cool answer yeah like sort of thing like literally and that I could do that if I wanted and here you are you got a
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degree yeah like like it's it's like I don't think I can um just emphasize
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enough just how how cool that is so you had sort of limited education while you were growing up yeah and then you leave
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at 18 you you don't know anything about the outside world and you've you've
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you've accomplished so much in the last you know eight years since you've been
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out it's really cool hope you're proud of yourself yeah definitely proud of
00:26:37
myself um what was the first movie she saw after leaving Gloria Val hunt for the worlder people oh yeah that's not
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bad what you enjoy it not bad you loved it five stars yeah then again you had nothing to compare
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exactly uh first concert she went to Pink all right okay yeah um your friend Rosie Overcomer who I had on last year
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she said pink is well did you go together no no no um yeah why did you yeah did you like pink yeah it was good
00:27:05
yeah she's a very good perform that sets the bar very high for for other concerts
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I love Sam Smith though I've been to his all his concerts in New Zealand have you
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yeah yeah why what's the appeal with Sam Smith just being different and being who
00:27:18
he is like just him being himself yeah um in terms of Technology uh what was the hardest things to
00:27:26
learn like is it weird when you first get a phone very weird I think I used all my minutes up like on the first
00:27:35
day I don't know who I was talking to but yeah that's of thing yeah and someone wanted to know about clothes and
00:27:42
fashion like um you know I suppose what they mean is um when you wear the same blue dresses your entire life and that's
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all you're knowing uh when you can start making clothing choices for yourself
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what do you what do you get you're wearing jeans today that's um that's not
00:27:58
L step up yeah are jeans comfortable oh so comfy no but I mean when you when you go from
00:28:05
not wearing jeans your entire life to wearing the first time as an adult I think he's a power in wearing jeans as a
00:28:10
woman like for me I mean I talk about in my book like I think it just gives you like a sense of control and
00:28:18
like oh wearing men's clothing but it's not and just I I just find like a power
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in it and in the beginning when you when you started like wearing jewelry have you got ear you got your ears pierced or
00:28:32
yeah you got your ear pierced when you got your like piercings and your tattoo um like was there like a default sense
00:28:38
of guilt or anything no no no not at all no tatos are addictive he yeah when you get in them it does it
00:28:47
sort of feel like the middle finger in a way yeah yeah yeah okay that's great
00:28:51
thanks for answering those Instagram questions oh good does it surprise you is is it weird the sort of things people
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want to know a little bit some really strange questions like what strange just like I guess they want like lots of
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people ask you how many husbands you had or just really weird things yeah but the
00:29:11
husband thing do so you if you were in glor of Ale you'd most definitely be married now with a number of kids yeah
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do you you get any saying who you marry or you just get peered up peered out yeah ni so was there someone earmarked
00:29:24
for you well like my sister got a married and and the guy she married had a whole lot of brothers and often
00:29:32
they'll marry you after to the brothers of that same family but yeah couldn't
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think of anything worse um yeah CU you're in a relationship are you engaged no no but
00:29:45
you're own a house that's a big commitment um with your partner Kevin we
00:29:48
get into that yeah that's cool and um you you you selected him yourself yeah
00:29:54
yeah awesome okay um yeah let's talk about the Glory of our years so earliest
00:30:00
memories like if you go back as far as what you can like feeding feeding lambs and The Paddock and stuff like that at
00:30:06
what sort of age like six yeah yeah yeah CU I suppose at that age like it you only know what you know
00:30:15
right yeah so you don't know any anything different you you don't know that that what's right and what's wrong
00:30:20
and what's normal and what's what's not normal it's just you and your family
00:30:24
and any happy times some like of playing with my sisters and that but a lot of like uncertainty and
00:30:36
anxiety yeah even at a young age yeah my my dad was very like out of control and
00:30:43
abusive so you never knew what what was going to happen in the night abusive in what way physically and like
00:30:52
manipulative of like to my mom yeah never towards you kids um yeah if you tried to get in like stand in
00:31:01
between it and like stop it then you it would get turned to you yeah and the from what I can gather
00:31:08
about the dynamic of uh glor of like families all in the same room yeah so so if a husband is um being abusive to his
00:31:16
wife like the the kids are you're seeing everything they're seeing or hearing
00:31:20
everything yeah like physically abusive verbally abusive sexually abusive yeah you all
00:31:29
yeah all of it that's heartbreaking M yeah and then like overhearing the leaders telling my
00:31:39
mom it's her fault because she's not a submissive wife I think there a lot of
00:31:43
like my like early memories like hearing that yeah and then just knowing like that's
00:31:51
my future if I stay here do you feel um do you feel a degree of sympathy for your mom yeah yeah what about your dad
00:32:04
how do you feel towards him you do you hate him um I wouldn't say I hate him but I don't
00:32:14
have any time for him um it's hard to forgive that yeah yeah I just let him love his life as
00:32:23
long as he's not hurting anyone else why do you think nothing's done about
00:32:31
that these meetings you're talking about where where you is as a very young woman
00:32:36
are getting a dressing down by these middle-aged men for a few hours on a Sunday like why aren't they putting
00:32:41
their energy into geez I'm getting emotional here why aren't they putting
00:32:44
that energy into like addressing like illegal and appalling Behavior like exactly because if they address that
00:32:50
then they've got to address their own behavior and their own behaviors matches
00:32:55
that and so they can't or they don't they don't want to um is there yeah um there's nothing you have
00:33:06
fomo about now about Glory of Val like do you do you feel like you know fomo yeah yeah like when
00:33:13
um when you know there's a big occasion on like um I don't know like maybe the
00:33:18
concert or whatever or maybe your mom's birthday or a sibling's birthday like do
00:33:21
you feel a sense of like mourning or loss that you're not there or not particularly um
00:33:28
not particularly I think I have more of a fear of like missing out on my nieces and nephews lives and
00:33:35
like shaping it and like protecting them like protecting them from what I went through
00:33:43
yeah um you know who could you talk to about things in in glor val like the you know
00:33:51
so from a young age you can remember your dad you know being abusive to your mom like is is there anyone you could
00:33:56
confide in not really like just your own siblings and that's that's it or like I didn't
00:34:03
talk to any of my siblings why I think I don't know you just think they're going to tell on you like
00:34:13
everyone's dobbing each other in like to the leaders and like our family was low
00:34:18
on the hierarchy system so all my siblings are trying to survive they're trying to get higher in the hierarchy
00:34:24
system they'll do anything to get higher so if you say anything to them they'll
00:34:28
do you in like they'll tell the leaders can't even trust your own family
00:34:34
no do you have trust issues now or are you pretty good now um highly skeptical of people that's understand like there's
00:34:43
um sh we we we'll get into the work that you've done since you left Glory ofil
00:34:47
like the work on yourself and it's a lot to unpick like you can't just you know
00:34:52
it it it takes time and and a lot of a lot of work to undo like um you know the pre-programming yeah a lot
00:35:02
um so in your late you get asked to sign a a glory ofil commitment contract yeah
00:35:09
what is that and what sort of age um normally around 16 to 18 young people sign it um in front of all the community
00:35:18
and it's pretty much just like signing your life away and terms of like that
00:35:22
you'll marry whoever they say you won't leave and if you leave the community
00:35:26
you're doing it to the pural of your soul and it's pretty much just saying
00:35:31
like the leaders are the best people in the world essentially yeah so you sort of dodged that because you don't want to
00:35:37
sign it yeah did you did you know at that point that you want it out yeah 100% when when did you when did you
00:35:43
decide you want it out pretty much from the age of 14 I was like I want to get out of here but why just I didn't want
00:35:51
to get a married to anyone in there and I just wanted education um where where did that
00:35:57
strength come from I don't know I think just the strength of like survival and
00:36:04
wanting something better and willing to take the risk with like without knowing what the risk was like
00:36:14
you just I just thought something had to be better than that yeah but there's there's a lot of
00:36:20
people in there that it's it's it's a it's a it's like a it's a risk or a roll
00:36:24
of the dice that they're not prepared to take yeah no they're not because it means if they it means that
00:36:30
their whole life is a lie um when did you start say who did who did you tell that you didn't want to
00:36:38
sign the contract or that you might be interested in leaving like did you talk to your mom about it or anyone or like I
00:36:42
think my mom sort of knew um but like I had a few friends and like they some of them had left and they had gone and so
00:36:51
you sort of talked to them when they were there and then they would disappear they would be gone and then you sort of
00:36:57
just I think the thing that made me stay there as long as I did was that knowing
00:37:01
that once you left you cut off and that was that and so you sort of just hanging
00:37:06
in there hoping you could stay there a bit longer to like I guess get older and then like still have relationships with
00:37:14
your family cuz once you're gone you're gone yeah and I I think it's hard to
00:37:18
imagine like just what a terrifying prospect that is it's everything everything you know this tiny little
00:37:23
this tiny little world that you've got that you've had for 18 years of your
00:37:26
life your family's there absolutely everything you know is there and you're
00:37:29
turning your back on that and it's not there's no um you go out have a look and
00:37:34
if it doesn't work out come back it's like all or nothing and pretty much I
00:37:38
can't imagine um just how terrifying that is for anyone yeah so um so the leadership group they keep trying to get
00:37:46
you to sign the contract yeah um you keep the where's Theo oh she's hiding in
00:37:51
the bush again exactly how long does this go on for this this dance um a few months of like me Pro like getting
00:38:01
up and apologizing and like trying to say that yeah I'm going to I'm not going
00:38:05
to question anymore and then it just came down to someone had come in that had left and I got asked where they were
00:38:14
and I didn't know where they were like they'd come in and they were hiding and
00:38:17
they were being looked for um and I pretty much just someone asked me where they were and I was like someone had
00:38:24
come in from the outside like a former glory of yeah yeah right and um I got asked where they were cuz I was friends
00:38:30
with them and I just like oh I don't know where they are but if I did I wouldn't tell you anyway and then that
00:38:36
just blew up and from there came the thing you we want you to sign the commitment yeah from that it was like on
00:38:44
a Friday morning I just had like nille Cooper his wife other people just coming and screaming at me like saying like you
00:38:52
hate you're a disgrace and like just I don't know going off um um yeah like most most people would find
00:39:00
that sort of um confrontation quite um like distressing are you just numb to it at this time this this point you just
00:39:07
stand there and take it right yeah did it used to break you down in the beginning though it did yeah yeah then
00:39:15
after a while he just grow immune to it pretty much yeah so what like what are your Recollections of the last few days
00:39:21
was it like a a crazy chaotic time or they they sent me to my room cuz I don't
00:39:27
want me to be around any of my friends or any anyone else so I was like sweet went home and sleep all day it was
00:39:35
great that was like sweet didn't have to make any cheese exactly I to do any work
00:39:41
but were you were you actually sweet though because it's um like it's never
00:39:45
it's never nice being in a position where you know you've like let everyone
00:39:48
down or everyone's pissed off with you you know what I mean yeah well no I I
00:39:53
think I was more concerned like about my mom but in terms of me or anything else
00:39:58
I was like it's it's happening like I'm it's I'm going to leave like but you
00:40:03
didn't know when but like how it was going to work out but it sort of exciting in a
00:40:12
way de deep down like um your mom must be quite proud of you I think she is yeah like it's um yeah this Defiance
00:40:22
drak like it's actually something to be proud of it's pretty cool it's just a
00:40:27
question thanks rather than just like tow the line 100% always question yeah yeah so um God what was going through
00:40:35
your mind like the last couple of days so you you knew you were being kicked out yeah I knew it was going to be come
00:40:41
to that um it's just like you didn't know I didn't know what to expect on the
00:40:48
outside but it's just like trying to say goodbye to my friends and stuff not that
00:40:53
I really got to cuz once you sort of say you're going you're like once I said I
00:40:58
was leaving I was sent to my room and the men were out like men were outside my door stopping anyone saying goodbye
00:41:05
to me and then I was just like ushered into a van and taken off the property so you sort of sort of kept in
00:41:12
isolation like use the prison an allery again yeah yeah so I was put out for a couple of days before I actually made
00:41:18
the decision and then yeah once I had said yes you pretty much just like not allowed to see anyone and they
00:41:26
keep you separated and get you out of there as quick as possible and what do you leave with I left with like an old
00:41:33
suitcase filled with random things the one thing I wanted to take was like all the photos that I had of my childhood or
00:41:40
like anything with me in it cuz I knew that once I'd leave they would wrap them
00:41:44
up and they would be gone yeah are they the there's um uh like a photo album in
00:41:49
the middle of your book unveiled is that what those photos are yeah yeah so do they like check you belong in
00:41:57
before you leave you they took my dress off me the Blue Dress yeah yeah cuz your
00:42:02
friend Rosie who I had on the podcast a year ago she she kept one of the one of the dresses I can't remember what her
00:42:07
answer was but there was a reason for doing it that why did they take the dress off you cuz they don't want you to
00:42:12
we it like they don't want you going out and wearing it not that you'd want to
00:42:17
anyway so you okay so what what do you wear when they drop you off at the bus stop they gave me like some old clothes
00:42:24
from the costume room like clo they used to keep the stash of clothes for people
00:42:29
that visited so if like I don't know a a chick turned up with wearing jeans so i'
00:42:35
often offer them skirts to wear so they gave me cloth like a long skirt oh okay so it's civilian clothes but Glory of
00:42:43
our friendly civilian Club so no one no one's going to enter with a like the
00:42:46
bunny on the shirt yeah yeah yeah okay so what time of day do they do they make you leave well I left in the afternoon I
00:42:57
stayed at one of their houses where they put people out um and then yeah they dropped me off bus stop at about 6:00 in
00:43:03
the morning who drops you off at the bus stop my brother and my mom can you remember that last night did you like
00:43:09
you in that the halfway house did you sleep okay or I didn't really sleep and
00:43:14
I think I just remembered like journaling like pretty much writing that I'd done the right thing yeah have you
00:43:21
you keept your journals and things yeah yeah is that what helped make up the book some of it yeah yeah yeah when was
00:43:27
the last time you reflected on that and read on that I think when we did the dock I went
00:43:33
through a lot of it and then you're writing my book how does it make you feel now when you read
00:43:38
it it like you read back and even though like I was leaving and I disagreed with
00:43:43
gloral [ __ ] I was brainwashed like I was messed up in my head but like you were
00:43:49
brainwashed yeah like just my view on the world and like what I thought I could do or be
00:43:59
just I guess I didn't know what wasn't like installed for me once I left and
00:44:05
that yeah can you elaborate on that in terms of that you you thought you thought small or yeah thought small and
00:44:12
everything was based like all my decisions I had a a scripture in the Bible to back up why I did it like it
00:44:20
was always just trying to justify everything and like to try and prove war of our wrong in a way m yeah so um so
00:44:29
your mom and your brother drop you off yeah um what's yeah how long's the car
00:44:34
ride to the bus stop maybe it was like 30 minutes okay you're talking or no just sat there just listening to caddy
00:44:42
per on the radio just sitting there in silence yeah and is it is it is it tense like are they are they angry at you or
00:44:49
they not angry I think then just indifferent yeah I think like this sad that I'm going I
00:44:58
think and then they drop you off um is it a hug I my mom gave me a hug but not my brother yeah and are are you crying I
00:45:09
don't think so I think it's a lot of adrenaline and like just some excitements but some like
00:45:18
like it's finally happening and like just coming to terms with it and you he
00:45:24
so you've got your suitcase the cloth clothes on your back and when do you get
00:45:27
given the $200 yeah they gave it to me then 200 bucks and like an envelope your mom and your brother and can you
00:45:33
remember your last conversation with both of them just the what what you said earlier about my mom like the whole
00:45:39
thing about daming my soul to hell and then like my brother pretty much just said my kids will never hear your name
00:45:46
again and that was that bus was there and it got on see think it's heartbreaking yeah you
00:45:55
you num yourself to it as shitty as it is but yeah so the so the bus T's happen it's
00:46:05
the the first you've seen a bus before you know what a bus is sort of know what
00:46:09
it is this is the first time actually being on a bus yeah yeah and yeah who else is
00:46:17
where do you sit on the bus who else is on the bus just lots of people going to the airport i s over by the window and
00:46:24
yeah didn't Che to anyone no so and do you know how do you know where to get off and it just took me straight
00:46:32
to the airport and once I got there I don't know what to do yes so you go from
00:46:37
Greymouth to Christ Church how long is the bus ride 5 hours it's a lot of time
00:46:42
in your own thought a lot of time in your own thought yeah can you remember what you were thinking or is it too far
00:46:49
too far I remember thinking how am I what am I going to do once I get to the airport and I didn't have a phone at
00:46:55
that point and I'm like how am I to know who's going to pick me up like what's
00:46:58
going to happen like just that sort of thing yeah who so you had a flight booked from Christ Church to Orland yeah
00:47:09
yeah who who was going to pick you up um yeah Alex Alex and Kei who who are they
00:47:15
so my mom grew up in odaho and knew went to school with Keith they were neighbors
00:47:20
and somehow Kea came and visited one of the concerts she was a real estate agent
00:47:25
and I keept one of her real estate agent cards like under my drawer you know when
00:47:30
you pull a drawer out and put it under so I keept one of those cards the whole time and then um my mom rang her number
00:47:38
and they said they would pick me up thinking I was coming for a holiday and that was going to drop me back off at
00:47:44
the airport like a week later yeah oh my God okay well all right we'll get to
00:47:50
them in a second um it's kind of cool that your M your mom played a part in I
00:47:55
suppose helping facilitate take this yeah yeah um okay so you arrive at Cross yourp then what like I I'm I'm fortunate
00:48:03
enough to have done quite a bit of traveling I I still get a little bit of anxiety I'm at like Chang airport in
00:48:08
Singapore or a heath r or something a big airport I can't imagine what it's
00:48:11
like so you're in Cross this is the first first airport you've seen in your
00:48:14
life yeah I was trying to Lug my big heavy bag along and then a guy came up behind me and picked it up and put it on
00:48:21
a trolley and I was like here you go and I was just like what just happened a guy
00:48:25
was nice to me like and that just blew my mind like that a man would help you um and then I
00:48:32
just went straight to the help desk um managed to get on the flight yeah what do you say at the help des and I just
00:48:39
showed them like my ticket I had to print out piece of paper and they show me where to go did you say
00:48:46
I've I've just escaped from Glory of ale or no just tried to tried to bleed
00:48:53
in didn't work I feel like there'd be um I mean there's such a level of awareness
00:49:00
in New Zealand about um about Glory of vale um level of awareness and especially in the South Island yeah so I
00:49:07
feel like most people you metet if you said I've just I've just come from Glory
00:49:11
of vale and I don't know anything about what I'm doing I feel like most people
00:49:13
would be you know quite compassionate yeah you just you didn't want to stand
00:49:17
out like that she could probably tell did you was was your your your voice a bit different to what it is now you got
00:49:22
The Good Old Glory of our accent okay Al so you found a good yeah cuz you could easily go to the help desk and find
00:49:29
someone that wasn't as helpful yeah you you really could depending on what day
00:49:33
someone's having okay so day that there's little things that you don't
00:49:37
even think about like being at an airport for the first time checking your luggage in going through security yeah
00:49:42
so the the lady from the help desk she guided you through all of that yeah should just say go that place so then
00:49:47
I'd go there work that part out then i' figure out the next part then you go to
00:49:52
a cafe and get a panini and that's your $200 gone I don't think that yeah yeah I
00:49:59
I can't imagine what you're going through so then you're waiting for your
00:50:01
flight how long's the wait a a few hours so you're just waiting by the gate yeah
00:50:06
and then my flight was delayed and I didn't know what was happening but made
00:50:10
on the flight somehow yeah what was that like your first flight at 18 is that terrifying
00:50:18
terrifying sit next to screaming baby felt like home but no it's just like oh [ __ ] and I
00:50:25
didn't know where ockland was like I didn't know if I knew my mom grew up in
00:50:29
New Zealand but I didn't really fathom that Oakland was in New Zealand so I didn't really know where I was going had
00:50:36
you never seen a map no well only of like Greymouth maybe they don't really they don't really show you like The
00:50:45
Wider World cuz then that might make you think oh what's out there yeah yeah yeah
00:50:52
um yeah can you remember much about that flight like did you did the screens come
00:50:56
down down with the what did you think of the first New Zealand safety video was a
00:51:00
bit boring I don't know can't remember no I supp you had a lot more lot of
00:51:06
things on your mind what about when they come around and they offer you like a cookie or some chips or whatever did you
00:51:10
grab that coffee did you yeah had you had coffee before yeah we had a little black a coffee black market yeah oh you
00:51:19
weren't supposed to have coffee no right caffeine right I was caffeine sinful
00:51:26
yeah right yeah okay so then you get off the get off the plan at ockland yeah um and all
00:51:32
I had was that real estate agent card looking for the the face that matched it in the air of course cuz you didn't have
00:51:39
a phone I didn't have a phone so but how how did you how did you find your way to
00:51:42
the bag baggage carousel you figure all that out or I just followed the group of
00:51:46
people that came off the pl I was a I was a sheep for once in my life it's hard to get your head around
00:51:54
just just confusing everything is and how confus okay so then you yeah so the tiny little um thumbnail on the the
00:52:02
credit on the the business card yeah you're looking for that person even though it was how how how many years old
00:52:07
was the business card like four right okay and then you managed to find the person yeah keither
00:52:16
and Alex yes they so they pack you up they were looking for me and I just ended up seeing their face right in the
00:52:22
crowd and and what did they know of you just that you were there for a holiday yeah they thought was coming up for a
00:52:27
holiday and they were going to drop me off the next week y when did when did you drop that bombshell that you a
00:52:32
long-term guest I think when we got home though like oh when do when do you need to go
00:52:39
back to the airport like when do we drop you back and I was like oh I can't go
00:52:43
back and then yeah they sort of realized oh [ __ ] what what have we got to deal
00:52:51
with a teenager yeah how were they were they quite quite comp oh yeah 100% they were great yeah drove
00:53:00
me around like when my mom grw up and like yeah it was good that's so kind isn't it yeah um and quite helpful in
00:53:09
and you're teaching you about about things yeah like how to catch the bus and just that was for selfish reasons
00:53:15
they just didn't want to be driving you around probably a traffic yeah just like
00:53:21
supermarket and getting a bank card getting ID all that stuff of course yeah you don't think about that so they um
00:53:28
yeah so they they pick you up from the airport and then you go to Sylvia park on the way home yeah yeah my God that
00:53:34
must have been mindblowing mind blowing just like the the lights the stimulation
00:53:40
everything about it everything it's like what is this place yeah was was that terrifying or
00:53:47
exciting a little bit terrifying but then just like exciting yeah and then where what shops
00:53:53
do you go to just pack and save we just went to pack and save it was laid out at
00:53:56
night yeah got food and like choosing something to eat I don't have a clue didn't have to eat
00:54:05
porridge are do you e the same as like a meal schedule in glory of Ale yeah yeah
00:54:09
yeah yeah so today's we're recording this on a Wednesday what would what
00:54:14
would they be having today probably liver and toast liver and gravy and toast for lunch and maybe like mashed
00:54:21
potato carrots some stew for dinner and some hot custard dessert yuck um yes so what did you have that
00:54:33
first night know can't remember right not Le though not Le no but you or you have a
00:54:40
Coca-Cola though yeah yeah they brought me a box of coke what did you know about Coke
00:54:46
nothing um you must have seen it or seen branding or seen like an ad yeah I knew
00:54:52
that it just had caffeine in it you're a fiend Fe for the so um yeah what's a I can't cuz I
00:55:02
can't remember the first time I had I had um Cocola but I I've got a problem I
00:55:06
still have like three Coke Zeros a day to this day I love the stuff I'm mad for
00:55:11
it so what's it like when you have a Coke for the first time at 18 don't know you didn't like it didn't
00:55:17
like it wasn't a fan and in the book you say um you sort of pretended you like it um so for Alex
00:55:24
and keithy you go like M this is delicious they keep buying it for you why just being compliant or I was
00:55:33
too scared to say that I didn't like it like to have an opinion even though I
00:55:38
had opinions but I was like didn't know um like how they would react M like if
00:55:44
they' be angry at me I don't know wait until Sunday yeah we're going to get the
00:55:49
Coca-Cola leadership group together so and they um they must have been so supportive like in did they were they
00:55:58
giving you an allowance or because that $200 wouldn't have gone very far no um
00:56:04
we went to Wes and got I got a a benefit okay yeah Didn't I mean like got me through that time and then
00:56:15
yeah can you remember how much that was I think it was like $215 a week okay were they charging you some board or
00:56:22
yeah they charge me like $100 a week oh yeah and then um the wins gave me um a voucher for the
00:56:30
warehouse it was Buzzy going to the warehouse loral doesn't believe in the warehouse I so you'd never you'd never
00:56:36
been because they I think when I had Rosie your friend on the podcast she told me maybe should been there but it
00:56:43
was you go in you never go in alone it's always in peers and you go in there with
00:56:46
a purpose like to buy 100 pairs of shoes that are on sale or whatever so you you
00:56:50
could just go in and have a look around and yeah why why was it Buzzy just because they had banned the warehouse um
00:56:59
oh cuz they were selling B yeah yeah and so then it's like oh get to do something
00:57:04
GL doesn't believe in and that sort of was like against what they believed in
00:57:08
was like exciting oh so you wanted to make yourself like Coca-Cola I reckon for that
00:57:15
re it's so much to get your head around like just just beginning like it's like starting starting a brand new
00:57:22
life at the age of 18 when do you when do you start driving lense and things pretty much straight away like I had my
00:57:29
full license within a year um just pay I paid for lessons and kether took me out
00:57:37
I think the first time I drove on the motorway I forgot to put my seat belt on I was so terrified but no straight away
00:57:45
were you motivated personally to do all these things or were were they sort of like telling you this is what we need to
00:57:50
do next they like guided me but I think anything that a woman couldn't do Glory
00:57:56
Val I wanted to do so like women don't really learn to drive or like you don't
00:58:02
get your haircut and like anything that you couldn't do I wanted to prove that I
00:58:08
could yeah and what what sort of clothes did you buy for yourself when you there
00:58:12
were suddenly no restrictions well thankfully I was given like a lot of clothes but like I think I bought my
00:58:18
first pair of jeans the first weekend I was out um but yeah sh they must have felt
00:58:25
so empowering so good yeah yeah and then after 7 months you move out of um Alex and Keith's Place geez are you still in
00:58:32
touch with them now yeah yeah yeah yep it's so kind yeah they're amazing but
00:58:39
they they really they didn't need to do that I suppose not really yeah they could have just run gloryv back up and
00:58:45
said like this isn't okay and sent me back but so when you when you leave their
00:58:52
house what do you do you move into a flat with others or I ended up going so I was going to church for a while when I
00:58:59
first left and an old older lady from one of the churches I went and lived with her and good old
00:59:10
pem and then when you decid decide to um educate and study I went to I did a level five like Early Child Care course
00:59:20
at in the first year of leaving and then started working and then two years years
00:59:26
later went to aut yeah yeah so so that um that first year out like it it sounds it sounds exciting
00:59:35
like there's a there's a lot of exciting stuff going on um but at the same time it must I don't
00:59:43
know within many times where you sort of found yourself like crying yourself to sleep or just cry yeah all the time and
00:59:49
like I remember being in like social situations of being so anxious and like having to go to the bathroom to like
00:59:55
just have a cry and like know that I like I don't know you just felt so out of place you didn't I didn't feel like I
01:00:02
fitted in anywhere and like I was 18 but I didn't feel like I was 18 you felt
01:00:09
like just a little kid or I felt really naive but then also i' had been through
01:00:13
so much [ __ ] that I was like I don't relate to like the typical 18-year- [Music]
01:00:19
old yeah and I suppose that you you think I I should feel happy like um I'm doing things but then there's all
01:00:27
this trauma stuff that at this point hadn't been addressed yeah yeah J you been through a lot eh
01:00:41
yeah and you've yeah you've done very very well so why occupational therapy I think helping people find
01:00:50
meaning in life is sort of what drew me to it yeah I was working and with kids with disabilities at the time and I
01:00:59
think helping people that didn't have a voice of their own find and have a voice
01:01:05
and be do do things that they found meaningful was like really cool I think and I didn't have that growing up so
01:01:15
yeah are there are there many people with um disabilities or special needs in glor val not too many and the ones that
01:01:22
were weren't treated very nicely really in what way because they couldn't work they couldn't
01:01:27
tow the line and they couldn't be like how never wanted them to be and there
01:01:32
was just a lot of bullying yeah so your sister in India um precious that's your name she's been there since
01:01:41
20 2012 yeah so so she left Gloria Vale uh to go to India you left four years later
01:01:50
um why did she leave what are your Recollections of that time why did my sister yeah to go to
01:01:57
India she had visited once when she was 17 and then um the leaders wanted someone to marry a man over there and
01:02:08
she was chosen to go and yeah so she left to go marry him uh and you said on the um escaping
01:02:16
Utopia documentary my goal is I will not let her be forgotten yeah um and and you
01:02:22
haven't no you're still working on it still working on it yeah so in the uh
01:02:28
escaping Utopia documentary there's um a phone call that's recorded on camera um
01:02:32
and it was like the third call that you'd had in N9 years so you had this number um and you kept on trying yeah
01:02:39
but it was hardly ever answered what was that like were you nervous when you know
01:02:44
when you were making the phone call on camera yeah it was being recorded yeah didn't you didn't well you didn't know
01:02:49
what she was going to ask it yeah but no and because it's like our lives are so different and it was like how do
01:02:58
I relate to her yeah do you yeah because the impression that you got in there that escaping Utopia
01:03:07
documentary you go over to India and you get the feeling um that she's miserable
01:03:13
and she's just like waiting for God to save her yeah basically waiting waiting
01:03:18
to die for something better to come along yeah I mean I was like I thought it was going to be bad but that was
01:03:25
really bad and like I didn't even recognize her she wasn't my sister like
01:03:29
she wasn't who I remembered as my sister how was that seeing her on camera for
01:03:33
the first time in like 10 years heartbreaking heartbreaking yeah yeah you described her in that documentary as
01:03:39
lifeless yeah yeah yeah yeah what did that do to you like when when you when you drive away and
01:03:47
you're back at your hotel in India or whatever yeah knowing you're leaving
01:03:50
your sister behind and your nieces and nephews um yeah yeah yeah describe that feeling it's just like dispar in a way
01:04:01
like it's just like there was no hope and it was like how can I it was hard to
01:04:07
walk away knowing that how they were living and knowing that there was like no future for them and where are things
01:04:15
at now um we've done a lot of work with NB and the the Border people and the
01:04:22
police um done lots of interviews memor and working with Debra Manning human rights lawyer um and they're they're
01:04:31
taking it quite seriously and it's work in progress like we're con they updating
01:04:36
us often and yeah so for you what would what would the dream scenario be in terms of your sister and her family to
01:04:44
get them back to New Zealand yeah get them back to New Zealand um not necessarily to leave glor Val but like
01:04:52
to get them to have a life and like to have a choice like that that not stuck in
01:04:59
India yeah because from because from what I could GA from the the vague but pieces I've seen in the do documentary
01:05:05
that's the issue that they may not have the necessary documentation so her passport might be expired or she may not
01:05:10
be able to get passports or documentation for the kids to leave the country yeah okay so yeah so she might
01:05:16
come your goal would be that she might come back to New Zealand potentially go back into Glory of Al if that's what she
01:05:20
chooses to do with the kids you just rather be in New Zealand than over in India yeah and like have the support of
01:05:26
my family I mean the culture in India is not great and like how she's been like
01:05:33
the abuse the cycle of abuse that's in New Zealand gloral is carried on over
01:05:38
there and like the kids aren't safe and she's not safe um where does this energy for you
01:05:46
come from like to keep to keep fighting like you've you know it's hard enough
01:05:50
work um you know establishing your own life and your own career like as a as a you know a woman that's newly fairly
01:05:57
newly like you know escaped or exited Glory of veil yeah um yeah where does the energy come from for you like to
01:06:03
keep fighting for your sister I think the sense of justice and the sense of that everyone deserves to have the
01:06:12
choice to leave gloral that I had and my sister doesn't have that choice right
01:06:16
now and neither do her kids what do you think she makes of um you and the life you're leading now who
01:06:24
knows I mean I hope that she looks them and sees like that at least I have a future and a
01:06:33
choice now um and that I'm happy um but yeah I don't know was she your older
01:06:41
sister yeah she's my older sister yeah what what was she like was she more compliant than what you were more
01:06:47
compliant yeah and like really cared about what the leaders thought and like just trying to get by m and just wanting
01:06:55
to get away from like the abuse of like my father well here here in New Zealand there's um round about 5 million of us
01:07:04
um and only 600 of that 5 million are in glory of our so what could the rest of us do to help or
01:07:11
support I think like keep ringing your local MPS keep um like asking questions about that like asking what they're
01:07:19
going to do but like if you ever metet someone from gloral like just I guess treat them like a normal person like
01:07:26
don't put us all in in a box but also yeah have talk say hello M but in terms of shutting down gloral I think
01:07:39
it's just you're keeping on like advocating and like if there's either
01:07:43
petitions or anything like just join it and like there's always someone there's
01:07:49
always cases but yeah but listen listen to our stories when when people meet yeah what what do they what do they want
01:07:57
to know is it basically the Instagram questions I had a lot of it is does that get annoying or a little bit annoying
01:08:04
and some sometimes people tell you how glor vals running it's like okay but then they don't listen to you so then I
01:08:12
don't really have time for and real so they're basing it on what they've seen
01:08:15
on TV or yeah what sort of things what are they saying oh they just ask you like oh so this happened to you and it's
01:08:22
like not really like that but like they think that they know how glor Bells run yeah it's so annoying when you meet
01:08:30
people like that yeah yeah yeah I mean there's um there's a saying that you've
01:08:36
got one you know one mouth and two ears and you should use them and equal yeah um okay let's talk about your life now
01:08:44
just as we wrap up so you put a post on um Instagram last September where you talked about your medication for
01:08:50
depression yep yeah how's your mental health now um good good M stable as good
01:08:58
as it can be I think it's a it's a journey yeah how so how was your mental
01:09:02
health and and Glory of our like up until the age of 18 just like anxiety and like just numb
01:09:11
and wasn't life wasn't really worth living you did you ever contemplate um
01:09:17
like taking your own life in glory of not really it was only once I left yeah yeah
01:09:26
you okay when was that first two years first three were really hard like frequently
01:09:36
yeah and lots of panic attacks lots of just like what am I doing like yeah that's so understandable yeah um but you
01:09:46
see from the glory of our leaders perspective they'd be like see this is what exactly they would blame it on the
01:09:52
fact that you've left the security of Glory Avail it's like oh it's just like
01:09:58
I yeah I mean I'm an a of what you've done like I can't imagine being in your
01:10:03
position at the age of 18 and like starting to set up a life from brand new at that point it's a lot to go through
01:10:08
so I'm not surprised how did you how did you get out of that sort of fun Co how
01:10:11
did you get through that um therapy and like just talking about it um and then just writing things down
01:10:23
and I think going to UNI sort of sa saved me in a way yeah opened up my world viw yeah yeah who how did you know
01:10:32
about therapy or who who suggested you get therapy it was after it was after I did my first police
01:10:39
statement um in 2018 and then yeah they offered me a therapist you get like five free
01:10:47
sessions and then you got to find your own and yeah that was a mission of its own yeah everything's everything's a
01:10:55
mission know yeah so oh yes what was the what was the police meeting for just um
01:11:00
a statement to like report some of my um abuse like sexual abuse as a child yeah was that from your father no from
01:11:11
family members okay okay has that been addressed by the courts no never went further
01:11:21
right how do you feel about that it's it's hard to like feel that you've
01:11:28
been heard but I think as long as it's in the system and there's a record and
01:11:32
no one else gets hurt by the same person I feel like it was worth doing was there like a rock bottom
01:11:40
moment for you after leaving Glory of V I think yeah 2018 I moved house like five times and like just feeling like
01:11:55
what's the point what's the point of life and just [Music] yeah how are you today when we're
01:12:04
sitting here today in 2025 I think this year is going to be good I'm like grounded and know who I am
01:12:12
and like yeah building my confidence yeah and um Kevin your partner yeah when did
01:12:21
you guys meet how how how did this relationship come about well we meet through friends
01:12:27
um and then yeah we started going out and just over six years later we're still
01:12:35
together it's awesome yeah great that's cool so you met three friends um did he
01:12:41
did he know about your your history that you from glor no no just from me I had sort of told him he wasn't phased at all
01:12:49
was curious or any questions or he was curious but more like that I was okay and like
01:12:55
like are your family still ping you and like just more like making sure I was okay just supportive yeah yeah which is
01:13:03
how how a healthy relationship should be exactly yeah yeah you what are your plans for the future so you guys got a
01:13:10
house y you um his his um childhood cat has just recently died at the age of 14 Y and yeah we're going to get a dog in a
01:13:19
couple of weeks so yeah and then just travel yeah yep you we you want to go what do you want to do I want to go to
01:13:27
Japan but he wants to go to Mongolia don't ask me why but now how do you feel about the future
01:13:34
you feel optimistic yeah yeah yeah it's it's daunting like I have to try not to
01:13:40
think about my sister in India too much in terms of like sometimes I feel like I'm not doing
01:13:47
enough but just got to keep having the conversations and keep working on it and know that something will happen and what
01:13:57
brings you Joy now um just life and like nature um my job and yeah having a home yeah
01:14:09
having a place to call home yeah do you have more happy days than sad days definitely yeah
01:14:17
yeah yeah and we've mentioned your sister that's um over in India and you've got another sister that's just
01:14:22
sitting through the other side of the glass right now yeah um she's only been
01:14:27
out 3 years yeah how how's how's she doing cuz I suppose I mean you've got a big head
01:14:32
start on her like 5 years so you can sort of picture where you were 3 years in which was a dark place um how's she
01:14:39
doing she's doing good just like keeping on having conversations and helping her find her confidence but
01:14:48
she's doing really well um just navigating the therapy like the ACC therapy system is really tough so and
01:14:58
and that's like a big passion for me is like helping that that become easier for
01:15:02
other levers like helping them being able to access that support yeah yeah how often do you see a therapist now
01:15:10
every week still yeah do you find it helpful it is helpful but do you find a good one I have found a good one now but
01:15:18
it's taken me a while yeah it yeah it can take a while yeah they say that about I I put off go to therapy for a
01:15:26
long time for that reason because some friends of mine said oh it's really good
01:15:29
but you know it takes a while to find the right one it's like I don't want to
01:15:32
have that introductory session over and over again it's like I just rather you
01:15:38
just bottle things up but um if you if you persist through it and find a good one that is um well worthwhile yeah yeah
01:15:46
100% yeah you think you'll ever fully get over the trauma no I think it's with you
01:15:53
for life yeah but you're managing to coexist with it yeah yeah yeah and this book um a story
01:16:03
of surviving Glory of unveiled proud of it very proud yeah yeah how do you feel about it coming out
01:16:10
like um anxiety nerves a little bit nervous but I hope I've like done it justice and like used my voice well
01:16:20
enough in it I guess like The Advocate like for other women and not just women from gloral but like women in any
01:16:27
controlled environment yeah I I can see why you were um when you were still in glor why you attracted
01:16:35
to Katie Perry's music it's um it's very um female empowerment yeah yeah you know
01:16:41
you're going to hear me roar it's it's a great song yeah and you know you're a
01:16:44
firework um yeah I think um Katy Per would like to hear that yeah yeah I think like the the name of the book um
01:16:54
like whole unveiled part is like in their woman wear veils like their head scarf and that's supposed to mean that
01:17:02
they're in submission to the men and like that they don't have a voice so
01:17:06
like that was the reason for calling it unveiled like taking off that Veil and using the voice that I have yeah using
01:17:14
like working with my strengths and being me do do you have um at the time we're
01:17:21
recording this the book's yet to be released do you have like moments where you wake up in the middle of the night
01:17:25
thinking about you know some old friends or family reading it and you know what I
01:17:30
mean those moments of like what the Yeah [ __ ] this kind of there might be some
01:17:36
people questioning themselves like I don't know if you read in that part about the my my I don't know just the
01:17:42
things I used to get up to and glor like spitting in the Leader ice cream oh no I
01:17:50
yesterday I'm a real slow reader oh my God is that right I think there might be some leaders
01:17:56
thinking [ __ ] wasn't mine but oh what else what other stuff did you get out to oh um we used to go on
01:18:06
like vacations once a year like know our family went to puni one year um and it's
01:18:12
quite quite a touristy sort of place and like I found a beer bottle in the bush and pretended to be drunk one time it's
01:18:20
like my Goro outfit like 14 stum I was like stumbling around and pretending to be
01:18:27
drunk how how did you how did you know what it meant to be drunk I don't I think just from movies I think oh yeah
01:18:34
um like in the movies that like portrayed the world as being a bad place yeah and I and part of me wanted like
01:18:40
embarrass glor what's your relationship with alcohol like now can you remember the
01:18:45
first time you got drunk yeah was that 18 18 after you got out yeah well there was they have Hound in gloro they what
01:18:53
this the home grew it was called Hound they don't make it anymore but a wh Hound wh Hound was made from hops it
01:18:59
tastes like Spates right we used to drink that like 1.5 L bottles of that stuff but like who who you and you and
01:19:06
the bad kids yeah would break the locks and get it but um outside I think the first the
01:19:14
first thing I think I got drunk off was like a bottle of scrumpy um but no have a good red wine now can't go
01:19:24
wrong don't we all sister centr Flo pen on tell you what it's the best hey um
01:19:30
it's been great to uh sit down with you today Theo yeah thank you it's really
01:19:34
cool um I'm incredibly proud of you and I hope you're proud of yourself too yeah
01:19:38
definitely oh and Taylor Smith now what do we what do we think we like Taylor yeah she's great yeah yeah that's good
01:19:46
all right hey um best of luck for the book hey thank you and um best of luck for the future hopefully um yeah
01:19:52
hopefully there's more happy days than sad days yep hopefully there is