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David Ne, welcome back to my podcast and thank you for having me back and congratulations mate on the the pod lab.
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You know, the last time it was at your place in your little room and here we are now in the pod lab. So,
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congratulations. You obviously set that goal and achieved it. this. Yeah, this is something I feel
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slightly awkward about. Like it's um it's not really because one one of your
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big things is about goal setting and I'm I was saying before and I feel a little
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bit embarrassed about this. I'm not really like a a goal setter per se or like a 5y year 10 year plan. Um but I do
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>> start something and I I work on it every day and it's amazing even without a
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clearly defined goal if you do that where you will end up. >> Right. When we we talked about this
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where intentions and our attentions align, right? So what do you intend? You intended in creating a pod lab, right?
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And your attention aligned with that intention which fundamentally stimulates you to behave in a way that is congruent
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with what you intend. >> Well, I'm I am I'm thinking all the time about the podcast. Like when I'm out
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running, I'm thinking about the podcast and how I can grow the podcast. >> You're obsessive, mate. And that's what
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most, you know, exceptional people are. You know, I I obsess about uh learning. I I'm I'm obsessive uh with a lot of my
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behavior when I'm in the gym. I'm very obsessive. Um and I think there's a
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there's a certain trait that you have with high performers is that they're
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very obsessive. >> I had Sir Peter Beck on the podcast, the founder of Rocket Lab.
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>> Y >> um and he had a quote which stuck with me. He said, "Nothing great is ever
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achieved on a 8 to 5 Monday to Friday schedule." >> No way, man. Absolutely. Which I love
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>> it. It I don't know who said it, but there was a there was a quote, it's a
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good thing to wonder >> and and I think where a lot of leaders go is that they they ponder uh they
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ponder the the technology, they ponder projects, they ponder ideas. Um and that that's not something that you can almost
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physically train for. It's it's just a like a you can maybe create an environment that supports the
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probability of really igniting that. A lot of thinkers for instance um would go in somewhere quite isolated so that we
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weren't distracted to be able to think and ponder. >> Yeah. >> The reason, by the way, I had you on the
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podcast um two years ago when this book came out, The Winning Mindset. >> Um I wanted to get you back cuz I
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thought it's perfect timing at the beginning of 2026. Um it's definitely
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not the sort of podcast that'll be for everyone, but it'll be for a specific
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type of person. Y >> uh and I thought anyone that >> really wants to make significant change
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and improve their own life and and subsequently the life of the people in their sort of um solar system um would
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benefit from this. So that's why that's cool, mate. Well, >> like a kick up the ass for people in a
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way. >> Yeah. Okay. So maybe what we what we could do is making a start and going,
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okay, so how do we go about this? Now, I truly believe in life by design, not life by default.
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>> And I think a lot of people live life by default. Um, and you know, we were talking uh off Mike
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before about, you know, we're we're thrown into this world. We don't get to
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choose our circumstances. We live and then we die. And I think, you know, there's an importance
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to really find meaning and make something out of your life, not exist through life. And a lot of people tend
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to exist through life. [ __ ] that. Right? So, you know, I talk about life by design. So, I'm going to use me as an
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analogy because again, there's a whole lot of areas that we can go into, >> but fundamentally um start with the end
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in mind. So, a lot of people are going, "Look, another year of this, I'm
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freaking over it." Um so I think where you got to start with is this the quality of your life and the quality
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of your performance for instance is directly related to the quality of the questions you ask of yourself and
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qualified others. >> So I think you got to sit down and go and ask yourself uh a more poignant
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question. You know what what what is it that I truly want? And how I sort of premise it with people is go look if you
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could not fail what would you like to do with your life you know and that's a
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great way to start and then we deconstruct it backwards from there you know what I mean and and for me you know
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because there are limitations um you know you have limiting beliefs financially it's tough to get entry into
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what you want to do whatever but you've got to [ __ ] get clear on what you intend right So for me uh as a
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printer I think um when I managed to get off the printing press well I I had a vision which was I wanted to be doing
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this >> I wanted to work with people um especially athletes I was really excited
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about that. >> Yeah. Hey I'll I'll pause you just there. So um yeah
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>> this episode's all about like giving other people like tools and and things
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they can do to prove their improve their own life. If anyone wants to know the David Neith backstory, you can go back
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to the last episode of that or or get the book. But yeah, um basically uh you thought you were a dumb kid. Um you were
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held back a couple of years in school. Yep. >> Diagnosed um with disease in your early
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20s >> and a dead end printing job. >> Yeah. Yeah. That's it. But I I think the
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important thing is I was really clear on what I wanted. Now in my office, you know, one of the things that I talk
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about work with the end of mind. So it starts with a vision and there's an idea
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in the head. So I talk about taking it out and getting a vision board. So for families out there and get it's a great
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family project. Go and get a corkboard, sit down with the kids, get the one each
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and go, if you could not fail, what would you like to do? Now kids are going to go I want to be an astronaut. I want
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to be prime minister in the next couple of weeks. You know what I mean? But even
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for families, it's a wonderful project. I have a picture in my office that I
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drew at the beginning around this time in 1995 of me on stage in front of a whole lot
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of people. It's [ __ ] my reality now. Now back then it was like [ __ ] deluded. Look at you. You're in steel
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cap boots and overalls filling ink ducks mate on seven bucks an hour. So start with the end of mind. Get everyone out
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there to start. If you could not fail, what would you like to do? Right? So that's where we we sort of we talked
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about going into the goal setting sort of thing. So it starts with a vision then then we apply the that smart test.
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So we got to get sensory specific and and specific about what it is that we want. And the reason for that
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fundamentally is that the brain's processing so much information. It uses fuzzy logic and it will do just enough.
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So the more specific you are, the higher the possibility and probability. It doesn't guarantee anything but it incre
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improves the possibility and probability of achieving it. Right? Then you go what
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are the measurables? Okay. So for me I knew that I had to educate myself. I knew that I financially had to get
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myself in a better position. I knew I had to sacrifice. Now for me that was a transition over about 3 to 5 years
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before I actually got to a point of being full-time. So the other thing we've got to appreciate
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is yes, you may have a majestic dream, but get real about the [ __ ] time frames and the commitment and the
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tenacity that's involved because a lot of people are very quick to saying what
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they want, but they're not prepared to put in the [ __ ] effort. >> You know, bottom line is we behave our
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way to success. And you must be tenacious with that in pursuing it because you will inevitably on that
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journey [ __ ] come up against challenges. >> You mentioned vision board before uh
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which I feel like maybe it's a Kiwi thing, but a lot of New Zealanders would
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be >> um maybe like too sheepish or embarrassed to do it or or at least um
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embarrassed to show someone else it. What sort of reaction did you get like 30 years ago when you had a vision board
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with you on stage? Did did people >> Everyone loved it. [ __ ] You know what's interesting? Um,
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is isn't it interesting that you make that statement that you think Kiwis are
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too cheapish? I would disagree. I would say we are one of the greatest nations in the world for being visionary,
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entrepreneurial, uh, punching against the our weight, you know what I mean? We we punch up a a grade, you know what I
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mean? So I would say um whether we debate that or not, fundamentally I know that we need to be fully
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committed to doing anything and everything we possibly can to improve our lives. I mean I get a buzz out of
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living a life back then and getting excited about overtime on Tom and a half cuz I got $10 an hour. Do you know what
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I mean? WHAT THE [ __ ] NOW, you know, I charge 10 grand for an hour. That blows
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my [ __ ] mind. And there's people in this country that make 10,000 a minute.
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>> So, yeah. I I I think what it is is that we've got years and years of people
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talking about this that have it's proven that it it like I said it doesn't
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guarantee anything, Dom, but it just improves the probability and and possibility because you're focusing your
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mind on something. >> Some of the um the many uh well-known New Zealanders you've worked with
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include um Lydia Co, who's the like the greatest New Zealand golfer ever, one of
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the greatest golfers the world's ever produced. Yeah. And um actually 10 years
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ago you started working with um Israelis who who was um a kickboxer at the time with a very mixed performance. Did they
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have vision boards? >> Yeah, absolutely. In fact, we talked about this. Uh Lydia Co was eight when
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she brought her a vision board and what she had done and remember it's very important that the vision board is
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sensory specific to self. So I don't want pictures of of of your idols. I get
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kids to do it especially and they come up with all Messi and all those other great football players I want to be, you
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know, and I'm going hang on, take the shirt and put your face on because the
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brain, you know, there's a there's a theory called the cocktail theory, right? So if you're in a party and
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there's a lot of noise and a lot of people talking, but if someone yells out Dom,
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you'll turn around cuz you'll recognize that, right? So self recognizes self. So
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when it's sensory specific, it's real to self, right? So Lydia basically had a
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beautiful dream cuz kids are wonderful, right? Cuz they're they they haven't
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been contaminated with society, right? Um but she had an image of Anakah Sorenson holding the US open, chopped
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her head off and popped her head on top of it. So Israel had the same thing. He had this the the UFC's middleweight of
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middleweight UFC champion belt superimposed on a picture of him before he even had a UFC contract. So again, it
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goes back to any thought that I continuously hold in my mind will soon seek expression through some practical
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means. And what it does too is that sometimes, you know, you got to appreciate we have between 60 and 80,000
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thoughts a day. [ __ ] knows who was the poor prick who had to keep count. But anyway, that's what we've come up with.
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Right. So, what I'm interested in also is ensuring that the majority of those
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thoughts are congruent with what you intend. >> Okay. Then we've got realistic with the
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process, unrealistic with the vision as we go through the smart test. A for accountability. So, the smart test is
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sensory specific and specific about what it is you want. What are the measurables? to who am I accountable to
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make it happen? Because then you override the procrastination. Uh realistic with the process but
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unrealistic with the vision and then timeline deadline. You start applying all those things. Now you we talked
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about this. You were probably applying a lot of those principles even though you
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weren't intentionally writing them down. >> When when do you give up? What I mean by
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that is say say there's a kid that that does what you're saying and they they
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take a photo of Will Jordan or Bowden Barrett or Damen McKenzie and put their face on the body. When when do you
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accept, okay, you're not going to be an all black? Well, for me, the Golden Globes have just introduced a
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podcast category, >> right? >> Um, so I I uh say I have a vision board
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of me like winning a Golden Globe. >> When When do you give up? >> Even Even if you don't reach that, like
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for me, I'm I'm not going to win a Golden Globe for best podcast. But >> why not?
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>> Well, it feels >> I mean, you've got guests like me on, Dom, it's inevitable. It's probably
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going to happen. >> No, but I can I can see the benefit in that if you think that high.
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>> Yes. Even if you fall short, you're going to be further >> a better version of yourself. Remember,
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have the best of intention. Let go the outcome. >> Remember, we go, we talked earlier,
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intentions and our intentions need to align. What do I intend? I intend to be one of the greatest podcasters in the
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world. Where's my attention? I'm paying attention to the things that I know that
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need to happen to improve the probability. Nothing's [ __ ] guaranteed. Nothing. But you can improve the
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possibility and probability. And how do you fundamentally do that? Bottom line is we behave our way to success. Your
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behavior is congruent with that vision. It improves probability. >> Do you have a vision board at the
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moment? >> I don't. No. What I have is my vision board from 1995 still sits sits on my
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shelf and I every day I'm reminded of it. It's just so universal. I mean, yes,
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it can change. [ __ ] [ __ ] rules, right? You know, everyone goes, you you need to
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be doing this and that. Bottom line, it's about my behavior every day. My behavior is congrent with that vision. I
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mean, when you think about this, Dom, I maybe not on stage talking to three, four, 5,000 people, but we're connecting
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with four, five, 50,000 people. >> Congrant. >> Oh, hey, just a side question. I don't
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know if you know him personally, but to time stamp this conversation, we're recording this in mid January. Um, the
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day before we're recording this, um, Scott Robertson was dumped as the All Black coach.
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>> Say you're working with him. uh on a one-on-one basis. How do like you how do you deal with
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disappointment like that? Like what would you be saying to him today if he was your client?
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>> Yeah, that's that's that's something that's so [ __ ] nuanced. Uh
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the how you can deal with that is you can't put a blanket over how everyone how do I deal with it? Well, every
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individual is completely different. There's no specific uh put it this way. I would premise it in the sense that if
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you were going into a high performance environment like Scott, right? Do we agree that we understand that part
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of the requirement is that it's performance-based and secondary is that it's cutthroat. You can lose your job.
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There's no [ __ ] guarantees. So if you want to play at that game, you have to
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accept the rules. Hey, and I'm sure he was very accepting and understanding of
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that. >> He'll be fine. >> I think he's a brilliant coach personally though.
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>> Oh, and there's no doubt like what he wanted was um the the best for the team,
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but something there's been a glitch in there somewhere. Obviously, >> it m and and that's really not a place
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that I I would want to venture to to talk about per se. >> But from from the world you're in, if
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you're looking at um high performers that are hoping to reach the top of the
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mountain, you always have to deal with being pushed off the peak. Absolutely. It's inevitable. I mean, if you want to
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play the game that you you have to understand the the parameters, the rules. >> Uh there's no [ __ ] gu, but again,
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it's a bit like the game of life. There's no guarantees. You could be hit
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by a [ __ ] car tomorrow. >> Hence why uh at least what I want to be able to do if I assume that I'm going to
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live to I think 99. I reckon I might >> Why 199? >> That's still a good number, isn't it?
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>> That's great. >> Oh yeah. Yeah. Uh, I like to think a hundred.
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But but here's the thing. I I want to look back in reflection and go, you know what? I'm
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[ __ ] proud of me. >> I mean, if I died today, I I could tell you now, I'm I'm bloody proud of myself
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>> for what I've done and what I've achieved and in in essence, the lives that I've affected. It's
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[ __ ] humbling, man. It really is. >> There was um yeah uh this book the winning mindset. So that's when we had
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you in last time on the podcast in the spare room at home. That was two years ago. And there was one massive there was
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so many takeaways from the podcast for me. >> The one big one was the um the positive
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selft talk. >> I think I have a tendency to be sort of self-deprecating. And uh you said
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something to me like [ __ ] that mate. There's no shortage of people that are
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trying to tell tear you down. Don't be one of them. Don't make their job
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easier. And then um I I sent you a message shortly after that like a month or two after that. Yeah.
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>> Um saying, "Um, mate, the podcast is going really well. People love you." And
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you replied, "Mate, I love me, too. If I was a chick, I'd date me." Um,
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>> which which I thought that's really interesting because you are you are
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living what you say. Um, >> yeah. >> What is there a difference between
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between being self-deprecating and being negative? >> Well, put it this way.
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>> I think the key to this is >> and what I talk about is is the selfimage. Now, understand this. Imagine
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a crystal clearar bowl, right? With crystal clearar water in it. And as you look through that bowl, you can see your
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goals, your vision. Now, as I was saying before, how many thoughts do we have a day on average?
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>> You said like 60,000. >> 60 to 80,000 thoughts a day. Now, of those thoughts, they can either
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contribute or contaminate. Now, the gatekeeper is conscious awareness. Because I would say that you know you
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have that negative selft talk >> but the intelligent person that you are you're aware of the fact that you're
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having that >> negative selft talk right. So again the beautiful thing here is because you're
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conscious of that is that you cannot change anything you don't first recognize. So when you recognize that
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you can correct. Now so the the conscious is like the gatekeeper so to speak right? you're consciously aware
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that you change the language. Um, if you don't imagine that crystal clear bowl,
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it's like every time you have a negative thought, it's like a little bit of dot
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of dye. It's just insignificant initially. >> But imagine if you had 20,000 negative
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thoughts a day. Very soon it would be stained, wouldn't it? What nichi say? We
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muddy the waters to make it appear deep. So again, it's very important to apply
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something actually uh from boxing. One of the greatest things ever said is from the referee before the before the
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two fighters come out banging. The first thing he says is >> protect yourself at all times.
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>> That's it. >> Yeah, >> that's protect yourself at all times.
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Again, you need to be consciously aware of what is the [ __ ] story I'm telling. And again, it's it's anchored
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into this. I give myself permission to achieve whatever I dream, right? I'm going to give myself permission to
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pursue it. Like I said, there's no guarantees. >> But [ __ ] big hairy balls stom. Don't
00:20:28
just be a podcaster. Be the podcaster cuz you're already on the way. Are are
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you are you do you find like when you're when you're tired or when you're unwell
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that you're you know you you start talking negative to yourself? Do you catch yourself doing it? It's human,
00:20:42
right? >> Yeah, it it it's human. Look, we we are all human. But here's something that's
00:20:46
interesting, Dom, think about this. Most people are in in employment, right? Okay. They got jobs. Now, how many
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roughly how many sick days do they have a year? >> You get 10, I think. >> 10. [ __ ] Really?
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>> I think that's the In my day, it was like [ __ ] five. It's doubled.
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>> What the hell? >> I was um Yeah, I think it was under Justindra's Labor government. I was
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talking to someone about this the other day. I used to take it as a like a badge
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of honor that I'd go for like two three years without a sick day. Um but it's
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silly use it or lose it. So I kind of regret that now. I think if I was in the system now I'
00:21:18
>> Yeah. And and I think I don't I I I disagree. Look here here's the
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interesting thing. I've been doing my work for 30 years. Dom, do you know how
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many days I've had off sick where I've had to cancel the day's clients?
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>> How many? >> Three. >> One every decade. >> One every Well done, mate. Your math is
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fantastic. one every decade I have to count because I'm sick man there there
00:21:41
was there was a beautiful movie back in our day remember Predator with Arnold Schwarzene
00:21:48
right >> there's a wonderful scene that sums this up right and so they're fighting
00:21:53
>> where where are you going with that bear with me bear with me right so there's a
00:21:58
scene and the guy turns to his mate and he goes you're bleeding and the guy turns around and says I ain't got time
00:22:05
to bleed and he said, "You got time to duck." And he fires up. >> I haven't got time to that. That That is
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so poignant >> because most people put more time and effort into creating their victim story
00:22:17
than they do about getting off their ass and creating something. >> Why is that?
00:22:21
>> Because it's the easier option. >> But you're only holding yourself back,
00:22:29
right? >> Correct. >> I mean, look, let's let's go back to premise on this.
00:22:36
You as an individual are the most majestic project you will ever work on. Not your home, not sorry
00:22:45
trends. Uh not your home and your bathroom and all the and and work and other stuff. Fundamentally,
00:22:52
it starts with you. You are the most incredible project you'll ever work on.
00:22:57
And that will be worked on to the day you die. And when you understand that, it's so so
00:23:06
beautiful. And knowing, you know what, today I I I want to I want to think about something that that that supports
00:23:15
me in becoming the best version of myself because that's the most beautiful project and the most beautiful promise
00:23:23
you could ever keep to yourself. But for you personally, like when negative thoughts or self-doubt creeps
00:23:30
in, like how quickly do you recognize it and how how do you stamp it out? >> Yeah, I I think
00:23:38
and it's hard for me because I generally don't have a lot of negative thoughts
00:23:42
and yes, I am human, but I I do occasionally. Um, and the first things first, right, is I recognize
00:23:52
fundamentally and and let myself sit in it. you know why am I feeling like this right but but the fundamental
00:23:59
programming for me is I know that if I stay there it will start to contaminate the selfimage so immediately sometimes
00:24:08
it's it's valid you know there could be a real reason there that needs to be
00:24:13
investigated >> um but again what I would encourage is that you disassociate the emotions and
00:24:21
look at what the learnings are from it have the you know what I I think that's
00:24:25
really important because then I'm protecting myself and nine times out of 10 a lot of those thoughts that can be
00:24:33
negative actually aren't really that justified. >> You know I I think we were talking um
00:24:40
you know about social media and everyone gets triggered on social media. Um, again, when you've built and worked on
00:24:48
yourself as a project that you become robust and tenacious, you can work your way through that,
00:24:55
navigate through some of those challenges. But you can also apply a certain level of critical thinking. And
00:25:01
I think when you start to reason these things out, um, I think you can slowly disassociate those negative emotions. M
00:25:13
>> I think today everyone seems to be triggered in emotionally sense and you
00:25:17
know there's a real lack of critical thinking and common sense. >> Okay. So vision boards we like vision
00:25:24
boards >> and goal setting which are the smart test. >> Goal setting. Um yeah I think this is
00:25:30
this is my weak spot. So I love books like yours. Like I I'll walk into a paper plus or a a relay store at the
00:25:36
airport and I'm attracted to it. I'll buy your book. I'll buy habits of high
00:25:40
performers from James Lachlan. I'll buy become unstoppable by Gilbert and I'll
00:25:45
read these books, >> but then I won't actually make the next step and implement anything, but I
00:25:49
figure I'm getting all this good food in me. >> Well, you basically it's like a
00:25:53
computer. The brain's like a computer, right? Good [ __ ] goes in, good [ __ ]
00:25:56
comes out. >> Look what you've created, Dom. >> Maybe take a moment of poise
00:26:04
>> to really acknowledge how far you've come. >> Congratulations, man.
00:26:10
>> Yeah. Do you how do you how do you deal with someone like and I'm sure there's a
00:26:13
lot of people like me that uh are never never happy with where they are. >> Uh nor am I.
00:26:21
>> Is that unhealthy? >> No. >> It's like you're always chasing
00:26:24
something like happiness happiness has to be mate. It's curiosity. An investigated life is a life lived,
00:26:34
right? I'm I'm like a [ __ ] kid. You know what I was saying to you before?
00:26:38
I'm really proud of the fact that this year I'm moving to just three days a
00:26:43
week and people and you said to me, "What are you going to do with all the extra [ __ ] time?" Are you [ __ ]
00:26:48
serious? Think about this. What were you like as a kid when you went into a toy store? Were you like, "Oh, look, how
00:26:56
long have we gone?" You know, it's like, "Fuck, I'm off." Right? There is so much
00:27:02
to learn. >> Yeah. There was an interesting thing I wanted to ask you. The last time I had
00:27:07
you on the podcast, you you were working 4 days a week. >> Um, also something else that I found
00:27:10
interesting is you wake up naturally without an alarm clock. When you wake up, you wake up.
00:27:13
>> I have never woken up to an alarm clock in the last 30 years. >> Cuz a lot of the lot of the books I
00:27:18
read, a lot of the podcasts I listen to, they talk about a structured morning routine. Like like Robin Sharma's the 5
00:27:24
a.m. club or whatever. >> Um, so a lot of people listening to this that are into this sort of content might
00:27:28
think where's where's the discipline? Um, yeah. How do you how do you define
00:27:33
discipline with the way you approach your life? Uh, well, I think it's all nuanced, right? And and
00:27:39
and and my personality is I I will follow the law, right? But [ __ ] the rules, man. You know, I I [ __ ]
00:27:48
structured my life how I want to. I don't give a [ __ ] what other people think because I know that in essence,
00:27:55
what I'm doing every [ __ ] day is congruent with my values and beliefs, >> you know? So, if you want to get up at
00:28:03
5:00 a.m., [ __ ] go for it. I don't give a [ __ ] It's great, right? I mean, why
00:28:10
is it that we in this world, it's [ __ ] this or that. [ __ ] the rules, man. I So, I've always been fiercely
00:28:18
independent. I I woke up and I think, you know, what were possibly the reasons for that? Well, for [ __ ] eight years
00:28:24
and and beyond that at Wesley, we were woken up at a time. When I was doing shift work, I had to rely on an alarm
00:28:34
clock. >> I think the alarm clock for me, actually, I've still got I bought it
00:28:39
from a guy at Comprint [ __ ] 40 years ago. >> Um, >> it sits there so I know what time it is.
00:28:48
I wake up now. When I say that, I go to bed. I'm in bed by 9:30, mate. >> And I generally know that I really feel
00:28:56
refreshed and energized. If I get at least 8 to nine hours of sleep, >> and believe my wife goes, mate, within 2
00:29:03
minutes, he's gone. >> I'm you know, you had I was talking to one of the neuroscientists. She said,
00:29:08
"Well, you know, there's about quality of sleep." But I wake up um I love
00:29:14
mornings. So, my morning routine is obviously, you know, you you shower and I don't really have to do too much hair
00:29:21
and makeup. Um, but I love the quiet time in the morning to to read and and again, it's it's like for me, uh,
00:29:29
whether I'm in the moment that Joe gets up, my my my lovely wife, at that point,
00:29:35
then I'll pivot to a podcast. Your podcasts are great, Dom. They really are amazing. Um, so I I'll educate myself.
00:29:43
Now, I'm multi-dimensional. Being dyslexic, I have to I have to find different ways of learning.
00:29:49
>> But fundamentally, I love being curious and learning. >> What a wonderful way. I mean, to live
00:29:57
life curious. M >> you know I I I would I did another podcast and I talked about the
00:30:07
transition from the camel to the lion and ni talked about the last transition to being that
00:30:14
of the child. The child hasn't been polluted with society. It's it's almost
00:30:18
like a clean slate that is investigating life. They're cur kids are wonderful,
00:30:24
right? >> What a wonderful way to live life curiously. I think life just kicks you
00:30:30
in the ass. >> Knocked down a few times. >> It's inevitable. >> Yeah,
00:30:34
>> but what do they say? You kicked in the ass, get get pushed down twice, get up
00:30:39
three. >> [ __ ] It's It's inevitable, isn't it? You're going to have challenges. Um, but
00:30:47
what? Surrender to that. >> Yeah. How how tough was it for you? Can you paint a picture of how tough it was
00:30:52
for you at school? Like being dyslexic, held back. It was [ __ ] hard because you know I I I'll give you a a
00:30:59
significant moment for me >> and kids today are probably in the next probably this week they're all getting
00:31:06
their results for NCAA and whatnot. I was with a mate in Whickeyi Island. Um we went over there cuz we had friends a
00:31:16
mate had a place there. We we were tenting. I was like 15. And I remember public phones then, you
00:31:25
know, 20 cents and you call home. So he called home to get his results and I hear his mom talking, you know, oh yeah,
00:31:32
I'm so proud of you. You done well. You've passed all this. And I've got
00:31:36
this feeling in my gut cuz I knew what was going to h what the results were. I I
00:31:45
walked out of exam. I I really struggled and I got [ __ ] off and frustrated. And
00:31:50
I remember mom saying, "Oh, Dave, what are we going to do >> now?" Here's the thing
00:31:57
in that moment. I could have allowed that to define me as in if you're thick, you then set a
00:32:07
perimeter of expectation based on that a limiting belief. I'm not that bright.
00:32:12
Therefore, I could do a trade or or something that sort of and I'm no disrespect to to trades because, you
00:32:19
know, but I'm talking about a real basic level. >> And fundamentally what I did and
00:32:25
perception is projection. I I went out there and fundamentally got paid to put ink out of a [ __ ] drum into an ink
00:32:33
duct. That's what I [ __ ] did because I thought that's what I was. But there
00:32:38
was something in there that went, "Fuck this. I need I need to change my thinking.
00:32:45
It's only years later that we've realized that dyslexics are [ __ ] superheroes.
00:32:51
>> They're some of the most incredible genius minds that big picture visionary.
00:32:57
[ __ ] >> Richard Branson is dyslexic. Look what he's achieved. So again, we we've got to
00:33:04
be very careful we don't self-impose limiting beliefs. A belief system by definition, Dom, is
00:33:11
something I hope is true. >> Why aren't you still a printer now? Like what gave you the belief that you could
00:33:17
do something better? Was it was it just you you hated your life so much then you
00:33:20
knew the only option was to change? >> No, I think more importantly, I think
00:33:24
there's a a couple of key things based on my personality. If you went and did
00:33:29
your MyersBriggs, they'll come up and from that they can generally give you some guidance as to what sort of
00:33:37
industry you should be doing. So fundamentally it's based on your personality. Do what you are right
00:33:45
on based on my MyersBriggs the worst thing I could possibly be doing is printing or engineering. what I should
00:33:54
be doing is coaching and uh performance coaching. >> I I'm doing what I am.
00:34:03
So yeah, like I said, it's an investigative life. How many people really understand their personalities?
00:34:09
People say, "I do personally profiles." There's some richness in there. And I'm
00:34:13
not saying that it's absolute and [ __ ] perfect, but there's some some bits of information that you can take
00:34:20
away and really think about to help you design your life. >> The other key thing is that I normally
00:34:26
ask people is this. If you could not fail, what would you like to do with your life? That's a wonderful question.
00:34:34
And I I've had so many people that have answered that question and gone, I'd do
00:34:38
this. And then they've set out to work with the end of mind. It's taken time.
00:34:43
Some people have done it in six months, two weeks. Some people three. For me, it
00:34:47
took about five, six years to really get there. >> How do How does that work for someone
00:34:53
that's um say listening to this that's in a like a golden handcuff situation.
00:34:57
So, say maybe they're in their 30s or their 40s. They've been in the same
00:35:00
industry since they left school. So, they're at the point where they're earning a six figure salary.
00:35:04
>> They really want to if they could not fail, what would they do? Um maybe it's
00:35:08
going, you know, I don't know, go and be a primary school teacher. but they couldn't take the you know what I mean?
00:35:14
>> Well, again, >> they've got they've got a family, they've got a mortgage, they've got
00:35:17
commitments. >> Well, that that's where you you got to negotiate what what what are your core
00:35:21
values, right? So, again, something else that people need to unpack is living congrent with your core values.
00:35:30
And a lot of people uh really don't even consider that, you know, what are your
00:35:35
core values? values by definition are the probably the best way to explain it is a
00:35:42
preference times a priority and a belief system you have belief systems but like
00:35:46
values are like a belief system on steroids and you have these core values and and we attach these belief systems
00:35:53
to them right so sometimes you've got to ask yourself I value and when you start
00:36:00
working through that that and that can be very challenging I I say to people look what I'd like you to do is take a
00:36:06
moment And I want you to come up with your 10 10 values that are important for you. Right?
00:36:12
>> And then from then and believe it or not identifying those values for a lot of
00:36:19
people they get to about three or four and after that they're [ __ ] I don't
00:36:23
know I because again they've never asked the question. Remember the quality of my
00:36:28
life is directly related to the quality of the questions asked. So start asking that from there. Then I say, "Right,
00:36:35
let's put it into a hierarchy. What's your number one value?" And I know what
00:36:40
you're going to say. Well, what's your number one value, David? My number
00:36:44
>> a terrible impression. >> Sorry, mate. No, what are I going to ask
00:36:47
you, what are your core values? >> My number one value for me is freedom. >> Freedom. I know that
00:36:58
when I'm free to make my own decisions, to design my life, right? And again,
00:37:02
it's not for everyone. Everyone, we all have different values, but freedom is
00:37:07
very important for me. What do they say? You know, if you're on the plane with a loved one, put it on
00:37:13
yourself first, right? So I love I believe because I've matched my personality, my goals, my intentions to
00:37:23
a lifestyle. I mean I I love my life, right? You know, a highlight for me is having breakfast with my wife every
00:37:30
morning, discussing stuff. We goal set all the time. We don't write it down,
00:37:34
but we have conversations. We hold each other to account. Um, so freedom for me has a ripple down effect because when I
00:37:45
feel that I'm a happier dad, I'm a happier husband. I'm a better husband. I'm a better dad. You know what
00:37:54
I mean? I I I'm a better friend. And I I am very selective. I have a very small
00:38:03
group of people that I really truly call friends. I I don't need a lot of that.
00:38:09
Uh so I don't give a [ __ ] about online and [ __ ] you know? I I I'm I'm happy.
00:38:14
You know, I had someone say to me, "Oh, you should be scaling up your business."
00:38:18
And [ __ ] I don't want to. I It's not congruent with my values. >> This is the thing I find confusing about
00:38:25
you. So, your number one value, you talk about freedom. Yeah. >> Um just when we were in the kitchen
00:38:29
outside before coming in, you you gave me some exciting news that this year you're going down to three days work a
00:38:34
week. >> Three days a week. And um but >> and how did you what did you respond?
00:38:38
>> I don't what I what did I say? I can't even What did I say? >> Why are you going to get What are you
00:38:42
going to do with all the extra time? >> Oh yeah. No, this is the funny thing
00:38:45
with the extra time. You were studying more so you almost so you can work more. >> No, I'm saying to make you a better
00:38:51
>> No, no, no. I'm studying more because what did I say before? >> You are the most majestic project you'll
00:38:59
ever work on. Right. So where's my curiosity? It's in philosophy. Especially
00:39:07
>> I want to dive deeper. Now part of the motivation for that Dom is you got to
00:39:12
appreciate from all my schooling years to the age of 21 I had a a belief that I wasn't that
00:39:21
bright. >> Mhm. >> When I overcame that and learned how to learn. So again it's all proportionate.
00:39:27
A lot of people have finished university uh and in a mast's by the time they're
00:39:33
25. [ __ ] mate. I've only just started. >> I actually uh the next semester I
00:39:41
finished my degrees. I've already finished my philosophy degree, but I'm
00:39:45
finishing my psychology degree. So, I come out uh in in in May this year with two degrees. Um, but that in itself was
00:39:55
something that scared the [ __ ] out of me because I had that history of not that
00:40:00
bright. And where fear lies, there lies your task. I [ __ ] attacked it. I am proud to say, mate, I have an A minus
00:40:10
grade average in philosophy. I never I go back. I never dreamt I work. So, my wife will tell you the
00:40:20
amount of research and and writing and reading that I did that I had to do to get that grade. [ __ ] I worked my ass
00:40:30
off. >> Yeah. So, you you're starting at a lower entry point, so you have to work harder
00:40:33
than other people. I I loved the answer you gave to that to that question because um I mean most people that cut
00:40:40
cut down to say three days work a week would do something unproductive with the extra time like um binge watch Love
00:40:46
Island or I don't know sit on a sit on a chair at home. But the fact that you're
00:40:50
using it um to fulfill your curiosity and >> um it's really cool. >> Yeah, you you you definitely like walk
00:40:57
the walk and talk the talk. >> Well, I've been told that constantly, you know, and I talk about this. I talk
00:41:03
about being congrent and I think that's important also as a coach. You know, I'm
00:41:08
I'm working with high performance and I'm demanding of them the very best, but
00:41:12
I need to be demanding that of myself. Yeah. Especially in those key areas. >> Is is it um Yeah. What's easier working
00:41:19
with a a high performer or just someone say like me that just wants their life to be better. And the reason I ask it's
00:41:24
like high performer I suppose they just want they want to be the absolute best in the world. Someone that wants their
00:41:28
life to be better. You just want to be in like the top 10% of society. There is no difference.
00:41:33
>> Yeah. >> And what I mean by that is the excitement that I have in working with
00:41:38
an individual is the excitement that I have in working with the individual. I don't really care if you're just average
00:41:44
Joe or a high performer. I love seeing people improve and change. So it it it matters
00:41:53
not to me. M you know if if if one minute I've got a a UFC fighter and the next minute I've got a a company
00:41:59
director and the next minute I've got a you know a 12y old kid it it it doesn't
00:42:05
matter. >> I just love working with people. >> Do do you have a good [ __ ] detector?
00:42:11
Like if someone comes to you for their third, fourth, fifth session and they say they've been giving it 100%. Can you
00:42:17
tell they've been they haven't been giving it 100%. >> I am renowned.
00:42:22
I'm renowned. Uh, I've had so many people where, put it this way, um, I'm
00:42:28
very good at sniffing out the [ __ ] Um, how I start my sessions fundamentally with an adult, not so much a child, but
00:42:37
I premise it on this. Do you give me permission to be blunt and honest? So, if we're if I I won't tolerate that sort
00:42:47
of thing. Now, again, I am not everyone's cup of tea. I I'll grant you that. Like some people come to me and
00:42:55
go, "Look, Nath is not really my thing." And that's okay. It has no reflection on
00:43:02
what I'm doing and how I'm doing it. It's just like flavors of ice cream,
00:43:07
right? >> Does Does that hurt your ego even temporarily when >> Couldn't give a [ __ ] mate.
00:43:12
>> Seriously, why why why should it? Because what you got to appreciate, mate, is that it opens the door for
00:43:19
people that I really want to work with. If I have to [ __ ] if I'd be triggered
00:43:24
every [ __ ] day, wouldn't I? I I'm not I I really am. Um yeah, I think that's part of my style
00:43:35
and and the the thing that I'm really proud of is I I attract to me what I what I want. And so, generally, it's
00:43:43
very rare that I have to get to that point. Most of my clients come in the the one
00:43:49
thing I ask of my clients is >> bring in an attitude of curiosity and energy. You bring that we will have
00:43:58
a magical magical session. >> If you don't, it's probably best you
00:44:03
[ __ ] off. >> And I I'll I'll tell you, I'll give you a little example.
00:44:07
>> That's not the conversation you had with Lydia K when she was seven and she
00:44:10
walked in your door, >> right? Lydia, [ __ ] you. But here's something that's interesting.
00:44:15
I had a conversation and I won't go into details of who the person is, right? But
00:44:20
I had a an individual who's a high performer uh well put it this way potential and we sat down we had a
00:44:29
session we had a little half hour and had a conversation and I I I sent to task some some things but what I sense
00:44:37
was um as I said to her look the most important thing you can bring to these sessions is an open mind of curiosity.
00:44:44
Anyway, when I get monotone response with Yeah. >> Right. So, the scenario is instead of
00:44:55
having a session, I I started getting freaking clear and and and the mother of this individual was listening in and I
00:45:04
get an email because I'm basically saying, "Hey, listen. I don't want to
00:45:07
waste my time and your parents' money, blah blah blah." And I I I I talked
00:45:11
about what's really important with an attitude in these sessions. I got an email from the mother going,
00:45:17
"David, I listened in on that cuz you weren't aware that I was outside in the
00:45:22
hallway." And I just want to thank you. Thank you so much for being so blunt and
00:45:29
honest with with this person. Um I I felt so excited about finally someone is speaking some truth. Um so
00:45:41
yeah, look, I have a start line. everyone's cup of tea. But you know, 30 years, Dom, I get results.
00:45:48
>> Results speak. You know what's interesting? In 30 years, I've never
00:45:51
advertised my business. >> All my businesses referral. >> Never ever will you see me online going,
00:45:59
"This is why you should see David Nathy. [ __ ] that." You know, my clients and my
00:46:06
results speak for themselves. So, I have a I I mean, I'm already booked out to
00:46:10
March. Well, fundamentally there's a few gaps, but I I'm booked out weeks and
00:46:15
weeks in advance, and it's been like that for 30 years, mate. It's pretty
00:46:19
cool. >> How good. >> Yeah. >> Um, I answer some questions here. So,
00:46:23
okay, these are kind of random. Um, >> how do I stop negotiating with myself
00:46:28
every time things get hard? >> You cannot change anything you don't first recognize. So, recognize the
00:46:37
pattern. Now again, sometimes there's no true answer. Think about this in leadership because
00:46:46
people say to me, "Leadership's about making a good decision." And I say,
00:46:49
"Yep, to a certain point, but we could agree that there a number of decisions
00:46:55
are just as favorable." So fundamentally, it's not so much about making the right
00:47:01
decision. Fundamentally, it's about making a decision. >> Yeah, I agree. Make the decision, then
00:47:07
make it the right decision. >> And if if you have to pivot, you pivot, but make a [ __ ] decision. Be
00:47:13
decisive. Be assertive. >> My inner voice is brutal. How do I shut it up without lying to myself?
00:47:23
My inner voice is brutal. I would say, mind your language. Think how they've just presented that.
00:47:32
>> My inner voice is brutal. How the [ __ ] does that help? What do you intend? What
00:47:36
do you want to do? And again, based on the premise that we've been given the
00:47:39
gift of life, right? So, we exist. Do you want to exist through life or do you want to get as much out of life before
00:47:46
you know that your inevitable thing is you're going to die? >> So, again, go back to the basic premise.
00:47:53
[ __ ] >> And yes, be more self-supportive. Mind your [ __ ] language. I mean,
00:48:00
think about brutal for [ __ ] sake, man. But I'm uh you've got you've got no
00:48:06
sympathy, but I sort of sympathize with that person because I sort of find it like
00:48:11
>> I don't give a [ __ ] >> But is is it about when you when you
00:48:16
hear yourself um like talking negatively to yourself like just putting the handbrake on and and
00:48:22
>> does that language contribute or contaminate the essence of who I am? You
00:48:28
answer that question based on what you just said is brutal. So let's say it's
00:48:33
brutal selft talk >> if you want to surrender to that that's your [ __ ] choice but fundamentally
00:48:41
life's about making good choices e would you agree it's a good choice to be a
00:48:45
little bit more self-sported and as I said to you >> preserve the learnings disassociate the
00:48:52
negative emotions because again the brain will [ __ ] lie to you we get emotioned all the time but again we got
00:48:58
to reason this >> but some of the some of the absolute best in the world that you work with
00:49:03
like the um the Breakers in 2015, 2016, Israel Adisagna, you know, UFC Hall of Famer Lydia Co, world's best golfer.
00:49:11
>> They've they've got to be talking tough to themselves sometimes, don't they? To
00:49:15
to push themselves to be better. >> Absolutely. But the thing, what's the
00:49:18
intention behind it? By pushing themselves to get better. So, what is their intention is to get better. I
00:49:24
mean, I'm the same in the gym. I'm never satisfied. I want to be the strongest
00:49:28
mother. Beep in the gym. I don't know why. Why did you sell? I >> beat that.
00:49:32
>> Too late. >> [ __ ] You want to talk to David Ney about that? Um, so so but but it's got a
00:49:38
loving intention. Again, it's the difference between those thoughts. They either contribute or
00:49:45
contaminate. So it's again becoming self-aware of it. >> What's one unglamorous habit that
00:49:52
consistently separates people who improve from those who stay stuck? habit. Well, I think the key word here is
00:50:04
habit. So, the difference between the two are the habitual behaviors they display on an ongoing basis.
00:50:11
>> Yeah. Bottom line, we behave our way to success. >> I overthink everything. How do I get out
00:50:18
of my own head? >> How do you how >> he's off he's off the leash. Okay,
00:50:27
I'm going to go out for a couple of minutes. You got >> [ __ ] me. Okay,
00:50:32
so first and foremost, here's what I would premise it with, right? How do you know you're overthinking?
00:50:43
>> H compared to what? Do you have access to my mind? >> No. >> So, you wouldn't know if I'm
00:50:51
overthinking or underthinking. But you would know if you're overthinking or underthinking.
00:50:56
>> Yeah. Okay. So, if you're overthinking, explain to me what overthinking is.
00:51:03
>> Well, it's just it is it is what it is. It's just I suppose overthinking or get
00:51:07
getting in your own head or >> Okay, so here's the thing. The overthinking in of itself,
00:51:14
does it contribute or contaminate? Okay. So, we know potentially then that it's
00:51:21
contaminating. Okay. So, we can then go or what is the conversation that I'm
00:51:26
having? What what what how do I how do I change that? And if I'm overthinking
00:51:33
what I do know is what is it that I intend? So, let's put this into the context of
00:51:40
ideally in in athletic terms flow state, right? Um, and to again the intention behind the overthinking
00:51:51
could be loving because you know you really want to improve. But what you do know is that ideally we've got a frame
00:51:58
of reference. We know we're aware that we're overthinking. We want to get back
00:52:02
into flow state. So how do we best override that? Well, one of the best ways to do that is to recognize that I'm
00:52:09
overthinking. And again, that thinking in of itself is normally attached to feelings. which is then reflected in
00:52:17
physiology, right? So again, you overthink uh and and you're stressed, right? So what's
00:52:23
your physiology like you? You know, >> so one of the best ways to hack it is to
00:52:30
recognize it and then change the physiology. So think about this. We have out of 100% of communication, we
00:52:39
have words, we have tone, and we have physiology. The one that makes the biggest bang for
00:52:44
buck only 7% of communication is words. The rest is uh tonality and physiology based on right. Okay.
00:52:54
>> So if I'm going to attack, do I go do I need to change the language or more
00:52:58
importantly hack the physiology? Think about this. We tend to have a physiology when we're sort of overthinking, right?
00:53:08
So, one of the best things you do to help deal with that and I'm talking in the context of a moment where you got to
00:53:14
perform, right? I'm not talking about at home on the couch, right? Um, in that
00:53:18
moment, this is when I talk about you can anchor into state. So, changing physiology. So, I'd encourage act as if
00:53:24
you did know because the contamination uh can can have an impact on your physiology
00:53:34
and your commitment to what it is that you want to achieve. Right? So, act as if. So, people go, "Well, if if if you
00:53:41
didn't know, I want you to act as if you did know." And and I have this with
00:53:46
clients when they go, "Well, how do you show me without verbalizing that you
00:53:50
know?" What's the first thing they do? Well, I changed my physiology. So,
00:53:56
again, it's it's being consciously aware and then deploying strategies that are
00:54:02
supportive. Uh the analysis could be done after the game, for instance, and you can look at what I need to improve
00:54:08
on. Then you can start programming to make improvement. But in that moment, it's about fundamentally staying in the
00:54:15
zone. So, there's three simple states. And uh so stage one is is just being calm. Right now
00:54:25
I'm all for being calm under pressure, but I I I would say that what's probably
00:54:32
even more important is to in the contents of sport or business is to stay assertive under pressure because you
00:54:41
know you have to be assertive with your decision- making. I mean it's it's nice
00:54:45
to be really calm but again at the end of the day it's about asserting yourself
00:54:49
into that environment whether it's playing or whatever. So calm and that's
00:54:54
when I talk about four five slow. So breathe in for four through the nose, hold for five, out slowly. That helps
00:55:02
change the neurology, right? So the neurobiology in the brain, the cortisone, etc. is then replaced with
00:55:09
serotonin, dopamine, etc., etc. Okay, we're in a better calmer state because
00:55:14
we can't make good decisions when we're emotional. The next, we know we talked
00:55:19
about the child is blissfully happy. I'll guarantee you your best athletes when they absolutely love the game, they
00:55:27
tend to shine. >> You know, I just love it. I mean, for you, you know, when you're running that
00:55:33
that Sydney marathon, even though it must have been [ __ ] challenging and painful, there must have been a real
00:55:39
sense of satisfaction and going, you know, I chose to do I'm [ __ ] proud of
00:55:44
myself. I'm loving this. And then and the last one for me is sometimes when you need some help is disassociate and
00:55:50
borrow resources. So what I talk about that is the urban mch. Do you know what I mean? That alter ego. And for me like
00:55:57
I remember one of my my athletes was really didn't have that supportive negative and had a lot of negative selft
00:56:04
talk and a guy called Adam was the coach and he contacted me and said like you got to we got to do something because
00:56:11
we're about to go comwalth games. help this help me to help her. Um, and uh, her name was and she'll be very
00:56:22
h happy to to mention it, but her name was Tracy Lamberts. This is going back to the Commonwealth Games and [ __ ] man.
00:56:30
We we we she anchored into this lioness, right? Because originally she was from South Africa. She anchored into that and
00:56:38
I said, I want you just to act as if. So, kids are good at it, eh? Adults wear [ __ ] You know, we're embarrassed about
00:56:44
it. But kids, when you were a kid and you got a piece of wood, it became a sword, a rifle, came, right? Your
00:56:51
imagination, right? So, we anchored into this that alter ego. Israel did it beautifully into style bender, right?
00:57:01
And what it does is that you change the physiology so that there's less probability of negative self-t talk to
00:57:09
pollute and and and to sabotage your performance. Um so between those three you you you whatever's necessary in the
00:57:18
contents of the requirement. Um for me I I used to talk about the bull. So when I
00:57:25
was doing strongman I never competed as David Neathy. David Neathy was a mere mortal. But when I was a 10,000 kg bull,
00:57:33
not mere mortal and I'm a human being, right? So I'm limited. But when I became
00:57:39
a 10,000 kg bull, holy [ __ ] man. I'd go on there and I used to I used to freak
00:57:45
out under the, you know, in the powerlifting. I would always have this nervous system response and initially
00:57:53
taking out the bench for instance. And you know the first thought I'd have, they've misloaded the bar. It's too
00:57:59
light. And what it does then, my absolute conviction in knowing that I will finish
00:58:09
this lift. I have done all that I can in alignment to bring forth the best version of me in that moment.
00:58:18
>> That's majestic. >> Yeah, the alter ego thing is interesting. We talked about this a
00:58:23
little bit last time on the podcast. Um and there's there's other examples too
00:58:26
like um Kobe Bryant was the black member. Um even Beyonce, she's got a stage presence. Sasha Pierce.
00:58:33
>> Absolutely. >> And again, >> but it see it seems um like a lot of
00:58:36
adults listening to this think I'm I'm this this just seems weird. >> I don't see her [ __ ] I'm not here to
00:58:42
[ __ ] I don't give a [ __ ] Again, you know me, Dom. I don't I'm not
00:58:48
here to preach and say you should be. I mean, if you don't want to [ __ ] believe it, then don't [ __ ] believe
00:58:53
it. uh in the contents of what I do with a [ __ ] client at that time to get them the very best. This is what I've
00:58:58
done and I've got the [ __ ] track record to prove it. So, [ __ ] up. >> Okay. If if someone wanted to like start
00:59:04
next Monday, um what what could they why not next Monday? Why not now? >> Okay. If someone want to start today,
00:59:10
>> now's good. >> What What can anyone uh doing uh listening to this do in the next week to
00:59:16
set themselves up for a great 2026? >> Well, maybe start with some pondering.
00:59:21
What is it? And again, sometimes it's not so much about I know what I want as
00:59:26
it is I know what I don't want. What don't you want? Well, I don't want to be
00:59:30
[ __ ] struggling financially. >> I'm [ __ ] over this. I know for me,
00:59:36
again, I go back to the quality of your life and the quality of your performance
00:59:40
is directly related to the quality of the questions you ask of yourself and qualified others. not the man on the
00:59:48
street about finances who's got his cup out for [ __ ] sake. >> So again, maybe start with identifying
00:59:57
what it is that you don't want and then what's the opposite of that and what is
01:00:02
it that I need to do? I mean, for me, I I'm really proud of the fact that I I've
01:00:07
set myself up financially. That's why I can only I I only have to do three days
01:00:12
a week. I've I've invested well and and whatnot. Um, but the key to that and
01:00:19
maybe we we could pivot off this three steps to greatness by a wonderful man called Jim Ran who I he was my idol back
01:00:28
in the in the in the ' 90s. Um, I did I tell you I've got a photo with Jim and
01:00:35
I've shared the I'm just saying. Anyway, Jim Ran, three steps to greatness,
01:00:40
right? Number one, set goals. We've discussed the smart test, the vision board, blah blah blah. Okay. The second,
01:00:47
educate yourself. And three, have a financial plan. Um, educate. I I'll tell you now,
01:00:58
education by definition, all right, >> that's very broad. It doesn't mean to
01:01:02
say you have to get a degree in neuroscience, but educate yourself in becoming the
01:01:08
best version of yourself. What did I say earlier? You are the most majestic project you'll ever work on. You need to
01:01:16
start investing into yourself because what is the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over
01:01:25
expecting a different result. Is it going to be easy? No, it [ __ ] won't. It will be tough to be disciplined, to
01:01:34
educate, to read a book. Most people will [ __ ] and moan while they're having
01:01:39
a wine watching a I was going to say podcast, but what what was that thing? Luxury Island or whatever. I mean, well,
01:01:48
don't pretend you don't know. >> I [ __ ] don't. I don't watch TV, mate.
01:01:52
>> No, that that um quote you said before, which I think is an Einstein quote about
01:01:55
the definition of madness doing the same thing. Um that that's why I thought it'd
01:01:59
be a good idea to get you back in at the beginning of 2026 because I've spoken to
01:02:03
so many people over the last couple of weeks towards the end of 2025 and the start of 2026 and everyone says the same
01:02:09
thing, you know, oh let's hope it's a better year, but it's like if you go
01:02:13
into the year and you don't do anything different, you're just hoping. Um maybe
01:02:17
you'll get lucky, maybe some good things will happen e >> but you need to sort of um help help
01:02:21
yourself a little bit. >> Well, look, here's the thing. You know, the wonderful gift that we
01:02:27
have is agency. I believe that we have free will >> and we can choose. We can make better
01:02:33
choices. And again, make better choices. Again, like I said, you you got to sit down and sometimes you got to be blunt
01:02:39
and honest with yourself because most people put more time and effort into [ __ ] creating and reinforcing their
01:02:46
[ __ ] victim story. I'm over this. Now, here's the thing, and isn't it
01:02:51
interesting? It's based on that statement. I hope this year's a better year. Now, what period of time in the
01:02:57
last century were most millionaires made? Apart from the last part with the with
01:03:03
the with the IT age, what period of time were most millionaires made? >> Well, I don't I don't know last year.
01:03:12
>> No, in in the 19th century. So, so 1800 to 1900. In that period, what period of
01:03:20
time were most millionaires made? Now towards the end of the '90s we had the
01:03:23
IT right >> windows and that was all. So that really took off >> but the only the other period was during
01:03:30
the great depression >> 1930s. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah.
01:03:35
>> 20s30s. >> Yeah. 20s30s. Right. So during the great depression where other people were
01:03:40
focusing on doom and gloom others saw opportunity. >> And again this is very important
01:03:46
the language and the representation. You want to speak words of possibility and opportunity. If you're aware that you're
01:03:55
speaking doom and gloom and you It's like the [ __ ] CD. You imagine, you know, that auntie who's always
01:04:05
[ __ ] bitching on. Imagine being in the car listening to her or as we drive down to Wellington, you'd be like,
01:04:11
"Fucking kick her out of the car, mate. [ __ ] her." You know, >> it's ex being around negative people is
01:04:16
exhausting. >> Oh my god. I I am very selective of who I hang out with, right? So the the
01:04:22
important thing is is is is yes, we got to change physiology, but also [ __ ] mind your language.
01:04:28
>> How how can you cut negative people from your life? Say that auntie you're
01:04:31
talking about like >> Oh, it's very easy. >> If it's family or even a spouse and and
01:04:36
you want to go on this path of self-development, self-improvement, like h how do you remove these? I can
01:04:42
understand someone in your friends friend group, maybe you can eliminate them. But if it's family, like what do
01:04:46
you do? Well, it's [ __ ] simple, mate. You you you limit it. I mean, for [ __ ]
01:04:54
sake. Protect yourself at all times. If I said to you right now, I'm going to
01:04:59
absolutely allow you your beautiful wife to be whatever your situ. >> I would say you'd make a very good
01:05:15
decision. >> And again, this is where >> it goes back to that value hierarchy.
01:05:24
Family is number two for me. >> Freedom is number one. I and and for me by definition my family I will allow
01:05:34
into my inner circle. If you come in and contaminate, I will tell you to [ __ ] off.
01:05:41
>> We teach people how to treat us. So you come into my house and you [ __ ]
01:05:45
disrespect it. If I went into your flat and had a [ __ ] on your lounge, you would
01:05:50
lose the [ __ ] plot and tell me to piss off, >> right, >> Dave? This is your last time.
01:05:56
>> I know. >> I'm sorry. I've got a di I've got a diaper on now. But here's the thing. You
01:06:02
would not tolerate that. >> We teach people how to treat us. >> Seems like there's been like just a like
01:06:09
a a few very very basic points. Yeah. That have been recurring in this chat. M >> the um contaminate or contribute that's
01:06:16
come up a lot. >> Yeah. >> Which says to me how important it is. >> It really you need to be aware. I mean
01:06:21
and again this is where I get all these I think the worst device is this and it's also the best device.
01:06:30
>> Um and I think really what it comes down to is learning how to manage it.
01:06:34
I I think you can be I I think it we get to a point especially when you think about media uh online and a lot of it is
01:06:43
negative orientated because it's all clickbait right >> and again it it it's it's a sometimes we
01:06:50
we can get so misled with misinformation and disinformation. Uh, and we we we live it in an extended
01:07:00
world and mate, you're you're sometimes you just got to look what can I control? I can't control what's
01:07:09
happening around the world, but I can sure as hell make sure that my kids, my wife, my family are living a blissful
01:07:17
life as best they can. It's inevitable they're going to have challenges, but
01:07:21
yeah, I want to make sure that I want to tidy my room, so to speak. Yeah, I love that. Yeah. Make sure your
01:07:28
own house is in order and then you can worry about your neighborhood. And >> I think it's a copout because people
01:07:34
spend more time and then you you look at their lives and I'm going mate I I I am
01:07:39
very I am very weary. If for instance for me I I want to be a contributor right? So when I go into the gym I want
01:07:47
to radiate some energy. And you know, generally what happens at the gym I'm at, the moment I walk in, the music
01:07:54
changes cuz I know what I like, right? But I I I I love to encourage people, complete strangers. I just want to see
01:08:03
them thrive and I'll I I'll acknowledge it. The biggest need of an individual is
01:08:09
simply to be affirmed and acknowledged. >> And if you haven't got anything nice to
01:08:13
say, >> shut the [ __ ] up. >> Don't be a contaminator. Look, there are
01:08:18
times when I will pull people out on their [ __ ] story, but only if they have given me
01:08:27
permission to do so. Um, if you're in a group and you're a contaminator, you I
01:08:32
will pull you out. But if people are going to go away and and bitchimone, I [ __ ] just not just I don't care.
01:08:40
>> What's an example of a [ __ ] story? Uh, you know, when someone comes in, uh,
01:08:46
it'll go, "Oh, fuck." You know, it's so [ __ ] hard out there. And, you know,
01:08:51
it's it's sort of they they they bring and they start to contaminate. I mean,
01:08:55
the government the government [ __ ] my business. >> Oh, yeah. [ __ ] Yeah. Whether it's
01:08:59
Labor or National, they're all [ __ ] useless. I mean, look, here's the thing.
01:09:05
>> Why are you at the gym? The gym, as far as I'm concerned, is sacred ground. That is for you when
01:09:13
you're running. It's sacred ground. E, I mean, it moves, but that is where
01:09:20
you [ __ ] probably feel at your best. I love being in the gym, mate. And I want to ensure that I protect myself in
01:09:27
that environment. You know what I mean? I want people in there that are inspiring each other, hitting people. I
01:09:34
I actually stopped. I You get these young lads and they're pulling up a a 140k deft, you know, they're 16 and I'm
01:09:43
going [ __ ] brilliant, boys. That is [ __ ] brilliant. And next thing you know, they're asking me about my journey
01:09:49
and and they're asking about how do they improve and I go, "Look, I'm not a PT,
01:09:53
but I'll tell you this now. >> Just keep doing what you're doing, mate.
01:09:57
Just fall in love with it. I mean, go back to what I talked about. Be that kid. M
01:10:03
>> be that curious kid, man. >> I love that attitude. It's It's Yeah,
01:10:07
don't be a hater, be a celebrator. >> Do you What What is your um personal
01:10:12
experience or thoughts on tall poppy syndrome? >> You know, tearing people down rather
01:10:17
than trying to bring them up. >> I think people that tear them down really showcase just how weak they are.
01:10:26
M >> I'm not interested in hanging around with weak people, >> with weak minds. Um I want to celebrate
01:10:37
success. Uh as he said it, you know, when I win, we all win. He's so right. >> You know, you know, you know, we go back
01:10:46
to um current situation with the All Black coach. Um, not that I want to go deep into that, but um, you know, it
01:10:55
it's it's interesting how everyone's got an opinion, but I would say,
01:11:01
have you walked a mile in his shoes? You know, these guys that get to the ultimate of coaching the greatest rugby
01:11:11
union team in the world, whether it's a season, 12 seasons, whatever, that is one hell of an
01:11:19
achievement, isn't it? >> Do you know what I mean? >> Yeah. You if you aim big for anything,
01:11:25
there's al there's the risk of big disappointment as well. >> Yep. And that unfortunately is has to be
01:11:31
accepted. >> Yeah. You got to grow big hairy bulls. I I I still to this day remember the first
01:11:37
time I talked in front of a group and I absolutely shhat myself and and and again we talked about you know
01:11:44
>> um I needed I knew that on the other side of fear is a better version of me.
01:11:52
every nerve in my system was going [ __ ] don't man it's >> but you you push through that
01:12:01
I I talked about the >> excuse me the the um the story of the buffalo and the
01:12:07
>> coway >> and I think it's so beautiful I told you the story would you like to
01:12:13
know the story >> I think you said the was this the camel >> so when so so the the the the the story
01:12:19
of the cow and the buffalo and plains of Montana, wherever it is in America, and
01:12:24
you can see for miles and you can see the storm coming. And as the storm gets closer, the cow turns around and runs
01:12:32
away. The buffalo turns towards the storm and runs towards it. Now, here's the thing. Who spends more time in the
01:12:39
storm? The cow. Cow can't run a storm. >> The buffalo faces it pushes through it.
01:12:48
So, it's a great metaphor for life. Where fear lies, there lies your task. And that's something that I have always,
01:12:56
you know, for me, whether it's uh being fearful of being under a, you know, 180k
01:13:02
bench when I was almost 50. It scared the [ __ ] out of me, but I knew that's
01:13:06
when I'm most alive, right? >> Uh, academia. My first ever essay, I was
01:13:14
50 years of age. I submitted my first ever essay for university. To this day, it's one of the very rare
01:13:23
moments that I actually cried because I was waiting for that result. I was [ __ ] myself. I've never written
01:13:33
an essay. >> Oh, you cried before the results? >> I c I'm wait I'm No, I got the result
01:13:38
and I started crying. >> Oh, like tears of pride. Tear tears of more tears of pride in the sense that I
01:13:46
had overcome a [ __ ] story that I had believed for many many years. That that's the essence of life. The
01:13:59
overcoming >> that that was probably one of the proudest moments. My proudest moment last year was seeing
01:14:09
my son go up on stage to get his PGA professional certificate. Wow. >> That was so cool.
01:14:14
>> Did you cry then? >> No. For trying hard not to though, mate. I'm in a group of people. You know what
01:14:20
I mean? Oh, there's Dave. It's his dad. He's a high performance coach.
01:14:25
>> Oh, what's wrong with that though? >> I know. I I I did get emotional. I I am
01:14:29
seriously mate. I'm I'm I was wiping tears, mate. I was so proud of him.
01:14:35
>> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Um sh this is a great chat. I always feel so inspired when you come in.
01:14:40
>> Oh, thanks mate. >> Yeah, just a couple more. Um I feel guilty prioritizing myself. How do I get
01:14:46
over that? >> Give yourself permission. >> Yeah, >> great affirmation. I give myself
01:14:51
permission. >> You know, again, that is the most loving thing you could possibly do is to put
01:14:57
yourself first. Now, I think we're sort of brought up with this altruistic mindset. you you've got to be of service
01:15:03
to others. Um I I just don't think that's that's robbing you as an individual. I mean, I feel, you know, I
01:15:12
I I'm going to share something that I' I've really don't share very often, Dom,
01:15:16
and I think and it's not because I want to blow my trumpet, but it's something
01:15:20
that I think needs to be said because it's really important and congruent with
01:15:23
what we're talking. I pride myself Joe and I sat down and I've been doing this
01:15:29
30 years. I have um gift back free coaching and seminars to the tune of over $1.5 million
01:15:43
>> if you added up all my seminars in my hourly rate. I I love giving back, but I
01:15:50
can only give back because I am in that position that I can. >> You know, you've got to you know what
01:15:56
they say, pay yourself first, man. Hey, I got some questions that are Dave Ne specific.
01:16:03
>> Oh. >> Um, what's the biggest mistake you've ever made? >> [ __ ]
01:16:16
>> Running through the catalog of >> [ __ ] hell, man. No, I I really
01:16:20
struggle here. I I think the biggest mistake that I made was believing the [ __ ] belief system that I held in my
01:16:29
teens. >> Mhm. >> That narrative that I'm not that bright. I I I I I reflect now that it was
01:16:37
justified because I was vulnerable in the feedback that I got from peers were saying that I was. And in actual fact,
01:16:44
I've realized now that they were wrong. Mhm. >> I I'm dyslexic and I have a superpower,
01:16:51
>> so [ __ ] him. >> You did, if you dwell on that too long, does it make you sad thinking about that
01:16:56
kid, that skinny, scared kid? >> No, I'm proud of I'm proud of him
01:17:00
because look look again, I I don't dwell that much. I, you know, I'm I'm sort of
01:17:06
forward thinking, mate. You know, I'm I'm excited about the next couple of
01:17:10
weeks and the years and whatnot. So, I don't I mean, occasionally I ponder, but
01:17:14
[ __ ] man. It's who it's understanding this. It's it's a constant becoming.
01:17:21
It's not just that is >> you know we are constantly evolving every day physically mentally you know
01:17:28
what I mean so it's a you know was it Heraclitus said you can never step in the same river twice it's because it's
01:17:39
forever of flowing and that's so beautiful it's constantly flowing. M >> when when do you think you've been your
01:17:47
happiest? >> Oh, there's there's a couple of I mean I'm happy every day really, mate. I mean
01:17:54
I I'm happy when I wake up uh and I sit down with my wife and have breakfast
01:17:59
because I didn't have the alarm go. M um I'm happiest. Uh I still remember um the
01:18:07
Oh, I'm going to have to be really careful here cuz I'm going to get emotional, but I still remember at
01:18:13
Wesley College getting married and my heart burst when Joe walked down that. That was
01:18:25
[ __ ] majestic. That was the a massive catalyst for the rest of my life. >> That moment I think one of the best
01:18:34
decisions I ever made was asking her to marry me. >> How long you been married now?
01:18:38
>> We're coming up 30 years. >> Says a lot that you I mean your eyes are
01:18:44
starting to get a little glazed. It says a lot that you get emotional about her uh 30 years on.
01:18:50
>> The the um the presentation style that you've got on stage and in podcasts like
01:18:54
this. Yep. >> Um, do you talk like that at home? >> Yeah, >> you do.
01:18:58
>> I am congruent, man. I I talk like this at home. I talk like this at the gym. I
01:19:02
talk like this with my mates. Uh, what you get this is not me faking it to mate. I I I am me. You know what I mean?
01:19:11
And and and like I said, I I I'm proud of me. And if you don't like me, [ __ ]
01:19:14
you. >> I don't care. I I really don't care. >> And it's a sense of freedom.
01:19:20
>> I can be me. And I and and I know that generally I I'm a I'm a good man. I I I
01:19:27
love to help people, but I I will not suffer falls and I certainly won't tolerate certain things.
01:19:35
>> Yeah. I love that so much. Some I heard on a podcast um I was listening to over
01:19:38
summer um can you name your great great-grandparents like their their Christian names? And you think that was
01:19:45
only like three generations ago. So you got your parents, your grandparents, and
01:19:48
your great-grandparents. And the point they were making is none of it [ __ ] matters. Like no one's going to be
01:19:53
remembered long term. So live your life for you and just enjoy it and do the best and make the most of it.
01:19:58
>> Edith Barl Fry. >> Oh, you do know. >> Uh >> you recently done an ancestry.com.
01:20:06
>> No, no. Um and the reason why I say that um is I think I think there's some
01:20:14
richness in history. In fact, one of the areas that I really want to go into is history. I I I love it. I'm very
01:20:21
blessed. I've got a good mate of mine who is uh uh one of the fellows at the
01:20:27
New South Wales University. Um was an old client of mine, Matt Burchell, and he's a historian. Um we get on the two
01:20:37
of us talk history, uh political history, political philosophy. See, for me, I love rich conversations.
01:20:48
I thrive for that. You know, when I talked about, you know, my Friday breakfast of champions, I sit down with
01:20:53
with people because that is far more important than oh my god, online [ __ ] You know what I mean? And I
01:21:01
think I think people have lost I mean and I actually sit down in some cases debate. You know, I like a good
01:21:08
argument, but it's done respectfully. I've got some beautiful people that have
01:21:12
different belief systems to me and we can sit down and debate things beautifully without getting emotional
01:21:19
and and and and and throwing you know abuse at each other. I think that's what's lacking I think to
01:21:26
>> oh 100 in this world. >> Yeah. in in a healthy democratic society
01:21:30
that that is what's missing. It feels like you're at a point now if someone um
01:21:33
>> happens to like Trump and the other person doesn't. It's like we we we can't
01:21:37
even have a conversation about >> we can't be friends. >> But if you don't talk these things
01:21:40
through, then you're not getting >> the art of discourse >> again is anchored in freedom, isn't it?
01:21:47
>> Freedom of speech, freedom. This is how ideas are born through dialogue.
01:21:56
What would you say? Maybe this is a better question for Joe, your wife of 30 years to answer, but give it a go. What
01:22:02
would you say your best and worst habits are? >> Um, I can be my best obviously my
01:22:09
personal and who I am. I I like to think I'm I'm pretty funny, too, right? So,
01:22:14
Joe loves a good laugh, right? But at the same time, I'm a very stubborn prick
01:22:20
at times, right? That's not going to shock anyone. >> Here's something that's interesting,
01:22:27
right? Cuz I people say you this is what you're doing. You you love your wife. It
01:22:31
must be utopia. I'm going are you [ __ ] ser? I argue every day with my wife.
01:22:37
>> We argue every day. But again, we argue. But the the the foundation is she knows
01:22:46
>> that I absolutely adore her and love her. And we always anchor back to that.
01:22:52
M >> you know we're very quick to forgive because we we truly understand that
01:23:00
together we're we're a superpower. >> Do you have regrets? >> Regrets?
01:23:06
>> Yeah. >> Getting that tattooed on my back. >> I don't I don't you know I I think
01:23:13
>> you asked me this last time. I I don't really have any regs. I really don't. I
01:23:18
I think >> Are you just good at drawing a line in the sand and moving on? I just think I
01:23:22
think isn't life about experience? Isn't experience one of the inevitable teachers that we're going to
01:23:32
endure as we go on our path through life? >> [ __ ] I I made dumb decisions. I made
01:23:37
good decisions. I've had a good experiences and bad experience. >> That's the richness of life.
01:23:45
>> What are you most afraid of? >> My wife. Um, uh, look, I'm really not, yeah, again, I I just
01:23:58
don't I I I I really struggle to answer that. I'm not afraid of of anything. I
01:24:03
mean, look, do I want to go to war? Hell no. >> But, you know, I'm not really I I want
01:24:10
to be fearless. I And I think fundamentally, I've attacked a lot of those things both in a physical sense
01:24:16
and a mental sense. And so, you know, I'm I'm I wouldn't say that I'm trying
01:24:21
to be some sort of hero. I mean, far from it. But, you know, even certain situations where it was interesting. We
01:24:31
had um I had a beautiful compliment actually from my wife and and we were that unfortunate
01:24:39
shooting in in in um surface paradise, >> you know, and where the where the guys
01:24:45
were out there shooting. >> Oh, Bondi. Bondi. That's it. >> And and
01:24:51
that wonderful managed to disarm one of the the shooters. >> Incredible. >> An amazing. And and and um we were
01:24:59
watching and and and Joe said, you know, that that's something that you would do.
01:25:05
And I I was like, [ __ ] I don't know if I would. But the fact that she truly
01:25:11
believed that and said that, now I don't really want it to be tested, Dom. I
01:25:15
don't really want it to be tested, but >> I think that was an incredible,
01:25:21
beautiful compliment from my wife. That's really something special. You would have done something like that. And
01:25:27
and there has been situations where maybe not to that extreme, but there have been
01:25:33
fights and whatnot where I've intervened and and and said something that needed
01:25:38
to be said. >> Cuz you'd always like to think I think we'd all like to think we'd be that
01:25:42
person. >> Yeah. >> Um >> Yeah. >> But the reality is, would I? Probably
01:25:46
not. >> I don't know if I would. And and quite frankly, I don't really want to try and
01:25:50
find out. I really don't. M >> if this was um a speech like at the Golden Globes or the Academy Awards, who
01:25:57
would you be using this moment to thank for the person you are today? >> Oh, there's a shitload.
01:26:03
>> Is there? >> Yeah, there really are. I've been blessed with uh so many people that have
01:26:08
um obviously first and foremost is my wife. I don't really want to go through
01:26:11
the list because it'll be another [ __ ] hour. I I think I've been blessed with so many people that have
01:26:17
just contributed a little something >> that I've you know a big influence me
01:26:24
would have um was Reverend Jim Kane. He was a wonderful man. >> Oh yeah, we talked about him briefly
01:26:30
last time from um Wesley College and he introduced you to the book um >> Jonathan Livingston Seagull.
01:26:34
>> Yes. >> [ __ ] beautiful man. I mean that uh my first ever coach Clive Littton
01:26:42
unfortunately passed uh last year. Um he was a wonderful man. He he he he challenged me. I love people that um you
01:26:54
know it's the people that I really appreciate are the ones that believed in me when I didn't quite have it in myself
01:27:02
on my journey. You know to this day I still remember Joe going change your t-shirt, get out there
01:27:10
>> to go on stage in front of 5,000 people in Las Vegas. I was [ __ ] myself,
01:27:16
>> but she knew me and she knew I wanted it. >> And it was scary cuz you know, who am I?
01:27:21
I'm a I'm a printer in steel cap boots and overalls filling a duct with ink.
01:27:29
>> But I overcame >> and that's something I'm really proud of. Do you think what about anyone
01:27:34
that's listening to this or watching this that um doesn't have potentially have anyone
01:27:38
that believes in them? How do you how do you find that belief in yourself? >> Well, it starts with self because it
01:27:43
started with me with myself too. You know, if if it's going to be it's up to
01:27:47
me. You got to take complete responsibility. Listen, again, there's no perfect the circumstances are
01:27:56
the circumstances. If you've got no one, so be it. But that doesn't mean to say
01:28:01
that you can't. You just got to make an effort continuously each and every day.
01:28:07
And I will tell you that on if you truly commit to that for the rest of your life, you will attract to you some
01:28:14
pretty amazing people on that pathway. >> That's powerful. And uh last one um Generate Kiwi Saver.
01:28:22
They're my show sponsors. They have been for a few years now and they're obsessed
01:28:26
with performance. They put put it first in everything they do. What's something
01:28:30
in your life that you've obsessed over getting better at and why did it matter
01:28:33
so much to you? >> So the the theme for me was that uh my motto was to be a student of excellence.
01:28:44
So again this is where families can sit down. We put it into the goal setting. You can go right health what's my goal
01:28:51
there? Finance what's my goal there? Uh personal development what's my goal
01:28:56
there? uh kids, what's my goal with the kids? And you can then start drilling
01:29:02
deeper into what specifically are we going to do? Um so for me, especially in in a physical sense, I
01:29:12
wanted to be the biggest, strongest mother I could be. Don't know why I beeped that again.
01:29:18
academia. Uh being a dad, I I am proud of the fact my adult kids like hanging out with me
01:29:28
and mom. That [ __ ] is so cool. My kids love hanging out with us. >> That's pretty cool. That's special, man.
01:29:37
>> It is. And if it doesn't feel like a chore, like they're doing the
01:29:40
fortnightly visit out of necessity. No, I talk to my daughter every well every week, probably couple of times a week.
01:29:49
She's in London. Uh Mitchell Mitchell and I have this incredible relationship.
01:29:54
Uh he is a sarcastic little [ __ ] >> and he's brilliant. He's very sharp with
01:29:59
the comedy and sarcasm. I love that. So, the two of us have a language that even
01:30:04
mom doesn't quite get. >> But we have a special connection. E >> and I have a special connection with my
01:30:11
son >> and a completely different special connection with my daughter. >> These relationships are earned though.
01:30:19
Like you can't just like neglect your kids and selfishly focus on your own projects and then go right kids. I'm
01:30:25
ready for you now. Like it's >> Yeah. Yeah. No, no. It it it's it's
01:30:28
nuanced and it's got to be managed. But fundamentally, I think the fact that I I
01:30:34
have put myself first has allowed me to be a better dad and a better because they model my behavior. Uh and and it's
01:30:42
so incredibly refreshing seeing them ex uh you know I won't go into details but
01:30:49
my my daughter was really proud of the fact that she she she nailed her budget in sales.
01:30:56
>> Uh you know she got a massive bonus. I mean, pounds is pretty good, right? So,
01:31:00
you know, I'm proud of her. You know, she's sitting these she's exceeding, you
01:31:05
know, Mitchell going across that stage for three years of study to get his PGA. Oh, man. It's it's it's and I think as
01:31:13
much as I enjoy my my own achievements, uh the achievements of my kids, [ __ ] that really that's really special.
01:31:24
>> Yeah. Are they Are they proud of you? >> Oh, [ __ ] Absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely.
01:31:29
And they're proud. I mean, my daughter um >> you know, she's I got a beautiful girl,
01:31:35
I got to say. Uh and a beautiful soul and she she's have some guys. I mean, plenty of guys want to date her. Um but
01:31:48
when they get to know her dad, uh you know, she has real pride in going, "Oh,
01:31:54
this is my dad." M >> um that's pretty special. Yeah. I don't
01:31:59
think any guy's good enough for my daughter. >> Is it like the old uh the old
01:32:05
>> my daughter? >> The old joke about sitting on the front porch with the shotgun.
01:32:09
>> Are you a big soft gun here, bro? You know. >> Yeah. No. What What are you like with um
01:32:13
with her partners? Are are you >> Oh, look. I I I wouldn't trust her to
01:32:16
make >> I would My daughter and my son are very savvy. I mean, you go into Mitchell's
01:32:22
room. He is so many books in philosophy. He is he again understands the importance of educating himself. You
01:32:30
know, my kids are solid. >> That's so reassuring. >> I love that.
01:32:35
>> Yeah. >> Right. Okay. So, just in closing, um >> yeah, for anyone that's still listening,
01:32:41
um an hour an hour 30 in. >> Oh, we've done well. >> The these these are people that really
01:32:45
want to do [ __ ] better with their life in 2026. So, start with the vision board.
01:32:49
>> Yep. >> Start with the end of mind. clarify what it exactly is that you want and then
01:32:54
start tenaciously working towards creating it. >> That could take three weeks, it could
01:33:02
take three years, it may take 30. >> I feel that's the exciting bit coming up
01:33:07
with a vision board. It's like arts and craft like designing designing your dream.
01:33:10
>> My god. And the amount of kids, the kids love it, parents love it. And again, if
01:33:16
you do this as a family, what are you teaching your children? >> [ __ ] habits for success.
01:33:26
>> Yeah. And you're teaching them not to have self-limitating self-limiting
01:33:29
beliefs. >> Yes. And and and to understand, you know, look, kids, we got to appreciate
01:33:34
their developing brain. So, they're going to filter the word world emotionally. But if you start building
01:33:41
these habitual processes, oh man, you're going to you're going to have children
01:33:47
that are going to be robust, solid, positive, passionate, curious, wonderful contributors to society.
01:33:59
>> I think that's a good place to end it. Anything anything to add? >> No, that's it.
01:34:03
>> No, we're good. >> We're good. >> David Ne, always a pleasure. And by the
01:34:06
way, your book, The Winning Mindset, which has been out a couple of years now, um, for
01:34:10
>> Yes, we've reprinted. We were sold out. We got another and we've got a copy
01:34:14
here. So, I don't know how we're going to give it away, Dom. >> I'll do a giveaway on Instagram.
01:34:19
>> Done. >> Give it away online. Give it away. >> Um, and if you want to look that book
01:34:22
up, it's still available at Yeah. Fish Pond, Mighty Ape, Paper Plus, all those
01:34:25
places. Get it online. >> Yep. >> Yeah. If you read that book and implement some of the changes, um, it
01:34:31
will it'll make your life better. >> Yep. Absolutely. Yeah. Without a doubt.
01:34:35
It's a very It's a very simple, humble book. It's nothing complicated. It's in
01:34:40
simple language. I'm not trying to be an academic here. Um, which I think is part
01:34:46
of the reason why it's been so successful is that people can really relate to it.
01:34:51
>> Brilliant. David Nath, always a pleasure. >> Oh, thank you, Don.