00:00:00
attention Riso aoma victims if you or a loved one has Riso aoma and it's causing
00:00:06
terrible headaches and fits of Rage we feel your pain it's terrible that George's annoying laughter has put innocent Americans In Harm's Way call us right
00:00:19
now call the Santino and Lee Law Firm 18884 313611 you two are bad friends who are these two idiots w a white dude and an
00:00:32
Asian dude you two are disgusting you two or something we're bad friends I'm back y'all and I'm back y'all and I'm biggity back and I'm back
00:00:43
y'all first of all um George before we start this is regular red bull rut R holy [ __ ] do you have the sugarfree or do you have the sug free George or no
00:00:57
cuz otherwise we're throwing a fit I'm not gonna throw a fit I'm throwing F I'm not throwing a fit want sugar free
00:01:06
George by the way you know those things what's the difference between sugar-free anyway sugar-free well one has one has
00:01:12
sugar and the other one has toine well it's fake sugar which is worse for you so you should just drink good sugar real
00:01:18
sugar real real sugar is not yes fake sugar is so bad for this has real sugar in it well look at it what does it say I
00:01:25
don't know I don't drink Red Bull it says toine lightly carbonated torine is the energy element
00:01:31
what's the sugar element the sugar element is do you think toine is sugar do you think torine is sugar it could
00:01:38
be man it's going to be back no because I'll tell you why a lot of times um they
00:01:44
hide um certain in ingredients is right and it could it's something else but I don't know like the technical ter ter
00:01:50
term I'll I'll give you an example it says here um naside right oh you know what naside is it could be but here's the thing it's a balance inhibitor it makes sure that your balance is good even when you're running
00:02:03
at a high level it could be like you know bulld dick ground up bulck but they you know they then they put a term on it nide and I'm drinking bulck but I'm
00:02:14
really you know what I mean but I think it's nice do you really think there's bull dick in there I think there's some
00:02:20
dick in here yeah I think there's some dick in here there is some dick but I don't think it's bul dick I've heard stories that there's like Red Bull what
00:02:26
is it there's some bull bullish elements in here uh well do you want to know the history of it yeah I'd love to seriously
00:02:33
it was created by a German guy yeah and it's by it's like 20 years old it only came to America the past 10 years yeah
00:02:38
cuz I went to Thailand they have the Red Bull there as well Red Bull started in thail started in Thailand it did listen
00:02:43
a German guy stole the company like stole the idea and brought it to Germany in the Netherlands and that's where it
00:02:49
that's where it started to grow in Europe he stole the idea it translates to Red Bull the name of the company
00:02:55
translates to Red Bull I'm dead serious in Tai red sming cuz I'm just good to see you I know I'm glad to be back in
00:03:01
Tha Red Bull to say it it's that that means Red Bull that TI I know what did you do to my head by
00:03:11
the way we got these great figurines from vanuel and uh my head broke we're going to glue it back on and I'm really sad somehow my head broke what's the hey
00:03:19
oh [ __ ] what is this get this off why is this here well you didn't even let George explain why don't shake
00:03:25
the table cuz then I won't get then my head will fall off again what is this this what is it today Bob do you want to
00:03:32
ask George do you want to ask George why he do George do you have sugar-free Red Bull for him I'll go buy some sir yeah yeah yeah well also what is this four
00:03:38
what does four mean this four our fourth podcast what does the four mean thank you George I love it's our fourth podcast no we've done way more than
00:03:50
four we've done more than four it's my birthday today today is my birthday no it's not
00:03:57
yes it is today's my born day I was born today today's your birthday yes it is can I can can I read you the text on my
00:04:02
mother I honestly I got to I got to look it up because if I didn't know it was your birthday and I'm going to feel so
00:04:08
guilty yeah so no I knew you would know and I know and I said to them I knew I said I'll bet $1,000 huh I tell these
00:04:15
guys they'll he'll never know my birthday Santino birthday did you know it was my birthday no happy birthday to
00:04:22
thanks yeah thanks and you know what's so [ __ ] up about October 16th that's my birthday that's today oh [ __ ] that's
00:04:27
today well um I got you something what' you get me um regular regular I know you don't like does that have bull dick in it it's got B dick oh I love these it's got N I
00:04:40
don't drink this I don't drink that stuff but thank you is it really BR how old are you I feel so bad 37 you don't feel bad at all don't Li I tell you why
00:04:46
liar because for my birthday right you got me stuff I got you a Christa Stefano and I got you a cake and he got you
00:04:52
ramen noodles then they got you Corona so you know what I mean that was for your birthday early birthday that
00:04:59
was your birthday that was my birthday to give you Corona was to give me Corona yeah ironically enough I brought a gift to uh the studio and it's for Rudy jwes
00:05:07
because I think she deserv I'm 37 37 you're that much younger than me mhm I've got so much more life to live but you look so much older you this is from uh this is from
00:05:19
this company ma Los Angeles they look what they got for Rudy show show everybody at home show Tito and uh and
00:05:26
show the Fe look at what what did she need more than anything what did you get sick of what did you get sick of Bob her
00:05:33
um her repulsive her repulsive sandals she finally got new sandals say thank you Ma Los Angeles thank you thank you m Angeles buring socks no that's a
00:05:45
competitor dude what's it called ma Los Angeles I love Mal look on the bottom it
00:05:50
says it read it out loud say what it is they sent you shoes what does it say on the bottom of the shoe ma Los Angeles ma
00:05:57
Los Angeles that's a company ma la try them on and put your foot up let let people see
00:06:02
your let's see wait hold on hold on put your foot up so people can see the old sandals to the new sandals put your foot up so people see also this will end up
00:06:08
on like Wiki feet or something now I just realized gross let's see the old sandals my feet is dirty yeah we know
00:06:16
okay those are the old ones look at those [ __ ] things I know those are [ __ ] feed Jesus Christ climb the [ __ ]
00:06:22
out of a tree to you could water ski on those I know oh I like it like if she was an Eskimo she wouldn't need those
00:06:27
show School snow s SHO yeah they would look down and be like you yeah take your shoes off you're okay yeah yeah yeah take your shoes off let me see what they look like are they comfy yeah
00:06:39
yeah in fact throw those other ones away the brown ones yeah right in the trash right over there please honestly I don't ever want to see those ever again see
00:06:45
look at Al sis those are like they're from home yeah yeah they're my only reminder of the motherland who made the other ones those had have been handmade
00:06:52
I don't know I thinka just gave it to me oh yeah well I gave you new sandals from my Los Angeles so thank you very nice
00:07:00
so um it's your no you're not yeah I I I'll tell you why I am by the way it's my first day back from covid and I was like I'm coming back we're shooting on my
00:07:10
birthday he won't even know or care and you know what ding ding ding I was right
00:07:15
I care I feel bad you know I'll tell you why I'm mad at Facebook because usually
00:07:22
um I'm not on Facebook is that why yeah I don't do Facebook yeah because I get notifications that's how you know that's
00:07:29
how I know know so it'll say um Bobby it's you should wish Cassie not you but Cassie happy birthday and I I I always go no and I turn it off right but um if
00:07:40
they said it yeah right why aren't you on Facebook why do I want to be onook you know who's on Facebook like aunts
00:07:46
like moms and aunts and I know but your family and stuff you you can reach out to cousins I have high school friends I'm friends with on Facebook the moment
00:07:52
I moved to California I cut those people out of my life that's right I don't talk
00:07:57
family oh but we miss you don't forget where you came from that's why I moved away leave me alone no I connect with
00:08:05
them in real life not Facebook I connect with them on like you know on on email or pictures or text I stay in good contact with my fam have you noticed too that I'm not
00:08:16
trying to I'm not being mean anymore yeah it's a little Annoying I wish you would get back to where you were no no no I can't why I'm not going to be mean
00:08:24
now you know because when I turned 50 I'm 49 I mean right and then when you got Co I cared so much I know it hurt me
00:08:32
mhm I'm like please Lord please don't let him die I have proof that you that you talk [ __ ] about me on uh on uh on
00:08:40
video games saying people were like what if satio dies and you're like if he dies he dies no I have audio proof of that
00:08:45
literally never said that I have audio proof I'm going to play it on next week's episode yeah play it next week because you'll have to make it up because I never said that who am I
00:08:51
playing with I'm not playing with anybody online yes you are no I'm playing with my brother who doesn't
00:08:57
stream and this kid Dylan Dylan no Dylan doesn't stream Dylan streams no he does he's been recording stuff I have not
00:09:03
been talking about you trting I don't ever talk about you I don't give a [ __ ] okay okay I don't talk can this be about
00:09:10
me for a second it's my day happy birthday thank you can I read you what my mom said to me what the Beast read me
00:09:16
what the Beast said honestly yeah yeah don't I was just trying to get back to my old self yeah but other stuff okay
00:09:22
all apologize thinking of my boy this morning that's what I hear a you know how pretty my mom is compared to your mom it's unbelievable I know my mom's my mom's actually pretty and your mom is you know a decrep my mom is a yellow
00:09:37
cockroach one of her eyes is much lower on her cheek look at George went and got you a sugar-free Red Bull you're such a
00:09:43
[ __ ] brat thank you George I was just kidding I don't no you [ __ ] War I was just kidding you the store you were not
00:09:50
kidding that's rid dick you're such a [ __ ] oh man and listen to what she said yeah uh I have so many fond memories of you how used how you used to run away from me and I couldn't run with
00:10:01
groceries so I got scared you used to crawl out of your crib at 2 and use the wall as a
00:10:07
backboard to throw toys back in your crib and climb back in yeah the rage started there how we had to change preschool preschools three times because
00:10:14
you were very bored and too disruptive you're dumb no I just would get into fights and ruin stuff yeah because your
00:10:20
emotions you couldn't handle your emotions we probably should have skipped kindergarten and moved right into first
00:10:26
grade but one of my favorites is when you were were telling dad about the DC trip you were going to take we were
00:10:31
going to go to DC in high school to go to the white see the White House Bob don't fall asleep I'm not I'm just
00:10:37
focusing piece of [ __ ] you're you're a piece of [ __ ] I love your mom you're such an annoying
00:10:44
person she a wonderful person I'm so happy to be back how are you rude I'm good I'm back in the studio
00:10:50
baby huh Miss information I feel so good you don't know what it's like living with her that feels good she's a good
00:10:57
girl she she first of all this is what she does I I could I I'll record it every day I
00:11:04
go how are you or how is school or you know how are you feeling yeah right not one time has she ever asked how I am what I ate what I'm wait wait wait why
00:11:18
would she want to know what you ate what a weird thing to say no like I I always ask her because sometimes we don't have
00:11:23
dinner together sure I go what you like last night I go what' you have for dinner tonight but that's selfish you just want to know because you like to
00:11:29
think about food a lot because you're tub that's not true no I when you ask somebody how you feel how are you
00:11:35
feeling that's [ __ ] weird no but the food thing is weird what did you eat [ __ ] the food thing [ __ ] the food thing
00:11:41
I shouldn't even use that an example you shouldn't have so wait do you do you never ask him how he feels jwes I think I asked him like three days ago if he
00:11:48
was depressed oh yeah because I mope around and also I only do that that one specific case when
00:11:56
she asked me I exaggerate ated right my mood so that she would ask me so I was like I woke oh I'm walking through the house yeah oh
00:12:09
no right I'm kind of like you know what I mean and I work I I walk in a circle oh no no no
00:12:17
right right and she goes how are you are you depressed that's very nice I only did
00:12:22
that so she could I want her to ask when I'm not acting like that well how would
00:12:27
she know then if you're depressed if you just it's not about depressing it's just I want her to ask me how I'm feeling about
00:12:35
my day my dreams I have [ __ ] dreams Andrew what what are your dreams I want to fly in the sky you'll never be able
00:12:41
to you're too too too heavy heavy no but that's just a metaphor right oh right I want to soar well you are soaring bro I
00:12:49
Want to Be Free look at you you're doing so well but I just need people around me in my house who asking care how not
00:12:56
constantly one time I every day [ __ ] sorry how often do you ask her really every day yeah every day and how often do you genuinely ask him how he is um
00:13:08
how many times since we've lived together in the last eight months be honest uh maybe five times
00:13:15
that's that's dope one time are you depressed three days ago you've never asked me before [ __ ] you okay I love you
00:13:22
but than [ __ ] you you know so my point is is this well no time out let's get her perspective why do you feel like you
00:13:28
don't knowing that he gets bothered by it why don't you ask him more often yeah because I'm scared that if I ask because
00:13:35
he's always grumpy every morning he is yeah he's grumpy even in the afternoon you know that's an attack on me no he's grumpy in the evening when is he notp so
00:13:42
I don't want to like oh I'm grumpy at night too is that what you're saying sometimes how in what way like when
00:13:48
you're when you're done with your game oh oh okay all right so you [ __ ] look at you what you're doing right now I'm expain no no no no so you're saying is this hear me
00:14:02
out at 2: in the morning when I'm done playing yeah when you're [ __ ] asleep cuz you have school at 6:30 in the morning you witness me being grumpy no
00:14:13
that's crazy like at 9 or 10 9 or 10 I so you think I walk through the house at 9 or 10 angry and depressed sometimes you sigh a lot like a very big and then
00:14:25
if one sigh right if you sigh a lot I hey bud what's the matter no you wouldn't you wouldn't even notice I was sighing but if someone in my house if if someone in my house is sighing a lot I would take it as an annoying indication
00:14:36
that they want attention if you walk through my house and went I go what what is that what do you
00:14:43
want so you I do that a lot I sigh a lot at night yeah that's interesting because you want someone to go WR that's the
00:14:49
reason why you right you you you have never asked me how I'm feeling I don't want to I don't want to
00:14:56
annoy you oh that's that's very nice she doesn't want to annoy she doesn't want to bother you she acts she asks she she
00:15:04
acts she acts she acts okay she'd be asking what she'd be aing yeah right as if I'm like Kanye or something to her maybe you are I'm not are you sure I
00:15:16
almost voted for him yesterday are you being serious well I Saw The Ballot Box I got the ballot in the mail yeah right
00:15:23
and it's he's first by the way on my thing he's first but he's only he running for vice president here and then
00:15:29
I Googled I Googled the Mexican guy that he was running with yeah Rocky de Rocky and then he was a nice old white
00:15:36
man a Mexican man he looked nice yeah and I just I don't know what it was but I just wanted to as a as a laugh and as
00:15:43
a joke uh fill it out well I didn't vote for him yeah I didn't vote for him either I did a write in what do you mean
00:15:50
you can write in your own candidate who you write in I'm not going to tell you who I wrote in but I wrote in somebody
00:15:56
Ron Howard no you love bread no I wrote in Jackie champ I wrote in Jackie CH why does that make you angry see that you deserve that your head fell off I feel bad for vanuel
00:16:08
thank you for these things it sucks that my head broke you broke it I didn't I saw you do it the table broke it this table sucks no I I I wrote in I wrote in
00:16:17
I wrote in a candidate well if you're not going to tell me who it is we we can move on from
00:16:22
that no we can say it tell me it's an actor let me guess mhm red hat Seth Green why no it's not a red why are you going to redheads it's not a red I would just think that you that because for me
00:16:34
right there was a congressman running yeah I never even knew who he was and okay I'm GNA get in trouble for saying
00:16:40
this David rayu no something Fong oh uh um I saw it on the thing yeah I saw so right and I didn't know I didn't hear any I didn't know who any of these people were yeah so I I was with kalila
00:16:53
and I fill that Fong yeah and she goes she caught me and she's like are you voting for because Asian I don't know I
00:16:59
just like his details and his [ __ ] um I like his um stances on the props like I try to make something up yeah way off prop 12 where he says about the thing he really hasn't right on that one y and
00:17:12
she's like you you just [ __ ] voted for him cuz AG like yeah yeah that's fine is that fine do you think black
00:17:18
people didn't vote for Obama because he was do you think there's got to be some black people that just were like I want to vote for Obama cuz he's black right
00:17:23
right there's nothing wrong if you want to vote vote for who you want to vote for who the [ __ ] cares that's what I did do you think wait oh oh you can't vote I
00:17:30
can't no she can't but do you think let me ask you this good do you think that Joe Biden asked Kamala right because
00:17:38
Kanye ran because their name sound alike yes no that's not why that's not why think of my thinking Kam Kanye just
00:17:45
think of my thinking think of my thinking for a second all right all right I'm gonna ask you something ask me please okay is um so you know obviously
00:17:55
this is what the theory or is is that um some I don't know who but somebody encouraged Kanye to R run from the Republican side I would say someone someone in Kanye's head maybe it could
00:18:06
have been somebody it could be somebody in his head right you got to run he's like I gotta run but so that could have
00:18:12
scared people right going he's going to get you know black votes just because he's Kanye right to take away from the
00:18:18
right so do you think that Biden got Kamala because of that fact not because of that fact but I think he got there's a combination of things BLM all kinds of stuff going on can I tell you something yeah yes you're right no are you being
00:18:32
sarcastic don't say that no I think Biden got kamla yes he wanted to get a black woman is a is a good it helps I
00:18:39
think he I I imagine he thinks she's very uh qualified and great and is going to do great yeah but also yeah don't
00:18:46
wouldn't you okay how about this if you were running for president who would be your vice president it would Happ be
00:18:52
somebody completely opposite from me right right Joe Biden's an old white guy he got a young I would get a fat
00:18:59
black man so you'd run with somebody I know I don't want to call him out but he's got funny glasses so you'd run with I'm not going to call him out so your running
00:19:11
mate would be chunko we know chunko so mean he's so chunky though he's that's he just texted me earlier but who' you run with the opposite of me no I couldn't ask um chunko because I
00:19:24
would want somebody with like um that could do it because obviously if I'm running MH I know my frailties I'm not
00:19:32
like Trump where I'm like I know everything right I trust me I know my frailties you go back I know I'll be [ __ ] [ __ ] right so I'm going to need somebody right that you know I mean
00:19:44
could really imagine imagine how big your teleprompter would need to be you can't read the TV that's 3 feet away oh
00:19:49
no I would never read the prompter I would so what would do with speech you improvise every speech every speech all
00:19:55
right here we go a national address right now you're you're the president United oh God not this yes we're going to do it you're going to look right into
00:20:01
your camera right there no no this one right here right that one Straight Ahead which one right here I want you to make a national address to the country to
00:20:07
tell them that we're I'm not going to be funny about it though I want to be real yeah of course that's what they need out of you you're the president because a
00:20:13
lot of times when I do these improvs I I I lean toward funny I'm not going to do I want to be real about this is real all
00:20:19
right okay so I want do not laugh I'm not gonna because it's not funny tell her she's the one that does it all right
00:20:24
I want you to address the nation and tell them that we're what's going on though tell me the scenario can I tell you yeah under attack right now we've
00:20:29
had a terrorist attack okay okay all right where in in New York City in the subway line but can I tell you what was
00:20:35
going on down there what a bunch of terrorists decided to start raping uh okay okay okay that's all you need to know raping and killing people in the subway you're my secretary to defense I just heard Subway this is what this is
00:20:47
what's going to go on Backstage by the way you're my secretary to defense you're telling me okay sir a bunch I got it okay so you need dress of the country
00:20:53
I got it in three youas two New York wait blue oh Guy hey Guy hey Guy I love blue Chu so much honestly you've been using it yeah because I'm getting older right and a lot of times when you're on the go and you have a such a busy
00:21:07
lifestyle right your PE PE right don't react um to the fundamentals of the world hard to keep the blood flowing
00:21:13
down I love chewing on the blue chew right and getting um erectile it's awesome yeah I love it because it's the first chewable approved by the FDA with the same active ingredients as Viagra
00:21:24
and Calis but it's chewable and it's cool and you can only chew stuff cuz you have you have a hard time following stuff right yeah I have to chew because
00:21:30
I only have five teeth that's right five teeth that are working blue Cho is prescribed online by licensed Physicians
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you don't have to go to a doctor's office I know people are like I'm weirded out I'm embarrassed fine fine just get bluechew you don't have to go
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anywhere online right by a licensed physician you don't have to go to the doctor's office like he said they're made in the United States of America you
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don't have to wait in line anymore chips right to your door in a very discreet package by the way so people don't know what you're getting all right they're
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made here right in the United States by the way we have both used it we love it we sometimes send pictures of each other
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to use the promo code bad friends at bluechew it works trust me blu.com bad friends better this is a serious tone um
00:22:28
you know during this pandemic you get depressed and you have to deal with yourself and um for me uh I use better
00:22:34
help it it hooked me up with a licensed therapist and it saved my life guys it's such an easy way to um to get Mindful
00:22:43
and to get spiritual and connected and um you got to take care of your spirit and your mind and uh and better help is
00:22:50
a really good way to do that look for the both of us Bob suffers from uh certain waves of depression and anxiety
00:22:55
so do I we both have other issues in our real life just like everyone that's listening to this no one is impervious
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to feeling bad or down or different you can start communicating to somebody in under 48 hours it's huge they serve
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shame in talking to people I think more people should be using this better help they want you start Liv the most
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betterhelp.com that's betterhelp.com bad [Music] friends herey heing okay you're my secretary def hyhy to the
00:24:03
people you mean I your president have a national address for you okay as we know
00:24:11
our constitution creates a foundation for in which we must react to Global epidemics and also National ones and something horrific occurred in New York
00:24:26
City um I also want to add that um I as president to the people right based on all the Amendments especially the second
00:24:38
one and all of them they're all important by the way the amendments were created right as you know a tool set in which we can look down the line we
00:24:52
have we have 50 plus amendments there are a lot there are a lot all right tell them what happen there we will we'll get to that because I ha to F I know that I have to
00:25:06
fill 30 minutes right but they want to know what happened tell them what happened
00:25:13
sir sir I'm sorry sorry people are dying all right this is no laughing matter I apologize this is no laughting matter right yesterday last last night
00:25:28
last night last night at 2: in the morning so so technically today so technically technically today right although some would assume that it
00:25:41
happened yesterday because it happened in the we [Laughter] hours yesterday at 2 in the morning in the Subways of our great city of New
00:25:52
York which is a part of the United States of America yeah I'm sorry I don't know why sorry what happened sir a gang of terrorists I say
00:26:07
AKA Al-Qaeda AKA you know from Turkey yeah Assan okay Assan and his wife okay Assan and his wife right they
00:26:18
dispatched their cronies aka the Isis right to come into our great city of New York which happens to be in the United States of America right M to terrorize us right with their ideology that's
00:26:32
based on scriptures that don't go against the Bible they do go against the Bible they have a different ideology
00:26:39
although be it we have freedom of religion in this country yes so you may worship any God that as you as you want so I am not judging one's religion or
00:26:50
sect or do domination dominatrix dominatrix right but yesterday at 2 2:32 p.m a.m. of today right in the Subways of our great City you
00:27:05
know they attacked a bunch of um elderly people elderly people in the Subways now what this elderly group of people were
00:27:12
going to a volleyball game they were going to a volleyball tournament right in Brooklyn right they
00:27:19
were going from Queens to Brooklyn right they were this elderly B volleyball team
00:27:24
right they're called the hazmatic and they were figh you know you I mean the crutches crutchies the
00:27:32
crutchies in the the final senior citizen volleyball tournament ch right championships in Brooklyn and they were
00:27:38
waiting for the subway right and as you know at 2:32 in the morning the Subways they don't they're not as active as often right and they come in waves the
00:27:49
sub waves so in the window between you know I mean stop and go between the two Junctions right to the people right
00:27:59
hiri right no I'm not done sh I'm not done yeah a gang of al-Qaeda Assan terrorists right they came in with their masks we had no idea what was going we
00:28:12
have we also have the best police force in the Subways of New York right and they Patrol them you know I mean at
00:28:19
every hour in every station in every point and we our salutes to them so we salute them all the seniors were raped they were raped they were bent over the
00:28:30
benches down there in the Subways in a line right and these Al-Qaeda Isis people right they bent each one of them over they looped their dicks because as as you know American citizens and senior
00:28:41
citizens they have dry Wares because they're getting old right they were raped mhm then murdered then left to rot this morning at 800 in the morning
00:28:54
is when they were found oh God yeah so herei here H God Bless America we will get these perpetrators mhm and so long honestly yeah pretty good I mean as
00:29:09
your secretary of defense pretty good I'm impressed thank you and that's not that's no T prompter you did it no tele
00:29:15
no teleprompter looking in the camera you were very coherent coherent you were fluid I had information lots of
00:29:22
information lot of information uh and I feel like I would have I think Americans would applaud I think we did yeah and I
00:29:28
think the um poll numbers would be favorable through the roof and I think that um I would get another term oh yeah
00:29:36
oh yeah at least I think you might crack the mold and get two or three extra on top of it I wouldn't be able to do it
00:29:42
because of pressure I wouldn't be able to be president like I was I've been watching the show on in netf Netflix
00:29:48
it's called criminal oh yeah you told me what is it is it good well it what it's basically what it is is um the whole up
00:29:55
there's not lot of set pieces right it's basically um in the interrogation room is when it all starts yeah so it'll
00:30:02
start with a guy you know I mean being accused of something right and it's like don't spoil anything I'm not gonna but
00:30:08
it's all the episodes start that way yeah they're in an interrogation room it's like it's like a date line right
00:30:14
and they're being interviewed by and you don't know what you know they're accused of until the dialogue it's really well
00:30:20
written right and a lot of them are um some of them are innocent some of them are not and all episodes revolve around
00:30:27
onek Cas right but I realized by watching Criminal that that's the reason why I don't commit crimes is because I wouldn't be able to lie in those situations ah right I think the pressure
00:30:40
would get to me right and I even if I had a plan I would be so scared in there yeah trying to pretend to make up [ __ ] right to make up [ __ ] that I wouldn't be
00:30:51
able to get my story straight I would crumble they would they would get me well what about this how about okay so
00:30:56
your theory yeah is is that by watching those shows it deters you from doing something bad I yeah I I mean I don't
00:31:03
know no no no there's some validity to it yeah there is validity and I I it's something it's a question I've always asked myself do I not commit crimes
00:31:11
because I'm a good person or do I not commit cor because I just don't want the consequences of it I think the B I'm
00:31:16
going to take the ladder you think so I think because you don't want to get in TR trub yeah but I don't there's also
00:31:22
crimes that I would want to do there's crimes I wouldn't want to do fun okay sure but how fun would it be to rob a bank fun fun yeah but you would but if
00:31:30
they knew that I wasn't going to kill them it wouldn't be fun cuz I wouldn't get the money well how what do you mean
00:31:35
if you went in there without a gun yeah well no I even had a gun right I think they would be able to read the bank
00:31:41
teller not going to hurt them well what if you threaten them with other stuff if you broke into the B like a little little mini B baseball bat yeah a little
00:31:47
tiny like something that wasn't going to kill him just hurt him a little bit well I would have to hide in my jacket right
00:31:53
and they would say um I I come to the front counter yeah or the is that what call I guess yeah yeah I don't know
00:32:00
account yeah it's account bank a teller yeah teller I go to the tell her and she would probably say something like um oh
00:32:05
sir can I help you hi can I help you what are you doing today what do you what what can I do for you today oh you know what I would do I'd be the not guy
00:32:12
oh what's that you know sometimes they say it you sliding me a note sir yeah I would give him a note and say and I
00:32:18
would point to it would probably say on the it would be folded and I would say open okay I just so they would open it
00:32:25
right okay this is wouldn't have to say anything this is a grocer list from Trader Joe's right and I would probably have boxes in there okay like where you
00:32:33
can check oh what I wanted am I okay with no I would ask you like may I have all the money in the bank now oh no oh
00:32:39
you would say that yeah the not boxes I wouldn't want to I wouldn't want to give them the option you okay so you so what
00:32:46
does the Note say oh just on one box yes and that's it hey give me the money yes no I I I would probably say give me the
00:32:53
money I'm strapped with bombs whoa yeah so I'm wearing Overcoat jacket as you can tell right and I'm strapped with 3,000 magnitude bombs 3,000 magnitude
00:33:04
yeah yeah yeah with promatic with promedic toine ice what is toine in there yes toine yeah ISO Valic you know what I mean acid isic VD is in there
00:33:17
yeah and also Nate n Nom Nate yeah some so they wouldn't know no they woulding it up but they wouldn't know right but just in case enough to you know I mean dishevel enough to blow
00:33:31
up the whole city just dishevel the area and you think I say dishevel but what if they what if they give you just a couple
00:33:36
hundred bucks if they're like that's all this bank has you is a credit union I'll go Dunkin Donuts I go straight to Dunkin Donuts
00:33:43
sir you robbed a School Credit Union you got we have $780 here I'll get the 780 okay give the 78 that's pretty good money yeah yeah I think you don't commit crimes because you know better but also
00:33:54
on your point of why you don't commit commit crimes because those shows it's like back when Marilyn Manson and they were like he's making kids do crazy
00:34:01
stuff and and or they're like murderous video games are bad but then they turn out that that's not true even a little
00:34:06
bit that like rates don't go up because of video games or because of television shows in fact it can be the opposite yeah but here's some controversy that
00:34:12
just hit the airwav wait just real quick it's like um does life imitate art or does art imitate life one and the same
00:34:19
right they're intermingling they're intering coexist like the ying and the Yang exactly they coexist here's a good
00:34:25
here's a good one they're bringing back cops Fat Boys they're bringing it back people got
00:34:31
mad they wanted it off now they're now it's back on the air cops the show Cops the longest running [ __ ] show about
00:34:38
police officers in the history of Television cops cops cops do you hear me right yeah I I hear you I no I'm
00:34:46
honestly is it is it a it's a show then they used to be on and they're bringing it back is that what you're saying it
00:34:52
was on forever it was all controversy they took it away because I never saw it how did you not see cops is is is it
00:34:57
like she's not even from here do you know what cops is no say yes yes see is it like an NCIS show where they like no man it's a reality show where cops with real it's real they follow cops with
00:35:09
cameras and they show them like busting people and [ __ ] cool holy [ __ ] I can't
00:35:15
believe you've never seen cops I have to show you a scene from Cops I've seen cops you [ __ ] idiot you know you say
00:35:20
that and then piece of me knows the whole time that you have already seen it and then a piece of me goes he's gonna say that he's seen it to make me feel
00:35:27
stupid but him less uncomfortable no um there's a Bill Hicks joke where he talks about the show Cops about um it's they
00:35:34
were usually in trailer parks uhuh right I remember seeing it as it growing up cops but you watch the show or you just
00:35:40
I loved watching the show it's always the same thing it's different cities you know what I mean so I lied to you it's
00:35:48
yeah it's a bad and I'm very no I I I shifted your mind set and I deceived you a bit and you believed me and I win that
00:35:55
one yes sorry I believed you sorry I believe that you're dumb enough to not know what cops are because I did sync on
00:36:01
that because you are stupid so I know so many things that you're not even aware of name some things that you know that I don't
00:36:07
know there it is ladies and gentlemen no no I right right okay I who created the show
00:36:14
xfiles come on who scanon no yeah scanny Chris Carter yeah Chris Carter you don't know yeah the football player Chris Carter the X XFL some more information I
00:36:24
know that you don't know okay who produced the first four heads albums uh Marcus lowfield don't know no
00:36:31
briano Shin Andino briano briano did yeah yeah my point is I want to say happy birthday to John Mayer because we
00:36:37
share a birthday today and we're Best Buds and we both we love Johnny we love Johnny mayor we love Johnny may what a nice guy hey can can I tell you
00:36:43
something else moving forward um but I highly recommend the show Criminal it's better than cops doubt it doubt it um
00:36:52
Andre is our um our lover boy our fancy be Andre say hi hello sweetheart oh two Monumental things happened with Andre when I was Sicky sickick yeah someone sent me a
00:37:05
clip clip of a guy on Tik Tok and they said it looks exactly like Andre Okay okay you you tell me and Rudy you chime
00:37:13
in if you think this this guy okay look at this guy tell me if he looks like Andre or fancy
00:37:22
b OO o oh oh oh oh oh he's got some moves dude can you push pause for for a second yeah I mean I don't I'm am impressed by Andre look at
00:37:34
that's not how is that not Onre I don't want to be mean I don't want to be mean I do I know I'm going to be okay um I
00:37:42
believe that you know all human beings fall into a certain prototype okay and it's what you do with that prototype is what defines you how
00:37:54
you work with what you've got yeah exactly right so this young man right had the same [ __ ]
00:38:00
up prototype as Andreas so they have the same missing chromosome or whatever it might be right right in the little bald
00:38:08
spot right but this young man decided not to wear um shirts button-up shirts with postcards on it what's what's wrong with that I know I'm just saying right this young man right does that thing
00:38:20
called situps this man right you think he's in better shape than Andre oh yeah he took
00:38:26
um dance classes right he tried to improve right his situation right Andreas Andreas right Andre took the prot the Prototype that he was given by
00:38:37
the Lord himself right and [ __ ] it up a bit why what well I think he did a great job Andreas he's a good-looking
00:38:45
sweet talking smart Bo guy yeah can I eat this no no that's my [ __ ] cake I'm eat it I haven't eaten all day can't have food around you yeah I I I don't eat I
00:38:58
don't like icing as everyone knows that so I'm just going to eat the breading part the cake the breading part the Cake
00:39:04
part yeah it's cake underneath there breading all right well that was that was a guy that looked like
00:39:09
Andreas thanks I love when I do that wait let me show you something what let me show you this we made Andre do a dance video himself to prove to you he looks like
00:39:21
that guy okay he does some yeah now when you say and get ready for his dance skills I mean look you can see these
00:39:27
guys side by side let's side by side and let's play if I you know what dude let let me say something now when I see it
00:39:33
side by side yeah Andreas is skinnier than him yes he is dude you were going at him for no reason Andre is an inshape
00:39:39
fit Andreas come in the room for a second and he dresses well look at how nice Andreas dress this guy in the Rockets Jersey looks like a d come in
00:39:47
the room for a second com all right let's play Let's play both these let's play andreas' first and then we'll play him at the same time here's Andre
00:39:52
dancing look come in the room look at those uh look at that o o stand right there uh-huh uhhuh uhuh I I apologize I attacked you right for no reason at all
00:40:05
now comparing the two videos right couldn't do it without his mouthful by the way couldn't wait till he was done eating to apologize
00:40:12
genuinely now that I see him back I attacked you for no reason I can't help that you grew up in a different far away
00:40:19
land right that different not that far away different cultural experience he's from Mexico City he's from Spain same
00:40:26
thing okay 5 hours away closer than Kore all right oh burd it's closer than Korea okay I come for the I come in I said
00:40:39
come in here to give you real I said come in here I was going to give you a real apologies and ATT me be nice come
00:40:45
on that's crazy talk be nice Bob don't be like that be nice all right I enjoy you I really you do work really hard for
00:40:51
the company and I really like you also do some work for us for Tiger belly a lot of work and I really [ __ ]
00:40:57
appreciate it man okay I love you I love you Andre let's play these side by side
00:41:02
let's see what they look like just to prove that these two gentlemen I don't know how to play I'm just going to play play let's see if it
00:41:08
works ready one two three hold on it's so annoying we can't play music thanks YouTube for [ __ ] being the most annoying thing all right here we go
00:41:19
let's play these side by side okay and Bob let's see let's see how let's see genuinely let's let Rudy jwes judge Rudy
00:41:27
who is a better dancer of these two gentlemen okay ready here we go B B I don't know what do you think rude Andreas is more um um Andreas is cooler Andreas is
00:41:53
cooler there you are that settles it Bob Rudy is the judge let's give it up one time for Andreas Andreas is a lot like a lot of
00:42:04
soft no I think is like like a lot of soft liberals oh boy when they um they want to pick um the one that's obviously not you know not the better what does
00:42:17
that even mean what do what you let me finish what I'm saying right but because she has a sensitivity right she wants
00:42:23
the underdog to win she chooses Andreas uh so you think she feels bad for Andreas that's why but it's it's based
00:42:30
on skill level I don't understand life is yeah Andre is a very skilled man and sometimes people get hurt some people some people that you love aren't good
00:42:41
some people that you know try their best fail and we have to acknowledge that as
00:42:46
a society you're wrong what if you're wrong what do you mean what if you're wrong what if her opinion about his skill set is high and you're
00:42:53
incorrect you ever think about that yeah I think about it all the time I think millions of people really do love Andre and they're begging see look at Rudy's
00:42:59
nauy and they're begging for what I'm about to show you next liquid IV for your soul for your soul and your mind
00:43:06
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00:43:12
water way better than water water's boring liquid IV is delicious uh the immune support is what I like Bobby
00:43:19
likes the sleep because it helps him go to bed bed time yeah yeah when he's staying up till 3:34 in the morning playing video games 6 6 okay get the
00:43:26
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00:43:31
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00:43:37
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00:43:43
easy to open Tiny rip and right into the water it's really good man uh we both enjoy it I like to use it during the middle of the day he likes it at night I like it because I like to have long days filled with dealing with Bob and uh it's
00:43:56
very much with you I hate water yeah well water by I drink it but with liquid IV I enjoy it you like it then oh yeah Water by itself is boring boring very boring it's not fun at all yeah this
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00:44:37
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hydration get it in your body today liquid iv.com promo code is bad friends door Dash oh my God hey Andy
00:44:52
yes um uh door Dash during this pandemic has been so vital my surval every single day
00:45:00
sometimes three times a day I know it's true trust me I love door Dash between never ending laundry cycles and incoming
00:45:05
emails you've got plenty on your to-do list give yourself one less thing to do to worry about and let door Dash take
00:45:12
care of your next meal or your next three meals look you want Chinese food you want pizza you want Thai food you
00:45:18
want sushi a FR yo you want a froo you want Boba you can get it all on door Dash uh we're continuing to support restaurants in our community safely there's thousands of people on door Dash
00:45:29
restaurants that need your help to stay open get the get the app download it now it's so easy man all you do is go to
00:45:36
your phone beep boop boop download the app and what happens Bob they bring food where to your home directly to your home
00:45:43
it's extremely easy the door Dash app choose what you want to eat order the food 300,000 Partners in the US Puerto Rico Canada Australia support your local
00:45:49
restaurants what's your favorite to order what's your favorite little restaurant oh I love the Cheesecake Factory oh cheesecake I love Wendy's
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Wendy's P oh I like chip yeah many of your favorite restaurants are on there already just grab that app if you don't
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have it what are you doing right now our listeners can get $5 out their first order of $15 or more and zero delivery
00:46:07
fees for their very first month when you download the door Dash app and enter the code bad friends $5 off your first order
00:46:12
and zero delivery fees for a first month when you download the door Dash app in the app store enter that code bad friends it helps the show out we love
00:46:18
door Dash don't forget that's code bad friends for five bucks off your first order with door Dash Andre has gotten a
00:46:23
lot of requests from our fans to be on only fans they want to see a little bit more of how sexy this guy is and it's
00:46:29
only fans only fans is a website that people use to sell themselves to either like sometimes they show nudity sometimes it's like secret content you know you can't get anywhere else where
00:46:41
only fans a lot of a lot of women do it and they put like actresses and stuff nudes they put like nudes and stuff up
00:46:47
there oh I want to know what only only fans only fans I want to look at that so our very own Andre fancy B has his only
00:46:54
fans and uh would you like to see his only fans content we're going to give the first video away for free okay and
00:46:59
then after that people got to pay you got to go to andreas' account and pay Andreas what's the name of the account to search for on only fans come check
00:47:06
out my only fans at fancy B fans check it out let's let's see you want to see fancy be's watch it's an app yeah dude
00:47:13
only fans I'm gonna download it let's do stuff at like bad friend can we do a bad friends one only fans well we want to
00:47:19
promote fancy B first oh yeah okay look look okay all right you ready there is no um wait hold
00:47:27
on it's a bad friend's day today so which shirt should I wear let's see what shirt look at all those shirts
00:47:40
Bob two Santino not enough words in that one maybe too many words in this ones um yeah no oh yep I think we have a winner just
00:48:01
enough words this one's just right now before breakfast uh we'll play my favorite part of last week's bad friends cannot stand George and I miss
00:48:13
Andre cannot stand George and I miss Andre cannot stand George and I miss Andre cannot stand George and I miss Andre feels good
00:48:26
well he's having a little croissant Bob oh that's how we you see look at fancy real fancy this is a good
00:48:34
croissant anyway I think I'm ready for another bad friend's day see you my only fun next week
00:48:43
ciao so sign up for only fans if you're looking for Content like that no that's hot no it's it's just Doom it's just.com and watching you learn about it while I'm trying to show you fancy bees has
00:48:53
been really [ __ ] frustrating why are you trying to learn authorize only fans to access your
00:48:58
account yes let them access whatever they need us your user okay mhm is this how we're going to spend the next couple of minutes watching you learn only fans so it says save changes my birth ches
00:49:12
it's my birthday okay changes with well let me just hold on hold hold on yeah almost there almost there yeah so um Everybody um tell me something
00:49:23
yeah um let's get serious I don't want to to talk about it I've talked about it too
00:49:31
much I know we're not going to talk about the things you've talked about okay okay I I I'm I'm I'm I'm GNA ask
00:49:39
you because you know it's like you know um I was watching that show that movie um not hot zones it was the one
00:49:50
with um Dustin Hoffman uh Tootsie RMA [Laughter] maybe maybe no it's about the diseases
00:50:03
so um um diseases yeah is it hot zones or what's it called outbreak heartbreak outbreak maybe he's saying it loud hot break outbreak it's it's it's a it's a plague there's a plague going on it's in
00:50:16
some outbreak outbreak MH thank you and um you know when you watch a movie like that you go you think to yourself oh man that disease is [ __ ] scary I wonder what it feels like to have it right and
00:50:30
you know Co came along right which is like you know mysterious scary it's a mysterious um disease yeah and um I don't have you're the only person I
00:50:43
think that I know that I'm close with that I can ask these kind of questions because of out of curiosity yeah right
00:50:51
so um I'm just going to ask you some um yes and no questions shoot and then you can answer them for me okay okay when you're in the height of your
00:51:01
covid journey mhm can you still make love could you get it up and have a desire to yes of course because you're a man uh but you can't make love to
00:51:14
anybody you can you can you can pound your PUD okay good that's something I talked about public now when you're in
00:51:19
the height of your Co right are you eating things yeah you get hungry but you can't taste anything do you also
00:51:26
that's real no taste no smell smell can't smell it that's really that's real mhm wow so if you're eating like
00:51:32
um um a roast beef sandwich why exactly yeah why am I eating that when I'm sick ex you would be eating it I'd be eating soup soup soup Ramen peanut butter and jelly right stuff that me meat and
00:51:45
potatoes simple stuff not meat and potatoes at all I just a term that was a term simpler than meat and potatoes right um but not meat and potatoes it
00:51:52
should be called peanut butter and jelly peanut butter um so let me ask you this um
00:51:57
um is it worse than the flu uh my personal experience felt just like a flu to it felt like what I've had when I had a flu so if there was no if there was nothing if we've never had
00:52:11
covid right and you got this You' just be like oh I have a nasty flu if we didn't know what Co was I would go man
00:52:17
I've got this weird [ __ ] up flu it feels weird Okay so it was then it's different than a flu it's different but this but simp things mocked each other like like tired very tired like the flu
00:52:29
achy body aches for a day two days what about the lung stuff people talk about so that that affects some people I didn't get pneumonia I didn't get a lung infection I mean as far as I know I
00:52:41
didn't have restricted breathing and I didn't have pressure on my chest which people say so I didn't have that but
00:52:47
I've heard that that's [ __ ] bad right but mine felt like um your [ __ ] someone beat the [ __ ] out of your head oh
00:52:54
headaches bad headaches like when it's like in that movie The Dark the third um Dark Knight where um Batman the third
00:53:01
Dark Knight which one yeah when he punches Bane right in the maskie and remember the little comes and he goes right is that what that genuinely
00:53:13
hurt that really is that what it felt like yeah oh that's yeah I was it's very banish yeah how very banish yeah how
00:53:20
long did it last though the sickness the like feeling sick is a probably a week and some change
00:53:26
wow but then after that you're just kind of residual effects from being sick because you're lazy and you're tired so you're even more tired because you're
00:53:32
being lazy and would you want it again huh would you ever want it again what a dumb question would I want to get a [ __ ] virus again no I didn't want to get it in the first place it's just a
00:53:43
yes or no question man that's [ __ ] crazy sorry ask sorry ask me again would you want it again no what a dumb
00:53:50
question okay that was a dumb question no I don't want I would filter these questions do do I um is it one of those
00:53:56
things where I was I tell you what you know what scares you the most is that you don't know enough right when you get
00:54:03
when I get a sinus infection when I get all the time I get them three four times a year I know what's happening I know
00:54:08
what's to come so there's a element of unknown fear yeah and I don't think and I don't think speculation in the media helps either because everyone's like [ __ ] what if I what if I get what if I get what if I get what if I get right
00:54:19
and and it perpetuates hits people in different ways I hear so it's like some people it's really really bad yeah some
00:54:25
people end up in a coma my buddy's Mom I'm sorry my buddy's Aunt went into a coma that's crazy yeah yeah and when she came back out she couldn't speak English
00:54:36
wow she spoke Japanese that's that's well she learned a new language I know weird you can learn it's a difficult
00:54:41
language to learn no the poor woman she literally came but she survived thank God but when she came out um yeah she
00:54:46
had to relearn I mean it's [ __ ] insane it's it's so sad it's disgusting so some people are luckier than others
00:54:51
that's are you mad at the guy that gave it to you yeah no cuz you know what what it's 30 million [ __ ] people dud no I'll be honest with you how could
00:55:04
you I have to throw my two can I throw my two cents in should throw them on the table number one it
00:55:10
disrupted our business yeah the pod pod yeah it did it was tough doing it from home I took it personally yeah because
00:55:16
now my friend's sick I I'm going through unknown questions right you know do I have to do one with Eric Griffin you know I mean do I have have to team up with your me chunko over here
00:55:29
right so I'm think I'm laying in bed going we can call we called um fat friends oh I don't know whatever you know because I'm fat too right that's true right so that's number one and
00:55:40
number two I'm like I hope he doesn't die yeah I hope I didn't die too yeah yeah that would be sad yeah and then
00:55:46
also then also it disrupted then we we when we did the podcast I mean granted you know this the podcast we've done
00:55:53
with with you sick right we did the best we could with those we had some fun but
00:55:58
what's great about you and I together I need to see you we have to be in the same because you have a certain energy
00:56:03
right that I respond to and in the the three that we did you know with you you without you um it felt didn't feel the
00:56:11
same for me but you did get some enjoyment you told me after the fact on the phone that you like doing it with your with your brother it felt really
00:56:16
good well I hadn't seen Steve since the pandemic so how nice so that was nice so this though so Corona I would rather not
00:56:21
you get Corona for that sometimes you got to get Corona to bring Brothers together now will you go to Hawaii when
00:56:27
I go I don't know I'm thinking about we're trying to plan it cuz I start shooting Davey season 2 when you go to Hawaii yeah it's hard you know where are
00:56:35
you staying I don't know well tell the people so they can come say hi well I'm staying in in Honolulu somewhere but I
00:56:42
I'll have days off when we when we find out what hotel Bob is in we're going to tell you guys because we want the fans of Hawaii to be able to come say hi to
00:56:48
you no not in the people person you love people everyone I'm going to tell you on
00:56:54
my Twitter what hotel he's in I'd like you to go say hi to him and bring him gifts during the day in the hotel we can drop off gifts at the um I want them to
00:57:02
wait outside of your room so when you wake up they can have gifts for you in the hallway oh like Henry La you know Henry La is Henry LA and put some rose
00:57:07
petals on the floor when you leave is she going Rudy are you going to ha Havi um I don't know yet that's a
00:57:15
no it's up to it's a yes obviously everything's you know it's so funny Rudy it's so it's so funny you know it's like everything's up to her well I have no
00:57:26
saying anything if if Auntie kalila goes um you like she orders food right she'll
00:57:32
go it's good huh jwes and every her does it could be a pile of dog [ __ ] Juliana
00:57:40
will go it's great auntie kalala right what if she likes taste of it I no if I order something right it's good right
00:57:48
okay oh I never I never said that I never said that yeah yeah yeah you never aside with me why don't you and you never you're never on my side be honest Jules is it because you like atie Kila
00:58:00
way more you just genuinely like they're blood they they share blood doesn't matter there's people that I'm blood with that I don't like as much as I like
00:58:05
strangers that's true that's a true point is it because you really love her more than you love no I love them both
00:58:13
equally that's impossible and that's a lie everyone that says that is such a lie yeah when someone say about their
00:58:18
kids like I love my kids the same no they don't no they [ __ ] don't they hate one of them for sure yeah so be
00:58:23
honest what is it really say it say she she's got it loaded up she just doesn't want to unload say it be honest this is a time to be honest he wants it I want it okay I love I think
00:58:36
Kila a little bit more mhm God that hurts oh [ __ ] that hurts so bad I know it did oh [ __ ] that's now now now now instead of taking this negatively the way she did that oh the way the way she
00:58:48
did it it was really honest yeah don't take this negative Bob how about this I he hey can I say this what can you do to
00:58:53
beat her love there's no way I'm going to say this money get I already know that yeah right but you
00:58:59
have to understand that I know that and I'm trying yeah he is right and you don't are you're not giving me the opportunity I do yeah and um you know I
00:59:15
I'll I'll add another thing even though you hurt me just now all right that I will continue to look at this finger I
00:59:22
will continue look how tiny your pinky is I know I will continue to try for the rest of my life even though it's moot even though I know okay that it's
00:59:38
never going to work in my favor that you're going to betray me wow right and that um it's a love I'll never get
00:59:53
okay are you okay with that I love Tito Bobby and I side with him sometimes never sounds like never she's a liar you're a [ __ ] hey hey hey hey be nice Mong be
01:00:06
nice be nice sorry I apologize do you um are you still having trouble in your sleep by the way I have sleep apia no I know but are you using a machine now no cuz when we talked you said you were
01:00:17
going to get it checked out you didn't yeah I I I'll wake up at 6:00 in the morning not be able to breathe I know but Bob you got to go see somebody if I
01:00:24
die I die okay that's true and I'm at a point now because you have to understand that imagine dying in your 49 I know but
01:00:31
you don't want to die inep you think you think to yourself when you turn almost 50 I'm almost 50 you think to yourself
01:00:36
right um You kind of start googling when did this person die right yeah and I always have a thing like you know Keith Richards he's alive I know oh but he's
01:00:48
my like meter oh when he dies you die no when he dies I'll know that's pretty much around the time I'll die I think
01:00:55
you think you live the same life that Keith Richard did I think he he snorted his dad you know that yeah did he mixed
01:01:00
in his dad's ashes did cocain Dad no it's still in the box right and he snorted it he's done every drug in the
01:01:06
book he smoked cigarettes until he was like n you know whatever right and he's still walking around so he's my meter
01:01:12
like you know oh he's still alive I have a shot okay what about guys that just did it's like I'll be honest with you
01:01:19
you know um I always thought that if I got covid that I would die immediately no but when Trump went got through it it kind of gave me like hope like I can live through it
01:01:31
right it's just it's kind of like that yeah but you still when you're when you turn when you get toward 50 you
01:01:38
literally start thinking about death a lot and your mortality I maybe not everybody but I I think are you gonna die I don't know I almost di this now not every second of
01:01:50
every day it's it's every once in a while all right how do you how do you want to die not in your sleep oh for sure my sle
01:01:56
why Bob I don't want to [ __ ] die walking down the like walking around I do hey John yeah I don't want to that
01:02:03
but I want to know I'm dying I want to have the moment of oh my God I'm dying I don't want to just be in bed
01:02:09
like having a dream and then and then die in my yeah if I'm in a dream right and I die I'm not what what it's like
01:02:17
being in a blackout drunk and ding but you'll never know that you died you're not going to know anything even if you
01:02:22
die after you die cuz if you know no but if you know you died when you died you shot you knew it was real right but if
01:02:28
there if there's nothingness if there's no God and there's no Heaven what if you
01:02:33
already died in your sleep and this is all just the afterlife well then I I would
01:02:42
have what if dude what if you've already died that's my point I want to see that I did it I want to go I want to see that
01:02:49
I'm like oh God I'm dying and I'm going to die die and then if there's no afterlife and there's if you're a good Christian like does matter okay if there for instance if I'm in my sleep right
01:03:02
and I open my eyes and I go holy [ __ ] I'm on a cloud hanging out with Cleopatra I've said that before right
01:03:09
and like um I would love to see um Coleman Ronnie Coleman no what's his name Coleman Different Strokes oh Gary Coleman that's
01:03:21
right so Cleopatra right Cleopatra G Gary Coleman Gary Gary Goldman is that no Gary Gary Coleman Gary Coleman yeah the um Carri golaw the television little
01:03:32
person TV LP yep and I'd be hanging out there on a cloud and I'd open my eyes right yeah and I'd be like did I die and
01:03:40
then Gary col go yeah buddy you did you know what I mean no you know what he he [ __ ] that joke up why I'm Gary Coleman
01:03:47
okay ask me if you you're dead did I die what' you talk about Willis uh I was that's to it didn't work
01:03:54
didn't work okay [Laughter] I love it when bits don't work so funny is that fun so fun that little moment when I've done that on stage way like
01:04:06
you right you go I know didn't work 100% that this joke is going to work right and you you you you when you're driving to the club right yeah you get excited and then when the guy's in front of you
01:04:18
on stage you just kind of go hurry up I have I have a new bit right and you get up on stage and you see the punchline
01:04:24
and it doesn't work and it's compl completely silent it that feeling is the [ __ ] worst it's the best actually I think it's so fun and I what would what do you do in that situation I ackn I
01:04:35
acknowledge it you have to acknowledge it I go wow on the way here yeah yeah I thought that was good and you guys
01:04:42
really let me know how bad it was I would even go into like I was I would say everything I just said before coming even doing to this bit right now right I
01:04:48
was excited to come up here right and wow and if they don't laugh at that right you're now in a hole well then you
01:04:55
usually go I've seen you you usually go oh [ __ ] you guys and then you turn and then they love you again snap snap yeah
01:05:02
so look I'm being serious you need to go get sleep apnea help no Bob kalila doesn't want to wake up with you dead because you couldn't breathe in the middle of the night what an annoying way to find your but all all that happens is
01:05:13
I don't die right yeah correct you don't die I didn't die yet I know but if you get how you then you you definitely won't die happen Okay so what I'm saying is is that you know I'll just continue
01:05:25
this way of doing things roll because it didn't happen okay right okay it's just
01:05:31
hearsay it's weird to be so safe about Co but not care about dying in your sleep cuz one of the two you have much
01:05:37
more control over cuz I know I have friends that have it I have a friend that has to sleep with the breathing
01:05:43
machine Joe Koy he has it oh yeah but he's in pretty good shape too no he has the thing he has to sleep with the all night long that's what they
01:05:53
hear so what's worse you die in your sleep or her listening to the hum of that machine she probably wants you dead
01:05:59
that's what happens people just unplug the machine what that's what'll happen you could fill can you do that fill it with stuff can you fill can you get murdered that way you can fill it with
01:06:13
like toxic fumes yeah I imagine like you just light a cigarette and you stick it and you blow it in you'd love that if I
01:06:19
just oh yeah would be great that would be great you could smoke while you sleep yeah you need to get help I'm being
01:06:24
serious it's so dangerous well I mean maybe I'm waiting for an intervention I'll do a thing on the show yeah a
01:06:30
friend of mine so let me let me say this a friend of mine you need to eat your cupcake is
01:06:36
there more I don't know dude I didn't bring them it's my [ __ ] birthday you should have brought me some
01:06:44
[ __ ] my friend Dave from my show Davey that you make fun of Dave got me a [ __ ] beautiful cake a big beautiful
01:06:51
cake he dropped off to my house okay that's that's different because I'm way more friends with you than I am with him I'll tell you why it's different I've
01:06:57
known you for a decade I'll tell you why it's different please um like you know when I go to
01:07:03
Hawaii I'm going to do Magnum PI oh my God are you plugging your [ __ ] Magnum I'm I'm GNA give you an example please
01:07:09
let me get there please God and when they text me right Aloha like if Jay Hernandez the star texts me Aloha how's it going I respond to him
01:07:22
right away cuz he doesn't know that I'm a piece of [ __ ] yet well he's GNA when this comes out that's what I'm saying is
01:07:28
that because you're working with Davey right so you you put on the best face possible you and I are already friends
01:07:34
he know Dave knows me too yeah but you're not there yet with him okay so you're saying because we're real friends
01:07:41
you don't care about me I know I care so more deeply about you more deeply than you wouldn't want to do J we don't we're
01:07:47
we we're Beyond gifts we're past gestures of niceties no we don't you and I have an internal [ __ ] did I go to
01:07:54
v's and get you a cake yeah and I'll tell you one thing it wasn't good you didn't eat it I don't eat Von's cakes
01:08:02
you just did hold on time out time out time out was it good though you want another one pretty good yeah it was from
01:08:12
V it was got he got it from Vons for real got me really Andre is it from Vons it is yeah it is let me ask you
01:08:19
something you know is and and this is and V isn't bad stop it's not it's not joh John's is worse it goes John it goes John's Vons no first of all it goes
01:08:30
smart and final John Let's rate the LA ones all right go gson at the top at the top Gelson's is number one right and then there's a Pavilions Pavilions is pretty close to Whole Foods so what's
01:08:44
what's Whole Foods top then but it's to the it's not even in the gr it's its own thing it's own thing it's Amazon it's Amazon but so it goes It goes Gelson's
01:08:51
gson Pavilion Pavilions Safeway Safeway no no Ralph's no no no I think I think Ralph's in safe I think because rock and roll Ralph's in Hollywood is scary it's great though I saw I saw a guy when you
01:09:03
see like Marilyn Manson there like eating an apple that's fun but then you go there in the middle of the night it's on Sunset one time I was going there
01:09:09
before I went to the store I saw a homeless guy cuz they're all over in that little strip right there walked in I love that walked in grabbed a
01:09:15
newspaper and spit at one of the employees I love it all right yeah I've seen like monest Mouse there the band
01:09:21
yeah yeah I've run into them there who else I've um I've seen Marilyn man there eat an apple he's just eating an apple
01:09:27
inside the Ralphs yeah he wasn't even paying for I think he was just eating it in the fruit section he can't afford to no he was
01:09:33
just he was doing one of those things where Marilyn like everyone was like oh my God holy [ __ ] it's Marilyn man he's eating an apple he's like I got to eat
01:09:38
this apple he would never think that he would be eating an apple you would think that he'd be eating a human heart like a bat yeah or something right but he's
01:09:45
eating a fresh you know it was not even a red one imagine you went up to him you're like hey yeah why are you eating an I thought you'd be eating like a
01:09:51
human heart Mar Manson's like listen dude I had to years of doing that kind of stuff
01:09:56
I really had to curb it my doctor said my blood pressure is through the roof I've seen there I've seen dice there
01:10:01
Andrew Dice Clay yeah I mean yeah but we see him at The Comedy Store too that's not like tell you who
01:10:07
I've seen there all right give me someone and then there other actors like Spanish actors I've seen there who I
01:10:13
don't know their names but they're like like oh that guy's on the moart show on Hulu oh that guy yeah oh that guy's good
01:10:20
yeah why can't think of his name I don't know that's why I didn't say it oh [ __ ] yeah sorry that guy that guy's good yeah
01:10:25
he's seen fancy B know say it again we can't hear youal oh dude you know what his [ __ ]
01:10:31
he's doing the accent got got to get I hate when they do that annoying yeah give me the [ __ ] American version of
01:10:36
whatever you just said Gabrielle Garcia Gabriel Garcia someone like that yeah he's
01:10:41
like why do they do that on the the Rollings thing I know stop it can you roll g g I've never been able to roll
01:10:50
no can't do my tongue am I good fancy be or no ready goodi so yeah so goes Ralph
01:10:57
and then what what then Vons Ralphs Ralph's then Vons and then John's John's and then Smart and Final Smart and Final and then the last one is where do you
01:11:09
shop George Trader Jo's swish yeah swish yeah where is it George what's the bottom I do vs usually he does Von yeah yeah yeah yeah smart and finals probably
01:11:22
dead last unless or 99 Cents Store does that count that's not they don't have fruit there they have groceries no yes
01:11:28
they do dude they sell produce when I first moved to LA my old roommate used to buy eggs there and I was so scared
01:11:34
yeah I was like 99 cent eggs for 12 eggs yeah that was so scary I mean I ate them
01:11:40
do you ever eat at places like it says Chinese food and donuts and La has so many places that
01:11:47
says Pizza kebabs Mediterranean Sushi yeah yeah and you're like I will never eat that no you do too many things Master one thing there's one place on the way to the there's one place here in
01:11:58
the valley that's called H Salt Fish and Chips I've eaten there I loved I used to live right I used to live on Camario
01:12:06
yeah right there right there by the way terrible the worst place on Earth yeah it the fish first of all I don't even
01:12:12
know if it's fish not fish yeah look at the reviews on Yelp oh I don't even know we need I need keep talking about it cuz
01:12:18
I'm going to bring it also you know it's supposed to be you know it's supposed to be fish and chips right that's all yes yeah um why is it wet
01:12:26
like it the breading everything's wet hold on H Salt Fish and Chips this is it right here H Salt Esquire Esquire oh my God it's called H Salt Esquire that's what the the nerve of this [ __ ] place
01:12:38
all right uh it's a chain H Salt Fish and Chips no this is it right here oh no that's in saltel oh wow is it really
01:12:45
chain oh my God yeah well I well maybe some of them are better than that one I can't imagine look at this one this is a photo on the Yelp page okay that's not
01:12:57
okay that looks like there's no fish in there by the way that looks like fish and chips as one that's a fish and chip
01:13:03
fish and chip yeah yeah that's fish and chip oh there first of is that supposed to be the French fry or the [ __ ] fish
01:13:09
bar this is this is their Yelp Page look at that photo insan that afterward what
01:13:14
is that right there I don't even know what is look at that discoloration what part of the fish is that that's black
01:13:20
that's its heart yeah all right so let's see some of these reviews from the fishing chips oh there's some good ones
01:13:25
uh okay but let's go to the bad ones that's going to that's the only oh whoa whoa that's a five star five star
01:13:31
baby let's sort by newest she was high there they are they always put best up first Yeah Wendy says worst customer service ever the owner screams and treats every customer so bad the day I
01:13:44
went in she decided she was going to first have my food Asian by the way no [ __ ] she said he screams and treats
01:13:49
everyone so bad but but based on that please don't assume that he's Asian I did I'm just telling you he is I've been
01:13:56
there I know because I read what it just said I know but what you're doing is a racist you know how is that racist I've
01:14:02
never been yelled at by a black or a white owner of a restaurant I've only been yelled at by Asian owners in restaurants generally they are Asian
01:14:08
right always but don't not always but hurry up and pick up every time that's not it number two now yeah every time
01:14:16
why is it this when you're in a Chinese restaurant right and there's so calm when they're talking to her but when they turn to their so this is what I get
01:14:23
would you like to hear about our specials right yeah um they tell you the special yeah I'll I have number three okay number three and then she'll she'll
01:14:29
he'll turn around go that da right and kind turn back why do they do that because they need to communicate loudly to the back of the kitchen how about this take the [ __ ] order right and walk back there now let
01:14:44
he yell let him bark baby let him bark okay so so yeah he is I've been there chines the day I went in decided uh
01:14:51
first it's a woman on this one she first going to decide to have my food photographed and then packed it up expected me to be happy with it then she
01:14:56
didn't even want to give me my money back when I didn't want the food horrible customer service so he she wanted to take photos of it it looked so
01:15:03
terrible what happened H Salt the H Salt is off the building by the way that's true the letter H is falling off the
01:15:09
building it's very funny prices have doubled fish is a burnt rectangle lady will yell at you to put
01:15:15
the food in the bag I said I was eating outside of the table she ran over to take it away from a tray so I could Carri a cardboard box wow this can't be an H Sal franchise something is wrong is
01:15:22
it 80 cents extra for some tartar sauce G yeah regardless of Co this lady is very rude loud loud and yells why this is great everything is overpriced
01:15:34
she tricks you into making things a combo and charges you for sauces well that's good that's just good business
01:15:40
yeah yeah that's craf business I was there with my friend for lunch two fish sandwiches of fries the worst sandwich I've ever had in my life bad service this is mean we should go there
01:15:47
and write a really good review I think I want to I want to eat it though this is one of the worst quality fish and chip spots in the West
01:15:53
Coast zero seasonings disappointed I am British this is valid okay yeah let me read it like this guy benj uh Benjamin V disappointed I'm British and this was
01:16:05
not tasty chips were French fries and no chiffy chips I don't want [ __ ] yeah fish was a
01:16:12
fin rank tangle barely any fish i' F the other at s and this is not good yeah but
01:16:18
then he took pretty good photos that looks okay this is my favorite chips with french fries and no chiffy chips well clue in Benjamin we eat chips here
01:16:31
uh in a bag those are Doritos we eat fries and those are french fries not chippy chips Ben this is good one
01:16:38
haven't said haven't had it since I was seven great service great food thumbs up do you think that's her at night writing
01:16:44
these that's her Chinese lady this is her she's like get a picture of Mexican boy put it up there Constance that's
01:16:50
five from her yeah Donnie is three so it's not it's it's not too bad but it does scare me on the way on the way through is there a good place in LA to get uh fish and chips I've heard on the
01:17:02
West Side they've got good spots but I don't go near the beach Connie and teds you it's a ripoff I it's look it's good
01:17:09
food but Connie teds why am I paying 80 bucks for it's a great place it's a it's good Connie tent is great I've had fish
01:17:15
and chips there it's good I used to live up literally around the corner for I get it right and the CH and the [ __ ] sushi place next door yeah don't go
01:17:21
there you know why why my buddy got [ __ ] worms from it exactly not kidding right got worms count tons T is
01:17:26
good it's good yeah it's good you you you're the type of person right I cook my own fish okay but you're the type of
01:17:32
person I cook my own fish can I just say what kind of type of person you are the guy who cooks his own fish yeah you are that type as well right but you're the
01:17:39
type right that orders at a place like Connie and Tad's sure right and um then you get the bill right and you go geez pricey huh Whoppers man sure wasn't
01:17:54
worth it you know the price though man it's just fish and you know I mean some some
01:18:00
flavorings and some and whatnot but why is it and then you're the type of person that probably goes we tell the waiter
01:18:07
like he has no [ __ ] control over it right you'll be like wow man I you you probably do a joke I had to mortgage my house on this one do some sort of joke right and they're like what do you mean
01:18:18
he like I mean an arm and a leg and a thigh take everything well can't be an arm and a leg and a thigh your thigh is
01:18:24
on your leg already yeah yeah the joke wouldn't work right it doesn't make any sense that you would say right right
01:18:29
that's you right and then you probably like stand up and make a ped D look at the tables yeah yeah
01:18:36
boy there something I don't know what the joke is you're that type of person though what you talk about
01:18:44
Willis okay so check this out I'm want to play this for you this is [ __ ] insane the reason I need you to get help
01:18:49
with your sleep apnea okay is cuz they have these apps now that measure how you sleep when you sleep and also they can
01:18:56
record you if you talk in your sleep okay a good friend of mine talked in his sleep it's voice activated he leaves it
01:19:02
next to his bed okay and it just picks up [ __ ] in the middle of the night so when he starts it turns on you need to get this
01:19:10
[ __ ] thing listen to this this is so this is real though this is 100% real comedian no this is a friend of mine
01:19:15
from back home okay good this is insane you can fake it you know uh this is good
01:19:25
fck [ __ ] be beting me [ __ ] what [ __ ] there's no way 100% swear to God in my life he sent me a dozen of them the app logs it so they put it next to
01:19:45
your bed when you're sleeping and it just turns on the moment you start it starts do he not listen I go what the [ __ ] is wrong with he does that's why
01:19:51
he's scared he wants to go get help because he's talking his sleep too much Fu crazy I got to get the app what's it
01:19:57
called oh yeah [ __ ] prove list [ __ ] this thr this wow he's like mad in his sleep yeah he swears a lot too he
01:20:10
does yeah that 200 that well do give you kick those like no problem bro this this this sounds it
01:20:26
sounds a little bit like he's speaking Yeah like a language almost except number 200 that he's drunk
01:20:37
maybe he's drunk in the dream sober no but he's in oh in his dream he's drunk yeah in the dream he's at a bar that's
01:20:44
good and he's whispering to like you know some old you the regular the old lady that sit sah that's an alcoholic
01:20:51
and he's telling some story to her funny do that it could be it listen to it again you just say here think of it in
01:20:57
that way and then doesn't give you kick it makes sense yeah yeah yeah he's wasted what is
01:21:10
he in this one she has to walls pull r time do it oops oh I know what he is I know what he's doing what he's
01:21:37
teaching wait in front of a class do you want to know how C you you're G to think I'm insane what he used to teach ESL
01:21:44
yeah that's what he's doing that this is seriously swear to God yeah that's so creepy that's what I heard he's teaching
01:21:52
but he's not he's walking around the class right and he's telling a student something because he you know you know
01:21:58
where he lived out of college I don't know who you this person is a good friend of mine guess where he lived out of college if he Tau ESL he taught ESL
01:22:04
English as a second language where newshire if I'm referencing you as my friend where do you think he lived when he taught ESL English as a second language New York out of this country
01:22:17
Spain where do you think he lived Jules I don't know out of this country exactly BF CH exactly
01:22:25
New York CHS thank you Andre South Korea exactly [ __ ] South Korea so he's telling this to a student a South Korean student
01:22:37
mhm that's why he's walking around the class he's not walking but that's what he's that's something banging in his bed
01:22:43
exactly that's what he's doing she has to walls pull her R tell it oops Yeah oops you got the answer wrong that's what oops you got
01:22:59
the answer wrong is that really what that is yeah huh we got to help my buddy though isn't that [ __ ] wild talking
01:23:04
in his sleep but what's the ABS because I want to do it sleep talk how obvious how [ __ ] annoying and obvious sleep
01:23:11
talk is the name of the app thank you for being a bad friend wo woo yeah woo