00:00:00
you two are bad friends who are these two idiots a white dude and an Asian
00:00:05
dude you two are disgusting you two or something we're
00:00:10
bad friends yummy Koreans came up to me and said what dude bad friends Bobby Lee
00:00:16
is like my idol man I'm a leader of trust me I know she doesn't respect me right disgusting but what I wanted to re
00:00:22
tell you right now is I'm a leader of RP recogniz all right recognized all right and if there was a war God bless it be
00:00:30
bless God bless not happen God bless be not happen right you would be in big
00:00:35
trouble right I'm got to tell you another thing young lady tell you're this is you're not going to believe this
00:00:41
this is against you you're not going to believe this you're not going to believe so we get in the car right to drive here today and she goes Bobby I go what she
00:00:48
goes if Andrew not wearing a mask right I'm going to say something I was wearing
00:00:53
a mask I understand that I understand that and lucky you were because right yeah yeah yeah she go I go what are you
00:00:58
going to do she go iy I had a enough I have a enough you have enough I have I
00:01:04
had a enough you have it up here I I'm going to comont he goes I'm going to confront him you're going to confront me
00:01:10
you're going to you're going to confront Andrew she yeah he better be wearing mask or I confront you know oh yeah do
00:01:16
it now I yeah you did yeah you did I did why don't you confront me right now
00:01:22
comont do the confront come on come me right now I didn't say that okay so if
00:01:27
you wasn't wearing a mask right you weren't going to say say anything cuz you promised the lady no I would wait
00:01:33
for you to say it what what you coward coward oh yeah
00:01:39
coward coward I would wait for you to say it yeah and that's why the Japanese
00:01:44
took over their Island right I wait I wait for the us to help us you're weak
00:01:50
you you couldn't even confront me right now it's unbelievable what she says around the house you know what I mean
00:01:55
like I'm going to get here I'm going to say something what yeah yeah and it's and it's like what yeah it's a lot
00:02:03
of dude I'm so mad at you yeah I know I know and you know what to to think that
00:02:08
I brought you a gift today oh my God to think I I brought you a gift oh another
00:02:14
knife look at this yeah yeah yeah look at the size of this thing that's a nice one yeah you want to play with it is it real yeah it's real will I cut myself
00:02:21
yeah oh my God it's sharp it's real dud this is a knife knife yeah yeah let's
00:02:26
see no don't want to well this is a nice table yeah go Rudy and you know what but you know what can I tell you something
00:02:32
yeah you don't get to keep it I didn't say no you know what you know what B I'm
00:02:37
not going to give that to her she doesn't get that knife you know what Rudy she doesn't get anything from now on here yeah yeah this one you get that
00:02:44
one what is that it's another knife okay get her that one you get a little baby knife baby knife there you go you can
00:02:49
have both I love you here here take both take both you freak yeah psycho but she
00:02:55
says all this stuff and it's like you know I go one day why don't you just say something and she's like and she's
00:03:00
always like I will one day I comont him so you're finally going to confront me
00:03:06
Rudy did you get any AMC stock or GameStop stock no you do you know what I'm talking about yeah yeah did you no
00:03:12
but K how much how many she didn't buy like five grand she want five grand
00:03:18
worth worth yeah no of I don't know what yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah she put in $5,000 but there's weeks ago but stocks
00:03:24
are only worth a couple hundred now right a piece yeah yeah what is it at right now what's GameStop at right now
00:03:32
well this morning was at 3:25 wow yeah I think it's so cool what they're doing I
00:03:38
am but bury them yeah all these hedge fund people have been making so much money and they don't do anything I'm on
00:03:43
their side why what you're on like rich I like Richies I like rich but but you
00:03:49
like don't don't you like rich people that get rich from doing something cool or talented these people didn't do anything Co I know I just feel like they
00:03:55
they they they know these loopholes and little things that they do right to make money cool and and what I what's [ __ ]
00:04:03
up about it is and then you know the common man like us right we find out about it right yeah and then they try to
00:04:10
[ __ ] us they did they did they are [ __ ] us they're stopping every you know George bought a lot what did he buy
00:04:15
he bought you bought GameStop and AMC uh I'm getting AMC this afternoon I bought GameStop there oh are you gonna buy any
00:04:23
I'm thinking about it but then I'm like I I lose I feel like I'm I feel like we're I'm behind this is you know what this looks this like you and me go to
00:04:29
the casin if if you and me went to the casino in Vegas we'd lose 100 Grand well i' I've done it that's what I'm saying I
00:04:34
don't win at those things I don't I'm a loser gambling doesn't work for us no I could get like um like Blackjack right I
00:04:40
could get two two [ __ ] Kings King King King King and still lose Ace King
00:04:46
yeah yeah he wins every time every time every single time yeah no I can't I gambling is for me gambling is um I'll
00:04:52
do it for fun yeah but I'm not I don't think about I'm GNA win money yeah that's G they're full-time gambling
00:04:58
Andreas no for you right yeah I I always have a inside information actually do
00:05:03
you guys want to know how much uh can you guess how much on ground work that
00:05:08
people don't know about that you Andrew and I can buy in this is going to be a new segment called Andre is on the ground yeah yeah Andre on the ground
00:05:14
Finance advice Finance advise already that's Finance ad not convinced I'm not
00:05:20
convinced he's I just saw Matador in my head pull Finance advice Andreas a finance advice do you
00:05:28
need advice but instead of a m like a little [Laughter] Bulldog yeah by the way what an
00:05:34
appropriate metaphor for the bull for Wall Street running past a little a little meme of of Andre the bull of Wall
00:05:40
Street running through a red and him going Andre s Finance
00:05:46
advice what is it what is it what's your advice Bobby would you buy a Chipotle
00:05:51
stock or would you go with something like Mna oh he's saying what's more popular oh if we were gambling right now
00:05:57
okay I see what he or Chipotle M's medical yeah they're pharmaceutical compan m is the one who's
00:06:03
coming out with the vaccine yeah they're making the yeah um I would go with Chipotle I think I'd also go with Chipotle because mad I feel like madna
00:06:09
goes up and down all the time Chipotle is probably on a steady rise yeah how much do you think is worth I would say
00:06:15
Chipotle stock is worth3 or $400 $360 and what about Mna madna is up in
00:06:23
the thousands I bet probably like 12 to 1500 well now that laugh though so
00:06:29
condescending it's so condescending and so gross could you imagine doing that to a client what a piece of [ __ ] I come
00:06:36
into his office and he's like you're here for finance advice yeah plus he has the internet in front of him yeah I know he looking at at the internet going and
00:06:43
me and my husband me and my husband Bobby we walk into your office and and I say you know we've never done this
00:06:48
before and Bob's interested and getting in the market right that's why you guys are here thank you for coming you guys
00:06:55
thank you for having us but we were just curious we're looking to spend a little bit of money and we think maybe in chipot is that how much is chipot we
00:07:01
thinking Chipotle we love the restaurant we go there every Friday after my after
00:07:06
work and what I get is I get a a burrito yeah a bur yeah a little burrito and I
00:07:11
get a burrito bowl cuz I'm watching my cows exactly and I you know for me you know I like the cows Friday night's my uh my uh Cal night that's when he lets
00:07:18
loose yeah so how much is your pole stock $11,200 oh holy
00:07:26
[ __ ] little bit of Rich for our blood how much is madna madna
00:07:32
$173 wow maybe we should buy madna madna yeah yeah but what a $1,200 for Chipotle
00:07:39
yeah you know my girlfriend in high school but her wait her this is crazy my
00:07:44
girlfriend in high school when McDonald's used to own Chipotle her family someone in her family worked at
00:07:50
Chipotle and they had the unlimited card do you ever seen the the platinum card or whatever George pull up the card it's like the unlimited burrito card back
00:07:56
when McDonald's used to own them they they' give you these cards lifetime burrito cards as many as you want for
00:08:02
the rest of your life a lifetime burrito card and we would go and friends could use it unlimited no there was no limit
00:08:09
count that's it yeah a lifetime of burritos yeah I I don't eat there did
00:08:15
you hear the Spain did you hear the Spain he goes wow I know I know do you eat there no no no no I don't eat there
00:08:21
in high school I ate it all the time yeah because how you you eat there don't you eat Chipotle I tried it twice you
00:08:28
don't like it I like it what what's your favorite Mexican food restaurant
00:08:34
restaurant terries oh terries yeah you go to Terry's I mean I like it yeah it's good I love it I go to I go to um this
00:08:41
place called el mitoan oh I love el el mitoan so good and she goes like that she goes whenever she sees me she goes
00:08:47
hey I go hi and she goes do you want the same thing a I love when they do that I
00:08:53
know I love cuz when I we go to teres they all love me they yell from the back
00:08:58
hey B yeah yeah it's the best and they they always give me extra guacamole oh dude I get extra everything you see cuz
00:09:04
they use like little ice cream scooper yeah right so I get two scoops you it's the best yeah isn't that so nice they
00:09:11
don't give her extra they don't nothing cuz you don't deserve it no and you laugh but you don't deserve it yeah you laugh and you don't deserve but you know what also I love is any Mexican place
00:09:18
that has the carrot thing the Pickled carrot oh my God I love those are the best the best everyone should have that
00:09:24
why don't more restaurants do that well because I think they take time to pick they do they that's that's homemade
00:09:29
Mexican that's real Mexican food if you don't have a salsa bar I'm not going at not going yeah I'm not going I love like
00:09:35
the different kinds the you got to have the green salsa you got to have the green one and you have the chunko chunk chunko the chunko salce the G and then
00:09:43
you got to have the brown which is usually a Chipotle is or or a um the bright red bright red is what I like is
00:09:49
what I like yeah yeah yeah I like it's like something out of Satan's [ __ ] you know what I mean yeah and it gets
00:09:54
you moving Papa it really does yeah I like the I like a bar yeah need a I need
00:10:00
a salsa and condiments bar I don't like salad bars though well they're disgusting yeah it's like you know um do
00:10:07
people not know how to use sunflower seeds it's like somebody takes the sunflow and just goes [ __ ] it right you
00:10:12
just scoop it I'm going to put on myself no I'm going to put it everywhere [ __ ] it right and then it's like um listen
00:10:19
all right name it one thing Russian dressing Thousand Island pick pick one
00:10:26
pick because I don't want to [ __ ] get confused here your baby yeah yeah pick one yeah and by the way yeah didn't we
00:10:33
[ __ ] off the Russians years ago okay I don't want to [ __ ]
00:10:38
Russians yeah [ __ ] the Russians man we're calling it thousand island now on because thousand island sounds cool it's
00:10:44
a thousand island but it is they are different they're very different yeah they're very different they have different ingredients what's a difference what's the difference Russian
00:10:50
dressing H uh Thousand Island I think has um uh uh not is it relish that's
00:10:56
it's like something green in it what is the difference one of well don't say that you know and there is a difference and then go into an
00:11:02
explanation where you it tastes different I don't know what it is there is a difference in terms of ingredient no I think the ingredients are almost
00:11:08
the exact same there's one thing that element that's different I'm saying it's like I think it's relish yeah no I think it's like a Mayo or something difference
00:11:14
between Russian dressing and thousand island dressing the main difference of two is the use of pickles that's what it is right that's what I said that's what
00:11:20
I said relish pickles same thing giving it more sweetness and texture that's right I was right so what that was
00:11:26
correct what is it the thousand island has the pickles Thousand Island the main difference is
00:11:31
that thousand island dressing has pickles uh little baby pickle chunks little pickle chunk oh that's right they do have you know what I'm fine with that
00:11:38
[ __ ] Russian dressing get out of here we I I want little pickle chunks yeah did you guys have a a buffet bar when you
00:11:43
were a kid like is what do you mean we used to have a place called HomeTown Buffet I don't even know if they exist anymore yeah we had money we didn't go
00:11:51
there no really we did my my dad would like flick it off
00:11:56
when we would draw by [ __ ] are you right homeown really you guys were that hat it hated it you were fancy like that I mean
00:12:02
when I was in high school we um we had money really yeah so you never went to
00:12:07
something like that we go to Morton's is that like HomeTown Buffet damn you're rich little [ __ ] no we would go to
00:12:15
likees or something you know what I mean really what do you mean you didn't go you guys never went to a shitty Family
00:12:21
Restaurant like a Korean ones maybe right those are cheap and shitty what
00:12:28
yeah I'm saying mom and pop ones those are cheap restaurants you're not those aren't F good it was just like hole in the walls but we would go to that's what
00:12:34
I'm saying it wasn't it wasn't pricey it's not a [ __ ] chain Buffet like Hometown you liked it we didn't go as
00:12:39
like a family but I would go with friends in high school the worst was you know when I used to so when I was a
00:12:45
younger comic when I had to play Vegas yeah you'd have to play something like
00:12:50
Hara don't even the basement you're talking about the basement yeah right so it's like oh my God first of all you have to do if anyone doesn't know you
00:12:58
have to do eight nights of a yeah so you do you stay there from Monday to the following Sunday night
00:13:04
right it's dis and you have to do two or three shows a night yep right and it's like you get and at least for me at the
00:13:11
time it was like for two shows I would get maybe $100 or $50 yeah I think it's
00:13:16
the same now yeah probably the same now right so at the end of the week you're making like 800 bucks or a th000 maybe
00:13:23
maybe maybe right but also you're like they give you the hotel but you're also everything you have to pay for
00:13:29
everything yeah yeah so it's not so when you say they give you 800 900 bucks you're losing $500 yeah cuz there
00:13:35
nothing to do so you're gambling the money away right you're sitting around you're eating you're gambling you're drinking but their their ascentive is
00:13:41
that they go well well the great news is um we're going to give you a little um employee um ID card saddest thing on
00:13:49
planet Earth what is it well you know all the employees at the casino we eat there's a you know a a lounge call it
00:13:56
call it what it is what is a dungeon it's a dungeon D and so you you can smoke there first
00:14:02
of so it's a buffet it's it's the food that they didn't want to eat at the
00:14:08
[ __ ] it really is there's a dumb waiter they P they put put down food and you open up a thing and food comes out
00:14:15
[ __ ] nobody wanted upstairs we must eat what will it be whatever the ones above
00:14:21
don't want nobody so the the buffet in the hotel right up upstairs right like
00:14:26
Midwestern people are like a that looks rotten right I don't want to eat that [Music]
00:14:33
right for the comedians right so now now you have employees going through the L
00:14:38
with cigarettes in right yeah and just drunk right right right and then you're
00:14:45
just you have this little thing ID card right and you're going through and you as a poor comic you have to eat it you
00:14:52
don't have a choice yes you can't afford whatever's upstairs yeah yeah yeah you so you're just sitting there eating like
00:14:57
this [ __ ] you know Brown cucumber right could you think
00:15:04
vegetables seems you know what I mean like a not going to [ __ ] up my stomach there have nutrients in it it's like a
00:15:10
brown it's a brown cuc look like a [ __ ] potato chip you know what I mean right it's crisp it crumbles yeah you me
00:15:18
the Cucumber the the first time I used that card I'll never forget I I went through the line and then I get to the
00:15:24
thing and I go I'd like to um I'm one of the um employ I'm the comedian the woman
00:15:29
at the checkout was like okay yeah like didn't even scan didn't even
00:15:34
care she's like this is not a privileged this is sad take your food
00:15:40
get the [ __ ] out of here yeah it's really sad and then also then sometimes when you're doing a Vegas show like
00:15:46
that you're sharing the green room with another different show that's right yeah
00:15:52
some Lounge ja yeah not not a comedian like a singer will be sitting there like a magician with like you know what I
00:15:58
mean trying to figure out you know how to put the you know you can see the bunny that's in the [ __ ] hat you know
00:16:03
what I mean he's trying to figure out how to get it back in the Hat yeah oh dude speaking of magician did you watch
00:16:08
in and of itself no does anybody know about it Andre George Derek Delgado
00:16:15
shout out to Derek Delgato on Hulu in and of itself Bobby I'm not even kidding it's the greatest thing I think I've
00:16:21
ever seen in my entire life it's a before you get I want to watch it look at it but let me just before you get
00:16:27
T I want two episode of that HBO thing you want me to watch which which which the comedian comedy one comedy some guy
00:16:34
that does a documentary style comedy oh how to with John oh how too terrible
00:16:40
wrong I saw three EP I was with K I go let's watch this tonight because Andrew
00:16:46
said was good it's super subversive it's very fun and we're watching it we're watching it did you get the Scaffolding in New
00:16:52
York City this is I'm this is me watching it yeah
00:16:59
it's really funny remember how you wanted to be remember how you wanted highbrow
00:17:05
humor yeah yeah that's it no have you guys seen howu did you guys watch it yeah how good is it George genuinely
00:17:11
he's so he's so brilliant anyway this is a this is a documentary about um a play
00:17:16
this guy does Off Broadway in New York about 500 plays he's done Brennan Neil told me to watch it and I was like
00:17:22
whatever I'll watch Neil Brennan Neil Brennan no uh hold on here
00:17:29
yeah Neil Brennan Neil Brennan yeah yeah um I [ __ ] love Neil no um anyway and
00:17:37
and I went into this kind of being like H I'm not really in the mood for this whatever and it [ __ ] me up man I I
00:17:44
baled I [ __ ] bald I love crying you're G to cry please watch this tonight you're going to cry I watch it tonight it is it on what it's on Hulu I
00:17:52
have Hulu everybody has Hulu it's called in in in in and of itself it's it's a true play that he wrote yeah and
00:17:59
honestly dude it's about his life and holy [ __ ] it's a one man show yes it will shake your soul like it does it did
00:18:05
things for me that I was like wow you have to sit in it for for a little bit and let him get into the depths of the story but once you get into the story
00:18:11
you're like oh it will [ __ ] shake your innards like when was the last time you saw something that did that yeah I
00:18:17
don't know a thing I watched that was like really gotten me yeah I watched tragedy porn yeah you
00:18:24
well yeah I like rewatching like you know um 911 when it as it happened you
00:18:30
know what I mean that's the real you're just sitting there going not real this is fake no but
00:18:36
have you ever watched as it happens like the plane hitting the towers no so you watch the news on
00:18:42
YouTube you watch the news when they're discovering it for the first time yeah I mean yeah hey Bob welcome to oh what we
00:18:49
got this is just in you know that kind of and I watch it I try to bring myself
00:18:55
you know what I mean to that moment like I'm watching it for the first time where were you when it happened I was sleeping I already told you oh
00:19:01
that's right I S the whole day and then I didn't find out about until the next day it's kind of nice to sleep right through that yeah and then when I went
00:19:06
to the Starbucks the next day I woke you know and I went to the Starbucks and people were like all depressed and stuff
00:19:13
I was like what the [ __ ] I what's going on taking a long time for coffee yeah and then I found out but um I also
00:19:18
watched the Korean fairy boat tragedy no no you don't yeah you really
00:19:24
like that stuff there yeah and you know it's sad I I talk about my my therapist stopped doing it but what your therapist
00:19:29
says stop doing it but why not I guess if it helps you in some way it doesn't help me oh it hurts no it I it feeds in
00:19:35
some sort of like that's the only way I can feel no right well touches something in you yeah but for me to see you know I
00:19:43
mean such devastating things you mean played out in real time for me to feel something with that it's it's [ __ ] up
00:19:50
hares hey buad hey buddy listen I um you know when I go on the road I I like to
00:19:57
shave my pubic region of course you shave your whole body don't you yeah I do and I because I'm a swimmer as well
00:20:02
and I ride bikes a lap swimmer yeah and and it helps my time yeah of course it
00:20:08
shaves off some time exact exactly and um all I use is haries yeah Harry's is
00:20:14
incredible it really is the best for my um they are the best blaves man they deliver a close comfortable shave at a
00:20:19
fair price only $2 per refill that's significant cheaper than the store Insanity my friend it is limited time
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friends how much is that value that's over how much that's over $166 for just for three bucks that's all
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you have to pay you'll get a five blade razor weighted handle foaming shave gel a travel cover and a travel siiz body
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wash it's incredibly it's an incredibly great deal but act fastwall supplies last go to harry.com bad friends to
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redeem your offer meundies I tell you what Andy I wear them all the time you know it's my favorite underwear of all
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time love they're comfortable love I have ones with raccoons on it they're purple I have ones with little pandas on
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it they're red my pizza my pizza with little trees on it and the for my my my my my treasure tools your treasure Trove
00:21:56
gets neatly compacted inside the little packaging of the me it's great it's got a nice little um it's got a ball cup
00:22:03
they do they make ball cups for men so it rests nice and easy very big balls for my body you do yeah and it it fits
00:22:10
perfectly in cuz your wiener rests right between your balls like two snug pillows like two body pillows yeah but the
00:22:15
mundies honestly they're so comfortable and they don't ride up that's one of my favorite things honestly they don't like
00:22:20
skirt up up your leg when you're doing anything because honestly guys guys it's like you know I remember like when I would go on the road I would only i'
00:22:27
tell K go I only only because she packs my [ __ ] of course I just only pack the meundies because that's that's what I
00:22:33
yeah the other underwear is a waste of your time I actually threw away all my underweare they have sizes from XS to
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and free shipping go to meundies.com bad friends that's meundies.com badri you know Kila yesterday was just like can we
00:23:05
talk I just sit and talk yeah and like she's expressing her feelings right and
00:23:10
I just I go into when you're I just when oh
00:23:17
someone's trying to be real what is that is that acid reflux right now cuz I just add two pieces of pizza that Zoe Lister
00:23:22
Jones dropped off at my house what what kind of pizza I don't know it was you know white people Pizza H like thin yeah
00:23:30
and I had to put in do you need do you need medication for that you do that a lot that acid refle like who cares
00:23:36
because I don't want your heart to stop at some point if it stops it stops baby no it can't stop yeah what's up baby it can't stop so sad I know but if it does
00:23:43
it does why did zissa Jones just drop off pizza at your house by the way because I because her her the movie that
00:23:49
I was she did a movie with her husband and it's on Sundance today oh yeah and
00:23:56
so they dropped it off you know what my movie that I was in just got uh an award or I mean we nominated what is it George
00:24:03
show them show him my movie this is my movie there I am really this is mine yeah there I am with my dog oh congratul
00:24:10
lacious I didn't know you were in a movie like this hu what do you mean this is huge it's huge it's Pixar Bud oh wow
00:24:15
I didn't know that it's my voice it's my dog did you produce it no oh no I I was
00:24:21
you know you're lucky didn't you know why why cuz I would like where the [ __ ] is my job you would have been I mean
00:24:27
where was where would would you fit in that it's called out and it's about me yeah it's genu Eric Griffin has a movie
00:24:34
out too he does called Soul you're really good at it he he did
00:24:40
kill it yeah he killed it you're really good at it no this show it's out it's about me and my husband Manuel and can I
00:24:45
oh is it a gay one it is and can I tell you something who plays Manuel Andre can't be good it can't be good
00:24:52
really you want to see a scene you want to hear a scene yeah ready yeah he kicks me out because he finds out that you
00:24:59
know I have been with his brother I've been hanging out we didn't do anything we're just hanging out he doesn't
00:25:05
believe me he thinks I was hooking up with his brother it's not true so this is me when I come back home for the first time to talk to him about
00:25:13
it that's our cat how how can you do this to me I
00:25:19
didn't do anything to you Manuel look my brother Manuel my brother Manuel I
00:25:25
didn't do anything to you and and first of all your brother taco and I were just hanging out not Taco I mean he no no I'm
00:25:34
sorry what I don't think we can I can yeah no what broke my heart I didn't
00:25:40
break anything trust me I didn't do anything with Taco all I did was take him to get ice cream and after that we
00:25:46
took a long walk in the park and that's it after all I did for you supporting your shitty career all these years you
00:25:54
know all I remember sitting in the back of the comedy story hearing those stupid
00:25:59
jokes again and again and for what then well go deeper
00:26:06
to my wall go deeper your now that you are a movie star and
00:26:13
Davey yes and making the big money now you go with my [ __ ] brother I do
00:26:20
stick to the script Manuel Manuel I want to be honest with
00:26:26
you for a seconding I want to be Hest with you Manuel what I have been sleeping with your brother I know and
00:26:33
you know why why it's because you make me sick you're
00:26:39
disgusting you're a Stumpy little man hey Manuel
00:26:45
yeah and I walked away anyway that's part of the film yeah maybe you should have
00:26:52
rewrites the funniest part about that was I said stick to the script there is no script but he was online for a while
00:26:58
wow you know what just happened there in that conversation in that little improv scene with Andre it was like we were
00:27:03
driving on a freeway and we're cruising and you know it's like hey you got to the 11's right there you got to go all
00:27:08
the way to the right and he's like I got it you're like all right you got to get all the way to the right and then finally he gets there and he's
00:27:14
like because here's when you were going into Andrew's comedy and all that stuff perfect and I said go deeper you went
00:27:21
the opposite way you should use that opportunity he's never heard he's never heard someone say go deeper he's never
00:27:27
heard that before oh I see that's a thing no but anyway that's my movie and congrats to Eric Griffin on Soul because
00:27:33
I think that's killing it in the well there is no box office now I guess what there's no box office so it's yeah there
00:27:38
isn't no how do you know congratulate me on Milan congrats congrats on Mulan when does
00:27:46
your episode of Magnum PI come out when can we be looking for it why do you it's like a t there like a
00:27:53
shitty why you like that when can we watch your episode of magn I don't know when it comes out I've never seen I I don't know did you never watch when you
00:27:58
did the first one I've done six or seven of them you have yeah I thought you only
00:28:04
did two no oh wow I've did a bunch and you've never seen one episode and in the end of J February I'm going back good
00:28:12
for another week and a half God for another episode yeah you don't think I could get one you want me to ask I mean
00:28:18
it'd be so fun that'd be great you would be perfect i' absolutely love to do it you know I you know I'll um I'll I'll
00:28:25
tell the one of the producers that I know it'd be fun to go out there and just mess around with you would but but I want but honestly I'm not going to do
00:28:30
it if it's not with you but we what if we were in the same episode but not in the same scenes that doesn't seem fun to
00:28:35
me yeah well they're at the same time I know but I would rather be in it with you so if they could make it one scene we have one scene one scene that's fine
00:28:41
I would do one scene I would make sure it's one scene you would love it because the it's it's almost as if like you're not on a show he's just having fun the
00:28:48
whole time no there's just a bunch of like dudes that kind of look like me like a guy named Zeke with tattoos all
00:28:53
over his face you know what I mean yeah how you doing buddy you know what I mean and then like it just you know Asians
00:29:00
you know camera operator you know I mean they all look like me you know somebody said why don't you guys check in with Jules more and I got to tell you I was I
00:29:07
had a whole thing today about talking to Jules yeah and you know why I didn't because she couldn't confront me she
00:29:13
couldn't confront if you could confront me I would I would be more conversational with you but I think that you have an issue with me and I want you
00:29:18
to get it off your chest right now what's the what's the problem I don't have it's the who has an issue what's
00:29:25
his issue my issue he's lying he's not Li that's disgusting to call my friend a liar you call a li funny that you think
00:29:33
that you have allies in this house right you could do that [ __ ] in our house with
00:29:39
Kila yeah you try to fuse that [ __ ] little thing that you do here no way
00:29:44
baby let's let's hear it all all all everyone in the room here everyone in our house in the bad friend's house that that is a Rudy Ally say I on the count
00:29:51
of three one two three interesting what George what what George George what oh
00:30:00
he sneezed oh you sneezed yeah all right I'm going to try it again there's any allies in this house show yourself now
00:30:06
say I one two three that's what I thought it feels you know that
00:30:12
silence you're on that mountain alone Jules that silence right is I call it
00:30:19
the void right you're alone in empty space with no one around you MH and
00:30:25
you're free fall when me okay okay no don't okay with your eyes all right right now all right here's another thing
00:30:31
I want to call her out on please please maybe she has a video game addiction she does
00:30:37
maybe what's going on Jules yeah what's going on nothing are you play are you
00:30:42
playing too much Kinda Yeah how many hours I can't
00:30:48
say why cuz I was get oh she going to get in trouble yeah
00:30:54
yeah yeah no you're not Jules is a lot like me in many ways yeah but in the
00:30:59
pandemic we escape we have our ways of feeling good the video game is an escape world for you huh what's the video game
00:31:05
that you play valerant valerant what what is it first person
00:31:11
first person shooter it's like it's like war zone but um more cartoony I guess more more like more animated are you
00:31:17
upset with me right now no I feel like yeah there in your face I feel like you're going he's betrayed me again no
00:31:24
he's a betrayer did you have a conversation with Tito Bobby about um the valerant game and not talking to
00:31:30
yeah yeah why do I do that well it's out it's fine it's fine all right you know that's
00:31:36
another thing that I do that's a bad thing what hold hold stuff above people yeah what I do yeah it's so evil it's so
00:31:44
bad I just realized that I do it but I do it because just now after all the times that you've done it yeah yeah yeah
00:31:49
after 49 years of doing it right I um and and I I I real the reason why I did
00:31:55
it is I do go through a thing I was like should I do it or not right then I weigh the consequences of it in my head right
00:32:01
and then I go you know I think the entertainment qual you know the value of the entertainment risk and reward risk
00:32:07
and reward right so I I weigh it right if you were really going to get in trouble about something right I would never say anything right I think I know
00:32:13
a couple of things you know what I mean that would never say out loud right so well like like what like like the boy
00:32:19
thing the boy stuff no I don't know you keep that private I don't know are you okay something stuck in my in my throat
00:32:26
do you want some water no it's fine no it's fine put your hand out I'm give you
00:32:31
a little water it's fine put your hand out just put your hand out I'll give you a little
00:32:39
water there you go drink up kid whoa dude that's crazy you know what
00:32:46
I mean yeah yeah thank you George Ally Ally Ally Ally for sure I could smell
00:32:52
that from here hey um yeah can you open it to Andrew oh my go
00:32:59
useless yeah um there's a couple of things I want to um a movie that I saw
00:33:06
the other night that people like but I hate it and I and it was called the vast of night vast of night let me see what
00:33:13
it looks like George the vast of night what what's the deal with it why did you hate it just the vast of night holding
00:33:21
over my Amazon a Jeff Bezos origin no so it
00:33:29
takes place in the 50s what tell us by yourself I don't know aren't you like some big science girl tell me about
00:33:34
science pause it we don't have to see the rest no I cannot stand it why do we pretend that that was a voice that
00:33:40
people did what I know I what that's what they used to talk like back in there nobody talk like that yeah stick
00:33:45
him up buddy no yeah I've heard my grandfather talk he doesn't sound like that he never sound like that yeah but
00:33:51
your grandfather oh hey see kid Matt nobody talk like that was a TV thing these are people that are that L used to
00:33:57
live in cities and stuff not the hills of eyes wherever you come from come from the city of Chicago my grandfather's born and raised in the city of Chicago
00:34:04
what's a what's wrong with this okay so it's number one it looks kind beautifully shot yeah it looks beautiful
00:34:11
the it's the um the director's a genius and this is his first thing I think I think he's going to work forever sure
00:34:18
sure um the acting is great okay right it's um let me just I I'm going to just
00:34:24
give a spoiler alert you literally are like this is good this is good you're like it's the title that's like the only
00:34:29
thing no no no no that's not what it is what's okay spoiler Al well we should we spoil it just came out I don't care I
00:34:36
don't care I have to do it I don't care I'm gonna do it all right and if you if you don't if you want to watch the movie
00:34:42
then [ __ ] click it off now no don't turn off the episode just
00:34:48
cuz they no oh well keep listening but I'm going to do it anyway just don't watch the movie what is it all right so
00:34:54
can I just do my rundown okay yeah yeah so it's beautifully shot right you can tell that they didn't have a lot of
00:35:00
budget and I I think what he with the amount of money that he had available he milked it right the acting is incredible
00:35:08
okay and I'm just going to tell you what just the short synopsis of what it is right how about do that without giving anything away short just give me the I
00:35:14
have to give it away or because the reason why is because the ending is the one that thing that bothers you yeah
00:35:19
right okay may I yes all right acting amazing okay so basically it's like they
00:35:25
hear like you know he's a DJ yeah I could tell and she's um a phone operator
00:35:30
person right so I guess back in the day you know I mean if you had to call somebody you had to plug it in operator yeah they I'll hook you up right and do
00:35:38
that right so she's hearing like a little like noises alien noises oh
00:35:45
cool right right and he tells her she goes have you heard this before to the DJ D go and then he he puts it out you
00:35:52
know on the say hey y'all listening right now you ever hear this right people start calling we've heard it before whatever whatever right so at the
00:35:59
end of the day they go through this whole thing and at the end of the movie right they go they go in the forest
00:36:04
right these two mhm and they see an a flying saucer cool that's
00:36:13
it what what that's it no aliens bro bro bro
00:36:19
bro I've seen every xfiles episod yeah xile is a great show if you're going to do a [ __ ] movie anything that
00:36:26
pertaining to aliens it's got to be better than X Files episode X Files awesome I love X Files yeah so what do
00:36:31
you mean Oh you mean has to I'm just saying if you're going to do a [ __ ] feature right something you know what I mean right can I see the alien was is
00:36:37
there is there a love story is that probably the a story even a love story they get [ __ ] Zapped into the [ __ ] Al they fly away do they make love at
00:36:43
some point they probably [ __ ] up there but she's a she's 16 oh gross what no this is they high school kid you asked
00:36:49
me I don't know I'm just assuming but is it a kid love story are they like Falling in Love no he's like an adult she's a kid oh so this is a weird I
00:36:56
don't like this at all yeah yeah yeah it's like a grown man is like hey phone plug girl but like Chris Duckman who's
00:37:03
one of my favorite uh YouTube reviewers you I've asked him on
00:37:08
Instagram to do tiger Bell he never responded doesn't want to do it why do they do that honestly because I think
00:37:14
some people don't care some people like I don't want to do
00:37:19
podcasts yeah but the thing is I've asked people and it's like um who's the biggest person you've asked and they and
00:37:24
they didn't and they kind of blew you off oh there's a lot uh step Yun but what's
00:37:30
one that you like you really it hurt your feelings that they blew you Ste y Steph Yun let's call them out right now
00:37:36
de Yun hurt me Ken Jung hurt me yeah but we've known that Ali Wong hurt me yeah right you know I asked those three
00:37:42
what's the trend we're see what's the trend Asians they're Asian Asians yeah not as loyal as we once
00:37:49
thought yeah yeah why did Alli Wong let you know allly doesn't do podcast she doesn't do podcast but she doesn't do
00:37:54
anybody's podcast it'd be weird if she did somebody if she did like she if she did other people's podcast and didn't do
00:38:00
mine I would I would what she's never no I would do I would
00:38:05
it would be War I know she hasn't Conan I would start a war oh she did one with Conan I get that though yeah yeah he's a
00:38:12
gigantic talk show yeah that makes sense yeah yeah yeah but if she did oh 36 Ali Wong podcast
00:38:18
interviews wow no really it says it right there 36 36 of Ali Wong
00:38:25
podcast uh you're not your mom's book club dear girls oh dear girls is at her showu
00:38:31
does she have a podcast now all Wong with Ali what with K Assad what is this
00:38:38
George anyway anyway um she doesn't do she doesn't do our she doesn't do Friends Podcast no no like if she had
00:38:46
done yours and didn't do mine I would have a problem well her and I aren't close like that that wouldn't even exist
00:38:52
I mean like Ally and I are are cool but you guys you know her more than I do mhm I knew her when she wasn't even a
00:38:58
comedian so all she's done is three truly that's the real number that's fine yeah that's fine Conan wait wait don't
00:39:03
tell me and idiot something George pause on something so I can read it idiot with
00:39:09
Chris Hardwick okay she did Hardwick wait wait don't tell me which is massive and Conan yeah that makes sense right do
00:39:15
you know Hardwick I love him I don't know him well but I like him nice guy he's doing the ball drop show again
00:39:21
really you know the balls that dropped from the thing and the money good yeah I saw it come I like him just cuz I
00:39:26
remember like he always been nice to me yeah at a gas station once mhm and I was like three pumps away and he hey man and
00:39:35
he came up to the you know would you have come up to him I saw him before yeah I saw him before he saw me I didn't
00:39:41
anything why do you get nervous like that I always avoid I always see people and I I avoid it hello hello tushi hello
00:39:50
tush Spritz Spritz on your tush you get on the toilet hello tushi is pH been a
00:39:57
lifesaver for me because I used to have a dirty hole dirty hole it used to be deep dirty and [ __ ] Dusty crusty dust
00:40:04
crusty and you know I used to use like you know every time I poo I use a whole
00:40:10
roll a whole roll of toilet paper yeah that's how crazy that is not economical I know it's a dark hole it's a deep dark
00:40:17
hole and then once we got uh the the tush right I put it in right it's so
00:40:23
economical first of all it was what 75 bucks it's it's it's significantly cheaper than any other bedet that you would find I don't use toilet paper
00:40:30
anymore and it cleans the hole so perfectly nice you could eat a fried egg on my butthole what about scrambled no
00:40:37
just fried just fried okay well over easy is how I like it man the future of toileting is here by the way we have one here at the studio we both have one at
00:40:44
home and at first I was adverse I'm not going to lie I was like I don't want this thing who cares I put it on I love
00:40:50
it sometimes I'm not going to lie in the middle of the night when I wake up to pee I just turn it on just for fun I sit down to pee in the middle of the night
00:40:56
because I can't see and I don't want to turn on the lights and I sit down I turn on the tushy it gives me a nice little how you doing in the middle of the night
00:41:02
yep I'm not lying it's actually very nice the 3.0 the hello tushy 3.0 doesn't
00:41:07
just cleanse your butt with a precise stream of fresh water it cleans itself before and after it's used the smart
00:41:13
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00:41:18
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get to the Finish Line hello tushi.com bad friends door Dash I'm telling you
00:42:00
I'm this is the truth all right the door Dash saved my life in Hawaii how you know why no because I was using these
00:42:06
other apps yeah yeah right and they would say um we don't have anyone near
00:42:12
the location right right right door Dash they had it everywhere really yeah so
00:42:17
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00:42:23
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order with door Dash subject to change terms apply there you go like you know I like small talk I
00:43:41
don't like small talk I don't like it's there was also a time where it was like when you have no especially when you run
00:43:47
into people in the industry and you really have nothing going on right I just didn't want to you know what I mean what are you up to oh I just played the
00:43:53
chuckle [ __ ] Factory in Idaho I don't want to [ __ ] say that I do understand when you it's both people going what's been going on you're like what's been
00:43:58
going on yeah because people rattle off like [ __ ] they're doing oh I just sold a show to HBO like that's what they open
00:44:06
with and you're like oh you know well see nothing bothers me more and there's a few people that we both know that do
00:44:11
this when you go hey man what's up and they're like oh man and they just they just vomit out their new resume right
00:44:18
and you're like I just said [ __ ] hi or they do this this is the worst what they do huh where I there's a couple of
00:44:24
guys where I go what's up and they'll go man you're killing it you know don't you ever have a break right and they start
00:44:30
rattling things that you're doing it's like dude we're not yeah this is real life here baby see when people do that
00:44:36
to me like do it to me like do that right now like watch you're that guy now what this is how I react when I go hey dude what's going on hey Andrew oh my
00:44:42
God Davey Dude Killing it and whiskey Ginger Man and bad
00:44:48
friends are it made me so angry can you imagine
00:44:54
if I was yeah yeah let me try try it yeah yeah your way though all right yeah I get
00:45:01
it go ahead D you you say hi to me in this [ __ ]
00:45:07
scenario you start the thing and I don't want to start it though no you say Hi and then I cuz you that was the whole
00:45:13
point all right where are we at though um we are oh we I'm at a gas we're
00:45:18
pumping at a gas station all right but this is I'm going to play it real okay this is the way I would do it all right we play okay play it for real
00:45:27
[Music] [Laughter]
00:45:33
just give me a second all right I'm just playing it real all right I I don't think that you would look at me like that yes I would you would be like it's
00:45:40
not me I'm playing a guy I know but you're playing another guy but I don't think any guy would look at me like I know how I'm playing the guy I know but
00:45:46
don't look at me like that don't test my acting skills I know what the guy is all right all right here we go hold on hold on I need a second I need a second right
00:45:53
so I have the thing in right me too I'm already here I've been already here I'm already here you just you just
00:45:58
started all right okay ready I'm pumping
00:46:08
[ __ ] Bob Bobby I start oh I know [ __ ] you [ __ ] it up already
00:46:14
sorry I start okay [ __ ]
00:46:21
[ __ ] [ __ ] good hey
00:46:27
oh Bob hey man hey Clark hey clarky good to
00:46:33
see you what's up hey dude whoa are you killing it right now yeah bad friends
00:46:39
yeah a Magnum PI yeah is that what you did yeah you copied me that's what I was
00:46:45
just going to do what you did yeah no why did you copy me you said you going to play it for real play it for real oh what I would do
00:46:53
yes oh I didn't know I thought I thought you said to do it the way you did it no you're supposed to do it your
00:46:59
way all right all right well then if we did it my way it would we would never we
00:47:04
would never talk yeah yeah right all right let's do okay right this is the way I would do it
00:47:13
yeah hey hey man clarky oh Bob what's up man I tell you what's up man you are
00:47:18
killing it bad friends Magnum PI I mean you got but solister or Jones you're doing so much stuff right now you're
00:47:24
absolutely exploding right now doing well that's Inc bad friends and
00:47:29
tiger belly is like murdering it's what Zoe died zois or Jones died yeah yeah we
00:47:36
both did you're right here we both that's why
00:47:42
you don't make small talk I I don't do it I does work I it you're not a small talk guy I can't do it I always say hi
00:47:48
yeah even if it's somebody that I know is going to tra me in a conversation I don't want to be in yeah because it's
00:47:53
what it's like you got to you have to do it you have to go you don't have to that that's why avoid you do because they see
00:47:58
you and that's bad no I always avoid but they see you I what I'm sure they see
00:48:04
you yeah I did this one my I was with my cousin Jenny once and she didn't know so I walked in to pay for gas right and I
00:48:11
ran into my buddy right his name was Ben mhm they go my my cousin's in the car she doesn't
00:48:19
know that we know each other so I'm going to go back over there and pick a fight with me right yeah and I go I'm
00:48:25
going to punch you so hard in the stomach right he's a big guy too he's like all right yeah so I um you know I I do the
00:48:32
gas he comes what's up [ __ ] [ __ ] like he goes strong he goes like really too strong right to the point where I
00:48:38
was like what but it was it worked because I got what what' you say yeah you [ __ ] ch ch ch right I go what the
00:48:45
[ __ ] say to my face he goes it comes up to me and I went like that he fell to the ground he started doing convulsions
00:48:52
right I got in the car and my [ __ ] cousin was like wow thought you were so tough yeah you're a real man huh you're
00:48:59
right you're tough tough guy it's the best that is so it's the you never told her never told her until now Jenny pay
00:49:05
attention until now it was fake oh I want to I want to say something remember
00:49:10
that song we played for you yeah that Loi stuff I love that song There's a comic named Whitmer Thomas do you know
00:49:17
Wht the [ __ ] man Wht had put up a song today and I thought this was I know that guy yeah Whitmer yeah Whitmer
00:49:23
Thomas um it start play it from the beginning he this is a song that he originally composed here during this is
00:49:29
this kind of sums up what the pandemic has been for everybody to me it's short and quick it's great and I [ __ ] love it coffee and water the plant text my
00:49:37
dad and pay my rent try to write something even if it's [ __ ] watch a
00:49:43
[ __ ] movie ain't seen yet checking with friends the M clean the kitchen
00:49:49
counter even though it's clean sit in the Sun and try to sweat go through all
00:49:55
phots and shave my head let become a bottomless hole squeeze the Joy from my
00:50:02
soul try to relate try to self motivate but you can't fight the roll no no no
00:50:09
you can't fight the roll all right I love him uhuh I love him pretty good I
00:50:16
think he's so great yeah that's the kind of stuff that sums up the pandemic to me alone in your house on a green screen
00:50:23
yeah guitar keyboard it's it's it's you know life's become a bottomless hole it's
00:50:30
funny we we've been so conditioned to live like this for the last it's been almost now a year it has been no it has
00:50:35
been coming up on a year right imagine a year I haven't done standup in a year
00:50:43
think how good you'll be when you get back bad yeah it be bad yeah but won't that be fun to be bad oh I can't wait
00:50:50
because I'm just I'm going to start a new but um you are yeah I'm going to start new are you going to put anything
00:50:56
down I'm not I'm literally not going to do any old I don't know the old jokes but I'm saying you should put down the
00:51:02
old jokes on a tape or something like put them out no starting a new my stuff is garbage no it's not let me make a
00:51:09
suggestion I'll tell you why look at me and when people say that it's so funny because I did some of my old jokes on a
00:51:16
when I did the Montreal Comedy Festival yeah and it's online some of them no it was a standup show that I did yeah but
00:51:23
not an hour I know but it was still 6 minutes it got three View okay no one gives a [ __ ] can I suggest
00:51:29
something and you can say no what take away the okay what if you
00:51:36
record record all your old jokes that you're going to throw away yeah okay yeah record them all yeah and print them
00:51:43
on records uhuh and print 25 of them uhhuh like a small amount right and sell
00:51:49
them for charity okay that's a good thing is that a good idea can we talk back to the pandemic though makes you
00:51:55
nervous yeah it does don't be nervous yeah you make me nervous don't do that don't don't transition into something
00:52:01
that's not true because you're uncomfortable with what's going on with you make me nervous about what it's different why see that's why what do you
00:52:07
mean no because I feel like you're going to bring up stuff that's going to like be cuz you know my um I'm not going to bring up insec know but I'm just saying
00:52:13
you know I'm being very supportive I'm just saying that you know I know your spots I know I'm not touching the spots
00:52:20
know but you know where the my spots are within my body is right and sometimes I'm an emotional massage therapist yeah
00:52:26
but sometimes you'll say things and it's like around the spot right you're not really in the spot not hit it I know but
00:52:32
you're around it right but the spot gets it pulsates okay okay you know what we can move on to the next thing but I was
00:52:37
just saying I want to talk about the pandemic you [ __ ] I'm sorry thank you you're right
00:52:43
you've been a great guy thank you and I apologize I love you I don't want to get I don't want to get into this but I don't want to talk you know why I don't
00:52:49
want to talk about the Pandy because you want to bring this guy [ __ ] back on what do you mean whitmer's the [ __ ] I I
00:52:55
like it so I want to talk about tell me what are he saying I know I'm just in general you know tell me it's just that
00:53:00
we don't it's just odd that in the last year it just went by and it's like it
00:53:07
that our society and everything I don't know how to do anything anymore in terms
00:53:12
of what just in terms of like I don't know what it's like to meet people or
00:53:18
have conversations with people I don't talk to people but you didn't do that quite much when it wasn't I guess I
00:53:24
didn't you really a super social butterfly when it was yeah but I still knew how to I'll be honest with you like
00:53:31
when Jeff Scott died yeah we talked about it right yeah it just is really sad I know yeah so it's like little
00:53:38
things like that it's like Jeff Scott died and it's like I wish you know that
00:53:44
number one I believe that without the pandemic that he could still be alive
00:53:49
yeah I mean the only thing I heard and I'll say this is that Jeff people know he's the belove was the Beloved piano
00:53:55
player for The Comedy Store for for 25 years MH the only thing that might have contributed to his death and I'm not
00:54:01
spreading rumors but I'm just saying maybe was I had heard that Jeff was friends with a fair amount of people
00:54:07
from the Hoover [ __ ] gang he rolled deep with a gang from the Hoover Crips from South Central Los
00:54:14
Angeles no no I almost believe I know I know I was
00:54:21
thinking think you know what I mean but I sold it well yeah but Jeff was also the whitest guy youve ever yeah the gay
00:54:27
pianist from the comicy store was not rolling with Hoover Crips but can you imagine that would be amazing in a
00:54:32
driveby he's playing the piano in the car yeah yeah what's up fool he's
00:54:38
like yeah he was incredible but my point is so go back very [ __ ] much let's go
00:54:43
back to the um and it's just um you think he would have survived had the pandemic not happened yeah there's other
00:54:48
people like I um you know I think that a lot of young Comics
00:54:54
got [ __ ] too oh my God so many people how about just people got [ __ ] yeah I had I had a kid calling me
00:55:00
you know Dylan the fat gay guy Dylan yeah you didn't have to Tagg that those
00:55:05
you could have just said Dylan the kid who used to work at the comic store he moved he's in Austin right so he called me he's like I don't know what to do or
00:55:11
Austin or where' he move to what to Texas yeah because I don't know what to do because you know I not make any money here and my dream is here but yeah he
00:55:18
went with Tony hinchley yeah but yeah those guys moved down there for the the Rogan train I
00:55:25
know what do you think of that there so many people I know I don't Tim Dylan's moving down there I know you want to go
00:55:30
to Austin yeah look I don't I don't we just got our houses man yeah we just got
00:55:36
our houses I mean at the end of the day it's like we just got our houses yeah it's
00:55:42
like I'm paying mortgage on my house I'm not it's not here's my other thing if if you this is sounds crazy and I'm gonna
00:55:48
say this and I mean this yeah everyone's like you don't need to stay in La you don't need to be in La okay fine I get
00:55:54
it I don't need to be in LA to do what we do kind of you do you do because those guys they say that but they don't
00:55:59
also those guys right guys like Tony and those guys they don't have like dream I
00:56:05
you and I they don't have dreams they don't have dreams no they don't have dreams they don't no no they don't work
00:56:11
in Hollywood H they don't they don't want to like get on a movie or TV or act
00:56:16
right they're not actors and that's why not that I'm an actor but I like doing it and it's a part of my it's a part of
00:56:22
what I do right yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah right so it's like I like the challenge of it right those guys aren't in the
00:56:29
that's what I'm saying they're not in the acting side of Hollywood and they want to be some of them I think a lot of them don't yeah but some of them do I
00:56:34
don't know Tony Tony I don't think he goes out for stuff like that or but he's had said stuff to me like I can't I can't get anything oh I didn't know he
00:56:41
goes out I I just didn't know how much he goes out but I mean like seura he doesn't he acts only if they ask him yeah yeah right so they're moving down
00:56:47
there yeah Tim Dylan does I mean he Tim does whatever the [ __ ] he wants which is why he's genuinely killing it harder
00:56:54
than anybody else in the comedy game I mean it no no one is funnier and puts out more consistent [ __ ] than Tim Dylan
00:57:00
um I mean who else has moved out I mean you know I'm sure Whitney will probably go down there no yeah dude at some point
00:57:06
I think all those people will go down there me and you are going to be the only people in LA but then what happens when the clubs open back then we own la
00:57:14
right you and me Chang we're running this town how great would that be you and me in La yeah I did cross over the
00:57:21
hill today to go to get tested again I'm getting tested seven days a week I know it's insane great
00:57:27
across the hill to go get tested cuz I went over to the studio that we that we our production office is today is one of
00:57:33
the first days that restaurants are allowed to be open again do you know that we're in purple mode or whatever yeah no restaurants have patios open now
00:57:39
because it's raining here in La Denny's a line down the block no people
00:57:45
are people were begging to eat outside at Danny's that's how much people wanted to be outside wow they were just like
00:57:52
please what is do I hear something oh it's it's she's watching something on
00:57:57
her phone yeah she is she was she was I'm not she was I'm not I'm not wait
00:58:03
wait why when you raise your voice yeah she does get Snappy yeah yeah what do you that's sir Andrew Santino surrender
00:58:11
your phone to to Tito right now surrender your phone the rest of the episode is going to be about you surrender your phone right now do
00:58:19
it I want you to talk to her now I want to tell her about her behavior I want to see if I can damn it just pass code yeah
00:58:27
wait is that is that the Grateful Dead case yeah are you a Grateful Dead fan no no no can you name any members of the
00:58:33
Greatful Dead no not one not not not even the main guy that died no I just
00:58:38
four fingers on one hand no I just like the we're GNA we're going to give you a hint yeah cuz you're actually very good
00:58:44
at guessing names yeah yeah remember when you guessed the vice president and the president-elect yeah so um let's see
00:58:50
who let's see who the the the man who was in The Grateful Dead he passed away he was a leader the lead singer mhm his
00:58:57
name was what it starts with a J George George George yes what's his
00:59:04
last name that's pretty good the last the last name is Hispanic or I would say what region in What
00:59:11
Hispanic region Andre what why are you laughing a very common Spanish last name what is it Andre a very common Spanish
00:59:18
last name everywhere in it's very common yeah correct but make it comedy next time yes Jesus Christ
00:59:26
I was setting him up I gave him like a that was funny I gave the guy an alleyoop I was like what what Latin
00:59:33
region could this be from a five minute [ __ ] break and then he goes comedy a bar
00:59:39
Spanish oh my god dude lie next time yeah Chile he's CH it's ch Chilean last
00:59:46
name George what George Trinidad Trin
00:59:53
Trinidad how do you know that it's not correct yes it is yes it is
00:59:59
George Trinadad was singer the great dad that's impressive how did wait how
01:00:06
did bring up a picture of George Trinidad please how did you how did you how did you know that did they text you images where is George Trinidad right
01:00:12
there there he is Trinidad there he is there he is he died he was a lead singer of The Grateful Dead four fingers on one
01:00:18
hand yeah and now show those the picture beneath that picture of the two guys right beneath it right beneath him
01:00:26
no no no yeah there it is that's the other that's the other members the other members of the great dead can you name
01:00:33
well look it says that Peter and George okay it says Peter and George who you know George Trinidad and Peter ble who's
01:00:39
the third member do you know starts with a c c Carlos Carlos Carlos yeah what's his
01:00:47
last name it's very easy easy the last name starts with an X
01:00:53
Carlos X Carlos senen
01:01:01
Carlos Carlos Zen Carlos [Music]
01:01:06
zenas zenas Carlos stias pull up Carlos stias please and there he
01:01:13
is the third member click on it George the third member of the Grateful Dead Carlos entius y there he is and he what
01:01:21
instrument did Carlos play he played the triangle and the Bongos and let me say something about him right triangle in
01:01:27
the Bongos right there he is Carlos antias Carlos antillas was triangle and the bong but he invented right he
01:01:33
invented the plastic triangle did he really yeah because usually triangles were played with metal right always
01:01:38
right met metallic right but his was made out of plastic it was much bigger and it was yellow purple and a
01:01:44
fluorescent green the right and he used to the the the stick was like colorful I don't know what it was yeah it was it
01:01:50
was almost like a you remember like a a barber shop W you know it had like a wrap to it yeah so right and he would
01:01:55
when grateful Dad would play it right like it would like be
01:02:02
rhythmic right right and they would go right and then he would go drop [Music]
01:02:09
it they were so good they were very good they he would do that for 45 they would jam in G major for 45 minutes straight
01:02:16
straight I mean have you seen a triangle [ __ ] solo it's it's raw a 20-minute
01:02:21
triangle solo is yeah it [ __ ] up it [ __ ] up the ears [ __ ] up the ears
01:02:27
at some point people come running for dinner um so are are you are you now
01:02:34
going to know enough about Grateful Dead when somebody sees your phone case and goes hey do you know about the Grateful Dead yeah yes and so the the three
01:02:39
members are George Trinidad yes Carlos
01:02:47
cilas and and P Peter maave well it's BL but mve is
01:02:55
correct maave is actually kind of a stage name for him yeah and the genre of
01:03:00
music was is the genre of music um rock rock rock
01:03:11
and blues rock and blues rock and blues yeah Blues a rock either way you can
01:03:17
they're interchangeable either can juggle either um I want to show you something because I learned something
01:03:22
very recently the sperm is the hot new wrinkle treatment do you know that no seriously people are using sperm as new
01:03:28
that this is real people are using sperm as facial treatment really do you put stuff on your face at night sperm who
01:03:36
mine have you really is this sperm yeah sperm it's like a new thing so you put it on your wrinkles women will put
01:03:43
there's there's like certain kinds of sperm that people put on their face overnight but it's not human sperm sure
01:03:48
is but what what's certain kind stuff that they can't you know if you go to sperm bank yeah they can't use all of
01:03:54
your sperm you know that right right so if it's not good sperm it gets in these things and this if it's not good for
01:03:59
birth it's good for this but can I just give like Kila my own com and she can put it on her sure can would then it
01:04:07
will work sure will really yeah Rudy what do you have
01:04:15
um I think I'm gonna tell so this is a so we can improve uh check how uh Rudy's
01:04:22
doing with her improv skills all right yeah cuz she is lacking tremendously so she's going to read a story just uh
01:04:30
from her cards uhhuh now and you guys have three minutes to ask her questions
01:04:35
to determine if it's a real story or a fake story okay very good fun very good
01:04:42
okay so you have to learn how to sell what whatever you're selling okay okay I cheated on an exam
01:04:49
and got an A the person I cheated from got a B+ look at me in the face
01:04:56
h Huh what subject was it what kind of test was it math math she's just called just math
01:05:04
Now isn't there like a is it algebra or something that no we call it math in the Philippines there's no like specific
01:05:11
there's only math one two three four what's what's the name of the person you cheated off of Liz Liz the Filipino girl
01:05:17
Liz yeah what's her last name tan listan Liston pretty good Liston yeah
01:05:25
listan all right so we have to guess now if she's Is that real or she's lying you guys have 3 minutes to ask questions so
01:05:31
you can go deeper yeah but what all right we I see two yeah all right um LZ
01:05:37
tan how many people are in the class 32 yeah but that's a standard Liz tan
01:05:43
what about Liz tan I want to know about Liz tan Lan how tall is Liz tan she's 5'4 H 54 how old is she um 18 is she
01:05:53
ugly no she's really pretty she is are you jealous no she's my friend who's her
01:06:00
boyfriend before at the time it was VJ VJ VJ sing the golfer the 65y old golfer
01:06:07
no VJ who VJ Daniel what does her dad do for that a li what does her dad do her for a living her dad is a businessman
01:06:15
what business he makes cardboards yeah it's true really makes
01:06:24
cardboard what do you mean he just makes card yeah like boxes yeah boxes wow what does what does the mom do she's a
01:06:32
doctor wait wait wait wait wait wait so the mom is a doctor and that's not bringing enough enough cash so he
01:06:38
decides I'm going to make cardboard boxes three minutes is up okay THS up first of all that's a that's a lie you
01:06:43
didn't cheat in it isn't it is that true I lied but the mom and dad was true that was real yeah the mom is a doctor and
01:06:50
the dad makes boxes yeah and Liz is true here's a better game Let's create a
01:06:55
better game all right yeah right how about we we we assign you you're a
01:07:01
professor no see that's how you're scared you're a professor right and
01:07:08
we're going to tell you what you're you're an expert on and we're going to ask you questions about thing and you have to answer the questions make it up
01:07:14
right and be confident about what you're saying all right this is a good bit this is a good bit let's see how good let's
01:07:20
see how good Jules is in improv yeah so you're a history Professor yeah yeah
01:07:25
right and the Industrial Revolution is your yeah
01:07:31
really that's so hard I know she can make it up let's see if she can yeah do
01:07:37
you have enough re okay okay here we go so we're two students after class yeah and we're we have questions about the
01:07:42
homework yeah mean not maybe not the industrial re Revolution what do you want to do she's just a what about she's
01:07:48
just a history teacher yeah yeah hi hi um um Miss cun thanks for ask
01:07:55
having us we just had some questions about a couple of questions yeah about today's lessons and whatnot yeah you
01:08:00
know um so um the Declaration of Independence
01:08:05
just can you who who signed in the Declaration of Independence was signed
01:08:12
by Abraham Lincoln and it was after I don't know TI
01:08:20
Bobby wait all right who's Tito Bobby stop when you're okay all right there is
01:08:27
there is no wrong answer yeah cuz you're making it up that's right right but you have to you can't pause like that you
01:08:33
just the whatever you're saying you believe it is a fact it's a fact okay let's try it again it's a fact okay ask
01:08:39
her another different question all right um um um M Miss [ __ ] [ __ ] oh sorry sorry
01:08:47
my bad sorry my bad I'm done my bad we just get nervous we get so nervous cuz you're so smarter than us so um and I'm
01:08:53
not smart but in in in the um World War II mhm yeah um who who was the countries
01:09:00
involved again all of like I don't remember who was in it the countries that were involved were Japan uh-huh us
01:09:08
our country our country yes yeah Germany yeah yeah um Hawaii Hawaii Hawaii was they
01:09:17
weren a part of our country oh yeah they
01:09:23
were Brazil yeah Brazil Brazil Brazil was okay that's interesting so how did
01:09:28
Brazil get involved in that war yeah um our president who was our
01:09:35
president during the War yeah I don't Franklin Roosevelt Franklin Roosevelt
01:09:40
yeah he went to Brazil yes and asked the president if he could help us bomb
01:09:46
Germany who was the president of Brazil yeah Brazil who was the president of Brazil at the time it
01:09:52
was Jose Gregor Jose Gregory I read about I remember him
01:09:58
I read his bio wait wait Jose Gregory didn't he do something before becoming president of Brazil yeah what was his
01:10:04
first job or his job I think he was a janitor he was he went from janitor to
01:10:10
president yes I I remember that I remember that I remember that yeah yeah
01:10:15
do you have any questions because when somebody wins the lottery in this country you you just pull the hose G Gregory they use that term yeah yeah
01:10:23
wait you have a question for you I do so um
01:10:29
so during the war right so the Japan were with the Germans right yeah yes
01:10:34
what was the uh Japan's fleet called yeah what were they called the Japan's
01:10:39
fleet was called akat Fleet atat what does kkat mean akat
01:10:46
means rogue rogue the Rogue Fleet yes that's interesting that's tight that's
01:10:52
tight right cool we should create a band called that k Fleet yeah I really like that I really like that I have one more
01:10:58
history question for you yeah of course um you know now this is embarrassing I
01:11:04
don't stupid but um at the turn of the century you know yeah Y2K yeah this
01:11:11
recent Century what they said computers were going to stop remember that yeah yeah why computers were G computers were
01:11:20
going to stop because our government put some thing in the
01:11:27
chip that's it so our government let me get theight
01:11:33
whoa you're blowing my mind let me get D straight let me get how
01:11:40
complex how complex our govern and diabolical so our country our we put a
01:11:46
chip uhhuh our government put a chip in the computer in oh in what which
01:11:52
computer yeah what computer did I put in oh all all computer products right so oh
01:11:59
diabolical so our government went to Macintosh well H Packard so our went to
01:12:06
Macintosh hulet Packard Apple Apple's Macintosh right same thing and they
01:12:12
specifically put unannounced to the the companies yeah a government chip yeah
01:12:17
and what was the purpose of this chip to stop and maybe make the
01:12:23
computers a lot oh Singularity okay so then why Why
01:12:29
didn't it work Why didn't it work um this technician that works for
01:12:35
the government what was his name he was his name
01:12:40
was John yeah Arkansas John arkans Arkansas much like
01:12:46
the state yeah yeah and or the country is it a is it a country or a state St State it's a state so John Arkansas he
01:12:53
was the one that put the chips on all the computers yes but he made an error and that's why it didn't work what was
01:13:00
the error what was it he was coding and he put penis he wrote penis in the coding
01:13:08
and it didn't work so are you telling us wow that penis saved us all in the year 2000 yeah yeah wow John Arkansas a chip
01:13:18
from the government yeah wow that's what way what does Y2K stand for oh what does
01:13:24
that stand for yeah then your yeah to
01:13:31
yeah
01:13:38
cute oh Rudy you did great great job give it off for rude for the that was good take your phone back Rudy you get
01:13:44
your phone back and you know the Grateful Dead members now yeah all right let's look in the camera and say it thank you for being a bad
01:13:53
friend woo you hear about a kid right yeah who's great at football right in high school
01:14:00
right yeah he's a quarterback he's a quarterback all right
01:14:07
he's a quarterback right and it's now tryouts right for the college yeah right
01:14:12
I'm a college Scout what college uh WNBA that's the college yes all right all
01:14:17
right and WNBA I'm the [ __ ] University head of the sports division got it okay hear about this n chice
01:14:26
manuso I love Clarice Mano yeah he's a quarterback from high school from Oxnard High School 68 he's 68 225 exactly pure
01:14:34
muscle yeah pure muscle right yeah and um I he he gets every time he throws a
01:14:39
ball it goes right into the tight end right in the chest or the wide receiver or the end I mean a wide receiver no it
01:14:47
goes to the what what do you do it when you score in the tou In The End Zone End Zone End Zone it goes End Zone well the tight end could catch it and put it in
01:14:53
the sometimes he does you think think the end was called the tight end yes yeah okay so every time it goes
01:14:59
right in the tight end in the end and so I I hear about this matusa guy right and and and I'm seeing him scrimmage right
01:15:07
with the boys right Hut he and he throws the ball right in back of him yeah yeah
01:15:14
yeah I'm like I heard this guy was good you know what I mean and I know that he has another he's on a team with my other
01:15:20
friend my a guy I know Andrew yeah right so let's do it again go go reset right
01:15:26
on the go on the 20 yard line Second snap right right he spins on his head
01:15:32
right yeah like spins it right and just kind of walks around in a circle like
01:15:38
like right right and then cut I don't know what they say you know what I mean no they don't they don't see cut right
01:15:44
can't cut I don't know what they say cut so then I go then I I'm like a little hey man come on man this is real man
01:15:51
this is for the college W right right he's like I'm doing it I'm trying yeah
01:15:57
at that point I want to be like it was all hype ah but it's not so my tape right the tape that I sent this morning
01:16:05
right is that timeout yeah yeah Rudy how was the tape spinning a ball on his head
01:16:10
or was it throwing it in the tight end it was throwing in the tight end
01:16:15
very good yeah yeah
01:16:23
woo woo
01:16:28
yeah woo yeah
