00:00:00
Have you played comedy? Uh, comedy works south. I've never done the South Club. Have you planned downtown? Yeah. Why?
00:00:06
What? Why? Why? Why has he? Why have you? Why have I? Have you? I haven't. Why? I don't know. You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots? A
00:00:18
white dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. Oh, you two are something. We're bad friends. So, Freaky Greeky. Yeah. Ladies
00:00:28
and gentlemen, Freaky Creek Papus is here with us. Give it up for Giannis Papus. One eye sock lives in the other
00:00:35
eye sock and they go switcheroos. It is. I'm a I am a oneeyed Greek and I am Giannis Pupass according to your
00:00:42
production. That's right. Now I'm back in kindergarten. Thank you for that. Giannis, who wrote that? That's very
00:00:47
triggering for me. Mone. That was a really good play on words. Yeah. Well, I before we get to Giannis, um I brought
00:00:55
it I brought a couple of gifts back from my trips overseas. So, I was wandering the streets, Bobby Lee. Oh my god. And I
00:01:02
saw a store. I stumbled on a store. Let me guess. What is it? It's an old ancient antique Chinese store. It's in the basement. You got me a Muay. I'm so excited.
00:01:14
You know, you honest. I've always wanted a Mwai from from France. I stumbled across a store that doesn't exist, a store that no longer is in
00:01:26
no rotation. Okay. And I Tower Records. And I walked in and I said, "Someone's got Can we guess? Can we guess?" Yeah. Boston Market. Good guess. Things that
00:01:37
are closing. Uh VHS tape. Joann's. What's that? The fabric store? No, that's still open. I was there this
00:01:42
morning. I've been praying for that to close for so many years. Well, God's not listening to you. I'm all Michael's, guys.
00:01:48
A Bed Bath and Beyond candle. Pretty close. Yeah. Okay. It's a store that someone on this crew loves very, very much. Oh [ __ ] Here we go.
00:02:01
Wow. There it is. That is There was one Dual store. Yeah. Still remaining in Europe.
00:02:09
That's insane. I went in there cuz Fancy, our buddy Fancy loves dual clothes. Yeah. And I walked in and I
00:02:15
said, I said, "My face huh?" That's I'll say it how I want to say it, [ __ ] And then I said, "You're going to love this part." I said, "Uh, is it all women's?" And the girl goes,
00:02:28
"Oh, yeah." I go, "No men's clothes." She goes, "We do." And there was a rack in the back with four shirts. Rack in
00:02:34
the back, d a rack in the back. Which is the name of your new life is rack in the back. So I got you a deu shirt. And she
00:02:43
said, "What size is he?" I said, "Well, I should call you because you know the porg size better than anyone." Yeah.
00:02:48
Yeah. Well, I like to watch a lot of Star Wars. Yes. It's triple XL. No, I got you a medium. Are you a medium? Mhm.
00:02:55
So, come get your gift, you stupid loser. Yeah. I got you a Didiguual shirt. In fact, I think you should take
00:03:02
your shirt off now and put this shirt on now. This is your poor body. Here's the best part about it. He's probably
00:03:08
wearing it right now. They make I'm not kidding when I say this. They make maybe
00:03:14
four blue shirts. That's all they make. Take it out of the packaging. Let me see it. It's literally looks like the shirt
00:03:20
you're wearing now. I said to the woman, I bet you he owns this shirt. Do you own it? It looks like it. Yeah. Yeah. They
00:03:26
all look the same. Can I Can I ask you a question? What What What is Lift it up?
00:03:31
There you go. Yeah. What is it about these shirts that you do like? The design. That is an ugly shirt. I know. I
00:03:38
know. I know. We know that. We know that. It's obvious. Yeah. So, so you're welcome. You're welcome. Thank you so
00:03:45
much. And did I get something for Bobby? Well, I've gotten you two wands. Did I get you something? Yeah. At the Renaissance Fair, I picked you out two wands. I know. I hold it dear to my heart. Yeah. There you go. And did I get
00:03:56
you something? I'm sure you did. I did. I know you did. Do you know what I got you? Oh my god. It's It's something
00:04:04
Asianoriented. It has to be. No, it's actually the coolest gift I think I've gotten you. Oh my god. And I hope you
00:04:09
don't have it. It's going to make my heart flutter. Oh, size nine. This is the only bummer. The highest they had left was eight and a half, but I feel like you could squeeze in. I could squeeze in an eight
00:04:21
and a half. All right. Can I open it and show you what it is? Yeah, but now you do. No. Can I say something though? Do you know what it is? Cuz if you have
00:04:26
them, I I I don't have them. But you know what they are? They're shoes. But what are they? Shoes. Are they shoes?
00:04:34
No, they're they're sandals. Okay. They're Ninja Turtle sandals. Okay. But can I be completely honest with you if I
00:04:41
like them or not? Yes. Because I'm, you know, I'm brutal when it comes to that. I know. And honest. But can you tell by
00:04:47
the box what what they are? They're Adidas shoes. Thank you. Okay. But do you know what they are? They're probably
00:04:54
slip like sandals or slides. Yeah. No. Okay. Oh, hello. Do you know what they are? No. Go ahead. Hello.
00:05:09
They are one of a kind custom Arsenal Adidas. Oh my god, how sick are those shoes? Sick shoes. You like them, don't you? I do love them. I knew you would. Yeah. Do they have the They have the the
00:05:20
the Arsenal symbol on the side. On the back. On the back. On the back. Oh my god. That's You know what? That's being
00:05:26
mindful. That's being thoughtful. That's thoughtful. And that's being a friend. That is a friend. Yeah. Yeah. Unlike
00:05:31
you. Unlike you when you came to town and you booked a whiskey ginger and a Bad Friends but not a Tiger Bell. That's
00:05:37
right. So unlike that That's right. This is the opposite of what you do. That's right. It's called a tariff.
00:05:46
Oh, right. I did tariff you 40%. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So, I will lower the tariff. I'm doing only American. Okay. Sure. But
00:05:53
if I lower the tariff, will you do mine eventually? If you lower the tariff, I will tariff war. 10% 10%. Yeah. Yeah.
00:05:59
So, give me a rating on the shoes. You like them? Do they meet your your standards? These meet my standards in
00:06:07
different ways. Okay. Wow. Wow. And I, you know, it's sexual, you know. I mean, so that's number one. Yeah. I'm more attracted to you by by this gift. Thank you. Right. Number two, um I have some
00:06:19
downsides to it to it. Go ahead. Okay. But let's go to the positive. Do you own those shoes already? No, I don't. Awesome. I don't own any Arsenal FC um
00:06:27
shoes. You do now? I have pants. I'm sure it's scarves, etc., etc. And um this is slick. And what's so funny?
00:06:38
It's slick. It's aerodynamic. Mhm. Yeah. Um clean. Clean. Yeah. Very clean. Clean. Um I would be too afraid to wear them. Why? Whoa. Because they're so
00:06:49
nice. Well, they're one of a kind. They're made for running. So that's This guy's taking shots at you. Wow. Thank you so much, my friend. And um
00:07:02
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. No, thank you. Thank you for being here. And thank you. Does the display is that are
00:07:07
you really in awe of them or is that like an excuse that you don't like them? And is that why you're not going to wear them?
00:07:13
I'm just I'm just trying to figure out why you wouldn't wear those. No, you're trying to drum up some [ __ ] I just I'm curious. You're trying to drum up some
00:07:19
[ __ ] And since the [ __ ] is drummed up, may I waddle in it? Go ahead. Yeah. Okay. I think stylishly it's not my
00:07:26
style. Whoa. I knew it. I knew it. You didn't like them. I do like them. What a piece of [ __ ] No, no, no. I do like him. I used a passport to get those. Well, here's the thing. You
00:07:37
could go to arsenal.com and buy the same shoes and get delivered in three days. He was with his family and he thought
00:07:42
about and you probably get a nine as well. He got the wrong size. Those are very nice. There they are. Can I see the other styles, please? They're in blue. Wait a second. You only spent $79 on
00:07:54
them. 80 bucks. The red ones are cool. Those red ones. Wow. Yeah, they're way more expensive. Yeah, I think $600. Yeah, that's more my thing.
00:08:07
That's more my thing. But um yeah, I don't do $80 on my feet, right? Yeah. Yeah, I get it. You picked up on that,
00:08:14
right? That the whole display thing was a whole I know. Yeah. Yeah, he was [ __ ] trying. No, but I you know, it's the sentiment and the um and the thought
00:08:21
that counts. Thank you. Yeah. And I will get you something similar. Thank you. You're welcome. Thank you. Like a Tiger Woods, you know what I mean? Are you upset by I'd be upset. I'd
00:08:32
be like glove turned off. Do they have gloves? I've That's a [ __ ] dick move. I've lived in this space for quite a
00:08:37
while. I get it. Yeah. Well, I'll tell you why, guy. Um freaky freaky. Um it's because we have an honest relationship.
00:08:44
That's right. You know, and we're not about lies and uh we tell each other how we feel. How we feel and I appreciate
00:08:50
that. Yeah. I'm going to display them accordingly in my closet. underneath all the other shoes that I have. That's right. Yeah. And in 20 years time, I'll dig them back up and
00:09:04
go, "Oh, these are in style now." Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Now, I'll put them on. I'll be 70. 73. I do think
00:09:12
you'll wear them. Yeah. My money's on. You'll wear them. I'll wear them in Ireland when we do the golf
00:09:19
thing. You mean in London? No, when we go to Ireland. We're going to a golf thing afterward. That's right. Yeah. I
00:09:24
wear them to at the Golf thing, but this would make more sense in London. That's true. Yeah. No one's going to go, "Hey,
00:09:31
bloke. Are those Osa shoes?" Wait, who is that? What was that? That's a Greek accent.
00:09:37
Hello, bloke. Oh, that's better. Yeah. Are those Oslo shoes? That's good. Yeah. No one's going to No one's going to go
00:09:43
that say that, right? Yeah. Yeah. You're right. Anyway, um your legs are exposed.
00:09:48
Generally, I don't like it. But today, I really appreciate your legs because they're very unlike the rest of your
00:09:53
body. They're very tan and they're very beautiful and athletic. Yeah, they are athletic. They are really good legs. Yeah. Yeah. He's always had nice tan
00:10:00
legs. I know. That says a lot about a guy. And you're wide like in a muscular fat again. No. How much you weigh now? I'm back to 205. I was down to 193, but I'm back to 205. You look great. Thank
00:10:13
you, man. You always look great. You look the same, dude. It's true what they say. You just don't age. Interesting.
00:10:18
Yeah, you look I lost 30 lbs. But that was Empic. Uh W goi. I thought we're honest in here. So you don't you didn't notice that I lost 30 lbs. Wow. No, I haven't got a chance to see you
00:10:32
stand up cuz you were outside squatting and now Yeah, you have. You look great. Yeah,
00:10:38
you look great. No, let me let me say something to you. Okay, freaky crooy. Let me say something to you. Be real and
00:10:44
be honest. We don't [ __ ] around like this. Let me say something right now, Ricky. Okay, be honest. I'm not going to
00:10:50
get offended. You did not notice that I lost weight. I would take a picture of you, put it in my closet under all the
00:10:55
other pictures of people who were underwhelming, forget about it for 20 years, and then take it out when uh
00:11:02
slightly chubby Asian guys are back in style. Okay. I thought we were in the honest trade. Okay. So, you really
00:11:08
believe that? I believe you look better. Okay. You look better. Okay. Yeah. Wait until I get back from Hawaii. Just you
00:11:14
wait. I'm going to get a tan. What was the phrase he used in Australia all the time? You'll see. You'll see. You'll see. You'll see. Yeah. And you shall
00:11:21
see. I will. And you will reap. How long has it been now since the you'll see I'm going to get jacked thing? November.
00:11:27
November. So, you've got some time still. Exactly. But time is a ticking. I know. But And you know what's got to happen? Whoa. You look like you gave
00:11:35
birth and then it looks like my wife's belly. You know, it's like a little loose skin.
00:11:44
I'm sorry. It was just moving a lot. I didn't expect it to move. But I'm not I'm no I'm no better. I'm no better. So,
00:11:50
here we go. It moves. It moves. Yours moves more. Mine does move more. Yeah, it's a deeper ocean. But mine looks like
00:11:57
I'm consistently fat. Yours looks like you're supposed to be fat. Dude, you're making me sm surgery to like remove that. Yeah.
00:12:09
Tighten. You have you have access skin. It just it looked a little loose. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Like that? Yeah.
00:12:18
It's a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She's got abs. No, you look great. You know I'm joking. You look great. I
00:12:23
don't think you believe that. No, I do believe I do believe it. You look great. Next time you see me, dude, Ronnie Shang, dude, you won't even know the
00:12:29
difference. You're going to get ripped like that. He's ripped. Well, he's in shape. He is in shape. He's in shape,
00:12:35
dude. You'll see. He like, we shall see. That's been the motto of my life. Back in the day, dude, they were like, "You're never going to make it as a comedian." You'll see. Okay. Well, the comedian I could get because you're
00:12:46
funny, but getting ripped. I mean, it's like, [ __ ] you're making me so mad. I went to the Planet Fitness a month ago and you don't know. I went to Planet. I walked in, right? And I go, "Hey." And
00:12:58
they go, "You got to go online and you got to give us your bank records to join." And I'm like, "I have a credit card." Like, we don't do it that way.
00:13:04
So, that's why I didn't join Planet Fitness. That's why. Yeah, I I went in there,
00:13:12
right? I don't know. I just I've seen you now. We've been here 20 minutes and all you've been doing is sucking on an
00:13:17
electronic cigarette. So, it doesn't look like you're making much of an effort. Okay. Yeah. I will see. Duly
00:13:22
noted. Duly noted. Yeah. And touché. Touch. Okay. You're the first guy. I come to
00:13:28
you, dude. Wow. Right. When I get my revenge. I'd like to see it. Who's the second guy? Ooh. Mone. Yeah. He's never
00:13:35
on my side. He was a doubter. Yeah. He's a doubter. Let me see your new cigarette. Show off your new cigarette machine. Oh, I saw I saw the kid's got a
00:13:41
new cigarette machine on his person. Now, this is from Canada. So, I got this. Now you smoke. Now you can smoke
00:13:47
without the smoke. Yes. And you open this little module like like that. And then woo. Right. You stick it. It's It
00:13:54
heats the cigarette. It doesn't, you know, there's no smoke like actual fire. No fire. No fire. Just just uh
00:14:02
heat. Just heat. Heat induction. Let me say something you guys. I had the worst week of my last life last week.
00:14:10
[Applause] Number one, um Monday I wake up, I have a little sore throat. Then that night, Monday night, I fly to
00:14:24
Toronto, Canada. And now I'm fully sick. Oh, thanks for coming. No, that was last week. That was last week. Okay. Okay. I had the
00:14:34
shivers. All right. And then I land I go to wardrobe for this film. A very good film. It's called Karate Ghost. Let me guess. You play the ghost? No.
00:14:47
No, I don't. I play a sensei. Wax one. Yeah. Paint the defense. [Music] Yeah. Yeah. Karate Ghost. Yeah. Is it based on a book? A novel? Yes. Yeah. Yes. Yes. New York Times
00:15:07
bestseller. So that's not it. So you're playing Karate Ghost? No, I'm not. I play a Sensei. Okay. And Jim Belalushi
00:15:13
plays the mayor of a town. Oh, wow. Yeah. And I did it because Jim was in it, right? Cuz we're old not old
00:15:19
friends, but we're friends. Okay. But I black out in my hotel. I had a day off. I didn't leave the I just was in and
00:15:26
then I literally the next couple of days I don't even remember shooting. You were that I was in every, you know, because
00:15:32
they're like, you know, we're going to, we're going to put all your scenes in two days. Mhm. Right. So, you're, you know, five:00 call rap at 9, right? And
00:15:40
you were in every [ __ ] scene. I don't [ __ ] remember it. And then from there, I go to the Comedy Works in
00:15:46
Denver, and they booked me in the wrong club. You You were downtown. You're not down. You're in the South one. Yes. Have
00:15:53
you played Comedy uh Comedy Works South? I've never done the South Club. Have you played downtown? Yeah. Why? What? Why?
00:16:00
It's my favorite one of my favorite clubs. Why? Why has he? Why have you? Why have I have you? I haven't. Why? I
00:16:08
don't know. You know, you're not good. What's that? That's you on the set of Karate Goh. Sick. Yeah. Look how sick I
00:16:15
am. Do I look like [ __ ] Yoda there? What the [ __ ] Don't I look Yoda? And you don't remember any of this? I don't remember any of Is that gym in front of you? Yeah. Right. And I'm like I'm like I'm
00:16:27
going like now. Does he own the dojo? What does he do in this movie? He's the mayor of the town, right? Right. He's
00:16:33
the mayor of Karate Ghost Town, dude. At least you're getting work. Not only that, who plays the ghost? Some kid. What the [ __ ] dude? So, you got sick. And then I'm in this, which is a
00:16:46
great club, Comedy Work South, too. It's just not the same. Never done it. Yeah. And then um my feature
00:16:53
Ramsay Bawi. Badawi. Yeah. He rips so hard. I've never seen him rip, right? And I'm deathly ill, right? And I'm
00:17:04
watching him in the green room rip. Literally, for the first time, I'm going, "How am I going to do this?" Like
00:17:10
there was the first time where I was mad. Yeah. You mean that this guy's good. You wanted him to be bad. I wanted
00:17:16
him to, you know what I mean? Like sometimes I'll go, "No crowd work." You know, I mean, you try to chain them.
00:17:22
Yeah. Right. No crowd work. Take it easy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If you're bombing, just keep bombing. Yeah. You
00:17:28
know what I mean? Settle settle into the bomb. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Remember, they're not here to see you. Exactly. Exactly. Right. But this weekend is one
00:17:34
of those weekends where I know where people went up to Ramsay and goes, "You're better than the headliner." No.
00:17:39
Yeah. For sure. No. No. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. Dude, you were better than Bobby. What the [ __ ] You know what I mean? And I knew that in my mind. And
00:17:46
then the fourth show, oh my god, I struggled. I was drowning in sweat in no pee. What the [ __ ] are you talking about? Well, you said you were you were sick. I thought you were sick. Yeah. Yeah. No. And I was drowning in sweat.
00:18:00
Oh. Like you know how it just splits open. You're just drenched, right? And then you're losing the room. But how's
00:18:05
the new hour coming along? Not great. Not great at all. I'm trying to do an extension, man. Wait, what do you mean?
00:18:11
I want to do it later, Bobby. Yeah. Yeah. It's been 30 years. I know. You've extended. I I I need another year. You've overextended. I think I need this. Your first special? Yes. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, exactly.
00:18:24
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You just haven't put one out. Yeah. Yeah. No, he's taped 10 of them. He's just never released them.
00:18:30
Yeah. Never released them. Yeah. They're sitting in a vault. Yeah. It's the same hour over and over again. But I did take I did it 10 times. Momentum. But anyway,
00:18:36
and I'm now I'm here and um Wow, what a week. So, it was bad. Yeah. But you know what? It It's um Doesn't sound that bad.
00:18:44
You had a little sniffles. Yeah. Little sniffles and then you had a But you have to understand every moment I'm like,
00:18:49
"How am I going to do this? I can't [ __ ] This is I I don't want to do this. You know what I mean? I stand up
00:18:55
can't barely talk. What? Tell the people in Gaza how bad your week was. Yeah. You had a cold.
00:19:05
You know, Afghanistan and India are still at war. You couldn't remember some of the movie you were booked in.
00:19:14
Awful week. Tough week. Yeah, it was a tough week. Some guy listened to the podcast. He's on his way. He's on his
00:19:19
way to work. A [ __ ] triple. Yeah, some guy's sitting in a [ __ ] truck right now driving for 9 hours, but Bobby
00:19:27
couldn't remember half the scene with Jim Belalushi. Tough, tough, tough week. Tough. God willing. You've gotten
00:19:34
this second wave of success in your life has really started to go to your head. Am I wrong? Am I right? Am I wrong? Am I right? This second wave of success has
00:19:50
gone to your head. No, I haven't. For the first time in my life in our friendship, you didn't return my call four times. That's right. I was sick.
00:19:57
No, you weren't. Yes, I was. No, you weren't. Yeah, I can tell you when you did. I got a new phone, by the way. You
00:20:02
were hanging out. What is that? An Android? No, it's a um iPhone, but I've had I didn't change it for 10 years. Anyway, no, it hasn't. And can I just
00:20:09
say another spiritual thing that happened the other day? Yesterday. Something happened yesterday made me cry. And I'm afraid that I'm going to if
00:20:15
I share it, it's going to come out cheesy. Come on. It it was a it made me feel I just the weight lifted from my
00:20:22
shoulders and I became somebody else. And I'm going to share it and I know that because I've never said this out loud and when I say it, I'm going to get [ __ ] annihilated. No. From all sides.
00:20:35
No. No. No. All right. So, just hear me out if I may. Okay. I need gas in my motor vehicle. My Hyundai. Okay. It's blinking. The gas
00:20:48
light. Yes. Is blinking. Has been blinking. And um go get gas. I go to Shell. Yeah. I pump. I go, you know what? I deserve a little not just a
00:20:59
sugar-free Red Bull, but one of those springtime flavors. You know what I mean? Like passion mango or whatever.
00:21:04
You do. I did do. I did do. You did do. I did do. Good. Okay. So I go in there and there's like an Eastern European girl, maybe 23, 24. She got some tattoos. She looked miserable. Right.
00:21:17
Right. And she barely spoke English. Right. And I go, "Hey, can I get this springtime, you know what I mean?
00:21:22
Sugar-free Red Bull, please." You know what I mean? And she's kind of, you know, frowning. She's Eastern European.
00:21:28
Yeah. Yeah. That's how they look. That's fair. That's how they look. And then she looks up at me and she does a little smirk and she goes, "What do you do for
00:21:37
a living?" And I go, I just podcast and stuff. She goes, I don't know what that is. Is that uh radio or? No, it's just online. And then she go, the smirk goes
00:21:48
away and she just starts ringing me up. And about 10 seconds later, I go, why do you ask? And she says,
00:21:56
"You look free." And a tear went down my [ __ ] face. But this Red Bull is not. So 1342
00:22:10
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00:24:54
You look free. Yeah. And what why do you think that is? Well, I looked a little disheveled, but I was kind of singing
00:25:00
coming in. You I mean you made it to the shell, right? Got the gas and I'm ready to go and I go in there. You mean I'm looking at the, you know, bobbing my head. You know how
00:25:13
I do. Yeah. Yeah. You know, and I, you know, kind of do this to the in the front, right? Hand of the thing, right?
00:25:19
But I also look like, you know, tattered shirt, you know what I mean? kind of like free. Free. Yeah. Very free. My
00:25:26
hair was in sham shambles, right? And I had like, you know, a happy disposition about myself. I know. I want to be you when I grow up. Yeah. Yeah. And um it just it reminded
00:25:39
me of like, you know, Yeah. I mean, we are so lucky. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Come on. Let's go. No. No. It's a
00:25:46
moment. No. Bring out your guns. Come on, everybody. Come on. You didn't. I'm against the wall. I'm against the wall. Go ahead. You didn't notice the chains.
00:25:55
He was trying to give you a hint to help her. She's going, "You look free. Wink wink. Get me out. Get me out of here.
00:26:02
There's a guy right behind her with a gun." Oh, but you're so self-absorbed. You didn't expect to get in. What? You
00:26:08
didn't notice that she was a cry for help. You were just like, "Thank you. Thank you. I am free. I am free." But really, she was [ __ ] winking like
00:26:14
this, but you just couldn't tell cuz you were so wrapped up in your own [ __ ] She was being trafficked. Yeah. She's a trafficked Eastern European girl. Human
00:26:20
trafficking is a serious issue in Eastern Europe with varying levels of prevalence here in the United States. Yeah, you could have saved. Oh, yeah.
00:26:25
They captured it and they went, "Oh, you're going to work at the Shell?" That's what they do. No, they don't. Not at the Shell. That's what Oh, no. That's
00:26:31
right. It's it's at Exxon. It's the other one. Yeah. I'm telling you, dude. You're You are free and you always have
00:26:37
been. You don't have the burdens of responsibility. And I'm grateful for what I have. And the comment you made earlier is wrong. What was the comment?
00:26:43
That this next level of success that I have, I'm Come on. It's gone to your head. It hasn't gone to my head, dude.
00:26:49
You were talking before I I thought I was listening to Mariah Carey with Okay, Miss Carrie, we'll bring you a Kai Tai
00:26:56
latte or whatever. I mean, you were complaining about first world problems. That's what he does. Okay, so let's ship
00:27:02
because you're our guest. Yeah. And the last 10 minutes is about about my [ __ ] and my weak and all whatnot.
00:27:08
And I'm sorry for sharing that information. No, it's a personal it's a personal human experience that I had that I must have I should have kept to
00:27:14
myself. No, I'm glad you shared it. All right. So, you know, what you up to, Giannis? the exciting stuff that's going
00:27:19
on with your life. I got a special out that's on YouTube right now. Thank you very much. It's called
00:27:25
Property Owner. History Hyenas is back together. That's big. Yeah. Uh me and my wife are still
00:27:31
together. That's great. Nobody cares. Yeah, that part. Nobody cares. EMDR. EMDR because of the trauma. Yeah. My
00:27:39
daughters are good. Life is good. Life is good. He feels free. Yeah. Are you free? I'm free. Yeah. Yeah. How about
00:27:45
you? Do you feel free? No. Call me the chains. Talk about the chains. Go ahead. If I'm a chain, dude, [ __ ] off. No, you're in the link in the chain.
00:28:01
Um, yeah, it's No, it's I don't I'm not free at all. I'm actually the most bridled
00:28:07
I've ever been. What does bridled mean? I learned from you. Um, it's the opposite of unbridled mean. That's right. What does unbridled mean? Unbrled means you're free. Okay. Yeah, you're
00:28:18
chained. Yeah, I am. Yeah. And give me some of the chains. Can you explain? It definitely it's it's it is you. Okay.
00:28:25
Yeah. Cuz I thought it might be the world traveling and golfing with celebrities. No, is that a chain? It's
00:28:31
you. You know, you and you know, Timberlake and all those guys. Is that I I feel like that's a chain. What about you, Aunt Jiannis? That could be a
00:28:37
chain. Yeah. Yeah. That's a tough champagne golf course. You know what I mean? I don't drink champagne. Outrageous success can be tough. Yeah.
00:28:43
Outrageous. I see. Okay. So, that's a chain for sure. What else is a chain? Married to a beautiful woman. Carried a
00:28:49
chain. Carrying the weight of of all the responsibility of all the stuff. Oh, really? Oh, really? Yep. Yeah. All the
00:28:56
responsibilities. Okay. Yeah. What are they? Well, this show. Okay. The animated show. Yeah. The game show.
00:29:03
Yeah. Huh. The tour. Just literally everything that we do here. Right. Right. This
00:29:09
entire operation. The Sony show. Yeah. just this, you know, this literal entire operation during Apocalypse Now in
00:29:16
filming. They were all They're all prepped. Mhm. They're all You were in that? No, I wasn't. I'm giving you
00:29:24
Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah. I played They CG I'm all the Vietnamese. They CGIed me back then.
00:29:31
You know what I mean? They just did it a thousand times. Okay. So, um Yeah. I'm not in it. You sure? Yeah. I'm in
00:29:38
platoon. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So, um, so you know, Apocalypse Now, right? They're prepped, scripts ready, right? They, you know what I mean? Camera, lights, all of it, right? They're in production. Now they're
00:29:50
shooting. And then one day, Brando shows up. He had nothing to do with it, but his presence. Wow. He He thinks he's Brando. Wow.
00:30:02
Wow. He just called himself Brando. You think Brando? You were Brando in the analogy. He's Brando. No, I'm not. I'm
00:30:08
the [ __ ] operator. You think you think Brando He's Brando. You think Brando, he's Dennis Hopper. You think
00:30:14
Brando would ever do Karate Ghost? Ow. You're right. You're right. Is that a Brando movie? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh,
00:30:29
you're right. You're right. Okay. Bobby is very, very funny is what He's very funny. He is. Okay. So, um, you are very
00:30:35
funny. You guys are two. He is the He is by far the funniest person I've ever known. Well, I'll take some of the
00:30:41
slack. What do you need me to do, pal? Buddy, the ship is already gone. But I have a little boat. Let me tell you something. Who's going to drive it?
00:30:54
I've driven boats before, dude. I don't think so. I haven't, but I can figure it
00:30:59
out. Okay. And I have the in the back. What is it called? Right. A canoe. A canoe.
00:31:05
Yeah. a motorized canoe. A gigantic engine. A little canoe. Oh, and I have my bottles of water. I have this. I have
00:31:12
my iPad for Wi-Fi so I can watch Netflix shows and stuff. Got it. Right. And I'm coming. Good. Right. So, I caught up to
00:31:18
the machine. The boat. You got us? Yeah. And I'm there. Okay. What do I do, Andrew? Anything. So, he's like Dennis
00:31:25
Rodman, right? You just He shows up and you That's a better analogy. Yeah. Dennis Rodman. Yeah. And you're Jordan.
00:31:31
Hello. The weight of the bulls. I'm I'm a little bit more Pippen. Who's Rodman? I
00:31:38
mean, I'm I'm Rodman. Who's Michael? Who's Jordan? Yeah. Um, in this scenario, none of us. Okay.
00:31:46
That's why this thing isn't as successful as it should be. Oh, we need We're missing a Jordan. We need Amy Polar. We need a Polar.
00:31:53
We need Amy Polar. Or or or Tina Fey. Tina F. You know, they have a podcast now. I know. And it's killing it.
00:32:00
Successful right off the bat. Right off the bat. As it would be. As it should be. And it should be and they they should be allowed to. Yeah. Why wouldn't
00:32:06
they be allowed to? I'm just saying I'm We live in a free society and they You're saying it doesn't infringe on any
00:32:12
of our comedic space. Yeah, it doesn't. No, it's I thought you meant like cuz they're women. No, no, no, no, no. And
00:32:19
that's right now uncalled for that you would even say something like that. And that right there offends me. He's got
00:32:26
two daughters. He's pro women. He's pro woman. Just saying. I'm pro pro, too. Pro women working. Yeah. Ask me some pro
00:32:32
woman stuff and I I'll I'll tell you if I'm pro woman or not. Okay. Um, do you think women's basketball? Caitlyn Clark.
00:32:40
Love her. Okay. Give me reinvented the a WNBA. Okay. 20 points last game. That's right.
00:32:47
Angel Reese destroyed her. No. Fagrant Flowl. Fant. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. But Caitlyn Clark did the fragrant foul. Exactly. Reese. Yeah. He was going to ask you, do you think they should be
00:32:58
paid the same as the men? Well, I think Caitlyn Clark made a $28 million deal with Nike a year ago. I think that that
00:33:05
helps her. That's a pretty good deal. Yeah. And I think she's going to make more as as time goes on. Yeah. Yeah.
00:33:10
What would be your suggestion as a lover of women and such a feminist to make the league more successful? Yeah. What would
00:33:16
be some great ideas to encourage women change the outfits, right? What would Yes. Right. They got to dress sexier, right? No, that's not what I said. That's [ __ ] crazy. Come on. That
00:33:26
you'd even have jumped to that. More clothes. Well, you want them to all dress diky. Yes, dude. More clothes.
00:33:32
Turtlenecks. I think they should all wear business suits. Yeah. Yeah. Strap their breasts to their chest, right?
00:33:38
Right. Yeah. And just, you know, so you're controlling their body. No, I'm not controlling their I'm just saying so that we don't sexualize the the league.
00:33:45
But we're we're the ones watching. Like women aren't watching. Yeah. You have an imagination, right? Yeah. Use it.
00:33:52
Okay. But I think if they dress Give me another You know what I You know what I always imagine when I'm watching the WNBA? I imagine I'm watching the NBA.
00:34:02
Yes. Yeah. Yeah. That's my imagination. Yeah, that's my imagination, too. Give me another thing about the WNBA. Okay.
00:34:07
Name uh name three teams. Name one team. Yeah. Indiana Fever. Wow. That's Caitlyn Clark's team. That's good. I'm a Caitlyn Clark fan. Name another one. Um
00:34:21
Chicago Sky. Wow. That's right. Too. How about the city that we live in? LA, dude. Yeah. What are they called? Ponds. LA Ponds. That's insane. We have the Lakers. We have the Ponders. He got
00:34:31
three out of three. Yeah. Three out of three. Yeah. Yeah. The LA Ponds. Ponders. P. Oh, they're thinking a lot.
00:34:37
Well, no. But no, like Lakers, but Pers. It's a play on words. I get it. It's a play on words. I can't do play on words. Do you really know what the team is here? No. You read one article about the
00:34:49
WNBA and Angel Reese and Caitlyn Clark and you know those things and that's it. No, because I I know how you consume media and information. I I here's the
00:34:56
thing is is that I I know that the the um rivalry between Angel and Caitlyn is made by the media. Yeah. Made by the media, right? And I and then I went on a back her I followed Caitlyn from high
00:35:08
school to college to where she is now. She was number one pick in the draft, you know what I mean? And all these
00:35:15
little information and I, you know, Okay. Sure. So you No, no, no. Wait, what I'm saying is that a lot of times
00:35:20
when you when you're not interested in something and then something makes you like the reason why I like Arsenal FC is
00:35:26
because um years ago I saw Tyrion Enri playing for France 25 years ago or whatever, right? And I got hooked on Arsenal cuz he was my gateway into the [ __ ] sport, right? All right. So
00:35:37
sometimes I I don't feel bad about that. You shouldn't feel bad about that. But you know everything we know because that
00:35:42
it's big news about her. Yeah. And I want to know more as time goes on because I'm a fan and I want I want I'm interested now. Now, do you know what
00:35:48
high school Angel Reese went to? No, I did not. No. So, you only paid attention to the white I know what you're going to
00:35:53
turn this into. You're going to turn this into a race thing. And I didn't. Yeah. Yeah. That's what they were doing. And I love black people.
00:35:59
Prove it. What's up? Right. Yeah. Just in those two words, you get it. I get it. What is that? That's Angel Reese's new McDonald's
00:36:11
sponsorship. What's the meal? Don't. Yeah. Tell me. Don't. Yeah. Yeah. Turn that off. Take the screen off. And we're gonna guess what the a McDonald's meal is. What do you think? How about How about this? We all pick one. Okay. Go
00:36:23
ahead. I'll ask you first. Um I would say it's a fried a spicy fried chicken. Oh my god. What? It's a sandwich. Spicy fried chicken.
00:36:38
Yeah. Um pork rinds. Right. All right. On it. Yeah. And um Okay, that's it. Cuz now it's your turn. The meal. No, because we have to all participate. Oh, but I'm going to finish. And a a grape
00:36:50
drink. What? It's a drink. Yeah. Yeah. Go ahead. It's a drink. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's just a burger and fries. Yeah. Yeah. Me, too. That's how I burger and
00:37:01
fries. What would be the point? What would be the point of that? I mean, it's got to be special. I I didn't see your regular American citizen. Just an
00:37:07
American citizen. Yeah. But I'm It's got to have some flare to it. It's interesting that it's spicy. Spicy fried
00:37:12
spicy fried chicken. That's interesting. Yeah. What is the What is the meal? Yeah. No, the meal is a a fried chicken
00:37:18
sandwich and then it comes with hot sauce in a purse. I got to be honest with you
00:37:25
and a grape drink. Yeah, it does. It is a barbecue bacon uh burger, but it does come with an orange high sea. Oh, wow.
00:37:33
You were close. I was [ __ ] close. Is there fried okra? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You got to have them fried okra. McDonald's Angel Reese special. Get a side of grits with your
00:37:47
order today. Well, they they did. Oh, that was you. Who just said that? It's so good. [ __ ] I thought that was the
00:37:52
[ __ ] I know, right? Do it again. I was teasing you. I can do it, too. Go. You go. Holy [ __ ] What's Caitlyn Clark's
00:37:58
meal? It's got to be Chick-fil-A. It's got to be a Chick-fil-A. It's closed on Sundays. Lean beef, right? Yeah, it's
00:38:05
lean. It's like 64 vegan cheese. Right. Right. Right. Right. Um the bread is um sourdough. Nut sardo. It doesn't have the wheat thing in it. Dave's bread. Gluten free. Gluten free. Gluten- free
00:38:17
bread. Yeah. Sorry, mine laps. That's okay. Okay. Um, there's no fries. Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah. Brussels sprouts. Yes. Brussel Brussels sprouts and a
00:38:29
sugar-free lemonade, baby. Right. Yeah. What do you think? I'm just not in on this [ __ ] Brussels sprouts, by the
00:38:36
way. I'm all in on Brussels sprout. I'm all in. And that's where our common ground is, my friend. Right there. Dog
00:38:42
[ __ ] Go to Katana next to the comedy store. The the Japanese joint. Yes. And they have this fried Brussels sprout chips. You I Dude, you could fry You
00:38:54
could fry your toes. I would eat them. Fried doesn't count. Give me Brussels sprouts. They try to
00:39:00
cook them a million ways. They're not good. They're [ __ ] They're [ __ ] They're having a real glow up. Like cauliflower. I know. And I don't like
00:39:06
it. Yeah. Yeah. Like cauliflower. I'm all for it. Cauliflower mash. I'm all for it. I'm all for it. All for it. cauliflower mash they're trying to push
00:39:12
around to people. Get [ __ ] Give me mashed potatoes. How about buffalo cauliflower, though? It's nice. So good.
00:39:17
Yeah, it's really good. It's fine. So, a couple weeks ago, I found out that Andrew
00:39:22
is now black. You can say it. Yeah. Cut to commercial. How do you feel about this new ginger viral trend going on? I feel like it's justice. Uh, it's
00:39:40
what we've known. Yes. Um, I mean, look, Bill Burr is a redhead. His wife is black. My wife is black. Yeah. Uh, okay. Okay. That's That's offensive that
00:39:53
you laugh at that. You know, his wife is black, right? I met his wife. Yeah. Is she light-skinned? Oh my god. That is
00:40:00
That's in She's wearing a Korean mask all the time. Those like facial masks. Yeah. She wears those to get ready.
00:40:06
Yeah. To get ready. Yeah. But all the but we know redheads are black and we've always been black and people know that
00:40:12
and our rhythm is different. Our vibe is different. White people don't view us as whites. Black people see us as other and
00:40:18
they enjoy that. Amen. And so now you now this show is truly biracial. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. Didn't have to dei it. We did it organically. Yeah, we did. There is one white guy in this room
00:40:29
right now. Exactly. Just me. Well, no. Mone. Mone. Yeah. Yeah. Look at him. Well, I mean in this room. Yeah. Oh,
00:40:35
right. Yeah, they're not allowed in this room, right? How do you feel about knowing that I was black? You texted me. You got excited. I started calling
00:40:42
around other comics to maybe start a new podcast. Yeah. I was like, I can't The irony of me being black yet I'm the I'm the one who's on time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. On this
00:40:54
show. Yeah. Interesting. Interesting. Um but no, when I found out that you were black, I I I because I love James
00:41:00
Baldwin, right? Yeah. Yeah. and and his and his literatur literary works and his essays
00:41:07
and so you know I went back read some of those essays and then um I also visited
00:41:13
some places you know you did yeah I went to Rosa Parks funeral I mean she was a she was a redhead she was definitely
00:41:20
where where was that at what where was her funeral well they've moved it several times but currently it's in North Carolina got it yeah and um I also
00:41:29
what's so funny that's exactly where it is and then I saw Hamilton. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I saw Hamilton when I found out, dude, I saw Hamilton 20 times in a row. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. And um I still don't
00:41:41
understand it, right? Yeah. Yeah. But I'll have to read up on it. Maybe, you know, get some footnotes or whatever on
00:41:46
Hamilton. Mhm. I'm going to BBQs to celebrate right after. Yeah. I'm going to get a greasy little
00:41:52
barbecue sandwich with that. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. What? No. No. Good. Another thing that I um uh I um I I brought back my
00:42:00
Mr. T my Mr. G merch. You did. I used to collect them. Yeah. They're they're a storage bin. So, yeah. So, I pity the fool. You know, I pity the fool as well. Yeah. So, I've always I've been saying
00:42:11
that a lot lately. I pity the fool. You know what I mean? And because of you, an homage to you. Thank you. Yeah. I also
00:42:18
um say hi to black people in the spa. I never used to. You never used to. Yeah. Yeah. So, I go, "Hello there." You know,
00:42:25
you say hi. My my podcast co-host is also um African-American. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah. How do you feel about it, Jiannis? I feel great. I mean, I I came in and I I read the article and uh I
00:42:37
smelled cocoa butter when I got in here. Yes. I thought it was so beautiful. It all made sense. The fresh smell of cocoa
00:42:43
butter. Oh, in the morning. Cocoa butter is the smell of black friendship. Yeah. So, when I got in apocalyp that should
00:42:49
be the line, you mean? Oh, I love the smell of cocoa butter in the morning. Rocket money. You know how much money I've saved on Rocket Money, my friend? It's an absurd amount of subscriptions.
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Hundreds of thousands of dollars because I have so many subscriptions on my stupid phone. No, I know. And I I don't
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your selling today. Shopify.com/bad friends. And then Lawrence Fishburn is there.
00:45:30
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A movie we called Apocalypse a little bit later. Yeah. So yes. Yeah, but he's so white. I think even if he had a black wife and
00:45:42
they had a baby, I don't think it would darken the baby at all. No, my whiteness would overthrow it. What a beautiful
00:45:49
thing you have. Yeah. Thanks, man. Yeah. I mean, I Yeah, things are I'm super happy about it. There's worse things to
00:45:54
be born than redhead. Yeah. Indian. Yeah. Jesus. Jesus Christ. You didn't even think about it, did you? God. This is what happens. Carlos almost dies and so now he thinks he's now he thinks he's
00:46:07
invincible. He's the Michael Jordan. He is He is the Michael Jordan of this team. Yeah. Same competitive nature.
00:46:13
Bald thing. Yeah. Wow. How are you doing? Carlos was throwing up blood and we had to take him to the hospital. I
00:46:19
didn't feel good on the way here, but I'm better now. I was getting nauseous and get sober. That has nothing to do
00:46:25
with it. Breakf might. It might. What are you What are you up to now? Like drug-wise? The usual cocktail of what? Weed and pills. Yeah. And some drinking.
00:46:38
Bob, be cool. Isn't that a guy that is drinking? That response was weird, right? I'm not I'm not drinking. I'm not going out. Have you been drinking? No, I'm not. Have you had a drink? No, I haven't been going
00:46:51
out on dates or anything. On your father's life? Yeah. On your mother's life. On your mother's life. He's
00:46:56
drinking. No, that pause. You're drinking. Why would you want to kill your mother, dude? That's insane. No,
00:47:03
dude. I'm not drinking this. Just the usual drugs. Yeah, Xanax, of course. Why can't we get off of this stuff? I mean, there's a new article that says America has a Xanax problem, so Oh, and you're
00:47:15
contributing. I'm the victim here. The doctors keep giving it to me. Oh, it's a victim thing. Yeah, they got me hooked. But I'm
00:47:22
happy to be hooked on it. Yeah, but it would be terrible to be born in India. Why do you say that? MJ, what's up, dude? Like, black people always say like, oh,
00:47:36
like, what do black people always say? Like, POV, you're a baby in India. And it's like someone crying or something
00:47:43
that black people always say that. Yeah, I assume all memes are made by black people. Black Twitter is, is that what
00:47:48
you're referring to? Like black IG, Tik Tok, just the hood in general. If I was born in India, I would want to be a
00:47:54
Bollywood kind. Yeah. Light skin. [Laughter] Bollywood is the real Hollywood. At least they're still working. They still actually they're still up in How many movies are Bollywood making a year? They
00:48:10
do like 3,000 a year. It's amazing. God, we should I can't We should get into Bollywood. I want to be into it. Cuz it's either that or you keep doing Karate Ghost.
00:48:21
Come on, dude. Stop bringing up Karate Ghost. It's a very good up a thousand films a year. A thousand?
00:48:27
drank them out. Just karate ghost after karate ghost after karate ghost. [ __ ] the food is great. Food is great. And
00:48:34
actually they're having a real glow up. They're kind of like the cauliflower of people. They're doing great. Well, the food is great here, right? I When you
00:48:40
see it made on the street there, it scares the [ __ ] out. I would go a higher end. But my point is that when I was in
00:48:46
South Africa, um after the shows, we'd go to this one Indian restaurant. It was the greatest food I've ever had in my
00:48:52
life. It was so good. But it's Americanized. Like there's in South Africa. No. Yeah. Yeah, cuz there's no chicken tikka masala there, right?
00:48:58
That's our thing. That's they they made that. Oh, wow. Like you ever notice when you walk into an Indian restaurant, the the waiter just goes to the chef, tikka
00:49:05
masala. He just they just know they know what we like. Yeah. I never get that. No, I get like a curry. They But that's
00:49:12
Yeah. And I get a garlic naan, some of the balsami rice. Oh, I love it. Come on, guy. Come on, guy. I do chicken
00:49:18
tikka every time. Do you really? Yeah. Really? Garlic naan, chicken tikka, sagg. And I'm good. Sag paneer. Yeah,
00:49:24
sag paneer. M. You ever get a mango lassi? Is that the drink? Oh yeah. It's so good. Yogurt and mango. I love Indian
00:49:32
food. Me too, man. Big big fan of You know what I'm not into? Yeah. I'm out on for a long time. No more Chinese food. I thought you Wait, I thought you were black, dude. Chinese blacks love it. We
00:49:44
used to. Yeah. Yeah. We moved on. Why is it that? I I got to tell you, every time I have Chinese food now, I'm just
00:49:51
bummed. Now, have you ever hooked up with an Indian woman? Um, Pakistani, but they smell the same. Jeez. Well, may I ask? Yeah. You know, I
00:50:03
I'm inquisitive. Okay. Yeah. May I ask what the smell is? If you can describe it. Have you ever been in a cab in New
00:50:08
York City? I mean, they have different religions and they hate each other. And it's sad because they smell the same.
00:50:14
Is that your bonding? That's how you're trying to mend the problem? Yeah. It's just like, what are you guys doing?
00:50:19
You're the same. You're the same. Like the same. Yeah. How about you? Have you an Indian woman? Yeah. No.
00:50:26
Asian. But I guess Asian no and India is Asia. So no Indian. You've never hooked up with an Indian girl. I have. Really? Nope.
00:50:40
I wanted to feel like global and open that way. I know. Did just You're almost exclusively whites and Asians or half Asian, half white and Mexicans.
00:50:52
A lot of Mexicans. Really? Oh, yeah. A lot of Mexicans. I love the Mexicans. Remember that girl that said I was too fat? She was Mexican. Remember? I loved her. Yeah.
00:51:02
Yeah. Yeah. But, you know, by by the time I die, I would like to experience a a black woman and an Indian woman. Well, you think you think you could get a black woman to date you? I I've been on
00:51:13
dates with um half ones, half Halle Berry types. Halle B's not half black, isn't she? She's black, right? Full black. Is hat is is she? Her name is
00:51:25
Haly Berry. That's weird. I didn't know that. She's biracial. Halle B. Oh, wow. Yeah. So, yeah. But you've never had a
00:51:31
full a black a full black woman. Both black parents. I've hit on them before. Oh, no. No. You No, actually a month
00:51:37
ago, you know, at the comedy store, I made out with one. Wow. A full black. She's hot though. Supermodel. Yeah. What
00:51:44
is it? Yeah. I mean, she's just stunning. You know what I mean? And what happened to her? And she had these She's from Nigeria. Mhm. And they had these
00:51:53
they had these skinny Nigerian lips. It reminded me of that that Tom Hanks movie. You know that you know that Tom Hanks movie where he's like captain captain. What the captain and those
00:52:03
pirates? Yeah. Had those kind of lips. Oh, like Somalian. Yeah. Somalian captain Phillips. Yeah. Dried. You know
00:52:09
what I mean? Somalian lips. Yeah. Not racing being racist. I'm just saying that. Yeah. I mean she was hot but she
00:52:15
zoom in the mouth. Is that her? Yeah. Yeah. She had that kind of lip. It was a little dry, but you know what I mean?
00:52:21
Very hot. One of my good friends is Somalian. They all kind of look very similar. You got a good friend that's
00:52:27
Somalian? I do. Comic. No, not a comic, but friend from a human. Yeah. Human. A regular adult. Regular guy. They look
00:52:35
very similar. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Why not? Yeah. How about a Korean? Have you hooked up with a Korean? I've I've I've
00:52:41
really been around the world. I've gotten a little bit of everything. Laser beams, Eastern Hemis. All right. Good.
00:52:47
Yeah. Greenland. No. Those Northern Lights. You're going to like it. Scandinavia. Okay. Scandinavia. Swedes.
00:52:53
Swedes. Swedes. Norwegians. Swedes. Yeah. Yeah. I've gotten a little bit of everything. Black, white. Yeah. You've
00:52:58
touched all the bases. Jewish. And now that you with your beautiful white wife, she's a white girl. Yeah. Yeah. You feel
00:53:04
like you've traveled the world and now I'm going to stick back to my people. That's right. That's what happened. Is she Greek? My wife is half Greek, half
00:53:11
Italian. Yeah. Yeah. Only Greek girl I ever dated, by the way. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Only Greek girl. Can I ask about is it
00:53:17
hairy down there with Greeks? You're talking about my wife's vagina. You're asking No, just in general, I assume
00:53:23
it's hairy, but I don't want to, you know what I mean? I can be open to it that it's not. Nobody's hairy anymore.
00:53:30
Nobody's hairy anymore. Okay. Everyone's trimmed down. Is that a rude question? You think about his wife's [ __ ]
00:53:36
little question? Is it in or out? Does it open like a flower? Jesus Christ. Okay, let's move on. Okay, fine. Keep
00:53:42
going. Really? Yeah, it's great. Yeah. Would I feel anything when I enter? Well,
00:53:48
that's really disrespectful. Okay. That's really disrespectful. There's a lot of disrespect going on on your on your end as well. No, that's a lot of
00:53:55
disrespect on your end as well. So, I'm just giving it back. That's a different level of disrespect. Yeah. Yeah. Really?
00:54:00
Yeah. You talking about Are you angry now? I'm [ __ ] pissed. No, you're not. Guess what? I'm never doing Tiger Belly again. Okay, good. So, our numbers can
00:54:07
rise. Oh, it's true. It's a favor what he has me on. No, listen. I love you. I love you, too. Okay. I apologize. It's It's It's rude. It's rude. I Exactly. It
00:54:19
is rude. Yeah. Yeah. I apologize to you. Okay. That's nice. Okay. Thanks. How's How about your mom's [ __ ] It's You
00:54:26
know, it's slanted. Is it cross? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's horizontal. You And we're trying to get a surgery
00:54:31
where it's I'm Bobby B's [ __ ] Come on. Stop it. No, dude. They beat me into my [ __ ] flight pass. I gave him my passport and
00:54:43
the guy said, "This doesn't have your name on it." I said, "What?" Yes, it does. He goes, "It doesn't say Bobby's mom."
00:54:48
That's so funny. It was very funny. That's a very I was like, "Good on that guy." To answer your question, Greek women are hairy. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. It's
00:54:56
a little hairy. It's just a scientific answer. It's a It's a It's just a fact. You guys are more hairless like sphinx
00:55:02
cats. Yeah. We're a little more hairy. Now that you're black, you must have loved Sinners. The show Sinners, the movie. Oh, yeah.
00:55:09
Oh, I didn't see it. I want to see it. Wow. You would love it. Is that Michael B. Jordan? Yeah. I really like Did you see it? No. Yeah. I do think I do think
00:55:17
uh I do think I'm 2025 will mark the end of my uh Hollywood. That's what are you doing? You're done. I I think after 2025 I
00:55:28
think I'm not I am no longer going to try to be in stuff. Yeah. I think this is it. Why? I think I just don't want to do it anymore. I hear you. I think I'm out. I think I'm out, too. You just
00:55:40
named four projects you're working on. Yeah, I know. But Karate Ghost, Gutter Markers, these smaller like J drug jug
00:55:46
jun what was it? Gutter markers. I was in a movie called Guttermuckers with Jim normal named film with Jim Belalushi and
00:55:53
Leslie Jones and Elanor Kagan's in it. Love her. We should all do like a podcast movie. We're doing one right now
00:56:00
about our podcast and like murder and violence. Who dies? I don't know. Why? So, do you think it's just not It's not
00:56:06
It's not It's dead. It's dead. So, Hollywood is dead. Yeah. No, it's alive. Yeah. If you're part of an elite group
00:56:12
that is no is getting all the money. If you're on an Apple show, right? Yeah. I mean, you saw the studio that might have had everybody and their [ __ ] brother in it. Yeah. Except for us. Us. Does it
00:56:24
pay well like it used to or Apple? Apple does. Yeah. If you're one of those guys, if you're a name, it pays well. Would
00:56:30
you choose between doing Bad Friends or the studio? What would you pick? Studio. Bad. What do you mean if you had to
00:56:35
choose two career paths? You could be in the studio. Mhm. Or you can just keep going as a lead. Like if I was Ike's
00:56:41
role. Sure. I would do that instead of Bad Friends. Wow. You mean forever? That's Yes. No, I
00:56:48
do bad. Okay. Thank you. Well, this last This is more meaningful unless just to do a role on a show. Everyone, you heard
00:56:54
it for her first. Apple TV Plus is reportingly losing a billion per year. What do they care? They make phone.
00:56:59
Bobby just bought a new phone. He's helping. Oh, wow. It doesn't matter. That's not even They can lose all the money in the world. That show had
00:57:05
literally every star that's around in it. But losing a billion a year is not a great business model. It doesn't matter.
00:57:10
What does Apple as branding? Yeah, that's just what they would spend on advertising. What is Apple gross a year?
00:57:16
Not even [ __ ] net. What are they gross? Trillions. That's for now until Trump moves.
00:57:22
Apple's annual revenue for last year was $391 billion. Yeah. That's because Chinese slaves make it. But we're going to bring the factories back here and these guys are going to go back to work
00:57:33
and make it. A so they're going to be more expensive and their profit margins are going to be less.
00:57:40
The whole world's Bob. Do you know her? Karate. Karate. This is a selfie. Do I know her? [ __ ] off. Jean. Jean. What's
00:57:51
your favorite movie? Karate. Is this a What is this? A trans quiz. Oh, trans quiz. Oh, and should I take
00:58:06
it? Yes, I'll take the trans quiz. It's totally straight, by the way. All right. And if you feel weird about it, just pretend. Okay, let's play the Let's play
00:58:12
the game. Let's see. Yeah. Yeah. Continue. Is this person born female or trans or trans? Born female. Born
00:58:19
female. Trans. All right. Which one am I putting down? Well, he says born female. Yeah, I said trans. I was good. Good.
00:58:25
Yep. Oh, this is the quiz. Next question. I'm one for one. Oh, zoom in a little bit. Can you zoom in a little bit more? The whole thing, the page. Oh,
00:58:32
here we Woman born female. Transexual. Transexual. That's a woman. Dude, you're wrong twice. Oh, [ __ ] See, that's what I mean. Ban it. I don't even know the difference.
00:58:43
Uh, trans. Woman. Uh, trans. Wow. Woman. Woman. What the [ __ ] We're gay again. Yeah. Yeah. Trans. Trans. Trans. Trans. Trans. Trans. Trans. I
00:58:54
Yeah, I know her. That's a She's famous. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks, Trans. She was the iPhone girl.
00:59:03
Yeah. Trans. Trans. Oh, trans. Trans. Trans. Yeah. Yep. Trans. Trans. Trans. No. Real. That's a woman. That's where they get you. That's where you get you. Trans. Trans.
00:59:19
No. No. Yeah. Ban it. You got to ban it. You got to ban it. You got to ban it. Yeah. We're confused. Yeah. Yeah. I get that. It's I know a lot of people say this, but it is kind
00:59:31
of like a burger and a Beyond Burger. Exactly. Put depending on the condiments you put on it. You just have to put the
00:59:37
right condiments on it. Exactly. It's close. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you so much for backing me up on this. And I
00:59:43
can tell the difference, dude. If something I don't think you could. If I like USDA. Okay. I I like I like it
00:59:49
verified. I'm just saying if something's got tits and a nice ass, that's a that's a C plus. It's getting a 75 on a test.
00:59:55
Yeah, that's true. And the face. And the face is Yeah. If the face is beautiful. Beautiful. Oh, come on, guy. This is all
01:00:01
you guys. Yeah. You know what my our prediction is? Yeah. I think Yiannas, you will get there. You'll get there.
01:00:08
You'll get there. We'll get you there. We'll get you there. Hey, boys. Yeah. You guys want to go to Thailand? I promise I won't. Yeah. Yeah. You guys
01:00:14
want to go to Thailand? I would never do that. No. No. Why? I I think I I I would
01:00:19
like to be a voyer. [Music] [Laughter] You're a window shopper. I'm a window shopper. Yeah. Um cocking. I'm seeing somebody now and she's great. You know
01:00:30
what I mean? So, you know, I like Who are you? Yeah. Yeah. The spell worked from Andria. What do you mean it worked?
01:00:37
A while back. Holy [ __ ] Holy [ __ ] dude. The spell from Andria worked. We paid for a spell to be put on Bobby or Tim to spell to
01:00:48
the world. How did we do? I don't even know how to It worked. We put two spells. We put two love spells out
01:00:53
there. Irresistible Allure and Rival be gone because of uh the movie. Wow. Wow. Wait, so this is a Somebody put a real spell on him. No, you pay this woman Andria to put a spell out to the world
01:01:06
to give you what you want. Holy [ __ ] And it's only 30 bucks. Whatever you want, dude. Yeah, that's
01:01:12
what you name it. Do it. Yeah. What do you want from the discussion about a television deal? You want a television deal? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Television deal. Nah, I
01:01:24
don't want to pay for that. 30 bucks. It's not my We get a percentage though of his deal. You know, he's going to
01:01:30
bail when it gets, you know what I mean? I want What I want is for my two friends, Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino to
01:01:36
have everything that they want in their life to live well, have health, have happiness, have spirituality, peace.
01:01:43
That sounds like a curse, not a curse. It's not a miracle shop. What did you just say, [ __ ] It's not a miracle
01:01:48
shop. Give me back the residual shirt. Yeah, you pig. I got you a shirt. I thought for sure you'd be more
01:01:53
appreciative. You sloppy pig. You didn't even care. Love it. You didn't even care. All right, [ __ ] it. I just I want
01:02:00
St. Laurent sneakers. Okay, get him some YSL shoes. All right, let's What size What size feet are you? I'm 10. Yeah.
01:02:07
Can you put the spell out there? Yeah. These are St. Laurent. How much are they? $750. $750. the low top. Like, so
01:02:13
if we put 30, it's a good investment. I'll get it for 30. Now, when you wear those, do you think people care? I
01:02:19
[ __ ] care. Oh, exactly. You like that? I want to impress my black friend that I got nice sneakers. I like them
01:02:24
shoes. Yeah. I saw them I saw them Air Maxes when you came in. That's right. I said, "My boy Janice got them clean Air
01:02:30
Maxes on." You hurt? Yeah. Do you promote your special? Promote. Well, thanks for having me on to promote the special. Well, we're happy that you came on. You guys got quite an audience and I appreciate that. So then number
01:02:42
two, check out my special. And number two, what? History hyenas. Check that out. Yeah. Love him. Love him. Love both
01:02:49
of you. Check out our podcast. We're back together. It's great. Yeah. Um you think you know he's going to betray you again. I knew that was coming. But you
01:02:56
know he is, right? He's talking to us about it. He told us he's plotting it. Yeah. Yeah. So you got to get mentally
01:03:02
prepared when he sabotages you. Yeah. You know what I mean? Well, that Let's 30 bucks. Tell that chick. That's
01:03:08
actually true. And let me ask you something. Um, how could you forgive him? Yeah. Betrayal. It's a betrayal.
01:03:15
Betrayal. You know why we broke up? Vaccine. Vaccine had us thinking weird. You both
01:03:22
got you. We both took the Fiser. Oh, yeah. Single shot. That did that. Yeah. That [ __ ] Yeah. I'm sorry. That's all Fouchy. Yeah, it's all Fouchy. Oh, Fouchy did. Fouchi's fault. What a guy. Yeah. Well, you know what? They're
01:03:36
making big changes over there. Yeah. Yeah. Why not? So, why not? Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, it's worn off. We're back.
01:03:42
We're good. Okay. People are loving it. It's happy times. Good times. You are you still You're not working for ICE
01:03:48
anymore. You're done. I'm done for ICE for the time being because it's brutal. That was Yeah. When History Hang is ended, I had to I went got a job at ICE.
01:03:56
Yeah. Yeah. Wow. And I couldn't take it anymore. You just couldn't screaming. It's a lot. Yeah. Just the screaming. At
01:04:04
first, I enjoyed it. You still friends with Steven Miller? He's That's a friendship and a bond that can't be. I've known him since we were little kids. Okay. Okay. And we just see eye to eye on everything. All right. You know
01:04:15
what makes me happy? It makes me happy to know that this show is still as stupid as it's always been from the beginning because I see a lot of our podcast pals or people in our sphere
01:04:29
that are taking these shows to a level that we don't go to. Which is what? Well, they're all having like politicians on. Tim got [ __ ] interviewed by like CNN. Yeah. I was
01:04:41
like, "What in the [ __ ] is going on?" Yeah. We stay here. Same with hyenas. We just We stay right here right here.
01:04:47
Yeah. Yeah. And I saw that they had Bernie on on Schultz's show. Yeah. What the [ __ ] is going on? He's not coming
01:04:54
here. Bernie. We had David Mamemoth. Yeah. Ben Affleck. Yeah. But that's rad. We got We
01:05:01
got people that they can't get. Yeah. No, it's not that they can't get him. Well, they can get him, but we got him, too.
01:05:10
I just don't think we want politicians show. No, no, no, no. I think that's a strange word. Keep a judge. I'd have
01:05:16
He's gay. Yeah. No thanks. Ban it. Uh, no. No, no. It's getting a little muddled, right? It's getting a little What's going on? I just think we're I just think podcasting
01:05:28
comedy podcasting is entering this world of like news or something. Yeah. And people are taking it serious and it's not. Well, there was an article after the election about how legacy media
01:05:40
doesn't have the, you know, um power it once had and that podcasting is now, you
01:05:46
know, I mean, replacing some of that, you know. I That's not good. We shouldn't replace it. This should be its
01:05:52
own thing. Yeah. This is its own form of music. Do you know what I mean? Well, you know, like the news on TV was like
01:05:59
the dictatorship, the regime, and then the internet was like uh an American military coup and uh then there was a vacuum and now comedians and like
01:06:10
grifters are like uh warlords or like news warlords. We're warlords. Yeah, we're not warlords. No. What are we? We're like, you guys are like funny
01:06:20
warlords. Yeah, you the dictator would be in control and give it. Now you're like marauding warlords in control of your own fftom. Wow. Bad and Tim's got
01:06:31
his thief. We're all warlords. Yeah. Filling this vacuum, but also I mean from this coup. We also I mean you
01:06:38
probably know more than me probably, but um I don't know much in the world. Yeah.
01:06:43
I only know what I read this morning. Yeah. So me too. So my point is is that we don't know enough to have these
01:06:48
people on. We are goofy. Yeah. It's a comedy podcast. Imagine Bernie Sanders coming. It's great. It's great to be
01:06:54
here. And Bobb's like, "What does your penis look like?" Yeah. Yeah. Well, no, I wouldn't say that. Why you your
01:06:59
[ __ ] mind? Why would I say that? What would you say? I'm Bernie Sand. I go, "What are your political?" I don't know. But my point I wouldn't say that about
01:07:05
your dick. You'd get to penis somehow. Is your [ __ ] gray? Okay, that'd be one of them. Yeah, you're right. Is it
01:07:10
though? It brings big numbers, right? That's probably why people do because everyone's like talking. It didn't used
01:07:15
to be this way. It didn't used to be everyone was into politics. Now even kids are into politics. Yeah. When I was
01:07:20
like 12, I would just be like, "Smell my fingers." Now people are like, "What's your position on Israel Palestine?"
01:07:26
You're like, "You're 12 years old, guy." Yeah. Well, I I know your position. What's my position? I'm not going to say it. Say it. Yeah. Do you standing
01:07:34
strong? I'll tell you. You're standing strong. That's all I know. Standing strong. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And probably on the wrong side of history. Well, what
01:07:40
is my position? I have no idea. You just said it. I don't know. You know, I'm definitely on the right side of history.
01:07:46
Okay. Yeah. You on the right side or wrong? I'm looking at the map. What is the right side? The right side. The right. You mean the right the literal
01:07:52
right side? Well, let me see. The That's interesting. The right be the right side.
01:07:57
That's right. Yeah. Over there. I mean, even I don't think people even know what we are politically. What? Our fans. Our
01:08:04
fans. Really? Yeah. They Well, it's interesting to see the guesses. A lot of people like to guess. Yeah. You guys are
01:08:10
a couple of uh Republican kids. Hardcore Republican kids. Hardcore Republican. All right. Interesting. He's against immigration. Who is? Right. Look,
01:08:21
let me tell you something. I used to work at a coffee shop called the uh Panickin in La Hoya. Yeah. And every
01:08:27
morning, the only friends I had there were the Hispanic old men that were working in the kitchen. Thou dost
01:08:33
protest too much. This is all a cover for all. Um I had a bond with them. Oh yeah. That was what? Yeah. This is what people do when they try to cover for the fact that they want all all of them out.
01:08:46
I'm not done with the story. Okay, go ahead. Right. So, I had this experience with them, you know, me every morning and then I called ICE and they're gone.
01:08:54
I knew it. I knew it. Well, it's so close to the border. It's like they had to go far. Yeah. No, I I I really love
01:09:00
those guys, you know, and um to me, they're just hardworking people that just, you know, um they came from a
01:09:07
place where um they couldn't really afford to feed their families and they came here and they they're doing the
01:09:12
work that normal people don't want to do. And um I have no problem with that. I agree. And we're all normal people. Normal people. Nor Wow. Americans don't
01:09:19
want to do. Wow. But you call them normal people. So they're abnormal people. No, they're not. They're normal
01:09:25
as well. So, but why' you say the they're normal in an abnormal way? Well, I will say we got a couple immigrants here and and and he does a job nobody wants to do. So, that is
01:09:41
true. Anyway, Yiannis, look in the camera and say thank you for being a bad friend. Thank you for being a bad
01:09:47
friend. Woo! Woo! [Music]