Search Captions & Ask AI

Bobby Falls in Love | Ep 307 | Bad Friends

February 09, 2026 / 01:27:09

This episode features discussions about various topics including spring water, shaky diseases, and the differences between animals like honey badgers and wolverines. The hosts, Bobby Lee and Khalyla Kuhn, engage in humorous banter about their preferences for different types of water and the concept of seasonal water. They also touch on the topic of diseases, particularly mentioning Parkinson's and multiple sclerosis, while joking about their experiences.

The conversation shifts to animals, where they debate which would win in a fight between a honey badger and a wolverine, and discuss the unique characteristics of Tasmanian devils. They share amusing anecdotes about their childhood experiences with dogs and the quirks of various animals.

Later, they discuss the pressures of fame and the impact of winning the lottery, with Bobby sharing statistics about lottery winners and their struggles. The episode includes light-hearted commentary on the entertainment industry, touching on various celebrities and their experiences.

Throughout the episode, Bobby and Khalyla maintain a comedic tone, making jokes about their lives, pop culture, and the absurdities of modern society. The episode is filled with laughter and playful exchanges, keeping the conversation engaging.

Listeners can expect a mix of humor, personal stories, and light-hearted debates, showcasing the chemistry between the hosts.

TLDR

Bobby Lee and Khalyla Kuhn discuss water preferences, animal fights, and the pressures of fame with humor and anecdotes.

Episode

1:27:09
00:00:00
You two are bad friends. >> Who are these two idiots? >> A white dude and an Asian dude. You two
00:00:07
are disgusting. >> Well, you two are something. >> We're bad friends.
00:00:12
>> Oh, this is spring water. >> Yeah, >> it's beautiful spring water. What's
00:00:16
What's the difference between regular water and spring water? >> Plastic. That's the difference.
00:00:20
>> Oh, I'm sorry. Is this a season thing? You've never had winter water?
00:00:24
>> You've never had some winter water? >> No. >> Well, it's a winter wonderland now.
00:00:28
>> Fall water. any of the seasons. Spring is the only season I drink. >> Which which season do you like the most
00:00:33
water-wise? >> Summer. >> Summer water. >> What's summer water?
00:00:37
>> Summer water. Having some fun. >> Yeah. >> Summer loving is on the rise. I'm
00:00:43
telling you, dude. You're getting so tuned up for this summer. Your body's
00:00:46
going to be good. Your brain's going to be good. >> I don't know. >> I think you're going to get some summer
00:00:49
love this summer. >> Or I'll get a disease. >> Which one? >> The shaky one.
00:00:55
>> Parkinson's. >> No. No, no, >> that's not the shaky one.
00:01:00
>> No, there's other shaky ones. >> What's the other shaky one?
00:01:02
>> Um, there isn't anymore. >> Parkinson is the only one. >> I feel like that's the main shaky one.
00:01:07
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Shaking tremors. >> Give us pull up shaky diseases.
00:01:12
>> They're right here. >> Multiple sclerosis. Multiple sclerosis.
00:01:15
Man, say that five times. They can't. >> You know what I want to do? I want to
00:01:18
get a shaky disease and then have a time machine go down to the 70s and go do soul train.
00:01:23
>> Yeah, dude. I'll do soul train. I I've always wanted to do the line with a shaky
00:01:29
disease. You know, >> some people will get hit a time machine and they'll get, you know, I mean, I
00:01:41
want to go see, you know what I mean? Meet George Washington. Not me, dude. Shaky Shaky Soul Train.
00:01:46
>> Shaky Soul Train. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> That's you, Bob.
00:01:49
>> No, that's not what I was saying. I I love him. >> Michael J. Fox.
00:01:52
>> I'm a big fan of him. >> He's the man. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. His his uh Instagram
00:01:56
handle is Shaky Soul Train, oddly enough. >> He's the man. He jokes about it all the
00:02:09
time, which is so You have to >> Yeah. >> Other way. >> At some point you got It sucks. It
00:02:14
sucks. It sucks. It sucks. And then you got to joke about it. Do >> you think Christopher Reeves was um
00:02:18
resentment resentful toward horses? >> Oh, he hated them >> after that. I mean, would like if I got
00:02:24
hurt by an animal. >> Turn him into glow. >> If you got hurt by an animal, you're
00:02:30
going to hate it for life. Although that might not be true. I got bit by my buddy's dog. My buddy Adam's dog when I
00:02:35
was a kid. Still love dogs. >> Yeah, >> I deserve the bite. >> I came in the back sliding door stoned
00:02:40
at night trying to sneak in to be quiet to not wake up his mom. Dog bit me. My fault.
00:02:46
>> I know a girl named Jenny. She has a big pitball scar on her face. >> Right. And then I go, "Can you dog sit?"
00:02:53
I asked her and she's like, "No." >> Why, Jenny? >> Yeah, cuz they're little though. My dogs
00:02:58
are little. >> You don't have big scary dogs. >> They'll bite your ankle.
00:03:01
>> Well, that's not true. >> Yeah. Julio. >> Julio is a nightmare.
00:03:04
>> Yeah. Yeah. Bite your neck. >> He will he will kill you. >> Julio has that like
00:03:09
>> Yeah. >> But then you go, "Come, come on. Come on, Julio. Julio." And And then Julio
00:03:12
will calm down. But if Julio senses something's up, >> attack mode. >> Yeah.
00:03:17
>> Attack mode. Do you think Wolverines and Honey Badgers get along? >> They're so similar.
00:03:23
>> Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I wonder who would win in a fight.
00:03:26
>> That's That is such a good question. Who would win a Honeybadger or a Wolverine?
00:03:31
>> Yeah. >> No. Who would win though? You think >> it says they do not get along? They hate
00:03:34
each other. They're highly territorial. >> I would say so. Yeah. >> I think a honey badger. Aren't they
00:03:38
crazy? >> Yeah. >> They didn't create a I mean, the X-Men should have had You know what I mean?
00:03:43
>> Honey Badger. >> Honey Badger. >> Cuz honey doesn't sound threatening.
00:03:46
>> I think that's what it is. Yeah. Problem. Yeah, Wolverine sounds good,
00:03:49
but like Honeybadger. >> Yeah, >> Wolverine would most likely win according to AI overview doing due to
00:03:55
its significantly larger size. >> That's what I thought. >> Yeah.
00:03:58
>> Yeah. Yeah. >> Size and strength. Yeah. Offensive power. >> What about Tasmanian Devil? Is that a
00:04:03
mix? >> Oh, yeah. They got >> They're They're small. >> Oh, yeah.
00:04:05
>> And then they're smaller, >> but they're crazy. >> They're crazy. There's The sound that
00:04:09
they make is insane. >> Have you ever heard it? >> Yes. >> Oh, it's it's it's insane.
00:04:13
>> Insane. And wait, you know why they'll win? Let me see if I can do it.
00:04:19
>> I'm hungry. >> As Mania and Bobby. >> Yeah. Can you do one?
00:04:24
>> Do it again. >> It's that That's >> Do you know the lore of this? The truth?
00:04:36
>> Yeah. >> Why they're called Tasmanian devils? >> What? >> When people first came to that area,
00:04:42
>> they were they in they live in the woods at night. They heard that sound. Yeah.
00:04:47
They thought it was the devil. They thought that was devil's island. That is
00:04:49
very true. Also, these things are crazy blind. They can't see [ __ ] >> But their jaw, look at the jaw strength
00:04:56
of a Tasmanian devil. Look it up. >> They can bite through. I I want to know
00:04:59
how many pounds per square inch or something. It's >> That's my new [ __ ] noise, by the way.
00:05:05
>> Tasmanian devils have an exceptionally powerful bite for their size. They sight
00:05:09
it around 500 to,200 lb per square inch. What's the average human bite? What's a
00:05:14
human bite? Human's bite force is 150 pounds per square inch. >> Wow. >> A Tasmanian devil. Is that good or bad?
00:05:22
>> It's 10 times us. >> It's Yeah. Yeah. >> That's crazy. What is that? The
00:05:26
alligators is 3,700 lb per square inch. >> Wow. >> That's why all those idiots in Florida
00:05:31
are like They love the They love the threat. I'm going to get down there. I'm
00:05:34
going to wrestle that gator. See what happens. >> But I hear hippos are the ones you don't
00:05:38
want to [ __ ] with. >> They're aggressive. >> They're aggressive. They're aggressive.
00:05:41
>> They're gigantic mouths. >> Mhm. You know, and they um they are very
00:05:46
territorial. Not only they protect their babies. If you if you see a hippo baby,
00:05:49
run >> cuz they'll kill you. >> The mother will kill you. >> Yeah. They'll just kill you. What is the
00:05:53
father doing? >> Is he Is he MIA? >> Yeah. He He left. >> Go ahead.
00:05:58
>> No, you go ahead. >> No, you go. >> You go ahead. You go ahead.
00:06:01
>> I don't want it. >> Yeah. I don't want it either bread. >> I'm going to get bread. I'm going to get
00:06:08
bread. I'll be back. It never comes back. >> Never comes back. >> Yeah. Yeah.
00:06:11
>> Well, they can swallow. They They bite. You see them bite through stuff is nuts.
00:06:14
>> Yeah. >> You ever seen them bite through like a watermelon? >> Oh [ __ ] Yeah.
00:06:17
>> They can crack right through it. Fancy. >> Fancy. >> Why'd you say watermelon?
00:06:23
>> Cuz I always see videos of hippos and watermelon. >> Out of all the vegetables, just say
00:06:27
pumpkin. >> I always see videos. No, no, no, no. There's always videos of hippos with
00:06:31
watermelon. You see it. You know it. >> Yeah. And fried chicken. >> I knew it. I was waiting for it, dude. I
00:06:39
was waiting. >> Look at that. Oh, yeah. It is watermelon. Whoa. Whoa. >> That thing. Wow. Have you ever seen him
00:06:47
feed him a carton of Newports? He'll He'll do that. HE'LL >> go right through it.
00:06:57
>> It's crazy. >> So funny. Also, hippos, there's a pink residue that ex um that comes out of
00:07:06
their skin. >> I don't know this. >> Do you know this? >> No.
00:07:08
>> Yeah. There's a pink residue. Uh big there is no joke. That's a true
00:07:15
thing. There is no joke. There's a big residue. >> No way. >> Yes.
00:07:19
>> I'm looking for the joke in my mind. >> There is no joke. >> There is a true fact.
00:07:23
>> Residue. If I Is there not a residue? >> Oh, he's right. Hippos secrete a thick
00:07:28
oily reddish substance called blood sweat. >> Blood sweat. >> Not [ __ ] sweat. Blood sweat.
00:07:36
>> It's sunscreen. SPF. Wow. >> Yeah. Blood, sweat. >> Yeah,
00:07:42
>> that's where it comes from. Blood, sweat, and tears. >> Tears.
00:07:45
>> Yeah. I wonder what it is. >> Wow. They secrete >> a red substance. They do.
00:07:51
>> It protects their sun, the skin from sun and bacteria. >> Yeah. >> I thought about that, too.
00:07:56
>> I don't even know why I know that. >> HOW THE [ __ ] DO I KNOW THAT? THAT'S
00:07:59
AWESOME. >> OUT OF ALL THE THINGS, I just know that. >> Well, I looked at my dog today. We took
00:08:04
a dog on a walk today and I thought, how weird that we're of all the species,
00:08:09
like we're the ones that want to walk upright that figured out walking upright
00:08:12
was the move. Isn't that crazy that we were like, "Fuck this. All fours is
00:08:16
crazy." Yeah, >> I'm up here. I'm getting up. Well, how did we get up?
00:08:21
>> I have no idea. >> Like, something must have taught us to get up.
00:08:25
>> God, >> excuse me. >> God, >> don't bring your Spanish [ __ ] voodoo
00:08:29
to this room. Humans walking upright because it offered key survival advantages. I know, but why did we Why?
00:08:34
Other animals can get upright. They just >> No, I mean banana. >> Go on.
00:08:41
>> No, I'm just saying what I'm saying is >> they're up in the trees.
00:08:45
>> Banana, >> right? Yeah, I get it. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Food is up high.
00:08:49
>> THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING. NO, IT'S DUDE, food's up there. Yeah. Yeah.
00:08:54
>> Yeah. We didn't want ground food. We wanted high food. >> Yeah.
00:08:57
>> Is it right or no? Oh, yeah. You come You come up with one, >> brother. I love it.
00:09:00
>> No. No. No. What do you mean YOU LOVE IT? YOU COME UP WITH ONE, MAN. >> NO, it's cuz we're up to it.
00:09:05
>> Why do you think >> vantage point attack? >> Exactly. >> Bigger.
00:09:08
>> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Me big. >> Yeah. Me big. >> You small.
00:09:12
>> Yeah. You small. What happened to Why? Why did we stop climbing the trees
00:09:15
though? >> It probably hurts. >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? Like if we
00:09:21
evolved. >> Mhm. >> Yeah. I mean, you would think that we'd still Well, Alex Honold does still does
00:09:26
it. >> Hon does it. >> Yeah. Did you see that? >> Yeah. Tell me about it.
00:09:30
>> Pissed me off. Why does it piss you off? >> I just Why is he doing that? Insane.
00:09:35
>> It's crazy. I mean, kudos. The guy's amazing, but you're like, "What is
00:09:38
this?" >> El Capitan is scarier though. >> No, he said this was [ __ ] weird.
00:09:44
>> But I'll tell you why. Cuz I saw it. Did you see it? >> I watched it.
00:09:46
>> Yeah. There are places where he would he could fall where, you know, because once
00:09:50
once he gets to a certain section, >> he's climbing again and he could have
00:09:54
fell down to like the next level. >> I know. >> You know what I mean? Where is El
00:09:57
Capitan? Once you fall, >> you're dead. There's no nothing saving you.
00:10:02
>> This was a great PR stunt for Netflix. I mean, 100%. And by the way, get paid.
00:10:06
Good for him. That that that second of his wife like waving out the window was the weirdest.
00:10:12
>> What do you think of that relationship? >> I mean, it seems weird.
00:10:15
>> I think it seems like it's going up. >> Yeah. >> I don't know. It's strange because she
00:10:20
they talked about it. Is this the same girl from the documentary where where he says he's going to leave her? He's I'm
00:10:26
either going to climb. You either stick around and I'm climbing or you can kick
00:10:28
[ __ ] rocks. Yeah. >> And she was like, "I'll stay." >> Yeah.
00:10:31
>> I mean, she They must genuinely love each other. >> Yeah. Maybe they have two kids now.
00:10:36
>> They do? Yeah. >> Where are they? Up at the top of that building.
00:10:40
>> They're at the one center or whatever in in Shuan. >> I wouldn't be able to watch this if if I
00:10:44
was a kid. Like if your dad was doing that, would you be able to watch? >> No. It's crazy. Oh, that's cute.
00:10:48
>> Yeah. What a >> By the way, this was in China, right? It was at It was in Beijing or where was
00:10:51
it? >> Uh Singapore. >> Oh, Singapore. >> Was it Singapore? >> Singapore.
00:10:54
>> Yeah. >> GREAT AUDIENCE ASIANS THOUGH. OH, EVERY every second >> everything blows their
00:11:02
>> mind on the floors are there with the cameras on >> they were THEY WERE
00:11:09
YEAH. YEAH. YEAH. YEAH. >> This guy it was it was cool to see but like >> you know you knew he was going to do it.
00:11:17
>> Yeah. >> I mean I kind of wanted to see him slip a little bit >> and there's also a delay. You know
00:11:21
there's a delay. There's no way if he fell there's no way they'd show it.
00:11:25
Well, because how quick can you snap a camera away because they're punched in.
00:11:28
These guys are and the guys that were doing the cameras on the ropes. That was crazy, too. Yeah, because they had to
00:11:32
do, you know, >> I'd be a drone. Give me the drone. I'll fly that next to the guy.
00:11:36
>> Like, if my partner wanted to do that, I would just be like, "Yeah, I'm not going
00:11:39
to be there." >> Okay, but okay, let's make it more real. What if your partner's like, "I love
00:11:43
deep sea fishing and I love deep sea diving and I like swimming down with sharks."
00:11:49
>> Kila, >> she did that the whole relationship you're with. >> And guess what?
00:11:53
>> What? >> I'm at home. I'm not watching that. Yeah. I'm just,
00:11:57
>> you know, that's true. Yeah. Yeah. >> But you said good luck. But you'd let
00:11:59
you, you know, you let them do it. You're just not going to go. >> Well, I did it a couple of times with
00:12:03
them, those kind of activity. But that's completely different then, though. I
00:12:06
think >> it's just as life-threatening cuz he's an expert at this. The chances of him
00:12:09
falling are less likely than one of the girls getting bit in the ocean. >> You think so?
00:12:14
>> 100%. I You guys don't agree with that. >> Think about this. Think for a second.
00:12:19
This guy is a is a flawless professional, >> right? M >> he was never going to fall. That's why
00:12:25
they did it. >> Those girls get in the water, they have an element that they can't control. He
00:12:29
controls this all this. >> They have animals that are you're at their whim. Yeah.
00:12:33
>> They could just attack you for no reason. >> Yeah. >> This guy, he was never going to fall.
00:12:37
There was no [ __ ] way. >> But they did change the day cuz it was raining.
00:12:41
>> Uh well, yeah, cuz you'd slip. >> I mean, >> let's let's man up.
00:12:46
>> Go in the rain. Do it when it was raining. [ __ ] >> Yeah. Yeah. >> [ __ ] Call. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I heard
00:12:52
you didn't climb tornado. [ __ ] do it. Let's see. Let's see if you can do it
00:12:55
during tornado. >> Real element, not win. >> Yeah, >> this guy's the man though. He is,
00:13:00
>> you know, he is just in one of the greatest athletes of in human history.
00:13:04
>> Did you see Speaking of great athletes, did you see Shawn White jumping over
00:13:09
Gillis and Okconor in Central Park? >> No. >> Sean during the snow closing in New
00:13:14
York. >> Shawn White literally jumped over Gillis and Okconor. Like look at this. He just
00:13:21
like ollies over them in the It's in Central Park, right? Is that where it was?
00:13:24
>> Yeah. On TMZ. >> How sick is that? >> Wow. >> They're just chilling, drinking Bud
00:13:28
Lights, and And he's ollie hopping over these guys on a snowboard. >> Wow.
00:13:33
>> I'd love to get hit in the head by that snowboard. Yeah. >> Get paid, huh? Get a check from Burton.
00:13:39
>> Wow. Wow. Wow. >> How cool is that? >> Yeah. >> Can we even say it or no?
00:13:44
>> Say what? >> About you doing tires. >> Oh, yeah. I'm doing a couple episodes of
00:13:48
tires. Why? What? >> Huge. No, I'm saying is I don't know if you're not
00:13:50
>> We talked about it. Remember we did the whole script thing. You know what I
00:13:53
mean? I think that did it. >> We got you that role. >> Oh, on our on the episode. You
00:13:57
>> remember that? Yeah. How many? I'm doing two. Yeah. >> Awesome. What's your name character's
00:14:02
name? >> I don't know. >> What did you want it to be? >> I think you should bring that to the
00:14:06
table. >> I I'd love to do that. >> I think you should just tell them what
00:14:10
you want to play. Go, you know, I've been thinking about it. >> Yeah. >> I'm a senior.
00:14:12
>> Does it matter >> your name? >> Yeah. Yeah. I just don't like all the
00:14:17
every time I played something, it's always like a boring non-creative name. >> I'm always Ken for some reason. I
00:14:23
>> mean, we know the reason. >> Yeah. Or what? I've played I played Jyn
00:14:26
a couple of times. >> Ken Jyn. >> Yeah. What else have I played? Um,
00:14:31
>> dude, I finished all of Bert's show, by the way. >> You saw it? The whole thing?
00:14:35
>> It's awesome. It's on Netflix. >> Wow. Yeah, I know. I think we're
00:14:38
>> It's such an easy watch. >> Is it? >> Yeah. It's great. Yeah. Everyone in it
00:14:41
is funny. It's great. Chris Watowski. Wataski. >> Chris Watowski. Yeah. Am I saying it
00:14:45
right? >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Fantastic. >> He's so funny. >> Yeah, he's great. Kills it. Chicago.
00:14:49
Great dude. It's a funny show, man. >> You You know what's so funny about
00:14:52
Chicago guys? You Chicago guys help each other. >> Well, we like each other.
00:14:55
>> I know, but you guys always help each other. >> San Diego guys don't do that.
00:14:57
>> No, why not? >> Cuz there's not a lot. >> Well, there there's a lot of
00:15:01
>> I see a lot of Chicago guys like, "Hey, you know what? I mean, use that guy."
00:15:05
You know, >> there's some good Well, there's a lot Well, there's a lot from Chicago people
00:15:08
for acting and comedy. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> What do you mean? San Diego has a lot of
00:15:12
famous people. Has Adam Driver never called you? Bobby, I want you TO DO SOMETHING WITH
00:15:17
ME. YEAH. How do you feel about good soup? >> Nick Cannon is from San Diego.
00:15:24
>> Yeah. Yeah, >> dude. Ted Dansen. >> Yo, I need you to babysit for me, Bob.
00:15:30
>> Kids. >> Was that Nick Cannon? >> Hey yo, I need you to babysit for me.
00:15:34
>> For me, my is from San Diego. >> Yeah. Who else? >> Adam Brody.
00:15:40
>> Okay, that's good. I didn't know all these people were from there.
00:15:44
I mean, that's a lot. Tom Weights. >> Wow. >> Wow. Tony Hawk. We know Tony. Sean
00:15:49
White, Bill Walton, Kendra Wilkinson, Tony Gwyn, Junior. Seo. >> Yeah. >> Chris.
00:15:54
>> Interesting. I'm not even on that list. >> You are. Where? >> You are. You're right there. Bobby Lee.
00:15:58
>> Oh, I am. >> Why does it say comedian? >> Nick Cannon. Dude, this is This list is
00:16:05
thick. >> It's a pretty good list. Yeah. >> Cameron Diaz. We skipped over. I thought
00:16:08
she was from Long Beach. >> She is. Yeah. I don't >> know. She was born in San Diego but went
00:16:13
to school. Yeah. Robin Wright >> Penn. >> Yeah. He went to LA school.
00:16:18
>> Is it not? They got a divorce. >> Yeah. >> Long time ago. >> He was so good in that movie. They got a
00:16:22
divorce. Huh. >> Yeah. >> You know, I had dinner with her one time. >> Robin Wright.
00:16:26
>> Yeah. I was in I was in um Michigan. >> Yeah. >> Right. I had a couple of scenes in a
00:16:32
movie and the producer of the movie was dating her. >> Whoa. >> So um I had the producer like have
00:16:40
dinner. You know what I mean? I show up and she was at the dinner. >> Was he a good-looking guy, the producer?
00:16:44
>> Pretty good-looking. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Cuz sometimes you meet these producers
00:16:46
that date these actresses and you're like, "How the fuck?" >> Well, he was a longfaced like Sean. I
00:16:50
think she likes long face. >> She likes a long face. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Like, you know, descriptive like a
00:16:55
president. Like an old president. >> Oh, yes. So, you wouldn't be her type.
00:16:58
No, >> you're a long face. >> But yeah, I'm a long face. Yeah. But but
00:17:01
what I remember about her is be her being very funny. >> I mean, she's so smart and cool.
00:17:06
>> Yeah, she was very funny. Yeah. >> What's your favorite role of hers?
00:17:11
>> Jesus Christ. Um, >> she didn't play that. >> He is. >> I mean, obviously the first time I
00:17:20
noticed her was Princess Bride. >> Yeah. It was really, really good. >> Yeah. And then Jenna.
00:17:28
>> Yeah. Forest Gump is probably the most iconic. >> Iconic. But she was good in Wonder
00:17:31
Woman. Well, she was fun in that. Yeah. Puffed out. Yeah. She's just a super
00:17:37
beautiful though. >> Yeah, she's pretty stunning. >> Stunning. Right. Who do Who you think?
00:17:41
Her or who would you? Sharon Stone or her, you think? >> Her for sure. >> But Sharon Stone in her prime though. Oh
00:17:46
my god. >> No, she's she's >> wholesome. Just beautiful. >> Yeah. Look at that.
00:17:50
>> Wow. What a beautiful girl. >> Gorgeous, mate. Gorgeous. >> Very talented, too.
00:17:54
>> Absolutely lovely. >> Kate Blanch, it's I think the same thing.
00:17:57
>> Not my style, but Yeah. >> Yeah. But just beautiful. Wholesome white. Yeah.
00:18:00
>> What is it? >> Andress just sent me something. Let's see. It's some sort of meme. No, I just
00:18:05
read I this guy won the lottery and so so surprising he found love that day. >> $181 million lottery winner falls in
00:18:15
love. >> Yeah. >> And the lottery winner is the woman. Yeah, >> cuz she that's she won the lottery with
00:18:22
that guy, >> dude. >> Just by chance. >> Two days after. >> Tell me this guy's British 100%, right?
00:18:29
>> Yeah. >> Is he not British? >> No, he's American. This where?
00:18:33
>> North Carolina. I find myself a beauty girl. Dude, wait till you see my Wait
00:18:37
till you see the girl that I got. She don't want nothing from me. >> Isn't that incredible though?
00:18:42
>> She's poisoning him. >> This is basically what happened. >> Life changed.
00:18:48
>> Yeah. Life over. Life over. >> You think it's over? >> The lottery is the worst thing they say
00:18:52
statistically like these people end up killing themselves, going broke. >> You want to hear a statistic?
00:18:57
>> Same thing. Same. >> Love statistics. >> Bobby statistics. We'll be right back.
00:19:05
You want to hear one? Right. People that are um that are in a car accident and paralyzed from the neck down are get are
00:19:13
happier than lottery winners. >> No, you made that up. I didn't >> I mean that sounds
00:19:20
>> I'll tell you why. >> Why? >> Can I tell you why? >> So when you win the lottery, right? Um
00:19:25
you your friends and family, they change, >> right? They all want the money me. Also,
00:19:30
you don't know how to manage money. So, you lose the money quickly. Right. >> Right. You start buying houses and cars
00:19:35
for your friends and all that stuff and the pain it becomes more painful your life.
00:19:40
>> Yeah. Well, more burdened. >> More burden, more pain. You know what I
00:19:43
mean? And um somebody that's in been in a car accident paralyzed from McDown,
00:19:47
right? When they can taste orange juice for the first time, there's super joy
00:19:50
there. When they can move a pinky, right? Like every day, you know, some some new thing happens,
00:19:57
>> right? They they you get more joy and there's more, you know what I mean?
00:20:01
>> The small things matter. >> Small things. And then you realize who
00:20:05
your true friends are and loved ones when you're in a car accident. >> Mhm.
00:20:09
>> Yeah. And so, um, they say that you you're happier. >> I agree. I mean, you see the the history
00:20:15
of all these people that win the lottery is awful. >> It's awful. Yeah. They lose it quickly.
00:20:20
>> Whenever they're always like the guy What was the dude there? Wasn't there a
00:20:24
guy that just killed himself that won that won a lottery not too long ago? Like he just
00:20:29
>> You guys think that this guy's going to lose the love if he loses the money?
00:20:33
>> Yes. >> Yes. >> Mental health struggles very big. The curse. The curse of the lottery. Uh 70%
00:20:40
of lottery winners go broke or face severe financial distress within a few years.
00:20:44
>> That was kind of like Do you remember the show um what was it? Move that bus.
00:20:48
You know that [ __ ] show. >> Extreme Home Makeover. They would give these people these mansions. People that
00:20:53
made like 30 grand a year, they give them a [ __ ] mansion. They couldn't pay the taxes on it. They'd go broke.
00:20:57
Then they'd be in worse financial debt than they were before they got the house.
00:21:00
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Because it's a So they got sued, right? Didn't they get sued? And then
00:21:04
they settled. And then at some point the show had to continue on the air. So what
00:21:08
happened was then the network started paying for the taxes or the whatever so these people wouldn't drown,
00:21:14
>> right? Wow. That's interesting. >> It's a bad It's a bad game.
00:21:19
Hey guys, do you know we're sponsored by Pepsi? Bob, did you see that Pepsi did
00:21:23
another Pepsi challenge? Whoa, whoa, >> whoa, whoa. People still do that? >> Yes, they do still do that. And 66% of
00:21:28
people chose Pepsi Zero Sugar over Coca-Cola Zero Sugar. >> Oh, that that's not even close, dude.
00:21:33
>> I know. 66% of people over what percentage of people chose Coca-Cola Zero?
00:21:38
>> 44%. 34. >> I guess Pepsi doesn't make you good at math. >> Right on, man. Good math.
00:21:43
>> Is that true or >> That is very true. That's right on the number.
00:21:46
>> Perfect. All right, let's take the challenge. I'm going to try I'm going to
00:21:48
try. >> There we go. >> Okay. I'm going to take a straw in the A
00:21:53
and then the B. Ready? And I'm going to try B first. >> No, you go backwards. You always go
00:21:59
backwards. >> I always go backwards because I just >> I'm going to try A first.
00:22:06
>> And then I try B. Okay. Don't say anything. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:22:13
>> Okay. >> Okay. What's yours? >> On the count of three, we'll say.
00:22:16
>> All right. Wait, hold on. >> Close your eyes. >> I gota do it again. Hold on. I gota do
00:22:19
it again. >> You should do it one more time. >> Yeah. >> Oh, yeah.
00:22:27
Got it. >> I got it. >> On the count of three. >> In my mind is also, you know, I'm
00:22:32
parched. I'm in the Sahara Desert, right? I'm dreaming of a cola beverage.
00:22:37
>> We're in a studio in Burbank. >> No, in my mind. Oh, yeah. >> Yeah. What? Like, what would I Right.
00:22:40
I'm parched. Yeah. I'm in the Sahara Desert, right? and I'm trying to find a
00:22:45
liquor store or something or store or convenience store so I can get a beverage. Yeah. I see one in the desert
00:22:50
desert, right? And I >> What if it's a mirage? >> It could be a mirage. And I I only have
00:22:55
one opportunity to buy one beverage. Which one would I pick? What you're going to say? I'm going to say
00:23:00
>> one, two, three, a >> No. >> Let me see. >> Let me see.
00:23:05
>> Oh my god. >> Pepsi, dude. >> No. >> What's yours?
00:23:10
>> I picked Pepsi. >> Yep. >> Wow. >> Got me. If I had an option based on the
00:23:14
TA test, I'm going with the rising star >> because you're a rising star.
00:23:19
>> I'm a rising star. >> Am I? >> Yep. >> I am. >> Yeah, because you chose the 66%.
00:23:23
>> But my star is a little bloated. So, as long as I keep drinking Pepsi Zero
00:23:26
Sugar, it might it might be a shooting star at some point. >> If you want to use that analogy.
00:23:31
>> [ __ ] I did. >> I know. But you have to also think of it this way, dude. I'm an alien. I'm
00:23:36
visiting Earth. >> I'll I'll second that. >> Oh my god. What city am I in?
00:23:41
uh at Los Angeles. >> Hi. >> Hi. >> Um I heard about cola beverages. Can you
00:23:47
give me >> They're phenomenal. >> Are they? This one is the one that's the
00:23:51
best up and rising one. >> Let me tell you something, Alien. >> Yes.
00:23:55
>> I can get you the Pepsi challenge so you can decide for yourself. >> Is this right here?
00:24:01
>> That's it. >> Wow. >> That's the Pepsi challenge right there.
00:24:04
Are you an alien or a robot? >> I am a combination of a cyborg and human parts as well. You know what? I
00:24:10
shouldn't I've never questioned you. I'm sorry. >> I have also um bionatrix.
00:24:15
>> Are you made of biionatric? >> Yes, I am. >> Wonderful. All right. Why don't you take
00:24:19
the Pepsi challenge? What's your name, sir? >> Huh? >> What's your name?
00:24:22
>> Alongo. >> Alongo. >> Alongo. What do you think? >> I love it.
00:24:27
>> Take a sip. >> Okay. Here we go. >> That's not going to short circuit your
00:24:34
insides. >> That's me s short circuiting. >> Okay. Well, drink up before you die.
00:24:38
Yeah. before your system crashes. >> Did you like that one more? >> That one is better. Which one?
00:24:47
What? What? Longo. >> Lango likes what better? >> Pepsi. >> You heard it here first. Lolongo likes
00:24:54
Pepsi more. >> Pepsi. Pepsi Zero Sugar. >> Lango likes Pepsi Zero Sugar more than
00:25:00
Coca-Cola Zero Sugar. >> Go out and try Pepsi Zero Sugar today. Let your taste decide.
00:25:09
The lottery is gross. >> Statistic. >> I'll give you a statistic.
00:25:12
>> Yeah. Yeah. >> Um, smoking a pack of cigarettes is the health equivalent to having unprotected
00:25:21
sex with five prostitutes. >> It is. >> No, I made it up. >> Oh, [ __ ]
00:25:28
>> But it sounded real. >> Sounded pretty real. Yeah. Sounded real. Yeah. Okay. True or false? Let's see if
00:25:31
you can get >> But you know, here I'll give you one covered one, right? Um,
00:25:38
it's better to just be a cigarette smoker um >> for for co >> True.
00:25:49
>> It is. >> It was Yeah, it turned out Yeah. smokers had better better lung capacity.
00:25:53
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Better propensity to like fix themselves.
00:25:56
>> So, you know. >> All right. >> I'm not googling. >> I don't like that you're
00:25:58
>> Yeah, Google it. >> It's true. >> Cuz I look dumb when I Google things
00:26:02
that are the joke. >> No, it's not. It's true. Google it. >> No.
00:26:08
>> No. People that smoke. >> Extensive research authorities like World Health Organization confirmed that
00:26:14
smoking increases the risks of severe illness, hospitalization, and death from COVID 19. In fact,
00:26:18
>> Oh, I made it up. >> Yeah, I made it up. >> Can I tell you? You sold me.
00:26:23
>> I bought it. >> Same. >> Can I give you a statistic? >> Is it real fellow or fake?
00:26:26
>> You tell me if it's true or fake. >> [ __ ] Okay, go ahead. >> All right.
00:26:30
78% of people that got the Johnson and Johnson vaccine drove Dodge Chargers. >> What? 78? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think I
00:26:43
think it's false. >> I think it's false cuz I don't know anybody that brought
00:26:46
>> It's 87. It's 87. It's the other way. >> Yeah. Wow. That's a good one.
00:26:53
>> Ah, that one's for McCone. Mccone. Welcome back, Mone. He's back. Give it
00:26:58
up for Mone. He got stuck in New York City. How was New York, you pig? >> It was great. It was very fun. It was
00:27:06
nice hanging out with you. And Yeah. >> Yeah. We took the boy >> took the boy to Madison Square Garden.
00:27:12
Had a fun little time there. Then we to went then we went to what we thought was
00:27:15
a gay bar, >> but it was just gay night. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> It was all women. We went downstairs and
00:27:21
it was all women. >> Wow. And then it took 5 seconds for the intelligent people to go, "Oh, it's a
00:27:26
gay bar." And these [ __ ] dorks, him and his buddy were like, "There's a lot
00:27:30
of babes here, man." >> They were like, "Great ratio." And they
00:27:33
were all >> I was like, "Great ratio. These women don't like penises."
00:27:36
>> Oh, wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. >> You can tell cuz a girl came up to me and dapped me up right away.
00:27:40
>> She literally goes, "Yo, [ __ ] love your show, dog." And I was like, "Yeah,
00:27:43
thank you, dude." >> Wow, wow, wow, wow. >> Big, by the way, big in the lesbian
00:27:46
community. That's huge. Bad friends. We love that. >> Really? >> Yeah. [ __ ] yeah. We had a lot of fans
00:27:51
there. It was great. Yeah, that's >> made me feel good. >> That's amazing.
00:27:55
>> All right, I really like it. >> Sorry for sharing. >> That's really good. I like it.
00:27:59
>> You go to a gay bar, you find out. >> Yeah, you get recognized at gay bars.
00:28:04
No, >> Bobby, you're back. >> Where have you been? >> Yeah,
00:28:10
>> you bad boy. >> I just got tuned out for a second. It was so weird.
00:28:13
>> Yeah, where are you going? >> Because I had I came up with another
00:28:16
statistic, but then it's like it was it was too late. It was too late to say it
00:28:20
because it we had transitioned onto something else and I just got stuck on it. But it's like I'm not even gonna say
00:28:25
it, but I'm just saying. >> Come on, give it to me. Give it to me. >> It's stupid.
00:28:29
>> They're all stupid. >> So [ __ ] dumb. I don't know why for
00:28:32
like a minute I got hung up on it. You know what I mean? >> You know those people that uh in China
00:28:37
where they can walk like it looks like they're they can walk above the ground
00:28:40
like they're floating when they they're dancing. >> Do you know that? Y
00:28:44
>> Yeah. Did you know that those people that not everyone can do it, but those
00:28:47
people they don't have bone marrow? >> Did you know that? >> Mhm.
00:28:50
>> No, being real. >> Is that a stat? >> Is it 100%. >> What do you mean this? What do you mean
00:28:58
this? >> That's not a good one. >> I know. But that's why. But that's why
00:29:04
for a minute I was thinking about it, right? No, it wasn't. I know it wasn't.
00:29:09
For for some reason I couldn't get my mind I got stuck in it. >> You know what I mean? In my mind I was
00:29:15
like this is not a good one cuz you're making it up obviously. You know what I
00:29:18
mean? >> And then I just couldn't stop thinking about it. >> Bone marrow.
00:29:22
>> Yeah. Exactly. It wasn't even good. That's why I even said I don't even say
00:29:25
anything. >> No, it's fine. >> I just did. It's It's >> Yeah, I know. But you didn't have to go
00:29:29
[ __ ] call me out. >> Well, it was just so >> Yeah. You did this. >> Why did you do this?
00:29:34
>> I didn't like it. >> Yeah, I don't like IT EITHER. I DIDN'T
00:29:36
WANT TO SAY IT. THAT'S TERRIBLE. >> The meal was bad. >> It was bad.
00:29:42
>> I don't want to eat that. >> Like a kid. Get that. What is that?
00:29:45
>> This is the most condescending [ __ ] I've ever seen. Yeah. >> Right.
00:29:49
>> Yeah. Oh my god. I hate that. It's like spitting in someone's face.
00:29:52
>> I didn't spit on you. >> That's basically is like spit in your
00:29:55
face. Yeah. Yeah. God, that's the worst. >> Wipe it away. >> Yeah. Anyway,
00:29:59
>> did you have fun in New York? What else did you do? What'd you get into?
00:30:01
>> I mean, there wasn't much. We were snowed in, but I went to the I went to
00:30:04
the the Met. That was very fun. M >> great museum. >> Yeah. >> You went by yourself?
00:30:09
>> No, I was stay with my friends JACKSON AND ABBY. >> OH, HOW ARE THEY? ANYWAY, um
00:30:16
>> who gives a [ __ ] But anyway, >> shut it down. >> Shut it down.
00:30:22
>> Shut it down. >> Shut it down hard. >> Get the [ __ ] out. >> Shut it down.
00:30:26
>> Yeah. Um that's great. >> No, that is nice. >> You want Tell us what you saw the M.
00:30:31
>> Yeah. >> You don't even want to know. >> What is the beautiful artwork you saw?
00:30:35
Did you have a slice of New York pizza? >> We went to a bar together above uh above
00:30:41
Five Guys. >> That was actually wild. You walk into Five Guys >> like you're going to order and there's a
00:30:48
[ __ ] bouncer by the fryer >> and you hand them your ID and there's a
00:30:52
bar up a secret bar upstairs. >> No. >> Yeah, it was kind of cool. >> And Five Guys.
00:30:55
>> Yeah. And you could take >> inside. >> Inside and you could take some peanuts
00:30:58
to go upstairs and everything. >> Wow. >> It was kind of a cool little bar. It was
00:31:00
like a nice little nook tucked away. Five Guys in the village. Wow. Is that the original Five Guys?
00:31:06
>> No. Uh, the original is Four Guys and that's up the street. >> They just had the one up.
00:31:11
>> Hey, dude. >> That's your That Dude, >> that was bad. >> That was your bone marrow. That was my
00:31:19
bone marrow. >> Yeah, that was your bone marrow. Yeah. Yeah. Four guys. >> No, the original Five Guys I think is in
00:31:24
DC. Am I wrong? >> I believe so. I'm looking >> I think my buddy Tyler took me to the
00:31:28
original Five Guys in >> Arlington. >> Arlington or wherever it is. Arlington,
00:31:32
Virginia. There it is. Yeah, I think I went to that one with him. >> Now, is the original like the original
00:31:38
Panda or the original whatever. Is it better than the the chain of it? >> I mean, I'm sure the locals would say
00:31:44
yes. Right. Cuz they grew. If you had the first, you're always going to be like, we did it. It's like the band.
00:31:48
You're like, I knew that band before. You like that band? >> That album wasn't as good as the first
00:31:52
one that I heard >> because the Cuz the original Panda Express, the actual restaurant
00:31:56
restaurant apparently is very good. >> It's in Pasadena, California. >> What's that called? Panda.
00:32:00
>> Panda in >> Panda In. Right. Is it? >> It's right there. Zoom in, bud. The
00:32:04
original concept for Panda Express started with Panda in sitdown restaurant opened by Andrew and Peggy Chung Chung
00:32:09
in Pasadena 1973 on Foothill Boulevard. It burned down during the fires. However, somehow the chowine did
00:32:15
survive. >> That stuff is just not flammable. >> Chowane is so strong.
00:32:20
>> So strong. >> There's the original. That's Panda Express. The original Panda in. I hate
00:32:24
Panda Express. >> It's It's good in a bind, but um I I want to try Panda in.
00:32:29
>> Let's go. I'd love to go. Is it still open? >> Is there an original McDonald's?
00:32:33
>> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> It's here in California.
00:32:37
>> Yeah, this is open. >> Let's go to it. >> We should try Panda in
00:32:40
>> the first the first McDonald's is in San Bernardino. >> Are you being real?
00:32:44
>> Yes. >> And it's still there. >> I do not know if it's still there. I
00:32:47
think it's a museum now. >> And then the first chain, of course, was in uh Illinois. That's where our boy Ray
00:32:55
Croc stole the idea, took it, and we went there as a on a field trip as kids. >> Yeah. You know what? I'm obsessed with
00:33:01
novelty architecture. >> Love novelty architecture. >> You know what novelty architecture is?
00:33:08
>> Yeah. >> What is it? McCullen. >> Uh, architecture that's kind of silly or
00:33:12
out of the ordinary. It's for the fun of it and the love of it. >> Isn't that fun? Like Ry's Donuts is one.
00:33:16
>> Look at that. That's so funny. They had Idol or that bar in North Hollywood.
00:33:18
I've been to that bar. >> This one? Yeah. >> What is that? >> It's It's a bar on Lanership.
00:33:22
>> Oh. Are those barrels? >> Yeah. I love it. >> And you go sit in the barrels.
00:33:25
>> Wow. >> But then when beer starts filling up in there, it gets scary.
00:33:30
>> I mean, that's a Yeah, >> another one. I know. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:33:34
>> There it is. >> Yeah. >> Whoa. >> But, you know, it's like, you know, how
00:33:37
some like you go to cities all over the country now and they all look the same. >> Why can't we like, you know, express
00:33:45
ourselves in different ways architecture- wise? I mean, in terms is that money? No, we're going. No, the
00:33:50
problem is we're going backwards because what happens is people want stuff that
00:33:54
looks nice and new, but in in fact it actually is just cheaper and poorly built. But they like the idea because
00:34:01
Okay. Like the all these [ __ ] apartment complexes going up. >> Yeah. >> They all look the same.
00:34:05
>> Exact. Yeah. >> Because people want new, right? If they say, "I can't afford a [ __ ] house,
00:34:10
but I want a nice apartment. I want something nice and new. I want a new build. I want no one to live in it." But
00:34:14
the problem is they throw these things up. They c they they they do it with the cheapest materials possible and they
00:34:20
built them so shanty like but people want the image of nice and new from the outside. Yeah. That's why the whole city
00:34:25
of [ __ ] LA looks like that. >> Yes. It's fake luxury. >> It's it's a bummer and it's taking over.
00:34:29
>> And if you look at like um the colors of cars that we have today versus in the
00:34:33
70s. It's like what happened to those fun colors? >> Well, here's the problem now. As a car
00:34:37
guy, it's paint to sample now because they don't sell as well. And their a car
00:34:41
company's main goal is to sell as many. It's volume at the highest level. It's
00:34:46
just sell a billion [ __ ] cars. They don't give a [ __ ] They're made of
00:34:50
plastic. Get rid of That's why leasing started. They were like, "Here, we'll
00:34:53
get it back and then we'll just sell it at a huge discount." That because the
00:34:57
highest colors of cars that sell are like white, black, and gray. And so they're like, "Fuck it. We won't make
00:35:02
any other colors." >> God, it's just made our society and our culture look. It sucks.
00:35:08
>> All of it. >> So now you have to paint a sample. You want a special color? You have to order
00:35:11
a color of a car. It costs more money. Yeah. Like look look >> 1970 the aero the top selling cars were
00:35:17
avocado green, harvest yellow, earthy brown, burnt orange. >> Wow. >> Beautiful.
00:35:22
>> Beautiful. Fun. >> I [ __ ] with a burnt orange. That's such a sexy color on an old car.
00:35:27
>> And what's today now? Is that today? >> Yeah. >> White is 38, black is 19, gray is 15.
00:35:31
Those are the highest that I set. >> Oh my god. >> Silver and blue are nine and seven. Red
00:35:35
is five. It doesn't even happen anymore unless it's Ferrari. >> Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow.
00:35:39
>> Yellow. >> It's incredible what happened. >> Well, let me be honest. Yellow is the
00:35:42
[ __ ] yellow stinks. >> Yeah, yellow's weird. Hard. >> Yellow in a car is not it.
00:35:46
>> It's hard. Yeah. Yeah. >> It's not It doesn't do it for me.
00:35:48
>> Midnight purple would be fun. Ooh. >> Hello. >> Is that the nickname for your penis?
00:35:53
>> Yeah. Midnight purple, dude. Yeah. >> Hey, dude. >> Midnight purple.
00:35:58
>> This. What's the opposite of this? >> That's it. Dude, >> what's the color of your car? What is
00:36:06
that color called? It's like baby. >> That's why I like it. It's like It's
00:36:09
like a a a soft baby blue. Soft baby blue. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Not a hard baby blue.
00:36:14
>> It's like that. >> Yeah. >> It's exactly right. It's like a It's
00:36:17
like a card. It's like Yeah. It's like this. Well, >> kind of. I guess. Right.
00:36:21
>> A little lighter than that. A little lighter than that. >> Houston oiler blue. The kid goes right
00:36:24
to Texas stuff. >> Yeah. >> That's what I see when I see his car.
00:36:27
>> When are you going to move to Texas? The rumor is you're moving to Texas.
00:36:30
>> No. >> Everyone on the street's talking about it. >> No, I'm not leaving LA.
00:36:33
>> Everybody says, Do you know this? People around LA are saying he's going back.
00:36:36
He's going to Austin. >> Oh, no. >> He keeps going there. He's looking for a
00:36:39
place to live. I already have a place over. >> Oh, Spaghettio. >> You have a You own a place in Austin?
00:36:44
>> My sister and I do. >> Oh, >> really? Where is it? >> Uh, South Congress. It's like in the
00:36:49
Yeah, >> by one of those boot shops. >> No, it's actually like by like a Verizon
00:36:54
store. It's like a random neighborhood. >> You know that on South Congress? That
00:36:57
was the funniest neighborhood back in the day. I used to love going down there. And now it's a Lululemon and a
00:37:00
[ __ ] Soul Cycle and a >> Right. >> So House. >> So House and Earth Bar.
00:37:06
>> It's just It's here. It's California now. I like that strip in Austin where
00:37:09
they have that pizza place. What's it called? >> By right across the grocery store from
00:37:12
the booth. We went. I know. It's so good. >> What is it [ __ ] called?
00:37:15
>> I don't know. I love that place. >> Why can't I think of the name? Home
00:37:18
Slice. >> Home Slice. Yeah, that place was [ __ ] good. >> Slice. >> Yeah, it's a good good slice of pizza.
00:37:22
>> Yeah. Yeah. >> Talk space. >> You know, you know, I do therapy every
00:37:25
week. Same. >> And uh Talkspace has uh saved my life because um you know, you need to release
00:37:33
the demons. >> You got to release, man. And um you know I had a lot of trauma growing up and um
00:37:37
you know using EMDR and other methods through talkspace has really um relieved and taken some of the burden off my
00:37:44
shoulders. A lot of it actually >> that's because talkspace is the number
00:37:47
one rated online therapy bringing you professional support from licensed therapists and psychiatrists that you
00:37:52
can access anytime anywhere. >> Talkspace helps you build confidence and skills there. Our therapists not only
00:37:59
listen to you, they provide valuable techniques to manage stress or conflict in your life, helping improve your
00:38:06
coping skills and self-awareness. >> Let's be honest, okay? It's always nice
00:38:10
to talk to somebody. All jokes aside, this is a comedy show, but we all like to talk stuff out. And Talkspace makes
00:38:15
it easier, and they make getting the help you need easy, accessible, and affordable. Plus, most insured members
00:38:21
have a $0 co-ay. As a listener of this podcast, you'll get $80 off your first
00:38:26
month with TalkSpace when you go to talkspace.com/badfriends and enter promo code space 80.
00:38:32
>> That's s pac80 to match with the licensed therapist today. Go to talkspace.com/badfriends
00:38:38
and enter promo code space 80. Avocado green mattress. >> I'm so excited to tell you about our
00:38:43
sponsor Avocado Green Mattress. Their certified organic mattresses, pillows, and al and solid wood furniturees are
00:38:50
made without harmful chemicals with thoughtfully chosen materials designed to support healthier living and more
00:38:57
restorative sleep. >> I got to tell you something. We we got to upgrade. Uh thank you to Avocado
00:39:02
Green Mattress. And I'm telling you, it is uh healthier home environment and so
00:39:08
comfortable and it's better for you and the planet. So, you're killing so many
00:39:11
birds with one mattress. Okay. Hey, they got sleep trials of one year to ensure you're getting the best mattress for
00:39:17
you. Uh, if you want calm, grounded living, well-designed sleep space, promotes a sense of calm, and I'm
00:39:21
telling you, help reduce stress after a long day. Got to lay down on one of these things. They're amazing.
00:39:26
>> Built to last, too, bud. >> They really are durable, high quality
00:39:28
materials. Avocado products are an investment in long-term vitality, not a short-term fix.
00:39:35
>> Sleep matters. Avocado dream of better. And now they're having a great sale on
00:39:39
mattresses. Go to avocadogreenmattress.com/badfriends to get up to 15% off. That's
00:39:44
avocadmattress.com/badfriend for up to 15% off mattresses. >> Avocadogmattress.com/badfriends.
00:39:53
>> Rocket money. >> Rocket money. You You saved me so much money on Rocket Money.
00:39:56
>> Yes, I did. >> Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps you find and cancel your
00:40:01
unwanted subscriptions, monitoring your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings.
00:40:07
>> We've all heard about it. You've heard these ads a thousand times before all
00:40:10
over the place because it works. Rocket Money helps you reach your financial goals much faster because what they do
00:40:15
is they create a dashboard where you can see all of the things that you're spending money on. Whether it's games
00:40:20
like Bobby on your phone and subscriptions you forgot you signed up for. There's so much nonsense you're
00:40:25
paying for. Let Rocket Money clean it up for you. >> Yeah, >> you saved so much money when I Well, you
00:40:31
did more than me. I saved a little bit. You saved a lot more thanks to Rocket Money because you were paying for so
00:40:36
many different subscriptions. >> So many subscriptions. I had a meditation subscription I never used.
00:40:39
>> Hundreds of dollars wasted. >> Some a couple of video game like games.
00:40:42
>> A couple like 20 >> 20 of them. That's fine. I saved um I don't want to disclose it but thousands
00:40:47
and thousands of dollars a year. >> That's a lot of money that you save
00:40:49
while using all those apps premium features. Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join
00:40:54
right now at rocketmoney.com/badfriends. That's rocketmoney.com/badfriends. One more time.
00:40:59
>> Rocketmoney.com/badfriends. You you keep the troops in line, these boys.
00:41:04
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. >> You don't do that with your crew?
00:41:07
>> They're all subject to NDAs. So, I have uh >> [ __ ] We never made these guys sign NDAs
00:41:14
for the tour. >> These guys. >> Too late. >> Mone has one. >> Yeah. Adam, they could ruin our careers.
00:41:21
>> Yeah. Once we get a career, they could [ __ ] bury us. >> I'm actually here uh to get them to
00:41:25
unionize. I'm trying to take down all of the podcast. Yeah. >> Haha. Very funny, right guys?
00:41:32
>> I'm funny. >> Dude, you guys deserve to own the means of production.
00:41:36
>> Totally. We've been saying that for six years. >> Yeah, it's a it's a
00:41:40
>> This is a republic, man. This is not >> This is a Republic. >> Yeah, this is a Republic,
00:41:44
>> dude. I know, dude. >> This this podcast Burbank is, too. >> How far is Jay Leno's cars?
00:41:51
>> He lives upstairs. >> He does. >> Yeah, he'll come down in the middle of
00:41:54
this. >> How is he okay? He just keeps like uh getting into slapstick style kind of uh
00:41:59
accidents. He's I think he's doing a lot of Pratt falling. >> I think there's
00:42:04
>> the video of him the video of him where he's like I'm fine and then he gets in
00:42:08
the car. That one is just >> he like he just fell down. >> Well, where he hits the fire hydrant
00:42:13
where he's like I mean he's a colleague so and a friend. I mean like I I'm not This is
00:42:21
Yeah. The burn accident like Oh my god. He's I hope he's okay. I think he's got to be
00:42:29
okay, man. He's still doing car shows every week. >> Burn accident. >> How many?
00:42:33
>> Horrific garage accident. This man death follows him everywhere he goes.
00:42:38
>> He's like in the movie Final Destination. >> Do you know him?
00:42:43
>> Yeah. Brand new face. >> Adam, do you know him? >> Jay? >> Yeah.
00:42:46
>> Oh, yeah. Yeah. >> What? >> Yeah. Yeah. >> You guys served in Vietnam together?
00:42:51
>> Well, it's a we uh there's like, you know, like the Harvard club.
00:42:56
Yeah. It's like, but it's like for talk show host. >> Oh, talk show.
00:42:59
>> So, it's me, Leno, uh >> what's uh >> Bill Maher? >> Kelsey Lately,
00:43:07
>> uh yeah, the one uh who else? I don't know. >> Jimmy Fallon. >> Jimmy Fallon. Uh that British guy that
00:43:13
no one likes. >> Cordon. I mean, sorry. He's a friend. >> Are you guys Are your boys with him?
00:43:19
Bobby, you're boys with him. >> He produced something I was in. >> What did he produce?
00:43:22
>> That game show I did. Terrible. >> What was it called? How to be a fatso
00:43:26
from England. >> Apparently he's terrible to uh like in a restaurant. >> Well, the rumor was Balthazar.
00:43:35
>> He was like a [ __ ] >> Yeah. Yeah. What's his name? Uh uh the
00:43:38
who's the restaurant tour that owns Balthazar? Uh >> Andreas. >> What? Not Jose Andreas, you [ __ ]
00:43:44
idiot. >> I'm sorry. I'm sorry. >> No. No. No. No. No. You guys are
00:43:47
inspiring me to talk to these idiots. >> Keith McN. Keith. >> Keith McN. Yeah. Yeah. He wrote that
00:43:52
post. >> You blushed. You blush. >> I'm used to get the just from one side.
00:43:57
>> YOU DON'T EVER BLUSH. MAN UP. YOU YOU REPRESENT BAD FRIENDS. DON'T BLUSH.
00:44:02
YOU'RE RIGHT. WHY? That's nice. Yeah. Don't act like a [ __ ] dude. >> Stop. Don't talk to him that way.
00:44:08
>> Hey, [ __ ] you. Adam Fmon. >> No, guys. >> He's Jamaican. Adam,
00:44:15
>> it's a complete honor and a privilege to be really. >> Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I'm here. I'm here uh
00:44:21
in Los Angeles just visiting and this is this is one of the stops I'm making.
00:44:25
>> What are you doing in LA? >> Yeah. >> Um >> you hate LA.
00:44:29
>> I don't No, no. I don't hate LA. >> Don't do that. >> No, no. I'm not. No, no, no, no, no, no,
00:44:33
no. I like LA. It's It's gorgeous. Yeah, I'm from here. I was born here.
00:44:37
>> Yeah, but you're a New York guy. >> Yeah, I'm a New York guy.
00:44:40
>> You're a New York guy. >> Yeah. Yeah. CL I mean I'm just Jewish
00:44:43
and wearing glass. >> That's what I meant. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> We like We like to keep you guys over
00:44:47
there. They're Jews in LA. >> I know. But here they're there. We keep
00:44:50
them in order. We keep them >> where? The Pico Robertson era area. >> There or Century City or Beverly Hills?
00:44:56
>> Fairfax. South Beverly Hills. South Fairfax. >> Do you like have a wall around the the
00:45:01
>> They wouldn't let us sort of Warsaw get I think it's pretty popular to be I Who
00:45:06
do you think runs the industry that we work in? >> Chinese people. >> Yeah. No, that's not true at all.
00:45:11
>> Seriously? >> No. No. No. No. >> You don't think the Chinese run us?
00:45:13
>> No. No. the I I do I on stage I I do a joke about if they how they have to not
00:45:20
take it from the Jews Hollywood and if they did you know Bobby they would make like what going to work one going to
00:45:27
work two and stuff the Chinese >> it would be terrible >> these movies
00:45:33
>> I'm just saying if they ran it instead of the juice >> packed a train is a good movie
00:45:37
>> yeah it would be called yeah >> we don't know how to wait in line do you
00:45:42
ever think about what it's like just there >> in China. >> Yeah.
00:45:45
>> Yeah. I haven't been. Have you been? >> No, but it's just what for like 60 years
00:45:49
they're just going like >> Yep. >> Is that dynamite? >> No. I'm just like assembly line. That's
00:45:57
>> He would be the worst at assembly. That's how slow he goes. >> Yeah. Fire.
00:46:01
>> I'd be terrible at being Chinese. I be I'd be one of the worst Chinese
00:46:04
imaginable. >> The little American kids get easy. >> Their whole life they're just this.
00:46:09
>> That's what they get. That's what they get. >> Imagine. And I have a I have a I have my
00:46:13
own uh YouTube Jewish style long form interview talk show and I complain. Look at this. This is way This is terrible.
00:46:20
>> She loves it. >> She loves it. >> Also, what are they dreaming? What are
00:46:24
they thinking? >> Are they [ __ ] >> They're going to the club and [ __ ]
00:46:26
really quick. >> How do they get drunk >> at work? >> Yeah. >> No, they're not getting No, they're
00:46:31
they're not allowed to go to the bathroom at work. They have to poop their pants. They have to
00:46:36
>> I just think Yeah. What What's What do they do for fun over there? It just it
00:46:41
feels so foreign. >> Okay, we're we're working in a factory, Adam. Okay, I'm not going to work in a
00:46:45
factory. >> No, let's do a scenario. >> Yeah, go ahead. Oh my god, that was a
00:46:50
tough you. Hey, Cha Chong. >> Hey, what's up? That's racist. >> Oh, holy [ __ ] I like the way you talk.
00:46:56
>> Oh yeah, I just I spent some time in America. >> We have to be back here in 2 hour. What
00:47:00
do we do? You don't get >> Do we sleep, eat, sleep, eat, or party? >> You don't get two hours. you there's a a
00:47:06
suicide net if you want to jump off the roof and then you have to go back and make more iPhones.
00:47:10
>> Have you jumped into the net yet? >> No. Trron. >> Yeah. >> Oh wow.
00:47:14
>> You got to jump. It's a little bouncy. There it is. I've been in that net.
00:47:17
>> Dude, that's so crazy. >> What is What do What do they do after
00:47:20
work? Yeah. What do they do after work? >> They go home. >> Are they watching Mandalorian?
00:47:24
>> Yeah. >> What do they do? >> They eat. They eat. >> They eat and they go to bed immediately.
00:47:30
They go to bed cuz they got to be up in three more hours. >> There's no TV.
00:47:33
>> It's a tough life. Well, I'm glad there's no TV because the TV sucks.
00:47:36
They're smart to not have TV. >> TV is awesome. You get to They have sports games.
00:47:41
>> Yeah, sports TV is different, but TV shows like name a TV show you like.
00:47:47
>> Sopranos >> that's on right now that is a current show. >> Uh, inside the NBA.
00:47:53
>> Yeah. See >> non-sports shows. >> What's a good show right now?
00:47:58
>> I don't know. >> See, >> and just like that. [ __ ] you. I like
00:48:02
I've seen every episode. I've seen every episode. I've seen EVERY EPISODE.
00:48:04
>> WHY? CUZ I'M NOT A good actor. >> No, I thought you were great.
00:48:07
>> You know, Sarah Jessica was on my show, actually. >> I love her. >> Yeah. Yeah.
00:48:10
>> Don't She's so nice and all. >> She's awesome. She's awesome.
00:48:13
>> She's the president of Girls. >> Yeah. >> Who's your Who's your white whale for
00:48:16
your show? >> Uh Amy Schumer, probably. Or >> uh white for the show? I don't know. She
00:48:23
like Amy Schumer. What? I've never met her. Oh. Oh. Mojaba. Oh, come on. We love her. We're just having
00:48:40
Come on. >> Yeah. Is she nice? >> Is she nice? >> Yeah. >> Well, yeah. I see her at the meetings.
00:48:45
>> Yeah. Yeah. >> She's like, I'm Chuck Shimmer's niece.
00:48:50
>> Yeah. She says that to me. I'm like, I'm supposed to be impressed by
00:48:54
>> Whose niece are you? >> Whose niece am I? >> BB Netanyahu. >> Hell yeah.
00:48:59
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. You got to be somebody's somebody has a piece of
00:49:03
>> Oh, no. I I've gotten none of the advantages of uh >> You have no Nepo [ __ ]
00:49:08
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No. >> Waste of time. >> I know. It sucks.
00:49:10
>> Get out of this business. >> That's what my parents told me the the
00:49:13
night before I moved to New York. >> Well, don't listen to those Jews. I
00:49:15
mean, but honestly, >> no. I mean, like seriously, like they were like, "We don't know anyone in the
00:49:20
uh in the entertainment industry." >> But as as good as you are, as funny as
00:49:23
you are, as talented as you are, to not have anything to help you out stinks. >> Nick Mullen pretty much. That's the only
00:49:29
and he's an anti-semite. I mean, it's ironic. Yeah. Like it's pretty much the
00:49:33
only person that's ever >> like uh No. Yeah. I remember like I thought cuz uh I started in DC and I was
00:49:42
like I was like the glasses Jewish guy in like the local scene and then I moved to New York and I told my parents I was
00:49:49
like they're like we don't have any connections in show business. You're
00:49:52
going to fail. You're an idiot. And then I moved to New York and there were like
00:49:55
there were probably 2,000 guys named Adam Freeland. Literally Adam Freel like just me.
00:50:01
>> Jews. >> Yeah. There's nothing special about me whatsoever. Yeah. Yes, there is.
00:50:05
>> To do standup, you know. >> You know, there's something special.
00:50:07
>> There's something very special about you. >> Oh, I have a I have a little secret.
00:50:16
>> I'll never tell. Uh, no. >> Where were you born in the city? Where
00:50:19
were you born? >> Santa Monica. >> You were born in the west. >> I'm on the Wikipedia.
00:50:21
>> The west side. Uh yeah. Uh I'm on the Wikipedia St. John's Hospital.
00:50:26
>> Are you really? Yeah. One of the most famous guys born there. >> Well, Marisa Marisa Hargate.
00:50:31
>> Marishka Hargatee. Big fans of her at this show. >> She she was uh she's on the list next to
00:50:35
me. Notable patients. >> It's not not cool when you guys make lists, but this one's good.
00:50:41
>> Is this Wikipedia? >> Freedelland is >> who writes it. Can you you can check out
00:50:45
like WHAT >> HE'S THE FORMER >> fiance of podcaster Dasha. Oh yeah. is
00:50:51
currently engaged to >> Wait, no. Come on. Don't >> How does this know this?
00:50:55
>> She gets mad that >> Well, did you put this out there? >> No. No. Look at the editors. You can
00:50:59
check. Oh god, guys. This is This was terrible for me. >> Hot. >> Hot.
00:51:05
>> I was When I did the photo shoot for that article they did. >> Comedy Central presents.
00:51:11
>> Taking it easy. >> Shane text me. He was like, "It's actually making me so mad how gay this
00:51:15
is." >> That's a cool photo, D. >> That's a cool photo, Dad.
00:51:18
>> And I love those chairs that you have on your show. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, no, but I was on
00:51:22
the chair. They asked me to do like or on the floor and I was like, "Can can
00:51:25
you not use these?" I like stopped in the middle of it and they used it as the
00:51:28
main picture. And every comics group chat was like, "Fuck this guy." Uh,
00:51:34
yeah, that's cute. And also like look at my cheeks. They like airbrushed me.
00:51:39
Disgusting. >> What do you mean they airbrushed you? >> Like look at that. I I mean I have acne
00:51:43
scarring. They got rid of >> Yeah. >> Good though. My They can never get rid
00:51:47
of mine. I have this big chunk here. They can't. Even if they try, they're
00:51:50
like, "It gets >> Were you Accutane?" >> Yo, yeah, dude. >> Yeah, me too.
00:51:53
>> 100%. >> Me, too. >> Twice. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> How much uh how much Rage Against the
00:51:57
Machine do you listen to when you're on Accutane? >> Literally, that's all I would listen to.
00:52:04
>> [ __ ] YOU, DAD. >> IT MAKES YOU AGGRESSIVE. >> UH, it makes you crazy.
00:52:08
>> It makes you kind of crazy. It makes you a little manic. >> Yeah. I took it my senior year and I was
00:52:13
doing my college essays and uh >> Did you pick at your acne? Is that why they're scarring? No, this was because a
00:52:18
group would it would group and then and then >> we had cystic ac cystic acne.
00:52:22
>> So it would layer it. >> But what's the cause of that kind of
00:52:25
acne? >> Asian people probably in my proximity. >> The more of you that were around
00:52:30
>> really. You grew up around Asian people. >> They were everywhere these people. You
00:52:34
can't get rid of them. >> I grew up uh in Vegas actually. >> A lot of this is from
00:52:38
>> there were a lot of Filipinos. >> You like that? You like them? >> I love I love them too.
00:52:42
>> Those are good. >> They're the best ones. They're the good.
00:52:45
>> They're the second best people. What's the first? >> Mexican.
00:52:48
>> I love Mexican. >> Yeah. Third. >> What's mine? >> Yeah.
00:52:52
>> Yeah. Um, >> what's your rank power ranking races? >> Oh,
00:52:55
>> we should do We're like Bill Simmons. >> Okay. I I could do my Asian list.
00:52:59
>> Yeah. Yeah. What's your list? >> Do you have an Asian list? >> No, no, not not Asians. Just every kind
00:53:02
of person. >> Every kind of person. >> Also, I cut off an injury. >> Okay.
00:53:06
>> Okay. >> This was good. >> Um, yeah. Top three races. >> Can I say fat whites?
00:53:13
>> Fat whites is up there. Some of the worst people. No, I love fight white cuz
00:53:16
they're nice to me. >> No, >> good-looking whites are not as nice.
00:53:19
True. >> The guys are good. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, let's go. No.
00:53:23
Korean. >> Korean's the best race for you. >> Number one. >> Well, I'm Korean. I have to say that.
00:53:27
>> Okay. Yeah. Yeah. >> I wouldn't put you top 25. >> Okay. Number two, Filipinos.
00:53:32
>> Yeah. >> Yeah. Three, Mexicans. >> Mhm. >> Yeah. Four, any kind of black.
00:53:39
>> Any kind. >> Even like Minnesota. >> Yeah. I like Minnesota. The Chappelle
00:53:43
Lacy's of blacks. I like that guy. He's good. I mean, hey guys, I'm going to do
00:53:46
an ali. >> Yeah, right. >> Yeah. >> Who's that? >> You know how some black um black people?
00:53:52
>> Let's hear it. >> Well, you know the I like Bugazi and I like the Ali.
00:53:57
>> No. >> You know how they >> He likes black guys that like metal.
00:54:01
>> Oh, like all black guys. >> Yeah. Yeah. All black guys. Yeah. Yeah.
00:54:04
>> You have you ever met vampire Mexicans? >> Oh, yeah. I love that.
00:54:07
>> In El Paso, you go El Paso, Texas. You know, they got them here. They like
00:54:11
Marsa. They like >> Dallas. Yeah. Yes. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I like
00:54:16
those. Yeah. Yeah. >> What's that? >> Goth black. >> Black guys. Like goth music is
00:54:20
>> Yeah. I love goth blacks. >> Goth blacks are cool. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Look at Oh my
00:54:24
god. They're my favorite. >> Look like I know Trinity. >> It's crazy because they always sound
00:54:30
like they're from California, even if they're not. >> Morph Morpheus style. Yeah. Morphe style
00:54:34
guys. >> Yeah. Yeah. Those are my favorite. >> Yeah. Yeah. As they try to go super
00:54:38
saiyan, they think it's a real thing. >> Yeah. Those guys. Yeah. That's cool.
00:54:42
Yeah. Yeah. At my shows wearing sunglasses in the audience. >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? Like a like a
00:54:48
snake dark purple jacket. >> Yeah. I like that. No shirt. >> Yeah. No shirt.
00:54:54
>> Yeah. Shirtless. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> A tattoo of some sort of number.
00:54:57
>> Punk. Punk. Is this punk Mexican? >> Punk Mexicans are great. >> Oh, I love that.
00:55:00
>> Smith's Mexicans are the best. >> Yeah. Smith. That is >> Smith's Mexicans. I grew up with a with
00:55:06
a lot of Mexicans and uh I became like uh I I earned their respect because I smoked mot uh I also smoked weed and
00:55:16
they're like oh they Jewish kids they like they like weed too and I was like
00:55:19
yeah yeah and uh they were like tell me Adam like you're like a emo and I was
00:55:24
like no I don't know >> and I was like I was like I like like radio head and like I don't know I guess
00:55:30
I like music and he's like they're like you like loitz and I was like yeah I
00:55:34
love the Smiths and uh they're like they were really into the Smiths but specifically Morrisy. And I was like and
00:55:40
I was like but I was like it's weird that you guys are uh into Morrisy because like you're homophobes you're a
00:55:46
homophobe. And they're like that's a [ __ ] up thing to say about Morrisy
00:55:50
man. Like they didn't know they didn't get that he was gay. >> Like they had no idea.
00:55:55
>> Hims hairs. When hair starts to thin confidence can too. That's why HIMS makes it simple to
00:56:02
feel like your yourself again with access to simple personalized care that fits your life and your hair goals.
00:56:10
Doctor trusted ingredients like finasteride minoxidil can stop further hair loss and regrow hair in as little
00:56:15
as 3 to six months. You shouldn't have to go out of your way to feel like yourself. Hims brings expert care right
00:56:21
to you. 100% online access to personalized treatment plans that put your hair goals first. No hidden fees,
00:56:27
no surprise cost, just real personalized care on your schedule. >> Think of HIMS as your digital front
00:56:33
door. It gets you back to your old self. Simple 100% online access to trusted treatments for real health concerns all
00:56:39
in one place and for simple online access to personalized and affordable care for hair loss, weight loss, and
00:56:43
more. Visit hymns.com/badfriends. >> That's hymns.com/badfriends for your free online visit.
00:56:50
>> hymns.com/badfriends. Future products include compounded drug products with the FDA does not approve
00:56:54
or verify for safety, effectiveness, or quality. Prescription required. See website for full details. Restrictions.
00:56:59
Important safety information. Individual results may vary based on studies of topical and oral minoxidal finasteride.
00:57:04
>> Factor. >> I have goals. >> Yeah, I got I got more goals than you. I
00:57:08
feel like >> Yeah, you do actually when it comes to food. And how are you meeting it
00:57:12
>> from factor? >> Exactly. >> Thank you to factor. Cold days, big
00:57:15
goals. No time to cook. Factor Meals makes healthy eating easy with fully prepared meals designed by dietitians
00:57:21
and crafted by chefs. So eat well without the planning or the cooking. We got a fridge full of factor meals here
00:57:27
in the studio and they're fantastic because we're always on the go. We're on
00:57:31
the move and I want something healthy and delicious that is also high protein calorie smart Mediterranean they got in
00:57:36
there. They got diet friendly stuff. GLP1 support and ready to eat salads all for us on the go. No refined sugars, no
00:57:43
artificial sweeteners, no refined seed oils, quality, functional ingredients, including lean proteins, colorful
00:57:50
veggies, whole food ingredients, and healthy fats. >> Always fresh. It's never frozen. It's
00:57:54
ready in about 2 minutes. I mean, it's so fast. You need a good meal uh that's
00:57:58
delicious and healthy, help you reach your goals, whatever they may be, you got to try Factor, man. Head over to
00:58:03
factormeals.com/badfriends50 off and use the code badfriends50 off to get 50% off and free breakfast for a
00:58:11
year. >> Eat like a pro this month with factor. >> New subscribers only varies by plan. One
00:58:17
free breakfast item per box for one year while subscription is active. >> Shopify.
00:58:23
>> Hey guys, we have an online business. If you have an online business, you got to
00:58:25
do Shopify because I'm You want something reliable? >> Yeah, I do. >> Yeah. Easy dashboard,
00:58:30
>> simple to use, easy and efficient. You can accelerate your efficiency whether
00:58:34
you're uploading new products or trying to improve existing ones. Shopify is
00:58:38
packed with helpful AI tools that write product descriptions, page headlines, and even enhance your product
00:58:42
photography. Thankfully for Shopify, they help our online business get whatever we need to seamlessly and
00:58:49
easily. And also, they got great customer support. What if I what if people haven't heard about your brand?
00:58:54
Shopify helps you find your customers with easy to run email and social media campaigns.
00:59:00
>> Best part is that iconic purple Shop Pay button that's used by millions of
00:59:03
businesses around the world. That's why they got the best conversion in checkout
00:59:07
on the planet. It helps you boost those conversions. Less carts are going to go uh unabandoned and more sales for you.
00:59:14
All right, so it's time to turn those whatifs into with Shopify today. >> Sign up for your $1 per month trial
00:59:21
today at shopify.com/badfriends. Go to shopify.com/badfriends. >> Shopify.combadfriends.
00:59:29
>> Genuinely though, who all jokes aside, who is the one that you want to get on
00:59:33
there so bad? >> Uh, >> there's got to be someone that you're
00:59:36
like, you know, who'd be [ __ ] perfect for this show that won't do it? >> Uh, Sydney Sweeney. No cam. Just no. No,
00:59:43
no, just no cameras. No, no condoms. No cameras. >> No card, no condom. >> Uh, I don't know. Obama.
00:59:52
>> That'd be fun. Hey, have you chilled with him, Bobby? >> He's He's been here.
00:59:55
>> I just met him. You just met Obama? >> I did just meet him. >> What was it like?
00:59:59
>> It's a little annoying. >> No, >> no, no, no. It was wonderful. It was
01:00:02
great. It was It was really good. >> Yeah, he's like magic. >> Sweet. Such a sweet like uh aphable and
01:00:08
also like disarming. Right as you talk to him, you're like, "Oh, I feel good.
01:00:11
This is fine." >> I want to ask him if he's depressed. >> I did.
01:00:14
>> What? Oh, you did already. >> Yep. I said, "How do you feel? You look
01:00:17
like you're depressed." No. You know what it is? I bet you he's >> Can you imagine what it's like to be
01:00:21
Obama? It's got to suck. >> Yeah. >> Why? >> Cuz all the time. Everything is all the
01:00:26
time and you're the one. >> He's [ __ ] Neo. It's like >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He is the one. Yeah.
01:00:30
Yeah. >> You're the one. You're the one. You're the one for all the good and all for the
01:00:33
bad. >> Well, no. More so. It's just like everything everything went crazy after
01:00:38
he was the president. >> That's what I mean. It's all >> He's got to be like, is it my fault?
01:00:42
>> Well, 100%. >> Yeah. >> Are you doing Yeah, that's that's what
01:00:44
he looked like when I met him. >> Really? >> Yeah. >> Really? That looks a lot like Morpheus
01:00:49
from the uh from the movie The Matrix. >> Sure. If you're smallminded, but this is
01:00:53
if you really know what's going on in the world. >> He probably always has to be nice, too.
01:00:58
>> Uh >> when he's out in public. Yeah. Yeah. >> Do you feel like you have to?
01:01:01
>> Yeah, but I don't have that kind of image. >> But But >> you have a bad boy image.
01:01:05
>> Yeah, you do. You think I have a bad boy image? You do. >> I'm nice to everybody.
01:01:08
>> NO, I'M NICE TO EVERYBODY. >> NO. Everyone says like you're
01:01:12
>> I dab. >> No. You're at the Viper room. Sunset strip. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I kiss the sidewalk
01:01:17
where River died. >> There's a lot of stories I hear about people. >> I always do. I'll miss you, River.
01:01:22
>> When someone meets me and they'll go, you know, I met Bobby when he was in
01:01:25
town or whatever. >> And I'll go, "Oh, yeah." And they'll go,
01:01:28
"Yeah, he's like threw a fork and like yelled at the server and we loved it."
01:01:32
>> Yeah. Yeah. >> They love they they love when he's a [ __ ] maniac.
01:01:35
>> I'm You know that's not true. You know that I'm a nice guy.
01:01:39
>> No, but I'm saying you do. You play >> I don't do that. >> You play bits with people. You guys You
01:01:42
guys got a pipe up. You do bits and we know what you [ __ ] do. uh people with less money than you.
01:01:47
>> Yeah, >> he does like doing bits with strangers and then it leaves he likes it's like
01:01:52
his uh what Bill Murray he like he wants to be Bill Murray. He wants to like leave a nugget of a do you know what
01:01:58
Bobby did here when he was here loves that [ __ ] >> Yeah. He like went to a wedding and
01:02:03
Yeah. >> You do love that. Don't lie. >> I guess so. Yeah, >> you do.
01:02:07
>> You're a rambling man. >> What? >> A rambling man. >> I'm a rambling man.
01:02:15
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Marbo like marorrow man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you know,
01:02:19
>> dick hammer. We love >> you do that kind of thing. You go to like a random bar mitzvah and you like
01:02:23
Bobby Lee just chilled with us all night. >> I would do that. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. That sounds kind of sick
01:02:27
actually. Yeah. >> Not a bar mitzvah. >> You wouldn't do a party. He would do it
01:02:32
if he would do it if it's like a uh >> if it was like a small click somewhere
01:02:37
at a private little thing. He would bust in on that. >> Oh, famous people.
01:02:41
>> Oh, he loves that. >> Oh, I love it. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. Famous.
01:02:45
>> Famous. >> You want to be famous? >> Who's the most famous person you have in
01:02:48
your phone? >> I It's not like him. >> What? >> Already? It's not like him. He has way
01:02:53
more. >> I'm going to ask him next. But yeah, who's yours? >> Um,
01:02:58
[ __ ] man. Uh, >> it's not in my phone. Look. >> What? Yep. Oh, no.
01:03:05
>> I know. I know. I know. >> Oh, no. He goes, >> I know. Oh no. Look at that. Look at
01:03:14
that. Look, look, look at it. >> What are you doing there, dude? Like, can you
01:03:20
>> It looks like I was going to point at something. >> Yeah. Can you text a pic of me just
01:03:23
going like this? >> Who is that? Your girlfriend or wife or >> That's my wife. Yeah.
01:03:29
>> Yeah. >> Yeah. Who do you have? >> I don't know. I don't I don't There's no
01:03:33
one I You know, everyone that I know. >> That's not even Travis Kelce. Do you
01:03:38
have his number? >> NO. YOU LYING [ __ ] DO YOU HAVE TRAVIS KELCE'S NUMBER?
01:03:44
>> NO. >> You really don't. So, how do you go? How do you hang out with him?
01:03:47
>> DM. >> Oh, you DM him on Instagram. >> Only DM? Oh, no. On on Twitter. We don't
01:03:51
use Instagram. >> Okay. All right. Only on >> Who's your most famous?
01:03:55
>> I'm not No one really. Stav >> our boy Shane. Maybe >> maybe I don't know. Um,
01:04:03
>> non-comics. >> You got some people in there. You know, >> dance.
01:04:08
>> Oh, wow. That's a good one. Yeah. Not inspired. >> I'M JAMIE CURTIS. I SAW YOU too much. We
01:04:13
do it too much. >> Jamie Lee Curtis. Should we text her? >> Why? Cuz you were in one of those yogurt
01:04:17
commercials with her. >> No, I did a movie. >> It's yogurt for your puss.
01:04:20
>> Moving with her. >> You think she got that to be like the mean stuff people say about me? I'm
01:04:25
going to do the [ __ ] yogurt commercial. >> Just go as far as you can. You're like,
01:04:29
I'm going to go all in then. Try to fight me on this. Yeah. >> No, he did a movie with it, right?
01:04:33
>> Yeah. >> Which Freakier Friday? No, it was called Borderlands. Nobody wanted
01:04:37
>> Borat. Borderlands. Oh, it's that director Eli Roth. Oh, no, never mind.
01:04:45
>> Yeah. >> Um >> Oh, he's good friends with uh Michael Bay.
01:04:50
>> MICHAEL. >> MICHAEL BAY. >> YEAH. YEAH. YEAH. >> WHAT?
01:04:55
>> YEAH. >> Oh my god. Tell Can you say my boy uh Adam says ambulance was fire? Yeah.
01:05:00
>> I like that movie. >> Yeah. It's It's like what would happen
01:05:03
if Michael Bay had drones? Finally, HE HAS DRONES. THANK GOD HE HAS DRONES NOW. >> YEAH. YEAH.
01:05:10
>> Oh my god, I love Michael Bay. >> Text Michael Bay that Adam's here.
01:05:14
>> Yeah. >> Yeah. Just actually just say Adam's here. Just Adam. Yeah.
01:05:17
>> It says what up? >> That's you. That's it. You have No. No
01:05:20
one. >> I don't really have anybody on my phone. >> Let me Can I throw some names out?
01:05:24
>> Yeah. >> Beyond Beyond Baitman. >> No. >> You don't have Baitman's number?
01:05:28
>> No. >> Okay. Charlie Day. >> No. >> It's all DMs. Really?
01:05:36
>> All DM. >> So you send your [ __ ] out all to all these guys? >> Just the Just to the dogs. Yeah,
01:05:41
>> just to the dogs. Yeah. During co me and my friends got addicted to that.
01:05:45
>> Send your dick to the dogs. >> Just Yeah. In the boys chat like my
01:05:48
friend just, you know, middle of the lockdown just send his penis. And I was And he was like, "Yeah, it's he said the
01:05:54
rule was it's gay to send it to girls, but it's cool if you're sending it to
01:05:57
your friends." >> And then I said I I eventually played the game >> and then uh and then uh he's like,
01:06:04
"You're puffed." And I'm like, "Dude, no, I'm not puffed." And then he said it
01:06:07
to my girlfriend to be like, "Is this puffed or is this real?" >> You were puffed, though, weren't you?
01:06:12
>> I was puffed. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> We know when someone's puffed, dude.
01:06:15
>> I wasn't puffed. >> Well, you know what? Hey, you know what? Also, post stroke. Post stroke though.
01:06:19
Does that doesn't count as puff? >> After you have a stroke, >> poststroke. Post come.
01:06:24
>> Oh, I don't know why I thought it was like a like >> No, because after you nut you're on the
01:06:28
come down. So, can you send a come down photo? >> Well, that's that's puffed.
01:06:32
>> No, because puff is on the way up. I think that is the de deflation. The
01:06:35
deeppuff is uh >> that's not on you. That's >> how fast do you deflate
01:06:39
>> post? >> Yeah. How how fast do you deflate? >> The point is I wanted it to look
01:06:43
beautiful for my friend. >> Yeah, we got it. >> But I mean, >> how quickly
01:06:47
>> how quickly after you nut does it deflate? >> It depends on how quick my wife is
01:06:51
coming upstairs. >> I'm barely hard at this point. >> Yeah. Yeah.
01:06:54
>> A noodle. >> Yeah. >> I don't know. It's pretty fast for me. I
01:06:57
can get it. >> Three minutes. >> Full minutes. >> Yeah. 3 minutes for me. Three minutes of
01:07:01
deflation. Yeah. >> What are you 13 years old? >> Yeah. >> What are you the healthiest man in the
01:07:05
world? >> No, I use Bluetooth. >> Oh, shout out to Oh, they don't do us
01:07:10
anymore. >> They don't? >> No, they did they did Cometown for a very long time. Yeah. Yeah, we used to
01:07:15
do make uh irresponsible claims. >> Are you doing shows in town or No, >> no, I was just in Seattle uh for the
01:07:25
doing a weekend and now I'm meeting with some of the most powerful executives in
01:07:29
in the >> Wait, what clubs up there? Uh there's a new one. Uh Emerald City.
01:07:36
>> Have you done up there? >> Seattle. Last time I did it was a club
01:07:40
that closed years ago. >> Parlor Live. I used to play. >> Yeah. Parlor.
01:07:43
>> Yeah. Yeah. I play there every year. >> But that's closed forever.
01:07:45
>> Yeah. >> This is new. Emerald City. >> Yeah. It was like It was like nice. It
01:07:49
was Yeah. It was my first weekend after a year cuz I I took the year off the road uh to get the talk show up and
01:07:55
running and uh so yeah, so it was like my first weekend back out. It was so It's It's actually like uh Yeah. You
01:08:02
know when you're doing stand up all the time, you hate it. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. It It really uh I feel like
01:08:07
a young kid again. I feel like a brideeyed kid again. >> Wow. >> Do you bring someone with you?
01:08:12
>> Yeah. I brought my boy Caleb um out on the road and he has to do anything I
01:08:16
say. >> Hell yeah. >> No. No. Uh yeah, I brought my friend Caleb who also works on the talk show
01:08:20
with me. He's a writer on the talk show >> and uh Yeah. No, it was like it was
01:08:24
funny remembering how to do an hour. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> And then like Yeah. And then you get it
01:08:29
back down and you're like, "Oh, actually this is a blast again." >> Yeah. And then uh whatever. Cut all
01:08:35
that. >> Jesus Christ. >> Last night I was at the store. I was about to go up and I just left.
01:08:43
>> Gson's g I just looked on stage. I was like, I don't want to do it.
01:08:50
>> Why? >> I It was the first time I was ever like that where I was like, I'm not going to
01:08:53
do it. >> Are you over it cuz the hour's done? >> Yeah. I just looked at cuz Sebastian was
01:08:56
up there killing and I was just kind of like I'm going to go home. >> You ever suck on a dick?
01:09:02
>> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Just for fun. >> Who did Who he killed a woman on stage?
01:09:09
>> It would be funny. >> Let me say you have anxiety. What's going on here?
01:09:12
>> No, I'm a I'm a I'm a fidgety guy. >> Yeah, >> you mentioned man.
01:09:23
>> Adam, do you take anything? Uh, do I take anything? Yeah. Uh, depression.
01:09:28
Jenum. Yeah. >> Jenhoff. >> Crocodile deal. Yeah. >> No, I don't take anything.
01:09:34
>> I just got on Lexopro. >> I'm not a whackad. >> Yeah. Yeah.
01:09:37
>> Have you ever taken anything? >> [ __ ] >> Yeah. A lot of [ __ ] when I was in
01:09:41
college. >> I tried to do uh >> Oh, man. One of the anti-depressants. I
01:09:48
don't know which one I did. >> Zoloft. >> Yeah, one of those. >> But your your penis doesn't work, right?
01:09:53
No, mine still did. >> Oh, nice, brother. >> Yeah, mine still did. It wasn't that. I
01:09:57
felt uh >> like a woman. >> I'm depressed. >> I'm sad about the world.
01:10:03
>> I mean, you're supposed Isn't everyone depressed? >> Yeah. Sad that you die, right?
01:10:08
>> What? >> I mean, I feel like depressed is like everyone you should everyone should be
01:10:14
depressed, right? >> Yeah. >> Varying levels. Yeah. All the time, though.
01:10:19
>> I mean, it's Yeah. If you're going to die one day, so that's really sad. Yeah.
01:10:23
>> Yeah. You don't get to be alive after that. >> Yeah. I'm on the fence about it. I just
01:10:26
like I am depressed, but it's like I mean, don't you That's I think that's
01:10:29
what drives >> Yeah. This thing about That's the thing about LA comedy. They [ __ ] talk like
01:10:34
there's like women to each other. Not like in New York. Not like in New York.
01:10:40
>> You got all those kings of comedy out there busting down the walls of these
01:10:44
sensitive guys. >> I I rewatched the King special in Seattle this weekend. It was my favorite
01:10:50
comedy special as a kid. >> Oh, Kings of Comedy. Yeah, it's so good. >> Yeah,
01:10:53
>> it's so funny. >> It's so good. >> The [ __ ] Titanic bit is I think it's
01:10:58
the funniest stand up bit of all time. >> Remember that one? The Steve the Steve
01:11:02
Titanic bit. >> Uhuh. >> Oh my god. He's unbelievable. What a genius.
01:11:06
>> Give it. >> He did it. Well, it's the same that same joke about if black people, you know.
01:11:11
Yeah. >> But do it in his tone. >> He said, "I hated that dry ass long ass movie."
01:11:18
And he's like, uh, something about the little boy that KILLED AT K DROWN THESE
01:11:24
[ __ ] you know. Yeah. So, he establishes that he doesn't like the movie Titanic. Yeah.
01:11:28
>> And then he says, uh, uh, you know what? Uh, you never hear about 3,000 black
01:11:34
people dying at the same time, which is like, you know, that's a joke. We've,
01:11:38
you know, like, uh, it wouldn't have been like that it had it been black people. And he's like, you saw that
01:11:43
movie? The band kept playing as the ship went down. And he's like, "WHAT KIND OF
01:11:48
BLACK band keeps playing cooling?" The gang would have been >> That's funny.
01:11:54
>> Funny. >> And then and then uh and then he talks about how he does this act out which is
01:12:01
this really takes it to the next stratosphere where he has this tiny little side table and he turns it over
01:12:08
and uh he's like, "I would have been turning over the damn table." And uh and
01:12:12
then there's a dinner napkin on top and he's like opening up a dinner napkin and
01:12:17
then he does this thing where he's blowing on the dinner like like a sail and he's kicking people.
01:12:22
>> Thank you, Robert. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Are you Robert? >> Yeah.
01:12:25
>> Robert Lee. >> Yeah. Call me whatever you want. >> Okay. I like Robert Lee. It's It makes
01:12:30
you in instantly like a Yeah. Like a maestro. Robert Lee. >> A general. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
01:12:37
>> You have the same name as a as a general. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Wow. Yeah.
01:12:41
>> Well, your middle name is uh >> Young Lee. >> Yeah. >> With an E.
01:12:45
>> Why? With a Y. >> Young Lean. >> You have the best name of all time.
01:12:50
>> Young Lean. >> Wow. >> That song was so good. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love Yeah, I love
01:12:56
music. >> Don't you love Young You love Young Lean? >> I think he's he's really cool. Yeah,
01:13:01
>> this kid that this kid's great. [ __ ] come and go, bro. >> Yeah. Uh Yeah. This is You know that?
01:13:08
Uh, Robert, >> he doesn't know that. >> You don't know. >> That's a reference that is not going to
01:13:12
go near him. >> What kind of music do you listen to? Karaoke. >> Oh, that Come on, dude.
01:13:17
>> That's good. >> Stop it. >> Yeah. Yeah. Why? >> What?
01:13:20
>> I like it. >> I like it seeing someone pouring their heart out. >> But no, I'm more like, you know, I've
01:13:25
always been more into like, you know, alty kind of stuff, you know? >> That's not true.
01:13:30
>> No. What do you mean? >> You like commercial [ __ ] >> Like Coldplay.
01:13:34
>> Sure. I love Coldplay. >> Yeah. First two albums pretty good. >> Yeah. Yeah. You like commercial [ __ ]
01:13:38
too? You like all of it? >> I like all of it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> I love I love Coldplay.
01:13:42
>> Yeah. >> Yeah. You have his number? >> No, I don't. >> Okay.
01:13:46
>> Um I like um bands like the Pixies and stuff like that. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Bugazi. I like
01:13:52
>> Cool. >> Sonic Youth. >> And And what's And what's Andrew more
01:13:55
into? >> You know, he's into everything. >> Like he is a true >> He likes everything.
01:14:01
>> Hip-hop historian. >> I love hip-hop. You are. >> Yeah. He knows a little bit of
01:14:05
everything. Big big wig. Big wigger as a kid. >> Yeah. Yeah, me too. >> You're a jazz guy.
01:14:10
>> I like soul. >> I like I told Jay to kiss uh when he came on the show.
01:14:15
>> I came out of the closet. I was like, I feel bad, but I we used to me and Jewish
01:14:18
guys used to we'll lock the door and put on Mitchell and Ness and just pretend to
01:14:22
be like you. And he was like that. He He thought it was cool. He He I had to come
01:14:28
clean. >> Yeah. Why Why would you think he wouldn't like it though? >> Uh I mean it's embarrassing. So what?
01:14:32
>> Yeah. Yeah. He'd be like, "Yeah, you're [ __ ] I I don't know. I have found out
01:14:37
from the from the talk show that rappers have gotten along with rappers and it it
01:14:41
has made me feel >> they love comedy. A lot of them do. >> It's a dream. I mean, it's like it's
01:14:46
like a bar mitzvah or something to find the the approval of a rapper. >> Huge. Yeah. I had G Herbo on the show
01:14:51
>> on your show. >> Yeah. Yeah. And we got along famously and it was like uh
01:14:56
>> I was like, >> it's incredible. >> It's incredible. I mean, he's probably
01:14:59
killed like three maybe. >> But three is not that bad. >> Three is not a lot. Five. Five and up.
01:15:04
grew up in like [ __ ] literally Blackhawk Down. I mean like southside of Chicago was like
01:15:09
>> toughest part of the world. >> Yeah. >> Is this still tough?
01:15:12
>> I mean Yeah. >> What happens? I mean why is it so tough? >> What happened?
01:15:23
>> What happened? >> 13-year-olds have guns. >> Oh, they do? Yeah.
01:15:26
>> Yeah. Kids have guns. >> It's like legal, correct me if I'm
01:15:29
wrong. It's legal under a certain line of demarcation for uh like if you're
01:15:34
you're black if you kill another black person basically. But like North if you
01:15:38
like uh >> well the cops aren't going to stop anything. No one no one's going to break
01:15:42
anything up. >> They I mean it they should probably right. >> No. >> No.
01:15:46
>> No. You got to let it go. >> Do you have Lori Lightfoot's number?
01:15:49
>> Yeah. You want to call her? >> I'm trying to >> You trying to [ __ ] [ __ ]
01:15:54
>> You have her number? Who's that? >> [ __ ] no. Lori Lightfoot.
01:15:56
>> Yeah. She's they uh didn't Trump call her Mayor Crackhead. >> Mayor Crackhead. Yeah.
01:16:00
>> Yeah. That wasn't very nice. >> Chicago's homicide rate per capita
01:16:02
significantly higher than New York City and Los Angeles. Philadelphia being the closest. Not St. You still not us Philly
01:16:07
>> cuz when I'm in Shamberg I don't I don't feel it. >> Not that's not where we're That's not
01:16:12
That's not it. >> Yeah. Yeah. No, it's crazy there. >> I just see many malls and
01:16:15
>> Yeah, that's all the malls. >> Rosemont to >> No one's going to get clipped out there.
01:16:20
>> Improv. I play the improv. Yeah. Shamberg. Yeah. So if from the Shamberg
01:16:23
improv, how far do I have to go? Do it's north south side. >> It's southeast from there.
01:16:28
>> And it's Shamberg north of Chicago. >> Shamberg is northwest of Chicago.
01:16:31
>> Northwest. Right. So, how far would I have to drive down to get the south?
01:16:35
>> Like an hour to get to where you want >> where I want to go. Yeah. Yeah.
01:16:37
>> You No, you don't want to go. >> Yeah. But if I step out of the car, if I
01:16:39
go, "Hello, what would happen?" >> They probably They go, "That's a Bob,
01:16:43
not Mad TV, motherfucker." >> Mad TV. Mad TV. Mad TV. You'd be good.
01:16:46
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'd be good. You would? >> Yeah. Yeah. If I go, "Hello."
01:16:49
>> Then I'd step out and they go, "That's a [ __ ] that went that dude on Mad
01:16:52
TV." >> Be like, "Oh, it's Miss Swan is here. Yeah. >> Go miss one.
01:16:56
>> Oh, it's the Miss Swan. Yeah. Yeah. No, they're like, "Oh, he was on." And just
01:17:00
like that, he did the podcast with Carrie. >> He was fabulous. >> Carrie and Jay Diaz.
01:17:08
>> I love I watched the whole thing. >> I had no idea what was going on on that
01:17:11
show. >> Wait, you I never read it. I just didn't know. >> Wait, you weren't a fan?
01:17:15
>> I had no idea about what it was. Why? >> Cuz I put in the work. I know all about
01:17:20
it. I know. They called I knew. I mean, I was called. Have you seen Sex in the City?
01:17:24
>> Culturally, I know what it is. >> You culturally? >> Yeah. Yeah.
01:17:28
>> Yeah. But um >> No, you look great. >> That shirt's cool.
01:17:30
>> Did you bring your own war shirt? >> They made me wear that. >> And this is what people like you wear,
01:17:37
right? >> It's like a paparazzi style. >> It is. >> That looks like you guys are just out in
01:17:41
LA. The stars are just like us. >> Yeah. >> And just like that. >> And just like that, the stars are like
01:17:46
us. >> She was very nice. I I uh >> She's so kind. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah,
01:17:50
>> I I had her on my show and uh and a gay fella told me that I showed her in a
01:17:55
light that no one has. >> And if if a gay person says that, they know this [ __ ]
01:18:00
>> Wow. >> Yeah, they know this type of [ __ ] >> What kind of light did you show her in?
01:18:03
>> I as like a her personality in like a just Yeah. In a genuine way. I tried to
01:18:08
do that on the show. So, it's like a kind of a sweet. It was a really nice I
01:18:12
mean, if a if a a sodomite, a homosexual, if a butt pirate says that to you, what happened to butt pirate?
01:18:20
Butt pirate. That's an insane butt pirate. >> But, you know, it was surprisingly like
01:18:26
she was surprisingly kind of down to earth and >> Yeah. >> The experience wasn't like because my my
01:18:32
fear is, oh my god, you know what I mean? Because if she was rude, >> then I'd be like, I don't want to do
01:18:37
this. Yeah. You know what I mean? But it's just like she was pretty cool, you
01:18:41
know? So, >> yeah. Yeah. Did you rip ass on set? >> Did you ever rip ass around any
01:18:50
>> What? I asked her. Yeah, we did a thing where we asked her um I did like fake
01:18:56
questions from like friends and I got Caleb to leave one of the voicemails and he's like, "Hey, like um I just want to
01:19:02
address the elephant in the room. Like was there ever a time where like Charlotte or Miranda or you just like
01:19:08
farted like really disgustingly like >> while you're making the show and like
01:19:12
who's your favorite character boyfriend? >> And she was like she was like I think
01:19:16
that's the one that pushed it a little too far. >> Really? >> She's very proper. Yeah.
01:19:20
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> She's like a reader. >> Did she ever tell you about that?
01:19:24
>> No. >> No. Well, >> she likes to read books. >> You didn't chat with
01:19:26
>> Yeah. >> What? >> You never chat with >> Oh, no. This was You were like sitting.
01:19:30
She's like reading something. You know, I'm I'm playing a Candy Crush.
01:19:33
>> Really? You didn't You didn't vibe out. >> Well, we go Good morning.
01:19:37
>> Good morning. >> Is that something? Yeah. Yeah. >> Really? >> Yeah.
01:19:41
>> Oh, you're not making her sound good, though. >> Yeah. Yeah. No, I would say and
01:19:44
>> No, she'd be reading. He'd >> be reading. She's like, "How was your Do
01:19:47
you sleep well?" >> I go, >> she asked about your sleep. >> Good morning.
01:19:50
>> You know, and that kind of >> good morning is nice. Yeah, that's a
01:19:53
nice thing to say. >> She'll go, "Have you ever been up to Sedona or something?"
01:19:57
>> She said that. >> Yeah. Yeah. I'm like, "No, I've never
01:20:00
been there." I just think it's really nice this time of year. >> Did you get Jade on your show from a guy
01:20:04
named Vinnie? >> Vinnie? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, he told me he knows you. >> One of my good friends.
01:20:08
>> V. Yeah. >> Have you seen his tattoo on his butt? >> I've seen it all.
01:20:12
>> That tattoo is the He's the one of one tattoo. >> He's the man.
01:20:16
>> You met him. You met Venar Fuso. You met him on his ass. He has the Dallas
01:20:20
Cowboys star next to a Palestinian flag. >> Yeah. >> What is that? That is not the same
01:20:26
tattoo. >> Okay. [ __ ] The combination of those two things is uh unbelievable.
01:20:32
>> Well, Jerry Jones is Palestinian. That's why he got >> Yeah. Yeah. He was a Yeah, he was in the
01:20:37
uh PFLP for a while. >> I bet mine would look like a Dallas Cowboy star, but I can't
01:20:42
>> No, it's just a star, but it covered up a what? A name? What was it?
01:20:45
>> It was a butterfly. >> Butterfly. That's right. >> What? So, you were like, I'm embarrassed
01:20:49
to have a butterfly. Somebody >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> I was When I was drinking, I had a
01:20:53
butterfly tattoo there. >> Okay. >> I was drunk and then I was embarrassed.
01:20:56
I put a star on top of that. >> That's a good story. >> Wait, >> you have tattoos or no?
01:21:02
>> No. I have no respect for any tattoo I've ever seen ever. >> It's like street art. Am I going to look
01:21:07
at a graffiti and be like, "Wow, >> no. No. I mean, >> you don't have No,
01:21:13
>> I don't. That's It's Why would I do that?" >> Yeah.
01:21:16
>> It's ridiculous to get that for forever. >> Silly. >> Silly.
01:21:20
>> Forever. He's got them all over. >> Wow. Well, I like the Mad TV tattoo.
01:21:25
Man, >> you like you've actually earned that one, too. >> Yeah. Comedy store.
01:21:28
>> How many seasons were you Mad TV? >> Eight year. Seven. Eight years.
01:21:32
>> Oh my god. You're the cool. That That is so cool. >> Yeah, I was on it.
01:21:35
>> It was so cool back then. >> It was so funny. >> Yeah, >> it was it was just I
01:21:40
>> I used to watch it rel I prefer this >> SNL. >> No, this >> Oh, sorry.
01:21:46
>> Hanging out with you like this thing. >> This kind of thing. >> YEAH. THERE'S NO NOTES. THERE'S NO
01:21:50
SOMEBODY SAYING, YOU KNOW, I mean, you can't do that. >> Well, these are the conversations that
01:21:54
comics have. Yeah. Yeah. >> When no one's watching. >> Yeah. Exactly. There's no like, uh, oh,
01:21:58
you're 20 minutes late. What the [ __ ] You know what I mean? >> They said that on Mad TV to you.
01:22:02
>> Yeah. You would get in trouble if you were like an hour late or whatever.
01:22:04
>> Really? >> Yeah. Yeah. >> How did Arty survive? >> I wasn't on with him, but you know, I
01:22:08
mean, he barely survived. Yeah. Yeah. >> The story he tells about the pig thing
01:22:12
is the funniest. >> Crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> You never did anything with him?
01:22:16
>> No, I never met him. I mean, I know him now, but like >> back then you did no crossover.
01:22:20
>> No crossover. No. >> Wow. I crossovered with uh Alex Borstein who did Miss Swan. You know what I mean?
01:22:26
>> Yeah. Oh, I thought Oh, never mind. I thought that was >> Were you like, "Hey, this is what the
01:22:34
hell is this?" >> Oh, no. >> No, you came up with that. >> No, I didn't come up with a knot.
01:22:37
>> But if someone was doing a character on Matt TV with me like Heshi Tesher was
01:22:40
the pedophile. >> I would be like a little bit like you're a black guy. Why are you doing
01:22:45
>> For me it's comedy. There's no bounds. >> There's no bounds.
01:22:47
>> She's also there's no bounds. >> She's so good at it.
01:22:49
>> She's so good at it. >> She's so good. My friend actually his
01:22:52
his mom was a dentist. She did uh Alex Borisstein's teeth or no no uh no he no
01:22:58
he wrote a letter to Matt TV and uh and uh he said he loved the Miss Swan character and uh she sent back a a a
01:23:07
what do you call it? Headshot and it said Phil you look like a man. And then she signed it and and yeah and he had it
01:23:13
next to a Stone Cold thing cuz his mom did Stone Cold's teeth. >> Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Yeah. You look like
01:23:20
He look like a man. >> Phil, you look alike a man. That's so funny. Who wrote that?
01:23:24
>> She did. >> Really? She came up with that >> with the character. Yeah.
01:23:28
>> You know that she said to me when I got on the show? She pulled me aside. She
01:23:31
goes, >> "Get off the show as quickly as you can." >> She said that to you
01:23:35
>> because I hate it here. >> Oh, I thought she was like, I I don't
01:23:37
want to see your celestial ass around. >> Listen, you [ __ ] How long was she on?
01:23:43
>> Three or four years. >> She's lowest. No. >> Yes. >> Yeah.
01:23:45
>> Wow. She's the She's the best lady of all time. >> The best. Oh my god. You have her
01:23:50
number? >> No. >> Um, why didn't you get her number? >> I There's some cast members where I just
01:23:55
never clicked with. >> She was one of them. >> She was one of them. Yeah. Do you play
01:23:59
clubs here when you're in town or No. >> No. No. No. >> Come to the store. Why don't you come
01:24:03
tonight? >> Are you there tonight? >> Are you there tonight? >> No, I'm out. Valhalla, you mean?
01:24:07
>> I'm there tonight. >> When are you there? >> Really? >> Next week? Monday.
01:24:10
>> Oh, you're going to do Monday. That Monday? >> Yeah. You have Jay's number?
01:24:15
>> No. >> Oh, yeah. >> You have Jay's number. >> He's upstairs.
01:24:18
What? J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J J Jason J Jason,
01:24:20
>> I love him so much. >> He comes to the store now more. I don't
01:24:23
know why he's been coming a lot, but he has. >> He's amazing. >> Everyone says that thing about the late
01:24:29
>> but the late '7s they say everyone was like that was the best comic I've ever
01:24:32
seen. >> Well, you know, and then the store was the divide between him and Letterman. It
01:24:36
was either you were his side or his side. >> Well, yeah. And then the he crossed the
01:24:39
picket line during the strike. How pathetic is that striking >> from what? From [ __ ] How pathetic.
01:24:45
We're going to start a union. What is this? [ __ ] lay miser rob. >> Yeah, but the
01:24:49
>> Yeah, but they never got paid anything and the store was getting all the money.
01:24:53
I mean I mean >> Jay like Jay like crossed the picket line in a [ __ ] like a clown car or
01:24:58
something >> and then Mity gave him a drink ticket. >> Yeah. >> Like you know so much about that.
01:25:04
>> Me? >> Yeah, I was there dude. I was there brother. >> Oh my god. You should have seen it man.
01:25:09
You should have seen that was the good >> I think you're like Andrew in that way
01:25:12
that you guys know tidbits of something like a lot. >> But it's about comedy dude
01:25:15
>> that specifically. Everybody knows those stories, but that's that's also why like
01:25:18
young people divided on who they liked more was Letterman or Leno. >> That but I I hated that that uh uh I
01:25:25
hated that. I liked all of them. >> Yeah. But it became this kind of thing
01:25:28
is like Eagles or Rolling Stones. Yeah. Yeah. It's [ __ ] I mean I like Conan
01:25:34
as a kid cuz he was silly. It love Conan. >> Yeah. It was like a sloppy fun show.
01:25:38
>> But I loved Jay just just finding make there. Come on. They're friends.
01:25:48
I'm friends with it. They're a friend. Yeah. Just fighting dumb asses and
01:25:52
asking them one plus one. >> It's so fun. >> Oh, Adam, you want to plug anything?
01:25:58
>> Uh, the Adam Fre show. Do girls come to your guys uh shows? >> It's all guys. Insurrectionist.
01:26:03
>> It's all guys. >> It's all insurrectionist. >> We're doing it at the capital next year.
01:26:07
>> Actually, because of the talk show, there's like more now. There's uh
01:26:10
there's like Yeah. Like parents. >> I would say we get a a lot of couples.
01:26:14
>> We get couples. A lot of hostages. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> No, actually girls like this show.
01:26:20
>> Well, you guys are more sex symbol kind of style. >> Thank you. >> For me, I I command uh Yeah. I just
01:26:26
loer. No. No. I love the boys. Shout out to the You're the craziest. It's like
01:26:30
they let out the insane asylum. >> Or Adam, look in the camera and go, um,
01:26:35
what? >> Thank you for being a bad friend. I mean, that's how we close a show.
01:26:38
>> All right. Thank you for being a bad friend. >> Yeah, that's good. That's sucks. Why did
01:26:41
you guys do that? You make the guest do that's fine. Woo! Woo! Yeah! Woo!

Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

  • 70
    Funniest
  • 60
    Most quotable
  • 60
    Best performance

Episode Highlights

  • Shaky Diseases
    A lighthearted discussion about diseases leads to a quirky desire for a time machine.
    “I want to get a shaky disease and then have a time machine.”
    @ 01m 17s
    February 09, 2026
  • Hippo Facts
    An interesting fact about hippos secreting a pink residue is revealed.
    “There is a pink residue that comes out of their skin.”
    @ 07m 06s
    February 09, 2026
  • Chicago's Comedy Community
    A light-hearted discussion about the supportive nature of Chicago comedians.
    “You Chicago guys help each other.”
    @ 14m 54s
    February 09, 2026
  • The Curse of the Lottery
    Discussing how winning the lottery can lead to severe consequences and unhappiness.
    “The lottery is the worst thing they say.”
    @ 18m 51s
    February 09, 2026
  • Unexpected Recognition
    Bobby Lee shares his experience of being recognized at a gay bar.
    “Wow, wow, wow, wow.”
    @ 27m 45s
    February 09, 2026
  • Healthy Meals on the Go
    Factor offers quick, healthy meals that are ready in minutes, perfect for busy lifestyles.
    “You need a good meal that's delicious and healthy.”
    @ 57m 56s
    February 09, 2026
  • Meeting Obama
    A humorous exchange about meeting former President Obama and the pressures he faces.
    “Can you imagine what it's like to be Obama?”
    @ 01h 00m 20s
    February 09, 2026
  • The Nature of Depression
    A candid discussion on depression and its universal nature among people.
    “Everyone should be depressed, right?”
    @ 01h 10m 15s
    February 09, 2026
  • Robert Lee's Name
    Robert Lee's name sparks a fun conversation about historical figures.
    “You have the best name of all time.”
    @ 01h 12m 48s
    February 09, 2026
  • Approval from a Rapper
    The joy of receiving validation from a rapper is discussed.
    “It's a dream. I mean, it's like a bar mitzvah or something to find the approval of a rapper.”
    @ 01h 14m 44s
    February 09, 2026
  • G Herbo's Past
    A surprising revelation about rapper G Herbo's life experiences.
    “It's incredible. I mean, he's probably killed like three maybe.”
    @ 01h 14m 59s
    February 09, 2026
  • The Insurrectionist Show
    A comedic take on audience demographics, revealing unexpected insights about show attendees.
    “It's all insurrectionist.”
    @ 01h 26m 03s
    February 09, 2026

Episode Quotes

  • How the [ __ ] do I know that? That's awesome.
    Bobby Falls in Love | Ep 307 | Bad Friends
  • The lottery is the worst thing they say.
    Bobby Falls in Love | Ep 307 | Bad Friends
  • Wow, wow, wow, wow.
    Bobby Falls in Love | Ep 307 | Bad Friends
  • It's never frozen. It's ready in about 2 minutes.
    Bobby Falls in Love | Ep 307 | Bad Friends
  • Can you imagine what it's like to be Obama?
    Bobby Falls in Love | Ep 307 | Bad Friends
  • If a sodomite, a homosexual, if a butt pirate says that to you...
    Bobby Falls in Love | Ep 307 | Bad Friends

Key Moments

  • Chicago Support14:54
  • Celebrity Origins15:42
  • Dinner with Robin Wright16:25
  • Gay Bar Recognition27:45
  • Music Preferences1:13:14
  • Tattoo Stories1:20:51
  • Friendship Banter1:25:44
  • Audience Insights1:26:01

Tension Over Time

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown