00:00:00
merch we got merch and check this hat out I've been wearing on stage have you seen me look at this dude look at this shirt this is the OG shirt the OG OG
00:00:07
design is back Y and also bad friends on the back in the back the cute little faces on the front bad friends on the
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back go to badf friends merch.com we also have coffee mugs for people that like coffee and beautiful beanies and
00:00:17
and a couple different colors but go get some OG merch we're releasing new stuff as we go Bob and I are in a competition to see who can design the best shirt but
00:00:24
for now you want the OG original stuff happy Holidays happy holidays get this for someone that you love go to badri merch.com badf friends merch.com you two
00:00:32
are bad friends who are these two idiots a white dude and an Asian dude you two are disgusting you two are something we're bad friends we walked in the studio here
00:00:45
we go we did a couple spots Bob and I did a back toback spot at the store and uh then we walked in the studio and mcon
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tried to make up for all his blunders by getting Bobby in and out that's very nice but what did you forget what you
00:00:57
forget M fries yeah french fries the quintessential pairing the quintessential pairings the
00:01:03
quintessential prings I guess yeah a burger and fries peanut butter and jelly right yeah yeah what don't you understand about that I don't think I've ever gotten a
00:01:16
cheeseburger without fries Freddy AIDS Freddy Mercury Freddy Mercury and AIDS these two things go hand in hand Magic Johnson AIDS yeah yeah Easy E AIDS next time I'm
00:01:30
in an In-N-Out I'll think about Easy E Anda I'm sorry next time you're in the order and they say welcome to In-N-Out how can I help you what would you like
00:01:37
some mates welcome in and out how can I help you what would you like a double double
00:01:45
with regular onions and fries and a coke diet coke please okay a double double with eights coming right up window two see they'll know they'll know they'll automatically know and I'm not I'm not making fun of
00:01:57
people with that disease it's terrible no we're saying the two things that go together yeah they do come to go together it's terrible
00:02:03
disease well a burger was a very nice gesture thank you but a burger without fries seems worthless to me but did you see what I did mm you call me you I'm
00:02:16
just leaving the store I said I was at 7-Eleven you go get me some snacks get me some snacks well I said please what'
00:02:21
I do though you got me seven different things to choose from see that's how you do it that's what friendship is that's what love is that's what family is and
00:02:28
you don't do that you don't complete it yeah like when I play a video game I need to complete all the objectives yeah
00:02:34
you know what I mean and here's another thing hi guy hi guy me yeah you're ripped you're ripped the sh out of your mind St I told you it's later in the evening I'm going to start drug testing
00:02:46
on the show the employees on the show are going to go into rigorous drug test I'm I'm not K you're so high right now I'm not so high I'm I've seen your eyes
00:02:53
get on Amazon right now in order drug tests for the crew cuz I want to start drug testing everybody yeah this is a sober show Bobby is so he's going
00:03:00
through the program show up here on drugs and alcohol Ming whenever I look at you I get uncomfortable he's itching
00:03:07
he's itching right now I want marijuana too no Bob he's given me marijuana before yeah because we get him for free at comedy shows he gives what we get when Hawaii was I high yeah when I was
00:03:20
high yeah when you were relapsing yeah that doesn't count we were in Hawaii together yeah bro yeah he was wait wait
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wait why we did a show no we didn't do a show in Hawaii no what you mean Mexico no I was in Hawaii with him with trash Tuesday oh oh you were yeah and you were filming something and so you were there
00:03:40
too and yeah it was chaos but do we get high together oh yeah fun yeah it was no
00:03:46
hey hey no yes bad Carlos bring me back to no no I won't I won't Andrew will get
00:03:53
too mad and these drug tests are pretty uh reasonably priced too yeah well I want the whole crew drug tested and
00:03:58
fancy I want you to drug test as well you're not exempt from this because I don't know what you're up to if you're using he seems like he could be
00:04:04
using and Carlos meanwhile what what did Mone say you were drinking in the car before you came in the too Chico
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Margaritas are good Mone go get a Bud Light out of the fridge he has to drink one on the air now hell yeah don't drink
00:04:17
that on camera okay you pig just do that like the sad Pig you are hide it behind the wall it's the gay drink right it's
00:04:24
well trans Dr Trans drink yeah the Bud Light supports trans rice I ask you a question Andrew my best friend yeah baby
00:04:30
um why is it that you can't mix Foods who are you talking about what do you mean what do you mean I can mix Foods no
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what no but think about what I'm saying you can't different lands right you can't at a restaurant get a California roll did you give him weed I promise I
00:04:48
beef stro off I'm trying to tap into it no you can do that it's at a buffet California rle beef strogen off at a buffet have you ever been to Buffet they have all that stuff they have pizza
00:04:59
spaghett a Baja Fish Taco go to any when we're in Vegas you can get all that at one we'll go to the famous you shouldn't
00:05:05
do it no yes you should why because that's what makes America great oh that's true that's what Donald Trump was
00:05:11
talking about right can you get a torch I want I I want a torch tiki torch I want a tiki torch and I want to be able
00:05:17
to like we not a red like a red hat but without any anything on it just a white hat no red hat like a r red baseball hat
00:05:24
thought talking about a white hat like a pointy white hat well I want that at night yeah with the torch yeah at night
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but during the day wear the red hat right mhm with nothing on it nothing on it and let them infer right I think you
00:05:38
can mix mix foods but honestly do you even like it what do you want to you want to get a California roll and then
00:05:43
have spaghetti yeah I mean i' have never had a California with beef stroganov before is this something that you want
00:05:49
well I just I in my mind I'm like there's no way that's good I don't know I kind of think that might be really
00:05:55
good but with the bajav fish taco too I mean what's wrong with it I just don't get it I just just don't see what's bad about this an
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epana again these are all home runs all right okay I don't hear any flaws in this okay what about this if I take a
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California roll got it I take a bowl and I stir it like you mash it I mash it got
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it then I put beast strogov in Stir It Right mhm steel cut oatmeal why Stir It what do you mean why why not is what I said why not I said I mean you're Irish right yeah yeah yeah oh is that our
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thing well I mean I put in California role you need you need cut up some potatoes put some potatoes in there you
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stir it right right and then what else would you put in there I think you have it
00:06:38
not you think so no I think you put an entire packet of American cheese that's right on top slices singles CRA the
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craft powder right the macaroni and cheese powder mac and cheese powder you pour
00:06:51
that in there right you mix it then you bake it yeah 350 in the oven right and you bake it for 2 hours that's so long 2 hours yeah all right or no hour what's
00:07:03
long I never Bak 30 minutes or 30 minutes Bing 400 can you put flow in there just a just like a
00:07:11
rose yeah yeah yeah you can yeah like a dandelion a Bonia a Bonia yeah you throw
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that in there no I put flour like the wheat flour the bread flour right why why could you make a
00:07:22
bread out of it not if you just put flour in it that's not going to do anything oh how do you make bread we need water let me guess water M flour
00:07:31
egg butter yeast yeast ye yeast ye Let It Rise yeah yeah we get we'll get Tom Papa on the show he'll teach us how to make bread oh really you know what I did in the middle of the night that I have to admit and I feel very bad about I
00:07:43
stepped on my dog going to piss in the middle of the night no you know that sound that they make when you step on it's different yeah it's different
00:07:50
there's a different sound that they emit it's like inside their computer deep inside of the algorithm and when you step on him it's like yeah they've never
00:07:57
made that sound before yeah I've stepped on Jewish a Jewish person before what do they say same same thing yeah yeah you
00:08:05
just stepped on one I stepped on one yeah wow o ve oh yeah that my Jewish dog o but so you stepped on your dog your dog's so cute he a poodle I feel so bad she was under see what happens is she
00:08:17
does this I don't know if your dog does this but she goes on and off the bed during the course of the night like sometimes if she's too warm she'll jump
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down off of the bed and then she sleeps onto the bench she gets cold she wants to come back up on the bed again well
00:08:28
last night she must have jumped off when before I passed out cuz I didn't know yeah and I my fat ass rolled out of bed
00:08:35
and I took a big thud onto the ground and I stepped on the back of her legs and her butt I mean hard and did wake
00:08:42
your wife up yeah freaked out well cuz the dog went it did that thing and did he walk out of the room no she panicked
00:08:49
she started moving around the room like crazy like she and I was trying to hold her to see if she was in pain and I picked her up and I was holding her and
00:08:55
I just started pee I went pissed I had to piss you pissed while you were holding the dog well I was comforting her but I had to piss what am I going to
00:09:00
do not piss I got to comfort the dog has your dog seen your penis seen it seen it how else did you adopt the dog that's how you let him know who you are oh
00:09:11
that's right I don't know peanut butter baby peanut butter oh yeah yeah yeah I was holding the poor girl and I'm peeing and she was like whimpering and shaking
00:09:18
I felt so bad so bad I know so we killed her we had to get rid of her that's it Bojo my cat my middle cat yeah no the
00:09:24
youngest cat Bo the youngest he's fat he's overweight I would fat fat a mean word he's over and you know sometimes I'll look at him and on my bed when he's on my bed he'll
00:09:36
go and like spread his legs like this he goes just to show you his Goods no he doesn't he wants belly rubs oh yeah bellies that's what we say but it's not he he wants his poito rubbed I don't
00:09:50
know I know dud poo touch I don't know but I swear to God he goes right like this right and okay Bojo and I'll start doing the belly and he'll go oh down he wants it down he'll go
00:10:05
right I'll go no no Bojo you know the next time you are on a date with a girl I want you to just at dinner just
00:10:10
go you think so yeah see what she'll do like this see if she'll rub in the middle of it right you and I are on a
00:10:16
date right now okay thank you for taking me to Cheesecake Factory this is rad I've never been here do have to match
00:10:22
you're welcome I like what that's not you I'm the lady I I know but your voice I just felt like I had to match it no
00:10:28
it's you oh you're welcome I like that you're just you okay I'm sorry I really like this restaurant this is great thanks for taking me here oh you're
00:10:34
welcome what who are you now me okay great that's how I am she's black right what are you're doing I'm black I thought the character was black I was doing my own thing oh you're right okay perfect you're welcome so um I know we
00:10:49
matched on Rya yeah and I want to tell you a lot of girls online they're not into first aid hookups yeah I am I'm a first first dat hookup type of girl
00:11:05
me meow oh wow no no me there it is that got me gone yeah yeah that got that would get me gone that's better yeah okay sorry my bad I want you to meow the next time you D take someone on a date just do that lift up your if it's not
00:11:17
going well if that's not going well well just let it bomb anyway what's the difference okay well I want to see what
00:11:22
the com okay let's say that we're having a conversation that's uncomfortable you know you know some the date's not going well and you go
00:11:30
and I and you kind of know oh this is not this I'm not going to hook up with this girl this is going to be bad you're ready to just bail yeah so let's all
00:11:37
right so we're middle conversation I know okay here it is yeah I don't know I just think I don't know I disagree with you I think I think reparations are in order and I think we should be giving
00:11:48
everybody money I think we should be giving every black individual in the United States money I don't know why you we'd have to give the natives money and
00:11:54
then we'd have to give everyone money and we should and we should give more and more and more the hard work taxpayers money they should all go to
00:12:01
Every minority no what about infrastructure what do we need that the roads the roads will what do we need that
00:12:07
for can we get out of here really see how fast that switched she was so politically charged until you finally
00:12:13
meow at her yeah that's all she needs wow I did not know that is a P that is a panty dropper panty dropper kiddo anyway
00:12:23
Bojo what did Bojo do you rubbed him no I rub his belly and then um every time I'll do a wider I'll do a wider rub you know what I mean like one of
00:12:35
those like you know wax on wax off you know Cate kid R little Miyagi stuff yeah so I go wide and it goes toward his area
00:12:44
right and he go he get a little bit more loves it yeah so I don't know man I know man what
00:12:51
do you know it's wrong I think you've trained him to do that no that's not true that's not true that's that's out of pocket it sounds like I did not it
00:12:59
sounds like you started it you started it he wouldn't know that if you didn't start it you did it one time he liked it you kept going back well P he's poo is
00:13:08
wait a cat's pee pee what are you doing what are you googling can you sexually arouse the cat
00:13:14
yeah male cats can be sensitive to testical stimulation oh sorry tactile yeah some finish off the arouser uh
00:13:21
reaction by biting or clawing does he bite you and Claw you when you're rubbing his belly why it's not really does he bite
00:13:27
you and Claw you your honor I will interview the way does he B bite you and Claw you your honor it's a nibble it's
00:13:33
not a bite but does he claw does his hands go down there and he bites and nibbles it's a high five yeah not a claw
00:13:39
the good work is what he's saying he's going thank you I'm telling you D this can get reported I didn't do anything
00:13:46
what is it the ASPCA or whatever I didn't do anything I didn't do anything straight well no no we can't say that word we can't say that word dude what
00:13:51
the [ __ ] are you doing dude Stoned on drug High zilia Zu oh [ __ ] you can't say
00:13:56
that can't say that either I'm sure no I'm just saying so anyway go back to your dog is your dog
00:14:02
okay well I'm certainly not going to pet her puss I didn't say that I didn't say
00:14:07
that that's exactly what you said I didn't say that you said you had a wide birth and then you accidentally rubbed on his p no I'm just going you know wax
00:14:13
on anyway okay no I would not I rub her belly and I stay and I stay high and up by her neck and her little belly yeah
00:14:20
but she's going to be fine we'll find out let me ask you this she's got trauma for sure can I ask you this though what if like The Little Prince Right the lp I
00:14:28
had a little wand yeah and I did your dog turned into a human she's female right she's a girl yeah she looked like Margo Robbie mhm right so I go like you
00:14:39
know the Little Prince don't they do that little frog turning into the prince yeah they do I turn your dog into Margot Robbie yeah amazing right
00:14:46
yeah you're going to raise her as your nothing would change I would put I'd make her get on all fource I'd put on a leash on her and I'd walk her around I'd
00:14:52
take her for walks in the morning really yeah well she's my dog and you wouldn't do belly rubs like absolutely you
00:14:58
wouldn't do long belly rub I would do belly rub the long kind I don't know what do you mean I would take her for long walks I would clean up her poop but you know be weird though they
00:15:09
probably don't know English they probably still a dog right so you still you know no dogs know English dogs know
00:15:15
the language in which you speak to them you go to Mexico they speak Spanish oh really what's a Mexican dog sound like
00:15:21
hey bark [Laughter] bark you know what you're right bow B hey man bow yeah what do they what do
00:15:33
they sound like in China help help help that's me oh cut it out why what does a dog sound like in China oh wow no no no that's that's first of all that's Japanese all right
00:15:47
CH [ __ ] okay you can't say that why can't do that CH [ __ ] yeah yeah you're saying Chin Chin I saying Chinchin yeah good restaurant by right you like Chin Chin love I love Chinchin Chin Chin is
00:15:58
is a clean restaurant the food is so clean Chinchin is like the McDonald's of of Chinese food like it's consistent it
00:16:05
always has the same thing you know what you're getting it's the old school it's the simple menu right and it used to be
00:16:10
when we were broke that used to be the place we're like oh man two weeks I get to go to chinen well that was like
00:16:16
high-end that was super that was like a fancy yeah if I if I could go to Chinchin on Sunset that was a fancy Chinese night out yeah what's a fancy
00:16:23
night out for you Mone right now now that you're making a couple bucks we've got you hired are you are you treating
00:16:29
yourself uh I went to Barney's the other night the bar Barney's Beanery yeah not
00:16:34
the department store yeah he can't do that I I don't know the one on Santa Monica yeah the one on Santa Monica you
00:16:40
want to know the irony about that place I've been going to that place for years I used to love going there me too Barney is in the heart of West Hollywood for
00:16:46
people that don't know West Hollywood is the predominant gay neighborhood in Los Angeles it is the mecca of gay it's where the gay parade is Right Barney in
00:16:54
its origination was owned by this old decrepit guy that hated gay people people moving into the neighborhood so
00:16:59
on the roof look it up look at what he used to say on the roof of Barney's Beanery oh no look at what he used to
00:17:05
say this is real this is a factual thing from the history of Barney's Beanery he painted on the
00:17:11
rooftop Carlos is so high he can't even do Barney so high I'm typing this correctly picture of gaser on Barney's
00:17:18
beanie re roof I guess I mean he there was pictures all over the internet at one point where is it am I crazy is this one
00:17:25
of those what do you callums uh Mandela effect where we know it's said something on the roof I think it's a Mandela effect no no no look at the look at the
00:17:31
thing I always thought it was this one Andrew honestly maybe that is it so that's the famous Barney this is am I
00:17:38
losing my mind that it used to I've never heard that I never heard that well you just saw the article about it so it is true it's what I've suck three dicks
00:17:45
in Barney's Beanery I just no so can I ask you about Barney yeah back in the day there were a lot of chicks there
00:17:50
were a lot of chicks yeah I usually go on the east side and it's more like a hipster Vibe over by where I live in
00:17:56
Echo Park and Silver Lake I don't really go out in weo that much but everyone there is like it's like aggressive
00:18:02
they're like really hot but like pretentious and they kind of look like like nepo babies nepo babies something
00:18:09
you wish you were you're a just a bum from Minnesota you got no Connections in this business but it was kind of fun being bar because like with this yeah it
00:18:21
felt like I had like a suicide vest on be honest have you gotten laid since yeah no since you've shaved your head like this do you think this is a deterrent oh yeah not helping he showed
00:18:33
me a video of this really hot girl that apparently he's hooked up with and then he takes off his hat and it's like a
00:18:39
Reveal video and the girl's like freaked out and it's kind of offensive to me because that's what I like really just
00:18:46
look like yeah that's what you look like all the time that's why he did it as a bit now what's the goal with this are we going to keep shaving your head how are
00:18:51
we going to get through this no I think I'm going to Mullet it once it grows my hair's I'm just going to look weird for like a few months it's why don't just
00:18:59
shave the whole thing and then start from the beginning I like you are balding though aren't you when I have
00:19:05
this yeah it's like like nothing has changed yeah I mean this looks yeah but then you take your hat off when when you get a girl to your apartment and she's going to be bummed unless you keep your
00:19:16
hat on the whole time that you're hooking up hat stays on so did you say that to her hat stays on hat stays on I
00:19:22
can imagine that could do you think that would work if you could get butt naked just leave the Hat on it doesn't work you've tried I've tried it doesn't work
00:19:28
yeah we should ask the resident bald guy yeah I've tried it doesn't work it's not cool to do you just got to like be up
00:19:33
front you got to post pictures of yourself looking the way you are on your face you tried to okay so back in the beginning when you were going bald like
00:19:39
this you'd get a girl to hang out with you and you would try to keep the Hat on the whole time did any of them say take
00:19:45
it off when they do ask to take it off I will take it off but sometimes they don't what's the response if you take it
00:19:51
off have you ever had a girl you take it off and she goes I got to get out of here no never never never Morgan and
00:19:57
Morgan what do I do I I have my phone what do I do I car ACD Morgan and more more Morgan right Morgan and Morgan what is it it's
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00:21:20
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00:21:26
you putting holes in the wall now you don't have to do that cuz look it's magnet mounted right on the back dude
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passions it's like if you were a girl with with a girl and she goes excuse me I got to take something and she took her legs off got to go sorry got to go no
00:22:24
you're already in the bed dude I both legs yeah yeah yeah you're already in the bed excuse me one second yeah yeah what is she misses Potato Head she's just taking off portions of her body no
00:22:36
I'd love to know that you that's so funny you know what I do that's what a nice guy I am at after we make love you'd want to know I take the I take the
00:22:42
Prosthetics and I put the Vaseline in to put it back on their legs the funny thing you think they use Vaseline to put
00:22:47
it back on how do they how do they get on well they're they're a lot of it depends but a lot of them Link in they
00:22:52
like it snaps in into their skin do you need Vaseline in their skin yeah yeah they have hooks in their
00:22:59
skin just hanging out just like fishing hooks anyway you would not you're a liar and I I also would car carry them well
00:23:07
like it's like they like we in Play We Are The Champions by Queen after you had sex yeah just parade her around yeah
00:23:13
hooray you know you be honest if you got home to a girl that you're dating and she just takes them both off you're not
00:23:20
going to react any type of way I'm not saying you kick her out of bed but you're not going to go oh [ __ ] I didn't know you didn't have Fu I use my acting
00:23:28
skills do them right now and I I would go pretend like it's not happening oh pretend like it's not she's not taking
00:23:34
off limbs yeah so do it I've had such a good night me too I'm feeling frisky I feel frisky too
00:23:44
well oh it feels so much better look oh look at the oh when I rub my Nubs it feels so good after a long day are you thirsty sometimes I hit my look at that look at this there's no place like home
00:23:56
there's no place like home you thirsty I hit my Nubs together will you get some lotion and and rub up my Nubs
00:24:03
please have you ever licked a nub in bed ooh you want to see you're right you're right it would never work well if they did it that way they got to say something about it lick they're going to say something they got they have two
00:24:15
[ __ ] legs missing they're going to say a joke or they're going to be self-aware yeah yeah they have to Carlos
00:24:20
makes a joke when he takes his hat off he makes a joke I always go oh I have crazy hair and they go and but they
00:24:26
always go I know because every girl nowadays Googles you before you go out yeah but but you especially because you
00:24:31
have a little bit of public recognition now but before that you would make jokes about it oh my God you he would say you
00:24:36
told me one time you go oh I'm having a bad hair day and he would take his hat off and the girls like it yeah that's a killer line I'm having a bad hair day
00:24:43
you know what worse than no legs having a prosthetic vagina they who has those I
00:24:49
don't know if they people right and then boom that would be a bummer can you hold
00:24:56
this yeah I'd grab the thing and just start [ __ ] yeah prosthetic any prosthetic you're right you're right you're actually it what an eyeball like one
00:25:10
eyeball just yeah comes right out yeah that would be a funny I would ask if I could use it oh you do what I be go there's another hole oh right
00:25:22
right there's one more hole I see I see I mean imagine though if she did take her eyeball out yeah what if she took her eyeball out and she was like let's use this for for foreplay
00:25:35
a bead yeah one bead well it's not an eyeball yeah it's a but it's fake yeah it's not a real eyeball it's just it's a marble or glass they made of glass so the ball glass
00:25:46
eyes the ball goes in my hole of course it does but guess what what it comes out of your
00:25:51
mouth goes in your butt and you go t yeah wow what are they made of glass what are most fake eyes made out of glass eye were really made of glass then now they're made of hard plastic acrylic
00:26:03
of course that makes sense the glass would be so much more dope to have a glass eyeball but I bet you it's just too how much is it I want to know like
00:26:10
if I want to buy one yeah let's order a couple of glass eyes to the studio no but I want to see like how high-end it
00:26:15
goes holy [ __ ] $8,000 the cheap one's 2500 I bet you I can get you one on the east side of La for like 40 bucks I bet you in my life I can go get
00:26:25
you one for 40 bucks like it's made out of wood yeah yeah human style ey used it
00:26:31
says used on Etsy 20 bucks oh 20 bucks used that's fine hand blown glass ey see I'm sure people get them for cheap but you could get a dope one for 8,300 okay let me see when
00:26:43
8,300 ey is they only last they last 10 years too that's long enough Bob can you
00:26:48
think about that if you lost an eye yeah how dope would you customize your eye oh my God I have like pterodactyl eyes he's
00:26:55
so cool I would have eyes that are like so otherworldly yeah I'd want something oh
00:27:01
look at that guy up top look at the first picture up top that guy third in that's cool see if if you lose an eye
00:27:06
you got to walk into the fight you know what I would do cyclop that's the way or I would do one Marty Feldman eye what
00:27:13
Marty Felman yeah what what do you mean look at his eyes I would do one gigantic eye just a just a huge eye like that
00:27:20
yeah but it's always looking the wrong way yeah yeah yeah I would put a gigantic Marty Feldman eye imagine having a conversation with that guy
00:27:28
like imagine he's imagine if you come over to his house and you work for like the gas company you know when he has to do like
00:27:33
mundane stuff yeah he looks cool in that photo I think when he bulges his eyes out like that's weird but well that's his thing when does he not bulge that's what he looks like oh that's right yeah
00:27:44
yeah I like it this dog's looking over there that dog's looking over there but he was such a great actor I don't know
00:27:52
what he was in other than knowing he was in Young Frankenstein but what else I don't know okay so yeah that's it but he
00:27:58
was great than that okay fine they needed a guy who could look both ways at the same time what has he done Marty Feldman
00:28:06
should have been a crossing guard at one point in his life yeah he should be all eye movies Hill of
00:28:12
eye Hills Have Eyes yeah Marty has eyes yeah uh eyes wide shut eyes eyes wi shut he
00:28:19
did a lot of stuff obviously but the one thing that took off clearly was young Frank aside that's the only thing he really was going to pop from yeah I mean
00:28:26
that's so anybody listening too if you're not if you've never seen that movie you're dumb Young Frankenstein one of the funniest movies ever made you got
00:28:32
to see it classic right Andreas can you back me up on that awesome movie yeah yeah it is very very funny that is one
00:28:37
of the what would you say that 70s 80s the the iconic 70s iconic comedy movies that you have to watch well I would say I would say if you're a comedy fan and you're you're young now you probably
00:28:48
don't know Monty Python and I would highly suggest watching mon python I would say sleeper sleeper Woody Allen
00:28:55
Sleeper yeah sleeper I would do um Mel Brook Brooks anything Mel Brooks really did Blazing Saddles but I would
00:29:02
also say probably go back and watch like uh like old school [ __ ] like watch like
00:29:07
I would say look up chaplain stuff cuz you want to talk about the original [ __ ] that dude was the original [ __ ] you don't watch chaplain what do you mean I
00:29:14
don't you've never I'm not popping it in now but I have seen it that's why what is it so funny no dude it's so how funny
00:29:20
it's not funny yes it I swear to God it is I promise you it is you're doing it right now yeah is
00:29:27
that funny yeah by the way how literal you would have been Charlie Charlie Chaplain just be in the jungle they're shooting at
00:29:41
me oh my God that's a great movie Charlie Charlie chap that would be great yeah no I really do I mean in the history of time when I've watched these old movies you
00:29:53
go I get where comedy now I see bruis from like you don't watch it again but you go
00:29:59
oh my God that's where so and so gets the way he falls the way Farley Falls right the way Farley did Pratt yeah
00:30:06
Falls that was indicative of so many other big [ __ ] uh what's his name um Buster Keon huh Buster Keaton well
00:30:12
Buster Keon for sure Fatty Arbuckle right it's like all these guys that were like overweight that like did physical
00:30:19
comedy you saw it again and again and again in our new guy I mean we do it we steal from oh yeah whatever comedy from
00:30:26
our history in our childhood was in our mind the way our brains and our faces work yeah who was a comic when you were
00:30:31
a kid that you try to emulate or an actor that you would do his motions nobody you never saw a guy and you tried to like the obvious reason for me we scream like Sam Kennison in the
00:30:45
bathroom but that's it no that's see that's a big thing cuz that does help yeah that's what you do on stage sometimes without you scream yeah yeah
00:30:52
I'm very influenced by him mine was always I mean Jim was everything Jim did I I wanted to mock let me ask you something
00:30:58
and this is going to be a weird question to ask you okay yeah so when we were when I was a kid in in standup I would
00:31:05
CU I never did the main room back then right and you see all the comics back there like you know and I'd go and I
00:31:12
would look up to them and I go wow they're cool this and that but we're when we're back there it doesn't feel
00:31:17
like we're cool no they don't like us so has it change no that's not true I'm sure that I'm sure that younger Comics
00:31:23
people look at like oh there's Andrew Santino Bobby Lee or whatever some some Comics I mean I'm sure not all of them
00:31:29
like all of us because my argument is this and this is what and I'm I'm not going to call out
00:31:35
names but here we go the doormen at The Comedy Store sometimes feel too comfortable oh wow they talk to me as if why you laughing
00:31:46
mcon because I've seen it yeah they talk to me as if their Headliners too like you know why don't you say something to him then I try but it's like I go you're you're you're acting like you're a
00:31:59
headliner and no no offense I've had your job but it's like you know you giving me a noogie they're grabbing you
00:32:07
yeah really oh yeah push me around I've never seen this yeah M they don't they don't do it in front of you what they do in front of me though yeah they they would not do that in front of I'm like wait a second I'm what happened to
00:32:20
the rules we got to fight back then what do I do punch P punch back well you can't punch spit lick oh Li I do too I
00:32:28
do too much of that I think that's what it is too right so you play with them too much so they think it's comfortable
00:32:35
like yeah okay go ahead well I mean go ahead like Chappelle Lacy what do you do to to Chappelle well he let the other day he walked by me and he crushed his fingers against my
00:32:48
neck can you imagine he would [ __ ] murder you that dude is so strong I know he would [ __ ] break you but he goes but he but when he's like playing with me he pretends I'm like a baby chimp to
00:33:00
him you are I know you're just so you can see him like kind of letting me dude he could crack you like a fortune cookie like a little fortune cookie just right in the middle why can't it just be like
00:33:10
a oatmeal cookie just a little fortune cookie I can't be peanut butter cookie no because like just like a fortune
00:33:15
you're filled with wisdom that's right see yeah but so I him and I stopped doing to Ian Edwards well he doesn't
00:33:21
like to be [ __ ] with you don't touch Ian Ian's very I did it for 20 years yeah it's not a good idea yeah he's still not over it it's weird I just like
00:33:28
I'll tackle him from behind and this come on yeah but with the young guys there they just they don't have the same
00:33:35
respect I don't know if this is true but to you to you and Sebastian I see how they treat you guys I they they look at
00:33:41
you like this no that's not I see I've seen it that's not the other day I swear to God they were like look at you like
00:33:47
this like everything you say is wisdom with me they're like well what do you but they they push me around and stuff and and they're like well that's the end of it tonight we're not putting
00:33:57
up with any of that anymore no more and and I would call out names we do it but I will not oh I will not because I want
00:34:04
to give himone a shot but it's like I've noticed it and you know I'm glad M that you've seen it he's seen it I know he's
00:34:11
hanging around the store a little bit too much yeah it it it does bother me he was chumming it up with what's her name
00:34:16
the other night who curly hair girl Angie Angie yeah yeah yeah he's buddying up way too close to her oh the girl you hung out with instead of him that one night
00:34:27
what does that mean what are you implying hi guy I'm not high bro yeah what are you implying though no I was
00:34:33
just trying to like remember Guy hey Guy check this out dude I was just trying listen gu guy okay all right what's up
00:34:40
I'm um I I like to take like I we did with Jesse other people and I did it with Esther I did it with Benji I did it with a bunch of you done it with me yeah you I've done it Sandy dant all these guys right I like to mentor and take him
00:34:53
to dinner and go here are the ropes and do you need need any help I promise I wasn't implying anything else okay so I
00:34:59
don't know what you're implying friend the there's no dark magic or ar I did it with you I know and here I am thank you
00:35:07
yeah you're welcome I appreciate it yeah yeah it was a bad idea to do with him I me sometimes you make a mistake your
00:35:14
instinct is wrong your instincts are wrong right you're going to pick a few bad horses yes they're not all going to
00:35:19
win the race I still think of you when we pass by some of those places what places we went to when he's picking up crack at night no we went to the
00:35:26
Newsroom Cafe on Robertson that's gone well we went back in the day yeah I remember where's the where did he take where the nicest place he took you the Chinese place on Beverly with Charlie
00:35:37
Charlie Finn yeah he was cool yeah yeah yeah Charlie Finn you know Charlie Finn I don't know who that is he's like one
00:35:44
of my best friends Charlie Finn Charlie Finn was on a sitcom with Zack knon and Maz dbr I'll show the picture we life on
00:35:51
a stick just for Andre oh yeah I like this guy I know him I like him yeah and Charlie fin is so funny what a face on
00:35:57
that guy yeah he was he was Super Troopers he was so good so good in Super Troopers yeah but he's my best buddies
00:36:03
in the whole world that guy yeah look you come up when you Google him huh interesting of course what you what did
00:36:09
you do together that's why you shot something together no him him and I so I was on Mad TV and he was on life on a
00:36:16
stick it was a bug show no so they did a move they did a TV show called life on with Zack knon who's on Magnum PI miles dubron and Charlie and it was a show about um life on a
00:36:28
stick hot dog on a stick oh was that they worked at Hot Dog who's the girl I know who the girl is but um well let's
00:36:34
find out so they hot yeah they work on a hot dog on a stick oh I see why this one
00:36:40
didn't take I know it's crazy you know what the irony is this has this has feelers it feels to me reminiscent of uh
00:36:48
uh the uh two brok girls it has that same Vibe it's got the same colorization the same look it's shot the same way
00:36:56
this is what always bothered me about TV back in the day we only found out recently look at her [ __ ] hair yeah
00:37:01
her hair was the girl who works at the hot dog stand doesn't have [ __ ] hair like that these good-look kids don't
00:37:06
work at hot dog stand they you know who works at a hot dog stand Mone that's who works at a hot dog take off your hat
00:37:12
this is the kid you see in the mall going you guys want a hot dog that's who does it not some beautiful girl and two
00:37:18
really good-look guys that was the problem of TV they casted hot people in non-hot rolls mhm is that a DVD it's
00:37:25
fan-made it even says it all right Jesus Christ by the way you know who works in a hot dog stand today who you and me
00:37:32
what do you mean we would pass on a show like this today oh that's true you can't get two hot people on there you got to get two guys yeah yeah two goof asses
00:37:39
who failed out out of life but anyway who was the girl look up the name right there go back to all I'd like to see
00:37:44
what her name is to see if she's now Lily oh no Sage Thompson and and relle Zach is killing it but I'm sure they're sure they're all doing great
00:37:56
well I mean want to see we we all do show we all do shows that uh didn't go yeah but it's good I mean I'm sure
00:38:01
they're all you know you keep moving along in this business yeah you try these Pilots I've tried so many you tried so
00:38:07
many try try try try try try try try try try try try yeah V guess v v v v v v um
00:38:15
guess what what I bought my brother a car on vroom and he loves it you're maybe one of the best Brothers I've ever
00:38:21
known we all know how much of a hassle buying car is can be right it stinks you spend so much time driving around right
00:38:27
Andrew trying to find the perfect car it you go from dealership to dealership and you're like I want to go get lunch I don't want to hassle I don't want to
00:38:33
haggle and negotiate poof now what we got we got V we got V it's so much easier no more man
00:38:39
thanks to v v is the better way to buy and sell used cars buddy when you go to room.com you can shop thousands of cars right from your phone they have all the
00:38:45
popular makes and models no haggle pricing you know you're getting a good deal and the best of all they deliver the ride directly to your house they
00:38:51
dropped off Bobby's brother's car at his house man didn't have to go anywhere you can also sell or trade in your current car on V and they'll pick it up for free
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answer a few questions about your car on the Vroom website you'll get an offer in as little as 2 minutes you have no obligation to sell there's nothing to
00:39:05
lose so whether it's buying your next car selling or trading in your current one vroom has you covered start shopping
00:39:11
today at vroom.com that's room.com VOR guess what guess what we're going to Australia we're going down on M and we're going to use vur that's right to to to to do excursions experiences and
00:39:24
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over 300,000 travel experiences you'll remember do more with VOR can you call our friend oh yeah um who what's going
00:40:31
on now I got a little present for you oh I love it it's a big it's a dude okay this is wild all right does he know yeah we just texted a
00:40:42
couple seconds ago who is it hello hello hello yes hello is this the great Michael
00:40:54
Winslow what left wait wait what do you mean what mean what's left of you we're on the phone
00:41:00
with the great Michael Winslow he's a legend a legend we talked about you but Michael do you live in LA or
00:41:08
no I'm in Florida but but I'm also up up in Washington we're we're up in outside
00:41:14
of Olympia right now oh you are you're on the road yeah we're in the mountains right now oh in the mountain so for
00:41:20
people we want to explain at home one of the one of we have starlink in the mountains so oh you're star linking up
00:41:25
there you got Elon technology oo fancy fancy boy I mean how else am I going to upload and download 4K if I want to do
00:41:32
stuff that's exactly right right the porn one of the greatest actors and voice actors see here here's here's the
00:41:38
thing you got to be able to have especially for music oh my gosh I got I gotta have data link stuff because we do
00:41:44
you know I got music coming coming out Mr windo what do you think I gotta have I gotta have that quality to be able to
00:41:50
Uplink what do you think if starlink had uh what would it sound like when it was communic through space zapping down to
00:41:58
you well remember in space no one can hear you [Laughter] scream yeah W God you still got it in Spades baby you
00:42:19
have to understand as long as everybody makes noises you you guys know that every person man woman whoever you got
00:42:26
skill set you got the sound but we don't use it don't you could have so much fun and it
00:42:34
could go so many different ways provided you use the sounds for the proper Good Michael do you now do you during the
00:42:39
course of the day do you continually imitate things that you hear as you go about course of your day and put it down in your phone to like give yourself
00:42:45
notes to keep working on sound well that sounded just like a cough was that a cough sorry let me put my headphones on here I'm just trying that was good
00:42:56
that sounded exactly real cough yeah well here up up in the mountains we have this thing called Scotch broom it's it's pollen and um if you're are you you guys
00:43:08
use your voices every day so you understand yes yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah we've had a lot of a lot of allergens in
00:43:14
the air I don't know if you heard me I was saying during the course of the day do you ever do you record yourself listening to sounds and you imitate them
00:43:20
during the course of the day do you ever do that uh not necessarily it depends on
00:43:25
what what what the day is I'm doing voice over stuff you know I'm listening for what possibilities I can bring into
00:43:31
it right okay if I do a sound do you think you could find out quickly what it is because I feel like you're such in tune with noises all right I'm gonna do
00:43:37
a sound you tell me what you think it is ready are you gonna make it or is this or is this or is this an actual
00:43:42
recording I'm gonna make it I promise and then I want you to tell me what you think it is ready go
00:43:51
[Music] ahead what do you think hi hang on let me ask my hip hop app snary yo snary what you think that
00:44:05
is yo I think it is a vacuum cleaner who whoa serious oh Siri I gotta be honest with you no no no this is her cousin
00:44:17
with an Oher rad wow I hate to tell you that was a Tesla Model X but it does sound like a vacuum cleaner let's try one more time you got
00:44:27
a noise Bob here you go here you [Music] go now what do we think that is I think it's if I'm not mistaken what
00:44:48
do you think snary yo you're on your own yo thanks doesn't know whoow thanks well you know what I did buy it at the snooper market
00:44:59
so you know she was next to the Snoop Loops so Snoop Loops oh Snoop oh by the way you can get
00:45:09
those anyway what I think that is me because of my sense of humor kind of sounds like a sheep trying to get out of a Tesla that's what it is that's what it was that's what it is that's exactly
00:45:20
what it was W dude you're kidding you're kidding yeah that's what it is you are a legend oh you're a legend dude
00:45:25
unbelievable I appreci I I really appreciate you listening to our sounds I do want to see if we could do it back with you will you make a sound and see
00:45:31
if maybe I can identify what it is yeah oh I already did but but anyway um oh let's see what do you got in the chamber baby turns the chamber well let's see I
00:45:46
have to step outside a second hey Mr what up yo me fo me fool sorry that's that's Mr Al by the way where's my cookie pox
00:46:14
mother [ __ ] amazing amazing amazing I don't want to take up too much of your time we appreciate we just we talked
00:46:20
about you on the podcast want to reach out to you we're huge fans and we really appreciate you and we love you and uh
00:46:26
thank you so much for taking the time when you come down to La will you come on our show oh absolutely I'd be honored
00:46:33
and besides you guys make noises are you kidding me we do we do we do not like you but we do yeah we're different we're we're uh we could we could work on we could work on oh D we would love that AB
00:46:45
love it I would absolutely take one of your classes yeah here with us let me give you let me give you one that's easy
00:46:51
right okay okay um this is something that they use in all of the s fiction films regarding trolls and Elks and Orcs
00:47:00
and everything else Bobby's an orc I'm an orc this is this is one of the Lord of the Rings type of noises something
00:47:06
simple uh horse hoofs are you ready horse H yes okay this is easy wow how how how
00:47:21
so wow you know that also sound yeah it it sounds like and and don't forget and don't forget oh yeah he farted that he
00:47:32
farted oh actually that's the wrong end but you're close we want to tell you that we love
00:47:39
you and we appreciate you and we'll be talking to you soon because we we want to get you on the show will you guys
00:47:44
continue to make noises and and breaking rules in organized man we shall we shall thank you Michael you're the best Bye
00:47:49
Michael you're the best so that's incredible incredible that man is an amazing amazing machine God I wish we could do that you can you
00:48:02
did it no but his yours is way better than mine let's hear let's hear when a phone gets
00:48:08
disconnected no that's pretty good really yeah what about you let's do an open do he did opening a door do opening a
00:48:19
door perfect really that's so good you do one whoa that's all my doors they sound like oh they do well they got to be they're
00:48:29
too wedged to the ground but those are easy ones let's try to do a hard one okay like um a car engine I don't know
00:48:36
if I can you do yeah man go ahead yeah that's good yeah yeah how about this do a toaster
00:48:52
good hold on let me try it's hard ready mine's like this mine's like yeah bread oh wow yeah we tuned mine to
00:49:12
say bread yeah yeah yeah um what is this what do you got here I have this um bro
00:49:18
we didn't see any any any banana somewhere right yeah little little Chinese k black
00:49:31
ey why do they react that way D dude what why do they react don't know that that's why she said little she said Foreigner Foreigner little black little black no he didn't it's translated right
00:49:43
there on the screen where's the banana he said that yeah but I think he's just genuinely looking for bananas
00:49:49
that has nothing to do with and the and the kid was going I know Chinese bro any any banana somewhere right okay stop
00:49:56
stop stop so that there's two things going on a racist little kid no that's not what that is a racist little
00:50:02
kid grandma look Foreigner right African little black little black what what the crap is that crazy
00:50:15
that is insane that she fre man that little Chinese girl is right let's cancel her let's find out find out where
00:50:21
find out where she Liv preschool is and cancel her and cancel her take away her toys wow we won't stand for this kind of
00:50:27
behavior in our society anymore and I mean it cancel this young little Chinese girl thank you Carlos for bringing that
00:50:32
to my attention yeah no problem man these young Chinese kid but there was a video I saw of a a a black guy in Africa
00:50:39
meeting a white girl and he ran away it's the same thing no it's not it is no because historically whites that meet Africans uh probably not a good look yes African see whites coming and
00:50:52
they're like get these [ __ ] pigs out of here okay that's coming out is the get out
00:50:58
trailer okay yeah oh was that just the movie get out that you thought it was I think it I think it was Jordan's
00:51:08
movie I saw that's what it was that is insane yeah wow that's a crazy video give me something Carlos Pig all right here's this girl just found out I'm up for two
00:51:21
Grammys my very first time you guys wow my name is Bobby stor and I'm up for two gramys
00:51:35
[Music] two are able to be quiet but they're enjoying it so while we're sitting here could I please I'm not enjoying it so I'm asking you can you be
00:51:47
quiet that's say yes or is this fake it's not fake okay wait a minute she she's nominated for two grand okay wait is she though yeah TMZ is reporting that she's like an actual gospel singer
00:52:00
nominated for the Grammys who name is Bobby storm wait a minute and this flight attendant really told her to shut up yeah just get her on a Southwest
00:52:07
flight those idiots sing all the time I mean she looks she's not in Delta Comfort either she's like a normal coach
00:52:13
so I don't think were you judging her by her class even I fly Delta Comfort yeah you know and you don't deserve it you
00:52:18
know what Bob we're knocking him down he's not flying Comfort anymore because of that last comment you think you're better than the girl that won two Grammys you're not I am because don't
00:52:25
yell during flights I don't call well yeah you're on drugs you pass out the whole time you're intoxicated the whole
00:52:31
flight have you ever taken a bad friends flight with us and not been on drugs or alcohol no of course not but don't you
00:52:37
want it that way so I'm medicated I want I just don't want you to have a freakout moment of that guy's not real like that
00:52:42
chick while you're baked on something girl she's doing podcast I I I know I know what the situation is now well
00:52:48
let's finish it let's see the rest I know what it is I'm shocked J if I don't can you please answer my question are
00:52:53
you willing and able to be quiet right now I'm doing what the Lord is telling me to do I'm asking you a question yes or no I'm your flight leader I need you
00:53:00
to follow my instruction okay my instruction for you to answer my question are you able to be quiet what do you guys
00:53:06
think I'm asking you ma'am I'm asking you guys he better break out the song too if you're not able to be to follow
00:53:12
my instruction you will not be taking this flight ah okay are you able to be quiet if that's the case then that's
00:53:18
fine if you were the person in charge of it all I'm your flight leader yes if you're the person in charge of it all
00:53:24
then that's fine all right thank you I don't buy this I don't buy it they're both in the wrong time out I don't buy that this how could this happen he sees the camera the whole time
00:53:38
you're telling me that guy sees that camera and is acting like that I think he's just the middle seat guy like I
00:53:44
would have started filming too if like something gospel singer Bobby storm nearly kicked off the no he was filming
00:53:49
the whole time she announced that she won the Grammy she must know the human that filmed this dude no
00:53:55
it's filming while she announces I won a Grammy it's not it's not as if he's aware of what's going on what what if
00:54:02
guy's like slightly doing it he's not look at how [ __ ] obvious it is you can tell he's not hiding what are you angry about because this makes me mad
00:54:08
this isn't real there's something about this that looks fake as [ __ ] I call fake
00:54:13
as [ __ ] on this this is a faf moment fake as [ __ ] Carlos is gonna go on his own profile now no it's cuz I saved I
00:54:21
get it look okay let's just break it coordinated this is let's break it down you're getting angry for my very first time you guys my name is Bobby storm not for
00:54:33
second so what you're saying is everyone's in on it no goofball the guy that's filming it is clearly in on it
00:54:40
look at how clear the images him recording this girl she said but some of those little cameras now with the CIA
00:54:46
and stuff cut it out if we're going to have a real argument cut it out cut out what cut that [ __ ] out this isn't a
00:54:51
little [ __ ] CIA you're really angry about that this guy is isn't coach this isn't CIA he's filming on his [ __ ]
00:54:57
iPhone like this okay and she said film me she turned around she told all the people on the plane I'm up for two Grammy nominations this [ __ ] flight attendant is definitely in on this
00:55:08
there's no chance he would act like this cuz she's singing so they did that so she could get more yes no what's the
00:55:15
because it blew up on the [ __ ] internet and we're talking about it it worked it worked like a charm she won
00:55:22
look at us we have to do it yes let's blow up on the next flight no we're not going to blow up a flight we mean blow
00:55:27
up the next flight wow I never look so obvious it's all over TMZ yeah Carlos bring a gun to
00:55:34
the airport when we fly out we could bring the gun on the flight and then I could pull it out and you yeah bring the gun on the flight you could tackle me
00:55:39
and we could go viral yeah bring a gun to the airport Carlos that's not the same thing I don't think who do we hire
00:55:44
here but we could put bad friends on the gun it'll be a whole you know what it is I want you to strip naked on the plane and sing daddy while you die and I'll
00:55:51
record it done that's interesting press play again watch and I'm up for two gramy wait wait stop st stop really
00:56:03
rewind it right before it cuts he was already there he was already there correct and he was listening to her
00:56:08
thank you interesting interesting go ahead now she's singing beautifully by the way are you need to be quiet but they're enjoying stop for a stop for a second are you going to be quiet why would he
00:56:24
do she's just chatting it's not illegal look at the back of her head let's see is she a robot she's AI no she's
00:56:32
white this is a girl in black face look at the back of her head this is a girl in black face yeah it's black face wow
00:56:39
good find wud I thought that was I thought that was a plug I thought she was plugged in somewhere I thought she was AI yeah no well we found you out we
00:56:47
found you out Whitey what what's her name she did a good job Bobby storm I don't believe the
00:56:53
second of this in fact get her on the show if she want to talk about it cuz I think this sound this is phony baloney incredible though but if um who would
00:57:01
stop a woman from singing Beautiful music that doesn't make sense well I was the my other theory was is that he's
00:57:06
better I I thought he was going to start singing with her and duet that's what I thought no but I thought like I have
00:57:12
this job well was a great job right but you getting Grammy I can sing better so so he's like watch this shut the [ __ ] up I don't want to yeah that would have been dope if he did that then I would
00:57:24
have been like this is a flight attendant by the way I don't where's my grammy when we fly and the flight attendants do that thing where they like
00:57:30
get chummy and sing and make jokes cut it out cut it the [ __ ] out I don't want
00:57:36
jokes okay let me we're in a flying machine you're really negative right now dude what if they're gay though they're
00:57:42
all gay they're all gay dude what are you talking about there isn't one guy flight attendant to you think that guy wasn't gay well that's what I was saying
00:57:48
I it's on the job description but I don't like when the girls like do their thing but when the guys do it I'm like it's okay also you know I don't like
00:57:55
when anybody song and dances when the whole plane laughs though and the guy makes a joke I always look at everyone I
00:58:01
can look at I go cuz you're jealous what cuz you're I think I'm jealous a little I I'm not
00:58:06
jealous I'm just on a machine where I'm flying in the sky I just want to go to the place I'm going I don't need to be
00:58:12
like a funny pilot I don't nobody needs a funny pilot hey we're going to be going over the Rockies today might be a
00:58:18
little bump or uh a little rocky if you might add uh [ __ ] off [ __ ] off you're
00:58:23
flying a plane [ __ ] off don't make a joke you're in a death machine in the sky there's nothing I
00:58:30
don't want a funny pilot I don't want a uh I don't want a nice bartender there's some things that require different Vibes
00:58:38
but doesn't it but but let me ask you I just going to say about flying I do have something to say about that um I don't
00:58:43
want a funny pilot I don't want a nice bartender I don't want a non-racist cop but the things I like right right but in a plane right it some people have tension and anxiety right and sometimes
00:58:56
a funny pilot or funny okay you're a funny pilot and I'm I'm a guy on a flight with terrible anxiety ready okay
00:59:01
get over the PA system and make a joke here we go well guys uh we're going to have a safe and uh nice ride I've only
00:59:09
crashed three of them I'm kidding folks oh there's a bomb on the plane there's a bomb on the plane should be there's a bomb on the plane he shouldn't be going outside well you insided it cuz you're a goofball pilot
00:59:22
lol l l not funny fly the can but don't you think that like just get me to Spokan what if there was a funny like Nazi soldier that was funny during the
00:59:34
camp doesn't that his personality no what would a funny Nazi Soldier be like I don't know give us an example yeah you do the accents go ahead you're the funny
00:59:48
Nazi you know I'm someone you're please don't hurt me please don't not get you I don't know we'll get Michael Winslow on the phone he'll do a funny
01:00:06
Nazi can we talk anything about love or dating or anything with you or oh no yeah I have a update let's give an
01:00:12
update oh hold on Bobby love update it's a Bobby love update Bobby love update it's a Bobby love update oh song isn't that long we got to
01:00:26
oh [ __ ] okay sorry my bad what's an update let's go I'm going to die alone shut up no I'm
01:00:32
done what do you mean you're done I I I realized I don't want to do it yes you do I know I Carlos you get I'm saying no here's what it is first of all don't be on Carlos's know we're in the same
01:00:44
please he's on substances it's just I can't do it what can't you do conversations with with women yeah I
01:00:52
just everything annoys me I I I've never met anybody where I'm like oh I'm not annoyed you don't like small talk I
01:00:58
don't like what they sometimes even have to say even most of the time you well I
01:01:03
mean I mean you have to be obsessed with them to be into it I have to be like obsessed to be into it if I'm I mean it's like you know you have to be in love what do you mean obsessed what a
01:01:15
gross word yeah I have to have like a crush on them to be in say that it's like you know when they say stuff like you know I love the fall when when when
01:01:22
the leaves change color L the guy to be obsessed with them like what a creep but
01:01:28
I I get what he's saying though I have to want to stalk them yeah you have to have that that's actually true I Crush
01:01:33
you have to have a crush a crush yeah yeah that's what it means yeah yeah not stock yeah but when they say stuff like
01:01:38
you know like the fall the the leaves change color they say stuff like that and you go yeah but you don't like any
01:01:45
of that no what kind of conversation do you want you want deep philosophical [ __ ] you want a girl to be like what's
01:01:51
the meaning of life no like where like no like um you know what if a girl said this to you on a date first date and she
01:01:57
goes give me an example why can't to totally different foods mix like if I took a California
01:02:03
roll and I had it with beef stroganov why can't I do that like if I must see see that right there is more interesting
01:02:09
to me I know I'm saying so you want someone you want you I'd be like yeah dude right let's get you as a girl yeah
01:02:15
let's find girls out there here how we're putting it out to fans if you're a weirdo chick that that's not a weirdo thing
01:02:23
100% it is no because listen to people's conversations it's all whack conversations are mostly Bullit when I hear people talk I go what are they talk about so find a weirdo that you can have weird conversations it's Weir I don't I
01:02:34
don't like the connotation that you saying it's weird you are weird it's weird I'm not weird it's not a weird thing I just I'm
01:02:40
uh I don't even know the word I'm uh eccentric eccentric yeah that's like a nice way say weird unique yeah unique I'm unique yeah weird yeah dude you're
01:02:52
weird I'm weird we're weird no it's like you know like we're weird it's okay well
01:02:58
so I can't I like even if I start a conversation with a girl they just don't know what I'm talking about it's like I
01:03:04
go dude you think that like the Talking Heads were just on um what's so funny stepen colar yeah all four of them they haven't announced a reunion tour so I you know I was on a date and I go so
01:03:15
what does that mean do you think and she's like what's that I go what's what the Talking Heads all right you called
01:03:22
me and I go what you called me yeah Didn't I call you about that yeah we called you talked to me about it and you asked me how the talking heads and we
01:03:28
went over their albums and yeah yeah my point is see I'd [ __ ] you so then you should date me [ __ ] you well then let's date me but like here that's what I I
01:03:34
want a girl that doesn't look like that but has shares similar you know what I mean all right and somebody also that's
01:03:42
funny so me why don't you just date me I don't want to [ __ ] you though you're ugly to me I'm not ugly no I'm not a TR
01:03:48
to you oh get over also can I just say the about you you're also temperamental so are you yeah I don't want to go go
01:03:54
out with temperamental fine all right you're too temperamental well let's put it out there if you're a girl who's a little eccentric like Carlos actually ew
01:04:02
what you would [ __ ] him before you'd [ __ ] me a female version of him yeah you [ __ ] him before you [ __ ] out all the people in the room probably he's first
01:04:09
mhm Mone second you're third and Andreas is fourth I'm okay with that female yeah
01:04:16
okay I'm not why that pisses me off shut the [ __ ] up dude I'm a babe dude you're not someone could I I I'll I'll even double
01:04:28
down on it right you're pissing me off dude right I don't even know sometimes this is going to start a fight
01:04:36
I sometimes I look at your wife and I want to go oh no like how do you do it oh my I think I did mention it to her and she goes I just
01:04:47
have my ways of doing it you know she never [ __ ] said that something like that yeah it's [ __ ] bu but you're a
01:04:54
lovely guy let me say something that intro I gave you tonight [ __ ] you dude shut the [ __ ] up did I give you a good intro tonight it was fake but it
01:05:05
was good yeah it was good fake and you what you you smiled at me what you smiled at me yeah I say you son of a
01:05:11
[ __ ] no you didn't you hugged me I hugged you and you go I'll see you later pal yeah that's what you said to me did
01:05:19
you not I did that's what we are you're one of my best friends there we go so why don't you want to [ __ ] me because of that your tone I get it
01:05:33
yeah yeah yeah also like a girl imagine a girl version where are you going oh I'm in I'm going to be in Mazon playing
01:05:38
golf for 5 days it's like where how fun for you you don't have to talk to me about anything I get I go I am out of your hair we just don't have those
01:05:45
things in common that's the best part you don't want a girl that has stuff in Comm with you you just said you don't want to talk to them about anything I
01:05:51
just want somebody to know what I know just date me please okay no but Carlos if you find a girl that's like you but not as high and has
01:06:04
hair so not him you in terms of like because I feel like when we're on the road you can handle my [ __ ] yeah you have a you
01:06:16
pay him to handle your [ __ ] he's always been like that he can withstand Insanity because because he absorbs it
01:06:22
mcon can't do it he's like a deer in head lights yeah he's not he smiles and you know mean you know who Mone is M's
01:06:27
the guy that forgets fries with a burger yeah that's that guy [ __ ] I want that guy and Carlos does not Carlos will
01:06:33
forget both but he wouldn't forget one and Andre boring boring what the [ __ ] if you call
01:06:40
him after n he won't pick up no chance not a chance not a chance he literally said tonight I go we're GNA be recording
01:06:46
lat he goes I will be in my pj but I will be there yeah my B but anyway you wear pajamas to bed at night I do you
01:06:53
[ __ ] nerd Carlos let me ask you you put on literal pajamas [ __ ] nerd Carlos out of girls if we were all girls
01:07:00
who would you date first if it was in it if I was in it for the long haul and I wanted to like
01:07:06
really settle down yeah yeah how philosophical the Long Haul I really think I would date Andrew yeah for the Long Haul it's obvious dude but the reason why security no no no not
01:07:18
security it's more that Andrew it's the golfing and stuff it's like go do your thing and I'll like we go do our
01:07:24
separate things but the reason why is I'll have side girls like you oh you're going to be hooking up with him behind
01:07:30
my back exactly all right yeah no you know you know what you don't understand is imagine I'm a girl okay so if I'm not
01:07:37
golfing what am I doing at home we [ __ ] all the time yeah we hang we no we [ __ ]
01:07:42
all the time you guys are going to get bored you're going to get bored I can feel it but I can [ __ ] two people though
01:07:49
if I [ __ ] Andrew and then he goes in golfs and matalon I can [ __ ] you and yeah I don't want to [ __ ] you with
01:07:55
behind his what am I doing in Mason by the way Happ golfing I wish there's not a golf course there there is I've never
01:08:01
been y'all wouldn't know about each other I would lie and keep oh so we don't have this we're not too bad we'd
01:08:07
run into each other at Trader Joe's one day right and he would be on the phone FaceTiming with you and I'd go is that
01:08:13
also your dick smells it would be on us yeah smell 100% Carlos I go yeah be real
01:08:20
your dick smells dude it doesn't smell yeah D I'll put cologne on it yeah I smell it on you is that Carlos yeah yeah
01:08:28
how oh yeah okay yeah is that Carlos yeah it was in my mouth I just I I bre I breathed out sorry me too
01:08:35
hey you know what appeared like one of those Ghostbusters ghosts the green the green one the green
01:08:42
smog yeah all right well we're gonna find a lady for you no I'm done I I I I'm being I'm not I want to find a lady
01:08:48
for you email please email Carlos in the booth at no no Carlos in the booth it doesn't work attracted to any of them Carlos in the booth gmail.com they have tattoos on their neck Carlos in the
01:09:00
booth at gmail.com please email Carlos in the booth turn down anybody and send us a video of your proposal of why you
01:09:07
want to date Bob and maybe we'll get you on a good you never know dude you could there's so many fish out there you just got to put your line in the water okay
01:09:13
thank you for being a bad friend woo woo yeah woo