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this week we're gonna be in Spokane Spokane Seattle Portland Phoenix Arizona come out and
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see us you guys those are uh the dates that we're doing until we take a little baby break come back and then we'll be
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back out on the road doing Florida and the rest of the dates so for now go see us at Spokane Seattle Portland and
00:00:19
Phoenix Arizona because we love giving you hugs I love giving you hugs and kisses great shows bad friends pod.com
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badfriendspod.com for those tickets we love you come see us two are bad friends who are these two
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idiots [Music]
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or something we're bad friends I mean there's certain sensitivities you know that you have that's very unusual to
00:00:45
this hey pot I'm kettle good to be Kettle good to meet you upon the pot no I'm pot I don't even know what that
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means the pot calling kettle black there it is yeah I don't know what never I don't even know what that meant when I
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said hey pot I'm Kettle saying you're you're this is the pot calling the kettle black but not all pots are black sure they are no my pot's silver
00:01:05
hey does it make any sense pots are all black pot lives matter okay I understand
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that that's right that I understand we're back in the studio we're back in the studio back in the
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studio welcome back we we're taking a little baby break from tour we just came home we just came home from Kiss everybody and you know we want to kiss
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the most on the mouth ladies and gentlemen it is the return of fen CB
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fancy we haven't seen you in so long yeah have we been missing you some of the
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fans have missed you a little bit we got a shout out we missed you have we missed you that's a very good question we
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um no no no no no yeah no have you missed have you missed
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fancy when I saw him today I realized how much I missed him oh it's like one of those yeah yeah yeah You Don't Know
00:01:55
What You Got Till It's Gone it's like when you watch a movie they haven't seen a long time you know I should have seen this movie sooner but you know when you
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watch that movie and you go it's okay that I didn't see it it's that too yeah yeah it doesn't mean anything
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yeah you know it's like if you haven't it's like imagine when you're like you know what I'm I haven't seen I haven't
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re-watched The Godfather in years I haven't either and you re-watch it and you go that's okay yeah yeah that's good
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it's good it's so good yeah fancy is more like the Matrix no way why yeah
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because he's like you're like wow I forgot how good this is no no no no you were saying this because you were
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watching The Matrix on DVD on the bus yeah on the bus yeah it's really good by the way God we have so much to talk
00:02:36
about so much it's unbelievable what would we do yeah it was so much first I got a haircut show them take out the Hat
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can you show everybody at home it's so good for those listening look at that you gotta see it look at the turn to the
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sides they can see the back a little bit I want to change my name to Ricky Ricky too Ricky too ladies and gentlemen Ricky
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too also I just talk like this how you doing is that your Ricky too boys what are you doing that's uh that's the
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old days you kind of do look like the old days a little bit yeah you went back in time look at how old look at how young look at look no look at the
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[ __ ] fourth one no on second world down that one yeah he's so young wow oh wow look at that
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young young and um you look not that funny you look young now
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yeah thanks man you look young and healthy right now it's almost as if the stress of the tour hasn't gotten to you at all
00:03:27
it hasn't been no the tool was a good reprieve it's been a reprieve it's from from the stress I think that's the wrong
00:03:33
word reprieve but I do like it reprove it's not a good word I don't think so I don't think it's the one what's reprieve
00:03:38
reprieve a reprieve is like uh yeah it's like a kit to postpone to cancel the punishment
00:03:45
of someone from yeah yeah so yeah yeah because my La life is yeah I mean what
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is it it's a horror Fest yeah so when I go on it's a reprieve no okay well then
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you and you said it right oh yeah the tour has been amazing we've been living on a bus juicy has been sleeping in one of
00:04:03
the coffins Bobby's been sleeping in the coffins it's been really uh who gets the fancy room in the back you better
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believe it yeah yeah because I guess he's the guy he's the guy yeah he's the main man he's the guy well when the bus
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pulls up all the fans outside go yeah and they shake the physical boss
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it's insane yeah they go hey Bobby where's Andrew where's Andrew you've
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really heard that really yeah yeah I've never heard that I never heard the chance oh you're
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sleeping yeah yeah also we did have a guy shout out to our friend in Charlotte we said it was Charlotte not Durham was
00:04:37
it Charlotte Papi Chulo oh no Papi Chulo I think was Durham nose in Durham before
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we got to Charlotte oh that's Papi Chulo there was a guy up in the balcony this is to just to inflate fancy bees huge
00:04:49
Spanish Head there was a guy who said what's fancy B yo and we said dude he had a baby he's not on the tour and and
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I said what's your name he goes Papi Chulo in Durham North Carolina yeah and
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I was like what do you do and he's like I'm a DJ he's the only Latin DJ in North Carolina
00:05:07
sorry yeah we um we met a lot of you guys and thank you guys so much for coming out um
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it was really interesting to see the variety of people tons of different kinds I mean you got the little ones
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little little you got the big ones we got the jigglys what's a jiggly juice a
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Jew what I said the jiggly juice yeah you know we got skinnies a lot of
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skinnies so we got a variety of them we have different sect from different walks of life we have different races classes
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socioeconomic statuses Heights weight sexuality sexualities yeah two blind
00:05:41
guys that came together yeah a deaf guy with spinal bifida in his spine he was the best yeah Marcus Marcus shout out to
00:05:48
Marcus is that where spinal Buffet is in the spine or somewhere else I think it happens back there spinal bifida it's a
00:05:54
spine it's inspired it's in the [ __ ] word how mean would it be if it happened somewhere else yeah if you had on your
00:06:01
shoulder that'd be weird my rotator cuff uh is it the spine spina bifida it's Spina oh not spinal birth defect such an
00:06:08
area of the spinal column doesn't form properly so why wouldn't they call it spinal bifida yeah they should you're
00:06:13
right in this I know I am leaving a section of the spinal cord and spinal nerves exposed through an opening in the back spina bifida occurs in one in every
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2 000 live births in the United States most common central nervous system birth defect one in two thousand that doesn't seem we
00:06:27
could have got it we could have [ __ ] got it oh my God one in two thousand yeah pretty common
00:06:32
what else is Down syndrome what's Down syndrome wondering what what's the commonality of down syndrome
00:06:38
the percentage what do you think that well before he types to enter what do you think it is Down syndrome is one in
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what I say one in Sixty thousand I say one in 150. I was gonna say one at four
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okay each year it one in every 700 babies wow wow one in seven hundred we could
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have had it each year six thousand babies born in the United States have downturn as mean as downtown records one in every 700 babies wow does that seem
00:07:02
the odds it seems more that I think I thought it'd be enough I don't know maybe like because you know when you you
00:07:08
just a lot they don't all make it
00:07:20
how do you know this well you just had a baby you're right do you do all the genetic testing on your baby to find out
00:07:25
the health yeah 10 fingers ten toes type of thing and then so when you find all that stuff that they tell you any negatives whatsoever before the baby was
00:07:32
born yeah what was is there something wrong with the baby at all no that's why she's here no but I mean is there
00:07:38
anything that she has that they're like well this is a thing but who knows no no other than being your child right it's
00:07:45
like but could they be wrong like they do the genetic testing and then it comes out and then that's some oops going on
00:07:50
that I don't know maybe can you I'll be so mad do you think his kid's gonna be good looking when she's older like do
00:07:57
you think what are the odds of his baby being good looking she's gonna be like I know what she's gonna look like
00:08:02
um a literary agent a lit agent a lit age oh my God what's that like a
00:08:08
librarian like a library it's a nice way to sing a library yeah a lit agent don't get angry dude oh you think she's gonna
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be Kate Moss there's no way man you think she's gonna be Kate Moss there's no way man Bobby could have used a more
00:08:21
uh current reference but Kate Moss yeah I don't know anybody um everyone listening right now doesn't know who that is that's what you're yes that's
00:08:28
your daughter dude there she is hi what's your kid's name the librarian perfect perfect yeah yeah
00:08:36
hi welcome to Bakersfield Library I'm the librarian hi it's um Andres your daughter yes fancy is my father wow are
00:08:45
you looking to check out a book or you can leave no like oh we worked together oh what did you do with my father
00:08:51
it ran the boards he was very boring yeah I will tell you dude who doesn't know
00:08:57
who came up look how hot she is still I think young people don't know who Kate mosses well give me a give me a modern day supermodel
00:09:03
uh uh uh Brady's wife Tom Brady's wife ex-wife yeah but you don't even know her name that's why the Kate models is the
00:09:10
easiest thing I don't know the name right now because my brain is scrambled eggs but what is her name what's Tom Brady's ex-wife Giselle Gisele Bundchen
00:09:15
oh Gizelle bunchen well I hope she's hot with the name like that so
00:09:21
um Jess how how have you been liking the tour it's been amazing I feel like all
00:09:27
right as on the bus it feels like a sleepover every night with two of the funniest people working today who Carlos
00:09:32
and Macomb no no is he set up Carlos is oh my God he's just on my last nerve huh
00:09:38
so you're done with Carlos I mean we still have to keep doing it with him but man I've heard something from from
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Carlos what did you say said that uh Bobby kind of like yelled at him a
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couple times oh I snapped he's getting yelled at yeah yeah he's getting yelled at that's the job I hit him in the head
00:09:54
you you four morning violent with him oh one time oh when he was in the way I heard the story you were trying to go to
00:10:00
the bathroom Bobby comes out every day in his underwear just his underwear yeah and by the way looking real fit these
00:10:06
days looking skinny because we're only eating once a day and I know Carlos was in the walkway now
00:10:12
the walkway on the bus for people that don't know I've never been on this it's extremely small it's maybe like a foot and a half wall to wall it's not big so
00:10:18
you have to skinny through and Carlos was standing there being a Carlos staring at the microwave which is
00:10:24
weird I don't know if he does that every day but he was staring right at the microwave and Bobby couldn't get through he said excuse me and he didn't move
00:10:31
excuse me and he didn't move and I whacked him and he whacked I locked him he smoked him yeah he hit him pretty
00:10:38
hard and juicy was busy staring off into space because that's what she does most of the day and so nobody saw the crime I
00:10:46
did not I didn't even know about this no Carlos has the only bunk that's on a second level too which I think is
00:10:51
hilarious yeah we also we all get into our beds pretty easy he has to like there's no ladder steps it's like a bunk
00:10:59
bed without any stairs does he let down his hair on the side the Rapunzel Rapunzel you does he ever do you ever climb up his hair I see it hanging down
00:11:06
but I'm not touching it and he's improved though I mean he before like in
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the beginning he was lazy yeah I mean yeah real laser no but he's helping us
00:11:17
out a lot but now he's killing it I love him yeah because remember in the beginning he was getting he would get drunk every day and then he would say
00:11:23
crazy things every day yeah like I know he would scream out crazy thing I'm gonna get to say what he said he would
00:11:29
scream out real crazy crazy thing I feel like you are kind of like say it yeah I could say it again
00:11:37
crazy castle thing again right and he would say it and then we'd all be like why'd you say that why would you say that and then we caught Carlos on his
00:11:44
birthday night we celebrated his birthday on the Tour Nashville in in Nash Vegas and I gotta tell you he got
00:11:50
so tanked he was crawling on the floor on the bus I thought that was funny yeah
00:11:55
almost got him fired yeah almost got him fired he you kicked him a little bit I
00:12:00
kicked him as hard as I could you saw him in an Alleyway with a woman he was kissing some girl in an alley in an
00:12:06
alley without any exaggeration yeah against a dumpster against a trash can was pushing not pushing but the girl was
00:12:13
leaning against trash and he was kissing her yeah so what does that say about him yeah she was pretty though she was she
00:12:19
was out of his League I don't know Raya I think Ryan I think
00:12:25
it was Ryan yeah it had to have been yeah but he's been he's been a good little boy helping us so much it's been
00:12:31
wonderful let me talk about the um your episode a little bit you want to talk about my episode I made your little
00:12:38
episode let's talk about it what people don't realize is that Andrew um you know you you see him a movie star
00:12:44
TV star handsome golfs yeah great stand-up cheeseburger Netflix watch it
00:12:51
you know yeah he's got Dynamic confident but there are royal crackers uh also on
00:12:58
Adult Swim and on HBO the next day yeah and then um there's a side of them that
00:13:03
people don't know is he gets depressed very yeah and he gets super sad yeah and
00:13:08
he wants to see Mom Andrew has clinical depression and anxiety yeah yeah so he he's been
00:13:13
diagnosed he's got a tough brain sometimes he sometimes he gets a little low yeah so one morning
00:13:19
um he he wakes up him and Stacy the tour manager wake up around 8 8 30. 7 30
00:13:24
every day yeah me Carlos and McCone wake up at two yeah that's right yeah every
00:13:30
day that's right I'm a wild card yeah you're sometimes in the morning well I got a couple times in the early yeah
00:13:35
because I didn't sleep yeah yeah but my point so one morning we're gonna go to Dollywood Dollywood which is in Pigeon Forge
00:13:43
Tennessee south of Knoxville we get around two let's go Hollywood you know when you go
00:13:49
to Dolly will you screaming you screaming let's [ __ ] do it let's go so we there yep there you are on Sunday
00:14:02
I'm so happy stoked but do you know why I have this face because of what Andrew pulled this is after what Andrew pulled
00:14:09
that's right all right so that's us at the beginning that's us in the beginning now zoom into my eyes you can see something's going something's going on
00:14:16
he's tired he's about to snap he's sad and tired right so we get there and you
00:14:21
know me makone and Carlos are like we gotta eat so we sit down in a restaurant and um
00:14:28
and Andrew just kind of and Stacy go look at us and go why don't we just not sit down and just grab something so we
00:14:34
can just walk around get the day started that's right I got a no man we're eating at this restaurant
00:14:40
say the rest and then I go you do what you you go do what you do you go do your
00:14:45
own thing and we'll for a while you said no I know verbatim let me say my part let me say my PC you can finish I'll let
00:14:52
you finish the story you said you go like this like this with arm signals you go do your own thing and we'll do our
00:14:58
thing okay but time out just say that that's verbatim What you exactly what I said okay but let's read between what
00:15:04
I'm saying no no no no no no I knew it was bad when you said it I wish we had a time machine at that
00:15:09
moment go ahead keep going juice I like it it was earth-shattering you go do your own thing and we'll do our and then
00:15:15
the look in your eyes was like a switch and I was like I hope I see him again
00:15:22
by the way we gotta get you better switch switch sounds let's hear it again that's pretty that's not what they sound like that's not what it's like it's more
00:15:27
like yeah I flip she he flipped the switch all
00:15:33
right so anyway um so I said why don't you go do your own thing for what I meant was while we're
00:15:40
eating go do your own thing after we're done eating we will regroup
00:15:46
you didn't say that though yeah but that's what I meant see this is the problem though when you can when you say
00:15:51
something people are going to take it as you say it so for you to go but I but I was thinking it a different way but that's not how you said it it's like
00:15:57
Hitler no Hitler well Hitler I know he who is totally
00:16:03
miscommunicated yeah yeah he was like let's go get these Jews he was trying to
00:16:08
gather them together to try to form like a crew with the Jews all these other
00:16:13
guys they heard let's go get these you so he may have meant something else poor Hitler it's when gandal this is
00:16:19
basically what Gandalf was like I'm gonna go to Gondor but I'll meet back with you that's what I meant
00:16:27
with the crew later I've never seen Harry Potter it's not Harry Potter Rings man okay so it's so it's basically I'm
00:16:34
saying you go on your little brief Adventure we'll do ours and we will meet and then as we will be the fellowship
00:16:41
once again so what did Andrew do you left the whole [ __ ] Park well for the
00:16:46
listeners I was having an episode so I was very depressed we all have depression by the way nothing wrong with
00:16:52
being depressed if you have depression this is okay you have to deal with moments I had an episode Bobby said
00:16:58
something it triggered me and instead of doing something rude or mean I didn't overreact I didn't yell I didn't fight I
00:17:04
did what my training is which is I walked away instead of starting a fight or being rude I walked away but think
00:17:10
about this hold on let me finish I walked away politely I didn't say a word I just walked away can I finish
00:17:17
I walked away right and so what I did was I called some other people in my life that I wanted to talk to and I said
00:17:24
I'm gonna go ride a few rides by myself so I rode the Wild Eagle by myself
00:17:29
Thunderhead by myself when you get pictures I wish you were pictures I should have gotten solo photos
00:17:35
no but I rode with people next to me there was other singles it was kind of nice and you get to go to the front when you ride single by the way Pro tip just
00:17:40
go single then you go to the front so I wrote on a couple of rides I walked around had a few phone calls with people I wanted to talk to and then I said
00:17:48
I think I'm good and I got an Uber and then I and I went home so I did my little thing and I and I went home okay
00:17:54
actually that's not true I took an Uber back to the to base camp back to the bus
00:17:59
and I said I can either go work out in the gym or I can go get shit-faced at Margaritaville and so I went to Jimmy
00:18:05
Buffett's Margaritaville yeah and I was wasted away again in Margaritaville
00:18:12
looking for my lunch yeah
00:18:17
and I texted you 15 times that day yeah not a return that's right side note
00:18:23
too um while he was taking the Uber he told the Uber drivers right what's the
00:18:29
nearest airport well here's a really good stop I mean let me let me finish let me finish okay
00:18:34
he tells the Uber driver where's the nearest airport we're like oh man I don't know 45 minutes or whatever am I
00:18:40
45 minutes away right so they drop him off hours later we get the same Uber driver because there's only one in
00:18:45
Pigeon forces and the boyfriend and girlfriend ride together I thought the guy when she pulled up in an SUV there
00:18:50
was a guy in the front seat rolled down the window and he says what's up man and I go oh is it for Andrew yeah and I go
00:18:55
are you gonna get are you getting out here thinking she's dropping off a ride he goes nah man it's my baby girl I
00:19:01
gotta stay with her make sure she's safe yeah and I was like oh okay so I got in and then they just sat silently so I
00:19:06
Googled where's an airport because I thought I'm close enough to Chicago I could go see Mom and Dad I haven't seen
00:19:12
my parents in a minute so I said how close there was no flight so I couldn't do it so but when they picked us up they
00:19:18
go hey man your buddy ask where the airport is
00:19:31
yourself no I wanted to know I said is an airport far from here so that yeah they said to your friend we picked up
00:19:36
your friend earlier and I said he was our friend because yeah I was pretty mad at you I felt abandoned I've been about
00:19:42
Abandoned too and then and they got worse for me that night because he wouldn't talk then we went to Alamo yeah
00:19:49
that was crazy yeah that restaurant there's a restaurant steakhouse at Pigeon Forge the
00:19:56
steakhouse alamount steakhouse and the [ __ ] um host who's like an older lady
00:20:03
looks up at me and she goes Harold
00:20:10
white lady but but not in a funny way to get a response I forgot I need a venmo
00:20:15
her that was really amazing yeah and then me and McCone looked at
00:20:21
each other because I thought I first I just you know sometimes I feel like white people just in my imagination are being racist right but they're really
00:20:28
not no but we really are I know yeah but I looked at them I know but I looked at McCown and he gave me a look like
00:20:34
sort of like a a little nod like that just happened no you know what the nod was the nod was
00:20:40
like you know when the the a security guy tells the guy that at the uh death penalty to pull the switch yeah hit it
00:20:47
it's that nod it was like one of those knots so he gave me a nod to go ape [ __ ] right
00:20:55
but I didn't you did not we ate right and then a couple of people recognized me from the restaurant and then the lady
00:21:00
seemed to feel I kept looking at her because I think like this Bobby look at her like this yeah
00:21:08
but it was the most bold race racial thing I've experienced in years but the reason she has to do that is because
00:21:14
there is no funny way to say goodbye well hero is funny but if she tried to
00:21:21
be like go to buyer it wouldn't work yeah it's not like it's not the same right yeah yeah you're right you're
00:21:26
right um but by the way for everyone out there that does want to make a racist sentiment towards somebody like Bobby when you say hero and he leaves say hero
00:21:33
again when he takes off just let it land twice or she could do a bang
00:21:39
or something right but it was like blatantly but you know what the food was okay and um and then I didn't see you
00:21:45
until the next day the next morning because we um so I went out to Margaritaville and got tanked and met up
00:21:51
with some people next to me and just talked had a nice afternoon watch the basketball game which is what I wanted to do I wanted to watch NBA Playoffs and
00:21:58
Stacy came Stacy said can I come uh and have a drink with you because she wanted to say hi I said yeah of course she said
00:22:04
can anybody else come and I said absolutely no and you know who was asking yeah you were I was sure you were
00:22:10
I really wanted to go and I said no thank you I don't wanna I don't want to see anybody today I needed a day cramping up on a bus by the way for
00:22:17
people that don't know it's anxiety inducing you're on a bus all day all night with people and it's constant so
00:22:22
two weeks straight it's all you're seeing is the same people so it was just like a Breaking Point and also you know
00:22:28
I was a little like I had some stuff in my mind and I was Heavy with some [ __ ] so I just wanted to take a break and I
00:22:33
got drunk and then Stacy and I went and we played um we went to an arcade and it
00:22:39
was closed and they let us play for like two hours and we were throwing the things at the clowns and we played
00:22:45
we played Jurassic Park but they all the guns we had so much fun so nice and we drove uh cruising USA or whatever
00:22:52
whatever the new one is so we we partied then I got back to the bus slept like a baby the next morning
00:23:00
um we said hello very calmly I I didn't even know you were mad at me I wasn't mad I didn't even know why you'd behaved
00:23:07
the way you did but this is a correction let's we're talking about live on air I wasn't mad but I needed to take some
00:23:12
space so I did okay but I I but that was okay that's fine and then how do we Rectify it for people that want to know
00:23:18
the truth about why Bob and I are are very very very very best friends truly on stage that night we didn't talk about
00:23:25
it all day we didn't we just went about our day and then on stage somebody asked
00:23:30
something in the Q a somebody said something to the effect of who's a better stand-up or who's funnier
00:23:36
who's a whatever and they were inciting Bobby to say something funny and take a shot at me but instead Bobby says why
00:23:43
would I say that about Andrew he's my best friend I love him and I gave him a big hug and a kiss and we both knew it's
00:23:50
all good Harold Babble if you have an upcoming summer
00:23:56
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00:24:03
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00:24:20
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00:24:38
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00:24:43
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00:25:12
know what we hit so many cities you don't remember them you're just you know I thought Nashville was a great one did
00:25:19
we play the Ryman of the grand old operators awesome that was cool everyone came out we made up a song about Kid
00:25:25
Rock that night we shouted out Kid Rock yeah we also you know there were some we had some really really good night some
00:25:30
really fun you guys missed you guys didn't go to Graceland which is insane to me I went
00:25:36
they didn't I slept I can't believe you didn't want to see Elvis's crib dude you saw they
00:25:42
showed you the toilet that he died on and there's a there was a guy on there who reenacts it did he really die on a
00:25:48
toilet you press a button and a guy kind of like a dunk tank you know what the clown yeah you press a button and he has a peanut butter and banana sandwich
00:25:56
and he falls in the exact way that Elvis felt was he on drugs I mean I don't know exactly yeah yeah he was raw on drugs he
00:26:04
had like 850 pounds of [ __ ] inside of him or something like that oh look it up though he had like tons and tons of red
00:26:10
meat like jammed and Jarred in his body or something weird like that they they when they presented on tour we had a private tour this young girl he gave us
00:26:17
a private tour which was awesome yeah but they paint it in such a different picture they're like well Elvis took a
00:26:22
sleeping pill
00:26:36
bathroom he was rushed to the hospital pronounced that yeah they don't paint it that way they actually painted that he
00:26:42
was one pill they gave him the pills because he was serving our country because he was serving the country the
00:26:47
great nation wow so they say the way they say it is what happened was is he was taking pills to go to sleep but he
00:26:53
was also taking pills to stay awake right and so he was taking all those
00:26:59
pills uh toxicology report uh Elvis's blood was found to have extremely high levels of opiates to Dilaudid Perkin and
00:27:06
dermerol codeine and Quaaludes yeah this is the guy was a [ __ ] walking Pharmacy holy [ __ ] by the way they have
00:27:12
a pharmacy where the barn is now I mean when you have money and you're on drugs it sucks
00:27:17
well I mean it's convenient no no because I remember when I was on bad TV and I relapsed and you know we made four
00:27:25
thousand dollars a week on that show which is for a baroque comedian yeah for
00:27:31
regular people regular people but I remember six months in I asked Ari shaffir for money you did
00:27:40
yeah because I had no money because I used it all on drugs wow Jesus yeah yeah did you have to like how you know
00:27:45
somebody told me Melanie's new special he had said that he told his business manager don't give me don't let me
00:27:51
withdraw cash from the account and he said which is a terrible idea for a drug addict because then you're gonna find a
00:27:56
different way to get money yeah because he's like this will cut off my access but of course he would buy a Rolex on a credit card
00:28:02
for like 12 Grand and then sell it for like six at a pawn shop wow so just lose six grand just we could have six grand cash or whatever wow to go spend on it's
00:28:09
insane yeah you do stuff like that well that's what that's what but but Elvis didn't need to
00:28:18
it's probably easier to get back then a hunka hunk of Dilaudid love anyway shout
00:28:25
out to the king but honestly we took the tour and it it was it was so sad
00:28:31
because the house was cool at the beginning yeah the way it was decorated was cool it was cool then you go through
00:28:37
it then you start to realize this is so weird and sad it's someone's house it's a dead guy's house and they kept
00:28:43
everything it's exactly the way that's how the photos yeah they showed me the
00:28:48
photos and it looked great yeah like each room was like stylistic beautiful beautiful yeah yeah but unfortunately at
00:28:54
the very end they show you like his last place he played I guess he couldn't go to bed because he was Juiced up out of his mind when he got home from a dentist
00:29:00
appointment he went and got a dentist appointment at 10 30 at night because that's the only time he would go so people wouldn't bug him so he goes to
00:29:07
the dentist appointment when he comes home there's one photo that's on the internet that was taken by a fan his last remaining photo and he's driving
00:29:12
through his gates at Graceland he's like waving them they must have been there at two in the morning he goes he can't sleep he calls one of
00:29:19
his buddies says come come play rugged ball yeah she's a racquetball court yeah in the back of his house by the way
00:29:25
the racquetball court yeah cost him 200 Grand the house only cost him like 140 I paid more for the racquetball court that's it right there that's the last
00:29:31
remaining photo right there is the last photo of Elvis no no the second one sorry the second one right there the stat number two that you see right there
00:29:37
that's the last last photo of him alive so he was pulling into the gates he goes and plays racquetball with his buddy
00:29:43
sits down plays piano they have the piano the last thing he played and they
00:29:48
play it through the speakers when you walk and he plays that says goodbye to his
00:29:53
friend goes into the house I think the dentist did it
00:29:58
see this is this is good it was the dentist yep in the [ __ ] yeah yeah
00:30:04
yeah maybe he should have been in L.A if you maybe it would have lived how where's my
00:30:11
yoga mat
00:30:17
right and you know I mean I think it would be more new agey could somebody get me a ginger shot
00:30:24
don't you think that he would live maybe you think if he lived in a healthier you know what I'm not gonna lie when you're because we've been out there it's you're
00:30:30
out there yeah we're in the woods you're in the woods not only that you're you're very correct the the food
00:30:37
it's a fried Twinkie they tried they told you what he they showed us his kitchen he was the first person in in uh
00:30:44
the country right in the country no no the first person in the state of uh Tennessee to have a microwave at the
00:30:50
time and they might what did the microwave cost it was like five grand yeah dude it was hilarious and it was
00:30:55
the size of this desk it was huge and so then they said his favorite meals yeah
00:31:01
were all deep fried he never not ate deep fried [ __ ] yeah definitely not
00:31:06
exactly I know you're right I'm agreeing with you yeah yeah here's how you knew the diets
00:31:12
were bad juicy and I tried to look up somewhere to go get a snack and so there was a health food place up the street yeah but every meal was served with
00:31:19
ranch uh every meal yeah even the smoothies smoothie head Ranch on it yeah yeah they give you a little ranch shot a little
00:31:25
sidecar ranch when you get a smoothie yeah so you could tell it was really bad and also Graceland the neighborhood yikes
00:31:31
yeah I remember the guy at the Sound Stage was like Lenny he was like Lenny yeah oh you guys are thinking about leaving the park Y'all Gonna Leave
00:31:38
Graceland and we were like we're just gonna take a walk up the street and he's like I don't know man I swear to God I swear to God really
00:31:46
like it's a it's a half a mile up the road it's just by the CVS it's like a yeah he goes well I guess it is daytime
00:31:56
yeah and I was like you don't have to hold on my shirt we're walking right next to each other yeah it was cute
00:32:10
so at Pigeon Fork had a trump store that was probably like 5 000 square feet of all trumpets it was closed so we went to
00:32:18
a t-shirt shop that had Trump stuff too remember that's why I thought it was the Trump store because they had so much
00:32:23
Trump stuff they had a lot of trump but did you notice on all we went to a couple of stores they're all owned by
00:32:29
minorities yeah I noticed that too like black people the Trump store was owned by a black guy I went there before you guys got to go there wow the black guy
00:32:35
was in there yeah I swear to God yeah yeah but and also the reason that we got attracted to it or even noticed it was
00:32:43
because we were at breakfast Stacy and I and she goes look at that guy's shirt and this guy was wearing
00:32:48
it didn't look like a shirt it looked like a cape a Confederate flag half Confederate flag half American flag Cape
00:32:54
that's what the blackout the blackout was wearing no there's a white guy on the street but I looked at it and I was
00:33:00
like where where the [ __ ] is that from and then she's like there's a trump store right right there right and I was
00:33:06
like no [ __ ] what was the black guy dressed like um well he didn't have any clothes on
00:33:12
he was like I'm wearing this [ __ ] yeah no he would honestly it was really kind of he was just a T-shirt and jeans but I
00:33:18
it a piece of me thought does he own this store or does he work in here but then I thought he must own this because
00:33:24
he wouldn't want to take this job if he I don't know man but he but he probably
00:33:29
wears like a red white and blue like button up but there's underneath yeah yeah he's probably like a closeted you
00:33:37
know what I mean closet BLM yeah but he has to wear the car but let me say this all joking aside
00:33:43
The South was filled with wonderful wonderful amazing fans of people that we loved and it was it was awesome to see
00:33:49
everyone it was amazing dude also something I want to say that's when we were in Dollywood you know 15
00:33:57
years ago man if I went to Dollywood man they wouldn't let you in back then you
00:34:02
couldn't bring an angel recognize so it was like the love that I
00:34:07
felt in Dollywood I was just like oh we're reaching everywhere everywhere people would come in on the roller
00:34:13
coaster you know the cart comes in and we're waiting next to get on and they'd pull up like and they'd see Bobby that's awesome it
00:34:20
was great I was just like wow this is the power of our show this is how you know we're in a good place the cop when
00:34:25
we walked in was like I remember that you guys I love bad friends man oh yeah right when we walked away we took a
00:34:30
picture with the cop and he goes whatever you guys need I love on that when they say that well when he said that I got nervous I didn't like it I
00:34:36
didn't like it no it was we had a really good time down there in the South and and also in in the great Midwest Detroit
00:34:42
showed up like crazy the craziest thing we're not even saying we're forgetting so much because there's so much that happened
00:34:48
uh dude got in game a dude proposed to his wife in Atlanta oh yeah oh a guy at
00:34:54
the second show in Atlanta came up to Carlos and says hey can I propose to my wife and Carlos was like are you full of [ __ ]
00:35:01
because sometimes you have people that are full of [ __ ] that just want to get on stage like the surgeon oh yeah I wanted didn't you want her to say no I'm
00:35:07
so bad I so badly dude how I would have been in your face of that guy it had been so funny in your [ __ ]
00:35:13
[Laughter] crazy dude she's he bent down on one knee and he
00:35:19
was shaking visibly shaking so much I mean like this like trembling yeah and
00:35:25
he pulled up the ring and she was bawling and it was nuts she got married they got engaged in the bathroom yes
00:35:31
because of the pressure of the crowd probably yeah that's why he did my car rides like I was just joking you know he's like well baby
00:35:39
I love you she's like I like you just fine but don't do that at bad friends it's funny that people because we would
00:35:45
have people come on the stage and they would get nervous a little bit yeah yeah yeah I found that to be cute it was cute
00:35:51
we had a couple of weird instances somebody brought their kid twice oh my God I thought I brought like a 14 year
00:35:56
old boy which was like that's a little young yeah 11 year old girls and 11 year old girl her dad came to the show it was
00:36:03
so weird it was very weird oh I could also say did you guys know but thanks for being fans yeah yeah I should say we
00:36:09
also learned that if you show the inside of your [ __ ] [Music]
00:36:14
it's a ten thousand dollar fine did you know that fancy are you broke I we had the Bang Yeah
00:36:21
Andrew was wearing the shirt of a woman a woman I make I made Bobby take his
00:36:28
shirt off and give it away one show oh my God his favorite his favorite shirt he loves it I was in the worst mood and
00:36:34
then a girl uh a woman who is well endowed that's a nice way of saying it in her chest in her chest
00:36:41
thank you for the clarification I said I want your shirt Andrew and I said well
00:36:47
get up here and I take off my shirt only to be fair to Bobby and she goes you got to wear my [ __ ] and I was like your tits
00:36:54
are way bigger than that and she goes too bad so I switch shirts but it's a crop top right so I'm wearing a crop top
00:37:01
to end the show it but you snug but I we it fits me super snug and then so that show ends I don't have a shirt we're
00:37:07
backstage saying hi to some people the tour manager Stacy calls us into the office like the principal's office and
00:37:14
Bobby and I like children with our Tails tucked between our legs go to apologize I didn't know what I did at that point
00:37:19
Bobby is begging for forgiveness for showing the inside of his [ __ ] I'm wearing a woman's crop top glitter
00:37:25
T-shirt with a turtleneck tight so yeah and I go to the guy I get the the
00:37:31
manager or whatever right yeah yeah and I go I didn't I didn't know that you can't you couldn't show the inside of
00:37:37
your [ __ ] and you looked at me goes you know okay I did know you go I didn't
00:37:42
I thought you said don't show penis I didn't know penis and butthole were the same thing and he goes they're the same thing and then we all wanted to make a
00:37:50
joke so bad well because fundamentally no they're not they're not the same they're absolutely not the same a penis
00:37:56
and a butthole are not the same thing one of them poops and the other one is your bottle okay yeah it was so
00:38:02
obviously that this is not the same thing and when he said that all of us looked around like don't do it yeah we
00:38:08
had to beg this guy very and thank you to him thank you because he was like I'm gonna clip you guys 10 grand and we were
00:38:14
like please please don't do that because we're gonna do this a lot more on the job also ass is okay as a whole 10 grand
00:38:23
10 grand that's insane to me that's more than any prostitute Bobby goes I don't understand I've been completely naked
00:38:30
climbing up walls and comedy clubs across the country did I say that we did the math backstage
00:38:37
you would be the most expensive escort in Atlanta
00:38:43
just to show your butthole but is that even my fault it's your fault yes it was yes it would tell people Bob's gonna
00:38:50
show the butthole I don't say that okay I do it Tang this is how I do it I say
00:38:56
you guys love Bobby you love Bobby's butt yeah you want to
00:39:01
see it you want to really see it Bob give them what they want and you
00:39:07
don't have to spread it but you do you spread it let me ask you you as a comedian though no don't let course the
00:39:16
buttholes funny you have to show the hole the hole's funny yes chuckle chuckle you wore underwear with your
00:39:22
butthole imprinted on it
00:39:27
yeah I bet
00:39:32
and then we had a fun night let me talk about one more night before we get into anything else
00:39:38
we had a wild night in Louisville Kentucky oh my God what happened there
00:39:44
was no food right yeah yeah so we go traipsing around trying to find something there was one place there well
00:39:50
hold on and we're gonna get there I don't remember we go to TGI Fridays oh
00:39:55
yeah I remember I remember I remember we've never none of us have I've never been to a TGI Friday I've been to a Chile I've never been one do we either
00:40:01
I've never been I've been yeah we know we know we know uh Chandler Arizona or
00:40:07
whatever yeah uh we so I remember so so Bob and I said well it's the only thing open I've actually never been to one I've been there so how do I order wait
00:40:13
wait wait also it's Carlos's birthday yeah Carlos's birthday but also when I order how do I order it these are Bobby
00:40:19
orders Hi how are you oh good so on the appetizer front for the table we'll take ever everything you guys to have
00:40:26
you know Mickey Mouse and uh that what's Fantasia yeah when he's behaving the magic wands yeah everything comes select
00:40:32
that's how Bobby ordered he 100 without any semblance of exaggeration whether it's a steakhouse or TGI why do I do that because this is your drug and you
00:40:39
can't use drugs that's not why that's what you said that's what you said I know that's what I said but that's not why you do you said I'm a drug addict
00:40:44
and I can't use drugs that's not why that's not why that's not why that's what you said no no I'll tell you why why be because I've never been there
00:40:51
before so some of it's not good you gotta try all sure so if you get six of
00:40:56
them if four of them are bad you you leave the four you eat the two right right so that's why I do it the odds of
00:41:03
getting a good appetizer versus a bad one it's kind of like what we showed our down Center mods before
00:41:09
it's one and you know it's one in a couple thousand one in seven hundred appetizers might not be stop it but not
00:41:17
at teacher all right so so teachers yeah we order Bobby orders um dumplings crazy
00:41:23
no I I like the dumplings you order the dump a rose I didn't want them chips and
00:41:28
salsa chips and guac uh uh french fries french fries mozzarella sticks no pretzel sticks pretzel pretzel bread
00:41:35
anyway 15 things before we even get to the meal yeah the young woman that's working there and this is no [ __ ] on
00:41:40
anybody that's working there they were all very nice and polite they bring the chips over we start to snack the chips
00:41:45
are right next to me now I hear [Music] and it's not me farting and I thought it
00:41:52
was him farting it wasn't before yeah and I hear it and I actually you look at
00:41:57
me and I still go yeah I hear it too I go am I crazy I I looked at your hands because I go are you moving something on
00:42:03
the table and you go I what is that and I go what the [ __ ] I lift up the chip
00:42:08
basket and underneath the chips is a living huge living fly it was this I'm
00:42:15
not kidding it was you [ __ ] huge yeah and it was on his side going kill me
00:42:21
kill me no no it was basically I ate some of the chips all right I'm taking a
00:42:26
nap I'm supposed to be in the guacamole yeah so we immediately go Oh [ __ ] this
00:42:31
[ __ ] I'm not eat this is insane it just turns off every meal oh come on I don't want to eat I go we gotta get out of here this is I'm not if that's there if
00:42:38
that's in the chips what's in the food what's in the burger yeah yeah that's you don't even see what goes in there
00:42:43
yeah yeah so we say to the woman politely I think we're gonna pay for what we've got and then leave and she
00:42:49
was like oh yeah and we're like there's a fly here and we show them they see it and the manager too the manager sees it
00:42:54
yeah there's a fly is that all right well pay up
00:43:07
and we walked out so then we said what's going to be open this is okay this is gonna make me so mad love it so nothing
00:43:14
is open this is this story I remember this story the cop as we're walking South we see that there's a McDonald's
00:43:21
I said let's go to McDonald's Bobby walks at the pace of an 84 year old with a walker
00:43:30
without tennis balls but you look like you're a skiing I walk like a kid from that I walk like a guy
00:43:37
with a destination I want to get there no there's like a medal involved with you yeah I mean you got to get the gold
00:43:43
you know what I wanted yeah golden [ __ ] arches yeah but what happens I got to the window and the walk-up window
00:43:49
was open and when I got there he goes we're closed I go well can I put an order right now and he goes you got to
00:43:55
do it right now and I'm and I go you guys you got I'm yelling I'm calling you guys you guys we got to order now we ran
00:44:00
they started running and then the manager comes out and he goes too late and close the window yep and now I'm
00:44:06
like damn you [ __ ] turtles if you could have just been a rabbit today that's not it but then I said [ __ ] it
00:44:14
there's Taco Bell let's just put something in our body because we hadn't eaten all day we walked to Taco Bell
00:44:19
drive through only the inside is closed and Bobby goes there's a [ __ ] inside his clothes [ __ ] this he throws a
00:44:25
tantrum and walks away and I go just wait we'll ask someone in a car to get us to pay for no I saw the guy well then
00:44:31
the guy pulled out the guy pulled up after you freaked out as you were freaking out there was a plane going over and I go just wait just wait and
00:44:38
jet ski like a child mom and dad are fighting and she's just saying I don't know who to go with and I said well get
00:44:44
out of here I'm gonna wait to eat a guy no you did it you said order something and I said I will go with Bobby you'll
00:44:49
go with Bobby right yeah stupid girl because we well it ended up being fine so then but guy pulls up in a scooter oh
00:44:58
it was dying as it pulled up Polly would say he's crusty bro and I said
00:45:04
hey man I'd like to get something to eat can I put my order with your order and he goes
00:45:10
uh okay and I said I'll just buy your taco I'll just buy your Taco Bell I was gonna buy
00:45:16
and he goes I was fixing to order me about 20 tacos
00:45:22
and I was like look at you you were gonna order 20 tacos
00:45:27
and he goes yeah I was fixing to get me about 20 and I was like order 20 [ __ ] tacos
00:45:34
he orders the 20 tacos me and Carlos get our two tacos or whatever you pull up to the window I pay at Taco Bell by the way
00:45:40
20 24 tacos for those that want to know nineteen dollars
00:45:46
I swear to God so I was like okay didn't break the bank so we pay and we're walking back and
00:45:51
we're eating and Bobby and jet ski walked away without having Taco Bell
00:45:56
instead doordashed White Castle at four in the morning yep and had some
00:46:02
sliders so it worked out I had other things go it wasn't because of the I hadn't eaten all day okay I other things on my mind
00:46:09
so what happened things what happened was a Dollywood to you you had a little Dollywood then yeah you did have a
00:46:15
Dollywood but I went with him that's right you did you know your sister's a little sweetheart no you know what it is when we were kids we called it a kiss
00:46:22
ass oh really I love you guys so much
00:46:27
you've been very like you know you you know I I I'm a negative guy no you're not
00:46:33
you're not no I go through negativity in my mind you go through phases phases of negativity and when I'm in those phases
00:46:38
you're very good at like being there's not a bad bone in your body you looked
00:46:43
at me and you go get that Taco Bell yeah yeah I did that right like I was like
00:46:49
the dog and all the yellow and you know what that dog did she put her up put her head down put her eyes up
00:46:54
and just kept walking behind you yeah you're a sweetie we had a long walk in silence but I felt like it felt like
00:47:00
good to be there next to you yeah because I could tell you were going through something no one no one walked next to me when I was going through it
00:47:06
yeah I had my Dollywood you have to you have to yeah you got to
00:47:11
go sometimes I also want to so we both had a Dollywood yeah and I also I was I looked through life sometimes in your
00:47:18
lens the way you see it yeah and it makes me grateful because a lot of times you know you know we've been at it for a
00:47:25
long time and they're just you know we just get hung up on things you know and when I look at you and how positive you
00:47:32
are it just I just think it without you on the tour it would be way harder way
00:47:38
harder I agree likewise oh there would be notes yeah that's right
00:47:45
yeah that's right the funniest way I gotta say of that night when you go we got the White Castle and Carlos is the
00:47:51
one who ordered it and picked it up and then I kind of just remembered that whole night was his birthday yeah
00:47:59
it really was and oh you know the best part was they lost one of his tacos yeah really yeah and I was like do you
00:48:06
want mine and he's like it's okay I forgot another really cool thing cool thing uh Adam Sandler was in town
00:48:12
yeah you guys probably a lot to talk about that but after I found out Bobby and I went to visit the comedy
00:48:18
club in town yeah and their Open Mic had just ended but it was you could just tell how much it not only meant to them
00:48:24
but like the local Comics were just like whoa you're here on the walk back because the lights on yeah he's turned
00:48:31
the lights on he turned all the lights on I went on stage just feel out the room it was a cool night it was good
00:48:36
like for their comedy scene and then everyone in town getting out of the Adam Sandler Show we're just like they just saw Adam and then Bobby's now just
00:48:43
walking in the street and they people couldn't believe it but also another thing we did have dinner with Sandler
00:48:48
yeah we went to go see after Sandler played the uh where the Red Wings play in Detroit we the show got out and I
00:48:57
said uh you know we were but Mike binder was there opening and Schneider was there and Kevin James and they invited us back
00:49:03
to a cigar bar uh Lounge where you eat steak and smoke cigars at the same time which
00:49:09
for the record don't know why you won I mean they were little like and then
00:49:15
why do you want to eat a cigar steak but they but they're very pleasant to let us hang out with them and Sandler we went
00:49:22
to go see the show um and Sandler and those guys uh that was the dinner actually beforehand uh
00:49:28
but we had a Sandler let us hang out with them we were talking he was so sweet he's the best and he came up and
00:49:34
gave Bobby a very very warm hug and it was really really to see yeah and Schneider was there we then we had
00:49:40
coffee with Snyder the next day I think yeah Schneider was walking around that was not us for coffee and hung out and it's been an unbelievable tour and what
00:49:47
I do want to say is honestly from the bottom of our heart thank you it's been a life-changing thing we've it's been so
00:49:53
fun to meet the fans the fan art has been wait till you see the studio is gonna be filled when they ship it back
00:49:58
to us because it's in the bus so much fan art so much fan love you know we had a guy give Bobby a sobriety coin oh my
00:50:06
God you were like a 16-year sobriety Corner huge and you were gifted and you were gifted with what is considerably
00:50:12
like a key to the city a councilman got a a coin from the city and you were gifted that yeah it was just stuff like
00:50:18
that was like and people saying to us that we've helped you guys in tough times I know is a good joke show it's a
00:50:23
comedy show we have fun and we usually [ __ ] around but from the bottom of my heart it means so much to us that you
00:50:29
guys are like but they dude it gets me through Monday it gets me through my week or it's [ __ ] awesome but they have saved me as well and um
00:50:37
you know I've had a tough one and just to see people like look at me and go I love you and you
00:50:44
know I mean it just it goes it just goes a long way with me well we're trying to give back we try to help out some of the
00:50:49
fans if you [ __ ] their dicks what no we're not sucking anybody and we're not
00:50:54
going to talk about nobody llama stuff why can't we talk about it okay so now you're gonna keep doing it I'm not gonna stop I might have to stop no I thought
00:51:02
you said that you're not ever gonna I want to stop so for those that don't know the Dalai Lama you bring up the photo
00:51:07
the Dalai Lama sucked the tongue of like an eight-year-old boy the first week that we were on tour and it went viral the boy sucked his tongue hey man let's
00:51:14
get it right the Dalai Lama doesn't suck on tongues but look he's kissing the boy's tongue
00:51:19
so anyway this is disgusting and insane that's insane and and we coined it or
00:51:24
juicy coined it the Bobby llama because now we invite people on stage to kiss Bobby's tongue of course these are of
00:51:30
age adults sucking on his tongue yeah but what's happening is I'm getting sick sick oh
00:51:36
yeah every show I get a sore throat vitamin C yeah and it's not it's not healthy we've increased our budget for
00:51:42
vitamin shots yeah and also one show I did six times or something six or seven yeah it was terrible yeah always the one
00:51:48
who brings it up and it's you always have the power to choose and there's these like really attractive women who
00:51:53
are dying to get a kiss because I don't know it's funnier with a guy
00:51:59
creepy right so it's like all right Jim come up here I arrived let me suck your
00:52:05
tongue the amount of guys that have volunteered to suck your tongue is
00:52:10
beautiful I'm happy people are living so free out there what tower Wheels amen
00:52:15
wrong part of town for that [ __ ] what was he saying he said uh none uh Atlanta right he was no no no no no no it was
00:52:22
Charlotte yeah he goes we don't do that gay [ __ ] here yeah and I was like yeah you do four guys just asked to do it I
00:52:30
was like what are you talking about you idiot yeah and then of course some guy got up moments later and Bobby Bobby Lambda Bobby Lomita yeah it's been it's
00:52:38
been great that that stuff has been so much fun for people to like be interactive with the show and I can't
00:52:44
wait for uh us to continue the tour we're in the middle of it right now so it's good to like keep moving along and and seeing new cities and all that stuff
00:52:51
yeah thanks come out guys it's been great it's been great it's been really great Juicy's expanding her her stand-up
00:52:58
resume we're trying to write new stuff on the road and we're opening with a bunch of new stuff for people that don't know by the way I think people are a
00:53:03
little confused we never preface this we're both doing stand-up juicy does stand up so you're getting an hour of stand up up top and then we're doing
00:53:10
stuff from the show so what's great is you could stand up and you get parts of the show it's a two-hour show you're singing there's a lot of things a lot of
00:53:16
singing there's a lot of fun man a lot of fun a lot of a lot of fun to be had yeah anyway I want to complain about
00:53:22
something off the show off the tour stuff that shocks me I'm gonna book a hotel for the end of
00:53:27
the tour when I stay an extra day you know before I come back home in what town in Phoenix okay but
00:53:34
I look online one price I call different price I go on an app
00:53:40
different price around the same time I'm on my computer at my house an ad for Trivago comes on you know the whatever
00:53:47
that is yeah and then they do a commercial where it's like Janie stated a hotel and paid 275.
00:53:53
Marissa only paid 186 and it's like why is that legal why the [ __ ] can she have
00:54:01
the same room and get one girl just got [ __ ] so it's like why does one person pay one shouldn't rooms be the same
00:54:06
price for everybody some of these apps and and these places have deals I don't like it I know you don't so then you're
00:54:12
somebody gets F inevitably somebody gets ripped off I'm opening up a hotel where here's the deal first floor everything's the same price
00:54:19
second floor same price third floor same price fourth same price so the first floor 150 two second floor 250 third 350
00:54:28
every room so you know and what floor am I on what do I what's the hotel called Cheapo people Cheapo people welcome to
00:54:34
Cheapo people Hotel all right so cheap let me ask you oh so Cheapo people right what's what if it's a Seasonal Hotel
00:54:40
yeah right so in some parts of the Year packed right but there's some off you
00:54:46
know off seasons and then you I gotta fill your rooms but they should all be the same
00:54:52
I know what fancy just did I just saw what you just did and let me tell me you want to talk about this because I actually do want to talk about it
00:54:58
sometimes we'll have people say to us how come this ticket price or this ticket price is so expensive we set the
00:55:05
ticket price to One Price what happens is third-party sharks and and [ __ ]
00:55:11
overcharged they buy tickets they resell them it's [ __ ] up we have no control of that our price was is 39.95 for most
00:55:19
seats at most venues forty dollars what happens is the machine in the algorithm does that without our consent and our
00:55:26
control we have no control over so when we say this is a tip for the fans for real when when an artist goes please use
00:55:34
the artist code for the pre-sale like when we go on sale the pre-sale that's when you can get a locked price no
00:55:40
matter what when it's off the pre-sale we can't control it anymore it sucks yeah and the US is legal in Europe it's
00:55:46
illegal it should be illegal so the versus Princeton uh is now in in Spain France doing the tour yeah yeah tickets
00:55:54
are like whatever 40 70 people were paying five thousand dollars in the US but this depend
00:56:00
crazy and and again oh yeah and you're doing this don't get that money
00:56:05
that doesn't go to us it's not like our fulfilling our pockets when someone else rips you off like that's what bums us
00:56:12
out is like I hate when fans are like oh man they're all sold out who do you guys think you are charging that it's like we
00:56:17
don't charge that dude that's some machine that someone is reselling and there's third-party machines so my point back to the hotel is that [ __ ] should be
00:56:24
[ __ ] regulated yep it shouldn't do that one person shouldn't be [ __ ] because someone else gets something
00:56:29
that's just what you need with your schedule Andrew a hotel business well first of all now you just lost
00:56:36
yourself an executive position at Cheapo people hotels listen Bobby you're obviously my co-exact thank you but can
00:56:43
I say something fancy your housekeeping it's not clearly I don't know why you're so angry about it because here's why
00:56:49
because if it's 200 or 150 who gives a [ __ ] what do you mean because someone shouldn't pay more than the other person
00:56:55
paid that's not fair we don't live in communism well we should I mean what I'm
00:57:01
saying is is that I just said right specifically to you why do you care it bothered me because because I've done
00:57:08
this thing before where I've paid one thing for something and then found out that I could have gotten it cheaper another way and you're like well that's
00:57:14
[ __ ] [ __ ] it's principle but I just got ripped so I just got [ __ ] and then I realize you're very principled
00:57:20
when it comes to money well because it's not because I know I'm just saying you are you really are you're very like you
00:57:25
have your books you mean you know what people are getting you want to be fair I like fairness when it comes to finance
00:57:31
yeah yeah because I think societally we have a lot of up things in our society that are unfair it shouldn't it
00:57:37
shouldn't cost you 10 grand to go to the [ __ ] hospital it's like we have so much [ __ ] up [ __ ] in our country where you're like this is why people get mad
00:57:43
about it because the average person does get [ __ ] because someone wants to come to our show and reselling machines have
00:57:49
[ __ ] someone and so they're like 400 I can't pay for that it's like well I I wish I could change that how could I do
00:57:56
that but if we were to go into Dollywood and they said hey man you can be in front of the line if you can be two grand let's let's suppose that was a
00:58:02
thing you did do the fast pass I know we did we did do it you did it we didn't need it it's elitism but what I know but
00:58:08
when is that wrong getting a fast pass no these are two different things you're talking about why because because there is a set
00:58:13
general admission means you wait in a line right you're paying extra to go to a different line to go early that's
00:58:20
unfortunately the system that we all know exists right with hotels all the [ __ ] it's like I don't [ __ ] it they just hide it you don't know same thing with
00:58:26
an airplane her seat right next to me could cost cost her 80 bucks less than mine why
00:58:32
should I got Trivago anyway this is an ad for Trivago no it just here's the thing I I know how
00:58:38
capitalism works I just think like there's moments like that where the commercial makes mad they're bragging about it that it's like
00:58:44
cheaper it's like well why did that girl get out of Virginia that's not right if you think about McDonald's if you paid
00:58:50
you know a 295 for a big man I don't know how much they cost and I paid eight dollars yeah you'd be [ __ ] livid it's
00:58:57
the same shitty cheeseburger yeah why didn't we pay the same thing so I'm opening up Cheapo people Hotel yeah first floor 150 a night second floor 250
00:59:03
350 450 Penthouse is eight grand
00:59:09
oh my God and by the way my math just worked out because if the top guy is willing like the fast pass idiot if he's
00:59:15
willing to supplement the other ticket loss like the loss of Revenue that I could be getting then I'm fine with it
00:59:21
because you're dumb enough to pay for it so it's fine no no no no what's going on what happened in in
00:59:27
Raleigh was nice I said let's book a hotel so we went to a baseball game yes so fun and I said I need to book a hotel
00:59:33
last minute we book a hotel his is already pre-booked I go to the hotel front desk I go hi
00:59:39
it's Raleigh on a Thursday you gotta have a room I
00:59:46
I mean that's not what I said but obviously I thought interesting though that was the
00:59:52
first time where I was responsible enough to get one before you and let's be honest you didn't get it somebody else did no but I but two days before I
00:59:59
called your manager no no my you texted yourself my assistant I'm just saying I was still mindful
01:00:05
about it I went correct just in case we're about to hit Raleigh get me a hotel room right right right and get me
01:00:11
the most expensive one because I didn't want you to get the most expensive one I wouldn't have I know but still it would
01:00:16
have hurt me she I would have gone to Cheapo people hotels.com what I did was so I walked into Raleigh and I thought
01:00:21
by the way there's a million hotels in the city so I thought I'll get something who cares I walk in with him and I said this would be nice can I stay here and
01:00:27
the woman goes totally booked out and I was like yeah I remember seriously yeah and she
01:00:33
goes totally booked I was like it's Wednesday night in Raleigh North Carolina yeah in the middle of [ __ ]
01:00:38
spring I was like what the [ __ ] and she's like yeah no totally buck and I go okay I'll see you later Bob I'm gonna go
01:00:44
get a hotel up the street I got a hotel anyway then he goes I go let's go get dinner he goes you got to see my [ __ ]
01:00:50
room go upstairs yeah it's the entire Fancy look at me the whole sixth floor has one
01:00:59
room it's his of my room and you know what his patio is it's the restaurant yeah when he walks outside there's no
01:01:06
they cut out half the restaurant's patio and it's yours and made up my patio they put like some blankets over a gate so
01:01:12
they can't see him the patio his just his patio not downtown the Patty was bigger than our entire Studio then all
01:01:18
the rooms combined can I tell you something yeah that's only a restaurant it's a club it's a night two in the morning [Laughter]
01:01:25
it's [ __ ] payoff also could I see another thing right my bedroom has 52
01:01:30
it's a [ __ ] shirt it's got 52 Windows all right so at 5 30 in the morning right God shoots his lights in let's
01:01:38
wake Bob up shoot the lights it wasn't worth the 1500 [ __ ] dollars
01:01:43
I paid for two nights in that [ __ ] thing I'd rather be in a [ __ ] dungeon with you it was a rip-off and [ __ ] you
01:01:49
should have gone to Cheapo people hotels.com it was a nightmare it backfired it he went and slept on the
01:01:55
bus I slept on the bus because I was like did the light what's so funny man they're like so bright in there I go
01:02:01
like there should be no windows in the bedroom should be none none none you
01:02:07
don't need one because I have different rooms right here's a tip Cheapo people Hotel we're gonna buy old jails wait a
01:02:12
second like this is something that gets me so mad about the US the a if you go to Europe especially if you go to Spain
01:02:19
for example every window every house doesn't matter where you are has shutters so there's no light coming
01:02:25
inside any room if you don't want to die anywhere they have shutters too man no
01:02:30
here in the US everything is he's talking about slats like they they go completely flat yes every single window
01:02:37
on every single house oh [ __ ] Google shutter dude well you
01:02:44
know you dude you they have the window Boop they close you I don't want one of those it's like an army you know it's like a military because when you do
01:02:50
drapes the sides yeah seeps the lights of course they do yeah I don't like it you know that's why I travel with a
01:02:56
stapler tick Ed always you know what I do I took
01:03:02
heavy things around the room and push them against this yes I've done this I took the [ __ ] iron yeah and put it
01:03:08
against the [ __ ] curtain everything in my room is like blocked and you know I mean I've done yeah
01:03:13
you've done that look at this fully enclosed oh so this opens and closes completely if you want a little light
01:03:18
you can literally look at that they left a little light in the bottom yeah it also looks like prison you don't care no I know but it does
01:03:24
look a little prisoning yeah you like the bunk on the bus huh yeah the little car that it's a coffin yeah but it's
01:03:31
Pitch Black in fact one because what happens is we sleep around two in the morning we drive we do yeah
01:03:38
you're I'm already at 9am at 9pm yeah but uh we're in bed you wake up you open
01:03:43
your eyes and you're in a different city which is great it's so cool but one city I don't know what happened but we parked
01:03:49
underneath a bridge or something like was it oh it's that one and when I woke
01:03:55
up I literally thought that I had died Louisville you're Louisville because it was Pitch Black I opened my eyes and it
01:04:02
was so dark I'm like I think I died I just prepped something on the phone by the way because uh by the way many of
01:04:09
you have met McCone our new videographer he's lovely we love the kid he's on stage with us now he's gonna be back on
01:04:15
the show when we come back uh we love him he's probably gonna be a member of the bad Friends team for life I think you
01:04:20
there's something about you and him why I love him no but there's something going on what do you mean not sexual
01:04:26
well I don't know I mean we haven't tried no I know I know it's it's like a
01:04:32
dad it's like a real father and son not at you know not as a mentor but a real
01:04:39
that relationship I see you guys yeah well here's why it's it's sweet like you make him call
01:04:46
you Daddy it's sweet first of all it's Papa sweet Papa Santino no you know what it
01:04:53
is because I really love him and he is uh he is a member of our family because of my good friend Brandon dermer our
01:04:58
mutual friend who I've known for years directed my first special and he said you're this kid is very intelligent he's
01:05:06
extremely like cultured and Keen his music sensibility is [ __ ] Way Beyond he's 23 years old and he knows more than
01:05:12
most people in our age range and his um talent and depth of talent to come in
01:05:20
the future you know when you see someone in your like when we knew Jesse when I first saw you do stand up
01:05:25
you just kind of can tell no matter what beyond the fact that you're good now is like well you're only going to get
01:05:32
better and just and I see the same thing in him where I'm like he's only gonna get better at his craft he's annoying he is annoying as [ __ ] and
01:05:38
I'm gonna tell you I'll give you an example I needed to say that first before I'll give you what can I just throw my
01:05:44
thing here's how he's annoying annoying yeah all right he because I had already complimented him before we went on to
01:05:51
her that you're very good at like starting conversations with people that are famous or like you're not
01:05:56
intimidated by certain situations environments right so when we had coffee with Rob Schneider you know Rob's have
01:06:04
to has the court I had the second chord we're going back and forth right and I'm outside in the smoke break yeah and I'm
01:06:09
looking at Macon I can see him with his lips like he's waiting waiting for you know I mean to get his [ __ ]
01:06:15
thing in and he goes so what was it like on SNL was it scary in the I go stop McConnell
01:06:21
I know you're doing don't make it weird you're not doing it right yeah I called it out but he's young it doesn't matter
01:06:28
it's annoying but you know what shut your mouth he's a sweet boy shut your [ __ ] I drove we drove we
01:06:34
took an Uber down to Raleigh to go see Prof this rapper Who's the [ __ ] so talented and he goes
01:06:40
yo we're gonna get on stage for the last song Get on stage and I go I'm good I don't wanna you know what I mean I don't
01:06:46
want to like take up space for someone's show yeah McCone on the other hand I'll go on
01:06:53
stage stage can't [ __ ] wait annoying he's not even at he didn't ask him annoying but I said Can the kid go on
01:06:59
stage in Prof goes yeah it's all good and I was like you're [ __ ] idiot he didn't ask him yeah yeah so there he is
01:07:04
in a hockey jersey he's in a Minnesota Wild jersey because he's from Minnesota as well dancing look at him dance he's jiving with everyone having a good time
01:07:10
and then of course here we go when it hits watch it what that's McComb watch McCone go off ready and there he goes
01:07:17
yes yes yes yes yes Amped Amped he's amped
01:07:22
the kid had a great time he had a wonderful time one of many things we've done on the on
01:07:27
the tour that are just so fun one last thing about Macon he doesn't deserve living this lifestyle he sent me remember he told well back in the day I
01:07:35
went to go see Chappelle right did you show the video I don't oh
01:07:41
yeah yes it goes he goes yeah I went to go see the Chappelle and I go okay cool and he goes he invited everyone out to
01:07:46
this club so I went I was like okay and he goes look at this video it's
01:07:52
basically McCone dancing like he has the camera in Chappelle's face yeah for like 45 minutes yeah right like I suppose at
01:07:59
what point Chappelle's like
01:08:07
but the most important thing about that [ __ ] is that every day
01:08:13
he wakes us up at four five in the morning that last one was horrifying because he has night terrors I'm gonna
01:08:19
play some of them for you here he talks in his sleep and his night terrors before you even play this is not an
01:08:25
exaggeration it's not any kind of FIB no this is it it's so real because I I'm a
01:08:32
deep sleeper yeah and this [ __ ] has woken me up six times oh yeah every time I think people in the live because
01:08:39
we've been telling the live shows what's happening and I I can tell people think we're making this we're not making up this is real so there's an app that
01:08:45
records your sleep in fact on this show a year and a half two years ago we played my friend Tyler's nighttime Clips
01:08:51
who also has an app who has night terror or as night night walking and all that um this is just one clip we don't have
01:08:59
all of them obviously this is just one this is him oh oh
01:09:05
whoa whoa whoa whoa in the middle of the night at four
01:09:10
in the morning whoa just talking there wasn't no dirty sad but I don't imagine
01:09:16
message a sick twisted boy it sounds less scary
01:09:22
at like this but imagine you're just in a dead sleep in a dead sleep yeah and you it the first time it happened I
01:09:28
thought someone was like getting hurt on the bus licking staff because he's like oh no no no no my God no I wish everyone
01:09:35
we should do it next exercise no no what's the other one he said he's
01:09:41
the one where he's like Daddy Dad no Dad yeah Daddy no no Daddy yes Dad no yes Dad we keep telling him yeah you got to
01:09:48
go to therapy and he goes nothing happened to me and I said something happened something said my brain not good
01:09:53
what he said but the doctor said my my brain's not good yeah well the doctor's
01:09:59
right but you only have night terrors like that if something happened no no that's what his doctor said his his
01:10:04
friends and that it could be that nothing happened to him and his brain's just I doubt it I don't know I think
01:10:09
something happened I think the doctor did it good trick yeah nothing happened to you
01:10:15
right right take this Klonopin but it's every morning I'm not kidding you you think he got possessed yeah I think
01:10:21
maybe we should do an exorcism on him would love to do that we got to find a guy San Antonio right San Antonio maybe
01:10:29
we'll actually we'll exercise the demons what is Carlos in all of this can I ask you can I say something please I'm gonna
01:10:36
die no I'm gonna die and I realize it's not the breath but Carlos with
01:10:43
with despite his smell is so confident um number one um I realize I'm not a scientist yeah
01:10:50
you're right I'm not and I'm not also a Pia of any kind yeah right and I'm an analyst correct sure right so but I've
01:10:57
done some deductions you're able to deduce deduce it's not his breath so can I just say
01:11:03
that what is it it's him what do you mean it's just like his armpits no his essence
01:11:10
his skin I I let me just make a point okay please he's not here to defend himself it's fine I'm gonna get him on
01:11:17
the phone yeah because he needs to defend himself for this to be fair right so if you cut him open and you smell
01:11:23
this inside I know do you remember in Star Wars the tauntauns no do you remember the Tonto you're saying
01:11:30
he's rotten to the core yes yes Carlos hey man you're on the podcast right now
01:11:36
and I felt it was only fair if you were able to defend yourself because Bobby's just bringing up something that he feels
01:11:41
about you and I just I love you first of all I love you I think you're doing a great job on the tour thank you Bobby and I think that you and
01:11:48
I have bonded I agree yes so that being said go ahead
01:11:56
go ahead Carlos all right go ahead I mean Bobby what do you mean me go ahead all I was saying I don't think you have
01:12:03
bad breath am I in trouble no I don't think you have bad breath oh thank you Bobby yeah that was just a
01:12:09
joke you were doing no it's not a joke um I think I've deduced it down to what
01:12:15
the problem is okay what's the problem your core smells
01:12:24
my core that's where it comes from my breath no it's not just your breath it's everything your essence your essence he
01:12:32
thinks yeah anything you know like the tomtom's
01:12:38
from Empire Strikes Back yeah he thinks that's he thinks that's you
01:12:43
I think he's lying injection no I think Han Solo I thought they smell bad on the inside
01:12:51
I think you it comes from your insides what do you think Buddy
01:12:56
you know I think I take good care of myself and I eat well and all I do bad is Jewel and smoke pot so my insides
01:13:04
shouldn't snow that bad okay fair point and I think Bobby is making more of an
01:13:09
energy joke about me like oh I'm a dark dirty person or something but I don't I don't think bisexuality or I'm not
01:13:17
searching things at night is should be considered dirty okay okay so it's like a psychological
01:13:24
thing with Bobby right so maybe you don't smell to anybody else they're talking about a dumpster
01:13:31
sniper a little too hot there he's can I tell you yeah I can't wait to get away
01:13:36
from this guy again no he wants to know
01:13:47
fancy is referencing the girl that you made out with against a dumpster in Nashville
01:13:53
oh yeah um she's cute she was she was good looking
01:13:59
yeah yeah she yeah she liked my picture today on Instagram so okay thank you
01:14:05
follow each other now but are you we miss you too buddy how's Texas
01:14:11
great but you know like today I posted a picture of McCone and then maybe you know starts to miss the tour and I want
01:14:18
you to know that Bobby did text me today unprompted um a link to Instagram just and I think
01:14:24
he misses me too oh dude when I send you [ __ ] [ __ ] on Instagram dude you do
01:14:30
not talk about it hold on okay what was it no I'm not gonna do not say it what was it I'm not going to I'm not gonna
01:14:36
thank you so much thank you I'll tell you in private sometimes we have secrets fine all right
01:14:44
because you texted me it was just something that with the bond over but let's move on okay okay thank
01:14:51
you good to see you bye-bye see you in Texas if you have to know I do I should I feel
01:15:00
like it was just um a Kiss cover band The Name Of This Kiss cover band what
01:15:07
Peck
01:15:19
is it yeah um so good but can I tell you what he sent me after that then what it's
01:15:27
it's insane so that he should start sending me these oh my God
01:15:32
insane it's insane all right let me say this we're so happy to be continuing the tour also for people that stuck around
01:15:39
this late in the episode you're in for a treat we are going to be doing some dates in the fall I can't tell you where
01:15:45
I can give you some big cities let me give you some hints thank you
01:15:52
yeah and I'll give you another one oh I think I know and I'll give you
01:15:59
another one there's poop everywhere yeah yeah and I'll get and I'll give you and I'll give
01:16:05
you another one that's enough uh thank you so much you guys please come see us we're going to
01:16:11
be adding dates and adding cities as we go um also uh we know we have we had to skip uh
01:16:18
Virginia because it was out of our [ __ ] control we're sorry about that sorry I'm sorry I got sick we're trying we're trying to make that up but it was
01:16:23
out of our control what happened we you know it's a huge bummer I'm sorry but we're trying to make up everything we
01:16:28
can as we go and we love you and most importantly thank you for being a bad friend laughs
01:16:37
[Music]
