00:00:00
Carlos um you know I've known you for a long time and I thought that I trusted you and then um Andreas I mean you look
00:00:07
like a guy that doesn't prank and that is an honest one as well and when you guys shock me doing that Hollywood thing
00:00:14
Halloween episode it was a real betrayal and I and I and you guys mock me still yeah you know what I mean cuz when I came here today you still you had the shocked caller on the table just to make fun of not funny that was not funny that
00:00:26
wasn't funny at all and I was I was being real like you're lucky you have a job yeah we apologize no you didn't no we're
00:00:33
we're apologize well they're doing it now you're doing it now you're apologizing now yeah well let's see rud did you accept the apology from these
00:00:39
guys was it really painful is this here's what they told me that it was fake and so you don't you're not like anticipating it yeah so you're completely relaxed yeah and then when it
00:00:52
hits you like that it it it doesn't it's it hurts but it hurts your soul I bet it's kind of shocking to get something like that to hit you like that traumatic to my neck right it wakes you up a yeah
00:01:04
it's like my neck neck that's what it was and you can say that you can't cut that you don't have to cut that out sorry for yeah you did you did that and you know and the and my
00:01:16
neck said no sorry Bob mhm yeah you you told us once that you would do anything for comedy so we thought okay longwinded
00:01:23
not a real apology no no I oh so it's my fault no yeah dude oh my God what a Twist he put it on you it's my fault I hit you because you you you made me no I
00:01:34
will hit you because you make me hit you that's what it is right I don't want to hit you I hit you but you make your eyes
00:01:41
and your face make me want to hit you oh yeah yeah but yeah I'm sorry Bobby you didn't deserve it that's right I can make fun of you dude I know you know
00:01:52
that I mean there's other things I look at your face and everything about you I I have things I can say yes you me but I
00:01:58
don't I hold my tongue you do right so good yeah you two are bad friends who are these two idiots a white dude and an
00:02:06
Asian dude you two are disgusting you two are something we're bad friends wait is this the real Invisible candy that we're talking about candy I'm talking about this is what we're talking about this I don't know
00:02:18
what this called that's right I'm on the box look at you on the package I'm on the package and I remember it does come
00:02:23
with with stickers yeah it's pretty cool yeah have you had one of these yeah I they're way better than way better than
00:02:28
the White Lotus whatever you know the song b and rice r cand Rice I like B rice candy is this what you have back in the old country get in the hole the
00:02:40
Americans up coming get in the hole we're going to build a trail boom boom boom a sound of the bombs boom boom boom
00:02:47
goes a sound of the boms prob one I'm about to I got to open it up welcome back to the bad Friends
00:02:54
Podcast where we're trying out some brand new botan rice candy oh my God Carlos just won't interest anybody except for you and me but Dwight Howard oh yeah it's insane Bobby do you know
00:03:05
who this is oh yeah dude the one that's singing Taylor Swift that's exactly right the football player Dwight Howard
00:03:11
is a famous NBA player who got caught he got caught hooking up with the dudy dudy
00:03:16
and that's not a problem that's okay not the first time that's okay but he's got allegations that it wasn't okay that the
00:03:22
guy wasn't in you know it's an it's an essay wait wait wait it's an essay it's an assault so he assaulted another man
00:03:30
yes how does how do you eat the rapper you eat it wait you eat the so you eat this is how you eat this the whole thing
00:03:36
it's so good promise I swear to God it melts in your mouth does everyone do this
00:03:42
yes M cool why you why your face like that oh this is good honestly you don't like it
00:03:49
oh man you like it there's no flavor yeah I'm pretty there's no flavor what the [ __ ] you talking you mean sweet
00:03:56
isn't a flavor I don't taste the sweet oh it's like you just you know nothing it's pretty flavorless all right let's not chew into the
00:04:07
M no stick it in your mouth no finish it it's so gross no finish it finish it finish it the paper put the paper in your mouth finish it yeah finish
00:04:19
up okay Bob and I had dinner last night the most depressing dinner I've ever had
00:04:25
it was a fun dinner with a good friend an old friend it was [ __ ] depressing we had a very good time good friend though good friend depressing and you
00:04:32
had tuna tartar I had stomach aches I hate that place really yeah my tummy hurt it was terrible well maybe because of the cream yeah you did drink a lot I drink a lot of cream this guy's are
00:04:43
cream lactose intolerant cream Drinker I love the cream but my point is is that and then my tummy started hurting and
00:04:49
then I laugh but it was fine didn't you enjoy the the experience with an old I love him because he's um an old friend
00:04:56
an old friend is it nice to see old friends do you have any old friends car it's when I see you guys no but Andrew
00:05:02
though is like you know like you see a show like 30 something what what are you talking
00:05:08
about I'm not a sitcom from 95 I this is just can I just say something yeah when you're in that setting you cross your legs like this mhm he does and he like he's like a
00:05:21
normal guy like you know I mean so um so how's your weeks been you know how how you feeling he's like a normal guy he go into normal mode yeah but me I'm still I'm the guy that I'm like where's the
00:05:32
cream you know I mean I want my c order the cream you know you I'm crazy you know but he's like you know he he's
00:05:39
dressed nice yeah he looks like a normal allamerican man we went out to a nice dinner you should have dressed up a little bit it was a nice restaurant I didn't know I it sounded like a hot dog
00:05:50
joint it is a hot dog joint it's a nice high-end hot dog joint uh oh hot dogs presented by m yeah but it was a nice
00:05:57
dinner the valet that was nice right by my house which is I've never even heard of it you couldn't be closer
00:06:03
to your house and then I went to the store and I had a poo between [ __ ] shows it was terrible have you pooed in
00:06:08
the main room Green Room every time I'm in there there's no door it's two swinging saloon doors I know that's why
00:06:15
I like it so wet I love showcasing you do no I tell well so there's two parts of the Green Room there's like the where
00:06:22
people Lounge you've been in there mhm and then there's a door so whenever I'm in there I'm like hey I tell everyone
00:06:28
I'm going to take a [ __ ] don't go in here you announce I got I make a noise I have an announcement to make what is it what is it I poo poo Oh yay
00:06:39
how am I eating this again yeah are you sure you eat the outside of this didn't it melt in your mouth no I feel like
00:06:45
it's in my teeth yeah it melt in your mouth can I say something about your poy to Bobby no please no no you may not
00:06:51
actually I'll say it okay go ahead but let me say something I have beef in my car do what do I have in my car butcher box yeah butcher box a lot of meat a lot
00:07:01
of meat yeah you want the meat right watch what you say okay every time I clean your toilet there's so much poo stains we'll be right back we'll be
00:07:13
right back yeah thank you guys we'll be right back there's so much of pooa stains yeah and they're like so sticky
00:07:20
you can't take it off oh your your poo is dry no you have dry poo no I usually don't have so much stains and they're so sticky I poo shrapnel I have to brush it
00:07:31
for like 30 minutes good it's on purpose it's on purpose I don't understand why it's so
00:07:36
sticky he pushes harder when it shoots out it why do we always have to talk about poo let's get
00:07:42
off of it yeah yeah yeah but can I say something it's the cream and I got to cut down on the cream
00:07:50
yeah yeah yeah what have you been doing Rudy I've been watching One Piece nonstop love one piece two piece is
00:07:57
better though what I don't know anime one piece mhm yeah yeah let me see let me see it one piece anime two piece Min what are we talking
00:08:09
about yeah so this is it welcome to one pce look at the guy in the front he's even going One Piece One pie it's a bunch of pirates and I've been and the one to the right is that uh with the
00:08:21
Pinocchio nose you're telling me all these people are pirates yeah yeah but is the guy with the lung is he a li is he a liar yeah he's a liar the biggest liar because of he's Pinocchio then oh I
00:08:34
didn't notice that do you know what Pinocchio is yeah what do you mean I never realized that the guy with the
00:08:40
long nose well let me when he tells a lie does his nose grow no it doesn't grow but it's oh he lied so much it's at
00:08:47
its peak yeah yeah I didn't realize that what's the story of One Piece can we guess okay go so the guy with the nose right he's not the main character I
00:08:58
understand but he's on the the poster right so he's like you know series regular okay Co he had to audition
00:09:05
probably test mhm right he probably had a test I think they run a train on that girl on the left and the guy with the
00:09:10
nose used to be the king but now this guy with his big dick finger is in the dude that's where I'm yeah that's the
00:09:16
head guy well she was she met the guy with the long nose first yeah of course and she's like oh I'm this is the guy I
00:09:22
want to sit on your face yeah and he's got the his nose is bigger than any dick I've ever had looks like but then she
00:09:27
runs into the ring the finger the monster Finger monster finger and now the guy in the long nose is like look at
00:09:33
his hand he's like what about my nose he's trying to make it look it's big isn't it yeah you yeah yeah and he's
00:09:39
like no but my finger's bigger and she look at her how happy she is she's stoked and the two guys in the back are
00:09:45
just Mafia bosses what they look like Mafia bosses yeah the one with the green hair is so hot zoom in what do you mean when you say hot what's hot about him
00:09:56
yeah that guy's hot he barely has any facial features that guy no that's not a good picture find another he has no nose no nose okay just do Zoro one piece Zoro
00:10:10
that's his name Zoro uhhuh do you flick your bean to this stuff what do you strum the guitar to this you
00:10:17
get look look that guy's hot oh my God I'm so confused it's it's so stupid you know why because he has two abs and two ABS
00:10:30
by he only two abs look at that he's he's got a two a scars a scar on his face look at how big his mouth yeah huge teeth but he uses three swords I mean
00:10:41
this is Downy downsy downsy yeah oh there's oh that's a that's the live action version live are they doing live
00:10:47
action yeah wait you don't like that you like the animation more than the real Guy animation is there anything for me can I
00:10:54
be the long note oh you look up Nami yeah here this is what I'm going to audition for Nam oh that's the photo
00:11:00
that's yeah wa oh so that's why you like them right what is that no is it not Zoro stop faking it what is I've never seen that before look at that penis zoom in on the penis that's the piece in one
00:11:12
piece yeah yeah oh that's the piece oh look at so much cream so much my stomach hurts right now just by looking at that so one piece is your this is your this is your everything my
00:11:26
everything right now what is it about though cuz I think probably wrong it's you know that guy with the big finger so
00:11:33
he's the captain and he wants to be the king of the Pirates and to be the king of the Pirates is to be the strongest
00:11:40
and to be the most powerful and so they go on a lot of adventures together and you just see so many like characters and
00:11:48
different powers because he ate a devil fruit and he's a rubber guy and so he can like he can he can be big he ate devil fruit and now he's the
00:12:01
rubber guy yeah I think I'm gonna go home what are you talking about yeah so none of these people look like I I I'm the Anime Studio you PCT me the show okay check this out hold hold on tell me
00:12:13
about the characters okay so the characters you're going to love so there so the show is called One Piece One
00:12:18
Piece is what they look like shut up this is my assistant sorry it's my driver the you you have to fire her
00:12:25
because she loudmouth so it's called thanks for coming here it's called tell one piece what about and there's five
00:12:32
Pirates six Pirates okay five and six six Pirates five or six one of six but one one of them is the leader and he's got a big oh but let me ask you this I love the photo thank you the little guy
00:12:43
right there what that that's you sir it's a reindeer oh that me yeah we did thank you for including me yeah we
00:12:48
incorporated you in the game you thank you time out that's a reindeer you uhhuh and he also ate a devil fruit so he can
00:12:55
go half human half animal this who this your assistant my driver yeah tell her shut [ __ ] up you can't please be shut
00:13:03
[ __ ] up but I know one p you don't know the show hold on she cre she's crazy no
00:13:10
she created she's crazy oh she crazy oh I see anyway continue and so so you see the woman on the right with the big tits which one oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah the orange the redhe head that you I
00:13:22
knew you'd get it that's me that you that you that's who I really want yeah I see and two per two can I ask this thing
00:13:28
just do the transition why create us the show if we sell the show I'm going to have the money to do it oh just like the
00:13:33
wasas brother that's right and two people to the right is you sir and the yellow there that is a depiction of you
00:13:39
the little one I thought they the little one was me well that's just for that's that's you in the game but you in our
00:13:45
brain is the guy on the far right oh thank you mhm and then who is the gay guy in the gr can we cut him out in the green in the green I don't like at all that's Zozo Zoro Zoro Zoo that's zoo I I
00:14:00
I prefer Zoo it's Zoo because Zoro is hacky right Zoro is a guy that exists stealing right stealing yeah yeah what
00:14:07
about the woman that look like my mom she's an archaeologist yeah [ __ ] right yeah
00:14:14
really you think that woman's digging up [ __ ] yeah she wore a [ __ ] big titted
00:14:19
top and a grass skirt to dig up the Earth yeah no tool what an ill she use a titty to [ __ ] but she has powers where she can create more limbs oh God I'm so sick of this what's
00:14:33
a devil this is pissing me off explain me devil flute it's uh it's what all the the Filipinos call their private parts oh devil fruit yeah I've eaten
00:14:44
devil fruit I know you have tastes like ballut and then uh what is rubber man what explain me rubber man oh rub who what is a rubber man well you said he ate the double root and the rubber man
00:14:56
the rubber man yeah a rubber man do you have any friends friends that are into like glory holes oh I have one friend in
00:15:02
my company we have a we have a janitor name is Carlos years ago he used to work for a batt friend company all right yeah
00:15:09
but then he said the andw so many times he did yeah yeah and he did so many Glory Glory [ __ ] yeah you know I do I
00:15:17
know them I've never seen one but I but this guy go in all the time he Liv in there so that guy what that guy Carlo
00:15:23
he's a rubber man now it makes sense right yeah mhm what's a glory hole oh you ask well we have something here let's see it this is a true story that
00:15:35
happened this week um a girl yeah a girl in uh Amsterdam a British girl was um sucking a dick in a glory hole and when she turned on some sort of light at this really fancy Glory Hall it was revealed
00:15:47
that it was her dad and this and we have a voice note from one of the friends I want to hear
00:15:53
it okay go ahead all right it's pretty good to story because I'm literally telling everyone it's so horrific so my
00:16:00
friend Amia who I was with yesterday she's got a mate called Ellie who's in a house share in London and um Ellie
00:16:07
shares with like a bunch of girls and one of the girls was telling her she's just been on a Hu to Amsterdam where the
00:16:14
Stag and the hen went at the same time I think they were were just like a mixed social group who kind of like knew each
00:16:19
other but then the Stag went one day and the hen one way and the H went the other for people that don't know stago
00:16:27
and hu are Bachelor party that's what that means dude got super drunk and went into one of these boobs with like a glory hole and so a girl on the other side stuck his dick through so the girl
00:16:39
was just drunk and started sucking him off but it was one of these ones apparently where like if like he pushes
00:16:46
a button and the guy pushes the button on the other side they can kind of see who's on the other side like it makes it
00:16:52
like transparent like a window so they can see and so being drunk she thought it' be hilarious to push this button just to see H you been sucking off uhhuh and so she pushes the button
00:17:05
and looks up and it's her dad on the other side I'll tell you how that make I'll tell you where it could have even been worse imagine if you went to a
00:17:16
glory Hall imagine a penis comes through it's your dead Dad it's my dead tag he's dead he's dead
00:17:26
so before it was cold then your tongue gets stuck to it like it's a pole do you really think this happened I don't know this girl but if I was do we know this girl
00:17:41
no a glory hole Rudy is just a place where adults go and they put their genitals through a literal hole in the
00:17:46
wall and they don't know who's on the other side and they get pleasure what and somebody else sucks that from the other side yeah in this scenario there
00:17:53
was a door like a window thing yeah and then they got to see each other that's just scary Carlos
00:17:59
all the time they she found the hole at a place called cuckoldplace.com I guess that's like the name of a oh Carlos play
00:18:06
dumb I guess that's a website that you've literally been to 100 how' you get the story [ __ ] face yeah that's the
00:18:12
story what would you do I mean it was your daughter KMS you would I killed myself yeah on the site or you make a deal yeah I me to deal with the devil just that moment when I put my dad no
00:18:23
you make a deal with your dad don't ever tell anybody no that's just Dad very good by the way but nice pis but don't tell M let's not even this never
00:18:34
happen Okay and then at the you know Christmas is weird he's gonna be drunk at a party and you're GNA [ __ ] beat
00:18:40
him in a game of Scrabble and he's be like remember that time you sucked my dick oh yeah he's GNA do that every time
00:18:46
that's what dads do that's true they they hold that stuff that would they ter like what would happen i' I'd bleach my
00:18:54
tongue and then kill myself yeah you want to get it off the tongue first yeah yeah yeah garle it what does it say on
00:19:01
your shirt property property of it's another anime show hey so are you aren't you are you going to outgrow anime at some point I don't think so no you'll do it forever forever hello fresh you guys
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or 34% off for three or more displates displ collect your passions what have you been doing in your life I want to know what you been doing I've been taking a birth control and I've been
00:22:28
going crazy what the what is going on you've been taking a birth control yeah and I'm like going crazy I'm like mad I want to kill someone why did you start taking birth control at 22 because my
00:22:42
acne I don't even care about sex it's just my acne That Tito Bobby bullies me every time you don't have acne he's the one with a pimple patch on right now because I've been taking the person she
00:22:52
doesn't have acne I don't bully you you bully me every time you see me I go Rocky out high when I look at your face
00:22:59
I know I do that but that's aoke it's a joke wait a minute so you're 22 years old now right 21 okay 21 when you turn
00:23:07
22 next month yeah you're 22 shut up 22 I can't believe it I remember you were in high school I know it was insane
00:23:14
started this show when she was in high school that's incredible so you're 22 and you just started taking birth control who told you to do this your
00:23:20
doctor yeah why cuz of my acne and then she said oh just take the new ring it's like a small they're always just shoving is that funny how Qui they are to just prescribe stuff why would you take it
00:23:31
don't take it wait it's this big what are you talking about the circle and you just put it put in your but hole why in
00:23:36
the butthole that's where I put mine oh I put mine there yeah put myver ring up my butthole yeah so you put it in there
00:23:43
yeah and it just stays there for three weeks and then I'm just and you're are you I don't want to are you still seeing
00:23:49
that guy yeah how's that going how's that how's that going fine we haven't we haven't done it but in like four
00:24:02
months so it's fine why cuz I don't know I'm just not 4 months that is at at 21 years old I was spewing with Seaman I was dripping out
00:24:16
of my eyeballs okay but you're a guy she's waiting for Sor Sor if he dyed his hair green would it be yeah tell your guy to dye his head no I need the real
00:24:28
no but why four mon really four months yeah I just don't like sex right now yeah that's okay I'm actually better off with that side no I like this yeah I
00:24:40
mean I like it I like that you're not but it's like save yourself for for marriage marriage whatever no I'm not
00:24:46
save I just right now I'm not no I mean save the save it for someone that you want to obviously it sounds like you're
00:24:52
going to break up really yeah what 21y old is it's over how are you hooking up with someone once every four months that you're dating it's over doesn't make sense you know it's over right yeah I still like him I
00:25:05
like like yeah you like hanging out with him as a friend no not a friend no you're not a friend do you guys kiss
00:25:11
still Peck oh but no tongue no I don't like it this guy goes home and cries at night is that a generational thing no some people don't want tongues in their mouth do you like tongue your tongue no
00:25:23
you've tonged my tongue yeah I have yeah I kind of like it yeah so my boy my point is you do do and your wife's still
00:25:30
tongue when you get married there is moments for for tongue kissing but during the course of the day oh you
00:25:36
don't no not during the day no but there's moments when tongue kissing is yeah but it's it's not as frequent as it
00:25:42
was when you're young and but you still you're still Oppo not opposed to it no I like it but but it's situation dependent
00:25:48
she doesn't like it okay but it's the same thing as I don't like you know touching and like oh intimacy like the
00:25:56
key ingredients to having relationship yeah you like any you don't like physical affirmation no you don't want
00:26:02
him to touch you even like hug you don't like him no even when he does that I'm yeah that's not it's dead it's a dead
00:26:09
thing like that's why are you doing this with your eyes CU I'm sweating I'm being honest yeah yeah do you think I'm not
00:26:16
making a joke do you think maybe you don't like boys Le I'm lesbian I didn't say it it's okay if you were but do you
00:26:23
think maybe you don't like boys I don't know I think Kila thinks I'm a lesbian that's cuz she's a lesbian like she
00:26:30
keeps I really she is she dated you for the longest time well Sarah when I dat as soon as I you flipped so many women yeah Sarah
00:26:43
Highland I was dating for years and then when I we broke up she went with she never went back to men I am I the
00:26:49
[ __ ] last what was that movie where nobody can compete what was the movie where
00:26:54
every woman slept with a guy so they could get married finally what was that called Dane Cook movie yeah what was
00:26:59
that called Good Luck Chuck yeah you're [ __ ] you're Dane Cook you're good luck
00:27:05
you're good luck Chuck for women wow you've made two girls go to the other team I know maybe honestly maybe you
00:27:12
don't like boys or maybe you don't like this boy but maybe you don't like boys maybe maybe you don't like anybody you
00:27:18
could be uh what is it asexual right or no is that right yeah yeah maybe I don't
00:27:24
know yeah maybe people don't interest you sexually and you're just want to I just like being like in their company
00:27:31
but not like touching or like physical you sound like you don't cuddle error like when we're watching a movie you don't go like I'm just like that and then he's there and then when he tries
00:27:43
I'm just like no yeah yeah wow that must be heartbreaking it's so heart yeah he's got to leave how old is he
00:27:50
21 God yeah he's got to get out ID this idiot what an idiot he's got to be heartbroken but I'm nice it's just yeah
00:27:56
we know hey guy you know who I'm talking to break it up break it up it's not working it's not working yeah find somebody else so you think I why don't you just be single why are you in a
00:28:07
relationship if you don't really like this guy so much it's your it's your family dude my family yeah it's in the
00:28:13
blood dude me I've dated your family staying with someone for too long no they're just like you know no yeah I get
00:28:18
it get out get out yeah it's shit's weird man I'll think about it tuck tuck you got to get out tuck tuck let me tell you how much love Filipinos my physical
00:28:30
therapist is Filipino love this guy Lo love he uses all those Filipino tricks of the trade that you guys have back there like what he hits me in the back with uh um little
00:28:42
tiny like little sticks with bugs all over them he says that's from the home country that's what he says and it's
00:28:48
getting all the impurities out of my back he licks my feet which I think he said is a thing that they do in the
00:28:54
Philippines do you lick feet well I had a cousin that they he they said that he had she had like healing saliva so she would just like everyone and that it would heal
00:29:06
everything so I did make my part up but it is so beautiful that yours was real you had someone who are she's like the Filipino theovon I know yeah like M money my B
00:29:22
would lick the sickness right out of you it's insane that's I've never heard anything like that that's crazy saying
00:29:27
the saliva was had magical powers everyone thought that she had magical powers because every time she would lick
00:29:34
like something would like heal right yeah it would heal wow it like their Wolverine just close right up that's insane some kid of the neigh does like a broken arm like come over here like
00:29:46
broke whoa that's what she did and you saw it first yeah have you been healed by her M no I no no we got to see this
00:29:57
my sister was like had this um a fever and she licked her forehead there's no way way no there's a way she did that I sure she did it and
00:30:13
the girl got healed from embarrassment she was like I'm okay now yeah she could have died that night she wouldn't have told anybody she was so embarrassed yeah
00:30:21
maybe it's psychological well everyone thought so I believed it yeah yeah okay my grandmother yeah how many people in your village had magical powers my Lola
00:30:32
my grandma like you said with your physical therapist he would hit me with bug sticks not he she didn't use and I made that up but she used like leaves and stuff and she would like put it on
00:30:44
like the wo yeah Palm FR like Palm FR yeah that's that's not magical that's not magical that's ancient Chinese Tech
00:30:52
yeah M there was this old lady who we thought was like a mananga oh a man well we've had three of those growing up I had three manal growing up
00:31:02
I used to have a manal underneath my balls like a year and a half I had to get it removed so expensive though
00:31:08
they're like $3,000 a month to rent one it's a mythical creature exactly and they're hard to find yeah they really
00:31:14
are yeah yeah so so you thought you someone in your village was a man angal yeah and then there you know where you
00:31:21
can find a manal in the taint of a Bigfoot that's right that's where man yeah yeah they cling on right you know
00:31:28
how like sometimes sharks they have other fishes that that clean their skin that's what a man does to a Bigfoot so
00:31:35
that's how I got mine and a lus monster if you can find one okay I have another one I have another one so they said that
00:31:43
okay so there was like a bunch of like pregnant women in my Village yeah and then they said that there was this lady
00:31:50
an old lady that would come at night and then she had like a really long tongue and then she would go to their room and would lick the baby the baby
00:32:02
would die what what wait a minute wait so those were these women getting an abortion I don't know and they blamed it on a long tonged woman yeah yeah yeah they were
00:32:13
just shoving hangers up there and were just like he has like a Planned Parenthood [ __ ] yeah walk that's what
00:32:19
my grandma told me that's what your grandma said she would go down on women maybe she was related to the other lady with the tongue yeah the lick lady the
00:32:26
lick lady the lick family the lick family yeah yeah one kills one heals I'm Bing lick mm lick yeah that's insane
00:32:35
yeah so she the the the myth that I really this is why I love the Philippines they have they believe they
00:32:40
all believe that perhaps this woman could tongue could go inside of another woman and kill the baby and they believe that yeah everybody believes that yeah
00:32:46
we were scared yeah I was I'm scared now scared scared now you know that's insane
00:32:52
yeah and my mom was pregnant and then I kept like I was so scared for her you think that the long tongue was going to
00:32:58
come yeah yeah was now was the woman's name long tongue is that a Filipino name long tongue no I don't know I forgot her
00:33:04
name something stick out your tongue is your tongue long whoa that is a long tongue that's a long tongue dude you
00:33:10
could be it you could have the thing I'd do that you'd kill babies with your tongue lunatic lick a baby you lunatic
00:33:18
she blows gu he's like it must you're killing it killing it yeah yeah but I think what we learning is that Rudy needs to go
00:33:29
through a serious unfortunate breakup and we can be there for you but I do think you need to get you need to break up how are you going to do
00:33:35
it no I can't do it all right Bobby is the kid whatever his name is Bobby's him break up with him now hey je how you going doing don't do that accent that's
00:33:46
what it sounds like you want it to be real or not yo je what are you doing does he call her Jew I don't know okay okay Joey mhm yeah yeah what's up
00:33:58
it's me you want to go watch a movie no let's talk oh [ __ ] what do you want to talk about okay well first of all can I
00:34:05
say something to you okay the first time I ever saw you it was like I seeing myself and
00:34:13
being oh I'm too loud first time me first me first me first no can I say something first though no no no no me first I'm going to tell you just something I never felt love no no I
00:34:24
never I never felt love in my life I didn't even know what love was until I met you and then once I met you I was I
00:34:31
felt like I was at home okay done okay done hold on let me finish let me because I have I wrote this down and I I
00:34:36
I want to get this off my chest why are you seeing it now because because I don't know it's just what a beautiful
00:34:41
day what a beautiful day and today I have the courage to do it all right so I also want to say can I tell you
00:34:47
something okay it's like um I would do anything for you I would lay my life down for you and it's so weird because we're not family or nothing like like that you know I wouldn't even do that with my own dad but with you I would die
00:35:00
for you do you know why I love you your soul hey guys I met you tatina P roll oh
00:35:06
thank you so much we love you you love the CH P roll what what are you guys talking about yeah anyway tell me what you were going to say to me I'm your mom
00:35:16
I I don't know Mom you love you make the great P Pizza World on the world what did you want to say to my son oh ta this
00:35:23
is private you can go okay I can say stay because remember I told you last night yeah about how her yeah you don't
00:35:31
she doesn't give you head I know aside from that okay yeah yeah yeah okay I said yeah no tongue no
00:35:37
tongue work no tongue I will St yeah anyway um is it yeah what is it uh tell you want to watch a movie no no I'm okay
00:35:46
here yeah mom stay here I will yeah tell me what you're about to say to me okay joey yes love of my life sueme he really does love you I
00:35:58
love you so rude that's my mom don't don't sh my mom oh sorry sorry okay Joey yeah yeah yeah yeah listen I'm listening
00:36:09
love okay sweet love go oh shut up oh so sexy don't say that to my son he will come when you tell him to okay Joey Joey Joey I'm about to come right now joeyy
00:36:25
let's be serious yeah I don't I don't like you anymore I think I mom do you have a mirror at do you have a mirror at home
00:36:38
have you seen what your face look like I know out of my house mom go get the shotgun mom get the shutgun he's going
00:36:44
to kill you no no no no Mom I thought I was the love of your life no you are give me the gun mom you got it thank you oh
00:36:55
yay confess you broke up with them and that's what's going to happen you want to do it though I can tell yeah no I don't want mhm I
00:37:06
feel like I just want my own space right now you guys don't live together how many times a week do you see him no
00:37:12
because we're classmates so I see him every day at school every day I see that's what [ __ ] it up what class biology and chemistry and you're not excited to see
00:37:23
him no cuz I I just hate school and so I hate him because I hate school yeah how much school you you have one year left yeah one year left one year left
00:37:36
one oh wow when you drive then you park is it is it are you depressed I'm just not
00:37:41
excited about everything anything nothing is making you happy right now except one piece oh my God Zoro Zoro is
00:37:51
the only thing that makes you happy yeah I've been binging it and I watch it like until 4:00 a.m.
00:37:57
oh my God that's all I like enjoy right now she needs medicine I have a question
00:38:03
do you guys have road rage be spoke post you guys I can't wait for the holidays because be spoke post has a box of awesome and what it is it's the best gifts you can give anybody open
00:38:17
up that box OFW this is the box of awesome right here no matter uh where your adventures are going to take you this fallen into the holidays the box of
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awesome is filled and carefully Chosen and curated for you to things that you love you can collect every single fun
00:38:30
thing that they come in and look at this we're opening up for the first time I don't in here what's in there oh the porter lunch box ooh so someone can take
00:38:37
their lunch to work I love stuff like this huh yeah you little lunch holder little sandwich holder I'm a big sandwich holder guy but also that's not
00:38:45
it my friends also huh look at this what is it it's a that's a lunch sack it's like a cute little lunch SE go to school Bo man this stuff is really great um and also uh they threw in uh utensil set of
00:38:57
stainless steel utensils this is all for on the-go stuff box of awesome is great they have a bunch of boxes guys so to
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get started take the quiz of box of awesome.com your answers will help them pick the right box of awesome for you
00:39:08
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enter the code bad friends at checkout that's box ofawesome.com codee bad friends for 20% off your first box box
00:39:37
ofawesome.com code bad friends I shot and killed a guy on the PC yeah I remember or seven that
00:39:44
was hard that was hard hard hard hard and I and I got acquitted because it was self-defense self-defense on not he
00:39:52
tried to hit my car and I they pulled over pull over they got on the one one yeah on the 101 yeah and then um that
00:39:59
was tragic but it wasn't even you didn't even kill him though you hit him over the pipe two 23 times something like
00:40:06
that yeah 23 24 times but I got acquitted yeah so no not really I don't think I have it anymore because you know why cuz it was his pipe the other guy's pipe it was his it was out his he he got it out
00:40:17
of his hand you and of self-defense he was swinging like this what pipe what's pipe a metal pipe where did you get the pipe it on the side of the how did they get
00:40:30
the pipe ear no honestly how did they get the pipe my friend my super good friend Mario my super friend Mario
00:40:36
always has pipes on him okay and then you hit it 22 times 23 23 the sound of a pipe on someone's head is Skull I'd say skull pink yeah
00:40:51
yeah crack crack yeah it's okay but you know what was crazy what what you were wearing in trial that skirt yeah the skirt it was crazy that you I wanted to show my legs well I think you were
00:41:03
trying to you trying to do the trans empathy thing well there was a jury filled with lgbtq plus people so I
00:41:10
figured I wanted so smart yeah you got to play to your crowd yeah yeah you dyed your hair purple mhm right it was
00:41:15
incredible we should dye my hair at least once yeah do I have road rage um you know what I do is I used to scream
00:41:24
right but then I realized there's nothing I can do if we pull over so what I do is I'll put my head down and I look
00:41:29
at my jeans or my pants and I'll so they can't see my face you [ __ ] you scream down yeah yeah that's I mean that's at least better than doing something yeah I don't
00:41:42
do anything I just scream downward so they don't see me do you have road rage I developed one why why cuz I've been
00:41:50
driving a lot so I've been screaming and like whenever something happens I just I just do
00:41:58
that what where are you driving to school school work and I'm just like [ __ ] you do you never get recognized no
00:42:06
from Mad bad friends at school sometimes like like when I walk after um work sometimes there's like film students who say oh are you Rudy yeah what do you say
00:42:18
it's like oh yeah and then what they say and I say oh can I take a picture I said yeah sure and then I just run you run
00:42:26
you take fidget photos with them yeah cuz they ass wow are there any hot guys that do it no no if you our fans yeah I
00:42:34
know our fans's noot they're great people film students he said huh she said film students they serious people
00:42:40
but she said hot guys there's like what hot hot people don't like regular people like our show yeah but they're all
00:42:46
beautiful no they're beautiful in their own way yeah yeah but they're not supermodels we don't get supermodels
00:42:52
that's true but you have anyone that's that you are attracted to that does it no any girls probably no girls no no girls it's all boys that recognize me
00:43:02
yeah yeah it's always boys it's always boys yeah it's always boys and does it how does it feel though when that happen be real I always get shy and I always
00:43:10
look so ugly at school and they ask for a picture and I'm just like oh but do you feel popular though or no no do you
00:43:17
ever dress up or is this kind of always it this is it yeah I dig it you're allowed to do whatever you want yeah yeah feel free the Next Generation I don't think people
00:43:28
I don't think like do you think people will wear suits in like 20 years do you think suits will still be a thing well
00:43:35
suits was a thing for hundreds of years not hundreds oh yeah in the early 1800s that suits their own versions of it yeah different styles right there's been different
00:43:47
styles of stuff yeah I mean but I don't think suits will keep going I think we're at the end of the suit you think
00:43:54
so I think so are we in the age of the sweats look we're in the age of the sweats age of sweats the end of suit Co finish off Men's Wear that's an American thing though what do you mean that's
00:44:06
where people dress the worst what dude have you seen European jeans with all their little sparkles and little [ __ ] it's [ __ ] stupid classy the [ __ ] are you talking about we
00:44:17
dress the worst we're the epicenter of f fashion dude the [ __ ] are you talking about yeah but yeah the IND everything
00:44:24
everything that the world likes we did yeah but you don't wear it yeah we make it for you losers to buy you know what we tell our Chinese friends to make it for all you idiots to
00:44:35
buy right now could could I say that America has the best restaurants no I could say that France probably has the
00:44:42
best in terms of the best restaurants in the world I don't know I'd say we probably have the same but but we still
00:44:48
we could we can compete mhm but with with fashion we beat everyone we do all the [ __ ] because we we're Multicultural so we have different kinds of fashion yeah but here for example kids dress so
00:45:01
bad at school you know like that's the The Stylist what do you make kids wear in Spain yeah I don't know people just
00:45:07
dress up a little more here's like they wear their pajamas because going to school is a big deal for you yeah it's
00:45:12
like the Crocs and the pajamas yeah but it's not a big deal for us right no also
00:45:18
they can't afford to dress up she just spent 100 Grand on school I think he has a skewed idea can I can I ask you about
00:45:24
I was at therapy yesterday yeah and we were talking about high school and um I asked her I go how do
00:45:33
you feel about pure couns not pure counseling career counseling mhm so when I was a freshman and so every year
00:45:39
actually I would go in and every year we would have to see this career counselor and every year they would go yeah just
00:45:45
take wood shop well that's a good to me right that's actually good because my grades were terrible I have no skill set
00:45:50
right that's not true no at the time right I knew that I had these you know power
00:45:56
mhm you know not the licking powers to heal the sick but like you know real human powers right and um so all through high school I thought oh I'm a loser I
00:46:07
have no other options because all these other kids are like oh yeah my career counselor said I should be an attorney or an engineer or whatever right and I
00:46:14
got wood shop and steel shop every [ __ ] did you ever take wood no I refused to but also my parents are like
00:46:21
no no wood you can't do that Koreans are scared of wood yeah we're scared of wood right
00:46:26
Driftwood are you crazy we have [ __ ] PTSD nightmares about Driftwood yeah yeah yeah anyway um fing a tree that's
00:46:32
just oh my God I can't sleep now for a week I pointed a for a tree if a tree falls in my dreams will it kill my whole
00:46:39
family yeah yeah yeah probably yeah can you make anything by hand did you learn to make anything by hand can you sew I would make I mean can you sew I can make like little sculptures with meth scabs
00:46:53
ooh I used to get these meth scabs when I you did math do you know how to sew no
00:46:59
I feel like that's in your blood a little bit Yeah if I I'm sure I could [ __ ] it up right I put you out in front of a Singer sewing machine I bet you can
00:47:05
[ __ ] it yeah you want some Nikes dude I got I got it but um but you know what sucks is they don't they don't give you the other options in high school in America right they don't go okay so um
00:47:17
you're funny like if they said you know I heard you're funny what direction would they would they point you in and
00:47:22
they're like what about improv or comedy but it's not even a this it's not an option right when it anything artistic is an option in American
00:47:33
schools yeah they they don't go all like well they just say wait till you're done you'll you'll be better off but they
00:47:38
never even said that they're like wood shot what does Woodshop mean making stuff out of wood I know but it's like
00:47:43
that's my only future there's a billion other things you can do but they don't [ __ ] Bobby Lee the carpenter how
00:47:50
[ __ ] I would make [ __ ] fer better than Jesus he actually wasn't good at all some of his pieces are really bad oh
00:47:56
yeah they're like Ikea Ikea from back then um they're always missing one knob they're like where's the Corgan
00:48:02
scroger why is that gone Jesus um no I I get that I high school's tough because it's it's placing you in a very broad box of [ __ ] when you're like I don't like any of that stuff yeah I like if
00:48:16
ASA Kira that they said oh you like the [ __ ] huh you should be a porn star yeah
00:48:22
yeah but now they might do that in schools they might be like look only fans is right for you dude that be that but that's a thing but they they
00:48:28
probably don't do it well we should just like in my high school pwe high they don't view my [ __ ] oh they don't view
00:48:34
what I do as a talent that's why I'm not in the Hall of Fame right and I agree with them in what way because are you in the Hall of Fame in your school no why would
00:48:46
I be I'm a [ __ ] dick okay what's your school I'm not in the Hall of Fame no what's your school what's the school
00:48:51
what's your school what high school Bartholomew boys are you being real Bartholomew boys if you're not I
00:48:58
swear to God Bartholomew barthol Bartholomew Bartholomew Bartholomew boys school boys you went to an old boy school yes School in what Chicago mhm
00:49:14
Chicago St Bartholomew school that's who you want mhm well you're not lying okay and then Andrew Santino what high school did Andrew C Santino go to
00:49:25
he went to napperville North High School that's right you [ __ ] like piece of [ __ ]
00:49:33
dude Hall of Fame I can't wait yeah there's no Hall of Fame in yes they do right here uh n
00:49:46
okay North Athletics what the [ __ ] see athletes it's all athletes athle it's all Athletics yeah yeah again what we do isn't special
00:49:57
okay no if you go to North napperville North High School is that what it is and you go to um it'll have it Athletics
00:50:05
notable alumni yeah you're a notable alumni so are you you're a notable alumni you're just not let me ask if you
00:50:11
know any of these guys Adrien holava oh God I love hola what did you do he's a rocket scientist no James holow James holow was the
00:50:22
Jeopardy champion [ __ ] yeah dude well everybody knows that he was [ __ ] like really one of the best champions of all
00:50:27
time yeah let's go to S there we go you're in it well yeah a stand-up comedian yeah but that's it I'm not in like a Hall of Fame I'm just a guy that went to school there how does that feel to be H Bob oder went to your school
00:50:40
yeah the odenir yeah whoa dude uhhuh Bob that's cool yeah pretty R yeah his is long comedian actor writer director and producer a lot of a lot of stuff he deserves it yeah yeah he's very talented
00:50:52
okay let me ask you who this is huh um lval Brown played football whoa dude that's [ __ ] good no this is not that hard did you know no I mean no no no can
00:51:05
we do go more try Paul Brittain he was on SNL yeah can I ask you why this did you
00:51:13
put on a pimple patch on the pimple on your chin so what happened this last night I put a pimple patch on M and then
00:51:19
when I was driving here it looks worse I know when I was driving here just leave it as a pimple when I was driving here
00:51:24
yeah I took off the patch and it looks more noticeable because of the sweater stop let meish the sweater is yellow
00:51:30
your skin is yellow let meish the pimple is yellow and red it's me and you on your face I know just finish yeah so I
00:51:37
was driving here had the pimple patch from last night well you left it on you can't you're not supposed to leave it on for a whole day but I did good you slept
00:51:44
in it yeah and I looked in the in the rear the rear view window that mirror mirror mirror imagine if it was a window
00:51:58
right and I I I saw a white head me just poking up so then I [ __ ] peeled it yeah I popped it and it was oozing blood so I took the [ __ ] patch and I put it back on no idiot that's you D you're
00:52:12
supposed to do when it's dry and not bleed it yeah and it Dam did it do the dam effect that I thought it was going to do let me
00:52:17
see I mean it just looks it looks like a flooded pimple patch like it's a full diaper on your chin why do you still have simp to Bobby you're 50
00:52:28
two and you know what dude that kind of talk means you're going to get a lot of [ __ ] sprayed on the toilets this week
00:52:34
yeah yeah oh you want sprays hold on stop oh it looks hilarious now now it's leaking how much money stop can I put this on you no please can I put this on
00:52:44
you no 10 grand no stop stop I have pimples what stop it stop it can I just put it on your face ah put it on Andre lick it eat
00:53:00
it what if I ate this well it's your [ __ ] oh that's that's not gonna that's not going to bother anybody what are you
00:53:06
doing fck can I tell you these pants what these pants are [ __ ] fun which pants go up to the front there show off your pants empty your pockets empty your pockets first look at these slacks these are
00:53:20
sexy they're so tight let me see go forward a little bit so I can see more we you spit around for
00:53:25
the camera you are a little sex machine are these These are soccer pants aren't they I know what they I got them at uh we were on the road one day but I like them
00:53:37
I'm going to wear them tomorrow to go to Denver I really like them I like when you were tight stuff it turns me
00:53:44
on I had a panic attack in line the other day like a full-on panic attack what happened I was going to order a
00:53:50
salad and I and I was on the phone with the wife and she didn't know what she wanted but it was already my turn and I
00:53:58
was doing a build your own salad and I was freaking out cuz she would change the order as I'm ordering it and the guy's like no no check pce Air1 huh where were you uh Air1 no no no
00:54:11
no airan I I've walked in there once I walked out oh I hang out there all day long I know you do what's up people that don't know airan is like an overtly pretentious overpriced Market I bought that $50 w
00:54:26
oh you got that one I still get it now I get this little bottle like this $50 water why what is in it I want oxygen
00:54:33
top water oh it's oxygenated water so good no it's top water it's like notp water no it's real like I drink it and
00:54:40
my my I get fizzy eyed let me see what is airwan $50 water don't make fun of me I'm just saying I no I'm gonna that's insane it's 50 American dollars exactly the same as the woman who licks babies
00:54:54
and she probably started that company that's not it D not Mountain Valley it's $26 go zoom in I'll tell you what the brand is oh that's $40 that bottle the first bottle yeah that's it oh for yeah
00:55:08
$30 a $30 bottle of just a regular bottle of water yeah what is it it's oxygenated water it's from the heavens butabi you have a filtered shut the [ __ ]
00:55:20
up with the filter shut the [ __ ] up with the fil every time you [ __ ] shut the [ __ ] up with filtered all right wait go
00:55:25
up go up this says nanopure go up this says nanopure it's nanopure hyper oxygenated and restructured it dude they restructure the water for your
00:55:38
mouth I can feel it in my body it's like it's going down different channels what's H2O what is H2O oxygen hydrogen
00:55:45
and water and aqua oy Aqua dude okay what could be re-engineered infused with an unmatched level of bioavailable dissolved oxygen 40 plus PP listen humans get
00:55:58
re-engineered now what yeah they do I want to be a woman now trans people who transition
00:56:04
yeah that's it's trans water dude soak in it now do you can soak in it and drink it do you drink it after you soak
00:56:09
in it they have a wellness spot dude you need that I need that so bad yeah get a
00:56:15
quote didn't tell $30,000 probably for that little all right whoa a pool oh my God your pool organically fresh
00:56:22
sanitized totally salt waterer can I say something can I say something okay I need why did we why did we get a for our
00:56:30
water to no no for we had guests on we had are you garbage on oh and you got them fancy water no no no and we go we want you to see if there's a difference between the two moners and we did a
00:56:41
taste test and did they we all said a four is number one there's something about it when you drink it I'm your mouth goes it's it's a Christmas a breath of
00:56:53
relief yeah it's the the best water dude I don't believe that water can be that much better look at the Mexican the
00:56:58
Mexicans well if they like Mexicans make it just like everything else it turns out the Mexicans are making it you like good sushi it's not made it's Mexicans
00:57:09
you like good water it's Mexicans will you try it though by the way will you try it it's Mexicans I love Mexicans no
00:57:16
I know they make everything would you try it no I'm not buying it I'm going to buy you I don't want $30 water there's
00:57:21
good reviews Andrew yeah give me the oh there's good reviews let me read Ashley white and white
00:57:28
people know their [ __ ] do not trust white people love water dude do they not I don't do we trust white people no in
00:57:33
terms of water yes no yeah so here this is what what you mean white people white aor is simply the best water I've ever
00:57:40
tasted I am Healing Arts practitioner the consumption of clean pure structured water is one of the most critical components of Health what is structured water if you haven't tasted it you don't
00:57:52
even know but when you drink it you go oh my God that's structured I would recommend it all day
00:57:59
long I drink so much it's like drinking dirt water now this she goes I drink so much that 10 lbs melted away but this is bought this is generated it's not that's real peoplee yeah she lost 10 PB from
00:58:12
what's her name what's her name what's her name what's her name Deb no one's been named Deb in a hundred [ __ ] years every Deb is dead give me more
00:58:19
reviews only two yeah six total reviews of this [ __ ] [ __ ] go down to the bottom I'll tell this is the biggest croc of [ __ ] on Earth go down to the way bottom yeah right there yeah Dr Jeff let
00:58:31
me zoom in I'm going to say what he says and I'm going to say thank you o for my family's been drinking oxygenated water
00:58:37
for the past year my 9-year-olds hardly ever get sick now this is kakimi [ __ ] it's so crazy this guy's trying
00:58:44
to pit you that your water [ __ ] makes you not get SI so crazy you say that because I go suck on a CO door now I had
00:58:49
Co that's like the leaking lady is the same thing you guys are so stupid you know what I hate about you you guys
00:58:54
right now dude what what do you not like about us I'll tell you what you don't like when coch one came
00:59:00
out Coke one yeah when they redid Coke Coke Zero no the one original Coke oh yeah no Coke what was it Coke what was it called when they reinvented Coke New Coke New Coke that's not there was no
00:59:14
new Coke yeah b as a spokesman what in the 80s New Coke in the you weren't even live you [ __ ] in the 80s they got rid of old Coke and they go I'm new it was
00:59:26
just and people went we don't like it but a lot of people didn't try [Music] it did you know that a lot of people didn't fry
00:59:38
it we bottled a big can of [ __ ] we bottled human poop and a lot of people didn't like it but they didn't try it what I'm saying you're a great boy dude try it you're such a marketing
00:59:50
major dude I'm the best you are I'll try it I'm telling you that water I'm going to give everyone a bottle of [ __ ] $30
00:59:55
water please you buy it I'll buy it bring it in here and then I put in your fridge let it chill and in the morning
01:00:01
wake up take a shot of it and then you see I'll tell you what I liked I like Crystal Clear Pepsi when it came out
01:00:07
what was that and no one liked it no one liked it and it got pulled off the shelves and you know why nobody liked it why they didn't try it and I hate
01:00:14
Crystal Clear Pepsi never had it look it look at it it was clear it was literally Clear Pepsi you can still buy it on the internet today it was so good I don't
01:00:22
know why I liked it so much so here's the deal for next week go go back to the story what you're in you're in line with
01:00:30
the the salad oh yeah and I couldn't get it right and they kept dumping out the ingredients I kept going back and forth
01:00:36
and I had such a I had such a moment of fear that I anyway thank you for being a bad
01:00:42
friend perfect you didn't say amalgamation yeah I literally did say amalgamation did he say it yeah that's you got the woods
01:00:55
wood shop yeah that's why you couldn't do wood shop and because Bobby gave all he can in that one uh let me tell you
01:01:02
something we're giving you guys a higher [Music] [Music] discount wo woo W woo wo
01:01:41
yeah