00:00:00
How's the low light performance on the camera? Cuz with 50 megapixels, the photo sites are going to be really small. I think it was 500 megapixels.
00:00:06
500 megapixel main sensor. It's bending down to 50. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No notes. No notes. Yeah. Okay. You know, Alex, um I love what you're putting down, but I
00:00:19
think without a Philadelphia 76ers integration, I I just don't think I could co-sign this, you know. That's
00:00:24
okay. I was really just here for it. That's Yeah. The the headline the headline Marquez Brownley
00:00:29
single-handedly resurrects LG Mobile is that's going to hit, man. That's what I'm thinking.
00:00:35
[Music] Yo, what is up people of the internet? Welcome back to another episode of the Waveform Podcast. This is not your regularly scheduled programming. We'll
00:00:46
be back to that on Friday. Today is Wednesday or Tuesday or Tuesday. Could be a couple things. Could be any day. Other don't don't check your watch. It's a It is a Waveform podcast though. And
00:00:57
uh yeah, this is a bonus episode. So sir, we're your hosts for this episode. I'm Marquez. I'm Andrew. And I'm Ellis
00:01:02
at the big table. Yeah. So that's how you know this is going to be a good episode. Oh yeah. No slight against
00:01:08
David. I hope he doesn't take that as a slight. Okay, we're ready. So do you guys watch Shark Tank at all? I do watch
00:01:13
Shark Tank. Okay. Ellis doesn't. Andrew does. I do. Uh are you familiar with the
00:01:18
concept? Uh vaguely. It's it's Mark Cuban and the other guy and and and really passionate people come up and they say, "I have this idea and I need
00:01:30
your help." And then they scheme and they go, "How much of that can be mine?" Yeah. Yeah. It's a It's almost like a
00:01:36
symbolism for the American dream, but also fast forwarded and and cut up and it's it's an entrepreneur with a
00:01:42
business or a product or some idea that they're pitching to this investor and how they can collaborate to make it happen. I believe one of my favorite
00:01:49
products was a Shark Tank product. Scrub Daddy. Scrub Daddy. Yeah. What's your favorite part? Which Well, Scrub It was.
00:01:54
Now Scrub Daddy has been ruined by Unilever. Yeah. Now it's like a It's just the same as any other sponge. But
00:02:00
back in the heyday of Scrubbing. Yeah. King. No, that's that's perfect. That that is a quintessential Shark Tank
00:02:07
success story. It's something that got brought to the masses. It was shown on TV. It got the investment. It got the
00:02:12
collaboration. And the partnership was beautiful. Today on Waveform, we're going to be playing our own little version of Shark Tank. Now, we're not we're not investing per se, so we're
00:02:23
kind of doing a little twist on the formula if you want to explain it, but it is still kind of like Shark Tank for us. Yeah. So, last summer, Eric came up
00:02:30
with this idea called studio pitches and they were going to have it's four people that will be on today. four of them made
00:02:38
up a I believe tech product hopefully tech most likely tech product um to then pitch to a panel that was going to be on the studio channel and we had at that time David Federiel
00:02:50
our intern create some I haven't seen them yet but it sounds like some really really good mock-ups this is not just a
00:02:56
like idea and they pitch it to us there are visual representations of these ideas and this was a year ago this the
00:03:03
video never got made and we were like wow he spent a lot of time on that and They were really good. We should revive
00:03:08
this. We needed a bonus episode for this month. So, we are turning into a podcast. So, the rules of today are
00:03:14
going to be each person is going to come in. They're going to pitch us their product. Us three are going to be the
00:03:21
shark investors, but since we don't have money and we're just going to then after
00:03:26
pitch to them why we would be the correct partner for them. Yeah. Um, so we will have to think of ideas on maybe
00:03:32
how to market it, maybe where it could prevail. like we have to prove to them that we can make their item a success.
00:03:38
Yeah. So, it's like upside down Shark Tank. The investor or sorry, the entrepreneur, which is our guests, will
00:03:44
come in with a product that they've made up. Mhm. And then we have to figure out how to convince them that we're the
00:03:50
right partner. Correct. Cool. Okay. I think I get it. Yeah. You know, I don't know a lot about investing, but uh if
00:03:56
there's one thing I've learned from reading VC tweets on Twitter, it's that the key to being a good tech venture
00:04:03
capitalist is feeling like you are the most important person in the world and what you do, investing, is the most
00:04:09
herculean and impossible task. So, I think we should all just self arandise a little bit and uh and get ready to change some lives. Ellis is literally eating birthday cake at 11:00 a.m. this
00:04:19
morning, which feels like the most most like Lord and Peasant thing we could be doing. So, he's in yellow cake. I kind
00:04:26
of want some. I'm going to have some later. It looks really good. Is it good? Um, you know, it's been sitting on a counter for a full day, so Oh, okay. I
00:04:33
mean, it's that's not that bad. Not that bad. I mean, it's it's birthday cake. All right. All right. So, we have four
00:04:39
contestants coming in. Yeah. Let's jump right in. Let's do it. Dope. Are you hearing all that cricket?
00:04:50
Welcome to the Lion's Den, Eric. It's always funny cuz Eric can't hear the Lion Tank, but you knew the Lion's Den. Dragon I was trying to make a joke. I was hoping someone would be like, "No, it's not the Lion's Den. It's the Shark
00:05:00
Tank." Oh, the Lion's Den. There's a Canadian version called Dragon Shark Tank called Dragon's Den. Oh, welcome to
00:05:07
the Eel Pit area. That's really good. Hello, gentlemen. How are we? Great. We're good. Are we feeling middle class today by any chance? Never. Are we feeling He's eating birthday cake. He's
00:05:19
eating birthday cake out of a cash app mug. If this isn't If this isn't wealth, I don't know what is. I do, Ellis. I do
00:05:27
know what wealth is. You know what's cooler than one piece of birthday cake? Show me. A billion pieces of birthday
00:05:32
cake. I'm listening. All right, let's go. It's tech bro time. All right, so I'd like to give a little behind the scenes. I'm Eric. I'm the, you know, I'm the one of the producers on the studio
00:05:44
channel. This was originally a concept for the studio channel that we were going to do this time last year. We were pre-proing it. And so before we dig in,
00:05:52
we need to all take ourselves back to a simpler time. Mhm. 2024. Just for our audio listeners, the first slide of your presentation says, "Eric saves Google."
00:06:03
Yeah. The next slide says, "Welcome to 2024. I need to just set the stage. We're all just going to remember what it was like to be alive in 2024. Brat was topping the charts. Brain X. Our video
00:06:16
on the Brain X was universally loved with no critiques whatsoever. No hate. Um, as was our coverage of the Tesla
00:06:23
Cybert truck, Apple Vision Pro, Humane AI pin, and Rabbit R1 and cultural phenomenas like the film challengers and the two guys doing the boom stuff equally valuable. They they dominated
00:06:36
culture. Okay. Oh, thanks. the the the Zeitgeist of the world is on this one slide. If you're an audio listener,
00:06:42
you're not witnessing the beauty of the zeitgeist. There was something happening though. While while the rest of the
00:06:47
world was in party mode, Google was in panic mode. Google a Google's AI efforts were uh were pretty bad last year. I think wasn't great. Last year's Google uh Google IO was like boring. Yeah, it
00:07:00
was really it was it was awkward. It was cringe. It was cringe. It was really cringe. It was cringe, gentlemen. It was
00:07:06
It was pretty weird. And while all of this was happening, there was great progress happening. Open AI and Apple
00:07:12
announced a partnership to integrate ChatGBT into Apple experiences. That was going to come that's that's coming in early 2020 25 because it's currently
00:07:19
2024. That's coming in early 2025. By January, Apple will clearly have an excellent AI suite. So, so there's this existential risk to Google because Google pays billions of dollars to Apple
00:07:30
to make sure that they're the default search engine on Apple phones. If Siri integrated with Open AI and the future
00:07:37
of search is going to look more and more like an LLM, that is an existential risk. How is Google going to access some
00:07:42
of the most valuable consumers in the world? Google needs this to work. They need AI, their efforts in AI to work because if they don't, there's potential
00:07:53
existential risk here. Billions of dollars. And if we lose Google, who's to say that we don't lose the White House
00:08:00
now? is a fair point. Oh my god. So, we need to reach the wealthy. We need to reach rich people. And if there's one thing I know about rich people, it's that they
00:08:11
love Google products and they love AI hardware. Yeah. Yeah. Right. So, gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you Oh my god. What is this? To the Gemini Home
00:08:22
3D. Oh no. Uh I think the the best place here right now is just for you guys to maybe describe this to our audio listeners. Yeah. So, I'm seeing like an upside down jug and it has the two of
00:08:37
the eye emojis and the lip emoji in between them all in one straight line. It's It's like the um Do you know the
00:08:44
the fans you get that have LEDs on them so when they spin they can spell things out? There's a center column. I think
00:08:50
that's actually what's powering the display. Am I correct? Yes. Yeah. Mhm. What is this? It's a volutric display. is in fact a
00:09:02
volutric Jesus. So, so what Google can do here is they can integrate Gemini into the Google Home experience, completely revamp it, but add something that's visual, almost like taking
00:09:13
elements of the Pixel tablet experience, but making it way less practical and not portable at all. So, the way that this
00:09:20
tech works is you have a fan in the center with different LEDs in it. And because it's spinning so quickly, it can
00:09:26
create the illusion of depth and actually create a 3D image. When you pair that with Google's excellent
00:09:31
potential for AI video generation and image generation because they can train data off of videos like this without our
00:09:38
consent, then you can actually have this really immersive excellent experience that Google could uniquely compete on.
00:09:44
So this strengthen this strengthens the ecosystem for especially Americans who this is predominantly experience the the AI hardware experience through the lens of Apple right now. Um, it helps boost
00:09:57
internal morale at Google because who wouldn't want to make something like this? Like everyone would be like, "We're so cool." You know, this is
00:10:03
probably the most important thing that Google's ever launched since Google Hangouts. And then it's just objectively
00:10:09
amazing. So yeah, what what are our questions on the future of AI hardware? This This is good. This is really nice.
00:10:16
I wonder So it's going to run Gemini, I assume, and move on from Google Assistant. Yeah. I mean, until they name it something else. Oh yeah, we you know there's barred somewhere in there. Are
00:10:27
there any plans to recover some of the functions of Google Assistant and move them into this Gemini box? There's
00:10:35
definitely plans. Okay, great. I love hearing that. Yeah, there's so many. There's plans everywhere. What is the pixel density of the uh the Pixel 9 Pro?
00:10:43
The Pixel 9 Pro integrates perfectly. What What you could use the entire Pixel suite. Why would someone choose this box with eyes over a box without eyes? Why
00:10:56
would someone choose this box with eyes over a box without eyes? That's correct. I think that's a great question. I think
00:11:01
the key to understanding why people gravitate towards eyes is really to understand the humanity behind the
00:11:07
technology which is I mean look at the thing. All right. Follow-up question. I see you
00:11:13
have a distinct orange two-tone orange and cream base with a sort of old school style speaker grill that sort of implies a design partnership with Teenage Engineering.
00:11:26
Is this the case? Yeah, we had an intern design this. He's fired. David did not get fired. Internship ended. Okay. All right. I'm
00:11:38
I'm still not quite understanding the value proposition, Eric. I'm I understand smart home LLM integration
00:11:46
fine and dandy, right? But you know, Volutric Display, this thing is going to be expensive. I don't understand how
00:11:51
you're an investor and I'm saying AI and you're not on board throwing money at it. I can't help but feel like these gentlemen right here would be excellent partners who really want to win this
00:12:03
deal. And if you're skeptical, I completely understand. But maybe you should go chat with the folks at Soft
00:12:08
Bank or maybe Adam Newman with Wei Work or I heard Elizabeth Holmes is raising a
00:12:13
new We we here we here at Spruce Capital at B17Z, we only invest in the worst, most useless products. Okay. And this seems like a perfect candidate. I just need you to explain to me a little
00:12:25
further why this thing is so bad. Yeah, I think that makes perfect sense. It's not bad. It's act this is this has
00:12:30
potential to fundamentally change the way that humans interact with technology. I'm listening. Say more. I see that. I see more buzzwords.
00:12:38
Yes. They're inter because they're interacting language models, machine learning. I think we What is Do we have
00:12:44
a size of this? I need to be able to fit this into every single room inside of the average household. And are there
00:12:51
other color options? Because yeah, so absolutely very flexible in terms of the color way. And the the beauty of this is because it's a density of LEDs, the vast
00:13:02
majority of the visuals are essentially entirely modular, right? You can fundamentally change this, especially once you have generative AI, you can
00:13:09
change this as much as you want. We can integrate cameras, scan your room, look at everything that's happening, and then
00:13:15
perfectly make it blend almost like a like a chameleon in your home. So, if you don't want to see it, it spins
00:13:20
around. It just looks like the wall, but then you know what? You want to you want to photo your family and boom, it's right there. It can it can tell that
00:13:27
your in-laws are coming in and you don't like them. It can have a little emergency button says beep beep beep and
00:13:32
you can run away. It can just see that. So, a a big a big, you know, pitch of Google's 2024 AI initiative was AI LLM
00:13:40
and AI can take care of the one like super annoying thing no one wants to do. Raise your children. Exactly. You know, so LLM can can do their home with their homework. It can teach them valuable
00:13:51
life lessons. So, as someone who has literally no interest in raising my children, what where does this thing
00:13:58
step in? So, children are inherently visual. There's actually a lot of studies that find that there's there's
00:14:04
there's a lot of studies that Right. Because previously, if I wanted it to do help my children with their homework, it
00:14:09
would generate a podcast, right? Podcast. 30-year-olds like podcast. Exactly. Exactly. There are no children
00:14:15
listening to this right now. Never once. Nope. Mhm. I mean, maybe the child of a 30-year-old, but in a car somewhere. In
00:14:22
a car somewhere. We're talking to you. Turn on Coco Melon. Anyway. Yeah. So, so visually like the
00:14:29
this volutric display will be able to come up with a a sprite perhaps. Yeah. So, children before the age of four can't distinguish the difference between fiction and reality. So, you could actually use this to fundamentally alter
00:14:41
a child's perception of reality. I'm listening. All right, Eric. Can these be linked up
00:14:47
to create stereo sound? Oh, that is a fantastic question. I'm going to say yes, despite never thinking about this. It's Yeah, very Google answer there. Uh,
00:14:57
no, I like that. I like I think I So, I think I'd be the perfect partner for this. And I'll tell you why. Uh, I've
00:15:04
been primed up to throw away all of my morals and partner with the tech company on something in a category I've already
00:15:11
reviewed. So, fresh off the heels of murdering other standalone AI devices, it would be a great opportunity for me to totally flip everything and shock everyone and partner up here and and
00:15:24
bring this to the masses. This is a way to get eyeballs. I like the thing you said about morals. That was good. Yeah. No, we don't we toss those out. I like
00:15:30
that. I like that. That's good. Gentlemen, what are what are your pitches? Do you have birds? I got
00:15:39
I do I do like the idea that playing anything over a screen this could be a house plant to blind in my TV console to take care of a plant. Exact Exactly. Um
00:15:51
so it can fit in anything. I do I you know the fact that El thought of the teenage engineering almost makes me
00:15:58
think he might be the better partner cuz he's Teenage Engineering immediately lets you put a 45% margin on top of
00:16:04
this. What game are you trying to play here? You're trying to make me go with Alice, which mean which makes me want
00:16:09
you more. That's what I was going for. Yeah. I don't know if I'm the correct partner for this because I do plan on raising my my
00:16:21
children and I think this could start, you know, I think it would be potentially harmful towards my other
00:16:28
investments if I'm the kid who doesn't if I'm the investor that doesn't care about their children. So for that, I'm
00:16:33
out. Wow. Out. Okay. Well, let me tell you why I will be buying 10 of them. Let me tell you why I'm the perfect partner, Eric. Because I'm the only one that sees that the true value in this
00:16:45
product is that it has literally no value whatsoever. And that's why we need to do the most tech VC input thing ever,
00:16:51
which is we need to pivot. We need to pivot hard. We need to pivot fast. This thing is not a home assistant anymore.
00:16:58
That jar, you put a drop of your blood in there and it'll tell you all the diseases you have. healthare. We're
00:17:03
gonna run. We're going to run with that for like a year. Pivot again. Digital currency.
00:17:09
Jarcoin. Jar with eyes coin. So, if you want to go on this wild ride, all you got to do is sign off. You got two offers, right? We could stick with what we've got, right? We'd make waves
00:17:20
in the press for sure. The tweets would be crazy. They'd do crazy numbers. Yes, exactly. Picture the numbers. Yeah, crazy numbers. I mean, cuz all those numbers are only a 1 second
00:17:31
view time on the video, but they are still numbers. They are still numbers. If we just make the first frame a really
00:17:37
good frame, it could be like this is this thing is a content gold mine. Who knows more about content gold mines than
00:17:42
me? Like I could turn this thing into an ad. Okay, being in advertisements as many households as possible, boom, flip the switch. It sells ads. It's everywhere.
00:17:53
Yes, this is a no-brainer. All right, friends money. I'm interested in going. It'd be really interesting if you did
00:18:00
all of the ads. Like if there was a little AI Marquez and you pop up in people's homes and you're like, maybe
00:18:05
you should maybe you should buy underwear today. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I would sell out. I would be the voice
00:18:12
behind it. Everyone got my voice and my eyes. All of America. Yeah, dude. Giant Marquez eyes in between Marquez lips. We're going to get this thing in front of millions of
00:18:25
people. Yeah, this is this is for sure a match in heaven. I like I definitely like the idea of going after healthcare
00:18:31
and then pivoting to just becoming a currency and then and then insolveny. The blood testing thing, it worked so
00:18:37
well for Elizabeth Holmes. Not only did she never face any repercussions whatsoever, but she's doing it again.
00:18:43
Yeah. You know, I think the question is, do I want to be a villain in America or do I want to be a villain and then flee
00:18:49
America? You're not thinking big enough. Do you want to be a villain in America or do you want to be a villain in prison?
00:18:55
M. All right. I think I'm going to be America's next big villain. Sharks. I'm going with Marquez. Pleasure doing
00:19:02
business with you. Pleasure. I missed this one. Pleasure. Thank you very much. Oh, wow. That's a
00:19:09
really good render. I hate to say I probably would actually buy this if this was just like a Google Home that I could
00:19:15
like have stuff on top of it. I love when I see like a rabbit stacked on top of like a dock or something. It does look like a rabbit with a jug, but I'm sure it's bigger than the rabbit. We
00:19:26
have another genius, innovative in inventor coming soon. But first, we need a quick word from our investors, aka the people who sponsor this podcast. So, we'll be right back
00:19:39
after this quick break. [Music] All right, welcome back. Up next, Vin and his pitch.
00:20:01
Hello, sharks. And hello, Vin. He's got something under a cloak here. Whoa, a physical prop. Or is it the cloak? Oh, I thought it was the I think most people have a presentation, but I
00:20:13
have for you today a physical prop. Oh, okay. Not just a prototype, it's final production. Oh, final production. Okay. This is gold. It's under a gold uh
00:20:24
cloak, I would say, of sorts. Fabulous. Yes. Welcome. Welcome to the Wait, I can't hear you yet. Oh, welcome to the eel pit. My my voice only goes in there. There you go. Welcome to
00:20:35
the eel pit. Uh, take it away. Tell us about your your product or your company. Well, you know, we all have something important going on in our lives. Andrew,
00:20:47
you have a kid. I do. Marquez, you're an athlete. You play ultimate frisbee. This is a fact. Adam,
00:20:55
you collect a lot of cool watch. He's not an investor. Forget about him. But I just wanted to include him. You got to be nice. Thank you. Uh
00:21:03
Ellis with the Mc Vibes. The uh with the weird camera brands. This is true. You're a weird weird cameraman guy. I'm a weird guy. And so I think we need to
00:21:14
capture the moments around us. Uh sometimes people do it. I can see what with photos. Well, how about video? Oh. Mhm.
00:21:26
Mhm. Maybe uh you're shooting something crazy like uh weddings or F1 races or even
00:21:35
birds. So, uh, Marquez, I'm gonna have you, uh, do the grand reveal. Okay, perfect. I will do that. I thought it was Astrobot at first. It could be. It still could
00:21:47
be. Introducing the Ned Nonstro 8K. Nice. Nice. Um, I don't think you've seen that logo before. Like, it's it's a
00:22:00
new company. Brand new. You guys have heard of Nikon? This is uh Nikon. Nikon, right? Yeah. Australians like to say it
00:22:06
that way. This is Ned. It's a beautiful cam camera. I believe it is designed. This is a a video camera, but it's the 8K is good enough that you can take stills from it. You mean 8K?
00:22:20
Yes. Perfect. You want to be You want to be on the team? You trying to be an investment? I think I was made for this project, bro. I think I got one. Oh my
00:22:27
god. Okay. So, for audio listeners uh who can't see, we have a very carefully modified red Monstro. No, no, no,
00:22:35
no. Excuse me. We have a totally stock straight from factory Ned Nonstro where a uh where you would normally find an R, it has been carefully replaced, excuse me, not replaced, created from scratch
00:22:48
with an N in place. Correct. Um is that uh is that is that white Sharpie? Is that is that crayon? Silver Sharpie. Silver Sharpie. Tasteful. It's a familiar body style,
00:23:01
but I don't think anyone has made something quite like this yet. Clearly not. Yeah. Yeah. No, no, I like this a
00:23:08
lot. So, I shoot a lot with um I forgot the name. This other camera that I use uh doesn't matter, but like blue or
00:23:15
something. Yeah. Something some color, whatever. But like I'm I'm very familiar with this world and so I see a lot of a
00:23:21
lot of useful parallels here. Uh what kind of what kind of mount is on this actually? Uh it's actually a Zmount.
00:23:26
It's um based off of the research, it is the most used um lens mount that we have
00:23:31
found. I like research. It can come with a PDL mount if you're an amateur. Okay. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, I like
00:23:37
that. Uh material choices, I mean, this thing is rock solid. It looks like there's carbon fiber everywhere. There's
00:23:43
metal. Carbon is my favorite. I think that's a that's a really important distinction here. Uh yeah. Ooh, media
00:23:49
wise SSDs. Is that what's happening over here? Yeah, they uh use magazines. Magazines. Magazines. Nice. Yeah, I'm liking what I'm seeing. So, if right off the bat, I got to ask, you know, uh,
00:24:01
with traditional box style cameras like this, like birds, out of the question. Never going to happen. As soon as a bird
00:24:08
sees that camera, it's running for the hills. No, it it it thinks it's a bird house. It thinks it's a bird. Yeah, exactly. It's meant to blend in with the
00:24:14
environment. So, but I I got to ask, what's up with autofocus on this bad boy? Because that is essential to
00:24:21
shooting birds. It has Zmount. The focus. Autofocus. Autofocus. Yeah, the not. That's what it has. It has the I think it has the not part pretty down
00:24:33
pretty good. Not focus. Yeah, I think that satisfies your your question. Yeah, totally. I have a couple questions. In
00:24:39
the um competitor scene, a lot of things that plagues that scene are slow boot up
00:24:46
times, uh bad not faulty ports, but poor working ports, HDMI, you know, for external monitors not good. The range of accessories are very expensive. Is is this doing anything to solve those
00:24:58
issues? Uh, actually, it's a feature. Um, because, you know, if you pick up a camera and it doesn't work, it's basically like an anti- theft system built into itself. That it probably also
00:25:11
could be an anti- theft system in the fact of it is the weapon to prevent the theft. Yes. Of itself. Yes. Easily
00:25:18
convertible. Yeah. You'll get some really good looks at TSA. So, uh, pricing wise, what are we looking at? How does it fit in with its competitors? You know,
00:25:31
pricing is based off of a subscription model, actually. So, uh, we went with the Adobe approach. Genius. This is going to be such a profitable product. I
00:25:42
I really think you've set yourself up for success, Finn. It's got the It's got the uh there's branding everywhere.
00:25:48
There really is branding everywhere. Every time I look at it, I find new branding opportunities and I I feel like
00:25:53
they're fully capitalized on. You can check the bottom, too. Let's check the bottom. Yeah. Oh, yes. Ned Digital
00:25:59
Cinema. Correct. Just rings just rolls right off the tongue. I like it. I'd like to step in as my first pitch for why I should be your partner for this. I think every I mean, everything
00:26:13
is covered here. This is a triedand-true model. all we really I mean like the easiest way forward here even though one
00:26:19
of my partner uh not partner um competitor investors is big in the YouTube scene and has made cameras like this popular we don't need him anymore it's it's very obvious to get to the the
00:26:30
influencer market we just need some some good strategy for that what we the way I
00:26:35
think we could really make some money here is there's one thing that is not on brand and that is the Vmount we need to
00:26:42
create endmount I think you're right I think a proprietary a proprietary endmount battery with half the size,
00:26:50
twice the price and it's pretty hard to not shoot for the moon at that point. I like that that is my pitch to you. I think it is a great idea. Maybe they'll have some mount end mount with like 50
00:27:04
mm flange distance that you can't use any lens even if with an adapter. It's out of the question. Flange is a good
00:27:10
word. Yes, we like that. So, I meant for the battery, not for the lens. But we could also We could flange anything you
00:27:16
want. Yeah. The battery has a flange distance. The cards have a flange distance. Picture that. An SD card
00:27:22
that's that's like 60 60 in long. Yes. All right. But let me tell you why I'm the man for the job here. Okay. When
00:27:29
people think Ellis Roven, they think nonsense. I'm known for my nonsense, but I'm also I'm not known for my other
00:27:36
amazing qualities like lolly gagging, faffing about, tom foolery. Those are big words. All of which I think are qualities in this camera. I think I
00:27:47
embody everything this camera is about, which is being totally worthless and very silly. So, it's it's a no-brainer
00:27:54
having me on this project cuz the innate qualities that make me me will be able to communicate to the consumer what this
00:28:00
whole thing is about. In fact, I think I already am Nellis. I think I I ceased being Ellis years ago. for quite some time. I would to to take
00:28:12
this on. See, that's that's where I stepped in cuz I I think I would be the perfect partner here because the
00:28:18
branding opportunity is so obvious. When you turn around this camera and you see NE, everyone is going to remember that,
00:28:26
especially the N. And I think I've been associated with an acronym for so long that it presents a beautiful rebranding
00:28:33
opportunity, NKBHD. Ah, you're Narz. And from that moment on, I will be intertwined, associated permanently with this brand and this camera. And I can push it to the masses. I promise you.
00:28:46
It's true. And it's not, you know, you haven't been permanently associated with a camera brand yet. Like this is the
00:28:51
opportunity. This is I don't know if I can compete with that. Yeah. Canon could never. Yeah, I don't think so. Nan
00:28:58
doesn't roll off the tongue. Doesn't work. Doesn't work. But this is the rebrand that it deserves. Does it work in Final Cut?
00:29:04
Uh proprietary software. M crashy hopefully. Uh only on Wednesdays. Nice. Yeah, I'm in. I mean, I'm used to that. That's perfect. It's a timed crash. It's a Right. Taking taking
00:29:19
account. Yeah, we all we all need rest. You know, everyone has a sleep schedule and I think cameras could also have a
00:29:26
sleep schedule. I'm I'm really into that. You know, people always say electric cars, they don't have enough range, but the human body can only go so
00:29:31
far driving before it needs to pull over. And I think that's also true about editing. I should have a timed out crash
00:29:38
every 12 to 45 seconds. And that's the type of thing that sort of eliminates fatigue, keeps you refreshed. You jump back in, Final Cut starts again. Good work life balance right there. It's good. It's good. Repetition is the
00:29:51
fastest way to expertise. And if you have to redo the last 10 cuts before auto saved over and over and over again,
00:29:57
you're going to be an expert in no time. You you've really like hit the nail on the head, Vin. Like there is this
00:30:02
problem in the camera landscape, bird cinematography specifically, I think. Well, well, I think there's just a problem with the camera landscape in general where they're all too good. Like
00:30:12
like and consumers are asking, they're like, I want a bad camera that doesn't dumb things down. Where is that bad
00:30:19
camera that doesn't work? And here you are about to bring it to market. No notes. Yeah.
00:30:26
So, you've got three offers on the table, Vin. Uh, which which direction would you like to go? Can I phone in a
00:30:32
friend? Why not? Adam, Adam, chat, what do we do? Can I take like a little bit of all
00:30:39
three? Is that leg? Is that a legal move? That's happened on Shark Tank. We're all partnering. You're allowed to
00:30:44
pick more than one partner. What? Yeah. Like some polygamous type. You can you can just you can combine them all if you think if you think we'd work together.
00:30:57
Well, that would be up to you. America the Beautiful. You know what? I'm taking all three. Perfect. Three
00:31:04
offers accepted. Yeah. Boom. That's the first on. We all agree NED 2 is just a smaller box that uses AI to create all of the video. Absolutely. For sure. AI integration is a very good uh Yeah, I
00:31:18
think we're we're great good market. We are we are positioned for the future, gentlemen. It's been a pleasure. Thank
00:31:23
you, partner. Hands now as well. or you know we're far away but it does the deal doesn't count
00:31:30
unless you shake hands. Oh yeah. You know you obviously haven't watched you have to. Yeah. This is a big part of
00:31:35
securing securing the bag. An anime sword sound right here. And that makes it official. Three for three. Incredible. All right. Thank you very much. Thank you very much. We will
00:31:47
move on for our next contestant. Please never take that tape off. All right. Next up, Alex.
00:31:59
Oh, this is an intense music. I've never seen Shark Tank, so this is what I just I like listened to a few seconds of the music and was like, "This is kind of it." It's
00:32:10
not as intense. This feels more Dragon's Denny, even though I've never seen Dragons Den, but just calling Dragons
00:32:15
Den for sure. Alex, welcome to the tank. The eel, we appreciate it's electric in here. Hey, I'm in. I'm out. I'm all in. 100%
00:32:29
of the business, please. All right. Walk us through it. What have you What are you presenting to us today?
00:32:34
All right. So, let me pull up a little presentation here. Perfect. In a world where companies keep trying to make our phones minimal. Mhm. Are you saying this cuz I literally have the minimal phone
00:32:46
on? No. This has been in the works for well before you decide to make a video about it. This is hilarious. But we've
00:32:52
seen the light phone light. Who wants that? The BS Palma. Hey, that's goated. You're You're going to hate this. Oh, no. I don't need your money, pal.
00:33:06
The Palm Phone. Yeah, less goated, right? And whatever that is. The Punk. I've never even heard of that. I hadn't either. I had to find a fourth phone, though. to dump
00:33:18
on. Companies have been trying to make our our lives more minimal. And that's when Well, you know
00:33:25
what? Let me let me show you guys a little something first. I I think we need to go the other direction. Mhm. We
00:33:30
need to start maximizing our content consumption. And and many places have tried and failed. We had the
00:33:38
Red Hydrogen One could have been the best consumption device ever. It had 3D or something. I have fond memories of that. Yeah, great great device. We had the Surface Duo. Another question. Two
00:33:50
whole screens, but didn't didn't quite nail it. Not quite. We've got the Huawei. What is
00:33:58
this? The Mate XT. That is the triple triple folding phone. We're getting closer. We're getting warmer. Uh-huh.
00:34:04
Okay. But we're not quite there. I see a trend here. And then, of course, the most beautiful baby. Oh, wow. The LG Wing. Yeah. for maximizing consumption,
00:34:15
but still not quite there. But that it is funny that I should bring that up because
00:34:21
a longlost hero is ready to emerge from the depths from their premature death. And that is a fire. There's a Oh,
00:34:33
we're back and better than ever. I am a top secret operative sent here by LG to pitch you on the latest in phone technology because LG is ready to make their return after far too long on the
00:34:46
sidelines. Five five years by my count. Oh yeah. This is 2024 AI. This has been sitting around for a year. This is good. All right. Uh so funny. So without further ado, I would like to introduce
00:35:00
after three very long periods after the introducing the LG Maximalist phone. Whoa. It's time to it's time to stop minimizing and start maxing. Red are so
00:35:14
crazy. It has a dynamic island on the back of the phone. Or it has cameras on the front of the phone. Yeah, true. It might have both.
00:35:25
Let's wait and see. Ready? Let's talk about it. So, tell me about this maximalist phone. So, what are phones?
00:35:30
Well, we got to we got to get existential first. What are phones in 2025? An iPod, a phone, an internet
00:35:37
communicator? No, they're not. Not anymore. Then what are they? Phones are literally everything. Oh, that's true. They're our way of communicating with the world. Yes.
00:35:52
They're how we do our jobs. often true. They're our camera to take and preserve beautiful memories. Factual. They're the place where we go to leave mean comments on YouTube videos often while pooping
00:36:06
several times today. They're our brains. Uhhuh. They're our creativity. Oh my god. GPT app. They're our best friends. This is a
00:36:18
joke, but like we get emails that are not that far off phone companies. Like maybe it was for me. You don't know. I might be consulting. They're also our
00:36:29
lovers sometimes. Anyway, but as a society, we're too far gone to remove ourselves from our phones. Without our phones, we
00:36:42
would literally die. Mhm. Literally. in red. So, what we need to do is get more involved in our phones. We don't need
00:36:53
less. We need the LG Maximalist phone. So, I'm going to tell you all about it. Yeah. Please tell me what makes this so
00:36:59
maximal. So, we're building here at LG on a history of adequacy and engineering. I just want our audio listeners to know the pauses in this is because every piece of text blurs into
00:37:11
the presentation and Alex did this a year ago. Let me remind you of such great and
00:37:18
adequate phones is the LG Double Play from 2011. That's real. That's a real phone. That's incredible. Wait, this is a phone with a split keyboard, a slide up, and an extra app screen in the
00:37:30
middle of the split keyboard. Before Android, I think even Oh, that is Android. That one is Android. Yeah, it's
00:37:36
like Android 3 or 4. But what about also the LG G8X Thin Q from 2019? What a beautiful feat of engineering that was. And then of course in Marquez's hands right now, the LG wing from 2020. We
00:37:50
need to do a revisit LG video. Sorry. We did already do that. Check out the studio channel. Smart dead smartphone
00:37:56
tier list video. Thank you. Fair. All right. Next. Oh, which is where MKBHD gave that phone a C tier big big time for the uh aftermarket sales of LG
00:38:08
Wings. So, what is a maximalist phone? So, it's everything you've ever dreamed of doing on your phone in one place.
00:38:15
Gambling. It's the Yes, of course. It's the only device you'll ever need. It's your all-in-one entertainment solution.
00:38:21
It is the most productive device ever. Your all knowing AI friend and the Maximus phone guarantees that you will never have more fun spending entire days glued to your phone screen, as we all
00:38:32
should be. Thank you, production. So, this is the LG Maximalist phone. Oo, rounded corners. It's got a 6.9 in display. Very nice. Nice. It's got the Snapdragon 10 Elite. We dr we jumped two
00:38:46
whole dragons for this phone just for you guys. 2 TB of RAM. 10 TB of onboard storage. A 500 megapixel main cam, 40 megapixel telephoto, 100 megapixel
00:38:59
periscope telephoto. Take that, Samsung. And a 25 megapixel selfie cam. All powered by a 3,250 MIA enormous battery. But that's
00:39:10
just a rectangle. It's just a rectangular phone. For those for those listening, not watching, just just looks
00:39:16
like a phone. It's pretty boring. Mhm. There's got to be more to this, right? That's where you fold this baby out and
00:39:22
in partnership with Tik Tok. Oh my god. You can now have Tik Tok running on your
00:39:27
lefthand screen and keep being productive on your right hand screen. Because if you've ever worried that you
00:39:33
can't content max while you're oversharing your entire life to your 347 Tik Tok followers, you don't have to
00:39:38
worry about that anymore. You can live very attacked right now. I have a quick question. Yes. Uh
00:39:45
assuming I literally could not care about being productive whatsoever. Sure. Could I just have two Tik Tok separate
00:39:51
feeds on each screen and like sort of scroll them separately with my two thumbs? Like you could have two Tik Toks. You know, I'm not legally allowed
00:39:59
to say this thanks to our contract, but you could even have YouTube shorts on one and Tik Tok on the other or perhaps
00:40:05
Instagram, but maybe we'll get to that in a little bit. Interesting. Interesting. Interesting. Uh, but what about your many successful businesses?
00:40:11
If you do want to be productive, there needs to be more room for productivity because you might want to I was going to say you're stopping at two screens. You
00:40:18
have no faith in this presentation. You don't because that's where our next feature comes in in partnership with
00:40:24
Microsoft 365. We've added our third screen which gives you everything you need. Word processing, calendars, emails, presentation software. You can have a
00:40:35
very mid adequate version of all of them in one with the Microsoft 365 suite, our
00:40:42
exclusive partner for productivity on the LG Maximalist phone. So, you could be Tik Tocking, you can be texting, and you can be emailing, be teamsing. You could be, let me tell you, we're excited
00:40:55
to announce, Ellis. Oh, no. That these Microsoft Teams is the official messaging partner
00:41:08
of Maximalist phone. You're really, you're really pushing the adequatess of this phone. This is going to be the most
00:41:14
adequate giant phone you've ever had in your life. Yeah, let me tell you. So, Microsoft Teams, you ever we want you to
00:41:20
be part of our team and that's why we've made Teams the official messaging partner of the LG Maximalist phone. But
00:41:28
it's not quite enough yet because we have an homage to our sweet baby, the LG Wing. You fold out that fourth screen on
00:41:36
the bottom. For those of you listening and not watching, we now have three screens. One, two, three. with a fourth
00:41:42
one that folds out from the bottom in the center. Does it fold out or swing out? Something like that. We're figuring
00:41:49
it out. That's a great question. I'm glad you asked it. Anyway, uh so you fold out the fourth screen and suddenly
00:41:55
you're in LG Wing mode. You if you just like you've ever looked at your phone and you're like, "Man, I wish I could be
00:42:01
watching a full screen video up top here while I'm texting and being productive on the bottom." Well, here you go. You
00:42:06
don't have to worry about that anymore with LG Wing Mode on the LG Maximalist phone. But typing on a screen, it's very P. It's very 20110s of us to be typing
00:42:19
on a screen. So that's why we have a best-in-class exclusive collaboration with Blackberry with a nice little slide out keyboard from that bottom screen. Now you can tap out messages to your
00:42:31
heart's content on those sweet little chicklets. get all those emails, important texts, everything out. Mean
00:42:37
YouTube comments, whatever. The center of gravity on this thing is wild by the time it's amazing. Yeah. For those for
00:42:43
audio listeners, just to keep you up to we have three a row of three screens on top and then one center screen on a
00:42:50
bottom row that sort of forms a Thor's hammer type shape. And then below that bottom screen is a Blackberry style
00:42:57
keyboard. Exactly. So, if at that point you're typing on the BlackBerry keyboard, you have two thumbs and all of
00:43:02
your weight on the bottom maybe 5% of this phone. Does it come with like a neck strap that you can like attach to like the top? Have faith. It's actually weighted quite well once you see what
00:43:12
else we have in store. It's remarkably balanced. Uh let's let's move on cuz you're still not maximizing your
00:43:19
consumption just yet. And that is where our collaboration with Instagram comes in. two more foldable screens on the bottom, giving you a whopping six total screens of real estate so that you can
00:43:31
view Instagram the way that it's meant to be viewed in Instagram mode. It's the latest and greatest way to rot your brain with endless hours of doom scrolling. You get it just the way Zuck
00:43:42
intended. Nice square form factor, minimal oversight, maximum ability to get yourself addicted to andor buy
00:43:49
things, and it's on the biggest screen you possibly can for Instagram right now. Sounds like a money maker. It is.
00:43:54
And absolutely. That's very important. Very important. Uh this is Shark Tank after or the eel the eel farm or
00:43:59
whatever. Eel. Eel pit. We'll go eel pit. Just go with that. Yeah. All right. But that's still not all because what
00:44:06
about more important things like gaming and movies? Well, the LG Maximus phone has everything you could ever want in a phone. That's right. What we're at 10 screens now. We have 10 full
00:44:20
screen. Is that Is that a Bitcoin ticker on the top of that? is the official Crypto.com ston tracker up top. So
00:44:27
whenever you're doing anything, you can always know that you you can check your stons. Uh is that a Stadia controller?
00:44:33
Sh. Hold on just a moment. I did forget to put a piece of text on the side here and and the producer forgot to bring in
00:44:40
my updated presentation that I sent him. Uh but this totals out to now a 20in screen to watch critically acclaimed movies like The Wild Robot. Uh, great
00:44:51
for all audiences. Anyone who says otherwise, you deserve to get hated on the internet. Uh, next, he's not even
00:44:57
here to defend himself. The Fujifilm X100 LIV pop-up selfie camera. I don't know what those I don't know what those letters mean. They They didn't tell me what number that is, so we're just going
00:45:09
to call it the LI. Actually, no. They're gonna randomly change how this is read now. It's now the X100 Live um pop-up
00:45:17
selfie camera. We made this specially with them to make sure that you have the best pop-up selfie camera just in case
00:45:23
the the stock uh 25 megapixel sensor is not quite enough. And then of course if you want a content max, you need brain audio ear murdering surround sound which
00:45:34
pops out from four parts of the screen on both sides. Ear murdering surround sound to take care of all you there. Then we got the Stadia controller uh
00:45:44
redesigned. Uh it the last one was a little too modern looking. We've we've used the Xbox the Duke controller as our
00:45:51
inspiration for this. Uh perhaps the most Is it that looks like the Discord logo in 3D? It kind of does. Maybe it's
00:45:57
a Discord controller. I think that's just the Discord logo if they made it into an actual controller. Call it that.
00:46:03
Actually, we're selling the rights to Discord as we speak. Thank you for Thank you for bringing that up. Uh Stadia,
00:46:08
you're gone. Discord, you're in. And finally, you might be wondering what those things are at the bottom. Any guesses? Any guesses? Kind of looks like
00:46:15
a Opal webcam. Kind of looks like those like scent that scent box that we had here. A little bit of thinking correctly
00:46:23
cuz this comes with 4DX immersive viewing built into your phone. You never thought you'd be able to smell the Wild Robot, but that oil smell is going to be
00:46:34
coming right in your nose as you're watching. It's going to feel great. So, this is it. We're good. And the best
00:46:39
part is it's infinitely pocketable, weighing in at just four inches thick. Th this phone, a block of chips. This phone is the most pocketable phone
00:46:51
you could ever hope to experience. In your entire life, without further ado, this is the LG Maximalist phone. This is
00:47:00
incredible. I I just want to make sure you partnered with Yeah. Brain, Fujifilm, Crypto.com, Google Stadia,
00:47:07
maybe Discord. We haven't decided. Maybe maybe Discord. Maybe both. Uh Teams, Instagram, Tik Tok. It was a camera one.
00:47:15
Fujifilm. I think I got I think I think that was it. But see, we have we have se eight brand partnerships going on. Yeah.
00:47:21
Is there even room for us at this point? Yeah. Yeah. So, this was my concern actually. I was hoping I would get a
00:47:28
camera partnership and a speaker partnership and we did get that. But each one of those deals actually takes a
00:47:33
little bit off of your bottom line. So, I'm curious how your margins are going to work out giving a few percent to each
00:47:38
of these partners. Whoops. That's a great question and I'm glad you asked it. Yeah. Incredible. Moving on. All
00:47:44
right. So, does anyone else have any questions? Does it have NFC? Yes, of course. Of course. All right. All right.
00:47:51
Well, look, see, I I feel like I'm an interesting candidate because as you know, some people might know, I'm sort of a minimalist phone guy. In fact,
00:47:57
again, once again, I literally I'm literally being tortured by the minimal phone right now as we speak. Um, so as
00:48:03
someone who is afraid of brain rot and maybe needs a little bit of convincing that I should be rotting my brain more,
00:48:11
what would you say to a consumer like that? How would you convince them to uh to melt melt their brain with Zuck's
00:48:17
poison? Think about all the happiest moments in your life. They're all probably on Instagram, obviously, right?
00:48:24
Fair. Good point. Yeah. In fact, I don't think I've ever been happy when not on Instagram. I mean, when are you happy
00:48:30
when you're not consuming content? It's true. It's so true. Why would you go hike in the woods when you could see it in brilliant HDR right in front of your
00:48:37
face? You know, it's funny. When I'm at the movie theater, sometimes I watch the whole movie th through my phone's camera just so I can put it in a vertical
00:48:43
aspect ratio. And then you can like pause it at various times, get minute and a half
00:48:49
consumable bits of the movie. I think that's really the better way to go. Well, look, I'm I'm a huge fan of LG. I
00:48:54
use an LG TV at home that I love. I use a lot of LG products and so this just feels like the next the next big thing.
00:49:02
So I I'm in. I I don't know if I have much to offer as a as a venture capitalist. I mean it seems like frankly
00:49:08
the biggest tech companies in the world are already funding this project. But if you want a goober like me on board, I
00:49:14
mean I'm right here. Look, really we just love money. That's fair. I love that. So more of it is better. Yeah, of
00:49:21
course. Here's where you should choose me. Okay. To my left, we have someone who notably has not been the nicest to folding phones in the past. You know,
00:49:32
some say the Surface Duo. Some people on Reddit might say the Surface Duo is dead because of this man to my left. And wow,
00:49:39
we can't take that risk. He doesn't want to mess up his good name. Go ahead. There's lots of other reviewers out
00:49:45
there who will be out to get us because this is LG, a brand that I love, but I know all of the tech reviewers except
00:49:52
for one or two are out to get LG because they have a personal vendetta against them. No other reason why it could have
00:49:58
failed. Um, yeah. And and and and they failed because of those with a vendetta. Correct. We say that in the office. I'm glad you brought it up. We talk about it often. Yeah. It's a known fact. I like
00:50:09
that we're bringing it back. I have a content strategy for how we bring it to these reviewers. Okay.
00:50:15
37 embargos. Okay. Each one of these screens needs their own embargo. Oh, that's because we need to produce the we need to show the incredible form factor before we show that there could be a
00:50:29
couple, we'll call them hiccups in the software process of this. Lots of different, you know, we've got a lot of
00:50:34
integrations here. Those don't always mesh right away and we probably won't solve those till about four or five
00:50:42
software updates after consumers already have this in their hand. But they don't need to know that and the reviewers don't need but we can promise them that
00:50:47
that we will. Exactly. So we need embargo one is pre-order day. Okay. Straight off the bat. No screens turned on. One fold one screen unfolding
00:50:59
external shots only. Perfect. Yeah. And then we'll slowly unfold each screen one
00:51:05
by one through the embargos. It'll probably be 7 to 8 months worth of embargos before they can do their full review well after the 30-day refund policy.
00:51:18
Good. And that's how we sell this bad boy. And we bring back LG with a vengeance because it is a vengeance to
00:51:25
all the tech reviewers out there who killed them in the first place. I agree. This this whole thing is about revenge. And I'm glad you uh I'm glad you saw
00:51:32
that and um yeah, recognize. Yeah, very good pitch. Would you be willing to go in with me on that deal?
00:51:39
I think, you know, it would be a good uh like comeback story of Marquez being on LG's
00:51:46
good side. Yeah, exactly. That's what I'm thinking. I'm thinking the big headline is that I've changed my tune
00:51:53
and I I I'm a big LG fan. Question. Would you be open to signing a deal where that's put in writing and we can sue you for many millions of dollars if you don't say that? And we don't
00:52:05
disclose that. And we don't disclose that to anybody. Mhm. Nobody can. I would say yes if I also get to add partners as
00:52:16
well. Okay. Yeah. Add as many as you want. You love partnerships. Yeah. Like give me a pitch right now. Who Who do
00:52:21
you know? You got all the I was thinking you could have an AI partner with something like that. I was thinking have a couple other partners in the software
00:52:28
department. Obviously the cameras you can almost stack partnerships. Maybe one partnership for the ultrawide camera,
00:52:33
one partnership for the telephoto camera. We had a 3200 millah battery in there. I think you can get two or three partnerships just on the battery. Fast
00:52:40
charging by OPPO. I think there's a lot of room there. So I'm I'm liking this. I like where you're thinking. I I did have
00:52:45
one partnership question. So, I noticed that the official uh crypto broker of this phone is Crypto.com, who also
00:52:53
happens to be the jersey sponsor of the best basketball team in the Mid-Atlantic Conference. That's a terrible question.
00:52:59
I'm sorry you asked. So, when are we getting the the official Joel Embiid Philadelphia 76ers uh collab
00:53:06
partnership? Unfortunately, unfortunately, that's the the Btier Crypto.com partnership and the
00:53:13
A tier one is the Crypto.com Arena in Los Angeles. Uh we will actually be wrapping the entire Crypto.com arena in
00:53:20
LG Maximus phones though as a promotion. I do I do have one other idea for you know further along in this partnership between us maybe Marquez
00:53:31
we need to look at the budget market and I think there's opportunity for the LG maximalist a okay further down the line
00:53:40
maybe five screens plastic everything we'll take away wireless charging I actually didn't see wireless 7 megapel
00:53:47
camera instead of a 50 I think there's the opportunity the number one rule of the LG Maximus phone is if you if you
00:53:53
are wondering if it has the feature, it does. Does it have a deck? Yeah. Headphone jack. Sure. Stereo speakers.
00:54:00
Abs. Well, you saw. I mean, yeah, absolutely. It is stereo speakers. How's How's the low light performance on the camera? Cuz with 50 megapixels, the
00:54:07
photo sites are going to be really small. I think it was 500 megapixels. 500 megapixel main sensor. It's bending down to 50. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No notes.
00:54:16
No notes. Yeah. Okay. You know, Alex, um I love what you're putting down, but I think without a Philadelphia 76ers integration, I I just don't think I could co-sign this. You know, that's
00:54:28
okay. I was really just here for him. That's Yeah. The headline The headline Marquez Brownley single-handedly
00:54:34
resurrects LG Mobile is That's going to hit, man. That's what I'm thinking. Yeah. Yeah. It's like uh it's like Yeah.
00:54:40
You know what? Never mind. I was trying to think of a movie where someone kills someone and then brings them back to life, but I couldn't. That's a book.
00:54:46
Yeah. I love that book. Yeah. I'm reading it on my minimal phone. Nice. Yeah. No, I'm I'm thinking I'm thinking
00:54:53
we can collab on this. I bring the partnerships and the headlines and the media and the media aspect. I can get
00:55:00
this in front of reviewers. You've got I can hear the strategy coming from from all angles on this phone. I think we can
00:55:05
hit every single feature in every single market. We have a timeline. We can get an A series version out. I think this is
00:55:11
I think the three of us are going to make something pretty magical here. Hey, Ellis here in the future. Sorry for the
00:55:18
interruption, but all of my co-hosts decided to uh use this time to talk smack about the Philadelphia 76ers,
00:55:25
which uh I just can't I can't let happen. You know, this is uh I'm mixing this episode. I get to decide what makes
00:55:30
it in. And so, uh yeah. Anyway, uh back to the show. Thank you. Thank you. I'm slowly realizing that, you know, this is an idea that kind of got thrown together for the podcast. The thing that's the
00:55:44
hardest is they're all tech products and everyone wants Marquez to be their partner for the tech product. All right, we've got another set of partnerships in
00:55:50
the works. That was really fun. We're going to take a quick break and come back with one more from
00:55:57
[Music] Adam. All right, welcome back. Last but not least, we have a presentation, a product from
00:56:17
Adam. Oh, stonefaced. Oh, now I hear the music. Okay. It is weird walking over here to silence, not hearing music. Yeah. Not hearing
00:56:29
anything. Hey, Adam, welcome to the eel pit. I'm ready. We We are all ready for your presentation as well. Yeah, this is this has been a long time coming. Buttons are back, baby. That's what it's
00:56:41
called. I'm interested. I knew you would be, but all right, hear me out. The problem with today's tech, it's too abstract. Everything is hidden behind screens, taps, tones, you know, like
00:56:53
there's no ump anymore. I don't feel anything when I'm using these phones. Proes are all the same color. App UIs
00:57:00
look all the same. We're not using all of our senses with modern technology, you know? We're only using a few of them
00:57:06
like sight and sound. Uh when you tap your screen, it just vibrates to like simulate the motion. We play music out of crappy tiny speakers and think that's okay on subways. But what about all of
00:57:18
our other senses? There's so many other senses. What? I'm just a little confused
00:57:24
because you mentioned sight, sound, and touch. So the other sentences are taste and smell and the sixth sense.
00:57:32
No. Yeah, just taste and smell. It's just that It's actually just that movie. The solution.
00:57:38
Bubbles. Whoa. What? I have bubble wrap for you guys. If you Oh, wait. No, not bubbles. Never mind. Buttons. We want
00:57:44
buttons and switches and knobs. And so I present to you the eye tab. Can you explain what
00:57:51
you are looking at right now? Uh, I see you cannot. Okay. If a normal smartphone is a slab with a glass screen and uh two or three buttons on the
00:58:02
sides, this is a screen surrounded by many buttons, knobs, and switches and and other things. A kickstand, a thermometer, a knob, an antenna, and and
00:58:16
it's it's looking pretty maximal, I might say. Yeah. Quick, let me It's sort of So, it's sort of like
00:58:22
picture kind of looks like a an old school radio, like a old school like portable radio, but there's an EVF on
00:58:31
top. There's a Is that what that looks? There's a there's a compass in the top right. Correct. Then there's like the
00:58:36
dial pad from like a kitchen landline phone. There's a tape transport at the bottom. Uh, is that a physical eject button next to the transport? So, I
00:58:47
we're going to get there cuz I want to know what what you're show that is on the right. There is a full mercury
00:58:52
thermometer. Okay. And a kickstand and then an an antenna sticking out of the top. What if I told you this was just a case? That
00:59:03
screen in the middle is an iPad. It's that big. Or iPad mini. I think like the best does this not look like it would be like if you were playing a video game
00:59:14
like Firewatch or something and you had like the central like menu screen they wanted to make it more immersive. So
00:59:19
like he held this like device up every time you needed to guess. This is what it would look like. Yeah, that that is
00:59:25
how I would describe it. Or like something you ever played the game Astronir. No. All right, great. Cool.
00:59:32
Good story, guys. No, I can already agree with you. Oh, look who knows how to use the sound buttons. Alex is on. Okay. So, this is a case for an iPad. You put the iPad in.
00:59:44
That is the screen right there as Marquez plays with the bubble wrap. All right. And it gives your iPad all of this extra functionality with buttons and everything. Cool. Uh-huh.
00:59:57
It also lets you touch, taste, and smell your tech. You see that little grip on the side? Yeah. That's not just the
01:00:03
grip. It's also the smell vision. It's like one time use because you have to refill it after every time you use it. But it can do it. Okay. The iPad case,
01:00:15
hardware apps include compass, radio, screen recording, calculator, temperature, walkie-talkie, camera, AI assistant. Naturally, the specs, telephoto lens, physical viewfinder, 48
01:00:26
megapixel main sensor. The exposure control are all controlled by knobs. Love that. built-in kickstand and an
01:00:33
insane battery capacitive. This is a collab from Teenage Engineering and Mischief.
01:00:40
I noticed there's some asterisk. I Yeah, it was my followup question. There are some asterisks. Yes. What?
01:00:47
Okay. Okay. So, so I see the the the asterisk after AI assistant, correct? And insane battery capacity. What uh what do those asterisks mean, Adam? I'm
01:00:59
so glad you asked, Marquez. So, the AI assistant asterisk refers to the fact that you need to dial into an FM radio
01:01:07
station in order to use this AI assistant. It's a one-way technology. The AI will just constantly be spouting
01:01:14
advice over broadcast. Oh, so you can't query it. You cannot query it. It just gives you what it thinks you should do.
01:01:20
Okay. And then so the asterisk ask after insane battery capacity because yes I love the idea for the FM radio AI assistant because if we're not spending
01:01:32
tokens is that what you use in we're not you know we're not destroying the world
01:01:37
through too much over the bubble route. We're not destroying the you the world with the overuse of AI and and servers and graphics cards. We just kind of have one that's going on.
01:01:49
It's It's the most environmentally friendly AI. It is the one AI for all of humanity. It will just be broadcasting.
01:01:55
Kind of like Overlord vibes. I kind of like it kind of. And Adam, I'm sorry. I really don't want to just like tear this thing apart, but I I got to we got to
01:02:02
dive in. By all means. Okay. So, first of all, this dial pad, right? Yes. There's two zeros on it. There are.
01:02:08
Oh, what what feature does this unlock for the user? When you press the second zero, it's just the number 10.
01:02:15
What happens when you press the X? When you press the X, that's a custom function. It does all the numbers 0
01:02:20
through 10. All right. Interesting. Um, in between the compass and the side dial
01:02:26
pad, there appears to be what is either an incandescent light or a a second but smooth dial pad. It is a smooth dial pad. It's a smooth dial pad. That's how you change functions on the iPad itself.
01:02:41
Okay. Yeah. All right. All right. Okay. I think I'm starting to understand. Is there an FM radio? There is an FM radio.
01:02:47
That's how you tune in to the AI. Right. Right. Right. And that's what the antenna is for. All right. This is this
01:02:52
is starting to make sense. So it is just a case. It's a case. There is a power button on it though. There is a power
01:02:57
button. So does that the power for the for the case? Because iPads don't like you can't just like run all the battery.
01:03:03
It would just drain it. So it it needs its own power source. So this is totally up my alley. I love I love these sort of
01:03:09
expanded use products like this. But I will say my favorite thing where I think you've really outdone yourself is that
01:03:15
chrome kickstand. Yeah, buddy. Man, does that look sweet. And it folds all the way back on this thing. All Microsoft Surface. Like it just goes so you can Yeah, exactly. And switch. I like it. I
01:03:27
like it. Marquez, you don't look impressive. My favorite part is the mercury thermometer with no readouts on
01:03:34
the side to tell what temperature it is. It's real mercury, too. Awesome. Just in case you're wondering, just real. Is that a Now I got feel like I got to look that. I thought the I said mercury thermometer and then I was like
01:03:47
I thought that was the one with the marbles. No, that's mercury. I'm pretty sure that's a mercury one. The glass
01:03:52
ones with the liquid inside. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's a mercury thermometer. Yum. Mhm. So,
01:03:57
Adam, Adam, Adam, Adam, we're trying to put this on shelves, right? This is a consumer product. It
01:04:03
has Teen Engineering and Mischief, two of the hottest design firms around right now. What is your pitch to the consumer? Hype, baby. Hype. You could be the
01:04:14
person walking around holding this. Oh, that's that's what you This is not an an at home product. This is No, no. This is
01:04:20
a like big red boot kind of product. I I think whoever gave Marquez bubble wrap was a terrible idea.
01:04:32
I think the reason you shouldn't partner with Ellis is because he's asking questions like, "How do we market this?" It's with teenage engineering and
01:04:37
mischief. marketing is built in. The marketing is done already. There's almost no point in doing this. In fact, the only way to sell this is through a lottery system on a a temporary website
01:04:49
that self uh destructs in less than 24 hours. Um, and through that website, you actually just get mailed a physical raffle ticket. And if you are one of the numbers on that raffle ticket, then you
01:05:01
are able to buy a box of Boy Scout Girl Scout cookies that includes the actual device side of it. Not Not Girl Scout cookies. Boy Scout brand Girl Scout cookies. Correct. It's like a It's like
01:05:13
sort of a It's like a Jozo's sort of situation. Got it. Okay. Yeah, I like that. That's interesting. I I could see
01:05:19
that. I think that's how we sell it. Mhm. And then it's done. That's all we need. Yeah. No, this is a fully formed
01:05:26
product. There's only 50 of them. Yeah, naturally profit margins are Is there only a telephoto lens?
01:05:32
Only a telephoto lens, but there is a viewfinder so you can see it. So, it's it's for bird photography. Yeah.
01:05:38
Anything close enough to it will be paying too much attention to also in the cases. Why would you want to take a picture? What is wrong with our
01:05:44
co-workers that 50% of the products brought in were designed by Teenage Engineering and 50% of the products
01:05:50
brought in were specifically for bird photography? Nothing says hype like bird photography.
01:05:56
It's true. And orange. And orange. I I have a couple questions. So, obviously, there's a lot of physical controls and
01:06:03
things going on here. Do you have a price that you're aiming to hit when the ships? No, no, it's raffle only. So,
01:06:09
there's no revenue. No, the revenue is all of the millions of people that will be buying a raffle ticket. Oh, so how much does a raffle ticket cost? However much you want. You tell me. Investors,
01:06:20
how much does a raffle ticket? Interesting. I think we let them name their own price with a minimum of course
01:06:27
minimum $2 at least. Yeah. Uh okay, that's one question. The other question was going to be you you have all these
01:06:34
things attached to it, but I'm trying to see if there's anything patentable, protectable here that
01:06:41
couldn't be copied by your competitors because I could see, you know, an LG or a or a Otterbox coming out with something in this same category. And I'm
01:06:54
curious if you could defend this. No one's patenting that number pad because it is inherently wrong. That's that that
01:07:01
you probably should patent it just to make sure they don't copy it. But I'm curious your thoughts. We have spent the last several months buying up all of the
01:07:07
mercury that is commercially available. So no one else can get mercury. Big Monopoly energy. Okay. I like that. How
01:07:14
much does it weigh? It weighs roughly 3 lb. Okay. Yeah. So it is carryable depending on the size because with or without you can put an iPad in it. iPad Pro, iPad Pro 13in, iPad Mini. Depends
01:07:25
on which one you want. It's universal. I thought about it for all of it. There you go. I do love that kickstand. I
01:07:31
don't know why the kickstand is sick and it folds all the way up and you can wear it like a clutch. That kickstand is actually very similar to the kickstand
01:07:38
on your OnePlus keyron keyboard. It is. Yeah, it's like almost exactly the same. All right, Adam, hear me out. I'm on
01:07:44
board and if you go with me, here's how we're going to do this. We're going to do the raffle idea. I think that's a really excellent way to distribute the
01:07:50
product. I brought that up. What the problem with people pay for raffle tickets is that if they don't win, they
01:07:56
effectively get nothing. I never said they get nothing. They get a sticker. Aiden, let me finish. Okay.
01:08:03
Which is why I think the purchase of a raffle ticket should be through a cryptocoin, a memecoin,
01:08:11
because that way we are still able to deliver consumers absolutely nothing, but they at least think they have
01:08:17
something. What what do I get out of it? Uh, can I pull something at the end of this rug? So, I can get Well, that's the beauty of this whole thing is you won't
01:08:32
even need to do a rug pull because you're already providing nothing whatsoever. People driving are just like flinching every day. Sorry, I should not have given Marquez
01:08:43
bubble red. That's my bad. Uh, yeah. No, I'm I'm in. I would like to be your investor. I think as you know, someone
01:08:49
who works in audio, I'm really I could I'd be great at communicating Teenage Engineering products. As someone who
01:08:55
likes bad stuff, um I'd be really excellent at communicating this. That's true. Uh I'm literally using a phone
01:09:01
with as many buttons on it right now. Um and um loving every second of it. And loving every second of it. And um and yeah, I just think I would be the perfect person to guide you towards
01:09:16
capturing all of the market share for a a a camping case, I think, is what this sort of is. The hype a hype camping case. The hypest hypest. Are there any plans for supporting Android tablets?
01:09:30
Somewhere down the line. Oh, yeah. For that, I'm out. I'm I'm thinking I like this. There's a couple things that I really like that I think I could bring value to. One is I
01:09:42
think I could sell a ton of raffle tickets for you and I think we can get this in front of a lot of eyeballs. Two,
01:09:48
I just like the aesthetic of the product, the presentation, the dynamic island in the middle. Everything is just
01:09:55
working for me. Uh I meant the dynamic island in the presentation, not in the product. I think that's great. Um, and
01:10:02
then I think, yeah, there's there's a little bit of room for extra little design touches. And I think I was
01:10:08
actually picturing a hype video that I would be able to make for you that's just ASMR. It's just sounds. It's me
01:10:13
pressing the buttons with a microphone super up close in 8K and just hearing the way every button and everything
01:10:19
sounds when you use it. And I think that would be incredible. So, I think I could do that for you and we'd be able to blow this thing up. So, where's where's taste
01:10:26
come in? What am I what am I tasting as part of this? Whatever you want. Mercury right there on the side. Mercury,
01:10:34
you know. All right. Anything as Sorry, I forgot to tell you. If you want to screen record too, there's a big orange
01:10:41
button. You just press that and it starts screen recording. The eject button is because this is also a
01:10:47
CD player. Where? On the side. On what side? There's no somewhere in here. That's the asterisk.
01:10:58
Does it come with an ashtray? How does it charge? USBA or USBC? Micro USB. Micro. Micro B. Yeah, micro B.
01:11:10
I got I mean, Adam, it's the kind of thing where it's like I have infinite notes
01:11:16
and at the same time I I have no notes. And I just really hope, you know, we we've produced this podcast together for
01:11:22
many years now. And I hope that you can tr, you know, parlay that trust into letting me guide this product to success. Even though I don't see the tape player, and I don't really want to
01:11:33
lick it. Um, I still think that'll change. I I could fit that in the ASMR video. So So you've got two offers on
01:11:39
the table. Andrew is out for the lack of Android support out of the gate, but you have an offer from Ellis and an offer
01:11:45
from myself. No, no, no. Andrew is out because of the Android. I see. I see. Because of the problem. If something is compatible with Android, it is inherently not. It's one of those things where you have such a good product and
01:11:56
the minute you try and expand into all those things, it's just going to be a money pit and we're going to go out of business and I don't want to watch my
01:12:03
money go down the drain like that. Pop incoming. Bingo. Oh my god. Sorry, Ellis. Who has to edit this later? I'm just going to replace every single bubble wrap pop with a the
01:12:15
sound of a cat meowing. I just like that you gave me bubble wrap and I want to work with you more.
01:12:22
All right. You know, you guys have made this decision quite tough. Yeah. Um but I think I have to go with Ellis. Wow. Ellis, you
01:12:33
know, I made this intentionally with the buttons and knobs with you in mind, and I know that we can take this to the next
01:12:38
level. I think you and you know I think you and I can take anything to the next level out but this except this episode
01:12:45
[Music] [Laughter] if I see an ASMR video on this I'll be sending a fake uh copyright strike. You
01:12:58
know, unfortunately I also have all of these scores in front of me. So Ellis, now that you have two votes for you,
01:13:04
Andrew also has two votes. It would appear that the shark who got the most people to partner with them is Marquez
01:13:12
with three partnerships. Nice. It's almost like it's his show or something. I could have had it all. I offered to lick the mercury. It didn't even work, but I would have gotten something there. Amazing. Wow, that's
01:13:26
that was fun. I'm glad we did that. I think there is a world where this concept gets expanded in a future bonus episode. I don't know exactly know what that looks like. I could see this as a
01:13:37
like maybe Ted this. Okay, so none of us on the show knew any of these things. It
01:13:42
obviously was very meme focused, which I think we had a really fun time doing. I could see a version of this show where
01:13:48
like do people think of like real things we always hear are like, wouldn't that be so cool if this had that? And maybe
01:13:55
there is a version of this where we like pitch it a little more. You should look at our emails. It's literally like we
01:14:00
like we get this in email form. That would be a banger episode of just taking some of the worst emails, don't name
01:14:06
anyone, and like going through some of these. I got an email. Don't name it. I'm not going to name it,
01:14:12
but if it if it feels too specific, you know, maybe cut this. I got an email for a power outlet that has a credit card
01:14:20
swiper in it so that if you're like at a coffee shop, you can like charge people to to charge their laptop or whatever.
01:14:28
Oh. Oh, wait. That's a good idea. No, it's not a good idea. That is a stupid idea. That is a stupid
01:14:34
thing. I own a coffee shop. That's what I'm doing. Yeah, this is why it's commercial. When you hand the bartender your phone, you're like, "Can you charge this?" You and be like, "Hand me your credit card and we'll make this happen."
01:14:45
And you make so much extra revenue. People would do it. You would make some external You make some revenue on top. People would 100% do that. Yeah, that's
01:14:51
a good idea. I'm going to email them. That's not That is that is not a good idea. That is not a good idea. This is
01:14:56
why I said yes to everything for a month for that video. I think we should we'll probably have to do that again sometime. Yeah. Anyway, well, if you listen to the
01:15:04
end of this episode, send Marquez an email soon because he'll be saying yes, apparently, but uh if you also made it
01:15:10
this far, thank you. That was purely experimental and super fun. I don't know how much fun it was to listen to, but uh let us know which product you liked the best, please. And huge shout out to
01:15:21
David Federiel again. He made all these concepts a long time ago, but I'm glad we finally got them out into the real
01:15:28
world. And we'll be back with a normal episode where I'm not at this table on Friday. We'll miss you.
01:15:37
Thanks for watching. See you guys later. Peace. Peace. Wave is produced by Adamolina and Ellis. We're partner with Vox Media Podcast Network and our music is
01:15:48
Vainil. Bingo. [Music]