Search Captions & Ask AI

Confessions of a Homeschool Bad Girl | EXHS #5

August 21, 2024 / 51:05

This episode features Jacob and Laura discussing their experiences growing up in a homeschool environment. They cover topics such as homeschooling dynamics, social interactions, and extracurricular activities, including acting in TV shows.

Laura shares her journey of being homeschooled her entire life alongside her twin sister, while her other siblings had different educational paths. She reflects on both positive and negative aspects of homeschooling, including feelings of isolation and missing traditional school experiences.

They discuss their involvement in background work for TV shows like New Girl and Parenthood, and how this shaped their perspectives on acting and the entertainment industry. Laura expresses the challenges she faced in the competitive acting world and how her experiences influenced her views on education.

The conversation also touches on the importance of open communication between parents and children, especially regarding sensitive topics. Laura emphasizes the need for parents to engage in discussions about relationships and sexuality.

Finally, they reflect on their shared experiences at homeschool dances, the pressures of dress codes, and the evolving landscape of homeschooling today.

TL;DR

Jacob and Laura discuss their homeschool experiences, acting careers, and the importance of open communication in parenting.

Episode

51:05
00:00:03
well welcome back to the ex-
00:00:05
homeschoolers Club I am of course your
00:00:07
host Jacob good and today I'm joined by
00:00:09
my friend Laura I'm so excited to have
00:00:12
Laura um we have known each other for a
00:00:15
good long time I know as far back as I
00:00:17
can remember in my homes School Journey
00:00:19
she's pretty much been around and a part
00:00:21
of it um from what we were talking about
00:00:25
before we uh before we hit record I
00:00:27
think we met during group Solutions um
00:00:30
um does that sound about right yeah okay
00:00:32
sounds about right so and for those of
00:00:34
you who don't know group Solutions was
00:00:35
basically an opportunity for uh our
00:00:38
homeschool Community to come together
00:00:39
and parents taught classes and kind of
00:00:41
put kids in more of like a classroom
00:00:43
setting so we actually got to learn how
00:00:45
to interact and be semi-normal um around
00:00:48
each other so anyway Laura I'm stoked to
00:00:51
have you thank you for coming on the
00:00:52
show yeah thank you for having me well
00:00:55
let's kick things off with your
00:00:58
homeschool Journey like what were you
00:01:00
always homeschooled I know you're one of
00:01:02
four siblings and um I I know at some
00:01:06
point all four of you have been
00:01:07
homeschooled but like were you
00:01:09
homeschooled all the way through um was
00:01:11
it a later in life did you go all the
00:01:14
way through high school what what was
00:01:15
the deal there yeah uh I was
00:01:17
homeschooled my whole life um I think my
00:01:20
twin sister and I are the only ones out
00:01:21
of the four uh siblings that were
00:01:24
homeschooled throughout my older sister
00:01:27
was in public school and then my younger
00:01:29
sister went to independent studies in
00:01:32
high school so my twin sister and I were
00:01:34
the only ones that were fully
00:01:35
homeschooled throughout and um I mean I
00:01:38
had a really good decent experience but
00:01:41
there were some ups and downs for sure
00:01:44
absolutely I think we all have those
00:01:45
like cringey moments of that we're
00:01:47
looking back on and we're like H that
00:01:49
wasn't that wasn't great that could have
00:01:50
been yeah a lot better totally well
00:01:52
that's really cool so overall a
00:01:55
semi-positive experience which is cool
00:01:57
but um are there any moments that stick
00:01:59
out in your head as like as just like a
00:02:02
favorite home I mean obviously you did
00:02:03
it your whole life like um I talked
00:02:05
about in my solo episode of just like I
00:02:09
I had already gone to public school for
00:02:10
a couple years and so it was really hard
00:02:12
to transition into home school and all
00:02:13
of a sudden be at home with my mom all
00:02:15
the time but like that was just
00:02:17
obviously normal for you because that
00:02:19
was all you ever do um but are there any
00:02:22
particular moments that stick out in
00:02:24
like early homeschool years of just like
00:02:28
I don't know it could be weirdness could
00:02:30
be just like an awesome moment is there
00:02:31
anything like that that sticks out for
00:02:32
you for like a cool moment of
00:02:34
homeschooling was like we so in high
00:02:36
school we did background work so we
00:02:39
worked I think three or four years maybe
00:02:42
our whole High School career in La so we
00:02:45
did schooling and like the the sets the
00:02:49
background sets and that was really cool
00:02:52
um and like growing up you know there
00:02:54
was the flexibility of like if we wanted
00:02:56
to have a random day off we could go
00:02:58
have a day off and go to the park or go
00:02:59
to the beach um or family came into town
00:03:02
you know it was kind of a free day uh we
00:03:05
would make up for it later but you know
00:03:07
we could easily take that day off um so
00:03:10
that was something I really enjoyed was
00:03:12
the flexibility of it and to just be
00:03:14
with my sisters all the time you know we
00:03:17
we fought like crazy but we like were
00:03:20
together all the time and those were
00:03:21
like my best friends so um and a
00:03:25
negative probably aspect for me was just
00:03:28
you know being so isolated
00:03:30
and missing out on like the sports um
00:03:33
the proms homecoming and you know the
00:03:37
friends aspect even though I had friends
00:03:39
in homeschooling there was that part of
00:03:41
me that felt like you know I didn't have
00:03:43
public school friends like that's what I
00:03:45
had to have was public school friends I
00:03:47
don't even know why not that they were
00:03:49
you know any better like friends or
00:03:51
friends but um there was just that part
00:03:54
of me that was like I wanted to fill
00:03:57
that void um and just to you know have a
00:04:00
locker decorate my locker and teachers
00:04:04
so um that was always something I wanted
00:04:07
now looking back I'm like I was so silly
00:04:11
because I was fine and I don't want that
00:04:14
now so that's hilarious you brought up
00:04:16
something I totally spaced on the fact
00:04:18
that you um you guys were like in TV
00:04:22
shows and stuff and uh yeah I I
00:04:25
shouldn't have spaced on that because I
00:04:27
literally was just watching uh new new
00:04:29
girl and you guys were in an episode of
00:04:32
new girl um yeah and I recently just
00:04:36
watched that episode so um I don't know
00:04:39
how I spaced on that but what like how
00:04:41
many TV shows were you guys in do you
00:04:43
remember oh gosh I so it was Andrea Jose
00:04:48
and I that did background work so
00:04:50
between all three of us God there was so
00:04:52
many TV shows and commercials movies um
00:04:56
I think oh gosh I don't even know how
00:04:58
many shows I was on I was on a lot I
00:05:00
think the ones that you could probably
00:05:03
see me is probably like three or four
00:05:05
shows um I was on the show Parenthood
00:05:08
for six months or five or six months um
00:05:11
so that was really fun new girl I was on
00:05:14
I think it was two days uh and that was
00:05:17
the one show new girl that I was like I
00:05:19
don't want people to remember
00:05:21
me and that's the only show people see
00:05:24
me on because I was so sick that day
00:05:28
like I had a fever like the flu I had to
00:05:30
cough like I look so miserable in that
00:05:33
episode I'm the one wearing the green
00:05:35
shirt and I remember thinking like I
00:05:38
never want people to remember me from
00:05:40
this episode and now that's the only
00:05:43
episode people will message me about so
00:05:45
it's so funny um but yeah so I was on
00:05:48
New Girl and then Parenthood was my
00:05:49
favorite show because that was just very
00:05:51
family based um and like everyone was
00:05:55
just so sweet anded down to earth and I
00:05:57
pretty much did like senior year on that
00:06:00
Universal Studios lot so was that kind
00:06:03
of like the goal of like like how did
00:06:06
you guys fall into that like was it was
00:06:08
it something where you guys had just
00:06:10
wanted to act and so you were like okay
00:06:12
let's look for opportunities and then
00:06:14
like was there was the the goal to like
00:06:16
make it a career or like what what was
00:06:19
kind of the the thing there because
00:06:20
that's like such a cool thing to like be
00:06:22
able to do especially like to say like
00:06:23
oh yeah and you know I as a homeschool
00:06:26
kid yeah I also got to go like work on
00:06:28
TV shows and commercials and stuff
00:06:29
that's super fun well since we were
00:06:32
Andrea and I were little we wanted to be
00:06:34
like an actress um I was like I want to
00:06:36
be like Hillary Duff you know and of
00:06:38
course be the next Lizzie MaGuire and so
00:06:41
that was like our dream was to be famous
00:06:44
and so um and my older sister had
00:06:48
experience doing that when she was
00:06:50
younger and so my mom kept telling us
00:06:52
like I don't think you want to do that
00:06:53
and all this stuff and and so we were
00:06:56
like you know begging her to do this and
00:06:58
so finally she let us and she was going
00:07:00
to let us make that decision ourself um
00:07:03
like once we were in high school and she
00:07:06
like kind of took us in there our uncle
00:07:08
was an actor um so he knew what industry
00:07:11
what managements to get into that were
00:07:13
safe um and so that's what we did was we
00:07:16
got into the management and they just
00:07:18
started sending us calls and they call
00:07:20
you and say like I need a 16-year-old
00:07:22
Hispanic girl with black hair to be on
00:07:26
you know this show and stuff and then
00:07:28
you accept the the call and then they
00:07:31
send you and so um so that's kind of how
00:07:35
we got started now once we started it I
00:07:38
was like I hate it I do not like this um
00:07:43
it was so fun and I'm thankful for the
00:07:45
experience and the shows I was on but it
00:07:48
was
00:07:50
so tough because there is this very high
00:07:54
standard that you need to be perfect you
00:07:56
need to be skinny you need to be tall
00:07:59
you need need to be outgoing like all
00:08:00
these standards that you need to meet
00:08:03
and if you don't meet those standards
00:08:05
they will tell you the directors will
00:08:07
tell you no matter how old you are um
00:08:10
and so that was really hard to hear that
00:08:13
and even if you met all those standards
00:08:16
um you can't like outshine the main
00:08:19
actress and that happened to me once on
00:08:21
a TV show was I looked basically too
00:08:23
good and so they needed to move me to
00:08:25
the back because I look too good and so
00:08:28
that was like a little shocking because
00:08:30
it was like okay I'm doing everything
00:08:32
you would like me to do and now I look
00:08:34
too perfect so um so that was a little
00:08:37
tough and you know there's just the
00:08:39
competition with all the other kids that
00:08:42
want their shot that want to be an actor
00:08:45
comedian models whatever so there's a
00:08:48
lot of competition and then you're
00:08:50
dealing with Stage moms and Stage moms
00:08:53
are a whole another level and so that
00:08:56
was that was really hard was the comp
00:08:59
ition and at that point I wasn't doing
00:09:03
background to become an actress or a
00:09:05
Hollywood star it was it just became
00:09:07
like I just needed to make money because
00:09:09
I wanted to provide for my family um and
00:09:12
so by that point I was like I don't care
00:09:14
like if the uh directors assistant
00:09:17
directors would come in looking for kids
00:09:19
they just moms throw themselves at them
00:09:21
they throw their kids at them and I was
00:09:23
just like you know I'm over it if I get
00:09:26
picked I get picked and a lot of the
00:09:27
times I would get picked because I
00:09:29
wasn't throwing myself at these
00:09:30
directors um but yeah so it was really
00:09:34
tough and then once I turned 18 you're
00:09:37
no longer um covered by like law that
00:09:41
like you know all those under 18 law
00:09:43
requirements so you're like free game so
00:09:46
by that point I was like I'm over it I
00:09:48
don't really want to do this anymore um
00:09:51
my parents were going through a divorce
00:09:52
and so I was like I just want to be home
00:09:54
I don't want to keep going out to LA
00:09:57
gone for 10 hours a day not knowing
00:09:58
what's happen at home so that's when I
00:10:01
was like okay I'm I'm done with this but
00:10:03
I am thankful for the the opportunity
00:10:05
that I had especially being so close to
00:10:07
La so that's super cool I yeah I don't
00:10:11
know that we've ever chatted about that
00:10:13
before but I always like I've always
00:10:15
kind of wondered because I was like I
00:10:17
mean I think every kid has that dream of
00:10:19
like oh I want to be famous someday but
00:10:21
like not everyone actually like take
00:10:23
steps to like pursue that and so it was
00:10:26
definitely cool to like you know know
00:10:29
people that were like oh well he's been
00:10:31
on TV shows and they've been in
00:10:32
commercials and things like that even
00:10:34
though maybe it wasn't as glamorous
00:10:36
behind the scenes um yeah but that is
00:10:38
really cool and also like so many skills
00:10:40
that you learn off of that right the
00:10:41
ability to like go out and if you do
00:10:43
have lines or just like be confident
00:10:45
enough on camera I mean I'm super camera
00:10:48
shy um it's so uh yeah so it's weird
00:10:52
that I'm doing a podcast now because uh
00:10:54
I I hate being on camera I've been so
00:10:56
much behind the scenes for so long and
00:10:58
and now I'm like okay got to put it on
00:11:00
on me you're doing great though well
00:11:02
thank you um also you know being a
00:11:04
homeschool kid you know a lot of us fear
00:11:07
like public speaking I mean I think a
00:11:09
lot of people fear like public speaking
00:11:10
or like just that having to present
00:11:12
yourself to the world right and so
00:11:14
that's what a great way to kind of like
00:11:17
get out of that like just push through
00:11:19
that is like be on TV right um and
00:11:23
especially like you got to go through
00:11:24
like you said like auditions and
00:11:26
fighting against like other kids who are
00:11:28
up for the same role and like but I
00:11:31
think what you said there about just
00:11:32
like not really caring just being like
00:11:35
you know I'm going to let my performance
00:11:36
speak for itself and people respected
00:11:39
that and picked you for it the best
00:11:40
advice I ever got when I got to college
00:11:42
was I had a professor who sat me down
00:11:45
and just said you got to learn to be
00:11:46
cool like you just got to fit in with
00:11:49
the crowd um kind of a thing yes and
00:11:51
obviously you present your unique self
00:11:54
but like you're not pushing to you're
00:11:56
not overdoing it right you're just there
00:11:59
cool and you can hang with anybody and
00:12:01
you can be cool and you can just be in
00:12:02
the room and so um yeah you and your
00:12:05
sister have always been super cool in my
00:12:07
book um too cool for school so oh my
00:12:10
gosh oh thank you so aside from that is
00:12:14
obviously a huge extracurricular which
00:12:16
you know a big myth that is that a lot
00:12:18
of homeschoolers don't have
00:12:19
extracurriculars that is a huge
00:12:21
extracurricular but you also talked
00:12:22
about the fact that you felt like you
00:12:24
were missing out so much in school
00:12:26
because you didn't have a locker you you
00:12:28
weren't in sports you know um kind of
00:12:31
the standard you know junior high high
00:12:33
school stuff that a lot of a lot of guys
00:12:35
and girls go through and so yeah was
00:12:39
there any other like extracurricular
00:12:41
stuff you guys were doing aside from
00:12:43
aside from acting in school or like or
00:12:45
was it mostly just that um so that's
00:12:49
mainly our focus in high school but we
00:12:51
still were doing like um the homes
00:12:53
school dances uh dance lessons so like
00:12:56
swing um I I remember you talking about
00:12:58
like the Co swing I remember that one
00:13:00
Lindy Hop the waltz um the English
00:13:04
country dancing so we did all those um
00:13:09
but I have to say this like sorry to my
00:13:11
mother because we did not go easily we
00:13:14
went kicking and screaming at least I
00:13:16
know I did um because I did not want to
00:13:19
learn those dances um because I I felt
00:13:22
like I was too cool for school um now
00:13:25
I'm super thankful I know those dances
00:13:27
but yeah so we did all those lessons and
00:13:29
then I would do like AYSO soccer um
00:13:32
every year it was like every fall so
00:13:35
that's something that we would do and
00:13:36
then we also were at the community
00:13:37
college Ventura College um taking Sports
00:13:41
classes so you do like soccer um
00:13:43
swimming tennis or whatever so even like
00:13:46
a gym class so that's kind of like what
00:13:49
we would do um and I think that's pretty
00:13:53
much it like we would do like knitting
00:13:54
classes there's a lot of that HX stuff I
00:13:57
feel like cuz yeah my sister something
00:13:59
like that and home economics we had to
00:14:01
learn how to be like a good housewife
00:14:03
you know and cook and sew and all these
00:14:06
things so there was all that stuff um
00:14:09
and I did not go to these things easily
00:14:11
it was usually a fight with my mom so um
00:14:14
some of those classes were fun and I'm
00:14:16
thankful I did those but then there's
00:14:17
some that I'm like I could have lived
00:14:19
without you know so it's so funny
00:14:22
because I love cooking and I haven't
00:14:25
always loved cooking but I just I love
00:14:27
cooking now and um just and and I work
00:14:31
from home and so like okay yeah and so
00:14:34
like having a a meal on the table when
00:14:37
my wife gets home from work is like I
00:14:40
love it so like our it's funny cuz I
00:14:41
tell people I'm like our roles are kind
00:14:42
of perversed like I was used to you know
00:14:45
my dad would come home from work and my
00:14:47
mom would have dinner on the table and
00:14:48
now I'm that so our joke is always that
00:14:51
like I'm just such a good housewife um
00:14:54
and uh you know I'm one of the Real
00:14:56
Housewives of of Nashville um but it's
00:14:59
just I I really do enjoy like that stuff
00:15:03
I've always enjoyed things like sewing
00:15:05
and like more of the home X stuff um and
00:15:09
so it's just funny um to look at it and
00:15:13
and like you said go Kicking and
00:15:14
Screaming into it but you also brought
00:15:15
up one of my favorite pastimes which was
00:15:17
swing dance of course and yeah that was
00:15:20
always a blast like you said our
00:15:23
Homeschool Group had like dances every
00:15:25
year and they would try to kind of like
00:15:28
give us somewhat of normal High School
00:15:30
junior high experience by having dances
00:15:32
but it was not the typical like DJ
00:15:35
bumping grind kind of a thing it was
00:15:36
like we we would do swing dance Ballroom
00:15:40
uh Waltz Tango Tango was risque though
00:15:43
but um oh yeah but naughty chaa yeah
00:15:46
Tango was naughty um yeah but those
00:15:49
skills have come in so clutch so many
00:15:50
times for me on just like just the most
00:15:54
random events that I've been at where
00:15:56
it's just like oh we everyone's doing
00:15:58
the Charleston all of a sudden it's like
00:15:59
oh I know how to do that you know um but
00:16:03
that's so funny um earlier I think you
00:16:06
brought up you brought up prom and I was
00:16:09
remembering as we were talking that we
00:16:11
actually went to the same prom not
00:16:14
together um but it was on a padle yeah
00:16:17
not not together um I am having Julia on
00:16:20
though and we are gonna hopefully talk
00:16:23
about that's going to be so fun oh my
00:16:25
gosh yeah I'm very excited so I went to
00:16:28
two prom I went to prom with car France
00:16:30
and then the following year that was my
00:16:31
junior prom and then my senior prom I
00:16:33
went with our friend Julia and um you
00:16:37
were there as well it was on a paddle
00:16:38
booat from what I remember yes and uh it
00:16:41
was in combination with I think was it
00:16:45
it was like a Christian High School I
00:16:46
think um and so it was a mix of
00:16:48
homeschool kids and private school kids
00:16:50
a lot of who we who we knew um yeah from
00:16:54
from they they had been homeschool kids
00:16:57
I think a lot of them uh before they
00:16:59
went to private school yeah so good
00:17:03
times but that was I remember those
00:17:05
experiences being a little bit different
00:17:06
because since it wasn't a homeschool
00:17:08
event the the DJ was just playing like
00:17:11
dance music and I felt like The
00:17:13
Homeschool kids like didn't know what to
00:17:15
do with it right yeah and my inner
00:17:17
Mexican came out because uh well I don't
00:17:20
look it I am a quarter Hispanic and so
00:17:23
but I was all I had was my my great
00:17:25
grandma Alice in my head going you just
00:17:27
got to go out there and shake it um
00:17:30
because that was her birthday parties
00:17:31
was always just like this big festival
00:17:33
and they would have a DJ and we just go
00:17:35
party on a dance floor kind of a thing
00:17:36
and so um and she's and I would always
00:17:38
be as a kid I was like but I don't know
00:17:40
how to and she's like it doesn't matter
00:17:42
you just make it up as you go along and
00:17:43
so I feel like you did the worm at that
00:17:46
I don't think so I I was never a worm
00:17:48
guy maybe you were moving a lot now that
00:17:51
you're talking about it I remember you
00:17:53
dancing a lot like on the boat right is
00:17:56
that what you're talking about yeah that
00:17:59
was yeah I remember it was you and then
00:18:02
there had to been someone else I think
00:18:04
it was someone else that went to the
00:18:05
Christian School that was dancing like
00:18:08
so crazy and it was like wow like we
00:18:10
were dancing to like dynamite and okay I
00:18:13
have to share I remember I do remember
00:18:16
the proms but those were not the proms I
00:18:19
want um I do remember the first prom we
00:18:22
went to was that Aliva Adobe I believe
00:18:25
um because we were both part of a cheve
00:18:28
just so everyone's aware um and I
00:18:30
remember we someone requested the rift
00:18:34
shop by mamore to be played and and I
00:18:37
can't remember I'm pretty sure you were
00:18:38
there I don't remember if you remember
00:18:40
this moment but um that song came on and
00:18:44
a mom got very very upset and demanded
00:18:47
it be shut off and then we had to start
00:18:50
praying do you remember that I do
00:18:52
remember that you know it's so funny how
00:18:54
music is such a like it it can be such a
00:18:58
turnoff and goes into like the
00:19:00
protective nature of like homeschool
00:19:02
parents and like religious parents in
00:19:04
general of like my parents let me get
00:19:07
away with a lot obviously they protected
00:19:09
me from some some music Thrift Shop was
00:19:11
one that it snuck in but the queen
00:19:13
version snuck in um kind of a thing but
00:19:17
I had an instance where after I had
00:19:19
graduated I I left I went to college I
00:19:22
got a phone call was at college that I
00:19:25
was coming home for Christmas and they
00:19:28
said hey we need a DJ for this
00:19:30
homeschool Christian dance and I was
00:19:32
like or homeschool Christmas dance
00:19:34
excuse me um and I was like oh yeah sure
00:19:36
I still have all the playlists I have
00:19:38
all that stuff so yeah I got it swing
00:19:40
dance you got it I got you covered I'm
00:19:43
there I'm DJing I put on a queen song
00:19:46
and a mom instantly runs over to me and
00:19:49
I'm like oh no and she is all these
00:19:51
songs by the way have been approved by
00:19:53
achieve they've gone through the circuit
00:19:55
she comes running over to me and she
00:19:56
goes do you know that that song is sing
00:19:59
by a gay man and I was like yes it's
00:20:02
Queen like every everyone knows who
00:20:03
Queen is I and she's like you need to
00:20:07
turn that off right now and I said well
00:20:08
it's approved music by a so like if you
00:20:11
don't like it you can take it up with
00:20:13
them but like I'm not about to just cut
00:20:15
this song off Midway um kind of a deal
00:20:17
and her and I had this like little back
00:20:18
and forth and she was and it was just so
00:20:20
funny and I don't know I don't know why
00:20:24
I get it for some songs obviously there
00:20:26
there's there's very runchy songs out
00:20:28
there that yeah maybe we shouldn't have
00:20:30
been listening to but um at the same
00:20:32
time it was just like we're enjoying
00:20:34
we're dancing to Queen it's not that big
00:20:36
of a deal you know um yes exactly yeah
00:20:39
that
00:20:40
was that was a fun time because I
00:20:43
remember that song was very popular and
00:20:45
it was like come on like we I was about
00:20:47
to drop it like I was really excited
00:20:49
finally a good song was playing and then
00:20:52
we had to pray so yep that was a
00:20:55
highlight of prom for me and then of
00:20:57
course the boat was fun and
00:20:59
chaotic as well being dress coded up and
00:21:03
up and down so let's talk about that a
00:21:05
little bit because it's something that
00:21:08
well I personally got dress coded maybe
00:21:11
once or twice but it was but for guys it
00:21:13
was a lot easier so in our homes School
00:21:15
Community for dances for I mean it was
00:21:17
basically for everything there was dress
00:21:19
code for guys it's pretty simple just
00:21:21
wear slacks and a dress shirt I mean
00:21:24
unless you show up wearing a dress shirt
00:21:25
that has like Playboy bunnies on it I
00:21:28
really don't think they're going to turn
00:21:29
you away kind of a thing you know like
00:21:31
it was one of those things where it's
00:21:32
like yeah unless what you are wearing
00:21:34
has something risque on it or if you
00:21:36
show up and ripped jeans like they're
00:21:38
really not and even if you showed up in
00:21:39
jeans half the time you could get you
00:21:41
could you could smooth talk your way in
00:21:43
yeah the girls had it so much harder
00:21:45
because I mean one you guys had to cover
00:21:47
cleavage straps had to be a certain
00:21:50
thickness like lengthwise it had to be
00:21:53
you know so what like tell me about that
00:21:55
and like what that I don't know like
00:21:57
that just seems crazy to me oh my gosh
00:22:01
that was I was telling my mom this like
00:22:03
that was probably the
00:22:05
most tough situations to be in as a
00:22:10
junior higher even Elementary I don't
00:22:12
know what how old we had to be to go to
00:22:13
these dances but however young it was
00:22:16
all the way through high school was just
00:22:18
very um hard to hear things you know
00:22:22
that they say you know have lasagna
00:22:24
straps not spaghetti straps don't show
00:22:26
your cleavage the ne the your skirt
00:22:28
needs to be touching the top of your
00:22:31
knee and don't make the boy stumble like
00:22:34
just to hear things like that where it's
00:22:36
like you're always the problem and you
00:22:40
have to make sure that you hold a higher
00:22:42
standard as a woman especially for the
00:22:44
boys that are going through so much um
00:22:47
it was really hard because um there
00:22:51
there were ways you could smooth talk to
00:22:53
get in but you could smooth talk one mom
00:22:56
and three moms are upset so um so that
00:22:59
was really hard because when you did get
00:23:01
in you're getting looked down upon of
00:23:03
like oh she's she's showing and and I
00:23:08
hated when the rulers would come out
00:23:11
when they would pull the rulers out to
00:23:13
measure your skirt make sure see how
00:23:15
close it is is it half an inch quarter
00:23:17
of an inch touching your knee I hated
00:23:19
that because at that point everyone
00:23:21
could see you you're at the front door
00:23:23
right next to the front door is the
00:23:24
whole ballroom dance room and your
00:23:27
friends are watching oh she going to
00:23:28
come in you pay your money you go in um
00:23:30
and then to be turned away and say no
00:23:32
you have to go home and change and for
00:23:34
families like us like a grw up in oxnar
00:23:37
having to go to these dances in Ventura
00:23:39
or even ohigh it was hard and like I
00:23:43
love the dances because I got to be with
00:23:44
my friends um so like my mom would take
00:23:48
us home and we would change and she
00:23:49
would take us back so it was things like
00:23:51
that that was really just annoying we
00:23:54
and know it's not like these these moms
00:23:56
didn't know us these were our friends
00:23:58
moms these were moms in achieve that
00:24:00
knew us and it was just like let us in
00:24:04
sometimes I mean at some point we just
00:24:05
started bringing extra clothes with us
00:24:07
because we didn't want to have to make
00:24:09
the trip back um so we just go change
00:24:12
and and you know you work so hard as a
00:24:14
junior higher in a high school you want
00:24:15
to look cute you're going through
00:24:17
puberty you know you want you're
00:24:19
starting to notice like oh I can wear
00:24:20
makeup I can do my hair and then to be
00:24:23
told like oh you're showing too much go
00:24:25
home at some point it's like you might
00:24:27
as well just wear a t-shirt shirt and
00:24:29
skirt down to your ankles because you're
00:24:33
going to get talked about sometimes
00:24:34
emails would be sent um and that was
00:24:38
that was really hard because I think we
00:24:40
started to gain a reputation as we just
00:24:43
don't follow the rules because there's
00:24:45
you know two of us with my twin and I
00:24:48
then my older sister who was in high
00:24:49
school still at some point I think we
00:24:51
did some dances together um so it was it
00:24:54
was really hard and annoying and I think
00:24:57
what likes me the most is don't make the
00:24:59
boys stumble because it was like that is
00:25:01
not our job yeah to keep the boys from
00:25:05
stumbling it's really interesting you
00:25:06
bring that up because I just did an
00:25:09
interview for a show um and I talked
00:25:12
about purity culture and I talked about
00:25:13
growing up in Purity culture um and yeah
00:25:16
that was a big that was a big emphasis
00:25:17
of like it's the girl's job to make sure
00:25:19
you don't stumble and I always first of
00:25:22
all that's um just play as
00:25:25
simple it's um as guys it's
00:25:28
already responsibility to you know keep
00:25:30
your thoughts to yourself and to you
00:25:32
know and like to control yourself
00:25:35
honestly and you know if a girl wearing
00:25:38
spaghetti straps over lasagna thick
00:25:40
straps um is going to be that thing that
00:25:42
does it for you uh check yourself um
00:25:46
because that's not okay um and so I feel
00:25:50
so bad for all all of you girls because
00:25:52
I mean I think there was an unreasonable
00:25:55
expectation that wasn't even necessarily
00:25:57
coming
00:25:59
from your peers it was coming from
00:26:01
parents right wanting to protect their
00:26:03
kids but well so I think that's where
00:26:06
it's hard because it it doesn't 100%
00:26:08
come from a bad place but it comes from
00:26:12
a place of parents not wanting to have
00:26:14
actual conversations with their kids
00:26:17
about like when you're going through
00:26:19
puberty I mean just like the emotions
00:26:22
and the the hormones are raging right
00:26:25
and like if you have a parent who's
00:26:27
actually just willing to sit down with
00:26:28
you and talk about what's going on in
00:26:29
your body and like how do you respond to
00:26:31
that and like especially as a guy like
00:26:33
also like what does it mean to like have
00:26:35
female friends and like what does it
00:26:37
mean to be in a romantic relationship
00:26:38
and all these things it's like well all
00:26:40
of it's really not that hard to control
00:26:43
yourself and um and not not look
00:26:47
lustfully at a girl um because it's not
00:26:50
her job
00:26:51
to um it's yeah it's not her job to keep
00:26:54
you pure it's your own job you know and
00:26:57
so I sorry that that happened to you
00:26:59
that is terrible I laugh about it now
00:27:02
yeah it's it's nice to kind of be out of
00:27:04
it um to some degree right and it's like
00:27:07
okay now you don't have to necessar you
00:27:10
don't have somebody telling you you
00:27:11
can't wear a short skirt or spaghetti
00:27:14
straps or strapless um even um for my
00:27:17
sister I know that was a big deal too my
00:27:19
sister super tall she's taller than I am
00:27:22
and her legs just go for miles and so
00:27:24
just finding anything that fit her was
00:27:26
just also ridiculously hard you know and
00:27:29
yeah and I mean my parents were on the
00:27:31
board of a chief so if we showed up and
00:27:33
we got dress coded that was not a good
00:27:35
look right um yeah uh but so they kind
00:27:39
of they checked us like usually before
00:27:41
we left the house which I mean I'm sure
00:27:43
your mom did too I'm sure your mom went
00:27:45
you guys look amazing like we're gonna
00:27:47
go we're gonna have such a great time
00:27:48
and yeah to show up and then be told
00:27:50
like no your dress doesn't meet it's
00:27:52
like what are you talking about that is
00:27:54
just no are you kidding me yeah I mean
00:27:57
we would pull our birs down to as low as
00:27:59
we could so it could touch our knee and
00:28:01
then once if we did pass then we'd pull
00:28:03
our skirt back up like oh it's not
00:28:05
touching our knee or like pull our
00:28:07
shirts up as high as we could and then
00:28:09
once we were in pull them down a little
00:28:10
bit but my mom was like our biggest
00:28:12
supportive like you know you girls are
00:28:15
beautiful don't let them tell you
00:28:16
anything like she she was very
00:28:19
supportive and like she would remind us
00:28:21
like these are not your moms this is not
00:28:24
your mom I'm your mom and if I say it's
00:28:26
okay you can wear that and so so that
00:28:28
really helped cuz you know it's it does
00:28:30
leave a mark so um so to hear that you
00:28:34
know when we get dress coded even like
00:28:36
even if we didn't like she would say
00:28:37
like remember I'm your mom and you know
00:28:39
you only need to listen to me in my
00:28:41
rules like obviously respect the other
00:28:42
moms um and like you look beautiful you
00:28:45
don't have to dance with a guy you don't
00:28:48
want to so like to have those pet talks
00:28:50
before um was really helpful because
00:28:52
there was times where we would leave the
00:28:54
dance like sometimes crying because you
00:28:56
know people moms would make comments and
00:28:59
stuff so our mom was very supportive and
00:29:02
sometimes she would like you know drop
00:29:04
us off because it was just easier not to
00:29:05
be there the drama and by the time we
00:29:08
went high school we we had a backbone we
00:29:12
could stand up for ourselves where I
00:29:14
think that started causing friction
00:29:16
between some homeschool moms um but by
00:29:19
that point we were just like you know
00:29:21
you can't tell us what to do yeah which
00:29:23
was not good I'm not saying that was the
00:29:25
right thing but like we just had to
00:29:27
start standing up for ourselves cuz it
00:29:29
it was either stand up for ourselves or
00:29:30
let it affect us in the life in the long
00:29:33
run yeah so I yeah I we were talking
00:29:36
before we started recording about those
00:29:38
dances and and um and we were talking
00:29:42
about you felt safe dancing with me
00:29:45
because I wasn't a creep and firstly I
00:29:47
appreciate you saying that and that's
00:29:48
not to toot my own horn but um but it
00:29:51
it's funny because I think the only
00:29:53
comments that ever got made to me at
00:29:54
those dances was I had one dad come to
00:29:56
me after I had danced with his daughter
00:29:58
and he said I didn't like the way that
00:30:00
you touched her and I was like okay and
00:30:04
I don't know what you want me to do
00:30:06
about it I I didn't like I didn't feel
00:30:08
like I did anything wrong and I it was
00:30:10
not the intention right um and the
00:30:13
result of that was I never danced with
00:30:14
her ever again and I always felt really
00:30:16
bad um because years later she found out
00:30:18
that like that was the reason and she
00:30:20
was so mad at her dad for it um H
00:30:24
because he couldn't tell me what I did
00:30:25
wrong he just was like oh I didn't like
00:30:28
whatever I was like but what about it
00:30:30
did you like and it's like it's you know
00:30:32
it's just like those little comments
00:30:34
like that can dig at you and and yeah
00:30:35
really get you upset and bothered which
00:30:37
is like not a good thing you know yeah
00:30:40
definitely not I don't know if you
00:30:42
experienced this at all but another very
00:30:45
common thing in The Homeschool Group was
00:30:47
if you were dating um a lot of
00:30:50
homeschool families a lot of Christian
00:30:51
families in general do this but they do
00:30:53
the whole like courtship before you're
00:30:55
dating parents are very invol
00:30:58
they go on the dates with you that kind
00:31:01
of thing but like did you have to
00:31:03
experience anything like that um no I so
00:31:08
it was kind of confusing like my mom's
00:31:09
role is we couldn't date until we were
00:31:11
16 but my dad's role is 18 um so I just
00:31:14
didn't date I was like there's just I
00:31:16
don't want to date it's too much drama
00:31:18
um and I I was more into the partying
00:31:22
and like other things you know besides
00:31:25
dating so that really wasn't my focus
00:31:27
until after After High School I did have
00:31:29
crushes and I'm sure my mom knew who my
00:31:32
crushes were CU I probably was horrible
00:31:34
at hiding them um but I never
00:31:37
experienced it but I would see things
00:31:40
that would happen that was like that's a
00:31:42
little interesting or like you know the
00:31:44
courtships was I think I saw so many
00:31:47
courtships that it just freaked me out
00:31:49
that I didn't want to I didn't want to
00:31:51
be in one I would hear what the rules
00:31:53
were what you had to do and it was just
00:31:55
like no not that my mom would make me do
00:31:57
that like my mom was super chill about
00:32:00
that stuff but it was the pressure
00:32:02
coming from everyone and I really feel
00:32:06
bad saying this I really did not want to
00:32:08
date a homeschooler um so my interest
00:32:12
was
00:32:13
never in The
00:32:15
Homeschool like area I had crushes and
00:32:17
stuff but they were just more like for
00:32:19
fun I was a high schooler you know
00:32:22
thirsty kind of thing but it was never
00:32:24
like oh I I want to marry him or I love
00:32:26
him it was just like yeah cute let's
00:32:28
mess with him but yeah no I'm I'm really
00:32:31
thankful I never experien this and I'm
00:32:34
sorry you did but I just yeah I think
00:32:37
that would have scarred me if I did no
00:32:39
you I think we both let out um now being
00:32:42
married to non- homeschoolers because I
00:32:45
I don't know about your husband but my
00:32:46
wife definitely points out some of my
00:32:48
weirdness and has helped me overcome
00:32:51
certain things where she's like I don't
00:32:52
get why you get hung up on this and it's
00:32:54
like it's it's the upbringing thing yeah
00:32:57
that she did didn't have to deal with
00:32:58
that and so she's just like she's cool
00:33:01
she's normal you know um so to speak I
00:33:03
mean we're all normal in our own ways
00:33:04
but oh yeah totally that's exactly how
00:33:07
my husband loves to point out like oh
00:33:09
your homeschooler showing or is that
00:33:12
something you guys did in homeschooling
00:33:13
like the swing dancing and like certain
00:33:16
shows like I wasn't allowed to watch
00:33:17
SpongeBob or like w wizards of wly place
00:33:20
and he's like oh it's the whole school
00:33:22
in you and it's like yeah but I'm also
00:33:24
glad I didn't watch SpongeBob now um but
00:33:27
like there's things like that that he
00:33:29
likes to make jokes about and now I I
00:33:31
think it's funny cuz I'm like oh my God
00:33:32
that's actually pretty hilarious that
00:33:34
what I thought was still normal is not
00:33:36
normal so yeah it's all within the
00:33:39
context of what you live in right it's
00:33:41
like it yeah you realize you don't
00:33:43
realize until after the fact that you're
00:33:45
like that was not that was not normal um
00:33:48
in any sense of the word but um let's
00:33:51
talk let's pivot a little bit and talk
00:33:53
about post homeschool years and like
00:33:56
kind of going into
00:33:58
career path you're now a mom um like
00:34:02
what what did that look like for you um
00:34:05
it was very challenging um because I
00:34:08
think the main thing was my parents got
00:34:10
divorced when we were 17 so um senior
00:34:14
year they were we were going like our
00:34:16
family was like separating and it was
00:34:18
just really a really dark time so by the
00:34:20
time that all finished and I finished
00:34:22
high school um I just was in a very dark
00:34:25
place and so I really just focused on
00:34:27
partying drinking and all the things
00:34:30
you're not supposed to do um so I was
00:34:33
still in Community College I had been in
00:34:37
Community College all throughout High
00:34:39
School uh which I'm very thankful my mom
00:34:41
had us do uh so I was continuing my
00:34:44
community college education during that
00:34:46
time but I was so into partying and all
00:34:48
that I was failing my classes so um I
00:34:52
ended up taking some time off from
00:34:54
college and just working uh like just
00:34:58
like low-end jobs and because I just
00:35:00
wasn't ready I wasn't ready to go back
00:35:01
to college I was dealing with a lot of
00:35:03
stuff um and finally I think maybe two
00:35:08
years after out of high school two or
00:35:10
three years uh my mom sat me down and
00:35:12
was like you know you really need to go
00:35:15
do something to make you happy because I
00:35:17
was finally getting out of my hearty
00:35:20
face and just bad lifestyle and so she
00:35:24
recommended that I do ywam which is used
00:35:27
with a mission it's like a six-month
00:35:28
Mission strip and so I just needed a
00:35:32
change there was so much change that had
00:35:34
happened in the last 2 three years that
00:35:35
I just needed basically to get away and
00:35:38
so I did I went to Germany and Malaysia
00:35:41
for a total of six months um and that
00:35:44
just changed my life I think I just
00:35:46
needed to heal I needed to repair my
00:35:48
walk with God and deal with everything
00:35:51
that um felt normal in my childhood uh I
00:35:55
needed to just deal with that because it
00:35:57
was not normal and being homeschooled
00:35:59
you're so isolated even though you're
00:36:00
doing all these extracurriculars you're
00:36:02
still very isolated um so I felt trapped
00:36:06
for a lot of that um so to deal with
00:36:08
that and heal was very helpful and then
00:36:10
once I came home I was ready to go back
00:36:12
to school so I finished Community
00:36:15
College then the pandemic hit and that
00:36:17
just was really hard um but I made it
00:36:21
through you know my husband who was my
00:36:23
boyfriend at the time really helped me
00:36:26
pass Community College
00:36:28
and if it weren't for him I would not
00:36:29
have a degree or my mom my mom really
00:36:32
pushed us um she I know there's that
00:36:36
stigma that like the mom sto After High
00:36:38
School my mom was with me till I got my
00:36:41
bachelor's degree this past year like
00:36:43
she never gave up she always helped me
00:36:46
with FAFSA she always helped me with
00:36:48
classes like you know even being 21 she
00:36:51
was doing things with me to help me get
00:36:54
my college education so um so then I
00:36:58
finally got accepted to a university
00:37:00
after Community College and then got my
00:37:03
degree in Communications and it was hard
00:37:05
because when I look at it I'm like I
00:37:08
basically was in college for like well
00:37:10
including high school over like 10 years
00:37:13
but aside from that it was it was
00:37:14
probably like four years and so to see
00:37:17
my friends that are my age who got their
00:37:19
degrees like three four years ago and I
00:37:21
just got mine this year was a little
00:37:23
challenging but now I feel like so much
00:37:26
in a better place cuz I'm like
00:37:28
everyone's journey is different and at
00:37:31
least I got my degree that was my only
00:37:33
goal in life like sounds silly but my
00:37:36
only goal in life was to just get my
00:37:38
bachelor's degree because we had gone
00:37:40
through so much that I just needed to
00:37:43
know I could do it because like hearing
00:37:45
your whole life from my dad like oh you
00:37:48
know you're not smart enough and you
00:37:50
know college degrees are worthless and
00:37:52
things like that to know that I was able
00:37:54
to do it was so empowering for me and so
00:37:57
have that college degree be married and
00:37:59
have a kid like it's been amazing but I
00:38:02
am really thankful because my mom she
00:38:05
basically held my hand the whole time
00:38:07
and I'm so thankful for that because I
00:38:08
know a lot of kids didn't have that uh
00:38:11
but she just she really believed in all
00:38:13
of us and pushed us and you know we were
00:38:17
we were monsters to her all of us with
00:38:19
getting our degree but she never gave up
00:38:21
on us and now all her kids have a
00:38:24
bachelor's degree or master's degree so
00:38:26
I'm really thankful and that's just
00:38:28
where it's been so don't ask me what I'm
00:38:30
doing with my degree now because I can't
00:38:32
answer that but I have it that's okay
00:38:35
hey you you have a six-month-old so I
00:38:37
mean you are allowed to play mom for the
00:38:40
time being um yes for as long as you
00:38:42
want um and you know and also I mean
00:38:45
degrees it doesn't mean you ever have to
00:38:48
use it you will use it regardless but
00:38:50
it's just yeah and you know what's so
00:38:52
interesting is that I think in The
00:38:55
Homeschool Community there's kind of
00:38:57
this idea especially in a Christian
00:38:59
homeschool community that everybody's
00:39:01
family is like super happy behind the
00:39:04
scenes and like things are going well
00:39:06
and like you know and that's just not
00:39:08
the case the more and more I talk to
00:39:10
people the more I realize like oh my
00:39:12
gosh like their parents hated each other
00:39:13
or as siblings like they really don't
00:39:15
get along or like you know there are
00:39:18
these insane things that we never knew
00:39:21
we going on behind the scenes um and so
00:39:24
every like you said everyone's journey
00:39:26
is like so vastly different and you know
00:39:29
obviously like congratulations to like
00:39:31
making it through and um yeah I never I
00:39:35
never want to judge anybody for like oh
00:39:37
it took you 10 years to get a degree
00:39:39
that's like you know it's like no you
00:39:41
did regardless how fast how quick you
00:39:43
how slow it doesn't matter like you did
00:39:45
it that's that's incredible yeah and
00:39:48
during all that you healed and you
00:39:50
traveled and you probably had incredible
00:39:53
experiences during that whole period as
00:39:55
well so so yes collaps to you um of
00:39:59
course that's wonderful and
00:40:00
congratulations that you said you
00:40:02
graduated this year like just a few
00:40:03
months ago wow yeah I graduated in May
00:40:06
so last of well technically I finished
00:40:09
in December but I walked in May so yeah
00:40:13
very cool well congratulations that's
00:40:15
amazing thank you that yeah I remember
00:40:18
walking through and that feeling of
00:40:21
like accomplishing something like that
00:40:23
is is huge and like I had parents too
00:40:25
who kind of like they
00:40:27
had prepped me to want to go to college
00:40:29
or at least to pursue something outside
00:40:31
of like being a homeschool kid and just
00:40:33
the way that my drive was I was like if
00:40:37
I don't go now I never am going to do
00:40:39
this and so I was like I can't I can't
00:40:41
stop so I went right from high school
00:40:43
into college and then did it in three
00:40:45
years mostly because I hated it there
00:40:47
because I was so used to like I liked
00:40:49
the homeschool experience of like hand
00:40:51
me a textbook and like hand me a
00:40:53
syllabus and I can just make it happen
00:40:55
um so like going to classes was like not
00:40:57
I didn't I didn't love that but like
00:41:00
doing it in three years and then walking
00:41:02
out of there being being like Oh my gosh
00:41:03
I did I did something like when I
00:41:05
figured out that I could do it in three
00:41:06
years I was like oh my gosh I'm going to
00:41:07
do this I I can make this happen and uh
00:41:11
yeah and I don't feel a desire to go
00:41:12
back and do any other type of higher
00:41:15
education I don't want a masters I don't
00:41:16
want a doctorate um but I still am
00:41:19
learning every day which like I think is
00:41:21
important um that's super cool for those
00:41:24
people who are thinking about
00:41:27
homeschooling their kids and I mean
00:41:29
you're a mom now so you actually can
00:41:31
like even speak to this probably better
00:41:34
than a lot of people can but like who
00:41:37
are thinking about homeschooling their
00:41:38
kids or doing like non-traditional
00:41:40
school for their kids like would you say
00:41:42
like yes like 100% do it you know are
00:41:45
you on the fence about it like what um
00:41:48
what goes through your head when it
00:41:48
comes to that kind of stuff I definitely
00:41:51
want to homeschool my kids for sure my
00:41:54
daughter right now but um I would love
00:41:57
to homeschool I think I would do it
00:42:00
probably the same way as my mom not
00:42:03
keeping us as sheltered and you know
00:42:05
under Rock she really educated us on
00:42:08
like old classic movies and music and
00:42:10
stuff so I appreciate that she didn't
00:42:12
block us um from that kind of stuff
00:42:15
which didn't make us resistant to her in
00:42:17
that area um so that's kind of the area
00:42:20
of how I would want to homeschool um you
00:42:23
know our kids someday uh and just the
00:42:25
freedom to do what I want want and teach
00:42:28
what I want and but also you know teach
00:42:31
what's out there in the world with a
00:42:33
little bit more control um I've just
00:42:35
heard some stories you know how the
00:42:36
public school system is now that it just
00:42:39
makes me a little nervous um but you
00:42:42
know it's it definitely will take a lot
00:42:46
it makes me nervous because I'm not a
00:42:48
patient person and so I know that you
00:42:52
know that would be challenging but uh
00:42:55
I'm definitely very open to it recommend
00:42:57
it to people because I do think it's
00:42:59
amazing I know a lot of homeschool
00:43:01
families now that are still in that
00:43:04
process and they love it and I think
00:43:06
it's so different now today than it was
00:43:08
for us in high school um since the
00:43:11
pandemic because everyone had to do
00:43:12
school at home so there's a lot more
00:43:14
resources there's a lot more um
00:43:17
educational books that people can use so
00:43:19
like I feel like there's way more
00:43:21
resources for families to use rather
00:43:23
than one or two specific curriculums um
00:43:27
and yeah I would just I would love that
00:43:29
my husband is a little on the fence you
00:43:31
know he doesn't want to have his thing
00:43:34
is I don't want to have weird homeschool
00:43:35
kids and I totally get that that's
00:43:37
completely valid but I just remind him
00:43:40
you know like I turned out okay like
00:43:42
people are so surprised when I tell him
00:43:44
I was homeschooled because I have very
00:43:46
good social skills um so I always
00:43:49
encourage him like you know I would I
00:43:50
would do it to the best of my knowledge
00:43:52
of what I was trained and brought up in
00:43:55
my family but I know he is nervous for
00:43:58
that so hopefully that's our goal is to
00:44:02
homeschool um or just have a little bit
00:44:04
more control of the education that we
00:44:06
give our kids yeah that freedom yeah I
00:44:09
think Co changed it for a lot of people
00:44:11
right that freedom to be able to like to
00:44:13
go do stuff I did school at Disneyland
00:44:15
one day like I heard on your podcast
00:44:18
that's awesome yeah and it was it was
00:44:20
one of those things where I think when
00:44:22
it actually was happening I was not
00:44:24
thrilled for it but after it had
00:44:25
happened it was fine because it was one
00:44:27
of those things where I'm pretty sure my
00:44:28
parents were like okay we want to go to
00:44:30
Disneyland on this day you got to have
00:44:32
all your school work done I didn't do it
00:44:34
so I had to take it with me and that
00:44:37
meant okay I got to sit in Disneyland
00:44:39
and work on math problems well this
00:44:41
sucks but it actually was a lot of fun
00:44:43
because Disneyland is as most people
00:44:46
know is a magical place great music
00:44:48
great smells characters walking around
00:44:50
magk exactly it made it actually so much
00:44:53
better than sitting at the kitchen table
00:44:55
um trying to knock it out so yeah that's
00:44:59
so cool but yeah I have so many friends
00:45:00
now who they had kids during the
00:45:03
pandemic or like right before the
00:45:05
pandemic and their kids are just
00:45:06
starting to hit like School ages and
00:45:08
they're like yeah we're thinking about
00:45:10
pulling our kids out and doing
00:45:11
homeschool and like going and traveling
00:45:12
the world and seeing stuff and I'm like
00:45:14
that is such a cool opportunity of like
00:45:17
yeah you can literally go anywhere you
00:45:19
can do it anywhere and there's so many
00:45:20
more resources than there were back in
00:45:23
the day and I think a big part like you
00:45:25
said you have great social skills um
00:45:28
your mom obviously did a killer job and
00:45:30
you were a Comm major so you also have a
00:45:32
degree in Communications which is
00:45:35
good but uh that being able to grow up
00:45:40
in a community of people helps so much I
00:45:43
think so many people think of homeschool
00:45:45
kids as just like they only exist at
00:45:47
home you know and maybe they come out
00:45:49
for a blue moon when they restock the
00:45:51
pantry um but that was just not the case
00:45:55
I think for a lot of our friends is just
00:45:56
we
00:45:57
we had friends we had community and yeah
00:46:00
had lonely moments and stuff like that
00:46:01
but it was we were around people um yes
00:46:06
and that's that's the killer thing
00:46:08
that's what gets you uh socialized with
00:46:10
people so yeah tell your husband not to
00:46:13
worry um
00:46:14
because yeah I'm sure I'm sure you will
00:46:17
do a great job and I'm sure your mom
00:46:19
again will hold your hand and be like uh
00:46:21
you're doing this wrong oh yes she is my
00:46:24
biggest supporter but also my biggest
00:46:26
critique person so and I'm sure she
00:46:29
would love to be part of that process
00:46:30
with her grandkids so yeah hopefully
00:46:33
we'll see yeah she'll be like I don't
00:46:35
want to teach but you know bring me in
00:46:37
as an adviser um yeah yeah right the
00:46:40
principal yeah field trips I'm in um
00:46:43
exactly oh my gosh yes don't give her
00:46:46
any ideas anyway I'm trying to think is
00:46:49
there anything else you want to say to
00:46:50
hes School families or any other I don't
00:46:53
know stories that have popped up in your
00:46:54
brain of just like oh my gosh this one
00:46:56
time
00:46:58
um yeah otherwise like this has been
00:47:02
fantastic no I mean I think I would say
00:47:04
like you know for the moms out there is
00:47:07
it's okay to talk to your kids I feel
00:47:09
like that's something that I saw growing
00:47:11
up was so there wasn't a lot of
00:47:12
communication with parents and kids I
00:47:15
mean maybe I'm wrong but it just seemed
00:47:16
like there's a lot of with friends that
00:47:18
I have now that were homeschooled of
00:47:20
like oh I didn't know this or I wasn't
00:47:22
taught this um especially about like
00:47:24
when it came to like sexual uality and
00:47:28
Purity relationships um you know I think
00:47:32
it's obviously it's awkward but I think
00:47:34
it's important that that conversation is
00:47:36
out there because especially now like
00:47:38
social media is everywhere and so um you
00:47:41
know if you don't talk about it someone
00:47:42
will go find it and get the information
00:47:45
that they want and I was thinking about
00:47:47
it before I came on here I was like I
00:47:49
didn't have like Instagram or SnapChat
00:47:53
or Tik Tok when I was like in junior
00:47:55
high I think High School's when that
00:47:57
stuff started to come out but even then
00:47:58
I wasn't as into it then um I had
00:48:02
Facebook but like that was like you know
00:48:04
barely anything and so um but it it is
00:48:08
so different nowadays because I see it
00:48:11
challenging and damaging some kids
00:48:13
because they're looking for that void of
00:48:16
like what am I missing and like you know
00:48:18
how do I look perfect and all that stuff
00:48:20
and that's something that I want to make
00:48:22
sure I do with our kids is just having
00:48:24
that open conversation um um so just an
00:48:28
encouragement to Future homeschoolers is
00:48:31
just be open it sucks and it's horrible
00:48:33
and I hated having those conversations
00:48:35
with my mom but I'm thankful now because
00:48:38
there's things that I know that you know
00:48:40
a lot of my friends didn't know um
00:48:42
there's things that I also did had no
00:48:44
idea about that I learned from a lot of
00:48:47
my friends and so it was like back and
00:48:48
forth but um obviously no parent is
00:48:51
perfect and no family is perfect but um
00:48:54
I think people just think homeschooling
00:48:56
you know a lot of bad documentaries have
00:48:59
been put out there now and like you know
00:49:01
they're under a rock and isolated and
00:49:03
don't come out like you said unless to
00:49:04
fill their Pantry but like it really is
00:49:07
a beautiful thing and to see even
00:49:09
homeschoolers now out in public at the
00:49:11
park and hanging out it's just it's so
00:49:14
fun because it's like this is what like
00:49:16
it is like this is what homeschooling is
00:49:19
like you know we're out we're outside
00:49:21
we're in nature we're doing school at
00:49:23
the park you know so yeah that's just my
00:49:26
little SP no absolutely I 100% agree
00:49:28
with you and it's also never too late
00:49:31
you know there's lots of things that my
00:49:32
my parents uh we didn't talk about when
00:49:35
I was a kid and now we're talking about
00:49:36
and we have that open line of
00:49:38
communication so I love what you said
00:49:39
there about parents just being willing
00:49:41
to talk to their kids about anything and
00:49:43
everything uh whether it's it could be
00:49:46
yeah anything and everything sex
00:49:47
included um please for the love of God
00:49:50
um we need better sex education in this
00:49:51
world pleas educate the kids it's never
00:49:54
too late so I love that I love that you
00:49:56
added that and yes
00:49:58
homeschooling has it seems like been
00:50:00
fantastic for both of us it had its ups
00:50:02
it had its downs but ultimately it was a
00:50:05
plus um it got an A+ so um yes anyway
00:50:09
Laura this has been fantastic um and uh
00:50:12
thank you again for coming on the show
00:50:14
I'm so stoked to reconnect with you and
00:50:16
hear what's going on and congrats on
00:50:19
your degree and a new baby and all of
00:50:22
the wonderful things that are happening
00:50:23
in your
00:50:24
life thank you for having me this so
00:50:27
much fun all right guys until next time
00:50:31
uh this has been the ex- homeschoolers
00:50:32
club and uh if you enjoyed feel free
00:50:34
leave that like leave a subscribe do all
00:50:36
the things you know um to do on the
00:50:40
social medias and uh until next time
00:50:42
we'll see you later all right bye
00:50:45
[Music]
00:50:56
[Music]

Episode Highlights

  • Homeschooling Journey
    Laura shares her lifelong homeschooling experience, highlighting both ups and downs.
    “I had a really good decent experience but there were some ups and downs for sure.”
    @ 01m 38s
    August 21, 2024
  • The Isolation of Homeschooling
    Laura reflects on the isolation she felt from missing out on typical school events.
    “I was so isolated and missing out on the sports, proms, and homecoming.”
    @ 03m 30s
    August 21, 2024
  • TV Show Experiences
    Laura discusses her background work in various TV shows and the challenges she faced.
    “I was on New Girl and looked so miserable in that episode!”
    @ 05m 33s
    August 21, 2024
  • Acting Dreams
    Laura and her sister pursued acting from a young age, inspired by their older sister.
    “Since we were little, we wanted to be like an actress.”
    @ 06m 34s
    August 21, 2024
  • Dress Code Dilemmas
    Navigating dress codes was a challenge, especially for girls. 'You might as well just wear a t-shirt and a skirt down to your ankles.'
    @ 24m 27s
    August 21, 2024
  • The Journey to a Degree
    After years of challenges, getting a degree felt empowering. 'My only goal in life was to just get my bachelor’s degree.'
    @ 37m 38s
    August 21, 2024
  • The Reality of Homeschooling
    Many families in the homeschool community face challenges that aren't visible on the surface.
    “Their parents hated each other or siblings really don’t get along.”
    @ 39m 12s
    August 21, 2024
  • Graduation Accomplishments
    Celebrating the achievement of graduating, regardless of the journey taken.
    “Accomplishing something like that is huge.”
    @ 40m 21s
    August 21, 2024
  • Open Conversations with Kids
    Encouraging parents to have open discussions with their children about important topics.
    “It's important that that conversation is out there.”
    @ 47m 36s
    August 21, 2024

Episode Quotes

  • I was like, I want to fill that void of having public school friends.
    Confessions of a Homeschool Bad Girl | EXHS #5
  • I was just a good housewife, cooking and sewing.
    Confessions of a Homeschool Bad Girl | EXHS #5
  • You work so hard as a junior higher, you want to look cute.
    Confessions of a Homeschool Bad Girl | EXHS #5
  • I laugh about it now, it's nice to be out of it.
    Confessions of a Homeschool Bad Girl | EXHS #5
  • Everyone's journey is so vastly different.
    Confessions of a Homeschool Bad Girl | EXHS #5
  • It's okay to talk to your kids.
    Confessions of a Homeschool Bad Girl | EXHS #5

Key Moments

  • Homeschool Experience01:17
  • Isolation Feelings03:30
  • TV Show Background Work04:50
  • Cooking Skills14:51
  • Prom Memories20:55
  • Empowerment Through Education37:57
  • Homeschooling Myths48:56
  • Open Communication49:41

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown

Related Episodes

Did You Even Want To Be Homeschooled? | EXHS #10
October 02, 2024
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
57:11
Did You Even Want To Be Homeschooled? | EXHS #10
Was Homeschool The Best Choice For Me...Or My Parents? | EXHS #24
January 23, 2025
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
48:50
Was Homeschool The Best Choice For Me...Or My Parents? | EXHS #24
Did I Grow Up In A Homeschool Cult? | EXHS #17
November 25, 2024
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
01:03:02
Did I Grow Up In A Homeschool Cult? | EXHS #17
Homeschooling Taught Me To Code-Switch | EXHS #11
October 10, 2024
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
54:08
Homeschooling Taught Me To Code-Switch | EXHS #11
Did Homeschooling Prepare Us To Be Adults? | EXHS #14
October 30, 2024
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
49:15
Did Homeschooling Prepare Us To Be Adults? | EXHS #14
Homeschool Senior Ditch Day Goes WILD! | EXHS #13
October 24, 2024
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
01:10:01
Homeschool Senior Ditch Day Goes WILD! | EXHS #13
We Were Not The Cool Kids | EXHS #2
July 31, 2024
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
01:07:08
We Were Not The Cool Kids | EXHS #2
Our Weirdly Similar Homeschool Lives (Mime, Theater & Chaos!) | #30
March 20, 2025
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
01:07:38
Our Weirdly Similar Homeschool Lives (Mime, Theater & Chaos!) | #30
The Truth About Homeschool Kids | EXHS #1
July 24, 2024
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
20:09
The Truth About Homeschool Kids | EXHS #1
We Reunited After 7 Years… And Got Really Honest About Homeschooling | #33
April 10, 2025
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
53:58
We Reunited After 7 Years… And Got Really Honest About Homeschooling | #33
What Happens When Homeschool Kids Finally Enter the Real World?
May 15, 2026
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
54:04
What Happens When Homeschool Kids Finally Enter the Real World?
The Truth About Life After Homeschooling | #31
March 27, 2025
Captions not detected. You can watch the video, but not search it. If you think this is an error, contact support.
45:22
The Truth About Life After Homeschooling | #31