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hey welcome into the inaugural episode
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of the ex homeschoolers Club I am your
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ring Master General Jacob Gooden and I
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figured what better way to kick off this
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podcast than by kind of introducing
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myself sharing my homeschool journey and
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really breaking down a couple myths and
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questions that people have around
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homeschooling so my homeschool Journey
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started way back in 2004 I was 8 years
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old and I was going into second grade I
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had just moved brand new house brand new
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new town and for whatever reason my
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parents thought now is the time to
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homeschool our kid I'm not going to lie
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I hated it to begin with okay I was used
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to going to public school I'd gone to
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kindergarten in first grade in a regular
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classroom setting with a teacher and all
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of my fellow students so 5 days a week I
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was seeing my best friends I was playing
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with my best friends so go to go from
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that to all of a sudden I'm stuck at
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home seven days a week with my mom and
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my sister and my dad on the weekends it
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just was not great okay it was not what
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I wanted I wanted to be with my friends
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I wanted to be hanging out with them
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having fun playing on the playground uh
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doing school together and that just
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wasn't the case but things did
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eventually change and uh I fell more and
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more in love with being homeschooled so
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much so that by the time I was
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graduating in 2014 can't believe that's
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been a decade ago but uh by the time I
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was graduating I loved it right I was
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involved in a bunch of extracurricular
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stuff I had my own businesses I was
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really like self-educating myself so my
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parents handed me the curriculum and
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just said roll with it gave me a
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syllabus and I would you know turn
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things into them and get things graded
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and uh but I was really kind of
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self-taught and you know self-sufficient
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I then graduated and went to college did
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College in three years graduated with a
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bachelor's degree and uh it was such a
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shift to go from really being like a
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self-reliant self taught person to then
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all of a sudden again I'm in those
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School room settings I have other
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students I'm doing group projects so it
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was kind it was definitely a shift um to
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say the least and I missed the ability
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that I had in high school to really just
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kind of like do things on my own time
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because all of a sudden I was like I had
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to be a class at a certain time I had
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certain things that were due certain
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days you know um I had commitments right
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I had jobs I had all these things so
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definitely tricky um but the skills I
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learned in homeschooling have definitely
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come in clutch so many times both in
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college and then after college uh it's
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crazy I've been out of school now for
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seven years but uh I'm going to break
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down more my story as we go through some
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of these myths and talk about my
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experience kind of combating or
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experiencing some of these right so I
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think the most common myth that most
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homeschoolers hear is that homeschool
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kids lack socialization right we lack
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social
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skills this can for sure be true right
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we've all met that kid who can't look in
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the eye they don't know how to shake
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your hand when they're talking to you
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they Mumble under their breath they're
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hard to understand right it's very clear
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that they just kind of want to like go
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do their own thing I've been this kid
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and one of the things that my family did
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thankfully to combat this was my parents
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pushed me to be in a bunch of
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extracurricular stuff right uh which
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kind of plays into another myth which is
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that homeschoolers don't do
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extracurricular activities this in my
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experience with my family and my friends
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was just not true right we did things we
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were in sports uh speech and debate
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dance class music we did all kinds of
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stuff outside of home uh Church groups
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all that kind of stuff to be around
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other people right when you put yourself
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around other people you start to learn
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what is socially acceptable and what's
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not and uh so yeah to talk about my
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favorite extracurricular activity uh it
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ended up being swing dance to be to be
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quite honest when I was 12 years old my
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mom put me in a dance class I absolutely
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hated her for it I begged her not to go
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uh I was 12 years old and uh you know
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starting to hit puberty I felt really
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weird in my body I didn't want to be
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dancing with girls I didn't want to
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touch girls I didn't want to be anywhere
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near them right um but within a couple
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weeks it was just kind of like I I kind
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of fell in love with it right and I and
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by the time I was graduating by time I
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was 18 I loved swing dance so much so
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that I was helping put on school dances
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I was putting on dances at my own house
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uh I was teaching swing dance I was like
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super involved in it I learned a bunch
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of different styles East Coast West
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Coast Lindy Hop Charleston I'd gone into
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ballroom dance so i knew how to do the
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Walts and the tango and the chaa and uh
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even was involved in some English
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country dancing which uh if you don't
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know what that is that's basically like
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Pride and Prejudice era line dancing uh
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so a little doy do uh very very fun also
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very cringey to look at um we had our
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school dances were not like regular
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school dances where you know we had a DJ
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or anything that like that our school
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dances were very much like swing music
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ballroom music and English country dance
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and uh we did a couple themes like sock
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hop which was always super fun very like
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50s we did an English country dance
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where people would dress up kind of in
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that like Renaissance uh era fashion so
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big ball gowns and guys would wear long
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pet coats and stuff like that and uh
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it's funny to look back on and find
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photos of that and be like we really did
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that that's so cringy but uh but I loved
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it that was like my favorite favorite
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thing about being a homeschool kid and
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my extracurricular activities I guess so
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another myth surrounding homeschooling
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is the idea that homeschoolers have an
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inferior education and that they're
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taught by unqualified teachers in my
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experience I don't have an inferior
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education I think I have a fine
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education I also have a mom who worked
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really hard to make sure that I had the
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right level of Education to get to
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college that was her goal from day one
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of hes schooling me uh was I need to
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make sure that my kids have enough
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education to get into college right and
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good enough grades to get into college I
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don't know if that's true of every
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homeschool family that was just true of
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mine my mom also had a college
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degree with she was going to be an
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English teacher so she had she knew how
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to teach kids uh primarily high school
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and college level but she was able to
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translate a lot of that into what we
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were doing uh and so you know I don't
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know again it's one of those myths where
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I think it is true I think there are
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parents out there who are not qualified
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to teach their kids but I think more
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likely than not most parents are
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completely qualified and with the amount
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of educational resources now uh
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surrounding like on YouTube and that
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colleges put out and things like that
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yeah your kid can get a great education
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from the luxury of their home right this
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myth of you know inferior inadequate
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education also plays into the myth that
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homeschool kids can't get into college
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right I'm living proof that that's not
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true um and granted you know I didn't go
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to Harvard I didn't go to Stanford
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nothing like that but I applied to six
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colleges and I got into all six and got
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offered scholarship opportunity at all
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six of them on not a brainiac I'm not
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the smartest kid uh in the classroom you
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know I'm not this this sharpest tool in
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the shed right but I I was able to do it
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I think where this comes from is
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that a lot of my friends as I talk more
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and more to them is like they're their
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parents
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viewed the education as like the goal is
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to get you through high school and so
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there was no prep there wasn't a lot of
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prep for college right it was like we'll
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figure out when we get there but but you
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know unlike a public school or a private
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school you don't have uh an adviser
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who's walking you through the whole time
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you're in high school walking you
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through the process of like this is what
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college applications look like this is
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what the faf cell looks like this is
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what college classes are going to look
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like right here's how to prepare for it
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here's how to do community service
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here's how to make yourself look the
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best you possibly can right so I think
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that because of the lack of
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understanding from parents on that front
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then it leads to a lack of homeschool
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kids not going to higher education or
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getting stuck in a community college
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situation um at least in my experience
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that also to say like I had a lot of
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other friends who they did go to college
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they did do four-year College some of
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them are in master's degrees now um
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they're like doing incredible things
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right when it comes to the actual
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process of getting into a college if
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your parents have done it right and kept
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transcripts and things like that then
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honestly you're not really going to have
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a problem because well like every
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homeschool is kind of looked at as a
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private school right and so it's like
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transferring from a private school or
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moving on from a private high school
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into
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college all right let's transition a
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little bit another myth surrounding
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homeschoolers is that homeschooling is
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only done for religious
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reasons I don't think this is as true
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anymore um you know it kind of plays
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into that like homeschooling is a new
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trend kind of a thing I know people who
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have been homeschooled since like the
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'90s
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uh since like the early 9s um but I
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don't think it's always for religious
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reasons especially today right I think
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Co taught a lot of parents and a lot of
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families that you can do school at home
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and it gives you sometimes the
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availability and the freedom to travel
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right to go see the world to go visit
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grandparents and I know that was a big
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part in my life too was like I did
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school at Disneyland one day you know we
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decided hey let's go to Disneyland uh
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and in between roller coasters I would
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do a math test or I would do a worksheet
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or you know I do some different things
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throughout the day right kind of one of
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the funnest coolest experiences um I
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think I've ever had uh doing school at
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an amusement park but also gave me the
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availability to like go visit my
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grandparents for a week in the middle of
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the school year and stay with them and
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do school at their house right um things
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that Normal public school kids didn't
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have the ability to do another example
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of this is the fact that by the time I
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was junior senior in high school you
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know I was driving I had jobs um I had
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my own businesses and so I also with
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homeschool I had the freedom to say I'm
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going to do school at night or late in
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the evening um you know in the afternoon
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I'm going to do it on the weekend this
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week or whatever and I was able to build
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my schedule to be a little bit more of
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its own like
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you know a little bit more of like an
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adult schedule I guess you could say
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like I could go to work in the morning
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or I could you know have a client take
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guitar lessons from me at you know uh 3:
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in the afternoon um kind of a thing you
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know so it gave me more freedom to kind
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of do those things getting back into
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religious reasons right
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okay most homeschoolers are homeschooled
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for religious
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reasons I have a hard time pushing back
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on this because my experience as a
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homeschool kid was that of a Christian
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homeschooler I was a part of acheve
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which was the association of Christian
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Home Educators of Ventura County so
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everybody who was a part of that and
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which was most of my friends we were all
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Christians right and even the the other
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homes School groups in the area were
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religious whether it was Catholic or
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just other uh another Christian
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Homeschool Group that maybe was a little
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bit a few more Towns over uh things like
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that but so so every for the most part
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every homeschooler I knew was a
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Christian and that dictated a lot
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of the way we looked at education right
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science was done from a religious aspect
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so
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creationism uh versus Evolution right
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creation wins over Evolution every
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single time right uh looking at history
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right through a religious lens of uh
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looking at math through religious lens
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weirdly enough uh not studying other
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religions as much that kind of
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thing that Trend also that myth kind of
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also lends itself to homeschool kids
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being sheltered right which is another
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myth that a lot of people have and
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that's like very true in the case of
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like religious homeschool education for
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the most part because when you have that
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religious Viewpoint you want to protect
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your kids from anything that you would
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view as unbiblical sinful right sex
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drugs and alcohol kind of a thing and uh
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that was true in my case I I always tell
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the story I laugh about this all the
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time but like my growing up you know
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there was movies have bad stuff in them
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right they've got language they've got
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sex scenes they've got drug usage
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they've got whatever and so there was a
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website uh that was done by focus on the
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family and they would rate all these
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movies and talk about anything that was
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problematic in them right whether it was
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cuss words uh you know language sex
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scenes you know uh in modest clothing
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all that kind of stuff and so so my
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parents could go on and they could read
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a review of this movie from a Christian
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lens and say yes you can go see this or
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no you can't go see this right and so it
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lent itself to me not being able to see
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a lot of movies uh but thankfully I had
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a friend who had this DVD player that
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was amazing basically you could put this
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like USB drive into it that you've
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downloaded files for certain movies and
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you could dictate what got taken out of
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the movie right so it would bleep out
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bad language it would take out sex
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scenes it could skip whole scenes that
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involved like you know uh drugs alcohol
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whatever so it was great because all of
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a sudden we got to start watching all
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these movies that were deemed
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inappropriate or we weren't allowed to
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watch but we got to watch an edited
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version of them this also kind of led to
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some weirdness because then later
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watching those movies it was like I
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don't remember this scene or I don't
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remember all this language being in this
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movie but uh but you know it was like it
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was cool in the moment right um
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especially when you're a kid and you're
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like well I want to go see this movie
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and you you can't right because Mom and
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Dad say it's got too much bad language
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in it sorry you know I think the
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sheltered thing it's hard I understand
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parents want to protect their kids right
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they want to keep them safe from the big
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bad world but I think that it also can
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hinder their kids a lot of times
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and so what I always encourage people to
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do and my family is not the perfect
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family to look at for this because it
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hasn't been until recently where we've
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been really open with each other to talk
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about things like sex like addiction uh
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you know like alcohol things like that
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religion even to explore ideas openly
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with one another and have conversation
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and have debate around those things and
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so rather than shelter your kids from a
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lot of things I think it's almost better
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to be open because a lot of that stuff
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is out in the world right but be open
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and have an environment for your kids
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where it's safe for them to talk to you
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about well why is this bad or why do we
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view this as wrong or why is this good
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and this is bad and you know all these
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different things so anyway I'll get off
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my soap box when it comes to that but I
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don't think that all homeschooling is
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done through the lens of like it has to
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be religious I think that is you know I
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think that was uh a period of time for
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sure but I think now less so um and yeah
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I don't think all homeschoolers are
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sheltered but I do think there a good
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number lastly getting into our final
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kind of myth is that homeschoolers are
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lazy and lack
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discipline I really don't think this is
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true uh from my experience it's not true
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um my mom had to work really hard to get
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us on a schedule I'll give her that you
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know but we we got there right it took a
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couple years but we figured out this is
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how we operate in school this is when
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this happens this is the time frame all
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those types of things so much so that by
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the time I was entering Junior High in
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high school a lot of my education really
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just came from my parents handing me a
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syllabus and a textbook and saying okay
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here's what you're going to do you're
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going to read this textbook you're going
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to fill out these worksheets you're
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going to turn them in and you know
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depending on where your grades are at
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you know we can come back and review
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with you or not if you're getting
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straight A's well we don't need to
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because obviously you understand the
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information so they put a lot of that
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expectation and need to to kind of
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self-discipline yourself to get things
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done on me which that is not lazy right
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that is the opposite of lazy uh you know
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I had a lot of discipline when it came
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to I've got to turn in XYZ by certain
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times I also by the time I was finishing
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High School worked multiple jobs uh I
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owned my own business um I did odds and
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ends jobs for people too and so I had
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kind of arguably like an adult schedule
00:17:29
right I had places that I had to be at
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certain times and I was responsible for
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all of that I was not relying on my
00:17:35
parents to get me there on time um I was
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not I had my own car so I was not
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relying on you know can I borrow the car
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I have it at this time you know and then
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I had the expectations of school and
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applying for college right so there was
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deadlines associated with all of that
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stuff and when I dropped the ball that
00:17:51
was my responsibility so for instance I
00:17:53
dropped the ball in Spanish uh so much
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so that it became well you're going to
00:17:57
have to do Spanish during the summer
00:17:59
right you got to make this up uh that
00:18:01
was on me that was my laziness uh but
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you know I really don't think that
00:18:07
homeschoolers are lazy there are stories
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obviously of people who you know they
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claim their homeschooling their kids and
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they're not they're just letting their
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kids sit around the house all day and
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watch TV I think that's very few and far
00:18:21
between uh my experience with me and my
00:18:24
friends was like we were all super super
00:18:27
responsible and you know we took our
00:18:29
education pretty seriously I think for
00:18:31
most of us but you know I can't say
00:18:36
that's part of what this podcast is for
00:18:37
is to talk to people and find out uh
00:18:40
their own experiences but it overall I
00:18:43
don't think that that myth is true um in
00:18:45
fact I think it's quite the opposite
00:18:47
because to be a homeschool family you
00:18:50
really do have to have discipline and
00:18:52
not be lazy uh because you know there's
00:18:56
no school bus coming at 6:00 in the
00:18:57
morning to pick you up it is you got to
00:18:59
get your butt out of bed uh and get
00:19:01
yourself to the dining table or the
00:19:02
school room or whatever uh to to get
00:19:05
things done so anyway that's just a
00:19:08
couple of the myths and questions that
00:19:10
people have surrounding homeschool you
00:19:12
know this I'm excited for this season um
00:19:16
you know if you haven't seen the trailer
00:19:18
this season I'm interviewing all my best
00:19:20
friends from growing up and we're asking
00:19:22
questions around their homeschool
00:19:24
experience and you know The Good the Bad
00:19:26
and the Ugly of it right it's not all
00:19:28
rainbows and unicorns so I'm really
00:19:31
stoked for you guys to hear it you know
00:19:33
if you enjoyed this episode please you
00:19:35
know follow subscribe you know leave a
00:19:38
rating if you feel so inclined but I'm
00:19:40
really stoked for this season it's going
00:19:42
to be a lot of fun and uh yeah until
00:19:44
next time I'll see you guys
00:19:49
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00:20:00
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