00:00:00
oh saak Sacramento Sacramento California we're on tour and we've got a couple
00:00:06
days left Sacramento California Sao Long Beach Long Beach Windsor onario no
00:00:11
Windsor Ontario Oh Canada then where else in Canada Niagara Niagara Falls
00:00:18
anio and then Tucson Arizona and where do we finish the tour Vegas 420 ineg I can't wait for that one badp pod.com is
00:00:25
where you're going to get those tickets badp pod.com we also have badri merch.com and
00:00:30
exclusive content uh mcone bony mcone is up there putting a bunch of stuff up from the tour you also have bonus
00:00:36
content available on the patreon go to patreon.com congratulations to everyone involved congratulations to you go to
00:00:42
badf friends pod.com thank you you two are bad friends who are these two idiots
00:00:47
a white dude and an Asian dude you two are disgusting you two are something we're
00:00:54
bad friends before we begin I want to say this okay okay me and Andrew had many discussions about about this right
00:01:01
and we just thought when your name came up to do it home run not home run we
00:01:06
left for 4 hours straight just the thought of you makes
00:01:12
us laugh so I just wrote the song for you oh yeah la la la Craig
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a I like your eyebrows one is thicker than the other
00:01:26
one you which is weird no yeah really no okay Rosy Cheeks he's got rosy cheeks I
00:01:35
got Rosa curly hair what yeah no just let us finish yeah yeah yeah let us do
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you have rosacea What's Rosa I I get red I guess I ate something spicy once and
00:01:47
between that and the dress up horribly funny I just turned red for like three months straight yeah yeah yeah your
00:01:53
whole body or just your face just my face yeah I ate something spicy once impossible that's impossible yeah yeah
00:02:00
so you ate salsa one time well it was like like Mexican salsa from like a oh hey hey hey
00:02:07
hey car no we have Mexicans here whoa
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two do you want to introduce him and yeah um uh let me do a little history
00:02:19
yeah do a little bit of a history I don't know how he got my number I don't know how that stop I know stop amazing
00:02:26
God your cheeks dude I just want to grab them I want to grab I grab right and I just want to go on your face
00:02:33
I really do so anyway um go ahead so um dude did you steal those from Santa
00:02:39
those cheeks dude those are so Rosy he stole them from Santa holy [ __ ] have you
00:02:45
seen the photos of Santa say ho ho ho real fast ho ho ho no that's not Santa I I will tip over if you make me laugh I
00:02:51
realize all right stop I'm not done I'm not done with the intro thank you so much for doing this by the way I love you so much but my point is is this um I
00:02:59
don't know how got my number but you know for years ago you started calling me to do your shows he does a show called horribly funny it's a wonderful
00:03:05
show it's a wonderful show it's probably the best bringer room is that it's not a bringer room no um promoted show outside
00:03:12
Booker in LA right we have about four or five guys that are outside promoters and
00:03:18
they have their um well they use the same people let's be honest yeah they do yeah yeah it's you and me yeah I know I
00:03:24
know yeah and then you always get Aro but that's a he gets Areno all the time
00:03:31
right and then um who hasn't aged he like he looks the same as he did when you did he really does it's a
00:03:37
little creepy how young creepy he looks young anyway he's the best promoter but every time we're backstage and I look at
00:03:43
you're you're always in a puddle of sweat yeah you're just a bu bundle of nerves and you don't know how to relax
00:03:50
yeah yeah and I asked you questions back there um make him so nervous I know what do you make him nervous who who who
00:03:56
makes you more nervous me or Andrew Bobby there's no one that makes me more
00:04:02
nervous than you back there Andrew like shows up 15 minutes early he you know he's peaceful and and just doesn't wait
00:04:09
wait wait you're great he's peaceful like it's like he's meditating like oh so he's like Namaste yeah right and I'm
00:04:16
chaos and I had to wrestle Orie Adams like you know so that he doesn't go on
00:04:21
stage because you don't want him watching you wait wait a minute or Adams didn't want to watch Bobby no Bobby
00:04:27
didn't want or Adams to watch him oh right yeah yeah you know why why he's
00:04:32
judgy oh and I don't like judgy oh oh you don't want him to see your material
00:04:38
then say something no I just don't want him to be there I love him as a human oh right I just don't want him to watch no
00:04:43
watch to you does he want to watch you what does he care about watching you he likes to watch me and I say no but
00:04:49
anyway um but so I'm so out of all the comics you hire I'm the one that stress m is it because I'm the only one that
00:04:56
really asks you questions about life well that too but honestly you also make me the most happy like whenever I text
00:05:02
and you actually respond I get the Zoomies I like like a dog yeah I I don't
00:05:08
know what to do with myself like you run around yeah W it's like the part in Black Swan where I just hold my phone
00:05:13
against my chest and drop to my knees you know it seems is that the right movie it seems sexual no no no no you're
00:05:20
not sexually attractive no no no no no no no no no wait what do you mean no no no too many no not at all like he's not
00:05:28
he's not attractive at all no he's very attractive yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah but I'm not your type no it's not that it's
00:05:34
just I'm very grateful and lucky to be working with you you're worth every text
00:05:41
you know I text you so many times to get a response and and I just I I hear that
00:05:46
Andre I'm worth every text yeah every non-response when you finally do respond yeah oh I was getting a little personal
00:05:54
we have different experiences that I'm going to put that on your uh Tombstone worth every text no me I am really worth
00:06:00
every text yeah yeah you know that I don't know yeah you do yeah you do though I don't know don't act shy and
00:06:07
cold I'm prompt I'm on time I'm always nice I always say hey thank you and then I leave immediately after my set I get
00:06:13
out of the Green Room I don't take any air you take a lot of air may I yeah
00:06:18
sound late never never then what the [ __ ] well it's it's I'm always early is
00:06:24
what he's saying I know but am I you're always early too but like getting you there it's getting get you there that's
00:06:30
getting me there what do you mean how many times has he canceled how many times has he canel on me believe it or not zero wow you think it's you Z who's
00:06:38
canceled more him or me there no he has no it was an accident
00:06:44
but it was oh but stop Yes but he has I've never canceled he just said it was an accident no no he said it was it was
00:06:50
like a miscommunication of booking one doesn't matter no I've never canceled no he hasn't canceled I've never canel he but he had he had been booked and he
00:06:57
didn't be he wasn't there no that's not true I knew early and and I I I I I did it I fixed me out you did it
00:07:06
no yeah um say your name properly it's Greg agop agop I call you a goop we call
00:07:12
you we call you the goop over here goop no way well your new name for this show is the goop the goop dog I think it's
00:07:18
the goop dog well you're goop you're goop you zies like a dog I love dog one
00:07:23
day I will I will be able to take care of one but for now I'm just taking care of me which is hard what do you mean
00:07:29
what do you mean it takes a lot to take care he has [ __ ] a thousand animals he can take
00:07:35
care of animals you're fine you can my for you page is all puppies and Bobby
00:07:41
Lee what is that on your dating profile as well do you say that to people my for you my fyp is Bobby Lee and puppies
00:07:49
they're they're the things that make I think not just me but lots of people very happy I agree I look both these things are wonderful stop kissing his
00:07:54
ass it's enough I had enough okay so how about this then okay okay what are you you I'm ethnicity wise Lebanese and no
00:08:03
okay my mom what why is that your mom's I've always wanted I never know I I
00:08:09
don't know okay I don't know either but like yeah you do know yeah I do know so why did you say that okay I my mother is
00:08:16
leban was born in Lebanon mhm my father was born in Syria oh okay lived in
00:08:24
Lebanon I'm Armenian so I'm just as lost as you are so wait you're you're
00:08:30
Armenian your mother's so Syrian and Lebanese that's what you are you're Syrian and Lebanese yeah can I ask a
00:08:35
question serious question I feel like if you were raised in that area and you were still there that you maybe wouldn't have survived no no I'm too bougie for
00:08:43
for that no I I just think something with something would have happened yeah I feel like they would have got
00:08:49
you you would open up a paper bag on the side of the road something would happen something boom I I didn't say that yeah
00:08:56
no honestly yeah I'm glad I'm I'm not there you I feel like you like a kebab I'm a vegetarian are you just SLE a
00:09:03
sleeper agent are you a sleeper agent dude dud when you do zingers you got to come you
00:09:09
got to come clean you got to come clean stay it clean you can't stumble on you have to say are you a sleeper
00:09:16
agent or give it to Carlos it to him write it down and then give it to him yeah anyway wait a minute you're a
00:09:22
vegetarian yeah are are you single uh single vegetarian no can I just say that I I I don't what I mean are you a single
00:09:30
vegetarian I stopped eating meat because I'm Miley Cyrus all right I want to say something did she say hold on did she
00:09:35
tell you not to eat meat anymore well I was really high at a Miley Cyrus concert twice and she just said we need to stop
00:09:41
eating our friends and I'm like when uh once in in New York City at Terminal 5
00:09:47
and then at the wilter theater in La and then I just
00:09:53
replaced I replaced all the meat for cheese and then I like gained 60 lbs goop dog I from not eating bread to just
00:10:00
eating bread yeah and and yeah I'm you went from meat to cheese and you gained 60 lbs in what span of time uh probably
00:10:08
two years oh that's not that bad okay yeah but then I just keep going so how long have you been a vegetarian since
00:10:14
2015 right so can I just ask you something and I I don't want to be mean you know I don't want I I don't
00:10:20
want to do it ask ask I don't ask you must eat a lot of vegetables no I don't eat any vegetables I love chips I love
00:10:28
chippies I see that's what Chi is so you're a vegetarian no vegetables at all yeah sometimes I sometimes I wake up in
00:10:34
the middle of the night because I I thought I heard a bag of Doritos like that's vegetarian you're more of a
00:10:39
carbar yeah yeah I literally I I buy the
00:10:45
vegetables you're a carpar dude just so good that's best life youve ever you're a carbet Arian and that's okay cuz
00:10:52
you're not eating meat and I and I agree with this by the way I understand this cuz meat meat can affect people very
00:10:57
negatively it gives people cancer yeah I eat meat but I'm trying to cut down on Bad Boy meat like hamburgers bad boy
00:11:05
meat right red meat bad boy meat I'm trying to eat fish and chicken I thought you GNA say fish and chips which is I'm
00:11:10
not eating you can have my chips I'll just the fish so you don't eat fish either I I can't touch it I can't cook
00:11:16
it but I I'm open to it more because you can't pet fish but like cows are so
00:11:21
dumb you know you could pet a you could pet a fish if you caught it if you caught a
00:11:26
fish you can pet it you don't want to I don't want to pet a fish what about people that have pet a fish as pets I
00:11:32
actually don't like when they there are places where you could pet starfish that's gross that's gross pretty gross
00:11:38
yeah okay so I need to hold on before we move forward what is your what is your
00:11:43
meal day consist of because then if you don't eat vegetables and you don't want no meat no veggies where's protein
00:11:49
coming from it can't be from Doritos cheese I lit only has a limited amount of protein in it I literally if I could
00:11:55
have chips for every meal they have every flavor in chips what was breakfast today today I was going to die since
00:12:01
like yesterday so like today I've had a a bagel and I don't usually eat Bagels but it has cinnamon and raisins in it so
00:12:07
it's sweet so I like sugar give me give me one day of meals yesterday like breakfast lunch dinner I like eggs so
00:12:14
you had eggs in the morning and I always Uber Eats or door Dash I don't cook right here right here yeah I do the same
00:12:20
meal same I'm the same and I don't even feel bad anymore like I I don't even look and you know what I think it's more
00:12:25
cost effective it is it really is because like I order groceries whenever like you know once a month and I
00:12:31
literally just throw them right away I have lots of vegetables in my fridge that I'm going to be throwing away in a week but like I won't even open it wait
00:12:38
so in the morning you have eggs just eggs yeah and then what happens at lunch it's door dash time chips oh uh door
00:12:46
dash time yeah it's you know there's lots of pizzas there's there's Mexican
00:12:51
food is easy to to switch there's just you know what's your favorite dinner to have yeah it used to be bar barbecue but
00:13:00
I do like barbecue sauce like you could put barbecue sauce on salad and still you know get the I I so you're putting
00:13:06
barbecue sauce on romae lettuce yeah oh yeah there's fake there's there there's
00:13:12
Beyond chicken no chicken impossible that sounds like a chicken imposs it is chicken
00:13:18
impossible so do do you know what you've ever had for dinner do you know what you've ever had what have you had for dinner last night what was dinner last
00:13:26
night oh I like you know it's not what you like what did you have do you know
00:13:31
what you did honestly I've been like freaking out about today for yeah like I
00:13:36
just let me say this let me cut you off yeah first of all we love you to death I think you're such you're you're a
00:13:42
standup guy you're so fun and you're very nice and you put together great shows and you're great to work with
00:13:48
you're responsive you're smart you're sweet you're cool you're the best outside promoter I've ever worked with
00:13:53
outside of that you're just a great guy great guy and I'm saying this I'm being genuine we love you we have you on the show because we love you don't be nervous we just want to have fun with
00:14:00
you but we adore you you're such a a wonderful human being your energy is you know if someone says like you have an
00:14:06
aura around you you have all the colors whoa you're the entire [ __ ] rain there's some colors missing huh there's
00:14:11
some colors missing which ones I mean he's not aggressive color no black there's no
00:14:18
black but there's no black on the rainbow oh right right that's true yeah there's no black you're the rain you're a [ __ ] the rainbow colors you have
00:14:23
all of them you have all the Rainbow thank you yeah can you feel that in your in your soul because you're a good human being I that's way too kind and way too
00:14:31
overwhelming I made it worse somehow I thought I was going to make it easier no no no no no uh I you know one of my
00:14:38
favorite things to do ever is is have an edible and then I like to turn off the lights and then I like to eat sour
00:14:44
Skittles in the dark with my eyes closed and I like and sometimes I suck too hard but like I have tasted the rainbow and
00:14:53
and it's pretty awesome like but then you have to know when to stop because if not you'll get cold sores in your mouth
00:14:59
but that's like my favorite thing to do and anything could be playing in the
00:15:05
background Taste the rainbow tonight but it has to be sour you get high you eat Skittles you get cold
00:15:12
sores yeah if you don't stop like if you don't stop you have to this is you tasting the
00:15:19
rainbow it's amazing what do you mean don't stop just a regular bag of Skittles is not that many Skittles I
00:15:24
know but like first I started with the regular Skittles which come in the mini bag and then I start eating the whole
00:15:30
sour Skittles and then one day I'm just like it's still early let's do a second bag of Skittles and then I woke up the
00:15:35
next morning and I couldn't move my mouth but it was too sore so like I couldn't even have
00:15:44
water no to stop oh God how are you alive Taste the rainbow how do you live
00:15:50
let's do the new phrase hey new phrase for Skittles Taste the rainbow know when to stop in modation in moderation
00:15:56
everything in moderation so um do you do that nightly oh I um that no I had to
00:16:03
stop because honestly like my mouth was going to fall apart so now special special treats it's a can I how old are
00:16:09
you oh I'm going to stick with 27 because honestly people that's what I've been saying since I was 27 yeah yeah
00:16:16
yeah yeah and how how many years have you been saying it no 10 I'm 27 you're 27 yeah you so
00:16:23
you really don't want to tell us your real age wait why does why
00:16:29
I'm 40 Bob's 52 I'm 52 I could get away with like just more if I was younger
00:16:35
what do you mean get away with what are you looking to get away with have you committed crimes no so what do you think you're getting away with you you're a
00:16:41
youngl looking guy you look healthy you have nice skin good hair let me see your teeth smile has Skittles taken care of yeah
00:16:49
have you lost a few no let me see are you look have don't smile with teeth let me just show me no show me your teeth
00:16:56
just show me teeth like this no why why my dentist this is like me trying to get my child to brush their
00:17:03
teeth at night no I can't this guy used to do standup how long did you do standup For many year actually like I
00:17:10
was freaking out so much today my brother sent me a video of me doing standup I feel like that part of me's died but I I I I but I I it felt I
00:17:19
thought I would hate it watching it but I liked it a lot yeah you were so funny it was the work ethic that kind of I
00:17:25
carried on into horribly funny yeah but your work ethic is a producer incredible if you just did that as a how long did
00:17:31
you do how many years did you do comedy I started in in 200 uh I think uh 16
00:17:37
probably okay and then you went for how long a couple years yeah and then I I probably I started horribly funny in
00:17:43
2017 at the lyric Hyperion which you're you're you're okay yeah uh uh yeah and
00:17:50
then uh I and then uh uh did the lodge room and then when I finally got horribly funny Into The Comedy Store
00:17:56
fulltime that's when I had to stop comedy because I was I burnt myself out I how many years is that two no probably
00:18:03
um probably um math oh I 2016 2017 2018
00:18:10
which of these years did it start one more 2019 maybe one more 2020 right before the pandemic yeah probably that
00:18:15
so you did about four years of stand up give or take yeah yeah probably yeah three to four years okay are is your
00:18:21
family here in Los Angeles oh no they're literally all dead um but except my
00:18:27
brothers like my stop stop bro bro that was out of pocket dude
00:18:34
stop it that's not funny caros it was just the unexpected obviously they're dead yeah
00:18:41
that's how I get to eat Skittles in door Dad I'm literally like you know that family is still alive mom and dad are
00:18:48
gone dad died last November this November oh [ __ ] oh my how how how uh oh you you guys aren't
00:18:56
going to like it uh I I guess it was a mixture between uh heart complications
00:19:02
and covid and uh and something else I think it was like another thing that
00:19:08
that was mixed into that he a vegetarian water in his no no no no I I'm going to
00:19:15
die soon too that's why like every every hor say that I freak out too much though
00:19:20
like you gotta that's that's why I brought you on to the show okay because we want to help you navigate we want you
00:19:26
to relax and have a different Outlook and just approach things a little differently you're not going to die
00:19:31
under you're not going to die under have you been to the doctor recently I could I could talk never actually I've gotten
00:19:37
away with not going to the doctor you've never been I don't know if you're getting away with it well here's the thing When We Were
00:19:44
Young our our the doctor family doctor said that our mother was sick because we were fat and then oh my
00:19:50
God was this a doctor it was an Armenian doctor which is equivalent to a dog doctor he's dead too he's dead too she's
00:19:58
dead yeah she's dead all right so hold on back it up your father passed away and we're very sorry about that in November dad is dead my dad were you
00:20:05
guys close you know um we could have been closer you know but but yeah I I
00:20:11
but basically my upbringing was super weird family moved from not weird it's not weird we they moved from Lebanon or
00:20:19
um and they just we lived in like there was four apartments and a house so like my whole family kind of lived there like
00:20:25
13 people and uh slowly they you know started dying so like so like it almost
00:20:33
looks like we did it on purpose or something it's like nine of them are dead or 10 of them like it's just me and
00:20:38
my brothers and a cousin left but like also before one of the horribly funnies one of my aunts died in my arms and then
00:20:44
I had to go like literally the same night to and like it was Theo Von was on
00:20:50
that night and Natasha lero and M I'm so sorry no no no no I was I was it's insane yeah I'm like lifting her head up
00:20:57
it's going back down oh so she died literally died in your arm how old was this woman God knows how old anyone is
00:21:04
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00:23:18
standing wait a minute CG so so hold on were you at her house we all live okay
00:23:26
so she calls you I think I'm dying yeah really yeah it was my brother calling I
00:23:31
think she's dying let's let's let's play it out ring ring hello sweetie yeah it's your
00:23:40
Aunt hello I'm dying okay I'll be right there right so you go up there and down
00:23:47
I'm leading oh down she used to live up there now doesn't matter does it [ __ ] matter kind of does cuz it could you
00:23:53
could have fell down all right all right um but so yeah all after it happened
00:23:58
forget it anyway and then you walked into her place no luckily she wasn't feeling well so my brother said oh hey
00:24:05
I'm going to go for one minute can you keep an eye out on her until I get back we're going to take her to the hospital and of course with my luck you know I'm
00:24:12
like you know talking to her making her laugh and then like her head just falls down and then I'm like wake up or I'm
00:24:18
going to call 911 and and then I keep like bringing up her
00:24:23
head and it keeps falling her down what and then wake up for around to call 91
00:24:29
what so wait a minute minute yeah so so is it the building does it as
00:24:36
asbestos in it is everyone dying cuz the building black mold is the building dangerous I don't know but you still
00:24:41
live there I I live there I live there alone we got to get you out no I like it
00:24:47
I have to much you live in a four four flored apartment by yourself the whole
00:24:53
thing no no I had to they wouldn't let me live in the house by myself so I moved to one of the apartments and you
00:24:59
know who's they my brothers okay so how many many brothers do you have two and
00:25:04
so your mother passed away how long ago oh she had Ms so yeah I don't remember
00:25:10
so your mother passed away a long time ago your father just died years and and your are your brothers in you close yeah
00:25:15
yeah okay so they're the ones that get you through yeah but did they think that you're the next next no they I mean do they are
00:25:24
they what I'm saying is are your brothers worried about you all like yeah but they also know that like you know I
00:25:30
they're not going to be able to get me to like go on walks sometimes they trick me like like they trick me into going to
00:25:36
the park the other day how they trick you Skittles no coffee coffee but I
00:25:42
can't have coffee either I have to do Decap and you know why because of this cuz you know I had to yeah I you know I
00:25:48
didn't want to cuz I didn't want to freak people out backstage with being nervous oh wait a minute but coffee
00:25:53
makes you nervous yeah everything makes me nervous well how can we get you not nervous yeah I guess I I don't know this
00:26:00
is an invasive question but I feel like we love you and we're getting closer do you can you come a little bit more if
00:26:06
you come I'm on Lexapro you can't come no I've already asked them questions like that yeah and and and I mean cuz I
00:26:14
think maybe com I think you're asexual I'm just not interested in putting myself out there like but you like [ __ ]
00:26:20
yeah I just don't like I don't like that you know I just don't want to be hurt
00:26:29
you don't want to be hurt you are a rock star no I'm not yes I'm a comedian I'm I
00:26:34
think like people ask like you know I have options as a promoter half my job is to keep my pants on the other half is
00:26:41
to you know book book great shows with with I don't think that's the first half I don't I don't think think so I think
00:26:47
the first half would be book a good show okay book a good show keep your pants on and we're ready to go but like I'm you
00:26:52
know I'm I'm I'm out of shape I don't take care of myself I don't like compr
00:26:58
selfesteem issue oh that to start with but also like when you do the math I'm really at the moment I'm really happy
00:27:04
alone like I'm really H like if there I'm like at night I sleep considering a dog and I'm just like I just don't want
00:27:10
anything breathing in the house which sounds bad but like I just don't want responsibility I don't want liability
00:27:17
you know I don't like sharing things it's not going to work with me I think I've made myself too comfortable okay but as a 27-year old man oh now it's
00:27:25
it's cuz we know it's a lie yeah ask could be trick do you ever masturbate
00:27:32
uh I think you need to come Greg I think you need to come and I mean this I don't you're backed up I think you don't need
00:27:37
to go out with look you don't need to have you can be being single is there's nothing wrong with living I'm single
00:27:43
dude yeah there's not there's no one judging that but I'm saying like for your mental and and and physical health
00:27:49
of your brain and body you do need to come you I think you need to come a little bit once in a while you
00:27:56
have like a doctor oh no wait because it burns no when you come does it burn you
00:28:04
don't enjoy it you don't like it honestly and that's you know what I take it all back you you I want you do
00:28:09
whatever makes you comfortable I do think your jitteriness may be relieved by a little bit of tension relief yeah I
00:28:15
I really don't know okay let's move on then I feel like uncomfortable no no I we we don't want to make you feel
00:28:20
uncomfortable at all I'm just curious cuz I want you to be more relaxed in life cuz I feel like when I walk in the back room there you're going to have an
00:28:27
ISM I feel like you're so nervous that and I'm like you got to chill everything's okay Andre and you've done such a good job so it's like I went to
00:28:34
Paulie's Christmas party yeah I go up I look through the window just to see who's there and I see Harland some bunch
00:28:41
of people and I see this guy sitting on the couch yeah like he's like with his both hands like this and I stared him
00:28:47
for like 3 minutes he wasn't talking to anybody he was just sitting there with his Ros Rosy Cheeks right and then when
00:28:53
I came into the party you didn't move from that position at all you were there for hours H yeah but I was talking to
00:28:59
Harland and and and some of the other Comics before oh okay yeah I was there early I was there early cuz I had to
00:29:05
leave early oh that's right I remember can what are your hobbies I go to a lot of uh uh festivals lots of concerts
00:29:12
music music is okay what do you like what do you what kind of music do you like I love Miley Cyrus I love The Killers you know I love imagine
00:29:19
everything people don't like like you know what do mean who doesn't like Miley Cyrus who doesn't like the killers I
00:29:24
love Sam toown is one of my favorite albums of all time I love so Miley Cyrus The Killers Imagine Dragons who else uh
00:29:31
Nelly forado love I'm Like a Bird yeah like I I love like pop and like rock
00:29:36
music you know kind of like a bird I only fly away I don't have a sing I
00:29:42
don't know I come on SOL is homeless I don't know what kind of bird would you be if you were a bird bud I was scared
00:29:47
of birds actually my my my brother had a bird who was too friendly and he would what do you mean
00:29:55
too friendly I remember break in my box spring in half because the bird would
00:30:00
chase me and this is like probably when I was 24 um just a couple years ago yeah
00:30:06
like and then I just threw like a comforter at the bird it's just like but I didn't get it
00:30:13
what what kind of bird was it a street bird a street a street bird like a finchy a small the brown one the little
00:30:20
one the brown one you you little tiny one yeah like the the one you would see on the street so that little tiny guy
00:30:27
was chasing you around the [ __ ] apartment huh and you broke a spring ball yeah and you threw a comforter yeah
00:30:33
I was more 20 than 20 yeah wait a minute how did your you mean a pigeon is that what your no no it was like one of those
00:30:38
cute birds but it's just like do what birds do don't right why did your how did your brother have it in the home did
00:30:44
he get it from outside and brought it in it look look at some of these birds like that kind of like that yeah yeah but
00:30:50
like more more Brown more Brown now are you does that image make you scared when
00:30:56
you look at that does that look like that looks dangerous um it's it it's great when it's there
00:31:04
but if it was here it's too close too close oh it's too close all right put away the birds birds in the studio yeah
00:31:10
when's the last time you went to a zoo um last time I went to a zoo is probably because anthropology class made me and a
00:31:17
baboon started jerking off in front of me and I don't want to go back wait stop it was traumatic yeah I
00:31:25
wrote that in the anthropology paper too that the a baboom started jerking easily amused baboon I mean easily aroused
00:31:33
baboom was he staring at you when he was doing it it was anger in his eyes I'm
00:31:38
just like I'm writing this paper as quick as you're jerking you know just I got to get out of here so you haven't been there since high school no I was in
00:31:45
community college for eight and a half years I I liked it a
00:31:51
lot I loved you you didn't want to transfer no so many years so eight for
00:31:56
what community colle it Glendale Community colle it GCC baby yeah wow home of the fighting dragons I of the
00:32:04
fighting dragons what did you study at GCC uh mass communications but journalism and photography is what I was
00:32:11
you know journalism and photography and mass in mass communication umbrella in eight years of this and did you finish I
00:32:17
I couldn't finish just kidding I finished you finished yeah okay well what do you get when you finish I don't know uh I you get to wear a red dress
00:32:24
and and a tassel you get to have tassel but you haven't used the you got a degree right I wasn't going to go back
00:32:30
to school it was more of you know people I think you did a lot of school I wouldn't have to go after eight years
00:32:36
you could be a doctor I'm practically a doctor of what do you think you're a
00:32:41
doctor of you have a doctorate in what Ticket Master I think like I like you know I look at seating charts way too
00:32:47
much of your of what for shows everything yeah wow I love charts we got to get him a job at Live Nation or
00:32:54
something we could just following the blue dots that's no what I'm just saying don't you think you want to move on from
00:32:59
doing local comedy shows and move your way up I think you'd be a great promoter in in a bigger scale but I guess you
00:33:06
know honestly like you know I love The Comedy Store like I I don't it's always going to be there yeah what's your dream
00:33:12
Greg honestly it it just keeps changing like with with everyone that dies you
00:33:17
know but I don't know my dream I guess is so I don't tip over today but star R
00:33:24
survived and I'm going to survive and tell me what you think a dream of yours might be or like what is a goal in life
00:33:31
that you'd like to achieve it was getting back to The Comedy Store like well you're there baby so that's it you you're doing it you don't there's
00:33:37
nothing else that you feel like you kind of want a little bit in life oh like before it was doing comedy and and going
00:33:44
on the road I got to open for pully a few times which was really fun but then I just stopped and and um you know what
00:33:51
we got to have this guy he's got to open for us you got to do one of our shows yeah you got to do one of our shows you're coming to open open for us in
00:33:57
long I think in Long Beach you you're going to come down to Long Beach and open for us they don't have tickets anymore what do you mean we're sold out
00:34:03
yeah you have single Pizza no you're performing you're performing you mean the backstage you're not going to be in the audience no yes yeah no yes no
00:34:12
yes why why not you'll have to we would love it we would love it for us how
00:34:18
about this honestly anything for you Bobby I wouldn't I Bob Paul has asked me to do the podcast before and I said no
00:34:25
cuz I can't yeah but but but here's the deal you're going to how about come with us to Long Beach okay be backstage side
00:34:31
stage you'll be with Carlos and fancy and the crew if you decide at some point you'd be fond to go say hi he's not
00:34:38
going to do it we have to make him do it no you don't can't force him to do anything is if it's not too soon oh uh I
00:34:46
wouldn't need time why because I you know I'm more of like a Britney Spears
00:34:51
type performer where it's like robotic so you want do you want we can get pyro
00:34:56
and all sorts of [ __ ] for you do you want a snake up there knives let's get you a knife February 24th you're going
00:35:02
to be doing Long Beach with us you're going to at least come and hang out a month away it's a month away a month away yeah yeah well how about this we'll
00:35:07
get you Transportation down there we'll take care of you no I was going to come anyway and you have your own show horrible funny why don't you just put
00:35:12
yourself up there for five minutes yeah why not honestly like I would die though but because no you wouldn't I promise
00:35:18
you you won't die I promise you he could die give his family who's going to be on deck like you know it just like you know
00:35:24
it's always worried about oh are they going to be who's going to be on deck what if someone cancels last minute and all right okay but no but I I would I
00:35:30
honestly it would be an honor um I want to get some scoop on so you you you're promoter right and I'm sure there are
00:35:37
Comics that you book right that are nicer than others the goop scoop I want
00:35:42
the goop scoop we want the goop scoop baby right tile card up there you don't have to name names but let me ask you
00:35:47
let me ask you a question are there Comics Kinder than others absolutely okay are there Comics that you book
00:35:55
right that you don't really like that much uh that's not necessarily true
00:36:01
because like that's the problem like I had uh I I only book Comics I like oh
00:36:06
that's great oh that's good yeah because you always book arino yeah and you love him yeah he's great yeah yeah he kills
00:36:12
he kills yeah is there someone that you don't really like that's not that nice to you that you book and you can say it
00:36:18
and we'll we're going to blank it out and cut it out you're not gonna yeah say we are we look at me look at me look at me right now we would never I'm dead
00:36:25
serious we would never we'll do something we'll never going to [ __ ] you we would never do that that's insane we guested you on our you're on our show we
00:36:31
would never I I've never seen jzl neck on your shows I he has done okay well then he's Anthony gentl is one of my
00:36:38
favorite comics and actually he was supposed to do the the show that you did uh January 8th and act I was he asked to
00:36:45
do it and I said we already I've never seen Nicki Glazer on your shows Nikki Glazer has done the Nikki Glazer we need
00:36:52
we need to sign a petition to get Nikki Glazer back to the West Coast no she loves St Louis no okay well okay yeah I
00:36:59
I I love Nikki has Eliza done your shows yeah Eliza's a regular Nikki Nikki could
00:37:04
move back to the West Coast you've got a little bit of room in that place of yours I think right yeah we could house
00:37:09
yeah yeah you could house House com but is there but so who hasn't on your show and we be bleep it that you don't like
00:37:15
that much there's got to be cover your mouth when you do it and we'll bleep it we'll bleep it I promise we I swear no you know what what comic I don't like
00:37:22
yeah that hasn't done your show that has done it or hasn't done it that you don't that you're like G you're not going to bleep it I swear we
00:37:29
swear why would we [ __ ] you look at me that's my producer our produc right our producer we were not going to [ __ ] you I
00:37:34
pr stuff too yeah we won't [ __ ] you over cover your mouth if you say it I'm not a
00:37:40
big fan of yeah of course he's not going to do it anyway I know that's the only
00:37:45
one have you had no he won't resp he I had him when we were in the belly room but he's not responding you know as far
00:37:52
as you know you have his number no um all right say who's been the meanest to you who's been been the rudest or the
00:37:57
most disrespectful or just kind of not nice to you I guess you're going to bleep it we promise well uh uh I
00:38:05
guess has different it was hard to work with him yeah that's a bummer that's but
00:38:10
it's also not a surprise if he's on a little later than you know and even if it's natural causes uh and and he's
00:38:18
probably a type of guy that doesn't say hi to you and talk to you yeah I it was it was hard because like the first time
00:38:24
like the first time I and the only like time I really messed up was when I was working my job before I had before this
00:38:31
was a marketing operations project specialist too many words yeah it was used to be marketing production traffic
00:38:38
coordin it was so many words what was this for uh uh a health care company so
00:38:43
what were you doing for them traffic production project coordinator yeah but what are you doing we know the
00:38:50
title traffic production were you when you showed up and you clocked in what the [ __ ] did you do I get breakfast
00:38:59
okay Cafe downstairs all right right you did got breakfast for people how long no no no no for me and then I go back up
00:39:06
and then you know I I I worked on this uh project management tool system uh you
00:39:12
did you did programming I wouldn't say that cuz I can't do that so what did you it was like programming for dummies you
00:39:18
literally like instead of building something crazy you just click and drag and then all of a sudden the app has
00:39:23
that tool okay cool oh cool yeah so you yeah okay you were building so you're building something on on the
00:39:29
internet hey hey hey it's 2024 and let's talk about something important if you get injured by a person place or thing
00:39:36
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cell phone this a paid advertisement what would be your dream
00:40:43
job now if I said what is your dream job Greg are you doing it is it booking booking or not I love doing this
00:40:49
honestly I stopped dreaming but I maybe I have to start again you don't have to dream but I'm saying what would be a job that you go you know what would be
00:40:54
really fun to do I I would would enjoy blank a festival Booker like I love Festival L that's what we need to get
00:41:01
him to do Live Nation Coachella needs help like you know you'd be great at that Coachella needs help why you think
00:41:07
the lineups are not good oh my God I mean I'm looking for any excuse to go you know eat two Edibles and roll around
00:41:14
in the desert but like it's not happening okay let me let me I'll throw some names out and you see if you would
00:41:20
book it see if you would book it how about this Lana Del re great the last album was great this is a this is a she
00:41:26
headlining first night are you into it no because have you seen her perform is she a bad performer he's a bad performer
00:41:33
and he knows how about piece how about PES paluma paluma you know uh he he looks like more friendly and more
00:41:39
dangerous than Bad Bunny at the same time okay how about little little Uzi vert you like little Uzi I don't know that one yeah yeah okay let's say Andrew
00:41:46
and I were like we're we're managers we manage a bunch of bands and we're calling you m and you you're booking
00:41:52
Coachella uhhuh all right you get night two Greg who you got for us hey so no we're ping him oh hey goop we're manager
00:42:00
oh sorry about that hey goop it's us hey goop it's Santino and and Bob
00:42:05
what's happening hi WME or Uta no we're just Santino Le Santino Lee managera
00:42:12
hello hi yeah hey goop so we got some bands for you we're booking night two you're booking night two so can we throw
00:42:18
you some bands and you say yes or no so we got Lim limp the lipster Lim Lim
00:42:23
biscuit uh I I you can't do it like that because because because they're our
00:42:29
clients it's gonna hurt us right so you got to come up with some excuse uh we're and be smart about it I would contact
00:42:36
Carlos he's booking Sunday and he's doing lots of Throwbacks okay cool okay good by the way good deflection very
00:42:42
good because we can't take it on Saturday Okay so goop uh we've got uh a couple of throwback stuff but uh I guess
00:42:48
we'll give that to Carlos so so you only want new age stuff right now right uh no we got Adele oh Adele yes welcome you
00:42:56
like her oh you want aell yeah she headline oh she she could she could have the whole thing yeah she okay good we
00:43:03
don't manage her we don't anymore Dr we were just testing okay yeah we don't manage her we have Selena
00:43:09
Gomez she like to perform what do you think okay you're not into headliner or
00:43:14
probably second or what second oh second yeah second and the night or second to last no second to last and second to in
00:43:21
the lineup okay good that's two different things but trying to say to last in the night so call so let's put
00:43:29
her we got so we got Selena she's going to come sing wonderful um we've
00:43:34
got Neil Diamond yeah we don't know we got Neil Diamond he already has a show
00:43:47
America com to America you know no no your parents didn't then sing that when
00:43:52
they came over did you say parents twet car line I the Glee song that's leam
00:43:59
Michelle and she's welcome she's welcome all right so no denal no even Sunday yeah Carlos is
00:44:06
booking he got a [ __ ] up Carlos is a [ __ ] job give me your give me your ideal lineup at a festival yeah one
00:44:14
night just give me one night don't look at that that's don't look at that get that four four acts four acts
00:44:20
five opener go this is like so hard like I I I would
00:44:26
have to get back to no no no do it now you do it now Miley's definitely there or a Miley one we don't know yet the
00:44:33
arrangement but Miley no particular order Miley yeah and and the killers are a great Festival act so Killers Killers
00:44:41
yeah um [ __ ] I you know I uh [ __ ] uh I have
00:44:50
to have to who's on your Spotify playlist right now who's on your most listened no uh oh Kesha ket's a good
00:44:57
time okay KET three good yeah um I've been uh when you say good time though
00:45:03
what does that mean what does that mean just you know have a few drinks and you know so you'd like to have a few drinks
00:45:10
and you like to have a little bit of eddies do you do other ingestibles no because once I I have an addictive
00:45:16
personality obviously yeah so I have to have you done acid no Molly no Molly I would like like
00:45:26
I would love to but I I know that would be last person have you ok oh yeah you do yeah but I suck at it suck at it any
00:45:32
he nose beers oh uh no I thought I had something in my nose no I'm cocain
00:45:39
cocaine you have cocaine never done cocaine no yeah I'm open to it but I know that you're open to it I would your
00:45:45
heart would explode yeah I'm a doctor not good all right so
00:45:51
how about this this that that's your ultimate kind of lineup would be Miley Killers uh what did we
00:45:58
sayesha that's pretty that's a good little lineup you think you could uh facilitate a festival if you could reach
00:46:04
these people's managers you could get something together like you could be the new firefest I loved firefest did you go
00:46:10
to firefest I have an actual wristband from firefest an artist band so you went to firefest you got fed the baloney
00:46:16
sandwiches and all that stuff no I was a fan afterwards so I bought all the merch merchandise that like were in crates in
00:46:22
the ocean and like I bought a artist wristband and we do the go ear we come
00:46:28
up with a complete thing the goop Fest I think we should do goop we don't do a [ __ ] Island where do we do it on huh
00:46:34
we don't do it on an island no no no like a toll or um a peninsula we'll do it in a peninsula or an is the Peninsula
00:46:40
hotel is nice what we're not going to do it at the hotel yeah what hotel the P pinula talking yeah yeah yeah a mountain
00:46:46
top they do they do one on a mountain top we should Kanye already did that all right so where we do the goop Fest where
00:46:52
does goop Fest take place Antarctica Fredo's Factory no okay at
00:46:57
the chippy Factory at the chippy Factory okay good so we'll get we'll get a hold of Fredo guys reach out to Fredo see if
00:47:03
we can do the goop Fest at presented by freay follow up with Andreas with Carlos Carlos Carlos is going to be doing that
00:47:09
so we're going to be at the fre delay Factory where is what town is that in it's in Perry plant Georgia yeah so if
00:47:15
you live anywhere near there just know goop Fest is coming to you in the next couple of years at the Fredo Perry plant
00:47:21
Factory now let's get images of what this is going to look like cuz we just want to map it out a little bit no just go to images baby boy yeah let's
00:47:28
go to images baby boy let's see what they look like let's see what there so this is beautiful that's where goop Fest
00:47:33
is going to be yeah it seems so hot that's no different oh yeah Georgia is hot look at that yeah but we'll do it in
00:47:39
the win win we'll do it in the fall oh we can't do it in Georgia because they allow guns we can't that's whoa wait
00:47:45
stop yeah that's they St wait wa wait wait stop what's up with guns they allow them in Georgian festivals I know but
00:47:51
you don't like them it's so scary guns you press the button but and you kind of
00:47:57
get you've never held one trick I used a one of those things that cut wood ones and I like shook hold on hold a cut wood
00:48:05
gun no I guess two different things uh anything with power scares me like a power tool you're yeah I used a table
00:48:12
slicer oh man table saw yeah I think my I my home my my my teacher was like
00:48:17
let's get him away from this he's going to cry so you don't like things that cause harm I don't like things that cause harm but also things that like
00:48:24
Shake is that shake yeah or vibrate what does that mean what do you I mean it was just you know you don't like any sort of
00:48:31
vibration or shaking yeah I I yeah it just you don't have tools at home no I have a brother
00:48:39
who has he's a tool oh no he has tool he has tools got it interesting wow so at
00:48:45
night when you go to sleep what time are you going to bed I go to bed at like 8 and then I wake up at like 11:00 and
00:48:52
then I eat melatonin gummies and then I go to sleep for another hour and then I wake up again you have sleep apnea I is
00:49:01
that when you like make weird noises yeah sure it's when you can't really breathe in your sleep no I'm good at
00:49:07
that like but I'm not good at like staying asleep but it's potentially serious though sleep apne what do you
00:49:12
think we could get you a machine can the bad friends buy you a machine and maybe get you through the night I want to get you through the night we need you need
00:49:17
one of those no that's the Batman movie one that's not Bane no you do know that
00:49:23
if you don't get any good sleep at all it has it neurodegenerative properties you could start losing your mind if you don't get any sleep I get too excited to
00:49:30
sleep sometimes but we got to get you to sleep dude you're sleeping three hours a night that's [ __ ] terrible that's all
00:49:35
you sleep is three hours some days it's better like I just like there's so many dogs on Tik Tok that need watching yeah
00:49:42
I agree with that yeah we need to take you to Tulum over the summer yeah we need to go on a beach no I did that no
00:49:49
you haven't not with us I did I went I I spent 10 nights in Cancun and it felt like I died and I was in purgatory I
00:49:55
know but my point is not with us that Cancun's not [ __ ] Tulum I need entertainment but I guess you're the no
00:50:00
we're the Entertainer so when you go on vacation you went solo I always go solo it's not always like have you ever been
00:50:07
on vacation with with with family or friends or anybody well last uh I don't like yes uh yes my idea of a vacation is
00:50:16
I book like you know 9 to 12 nights in in New York City and then I see like 16
00:50:23
to 18 shows oh you're one of those to a show a night sometimes four solo yeah you've seen Wicked 24 times and I
00:50:31
stopped counting 24 times you seen wi wow yeah Book of Mormon I love Book of
00:50:36
Mormon how many times have you seen it I've seen it you know over 10 times but also the best part about Book of Mormon
00:50:41
is watching the audience watch Book of Mormon god dude I I got to tell have you
00:50:47
it's [ __ ] incredible first of all Book of Mormon yes it's amazing second second to this I saw Lion King you're
00:50:52
the most interesting [ __ ] I've ever met in my entire life no yeah dude I've have 24 times a wicked you can keep
00:50:58
going yeah but you don't understand that's W that's that's I mean you must you're in love with it no it'ses you
00:51:04
sing you probably sing with the do you sing along sing along I'm an emotional person and like sometimes you could hear the emotion in these women's voices and
00:51:12
they all have different riffs yeah so I follow the riffs I see you are you love
00:51:17
perform you truly love performance yeah that's why you're saying about musicians that you don't like is because they put on a bad show yeah yeah yeah yeah you
00:51:25
don't you don't have any patience if they kind of mail it in quote unquote you like a tight show I love a tight set
00:51:31
list yes yeah a set list is like so important right so what have you seen the most on Broadway Wicked uh Pro I see
00:51:41
a lot a lot like some of my oh I was really into the one that was out uh
00:51:46
about the Filipino dictator here lies love how many times you see that that
00:51:51
one I I flew uh back Thanksgiving weekend because it was closing so i i before I buried my father I had to go
00:51:57
bury the show cuz and say goodbye to that as well right but the whole venue is like a little nightclub you know you
00:52:04
take your candies and then you know you you know and you have they don't let you have drinks because you could spill yeah
00:52:11
but like the whole place is like a dance floor and like different VIP sections and the show happens all over it's about
00:52:17
ailda Marcos yeah we know it was so awesome it's one of those shows where you're sitting there and and there
00:52:23
actors on the all around around yeah wow yeah it's interactive if you well The Lion King I
00:52:30
did well yeah there's a giraffe that walked there a giraff I did that like a wedding you scared the [ __ ] out of me
00:52:36
dude there's a yeah there was a company called sleep no more do you know sleep no more yeah so have you seen asleep no
00:52:43
more I've been there which one have you seen which one they I've seen I love the MRI cotel they put on that I see I'll
00:52:49
I'll see anything do you know what this is no sleep no more is incredible it's a theater company that basically puts on live interactive you are a part no no
00:52:56
they're not all the same there's a bunch of different stories you wear Mas you wear the mask as a as a as a viewer and you literally walk around from room to
00:53:02
room while the play goes on in front of you we went in London we went to see one called the drowned man did you ever see drowned man I didn't see the drown man
00:53:08
oh my [ __ ] god dude you literally move through a factory in London it was in in shortage I think it was New York
00:53:14
has it permanently New York has it permanently now you go it's in New York sleep no more has and you go floor to
00:53:19
floor Bob and you pick up the play in pieces where it's happening like this are people are viewing the play while
00:53:25
it's taking place they could move they could leave the scene whenever they want go to another scene you don't have to stay in one spot wow it's but how do you
00:53:32
follow along you can follow one actor you can follow a group you but if I want to see the whole movie what happens you stay for an hour or two and you get you
00:53:39
start to you might get the end of the [ __ ] show in the beginning every time you go you'll see something different
00:53:44
pretty rarely because there is no beginning and end quote unquote it's a big loop so you don't really know what part of the loop you're in the story is
00:53:51
continually uh uh uh growing and changing so you could hypothetically start in the middle and and the second
00:53:57
middle could be the end to you wow it's closing it's they keep extending it but it's closing now March 31st I'm going to
00:54:03
see it the last Thursday of March I highly recommend in La you mean no in New York I'm planning my next New York
00:54:08
trip it's one of the greatest things I think I've ever seen live I'm going to watch it in my life and also can we go together or yeah I would love to go with
00:54:14
you oh they separate people though and funny they do if you if you they open an elevator door they let someone walk out
00:54:20
then they close the elevator door so if you if you and I go like I went with my wife if they separated on purpose they
00:54:25
don't want they usually want you to be alone and you can get touched and kissed and hugged and pulled into room did you
00:54:31
get touched uh I I've gone like a lot of times and like you know sometimes they just drag you and then sometimes they
00:54:36
just like do some weird stuff you know I've Been Kissed yeah I got kissed on your M well she kiss she moved my mask
00:54:42
and she like kissed my cheek and then kissed right by my lips she must have known did you get did you get hard huh a
00:54:48
little hard you get a little hard did I did I get a little hard Greg as long as it doesn't last more than 24 hours it's
00:54:54
good have you had a boner for 24 hours one time no but if I do I know what to do
00:55:01
what do you do what you do I think then I have to go to the wake up or I'm going to call 911 or go to sleep or I'm going
00:55:06
to call 911 that's right go to sleep or I'm calling 911 wow so you've had a house full of of unfortunate death and
00:55:13
you're you're you're now making your way into the world as a single man who's
00:55:20
owning his own business so you you've succeeded tremendously cu the show is extremely successful
00:55:25
you get awesome Comics it's always sold out so you've achieved a lot amongst heartbreak he pays the most he pays good
00:55:33
money for the yes he's Fair he's Fair he's fair and true and just but you get
00:55:39
a nice chunk huh yeah that's how I have to pay for Adele Adele wants needs a lot
00:55:44
of money so how much money do you think you spend a month on shows is it all your checks I'm smart with my money but
00:55:51
the thing is I after every horribly funny I go and and I don't come back back until the next horribly funny
00:55:56
usually where would you go to New York like see my next thing I I was just in um Las Vegas for New Year's and um I saw
00:56:05
uh post Malone Christina Aguilera Demi Lavado and bunch of bangers Kelly
00:56:10
Clarkson in one show no four different shows and sometimes like you know you just have to like leave and go to the
00:56:15
next one a little early but um after this horribly funny I'm going to Las Vegas again I'm not a big fan of his but
00:56:22
like you know at this point I'll see any in with that within reason but I'm going to see Bruno Mars uh Adele um there has
00:56:31
to be other people Usher is in Vegas have you seen Usher I haven't seen Usher you have no no you don't BR Mar is a
00:56:36
great Entertainer yeah he he is a he is a great Entertainer yeah um but but yeah
00:56:41
just uh so every dime you make goes to live entertainment it goes right back into entertainment and and I love festivals I love VIP experiences at
00:56:48
festivals like treat me well in a parking lot you know that's that's what
00:56:53
you know I don't even understand what that mean cuz like all these festivals are like basically in a parking lot and they like charge thousands of dollars
00:57:00
dude imagine him when he in Woodstock when went wrong I would be calling my mom I know
00:57:06
there's no water no water right you're trapped people get trampled to death I actually had friends call and ask if I
00:57:12
was at fire Festival like because really yeah uh but no I wasn't like the lineup wasn't good or I would have been okay
00:57:19
here you go you're at you're at firefest okay you're trapped no it is kind of a deserted island
00:57:26
what is your final meal going to be if they say Greg we're going to have to we don't we can't get you out of here we're going to give you your final meal what's
00:57:32
your final meal I thought about it I like even if I knew I was going to die I wouldn't go back to eating meat just
00:57:38
because out of being kind that's your moral that's your but it's like also it's not religious so it's not weird but
00:57:43
like Miley Cyrus is kind of has been a like is kind of like a a religion she's the [ __ ] best so tell me what your
00:57:50
final meal would be um probably all the chips uh what what do we talk what kind
00:57:55
what flavors like what's your what's your I love barbecue I love all the Doritos families really yeah are we
00:58:01
talking spicy nacho spicy spicy nacho yeah and then the half the fun is you know afterwards when you're getting it
00:58:08
off your fingers and then you fall asleep so when you look your fingers is your favorite so your last meal would just be chips you like do you like the
00:58:14
Mexican ones where this say lemon lemon uh you know what oh those what are they called Takis I don't know Tak most of
00:58:21
them are stale like you know I try I like them they're hard to find I don't go grocery shopping outside like I don't
00:58:27
do anything you know I just get everything delivered but like they rarely have them and they finally have them and it was stale and then I got
00:58:34
them once in Las Vegas and it was stale there too where do you stay in Las Vegas I like to stay somewhere different every
00:58:41
night and like wait a minute wait a minute if you're there for how many days three four days last time I was supposed
00:58:46
to be there for seven nights but one of the nights I decided to book a a two-floor suite and then I forgot how
00:58:54
much money are you making and and then I and I kind of fell down a spiral staircase but it was glamorous like you
00:59:00
know and then I was just sitting down going looking up I'm like it's funny to have a two-floor suite and not be able
00:59:06
to go upstairs sure wow so you change hotels every night yeah why why why would you do that to yourself I because
00:59:12
I'm a very uh a person who uh uh I guess what's that word it's nomadic Restless
00:59:20
Restless uh I guess close but no it's it's like when um nostalgic and I have different memories
00:59:27
in different places and you know it's a good way to like you know experience different things and it's also a way to
00:59:33
get yourself back into a different a place you were in a different time in your life nostalgic yeah we are how many real
00:59:41
quick how many horribly funnies do you do a month two only two a month yeah only two shows two shows there were some
00:59:47
months where uh they were trying to get me to double up you don't double up and and I did some some months worked and
00:59:53
sometimes it doesn't but like a 10:30 p.m. show on a Monday right cuz I'm trying to do the math you know okay I
01:00:01
charge more than other promoters I know but I'm just seeing how much you make so I get yeah so that's yeah that's a lot
01:00:06
yeah yeah yeah but but yeah it goes It goes back to the community just yeah yeah yeah entertainment entertainment
01:00:11
that's great live entertainment yeah what part of the city do you live in Los Bell sorry Los B yes Los oh Los F Los I
01:00:21
really didn't know what you're were saying oh lost bellies yeah yeah uh not fies no that's no say say Los FES Los
01:00:29
Los FES I can't losis losis losis I went to Los bil elementary school but it's
01:00:34
always been Los wait you're from there I well I that's I was bullied there from
01:00:40
you were bullied there yeah who bullied you there everywhere in Armenian school was the worst well let me tell you something all these [ __ ] that
01:00:47
bullied you all these [ __ ] pieces of [ __ ] that thought they were better than you where are they and look at you now
01:00:52
successful business owner he must been the cutest kid imaginable actually I I'll show you I'll send you a picture
01:00:58
there's a picture of me like kind of dressed the same with a microphone like kind of the same as I would do like you
01:01:04
know a few drinks in just singing um but but I I'll send you a picture for fun so
01:01:09
you're telling me you went to um Elementary School there then where was high school John Marshall High School
01:01:15
John Marshall right on yeah and I was not in the yearbook and I didn't go to prom because AAL LaVine had concerts
01:01:21
wellow that's a good reason skip oh so you've always been like this yeah wow what's the first show you've ever seen
01:01:27
Greg so I had my first big show like was Wango Tango but my first solo artist was
01:01:34
Nelly Fado at the wilter theater wow the bur in the spot cosic it was the there
01:01:39
were bubbles too there was or yeah yeah there were bubbles you love Bubbles I
01:01:45
love I love I can tell I love like lots of Lights light show big I don't like EDF you take bubble baths no I don't
01:01:53
it's hard to get this in about in and out of things oh you take showers then yeah okay what do you mean it's hard to
01:01:59
get this in and out of things it it's a lot like you know like literally this chair deserves an award
01:02:06
like bubbles are supposed legs if you guys are I want to go you might be sitting go Spa with you would you go to
01:02:11
a spa with me no Korean spa yes no why I
01:02:17
dude I'm not going to look at your dick I know what wait wait no won't look at your day
01:02:25
okay okay but can we go to Wiis Spa I after horribly funny you and I will get
01:02:30
in my car we go to Wiis Spa we go to the S with my t-shirt on like no no you can
01:02:36
keep your t-shirt on you can keep whatever no when we get yes he can he can keep whatever he [ __ ] when we go you got to get naked put your [ __ ] in
01:02:42
the [ __ ] locker and then you can put it on he doesn't want to get naked he sounds like the bullying just kidding
01:02:48
you think I'm being no not you not you yeah it just you can look at mine okay I
01:02:53
guarantee you your yours is bigger than Bobby's hey let's what what what am I out of
01:03:00
bounds we we can do a comparison it's something to
01:03:05
consider good good job consider let's that we'll consider going to the spot
01:03:10
but how then we go upstairs and we'll do the [ __ ] clay room clay room clay room yeah we lay in the clay right and
01:03:16
we'll have we'll be fully clothed and we can reminisce don't you want to reminisce with me I like reminiscing can
01:03:23
we do this like somewhere else yeah yeah yeah we can do wherever you want okay where's your favorite restaurant to go to could we take you
01:03:28
out for a nice dinner I need to take you guys out to a nice dinner no no no where would you like us to take you we can go
01:03:34
to hope hope have you been to hope I haven't been to Hope but that's a Street in downtown right yeah yeah I mean
01:03:39
there's a restaurant write that it's called h o
01:03:46
IHOP I'm it's yeah right there're healthy organic positive eating oh that
01:03:51
sounds like it's a vegetarian place and I heard is great do you eat at vegetarian restaurants no I wouldn't eat
01:03:58
at a vegan restaurant which is crazy like even though like you know I don't have much options to begin with but um
01:04:04
you know uh yeah yeah we'll get you out to somewhere special now seriously I
01:04:11
need to take you guys out no but if if you guys are down February 5th it's uh
01:04:16
Eliza Margaret Cho Esther Rick Glassman can't have two Margaret shows on One
01:04:21
show yeah it's too hard to no no yeah one at a time that's what they say Margaret dude Margaret the
01:04:28
other night she's the [ __ ] best I love her but she had her dog right and she goes hold this when I go on stage
01:04:35
and so I'm literally you know what I mean sitting there with the dog and it it was trembling it's the sweetest dog I
01:04:41
know but it doesn't know me yeah but it also was a little scared it it does Li sick and she did extra time I felt like
01:04:47
so I was holding this dog and I didn't want any cuz other people walked up to me and went you want me to hold it I go
01:04:52
I can it's Mar dog she asked me what time was it that's how I too I I protect that dog with my life when she's on I
01:04:59
know me too do you hold it you know I I I I at first yeah but if it's not on going anywhere I like you know I'm just
01:05:05
like you know more like playing what's it name uh L Luc it's someone you could
01:05:12
say it Lucia Lu Luchia Luchia yeah that one that's what Luchia I said it over
01:05:18
here oh you did it but then she but then Luchia turned to me and kind of looked at my face and it went like Mom like she
01:05:26
thought I was and then I kissed her in the mouth
01:05:31
the and then the dog thought I was Margaret well the same face same face yeah yeah yeah so okay so Greg um it's
01:05:39
been more than a pleasure to have you on the show no thank you I mean it you're would you do it again yeah we'd like to
01:05:45
have you back would you do it again I think the fans are going to love you you're such a lovable human being but but next time you know this this was
01:05:52
your introduct introduction introduction the next time we you won't talk so much
01:05:58
we'll just be a sidekick but with jesssie what Jesse does right so you could just interject well sometimes
01:06:04
throw it to you so it wouldn't be as much pressure okay right did just feel like a lot of pressure I it was actually
01:06:11
pretty awesome it was awesome yeah yeah but I was so nervous but did we make you feel comfortable absolutely wonderful we
01:06:17
thought you did great yeah I think you know the old me would have really like
01:06:22
you know been more yeah I'm glad we got you so uh why don't you sign off to the fans uh there in your camera go ahead
01:06:29
and tell them tell them tell them what tell say what you need to say oh no um this one right here oh thank you for
01:06:36
being a bad friend yeah yeah that's great yeah thank you for being a bad friend that's great
01:06:42
do it again thank you for being a bad friend oh I think I did too many a it's fine f
01:06:49
thank you for being a bad
01:06:55
I think he killed his family you think he killed his family he said he doesn't like I I didn't want to ask him because
01:07:01
I didn't want to have to have a heart attack but he said that he doesn't like anyone breathing in his
01:07:06
house he has he likes to be alone in a in a imagine he was holding his aunt and
01:07:12
he was like yeah hey Auntie it's crazy yeah it's crazy died
01:07:18
in his arms in his arms that's awful it's and you know what dude that's awful what are you laughing at death
01:07:24
yeah Carlos you're a piece of [ __ ] man bro Carlos are you still sober right now yes I am how's it been going 10 days wow
01:07:31
10 days clean right now yeah you look great you look brigh eyed thank you I appreciate that you look you look uh you
01:07:37
look prepared to take on this trip that we're taking this week oh yeah yeah oh you're going yeah I'm
01:07:42
going no and I'm not drinking I have no plans to drink but you are coming yeah it's going to be great you were super
01:07:47
nice to my friends the other night which ones oh my the friends the females the crew that you had yeah they were such
01:07:54
big fans and they were so nervous to meet you well they were so nice yeah yeah and then they were like you were so kind well my pleasure always you're
01:08:01
you're storming around the the castle of The Comedy Store looking like a king there you had a Herm of women just
01:08:07
friends yeah but it was a herum of of of young women friends meanwhile the rest of the people 30 something come on young
01:08:14
ladies I'm not saying it inappropriately I'm saying they're young ladies 307 I'll make it weird yeah why
01:08:20
did you make it weird I I'm not making it weird I love that show 30 not a one of them was 30 they were
01:08:27
all 27 so why are you making it worse by the way when Greg kept saying 27 yeah
01:08:33
what are we talking my guess 30 something he could be 60 I don't know I
01:08:38
have noidea I mean I I I think he's in his late 30s mid-30s I think I think 35 34 33 and I didn't want to also you know
01:08:45
cuz he you know and I I don't want to push it right but it's like when I told
01:08:51
Andrew a couple of weeks ago that Greg Craig Greg or GRE it's Greg Greg g
01:08:58
r a i g yeah Greg Greg Greg you told me his name was Craig I've been calling him
01:09:04
Craig no it's Greg Greg G yeah and you no but he told
01:09:11
[Music]
01:09:21
us wo
01:09:29
yeah
