00:00:00
Your hair looks fantastic.
00:00:01
>> Thank you. I have a new name though. Can
00:00:02
I Hey, how you doing?
00:00:04
>> I'm Andrew Rice Clay.
00:00:06
>> That's really good.
00:00:08
>> Andrew Rice Clay.
00:00:09
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:00:09
>> So good.
00:00:10
>> Thank you. Um, so I, you know, as we as
00:00:14
you know,
00:00:14
>> hey, I'm Sebastian Manvitzv.
00:00:22
>> All right, let's get off of our
00:00:24
impressions.
00:00:24
>> Can we open that with that?
00:00:25
>> 100%.
00:00:26
>> You two are bad friends.
00:00:28
>> Who are these two idiots? a white dude
00:00:31
and an Asian dude. You two are
00:00:33
disgusting.
00:00:35
>> You two are something.
00:00:36
>> We're bad friends.
00:00:39
>> Um, so you know, I have a bunch of
00:00:41
Filipinos living my house.
00:00:42
>> Too many. Some would argue that you're
00:00:44
at the limit.
00:00:45
>> You know, like with animals, you know
00:00:46
how you can only have a certain animals
00:00:48
in your house? How many Philip
00:00:50
>> Careful now? I don't think animals and
00:00:52
Filipinos should be
00:00:53
>> They're not even the same thing cuz
00:00:54
Filipinos are humans.
00:00:55
>> But you're making the comparison to how
00:00:56
having animals is the same as having
00:00:57
Filipino.
00:00:57
>> Well, just anybody, I guess. What's the
00:00:59
law for how many animals you're allowed
00:01:00
to have in your house at one time
00:01:01
>> in California?
00:01:02
>> In California?
00:01:03
>> I think it's five.
00:01:04
>> I think five of each breed.
00:01:05
>> No, just five.
00:01:07
>> Five animals? Yeah. There's no way.
00:01:08
>> You think it's higher?
00:01:09
>> I bet it's like five cats, five. I bet
00:01:11
it's like
00:01:11
>> No,
00:01:11
>> I bet there might not be a restrictive
00:01:13
number.
00:01:13
>> There is a restrictive.
00:01:14
>> Total pet limits in some areas like Long
00:01:16
Beach resident restricted to total of
00:01:17
four four weaned pets. So, they must be
00:01:21
sped or
00:01:21
>> neuter. And I have a business where I
00:01:23
wean them.
00:01:23
>> Look at this. Three or four dogs or cats
00:01:25
combined without a special kennel
00:01:26
permit. It limits vary wildly by
00:01:29
municipality.
00:01:30
>> Yeah.
00:01:30
>> You know who your next door neighbor is?
00:01:32
>> Um
00:01:32
>> met him in Memphis at the Elvis at the
00:01:34
one of our worst performances ever.
00:01:36
>> Southern
00:01:36
>> Oh, I know Spence Spencer Presley.
00:01:39
>> Clay Spencer Presley.
00:01:40
>> Spencer Sutherland. I ran into him last
00:01:42
night.
00:01:42
>> Oh, I know Spencer Sutherland. Yeah, I
00:01:43
love sexy dude.
00:01:44
>> Sexy dude.
00:01:45
>> Sexy dude.
00:01:46
>> Sex.
00:01:46
>> And he told me what street he lives on
00:01:48
and I go, "What? Bobby lives there." And
00:01:50
he goes, "Where?" We bring up the You're
00:01:53
literally three doors down from this kid
00:01:54
>> from I've never seen him. He live he he
00:01:56
goes I
00:01:57
>> No, no, no. I dude. No, no, no, no, no,
00:01:59
no, no, no. I I know where he lives.
00:02:01
>> Do you know how I know?
00:02:02
>> It's on your block.
00:02:03
>> No, no, that's not it.
00:02:05
>> I just told you.
00:02:07
>> That No.
00:02:08
>> Oh, for two.
00:02:09
>> You're for two. Give me another guess.
00:02:10
>> Maybe because you saw him one time
00:02:12
driving. No.
00:02:12
>> Okay. For three. I struck.
00:02:14
>> There's this one house two or three
00:02:16
doors down, right? But he they played
00:02:19
too loud the music.
00:02:20
>> You think it's him?
00:02:21
>> Well, it's You can tell it's live music.
00:02:24
>> Oh, right.
00:02:24
>> Right.
00:02:26
That's that's his song.
00:02:27
>> YEAH.
00:02:28
>> SPENCER Presley
00:02:31
Southern Southern whatever. All right.
00:02:34
So I have um I won't even bring
00:02:36
Filipino. I have three people living in
00:02:38
my house
00:02:39
>> who are Filipino
00:02:40
>> who happen to be Filipino.
00:02:41
>> Not happen. They are
00:02:42
>> and they are my family.
00:02:43
>> Not blood but yeah.
00:02:44
>> No Jules and um
00:02:46
>> what's their names?
00:02:49
>> Issa and Honey are my Honey is the mom
00:02:51
and I have the two daughters and they're
00:02:52
like family.
00:02:53
>> We love them like family. So, Issa,
00:02:55
right, the youngest, she lives in the
00:02:56
Philippines, right? What are you looking
00:02:59
at?
00:03:00
>> Huh?
00:03:01
>> What are you looking at?
00:03:02
>> I was just doing a thing because you
00:03:03
always look at them. So, I'm looking
00:03:05
away to see if maybe it affects the way
00:03:08
that you when you talk and tell a story
00:03:10
cuz you always look away when I talk at
00:03:12
them. So, I'm I'm going to start looking
00:03:13
over here to see if that is the same
00:03:15
balance. I noticed that.
00:03:16
>> I was talking to you guys. Is that what
00:03:18
you mean?
00:03:19
>> Yes.
00:03:19
>> Yeah. You often you will always look to
00:03:20
your right
00:03:21
>> all every episode.
00:03:22
>> Every episode. All All the whole
00:03:23
episode. So, I'm going to start going
00:03:24
over.
00:03:24
>> No, no, you know what I'm going to do?
00:03:26
I'm going to turn this way.
00:03:26
>> Well, don't you think that we we do,
00:03:28
right?
00:03:28
>> You know, but what I'm saying But what
00:03:31
I'm saying is is that um I didn't real I
00:03:34
didn't really even realize that I did
00:03:35
that.
00:03:35
>> I don't really I don't know that you do
00:03:37
that either. That's something I'm not Do
00:03:38
you guys notice that?
00:03:39
>> Yeah, but the thing is is um there's
00:03:40
three guys back there.
00:03:41
>> Can I get a window with guys over here?
00:03:43
>> I I I understand what you're doing,
00:03:45
dude. But it's like, you know what I
00:03:46
mean? I want to have peaceful conf uh
00:03:49
relationship with you.
00:03:50
>> It's very You and I are very peaceful.
00:03:52
>> Right. So it's like sometimes when I
00:03:53
feel conflict I go there.
00:03:54
>> Well, can we take a moment of peace?
00:03:56
>> No, I want to finish my story.
00:03:57
>> Oh, sorry.
00:03:58
>> Okay, let's take a moment of peace.
00:04:01
>> Okay, so let me finish. Yeah. Okay. Um,
00:04:04
so Issa lives in the Philippines and um,
00:04:07
>> you know, she hasn't seen any real movie
00:04:10
like the movies that she's exp.
00:04:16
>> It's making the boys laugh.
00:04:23
I think you're right. I I I I tend to
00:04:26
look at them and I will look at you from
00:04:27
now on.
00:04:27
>> I'm your partner.
00:04:29
>> Okay. I've just been hanging out with
00:04:31
you every single day for a very long
00:04:32
time.
00:04:34
>> Sorry.
00:04:34
>> Like from you I mean early morning to
00:04:36
night. I realize I apologize. So it's
00:04:38
like
00:04:38
>> look at the boys.
00:04:39
>> Sometimes you know I bet you you turn
00:04:41
away from your wife sometimes
00:04:43
>> and talk to three boys.
00:04:45
>> We don't. Yeah. The three boys that live
00:04:46
in my house.
00:04:48
Don't you have three boys in a cubicle?
00:04:50
>> Yeah.
00:04:50
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, anyway, um
00:04:51
>> Well, men, they're three beautiful men.
00:04:53
>> Yeah, men.
00:04:54
>> So, finish it.
00:04:55
>> I will. So, she's never seen like, you
00:04:57
know, Avengers obviously mean because,
00:04:59
you know, she's 18 years old and also um
00:05:02
things of this nature.
00:05:04
>> So, what I've been doing at night is
00:05:06
trying to, you know, I mean, expose them
00:05:07
to, you know, I mean, movies that I
00:05:10
think that are ne necessary to watch.
00:05:12
>> You told uh um Exorcist, you showed
00:05:14
them.
00:05:14
>> So, I showed them Exorcist. Exorcist
00:05:16
doesn't have the impact that it once was
00:05:18
because every horror movie movie steals
00:05:20
from it and it's like
00:05:22
>> well gore is so different today.
00:05:23
>> Yeah.
00:05:24
>> Like Grand Theft Auto has more violent
00:05:26
gore than Exor,
00:05:27
>> right? But it was interesting to see.
00:05:29
I've seen it a thousand times. So it's
00:05:31
like the kind of special effects they
00:05:33
were able to do at that time.
00:05:34
>> It's impressive.
00:05:35
>> They liked it. It was okay. But so last
00:05:38
night we did a double banger.
00:05:39
>> Oh [ __ ] What' you do?
00:05:40
>> We did I I was just scrolling down. They
00:05:42
had never even heard of Mad Max Fury
00:05:44
Road.
00:05:45
>> Really? That's not even that old.
00:05:47
>> I know.
00:05:47
>> How many years is that? Wasn't that like
00:05:48
>> That's 2014.
00:05:49
>> Yeah. 104 years ago. Yeah.
00:05:50
>> And then obviously we saw that they're
00:05:52
like, "Oh, we don't believe it.
00:05:55
>> We don't believe it. This is very good."
00:05:56
You know what I mean? You know what I
00:05:58
mean? Give me more. Give me more. Right.
00:06:00
More. So then we did Fury also. Not as
00:06:03
good, but very good.
00:06:04
>> Yeah.
00:06:05
>> Okay. Um over the last couple years
00:06:08
we've we've I've tried to do um Coen
00:06:10
Brothers. Oh, my favorite.
00:06:12
>> I know. So, I've showed them raising
00:06:14
raising Arizona, right? I've showed them
00:06:16
>> No Country.
00:06:17
>> No Country for Old Men, Fargo,
00:06:20
>> right?
00:06:22
>> What?
00:06:22
>> Labowski.
00:06:23
>> Labowski. Big Labowski.
00:06:24
>> I can't do it.
00:06:25
>> They won't
00:06:25
>> cuz I pre-watched it to even have them
00:06:28
watch it
00:06:29
>> cuz I know there's What?
00:06:30
>> They're not going to like it.
00:06:31
>> I don't think they're going to like it.
00:06:33
>> It is. It is really kind of subversive
00:06:35
and weird. It's so weird out there and
00:06:37
>> Yeah, it's out there.
00:06:38
>> Although it's a great story.
00:06:39
>> Yeah, it is. Right. So, but you have to
00:06:42
understand they're a How do I say this?
00:06:45
It's almost as if they've landed here
00:06:47
from a different
00:06:48
>> It's almost like they're from the
00:06:49
Philippines.
00:06:51
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's almost like
00:06:53
>> It's almost like they came from another
00:06:54
country,
00:06:54
>> right? So, now I'm trying to look for
00:06:57
evergreen movies.
00:06:58
>> Oh, interesting. So, let's the fans
00:07:00
start submitting.
00:07:01
>> So, I No. So, I made a list.
00:07:02
>> Oh, you got it. my list and most of them
00:07:05
they haven't seen
00:07:06
>> and I would like to add to the list if I
00:07:08
may of movies that should be now you
00:07:10
have to understand they don't do slowb
00:07:12
burn
00:07:13
>> it's got to be quick fast hot action
00:07:15
>> that's why I'm scared of the godfather
00:07:17
>> because it's very slow burn
00:07:18
>> they will hate that movie
00:07:20
>> I think so
00:07:20
>> they'll hate that my money's on hate in
00:07:22
fact we should take a poll
00:07:23
>> but Jules but Jules and honey the mom
00:07:26
saw Taxi Driver and they liked it
00:07:28
>> well that is a pretty intense film
00:07:30
>> okay
00:07:31
>> right I think I think I think even the
00:07:32
slow moments are building up to
00:07:33
something very heavy.
00:07:34
>> Yeah.
00:07:35
>> Right. So, how about Dog Day Afternoon?
00:07:37
>> So, good.
00:07:38
>> I don't think they're going to like it.
00:07:40
>> I'll just give you my list.
00:07:41
>> But that's a pretty
00:07:42
>> It starts immediately.
00:07:43
>> It's funny as [ __ ]
00:07:44
>> It's funny as [ __ ] So, let me let me
00:07:46
just start with my list.
00:07:47
>> Yep.
00:07:48
>> They've never even heard of Apollo 13,
00:07:54
>> dude. So funny.
00:07:56
>> Great movie, right? Don't you think if I
00:07:58
I framed it like this, this really
00:08:00
happened? Independence Day.
00:08:04
>> Maybe Independence Day.
00:08:05
>> I think they would love Independence
00:08:06
Day.
00:08:06
>> I think they've seen it.
00:08:07
>> Doesn't everybody like that movie?
00:08:08
>> So then here's my next one. Eternal the
00:08:10
sunshine. So
00:08:12
>> that's so weird. They're never going to
00:08:13
like I love that movie.
00:08:14
>> Magnolia.
00:08:15
>> They're going to hate that movie.
00:08:17
>> Okay. But they saw um what PTS did they
00:08:19
see? They saw Oh, none. Although they
00:08:22
saw one um a day one fight after what?
00:08:24
One battle after another and they loved
00:08:26
it.
00:08:27
>> Interesting.
00:08:27
>> They loved one battle. But but but do
00:08:29
they love that because of Leo?
00:08:32
>> This is the thing. Can you show them a
00:08:33
movie without a star that they're
00:08:35
familiar with?
00:08:35
>> Okay,
00:08:36
>> that's the challenge.
00:08:37
>> Yeah,
00:08:38
>> cuz they everybody likes Brad. I mean,
00:08:39
everyone likes Leo and guys like Brad
00:08:41
Pit, so it's hard to when they see those
00:08:43
movies, you go, "Well, I'm already in. I
00:08:44
like those."
00:08:44
>> Well, I'm I'm pushing Revenant.
00:08:47
>> So good.
00:08:47
>> I know
00:08:48
>> they might like that. That's heavy.
00:08:50
>> I mean, that scene with between that
00:08:51
animal is one of the greatest scenes in
00:08:53
>> I think you can leak it at this point.
00:08:55
>> I I don't want to give it away.
00:08:58
Honestly, that's noble. I was just going
00:09:00
to say,
00:09:00
>> let's not give it away.
00:09:01
>> If I lie, that pawum,
00:09:03
>> that that massive pawsome.
00:09:05
>> Yeah. I mean, that massive raccoon
00:09:07
>> big
00:09:08
>> so scary
00:09:09
>> and almost killed him. But um
00:09:10
>> then show them Cocaine Bear right after.
00:09:12
>> Right. So, what I'm going to do today is
00:09:15
Fight Club.
00:09:16
>> Such a good film.
00:09:18
>> Even if you don't get the underlying
00:09:19
message, it's still a good film.
00:09:21
>> Yeah. And Issa's smart, so I think
00:09:22
she'll get Fight Club. Okay. cuz she
00:09:25
they did Old Boy and they did I saw the
00:09:27
devil which are Korean movies or slowb
00:09:28
burn. They still liked it.
00:09:30
>> Yeah. Well, Old Boy is a great film.
00:09:31
>> So, here we go. Then I'm now going to
00:09:33
lean into classic comedies.
00:09:36
>> Okay. So,
00:09:37
>> like Philadelphia, like classic comedy.
00:09:39
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That
00:09:40
scene when he dies.
00:09:42
>> Unbelievably.
00:09:42
>> Unbelievably funny.
00:09:44
>> Yeah.
00:09:44
>> Um
00:09:45
>> precious like films that are just
00:09:46
hysterical through
00:09:47
>> Right. And he did a Christian Bale from
00:09:50
The Machinist. It was
00:09:53
it was really good stuff. You know what
00:09:55
I mean?
00:09:56
>> It almost look like he had it.
00:10:01
>> You know,
00:10:02
>> how about
00:10:02
>> It almost seemed like he had it.
00:10:03
>> Um I love you, Philip Morris.
00:10:06
>> I've never seen that movie.
00:10:08
>> Seriously, you would love that movie.
00:10:11
>> You've never seen Happiness.
00:10:13
>> No.
00:10:14
>> Yeah. You would love that movie.
00:10:16
>> I'll watch that. You watch this.
00:10:17
>> Okay. I'll watch this. You watch that.
00:10:19
you and McGregor and um Jim Carrey.
00:10:22
>> Okay, I will watch this movie. Okay, but
00:10:24
you have to watch Happiness
00:10:25
>> done.
00:10:26
>> Okay, so here. Can I finish my list?
00:10:27
It's not that long.
00:10:28
>> So, I went into comedies. So, best in
00:10:31
show. Waiting for Guffman.
00:10:33
>> Best in show. They will love because
00:10:34
it's about dogs. Waiting for Guffman's a
00:10:36
little bit harder for them to consume,
00:10:37
but I think they'll still like it.
00:10:39
>> Here's a deep cut and you probably never
00:10:41
seen it. Galaxy Quest.
00:10:44
>> No.
00:10:45
>> What?
00:10:45
>> It's good.
00:10:46
>> It's good.
00:10:46
>> Yeah.
00:10:47
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:10:47
>> Never seen it. Wow. Napoleon Dynamite.
00:10:50
>> They'll love that movie. Easily easy
00:10:52
characters. You
00:10:53
>> Here's my fear though. Here's my fear
00:10:54
with the movie though, right? It's so
00:10:56
not based in any kind of reality that
00:10:59
character.
00:10:59
>> Just warn them.
00:11:00
>> I am going to warn them.
00:11:02
>> What do you mean? Yeah, sure it is. You
00:11:02
think
00:11:03
>> he's a nerd. I guess there are people
00:11:04
like that in the world.
00:11:05
>> That's the Midwest.
00:11:06
>> That's everyone. That's McCome.
00:11:09
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's right. That's
00:11:10
you.
00:11:10
>> You know, the Napoleon Dynamite would
00:11:13
have sent me an audition
00:11:15
>> that you didn't get.
00:11:18
I think
00:11:20
>> you know how you didn't get that role.
00:11:23
>> You know who got it?
00:11:26
>> Rory Scoville.
00:11:27
>> Yeah.
00:11:28
>> Yeah. Yeah. Right.
00:11:28
>> I think Scoville got it.
00:11:30
>> Right. Here's here's another one. Office
00:11:33
Space.
00:11:34
>> Uh
00:11:34
>> me and my mom's one of my mom and I's
00:11:36
favorite movie to watch together.
00:11:37
>> Great.
00:11:38
>> One of the most quotable films of all
00:11:39
time.
00:11:40
>> Great [ __ ] movie. Um
00:11:41
>> Jennifer Aniston. Why wouldn't she do
00:11:43
more stuff like that?
00:11:44
>> Yeah. That's who I want.
00:11:45
>> Here's another one that you haven't
00:11:46
seen. H
00:11:47
>> Battle Royale.
00:11:48
>> What a good comedy.
00:11:52
>> Yeah.
00:11:52
>> You know Battle Royale?
00:11:54
>> I don't know if I've seen it.
00:11:55
>> Look at Battle Royale.
00:11:57
>> This is Tarantino's favorite movie.
00:11:59
>> Yeah.
00:12:00
>> Oh, yeah. We've talked about that on the
00:12:01
talked about this on this show.
00:12:02
>> Yeah. You You have to watch Battle
00:12:04
Royale.
00:12:05
>> Yeah.
00:12:06
>> It's incredible.
00:12:06
>> Okay.
00:12:07
>> And the last movie we have on the list
00:12:08
is Drive.
00:12:10
>> Slowburn.
00:12:12
>> Is it Slowburn?
00:12:12
>> Well, I mean, it starts strong but then
00:12:14
drops. It's such a cool movie though.
00:12:16
>> Yeah, but that is that is a slow that is
00:12:18
a tougher movie for them to
00:12:19
>> Okay. I I'm I'm crossing this up and
00:12:21
that's why I want the debate.
00:12:22
>> But I do think they they but Gosling's
00:12:25
in it so you get bonus points on that.
00:12:26
They're going to be locked in on him.
00:12:28
Yeah.
00:12:28
>> But the movie is kind of drawn out.
00:12:29
>> Also, what's his name's on it?
00:12:30
>> Oscar Isaac.
00:12:31
>> Oscar Isaac.
00:12:32
>> Yeah.
00:12:33
>> Okay.
00:12:33
>> But I mean I think the girls will like
00:12:34
Gosling.
00:12:35
>> All right. So let's now come try to come
00:12:38
up with you know I mean new movies from
00:12:40
your point of view because you know I
00:12:41
did a quick
00:12:42
>> through my library.
00:12:44
>> Yeah. And I said no to a lot because I
00:12:46
just like they're just they're too slow
00:12:48
burning or they're not going to get I
00:12:50
also have Spotlight on here because I
00:12:53
love journalist movies, you know, movies
00:12:55
about journalism like network and those
00:12:57
kind of movies.
00:12:58
>> It's an important movie.
00:12:59
>> Spotlight.
00:13:00
>> Spotlight.
00:13:01
>> Spotlight.
00:13:01
>> Spotlight.
00:13:02
>> No, Boston Spotlight.
00:13:04
>> Spotlight.
00:13:05
>> Yeah, that's a good Boston. Thank you.
00:13:06
>> Yeah. Boston Spotlight.
00:13:08
>> Spotlight. Okay.
00:13:08
>> Say park the car.
00:13:10
>> Park the car.
00:13:11
>> And I'll say spotlight.
00:13:12
>> Spotlight.
00:13:13
>> Yeah.
00:13:13
>> Okay. It's good.
00:13:14
>> All right. So, what's some other movies
00:13:17
do you think?
00:13:18
>> Uh, funny comedy movies or just
00:13:19
>> No, just in movies in general that are
00:13:21
evergreen that like if they've never
00:13:24
seen
00:13:24
>> Well, Forest Gump is an evergreen.
00:13:25
>> They've seen that. Everyone's seen that.
00:13:27
That's mandatory. The government does
00:13:28
that.
00:13:29
>> When you get your citizenship, do they
00:13:30
make you wa they make you watch Forest
00:13:32
Gump?
00:13:32
>> Yeah. I mean, that that movie they
00:13:34
obvious has seen.
00:13:35
>> Okay.
00:13:36
>> Okay. Let's go. Um,
00:13:38
>> well, I would say that I would say if
00:13:39
you want comedy, the
00:13:40
>> No, no, let's go. Let's start with
00:13:42
action. Uh,
00:13:43
>> I showed them tomorrow.
00:13:45
>> Die Hard. [ __ ] that's a good one. Die
00:13:47
Hard.
00:13:47
>> Speed.
00:13:48
>> Speed.
00:13:49
>> Movie's awesome.
00:13:50
>> Phenomenal.
00:13:51
>> Terminator 2.
00:13:52
>> Yes.
00:13:53
>> So much better than than Terminator 1.
00:13:55
Yeah,
00:13:55
>> it's crazy how much better Termin It's.
00:13:56
It's crazy that a sequel was much
00:13:58
stronger than the original.
00:13:59
>> [ __ ] good.
00:13:59
>> I can't name that for many movies.
00:14:02
>> Although people do say Godfather 2 is
00:14:03
better than the first one. A lot of
00:14:04
people like two more than one.
00:14:06
>> I could have that debate with you.
00:14:08
>> I disagree. I think Godfather one's a
00:14:09
better movie, but people do think the
00:14:10
second one. Oh, Dark Knight. Empire
00:14:12
Strikes Back. Better than the original.
00:14:13
>> Don't Don't look it up.
00:14:14
>> No, we're just looking up better
00:14:15
sequels.
00:14:16
>> Uh, Toy Story 2 was better than Toy
00:14:17
Story 1.
00:14:18
>> I don't Please not look it up.
00:14:19
>> Okay.
00:14:20
>> All right. Turn Turn it off. I'm sorry.
00:14:21
I'm controlling. I need your pure
00:14:23
opinion.
00:14:24
>> Yeah.
00:14:24
>> Okay.
00:14:25
>> So, what did I say so far?
00:14:26
>> You said Die Hard. Very good choice. I
00:14:28
might They probably have seen it.
00:14:29
>> Dieard.
00:14:30
>> And I don't know how I I don't know if
00:14:32
it still translates.
00:14:34
>> It does. Well, Die Hard 3 is really
00:14:36
good, too.
00:14:36
>> Yeah. I'm I'm a Die Hard 4 guy.
00:14:39
>> Yeah. Yeah. The new one.
00:14:40
>> Dard made me sad talking about it.
00:14:43
>> The first movie?
00:14:44
>> No, it just made me sad talking about it
00:14:45
because of Bruce.
00:14:47
>> Oh,
00:14:49
>> Bruce Campbell.
00:14:50
>> Bruce Campbell. Yeah, my my acting coach
00:14:53
Bruce Campbell.
00:14:55
>> Yeah.
00:14:55
>> No, cuz of Bruce Willis, dog. It's so
00:14:57
sad.
00:14:58
>> It's so sad that we're watching a legend
00:15:00
die in front of us.
00:15:01
>> I got another one.
00:15:02
>> It's [ __ ] awful. And he's awful. He's
00:15:03
the man, dude. He's so
00:15:05
>> He is a man. He's a he him. Um,
00:15:08
>> the Six Sense is a good movie.
00:15:10
>> No, they already seen it.
00:15:11
>> Okay,
00:15:11
>> but here's another one.
00:15:13
>> Signs. Signs.
00:15:14
>> I I showed them already.
00:15:16
>> Signs.
00:15:17
>> Looper.
00:15:18
>> Oh my god.
00:15:18
>> I love Looper.
00:15:19
>> Why is that? Why people hated on that
00:15:21
movie? I thought it was great.
00:15:22
>> Looper. Because you said um Bruce
00:15:24
Willis.
00:15:24
>> I know. Well, Bruce, if you want to go
00:15:26
through Bruce's repertoire, he's got
00:15:28
>> Let's go. Let's
00:15:28
>> Well, Pulp Fiction might be the best
00:15:29
role he
00:15:30
>> Yeah, I think they've already seen it.
00:15:32
Can we do Wes Anderson or No.
00:15:33
>> Yeah. Rushmore.
00:15:35
>> Old Wes. So, you can't do new like
00:15:37
>> tenon bombs.
00:15:38
>> You can't do like the Budapest Hotel or
00:15:39
whatever the [ __ ] that was.
00:15:41
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:15:41
>> No, they're never going to like that
00:15:42
movie.
00:15:43
>> What was the other one? The Space One in
00:15:45
the Desert.
00:15:46
>> Uh the
00:15:47
>> Oh, I I saw that movie.
00:15:49
>> City.
00:15:50
>> Yeah.
00:15:50
>> Yeah. Terrible.
00:15:51
>> I enjoyed it.
00:15:51
>> Missed by a mile.
00:15:52
>> I think Rushmore.
00:15:53
>> You enjoyed it because of a visual
00:15:54
because the visuals are incredible with
00:15:56
Wes.
00:15:56
>> I mean, I I could do the I could do the
00:15:58
list of Wes Anderson movie. I think the
00:16:00
best one is Royal Helen Bumps.
00:16:01
>> Yeah.
00:16:02
>> Second best Rushmore.
00:16:03
>> No, you're missing one.
00:16:05
>> I'm not done. Okay.
00:16:06
>> Was my list. Third one, Bottle Rocket.
00:16:10
>> Love that movie.
00:16:11
>> Okay.
00:16:11
>> Right. And then I think Steve Cesu, the
00:16:14
>> Life Aquatic. Aquatic. I would say that
00:16:16
slides up my list.
00:16:17
>> Really? Life Aquatic.
00:16:18
>> Such a funny movie.
00:16:19
>> Yeah.
00:16:20
>> And then number five would be The Grand
00:16:22
Budapest.
00:16:22
>> What about RGing Limited?
00:16:25
>> Uh, it was okay.
00:16:26
>> It was fine. I love that movie.
00:16:26
>> It was fine. It really good though.
00:16:28
>> Bottle Rocket should be maybe maybe one.
00:16:30
>> Okay, let's go. Let's now Is this
00:16:33
boring?
00:16:33
>> Yeah. But I'm enjoying it. I don't give
00:16:36
a [ __ ]
00:16:37
>> People I think people would enjoy
00:16:39
listening to what our movie
00:16:40
>> list movies. I don't know. You want to
00:16:41
know a movie that I really like?
00:16:43
>> Well, I thought that that was over now.
00:16:45
>> Well, I'm transitioning into something
00:16:46
funny.
00:16:48
>> I'm trying to
00:16:49
>> That's why I looked this way.
00:16:50
>> Yeah, you have to.
00:16:52
>> You have
00:16:52
>> that. What you just did is the reason
00:16:54
why I worked look that way.
00:16:56
>> What did you learn when we shot the game
00:16:57
show that that Andrew sometimes has to
00:16:59
guide the boat back to
00:17:01
>> reality? Well, because if you're on the
00:17:03
boat, the rudder's going one way and the
00:17:05
bow's facing the other and it's awesome.
00:17:07
But occasionally it's going to crash
00:17:09
into the shore.
00:17:10
>> Yeah.
00:17:11
>> So then sometimes captain has to take
00:17:12
over and spin that [ __ ] back to
00:17:14
>> That's right. You're John Luke Bard in
00:17:17
Yeah.
00:17:17
>> Thank you.
00:17:17
>> Yeah. Who am I in that? Anyway, let's
00:17:19
move on.
00:17:20
>> Spock, but there's no Vulcans in.
00:17:22
>> You're Spock.
00:17:23
>> There's no Vulcans on Next Generation.
00:17:25
Anyway,
00:17:25
>> so what what in our world that can't
00:17:27
exist?
00:17:28
>> That's true. I'll be Spock.
00:17:29
>> You are Spock. 100% Spock. Uh,
00:17:32
>> can you do it with both fingers? I can't
00:17:33
do it with my right.
00:17:35
>> Whoa.
00:17:35
>> Whoa. That's good. Go ahead.
00:17:38
>> Uh, so we made mone. Mone found a very
00:17:40
pretty woman at at the at the bar last
00:17:42
night and we were we were having a
00:17:44
little snack and a meal in a post post
00:17:45
round wrap-up beer for a tough week that
00:17:47
we did. We went and had ourselves a beer
00:17:49
and McCone said, "That girl's
00:17:50
beautiful." She is. She's very pretty.
00:17:53
>> Can I ask you a question?
00:17:54
>> Sorry.
00:17:54
>> Did I work as hard as you
00:17:56
>> just during that week? I mean,
00:17:59
>> no.
00:18:02
Are you Are you being serious?
00:18:04
>> I mean, I showed up on time, you know
00:18:06
what I mean?
00:18:07
>> Yeah.
00:18:07
>> And I I I added some things, my improvis
00:18:10
skills and this and that.
00:18:11
>> No, you did an incredible job.
00:18:13
>> Right. But why was I But if you try to
00:18:14
say,
00:18:15
>> but you think I did better than Mone did
00:18:17
better than me?
00:18:17
>> You just asked me, did you work as hard
00:18:19
as me?
00:18:20
>> No, you did. No, you did.
00:18:21
>> Yes.
00:18:21
>> But did Mone work as hard as me?
00:18:23
>> That wasn't the original question. No,
00:18:24
Mone.
00:18:25
>> But then why didn't I get to go to the
00:18:26
celebrity
00:18:27
celebratory uh meeting with you? You
00:18:29
were watching movies last night.
00:18:30
>> That's right. Okay. Go ahead. Keep
00:18:33
going.
00:18:33
>> Okay.
00:18:34
>> Hot chick bar.
00:18:35
>> Hot chick was at the bar. He said, "I
00:18:37
kind of want to talk to her." And
00:18:38
immediately I was kind of buzzing on one
00:18:40
last night cuz I had taken a a good
00:18:43
amount of edibles and um not drunk, but
00:18:47
I was just taking edibles and I said,
00:18:48
"You know, you do look exactly like Lord
00:18:50
Farquad from Shrek." He last night he
00:18:53
really looked like it a lot. A lot a
00:18:55
lot. A lot.
00:18:56
>> Wow. Wow. Let's go look. I mean, if
00:18:58
that's not McCone, if he shaves the
00:19:00
mustache, that's Mone.
00:19:01
>> Yeah. You're Lord Guang.
00:19:03
>> You're Farquad.
00:19:04
>> Yeah, you're Farquad.
00:19:04
>> Lord Farquad, man.
00:19:06
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:19:07
>> I want I said to Mone, "Go up to that
00:19:09
pretty girl that you like so much and
00:19:11
and have the icebreaker go, have you
00:19:12
guys seen Shrek?"
00:19:14
>> And they'll inevitably say, "Of course."
00:19:15
And he'll go, "Well,
00:19:17
>> I'm here.
00:19:18
>> Lord Lord Farquad at your service." And
00:19:20
he did.
00:19:21
>> And it was killing. And they're laughing
00:19:23
and smiling. I have the video. No sound
00:19:24
cuz he's far away, but they're loving
00:19:26
it. These two girls are loving him.
00:19:27
They're loving it. Then finally the face
00:19:29
changes. I see him go.
00:19:30
>> And then she goes like this.
00:19:32
>> And then he goes
00:19:35
>> like this.
00:19:36
>> He puts his fist up
00:19:37
>> like like you're you won something at
00:19:39
the gold and you're black.
00:19:41
>> No. Like
00:19:41
>> at the Olympics.
00:19:42
>> He was saying black power.
00:19:43
>> Did you do black power move?
00:19:44
>> I did do black.
00:19:45
>> You you can never do black power.
00:19:48
>> Well, there were two white girls first
00:19:49
of all, which I thought was very odd.
00:19:50
But they nodded away and kind of
00:19:52
laughed.
00:19:52
>> You have to do this.
00:19:53
>> Yeah, that's okay.
00:19:54
>> Yeah, that's the white thing. Okie dokie
00:19:56
is your thing, right? This is for
00:19:57
someone cooler.
00:19:58
>> He asked for the girl's number and she
00:20:00
said, "I'm a lesbian." And then he puts
00:20:01
his black power fist up.
00:20:03
>> That's amazing. That is [ __ ]
00:20:06
>> Bluetooth. As a 54 year old man,
00:20:09
sometimes the rocket won't launch.
00:20:11
>> Well, a lot of times there's not enough
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00:20:13
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00:20:14
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>> I said I said I said respect. I'm down.
00:24:30
>> He said respect I'm down. Black power to
00:24:32
two white women, two white lesbians. And
00:24:33
then came back and sat down.
00:24:34
>> Do you Wow.
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>> And I was like what? Why did you do the
00:24:36
fist?
00:24:37
>> Why did you do Why did you do the fist?
00:24:38
>> I didn't know what else to do.
00:24:40
>> When someone says, "I'm a lesbian." You
00:24:41
put up a black power fist.
00:24:43
>> There are white people hand gestures,
00:24:45
right, that you're allowed to do.
00:24:47
>> Yeah. This one. You can do this one off.
00:24:49
>> Yeah. You can do that one, right? You
00:24:50
can wave, right?
00:24:53
>> You can do peace. You mean you can do
00:24:56
shaka.
00:24:56
>> Oh, Shaka is good. Yes, I'm down.
00:24:58
>> I think Shaka is good, right? You can do
00:25:00
heavy metal.
00:25:01
>> Yeah. Rock on.
00:25:02
>> Rock on. Right. BUT YOU CANNOT
00:25:06
>> DO THIS.
00:25:07
>> You can't do that.
00:25:08
>> Okay. So, that was your opening line.
00:25:10
Have you seen
00:25:10
>> Have you seen Shrek?
00:25:12
>> Yeah. And then, well, yeah. Andrew gave
00:25:14
it to me and then I said that and then
00:25:15
they laughed and they said, "Well, you
00:25:17
also kind of look like the berries and
00:25:19
cream kid."
00:25:19
>> He does. Starburst.
00:25:21
>> Berries and cream. Berries.
00:25:22
>> Do you think that opening would work for
00:25:24
me if I walked up to a group of girls at
00:25:26
a bar and I said, "You ever watched
00:25:27
Despic Despicable Me?"
00:25:31
And they go, "Yeah." I go, "Minion,
00:25:33
>> do your do your sound. Do your minion.
00:25:37
>> It's my favorite
00:25:39
>> when you do that on stage. It's my
00:25:40
favorite sound you do." I when I listen
00:25:42
to that bit, that's my favorite sound.
00:25:45
>> Cuz you always go.
00:25:47
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:25:48
>> So, um yeah, that that's not a good
00:25:50
opener to me. But, um
00:25:52
>> it landed. They got a huge laugh.
00:25:53
>> Did they get a real laugh?
00:25:54
>> Good work.
00:25:54
>> Of course it did because it's it's
00:25:56
self-deprecating. It's funny. It's easy.
00:25:58
It's not saying like, "What are you
00:25:59
chicks up to?" or you It's not like a
00:26:01
bro energy. He just went, "Have you guys
00:26:02
seen Shrek?" Yeah.
00:26:03
>> And they go, "Of course." And he goes,
00:26:04
"It's me. It's Lord Farquad."
00:26:06
>> Yeah.
00:26:06
>> Beautiful. Then they loved it. It was
00:26:08
endearing.
00:26:09
>> I love the lesbians. The one girl was
00:26:11
straight though.
00:26:12
>> Yeah.
00:26:12
>> You asked for the wrong girl's number.
00:26:14
>> And here's the thing about um Well, so
00:26:17
they weren't seeing each other.
00:26:18
>> No, no, they were just friends at the
00:26:19
bar.
00:26:20
>> Ah, because in that situation and and I
00:26:22
don't want any [ __ ] flak from anybody
00:26:24
because it's just my opinion. Okay.
00:26:25
>> Yeah. You're allowed to have it.
00:26:26
>> Yeah. Yeah. Is I think one should be
00:26:28
hot, one should be not.
00:26:30
>> If it's a if it's one's gay and one's
00:26:32
not.
00:26:32
>> No. If they're both two lesbian couples,
00:26:34
>> you can't have two hot lesbians.
00:26:36
>> It drives me crazy.
00:26:37
>> Why? because it's too off the market.
00:26:41
>> Oh, you think they took it from you?
00:26:44
>> It's like, you know, it's like the I'm
00:26:46
going to just Do you understand what I'm
00:26:48
Carlos? Do you know what I'm saying?
00:26:49
>> Yes.
00:26:49
>> Yeah. Okay.
00:26:50
>> Two different markets, man.
00:26:51
>> Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to just tell you
00:26:52
about this. The exchange in R.
00:26:54
>> You're at the meat market there at the
00:26:55
fish markets. Two different markets.
00:26:56
>> So, my old hangup back in the 70s and is
00:26:59
this, right?
00:27:00
>> That Asian women women were fetishized.
00:27:03
>> Still are.
00:27:04
>> I know, right? And white dudes would get
00:27:06
them, right? and say, "I'm dating
00:27:08
Danny." A Asian woman would say,
00:27:11
>> "But we never got to get get with white
00:27:13
girls." I think the exchange rate was
00:27:16
very poor.
00:27:16
>> You exclusively date white women now.
00:27:18
>> I know, but I figured out the game.
00:27:20
>> He's trying to correct the Oh,
00:27:22
>> and also times have changed. So now it's
00:27:25
I I'm used to going on stage and see a
00:27:27
mid Asian dude with a hot white
00:27:30
>> because just the times have changed.
00:27:32
>> Who you referencing?
00:27:35
>> What?
00:27:35
>> The mirror. who you're referencing.
00:27:37
Who's the hot Asian guy with the or
00:27:39
who's the mid mid- Asian guy with the
00:27:40
hot
00:27:40
>> me?
00:27:41
>> Yeah.
00:27:41
>> Someone that looks like me, I'll see
00:27:43
with a very attractive white girl. And
00:27:45
now it makes sense. Back in the 70s, 80s
00:27:48
though, the exchange rate, we got
00:27:50
nothing and they got all of it. And even
00:27:53
white girls and black girls didn't like
00:27:54
us. So, I think we're the original
00:27:56
incelss, right?
00:27:57
>> Could you ever date what you couldn't
00:27:58
date?
00:27:59
>> I 100% would. I would marry Candace
00:28:01
Owens right now.
00:28:02
>> Oh my god.
00:28:03
>> Hm. I think she likes white guys.
00:28:06
>> Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I don't
00:28:08
have a shot. But there's something about
00:28:10
Candace Owens
00:28:12
>> because I feel like I'll lay in bed and
00:28:13
won't be bored.
00:28:15
>> I don't think she sleeps.
00:28:16
>> I have no racial preferences on
00:28:19
anything. You know what I mean? If
00:28:20
they're attractive and you know what I
00:28:21
mean? Indian I'll do. You know what I
00:28:24
mean? I I don't Yeah, there's not one. I
00:28:26
mean, maybe there is a couple, but uh
00:28:29
it's only because I've never meet met
00:28:31
them before.
00:28:31
>> Well, it's not in your circle. There's
00:28:33
some certain people I've never met
00:28:35
before and and I'll never meet. Like
00:28:38
Eskimo,
00:28:39
>> who I would love.
00:28:39
>> What is it? It's Inuit, right?
00:28:40
>> Inuit, but with more of an Asian slant.
00:28:44
>> It's Inuit. I I mean, you know, you're
00:28:46
going to get uh It's like It looks like
00:28:47
Native American and and
00:28:49
>> Oh, I love the Native American.
00:28:50
>> It looks like Native American and Asian
00:28:52
combined.
00:28:52
>> Yeah,
00:28:52
>> it's a great combo.
00:28:53
>> And penguin a little bit.
00:28:57
>> You can You can take that. You can have
00:28:59
that one.
00:28:59
>> You going to have that one?
00:29:00
>> Yeah, have that one.
00:29:00
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:29:01
>> I don't want that. Yeah. Not touching
00:29:02
that.
00:29:03
>> Yeah. Um, just because penguins live up
00:29:06
up north.
00:29:06
>> I got it.
00:29:07
>> Okay.
00:29:07
>> I think they got it.
00:29:08
>> All right. I was just throwing out a
00:29:10
joke. It's not a
00:29:10
>> I loved it.
00:29:11
>> I have nothing against Eskimos.
00:29:13
>> Inuit.
00:29:14
>> Inuits. Okay. I love them all. Okay. I I
00:29:17
love Native Americans, but there's So,
00:29:19
I've never met an Eskimo. Uh, I've met
00:29:22
Mong now. That's pretty cool.
00:29:23
>> Well, we had a ton at our show.
00:29:24
>> Yeah, we have a ton of Mongs, you know,
00:29:26
very attractive people. Um, a
00:29:27
>> lot of Mong fans.
00:29:28
>> Yeah. But there's I don't think is maybe
00:29:30
I've met everyone. I don't know. What is
00:29:32
one that Well, you know what I haven't
00:29:34
met is that island where they're still
00:29:36
tribal and they kill the Christians that
00:29:38
try to go to the island and they kill
00:29:39
them.
00:29:40
>> Yes. The term Eskimo is considered
00:29:42
offensive, derogatory, and outdated by
00:29:44
many indigenous people, particularly in
00:29:46
Canada and Greenland. It's a colonial
00:29:47
label. Uh while still used by some in
00:29:50
Alaska, it's increasingly replaced by
00:29:51
civic group names like Inuit, uh Inu
00:29:54
Kapak, or Yupek. I'm sorry, I can't
00:29:56
pronounce that. I have no idea. Can I
00:29:57
can I tell you a fun fact
00:29:59
>> about this? Right.
00:30:01
>> So, you know those Iranian um Lego
00:30:03
videos? Have you seen those?
00:30:04
>> What is Lego got to say about this?
00:30:06
>> This is what I'm saying. This is what
00:30:07
I'm saying.
00:30:08
>> Is Lego going to
00:30:09
>> I'm going to tell you why.
00:30:09
>> Yeah.
00:30:10
>> Lego is where m where is Lego head their
00:30:13
headquarters?
00:30:14
>> Germany, right?
00:30:15
>> Denmark.
00:30:15
>> Oh, Denmark. That's right.
00:30:16
>> Who does Denmark run?
00:30:18
>> Who does Denmark run?
00:30:20
>> Greenland.
00:30:21
>> Denmark. Well, they're Yes. Right.
00:30:23
>> Yes.
00:30:24
>> And who tried to take Greenland? We did.
00:30:27
>> They're not going to complain.
00:30:29
>> Not gonna complain.
00:30:30
>> Interesting.
00:30:31
>> Interesting.
00:30:32
>> But um Yeah. So, they're fighting their
00:30:34
war through this as well.
00:30:37
>> It's also ironic we have a lot of
00:30:38
Iranian friends here in Los Angeles.
00:30:39
Yeah.
00:30:40
>> That's even crazier.
00:30:41
>> Yeah. I went up to Amir Kay last night.
00:30:43
>> Yeah.
00:30:43
>> He had tears in his eyes.
00:30:44
>> Well, it's [ __ ]
00:30:45
>> Yeah. And I walked because his dad's in
00:30:47
Iran.
00:30:47
>> That's right. Yeah.
00:30:48
>> Right. And I I hugged him and I
00:30:50
whispered in his ear and I sincerely
00:30:52
went, "I'm so [ __ ] sorry, dude."
00:30:54
>> Yeah. It sucks.
00:30:55
>> It [ __ ] sucks. But um and he doesn't
00:30:58
he can't even sometimes get in contact
00:30:59
with him.
00:31:00
>> Wow.
00:31:01
>> Imagine that.
00:31:02
>> No, I mean it's insane.
00:31:03
>> Yeah. Yeah. And he's like I get he gets
00:31:04
worried. You know what I mean? And he
00:31:06
told me the city that um his dad is in
00:31:08
and I've never heard of it before. I
00:31:09
can't repeat it. I don't know what it
00:31:11
is. But um it's not Teran. It's like you
00:31:13
know in more rural but he's still like
00:31:16
scared because you know I mean
00:31:17
>> Turban. He's in Turban.
00:31:18
>> Turban. God. You're so good.
00:31:20
>> Turban. Yeah.
00:31:21
>> Not Tan. That's what I'm doing right
00:31:22
now. A joke. It's what I'm doing right
00:31:23
now. I'm looking right at you.
00:31:24
>> Thank you.
00:31:25
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:31:25
>> Turban was a joke.
00:31:27
>> It was.
00:31:28
>> Well, Tyrron and Turban. Turban. I It
00:31:32
was a bad
00:31:32
>> Dude, your play on words sometimes.
00:31:34
>> Sometimes. Yeah.
00:31:35
>> They go behind my head.
00:31:36
>> They do sometimes.
00:31:37
>> Well, when they go over your head, it's
00:31:39
a bummer because it misses.
00:31:40
>> And then
00:31:41
>> it doesn't miss it with the audience
00:31:42
though.
00:31:42
>> No, they hate it.
00:31:45
>> They do.
00:31:46
>> I think so.
00:31:47
>> Clip those.
00:31:47
>> Yeah, we'll clip those.
00:31:49
>> No, it is it is very sad. And also uh
00:31:51
you know um the end is near. So
00:31:54
>> there is a feeling of end is near. I
00:31:56
mean the other day we talked about
00:31:57
Vietnam War on the couch backstage and
00:32:00
we talked about he said aren't you
00:32:01
scared?
00:32:02
>> Yeah.
00:32:02
>> And I said I don't know what do you want
00:32:04
me to do? There's nothing I can do.
00:32:05
>> Yeah. He has a really weird way of like
00:32:08
you know like if it ends it ends
00:32:10
>> cuz what it's the same way I feel on an
00:32:12
airplane. I I can't control this. It's
00:32:13
not I if the plane crashed.
00:32:16
>> Yeah.
00:32:16
>> Okay. But what are your thoughts right
00:32:19
before it hits
00:32:20
>> the plane?
00:32:20
>> Are you screaming or not? Are you scuz
00:32:22
I'll be screaming?
00:32:23
>> No chance.
00:32:23
>> You're not screaming.
00:32:24
>> Dead silent.
00:32:25
>> OH, DUDE. YOU HAVE NIGHT TEARS, you
00:32:26
[ __ ]
00:32:28
>> That's not real.
00:32:30
>> That's true.
00:32:31
>> When it really is happening, you're not
00:32:32
going to be screaming. You're not GOING
00:32:34
TO DO THAT.
00:32:35
>> RIGHT DOWN THE HALL.
00:32:36
>> He falls asleep on a plane and and he
00:32:39
has a night terror as IT'S CRASHING.
00:32:42
>> THAT'S DOUBLE. That's That's double.
00:32:44
Imagine. Imagine what you would do.
00:32:47
Okay.
00:32:48
>> I wouldn't be screaming if the plane
00:32:49
went down. I I
00:32:50
>> How about you, Carlos?
00:32:51
>> I screamed on the way to London. Very
00:32:53
nervous on planes.
00:32:54
>> I feel [ __ ] like really loudly. It was
00:32:56
bad.
00:32:56
>> When we took a flight as a family
00:32:58
recently, you did get a little panicked
00:33:00
of the winds.
00:33:01
>> I get nervous on planes. Yeah.
00:33:02
>> But you got to know that it's fine.
00:33:04
>> Oh, yeah. I It just My body doesn't
00:33:06
realize that.
00:33:07
>> But if it did crash,
00:33:09
>> we're on TMZ. It's great.
00:33:12
Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino die with
00:33:14
other friends aboard.
00:33:16
>> Oh yeah. Yeah. You they might not even
00:33:18
mention your names in it.
00:33:19
>> No, there's no way. But like there could
00:33:21
be like a picture in slide four.
00:33:23
>> Yeah, but you don't get a sign at the
00:33:24
comedy store.
00:33:25
>> No, of course.
00:33:27
>> That's all you. That's so funny.
00:33:28
>> That's the only thing I want.
00:33:29
>> Make God laugh.
00:33:30
>> I already told them. You know that,
00:33:31
right?
00:33:31
>> Yeah. What?
00:33:32
>> It's got to be up for two weeks
00:33:33
>> when you die.
00:33:34
>> Oh, yeah.
00:33:36
>> Sometimes cuz when when a comic dies,
00:33:38
they put it up for two days.
00:33:39
>> Two days. Sometimes it's a day.
00:33:40
>> A day. I get two weeks. And they made an
00:33:43
agreement. Peter did. Sure.
00:33:44
>> It's weird to replace it. It's just like
00:33:46
you take it down and it's chocolate
00:33:47
Sundays right after Bobby Lee. Chocolate
00:33:49
Sundays.
00:33:50
>> Yeah. Yeah. The old Dude, that'd be
00:33:52
[ __ ] That would break my heart in
00:33:53
heaven.
00:33:54
>> Wherever I go.
00:33:55
>> It's funny filming. We'll put it on our
00:33:56
Patreon. When we die, they'll take our
00:33:58
name down and replace it with uh
00:34:00
whatever whatever what's goop show.
00:34:02
Terri horribly funny.
00:34:04
>> Horribly funny coming out this week in
00:34:05
the store as they take down to RIP Bobby
00:34:07
Lee. Dude, that would break my [ __ ]
00:34:10
heart.
00:34:10
>> Well, that's what, you know, classically
00:34:11
in Los Angeles, the running joke was
00:34:12
that they always did the laugh factory.
00:34:14
Their sign always said, "Make God laugh
00:34:16
and then the name and the store would
00:34:17
just put RIP to the person."
00:34:19
>> But make God laugh. It's It's just It's
00:34:22
almost condescending.
00:34:23
>> Yeah. But you know what they would say?
00:34:25
Somebody told me this joke. If you died,
00:34:27
they would put literally make God ra
00:34:35
>> Johnny Sanchez told me that.
00:34:36
>> So funny. They're going to put God make
00:34:38
God raff.
00:34:38
>> Make God Raph.
00:34:39
>> Yeah. I I'll tell you in that scenario,
00:34:42
if the plane goes down, right, that if I
00:34:45
had a kid, I wouldn't scream
00:34:48
>> because I would hold their hand and I I
00:34:50
would have to have a stoicism.
00:34:52
>> But you don't have a child, so what
00:34:53
would you do?
00:34:53
>> Scream.
00:34:54
>> Yeah, you scream.
00:34:54
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I would scream.
00:34:56
>> Yeah. You got to scream.
00:34:56
>> Oh, I would add a muk in there. What
00:34:58
does he say?
00:34:59
>> I'd worsen it.
00:35:01
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:35:02
>> Oh, you said people giving the ick on
00:35:04
airplanes. No, there's like you don't
00:35:05
want to scream when the plane goes down
00:35:06
so you don't give a hot girl the ick.
00:35:08
>> Right. Right. As you're dying.
00:35:10
>> Yeah.
00:35:10
>> Is it somebody that you're seeing?
00:35:11
>> No.
00:35:12
>> No. He's just saying in general.
00:35:13
>> Yeah.
00:35:14
>> If I was with a girl I was seeing
00:35:16
seriously. Um I would hold their hands.
00:35:19
Depending on what they do, I would do
00:35:20
the same. I think
00:35:21
>> one forehead kiss. I'd say goodbye.
00:35:23
>> I would do an Eskimo nose rub.
00:35:26
>> What?
00:35:26
>> Huh?
00:35:27
>> Init.
00:35:28
>> An init. Sorry, my bad. That I didn't
00:35:31
learn my lesson.
00:35:32
>> Inuit kiss. and and it went good. Yeah.
00:35:35
Yeah. Yeah. But um yeah, I I some you
00:35:39
know, here's the thing. Sometimes when
00:35:40
there's really bad turbulence, I don't
00:35:43
get scared
00:35:43
>> cuz you're at the front of the plane.
00:35:44
It's not as bad or in the back where
00:35:47
it's really bad.
00:35:48
>> In the back, you actually are more
00:35:50
likely to survive.
00:35:50
>> Y
00:35:51
>> you know that for the front front
00:35:52
usually gets killed first.
00:35:54
>> Yeah.
00:35:54
>> Back survives. You're 35F, you're gonna
00:35:56
you might live. You're two You're 2B.
00:35:59
>> Your head is through the front window of
00:36:01
the plane.
00:36:02
>> Yeah. I I I
00:36:04
um
00:36:04
>> during heavy turbulence I always ask for
00:36:06
a drink.
00:36:07
>> You do?
00:36:07
>> When it's like really really bad, I'm
00:36:08
always like, "Can I get a coffee?"
00:36:10
>> And they're just sitting belted in.
00:36:11
They'll see a building. What?
00:36:13
>> Just a little coffee. One shot
00:36:14
>> and they're like, "Well, it's [ __ ]
00:36:16
insane. That's insane."
00:36:18
>> No, I don't. I'm kidding.
00:36:19
>> Yeah. Yeah. You don't I I always think
00:36:21
of scenarios of what I would do to
00:36:23
survive.
00:36:26
>> Run to the back.
00:36:27
>> No, I wouldn't run to the back. What I
00:36:28
would do is I think I would do this
00:36:30
midair.
00:36:32
You know what I mean?
00:36:33
>> You stand up and do the manggina while
00:36:34
it's crashing.
00:36:37
>> Give everyone a laugh as the plane's
00:36:38
going down.
00:36:39
>> Do a Silence of the Lambs.
00:36:40
>> Yeah.
00:36:40
>> No. No. I would maybe get one laugh,
00:36:43
right?
00:36:44
>> Just get completely naked or something.
00:36:46
But um Well, you know, I would if it's
00:36:48
over the ocean, I would get naked.
00:36:51
Do you know why?
00:36:52
>> Because you're going to swim.
00:36:54
>> No, I'd be dead.
00:36:57
So that that I don't It's about the
00:36:59
environment.
00:37:00
M.
00:37:01
>> So the sharks can just eat me whole.
00:37:03
>> You think the clothes without clothes
00:37:05
and my [ __ ] golden goose shoes?
00:37:07
>> No, he's wearing golden goose. I can't
00:37:08
eat him.
00:37:08
>> Yeah, cuz usually they're going to, you
00:37:09
know, a short a shark's going to be on a
00:37:11
beach and they're going to find my
00:37:12
golden goo.
00:37:12
>> Shark comes up to you. He's like, is
00:37:13
that a made worn shirt? I'm not eating
00:37:15
that.
00:37:16
>> I don't want to ruin that.
00:37:18
>> Yeah.
00:37:19
>> Shark's like, you know, that's like a
00:37:20
$300 SHIRT. I'M NOT EATING through that.
00:37:22
>> Yeah.
00:37:23
>> Out of respect, the shark has
00:37:25
>> I think I would get naked so that the
00:37:26
they can eat the orca. You know what I
00:37:28
mean?
00:37:29
>> Right. They can just eat me quick.
00:37:30
>> I love how you think clothes are going
00:37:31
to deter these animals from eating you.
00:37:32
You're in their house. They're going to
00:37:33
eat you.
00:37:34
>> It's not that. I don't want them to get
00:37:35
diarrhea or get a stomach ache.
00:37:37
>> Oh, you're concerned with their diet.
00:37:39
>> Yes.
00:37:39
>> That's smart.
00:37:40
>> Just eat me whole.
00:37:41
>> Eat me whole. One big gulp.
00:37:42
>> One big gulp. Right. Cuz if they have to
00:37:44
tear the shirt probably with they don't
00:37:46
>> they just eat you, bud. They'll just
00:37:47
take that with it. It's like, you know,
00:37:49
>> even if I had like a
00:37:50
>> You know, sometimes when you eat a piece
00:37:51
of candy and you get some of the wrapper
00:37:52
in there.
00:37:54
>> No, I don't. Same thing for sure.
00:37:55
>> No, I don't.
00:37:56
>> OH, [ __ ] CAN I TELL YOU WHAT happened
00:37:58
to me yesterday,
00:37:59
>> please?
00:37:59
>> So, yeah. So, okay. So, Honey went to
00:38:02
Kala's house.
00:38:03
>> Mhm.
00:38:03
>> Right. So, I had no one in the house
00:38:05
>> all alone.
00:38:06
>> And I don't know how to cook.
00:38:08
>> Okay. And she eat healthy.
00:38:09
>> Who does?
00:38:10
>> Right. I've never boiled a hard egg
00:38:12
before.
00:38:15
>> I've never boiled a hard egg either.
00:38:17
Actually,
00:38:18
>> I'm being serious. I've never hard
00:38:19
boiled an egg in my life.
00:38:20
>> You've never hard boiled an egg?
00:38:21
>> Not interested in it.
00:38:22
>> I like them. I
00:38:23
>> I like them if I can go get them and
00:38:25
they're made. I don't want to make it at
00:38:26
home. Exact. I tried.
00:38:27
>> It's so hard.
00:38:29
>> That's why it's called something more
00:38:31
horrifying happened when I did it,
00:38:32
though.
00:38:32
>> What?
00:38:33
>> So, I went to Chat GBT and I'll never go
00:38:35
back to Chat GBT again to like teach me
00:38:38
how to cook something cuz they're wrong.
00:38:40
>> It's wrong.
00:38:41
>> It's wrong.
00:38:41
>> Okay.
00:38:42
>> And number two, I'm boiling them and I
00:38:45
see one of the eggs and sticking out of
00:38:47
the egg is a [ __ ] feather.
00:38:50
>> What?
00:38:50
>> A ballute. You throw a ball in there
00:38:55
>> and I'm like, "What the fuck?" And I I
00:38:57
have a photo of it.
00:38:58
>> Yeah.
00:38:58
>> Yeah.
00:38:59
>> You're not going to
00:39:00
>> send it to Carlos so we can look at it
00:39:01
together.
00:39:02
>> I'll send it to Carlos right now if you
00:39:03
>> storebought eggs occasionally have
00:39:04
feathers on them. It's less common in
00:39:05
the United States due to industrialized
00:39:07
washing processes. These feathers are
00:39:08
incidental remnants from the natural
00:39:10
nesting and laying process. Sometimes,
00:39:11
surprisingly, are generally safe. You
00:39:12
could eat it.
00:39:14
>> You ever crack an egg and then the shell
00:39:15
gets in there and you're tired? You're
00:39:17
like, I'll just eat it. I'll eat the
00:39:18
shell. It doesn't It does not matter. It
00:39:21
doesn't matter.
00:39:21
>> It's cooked. What's going to happen?
00:39:23
It's just a little shell. You poop it
00:39:24
out. You'll grind it up.
00:39:26
>> So, this is the picture of the egg that
00:39:27
was hard boiled at your house.
00:39:28
>> Yeah. So, go to the first picture.
00:39:30
>> Oh my god.
00:39:31
>> Yeah. And that that was sticking out of
00:39:34
the egg. See the one little white hair
00:39:36
right there? There was an opening,
00:39:38
right? And there was a feather coming
00:39:39
out.
00:39:40
>> Oo, I just got the shivers. Ooh. I I
00:39:42
know.
00:39:43
>> I don't know why I'm getting
00:39:43
>> I still ate it.
00:39:44
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:39:45
>> Yeah. Yeah. I still ate it.
00:39:46
>> It's still good.
00:39:47
>> Well, I open it and there's not there's
00:39:48
not like It's not blue. There's not
00:39:50
like, you know what I mean? Cuz if that
00:39:51
happened, I would probably sue.
00:39:53
>> So now, did this make you never want to
00:39:54
hard boil again?
00:39:55
>> I can never cook it again.
00:39:57
>> No more hard boiled.
00:39:58
>> Also, when I opened it, it was all
00:39:59
gooey.
00:40:00
>> You know what I mean? It was all goo cuz
00:40:02
I didn't know how cuz Chachi PD [ __ ]
00:40:04
me up.
00:40:05
>> Why don't just buy them preh hardboiled
00:40:06
>> to be fair.
00:40:07
>> Okay, go ahead, Andre.
00:40:08
>> It is putting an egg on water.
00:40:10
>> Yeah.
00:40:11
>> And boiling the water for 10 minutes.
00:40:13
That's it.
00:40:14
>> That's That's as complicated as you
00:40:17
Okay.
00:40:17
>> You say it like it's easy.
00:40:19
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You say like it's
00:40:20
easy, but when you've never done it
00:40:22
before. And so this is what Chat GTB
00:40:25
said, if I may, if I may argue.
00:40:27
>> Go off.
00:40:28
>> Okay.
00:40:28
>> Yeah.
00:40:29
>> Chat GPT said, "Put it in cold water."
00:40:32
>> Yes.
00:40:33
>> Right.
00:40:33
>> Uh-huh.
00:40:34
>> All three eggs.
00:40:35
>> Yes.
00:40:35
>> Right. Similar to a boil.
00:40:37
>> Yes.
00:40:38
>> Then count 8 minutes.
00:40:40
>> Yes.
00:40:40
>> Okay. I did the same exactly the way
00:40:44
they said to do it.
00:40:45
>> You do 10 minutes instead of eight and
00:40:46
that's it.
00:40:47
>> Right. But the chachi said anywhere from
00:40:50
seven to 10 minutes.
00:40:52
>> So for me it's like oh I'll do pull it
00:40:54
out eight and a half nine minutes.
00:40:55
>> That makes sense.
00:40:56
>> You know what I mean?
00:40:57
>> Yeah.
00:40:57
>> Cuz I want I don't want super hard or
00:40:59
boiled,
00:40:59
>> right?
00:41:00
>> You know what I mean? I want hard
00:41:00
boiled.
00:41:01
>> Mhm.
00:41:01
>> You know what I mean? I don't know what
00:41:02
happens if you overcook it.
00:41:04
>> I don't think anything.
00:41:05
>> Oh, okay. So maybe
00:41:06
>> I don't know.
00:41:07
>> Method.
00:41:07
>> Nothing happens.
00:41:08
>> No.
00:41:08
>> The the fart smell ruminates for longer.
00:41:10
>> Okay.
00:41:11
>> Cuz it will it does make your whole
00:41:12
house smell.
00:41:13
>> All right. So I I can buy hard-boiled
00:41:15
eggs at the store. I think that's
00:41:16
bagged. We get the We get these at the
00:41:18
house. They're
00:41:18
>> Yeah. But I don't know if if they're
00:41:20
processed cuz I get free range.
00:41:21
>> Vital Farms, baby.
00:41:22
>> Great.
00:41:22
>> Okay, good.
00:41:23
>> Ethical eggs, happy hens.
00:41:25
>> All right, that's what I'm going to do
00:41:26
from now on.
00:41:27
>> Ethical eggs, happy hands. Yeah, you
00:41:28
don't need to do it anymore.
00:41:29
>> We had Chinese food the other night, by
00:41:31
the way. Something Chinese food is some
00:41:32
of the greatest food in the world. When
00:41:33
it goes in the fridge, it does something
00:41:35
to the fridge.
00:41:37
>> I don't know what it does to the fridge,
00:41:39
but it makes all the other food smell
00:41:40
like Chinese food. It's imp.
00:41:43
Something in the chemical makeup of
00:41:45
Chinese food doesn't do that with ramen.
00:41:47
Not Indian, not Thai. Chinese food goes
00:41:49
in the fridge. Everything in your fridge
00:41:50
is Chinese food. Now,
00:41:52
>> can I ask you a question?
00:41:53
>> I had a piece of celery. It was Chinese
00:41:54
food. I had I wanted celery celery with
00:41:57
peanut butter. I was eating Chinese
00:41:58
food. It was bamboo for some reason.
00:42:00
>> Yeah.
00:42:00
>> Can I ask you what brand of um
00:42:03
refrigerator we have?
00:42:04
>> I think it's a Subzero.
00:42:06
>> Is that right? I actually don't know the
00:42:08
brand of the fridge.
00:42:09
>> I'm Subzero.
00:42:11
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:42:11
>> I have a Scorpion fridge as well. Oh,
00:42:13
you
00:42:14
>> when you open it, it goes, "GET OVER
00:42:16
HERE."
00:42:17
>> YEAH. YEAH. YEAH.
00:42:18
>> That's what I have. Yeah.
00:42:19
>> Finish him.
00:42:20
>> Yeah. It says that about your meals.
00:42:22
Finish your meals.
00:42:26
>> All you can eat.
00:42:27
>> Yeah.
00:42:28
>> Uh I don't know. I think that's my
00:42:29
fridge. What? What? What? Do you have a
00:42:31
nice fancy fridge?
00:42:31
>> There's a self- circulating thing or in
00:42:33
there or no?
00:42:34
>> Self- circulating?
00:42:35
>> Yeah. Yeah. What does that mean?
00:42:37
>> Just a way that the Don't laugh at mone.
00:42:39
I'm not a scientist. Why are you
00:42:41
laughing at him, Mone?
00:42:42
>> Yeah,
00:42:43
>> I just like the way self- circulating
00:42:44
sounds.
00:42:45
>> You have a mini fridge. You don't even
00:42:46
have a full fridge at your house.
00:42:47
>> You have a little mini fridge. What do
00:42:49
you put in there?
00:42:50
>> His mini meals.
00:42:51
>> Oh, you have mini meals in there. Peanut
00:42:53
butter for sure. Jelly for sure.
00:42:55
>> How does Brad Williams not have his own
00:42:57
brand of mini fridge?
00:42:58
>> I know. You should do that.
00:42:59
>> A self-irculating ground fridge is a
00:43:00
sustainable non-electric cooling system
00:43:02
that utilizes underground temperature to
00:43:03
store food. Similar to traditional root
00:43:05
seller. Oh, do you have one of those?
00:43:06
>> Mhm.
00:43:06
>> Wow, that's very nice.
00:43:08
>> No electricity needed for your fridge.
00:43:10
>> No, I have one. You have
00:43:11
>> Oh,
00:43:12
>> it doesn't circulate.
00:43:13
>> Oh, it does not.
00:43:13
>> Yeah.
00:43:14
>> Oh, that's
00:43:14
>> I think because I'm Asian, I'm I'm just
00:43:16
used to everything tasting like Chinese.
00:43:19
>> Everything always tastes like
00:43:20
>> the old milk tastes like Chinese. Yeah.
00:43:22
>> Do you still put a box of baking soda in
00:43:24
the freezer?
00:43:25
>> Why would you do that?
00:43:26
>> Do you not know about this?
00:43:27
>> No. Tell me everything.
00:43:28
>> So, look, he's nodding. That's a Midwest
00:43:29
thing.
00:43:29
>> You put batteries in the fridge?
00:43:31
>> Batteries you put in the fridge? Yeah,
00:43:32
>> I buy them at the store.
00:43:33
>> But you put them in the fridge. It keeps
00:43:34
them longer.
00:43:35
>> Keeps them longer. They can last a
00:43:36
longer.
00:43:36
>> I buy them at the store,
00:43:37
>> right?
00:43:38
>> You know what I do? Placing an open box
00:43:39
of baking soda in the freezer is an
00:43:40
effective natural way to neutralize
00:43:41
orders preventing food from absorbing
00:43:43
strange smells. It is funny. For some
00:43:44
reason, you just open the box and it
00:43:45
just makes your freezer not smell. It's
00:43:47
old. This is old white people stuff.
00:43:48
It's like putting your
00:43:49
>> I love cuz you know what I
00:43:51
>> You never learned this.
00:43:52
>> Not only that, like I I want to learn
00:43:55
the ways
00:43:56
>> the ways of the whites.
00:43:57
>> The ways of the whites. Yeah. Yeah.
00:43:58
Yeah. Yeah. And this is the first
00:44:00
information you gave me for the way of
00:44:02
the white.
00:44:02
>> I'll give you a couple more.
00:44:03
>> Yeah. So, baking soda in the freezer.
00:44:05
Give me more way of the whites. put your
00:44:07
jeans in the freezer for one full day
00:44:08
and you can get rid of like if say you
00:44:10
go to Vegas, you get
00:44:11
>> Yeah, but what what if I
00:44:13
>> I'm just going to say if you get smoke
00:44:14
on your jeans, cigarette smoke, and like
00:44:15
you say you go to a place that it just
00:44:17
like stinks them up, but they're not
00:44:18
dirty. You didn't sweat in them, but you
00:44:19
don't want to wash them cuz that [ __ ]
00:44:20
up denim.
00:44:21
>> You fold them and put them in a freezer
00:44:23
for like a day, a day and a half,
00:44:25
>> smells gone.
00:44:26
>> Okay.
00:44:26
>> You never put jeans in the freezer.
00:44:27
That's why that's a white people think.
00:44:28
>> Yeah. I wish I would have interrupted
00:44:30
cuz I had a joke.
00:44:30
>> Oh, go ahead.
00:44:31
>> I can't anymore.
00:44:32
>> Please.
00:44:32
>> What?
00:44:33
>> Please. How do I take the jeans out of
00:44:35
my body?
00:44:37
>> Son of a gun.
00:44:39
>> You can't go in the freezer. You're not
00:44:41
allowed. What's other white white?
00:44:43
>> I might have worked when you think or
00:44:46
No.
00:44:46
>> No. No.
00:44:48
>> Okay.
00:44:48
>> What's some other white way of the
00:44:49
white?
00:44:49
>> Yeah. I weigh or the white. Let's talk
00:44:50
about way of the white.
00:44:51
>> Now, is your butter on the fridge or is
00:44:52
your butter on the counter?
00:44:53
>> What
00:44:54
>> is your butter on the counter or in the
00:44:55
fridge? A stick.
00:44:57
>> My butt is inside my my on my body.
00:44:59
Another one. Another
00:45:00
>> another jean. Another jean. Another jean
00:45:03
joke.
00:45:03
>> Pretty good.
00:45:04
>> Special too on the way.
00:45:07
>> Hi, sweetheart.
00:45:08
>> Pete Holmes, everybody. Pete Holmes, how
00:45:10
you doing?
00:45:11
>> How you doing? My name is Andrew Rice
00:45:13
Clay.
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>> I love it. And tell tell them tell tell
00:49:03
them tell them about the purple the
00:49:05
iconic purple.
00:49:05
>> You really want me to tell them about
00:49:06
>> I want you to take them. The purple
00:49:08
>> telling you about the purple button the
00:49:09
iconic purple shop pay button that's
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>> It's time to turn those whatifs into
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ching with Shopify today.
00:49:26
>> That's exactly right. Sign up for your
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That's shopify.com/bfriend.
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Shopify.com/badfriends.
00:49:36
>> Ladies and gentlemen, it's Pete Holmes.
00:49:38
PDP.
00:49:39
>> I'm so happy to be all right. So before
00:49:41
you came, we were talking
00:49:42
>> before you start before you start. Oh,
00:49:44
>> I want to give a shout out to Pete, one
00:49:46
of our oldest friends in the business,
00:49:47
who's a phenomenal comedian, who has a
00:49:48
special right now available out right
00:49:51
now on YouTube.com.
00:49:55
>> YouTube.com. We're going to put the link
00:49:56
in the description down below, but
00:49:57
please go watch Pete special.
00:49:58
>> Please do watch it. Thank you.
00:50:00
>> One of the funniest people on planet
00:50:02
Earth.
00:50:02
>> I really appreciate that. Thank you,
00:50:03
Slamino.
00:50:04
>> Well, you know I mean it. Okay. Ask him
00:50:05
away.
00:50:06
>> Okay. So, um, before you got here, Yeah.
00:50:08
I want to learn the way of the white.
00:50:10
>> You want to learn the way of the white?
00:50:11
Yes.
00:50:12
>> I was coaching him on way of the white.
00:50:13
So, what happened was I brought up I
00:50:15
brought up baking soda in the freezer,
00:50:16
which is a way of that's a white thing.
00:50:17
It's a way of the white
00:50:18
>> in the fridge, you mean?
00:50:19
>> Uh, you can do both.
00:50:20
>> Okay. Very white. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh,
00:50:23
I can go half white.
00:50:24
>> I'm only half white. Okay. That's very
00:50:26
white. Very white. Well, yeah. Yeah.
00:50:28
Yeah. Ginger double white.
00:50:29
>> Ginger double.
00:50:29
>> Ginger double white.
00:50:30
>> What's another way over the white?
00:50:31
>> Double white.
00:50:32
>> Uh, what? Let me guess. You do you
00:50:34
polish your baseball glove?
00:50:36
>> What? Polish is such an insane No, we
00:50:39
oil it.
00:50:39
>> Yeah, you put a band band around it.
00:50:42
Although the Asians are huge in
00:50:43
baseball,
00:50:43
>> the Japanese. Okay.
00:50:45
>> Yeah, I know you're
00:50:48
baseball. What?
00:50:48
>> Koreans love baseball.
00:50:50
>> Nim me one famous Korean baseball
00:50:51
player.
00:50:52
>> Johnny Chan.
00:50:52
>> Johnny Chan.
00:50:55
>> He's so good.
00:50:56
>> He can do anything. Plays for the
00:50:58
Astros. Anything that's a gamble.
00:50:59
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, what is a way of
00:51:01
the white? I want to I want to answer
00:51:02
that question.
00:51:03
>> Well, I'm trying to think stuff like
00:51:05
this. Like um like in penny loafers, we
00:51:07
actually would put pennies in the penny
00:51:08
loafers. That's a way of
00:51:09
>> I was with uh subtle pretty good name
00:51:12
drop Judy Greer.
00:51:13
>> Let me grab this.
00:51:15
>> Do you know who Judy Greer is?
00:51:16
>> Oh, well she was in one of my favorite
00:51:17
Tarantino movies. Is that Judy Greer? Is
00:51:20
she in a Tarantino movie?
00:51:21
>> I don't think so. That's Pam Greer.
00:51:22
>> Oh, that's Pam Greer.
00:51:23
>> Oh,
00:51:23
>> and they are sisters. Pull up two
00:51:25
photos. Let's see.
00:51:26
>> You know Judy Greer from Arrested
00:51:27
Development?
00:51:27
>> Oh, I know Judy.
00:51:28
>> Yeah. Yeah. She's very very funny and
00:51:30
wonderful and and one of my dear
00:51:31
friends. She she outwited me, I think,
00:51:34
with the loafers because if she sees a
00:51:36
penny on the on the street, we all know
00:51:38
if you see a penny, pick it up all the
00:51:39
day, you'll have good luck. You know
00:51:41
that.
00:51:41
>> But then she knew a second verse which
00:51:43
is like, "Put the penny in your shoe and
00:51:45
good old things will happen to you." And
00:51:48
I'm walking around with her and she's
00:51:49
like, "Ah, this penny in my shoe." And
00:51:51
I'm like, "Why do you have a penny in
00:51:52
the shoe? That's that's double white."
00:51:54
Yes. Here's how how are how are the Kore
00:51:57
buying Girl Scout cookies? If I see Girl
00:51:59
Scout cookies for sale, I'm like, "This
00:52:01
is way of the white. I have to buy 12
00:52:03
bucks."
00:52:03
>> We don't do it because of the chemicals
00:52:04
and all. It's the worst made in terms of
00:52:07
unhealthiness. The girl Girl Scout
00:52:09
cookie.
00:52:10
>> NO.
00:52:10
>> OH, YEAH.
00:52:11
>> REALLY?
00:52:11
>> OH, YEAH. It's the most unhealthiest
00:52:12
cookie you can buy.
00:52:13
>> Tell me why. To whom?
00:52:14
>> Sorry. Back real quick. Tell me why.
00:52:16
>> Tell me why.
00:52:17
>> Real quick. BB. BBS. Science. Okay.
00:52:21
Science.
00:52:21
>> Look up Girl Scout cookies if they're
00:52:23
unhealthy because I like eating them a
00:52:24
lot. And I do like supporting little
00:52:25
tiny white girls with their parents.
00:52:27
>> Have Samoa Samoan.
00:52:29
>> I'll only eat Samoas with Samoans.
00:52:32
I have to go to the Pacific Island.
00:52:34
>> All I need is an inflatable chair and an
00:52:36
unreliable mic sound and I'll have a
00:52:39
good time on a Sunday.
00:52:40
>> What does it say?
00:52:40
>> Reports claimed in 2005 safety
00:52:42
allegations claimed trace amounts of
00:52:44
heavy metals like mercury and caramel
00:52:45
delights. Nobody eats those. And
00:52:47
pesticides like glyphosate.
00:52:49
>> Get to the Samoans.
00:52:51
Many flavors are high in saturated fats
00:52:52
containing more than 20% of the daily
00:52:54
value.
00:52:54
>> This is nothing. That's nothing. That's
00:52:55
not I need like lie. It's not sugar.
00:52:58
It's lie.
00:52:58
>> The guardian up top maintains. Up top
00:53:01
maintains. Maintain the cookies are safe
00:53:03
to eat in moderation.
00:53:04
>> You couldn't spell particularly.
00:53:05
>> Just I like that you couldn't spell in
00:53:08
Google into the Google bar.
00:53:09
>> I've done that. You ever you ever you're
00:53:11
in a trance and you yelp yelp.
00:53:13
>> So I was wrong about that. I I will get
00:53:15
them from now on. What about Okay. Okay.
00:53:18
I just went on a talk show and they had
00:53:19
these bars called David Bars. It was
00:53:22
like, you know, David bars.
00:53:23
>> Yeah. So,
00:53:23
>> it's not a white thing.
00:53:24
>> It's not a white thing. Well, well,
00:53:25
don't worry. I'm going to white it up.
00:53:27
>> Okay.
00:53:27
>> I will reliably white this up.
00:53:29
>> Okay.
00:53:29
>> I pay my taxes quarterly. That's pretty
00:53:31
white.
00:53:31
>> Same.
00:53:32
>> Never done that.
00:53:34
>> That's very good.
00:53:35
>> This is so economic tension.
00:53:36
>> You You can see
00:53:37
>> I'm glad I introduced socioe
00:53:41
we'll
00:53:42
>> remind I'll relist.
00:53:43
>> You should tell your business manager.
00:53:45
Do you get really overwhelmed every time
00:53:48
this time of year with a huge payment?
00:53:50
>> Bobby has no idea how much money is in
00:53:51
his bank account at any given time.
00:53:53
>> I would definitely be fleecing Bobby.
00:53:54
Wouldn't you?
00:53:55
>> 100%. I told him a little off the top.
00:53:57
>> His business manager is stealing a
00:53:58
little off the top.
00:53:59
>> I called this man. I called this man.
00:54:01
>> No, don't get nervous. I'm joking. I
00:54:03
don't think they would because they'll
00:54:05
go to jail if they're doing it. They're
00:54:06
not really doing it. Don't really worry.
00:54:08
>> He's about 86 years old. He lives in
00:54:09
Marina del Re. He runs the business out
00:54:11
of his apartment. I've called him. It's
00:54:12
insane.
00:54:12
>> Oh, the business manager.
00:54:13
>> Yeah.
00:54:13
>> Okay. Yeah. I've called him and I go,
00:54:15
"Hey, man. I think we need to fund the
00:54:16
Bad Friends account. We're about to go
00:54:17
back out and we're going to pay for some
00:54:18
stuff."
00:54:19
>> Takes him about a month and a half to
00:54:20
get back to us.
00:54:21
>> Yeah, I love that. Yeah, I love that for
00:54:22
no one.
00:54:23
>> He's like, "I got to go chisel the gold
00:54:24
out of this uh tomb I'm keeping it in.
00:54:27
>> It's Dude, honestly, you're getting
00:54:28
stolen from 100%."
00:54:30
>> Oh, no. Don't worry about that. I want
00:54:32
to keep Bobby Light. I want to keep
00:54:34
Slammy Light. I want to keep Bobby
00:54:35
Light. Look at this face.
00:54:36
>> I don't know.
00:54:36
>> I'm teasing. He's not stealing from you.
00:54:38
He's a reliable, wonderful person. We're
00:54:39
making a joke. It's a comedy show.
00:54:40
>> It's a comedy show. It's a comedy show.
00:54:42
And what it is? David Wars. So, if you
00:54:43
look at a David bar, it says it has 30
00:54:45
gram of protein or something
00:54:47
>> and it has 150 calories.
00:54:50
>> Guess what that is?
00:54:51
>> Impossible.
00:54:52
>> Yeah,
00:54:52
>> that's like chemically impossible. And I
00:54:56
Googled it. I like cuz I had to know. I
00:54:58
was like, are David Bars lying? And it's
00:55:01
like, yes, they have like 300 I don't
00:55:03
know this, by the way. Don't [ __ ]
00:55:05
come after me, you chiseled CEO. You
00:55:07
gorgeous man with [ __ ] muscle tone
00:55:09
from all your
00:55:10
>> impossible to even do that. I I mean
00:55:13
protein itself is pretty high in
00:55:15
calories. That's one of the problems.
00:55:16
>> Well, it's one of actually the benefits
00:55:17
of it if you also
00:55:19
>> I should be asking you you secret
00:55:21
muscle.
00:55:21
>> Can we go back to the way or the white
00:55:23
secret?
00:55:24
How? But first of all, you brought up
00:55:26
that why is that white?
00:55:28
>> Well, that's not
00:55:28
>> I would ARGUE THE WHITE. WHY DID YOU SAY
00:55:31
it's not? I said I'll keep it white just
00:55:33
by being me.
00:55:34
>> Protein bars are inherently a white guy
00:55:36
snack. This is I I do not see
00:55:38
>> I eat them.
00:55:39
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But you cuz you
00:55:40
associate with whites and you're dating
00:55:41
a white. You're
00:55:42
>> How about a gallon of milk on the table
00:55:44
on the dinner table?
00:55:45
>> Never done that.
00:55:46
>> That's the way of the white.
00:55:47
>> Way of the white of the white. I also
00:55:49
can I observe there's an observation
00:55:51
I've had ever since a kid. You guys make
00:55:53
up your own language
00:55:55
>> that we don't understand.
00:55:56
>> Tell me what do you mean?
00:55:57
>> Well, I I saw
00:55:58
>> particularly spelling it correctly.
00:56:00
>> You didn't misspell it. Join join me in
00:56:02
the hot tub.
00:56:03
>> Yeah. May God Raph. Anyway, uh
00:56:07
>> May God Raph. That's gonna be my when I
00:56:09
die
00:56:10
>> at the Laugh Factory. That's what's
00:56:11
gonna be Is that pre-arranged?
00:56:12
>> Yeah, it's pre-arranged.
00:56:14
>> Oh, thank God. Raph, what's our language
00:56:16
that we try to hide stuff from you in?
00:56:18
>> Well, I I first know not noticed it in
00:56:20
the um '7s as a kid.
00:56:22
>> Okay.
00:56:23
>> I saw the movie Greece. I We talked
00:56:25
about this already, right? But I'm going
00:56:26
to say it again because Pete's new to
00:56:29
this. I'm new to this, right?
00:56:30
>> I'm new to this.
00:56:30
>> And I realized that they you guys have
00:56:32
your own language from a song. We come
00:56:35
together like shama shama shamaing ding
00:56:38
dong. That's your own white language.
00:56:41
>> That sounded Yeah.
00:56:42
>> There's a riff here, but I don't want to
00:56:44
risk my career for it. Do it. Yeah. Go.
00:56:46
Oh, no.
00:56:46
>> I want to hear him say Shamala Lama
00:56:48
dingdong again.
00:56:49
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:56:49
>> Yeah. Go ahead. Do it.
00:56:50
>> Is that racist? No.
00:56:51
>> Right.
00:56:52
>> And nobody's saying or thinking
00:56:56
llama ding ding dong. That's your own
00:56:57
language. NOBODY'S
00:56:58
>> SOUNDS LIKE YOU GOT OKAY. THAT THAT WAS
00:57:00
THE RIFF. THAT WAS THE RIFF. THAT WAS
00:57:02
THE RIFF. I WON'T DO IT. I HAVE TOO MUCH
00:57:03
TO LOSE.
00:57:04
>> WE CAN'T EVEN SAY I HAVE TOO MUCH TO
00:57:05
LOSE.
00:57:05
>> WE CAN'T EVEN SAY IT. WATCH NOW.
00:57:08
>> OKAY.
00:57:12
>> Give me
00:57:13
>> Oh, you mean physically.
00:57:14
>> We can't even say it. So that's your
00:57:15
language.
00:57:16
>> We can't even physically say we stole
00:57:18
that from from like jazz and soul that
00:57:20
were making up words.
00:57:21
>> That's right.
00:57:22
>> Oh well, give me a soul SINGER THAT
00:57:23
WOULD SING.
00:57:25
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
00:57:26
>> I MEAN, WE stole that.
00:57:27
>> So black people have their own Here's
00:57:28
White Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
00:57:30
>> What do you What do you
00:57:31
>> That's interesting.
00:57:32
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:57:33
>> You know, I've been
00:57:33
>> Honey Nut Cheerios is a little bit
00:57:34
whiter.
00:57:35
>> Cheerios.
00:57:35
>> Oh, HNC. Cheerios.
00:57:37
>> I think Regular Life is white.
00:57:39
>> Yeah.
00:57:40
>> Not cinnamon, but regular life.
00:57:41
>> Just regular life is white.
00:57:43
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:57:44
>> It's crazy to say. Well,
00:57:46
>> yeah. I I knew you meant the cereal
00:57:47
though.
00:57:47
>> No. No.
00:57:48
>> The whole philosophy of life.
00:57:51
>> Remember that great Seinfeld bit where
00:57:52
he goes, "The goal to call your cereal
00:57:54
life. How about a bowl of almighty God?"
00:57:58
How about that? No.
00:58:00
>> You don't know this? Because if you
00:58:01
don't like it, you can go to hell.
00:58:03
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:58:04
>> Oh my. That's a great bit.
00:58:05
>> Is it?
00:58:05
>> It is a good.
00:58:06
>> You're not sure.
00:58:06
>> I hate it.
00:58:07
>> You hate it. It's one of those BITS THAT
00:58:09
YOU GO, I DON'T KNOW. BUT then you do
00:58:11
like it.
00:58:12
>> Well, how about this?
00:58:12
>> I'm a Wedies guy.
00:58:14
>> Wedies.
00:58:14
>> That's ours. That's ours for sure.
00:58:15
>> Is that your for sure? Cinn Cinnamon
00:58:17
Live. What else do I do?
00:58:18
>> I think I think Wedies is the ultimate
00:58:20
immigrant. Like Like you come to America
00:58:22
and you're like, I'm gonna [ __ ] be on
00:58:24
the Wedies box.
00:58:26
>> I mean that when I say immigrant, I mean
00:58:28
that in the most positive way. Show
00:58:30
Otani.
00:58:30
>> Hm.
00:58:31
>> He's probably on the Witty's box.
00:58:32
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:58:33
>> Marty the Marty Supremacy.
00:58:36
>> Did you guys see the Marty Supremacy?
00:58:37
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:58:38
>> Oh, he was the best. Jason Bourne
00:58:41
Box. I hope so.
00:58:42
>> Who?
00:58:43
>> Show. He's not on there.
00:58:45
>> Golden Grams.
00:58:46
>> I love
00:58:46
>> Golden Grams is white, right?
00:58:47
>> I love Golden Grams.
00:58:49
>> Is that white or anything?
00:58:49
>> It kind of has an eastern flavor. Like
00:58:51
you must get past the Golden Graham.
00:58:54
>> Yeah. Like a gate.
00:58:55
>> Like a what?
00:58:56
>> Look up Golden Graham box. It's in
00:58:59
>> if you said nothing.
00:59:00
>> Yeah.
00:59:01
>> What was it?
00:59:02
>> Because they had they used to have a
00:59:03
brown bear as their mascot. Remember
00:59:04
that guy? Why they
00:59:05
>> never saw him?
00:59:06
>> No, no, no. That's Golden that's uh
00:59:08
Golden uh Can't get enough Super Golden
00:59:11
Crisp. Super Golden Crisp.
00:59:12
>> Golden Crisp.
00:59:13
>> All right. So, I did I get through all
00:59:15
of the way of the whites?
00:59:16
>> No, there's so many more things. I mean,
00:59:18
>> oh, microwaving your coffee.
00:59:20
>> That's a way of the wipe.
00:59:20
>> That's a mom wipe.
00:59:21
>> We've never done that.
00:59:22
>> Mom wipe.
00:59:23
>> Uh changing How about this? Putting gas
00:59:25
in your car before it gets to empty.
00:59:27
That is remarkably.
00:59:28
>> That took my breath away.
00:59:29
>> That is such a white took my breath
00:59:31
away. Okay. I don't even I I don't I
00:59:33
don't even understand what you said. So
00:59:34
say it's slowing me.
00:59:35
>> Gas in your car before it gets to E. You
00:59:38
wait. You wait.
00:59:39
>> It's got to be blinking
00:59:40
>> 100%. The light.
00:59:41
>> No. The way of the white.
00:59:42
>> I've never seen the gas light on in my
00:59:45
car. WOW.
00:59:46
>> MY ENTIRE LIFE.
00:59:46
>> Because can I say this? I fill up gas in
00:59:48
the same way that I wash my car or get a
00:59:50
haircut. It's based on mood.
00:59:52
>> It's mood.
00:59:52
>> I'm in a great mood.
00:59:53
>> Fill it up. Fill it up.
00:59:54
>> Insane. I'm full of it. Fill it up.
00:59:56
>> You know what? My car says one mile
00:59:58
left.
00:59:59
>> That's when I fill it up.
01:00:00
>> What kind of car is it?
01:00:02
>> It's a Hyundai. Make the joke.
01:00:04
>> I won't.
01:00:05
>> It's a great car.
01:00:06
>> Made Did you make the car?
01:00:11
>> You're so good.
01:00:12
>> Clip it. Is this live?
01:00:14
>> Yeah.
01:00:14
>> Do you clip?
01:00:15
>> We edit.
01:00:16
>> Yeah.
01:00:16
>> Yeah, we clip. We're on the top podcast
01:00:18
in the world. I know. I know. I know.
01:00:21
Why? Why do you think I would be here?
01:00:23
the way he said it.
01:00:25
>> Why do you think I would be here
01:00:26
promoting Silly Silly Fun Boy over here?
01:00:28
>> Please watch Silly Silly Fun Boy right
01:00:30
now on YouTube. A re
01:00:31
>> top of the hour here on Bad Friends.
01:00:33
Pete Holmes from Silly Silly Fun.
01:00:34
>> Welcome back to Top of the Hour. It's
01:00:37
10:09 in the P.M.
01:00:38
>> Did you know that's you? It's against
01:00:40
the law. Like because radio used to be
01:00:42
used for like it still is used for like
01:00:43
army and that sort of stuff. You have to
01:00:45
say who you are. That's an old law. Like
01:00:48
if you do like serious or whatever
01:00:50
terrestrial raid not serious they have
01:00:51
to go like W KBBL top of the hour 459
01:00:55
because people would be like in the old
01:00:56
days they'd be like who are you identify
01:00:58
yourself really used it as well.
01:01:00
>> You're cramming up the the frequency and
01:01:02
they'd be like it's oldies 103.3
01:01:05
they have
01:01:06
>> what year is this?
01:01:07
>> That's what I'm saying. That was
01:01:08
>> World War II. Imagine, right? World War
01:01:10
II.
01:01:11
>> Just so you couldn't hear.
01:01:16
>> I will say you guys have a magic. How
01:01:18
come you didn't GET THAT FREQUENCY?
01:01:20
>> YOU HAVE A MAGIC.
01:01:21
>> YEAH, you mean
01:01:22
>> we did. Benedict Cumberbatch [ __ ]
01:01:24
crack the code.
01:01:25
>> Yeah,
01:01:25
>> nice try.
01:01:26
>> You didn't get that frequency.
01:01:27
>> We had a lanky gay crack.
01:01:32
>> I I didn't hear that one.
01:01:33
>> We should have We should
01:01:34
>> Yeah, you should have heard that. So
01:01:35
your Raiders weren't good back then.
01:01:37
>> What?
01:01:37
>> That's another way of the way.
01:01:38
>> What's your key? What is your code?
01:01:39
What's your common go-to code if you're
01:01:41
doing a radio uh impersonation?
01:01:43
>> WKBBL.
01:01:44
>> As if we all have one.
01:01:45
>> Yeah. Isn't that fun?
01:01:46
>> WKQX. I just love WKQX cuz I'd never
01:01:50
>> I literally don't have one.
01:01:51
>> This is a way of the way.
01:01:52
>> This is a way of another way.
01:01:54
>> Being ready.
01:01:56
Is that a good one?
01:01:57
>> I wanted more for a lanky gay cracked
01:01:59
your code like that. None of us saw the
01:02:00
imitation game.
01:02:01
>> I loved it.
01:02:02
>> Yeah. So fun.
01:02:03
>> So fun.
01:02:03
>> But what bragging rights?
01:02:05
>> I got one. [ __ ] big ass army GENERALS
01:02:07
ARE LIKE, "WE GOT A LANKY GAY ON YOUR
01:02:09
CODE." LIKE, HOW FUN IS THAT?
01:02:10
>> HOW ABOUT THAT?
01:02:11
>> HOW FUN IS THAT? THAT THAT GENERAL HAD
01:02:13
TO SHAKE HANDS WITH SOMEONE HE PROBABLY
01:02:15
HAD AN ISSUE WITH in those days
01:02:17
>> and he was LIKE, "GOOD JOB. GOT TO HAND
01:02:18
IT TO YOU." Eating the steak.
01:02:20
>> Yeah. I love it. [ __ ] deal with it.
01:02:22
Mac and cheese with butter.
01:02:24
>> That's a white thing.
01:02:25
>> That's You add a little extra butter.
01:02:27
>> Anything on the mac and cheese box that
01:02:29
says if you want this a little bit
01:02:31
better,
01:02:32
>> butter.
01:02:32
>> That's the way.
01:02:33
>> I use Sriracha. No, that we've we've
01:02:35
co-opted that. That's our
01:02:36
>> Oh, you did. That's yours.
01:02:37
>> Sriracha mayo. That's what we call it.
01:02:39
And you know why?
01:02:40
>> You blend the white with the age.
01:02:41
Sriracha mayo.
01:02:42
>> So you guys took Bill Cosby.
01:02:44
>> We love Cosby. We stand by What if I had
01:02:47
a I open my shirt. It says I stand. You
01:02:50
>> stand with Bill.
01:02:51
>> I stand with Bill.
01:02:53
>> Did you you want to cut that out? We I
01:02:55
don't stand with Bill.
01:02:56
>> You don't need to cut that out. It's a
01:02:57
bit
01:02:57
>> Okay.
01:02:58
>> I don't stand with Bill. I think that's
01:03:00
I also Jeffrey Dmer. Not too hot on a
01:03:02
big fan. But there are some BLs you
01:03:04
take.
01:03:04
>> There are some blacks.
01:03:05
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And you own it. That's
01:03:07
ours. Like Whitney Houston. Not Whitney.
01:03:08
Oh, like the racial draft.
01:03:10
>> You own her.
01:03:10
>> No, not own her, but like this is ours.
01:03:12
>> Claim Tina Turner. Claim
01:03:14
>> Tina Turner.
01:03:15
>> You You claimed her like
01:03:16
>> rolling on the [ __ ] river. She's
01:03:18
everybody's.
01:03:18
>> I know. But the thing is is that she's
01:03:21
>> I know what you're trying to say. What
01:03:22
am I trying to say?
01:03:23
>> You're trying to say it's like that
01:03:24
Chappelle show, The Racial Draft kind
01:03:26
of.
01:03:26
>> Yeah, but the one you're thinking of is
01:03:27
like Alo Black. I'll give you that.
01:03:29
That's probably a white guy.
01:03:29
>> Like Will Will Smith pre-slap was the
01:03:32
ultimate every white person was like
01:03:34
that's our guy. Yeah. Like we liked him.
01:03:36
>> Yeah. That's what you do. You go that's
01:03:38
my guy.
01:03:39
>> Joe Mandy called him. Joe Mandy and Noah
01:03:41
Garfinkle called him Blom Blanks cuz he
01:03:43
was black Tom Hanks.
01:03:44
>> Blom Blanks.
01:03:45
>> Blanks. But then Blom Blanks Blum
01:03:47
slapped somebody.
01:03:47
>> What are you doing?
01:03:48
>> OJ.
01:03:50
>> OJ was Yeah. Yeah. I'm not black. I'm
01:03:52
OJ. OJ.
01:03:53
>> Is that That's what he meant. I'm not
01:03:54
That's what I'm talking about.
01:03:56
>> Yeah. Yeah. George Foreman. How many
01:03:58
grills do I have to sell?
01:04:00
>> Yeah.
01:04:00
>> I'm just like a
01:04:01
>> You guys took him.
01:04:02
>> Oh, we loved him.
01:04:03
>> We loved him.
01:04:04
>> Yeah.
01:04:04
>> Is he dead?
01:04:05
>> Yeah.
01:04:06
>> See,
01:04:06
>> we don't know.
01:04:07
>> We don't know. And we're going to look
01:04:08
it up. And by the way, if he's not dead,
01:04:10
he will be soon cuz this show has
01:04:11
killed. How many people have we killed?
01:04:13
Maybe seven or eight. Truly.
01:04:14
>> Yeah.
01:04:15
>> We speak the pope. Yeah.
01:04:17
>> But but there are some c but there are
01:04:18
some celebr
01:04:21
>> Asians. Celebrities.
01:04:22
>> No, he's alive. 76. And rest in peace, I
01:04:25
should say, when this comes out.
01:04:26
>> Wow. He No, it says he died.
01:04:29
>> He died.
01:04:30
>> Yeah, he died on March 21st. So, in the
01:04:33
time in which I read that and said that
01:04:34
he died.
01:04:35
>> Count it.
01:04:36
>> That's how good we are.
01:04:37
>> Count down it.
01:04:37
>> We took Bork.
01:04:39
>> Bork is dead.
01:04:40
>> No, but we claim Bork.
01:04:42
>> Oh, his Asian.
01:04:43
>> No,
01:04:43
>> as an Asian. What? Where are you on Mark
01:04:45
Paul Gosler? He's part Japanese.
01:04:47
>> Well, we take him.
01:04:48
>> You can have him.
01:04:48
>> You can't have Bork.
01:04:49
>> I love Bork is every weird white person.
01:04:52
>> But I do want I suck his dick.
01:04:53
>> You suck him in part season two. You
01:04:56
mean the college years?
01:04:59
>> Is that the guy from heated rivalry?
01:05:01
>> No. [ __ ]
01:05:02
>> Mark Paul Gosler.
01:05:03
>> Mark Paul Gosler is is the wonderful the
01:05:06
incomparable. I hate to call him Zach
01:05:07
Morris, but that's what you might know.
01:05:08
Say by the bell.
01:05:09
>> Let me see.
01:05:10
>> Say by the bell. There he is.
01:05:11
>> And he's a half Asian.
01:05:12
>> No, he's got I That looks a court.
01:05:14
>> That looks That's a court to me, too.
01:05:16
>> That's a court too low.
01:05:17
>> Yeah. Yeah, it's a court too low. We did
01:05:19
a sketch more Marco Rubio.
01:05:21
>> We did a sketch on my show where he
01:05:22
played Rayu Ryu. Oh,
01:05:25
>> and he because we were like, "Oh, okay.
01:05:27
He's somewhat Japanese, so that's okay."
01:05:29
>> Oh, that I think that's okay.
01:05:30
>> But then he came on and the joke was
01:05:32
>> that I was firing him cuz no one knows
01:05:34
what he's saying. We're like, when you
01:05:36
do the kick thing, it's like, "What are
01:05:37
you saying? I don't like asparagus. I
01:05:38
don't like asparag." Right.
01:05:40
>> Yeah.
01:05:40
>> But he learned the Japanese so well that
01:05:43
it ruined the bit and we had to come up
01:05:44
with another accent.
01:05:45
>> His mother is a tiny ready to go.
01:05:47
>> Indonesian woman. It says he's not
01:05:49
Japanese.
01:05:50
>> Pry PS dry. Mark Paul. I blame him. Why
01:05:52
don't you call me? I didn't know you at
01:05:55
the time.
01:05:55
>> Okay, fair enough.
01:05:57
>> Although, do you think you'd be a good
01:05:58
Ryu?
01:06:00
>> Yeah,
01:06:01
>> I think I would be.
01:06:04
>> Have you seen a picture of
01:06:06
>> Pull it up.
01:06:07
>> Pull up Ryu. This is like me claiming
01:06:09
I'm ready to be Zangief. Like, I don't
01:06:12
think so. We got a good Blanca right
01:06:14
here.
01:06:15
>> Blanca is just a redhead.
01:06:16
>> Oh, I Ryu for Oh, you're right. Ryu from
01:06:19
Street Fighter.
01:06:20
>> You'd be a good You could be I got it.
01:06:23
Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. I I just
01:06:25
>> Yeah. Yes, I would be.
01:06:26
>> You think so? Yeah.
01:06:28
>> Wait, you're looking at the same thing
01:06:29
I'm looking at.
01:06:29
>> Yeah. Yeah, I am looking at because I'll
01:06:31
tell you this. Why
01:06:32
>> you're more of a doulim?
01:06:34
>> You doll seem like a dam to me. I think
01:06:36
I'm more like I'm Chin Lee. Chunley.
01:06:39
>> Chun Lee. I'm Chun Lee. I don't think
01:06:41
you got any shoulders.
01:06:43
>> You don't have the thighs for Chun Lee,
01:06:44
bro.
01:06:45
>> Chun Lee is built. She's got She's got
01:06:46
tree trunks, brother.
01:06:47
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was one of my fir
01:06:49
That's one of the first representations
01:06:51
of thick ticc
01:06:57
not make her but have her invite her to
01:06:59
do the spinning bird kick and couple
01:07:02
couple ask her and couple good pauses
01:07:04
you got yourself a jerk my man
01:07:05
>> you got yourself a heated rivalry my man
01:07:07
>> hey hey stop LOOKING
01:07:08
>> LOOK AT THAT
01:07:09
>> stop looking at the porn aspects of this
01:07:11
okay
01:07:11
>> that is PORNO BLUR OFF BLUR OFF I'M JUST
01:07:14
KIDDING
01:07:14
>> BETWEEN HER AND Jessica Rabbit Jessica
01:07:16
Rabbit for me was
01:07:17
>> Jessica Rabbit Rabbit changed a
01:07:18
generation. Yeah.
01:07:19
>> My brother was in a picture with Jessica
01:07:21
Rabbit. We went to Disney. I guess
01:07:23
that's a Disney franchise.
01:07:24
>> And I picked the one where I'm in the
01:07:26
car and and and Roger Rabbit is flying
01:07:28
out. He picked the one where he's in the
01:07:30
trench coat and Jessica Rabbit. They
01:07:31
impose her over the photo. It's a
01:07:33
picture with Jessica Rabbit, but they're
01:07:35
supposed to be standing so close that
01:07:36
her boobs are pushing up against you,
01:07:38
but he was so shy, bless him, that he
01:07:40
stood at a distance. In the picture, it
01:07:42
just looked like her boobs were
01:07:43
levitating for no reason.
01:07:45
>> HE WAS TOO SHY TO MASH HIM. I LIKE mom
01:07:48
was watching.
01:07:48
>> I sexualized it for 9year-old boys.
01:07:51
>> That's what she was. And April O'Neal.
01:07:53
>> April O'Neal.
01:07:54
>> April O'Neal was the April O'Dal, bro.
01:07:56
Clip it.
01:07:57
>> Clip it.
01:07:58
>> Clip it.
01:07:58
>> Jessica Rabbit. Real fast again so we
01:08:00
can see a photo of her. I mean, she was
01:08:01
stunning.
01:08:01
>> Let's see if we can get this to mask.
01:08:04
>> Big boy.
01:08:04
>> I know.
01:08:05
>> And incredible that actor. What was his
01:08:06
name? That's against her.
01:08:07
>> Bob Hos.
01:08:08
>> Bob Hosk.
01:08:08
>> And then Cool World was like, "Oh, you
01:08:10
like that? How about this with Brad
01:08:11
Pitt?" And we're all like, "Pass,
01:08:12
>> pass." We didn't like it.
01:08:13
>> Pass. It just didn't land. Cool World is
01:08:15
to who framed Roger Rabbit as Dark City
01:08:18
is to the Matrix.
01:08:20
>> Whoa.
01:08:20
>> I mean, what I just love Dark City
01:08:22
though.
01:08:22
>> What I just So is uh Cool World.
01:08:25
>> Yeah, I guess.
01:08:26
>> I don't know. Yeah,
01:08:27
>> Dark City was fun, but it wasn't Matrix.
01:08:29
>> My My cartoon crushes Wilma from the
01:08:31
Flintstones.
01:08:32
>> Nice.
01:08:32
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
01:08:33
>> I was more of a
01:08:34
>> Betty. I'm being real.
01:08:36
>> Wilma's okay.
01:08:37
>> This is why you and I have a good
01:08:38
relationship.
01:08:38
>> I like that.
01:08:39
>> That That looks like a fish.
01:08:40
>> Yeah. Yeah. No, I I always like Drago.
01:08:42
She's sexy.
01:08:43
>> No, she is. Yeah,
01:08:44
>> I think they designed her. And also Fred
01:08:46
looks Asian.
01:08:47
>> Fred in that one.
01:08:48
>> I think in general I always I always
01:08:50
looked at Fred Flintstone. I go, "Oh,
01:08:52
that's an Asian."
01:08:52
>> Fred Flintstone.
01:08:56
>> Fred Bonnie.
01:08:58
>> There is.
01:08:59
>> He doesn't look Asian.
01:09:00
>> Yaba.
01:09:01
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
01:09:02
>> See, if Shane Gillis had been sitting
01:09:04
next to an Asian,
01:09:06
>> no controversy. No controversy.
01:09:08
>> Exactly. Right.
01:09:09
>> It's It's called the Roophole.
01:09:10
>> It's the root hole.
01:09:17
CRIET
01:09:23
>> SILLY SILLY FUN BOY ON YOUTUBE NOW. CRI
01:09:25
IT.
01:09:25
>> WATCH SILLY SILLY FUN BOY ON YouTube
01:09:27
right now with Pete homep.
01:09:28
>> That is an interesting point though. I
01:09:30
don't think he would have been in that
01:09:32
much trouble if I would have been if no
01:09:33
trouble.
01:09:34
>> Yeah,
01:09:34
>> no trouble.
01:09:36
>> Don't you think?
01:09:37
>> I don't remember what he said in the
01:09:38
clip. I don't
01:09:38
>> I don't want to dig into this again.
01:09:39
you. Also, it was like the best thing in
01:09:41
his career was not going to SNL. He he
01:09:43
got to fly as free as he wanted to fly
01:09:45
and then he got to make his own
01:09:46
television show and then became the most
01:09:47
famous comic in the world. So,
01:09:48
ironically, it was a good thing.
01:09:50
>> It wasn't It's not just ironically, it's
01:09:52
it's it's I mean, there's something kind
01:09:54
of lovely about it. I don't know.
01:09:55
>> It's beautiful. He made his own.
01:09:56
>> It's a life lesson, actually.
01:09:57
>> It's a life lesson to have fun.
01:09:58
Nothing's that serious. Silly Fun Boy
01:10:00
right now on YouTube. Everything is fake
01:10:02
and comedy is supposed to be [ __ ]
01:10:04
stupid.
01:10:04
>> Shane did my new faces that I was
01:10:06
hosting.
01:10:07
>> Yeah.
01:10:07
>> And I went up to him. I feel like an
01:10:09
idiot because I went up to him and I I
01:10:10
didn't say like, "You got it, kid." But
01:10:12
it's funny when you're encouraging
01:10:13
someone who's on the precipice of like
01:10:16
stardom and and I'm like, "Oh, I'm being
01:10:18
such a good older comedian." I'm like,
01:10:20
"You got something, man." Like he really
01:10:22
murdered. He murdered. And his set was
01:10:25
really I think this side of the line,
01:10:27
not like over the line, but it was like
01:10:29
edgy and it's like this show, you know,
01:10:31
new face. You're supposed to like
01:10:33
everybody's towing the line. He went a
01:10:34
little long and he did uh I don't know
01:10:37
if you know that bit about like you got
01:10:38
to hand it to the guy that came up with
01:10:40
the Special Olympics.
01:10:41
>> So he did a set and then he was like,
01:10:43
"All right, I'm uh probably shouldn't do
01:10:45
this one, but I'm going to do it." And
01:10:47
he did it.
01:10:48
>> Killed it.
01:10:49
>> Murdered.
01:10:50
>> It was like the sound of a standing
01:10:52
ovation. It's a bunch of idiots. So
01:10:53
like, you know, I'm not idiots, but you
01:10:55
know, it's agents and people that aren't
01:10:57
>> idiots. Yeah, you said it.
01:10:59
>> Beat double it down.
01:11:03
And but they it murdered and I just him
01:11:06
and Jean Marco Seresi both closed two of
01:11:08
the nights that I was there and I was
01:11:10
just like what is and Laura Peak there
01:11:12
were a lot of great people there. You
01:11:14
know these people of course you do.
01:11:16
>> You're at the store.
01:11:17
>> You're at the store.
01:11:18
>> And I like to see you coming around the
01:11:19
store a lot. That's my favorite thing to
01:11:20
see.
01:11:20
>> I've been around. I was there. I went I
01:11:22
kill in the uh the main room and then I
01:11:24
go and do in the original room.
01:11:26
>> You know you know what I do when I'm
01:11:27
bombing?
01:11:28
>> What?
01:11:28
>> My mind goes
01:11:29
>> film it.
01:11:30
>> Film it. Clip it. Dude, what's wrong
01:11:32
with you today?
01:11:33
>> I DON'T KNOW. I WANT IT TO BURN. I WANT
01:11:35
I DON'T I LOVE YOU, BOBBY. All you, you
01:11:38
know what I mean? You just, you know, we
01:11:40
have a rel, you know.
01:11:41
>> I know. I I love you, but I've to I've
01:11:42
said this about you before. When you're
01:11:44
thinking, you look like you're getting
01:11:45
ready to pounce.
01:11:46
>> Yeah. Here's the thing here.
01:11:47
>> And I get defensive and I'm like, I
01:11:49
better make fun of
01:11:49
>> He is in attack mode.
01:11:51
>> No, no, that's not true. That's true.
01:11:52
So, I've had this.
01:11:53
>> Okay.
01:11:54
>> Yeah. I'm not I'm not in attack mode.
01:11:56
>> Look at your hand. Look at your claws.
01:11:57
Your claws are out.
01:11:57
>> You're You're this close to a hidden
01:11:59
dragon. I'm giving myself the note,
01:12:01
Bobby. I love you. I'm going to adjust
01:12:02
my attitude this week, right? I've had
01:12:05
some beefs with three people and in my
01:12:07
mind I'm like, am I the Remember when I
01:12:10
asked I I out loud
01:12:11
>> you said, am I the problem?
01:12:12
>> Yeah. Am I the problem?
01:12:14
>> With all your beefs.
01:12:15
>> Yeah. And and I really
01:12:17
>> common theme
01:12:19
and and that even that little retort you
01:12:22
and I had, right?
01:12:23
>> Do you have beef with me?
01:12:24
>> No, I have zero beef with you.
01:12:25
>> Yeah. So, do you think it's because I'm
01:12:27
about to pounce? No, I think it's Do you
01:12:30
want the true answer?
01:12:31
>> I want the true answer.
01:12:32
>> I come in, I go, Bobby, and I mean this
01:12:34
in the best way. Is it like a wild man?
01:12:36
Like if I had five If the doors of the
01:12:38
elevator are closing, I'm going to go
01:12:39
see Bobby Lee tonight. They get off the
01:12:40
elevator. Who's that? Ah, he's kind of
01:12:42
like a wild man. That's what I would
01:12:44
say. Wow. So, a wild man means you don't
01:12:47
know in the best way cuz entertainment
01:12:48
is surprise. You're always surprising.
01:12:51
So, I do think I go like I want to I
01:12:54
want to see where I'm at with Bobby. I'm
01:12:55
going to send these sonar pings. Is he
01:12:57
Is he kind of Is he grumpy? Is he happy?
01:12:59
Is he silly? Is he funny? What's he
01:13:00
going to do? So I send out these little
01:13:02
tests and then I go, "Oh, I got sweet
01:13:04
Bobby."
01:13:04
>> This is the child of, you know,
01:13:06
>> Yeah. abuse and trauma.
01:13:08
>> Yeah. That's what trauma does.
01:13:09
>> I mean, Dan Levy last night looked right
01:13:11
at me and goes,
01:13:13
>> "I think you have a mental illness."
01:13:15
>> Dan Dan Levy.
01:13:18
>> Dan Levy.
01:13:19
>> You know Dan?
01:13:19
>> The very funny Dan Levy. You don't know
01:13:21
Dan Levy?
01:13:22
>> No, I'm saying which one though.
01:13:23
>> There's two Dan Levies.
01:13:24
>> Well, there's Eugene's son. That's
01:13:26
Eugene Levy. Are you that guy?
01:13:27
>> No. Dan Dan, our friend.
01:13:30
>> He does. He tours it with Melanie
01:13:32
special about.
01:13:33
>> He looked right at me. He goes, "I think
01:13:34
you have a me mental illness."
01:13:36
>> What What was the context?
01:13:37
>> Well, I I
01:13:38
>> Bobby was pissing in his mouth,
01:13:41
>> you dirty [ __ ] I think you're mentally
01:13:43
ill.
01:13:43
>> No, last night the whole night I was
01:13:45
wearing the these types of glasses at
01:13:47
the comedy store
01:13:48
>> and I did the Italian thing
01:13:51
>> all night long.
01:13:52
>> Yeah. If that's
01:13:54
>> I wouldn't stop in the green room. You
01:13:55
know,
01:13:55
>> if that's mentally ill.
01:13:56
>> Hey, that was a good set. David Spade.
01:13:58
>> If that's mentally ill, I'm right next
01:14:00
to you.
01:14:01
>> Okay. I heard that Chris Fleming I
01:14:03
listened to him on Burbiglia's Working
01:14:04
It Out podcast and somebody heckled
01:14:06
Chris Fleming where they went, "Uh,
01:14:09
let's go weird."
01:14:11
And today my wife was on the phone with
01:14:13
her brother and I just kept going,
01:14:14
"Let's go Weirdo." And then I texted
01:14:17
him, "Let's go weird."
01:14:19
>> No, no, no. Just my brother-in-law. And
01:14:21
then I shot a video of my daughter
01:14:23
going, "Let's go, weird out." And texted
01:14:25
it to my brother. Just
01:14:26
>> this is the byproduct of creativity.
01:14:29
Sometimes I'm completely on your side.
01:14:32
>> Shame on you, Dan Levy.
01:14:33
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
01:14:34
>> Levy.
01:14:34
>> Levy.
01:14:35
>> Levy. Shame on you, Dan Le.
01:14:36
>> No, no, no, no. He was kidding. He said,
01:14:39
>> "Okay."
01:14:39
>> He was laughing.
01:14:40
>> Well, so was that shame on you.
01:14:42
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think it was on me,
01:14:43
but I got on my hands and knees. I I
01:14:45
promise I don't have
01:14:46
>> Who are the people you have uh beef
01:14:48
with?
01:14:48
>> Well, here's the thing. Robbie Hoffman.
01:14:50
>> 100%. Big beef. Big be.
01:14:51
>> Yeah. But then later that night she
01:14:52
text. You got
01:14:53
>> Well, she loves you, but there's a
01:14:54
there's a tension.
01:14:55
>> Yeah, but I didn't do anything.
01:14:57
>> It that you sometimes you don't have to.
01:14:59
>> Okay. Eric Andre.
01:15:00
>> That one's real.
01:15:01
>> Yeah. But we're good now. Cuz he just he
01:15:03
just said, "Let's go on tour together."
01:15:04
>> That's right. Again. Same thing. Same
01:15:06
thing. So close to kissing.
01:15:08
>> Yes. Love.
01:15:08
>> Fighting fighting fighting fighting.
01:15:10
>> Love and hate.
01:15:10
>> Yeah. But I I think when we're on
01:15:12
podcast or I'm acting
01:15:13
>> Why did you have beef with Eric?
01:15:15
>> I have no idea. He thinks this happened
01:15:17
which didn't happen.
01:15:18
>> He called me about this. It did happen.
01:15:19
And he ripped your shirt and you got mad
01:15:21
about that.
01:15:22
>> He ripped
01:15:22
>> No, no, no. His beef from 25 years ago.
01:15:25
>> Oh, the original.
01:15:25
>> Yeah. Oh, right.
01:15:26
>> Yeah. Yeah. Aged beef.
01:15:27
>> Yeah, it's aged beef.
01:15:28
>> Wow.
01:15:29
>> It's got a nice layer of mold on it. You
01:15:30
cut that off and you get underneath of
01:15:32
that.
01:15:32
>> Yeah. Yeah. You bury it.
01:15:33
>> It's snow beef.
01:15:34
>> Snow beef
01:15:35
>> from Japan. Have you had snow beef?
01:15:36
>> No.
01:15:36
>> From Japan.
01:15:37
>> Snow beef.
01:15:38
>> It's melts right in your mouth.
01:15:39
>> Oh, wow. Not in your hand.
01:15:41
>> But it
01:15:43
>> Who knew M&M stood for moo and moo?
01:15:46
Okay. I I said stood wrong. You want to
01:15:49
clip that one or no?
01:15:50
>> You can clip it.
01:15:50
>> Put that ONE IN THE TRASH.
01:15:53
>> I LIKE But Eric Andre's accusation is is
01:15:56
that we both auditioned for MAT TV. I
01:15:59
got it. He didn't get it. And he thought
01:16:01
that I changed my relationship with him
01:16:04
that I was kind of standoffish and
01:16:05
weird. I don't remember being like that.
01:16:07
>> Well, how old was he? Nine when he got
01:16:08
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, I I think it's
01:16:10
perception.
01:16:10
>> That was like 30 years ago.
01:16:11
>> I think a lot of times we have certain
01:16:13
perception. Yeah.
01:16:14
>> Right. You'll see somebody have a bad
01:16:16
day, but then you take it personally or
01:16:17
something. You know what I mean?
01:16:18
>> We don't see the world how it is. We see
01:16:20
the world how we are.
01:16:21
>> And now we're on my podcast.
01:16:23
>> Yeah. Yeah.
01:16:24
>> And I just turned this into you made it
01:16:26
bad, friend.
01:16:27
>> Yeah. But that is
01:16:29
>> Is this a good wink?
01:16:30
>> It's a very good wink.
01:16:31
>> I don't like it. I hate it.
01:16:32
>> I don't like when you wink. You're not a
01:16:33
wink guy. You guys are wink. He's a wink
01:16:35
guy. Wink.
01:16:36
>> Who I wink?
01:16:36
>> Do the glasses and show them the wink.
01:16:37
Take the glass off. Look at this wink.
01:16:39
>> Love that wink.
01:16:41
>> Yeah.
01:16:42
>> What? What was that?
01:16:43
>> That's a wink.
01:16:43
>> Are you showing me where the moonshine
01:16:45
is? Are you the [ __ ] You look like
01:16:47
Tucker Carlson right now.
01:16:48
>> All whites look like Tucker Carlson.
01:16:50
>> Not me.
01:16:50
>> Ah, the way of the white.
01:16:51
>> Except the Blancas.
01:16:52
>> Yeah, the Blanca. The Blancas get away
01:16:53
with white.
01:16:54
>> If you hit jab and something happens,
01:16:56
you're a Blanca.
01:16:56
>> Okay. You're If you don't and you're
01:16:58
white, you're a Tucker.
01:16:59
>> What's going on?
01:17:00
>> Okay. I'm going to give you white hand
01:17:01
cuz we just before you came, me and Mone
01:17:03
had white hand gestures.
01:17:04
>> White gestures.
01:17:05
>> What they're allowed to do.
01:17:06
>> Okay.
01:17:07
>> Okay. So, I'm just going to do them and
01:17:09
you you you see if if they're allowed to
01:17:11
do it.
01:17:11
>> Okay.
01:17:12
>> Yeah. That's that's that's our bread and
01:17:14
butter.
01:17:14
>> Okay. That's our bread and butter,
01:17:16
>> right? Right.
01:17:18
>> Still in the zone. You might be a youth
01:17:20
pastor, but yes.
01:17:21
>> Yeah. Yeah.
01:17:23
We invented this.
01:17:24
>> I know you did, right?
01:17:25
>> We did.
01:17:26
>> Like hang loose.
01:17:27
>> Yeah.
01:17:28
>> Yeah. For sure.
01:17:29
>> Now, what about this?
01:17:34
>> You are so funny.
01:17:37
You're a true talent.
01:17:40
>> That is so funny.
01:17:42
>> Like,
01:17:42
>> what about this?
01:17:43
>> That's a no. It's a no.
01:17:45
>> It's a no.
01:17:45
>> And he did that to a girl.
01:17:47
>> He asked for a girl's number. She said,
01:17:48
"I'm a lesbian." And he went like this
01:17:50
to her.
01:17:51
>> That is the funniest.
01:17:52
>> It's insane.
01:17:53
>> That's like
01:17:54
>> I watched it live last night.
01:17:55
>> Yeah. He saw it live last night and I
01:17:57
go, "You're not You guys are allowed to
01:17:59
have
01:18:00
>> What? Was she black?"
01:18:01
>> No. No. It's getting clearer.
01:18:03
>> Yeah. Yeah. It's getting clear.
01:18:04
>> Did you wear a gold medal and you were
01:18:06
on the podium
01:18:07
>> in the 70s?
01:18:08
>> Were you protesting something?
01:18:09
>> I do think movies like Fantastic Mr.
01:18:12
box, which I love, which has the wolf
01:18:13
going like this. I have a frame picture
01:18:14
of the wolf going like that.
01:18:16
>> But this is different.
01:18:16
>> Yeah, BUT IT'S A WOLF.
01:18:18
>> YEAH, it's a wolf.
01:18:19
>> Wolves can do. Wolves can do this.
01:18:22
You're right. Look, Mama Luke. Mama
01:18:23
Luke. They can do whatever they want.
01:18:24
>> Okay. Yeah, you can't do that.
01:18:25
>> You can't do that. Are there other
01:18:27
things that whites can do that I whites
01:18:29
can't do.
01:18:30
>> Let me ask.
01:18:31
>> And gesture wise,
01:18:32
>> you know what I I enjoy as a white being
01:18:34
folded into someone else's culture is
01:18:36
the soul shake. If if if I go here,
01:18:38
nobody's going, "What are you doing?"
01:18:39
>> Yeah.
01:18:40
>> What's a soul shake?
01:18:40
>> Dapping someone up. It's just like a
01:18:42
>> dapping someone up when you when you go
01:18:44
like this.
01:18:45
>> You know what a soul shake is? I don't
01:18:47
know if we should call it soul shake.
01:18:49
>> Yeah, we should not.
01:18:50
>> Yeah, that's like the aonics of
01:18:52
>> right which we learned.
01:18:53
>> Which we learned is look up is soul
01:18:55
shake a bad term.
01:18:57
>> It sounds like it. I think just dapping
01:18:59
someone up is what they say now.
01:19:00
>> Soul shake is inherently back here
01:19:03
>> is not inherently bad or offensive.
01:19:05
>> Yeah. I I've always thought that that's
01:19:07
like when you know that clip of Obama,
01:19:09
he's shaking hands. He's shaking hands.
01:19:11
He's shaking hands and he gets to the
01:19:12
black guy and they and they do that. One
01:19:14
of my favorite clips.
01:19:15
>> I love that. I've seen that.
01:19:16
>> Nature nature.
01:19:16
>> So years ago,
01:19:18
>> yeah, that's just you. It's like, oh,
01:19:19
this guy gets it.
01:19:20
>> Well, I like anything that implies
01:19:21
kinship and if somebody's That's why I'm
01:19:23
saying I know that I'm being folded in
01:19:26
to someone else's culture, but I I I
01:19:28
enjoy that in any way. I'm not trying to
01:19:29
be funny. If I came to your house and
01:19:31
had a traditional Korean meal, I would
01:19:32
really love that. I would be I would be
01:19:34
honored. And I should have said honored.
01:19:36
>> Yeah. Yeah. We also have meatloaf and
01:19:37
chicken pot pie as I understand you guys
01:19:40
love stoopers. I know,
01:19:41
>> but that's me folding you into mine.
01:19:43
>> Or let me ask you,
01:19:43
>> CPP is a white thing. Chicken Pope pie
01:19:45
is our meal.
01:19:46
>> You done with CPP?
01:19:47
>> Uh, you know me.
01:19:49
>> Clip it.
01:19:50
>> I love the CP. Anyway, Pete, it's really
01:19:52
good. Pete, look in that camera.
01:19:54
>> Wait, we have to end on a laugh.
01:19:56
>> Yeah, we have to end on a laugh.
01:19:57
>> Okay, let's try to figure it out.
01:19:58
>> Something funny.
01:19:59
>> You want to do an improv game? How do we
01:20:01
end it?
01:20:02
>> I'm just Look, we just did a whole
01:20:04
section that we were like, we have to
01:20:05
lift that out. Now we're back and Andrew
01:20:07
Santino has to go to a game and Bobby's
01:20:09
pretending that he has to leave despite
01:20:10
his producers.
01:20:12
>> I want to end on something. If not
01:20:16
funny, I'll settle for heartwarming
01:20:18
friendship. Yeah,
01:20:19
>> I'll settle for funny or silly.
01:20:21
>> Yeah.
01:20:21
>> Do you want to play uh
01:20:23
>> I mean some movies end not funny.
01:20:25
>> That's true. What movie? I've seen a
01:20:27
starless. It was like not funny at all.
01:20:30
>> How about we can play a game? We can
01:20:32
play a game that I've I played with Co
01:20:34
Bear. I've played with my wife. It's
01:20:36
called smallest smile. Do you want to
01:20:37
play smallest smile? And we're out of
01:20:38
here.
01:20:38
>> Yeah. How do you play it? Super easy.
01:20:40
You look down
01:20:42
>> and when you come back, you come back
01:20:43
with a neutral face.
01:20:45
>> We're going to go one at a time and then
01:20:47
you do the smallest
01:20:49
smile you can do. It has to be You're
01:20:51
going to be so good at it. It has to be
01:20:54
perceivable as a smile. I'm going to go
01:20:56
first just to give you a sense.
01:20:57
>> I ALREADY KNOW IT.
01:20:58
>> RIGHT into the camera.
01:20:59
>> Yeah. Okay. This is my camera. Ready?
01:21:01
>> This is my camera. So, we we all do it
01:21:02
at the same time.
01:21:03
>> No, no, no. one at a time cuz I want to
01:21:04
watch and I want to enjoy. But I'm just
01:21:06
going to do it so you know. The key is
01:21:08
come up with neutral and then do it.
01:21:10
>> Okay. Here we go.
01:21:10
>> All right. Ready?
01:21:11
>> Right.
01:21:15
>> I'm not going to be able to do it.
01:21:16
>> You're going to be able to do it. I'm
01:21:18
going to give you one direction.
01:21:20
>> Do less than you think. It's almost
01:21:22
nothing cuz that red right?
01:21:24
>> It has to read as a smile but has to be
01:21:26
small.
01:21:26
>> Santino, are you going to close us?
01:21:28
>> Yeah. Okay. Ready?
01:21:31
>> Yeah. It's the point. The point is it's
01:21:33
hard to do without laughing.
01:21:42
>> I love you. I want to see another one
01:21:45
though. Can I see another one? Just
01:21:46
because it's too good cuz smiles are in
01:21:48
the eyes.
01:21:48
>> Oh yeah.
01:21:49
>> It's too good.
01:21:51
>> It's too good what you're doing right
01:21:52
now.
01:21:56
>> It's hard to not do it.
01:21:58
>> It's hard to not give you one more shot.
01:21:59
>> It was very good.
01:22:00
>> No laughing. Less. No laughing. No
01:22:02
laughing. All right.
01:22:02
>> Do And I would say do half as much.
01:22:05
>> Oh, do half as much.
01:22:06
>> Yeah. Yeah. Cuz you got a mustache and
01:22:07
I'm not joking. That highlights the
01:22:09
smile.
01:22:09
>> All right. So, all right. Ready? That's
01:22:11
so funny. Ready?
01:22:17
>> Very good.
01:22:18
>> Very dark.
01:22:19
>> Yeah. Yeah.
01:22:19
>> I loved you in perfect days.
01:22:21
>> Go ahead.
01:22:24
>> Just another harvested.
01:22:27
>> Here it is. Slam Tino.
01:22:34
You get me good. That is so good.
01:22:37
>> That's how you get booked on. That's the
01:22:39
game. And we end it on a laugh. Please
01:22:41
watch Silly Silly Funboy. It's on
01:22:43
YouTube.com. It's website
01:22:45
>> right now. Silly silly funboy. It's on
01:22:47
Pete's uh YouTube.
01:22:48
>> And go to uh Pete.com for my tour dates
01:22:50
and follow me on social.
01:22:51
>> Also say thank you for being a bad
01:22:53
friend.
01:22:53
>> And thank you for being a bad friend.
01:22:57
Yeah.
01:23:03
Yeah.
01:23:05
Woo.
