00:00:00
Hey, I'm on tour. He's on tour. I'm on tour. I'm doing some dates. I'm gonna be at uh Tempe. I'm gonna be in Brea. Uh I'm doing a bunch of casino runs in Southern California. I'm doing
00:00:13
the Borgana in Atlantic City. Uh I'm going all over the place. Go to andino.com for those tickets.
00:00:19
Andrewsino.com. Say Andrews.com. Andrewsino.com. Type the tickets. Go to the tickets. San Francisco. I'm
00:00:25
coming to you, too. I'm going all over. Andrewantino.com. You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots?
00:00:31
A white dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. You two are something. We're bad friends. So, I gave you $100 to go to We Spot.
00:00:42
Why? Because you're sleeping in the studio because your apartment there's some sort of disaster happen. There's lead in the walls.
00:00:48
Yeah. How do you even know that, dude? What are you, Superman? I didn't. Can you see through the walls at home? Wait, wait. Can Superman see through
00:00:54
lead or he can't X-ray vision? He can't see through lead, I don't think, though. What do you mean he can see that there's lead in the walls?
00:01:00
That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Superman cannot see through lead. That's what I'm saying. I just told you
00:01:05
that. How can he not see through lead? I know. Out of all the things, lead. I can see through lead. The guy can is faster than a [ __ ]
00:01:12
train. Yeah. He can jump over a building that's 50 stories high. He can't see through lead.
00:01:17
Yeah, I know. Give me a break. He can see through copper. But lead is known for its density and ability to block X-rays. That's why lead
00:01:23
aprons are used in medical settings to prevent patients and Superman from coming in and taking over a small
00:01:29
business. And Lex Luthor probably is a fortress or whatever his little compound full of lead. Full of lead.
00:01:34
Yeah. Anyway, um I gave you $100. I don't know why we got Oh, the lead at your apartment. And what I'm going to say is then I said to go sleep at Wi
00:01:41
Spa, which is a Korean spa in Korean Korea Town. Open 24/7. It's a nice spa. There's a restaurant. There's a bunch of facilities. Dry sauna workout. They're over 5'8. It's hard to sleep in those
00:01:53
beds. Yeah. I'm just telling you why. Because they're short. They're for little Asian.
00:01:59
They're not made for full-sized adults. That was the big issue. But you also had an issue with the cleanliness of it. Or no. Or no. It's a
00:02:05
very clean place. I don't know. It's just a thing about like cuz you are naked. Being naked with
00:02:10
a bunch of strangers in like a soup like hot tub is just very It's odd. Soup. That's what it felt like. Like I never get I never I never went to caner. Can I get the we spa soup?
00:02:23
That's what I felt like I was a boy. Like what are you talking about? It's water. You would have never lasted a day in
00:02:28
ancient Rome. We used to do that all the time. Remember back in the day back you and I dude
00:02:34
love and we mixed it with other species. Oh yeah. There were there were monkeys running around. We
00:02:40
don't care dude. Yeah. Yeah. Hey honestly this is my problem with this though. He says he goes he can't he
00:02:47
the bed's too small. blah blah blah blah. And I said, "I already offered you to sleep at the house multiple times." Your house.
00:02:53
Turn it down. Yeah. Oh, he showers at my house. He showered there a few times already. And I said, "You're more than welcome, dude." But he
00:02:59
I think he likes the sadness of sleeping at the studio. I don't want to inconvenience any I like being able to come and go at my own.
00:03:05
Well, that's that's really what it is cuz you know you're allowed to at my house. He just doesn't he feels like he
00:03:10
doesn't want to I don't want to intrude. I know. It was it reminds me of this when I was struggling for a very long
00:03:18
time in this business. I knew I had f you know you you know headliners are millionaires. Yeah.
00:03:23
Right. But like you can't pay rent, right? So like should I call so and so? And I was
00:03:28
always so I only call my parents. Well, cuz you're afraid of inconvenience. I think that's what it is. Yeah. But also you're like they don't want me
00:03:34
in the house. I'm I'm just a pig. And it's fine here. I like the couch. And then Mensia would like bro [ __ ]
00:03:40
again dude. like every 3 days. He's 500 bucks, bro. But what the [ __ ] bro? Well, you're struggling. Yeah, I was struggling. He's making 500 bucks a minute. Paulie, never. Dude, you just It's a
00:03:53
part of your story, dude. Not eating, dude. It's a part of your story, bro. He's right. Right. And I'm like, okay, I won't eat. One time he I heard a story from Sandy Danto. Did I tell you this story on
00:04:04
here? Yeah. That Paulie one time they went out for lunch. They went out for Subway when they were on the road together. I have some stories, too. Yeah, go
00:04:09
ahead. They were for they went out for a Subway and Paulie goes uh Sy's like we'll take like an Italian foot long and
00:04:16
Paulie goes smart dude half now and eat the other half for dinner. Eat the other half for dinner. And he
00:04:22
didn't. And then Sandy was like kind of wanted the whole thing now. And he was like, "Nah, dude." Yeah. Half now, half later.
00:04:28
I used to go on the road and go, "Dude, it's your time to pay, dude." No. Yeah, dude. I'm like, "Where are we
00:04:34
going?" "Pot belly." Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Sandwiches, bro. Why don't we go to CVS? We'll just get
00:04:39
some snacks. But he was always gracious and I love Paulie. But um another time I already told you the Jamba Juice story, right?
00:04:44
Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We've already said that many times in this part. Yeah. Yeah. And I got to say it again though. Say it.
00:04:50
Young young Bobby were at in San Diego and Jamba Juice had just come out. Big deal.
00:04:55
Big D. Jamba Juice was like a Lord of the Rings movie. Really? It was People waited in line. Waited in line for Jamba Juice. Dude,
00:05:02
it was unreal. And we were there. He's like, "Dude, follow me." And we went right to the front. So big. That's a big deal. Jump
00:05:09
the line at the juice. But he was also there was no internet back then. He was also a very big star. Oh yeah.
00:05:15
Yeah. Yeah. You could just do that. I think I would never do it. I would wait in line. He's still so famous. Yeah. And they're from St. Louis Abyspo.
00:05:21
They're from the slow, baby. But what happened? You jumped the line. We jumped the line. And I was so I was
00:05:27
blushing. Yeah. Because I'm like, dude, this is like moral like ethically wrong. Yeah. To cut all these people off.
00:05:33
But no one complained and we just got it. So maybe I don't know. Now, they made a drink called The Weasel for a while. Yeah. Yeah.
00:05:38
It prompted them up. Yeah. The Jamba Juice line. Uh, you know what? I went to go see the other night.
00:05:43
I texted you. Let me guess. I told you. Jesus Christ Superstar. Of course. At the Hollywood Bowl. At Hollywood Bowl. Did you really go? No. What? No. Jesus is my heart. I don't need to go to the Hollywood Bowl.
00:05:54
What did you see? I went to go see Naked Gun. Was it? Let me go ahead. Well, the shirt's great. It's fun. It's fun. You know, it's so funny because as a comic that must be
00:06:06
hard because it's all jokes. Well, what bums you out is you're like, why wouldn't they cast a [ __ ] comedian instead of Liam Niss? Because
00:06:12
Liam Niss's playing Taken the whole time, you know? Oh, right. Which is okay, but like Leslie Nielsen
00:06:19
was so [ __ ] unbelievably funny. He was also an actor who I know, but Leslie was a had comed his
00:06:25
comedic timing was unmatched. So, let's cast it now. Who would you do as a comedian? I just talked about this. I said it with
00:06:31
Steve. Steve Martin would have [ __ ] hit an absolute home run. Exactly. A literal home run at that. Yeah. He also has the white hair. He's got
00:06:36
that It' been a great, beautiful character comparison because Steve plays the straight guy so well for so many
00:06:42
years. Yeah. And the thing about that character is Leslie played an unbelievably dense
00:06:49
straight guy. Like a dumb straight guy, but he sold you on all of it. Yeah. because it was quick and he threw
00:06:55
it away and it was so you would I remember watching the original Naked Gun and re-watching to to
00:07:00
catch jokes cuz I didn't I don't think I missed one joke in this and I'm not saying it was bad. It was just like it
00:07:06
that it the you know you just have an affinity for that old thing. It just felt so different when I saw it for the
00:07:12
first time back then. The best was Airplane. Same thing. Same thing. Same same rhythm. I hope they never remake that movie.
00:07:18
Oh, they're definitely they're doing it now, I'm sure. Oh my god. But Pam Anderson was [ __ ] great. But
00:07:23
the Tomato Meter 91, that's amazing. No, it's really good. It's doing well. I don't know financially how it did in the theaters this weekend because I don't
00:07:30
know how many people are buying tickets, but it's important we do as comedians. We need to support comedies in theaters. They'll do another one.
00:07:36
I think they'll do another one. If this hits 60 million, they will. Yeah, they will. It might. I think it will.
00:07:41
Worldwide. Yeah, we need that, dude. We need more comedy. The Mexicans love it, too. Hey, bro. Hey, bro.
00:07:47
Nick and gone, dog. Yeah, that OJ joke was good, bro. The OJ, by the way, the OJ joke was good.
00:07:53
Yeah. Yeah. The OJ joke was good. And and and but they gave away some of their good jokes. I will say they gave away a few too many
00:07:59
of their of my of good hitters, right? In the previews, which is fine. Yeah. But then I saw a couple of previews for movies that I do want to see. The I Let me guess. Huh. The Paul Thomas Anderson one,
00:08:11
of course. Yeah. Yeah. It looks so good. The Arnowski one. Yeah, it looks good. Looks good.
00:08:16
Yeah, it looks good. I'm going to see it no matter what. based on those posters. Let's see what I want to see here. Um,
00:08:22
Tron. Nah, but you know what? A, but Avatar Fire and Wind or whatever that's called. What's it called? Uh, fire and ash. Ash.
00:08:32
Far and wind. Avatar far and wind. I think I said fire, but okay. You said far. Yeah. Look at that wind over there. It's so far. How far is that wind? Yeah, pretty far. But we can get on a
00:08:45
blue horse and get there. I don't know what they I don't know what they are. What What are What are those things?
00:08:52
Well, I want to see their They've remade Running Man, which I absolutely It looks so good. But when James Camera showed Fire and
00:08:58
Ash to his wife, apparently she cried. Really? Yeah. She said it was a masterpiece. Okay. And then there's my movie's coming out. I didn't see a preview for it yet.
00:09:09
What? Now you see me, now you don't. There you go. You're in that. Looks good, though.
00:09:14
Yeah. Yeah. It looks good. Yeah. Yeah. exciting. Better than Borderlands much. But the point is, yeah, the point I'm trying to make. What is the point?
00:09:25
This is an open window for us to start trying to make comedies again. I know. We're try. We got to try.
00:09:31
We got to try. We really do. A Bad Friends movie. And what is the movie? Well, can I just say something? I have a
00:09:37
new idea. Okay. You know that whites only town that they made in the Ozark? All right. No, listen.
00:09:43
I tried to move there. I know. So, the movie is about you having a whites only Ozark town. Just listen. All right. But I right open an all Korean Ozark
00:09:54
town next to you. Right next to right on the border, right? And for some reason, it's like I
00:10:00
broke back and we fall in love. Why is it again? Yeah. It always goes to I have to fall in love with you. I know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, basically, you know, I mean, we we we have a
00:10:11
meeting, right? I go, this is the boundary, right? Yeah. But one day you're like doing something in the fields. I'm on the fields and we
00:10:17
lock eyes and we go to the boundary and we just start talking and then we don't know what to do. There's an invisible fence. We can't go
00:10:23
through. Oh, like Okay. Yeah. Like like now you see me. Yeah. Oh, you want to put magical element?
00:10:29
Yeah. All right. It's got to be magic. Wait, honestly, that is a good start of like that whites only town. What is it
00:10:36
called? Yeah. What's the name of that stupid town? It's only whites only. Yeah. And it's in uh it's in
00:10:41
Arkansas. They're called Return to the Land is their They're called The Crew is called the Return to the Land.
00:10:47
Something happened for them to drive him out there. You mean they did something? No, they had an interaction somewhere in
00:10:55
their life. Yeah. Something happened. You know what I mean? Where you know they were like, "Nah, [ __ ] this."
00:11:01
Well, here you go. Let's see. Inside the whites only town in Arkansas. You don't Jews, no gays. No blacks, no Jews, no gays, no problem.
00:11:09
Pushing houses. But it says no. It doesn't say no Asians. No, they said gays. Start it over. Let me hear it again. Yeah. No blacks, no Jews, no gays. High up in
00:11:22
the Ozark Hills in the state of Arkansas, dozens of people have been working hard building houses.
00:11:28
Why is it with a British accent, no blacks, no Jews, no gays? Why is it? It's something about it. Okay, go ahead. They're building a new community. It's called Return to the Land and it is a
00:11:39
town open to white people only. They are millennials and Gen Z and this is a new
00:11:44
update of age-old prejudice. What we've done here is establish a place where we have even the dogs white and that is just for the sake of you
00:11:57
know our culture and that that culture effectively we're saying this is a white culture a white
00:12:02
place white American culture but what this sounds like is bringing back segregation is that a fair assessment it's free association
00:12:13
so we're not trying to keep other people down. This is a small settlement in the
00:12:19
middle of the Ozarks, but they are being kept out even if of well, I mean, you don't let everyone
00:12:25
into your home. Around 40 live here, hundreds more across the world have paid to be members. And while the men do the physical labor, the women take care of the children who live here full-time.
00:12:37
That's right. Very loving community. if you're part of a community, but if you're black, if you're Jewish, or if you're gay, you
00:12:43
can't be part of that community. They can have their own communities, and they already do. You might be wondering how any
00:12:49
next to yoursal. You'll see. Return to the land is structured as a private members association, which they
00:12:55
believe allows them to discriminate on the basis of ethnicity along with other factors.
00:13:00
This is the movie, dude. Yet to be This is our movie and may well fail. The Arkansas Attorney General has said his
00:13:06
office is now reviewing the matter as a result of our reporting and that there is no room for racial discrimination in
00:13:12
Arkansas or anywhere. Okay. Can I just say this? First of all, there seems to be a little bit of room for discrimination in
00:13:18
Arkansas. They got a plot of land. No, but but here's the here's the most [ __ ] up part about all this. Yeah. Is
00:13:28
this is honestly already a great movie. Like it's already a movie. You know what it is? What?
00:13:34
This is like white guys instead of white girls. And then we just get they go in like they go in full on
00:13:40
white like Juski. Yeah. Like go undercover as full white. Hello, I'm Cliff Stevenson.
00:13:47
I'm an accountant but I'm retired. Have you ever seen like an albino black guy? Like an imagine albino black guy
00:13:52
like he's That's what it is. Uh one of the weigh-ins plays an albino black guy that goes in there and tricks them into
00:13:59
thinking that he's white. Yes. Right. like this guy and he infiltrates he infiltrates the world. I want to be that guy. You can't play him. Why you his eyes? You he could be Asian.
00:14:11
Oh yeah. Yeah. You play his Asian buddy. Yeah. I got to be Cliff Stevenson, though. I'm Cliff Stevenson.
00:14:16
Yeah, dude. I mean, this is such a wild What were you going to say? The art. This is a It's an interesting.
00:14:23
I wonder if you just kind of wandered in. Hey guys, if you wandered in. No, wouldn't work.
00:14:29
But then I don't think they would shoot me. They did say no blacks, no Jews, no gays. They didn't say anything about
00:14:35
Asians, though. That's what I said. Yeah. I mean, why don't you know that isn't Maybe I'm allowed. Maybe you are.
00:14:40
Yeah. Make my eye. I don't know. You do smelling salts before you walk over there. That is interesting. Um, but you know
00:14:52
what? I want to visit. We can buy the other property around it. See, this is what's really cool. If you really wanted to be a boss,
00:14:58
like if you were a black a black company, Yeah. you would buy all the land around it.
00:15:03
That would be [ __ ] wild. You really want to put these guys out. And by the way, you'd buy all the land around it
00:15:08
except for one little strip of road that goes in and out, but you control the road. And then you do a gigantic Travis Scott
00:15:15
concert, right? Free. Imagine on the border just thousands of Wait, it's just every single day a new black artist is performing. Yes. Yes. Yes. Every single day.
00:15:27
Yeah. Yeah. That would be amazing. By the way, every musician would do it for free. They'd be like, "I'll perform
00:15:33
there for free." That's so That's such a good idea. And then on the outside of the of the black
00:15:38
outside ring, an Asian outside ring, then a gay ring, then a Jew ring. Oh, and you you form a rainbow.
00:15:46
That's what they always wanted. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You go and you would see a rainbow maybe.
00:15:51
Right. Right. and their message would finally be clear that we are actually all one. We're all one. We're all just one.
00:15:58
But I'm telling you right now, I bet you money you put Michael be Jeep. Michael Jeep Jordan.
00:16:04
Beep beep. It's Michael Jeep Jordan. I got Beep Beep. Beep beep. It's Michael Jeep Jordan.
00:16:14
Michael Jordan. But I bet you money you he Dude, can someone at home draw a picture
00:16:20
of a Jeep with Michael B. Jordan's head on the front of it. Michael Jeep Jordan. Michael Jeep Jordan.
00:16:26
What if he what? Okay. Oh, if he tried to get in. No, but if he just wandered, I bet you one of those girls would be like,
00:16:32
"He's so hot. He's He's so hot. They're letting that guy. They have to." She would sneak into the
00:16:38
woods. Where you going, honey? I'm just going out to get milk. There's goat milk out there. Oh, whatever. She would No,
00:16:44
I thought you said adult milk. I thought that was great. Oh, adult going there to milk an adult. Yeah. Michael Jeep Jordan.
00:16:51
Beep beep. Dude, look at that. Keep your shirt on. He's got the top down there. Yeah. God, is that automatic or stick? Michael
00:16:57
Jeep Jordan. That's He's got a big stick shift. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Vroom vroom. [ __ ] up. Michael Jeep
00:17:04
Jordan. I had a slip up. No, it was great. We love a Michael Jeep Jordan. Yeah. Yeah. How funny if we got to meet him one day and he's like, "What's up? It's Michael Jeep Jordan." Oh, yeah. That'd be great.
00:17:14
If Michael B. Jordan or Idris Ilba [ __ ] walked over there with that accent, they'd be like, "Okay, come on.
00:17:19
Hey, [ __ ] right. That's the, you know, that's going to be it. They're going to be like, "Why only except for some people that we really
00:17:24
admire?" Yeah. Or Tory Thor Tony Thornberg. That's my Asian. Tony Thornberg. Yeah. Yeah. Who is that? Oh, wait. Wait. Don't be But don't Oh. Oh. Oh, right. You know, right. That's my crush.
00:17:36
Yeah. Yeah. This is your crush. I forgot about it. That's my half Asian crush right there. Tony Thornberg. Can Tony be a part of it?
00:17:41
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Tony's got to be there, dude. So, this is it. We send in the hottest the hottest minority of every race. Yeah. infiltrate the all
00:17:48
white land. Exactly. It's a great idea. It's great. See who can break through. It's basically there's an M Shamalan
00:17:55
movie. Yeah. And at the end we reveal that the whites are all aliens. They're all lizards. It's the might Yeah. It's a Might Shalam Ding-Dong movie
00:18:05
featuring Michael Jeep Jordan. Yeah. I think let's come up with a different switch here.
00:18:11
No, the the whites were always minorities. They were Oh, no. Oh, well that's it. Yeah. We pan out to realize the whole
00:18:17
world is minorities and the whites are or Yeah. The whites are actually the minority. Wow. That's it. They're the only ones.
00:18:24
They're the 40 whites left left on earth. That's the switch, dude. Right. Wow. That's good.
00:18:31
Where in America is a This is That is crazy though to think that uh they so they can they can do this because they set up a private institution, right? So then it's like a it's like saying I have
00:18:41
a club, you can't belong. And then they just say, "I'm allowed to accept people that I want and they're only right." Like a like I can't walk into a VFW,
00:18:49
right? I can't I'm not part of the club. You can. No, I'm just saying I'm agreeing with you. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:18:55
So then that's how they're getting away with it, right? They're just saying you can't be. But also, what [ __ ] black person or gay or Jew wants to live
00:19:02
there? They don't want to live there. You don't even need to publicize it. Just be like, "We're going to the woods."
00:19:07
Yeah. Just go to the [ __ ] woods. Yeah. No. No one's going, "Can I go?" Like no black guys is like, "Dude, I'm
00:19:14
trying to get there. It is pretty out there. It's 40 people and peaceful. There's so much land all they could go.
00:19:19
People if they want if people want to move to the sticks, people can move anywhere to the sticks." Yeah, but if I wanted an all Korean
00:19:25
community, why can't I have one? You have one. It's on [ __ ] Wilshire. You going down there?
00:19:30
Yeah, I know it is. But I'm just saying like if I was like, you know what, I just want to be around a bunch of Koreans and we live live in a community.
00:19:36
Why would that be controversial? You're I know what you're saying and you're right, by the way. No, being real. No, you're being anti-woke and I like
00:19:43
it. No, I'm not being anti-woke. I'm just saying my family and some dude was like,
00:19:48
"Hey, I don't know you. Can I come?" I think the I think you can if it's it's as if I think what they're what the
00:19:55
ah I see what you're saying. What the attorney is saying is that you cannot keep people from coming out there
00:20:01
just based on race, creator, religion. But that being said, you just own a bunch of land. Like if
00:20:08
you owned a 100 acres of land. Yeah. You could say, "I'm only letting people in there that I want in there."
00:20:14
Yes. That's what I'm saying. The problem is they were too forward with it. Shut your mouth. Just say, "Shut the [ __ ] up.
00:20:19
Say we're creating a private community and only we can be in there. Who's we? Whoever we choose." Yeah. Just be koi about it.
00:20:24
Yeah. Or make up a lie, you know? We're We have We had some really [ __ ] up religion.
00:20:31
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, they by the way something is brewing over there. There's something going on. You know they're starting something.
00:20:36
I know, right? You know the You know the crux of this that I It was a dead giveaway that this is like something else. It's a
00:20:42
membership so you have to pay. Yeah. So obviously something is brewing, right? I've got the movie actually.
00:20:48
What is it? I have the new Switch. So basically it's kind of hacky but it's they're out
00:20:55
there, right? And the kids they have no idea there are blacks or Asians or gays in the world. They get older, right? And
00:21:04
then they and then it's a horror movie for them, right? So, one kid wanders out, right? I
00:21:10
was like, "What's up, dog?" Reverse Get Out. It's reverse Get Out, dude. Get in. Get back in. It's Get in. It's Get back in. Cuz once you leave the
00:21:21
community, you're lost in the woods. Yeah. Or some guy, you know, I run into them. They're like, "What happened to your eyes?"
00:21:28
Right. I'm like, "What do you mean?" Yeah. I I saw a man who was disabled. His eyes Something was wrong.
00:21:34
He was quick. Yeah, he was quick and very soft skin. From director Michael Jeep Jordan
00:21:42
comes a revolutionary film. Get back in. Get back in. Yeah. Get back in. Yeah. Hello. You may have heard of HelloFresh. They send chef crafted recipes and fresh
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see dkg.co/audio. Talk space. You know, um, we went down in volume. Did you notice
00:24:24
that? You know why? Cuz we're talking to the fans right now. We're talking to the fans who need to talk.
00:24:29
Exactly, dude. And let me say something, okay? If you have trauma Yeah. You I know you do.
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Yeah. You too. Yeah. Bad stuff, right? You need to do EMDR. You need to someone to talk to, you know. I mean, you know, and and
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00:25:58
Yeah, that's interesting though. Yeah, it's a fascinating fascinating fascinating thing to move down to the Ozarks and do that.
00:26:03
But if you' never seen a minority, if I was you're white, right? Yeah. If you're white, McCone's the
00:26:09
whitest. I'm not according to the So McCone, let's say you grew up, you don't know anything about Asians, blacks, gays, or anything. And then you
00:26:15
finally run into one. What do you think your reaction would be? Fear. Curiosity. That's what I'm saying. I think a lot of people are that. Mm-m. What do you mean?
00:26:27
Andress isn't Andre saw a black person for the first time as like a teenager and he like screamed and pointed.
00:26:34
Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Spain. Spain. Yeah. But so you would be curious European versus American thing.
00:26:40
Yeah. But you have never heard of him. You No one ever talked to you about it. saying if you remove the context of life
00:26:46
that you've lived around other races and people you've never seen it before or known it before. It's like uh it's like
00:26:52
um if I go to rural China today, there's no way they've seen a [ __ ] ginge. Yeah. They're all going to be like, "Uh-huh." They're going to be shocked. I don't know about that. 100%.
00:27:04
100%. When have they seen? Maybe. Maybe. Ah. Yeah. Yeah. I think though even if it's not even if
00:27:11
you like see like and this might be a weird comparison but if I were to see like an animal I don't know
00:27:17
my first I have to I'm going to like if I see like I don't I've never seen a shrew before like I see a shrew I'm like
00:27:24
oh I want to go pet it. What race of people are you comparing? Yeah. This is a Are you saying Middle Easter? What are you saying dude? What are you saying dude specific?
00:27:35
Yeah I say I see a panda. I I think I think animal creatur living creatures. Wait, wait, wait, wait. You wouldn't think if you saw like a Asian person that that was a
00:27:47
humanoid. Well, if there's another humanoid that looks slightly different than me, but not this
00:27:53
guy. There's another animal. I would imagine if you never saw anybody that didn't look like you
00:27:59
truly genuinely, right, for the first time. Yeah. Your instinct is threat for sure
00:28:04
as a human species. I I bet you it is. In fact, it for certain is because I bet you
00:28:10
Shaquille Shaquille O'Neal. Yes. If I'm No, just listen. If I'm around little Asians my whole life and one day I'm just like, you know, I mean, walking through the forest, minding me my own business.
00:28:20
Kajira Kajira. I mean, he's so big that I would probably go, "Oh my god." Like, look at that. That's me. That's That That's even Is that Mr. Worldwide?
00:28:33
Yeah. Who's Kevin Hart? Shaquille O'Neal. Give me that photo. It's insane. Look, that's that's Gabby
00:28:39
Douglas and him. Yeah. Imagine. Yeah. So, imagine that's I'm Gabby Douglas. That's Shaquille.
00:28:44
Mhm. I would be kind of scared, I think. Threat. Yeah. Because you think it's not the color of his skin. It's the size.
00:28:50
Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. It's the size. Yeah. Yeah. Yao Ming. Same thing. No, there's Yao. Wish Wishack.
00:28:56
Yeah. Yao's bigger. No, but if you saw Yao and he looked like you would just think it's an inflated version of you. You just think
00:29:02
somebody pumped him up all the way. No. Wait, let me think. If you saw The point I'm making is
00:29:08
I would think it's like, you know, you know what I mean? Like somebody's on the shoulder. There's two kids in there.
00:29:13
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But the first time any race ever saw another different race from their people, I'm sure they were freaked out
00:29:19
and thought it was a threat for sure. But you know what? White people always white people always people go, "Oh, beautiful white." Like in Africa and
00:29:25
stuff, they follow them around. It's an angel. Right. But with me, it's like probably not.
00:29:32
Well, what you like you're like an angel whose wings have been clipped. Yeah. Like that island. You know that island where that Christian died where they went to go try to Yeah. So there's one dude I think it was Asian
00:29:45
even. This this is great point that we're bringing up by the way. Oh, the Sydney Sweeney. The jeans. The jeans. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:29:51
I didn't get I didn't get it. I don't get it either. But people are mad. I know because she's saying, you know, the the
00:29:58
play on words that she has great jeans in her jean pool. Why? It's the It's not even her saying it, right? It's the ad company. Well, she says it, but I mean, she's
00:30:08
just reading copy. Reading the copy. Yeah, we read copy all the time. Yeah. Yeah. Wait, but but what is it? Mone knows.
00:30:15
He's young. He gets like a is like a eugenics thing. Exactly. I have blue eyes. She says that, right?
00:30:21
Yeah. Eugenics is the is the idea and look up the definition, but isn't eugenics the idea that you are you filter out to make a perfect race? You
00:30:32
filter out other kinds of the study of how to arrange reproduction with human population to increase the occurrence of hair uh heritable characteristics
00:30:38
regarded as regarded as desirable. Right? But that's not what she's saying. She's not saying only [ __ ] people that
00:30:44
are going to give a perfect course. No, they're playing with the homonym and people took it. What does homonym mean? Homonym is because of her jeans genes.
00:30:50
because it's the it's the same word, different meaning. But what I'm saying is correct is that eugenics is a completely different ideology than
00:30:57
what's being presented. But I don't even know how the misstep happened. It doesn't even make sense to me. How are these two things intertwined?
00:31:02
Cuz she's beautiful and blonde hair, blue-eyed. So they're going Nazi [ __ ] Yeah. The same
00:31:08
Dude, come on. That's not That's Is it tied to like cuz you know Trump says a lot, you know, I mean jeans I like you have great jeans or you know I
00:31:14
mean you have great jeans. Not the pants but like he does talk. He talks a lot about jeans. Oh, so they're putting this they're full
00:31:20
I don't know. Maybe there's a connection. Trump on [ __ ] Sydney Sweeney. Let me say this about this.
00:31:25
Yeah. First of all, uh, her mom and dad did make a [ __ ] hot kid. Okay. Bingo. Okay. So, she does have pretty good [ __ ] jeans. Yeah, she has good jeans.
00:31:37
Good jeans. Our parents. Yeah. Not good jeans. Not good jeans. I came out [ __ ] orange.
00:31:43
He came out that. What? Well, that's insane. Yeah. I mean, if we were doing that, our jeans, what would the jeans look like? Ripped just pre-worn one just distressed.
00:31:56
Just one little side with, you know what I mean? Would be there left. You'd be little jean shorts frayed at the bottom.
00:32:02
Yeah. I'd be distressed. Mo uh uh I'd be distressed. The lowest quality denim, too. The
00:32:07
lowest quality. Oh, dude. The [ __ ] uh downtown off the factory. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Those Yeah. Anyway,
00:32:13
the one where when you when you wear them new with shoes, it dyes the shoes blue. Yeah, that's the jeans that we are. Look, I
00:32:19
don't I don't understand it. I think it's such a [ __ ] weird She's fine. She's going to I just think it's weird
00:32:24
that they've kind of like put it on her as if she said something controversial. She's reading bad copy.
00:32:31
Media literacy is dead. Media literacy is dead. Also, she has great [ __ ] Yeah, her genealogy is great. She's very good-looking,
00:32:37
which she's symmetrical. She has better jeans than me. Same. Yeah. No, not literal jeans, though. You have
00:32:44
phenomenal denim. No, no, my denim is better. You have some of the best denim in the world. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, they're comparing her to Trump. Okay. That's what I'm said. That's I think the
00:32:50
the connection there. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. He says it a lot, but he also says a lot of things in repeat like billions and
00:32:55
billions and billions. He says a lot in two weeks. He says a lot. You know what I mean? Like if they go where's the
00:33:01
health cut in two weeks, which is so smart. Such a good amount of time cuz one is too quick.
00:33:07
Yeah. It's so smart in a weird one. One week means next week. But if you go two weeks Yeah. people forget in two weeks
00:33:12
100%. And if I say how long you How long were you over there? You go two weeks. Even if it was like a week and a half. Yeah.
00:33:17
Two weeks. Like, why are you there for a long time? Yeah. It's It's enough of amount of time where it's not threatening, but it also gives
00:33:23
you weight to go, "What? That was two weeks ago. Is it three weeks better?" 3 weeks is scary. Why? Cuz it's almost a month.
00:33:28
In three weeks. It's almost a month, right? That's too much. Is it too much? A month is a long time. Okay. One 12th of a year.
00:33:34
Two weeks then. Think about it though. Two weeks. Yeah. He's Dude, he's organized speech in a way where he knows exactly how to how to
00:33:41
entice you and then make you forget. He should have been in Now You See Me, Now You Don't. Yeah.
00:33:46
Yeah. He's so good. He's so good at that. It never happened. Yeah. It's really good. Yeah. Or when the heat's on, he just
00:33:53
comes up with other things that people focus on. He's so good at that. Could have been a Fantastic Four then. He's really good at all that.
00:33:58
Yeah. Right. He's good, dude. Yeah. He's like Shin Limb but white. He is. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There. Right. And people go, "Yeah." And then he's gone. He's gone.
00:34:09
But you hear him walking. I do hear him walking. Yeah. You hear him creaking through the hallway. And I hear his veins and his ankles like squishing.
00:34:15
I can already hear the young What are those things that he has there? He's got something going on with the veins and his ankles. Don't like it.
00:34:22
Look at that. It's all spilling over his shoe. That's so funny. Yeah. Look at that. With bruised hands.
00:34:30
Let me say something. I mean, dude, it's just like you have so much money. Just leave. Why would we just retire?
00:34:36
Retire. Just get out. Yeah, but he's gota he's gonna finish being president for sure. Yeah. Zoom into his ankles.
00:34:43
Yeah. What is it? Venus. He has some sort of thing called Venus something. Some something. What's the disease? He
00:34:49
has vicaros veins. No. Look at it's a real chronic venus insufficient. How serious
00:34:54
is Trump's condition? Yeah. So what? His legs get all [ __ ] up. Mhm. Yeah. Like blood pools in a certain
00:35:01
section of his body. We got to exercise, baby. I know. You got to exercise. Isn't golf exercise?
00:35:07
No, you're just walking around. But that's still exercise. No, I disagree. Oh, by by the way, exercise. So, we went
00:35:14
hiking the other day and I I don't the the hiking trail by my house. I think it's called Park Sado or something. Park Sado.
00:35:19
Yeah. Yeah. But anyway, um what's park Sorado? That's what it's called. There was a sign that said that. Sado means closed.
00:35:30
Oh, park closed. Did you already walk out of there? No, I did it anyway. Careful. Yeah. Park S. Oh, dumb. I did it. You're so dumb.
00:35:41
I did it. You're one of my favorite people. So anyway, and I don't want to be mean and I I we might I don't know. Let me
00:35:47
just throw it out there. Say it. Something happened. Number one, right? This part, this hiking trail goes to the top of this
00:35:54
mountain, right? And what I usually do is I turn around back. So I'm just like cuz I
00:35:59
don't know what's on the other side. You ever done that before? I usually try to finish it, but I see I
00:36:05
map it out first. But when you're on the top of the mountain, you look down. You don't know where it leads. Well, then I'm not doing it
00:36:10
right. But this time I went, you know what? I'm going to go where it leads. Mistake. Where'd you end up?
00:36:16
Miles. Miles. Miles away. I ended up in a residential area. But you were by yourself.
00:36:21
By myself. Don't do that. I told you not to. Yeah. I And that like it's And that light was going, you know, I mean, no.
00:36:26
Right. But thankfully, there was a line scooter. There was. Yeah. Yeah. I lined back to my car. I was going to say you walked on
00:36:32
the other side of the hill and you ended up at the whites only Arkansas land. Yeah. And there was a lady and I don't
00:36:38
want to make fun of her. I'm not trying to make fun of her. I just was confused by it. There was a lady in the beginning of the trail like literally right when you
00:36:45
start going up and she was like on a TikTok and she's like, "Yeah." And she was very heavy set. Can it
00:36:53
can I just let me finish it and then we'll cut it out. God. All right. And she go, "Hey guys, so I'm
00:36:59
doing it. Hiking, you know what I mean? Doing the exercise, right?" And in my heart, I was like, "Oh, good for you. This is great." Right? So I start walking up, right? At no point when it
00:37:12
turned around. The medevac helicopter comes in. So there's two things. Yeah. Number one, it was for Sha. Well, no, maybe she maybe she's just taking it slow.
00:37:23
Or number two, she had already gone to the limit. At the start she's like, "Hey, I got
00:37:29
there." They say half of the journey is getting to the gym. Yeah. But I was concerned for her. I was like, "Oh, where is she?"
00:37:35
It was out of concern. I wasn't trying to make fun of the story what I just said. Yeah, it was.
00:37:41
No, it wasn't. There was a guy that was running on the hike the other day who had on a full sweatuit. It's 87
00:37:46
degrees. That's blows my mind. Why do people do this? Yeah. I'm like, "Dude, you're going to pass out." What? Wrestlers?
00:37:52
He's not in high school. This gu was his late 30s. He was like a man who was running on the trail dripping in sweat.
00:37:57
And I was like, "Such a weird game, dude." Cuz you're asking for for dehydration and then overheating, dude.
00:38:04
Cuz I told you this story. My buddy EP's friend, they were hiking and he had to get medevaced out. His lung collapsed
00:38:11
cuz he doesn't really hike often. And he was like, "I'll go hike. He smokes weed all fucking." Oh my god. They had to medevac him out.
00:38:16
Oh my god. His lung collapsed. Yeah, but there are benches. You can just rest. I'll tell him that.
00:38:22
Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, the amount of people that I used to when I used to live by Renion and I would go hike that every day.
00:38:27
Yeah. The amount of people I saw get medevaced out of there, it was at least once a month. They'd have to bring cuz someone would get way up on the on the, you
00:38:34
know, on the hard side on the other side of the park. Yeah. And they'd be stuck and maybe panic or
00:38:39
not be able to breathe. Yeah. It's there's some steep hills out. Oh, dude. It's And it's also when you do
00:38:44
the Hollywood sign, it's like five miles. Yeah. I can't do that. It's high. It's It's a long way to go. Also, in terms of fashion, can I just
00:38:51
trailing fashion? enough white people wearing the rice patty hats. Oh, only you can wear it. I'm just saying they have these gigantic Saigon rice.
00:39:01
Well, then take off that baseball hat. That's ours. That's not us. That's ours. Go to Japan.
00:39:06
Baseball is born in America. Those are our hats. Okay, take it off. If I can wear rice hats. All right, you can wear rice hats.
00:39:12
That's my bad, dude. My bad. You can wear the rice hats. Which race of hats uh can I wear? Can I
00:39:18
can wear a rice patty hat? Yeah. Could I wear But it's like, how about this? What if I wear one of those like um armor? You
00:39:24
know what I mean? Like a knight's helmet. That's rad. Yeah, but like would that offend you if I wear a knight's helmet?
00:39:30
No. Pretty uncomfortable. I know. Okay, so I can wear that. You can wear the rice patty. Thank you. What's another white thing I could wear?
00:39:36
One of those, you know, at in London, the the big, you know, the black little puffy hats. What? Uh
00:39:42
the royal guard. Royal guard. Royal guard hat. I want to wear one of those. Yeah. You're okay with that? I think you should wear that. Okay.
00:39:47
Could I wear a like an A blink top hat? Yeah, you're white. That's right. Yeah. Don't forget. Yeah. That's what, by the way, all the our people in Arkansas should be wearing top hats.
00:39:57
Yeah. Right. Just to go free the slaves. Oh, so take your clothes off. China made those.
00:40:02
China made those. Take your clothes off. China made those. Yeah. In fact, that's what I want to do. I want to be an Asian inspector over
00:40:08
there. You want, by the way, I'm going to look at every made in China thing. You know what I mean? And I'm going to take it out of your [ __ ]
00:40:14
build house. But you're Korean. If I could lie, they're not going to know the difference. No, I don't. Yeah. I'm telling you, Mone, if you were like never seen an Asian like the premise before
00:40:25
and I told you I was Chinese, you would believe me 100%. Zoom in. Korean inventions are all
00:40:30
the beauty products. By the way, I hear this all the time from dude, my sister, my wife, every girl in my life goes,
00:40:35
"Korea, you got to get me beauty [ __ ] if you go over there because it's the best in the world." In the world. Beverages fans. You guys love those
00:40:42
little hand fans. Asian jins singh we created. M that's that's hard to believe but yeah dried food snacks I believe
00:40:48
you zoom in because my eyes are blur blur soju love soju robotics in general huh yeah kaka friends
00:40:58
just black friends yeah that's what they call them yeah friends is a lineup of adorable
00:41:03
characters that predom but pro p prominently features a little line see this is this is everybody trump on trying to jump on the like the lab boooo
00:41:10
trend ah you know what that is don't you I do I have pump. You have a Lubu? Yeah, I bought some.
00:41:16
How much are those? Expensive. The one I got. Are they really? Yeah. I don't I've just seen them. $5,000.
00:41:23
Yeah. For that one. And you put it on your [ __ ] You What do you do with it? In a drawer.
00:41:28
It doesn't go anywhere. I have Cabbage Patch Kids. You I do I collect like one of everything.
00:41:34
But I see people girls put this on their purse, right? That's the gig. Yeah. So, the pur some of these purses
00:41:40
aren't even $5,000 and they're putting a $5,000 accessory on the purse. It's a fad like Beanie Babies. One day
00:41:47
it's going to go away and no one's going to give a [ __ ] Let me tell you something. My mom fought people to get a Cabbage Patch Kids in the 80s. Fought
00:41:53
people, you know, she did all that. Shopify. You know what, Andrew? We wouldn't have a online business without Shopify. I'll tell you that right now. Right. We've been using them for a long time right now. And ch-ing ching.
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Shopify does get it done. No matter how big, no matter how small your business is, no matter what you're selling, I don't really care if you're making, you
00:42:13
know, uh, bouncy balls made out of old skin like you used to collect. Yeah, I still make them.
00:42:19
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Go to shopify.com/badfriends. shopify.com/ friends. Zach Dog. Zach. Oh, what happened? You fell again. I fell again. But where do I go? Zockd. You know what? You know what it
00:43:34
is? What? It's a free app and website where you can search and compare high quality in network doctors and click to instantly
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book an appointment. Andrew, yeah, that sounds But how many doctors are on there? Like aund? A lot. Hundreds of thousands.
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More than 100,000 doctors are on there. Yeah, across every special. Okay, but here's the other problem. They're probably located nowhere near me. They're always around you.
00:43:53
Really? Yeah. Do they take my insurance? Yeah, they do. And are they a good fit for whatever medical need I might have?
00:43:59
What's your foot like? It hurts. Taking care of from Zak. Eye pain. Well, do they have patient reviews? If I
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go on Zach, Doc, I know if somebody else was on there that went to a doctor. Yes, dude. You read it like you would read like, you know, a restaurant or
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whatnot. Really? Yes. Yes. Yes. Okay. Well, tell me, there's no way to instantly book an appointment. I mean, is there a way to get a booking within
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like, you know, 24 hours, bud? 24 to 72 hours if you want to know the specifics. Really? And you could even score on uh same day
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appointments, too. Sometimes Yes. Yes. All right. Well, I should stop putting off this broken neck and weird floppy
00:44:28
foot. Yeah. And eye pain. That's right. And stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to zdock.com/badfriends to find and
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instantly book a toprated doctor today. That's zoocdoc.com/badfriends. zdock.com
00:44:46
7200. But here's the joke. It is a fad, but the guy who invented it, you saw that, right? We talked about it on the
00:44:51
show. Maybe he s he sold his company for like $22 billion. Look upu owner$22 billion. It's he has like a bunch of other companies, but I think he just got priced at 22 billion or something. Leubu
00:45:06
Wang Ning. Hilarious. CEO of PopMart, the owner associated with Viral Labu Toys, whose company's
00:45:12
success has significantly contributed to his estimated net worth of over $22 billion.
00:45:17
This [ __ ] is selling [ __ ] And it's not [ __ ] It's [ __ ] It is. It's [ __ ] [ __ ]
00:45:22
But don't you wish you created it? Give me a picture of Wang Ning. Went from He went from 8 billion to 22 billion. So
00:45:29
it's all labu [ __ ] Give me Wang Ning. Everybody Wang Ning tonight. It's Wang Ning. Idiot. Ning. N I N. Wang Ning. There's the Wang dog. There's the Wang dog. Look at him. I'm
00:45:44
so rich now. God, what is he 22 years old? He looks like a kid. Yeah. What is he going to do with the 22 billion?
00:45:49
Honestly. Yeah. There is nothing you can do with it. Yes, you can. No, no, no. I'm serious, though. I'm
00:45:55
serious with this. It's so much money. He's 38. There's nothing he can do with it. It's too much. It It will never He's
00:46:03
got If he had 8 billion last year, he already had everything he ever needed. What the [ __ ] are you going to do?
00:46:09
That's right. I am I am I'm I'm a little anxious to go home because I'm going to be spending Dude, it's one this is one
00:46:16
of those points in my life where I really want to see my parents because I I miss them a lot and I don't see them as much and they're getting older, but
00:46:22
I'm going to be spending too much time at home. Do you know what I mean? Like when you How long? Well, it's Well, it's a whole week and
00:46:28
then I come back for three days, then I leave, then I come back for three days, then I leave, then I come back for
00:46:34
another week. That's good. I need it. I need it. I need the family thing, but also um I can hardly hear my
00:46:41
dad and I fighting. Like I can already hear it. Like the last time we got or real?
00:46:47
My stepdad. My my dad. He's the best. Yeah. You love him. Yeah. This This is my This is the last time we
00:46:52
got into like a stupid fight. Like we'll just start getting into stupid fights cuz he's retired. He's old. It's his house. He likes his his way. We all like
00:46:58
things our way. Oo, here we go. I want to know. No. No. This is so stupid. This made me laugh. My sister and I were dying
00:47:03
laughing because he got so mad. We were going to watch a movie and uh my sister went out to go get stoned and oh no edibles. That's right. She took a bunch of edibles and then she's like uh she
00:47:15
goes make us popcorn. I was like oh yeah I'll make us popcorn. So I got downstairs. I get a bunch of snacks
00:47:20
ready and all this stuff and I make the popcorn and I hear my dad go use the popcorn bowls. Okay. Since I
00:47:27
was a kid, they've had the from the [ __ ] 80s or the early 90s. They've had these wooden Look up wooden
00:47:34
popcorn. Popcorn bowl. I mean, it's it's got to be like that's the it's beautiful. But no, no, no, no, no, no. Do from the '9s. Do '9s wooden popcorn.
00:47:44
It's like from a that first one. Let me see the first one. Zoom in. That is got it. That is exactly what it is.
00:47:50
Beautiful. It's a salad bowl, right? Yes. Okay. So, listen. We've been using That is exactly what it is. We've been using
00:47:56
these since I was a [ __ ] kid. Okay. Yeah. For And my dad, it's for popcorn. So then I don't know if I'm a little stoned or a little buzzed or whatever, but I grab just a different bowl. And I
00:48:08
put the popcorn in. He's like, don't put it in there. That's not the popcorn bowl.
00:48:14
But I was like, I already put it in. And he's like, don't that's not the [ __ ] popcorn bowl.
00:48:20
I go, it's a bowl. You put popcorn. Now it is a popcorn bowl. Yeah. Yeah. And he's fighting me. My sister's losing
00:48:26
her mind laughing. And I'm [ __ ] pissed. So I was just like, "Oh, you want in the [ __ ] So I dump it in the
00:48:31
other one." I was like, "Well, then you're washing." Wait, wait, wait. Why can't you just use the popcorn bowl?
00:48:36
That's what I No. Yeah, use it because you know that he's going to get mad about it. No. No. You know what?
00:48:42
You only did it for spite. No. No. Yeah. You did it like I want to get I want to get him riled up.
00:48:47
I grabbed the first bowl that I saw. Do you know where the popcorn bowls are? I don't actually. That is true. Or the
00:48:52
next go in and No. No. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Tomorrow when you go and No. I don't know where they are. Yeah. Yeah. Go. Excuse me. Where's the
00:48:58
popcorn bowls? And so then Okay. So then then he comes out to my house in LA. Comes out to Derry's house.
00:49:05
Yeah. Big Andrew's house. Yeah. And he says, "Well, why is that there about something
00:49:14
innocuous?" What was it? And it was I don't I don't even remember. It was like a matcha [ __ ] thing that she uses or something.
00:49:20
Who's she? my wife, okay, a matcha maker, whatever. And then he's like, well, why is that there? And I said, when you get your house, you can put it
00:49:33
wherever the [ __ ] you want, but in my house, that's where I like it. And you know what? He goes, "Fair enough." And then he walked outside and I and I was like, "That's right,
00:49:43
dude. What is wrong with you, dude?" Just rage, dude. No. Ah, god. Because he's getting older,
00:49:50
right? Mhm. Then you go, "Excuse me, I'll put the matcha thing in the right matcha place."
00:49:56
No, it's my house. Okay. But it's probably left just in a random place, right? You have you been to my house? Is
00:50:02
anything left in a random place? No. It's very like showroomy. It's exactly where it's supposed to be. Yeah. Yeah. It's very clean. So, that thing goes there because that's
00:50:08
where it goes for us. Yeah. I live Why is it so clean? Because uh in case I have people come over, I like to keep a clean place. No,
00:50:15
you know why I like to keep a clean place? Because I earned it. M cuz I respect the things that took me a
00:50:21
long time to get. Yeah. I don't understand the idea of not respecting something you worked hard to receive. Yeah.
00:50:27
How about this? I've never had anything given to me. So, anything I've got I respect. Maybe you should, too.
00:50:33
Yeah. I respect what I have. But I kind of like making people think that I'm kind of a hoarder.
00:50:39
You are kind of a hoarder. I am. You sent me the video of the two machines talking to each other. It made me laugh. Did you see that?
00:50:44
The two robots. Oh, it's so good. Yeah. Yeah. No, but you think I was lying. I know. You keep a clean place, too. By the way,
00:50:49
people at home pretend this game that he plays like I'm this neat freak. You're a [ __ ] neat freak.
00:50:55
Your kitchen and [ __ ] is all organiz Everything's organized. Yeah, because of Honey, Kala's sister,
00:51:01
Jules's mom. Okay. So, I I have someone clean the house, too. So, that's why it's clean. Get a Filipino. Live live with a
00:51:09
Filipino. They're the best. She does these things with this link right here to get a Filipino.
00:51:14
She does things with my under. I don't even know how the my underwear are these tiny squares.
00:51:22
She folds them in a way they're like a [ __ ] graham cracker. She makes you She takes all the air out. I don't know
00:51:27
how she does it. It's magic. We can cram 300 of them in a tiny drawer like this.
00:51:33
Perfectly placed. Wait, she does your laundry? Oh my god. She does everything. Oh, see. Yeah, I can't have
00:51:38
She does everything. I can't have someone do my laundry. That's creepy to me. I just to know where things are. That's the only problem, you And where's the
00:51:45
paprika? And that's why you occasionally use the wrong popcorn bowl cuz you don't know where they are. Oh, that's right. That's right. That's right. But that is my dad. We're going to get into stupid small fights. We'll get into
00:51:55
small fights all the time. Like look, I'll stay up one night too late burning a bonfire in the backyard with my sister. 100%.
00:52:02
Not cool, dude. No. No. What's wrong with bonfires are [ __ ] Midwest. You start it at night, take it out.
00:52:08
What does that mean? Put it out, dude. Oh, I do put it out. No, I'm saying he'll come down that you didn't even hear me out. Oh, sorry.
00:52:15
I know. That's right. I didn't. I'm sorry. My bad. He'll come down the next morning and be like, "You use so much [ __ ] wood."
00:52:22
And I'll be like, "What the fuck?" Yeah, we were burning fire all night long. Yeah. He'll go, "Well, now I got to get a
00:52:28
whole new bushel." And I'm like, "Well, I'll get you one." He doesn't get them. They get [ __ ] delivered. Yeah, dude. It's always a thing.
00:52:33
Where do you get bushels? Home Depot. Yeah. Home Depot. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But you they'll deliver them to your house. Yeah. Yeah. You know what I So, um, what you know
00:52:40
what I realized? I don't know if I said this but not but my air conditioning and my heater all all winter the heater
00:52:47
didn't work and you don't call you just freeze you don't call but freeze you call no I freeze call it was like so cold but he had 15 layers of blankets you
00:53:00
shivering sweating and then for the summer right um no no no no air conditioning
00:53:07
good you to 50° nothing would come Oh, so one day I I finally called. Yeah, that's time. Guy comes over. He goes, "Bro, look." And he this He had blue chew.
00:53:18
No. No. This was the color of the filter. Oh my god. I didn't know you had to switch out the
00:53:24
filter. God, dude. Do you You just have to switch it out and then now everything works perfectly.
00:53:29
Have you ever changed the filter of your water system at the house? No. That's insane. But I don't drink um that kind of water.
00:53:35
You don't drink tap water? I call it Aaron Brockovich water. I don't drink it really. I don't want to get diluted. Yeah. Yeah. I drink
00:53:41
bottled water every time. That's That's insane. Why? That's a waste. Drink out of the tap.
00:53:47
The tap water in LA is great. I don't know, dude. We have some of the best tap water in the country. It's actually underrated. Our our water is tested about 300
00:53:54
locations on the city for over 200 different loc water delivered to you meets or excels state and federal drinking water standards. LA water is
00:54:00
better than most states get water. But is it better than bottled water? Yeah, pro. Actually, probably because of
00:54:05
the [ __ ] this is microplastics and all the [ __ ] that's in here. This is terrible for you. Yep. What about glass?
00:54:11
Glass is king. Not anymore. They just did a bunch of new testing to find out that glass also has [ __ ] up [ __ ] in it
00:54:17
now. So, we can't win. So, you know what you do? You don't drink water. We're not. That's it. At Bad Friends, we
00:54:24
don't drink water. Yeah. No more. Did we already talk about the hurdling spacecraft coming toward us? We did last time, right?
00:54:29
No. What are you talking about? Oh, it's coming in December. Yeah. It's coming. We got a new We got something coming to kill us.
00:54:35
No. So, a Harvard sc Harvard scientist Don't believe him already. Harvard don't believe him.
00:54:40
Okay. A Harvard scientist discovered something. He doesn't think it's a comet because there's no trail. I don't think a Harvard scientist and professor Avi
00:54:52
lobe Avi lobe has suggested using the existed NASA Juno spacecraft to intercept and
00:54:57
study interstellar object three I atlas which he uh he what persists could be alien technology not just a natural comet. This proposal stems from his research for similar objects like
00:55:11
Amumara. Yeah, that was in 2017. Amumo. I remember. Uh, so what was that? It's hiding behind the sun. Were he paralyzed? No. Why are you laughing? That's true.
00:55:23
The trajectory is behind the sun, so we can't see it. Well, we go around the sun.
00:55:29
You go around it, not me. Okay. I stay right behind it. He is right. He's now Bobby stays right
00:55:36
behind. I stay right behind the sun. Okay. So, um, yeah, it's coming. And, um, that's so funny. It's four miles wide or seven miles wide, something like that. Whoa. It's huge. Big.
00:55:49
And um where do we hope it hits? It's not getting trapped in any uh planet's gravity as it goes through the
00:55:54
Milky Way. It's just slowly coming by us and it'll hit us around December. We'll
00:56:00
be able to see. Do they think they know where it's going to hit? No, it's just going to go right through the Milky Way, but it's going to pass
00:56:05
Earth uh in December. It's not going to hit us. No, no, no. It's gonna It's It's not a comet, dude.
00:56:12
I hope it hits us. It's a It's not a hit situation, guy. What if it's a bomb? It's a slow down situation. It's like,
00:56:18
"What's up, dog?" situation, dude. So, you think this is them saying, "What's up, dog?" Yes, dude. And you know, we re watched
00:56:25
signs last night, me and um this is someone I was seeing. And um you know, there's two types of people in the
00:56:30
world, dude. What are they? The type that sees stars in the light. You got it. There's two types of people. They see aliens spacecraft in the skyline and
00:56:43
they believe they have hope. Swing away, right? And the second one are naysayers.
00:56:48
That 50/50 and deep down they're instilled with fear and I'm hope. I'm number one. What was it that killed the aliens? Water. Yeah. And guess what we just said? Don't drink water.
00:57:00
Wow. Wow. We're the real aliens. You don't believe this is true? Of course. What do you mean? I think there's a thing. I don't think it's
00:57:06
[ __ ] alien life form. I think they're so fast they'd be here by now. Yeah. See what how big is it? It's like four miles is seven miles or something.
00:57:12
Like maybe seven miles is so big. It's It's between one and 20 kilometers. So they don't
00:57:18
even know. That's six miles. Yeah, it's big. Most recent operations size closer to six miles. Six miles long. It's a lot.
00:57:29
That's so long. It's big. But that's got to be all the guys are on there then. Then their whole Yeah, they're the everyone's on there. Yeah. All the homies are on there.
00:57:35
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Imagine if they left some guys off. Where are you guys going? Yeah.
00:57:40
Past Earth. Can I go? But if they go I don't know there's enough room. He said it was 6 miles long. I don't know if we have the room.
00:57:51
Yeah. Yeah. Just one guy they can't stand. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Hey Mark. Marcus. Marcus. Yeah. I heard you guys are going to take off tomorrow.
00:57:56
Yeah. Yeah. Uh is there any room on the craft? Well, um no, there's not enough room.
00:58:02
Really? Yeah. There's 20 of us. It's pretty cozy in there. I heard it was six miles long.
00:58:08
Yeah, but you know what? The living space is, you know, size of this room. Oh, I understand. I understand. I understand.
00:58:13
Bye. Bye. By the way, they take off. They're like, "Thank God we left that [ __ ] guy. I
00:58:18
can't stand that [ __ ] guy." But see, what would happen if they go, "Andrew Bobby, big fan of Bad Friends."
00:58:26
Dude, I hope I hope they go, "We want to start a podcast in our civilization. Will you come?"
00:58:32
Great. Would you come? when we got a guest on their podcast. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I have 4.5 million
00:58:38
followers in our version of in Yeah. Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, would you go our
00:58:44
guest today say whatever they want. Totally unfiltered. We love these guys. By the way, you know what's so funny is
00:58:50
I bet you if any sort of communication is getting through the airwaves into outer space, it's probably podcast
00:58:57
because there's so many of them that are being shot out into the [ __ ] world. This is probably what they're hearing. Yeah.
00:59:02
And what a bummer. What a bummer that this is what they think of us. And they're probably 20 million years
00:59:08
from now. No, it doesn't get there right away. It takes time. Yeah. It takes a long time.
00:59:13
Not not 20 million years, but a long time. Well, I mean, they could be millions of light years away. Yeah. Yeah. Depends on how far away they are.
00:59:20
Yeah. But we'd be long dead by then. Notorious in a universal state. Depends on if we hop on that craft.
00:59:26
How we go. That Bobby Andrew, we came just for you two. You can't bring any of the bad friends.
00:59:32
But if it What if they said it could just be you and me? No one we love. No one we know. But we can never come back to Earth. Never. No family, no friends, no.
00:59:38
You wouldn't go. I know you wouldn't go. Yeah. I would go. No, you would not go. You'd be so
00:59:43
scared. I would go. I would go. I would go. I would go just to protect you. What a what a story. They'd write books of
00:59:48
books about us. They'd write movies about us. It'd be our real legacy. We wouldn't just be known as bad friends. We'd be known as the two guys that went
00:59:54
to space on the seven mile craft and never came back. Wow. We'd be embedded. You know who'd be teaching about us in the future? fifth
01:00:00
grade teachers. Yeah. What's there though? It would depend on what's there. Doesn't matter. Let's find out.
01:00:06
No, no. I have to know. I have to have a list. We get up on the craft right away. It's anal probes. We're like, what?
01:00:12
I thought that it No, we really like to do this. Yeah. Yeah. It would it would have to be um Well, there have to have human women there.
01:00:23
My dad just called me. Hold on. Hey, we're doing the podcast right now. What's up? Uh, just calling to check on you and find out when you're coming to town.
01:00:33
Is it Jeff? Uh, yeah. Say hi to Jeff. It's Bob. Hey, how are you? What's up with the popcorn bowls?
01:00:42
The popcorn bowls. Um, well, u they're special for popcorn only. But why do you get so mad about it, Jeeoff? Well, because uh we have things in the
01:00:55
house that are be used for certain things. And Andrew uh was, you know, being typical Andrew uh being against the grain and picking another bowl, right? Against the grain. Against the grain.
01:01:08
All right, babe. All right. See you, Bobby. Take care. All right. Bye, Jeff. I love you. I'll see you. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Bye, babe.
01:01:14
Okay. All right. Bye. He's so funny. So, we get a lot of submissions for different things, but we always get way
01:01:20
more submissions after episodes air with the minute. So, these are all late submissions, but this is Carlos
01:01:26
replacement. Fancy. Okay, let's see some of them. We do want to see some of these energy replacements. Uh this is Charity.
01:01:32
What up, Bad Friends gang? Uh my name is Charity. I am 25 and I'm from Gaston, Oregon. Um Gaston's like a 15-second town. If you blinked, you probably already drove past it. We got like two
01:01:44
bars, no gas stations, about a dozen crackheads out of a total population of 16. So that's where I'm from. Um yeah,
01:01:53
I'm a bit of a rarity out in these parts. You probably never seen a Samoan girl under 6'2 270. So, um, I at least
01:02:01
got that going for me. Funny. Good. I currently work in corporate finance and administrative assistance. Um, and
01:02:07
I'm working to get certified as an independent travel booking agent on the side. So, uh, yeah, kind of got the
01:02:14
hustle going. Try to get out of this crapshoot town. Pause. We got to get her out. All All I'm going to say, don't get
01:02:20
upset. Okay. This is a perfect, and I mean perfect, replacement for your assistant.
01:02:27
Yes. Literally. Yeah. She does all the things. Yeah. Also, all the travel booking.
01:02:33
That's what That's what I'm [ __ ] saying. No, but hey, but my assistant's camping.
01:02:41
Okay. Is never not camping. Okay. This girl probably doesn't like camping. Great. She's awesome. We love her. God,
01:02:48
two good ones so far. Back to back. Desawn. Hey. Yeah. The way you said that. Desawn. Just say Deshawn.
01:02:59
Deshan. Yeah. Not Desan. Go ahead. What's going on? This is the submission for the replacement in the booth
01:03:05
challenge or whatever you guys are doing over there. Love this guy. Oh, really? Now, I heard you guys were looking to
01:03:11
replace someone. But one thing I did hear you guys say was you got a bunch of nines. Why get have a nine when you can
01:03:18
settle for an 11? Also, you said you have you need some women to submit. I guarantee you women in that building. He thinks he's Michael B Jordan.
01:03:30
He's got but he's not. He's not Michael Beep Jordan. Michael Jeep. Yeah. Or Jeep. I [ __ ] that up.
01:03:37
I [ __ ] that joke up. What? It made me laugh cuz you went beep beep. He thinks you know what it is. He thinks
01:03:43
he's Michael Jeep Jordan. He's Michael Beep Jordan. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. There. Good. Good. Good. I guarantee you
01:03:49
he does. Yeah. Um he seems like a nice guy. Yeah. Yeah. We like him. We like him. A little aggressive.
01:03:54
He's at 11 though. I don't know why he says 11. I don't know what that means. Maybe it means he can go up to 11.
01:04:00
You have women in that building. But you know what? You don't have is give a shot. How come we still not
01:04:07
getting shots? Nobody want to give us a chance. Okay. He has a point. First of all, he has a point. He has a point.
01:04:13
First of all, Yeah. Yeah. Desawn. Yeah. I do understand what he's saying. I do 100%.
01:04:19
Perhaps we should have some more color in the booth. Diversity. I think we need a color commentator.
01:04:24
Yeah. And that's not that's a He would be funny. He would. Yeah. Yeah, he would. Yeah. But he also Can we do guest? We could try guests.
01:04:36
We could try. We could also have people uh zoom in or face him in if we want face to face interactions.
01:04:41
Yeah, maybe we zoom first. I think that's probably a better way. Zoom then guest. Mhm. Yeah. Yeah. This is Karissa T.
01:04:48
Love. Love it. Yeah, she's pretty. Hey, Andrew. Hey, Bobby. Let me get this out of the way right now. The reason why I said Andrew instead of Bobby first is
01:05:01
because his name starts with an A and Bobby starts with a B. So, now that I got that out of the way, I just saw today's episode where you
01:05:15
were you guys were asking for a replacement for Fancy B since he's leaving for a few months. I would like to say that Andrew said that
01:05:28
we have to be from Spain, which I'm not, but I am Spanish as you can clearly tell
01:05:35
tell from my accent. And I'm not from the area, but it's really easy for me to make it there. If you if I get the if I get picked,
01:05:50
just if I get paid, let me know and I'm going to be there as soon as I can. Thank you. Pause this. It's It's Shut it down. We've got the guy.
01:06:03
It's love at first sight. Shut it down. We've got It's love at first sight, dude. The guy. That's the guy, dude.
01:06:08
Find him. Find him. We've got the guy. We got the guy. He's [ __ ] perfect. He's perfect. He's a upgraded version of
01:06:16
what we have. It's amazing. Yeah. Now, yeah, we're also gonna find out for certain.
01:06:21
Great. Cut. That this young man absolutely lives somewhere we cannot access. Yeah. You said you can drive and look at
01:06:28
the Let's do some investigating. Can you zoom in at the greenery in the back? I'm really good at like uh
01:06:33
Yeah, Bobby's good at figuring, you know, like geom mapping. Geoming. Yeah, he's so good at that. Yeah, he's so good at it. Zoom in. All right. You know that kind
01:06:40
of foliage? Does that recognize at all? That's North Carol. That's North Carolina North Carolina. No, North Northern California.
01:06:46
Northern California. Yeah. Yeah. Even better. Truck right here. It looks like Yeah. I don't I can't see it. It's
01:06:52
blurry, but And you know what? You know what's behind that truck is a Michael Jeep Jordan is right behind
01:06:57
I I got to tell you, I love this guy. I'm into this guy. Let's find out. Let's try to get him, though. I think he said I think he said he wants
01:07:03
to be paid, which is fine. We'll pay him if I get picked. Oh, but we will pay him. We'll pay him for the day's work.
01:07:10
You know what? I'm willing to pay out of my own pocket. M 300 bucks. I'll match it.
01:07:15
Really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It just depends on 600 to get him here. 600 depends on where he's coming from, too. Let's be real. Let's send him a message.
01:07:21
All right. Well, listen. We're excited for the future. We're happy for the prospects. Thank you guys for submitting. We'll get
01:07:27
to some more submitts later, but we but Crusoto what? Curisso to honestly, whatever it
01:07:35
is, dog. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We'll come up with a nickname. Yeah, we will. Yeah. Yeah. Uh we'll see you soon.
01:07:41
We'll see you soon. And also thank you for being a bad friend. [Music] Woo! Yeah!
01:07:59
Woo!