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Fat King & The Lying Jester | Ep 239 | Bad Friends

October 07, 2024 / 01:10:40

This episode features a live show announcement for "Scary Times USA" with co-hosts Bobby Lee and Khalyla Kuhn discussing various topics including jazz musicians, a dog attack incident, and humorous anecdotes.

Bobby and Khalyla engage in a light-hearted conversation about jazz musicians, with Bobby humorously critiquing the genre and mentioning artists like John Coltrane and Ella Fitzgerald. They also touch on their personal preferences in music.

The episode takes a turn when they discuss a recent incident involving Britney Furlan's dog being attacked by a coyote, leading to a phone call with Britney to check on her dog's condition.

Throughout the episode, Bobby and Khalyla share funny stories, including a prank involving a dog and a humorous take on various topics like K-dramas and the dynamics of their friendship.

The episode concludes with a mix of humor and absurdity, showcasing the chemistry between the hosts and their unique perspectives on life.

TL;DR

Bobby and Khalyla discuss jazz, a dog attack, and share humorous stories in a lively episode.

Episode

1:10:40
00:00:00
hey hey everybody we're doing a bad friends live show it's called scary times USA scary time USA and how do you
00:00:06
how do you watch it go to moment. badf friends it's Thursday October 24th at
00:00:12
6:00 pm we're going to have exclusive merch available for it so bad friends scary time USA dude America dude oer
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24th at 6 p.m. PST we're live streaming it so join us moment. badri we'll also
00:00:26
be hosting an interactive VIP after party after the show an active patreon can join the VIP after party for free
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scary times USA you two are bad friends who are these two idiots a white dude and an
00:00:40
Asian dude you two are disgusting you two are something we're
00:00:45
bad friends let me do the horn will
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[Music] you baby but I learned about can I tell you
00:00:58
what you know how let me ask how many Jazz musicians can you name every single one well give me 10 col train what's his
00:01:06
first name John that's very dude this guy dude thanks he knows everything keep
00:01:11
going dude Miles Davis good Muddy Waters he's not in that
00:01:16
what he want is Blues he's not Jazz yeah he's not in it okay I refuse to let him
00:01:24
in Dizzy Gillespie dude that was a good one dude thank you dude that's deep cut
00:01:29
dude Dizzy Gillespie go ahead dude Dizzy Gillespie yeah
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um Eda Fitzgerald Ella Fitzgerald bro deep cut no not really pretty mainstream
00:01:41
go ahead um Mike Martinville there's no Mike
00:01:47
Martinville he used to be an insurance salesman in jazz no there's no Mike Martinville hi I'm Mike Martinville oh
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yeah okay maybe you you don't remember him oh yeah avangar yeah avangar avard
00:01:59
is there a Mike Martin go I don't think so that's him right there oh there he is right there a Mike
00:02:05
Martin okay he went to V it's Martin Vil no was hyphenated he got married he took her name super Progressive for the 60s
00:02:13
uh what did you learn on this doc though Ken Burns taught you what about jazz what did you take away from it it
00:02:21
sucks it really legitimately sucks no jazz is great it's terrible but here's what I learned also um what I learned
00:02:27
about it is uh man it's terrible and also I mean you're you're cuz I wanted
00:02:33
to go through I went through the whole thing and I was like maybe this from 1935 to 1940 maybe I'll like get get
00:02:39
into it right but I never did it never it never took except the only one that I really like is Billy Holiday cuz she's
00:02:45
so depressing right in my solitude and I was like kill yourself M
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why don't you it's so depressing you she's like a heroin don't say the same
00:03:00
thing about rock music that does sad depressing stuff why you just don't like the physical music I like her Sarah
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Von's okay but um I I I just got went through the whole thing and it's like um I just asked myself why why yeah yeah
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well touches people in a certain way well you know Louie godamn man I know what a guy died in 1971 um and um Duke
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Ellington died in 1974 I just memorized I memorized you just know when they die no I kind of memorized random things you
00:03:31
know in my mind you know what I mean so he died in 74 and uh pretty good you know who's modern day guy is a guy named
00:03:39
um Winton marceles oh yeah I've seen him on kill Tony no he's good yeah no he is
00:03:46
that guy dude he is pretty good dude look at him he his style is great yeah
00:03:51
and then he had a brother named Brandon or Brandon marceles marcelos
00:03:57
Wallace oh from Paul fiction Marcela wals is good yeah I heard it
00:04:02
yeah yeah very funny joke did not like and that bandit in his neck that's where the he puts the [ __ ] trombone he can blow from the back of
00:04:09
his NE yeah yeah he's a dolphin you know he's half dolphin he is yeah
00:04:16
Marcel's black dolphin dude you didn't know that yeah I almost watched Pulp
00:04:21
Fiction last night we're at the house that we stayed in had a little movie theater and instead we W there was a vote on what to watch and my vote didn't
00:04:30
win but I really thought it was going what did they want to watch one guy wanted Terminator another guy wanted
00:04:35
Pulp Fiction another guy wanted Wolf of Wall Street and I wanted Wayne's World but uh Wolf of Wall Street won of course
00:04:43
it did Wayne's World is so funny it's so a great it front to back is one of the funniest movies the amount of lines but
00:04:49
yes I wanted something uplifting wolf is actually super funny it's just I wanted Wackadoo funny right but we dude I
00:04:56
forgot how funny wolf was it's pretty I forgot the scene with conah is so
00:05:01
unbelievably funny yeah when he's doing Rudy tutors when he's be so mad at me right now dude I never saw the
00:05:07
movie you've never seen wolf at Wall Street I refuse why I don't like wolves I really don't I don't like
00:05:14
wolves I don't like that creature you know I like dogs you know what I mean but I I watch dogs of Wall Street yes
00:05:21
that'd be fun right little poodle you I mean just a boardroom of dogs barking
00:05:26
I'd watch that Nas or whatever you know they're they're in the ball stre whatever you know what do you do what is that do you hear about this how Britney
00:05:32
furlon dog got attacked by a coyote and it's all over the news today what do you mean got attack like in their H at oh my
00:05:38
God in their house yeah in the back whoa it it's in its mouth yeah right there
00:05:44
that's [ __ ] wild and then what happened is the dog alive it died I think we can't leave the dogs out she
00:05:49
says they're safe yeah Nina was safe I got I got to call her lift the dog I
00:05:55
gotta don't should I call her can we play that song while she answers the phone she's not going to pick up for me
00:06:00
I'm going to play who let the dogs out dude wait before dude but let me get a hold first and then play
00:06:07
it hold on well let me get on try to get her I yeah before before hold on hold on
00:06:14
hold on is she going to be mad this is mean is this mean is this mean no the dog's alive the dog's alive it's very
00:06:20
funny though please pick up Britney please
00:06:25
pick up who Let The Dogs Out
00:06:34
[Laughter]
00:06:41
wait is she still there hello Britney we love you we're just calling to make sure everything is okay I well hold
00:06:48
on that's amazing well who did let him out though yeah you know that's so scary
00:06:55
and sad though what happened eat your pizza fat ass telephone number
00:07:00
what did you get from The Prince Street it's so good that's my favorite oh britley Fon britley Fon Sheck call me
00:07:07
back get the [ __ ] hold on hello oh my God you're the devil what
00:07:13
what what do you mean I heard
00:07:19
thatc you and Andrew are so we love you we we love you so much we
00:07:25
just wanted to make sure the dog was okay we read that it was okay yeah she's good
00:07:30
yep I know but we just saw the video we didn't know about it and it must cuz we have dogs it must have been in town so
00:07:35
sorry I'm so sorry it was awful but we have to laugh at pain yeah we have to laugh at pain and the dog didn't die no
00:07:42
I [ __ ] pulled her out of its mouth is she injured oh my God look at it oh my God look at it oh it's so bad I'm so
00:07:48
sorry she's um she's like I'm G to take her to the vet she doesn't have any like puncture ons or anything but when I
00:07:54
touch her she's starting to cry so I she might have something going on but I'm sorry we're sorry we're sorry can I ask
00:07:59
you what are you wearing while you're out there in a robe a bath robe Oh I thought you were like you're not doing
00:08:06
yoga or anything no I was like just about to get in the shower and just like it's [ __ ] terrible dude I'm sorry
00:08:13
we're sorry we're so sorry where's Tommy during this s playing drums yeah no he was on a zoom in the
00:08:20
living room okay well tell him we said hi we love you so much you're on bad friends watch wait wait what's your
00:08:26
podcast called with Britney this is the worst this is the worst check their podcast out yeah we and we did we are we
00:08:33
we wanted to send you love we were initially called to say we we we we're happy the dog's okay but I just I had I
00:08:40
had we had to play the song just to show you some love you're you guys are literally Satan okay I love you
00:08:47
bye the dog's alive it's alive Rudy how you know what I mean yeah but who let the dogs
00:08:57
out this is this is a big nightmare for me this is Nightmare fuel for honestly every time so now at night yeah yeah
00:09:04
this is during the day which is even more insane but they live in the Hills yeah where there's way more coyotes by you yeah yeah so down by us they
00:09:11
sometimes get around the neighborhood but at night now I walk with the dog in my arm put her down to pee and pick her
00:09:17
right back up I used to let her out but now I don't let her out anymore yeah cuz neighbors have complained about coyotes
00:09:22
everywhere is like cannibalistic a coyote eating a dog well they're the same species it's like
00:09:28
eating a monkey we eat we ate monkey last week oh that's right it was a really good monkey spider monkey so good
00:09:35
it's like yeah yeah yeah there's they're fun to catch they are you got to climb the tree right they make that noise you
00:09:42
know I mean and they hate it but my point is is dude I just saw a video did you ever see did I send you this oh my
00:09:49
God I saw a video of a man eating a monkey it was terrifying pull it up on
00:09:54
Tik Tok I saw like a man cooking a turtle
00:09:59
I've said it once I'll say it again me it's the greatest app ever created yeah yeah you can see a man eating a turtle
00:10:04
oh I got it I got it I got the monkey one you want to see it we'll send it to Carlos you can play it for us all right so send this to in the meantime Jules
00:10:12
yeah what's going on take a bite of that pizza I know that's so good isn't it's one of my favorite favorite the naughty
00:10:17
pie naughty pie is my favorite by far it's not even close it's the best it's not even close they're contending with
00:10:24
some here go here we go here go oh no
00:10:31
whoa dude snacking on some Monk yeah
00:10:36
just the spine that's where the meat is the spine it's insane dude as he's
00:10:42
eating him he's like I miss you George yeah I was Curious George Curious
00:10:48
George yeah yeah yeah there he was he got too Curious George I want to add my my aunt in the Philippines she had a dog
00:10:56
and then um the dog um Escape went missing yeah yeah and then there was
00:11:04
like a like after a week there was a party like her birthday party or something stop
00:11:10
stop except for there I love it I think I know where this is gone I I I I can we guess or no yeah yeah all right so dogs
00:11:17
missing yeah then now now there's a party okay what kind of part who's is it a birthday party I think it was hers I
00:11:23
don't remember but there was a party there was a party and people just party
00:11:28
right right oh Bo I'm hungry are you hungry hungry
00:11:35
hungry oh did you get uh uh Jollibee who got Jollibee anybody no nobody got
00:11:42
Jollibee oh [ __ ] and then what happens and then her
00:11:48
father said like oh try this oh okay
00:11:53
what's his name the father I don't when someone says try this yeah yeah yeah try this the middle of the party he has to
00:12:01
yell at because there's a lot of party everyone try this try this yeah yeah
00:12:06
Music Stops DJ stops right and then they look at the dad and and do they go what
00:12:12
is it yeah she asked like what is it and then um he just said chicken it's just
00:12:18
chicken just chicken just chicken out of nowhere chicken
00:12:23
yeah just under the blue chicken so she ate it where did you where did you get the chicken I I don't know but she ate
00:12:30
it and she said oh it's really good blah blah blah okay and then and then her the father laughed and said oh it's your dog
00:12:37
oh my God which is the oldest prank in the it's the oldest trick in the book it's the oldest prank in the book it's
00:12:43
really a fun it's a fun prank people think it tastes like a a cross between beef and mutton very fast wow terrible
00:12:50
would you be mad if you ate my [ __ ] dog but in that context oh if someone fed me my dog
00:12:57
you're having a party yeah right I come in yeah hey eat
00:13:03
this right and it's my dog and then you ask me yeah what is it what is this
00:13:08
chicken oh it's [ __ ] chicken dude it's dark eat it now I'm delicious yeah
00:13:13
yeah and I got me Carl Carlos are you there yeah obviously you're obviously
00:13:19
there you have to help who else helped do it yeah yeah blood on my Shir yeah would you help M no Mone want to help
00:13:25
well what did you do did you crockpot it did you put in the oven I want to know how you made it we boiled it you boiled it terrible and then you ate it and then
00:13:32
I go it's your dog let me tell me the consequences now I'll tell you this the direct steps of action tick tick tick I
00:13:39
walk in the kitchen grab a knife and I stab stab stab stab stab stab stab I stab you to death and then I serve you
00:13:46
at your own funeral oh oh W dude that's really pretty good yeah that's you know
00:13:52
it was a prank dude a little too far it was a prank see some people can't take pranks that's
00:13:57
right they you know it's like you that sometimes you know that um tree prank where people are like a tree or or a
00:14:04
bush and they scare people and people walk by and people you they're General reaction is you got me right but
00:14:10
sometimes you'll see a guy kick him yeah right it's like oh you can't take a that's you kick the tree guy yeah you're
00:14:16
the kick the tree guy there's one clip on the internet that tree guy jumps out at a handicap girl and he feels terrible
00:14:22
he scares her she starts crying let's see it it's awful I love it this is awful it was on Tik Tok
00:14:30
[Music] did I scare
00:14:36
you what an [ __ ] see now this is why guys like me kick the Bushman because
00:14:42
you do that to a handicap girl and you ruin her day how do you feel now pal how
00:14:47
do you feel now pal he wants to watch it again I have to can we play it to the end though where's the feeling bad part
00:14:55
does he come out is he okay no she's not okay I tried to scare you
00:15:02
man is she okay is she all right sorry about
00:15:07
that no problem that's just going to ruin that guy's day can I can I throw something out
00:15:13
there I don't know that's not that popular something not a popular idea but um now forget it go
00:15:22
ahead I just no go ahead I don't want to give it a let's give it a go yeah yeah I
00:15:28
just process of elimination you think this is Darwinism just you know surviv I don't know
00:15:34
survival of the of the take the joke is the best okay got it yeah yeah if you can't take a prank you don't deserve to
00:15:41
live that's not what I was saying prank or die that's not what I was saying welcome back to pranker
00:15:48
day yeah anyway wow that's incredible I don't like the bush Man prank you know what I do like though even as a golfer I
00:15:55
like the guys that go to the public horse and the guy they hon of their air horns with the guys on the T box they
00:16:00
get so mad I think it's so funny and they freak the [ __ ] out these guys in they'll do this in La they go to these
00:16:06
golf courses and they hide they hide they hide behind like a wall of trees and then as soon as the guys are
00:16:12
swinging watch this I've always wanted those one of
00:16:17
those outfits me too dude can we can you get me one of those guys yeah
00:16:29
do he [ __ ] shat [Applause]
00:16:35
himself the real flagrant ones the guys will be standing there they'll just stand Push pause for a second can you
00:16:41
push pause for a second would that bother you it would shock me the first time then I would realize someone's
00:16:47
obviously [ __ ] with me what it bother you uh a little bit I think I don't think a little no but then I I would
00:16:53
know it's a prank and You' get over it at some point no that's the top one they do it the whole time
00:16:58
whole game oh yeah it would drive me nuts well they're not there the whole [Music]
00:17:06
[Applause] time uh oh by the way the Asian the guy
00:17:13
that picked us up today the driver that picked us up from the airport yeah he he dude this is why I love Asians I love
00:17:19
Asians okay good this is seriously you know you're my favorite people on Earth he's an Uber driver he was in the non-
00:17:24
Uber Lane he was in the the lane he's not supposed to pick people up in cop comes over starts yelling at him
00:17:29
pretends he doesn't speak English he was like um uh I I I uh I I I I I and the
00:17:36
guy's like what don't you understand I'm calling the cops and he's like I I I I I I I I I then we get in the car he's like
00:17:42
sorry about all that it's the best genius it's the best and what because other if the guy says
00:17:48
anything he's racist yeah you being racist to the guy he's just an Uber driver doesn't speak English perfect I
00:17:54
wish I could still do that you can you can get away with it I can't cuz sometimes people know who I am so you never know no I guess but back in the
00:18:00
day you could do it all the time all the time like during [ __ ] Virginia Tech what do you think I
00:18:06
did Meo yeah Korean I Chinese right you could do that yeah
00:18:13
yeah not anymore you're too famous you're too famous no I'm yeah I get asked about people ask about you so much
00:18:19
now it's like uh they love you dude really pissing me off I was telling you that yesterday D they love you that's
00:18:24
nice it is nice it is nice isn't it yeah eat your pizza
00:18:29
I want to know what's going on in your world for real though take a bite no take a bite what is
00:18:35
this I saw
00:18:40
[Applause] her this is
00:18:47
fantastic this is fantastic I too love Chinese
00:18:53
food I too love Chinese food I know you too I too I I too love chines yeah but
00:19:02
you know five years where she's gonna be
00:19:08
where there's it's a fetish oh yeah in five years dude she
00:19:13
can be living in [ __ ] Thailand dude really she have long fairing nail all painted [ __ ] pink hot pink wow right
00:19:19
she's going to have a weird surgery she is she is yeah yeah you
00:19:25
think this girl that's the path she's taking yeah yeah she's going to have a boyfriend that has a moped for sure get
00:19:31
done beep beep beep right and this is a this is a this is a fetish intro to
00:19:36
fetish it's also a dark path she leading really we have to stop it now we have to
00:19:41
cut this off no I think you got to let her run oh you do yeah why well you like
00:19:46
white girls why can't other why can't Chinese guys have white girls that's so you're blocking Chinese from
00:19:52
getting white c i don't yeah you only like it if it was I like C and food that
00:19:58
would be better is not that song doesn't exist it doesn't yeah allice and gold allice and gold it's a deep okay well
00:20:05
it's from a long time ago Billboard Hot 100 singles what the [ __ ] wow it endered the Billboard Hot 100 singles dude click
00:20:12
on her profile where is she now yeah where is she now I bet you she's in Thailand she released another
00:20:18
single it did not chart it was just the alphabet a portion of
00:20:24
it God w she does know that someone already
00:20:30
captivated that market you know yeah AB bcde e FG the guy that wrote that ad AB
00:20:36
BC d e f g h a j k l o p q r s t v WX YZ billionaire really billionaire I don't
00:20:44
even know if I know the song Anymore a b c d e there's another song about ABCD FG
00:20:51
too what is it a b c d e f you and your
00:20:56
mom and your sister who whoa whoa whoa whoo W dude I don't like that kind of stuff I like tog I don't like that kind
00:21:02
of stuff F you and your mom and your sister yeah what about your brother and your dad I think she also says that yeah
00:21:09
she got to get the whole family what's that that I don't like it's the video that's the music video for
00:21:15
what hey oh yeah you were wrong about the fetish oh yeah well I wasn't
00:21:22
wrong it went it went darker than I thought right yeah now I know what
00:21:28
happened right it was like Asians were her like you know um cigarette right
00:21:34
right the intro as was right you she's like 14 you know yeah I like Chinese
00:21:39
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bfri is Asian fetish really bad like what if they really like love the person
00:25:29
it's impossible to like Asians that much it's incredible it's impossible to like Asians that much no I mean that's not
00:25:35
true to say that it's impossible to love as much is not a truth it's the most
00:25:42
insane thing I've even course kidding um no what do you mean is it is it bad to
00:25:48
do to fetishize like they have an Asian fetish but once they meet up and like
00:25:53
get together they actually love the person of course you're well fetish they
00:25:58
just like they just also just like the Asian but he said when you say fetish I think he's saying when you fetishize
00:26:04
something it's almost like you doesn't make any sense to me you don't respect you only like
00:26:10
peanuts is that right zoom in and you're eating peanuts it's a desire with
00:26:15
gratification strongly linked to a particular object act activity the part of the body other than the sexual org
00:26:21
organs so you have a fe you're fetishizing something yeah but without the race or whatever that is you
00:26:27
wouldn't like you wouldn't like them right so you like the that's that has to be the you know a part of it do you have
00:26:35
any fetishes is there a white fetish well I mean I feel like numbers don't
00:26:40
lie you know what I mean we're doing pretty good oh really the girl that used to met yesterday would you think she was white no but I'm just saying what was
00:26:47
she last yesterday Mexican exactly thank you I'm just saying but yes there's a white fetish for minorities to like
00:26:52
whites there's of course a white fetish there's there's minority women that that have fetishes for white there's a girl
00:26:57
that now that her previous last four boyfriend she's white have been Asian
00:27:03
yeah either half or full right this goes this goes both ways on all sides okay everyone has a if that's your flavor the
00:27:11
Kardashians they only date black guys except for the one which one I don't
00:27:16
know the name there's one girl that doesn't play DI black gu she's married to the guy the the white guy on the show Courtney yeah MH oh Travis Barker I mean
00:27:25
he painted himself enough oh my god with some what you what
00:27:30
what are you trying to say I got it he has so much tattoos that he's trying to be black or he's not or
00:27:36
he's not white anymore completely white yeah yeah Jesus Christ Jesus Christ look at that that is that is legit yeah
00:27:43
that's all of them that's all of them you think that's sexy yeah wow you're
00:27:49
full you ever go to a tattoo out he goes you're full yeah yeah yeah you're done the tattoos on the head thing is
00:27:54
mind-blowing to me that would hurt so much well you had a tattoo right no but I it doesn't hurt the head tattoo got to
00:28:01
hurt I don't know and people go hurt it doesn't have you had a tattoo no it doesn't really hurt that much the the head's got to hurt look at this the
00:28:07
temple the eyeballs maybe but not the head right this Temple is so sensitive oh maybe maybe you're right I mean I
00:28:13
don't want it I'm not going to do it I just can't I don't I can't imagine the head the most sensitive
00:28:20
areas are your neck your vagina your butthole the back of your front of your knees and your feet yeah yeah that's why
00:28:29
when you see those um is it the tongue the mayori is it the mayori people that get the oh all right that is in that is
00:28:36
must be so painful right here because it goes from your lip to your neckline do people get them on their gums people get
00:28:42
them in their mouth all the time on the gums they say they it's it doesn't hurt in here yeah it doesn't hurt you don't
00:28:49
have any tattoos are you oh wow look at that no but I have a that looks cool dude you have a what the black that has
00:28:55
the tattoo that looks like you why cuz I have gingervitis what are you
00:29:00
talking about dude dude this guy do you have what's wrong with you today I already told you I have a bad some bad
00:29:06
things are happening and then you're like I only listen and then you're just attacking me like that he's not attacking you you do have
00:29:13
gingivitis do I does it look like I have black thums no honestly no they're like brown yeah yeah but is that bad they're
00:29:20
not black they're not black they're Mexican I know but I know but have you looked at no I'm not being paranoid your teeth look totally normal to yeah so you
00:29:26
never cuz you never said anything like hey dud you should get that let me see smile you have great teeth yeah but what the [ __ ] are you saying then he's just
00:29:33
egging you on a joke about that I'm sorry okay he think you ever do you ever go to the
00:29:38
dentist no yes the guy from Glendale whatever you You' seen that guy right
00:29:44
yeah yeah I like him how often it's been like eight years but yeah though there's a tooth hanging
00:29:50
out right now put it back in yeah yeah be honest with me yeah have you flossed ever I flossed lately yes now get it
00:29:56
every day I I've been trying to yet how many days a week really because of the beef
00:30:02
well what so in Hawaii they had that dried beef jerky they have like crispy
00:30:08
beef jerky chips I love that right yeah but for some reason they get lodged in between my teeth and they stay in there
00:30:14
for like 3 days no no no no buddy you got to floss it out I know but so one had been and she and I was with somebody and she was like it smells like that
00:30:20
beef jerky I haven't had beef jerky in 3 days you're like I know isn't it good yeah yeah and then so and then I realized there was like in between my
00:30:27
teeth beef so I fost him outou that happens that's not embarrassing that happens all the time beef jerky in the
00:30:34
teeth that's that's that happens to all of us all the time yeah okay you're not
00:30:40
alone on this island yeah yeah you feel better I guess you're right thank you yeah I just you
00:30:47
know you attack me with that who me no he's attacking the [ __ ] out of you today what's your what's your deal why are you
00:30:53
so uh uppity and throwing darts at people I don't know I just feel good you feel
00:31:00
oh is that what it is when you feel good you like to attack huh yeah yeah it's so funny but it's never him though have you
00:31:05
noticed that and I'm not complaining I'm grateful to be here but I'm just saying I love the show and I love you guys but
00:31:10
it just I just kind of I look at it and I go why a him why not him I mean he talks [ __ ] about me yeah but he never
00:31:16
not on the show though not around yeah yeah when I'm not around you're go hey Andrew your Skin's too pink go ahead cuz
00:31:22
Tito uh Tito Andrew is scarier than you thank you thank oh that's right so if
00:31:28
everyone let's get into that if people don't know about the show what's your what are you doing with your face I'm
00:31:34
just waiting to hear what you have to say right so the power dynamics of the show is what here we go here we go so
00:31:42
the power of the Dynamics of the show is um Andrew is let's suppose that this is a kingdom right that he would be the you
00:31:49
know um The King The False King right he's like you the false King
00:31:57
he's King but not like blood he he does have Royal Blood that's a redhead thing
00:32:04
no it's not a redhead attack like I'm not born pure wow like I'm a mut well the blood's not pure no okay yeah and
00:32:12
that's not you're the king I just gave you the props and what are you that's exactly what I'm saying I'm the
00:32:18
king okay I have pure blood dude you yeah yeah but I let you you know mean sit on
00:32:25
the throne right let him s on the throat and I'm like kind of like you know who I am Louie the 15th no Aragorn I don't
00:32:34
know who that is from Lord of the Rings he's supposed to be the King right Strider right I'm supposed to be king
00:32:39
but I'm out you know what I mean defend you do have a lot of similarities to Kings
00:32:45
bloated gout ridden yeah but here's the there we go okay look up fattest king
00:32:53
yeah there you are beep bop boop yellow ironically
00:32:59
there you are yeah yeah okay Henry VII right he was a glutton isn't it wasn't Henry VII like the fattest [ __ ] king
00:33:05
of all time that's him that's look at the size of this moose yeah half asian
00:33:12
so anyway let's be real you're the king you're the real King no here's the power dynamics of the show okay is um you are
00:33:20
the boss mhm so I know it's a 50/50 Enterprise
00:33:27
mhm but I I let you I I don't let you you make most of the
00:33:32
decisions am I not right let's be honest someone has to get up and do it exactly and I let you do it no no I have to do
00:33:38
it you have to do it if I don't do it it doesn't happen but I also go do it no you never have told me yeah I go get it
00:33:45
no you say you're too lazy to do it it's not that's not it that is 100% true no I'm a guy that goes you know what I mean
00:33:52
I understand but I'm going to let him have make the decisions that's not true you don't have you don't have the know
00:33:57
of the wherewithal in fact you don't even communicate with your [ __ ] assistant of your own schedule how could you make decisions if you don't even
00:34:03
know how to schedule your own life I purposely do that so I give you the [ __ ] no you do that cuz you're [ __ ] lazy I'm not here dude bro you started this
00:34:10
I'm not you [ __ ] started all this F [ __ ] dude I'm not dude I'm did I start this I'm not I'm not you [ __ ] started
00:34:16
it I'm not starting anything I'm just telling you what the power dynamics of the show I want to I'm letting the people know how the show is run they
00:34:23
know they know they all [ __ ] know okay I want to I don't know do you think
00:34:29
they think that's what I don't know and I want to know you think they think the SLE slept King is the
00:34:34
organizer they know not okay they know not to know they know not to know yeah
00:34:39
okay they know that you are a beautiful entity that needs its beauty rest right and I like to organize right so you're
00:34:45
the organizer right it is a 50/50 Enterprise 100% wa why you laughing on
00:34:53
camera oh what are you saying off camera it's not oh off camera you don't you
00:34:58
don't organize any of this [ __ ] no but it's a 50/50 talent wise yes talent wise yeah we're yeah you're my brother right right
00:35:05
well and also okay 4545 10 right she's very talented such
00:35:12
an she's an important part of the show and these three guys take him or leave them yeah and then these guys act as
00:35:17
buffoons puppets no these guys act as a very intrical part of the organization
00:35:23
we need them we need them very much so um in terms of my relationship with them it's they they they're pretty much aside
00:35:30
from Andreas these two are more handlers for me you're the wacky Uncle who comes
00:35:36
into town so what this is what he this is what pissed me off today I I I'm going to just go get into it let's get into it I'll show it I'll show it right
00:35:42
here dog so shoot move to 7:30 tonight he says but then I emphasized it two
00:35:47
hours later cuz he did with exclamation marks which made me mad yeah you know you can't do that you can't do that it
00:35:52
doesn't make sense you because then I I said to you that like he already gave me the information yeah I know I just like
00:35:57
I don't act as you know I I'm in direct contact with him 24/7 oh what about David
00:36:03
Spade I slept through that I made a mistake but it has nothing to do with me not knowing I I would get in trouble for
00:36:09
that is what I'm saying so I wanted to be on top of it Andrew would get mad at me if you were here at a weird time okay
00:36:16
I don't know why you brought up Spade that was a bad move it was it was it was evidence cuz why are you poking the bear
00:36:22
you're poking the bear dude cuz he was really he was should I get mad she get mad yeah
00:36:28
yeah yeah yeah you're poking the bear dude else why' you bring that up bro what did you do before the shoot what
00:36:33
shoot you peed on this one we're on right now I can't
00:36:39
believe bro bro bro I can't believe that you are you're soaked with
00:36:46
lies dude you're the lying [ __ ] gesture in this Kingdom you're the lying gesture dude and you dude some people
00:36:53
you're Guillotine dude bro in the medieval times You' be the guillotine what are you trying to accuse me of
00:36:58
peeing on the court Jesters uh coach
00:37:04
okay say what you're claiming yeah what are you claiming he peed on my Mercedes that he bought me basically he peed on
00:37:10
your car that I bought do you have any proof of this uh I took a video of Andre
00:37:16
looking at a puddle and we can go lick it and see if it tastes like PE send Mone out there to lick it go lick
00:37:23
no wait a minute you're claiming that Bobby urinated on your vehicle yeah and like where you would pump the
00:37:29
gas too so I have to touch that area now Bob did you pee on his car did you you saw me here right I didn't see you pee
00:37:35
on his car I know but did you see yeah so youve had your eyes on me the whole time I've seen you the whole time you were you the cigarette I didn't see it I
00:37:42
didn't see that and Cas is closed and that apologize I just feel like the in
00:37:47
this kingdom is so corrupt no apologize dude for for being
00:37:53
soaked in lies I'm a Menendez brother now dude you're I want to watch i't seen the do I'm going to do it I can't wait to see it I'm going to watch it tonight
00:37:59
but I apologize please interesting no dude I can't you peed on my car I I didn't pee on your
00:38:05
car dude you know what I feel that's [ __ ] insane I didn't pee on your car
00:38:10
you're telling everyone pee I did not pee on your car that's illegal too public Expos it's public indecency or
00:38:16
whatever that's insane apologize Sun wasn't even apologize you be be your car
00:38:21
apologize I'm sorry sir okay I peed on your car [ __ ] I peed on your car dude I
00:38:27
peed on your car that was a good liar yeah yeah hey what what I was just going to say that D Babi has a tendency to do
00:38:34
that because he even pees on a cup in his room yes he will pee in a cup in his
00:38:39
room okay what sometimes no what are you saying well that's next level right I
00:38:47
don't pee in the cup in my room that's crazy went in the garage in your gaming room where I have to clean okay back
00:38:54
then I did you're saying the past a couple years ago yeah yeah because it was so far down and I'm playing listen
00:39:00
when you're playing war zone with your with with your fire team you can't walk
00:39:06
away right and I'm like I and I have to pee real bad I'm like hold up right and I'm like I'll Crouch down and then I'll
00:39:14
you know pee in a cup I'm here I'm still here right and then I'll pee and then
00:39:19
I'll go I'll do this later what kind of cup like a sometimes it was like C no like a sometimes a coffee cup but some
00:39:26
also like sometimes like empty bottle of water like plastic wow you can get it in there
00:39:42
yeah yeah have a thin dick dude all right I have a thin dick right that that's rude I've seen it it's great all
00:39:47
what you're doing is rude I didn't I'm sorry he did pee on your car it was very
00:39:53
funny we were laughing so as a joke I go where the laugh is he do he goes right for the laugh yeah
00:39:59
yeah then be honest on your side if we're going to be honest over here that he peed on your car he did not pee on he peed on your
00:40:06
tire yeah he peed on your wheel no well am I wrong I think you are actually
00:40:11
where did he pee just above the tire and it hit the body of the car I wanted to get the whole
00:40:18
tire I only half a tire dude if you don't if you don't he's right though you start at the top well cuz angle wise it
00:40:23
has to go I see sense okay sprinkle yeah I mean I I could have opened the door and peed inside it was that would would
00:40:31
that wouldn't have been bad that would have been bad yeah yeah you're welcome then thank you it was unlocked yeah he
00:40:36
could have crossed the line there yeah I'm sorry for where's the weirdest uh place you've
00:40:42
peed what's the Strang in a mouth you have peed in someone's mouth have you peed on have you peed on
00:40:49
somebody yeah you've done that yeah and they said please pee on me they were like into I know where I peed and I
00:40:54
can't say God I'm going to get trouble for this please I'm going to and please I'm G to get in so much trouble
00:41:01
this please Auto blow AI Ultra yall I
00:41:07
brought home an auto blow and I haven't left the house in eight days okay autoblow AI Ultra is the
00:41:14
world's best [ __ ] machine okay I mean the old way of doing
00:41:19
things it's over man it's the old way of doing it is moving your arm up and down over and over again you know I mean as
00:41:26
if you're like vong Cloud Jam van jams right but it's boring Auto blow AI Ultra
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not only moves the stroker for you oh my God it does do it for you for sure but it syncs up with a free included video
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00:41:47
basically what I'm trying to say is the machine does what the screen is doing and it connects and then there's like
00:41:52
stuff that happens easy with Wi-Fi connection to access free video sync features it's like your own personal
00:41:59
synced PornHub it even scks with VR videos Man boy does it special free
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downloadable stroking modes for men with short penises not for me that's not for
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me I use the long one special series of sleeves for men with very large penis that's the one I used the spe the
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bfri I peed at the in right on the side of the stage no
00:43:38
way no way yeah because have you been there yeah so you have to walk to the backstage there's no bathroom back there
00:43:45
so the only way to go to the bathroom is the front of the [ __ ] venue and you had to pee so bad so I'm back there and
00:43:51
they're about to bring me up and I'm like oh [ __ ] I got to pee and I just peed on the wall wow yeah a lot as much
00:43:59
as I peed on his car that's a lot that was a lot a huge puddle and in my mind I was like on while I was on stage I was
00:44:05
like I'm going to clean it when I get off I I was going to spray it down what with what what there's a hose nearby no
00:44:11
like a empty like a bottle of water or whatever was just to wash wash it away yeah yeah and I completely forgot well
00:44:16
you know now sorry yeah but I love that club please I'm I'm going to work it again I'll never do that again okay okay
00:44:23
okay where's the weirdest place you've peed I'm a girl I can't just be anywhere I wish I had a dick no you don't wish
00:44:30
you did had a dick like a dick um yeah dick tube yeah dick piss tube you guys
00:44:35
should have a piss tube they make those oh that's cool that's cool you're going to get one of those yeah mask that is
00:44:42
very cool that's pretty cool you pee anywhere yeah I was on a radio station once and I I my my ass crack was so
00:44:49
exposed on their white couch then it left a brown streak right and so then the next time I was at the radio station
00:44:56
they got a new out but they cut out the streak and they framed the [ __ ] that's really cool it was really in my
00:45:02
honor would you ever would you ever get a piercing on your balls that would be cool to the on my balls yeah people
00:45:10
pierce our nuts all the time no no no the Prince Albert goes through your wiener but the other one just goes
00:45:15
through your balls scrotum piercing that'd be tight a little a little dumbbell right there or a little
00:45:22
just like a little nose ring but on your oh okay on your balls W there's like a porn guy that I remember that has wait
00:45:29
go back to that other one there's a porn guy that has uh piercings in a weird way that could be like Dune part three's
00:45:35
[ __ ] poster you know weird right right Dune three you know what I mean Dune well
00:45:41
that' be Dune two who look at those Hills what that's Dune two two rings D rings yeah yeah wow look at that okay I
00:45:47
that's a this is a thing that oh my God no thanks yeah pass I pass on that you
00:45:54
know what we should do we should get your tongue pierced Bob no I'm not please no I'm not getting piercings to
00:45:59
that that's a stupid thing how about your nose no I don't want to do any of that your septum you'll never see yeah I'm not in what ear I've had him pierced
00:46:07
oh when did you have your ear pierced right here this one you can even feel the um cartilage right here I never knew you with an ear piercing what you never
00:46:13
were earring when I met you no I did it in when I was 17 that's rad huh bad boy
00:46:19
was it both Pier or just one what both or just one just one yeah yeah left side and then my dad was like just so mad
00:46:26
about it we're we EA B and poop and he looks at it he go oh you're
00:46:33
gay like I'm not gay no you gay he kept saying that yeah he's right yeah why was
00:46:39
it that your left side was not gay your right side was gay when we were a kid why was that a whole thing both was fine
00:46:45
left was fine right was gay who started that that's something that she doesn't
00:46:51
know about no yeah when we were kids if you had one in your right ear only it was gay if you had one in your left it
00:46:57
was straight but if you had both it was totally fine oh it's called the gay ear myth signaling signaling oh Rich history
00:47:04
of juler being shown off to show wealth nobility or status but then it was used to show off SE sexual preference that's
00:47:11
cool so this was like a code it was like tipping I see yeah interesting the
00:47:17
effects of the gay ear it became common for men to secretly communicate their sexuality by wearing
00:47:23
an earring in their right ear by the '90s it become so widely accepted as a secret code that it was Artic about in The New York Times after that there
00:47:28
weren't many questions about which year was the gay ear left or left for straight men right for gay men
00:47:34
interesting but you know who can pull it off without sexual orientation ties who black dudes there'd be black dudes When
00:47:40
We Were Young that would have a right earring in and no one would say anything yeah D I just got a [ __ ] text make me
00:47:45
so mad what is it I left $3,000 in my
00:47:50
hotel cash yeah why did you have $3,000 cash in your hotel loves cash I love
00:47:57
cash what would you need three grand for well because sometimes my cards don't
00:48:03
work how much are you eating like a lot well like I don't
00:48:10
you're not going out drinking you're not going out gambling yeah like what do you need that much cash for there's no chance you're spending three grand on
00:48:16
dinner it's safety you want to I feel safe you well you should feel unsafe cuz
00:48:22
you just lost it well no I left it in the safe I left in the safe
00:48:27
that makes me feel how do they know did somebody open the safe and find it no I left the hotel came back to LA and I go
00:48:33
[ __ ] I left $3,000 of the safe they're never going to give it back to you so I just then we went out to them and goes
00:48:40
here's this code there's some money in there and they're like well we'll just put it back into his credit card can
00:48:46
they do that I think maybe I mean that seems strange could they do that can
00:48:52
they do that probably it seems it seems shady it see but it's the Ritz oh
00:48:59
they'll do it for you they'll do it right they'll do it for yeah they're a high-end a festar hotel would do it any other stars you're not getting so that I
00:49:05
should do that I think that's fine or they say we'll send you a check but I'll just put it back into the thing then put
00:49:10
it back into the thing okay okay good put it back into the thing yeah here's another thing I I and this is a dangerous path I'm going to just show
00:49:16
you because I have I don't know what else to talk about take me down that road this is what I've been doing all
00:49:24
day I'm pretty sure what is that send the photo to Carlos
00:49:30
Jules what's been going on with you though is there any new news to share um
00:49:35
I think I have narcolepsy really really yeah tell me
00:49:40
about the narcolepsy well my my aunt she also has narcolepsy and she gave me um a
00:49:47
medicine for it and then she just said to try this cuz I always cuz I'm always so tired I feel so heavy in the morning
00:49:54
and I just like my brain is just always so empty have you ever fallen asleep while driving no but I can sleep
00:50:01
anywhere immediately like right now you could go to sleep yeah yeah she has a sleep thing for sure so do you no but
00:50:06
she can sleep and like right now so can you that's right yeah what is this thing
00:50:12
guess I mean is it a mold of your penis are you molding your penis no no I'm not molding your penis no huh this is what
00:50:18
I've been making what have you been making it's Cava dude you're making
00:50:25
Cava yeah d dude what the [ __ ] are you talking about Cava dude what Cava the
00:50:30
root what are you doing are you making drugs is this new drug it's not a drug no drugs I don't know about it's not a
00:50:36
drug I'll tell you what happened so I'm in Hawaii okay and I'm with Jean MH
00:50:42
you're my buddy jeene yeah yeah yeah and we're at the Cove The Cove yeah the best
00:50:48
aai BS don't you think m in Hawaii okay okay so you know we're regulars there so
00:50:54
you know they they come up to us and here's some of this it's like a glass of like muddy water uh-huh that Cava yeah
00:51:00
and I drank it and we were both like you you're not high but we were
00:51:07
just like yeah it's supposed to it's a calming agent the calming agent wow and so I got some Cava and I brewed some at
00:51:14
home so it's a root it's a Cava Ro and you break it down in you don't get high did you strain that in you're supposed
00:51:19
to strain it but I didn't have um a c cloth strainer cheesecloth yeah clth
00:51:26
called yeah so I used a t-shirt I thought it's the same kind of
00:51:33
theory drinking Cava during recovery is it a relapse is it no it's not nope it
00:51:39
it can affect the brain similarly to alcohol and narcotics but um it could be helpful tool in
00:51:45
managing Cravings right yeah alternative to consuming alcohol ilicit drugs it's a healthy alternative so I drank some last
00:51:51
night before I went to bed and I slept for like 14 hours give me some of your cava dude Cava is the best dude Bobby
00:51:58
Cava yeah I'm Bobby Cava yeah I'll give you the powder you can make it at home got it yeah yeah I can make it myself
00:52:05
you don't have to go buy cavar root somewhere no I have the powder did you order it off Amazon or something no I got it at the Cove oh you brought it
00:52:11
back yeah yeah I brought it back with me did you uh did you clarify that when you got to the Border oh yeah you didn't
00:52:17
declare it did well now you've outed yourself oh yeah arrest me for Cava powder but you can buy can you buy some
00:52:22
Cava powder here online yeah it's totally legal right legal yeah yeah but
00:52:28
it it was it really helped me with my sleep I took mushrooms the other night that helped me with my sleep W it was
00:52:34
great I had taken mushrooms in a long a lot no just a little bit we had just a little something something it really jazzed me up yeah do you perform with it
00:52:41
we no no no we were in the woods oh oh why is it when you're super drunk you call me cuz I love you but it's weird I
00:52:49
love you and then whenever you're call you're with friends you always go hey my little Chinese guy I didn't say that
00:52:55
something like that yeah hey little man little man you know what I mean no you guys all laugh right like what's up is
00:53:01
not true see now you're lying to the audience no what do you do though I call you but you say little things first of
00:53:06
all first of all when I called you what is it I don't call you all the time like that cuz I don't like to call you when
00:53:11
I'm Dr you call me on stage too I love calling you on stage but I called you cuz I was with friends and we were talking about you and my friends were
00:53:16
saying how much they love you and I was like well I want to call them yeah okay yeah because I always call you back you always well you answered that time and
00:53:23
then um I was in fear for my life for a second of it why I was tripping a little bit oh you were high too seeing things
00:53:31
were you seeing not seeing things I was just feeling the wave oh when you're out just sort of like playing around it it
00:53:39
takes you away from what what is really important I think what's really important the quiet
00:53:46
times like sitting there with a girl looking in your eyes right and sometimes you may be attach heads in bad right and
00:53:55
you know you can make little nicknames ni nicknames mhm hey [ __ ] you know what I mean you kind of
00:54:02
hit your head against her [ __ ] yeah [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] right and
00:54:09
go what so aggressive you too much yeah it's a t it's a love tap it's a love tap
00:54:15
you go hey [ __ ] like that right and they're like ow right sh [ __ ] [ __ ]
00:54:22
quiet yeah [ __ ] quiet right quiet [ __ ] yeah [ __ ] get me no seriously I love you you have
00:54:30
to say that you have to say I love you I love being with you right make me a
00:54:35
sandwich can you please make me a sandwich you missed a quiet time yeah I like those times right and then um let's
00:54:42
get you back or you know when you're watching something with somebody you know you're watching it
00:54:48
like a sunset oh yeah yeah you missed those I missed it
00:54:56
let's put it out to the world last night you know you're ready so I was watching The Penguin last night by myself yeah you know I know you haven't seen it I
00:55:02
haven't but I was going um what an interesting character the penguin yeah and I also thought to myself why isn't
00:55:10
there more more why doesn't Batman have more enemies well the Joker was big it's just
00:55:17
a n because if they're recycling they're recycling through the [ __ ] on all the movies I think the next one I think the
00:55:24
Scarecrow is back for the next one right but look at how many The Joker Hugo Strange penguin scrow Clayface Mr Freeze
00:55:31
manbat uh Bane Killer Croc Twoface Deadshot pois I this is a lot of [ __ ]
00:55:37
en I know but you no but here let me I have a can I say something yeah that's 30 guys I know I understand that but you
00:55:44
can't use the Killer Croc okay how about this then because you can't you know because all the Batman movies now are
00:55:50
based in reality right so it's like you know the Riddler was just a a serial killer okay but Woman made it through
00:55:57
and that's a that but they recycle them okay but cat get some new ones that are human based that's so many yeah what you
00:56:03
know what I mean like their calligraphy razal ghou oh R they're going to use yeah that we already did that okay we
00:56:10
got to find other ones like you know I don't know calligraphy is not a good enemy name black mask what black mask oh that yeah black
00:56:18
mask yeah but he's not W enough what what did you say it's not woke
00:56:24
enough it's got to be woke oh it's got to be yeah white well what if black mask transitioned yeah
00:56:30
yeah yeah yeah hush what if they transition what if they sorry I apologize yeah
00:56:37
manbat yeah you can't do that guy the Philippines yeah yeah yeah that's just a Philippino with wings I come to kill you
00:56:44
Batman you going to go down Batman yeah Batman you die Batman yeah but why do
00:56:49
they always recycle them because if you because nobody look people are afraid of
00:56:54
new property they want the old stuff give them the old [ __ ] they want the stuff they've seen before they want the
00:57:00
stuff familiar with them I guess you're right but we all like the flavor that we know yeah you know yeah like how would
00:57:06
you do poison ivy in this more realism Batman the same way they did Catman cat cat cat she she uses plants to like
00:57:13
poison people she has to be uh the what's it botanist aot yeah okay she's a
00:57:20
botanist and and she literally gives people poison ivy yeah okay you scratch yourself to death yeah good luck with
00:57:27
that without Li a cane yeah here's a okay I've been scrolling a lot here's ones I don't understand why do I always
00:57:34
get the [ __ ] eggs huh what yeah the mother smashing the egg in on a baby's
00:57:40
face that was like [ __ ] a year ago I still get that though Jesus you're behind you're behind yeah yeah so I get
00:57:46
that a lot or I get like riddles I get a lot of riddles can I can I show you a riddle all right here we go
00:57:56
okay riddle me say have you have to say riddle me this why because riddle me
00:58:02
this there riddle me this there's two fathers and two
00:58:09
sons okay Chinese Riddler R this there's two fathers and
00:58:14
two sons that' be really hard for this there's two fathers and two
00:58:19
sons in a car but there's only three people how I feel like Tito Andrew will can answer this he's you know that one
00:58:26
yeah two father there's two fathers and two sons yeah but there's only three people in a car but there's two fathers
00:58:31
and two sons right yeah it's a it's a grandfather a dad and a son right
00:58:37
very you're so good no it's it's really easy logic that's that's right down the road give me a riddle I I could I've
00:58:43
never solved one you've never solved one no no no I get confused go ahead a train is going 30 miles an hour right and it
00:58:51
leaves the station at 6:00 there's no way there's numbers train going wa so I need visuals
00:58:58
I need a visual a train okay this is a train it right the train leaves a station this is a station at 6:00 okay
00:59:04
it's going 30 miles an hour what uh hold on I got hold on hold on hold on I'm
00:59:09
being real hold on hold on hold on no hold on hold on hold on what time 6 o' I
00:59:15
got to put six o'clock right here I put six okay 6 o'cl train train leaves the station at 6 o00 we got to read the six
00:59:21
and it's going to go 30 m an hour oh [ __ ] how do I do 30 and Tucson 30 30
00:59:27
30 m hour and Tucson is 40 mil away what
00:59:32
Tucson Tucson Arizona right here so 6 o' 30 miles Tucson 40 miles away 40 miles
00:59:41
away 3040 how did the train get there at
00:59:49
6:30 wait wait it's going 30 m an hour right but it's 40 m away how do to get
00:59:55
there at 6:30 mhm it's sped up they can can it speed
01:00:01
up I don't know I want to see I want to see this too right now dude if this is a
01:00:06
fake if this is a fake [ __ ] riddle dude yeah I'm going to be so [ __ ] mad
01:00:11
at you dude okay it doesn't make any sense so 30 miles hour and it's 40 well
01:00:17
it gets there because the math just right is right he gets there at 6:30 what's the math well the 40 it'll make
01:00:23
it if you do it what is the math if 30 m hour 40 30 m hour in 30 minutes you can
01:00:29
get there in 30 minutes 40 miles so the math is correct so that's correct okay
01:00:35
he makes it there sure is that it yeah that's the riddle of course he yeah of course he makes it there so I got it you
01:00:42
got it oh good dude that's is that a real riddle it's not you made it up yeah I did give me a real one dude I'm not
01:00:49
filled with riddles give me a real riddle look get me one on me online riddle me this yeah yeah riddle me this
01:00:54
dude all right here we go give me a real riddle don't look up at the screen okay you don't look either cuz you
01:00:59
you're going to be my problem solver oh my kids can make it but can never hold it or I got to sit next to her yeah get
01:01:06
over there hold on he'll flip the cam look at me riddle
01:01:14
Squad these are by the way these are riddles for kids that I'm reading okay these are for kids all of you should be
01:01:20
able to figure it out all let's go let's go all right zoom in okay do one okay what can kids make but can never hold it
01:01:28
or see it what do kids make that they can't hold or see fart
01:01:36
laugh laugh laugh fart they're both right noise noise okay so you're one for
01:01:41
one for riddles okay okay very very good riddle Squad USA let's go what question
01:01:47
can you never answer yes to oh did you ever kill
01:01:52
anybody no you could easily answer yes to that you know I didn't though yeah but it's possible it's not
01:02:00
possible I will never do it what question could you never answer yes to
01:02:05
it would be impossible to even say yes oh are you
01:02:12
dead that pretty close are you asleep yet yeah that's good are you dead is even better don't look at the [ __ ]
01:02:18
okay dude where are you at I was thinking where the [ __ ] are you at dude you're running a race and at the very
01:02:24
end you pass the person in second place what place did you second second second second [ __ ] wait wait she's right she's
01:02:30
right she's right she's right wait I didn't even get it ask it what has 13 Hearts but no other
01:02:36
organs 13 Hearts but no other or aroke very good is it AR choke it's not
01:02:44
that's really good a food 13 Hearts 13 Hearts but no other
01:02:49
organs dir Hearts can you give a clue
01:02:57
Oh cards deck of cards yeah it was not more than a clue I like just told you what it was yeah yeah yeah all right
01:03:02
here we go not a clue I'm light as a feather yet the strongest person can't hold me for five minutes what am
01:03:10
I breath yeah Bob that was so fast that's really good I'm [ __ ] a math
01:03:17
you're a math Wiz don't look at the screen what has many many needles but
01:03:22
doesn't ever seow hey it's a pine tree but that's we'll
01:03:29
take it what kind of band never plays music rubber a rubber
01:03:36
band honestly you suck you suck you haven't got one of these these are for you these are for is it rubber band
01:03:42
really the thing yeah a rubber band okay one more one more one more what gets bigger you did you see it you saw I
01:03:48
swear to what gets bigger the more you take away it has something to do with feelings I want it to be yeah yeah yeah
01:03:56
like when you take away bigger yeah yeah it's like you
01:04:01
know your your rage gets bigger mean when you leave more oh you know what I
01:04:08
mean like a woman leaves and you get bigger rage and you're whole in your heart wow right so so love you're so
01:04:16
close though ironically you're so close well I think I it's something like that you said it yeah yeah what is it a hole
01:04:24
huh a hole got there I got there organically in a weird way yeah yeah I
01:04:29
got there this is great okay this is dumb yeah I I'm trying different things
01:04:34
no it's really good do you guys watch K drama here we go do I watch K drama what
01:04:41
is that Korean shows give me K dramas okay I'm watching this one judge from
01:04:46
hell it's called judge from hell yeah so she's basically a judge but um that's
01:04:53
hor and he's a a demon went inside her body and her task is to
01:05:00
kill 10 murderers who who doesn't repent no regrets about anything that they do
01:05:07
and it's so cool wow wow is it all in Korean yeah but there's some titles yeah
01:05:12
I hate reading yeah I really I I can't yeah we have that it we have that in
01:05:18
America it's called Judge Judy Judge Judy yeah oh it's the same thing exact same you know you ever seen Judge Judy
01:05:24
no I'll tell you about Jud Judy tell him about that's not a demon yes yes it a demon a
01:05:29
demon and it's look at her hand she curses she curses yeah that
01:05:35
she's not lifting her hand the demon is so she's also been taken over by a demon yeah yeah that's demon [ __ ] that's demon [ __ ] yeah she's dark she's dark anyway
01:05:43
there's another Korean one what about the one have you seen the North Korean one what's it called what not it's called fly by what's it plane the lady
01:05:50
that crashes the plane crash landing Crash Landing a Korean show about North Korea no so this lady let me get I
01:05:56
haven't seen that but this lady right is on a plane she crashes in North Korea and then she falls in love with a North
01:06:01
Korean Soldier does she not it's not it's not a plane she was on a
01:06:07
parachute she jumped out of a plane right oh so she just jumped from the ground no she jump from the ground up as
01:06:14
if she's [ __ ] Superman and then she [ __ ] fell down Korea what happened it's the one where you use the win you run
01:06:22
and then you paring paragliding yeah that oh yeah this that makes sense
01:06:28
honey honey yes let go lighting today I Rob to but you know where I like to go
01:06:35
do it the DNZ yes yes at the DNZ we go to DNZ yeah because you know we love to
01:06:42
parag On the Border the wind is a strong yeah yeah oh honey what going oh oh
01:06:50
no makes no sense there was a storm oh a storm oh you're oh really yeah and then
01:06:58
she was she's paragliding on a storm lands in North Korea and then what happens she meets a North Korean Soldier
01:07:05
yeah but she has to hide you think there's a there's a hot North Kore you think there's a hot North Korean [ __ ]
01:07:11
solders standing there this guy's hot this guy's hot but he's South Korean yeah yeah yeah that's the trick dude he
01:07:18
looks like he's been eating yeah he looks healthy you think North Koreans shoulders are eating no
01:07:25
dude there's a [ __ ] dude there's a North Korean there's a North Korean Instagram
01:07:31
site and I get into my feed what's it called I don't know but it's it's it's it's like basically they're Mak so
01:07:37
basically it's like this who says there's no disco Tex in North Korea and they'll show disco oh it's like the
01:07:43
government the government who says there's no um Burger King in Korea and
01:07:49
then it's like is that it said North Korea doesn't have
01:07:54
McDonald's yes North Korea has an even better version of the American fast food chain
01:08:02
do you think they build this on a stage do you think it's on like a Sound Stage there's people there's actors sometimes that and they get hamburgers and they
01:08:08
don't know what to do with it so they they they open it up they go what is this right and it's like they you know I mean it's their government you can tell
01:08:14
that there's people going eat it like behind the camera and they get [ __ ] scared you know I mean so crazy go back
01:08:21
to that video though click on the profile see other all those videos what are you doing dude who said North Korea
01:08:26
doesn't have marriage nobody said that no one ever
01:08:32
said they don't have marriage there but look at how nervous he looks nous they're so scared they're so scared
01:08:38
look at them cuz they're going to be beaten after this yeah yeah yeah yeah look at that camera from 19 go go
01:08:43
different yeah yeah what's this one Korea service that's a body was carrying
01:08:52
a man's body yeah yeah and they bought a DHL jacket on Amazon yeah yes
01:08:58
Korea and efficienty it better be efficient they'll kill you if it doesn't get there on time what is yeah who said
01:09:06
Korea maternity hospital who said any of this [ __ ] no one said that go to more go
01:09:13
to more go to more this is insane there's so many cool yeah let's see this General Store
01:09:20
well yeah there's a motorcycle inside of it what the [ __ ] kind of General Store is that
01:09:25
right that looks like a weed shop yeah honey should we get the rice or
01:09:31
should we get a motorcycle yeah we'll take two bag of rice and motorcycle go go go further go
01:09:37
just keep scroll can you go scroll and keep scrolling or no or do you have to do that I think cuz it's not on the phone it's not like the phone oh do the
01:09:43
roller coaster one yeah KET roller oh my God it just falls off
01:09:50
of a cliff on the other side you know what North Korea don't have a cat
01:09:56
a cute cat did you know that we have to build
01:10:01
yeah who said North Korea planes always crash have Automotive Vehicles what
01:10:07
nobody ever thought there wasn't [ __ ] cars there yeah all right Rudy end the
01:10:12
show the right way thank you for being a bad friend very
01:10:20
good wo [Music]
01:10:27
wooo yeah wooo [Music]

Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

  • 70
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  • 65
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  • 60
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  • 60
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Episode Highlights

  • Interactive VIP After Party
    Patreon supporters can join us for a free VIP after party!
    “We'll also be hosting an interactive VIP after party!”
    @ 00m 26s
    October 07, 2024
  • The Dog Attack Incident
    A shocking story about a dog attacked by a coyote, revealing the importance of pet safety.
    “It's so scary and sad though what happened.”
    @ 06m 55s
    October 07, 2024
  • The Power Dynamics of the Show
    A humorous discussion about the roles and responsibilities between the hosts.
    “You're the boss, but I let you make the decisions.”
    @ 33m 20s
    October 07, 2024
  • Peeing in Unusual Places
    A funny exchange about the hosts' experiences with peeing in odd locations.
    “I just peed on the wall backstage!”
    @ 43m 51s
    October 07, 2024
  • The Gay Ear Myth
    Exploring the childhood belief that ear piercings signaled sexual orientation.
    “Left was fine, right was gay!”
    @ 46m 39s
    October 07, 2024
  • Cava and Sleep
    A discussion on the calming effects of Cava and its benefits for sleep.
    “Cava is the best, dude!”
    @ 51m 51s
    October 07, 2024
  • Riddles and Logic
    A playful exchange about riddles and logic puzzles.
    “What has 13 hearts but no other organs?”
    @ 01h 02m 36s
    October 07, 2024
  • Unexpected Finds at the General Store
    A motorcycle inside a general store? That's a surprise!
    “What the [ __ ] kind of General Store is that?”
    @ 01h 09m 20s
    October 07, 2024
  • Shopping Decisions
    Should we get rice or a motorcycle?
    “Should we get a motorcycle?”
    @ 01h 09m 31s
    October 07, 2024
  • A Playful Goodbye
    Ending the show with a humorous twist.
    “Thank you for being a bad friend!”
    @ 01h 10m 12s
    October 07, 2024

Episode Quotes

Key Moments

  • Jazz Musicians Debate00:58
  • Dog Attack Story05:32
  • Coyote Concerns09:11
  • Asian Fetish Debate25:24
  • Peeing Confessions43:32
  • Riddle Time1:01:47
  • General Store Surprise1:09:20
  • Playful Farewell1:10:12

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown

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