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The British Are Coming w/ Dax Flame | Ep 225 | Bad Friends

July 01, 2024 / 01:11:22

This episode features Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee discussing various topics including Andrew's upcoming "Freeze Peach" tour, Fourth of July celebrations, and humorous anecdotes about food and relationships.

Andrew shares details about his tour, which includes cities like Indianapolis, Charlotte, and New York. Bobby and Andrew engage in playful banter about naming hypothetical children and their experiences with food, including barbecue and jumbalaya.

The conversation shifts to a discussion about firearms, where Dax shares his experience at a shooting range. They also touch on the absurdity of prize money in sports, specifically a softball tournament.

As the episode progresses, they critique each other's movies, with Dax providing feedback on the performances and storylines. The humor continues as they joke about their personal lives, including dating and friendships.

Finally, they invite an intern named Delany into the conversation, discussing dating dynamics and the challenges of modern relationships.

TL;DR

Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee joke about food, relationships, and Andrew's tour while critiquing each other's movies and discussing dating dynamics.

Episode

1:11:22
00:00:00
hey bad friends fans I'm coming to see you in the fall I'm doing my tour uh for
00:00:06
my new hour it's called the freeze Peach tour come see me uh I'm going to be in
00:00:11
Indianapolis Charlotte uh Iowa Omaha Kansas City Cleveland St Louis Grand Rapids Detroit Chicago Durham Atlanta
00:00:18
Charleston Philly New York Phoenix San Francisco Boston uh and Minneapolis I'm all over
00:00:24
the place go to Andrew Santino docomo tickets Andrew Santino
00:00:30
are these two idiots a white dude and an Asian dude you two are
00:00:36
disgusting you two or something we're bad friends hey man we good to be
00:00:49
here that's me eating a dog that was our barbecue yeah that's our fourth of July barbecue that's a dog on the grill say
00:00:55
eight of them well happy 4th of July D I want to name a baby Bucky
00:01:00
I want to name another baby Jiminy like Jiminy Cricket but Jiminy we got it yeah yeah yeah I want to name another baby um
00:01:08
um l l l l l n k yeah dude all right
00:01:14
yeah L what else man what else can I do and also I want my last name to be
00:01:20
mcferson L mcferson that's right baby what's up man Bucky Jiminy Jiminy Jiminy
00:01:27
dude like the cricket and lunc mcferson L mcferson man is that your new name no
00:01:32
I can be LK right now bro you're Mr mcferson what's your name right now L is an awkward heavy or stupid person you are that's right that's right man you're
00:01:39
luxurious dude I'm luxurious right now man I'm lking it out right now dog that would be your if you were a Greek
00:01:45
philosopher you'd be luxurious luxurious if you were a Greek mythological character speaking of uh
00:01:51
mythological characters mythological characters Dax Dax I never thought I would ever see you again flame is back I really never the last time I saw I was
00:01:58
like oh that's the last time I see that guy right I'm happy to see you again yeah yeah what's my name again Bobby that's right my name Andrew very good
00:02:05
what are you holding there bud a gun what is that for oh is that for me as a
00:02:10
gift say go ahead and throw it at me go ahead and throw it on the table
00:02:17
there yeah oh my that's not good news pretty dangerous yeah that was pretty dangerous sorry have you ever handled a
00:02:23
gun before Dax um yes uh my friend took me to a shooting range once oh go on and
00:02:29
I shot the guns and um yeah America I feel like you've been to
00:02:36
the ones where they have real human targets you know those ranges man Hunger
00:02:41
Games yeah the Hunger Game range dude wow yeah I mean if you were to shoot somebody not that you would please don't
00:02:47
please don't ever but what kind of person do you think you would shoot someone who deserves it I would
00:02:54
never do it but if it was yeah well like what would I have to do to deserve it yeah I let's not go there okay that's
00:03:00
fine well I mean you know self-defense if you came at him with a gun he'd probably want to shoot you you think so
00:03:07
uh yeah or just try to knock it out of your hands or something you would knock it out of my hands my gone I would try
00:03:13
to do that before anything else I have a guess and I could be wrong but I feel like you might have done when you were
00:03:19
young karate or Taekwondo uh really briefly wait wait I knew it in my no
00:03:25
let's guess which one cuz not both you went to a school that had both um a karate Taekwondo kind of like it's like
00:03:32
a Taco Bell [ __ ] Pizza Pizza yeah yeah karate
00:03:37
Taekwondo yeah and sometimes jiujitsu only on Sundays they do
00:03:44
jiujitsu on Sundays what what was your master's name what the your master the the Sensei what
00:03:51
was his name I don't remember I think I was like four five um okay can can you describe
00:03:57
them um I don't remember him I just remember asking to use the bathroom at
00:04:03
one point and being scared to do that oh you took one class I I think so one
00:04:09
class did you was your instructor Asian I think so I hope so isn't that
00:04:16
kind of shouldn't that be a rule no what rule you'd have to be Asian to be a karate instructor or Taekwondo
00:04:22
instructor yeah but I've had J jalaya made by you know I mean an Asian person not as good the jumal was was pretty
00:04:30
good it's just not as good it just in your mind the the problem with me was I went
00:04:36
to the bathroom and I peaked in the kitchen and there was a Chinese guy back there in aajan restaurant in aajan
00:04:41
restaurant and the all the servers were black so I made the mistake but if you hadn't if I hadn't looked I would have
00:04:48
been like oh that's the best gumai I've ever had here's here's the deal aasan restaurant black or white southern
00:04:53
people I'm I'm in if a Chinese guy is making my jumbalaya I'm out why
00:05:00
what if we I'm not there to eat jumara oh yeah yeah there is a little
00:05:05
bit of jumar yeah yeah I get I want J I want soul food deep you know what maybe
00:05:11
it is possible but how about this I like my Mexican food by Mexicans sure I like
00:05:16
my jumbal by Kajun people and I like my karate instructors to be Asian okay how about this if the karate instructor was
00:05:23
Indian would that be a problem hilarious I know I know anyway um so you
00:05:29
remember if he's Asian I I don't remember for sure yeah can I take my glasses off for a second I'm going to look at your eyes real
00:05:36
quick you you didn't sleep well last night huh uh I think I went to bed a little late what were you doing hold on
00:05:45
oh can we guess yeah let's guess yeah let um give me three you go three we only get one okay one so greedy I know
00:05:51
give me three I'm going to guess you were editing something no okay you were
00:05:56
scrolling uh no what were you doing I watched Ricky
00:06:02
siki you watched the movie I did yeah and then I watched your uh sweet dreams today wow you watch those because why so
00:06:10
that I would have more knowledge of I have never seen sweet dreams
00:06:16
neither have I they were good yeah do you you like the movies yes wow okay interesting what are your problems with
00:06:23
it and and I'm okay um let's be open no PR because I would critic I I would be critical of your movies as well
00:06:30
um in fact when we get home tonight we'll watch 20 what is it the movie was in I've already seen all the movies he's
00:06:35
been in 21 they're all pretty good they are yeah they're better than stuff that we've done I think okay he's done a lot
00:06:41
of big movies thank you yeah I think I think y''s movies are better nope no you're
00:06:46
wrong about that but but give us our criticisms of our films I like this a lot I like this a lot um what of what to
00:06:53
what level rip us to shreds rip be how about this you and I are best friends
00:07:00
and also Brothers what what what the [ __ ] I know I know in this scenario okay
00:07:05
but yeah you're cut out on this wow yeah yeah and just for like two minutes you're going to be not that bring me
00:07:10
back in two minutes I will okay so for right now who no you're not at mime what's
00:07:18
going on no that's not my oh I used the wrong power Flink yeah yeah yeah sorry I have different powers how when you do
00:07:23
that so I'm going to transfer him into your I know we have the same relationship so be very critical and I
00:07:29
I'm an open book no judgment here okay please go ahead if you need help we can help Okay this [ __ ] this [ __ ]
00:07:36
really that zombie movie you're going to do is going to be just as good you think I don't think so what named after Vegas's famous
00:07:43
act why is why is your movie everyone trying to talk me out of not doing it
00:07:49
I've never had I have agents call me I don't even talk to it see like consider reconsider yeah and I'm like yeah but
00:07:55
he's my friend he our friend we've never heard of him we don't like the script we don't like anything about it no so go
00:08:00
[ __ ] yourself okay go ahead Dex um I thought that I was confused why
00:08:08
uh the softball tournament paid so much money to the winners how much did it pay to the winners $80,000 that is an insane
00:08:16
amount of money I that's how much they win for a softball tournament let me tell you something I was in a 16inch no
00:08:22
glove Chicago style softball league when I first moved here the winner got free
00:08:28
chicken wings at the Thirsty Merchant I don't even know what it used to be called yeah that's it we got a you got
00:08:34
Wings yeah 80 grand it it's a Well the budget of the movie was $1
00:08:40
million and they're stretching it out there's a lot of people in the movie I think they should have put some more
00:08:45
money into that because visually it doesn't look like the stakes are high enough is what you're saying 80,000 you
00:08:50
know how exp I didn't write it and I'm not the producer or it made for a good climax thank you no he's saying that's
00:08:56
an absurd thing for a people to win in a I mean look at that cast D all right so that's Johnny Knoxville Theo vaugh you
00:09:04
and whom Shakewell Shakewell yeah interesting that's his name you don't know Shakewell I don't know Shakewell
00:09:12
I'm going to tell you this it's so funny I just I just figured you out just now oh I just had an epiphany he only likes
00:09:18
hip-hop artists if they're thinner zoom into Shakewell don't make fun of sh he's a
00:09:24
good funny guy I'm sure he is well if he's greater I'm sure he is yeah I like my rappers uh not
00:09:31
diabetic I'm sure sh well shaky we're just playing we're jpn he's a rapper he knows he knows go ahead so that's the
00:09:38
only problem or give me another one um do y'all have any suggestions no Dax we
00:09:44
want you to give it to okay I'm fine with I I'm fine what just what you just let's move on performances um maybe
00:09:52
uh huh wait the performances problems yeah is there any performances problems
00:09:57
um let me think um oh no no but there were a couple lines
00:10:03
that felt like they could have been less cheesy huh but the movie was
00:10:10
very I didn't give any compliments yet yeah go ahead give me some compliments no no no yeah yes yes yes no I think we only do disses then the compliments
00:10:17
later no compliments can I I let me S I know what you're about to say the movie was heartfelt yeah let me see that's all
00:10:24
I need to hear how did it do really well it's a heartfelt movie I and I really liked it and think youself right no let's go to Sticky
00:10:30
sticky sticky Nikki go ahead okay wait compliments or no no I don't want any
00:10:37
compliments yeah let's go D okay so for Ricky siki um maybe
00:10:43
um oh maybe they forgave a little too quickly we forgave
00:10:51
Ricky the wives forgave them pretty quickly at the end yes I totally agree
00:10:57
but no compliments oh nice that's the only criticism no I I it's it's appalling it
00:11:05
wasn't as heartfelt that's right as some other movies no it was like a com it so you're saying sweet dreams is more
00:11:12
heartfelt it connected your heart maybe and pulled on your strings a little bit better yeah yeah oh yeah ours was a
00:11:17
comedy so was ours okie dokie all right whatever you
00:11:24
say all right Bud okay bud who directed that sweet dreams my friend Li oh Li did
00:11:29
yeah who did mine was it a [ __ ] like a who was it was it a guy who was yeah
00:11:35
it was a comedy Legend Peter farlay oh [ __ ] that guy did mine this guy is such an [ __ ]
00:11:43
sometimes he's bragging but he does it in a communic way and we forgive them but it's also gross
00:11:49
happy bang bang bang bang thank you so much for for that for that are you going to shoot fireworks for 4th of July are you that guy um I I don't buy them but
00:11:57
if my friends have them I'll it's like weed yeah I'm not going to buy it but I'll smoke it if you got it okay yeah do
00:12:03
you ever you don't ever smoke weed no do you want to uh no would you ever be down to take an edible with me um a small one
00:12:11
like a 5 milligram it's a tiny little high maybe a tiny tiny one yeah what
00:12:18
about a chocolate mushroom we have a bag full of them here uh no not right now
00:12:23
okay you wouldn't do it now it's Fourth of July um well our forefathers did it
00:12:29
yeah they did I I feel like I it just I don't I I don't want it something bad to happen uh like if it goes wrong for me
00:12:35
I'll keep you safe I promise but we you mean having a bad trip yeah okay yeah okay have you had a bad trip before no
00:12:42
no good yeah yeah good you know Dax why didn't you get into
00:12:47
science why don't I get into science why didn't you get into science you look like a scientist I'm not that good
00:12:53
at that oh so God only gave you the look maybe yeah what a bummer but you got he
00:12:59
is the Gate of a scientist what's the Gate of a scientist gate his stride the way he walks dude that's what I'm saying
00:13:05
the look everything about him the the Dess thanks right I'm giving you that adding on I'm giving you that right yeah
00:13:11
his scient he has a scientific gate smell the smell stand up for a second
00:13:16
without just stand let watch how he stands tell me this isn't a [ __ ] scientist right oh my God now stay there for a second put your jacket in the
00:13:23
water down I just like to see how how you science let's see okay do this just
00:13:28
do like you're holding something that's a bun bur that's a beaker that's no that's a bun bur it's a bun burner
00:13:34
what's in your other hand yeah whoa whoa whoa whoa who whoa whoa who that that
00:13:39
belongs in a lab D come on dude what are you doing with that what is that that's green glowing put it in the bun
00:13:44
who dude and then what drink it drink it don't do it don't drink it don't and
00:13:51
then change oh CH that's how he changes into the Hulk
00:13:58
you are a sign just yeah I like you you you you know I
00:14:05
like you I like you so much so too and I watch all your videos online and you've been making some really new good ones by
00:14:10
the way thank you Andrew but can I before you do this can I because we the Hulk thing I'm sorry I've always wanted
00:14:18
to learn how to act in a transformation would you mind transforming for us no I mean let's us
00:14:24
try I've always try wanted to do that i' like to someone to teach us I bit yeah can you teach us about a Hulk
00:14:29
transformation um so I'd say just get into like a you're supposed to be on the verge of like something's making you
00:14:36
angry and you're trying to hold it back all right so let's let's let's go there enti let's do that let's do that let's do that now
00:14:45
yeah and then it slowly creeps up on you that you just can't hold it
00:14:51
back what else there's got to be more there so you're trying really hard to hold it
00:14:58
back because if it comes out it's the worst thing that could happen you are going to freak out no no don't do it I
00:15:05
at my sister's perit so you're keep holding it in and then at the whenever you're at your Breaking Point that's
00:15:10
when you turn like super angry and just let loose let me think of something that really makes me angry oh my God happy fourth happy
00:15:20
fourth do you know what Fourth of July stands for you know what it means no
00:15:25
Independence Day what is that what independence from whom do you know uh Britain why do you know why uh cuz
00:15:33
people came from Britain and then there was like a tea party or something you
00:15:38
got it no taxation without fixations right no taxation without
00:15:47
fixations that's why smoking became a big hit we had oral fixations yeah all kinds of fixations dude no taxation
00:15:53
without fixation therefore guns alcohol cigarettes that's what that freedom
00:15:59
Freedom my friend okay also can I say another thing just a little observation
00:16:05
you kind of look like Paul rier right under me you going to take a midnight ride have you taken midnight rides
00:16:11
before like in my car yeah yeah yeah have you ever yelled out the British are coming no I next time you're driving
00:16:19
around the 101 just open your window and yell out the it's got to be the 101 will you film that send it to us if you yelling the British are coming out your
00:16:24
window yeah I can do that love that that'd be great but but say but say it like they are coming well they are I I
00:16:31
know they are but don't go British are coming whatever you know what I mean like really like they're coming they're
00:16:36
coming from Britain show him with one of the flags you're waving out the window show him what it would be like to yell
00:16:41
out the British are coming being real being very real what's the flag do well it's letting people know that you're uh
00:16:47
you're with us it's me Paul yeah Paul oh yeah yeah so I'm in the car like this right yeah oh [ __ ] don't spill that's a
00:16:55
window mhm I'll do the sound of the window no here no I need here's what somebody has to you know I know what it
00:17:01
is I I check a voicemail that's how I learn about the information I just got a new
00:17:07
voicemail you have one message what that was really funny I
00:17:14
didn't know I thought we G okay ready what the [ __ ] did you think I was GNA [ __ ] do hold on hold up hold up
00:17:22
yeah traffic let me get into this for a while yeah do your thing [ __ ] old
00:17:29
people oh that's Asian [ __ ] my bad okay oh I have a I have a voicemail holy [ __ ]
00:17:36
I've an agro driver you have one new voice message from your
00:17:42
mom Bobby mom to accept press
00:17:49
one oh [ __ ] one Bob I'm in
00:17:55
prison I go away for a long time rob
00:18:05
you hold up hold hold on dude what is she doing in
00:18:11
prison how do I know the British are coming from that that's the key indicator that's
00:18:17
she's that is a code that's her code word think that connection between British people are coming and that so
00:18:24
it's like you have to be more specific no Dax let's do the math oh my God Bob's mom goes to prison let's investigate why
00:18:31
do you think she's there a British person the British person did believe that D of course you truly believe that
00:18:38
DX look at me right now dude right look at me right now dude if your mom called you and says I'm in prison that's what
00:18:45
you would connected the British are coming yeah look at me Dax Dax Dax be
00:18:51
real enough for com be real look at me right now you think so
00:18:57
no I I know right you know what I love about you you can't lie thank you yeah
00:19:03
you haven't heard a second message yeah there's another message oh [ __ ] yeah I think there's a bunch yeah
00:19:10
there's a bunch of messages all right so you have another um well I gotta go
00:19:15
after that mess I gotta my God my mom's in prison again hello uh no I'm
00:19:22
not is that the is that my voice in my it hasn't happened yet let me press the
00:19:28
button malfunctioning it's malfunctioning yeah hold on get to the button no that's my heads you know what I mean that's my other guy in
00:19:35
there all right God my mom's in prison what the [ __ ] again God I got another
00:19:41
message beep hello uh you're in
00:19:48
trouble I'm going to take I'm going to tax you
00:19:53
unfairly uh I'll be at your house when you there get there holy [ __ ] not again not
00:20:04
again the British are [Laughter]
00:20:11
coming dude you're right that was good by the way I wish an English acction would have been nice it was It was kind
00:20:17
of English it would have like brought me back more grounded into the situation I was trying to I don't know it off the
00:20:22
top of my head you don't know okay I I'll do it for you you can drive and I'll I'll do I don't want to do the you be the British now I want to see how
00:20:28
well you do it get a flag I'm the British person no you're you and you're in the car and you hear a voicemail but
00:20:34
do the driving you know what I mean do the let's get into the scene get into it right you have a voicemail whatnot so
00:20:40
yeah yeah that's how you drive yeah good good yeah what is that a Volkswagen what is
00:20:46
that a bug what are you driving oh uh uh Subaru a Subaru okay Outback or
00:20:52
impressed cross track cross track nice yeah but why is the steering wheel like on the side there's a little offc center
00:20:58
it's all right all right okay okay
00:21:03
good oh let him do it no no let let him act and get into do yeah but do the driving and do whatnot and whatever you
00:21:09
do yeah no no how about this I'm going to raise my hand and that's when you do it
00:21:15
I'm the director wait what do I do I'm going to go like this and then the voicemail oh okay all right so just cuz I'm the director I want to see a little
00:21:21
bit of this world here okay okay and I'm just holding this you can do whatever you want but when you when you do yell
00:21:27
out the window need that in your hand so maybe it's on the side okay oh you want to hold it okay oh oh no he can he can
00:21:36
yeah you listening to music or anything nice yeah yeah do you kind of
00:21:42
jam out what is baby don't hurt don't hurt me no more change the
00:21:50
channel [Music]
00:21:56
what yeah baby baby oh you're connected to your ax your ax is still [ __ ] unplug your ax yeah
00:22:04
[ __ ] whatever was on your phone voicemail you have one voicemail to
00:22:11
accept press one listen up here Dex it's me beans on
00:22:17
toast I'm coming for you I'm coming for everything too I'm here too we're coming
00:22:23
to get you we're coming to get you me and my disabled Korean friend are coming to get you what you think about that be
00:22:30
on toast the British are
00:22:37
[Laughter] coming okay I just moved and honestly I
00:22:44
hate finding new doctors it's impossible I don't can I may suggest something to
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00:23:53
do.com Shopify let me tell you something Andrew you know what do we do we have a bu business we have a e-commerce
00:23:59
business right we sell merchandise yes we sell t-shirt everything that you and I do
00:24:06
right is um we have the high we have the we we're with the best we do with the best right so Shopify is the global
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00:25:04
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00:25:10
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your business no matter what stage you're in shopify.com yeah that's good your own choice no
00:25:22
you're doing it you made a choice that's good that's good no one could hear you it's fine doesn't matter he's supposed
00:25:28
to war on the people it's the sentiment that counts because I felt that they were coming how loud do you think Paul
00:25:33
River was yelling that he probably was just pretty loud dude I bet he was just going British British are on their way
00:25:38
oh because he's got to tell he's got to tell a million people lose his voice the first turn in in [ __ ] imagine dude
00:25:44
imagine if he just had Twitter would have to leave the house just tweet it out yeah yeah isn't that really funny to
00:25:49
think when he rode through he rode through the North End in charest toown
00:25:55
and by some point he did lose his voice wouldn't that be so funny that'd be insane sign languages the britiish he sounds
00:26:01
like RFK the Bri I'm in we're in his clothes right
00:26:06
now and I am so uncomfortable you did wash his I'm itchy as no there's no chance he watched this he said you know what he said to me I said this it smells
00:26:12
like you oh it smells I go this collar smells he goes That's cuz it leans up against my window that has Sun hitting it off oh no wow wow wow I bet you
00:26:20
you're one of those [ __ ] that doesn't use [ __ ] detergent what's the point of watching if I'm not going to use deter deterent
00:26:27
your right now it's not Fourth of July dude it's not ju it's fth it's fth of
00:26:33
July it's fth of July it's about a war okay well you're trying to go to war with Bobby that's I thought we're on the
00:26:38
same team you're right all right so regroup all right what I'm saying is is
00:26:44
that what I meant to say is you don't use you know how sometimes you see Mex you smell Mexicans they smell delicious
00:26:50
they smell so clean you go to you go to East LA it it smells so good yeah I
00:26:56
they're always doing laundry hug Frankie konas I hug a little extra
00:27:02
cuz he's just so clean yeah they do always smell like bounce sheet because they use a lot of detergent I believe
00:27:08
good I feel like good ones you can't even get in the market fabos fabos those
00:27:13
are more long sleeves I don't really wear a lot of long sleeves because I don't live in the midwest anymore your attitude is [ __ ] insane are you
00:27:19
trying to do this because the intern's here yes yeah you have a crush on the intern you have no chance with her why are you showing off to the new intern
00:27:26
and wait can I bring the can I intern come come out for a [ __ ] what's your name again Delany hi Delany where you
00:27:32
from Delany Los Angeles oh you live here awesome let her step on a boot let her step on an Apple box and look at how
00:27:37
much taller she is than these two guys I know wow nice try Carlos nice try caros no don't hunch over stay on the Apple box Delaney Delany does mcon have a
00:27:43
chance with you ever what are you do what is that oh no I said wrong what is that we're not doing that oh Sor sorry that's not that okay what were you going
00:27:49
to ask H you oh yeah that's right sit down thank you wait Delaney get back up for a second
00:27:56
get back up yeah yeah yeah sorry get back up let's start again let's try it again yeah let's try it again you do it then yeah okay go
00:28:02
ah Mone who you just met right just today right first time yeah so here's
00:28:08
his thing whenever there's a woman in his presence uh he tries to show off you
00:28:15
know like he'll belittle us he thinks that's funny right get get out of the shot get out the shot get out of the
00:28:20
shot and he'll do this thing where he's like he's like tries to be Alpha and all that stuff let me ask you a question
00:28:26
okay you do you know are you familiar with the podcast yeah okay so um you know the power dynamics right do you
00:28:33
believe that Andrew and I are mone's bosses sure yeah yeah yeah and do you
00:28:39
think that we have the power position in this scenario yeah right should now listen to the way mcon talks to us MH
00:28:46
does that sound like a man who is not in the power position no really yeah
00:28:52
exactly interesting it sounds like a man who what thinks he is say it the boss
00:28:57
the boss the boss he thinks he's the boss yeah and I I want your opinion how do you feel about that
00:29:04
um I mean he has the confidence so that's good okay I don't know does it
00:29:11
make you does it make you like mcon or hate mcon when he does that kind of stuff probably lean towards hate yeah
00:29:18
yeah [ __ ] I mean yeah she and give her a full time we we'll get a job here okay yeah you're just an you're an intern
00:29:23
right now yeah fulltime amazing fulltime and I like that and and you know what honestly how tall are you 5'11 yeah 5'11
00:29:31
that's that can replace Mone because we need someone tall in the back exactly perfect yeah if you don't mind if this
00:29:36
is cool will you just stand right behind the box with the guys there for the rest so I don't have to look at him for a little while yeah yeah thank you much
00:29:43
that area yeah no that's great right right that's where F that's fine yeah that's where he usually is yeah he looks yeah yeah if you have anything to like
00:29:50
Dive In Like A comment if you want to throw one throw in your two cents you can lean in yeah like uh real just lean
00:29:56
in real quick don't have to get back on the just lean in uh just fast we do like a lot of fast stuff like this like uh
00:30:02
hot dogs or hamburgers go fast hamburgers uh uh uh pizza pizza oron
00:30:07
pizza or calzones Pizza why why no no no fast fast fast uh uh Israel Palestine
00:30:14
fast um yeah yeah okay do I have give her a job this is great yeah give her a
00:30:19
job way you pause I love it way to go Del anyway Delan thank you Delan I called her Panini when I first met her
00:30:26
that's what I thought her name was panini well it is it sounded only white people go there I think I'll do it fast
00:30:33
ask me what my name is I'm her what's your name that's what she said well that's what it sounded like to me it sounded
00:30:39
like and so what did you get out of that I donut I donut yeah I donut I got all
00:30:44
right well can I call you donut sure okay I'll call you Panini all right anyway wait a minute get back what who
00:30:51
wait F Who hat is this that's brand new it's so itchy in my head oh man what would you call your strip club if you
00:30:57
owned it if you own to strip club uh dax's strip club okay what dax's strip
00:31:03
club oh hey man what do you want to do tonight man oh I don't know man probably go over to daxas you can go to danx I
00:31:11
mean they don't have a cover that's great no they don't have a cover there's no girls there I know man so it's just a
00:31:16
bar man well but he just stands there and looks at you I know I kind of like him yeah yeah he doesn't sleep much he
00:31:22
hasn't slipped in days under his eyes yeah poor guy poor guy let's go to Da yeah we got to go we'll go see that guy
00:31:28
what would your strip club be called if you name if you had one uh coconut banana oh your two favorite flavors yeah
00:31:35
two coconuts one banana right oh men too two coconuts one
00:31:40
banana what do you think it's for bisexuals no oh not on one person I mean just the Coconuts would the tits and
00:31:47
anyway I try to do a plan that's what he just said no but he's saying that it's on one body it can be yeah you can why
00:31:54
why can't it be oh you took it there I know exact I thought there would be like a section with men and a section with
00:32:00
women and if you like both you can go to both ooh ooh ooh this is a great idea a strip club where dude I I just you just
00:32:06
blew my my wife kind of like a smoking section a nonsmoking section restaurants used to have you could have a dude side and a chick side so then you could bring
00:32:12
your wife or girlfriend bring your boyfriend or husband and go I'll see in a little bit split off do your thing
00:32:18
meet back up you know do you have anything that you're planning to do for the 4th of July do you do something to
00:32:24
celebrate my friends just did fireworks on their roof last year on the Roof oh my fun yeah uh yeah there
00:32:32
was one that went wrong and just like like didn't shoot up and just like exploded right by us wow could have lost
00:32:40
a ear yeah an ear yeah yeah e drum ear drum yeah you know there's a famous football player who lost a finger doing
00:32:47
that years ago whoa Jason Pierre Paul jpp Jason yeah Pier Paul I said it right
00:32:53
is it true that if you hold a piece stick of dynamite and you close your fist and you light at your handle disappear yeah look okay look he lost a
00:33:01
finger during during he set up a firework he lost fingers but did he grip
00:33:06
grip it I I think it went off in his hand earlier he was probably lit up on the fourth of July drunk as [ __ ] he
00:33:12
still played football afterwards still was great those are his fingers mhm look at that there's his myth oh my God
00:33:18
what's your favorite do you watch any sports what's your favorite sport um basketball what oh what uh who's your
00:33:23
team the Lakers yeah Los Angeles or Minneapolis uh Los Angeles okay great do
00:33:29
you know that they're uh do you know that they're from Minneapolis uh no cool
00:33:37
yeah soccer uh I don't know anything about it but my friend's like the Utah team yeah
00:33:44
that's the MLS and Messi I know about you know about Messi what do you know about him
00:33:51
that he's great what country is you from Argentina right wow that's very good say it right say it the right way though I
00:33:58
Argentina no you can say say say how you're supposed to say Argentina AR Argentina no come on Dax I know you
00:34:05
you're an actor dude come on argentin well let him get into it wait
00:34:11
can you do it so I know how no he does not know how to do it he knows how to do it up there look at the guy in the Hat
00:34:16
oh you do it Argentina there it is artina Argentina say it with confidence yeah
00:34:23
yeah Argentina so Messi's from where Argentina oh great very good very nice
00:34:29
and what what soccer club was he playing for for most of his career Argentina
00:34:37
no what Barona
00:34:42
Barcelona no you're doing an Italian guy I know that's I know you're going Barcelona
00:34:48
Barcelona anyway great so you you're pretty much bored all the time there's
00:34:53
not much to do like you don't you know me you don't do much I feel like he reads he entertains I don't think he reads even either do you read I don't
00:35:00
read anymore yeah yeah yeah I'm not bored but my life is probably boring to
00:35:05
to other people but I like it well everyone's life is boring to somebody else he's he his life would bore the
00:35:10
[ __ ] out of me dude I was so bored yesterday what' you do at night yeah I just kind of walked around like you know
00:35:17
playing side music cuz I got one of those Bluetooth speakers a new one pretty loud and I was listen and I
00:35:22
really I was like God I'm so miserable right now why I'm just alone you you
00:35:28
just kind of get you tap into like loneliness and I'm just kind of wandering around and I'm going God this
00:35:33
is I'm miserable you know what could you do to change that nothing I just have to let it pass my point is do you get that
00:35:38
way no I like to be alone but you never get depressed then uh sometimes but not
00:35:46
really have you ever been depressed maybe maybe in high school I didn't like
00:35:52
high school yeah High School kind of stuff that's the last time you were [ __ ] depressed pretty good pretty
00:35:57
healthy good relationship with himself I mean is it spirituality baby uh why do you keep
00:36:04
looking over there not going to help you oh Panini is over there he keep looking at Panini um you you pray what's going on
00:36:11
here bud uh maybe just I like to just go for walks and listen to music and same
00:36:18
uh and then if something sad happens I definitely feel depressed like what would have do you
00:36:25
have a dog or a cat or anything uh no no no animal but if I feel like you're like lizards or something uh they're fine
00:36:33
right like you got look at this you know what I mean chameleon I got from or spider I do like I do like lizards yeah
00:36:39
yeah yeah yeah if one if I had one and it died I would be depressed there we
00:36:45
go I mean that makes sense yeah I think that Mak that would Mak sense because perfect sense you loved
00:36:51
them true yeah yeah but you've never had one so how do you even know well I mean I know [ __ ] tastes bad but I've never
00:36:57
tasted it that is true but like you have a dog I love your dog what's her name
00:37:03
Cubby Cubby the Cubs the Cub is I've been on plans with the Cubs she likes
00:37:08
you yeah she feels comt like you dud she feels comfortable with you and here's why why she knows that you're an animal
00:37:15
guy she really doesn't like people that aren't animal guys or gals right you
00:37:21
know when someone lies to you and say they like dogs and then they come into your [ __ ] house and they fake pet your dog and you're like you don't have
00:37:26
to do that it's okay if you don't like dogs yeah and they go like this doggy good
00:37:33
doggy good yeah and you're like I know it's okay a month ago I had a girl at my house she goes g cats and I went
00:37:41
leave get out that quick get out it already it's like a red flag it's like
00:37:46
what are you talking about and another went made a snide comment like as she entered my you know that my downstar
00:37:52
area as she enters she go God smells like cats I go yeah it's a good smell there's cats here yeah it's a good smell
00:37:58
what you going to do about it and she goes nothing why are you so weird I go nothing either you know what I mean
00:38:05
don't say [ __ ] like that whatever you know what I mean like I I'm so defensive well yeah it's yours you love them yeah
00:38:11
so I know you how you are with your dog yeah like it's an extension of you it is
00:38:17
what you laughing this is one of the girls that runs of your car
00:38:25
quickly I can't hear understand the joke so I know it's I know it's going to make me mad but I'm
00:38:31
kind of glad I didn't hear it so slow it down what did he say Mone what did he say what did he say
00:38:37
mcon is it one of the girls that run from your car quickly oh is it one of
00:38:42
the girls that ran from your car quickly that you tried to kiss I get it oh he's
00:38:48
taking shots when are you going to Spain don't come back listen list I'll be honest honest let's you you want to do
00:38:55
real talk hit him hard no no hit let's do real talk hit him hard baby I want to do real talk real talk because I love
00:39:01
you man I want to do real talk all right it's been a pleasure dude work
00:39:07
right am I not right yeah I know I'm just this is how you do when you it's very when you fire somebody you P that
00:39:12
before mean yeah yeah yeah it's all it's been a pleasure you know and it's really what a memor is is what we built
00:39:19
together that we did right we did yeah but uh what I want to say is you're on your last leg that's it okay um I had to
00:39:27
tell her a couple of days ago like I can't hang out cuz I know I'm in the friend
00:39:33
zone and uh it really hurt me the FZ yeah and so um I know you I don't know
00:39:38
why you're crying so hard that you left yeah what is that what is wrong with you
00:39:44
dude he hasn't slept in days the baby's kep keeping him up he keep is that what you're justifying for him got to be I
00:39:50
mean what else is it but guy but guy dude um no it's not like that it's not okay okay Dax what's your favorite
00:39:56
midnight snack look you're up late Dax gets out of bed and goes I'm snacky what are you going to get maybe order
00:40:04
something from like an app okay what and what would you where would you go um
00:40:09
maybe just get some french fries or something just fries just fries yeah from where you think uh
00:40:16
uh Fred 62 cuz I live near it oh fr2 yeah may I say that I love Fred 6
00:40:22
yeah still open late uh yeah yeah 24/7 still 24/7 yeah great breakfast sandwich
00:40:27
at 3: in the morning if you want one phenomenal I'll tell you what I had the other night at 2: in the morning it's I
00:40:32
don't know it's not a I don't know what brand it is but it's they're like they look like fries they're chips but
00:40:38
they're fiery and on the cover of it there's a cheetah Cheetos that's not
00:40:43
Cheetos flaming hot Cheetos no no there's another cheetah Takis yeah it's that oh Chesters Chesters it's but the
00:40:50
same thing I know but anyway um I like how you go not Cheetos it's the same [ __ ] thing it's not it's a that's not
00:40:56
a Cheeto that's Chester Chesters are made by Cheetos are they really you think they [ __ ] have a mutual split
00:41:02
over a iconic figure I think they're two different Tigers no Chester is his name
00:41:08
Chester Cheetah is the fictional character by Fredo Le this episode is sponsored by acorns
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incentive to positively promote acorns investing involves risk acorns advertisers LLC and SEC registered
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investment Advertiser view important disclosures at acorns.com bad friends I ate a whole bag of those fiery fries
00:42:17
delicious at very delicious yeah but then the next morning I'm a little embarrassed you paid for it didn't you I
00:42:23
paid for it on this way this tooth right here right in the back of it was just the
00:42:31
mush of it caked into my tooth did you didn't brush I didn't brush I brushed
00:42:37
then I went to bed I'm like I'm hungry I know there's a bag in my drawer I ate it went back to sleep and in the morning I
00:42:44
had this gigantic mushed up you know what I mean caked onto my tooth right
00:42:49
and I had I had to I couldn't do with the toothbrush cuz it's gross to do with the toothbrush so I had I had to do one of these it was really bad then you had
00:42:55
breakfast yeah it came back out you put it right back in I think did eat it back in you gotta yeah yeah yeah do you brush
00:43:02
multiple times a day uh twice a day morning and night and that's it yeah you ever do a midday brush no little cleanup
00:43:07
no clean uh no no floss I should yeah it looks good it's fine dude you're like a
00:43:16
clean upstanding citizen I just realized thank you you brush your teeth right you
00:43:22
pay your bills all your and all your um um expenses are paid for right like you
00:43:29
not expenses like your car r did you buy it yes right it's paid for insurance yes
00:43:35
everything on time uh yes yeah do you pray no okay that's a little what's your
00:43:40
credit score what's your credit score I've never looked it up probably exceptional it's got to be so good I bet
00:43:46
you it's like yeah 800 and I think the last time you told me you don't masturbate that much I didn't say
00:43:56
that show a normal show me show me your hands yeah um what's a normal amount to
00:44:02
you what is it to you what is it to you is a good question that's yeah but he's
00:44:08
answering with another question okay I I I to me a normal amount would be every other
00:44:15
day unless you have a partner unless right yeah may be like that is that what
00:44:21
you do yeah no nope tell you why you don't believe
00:44:28
it no I don't yeah back up for a second with the thing don't lie to me pal okay
00:44:33
I asked you a question you could have said every other day but you didn't you're going to see because you don't know what the normal amount is cuz you
00:44:39
do it all the time feverishly yeah you do feverishly yeah aggressively and
00:44:47
that's not my that's you yeah right I don't have an opinion about that I don't no judgment
00:44:52
here it sounds like you're judging I'm not judging yeah yeah yeah I know it sounds like it and am but I'm
00:44:58
not all right so guy can I call you guy for a sec poah no no [ __ ] it I don't
00:45:04
like liar yeah yeah or Chachi can I call you Chachi sure all right LK L give me
00:45:12
the real amount come on baby uh may maybe less than every other day may
00:45:17
maybe a few times a week nice oh you do it the opposite way you thought it was
00:45:24
more wa yeah you [Music]
00:45:30
every full moon oh cuz I I hear the howling and I don't like it you have to how when you come do I have to it's
00:45:37
instinctual I know do it again that how I know you know it's not my fault
00:45:44
the full moon gets up there and I get I get Hornet yeah I know when I see the moon what whenever the mood strikes me
00:45:51
yeah I bark I don't how what noise do you make uh no noise
00:45:57
when you complete that's the creepiest one right sorry this is what you do this is what Dak
00:46:03
says I think it goes like this
00:46:09
completed completed wow that's really good is that close do you ever say
00:46:15
something to yourself when you're done do you go good Dex I know but I could try it let's try it tonight will you try
00:46:23
it maybe when you're done tonight I want you to go very good next do you like do
00:46:28
you like somebody right now I can tell you like somebody right now uh little crushy wash I do have a crush but she
00:46:34
doesn't live here how far uh New York it's but we only hung out a couple times
00:46:41
it's fine oh does it the this is romantic love in New York I love New York New York City New York City the Big
00:46:47
Apple the Big Apple you know why they call it that in hotels they used to leave an apple on your pillow when they
00:46:54
bed that's right and chocolates or probably not do you know that know why they would call the big chocolate that they used to leave an apple on your
00:47:01
pillow after you stayed at a hotel when they turned over the the hotels why did they do that all the Apple industry had
00:47:07
like a stronghold on the government and New York was kind of feeding red delicious yeah Upstate New York was kind
00:47:12
of they had an overflow you know how we use corn syrup and everything because corn overgrew same thing happened up the
00:47:18
northern uh New York Northern New York State Upstate and they just were like we have to get rid of a lot of these apples
00:47:23
so hey pal they forced the hand this is a lie but I know is it's a lie but it was so good it's a long lie it's a long
00:47:30
lie did you believe any of it um well just until you started explaining it yeah thanks yeah yeah yeah it's that's a
00:47:36
fun exercise you know I mean of like kind of just trying to be a have knowledge about a thing yeah like beef
00:47:42
jerky you and I do this on show every single day it's but with you I want to ask about this real love situation right
00:47:49
this CR I'm so interested and we're honestly we're not teasing you we want to help you we want to help you you're
00:47:54
our dog you're you're our guy okay so U without saying any names I I I
00:47:59
don't want you to make feel uncomfortable right um how did you meet her uh friend of a friend and then she
00:48:06
offered to help me with a editing thing a video that you did MH she offered mhm
00:48:12
that's important very important is she a fan you think uh no um uh but the friend
00:48:20
was that's okay so the friend loves your [ __ ] um I don't know how much they like
00:48:26
it yeah but that's okay but you know that you like it a little yeah yeah yeah well
00:48:32
that's like us we don't know what the degree is we don't ask what percentage do you like me you I mean that's insane
00:48:38
but my point is we all we know is he likes you and she probably if she offered to help you Ed it she finds you
00:48:43
cute yeah big time maybe yeah I don't know yeah yeah yeah was she tall short what are we talking
00:48:50
brown hair blonde hair shorter than me shorter than you shorter than you what color hair uh brown what color eyes
00:48:56
brown yeah what size feet I don't know okay you got to know okay that's an
00:49:01
extremely important DET is she more um and I I I don't even know how to say it is she more um is she really feminine or
00:49:09
is she uh you you know maybe the maybe more
00:49:15
feminine feminine okay okay soft soft yeah small petite does she know does she
00:49:22
know you have a crush uh maybe maybe cuz we got an email from
00:49:27
this girl emailed us what she say Alexi this let's can we google this girl I mean go to go go to her Instagram
00:49:33
Instagram yeah so this girl asked so let's see if we have another option for you bud okay all right wow she's
00:49:40
good-look Dax she's very pretty she said are you single she a hot
00:49:45
Latina how the [ __ ] does he get her I can't get her I I get TOA with her what are you talking about she's pretty
00:49:51
you're on a million dates with a million Prett go ahead yeah I'm sorry that was wrong of me no she really likes you dude
00:49:57
look how cute she is would this be something you'd be interested in dating this girl she reached out to us do you want us to connect you um she's she's
00:50:03
very pretty sure yeah is she her type just based on the profile um I I want to let you know she has no legs this is all
00:50:11
torso yeah she has no T she has no legs is that okay uh yeah mhm okay but is she
00:50:17
but just facially is that something that's down your line M okay good you want us to set up a date with her or no
00:50:24
um what would that date be well we'll pay for a dinner date movie an outing we'll ship you off to Catalina
00:50:31
Island if you'd like you tell us what you want to do with this what is your what is your date like your dream date
00:50:37
what is it you have a car right what did you say you have a Subaru what do you have Frost track huh Frost track Subaru
00:50:42
yeah yeah Subaru right you pick her up right beep beep right beep beep she comes out the British are coming yeah
00:50:50
yeah right do you open her door for her or no um yeah yeah you open the door are
00:50:57
well actually it's kind of hard to know what to do I I did go on a hinge date where I picked someone up and I didn't
00:51:05
know if I should like get out and open the door uh and then when she got in I like tried to give her like a side hug
00:51:12
kind of too soon too soon no no he's allowed to do that no it's too [ __ ] soon to no no no stop stop what the [ __ ]
00:51:19
you don't know her you open the door and you tried to do a side hug it did feel Carlos it's it's too much right if you
00:51:27
were standing up I get it P get Panini on the mic Panini get up Panini come here cuz Panini how old are you 21 okay
00:51:34
are you dating right now not like are you in a relationship no nice okay you're not in a relationship okay so if
00:51:40
you're on a date and a guy did this with Dax if he did give a little cute side is that are you mad about it you upset no
00:51:47
but I feel like you should have gotone out of the car maybe okay okay that would have been better cuz it did feel weird wait wait you weren't out of the
00:51:53
car no I wasn't out of the car you open oh you leaned over and opened it that way I can't remember if I opened it I
00:51:59
feel like he leaned across and opened it yeah you leaned whoa whoa whoa open it right there she came and you do you come on in side hog right be honest whenever
00:52:08
she sat there then I was like nice to meet oh my God that's not a move that I would do anyway that's your own I think
00:52:15
it's great all right anyway so how else does the day go so I'm the girl where are we
00:52:22
going would you like to grab some food yeah yeah okay let's get some food but
00:52:29
where where are we going oh um what what do you like well you didn't make reservations oh the [ __ ] yeah I made
00:52:36
some reservations okay where um at a
00:52:41
awesome Place sushi place oh I Love Sushi what's it called
00:52:46
um sugar fish oh I like sugar that's good what are you looking at me for I'm
00:52:52
doing it wrong I'm not [ __ ] here you guys are on a yeah you're judging no I'm the neighbor I'm just
00:52:57
looking at all right all right so okay Sugarfish we go to Sugarfish and then like we're
00:53:03
sitting down it's so um what do you like to order here um I like to just get
00:53:08
whatever whatever the chef recommends hey welcome to Sugar F let me take your
00:53:14
[ __ ] order e what's up man you want something to drink first to start you oh uh just water please oh yeah water ice
00:53:21
or no ice uh ice is fine oh you're out of luck we don't have any bro what about you you guys have any um high-end saki
00:53:29
uh all we have right now to drink is uh Sprite orchata uh wa wait water is this
00:53:36
Sugarfish what are we had Sugarfish no what is this this is Pink
00:53:41
Taco what the [ __ ] yeah why are we at a pink taco Dax what the [ __ ] you thought
00:53:46
this was a sugar fish yeah I got that was closer no man this all right well um
00:53:52
I guess I'll get a horchata yeah horchata for you all right for the lady for you you water right okay great be
00:53:58
right back yeah uh anyway wow I just it's weird that you would say we were going to Sugar F and now we're at Pink
00:54:03
Taco sorry hey there's your Tata there's your water yeah yeah that was fast yeah
00:54:10
they right behind me oh okay what would you like to order uh just a shrimp tacos
00:54:15
okay how many three you want them blacken uh sure yeah you have to say yes
00:54:20
yes um so I'm any modifications no thank you you like a as is yes
00:54:27
okay do you know everything that comes on it uh no ah [ __ ] you
00:54:32
then all right what about you I love this guy I'm I'm vegan so hurry up China
00:54:38
we got to go are you vegan yeah I'm vegan so do what are my vegan options uh you could
00:54:45
either [ __ ] off or uh okay yeah just [ __ ] off is all it says here yeah yeah I'll get three [ __ ]
00:54:51
offs okay three [ __ ] offs any modifications uh well does it come with guacamole yeah
00:54:57
yeah all right okay do you want a blackend yeah I want yeah I don't know what blacken [ __ ] off sounds like it's
00:55:03
[ __ ] off okay that's what that [ __ ]
00:55:10
is oh that's what a black that's what a black that's a black
00:55:15
and [ __ ] off that is so funny dude okay I'll be right back yeah that was very dude that was dude you're on fire today
00:55:20
dude we're just humming got you're humming to so good you took this girl finish the date so the date's over you left the resturant
00:55:28
okay all [ __ ] losing his mind anyway um get a grip on this guy so that pink
00:55:33
taco was okay I mean the [ __ ] I've had better [ __ ] offs you I mean and and I should have got him blackened I really I
00:55:40
barely ate it but what do we doing now um what are you in the mood for oh wow
00:55:47
um well we can go watch a movie I guess okay all right where what do have what
00:55:54
have you watched oh furios you want to go see furiosa have you seen it already I've seen it yeah I saw it too okay go
00:56:01
to the house what want to go to the house oh um maybe you know but there's probably some new streamers or something
00:56:07
that's come out you want to come to my house yeah really uh yeah okay come on we walk in
00:56:15
the door all right anyway I have like nine roommates okay all right this is my roommate um T you met you recognize him
00:56:21
from the restaurant P taco up good to see you I he was my roommate
00:56:28
that he's like you know what I mean what the black and um [ __ ] off anyway right
00:56:33
he knew I mean was a joke yeah yeah so Tito say hi to him yeah good to see you what's up hello yeah yeah yeah 15%
00:56:42
huh piece of [ __ ] how you treat people in the industry bro sorry yeah
00:56:49
cheap okay oh anyway okay pretty cheap yeah hey hey Tito yeah that's okay
00:56:55
though no Tito shut the [ __ ] up all right dud all right he he you know he has he hasn't been in a movie in like 15
00:57:00
years oh yeah yeah you're an actor bro uh I was and now I do more Tik toks oh
00:57:06
yeah I [ __ ] love Tik toks anyway Tito all right can we just cuz we're peace out later out yeah where's Raul and your
00:57:13
brothers R you want me to go get him yeah go get ra because I want to introduce
00:57:19
him go get R ra
00:57:27
Raul yeah yeah here he has a bike hey it's got that weird horn hey I'm Raul
00:57:33
yeah nice hey Raul yeah so anyway I just want to let you know Dax like I'm like I'm in I've I've always been in open
00:57:39
relationships I [ __ ] all these guys yeah we [ __ ] her all of us we run a train yeah yeah
00:57:45
yeah you want to be the Caboose yeah yeah no no thanks I mean we I mean you know the Train's taken off in about 45
00:57:51
minutes right if you look at the schedule we have a schedule yeah right on the wall wall look at the wall and it
00:57:57
flips like a European train station flip tell you the stops yeah yeah yeah so anyway um you could let him be the front
00:58:03
this time yeah you're always the front why don't you be the Caboose okay ra all right all right I let him all right
00:58:08
right A white guy yeah yeah but do you want to watch something first sure okay um what what do you want to watch um a
00:58:16
some kind of movie on you like sci-fi yeah you do mhm what what let's
00:58:23
watch something sci-fi okay oh I know Hobbit returned to the Netherlands is out okay you know they
00:58:31
leave the Middle Earth and they go to the [Laughter]
00:58:36
Netherlands you know what I mean and it's like you know the Adventure
00:58:42
Continues I haven't seen the the other Hobbits oh really yeah we should start with the first one the destination of
00:58:48
whatever smog all right so you want to watch it yes and you was the star of it the guy
00:58:53
from the office from the the English office oh yeah yeah yeah what's his name Freeman yeah Martin Freeman yeah
00:59:02
whatever should we watch it yeah yeah so what are we going to watch it on oh do
00:59:08
you have R I don't like the way this guy looks at me bro I know he has a creepy look right
00:59:15
if you want me to leave the TV room just say so yeah yeah uh that's fine you want
00:59:20
me to stay can you watch do you actually do you want to cuz you've seen all the H but you want to watch uh return to the
00:59:27
Netherlands I guess for the third time all right let's watch the Netherlands one all right and so we're just going to
00:59:32
sit on the couch and then oh okay the TV it works yeah of course okay so turn it
00:59:37
on R all right so
00:59:43
anyway I'm gonna take off I got to go frog Mo why' you put on the Phantom mice
00:59:50
that's my favorite movie I got to go in case you guys want to hook up
00:59:57
are you going to hook up with my girl yeah well no the Train's taking off are you going to hook up with my girl wait
01:00:02
the Train's taking off right go get Tito go get Tito get Sam get out get all the boys all the boys yeah yeah yeah you
01:00:08
ready you ready dude here's your conductor's hat ready all right well I'm the front
01:00:15
right yeah so I'm I'm bending over all right and we're going to
01:00:20
Fresno that's where you're born right choo choo very good what a
01:00:27
so you landed seemed like that worked that worked yeah what do you think Panini is that a kind of date that you'd
01:00:33
want to go on um is that something that that's not what it usually goes like maybe that's
01:00:39
hinge stuff then to each his own to each their own two each his own how many dating apps are you on uh Tinder and
01:00:45
hinge nice why not uh what's the other one the big what's the Big R Rya are you
01:00:51
on that I'm on r no no why not uh I applied once and they just didn't like no here's what we do no this what he can
01:00:57
recommend you right Carlos you're on it yeah I got him I'm on it makon are you on it yet he's he he hasn't gotten in
01:01:04
yeah because I denied his wait a minute you you you applied and didn't get in no I got a request from him and I denied it
01:01:11
I have like six applications dude that's so [ __ ] funny it's so I got in like what how long did it take me like
01:01:18
probably couple days couple days yeah days yeah even that no for you're famous
01:01:23
isn't that what that whole [ __ ] is about two days he's been at it for six months still not in oh over like over
01:01:28
like two years two years you guys they'll never let you in you're not going to get in I check it every couple month Panini are you on there no do you
01:01:37
do you do you like is would you want to be on those apps no no that okay that's not for you you like it naturally you're
01:01:43
meeting a guy on the beach so you're not on any of the apps no wow wow wow wow
01:01:50
that's for 21 am I crazy doesn't it yeah but she's you know she has her own style no I know but everyone's on the apps in
01:01:55
in your age range mone's 2 five now yeah mhm I mean I don't
01:02:01
really use the apps that much they're not so no one that young does so maybe it's like people in their 30s are use them more people holding on to it that
01:02:08
can't DET and in their 50s 30s and up I meant yeah yeah yeah but wait so the people in their 20s now
01:02:14
you guys is not no one's using them I mean everyone just kind of knows that it's all kind of like a lot of it just B
01:02:19
activity a lot of its algorithms designed against you it's it's not great so so their businesses dro
01:02:26
yeah Tinder saw its paid users Fall by nearly 10% last year that's [ __ ] huge wow huge wow wow this will continue to
01:02:34
fall you guys are finally going to do what we did which is go talk to people all the time and get rejected to your
01:02:40
[ __ ] face which is actually [ __ ] rad getting rejected is such a healthy
01:02:45
part of growing it really even it's so funny when I get rejected now I do often you know and I'm being real not true
01:02:52
it's [ __ ] no I do I mean I mean I have I had great dates I'm dated I'm dating somebody right now I really like
01:02:58
yeah and that's not a rejection she really likes me I like her and whatnot right yeah you've never been rejected I know but you mean that other girl that
01:03:04
you know when you were trying to tease me Cobra the Cobra right she did but then um the other day she basically said
01:03:10
it's the age it's the age yeah she goes you know I'm 27 or whatever and you're 52 and
01:03:17
when I'm this age you're going to be this age and and she's like I just I don't think I can do it we're all just looking for love I know and that's what
01:03:23
I told her too and you said I don't care how and she's just said still the age had the age and I go okay that's fine I completely understand and U good luck
01:03:30
she hasn't she's got to she doesn't have any uh uh you know she doesn't have
01:03:36
uh what is it foresight but I'm a I'm an old man dude
01:03:42
but the good news is you die she gets your [ __ ] prenup dude no no no oh okay
01:03:50
you're not going to get married if you live with someone in California for that's not that's not true yeah 100% it
01:03:55
is it's not it's not a thing it absolutely is look it up California what's it called common common law it's
01:04:00
there's no common law in California yeah because he would have gone through it I would have gone through it with kalala yeah no statue that confers the right to
01:04:06
marry couples there are statues that we a couple but they're in fact not but there's got to be something I feel like
01:04:12
I've heard horror stories yeah in other states yes not here yeah it doesn't you know why because everybody here is a
01:04:18
[ __ ] child nobody grows up that's it right we live in Peter Pan land yeah but
01:04:24
it's it here's but also so what I don't get is they look at like right now me
01:04:29
and this girl are having a great time we get along and this and that right but immediately she lives not in the moment
01:04:35
she lives 20 years down the line you know what if this happens you know what I mean so you'll die at the same time
01:04:42
then yeah that kind of makes sense yeah yeah yeah yeah exactly yeah that's perfect right but they don't think that
01:04:48
way so it's like you know you know I um I live in the moment I don't think about like oh if this happens this happens
01:04:54
that's way the the thing well cuz it's all going to go away when you least expect it well they say what in the next
01:05:00
two years we're don't to fix the um the environmental problem it's it's irreversible blah blah blah heard it
01:05:06
before show me a couple videos for fun that's me tell me this is that mean hungry tell me this isn't
01:05:14
you oh dude he's my friend dude yeah steal your jacket I love him dude that's
01:05:20
your jacket your backpack and your hat I was like that's Bobby Lee I know what's
01:05:26
that actor's name Benedict Benedict Cumberbatch W yeah that's what he looks
01:05:31
like Benedict Cumberbatch yeah he just texted me like in LA we're going to have dinner when he he's a great guy dude well make sure he doesn't wear that
01:05:37
jacket that'll be a bummer if you wearing the but when he did see me he did see me I was wearing all that stuff he saw me perform once and he goes oh
01:05:43
good look bro you think he's just copy I mean I'm not kidding when I say this that is 100% you but can I say this now
01:05:50
that I see it on another person you see how ridiculous you no no I see see how cool I am oh am I right Dax MH you know
01:06:01
who uh just from this this clip you never seen the movies that guy yeah he
01:06:07
was in Doctor Strange no I haven't seen that do the thing yeah yeah
01:06:13
see yeah now do you remember now you remember no yeah yeah I mean it's it
01:06:20
looked so much like you at [ __ ] I love it it was like alternate if I'm like similar to that good
01:06:26
you're give me another not similar you look exactly like that okay here's a new moovie you can do on girls since you keep getting cobr you do the lice o the
01:06:33
lice move what is it he's pretending to look for lice oh very smart look at that guy
01:06:41
that's smart who is that guy that's a guy that got a mail oer bride off the internet yeah yeah
01:06:46
yeah but that's smart he looks pretend to look for lice yeah yeah does it have
01:06:52
to be lice what is it what are you looking for in somebody's hair well I just saw the omen what's in the omen 666
01:06:59
on the skull whoa do you have to shave their head to see no you go are you the Antichrist and then you kind of look
01:07:05
right oh you give him a kiss that's just like this the Antichrist symbol is on the head right right so instead of Lies
01:07:11
there's other ways let's give me another one um is that a wig or no um you're
01:07:17
you're balding uh oh yeah let me see your hairline yeah that's 666 on the
01:07:23
yeah that right on the crown yeah I don't believe in any of that stuff but I don't want to be near you
01:07:29
don't believe that Damian do you believe in Daman who's that he's the devil's son
01:07:35
no I I don't know I don't believe in that person okay yeah it's not a person it's a [ __ ] he's saying he doesn't believe in you don't believe in demons
01:07:41
or Angels or any of that uh no so when you see Constantine you're like I don't
01:07:47
know who Constantine movie anyway um wait what you've you don't believe do you do you adamantly not believe in in
01:07:53
uh in Devils oh no I just like don't like ever see ghosts or think about it
01:07:59
but you believe but you believe they exist like like go hey man I'm living with a demon right now baby
01:08:05
uh I I I guess I would believe you if you're really like that's a bad example
01:08:11
um well if he doesn't believe it like this you've never had that kind of image in the middle of the night yeah no I
01:08:17
have had sleep paralysis uh where like I feel like I'm have like a shadowy thing
01:08:22
holding me down slend Slenderman uh no just a shadowy thing are are you sure it
01:08:28
could be SL man it could be who knows who it could be Mone get him come over here and get get this uh get him a water
01:08:35
what does he water just a water yeah or something yeah he has another water in his hand oh you do yeah oh he's got it
01:08:40
there he's got the oh cool get you another one thank you your legs are just putrid I'm sorry you're a great guy from
01:08:48
the waist up your legs kind of look like like your thighs because they're so hairless they kind of look like it's
01:08:54
Rosio Donald's leg it's like my aunt's leg it's like one of my aunts doesn't it look like one of your aunt's legs yeah
01:09:00
that's like my aunt's leg you know what would be work no hair on your legs you should tattoo look at how he look at how
01:09:06
he stands like how he stands yeah yeah yeah you saw that on Tik Tok all right get out of shot stand like that yeah
01:09:11
yeah yeah yeah get out of here get out of here you're freaking me out man yeah
01:09:18
he's such a weird guy gu you love him though I don't know yeah you do I do you're like a he's like your son he is
01:09:24
but I but if he can be replaced Panini seems chill she seems like she could be around yeah yeah right panine do you
01:09:29
want to come back yeah I'd love to all right panine all right I guess we'll bring her back do do you think Panini
01:09:35
should stick around on the show yeah do you want to come back on the show I would come back whenever you like so we
01:09:41
we our fans love you love you oh cool I mean I love we had really good numbers with you
01:09:47
cool what I think we we have a good camaraderie Rapport and Rapport y'all
01:09:53
are fun to talk to yeah you there's a bond yeah yeah will you do me a favor
01:09:58
the next time you come yeah have you ever shaved your face uh yes I usually just shave it like once a month I want
01:10:04
to see you shaved okay I'm so interested to see what your face looks like sh I've only seen you with a beard can you wear
01:10:09
something else yeah what do you want him to wear he just wears the same old like maybe Jazz it up a little bit I no he looks great like a full button up yeah
01:10:17
full button up maybe it would be funny to get for us to outfit you in like uh
01:10:23
like like uh fuboo or yeah fubo I going to say hip-hop clothing yeah or just
01:10:28
like maybe some Ed Hardy just try to bring it back you know back to 2002 yeah
01:10:34
yeah yeah okay we could do something like European jeans you know the with the little embroidery like zippers on the
01:10:39
side yeah yeah what about that uh it's not my style but I could give it a try yeah if you like once yeah yeah do you
01:10:46
want to say anything uh in the camera to the girl in New York real fast in case she watches this um
01:10:53
hi thank you for being a bad friend
01:11:07
W
01:11:12
wo wo

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This episode stands out for the following:

  • 60
    Funniest

Episode Highlights

  • 4th of July Barbecue
    A humorous moment where the hosts discuss their 4th of July barbecue and baby names.
    “I want to name a baby Bucky.”
    @ 00m 55s
    July 01, 2024
  • Voicemail from Mom
    A comedic voicemail reveals a shocking situation involving Dax's mom in prison.
    “Bob, I'm in prison!”
    @ 17m 55s
    July 01, 2024
  • Shopify's Global Impact
    Shopify powers 10% of all e-commerce in the US, supporting entrepreneurs worldwide.
    “Shopify is the global commerce platform that helps you sell at every stage of your business.”
    @ 24m 12s
    July 01, 2024
  • The Power of Communication
    A humorous discussion on how Paul Revere would have communicated in modern times.
    “Imagine if he just had Twitter!”
    @ 25m 44s
    July 01, 2024
  • The Importance of Pets
    A conversation about the bond between pets and their owners, highlighting emotional connections.
    “Cubby the dog feels comfortable with you because you're an animal guy.”
    @ 37m 08s
    July 01, 2024
  • Romantic Love in NYC
    The conversation takes a romantic turn as they discuss love in New York City.
    “This is romantic love in New York!”
    @ 46m 41s
    July 01, 2024
  • The Importance of Rejection
    They discuss how rejection is a healthy part of dating and personal growth.
    “Getting rejected is such a healthy part of growing.”
    @ 01h 02m 45s
    July 01, 2024
  • Living in the Moment
    A discussion about the importance of being present in relationships rather than worrying about the future.
    “I live in the moment; I don't think about the future.”
    @ 01h 04m 35s
    July 01, 2024
  • Aunt's Leg Comparison
    A light-hearted moment comparing legs to an aunt's, highlighting the humor in physical appearances.
    “It's like my aunt's leg!”
    @ 01h 08m 54s
    July 01, 2024
  • Panini's Return
    Discussion about bringing Panini back on the show, emphasizing the bond with fans.
    “Our fans love you!”
    @ 01h 09m 41s
    July 01, 2024
  • Fashion Makeover
    A playful suggestion to change up a friend's style with nostalgic clothing.
    “Maybe some Ed Hardy, just try to bring it back!”
    @ 01h 10m 28s
    July 01, 2024

Episode Quotes

Key Moments

  • Voicemail Chaos17:55
  • Shopify Growth24:25
  • Pet Love37:08
  • Midnight Snack Choices40:04
  • Snack Confessions42:17
  • Crush Confession46:28
  • Aunt's Leg1:08:54
  • Fashion Ideas1:10:17

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown

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