00:00:00
can you hear me i mean kind of but not really we can hear the fans more than anything else
00:00:06
but it looks good doesn't it look good jules yeah it looks good all right we can't
00:00:11
hear you i can't hear you now i can't hear you at all but you look good you two are bad friends who are
00:00:17
these two idiots why dude i'm an asian dude you two are disgusting well you two or something we're bad friends why are you in a bad mood jules
00:00:28
she's not in a bad mood she just um uh let her say it no let me why because she's gonna deny it oh yeah yeah i'm an attorney okay go oh sorry yeah yeah yeah i remember
00:00:38
i'm representing her oh you do okay yeah so my client here um hearsay this is hearsay right from
00:00:45
different sources right i heard that she had her very first panic attack today did you really yeah
00:00:52
yeah she didn't know what it was welcome i know welcome i've had so many of them thousands
00:00:59
seriously i'm having one right now will you explain will you seriously explain your experience um
00:01:05
i was doing homework yeah yeah and then my hands started to feel numb yeah yeah what is it what else happened yeah my hands felt shaky and numb and then i started to
00:01:24
breathe heavily like i couldn't breathe oh like like you were yeah yeah did it feel
00:01:29
like your heart was skipping a beat or no was your heart pounding heavy like you could feel it out of your chest right correct another symptom
00:01:35
these are all diarrhea do you know what you were thinking about at the time when it happened yeah what was it secret
00:01:44
oh and now we're gonna have to get that out of you yeah what's the secret what's
00:01:49
the secret welcome welcome back to what's that secret old saying you're as sick as your
00:01:54
secrets that's exactly right right so what's your secrets make you sick secret secrets hurt someone
00:01:59
what is it secret secrets are no fun secret secret secret hurt someone dum-dum to you if you have if you have
00:02:05
it if you haven't every secret has a unique weight to it and you can only carry them for so long
00:02:12
what is your secret it's a secret okay it's a secret and what is it not for long this is where you make it up
00:02:19
okay if you don't want to if you don't want us to know this we've been doing this show for 51 weeks yeah make it up
00:02:26
okay yeah yeah my laptop broke oh i'm having withdrawal withdrawals from what you're yeah having with having withdrawals from what it's smaller yeah yeah that's sad what's
00:02:40
the real secret though yeah that's it that's it yeah that's such a what a bad also by the way to make you feel comfortable i'm genuine i have i had panic attacks yeah for years and i had them in college
00:02:55
i've told the story before but this isn't fun i was working at a restaurant and i was serving and i was tired and
00:03:00
dehydrated and i hadn't just hadn't eaten all day and i felt really like hazy and woozy and i didn't feel one i was like oh man
00:03:06
i just haven't eaten that's why yeah but i also had worked myself like i was working crazy hours i wasn't sleeping
00:03:12
and i get these things called ocular migraines do you know what that is i go blind in one eye like i like my
00:03:19
vision goes away so i started to get an ocular migraine and i had all those symptoms i never had had a panic attack before
00:03:25
and i had such a bad [ __ ] panic attack i went outside behind the restaurant and i laid down on the rocks yep like i was gonna die
00:03:31
yeah another time what he did was he um here it is what no no go ahead remember you went to
00:03:37
the bathroom you stood up you went and you hit your head again it wasn't a panic attack what was that it was it was alcohol lack of sleep and lack of food okay and whatever that is he does that too
00:03:49
and vertigo yeah yeah that was silly sometimes i hit my face on a sink counter [Laughter] am i the only one that's ever hit their head on a sink counter i did this movie called heartbreakers
00:04:00
and it was a really bad movie and great director and um and i remember and um sticky fingers is
00:04:07
that a wrapper yeah sticky fingers fingers was in it yeah i was using the scene he's the chess player
00:04:12
right the chess player right did i tell you the story about how i had a monologue no i mean i know you
00:04:18
guys played chess together we did play chess so i had a monologue with them right yeah and i go the camera set up right yeah
00:04:25
it's a it's a it's a single from my waist up sure and they go and also i remember them they're running
00:04:31
out of time like like they have to wrap that we gotta go we gotta go right and i have
00:04:36
this one page thing two words that again do it the hemisphere or whatever the line is the hemisphere the hemisphere i stop
00:04:48
and i have a [ __ ] panic attack full on full-on like i can't talk trembling sweating
00:04:53
right cut cut cut right and you know people come you know right because you know we got
00:04:59
to go you're all right because let's [ __ ] go we got to go we got to go which only like puts [ __ ]
00:05:05
fuel on the fire of course right then it's way worse yeah so now i'm trembling like imagine if someone walked in the room when you're having a panic attack
00:05:10
and i was like what's wrong and you're like yeah yeah and i remember um they just moved on because you can't get the scene couldn't get it out oh bob yeah yeah it had but it looks
00:05:22
that's why when that's why when you call the casting director when i fail sometimes you didn't have a panic attack okay you didn't have anything and you
00:05:28
called me out in that way another thing you call me how was that you've been doing lately which i don't like let me just get this
00:05:34
out of the way i love you so much okay i love you too is you look at this weird crazy spider
00:05:39
on my microphone yeah george you deserve it look at that here's another thing that you've been doing
00:05:44
oh he's repelling this week yeah that's been driving me cray cray what is it you call me it
00:05:52
i want to save his life though i'll put him in a bag see see what happens my therapist told
00:05:58
me this is going to happen i have a resentment i'll save you for later i have a resentment
00:06:04
you mean i have i'm no it's fine i'm brave enough i'm brave enough to bring it up and then there's a spider so a lot's been
00:06:15
going on in the news and in the social cycle and you know what did i do i called you this week to talk to you about a few different things no you've been calling me this is the first
00:06:27
this is what you've been doing did you get it [Laughter] right i did no twice he did it but you still don't know i do know you don't i do
00:06:40
because you got it no you got it i didn't you got it no it didn't you didn't get
00:06:46
it no they gave it to i don't know uh they don't tell you that on the phone you can ask your agent yeah but i didn't
00:06:52
even ask they go you didn't get it i don't know if i got it or not you got it no i got a call
00:06:58
saying they love me they love you right and they like my audition told you right
00:07:04
see and they're what are you doing on your videos not even listening that's what she's been doing lately who are you here are you out here no
00:07:11
because i'm reading my school's emails oh oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] you [ __ ] little [ __ ]
00:07:19
idiot [ __ ] liar it's true yeah read it out loud what does it say it is true because in the
00:07:24
car right over she was reading emails she goes like this 16th february 22. she kept saying that 16th february 22.
00:07:32
i go what are you [ __ ] saying right now what is it she said i have to go back to school 16th or february 22 february 22nd you
00:07:40
need to go back yeah is that what the email's about yeah yeah so now you know the information can you let it go and be in the present
00:07:47
moment and do the [ __ ] podcast okay you're skating on thin icebergs oh man it's the thinnest ice irritating the [ __ ] out of me right you know what we should make you tell the secret that's
00:07:58
what we should make you do because of what you're up to but let me say something to you andrew i was hoping right
00:08:04
that i wasn't gonna get it just i can give you [ __ ] about no but that's the best part cause you're gonna get it and then i can give you [ __ ] about it
00:08:10
but here's the deal here's the stipulation what if you get it yeah i have to fly over there with you you're going to go to hungary
00:08:17
it's in budapest yeah is that where hungary is is hungary in budapest yeah okay yeah that's congress per capita hungary is the city
00:08:29
yeah budapest is the state i know that the country no budapest is the state oh and it's within turkey
00:08:34
turkey's the citizens yeah the citizenship the citizenship right and lithuania and greeks are dirty
00:08:41
shellfish eating people they are yeah they're dirty dirty hairy people pieces of shits i know that [ __ ]
00:08:48
hunger is a [ __ ] country all right so don't be dumb dumb okay budapest you'll fly over there with me i
00:08:53
want to so bad i know but when i go to hawaii you never show up first of all first of all i asked you
00:08:59
yeah hey wouldn't it be cool if i came to hawaii and we did like a little bad friends in hawaii you know what you texted back what no
00:09:05
exactly so what the [ __ ] are you saying i don't i want you to fight for it oh you want i want you to fight for hawaii
00:09:11
dude you don't want this love to be that easy yeah i want you to go come on man you know what i should just show up yeah
00:09:16
i mean given this dude when i was in hawaii i had eight days off and you did nothing
00:09:22
well i did stuff but kyla wasn't there you were there alone yeah i would wake up and i go why doesn't she
00:09:27
go with you because we have so many what are you doing nothing why do you yeah you were i'm checking the time the time that we're at now yeah we just started
00:09:39
i mean i just wanted to check it again i just i just checked the time wow oh wow you know what if you don't want to be here yeah yeah if you don't how about this if you don't want to be here too bad
00:09:49
because you have to you have to be here yeah you have to otherwise you're you're done for it yeah
00:09:54
you're gone here we haven't even thought about here's what we haven't even thought about yeah she's getting accepted to colleges now
00:10:02
oh no i know so when do you go to college september so much yeah so now what college i don't
00:10:09
know yet but you got accepted to one what'd you get accepted to rude uh devry university of phoenix online cal state northridge no fullerton
00:10:24
okay that's that close close it's in southern california that's anaheim that's like fullerton's not far she could still drive to come to the podcast
00:10:31
she has to if you go to fulton yeah you have to what's the other one we don't know yet how many did you apply to eight
00:10:39
eight of them eight schools which what's your dream school long beach yeah yeah long beach is a
00:10:44
great school shout out snoop dogg wait the long beach long beach state yeah yeah you know the home of the
00:10:51
what's their mascot you're not going to get in home of the what if their administration's watching this right now
00:10:56
yeah we're really interested in this ruby girl rudy jewels the time to improvise blue whales home of the blue whales
00:11:02
[Laughter] exactly long beach state uh uh california state long beach csulb home of the dirt bags that's their baseball team home with the dirt bags that's real yeah
00:11:14
that is real that is actually real yeah and they have a big pyramid where their basketball team plays look there's one right look there it is right there george is pulling up so you
00:11:20
can see it what's their new s the new mascot's called the lb the lb is the as a shark click on the
00:11:27
images i'd like to see what the lb looks like e-l-b-e-e the lb wow okay okay what did it used to be something racist they had to get rid of it what's that guy next to it [Laughter]
00:11:40
prospector peter jay leno knows that that is literally janet leno yeah yeah yeah just take it for go trying to take for some goat so this guy got banned prospector pete
00:11:52
probably because it was embedded in some sort of racial narrative that they were like we got to get rid of it mm-hmm can i say something else that's
00:11:58
so funny why that's something i also have to admit yeah please and um it's very difficult to admit it admit it
00:12:04
i will so um how do i begin when you suggest things you know when i suggest what things to watch or listen to tv and film yeah yeah i do i've done a
00:12:17
great job you how many you how many people commented and said in and of itself so i'm going to talk about that life-changing okay
00:12:23
and that boy i've got a list of new [ __ ] to watch because we've been watching okay can i just tell you about my story
00:12:28
get it out okay so you you you brought up in and of itself yes and i you know i go when you said it
00:12:35
i thought to myself i'm never going to watch it i will not want i will not i refuse right yeah
00:12:44
so i'm at home right and i'm just i'm hulu right i skim right i'm skimming skimming
00:12:50
you know they have the little things we suggest this yeah you know you might like this yeah and i i run past it yeah [ __ ] it
00:12:58
just out of spite yeah i just buy it dick so i go you know what dude i think i should watch it because i know
00:13:03
i'm not gonna like it i know that whatever he says i know that whatever he says about it right is absolutely wrong
00:13:10
right and so i'm just going to watch it out of spite right so that i can come back to the podcast
00:13:16
and go [ __ ] you i wait you you owe me two hours of my life or whatever it might be okay right you waste significantly more
00:13:23
than two hours of your own life on dumb [ __ ] so go ahead okay i don't like the way you're [ __ ] holding that [ __ ] glass by the way
00:13:28
it's the biggest cup we've got okay so i'm watching it five minutes in five minutes in my eyes are going i told you i'm not being i'm not kidding
00:13:41
you i told you i had to push pause because you're both oh god oh god i was so good right and i hated myself for it by the end of the movie yeah you were moved weren't you not
00:13:53
moved snot bubbles i'm not kidding you i'm trembling right yeah oh my god that was life-changing right and i could call it you have to
00:14:05
watch this yeah you guys well you facetimed me yeah and collide was in the background and she i why didn't you watch it with her in the
00:14:10
first place because she doesn't she's worse than when it comes to you yeah she's worse
00:14:15
why because we just don't trust you [Laughter] you think we don't trust you you don't [ __ ] you don't trust my we don't you don't trust me i think i'm
00:14:30
beginning to a little bit you should all right you should now i'm beginning did you just you didn't see it yet no
00:14:35
no no it's amazing yeah it is amazing so what i'm saying is is that and other people i've read on twitter
00:14:41
that you suggested it have watched it and they go thank you they love it i'm telling you right now now you get a second person
00:14:48
to validate okay okay i'm saying that it's i'll tell you why i like it and i'll tell you why it's genius i'm not gonna give anything away no don't i'm not
00:15:00
but he's taking two performance arts mediums correct combining them combining them
00:15:06
yeah right and it's very authentic and original but it's also very life-affirming
00:15:12
and it's just well done yes yeah and it's like it's just it you can tell you know they say people say this a lot about
00:15:19
um you're not good at whatever your art is until you hit your ten thousand hour mark you know whether it's music or fashion
00:15:25
or comedy or writing or perform and you can tell that this is uh he said ten thousand dollars oh yeah you know what i mean like you can tell when someone it's almost like when you watch a good
00:15:36
comedy special or listen to a great album when you go these guys have really put in some [ __ ] work
00:15:42
yeah it's just like it comes together it's like card tricks for instance sure right i
00:15:47
would never be able to do it never because i just know that i'll be doing it right fan right and i'll be doing it i'll and
00:15:54
i'll already in my head go i [ __ ] up already i mean i don't know where the ace is
00:15:59
right i lost it it was supposed to be here on this finger yeah i was supposed to be controlling it yeah and i lost the control it's in some
00:16:05
guy's pocket you put the ace in me already yeah yeah no it's just you just can't do
00:16:10
magic you can tell that he you okay you know who else i i got into this weekend oh here we go
00:16:15
i got into on hbo max there's a show called um painting with john do you know that show
00:16:20
no john laurie look up john lewis it's a series so he had an original one called do you
00:16:27
know who this is no man john lure you don't know what it says i don't know don't worry it's crazy
00:16:32
mr uh mr look at there he is it's funny to think that you mr snob artistic snob rat brat don't know
00:16:39
who he is because he is a god in the artistic community okay can i one of anthony bourne's
00:16:44
best friends ordains his name one of anthony bourdain's best friend i know who he was can i say
00:16:52
something to you your attitude right now so he was a newbie he's a musician a painter i know this right oh you know who he is
00:16:58
yeah you don't know who he is yes i do he's my a sponsor [Laughter] see that's how you improvise yeah that
00:17:04
just makes you up okay this guy's got a show about painting and i'm gonna say something about art though okay yeah i don't know much about it
00:17:10
correct and i've never claimed on the show that i was an art connoisseur no but you think you're a high brow
00:17:16
artist i'm not and i don't like the way you're doing that with your fingers you like you like you don't like eyebrows you like highbrow
00:17:21
i don't do this no you want to be a part of a high brow community yeah yeah yeah but you're not you're
00:17:27
beanie you know what i know you know you know where you know what i am what lowbrow yeah you're very low yeah i'm very low
00:17:32
bro and we might be throwing gang signs yeah these might be gangsters but i'm going to tell you right now dude
00:17:37
i've never claimed that i don't know any okay how about this let's do a contest it's not that you don't claim it name me 20 artists
00:17:43
just off the history of the world go ahead 20 15. we're going to sit here while i
00:17:50
go through them yeah yeah i want to know artists of any kind yes really yeah mediums you know what i mean but i can
00:17:56
pick music i can pick no no no in terms of just um painting either if it be you know abstract or picasso there we go rembrandt here we go
00:18:09
renoir deng go ahead uh uh jackson pollock bingo uh i can use him john laurie there we go uh um
00:18:21
it is weird to name uh yeah that's why i like doing that it's very hard i mean i don't know anything about painting but yeah
00:18:27
let's name some more painters uh um uh donaldo no there's no donald trump yeah there is tell me if there's a donald though i'll let it slide don't know go ahead i'll give you donald though
00:18:39
donald donald um uh warhol very good i guess yeah uh basquiat but very good but whatever i love bosque out i know you do you see exactly this is what i mean love it
00:18:52
take it take a time out we're on eight okay you would love dali yeah salvador dali you would love
00:18:58
basquiat you know why why because people have this affinity for that guy even though what he made was only
00:19:06
revolutionary because he was like a black artist in new york when it was all white hoity-toity outside of that
00:19:11
his stuff wasn't that good basquiat's stuff wasn't that good none of it was like
00:19:17
wow oh my god all basquiat stuff was fine it was like yeah that's fine art i guess it's good it's good but it wasn't
00:19:24
mind-blowing it wasn't it was just unique because he was a young black artist in an all-white world
00:19:29
which is credible but this isn't that good that's very good this isn't that good
00:19:34
very good that's fine so you rudy can do that i'm gonna say this all right rudy can do that
00:19:39
you're the type look look look you're very good not so good yeah or can i just say this bring up a renoir
00:19:45
bring up a runway all right renoir but stop it that's my point but can i see this let me see what i want to say okay let
00:19:51
me see what look at that look at that scissors oh realism look at that fat look at that fight
00:19:56
fat white girl by the water han can make a [ __ ] realistic planning painting like oh yeah that's my uncle you know what
00:20:02
you're you know how technical that is yeah and basquiat was like oh really so you're like all right so you
00:20:08
right you think that basket blah blah right yeah what about this guy whatever your guy right here right
00:20:13
putting the [ __ ] brush in the paint can and just doing this jackson pollock go [ __ ] yourself i don't
00:20:18
know my art has been commended as being strongly vaginal i just named him okay what's a good asian artist then
00:20:33
people i know who david cho you name one that's that's the only one get off a show no i'm not gonna he's a personal
00:20:39
friend of mine give me another one give me another one give me another asian artist that you love um
00:20:44
i can't better help oh boy um during this pandemic nothing has helped me more than better help therapy has saved my life um i go through trauma therapy through
00:20:56
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00:21:02
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00:21:08
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00:21:15
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00:21:20
we both use therapy we've talked about on the show a lot it's a big proponent of our lives and i think it helps everybody for everything that
00:21:27
you're going through all right better help they're committed to facilitating great therapeutic matches they make it easy for you to change counselors if need be
00:21:33
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00:21:40
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00:22:02
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00:22:17
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00:22:29
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helix sleep dot com slash bad friends look at how look at david show phenomenal yeah yeah okay so for my
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money yeah i'll pay for that over basket okay this is my point was great look at how talented that is
00:24:30
put that side by side with a basket george look at how beautiful that looks and now
00:24:35
show me show me whatever [ __ ] candle they're selling at urban outfitters with a basket [ __ ] label written on it
00:24:41
that's what they do now they sell this stuff oh show me no go back go back go back go
00:24:47
go to boxer that's one of his most famous yeah yeah yeah look at this click on boxer make it big
00:24:52
images usually help there it is all right right there look at this can i say something about my niece
00:25:05
when you have a realism don't ever do that again this is my mind oh that's right okay so what i'm saying is that let's
00:25:11
calm down for a second okay yeah why did we get so hot because you're not mad about the artist thing i know because um you know a lot of
00:25:17
artists can do realism all right i knew dudes in art class in high school that could draw my face
00:25:24
okay really technical yeah tough face to draw to face to draw okay it's unique it's
00:25:30
not it's round but i just do slits it's round but it has you just do a circle two slits a mouth
00:25:36
and two holes it's like a smiley face yeah all right it's very easy to do you have a smiley face
00:25:52
is that no one could do what bosque did because that's an original that comes from his mind so what do you
00:26:00
mean david chopin's nothing original no he does but i'm just saying if there's more realism it's it's
00:26:05
abstract there's you could right these are you can look it up david chopin although he's a friend of mine he's very talented right and compared to other
00:26:12
people's right but with basquiat when you see a basquiat you know that it's him yeah it's yes because it's uniquely bad
00:26:18
because it looks like a child no no it looks like a child's painting children do it all the time do that all
00:26:25
the time all the time no they can't you know what i'm gonna show you every fridge and every fridge in sherman oaks every
00:26:30
parent's like look at it brayden did yeah braden does that yeah that looks like finger paint for braden
00:26:36
and uh what's your you can't compare also i know these are two different kinds of art i understand you can't
00:26:41
compare right like a movie like elf great film great film and a movie like mean streets
00:26:49
yes you can no you can't elf [Laughter] right and apocalypse now elf is better it's not [ __ ] better
00:27:05
elf is better is that better it's not better you know it's not better you know it's not better you're just saying that give me something else that you think will beat out because i'm telling you right now elf is still
00:27:16
winning for okay memorable lines uh uh the characters i'll give you another one i'll give you one okay elf okay
00:27:23
versus um the original star wars oh that's tough two different movies that's very tough okay how about elf or the original alien
00:27:34
two different movies you can't compare the two i'm gonna go with of course elf yeah you know what i'm saying you can't compare art right it's hard it's hard my point is when i see basket stuff i know it's his
00:27:49
stuff compare the yeah compare the rotten tomatoes between compare the red right between between elf what do they
00:27:57
get well 84 do you go by tomato score or audience score not audience you don't do because half
00:28:04
of those guys are [ __ ] trump supporters what do you mean margery taylor green what's the tomato score then who are
00:28:09
they what people that know what film no no these are film people are they are they the ones that are buying all the box office tickets no that's the people matter yeah but the critics don't matter no no
00:28:21
no now we're going into a [ __ ] person and here's why i let me say something here's what happened at the golden globes all these names were released and
00:28:27
everybody was like this what what is this no one watched anything yeah because that's why you have the golden globes
00:28:32
and you have the people's choice awards no people trust me no one watches the people choice awards that's not a real
00:28:37
thing you don't have a [ __ ] you don't have a [ __ ] people's choice awards a party my come on over let's
00:28:42
watch golden globes should be about the people the emmys should be about the the the the uh academy listen okay
00:28:55
when you by the way you and i are never going to any of these things we're never going to get invited you
00:29:01
know what i am no you're not i am you'll go to the razzies no i will go to the emmys one day you'll go to the lucy's or the aziz what were you working interviewed
00:29:12
[Laughter] twice you were interviewing people yeah i think senator william h mason
00:29:18
can i ask you a question there you go okay and the second thing is you're not gonna go to the emmys yes i am you're not you'll go with somebody's guest i'm
00:29:24
gonna take you as my guest no no and i can't wait holy [ __ ] [ __ ] it no no stop stop if dave let me finish if dave gets
00:29:30
nominated i'm taking it as my guess i can't wait i'm not going to take my wife and get invited to the [ __ ] emmy he's not going to go in your face you're not
00:29:36
going to go yes i am you're not going to go oh you're saying i'll get invited but when i won't go oh no i'm saying you won't go you won't get invited i will
00:29:41
get invited for what what are the show that i just sold to abc no i'm not going to win anything
00:29:49
it's so negative i love it but i'm going to say this okay yeah is that that got 84 percent right
00:29:54
what did alien get what's alien george 95 no oh that's mean streets obviously obviously i mean streets is a come on but you said earlier alien got
00:30:06
what what an alien 98 90 higher than means trees right so my point that means alien is better than mean
00:30:12
streets right your point is right you're right and it's also better than elf in this world yes but but my point is
00:30:18
you can ride the tomatoes you can't compare the two we just did i know but that's one thing maybe some other site
00:30:24
would have some other opinion my point is is that they're two different [ __ ] artists subjective right but someone's
00:30:30
got to judge at some point right so and also kind of make this argument too is is that there have been bands where people
00:30:36
you go oh why would anyone buy a creed album that's what millions of people do it's a great band
00:30:41
oh my god great band great music you're [ __ ] you you're really doing it you're a chad right now nothing against creed nothing against
00:30:53
that what i'm saying is that you know you can compare you know it's just like it's not
00:30:59
great i would never buy it and it's like i think people in hordes like stuff that aren't good
00:31:05
you can because you can't trust people you can only compare it on a technical level right you can't go creed
00:31:12
is not as good of a band that term not as good of a band as um any of them stop it because they are better than some of them okay creed is not as good of a band as the
00:31:26
black keys right you could say that yes and then someone would go well i don't like the black keys i love creed
00:31:31
but you can say crazy that person creed is a [ __ ] heart okay you can say creed isn't as musically um technically talented as a black and
00:31:41
that's a more validation you look at an a creed album right and then you look at okay computer
00:31:48
sure right outside right side by side yeah it's not even a [ __ ] okay computer blows it out of the water all right it's a masterpiece i don't i'm saying i just i got
00:31:59
i agree from beginning to end it's a [ __ ] masterpiece i agree but there's people out there that don't yeah and those people are the ones that
00:32:06
[ __ ] make review and tomato i don't trust them that's my point yeah but some of those people are also the tomatoes listen i i know this and this is maybe
00:32:19
why some people call me an elitist that's what it is an elitist you're driving crazy today but okay so i might be a little bit of an elitist right but there are certain things that are
00:32:32
good that's why when i even when you say i'm not going to that fine okay that might be true
00:32:37
all right i'm kidding you can go if you want i don't what do i no no no let me tell you something not only is your show your show is going
00:32:43
to get an emmy a golden globe and it's going to be the first television show that gets an oscar
00:32:49
your show all right you know you're being a [ __ ] [ __ ] and you'll get a grant that's impossible you're going to get an ego all right
00:32:54
so what i'm saying though is oh god my throat is my throat i can't even swallow what we're saying is you know what neither of us know what we're talking about we do i mean let me just close out my [ __ ]
00:33:07
close enough close out my [ __ ] uh argument close it up papa is i do know there are just certain
00:33:14
things right in terms of art right that are more creative um more relevant more um you know putting their finger on what's
00:33:27
going on on the planet for the world right culture culture and there's some albums are just
00:33:34
put out right quickly yeah right through some sort of like corporate machine yeah right and it's
00:33:41
only there so that people the masses what is that the them that's the masses right they'll go buy it right right and those and i'm i'm not
00:33:54
necessarily you know going to listen to them when it comes to film okay okay who do you listen to because you have it's like it's like those patriots they say america america is the greatest
00:34:07
country in the world when a lot of them have never even visited other countries how do they know right
00:34:12
well you don't need to go anywhere when you're in the best i you're not going to leave a morton steakhouse and go to an
00:34:23
that's a good one all right my point though right being is is that a lot of these people go this movie is
00:34:28
the greatest move in the whole world when they haven't seen being there or paris texas or you don't mean any of
00:34:34
these you know what i mean but maybe it's the best to them and that's still okay no but some of them say it's
00:34:41
the best of all time this movie is the best oh have you seen you know i mean any kurosawa film or
00:34:47
have you seen but there is no best of all time it doesn't exist there are there is no best there's there's there are 50 films
00:34:54
right that most people that critique films right and have seen all the films will
00:35:00
say that generally we we're pretty confident that these 50 right are in the best films of all
00:35:07
time yeah but we don't know what's coming next i know what i'm saying is is that i'll tell you that citizen kane will probably always be on that list it'll be on a
00:35:14
list because of some of the best films but it won't be for it won't be forever times will change my friend yo i'm sure in the [ __ ] in the [ __ ] uh parliamentary days
00:35:27
that they thought uh finger flicking they were like this is the illest [ __ ] of all and it still is it's not it's not really yeah that's not
00:35:38
that you don't put it on anymore you don't i use the chopin all the [ __ ] times i don't like pants because
00:35:43
i do when's the last time he's played chopin inside the house i don't know who's exactly she doesn't
00:35:49
know she doesn't know let me name me six composers right now this is tough six composers wait i forgot everything already because
00:36:05
it's pressure you can't name one we just named one um okay we'll give you clues we'll give you a question we'll give you a pleasure okay how about this all right there we go one of them one of them was they did a
00:36:19
movie about a dog a big hairy dog big hairy dog but that's the composer's name and the guy and john
00:36:25
what was the actor's name he used to yell his name the the dog's name all the time yeah yeah he used to go
00:36:30
it starts with a b yeah b bae it starts with bae bae i don't know how to pronounce it say it try it try it
00:36:43
[Music] beethoven wow that's good that was very difficult okay what's another one
00:36:50
right there's another guy right his first name right was the guy that makes pizzas right there's a famous guy that makes fancy pizzas in beverly hills that's
00:37:02
right has the same name as a composer i don't know okay his middle name is his middle name his middle name is amadeus
00:37:15
i don't know she doesn't know wolfgang amadeus mozart mozart wolf game amadeus puck there's a
00:37:22
great restaurant where you go in there and you jam out to class you've never heard of them i heard of him mozart you know
00:37:28
about beethoven right bach kind of yeah yeah kind of bach yeah yeah i've learned in therapy today okay i forgot what day it is therapy day it's therapy
00:37:43
day so um i went to therapy this morning too i like to affirm my paranoia okay like yeah all right so um what i did was friday night you know
00:37:56
i'm on a show magnum yeah yeah and one of the older episodes aired and some guy in twitter goes bobby lee literally is the worst actor
00:38:08
right and who is and who is this guy well then today he made fun of my penis so i know that he has something against
00:38:14
me i'm sorry guys it was it was andres oh my god andres it was you i'd laugh so hard and
00:38:19
you're fired but what i do then is this so i i read the tweet right why because you're scrolling and then you kind of i know right so this is what i said this
00:38:30
is what my third therapist got so mad at me today so this is what i do i go i read the tweet and i go oh [ __ ]
00:38:37
maybe he's right no i know it's crazy it's insane so what i do is this i produce a i i text a producer
00:38:45
oh cause you want where i go so was it bad which is like not good man and i do that when i take takes like if i don't think that the cake is good you ask no but i'll hang out by video village
00:39:00
no i really will i'll let like if you're the director i'll just stand around like this they're resetting a difference you want
00:39:06
to do a watch playback is that why no no i'll just kind of go do you get it and my therapist goes you can no longer do that ever you can't that's so bad for you i know i don't do it in a desperate
00:39:18
needy way no it's not desperate i do it in a very i just kind of like i'll whistle do
00:39:24
you know you know i'll play with my feet a little bit right i and if they lock eyes they'll go you get it
00:39:31
yeah we got it we're moving on come on why are you so insecure about it once you know once it's locked it's over
00:39:36
i understand that i don't know but it's just like i'm just things that i'm learning in therapy that's all and your therapist said no longer you're
00:39:43
going to do it i can no longer do that but is there a way that you can check yourself to make sure you don't do it again i have to self-soothe
00:39:48
you do i have to self-suit and the way i go i don't even know what that means so what she said was um because i've had i don't
00:39:54
know why but i'm um for some reason like i'll just give you an example i can't tell you who but
00:40:01
like this always used to happen to me like i'd be on stage this is like in 15 years ago like i'd be at the improv
00:40:08
yeah i'd be on stage and a female comic would walk in right with a black eye i'm not kidding you
00:40:15
with a black guy can i know who you know i can't tell you who damn it and she'd be like look at me
00:40:20
she would look at me i was that guy that you hit her no but she would have to talk to me i was
00:40:27
like i was like the female comics tampon right right yeah where where like female combos would go you know what i mean yeah this guy was really aggressive with
00:40:38
me what do i do you know i mean i was that guy did you do anything about the gut no no but i you know i'm just you know
00:40:43
so i i'm good at soothing other people yeah what i'm saying so how i deal with other people right
00:40:50
i'm to do it to myself right that's how i'm going to self-suit that's good yeah yeah so stop spending
00:40:55
time trying to soothe for others you self-soothe yeah self-self soothes i'm trying to self-soothe myself
00:41:03
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meal kit true and what do you have to do with rudy that's dude you can't sue you don't no no soothing she um has a
00:44:20
thing with me is that um and it it'll it it may never work out our relationship may never work out i have to say that and that's real but
00:44:32
she's going to college not working out six months and i'll tell you why right is she
00:44:38
doesn't she has a thing where she doesn't come to me with any problems she ha she well
00:44:44
that's why she's having panic attacks she goes to kalila obviously or she's burying it no she goes to kalila with
00:44:50
all her problems and i hear her problems via kalila right yeah she just you know this happened she
00:44:56
would never say it to me why i'll come in the kitchen and she'll just this is what she does i'll walk in
00:45:01
the kitchen and let's say she's standing right here as soon as i walk she'll just go around the counter
00:45:06
to avoid you to avoid me yeah but also to be fair to her you can be very volatile at times
00:45:12
am i ever volatile and be real sometimes like in what way and this is good and i think we should do this right now no i think this is the moment it's not negative it's not negative so what is the thing that i do that's volatile
00:45:25
i just let it out go ahead like you explain where i go like far away when you come in in the
00:45:32
kitchen it's because you always want to punch me you want to punch her oh god she's so silly you
00:45:39
[ __ ] know you [ __ ] rat time out was the story with the girl with the black eye was that rudy
00:45:47
wait a minute what does he where does he punch you let her talk where does he punch you where yeah like on the arm or in the
00:45:52
stomach or on the what does he do arm he hits you on the arm hard sometimes hard sometimes hard come over
00:46:00
here come punch me how he hits you come here with your mouth or your mouth i want to feel it wear your mask i want to feel how hard
00:46:05
it gets you and be real okay i'll be i'll i'll be okay i'll be you and you be bob okay ready yeah okay oh hi tito bobby
00:46:19
hi oh good morning okay honestly yeah that was hard i have never hit her that hard i i just saw the weight of it but can i tell you something you don't know your
00:46:34
strength okay so maybe you are hitting her harder than you think and she's a little you know she's a tiny little girl i do it as a
00:46:39
joke yeah i do it as a joke oh you hit women as a joke no playful in a playful way oh oh it's funny [Laughter]
00:46:52
so here's what here's the deal now that i hear it now right i hear it now i hear it now right yeah
00:46:59
i won't do that again okay so is that the reason why you you don't come to me with your
00:47:04
feelings and your and what you're going through no what is it you don't trust me
00:47:11
i no i trust you i just go to the kalila okay but let's say this what do you think it would take from bobo for you to say i want to tell you something personal
00:47:23
that's bothering me what would it take i don't know you don't know because the communication seems open he seems like he's really well willing to do something if no like even
00:47:36
when we get into the car today right i go we'll go coming here yeah and i go um hey
00:47:43
i open with that yeah hey you you creepy aunt yeah did i not do that yeah hey i didn't do anything i just looked at her and go hmm i did one of those things because you
00:47:55
could tell she was upset yeah i make one of those noises too like [Music] you you you're doing okay
00:48:03
right yeah she was not fine not fine yeah she's not fine you're not [ __ ] she can't really get
00:48:09
that no i see to bobby as like the fun and like always positive um uncle that's nice here's another thing yeah and i'm tired of you calling kalila your sister
00:48:25
right who she's your aunt right and you call me uncle yeah right so maybe that has maybe it's
00:48:32
because you put me in a role you're right yeah you put me in a some weird like adult
00:48:37
role because you're old okay okay okay well bro bro she's 19 you're 49 you are very much the grown-up in this situation like okay
00:48:51
she's an adult a young adult and you are a what's the word you used um tito no no
00:48:57
no what you said he is what he's old old enough you're an old adult i'm old okay
00:49:03
okay so let me feel like gross old yeah i'm not and i'm not offended by the word old right
00:49:08
but you're old i know okay you stop whatever you're doing whatever you're doing right now i'm not doing anything yeah you're getting me all riled up time out let's take a break let's see
00:49:21
yeah it was this girl that used to she would comic and her comedian boyfriend used to punch her oh my really that was crazy i gotta know the name and i'll tell you later but um
00:49:33
it would be i would be like in north hollywood at a bar show mm-hmm it should show up with
00:49:39
scratches on her face oh my god how'd you know it's performing here you know what i mean
00:49:46
and this guy is still around he's killing it he's doing well yeah but back in the day it was like the old
00:49:52
west and comics acted you know a fool they acted crazy back then sure yeah i mean but also acting crazy hitting somebody is a little it's way too much that's different yeah that's not being like a drone coupe
00:50:05
you know who who who throws them at the bar at the improv and pulls their dick out which that happened at the improv i saw
00:50:11
that yeah that's different than hitting a woman in the face i mean come on right and and speaking of hitting
00:50:17
women so are you no longer going to hit rudy that's a thing i i i thought it was a joke but don't you think i know and i bet you
00:50:23
it was loving but don't you think now she gets to hit you a few times isn't that only fair she can hear me all that she wants no
00:50:30
why i'm not violent you love knives yeah you're you're a secret violent crazy person you just are pretending that you're this sweet
00:50:41
everyone loves online rudy's personality your other uncle what not your uncle but your great uncle
00:50:47
chopped his brother in half of the machete oh yeah oh yeah your grandfather your grandfather she took a machete yeah not kidding you went to her his brother's her other
00:51:04
grandfather right she took a machete right and in the torso just this part right oh sliced him in
00:51:11
complete half right imagine the blood right right and he just he went to prison got out you can get out you can keep that that's
00:51:22
what's great about the philippines philippines you cut someone in half by the way you go to prison for life for weed yeah yeah here
00:51:28
you cut someone in half and they're like and so one time you'd be out in 15 years and i knew this about him so when i met
00:51:34
him that guy for the first time yeah oh my god i nearly sucked this chick i was just like i went i gave him a hug he's like whispering i go whatever you need man i sort of got
00:51:46
whatever you need man he killed his brother yeah and why why what was it why money money you know it's always
00:51:53
money isn't it dude he cut up his brother in half because how much money do you know um
00:52:01
i think his brother i don't know sold the house to get money and then he got angry so
00:52:08
he's like that japanese kid went to school in france right in this japanese kid this
00:52:14
really happened recently no like 20 years ago i went to school in france and um you could look it up but um he
00:52:21
was um in boarding school whatever and his parents were wealthy and he just decides one day i don't know what came over him you know we have bad days you know he decides to eat somebody and
00:52:32
um you know he just kind of had that mind like i want to eat that lady you know so he eats another student wow yeah yeah
00:52:40
whole like head to toe i don't know what he i i've never eaten a human so i don't know what the good parts are
00:52:47
i know what the good parts are yeah and then what happened was ah sagawa was that him yeah it's gotta be
00:52:53
known as the karat known as the what yeah the kobe the kobe cannibal that's a cool
00:53:01
name yeah it's really good and then his parents were so rich they got him out of france
00:53:07
oh so he was never extradited back different he went back to no he he was in france when it happened he got to japan no and they never took
00:53:13
him back no he was able to come out of france and then he just was never charged right
00:53:18
now he's just walking around that's what i'm saying they never extradited him to the best story at parties look at this guy and he's 71. and he's still alive
00:53:25
a long time ago then he's 71 he's still doing it 50 years he got arrested but released two years after pre-trial detention
00:53:31
wow bad bad and then he was gone yeah so like in some parts of the world you know you can eat somebody
00:53:37
and it's all good it's good well it depends how many people are starving a misdemeanor yeah it's like a parking
00:53:42
ticket yeah yeah you got a cannibal ticket yeah uh speaking of france so uh i just read this morning
00:53:49
the police this is happening all over the world the police just broke up an 81 person orgy 81 people
00:53:57
from all over the world they flew in from nine countries and they got fined this is the funniest part they got fined
00:54:03
they could find because of covet laws yeah guess how much guess how much they each got fined every person 81
00:54:08
135 dollars that's it that's a lot that's nothing for a north these people flew for an orgy yeah they flew across the world to [ __ ] somebody 835
00:54:19
is nothing i'll pay that fine i want to go to the orgy how come i don't get invited to these orgies have you been in an orgy
00:54:26
no no no on my own being real no i'm serious i've never been in orgy i've never been to one i've never seen one i
00:54:32
want to see him i want to go a free orgy you've never been in a free order and i instigated it
00:54:38
i don't want to get into it but i wasn't the one that let's do it today how many people is in orgy mine was six what makes an orgy more
00:54:45
than four i don't know what it is i don't know what the rules can you google what makes an origin it makes an orgy but mine was six an orgy is a wild party
00:54:51
especially one involving excessive drinking and unrestrained sexual activity that's all
00:54:56
stupid i'm having orgies all the time yeah yeah yeah yeah wait there's gotta be that's an oxford
00:55:01
that's oxford dictionary said that an orgy has to be a number right yeah because like greek orgies
00:55:07
there were there were like 50 to 100 people think of how fun that would be yeah what a party and by the way are you
00:55:14
afraid to pull my dick on everyone laughing no one's paying attention you don't think so no you know how embarrassing
00:55:19
would that be though you show up you're like hey guys and then everyone just does an applause break the record stops
00:55:28
i would probably put it back on and leave do you know why you know why orgies were invented why do you know why seriously so guys in
00:55:35
the hubbub of it all yeah when all this like everyone's [ __ ] and sucking and moaning so a guy that wanted to [ __ ] guys yeah
00:55:41
could sneak it in and be like oh i didn't i didn't know i wasn't really 100 yeah it's so guys could
00:55:46
right in a guy's butt and be like oh i just thought you were a girl but at this point it's like why am i so friendly okay let me ask you
00:55:52
this if you were an orgy right and you're [ __ ] girls closing my eyes i'm doing it right yeah yeah yeah you're right and then all of a sudden
00:55:57
you know like all of a sudden like um before he died dustin diamond's there oh all right please jesus christ soon literally just said well i just suppose dustin diamond was
00:56:08
there i rest in peace screech you're great you're a great dude and you know he's having sex i don't know if he was a great dude i
00:56:13
take that back he's having sex with yeah and you look at his ass cheeks and you know the perfect asses you've ever asked
00:56:19
you've ever seen his ass is so nice so nice yeah would you just yeah you would right no would you stick
00:56:26
your dick digging nah you know what for me boys butts are too hairy no but it doesn't even it's like it's
00:56:32
like a brazilian woman's butt oh then yeah yeah yeah it has the tan lines and everything oh it's got that baby
00:56:38
and it sticks out then yeah his whole body is white but his ass for some reason is super perfectly tan
00:56:45
yeah what is that seven is probably a really mild semi orgy oh so i have world that really wasn't in one you haven't had one you had to have seven you need seven but but also so the six that you had
00:56:57
yeah how do you how do you what do you say do you switch out condoms do you i don't know because i it'd be weird to like use a condom let's say you're doing guys and girls
00:57:09
you're [ __ ] some guy in the ass right yeah you pull it out there's some [ __ ] and you see a vagina do you stick
00:57:14
it back you go go in there or do you yeah i guess i don't know but i would another i imagine that most of these unbridled orgies don't have condoms oh yeah yeah
00:57:24
that's weird you know don't you think yeah there's no way yeah otherwise otherwise those should be sponsored by trojan they should put some
00:57:30
money into the orgy game yeah yeah but i just think how do you first of all all this means to me when i read it what i really wanted to talk
00:57:36
about was yeah how do you get invited to that kind of like 81 people right i'm not don't laugh at me i want to know
00:57:43
how you get invite that's a privilege your six people are people that you knew correct
00:57:48
no i i i did i tell you about the asian orgy that i almost got involved in famous
00:57:55
agent or asian orgy sometimes after sets at the comedy store right i go to the [ __ ] um
00:58:00
carnies carnies i know i've been with you it's embarrassing right and i get the chocolate i know why do you get that
00:58:06
so delicious i love bananas and chocolate you love a chocolate banana so it's frozen and i'm
00:58:12
like a little kid yeah sucking on a black dick walking down sunset and then yeah and i
00:58:17
love when like fans will come out of the showroom and they'll walk to their cars whatever they'll get good job and i'll
00:58:22
always do like a dick sucking i think that's so fun right and they always get to laugh yeah of course like a great job i'll go oh
00:58:28
like then it gets a huge laugh right so this time it was like maybe 1 1 30 in the morning and i'm walking
00:58:34
back and this is when i was dating sarah a girl inside i remember her okay so yeah uh yeah never mind i'm not gonna say her name all right so i was
00:58:40
um in the hyatt there right there was probably 200 asians all dressed in white a white party right yeah and i and then this is when like um mad tv i was on mad
00:58:54
tv so i was on a show and and asians especially because i was the only really guy you're the only asian guy on tv so they
00:59:01
all knew who i was right yeah think oh my god it's bobby lee right and they go you want to come up i go
00:59:08
what's going up there and i have the chocolate you know i'm sucking right getting trying to get laughs right and they're like let's we're a sex um
00:59:15
club you immediately you're like this is fake yeah i go no i what it is what is it yeah we rented out the whole floor and you're invited i'm usually at the club it's a club but you can come up
00:59:29
and i go i don't know what it was so i go all right i'll go i'm gonna go well you'd go right all right well i'm gone
00:59:35
i'm there in my mind right so you know how hotel rooms the doors each door is there's a door
00:59:41
that's locked to the other door those are all open so you can walk through pass-throughs
00:59:47
pass through all these right these rooms wow right right right yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah so and there's music right and you know
00:59:55
at first nothing was happening people are just talking right is there anybody i'm at the tail end of my chocolate thing you know my
01:00:01
face is all chocolated up right my taillight and then all of a sudden like dudes are just taking their clothes off i think they were just making out are these people hot oh my god people are
01:00:13
hot or not so everybody's hot yeah i'm the only i'm the ugliest guy there obviously all right yeah yeah i wouldn't
01:00:18
if i didn't have mad tv i would never be invited you're right okay plus you didn't have white on so
01:00:23
those guys you know me and kissing girls and i was kind of walking around like i i think i gotta get out of here
01:00:29
were you talking to anybody no no just by yourself so i go to this room and i go this seems like a nice room there's candles right
01:00:35
and there's no guys it's all women oh no right yeah so there's these two girls on the bed
01:00:41
and i'm sitting there on like just a hotel chair right my feet are all chocolatey
01:00:46
i'm trying to think to myself should i um have a stick around on the balcony this is weird right
01:00:51
yeah but no i'll watch and they're hooking up oh yeah they're eating each other right that's great nice cover your ears
01:00:59
okay yeah i go but i should go because i was living with sarah at the time you're allowed to watch i know exactly i'm watching so right i was gonna you know what i'm gonna nut in my pants
01:01:11
because i was with the nut in my pants yeah right yeah just explode without even touching it's amazing that's when your dick is going like that
01:01:19
it's begging to get out right and then i see the girls look at me yeah right and they go they start
01:01:24
whispering meanwhile when they're whispering my penis is going like juice is coming out right right yeah and also i'm like all my like
01:01:36
spidey senses are like like you're you're you're in a territory yeah where you don't want to be here correct right yeah but i can't move can't move right you
01:01:48
didn't go no my body's like leave but i'm not leaving no you can't yeah i know you can't yeah all right so
01:01:54
they get up from the bed right walk through you and they walk toward me right and one girl starts kissing my neck and i go like this i go no with my hand like this why
01:02:07
i go no like this and i run out wow yeah the control the control dude a hot naked chick comes out i regret that moment every single day i should have done it
01:02:21
but i should have [ __ ] done it and i regret it i'm not with her wait when you were in the elevator did
01:02:27
was it not run into your head to be like [ __ ] this [ __ ] i'm gonna go i gotta go back up i gotta go i know because the one thing that i can say about myself
01:02:34
is i've never cheated on anybody and you were committed you were like i'm not gonna do it with two random girls in this hotel i wanted to and i wish
01:02:41
i did yeah you did yeah but i didn't in your mind you did i didn't because it just goes again you
01:02:48
wanted to i wanted it so bad but it goes against everything that i believe but but also yeah you don't know those girls what
01:02:55
would you do done in that situation there's no way i would have been genuinely yeah i would have never
01:03:01
if a guy was like come upstairs having a sex party yeah i know to be like that is trouble i'm no way i'm going up
01:03:08
there right i shouldn't have gone up there yeah because i knew you know because by the way yeah if you go up there
01:03:13
at that point you should [ __ ] yeah you went up you already did it go do it yeah you did
01:03:19
it yeah yeah yeah what is this what is this guy oh yeah oh my god the religious guy okay this guy's great so what is he look at
01:03:25
this though by the way cause god we talked about save we talked about saving you on this show a lot no we've talked about saving
01:03:31
people people being saved by religion oh yeah remember my buddy who was saved you know yeah look at this this guy's out here
01:03:36
saving people and i want to give him a lot of credit this guy's great don't watch porn pray with me instead my friend
01:03:42
started this new hashtag prayer watch porn and i guarantee that you maybe have been feeling a little bit tempted yeah
01:03:47
or maybe you were about to watch something okay how much does this guy love porn too much the fact that he's got to say
01:03:53
it out loud it's too much and that means he's put away yeah no he needs to go to like a six-month like
01:03:59
lockdown these guys deserve to be in prison for this yeah this is prison this the fact that he's got to say you as you
01:04:05
should pray to not watch porn yeah means his addiction was so violent yeah that it was like you know
01:04:11
what i saw and i'll never forget dude my first time in new york so my first time i ever was in new york and i was going to visit
01:04:17
my buddy in brooklyn and i was like i'm going to take the train you know what i mean like i'll do the new york thing i'm not going to take a cab
01:04:22
i'm taking the [ __ ] trip the moment i get on the l train a guy is on his phone watching porn dick
01:04:28
in hand yeah i was like should have taken a [ __ ] cab that's this guy by the way yeah that's this guy he's watching it in
01:04:35
public you see have you ever watched seen someone watch it in public watch porn in public no never i feel like i see people doing i catch people
01:04:41
all the time watching porn in public no really yeah maybe it's my group of friends no it's just that it's just i
01:04:46
don't really um well i haven't been out in so long i know but i don't walk by and people are watching i always think they're watching
01:04:51
the avengers or something or you know some cool things i saw a guy at the comedy store watching porn in the o.r
01:04:57
yeah drunk as [ __ ] in the back of the room watching porn on his phone yeah and honestly i didn't blame him well i saw i you know there used to be i
01:05:03
didn't blame him at all um a series of porn i think was i forgot what company was but they rented
01:05:08
paulie's house to do porn porn which one the one above the store the old one the old one way on the hill
01:05:14
you're right and every time i would watch them i'd go oh yeah i've been you know since i'm like i've been there
01:05:21
isn't that kind of nice yeah yeah that's kind of nice to be like i've been to that point yeah especially when
01:05:28
wait did he get did he get paid good money for that i don't but you know how he just rents that stuff that i know would you ever rent your house off for
01:05:34
porn no look at me porn company comes and goes bob if if fans of you okay if i wasn't in assa akira is producing it i've um no because i have [ __ ] jewels
01:05:45
in the house i have dogs you kick her out you're not there while they're doing it oh yeah um it depends on
01:05:51
where i am financially they come to you and they go look we're gonna rent the house out and we'll give you we'll give
01:05:56
you 15 grand no i don't need it we'll give you 25 grand no we'll give you 50 grand
01:06:03
no we'll give you a hundred grand okay how fast can you be out yeah no how many how much do you need it for
01:06:09
one day yeah go ahead 100 grand but we're gonna get come on everything there's already come on everything
01:06:20
well you know that's a you know a thing and i got a text from a friend yeah the other day that goes i couldn't be
01:06:26
more annoyed with you right now why i go context and he goes you're stupid [ __ ] show is filming on
01:06:33
my street all week so like you know they because they you know they put up a notice that says i'm filming on your
01:06:38
yeah in your neighborhood and and i was like oh dude sorry yeah that's got to be a bummer
01:06:43
because they blocked the streets you know it's a whole thing and he's like this guy's house that we're filming in he rents it out all the
01:06:49
time for people that don't know people in los angeles they rent out their houses for film shoots all the time and they give you like i don't know 10
01:06:56
to 20 grand depending on how long they use the house but they wreck the house we rack the house i mean
01:07:02
yeah you wreck it and every time i always think would i i would never rent my house out to a hollywood
01:07:07
production never never because you [ __ ] it up you [ __ ] it off you leave [ __ ] everywhere things get banged and knocked and broken
01:07:13
everything gets broken i always look through the drawers yeah because sometimes the green room is in
01:07:19
some kid's room it's a kid's room right and you're in there it's like you can tell that like pictures up and yeah somebody kid lives
01:07:26
there somebody lives and i go through things this one one time we were at what were we shooting and we were in someone's house and they had and they had tape on the doors that said do not enter
01:07:37
guess what what i entered yeah yeah how am i not gonna check it out i got to know what's in there
01:07:42
when i was shooting magnum and um we were shooting on the street and this [ __ ] guy with a maga hat
01:07:49
right mm-hmm comes in he interrupts us i hear action he interrupts the scene and he goes you guys are taking jobs away from hawaiians
01:08:00
and he walks away and the boom operator it's just this gigantic brown guy you're made with tattoos
01:08:06
but he's everyone's hawaiian he's holding and just i'm a whim bro yeah we'll be right back [Laughter]
01:08:17
do you have any games today rudy has a project that she wants to pitch to you guys rudy's
01:08:22
got a project she's got a she's got a school presentation she wants to practice i have a school presentation oh great this
01:08:29
is exciting oh yeah she seems amped about it do you see her face yeah i can tell that
01:08:35
you're down before we do this can i talk to you yeah yeah yeah get get into her heart man are you sad
01:08:41
no can i can i be real with you for a second if you ever need to talk to someone
01:08:47
about are you on your phone i'm gonna do the oh the presentation okay if you ever need to talk to someone
01:08:52
about panic attacks or anxiety you know you can you can always text me she i'm being serious
01:08:59
maybe she will text you you'll text me she will never i swear to god she'll never text
01:09:05
me i suffer from anxiety and depression very much and i gotta tell you if you ever need if you ever want advice if you ever if
01:09:10
kalila and i died for some reason right and she was homeless yeah right and she needed a sandwich
01:09:16
you'd probably be the last person she'd go to last yeah cause there's [Laughter] wow yeah and let that seep into your
01:09:27
[ __ ] heart that's i mean all the stuff i've done for you is pretty remarkable it's crazy i know i've done so much nice
01:09:33
stuff for you yeah why don't we see your [ __ ] presentation [Laughter] little [ __ ] okay all right what is it oh i like this oh the grateful dead the grateful rudy oh let's see rude
01:09:46
let's hear it hello everyone hello i'm rudy yeah and i'm gonna be presenting the grateful dead wonderful oh sorry no you don't clap
01:09:59
oh my bad so there as you can see there are a lot of um names but the first the first ever that um the first people that formed the grateful
01:10:11
dead were jerry garcia bob wire and bill krutzman and then the other few were when those four or no those three
01:10:26
left and then they replaced them right on and then other the other names of the band are
01:10:32
the other ones we have to the dead i like it legion of mary dead and company and rat dog rat dog
01:10:39
baby no dog baby and then the fans names are called um the fans name is called deadhead deadheads
01:10:47
deadheads yeah and then those are the genres of the grateful dead rocks psychedelic rock
01:10:54
blues rock and etc yes and you're missing one of the members who's the newest guitar member who's the
01:11:01
newest guitar player he's not up there um john mayer john mayer yeah he's not up there why is he not up there i forgot you forgot you saw john mirror playing for the good dead
01:11:12
yeah i didn't know that you serious yeah yeah he's yeah okay do you know he's i won't get
01:11:18
into it it's like probably one of the best modern guitars of ours i'm still presenting can i say this though genuinely
01:11:23
i know i know you are but can i just say that let me interject one of the best guitars of our time he's great no no one of the
01:11:28
best guitars of ours i want to see something even more controversial though oh boy here we go okay i think that adam lambert is better than
01:11:35
freddie mercury next slide that that picture of them was the first um show that they did oh cool and then they began as the warlocks and formed
01:11:47
early 1965 in palo alto ca palo alto california in extremely wealthy area of northern california where stanford university is and then the name grateful dead was
01:11:59
chosen from a dictionary and it meant the soul of a dead person or his angel showing gratitude to
01:12:04
someone who arranged their burial burial but yes don't correct her well it is burial
01:12:10
in the philippines it's called boreal burial yeah i went to his funeral and burial yeah next slide please fun fact
01:12:22
say no to drugs okay in 1970 the ban was going to perform at the warehouse in new orleans yes and at the night of january 31 police
01:12:36
raided their hotel and arrested 19 people with possession of various drugs no that's disappointing i never thought
01:12:42
that band was into that kind of stuff that's disgusting okay during their europe 72
01:12:49
tour pig pens health one of the members deteriorated to the point where he could
01:12:54
no longer tour with the band he died on march 8 1973. that is his picture that is his picture
01:13:01
he's known for his he is known for his long beard thank you thank you what is this picture
01:13:07
can you imagine it was a picture of somebody else yeah that that is a friend of his yeah
01:13:12
i'm gonna be telling this slide i'm gonna be telling you of the deaths of the members oh my gosh
01:13:22
this is amazing give us the desk baby on february 1975 keith and donna jean god just just drive forward they were both like a couple no [ __ ]
01:13:37
two random people with the same [ __ ] up last time i'm just telling you because you did you might not know yeah like when keith and donna met
01:13:44
they're like you're a gotcha too they left the ban but then keith died in 1980 because of a car accident oh no that's right um midland the keyboardist of grateful dead for 11
01:13:58
years died due to narcotics overdose in 1998. then shortly jerry garcia the main singer garcia's health started to decline and
01:14:10
then garcia was in a diabetic coma for several days in july 1986 later died on august 9 1995. wait he was
01:14:18
in a coma for nine years several days no days a few days wait he garcia was in a diabetic coma for several days in july of 86. okay i thought he stayed
01:14:32
in a coma for nine years and he played the whole time he died in 1995. next side piece my high school girlfriend's brother had his hand you know he only had four
01:14:43
fingers on one of his hands yeah and he had you know his hand print on a poster in in his room and it always intimidated me
01:14:50
because his hand was so big and her brother hated me go ahead the grateful dead performed the last concert on july 9 1995 at soldier field in chicago and that
01:15:02
year was when joey garcia died mm-hmm uh joey joey jerry it doesn't matter jerry
01:15:08
garcia died whoa all right relax it's the way she yells okay and their legacy their grateful dead form during the era when bands such as the
01:15:19
beatles the beach boys and the rolling stones were dominating the airwaves that's right they were part of the process of
01:15:25
establishing what psychedelic music was they were the pioneering godfathers of jam band world
01:15:31
and they sold more than 35 million albums worldwide that's impressive impressive and you can
01:15:37
buy their merchandise are we we're plugging their merch on the show no i'm just saying
01:15:43
okay is that what else that is all thank you for listening wait you gotta talk you have to have some kind of ending cause you just doing
01:15:50
thank you for listening go ahead i mean she has a big thing plan go ahead read the thing i mean and
01:15:56
say it what you were gonna say that is all thank you for listening goodbye that was the big thing you for listening goodbye bigger thing
01:16:07
than that that's your thing you were banking on thank you for listening goodbye that was it how about this let's let's add one
01:16:14
more piece right now just to end it i want you to give us kind of a summation of
01:16:19
what the group is and means to you and why they're important to music go ahead yeah and without looking at them announced go ahead the
01:16:26
group is a rock band formed in the 1980s [Music] i think and then it's your book report what the bad means to me is
01:16:40
their use of drugs because when you see them perform they are more enjoyable when they use drugs that's correct i've never had
01:16:53
i've never had a more accurate description in my life to a t that's perfect yeah just a bunch
01:16:59
of drug addicts now you look in the camera right now yeah and you say thank you for for listening and about me and
01:17:06
grateful dead of my brokerport and thanks for being a bad friend you take us out thank you for listening to me on my
01:17:12
class discussion on the grateful dead thank you for being a bad friend very good the best [Music]
01:17:25
hello fred oh my god you know i love hellofresh andy no i mean don't [ __ ] call me auntie you [ __ ] why i hate it it doesn't matter you call me
01:17:37
bob i hate that okay fine you're right okay one two three hello fresh you know what andy yeah bob
01:17:44
[Music]