00:00:00
hey we got the B we got the we got the merch the bad friends merch bad friends
00:00:06
merch look we've got the uh the fans submitted we're working with the fans on designing the merch now and this is one
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of the hoodies that we've got and this is embroidered this is embroidered and that one says I'm Bobby mom and can I say something and it's uh beautifully
00:00:18
embroidered it's it's it's patched on there it's gorgeous uh and it's at bad friends merch.com go to badri merch.com
00:00:27
this episode of bad friends is presented and fueled by hu your O2 for Complete Nutrition try hu with 15% off today
00:00:33
using Code bad friends at my.u.com badri you two are bad friends who are
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these two idiots a white dude and an Asian dude you two are
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disgusting you two or something we're bad friends come here what
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somebody look at this I can't see what that what is that just come please look at it what is that oh no is that dip is
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that like a uh what is this area right here dude that's a croissant jelly type [ __ ] look at this area right here I see
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it yeah what is the white thing taste it maon no no no no don't don't taste it but but listen paper can
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you can you clean that or do we have those disinfectant Rags I this is insane
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dude you clean his side but you my side like this they don't clean my side I just don't get it dirty like you
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do that's a big difference mhm what are you doing bro nous just wipe it just
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wipe it you don't let it soak it doesn't evil laugh evil left all right that's good
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I'm letting it soak it doesn't soak no you don't no you don't know how to soak it dude it's fine let's go I soak so
00:01:46
good Mormons do some people do Mormons are the big so people Super Soakers
00:01:51
Mormons are the Super Soakers of the world yeah and then what's a kid that goes underneath the bed and rocks the bed what's his name H so they soak right
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they they can't have movement so they stick the wiener in they don't move it and then someone goes onto the bed and pushes it the kid from The Grudge that's
00:02:05
what right that's who it is I call it the kid from the grud see look at this shaking the bed in Mormon it's something commonly done by Mormon teens expected
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to remain virgin it's called it's called jump humping jump humping so the guy
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gets under the bed and moves the bed last night where were you I was at home I was at my friend's
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show I didn't feel good last night oh yeah can't you tell I'm all clogged up oh my back is killing love you dude
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okay stop now I know I was supposed to go last night I texted I texted show today I apologized last night I'm at The
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Comedy Store and I see this sickly guy not sickly handsome skinny you know
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talented you mean in shape that's what I meant yeah like an in shape guy you're right you're right yeah okay that's
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resentment talking I think yeah dud put that away let let me put that aside holster that put that in the holster cuz
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you're looking skinny lately how many people on how many people on tour commented that the OIC must be working because you look skinny heard the whole
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trip Jeremiah Watkins last night called me fatty he goes what's up fatty and I
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could I could not believe it yeah but he's like paper he's like a whispy thin guy he attacked me anyway um why did he
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call you fatty I don't know why what who started it he did he just came up to you and goes hey fatty yeah wow it was
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incredible and that Dr Phil stuff's going to his head huh I think that's what it is till con till con kill Tony I mean is that
00:03:33
our version welcome back to till con till Cony and Dr Phil got to his head yeah
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anyway um so last night this guy comes up to me yeah Morgan Jay is that Jay Morgan or what
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what did happen it's Morgan J okay you really think his you is you think Jay Morgan you've known him I know but I
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thought he switched it no I've never heard anyone with the last name of J everybody says Morgan Jay Morgan all the time I don't know why that happened
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because of two first names I yeah I guess that's your fault my first middle name my fault can what's your real last name ven chin are you really venty
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chinue means uh 25 yeah no don't do that what's your real last name he doesn't want no it is venty chinue no chance
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it's not venty chinue give me your ID are we introducing me yet no yet no we're just doing this right I swear you
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let us take control of the show vent chin all right vent chin there's only one part of that last
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name I love I can't believe this guyun I can't believe look I
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swear my house every wow they won't even let me bro he even has a hot driver's
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license photo how hot he is dude he's hot in the photo he's got a side he's side chin he's doing one of these yeah
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your middle name I went to my first I no no it's my always my middle name for Morgan J Morgan J Morgan J vent 25 yeah
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25 yeah it's a weird last name there's a whole weird story in Sicily about okay you're cilano cilio let's [ __ ] here go
00:05:00
same dude man you are [ __ ] hot everyone else has to Face Forward when they take the picture and they usually
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say don't smile he's so hot they let him go sideways and smile you are a hot guy
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you're [ __ ] sexy Morgan J is in the building give it up for Morgan J I had an intro man yeah it was taking too
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[ __ ] long yeah it was too long oh yeah yeah can I well can I not yet can I just say what I'm going to say and then
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oh yeah say what you want let me say what I want to say say what you want to say say what you want to say this is his favorite let him do this
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[Music] drink away he hangs out with Benny hops little
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two eyes Jimmy the cricket he knows Jimmy the cricket he knows Jimmy the cricket
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how long you know Jimmy the cricket how long you know Jimmy the cricket any all right
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so so last night he comes up to me nervous yeah he's hey he goes I'm a little nervous I about what he goes I
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wrote down questions no I wrote down talking points okay it's not quite I wrote the in sorry
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go ahead I'm I'm going to I'm I'm going to show you Andrew every time you interrupt him he's going to do the [ __ ] guy
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that's that's the let me see some of these this is what I showed him all right so some of the questions that he wrote down or some
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of the to talking points making this list because I feel like I'm not a good podcast guest did Whitney's podcast she
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never put it out did dumbfounded podcast we had to redo it I did I did I did
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Tiger mil podcast you didn't put it out yeah tiger oh the yours no not mine Jang uh Jang Yang sum oh Jang Summers J wait
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wait hers is called tiger Milk Tiger
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mil tiger mil yeah she's your Protege she called hers tiger mil yeah I don't
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[ __ ] know I guess yeah I'm going to get this okay whacked all right so listen you did
00:06:54
Whitney and she never put it out no she never put it out but that's also cuz she could have taken the wrong pill that day and forgot to post
00:07:00
then you had a colonoscopy on Friday yeah and the drug they gave you felt good what the the Michael Jackson drug
00:07:06
like propanol oh Pro propenol right it was good that's good Carlos don't nod so
00:07:11
can I just finish my intro real quick brother we're already there no I'm not there yet he says another thing that
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that he says another thing what do I say I'm so nervous I'm with somebody right he gives me the list who are you with a
00:07:22
comic a young lady oh nice lady then he goes I of I didn't even ask he goes I
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got a viac to me stop you then he goes I swear to God he goes you want to see it stop I was so nervous I just I go on the
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Pao I go I go I didn't even ask I didn't even ask you're the guy who shows his P to audiences I and then right he goes do
00:07:44
you want to see it yeah and I go we're in the patio there's people around what the [ __ ] is your problem but he's the
00:07:50
guy who shows his pubes to people on stage I thought it was this makes sense it was like I thought that was your energy this makes sense oh you can't M A
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you can't you can't match my energy what was this okay you can't match it my my energy is
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my own frequency you can't match it did OIC shrink your hands look at your little finger I know dude everything
00:08:12
when you went like this fing I wasn't really going to do it but I was nervous and I just was vom can I see it I do
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want to see it me yeah can I I could I'll you really want to see it I'd love to see we not going to put it on camera but I'd love to I want to see it you got
00:08:23
to see it I don't want to see it I want to see it I refuse to see it I got to see it why'd you get a bisectomy you're because you never want to have kids okay
00:08:29
look there's there's a scar right there okay you have nice testicles dude there's one on the other side too t are
00:08:35
very very pink you you you're real bald well I I I shave my balls you shave with
00:08:41
a razor or with like a like aing it down I shave with a razor most of us Italians
00:08:47
we don't shave our balls no I shave I shave with a razor yeah you go down on women yeah [ __ ] Italians don't throw
00:08:52
that neither we don't throw that oh that was in The Sopranos right he didn't want to eat his his that used
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to be real fa faux paw for Italian American to go down on it was like you suck my you want to see it you I just
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saw it you didn't see it I saw the pink sack all right nice color beautiful sack
00:09:08
beautiful sack so I'm sorry dude no I'm sorry wait let's back up you're 37 years
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old yeah and you got a aect toy because you never want it you're like no kids ever are you married yeah I I got a I
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got a serious partner I'm with but uh we're in an open thing and uh you know I'm dealing with something right now
00:09:26
currently we don't know for sure if this girl is like lying or not about it pregnancy that kind of put the fear of
00:09:32
God in Me just was like you know you got to change things Bo what I tell you no what I tell you no you told what I tell
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you I mean you told me last night what the [ __ ] I tell you so you don't [ __ ] Oho you don't [ __ ] girls you don't go
00:09:43
Midwest [ __ ] them yeah you got to you told me Miami isn't that where Whitney's kid is from Miami no but another comic
00:09:50
Another comic was like you got to hook up can I have my phone back no okay another comic was saying like you can't hook up with girls in small towns if you
00:09:56
do it in a big city it's like oh I didn't tell you that oh yeah you told that somebody told you yeah wait a minute because if you do it in a small
00:10:02
town she'll probably have the kid no it's just like you're like I don't want you you're like the coolest thing to happen in that town like if you if you
00:10:09
[ __ ] a girl Miami she'll [ __ ] a football player the next day you know or before she [ __ ] you yeah exactly yeah literally or you might be the appetizer
00:10:15
and then she but yeah but me me and my me me and my girl we we've we've already like talked about how we don't want to have kids and stuff you don't bag it no
00:10:22
I do I do and this this this my come was nowhere near this person so now I'm like
00:10:27
oh that's even okay what do you mean what do you mean he's saying the person that claimed pregnancy he there was no there was no intera there was no
00:10:32
transactional jizz yeah no trans sometimes I can redirect my jiz and and and they haven't and I I really can your
00:10:39
your jiz walks like an old Asian man with his hands behind his back strumming through the street a break to smoke by
00:10:45
the time by the time it comes out of your penis sludge yeah she's gone she's already at home she's gone yeah yeah anyway um but yeah so I got and just out
00:10:52
of an abundance of caution and also you know the next four years are going to be tough on women so I figured i' get my nuts snipped off anyway all right cuz
00:10:58
Trump might take take I did this before the election I did this in September you did I this in
00:11:04
September yeah you have cute bulgy eyes I'm not high bro no but the bulin I like oh I brought you guys a gift you smoke
00:11:10
weed in general or no I'm kind of don't do anything anymore you quit you just I I'll have a drink like for special
00:11:16
occasions but outside of that good for you do I I I know you guys get a bunch of free [ __ ] all the time and you guys
00:11:22
might you don't have to keep this you can give it back to me if you want but I know you wear beanie sometimes he loves beanie I have the LOL hahaa beanie love
00:11:29
throw it this is fantastic I have these two lighters this one's for you love one's for you yeah that one's not for
00:11:35
you oh look at this it's a oh it's titties this one this one's for you yo this is great oh you sell these at your
00:11:41
show docen I I got those I got those in uh I got those in your I got those on my
00:11:48
and I just yeah you can have it and then these are the what's your name bro hat let me see oh okay this is this is from
00:11:54
your show this is from the show wow so I don't know you feel free to give it to somebody El no this is I'm going to wear
00:12:00
this I rock this you know what's so funny let's just hide the lighter so I don't have to block them for the whole episode okay do you have to block that
00:12:06
it's a it's a YouTube now go ahead Express Yourself
00:12:12
can you uh hit me a little song there do you want like inspirational piano music or inspirational yeah okay let's
00:12:18
see oh no I have another one no we like
00:12:27
that there are times on the podcast when I'm sick and tired of the spaniard's
00:12:35
[ __ ] why can't we fire him are we waiting for him to be
00:12:40
deported got to go Gotta Go Gotta Go he's worthless a disgusting por of a
00:12:48
[Music] man thank you great thank you thank
00:12:54
you do you like my sound effect I really like it thanks man you know usually
00:12:59
sound effects don't get involved you know I mean but I thought this is the right time sometimes you got to I thought very appropriate is this song oh
00:13:06
yeah oh my God go yeah you turn this up let's
00:13:11
go yeah the badc why is Bobby Lee accusing me of
00:13:18
being on drugs do you want to do some of this you want to try it out okay you could try it
00:13:25
out just get it close to your mouth I know how it works what doesn't sound like
00:13:31
it now I know how it works put away the other mic I know how it
00:13:37
works sick you little [ __ ] Italian
00:13:44
bastard eyes big teeth just like a cartoon character from
00:13:51
Disney [Music]
00:13:59
it's fun isn't it [Laughter]
00:14:06
no you want to try it you want try it
00:14:12
[Music] oo oh my God you got to get closer dude
00:14:17
you got to get closer closer to it you got to get closer to him here we go I never want to give it
00:14:25
back oh my God he's killing it everything inside of me not to lick your
00:14:32
sack you got a great sack J it's
00:14:39
beautiful there it is I'm sick of this as next to
00:14:47
me it's fun dude F fun real fun really fun all right so what I so what I said
00:14:53
was to to Morgan before the show I said I said dude I love what you do yeah I
00:14:59
said but you've also done a a a disservice to our comedy world because
00:15:05
he's so good at this and so it's so wonderful I see people copy him online we're were talking about there's people
00:15:10
in other countries who are doing this now as standups trying to be him and they're [ __ ] terrible there's a port
00:15:18
there's a guy from Portugal doing it a guy from Germany doing it Russia like these different countries are franchise
00:15:23
stinks it's so weird they're like they're trying to do this thing but it's so bad that it bums me out because I'm
00:15:30
it's almost like you wish you could copyright your style do you know what I'm saying yeah because it because it
00:15:36
because whenever somebody if you're weird and you suck but you're unique I like you yeah I said that to him I like
00:15:42
it but if you're weird but I know that you're doing a impression of another guy can't [ __ ] stand it but I mean you
00:15:48
know some people accuse me of being like a kind of like a poor man's Little Dicky sometimes too I get that a lot you know
00:15:53
like only because you're a curly hair bro but we also do the autotune stuff and yeah but Dave but Dave is you know
00:15:59
I've met him three times I feel like I botch the every the meeting every time you know what let's get to this well he's Jewish I want to get to this part
00:16:06
of your personality Italians okay yeah that's a problem this part of your personality why is it why does it feel
00:16:11
like you're like I'm coming in here and I'm have to defend myself to me no to to him like right across from you I feel I
00:16:17
got to defend myself he's always shooting the kid's shooting what is it I can't even I can't believe I'm nervous
00:16:23
dude you dude this I can't don't don't I make you feel comfortable you made me feel comfortable see why are you
00:16:29
shooting so hard at him I'm not shooting hard I can't believe what's going on right now what's going on I can't even believe I can't I'm rattled it you know
00:16:35
here's Carlos called it thank you what is it you get rattled when when when it's a hot guy you do no you don't yes
00:16:41
he does bro yes he always does tell me I'm lying I don't think he's hot you're so full of [ __ ] dude shut the [ __ ] up
00:16:48
that's insane you 100% that that right there is a grave misjustice you wouldn't hook up with him right this right here
00:16:54
is you would hook up diabolic in what context exactly Schindler's List yeah he's not dude he in a shinders list
00:17:01
context where I'm in a camp maybe yeah you mean but no other context mad maybe
00:17:07
in an Amat contest we're in the bottom of on the boat on the boat we're rowing
00:17:13
you're you're well you're not rowing what you're not rowing well I'm you know where I'm at you're in the you're in the co room no I'm rowing but I'm at the
00:17:20
strongman rad team where I don't have to do much I just put my hand on the thing go go go and I'm just kind of going
00:17:27
keeping time yeah yeah yeah that doing the Dr what's that doing the Dr Dr yeah that's not this this isn't Fury Road
00:17:33
okay hear me where I'm that not Fury Road all right I [ __ ] you in Fury so what what did what did
00:17:39
you want to what did you want to bring up yeah what was it it wasn't being aggressive dude it was just an observation I'm so sorry that maybe I
00:17:45
maybe I do come across that way no no no I'm projecting no no no let me change my attitude I think you're right so let me
00:17:52
start over all right here we go yeah go ahead hey what's up what's up man what's
00:17:59
going on thanks for doing it oh I'm so happy to I'm a big fan really yeah I just made a little observation if you
00:18:05
wanted to hear it love to hear it yeah yeah it's just everything comes from a negative lens with you sometimes you know really yeah a little bit but you
00:18:11
know do you you do you L be me and it really good to see you man I like what
00:18:16
you're doing out there I appreciate it man feel better I do yeah that is that better now yeah okay cool was that that
00:18:22
that was the feedback was that it that that I have I thought you had a comment or something that I see like things as a negative no like you know because last
00:18:29
night you're you know no offense if you know I love you you know do you know but but what no I'm
00:18:35
talking hey man see that's what it is I think it's him did you see that no and
00:18:42
no Andrew please back me up okay okay please be real can I ask a question first no make make a comment about my
00:18:48
observation just now he he he's he is he is excited to be here I am so nervous
00:18:54
can I tell you something you don't know this you don't remember this I I think I know what it is what is it it's the four finger point no no it's not that yeah
00:19:01
yeah yeah point with one finger don't go with four because it's dominating no you you go like can I tell you something
00:19:06
with four I don't like it that's good I had two encounters with you fine two fingers now two fingers fine so I once
00:19:12
was on in Venice it was on iini and I saw you walking down the street this was like a year or two ago when I wasn't having the blowup right and I go oh
00:19:18
Bobby Lee what's up you know my buddy Mark Smalls he's like play plays games with you and stuff and and and you were
00:19:23
like are you a funny guy are you funny are you like you were like you were like seeing
00:19:29
that sounds exactly are you funny and you like you like grabbed me a little bit like tussle me like kept walking and
00:19:35
I was like okay and then and then uh the second time I was at the Improv I I can't
00:19:40
believe this is unbelievable this is unbelievable I
00:19:46
can't believe this the second time wow continue friend it it was at the Improv
00:19:51
and I and I was so excited cuz we in the same lineup and he was coming in the in the The Green Room and he goes oh my God
00:19:56
you're so talented do you [ __ ] a lot when you're on the road like that was exactly that was like how quick it came
00:20:01
so it was like very quick like boom and I was like oh [ __ ] and I really wanted to like I don't know what you know it was like I wanted to give you the right
00:20:07
answer I don't know what the right answer was that's how he operates you must [ __ ] a lot right you're a good-looking guy never said that that's
00:20:12
insane you did either one didn't happen say it to me right now I'll pretend I'm Morgan and say that exactly what he said
00:20:18
I'll walk in the room and do it oh yeah walk in the room and let me see say that say what you're sexy as [ __ ] you [ __ ] oh
00:20:24
you're doing great I I like your [ __ ] online the road ready oh my God you're so no I'm I'm me you're no I'm I'm you
00:20:31
you're me oh hold on I'm not done I got to be you go back up back up for a second I Gotta
00:20:37
Be You real quick get those eyes open get my wide eyes wide eyes there you go all right go
00:20:45
ahead oh oh my God you're so you're so Talent You're such oh thank you I do
00:20:53
autotune oh man this sheer disrespect I do a lot of a
00:20:59
why and and and I've seen how Bobby isn't you know oh yeah go do it over do
00:21:05
it again cuz I have another line I want to
00:21:11
go you need the mic anyway um but you did say that to him for sure that sounds
00:21:17
no because people make exaggerations about my my encounters with them I'm being real you think you're Bill Murray
00:21:23
or some [ __ ] or what isn't it Bill Murray he does that no what I'm saying is people go oh I met Bobby Le did this
00:21:28
I never did that yeah you I mean so it's like I don't know I don't remember those in that's how I remember it but well
00:21:34
yeah I remember probably different yeah and that's the thing about storytelling yeah that's the thing about
00:21:39
you know you ever see the movie Rashon yeah rashan you know what I mean
00:21:44
is that rashan where it's like it's four people three people telling the story of one thing yeah from their all their
00:21:51
different points of views okay so in this rashan context right my point of
00:21:57
view is this I saw you in v in in on Venice AB Kenny yeah right and I go oh
00:22:03
he's cool and I go how's comedy going that's how I remember it and then in the
00:22:08
Improv this is how I view it I go oh I love your [ __ ] online you go yeah yeah and and then you go you said I get a lot
00:22:15
of girls and I go oh that's cool because that happens when you rise that's my point of view that's how
00:22:22
you yeah that's how you thought it happened that's how I know it happened in my point of view yeah there was another time at the store too that I'm
00:22:28
recalling you go you see now go ahead where well I was just trying I've said hello to you cuz I just assume somebody
00:22:34
like you wouldn't remember who I am and so he's got a great memory yeah
00:22:39
he does the kids got a memory like a [ __ ] elephant and so I I said yeah I think my buddy Andrew Lopez did uh did
00:22:45
your podcast and uh like I don't know you also like I
00:22:51
think you asked again if I was funny or not CU we didn't know you I don't think you knew who I was and you kept asking if I was funny you you are very funny
00:22:58
yeah Bobby dude this is a key case of confabulation
00:23:07
confabulation confabulation welcome to
00:23:12
Andrew's [Laughter]
00:23:18
[Music] new you li Italian master you look like
00:23:26
a sick t from the Goda
00:23:33
[Laughter] [Music] mov I really like you
00:23:40
though I like you God it's
00:23:46
beautiful wow very good beautiful very good manc
00:23:55
hey everyone Jing Jing Jing Jing Jing with the creeping up faster than your aunt's fruit cake recipe I've got
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00:26:42
passions we met only one time right uh we did uh we did a show in Venice many
00:26:48
many years ago and backyard oh in a backyard it was a big show was a got Ben Blanchard I was rning interesting cuz
00:26:53
Andrew doesn't do backyard this was a long time ago before he was a actor inter never done a backyard show I
00:27:00
thought Ricky was great thank you bro that's also a crazy lie during Co I did outdoor shows all the time I did one you
00:27:07
know the kid there's a kid on the east side who had a show and had a treehouse in his backyard do you know what I'm talking about yes I did that you never
00:27:13
you didn't you never wasn't it Santa Monica or Santa Monica no Santa Monica was right no no no there's I guess
00:27:19
there's a lot of treehouses on the east side I can't see you going to at Venice to do a back this was a long time ago
00:27:25
brother before this was like pre2 like 18 back in the day I went everywhere I used
00:27:30
to drive down to [ __ ] I used to drive down to Dana Point to do shows Dana
00:27:37
Point okay you know where that is I love it you don't know where that is no I don't know where it is no it's the last
00:27:42
City before you get to the military base on the way to San Diego I used to drive down there I used to drive to [ __ ]
00:27:47
Orange County all the time for shows man I'd put in the [ __ ] work we weren't all mad tv kids that got to just do the
00:27:53
store all the time some of us had to [ __ ] oh God oh God grind my def
00:28:00
my my defenses are coming up low rip dude be a nice guy good to see you good
00:28:06
to see you touche thank you really great tour we went went to Australia no I'm not
00:28:11
talking about we're not going to talk about that today uhuh my brother's really excit him on the podcast he listens to the podcast what's his name
00:28:16
Jack shout out to Jack I'm not going to tell you how he described the podcast but he's excited about what did he say
00:28:22
he said yeah I like that Pock I can't tell you you're you have to tell you have to tell yeah go ahead with the Irish dude in the fat asian guy that's
00:28:29
what he said that's the alternative name for the show The Irish D and the fat asian guy not fat anymore not fat
00:28:36
anymore that's what he said zi is is cooking he loves the pka yeah you know it's so it's so fun because it's here's
00:28:44
what's fun about life I just can't believe it what can't you believe I mean it's just like lie you'll never meet the
00:28:50
guy lie lie no you had to tell the truth truth is always funny yeah it's an incredible but um wow okay next time you
00:28:56
cough into the mic put it on the auto tune okay I want to hear autotune cough you're sick too aren't you I thought you
00:29:02
guys make fun of each other on this podcast we do we do yeah we do we do that's our whole now so far now so far
00:29:09
you know you've done other podcasts and you thought you did bad on the other how do you think you're doing on this one I don't know dude no no be honest with me
00:29:15
how do you think you're doing I think I'm doing mid I think you're doing very great yeah you're fantastic it's great see if he gets released I
00:29:22
know that is that's the guy that guy could not release it he's the guy yeah
00:29:28
he's our little magician yeah I think you're doing a great job thanks man yeah and um welcome thanks for having me this
00:29:34
is awesome all right so let me ask this let's move on from the masectomy thing I want to cuz you brought talking points at you had a colonoscopy on Friday your
00:29:41
father had yeah you died in colon cancer I'm Sor how old were you six 6 years old
00:29:46
was like 31 years ago yeah wow dude yeah and then my I got my mom remarried my stepdad has
00:29:51
Parkinson's like 30 years yeah maybe it's you that's you know what T I'm sorry bro
00:29:58
bro it just came out I know no dude I apologize when you said that it rang true with me it did you know what dude
00:30:04
it rang true with me I didn't want to say anything I want to see that earlier yeah he bad luck or could be the Vietnam
00:30:11
War and agent orange I don't know that could be it too interesting you could bring it back to the Asian [ __ ] very interesting you did that yeah
00:30:18
that's incredible yeah maybe it's co what's next what' you have for lunch Panda Express cut it out dude cut it out
00:30:24
wait wait a minute how old is the gentleman of Parkinson he's uh 77 terrible so awful and and this guy was
00:30:30
your dadas he raised you just more or less yeah yeah and and is he are all his
00:30:36
functionality is is still there or is he kind of you know on good days it's like it's you know he just has slow speech
00:30:43
but U you know on bad days it's like he's not talking at all and it's just like that's terrible slow slow slow
00:30:48
blinks a lot of coughing at the uh at the dinner table and stuff like that it's funny when people bring up um stuff
00:30:54
like that I tend to laugh but it's not I'm not mean no a defense mechanism I understand like ramsy at The Comedy
00:31:00
Store his dad's losing his mind you know mean when he first told me he goes my dad's like losing his mind and then you
00:31:06
know you know what mean I was like you that was like my first that's because I just can't deal with it like if I'm at a
00:31:12
funeral It's Your Instinct if I'm a funeral I'm going to laugh like one time my brother at a funeral right and we heard a knock and I go look anti H is
00:31:19
trying to get out and then my then my brother started laughing like uncontrollably yeah so it's just in you
00:31:25
know in uncomfortable situations I'm wiing back at him he's looking at me
00:31:30
I love you dude yeah I love you dude dude you and I we should have been Pals long ago let's
00:31:36
play some fortnite together or Call of Duty or something yeah yeah war zone or something where'd you grow up jersey
00:31:41
about an hour outside of New York love a jersey kid I was it I was in uh freshman where were you at 911 high school high school yeah me too
00:31:49
one of my one of my favorite classes too what class was it Spanish Spanish [ __ ] up my Spanish class I was I was in
00:31:56
English class were you and and we had people in our town that worked in the World Trade Center area remember the
00:32:01
girl I remember the girl right behind me bro burst into tears and ran out of the room cuz they showed it was like on TV it was crazy wow wow what are you
00:32:08
talking about 911 is that in your topics no it wasn't but I don't know I'm I'm running around a list
00:32:15
now that was very good I feel like that was on the list yeah yeah yeah this is kind of wild yeah this one says promote
00:32:22
Hamas wow yeah okay go ahead brother yeah go ahead dude yeah that's on you this is a good platform yeah I guess
00:32:28
uh this one here we go go here we go we
00:32:37
go yeah keep going keep going ride the middle ride the middle of
00:32:44
Hamas come on yeah ride the [Music]
00:32:54
middle really good dude will you once will you once Noone no once grab it we you just say you sing sing Allah Akbar
00:33:00
once in there yeah yeah H Allah Allah Akbar out of context this is going to be
00:33:06
terrible it doesn't it doesn't [Music]
00:33:20
matter I want that as my ringtone so bad no okay hold on this this is good
00:33:27
went to private members Club at in Disneyland 33 you went to Club 33 yeah I went there my refs got me in there yeah
00:33:33
you know what's fun get get a couple of pieces of paper we're going to write some lines he's going to sing them yeah
00:33:38
get if it's too much you know what I mean yeah this why this is why this is this is fun this is fun let's do this yeah you did so you felt like you bombed
00:33:45
meeting Little Dicky for real yeah so the first time I was like he just moved to Santa Monica and um this is before
00:33:51
the show and everything we're at the California Chicken Cafe on on Lincoln Boulevard he loves that place and I go in there and I go oh Little Dicky man
00:33:57
hey you're so great man if you're ever looking for someone to do like a hook or something it was really nice he was like actually man I'm just trying to do like real rap right now but he was like if
00:34:04
you put your mind in anything you really can achieve like your dreams or some [ __ ] he said some [ __ ] like that you want me to call him and everything do
00:34:11
you know why because I feel like he he's like I really think he's an amazing artist yeah and I feel like he would
00:34:16
what he sees as me what what I would do and I'm probably projecting is I'm just being carismatic with autotune and I and
00:34:23
I think the two things are so different you know but the two things are inherently different so they can't be compared I suppose that's like saying we
00:34:29
both do amplification of voices to microphone we're all different it's a you're still different yeah yeah but he
00:34:35
he he is he's someone that if you're good respect he likes I hope so I hope
00:34:41
he doesn't think I'm I'm going to text him and ask him if he likes you oh God and he's like give don't [ __ ] with that
00:34:48
guy give no context for it you got some of yours already I only have two I only got two as well let's just do two I
00:34:55
can't think of any yeah you can think of another one fun yeah you're sing about the idiots in the booth real
00:35:04
[Music] fast we got some dummies in the
00:35:11
booth I think they have tiny
00:35:19
penises they support him one of them has a crazy bald head
00:35:34
I the ones I have AR probably even
00:35:43
good all can I ask you a question when you're
00:35:49
on your show and people don't sing you know sometimes yeah I get upset It's upsetting to me when I'm watching it
00:35:55
it's like give it a go at least but I'll tell you what those people who give me push back and then there's a couple Clips where we've gotten them to sing
00:36:01
the the the joy that reverberates in the room when we get somebody to like kind of like this exposure therapy to like
00:36:06
sing and come out of their shell and when you crack somebody when you crack somebody and they smile and the whole room smiles and I mean it's and for me
00:36:13
it's exciting you know I was you know I I I got I was doing stand for like six years and I was I was doing okay but I
00:36:19
just kind of got bored with it and all right there wow damn dude that worked I thought I can't believe I remembered how
00:36:25
to make a paper airplane hello Los Angeles we are paper
00:36:32
airplane all the way all the way hello everybody we are B every all the way
00:36:39
from P Korea everybody yo can we name our our first yeah paper airplane is yeah yeah
00:36:45
yeah yeah we are here we go paper airplane fly fly fly all over the world
00:36:51
paper airplane coming steio girl yeah really good here we go I have three
00:36:58
and if they don't exactly what I thought would happen this okay if they don't work just
00:37:05
I'll make I'll make it work they'll make it work 100% yeah I went to so many Dy
00:37:12
[Music] parties can we freak
00:37:17
[Music] off give me that baby o give me that baby o put it on my
00:37:30
all right good one it's the next one you know what I like I like the taste of
00:37:38
children's toes with those little p in my
00:37:46
mouth put some Diddy oil on them get it nice and
00:37:54
slippery yeah this so good finish it take it home
00:38:03
[Music] [Laughter]
00:38:14
[Music] yeah they're combined probably in
00:38:19
those mine are so good [Music]
00:38:28
yeah yeah Bobby where are you [Music]
00:38:34
from Kore [Laughter]
00:38:45
Ching Hong Kong fried rice next one next
00:38:50
one does anybody know some dwarves here does anybody know some dwarves in the
00:38:58
room anybody knows some dwarfs because did you know that when dwarfs
00:39:04
fart they fly just a little did you know that if you get a
00:39:12
seahorse and you put it with a dwarf you got ocean
00:39:19
Cowboys little cowb oh it's so good swiming through the
00:39:26
o how do dwares touch
00:39:32
themselves I always think about that when I see
00:39:40
them oh bro very good very very good very good did you write the dwarf Cowboy
00:39:45
this little water no that was he added that mine was the farting yeah the farting right which I ended it there but
00:39:51
then he added then you also added more of the ching chong Kong yeah that was great you got to continue yeah CU ch ch
00:39:58
pong's not good enough you got to say h fried rice from Hong rocket money I'll tell you this pal
00:40:04
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00:42:30
guys feel like like from this point like you you've achieved everything you wanted to no yeah I'm good I'm out I'm I
00:42:37
feel I feel I felt bro I felt good last year I was everything at this point is just like extra for me I kind of like
00:42:44
happen you know I think we've always said like as soon as we could employ and
00:42:49
have fun with our friends that was like we beat the system yeah we can like work with like literally everybody in here is
00:42:55
a friend of ours from many years ago except for one guy that's newer but we still love but like that guy is my
00:43:02
oldest friend in Los Angeles like and we work together I've known him for a very long time yeah but we our goal was just
00:43:07
if you could work with your friends and make [ __ ] that was like can we do that all the time yeah yeah it really is this
00:43:13
year was the first year I started bringing my like openers and friends with me and it's it's literally been a whole let's call Dom though no we
00:43:21
already know cuz I did it with a friend of mine B and Baza we were like all over I like B wrot Dave yeah yeah Bam's great
00:43:28
and we we uh we were just kind of all over the place and it wasn't editable so we just I just did I'm going to lie
00:43:34
you're not with me okay okay just watch this they're old friends so this will no no watch you are I'm saying I'm old
00:43:39
friends yeah yeah it'll be worth it is he still mad at you well we'll find out what up yo dude what's up so it's so
00:43:46
crazy dude I ran into [ __ ] Morgan J yeah and he was like Yo dude that
00:43:52
[ __ ] dumb made me do his podcast twice it was [ __ ] [ __ ]
00:43:57
and I'm like no seriously what [ __ ] happened dude nothing happened man he
00:44:03
just did it because the he did the first podcast and it was bad like what the
00:44:08
[ __ ] happened though dude he's not really a great podcaster so it just I I just didn't get any good
00:44:15
things so because he was also with my other comedian homie B biniam yeah and they were like not riing well so I got
00:44:23
him on again how' he do the second time I thought he did great the second was better so I'm glad we did it again yeah
00:44:30
good good good yeah do you think we should have him on our show
00:44:35
Morgan yeah for sure why but really though why yeah because I've heard bad
00:44:40
things from Whitney stuff you know other people have said it like that he's not like he's stiff and he doesn't know how
00:44:46
he doesn't know how to add information he's a kind of a diva is he a diva uh no he's not a diva I mean he's
00:44:54
definitely making noise you know but you know when you look doesn't it not look like a rat to you like this [ __ ]
00:44:59
teeth and the way his face just comes out like a rat no being I'm being real is Morgan
00:45:07
there or what I'm right here bro there I'm on the podcast right I was nervous about having a bad
00:45:15
podcast I [ __ ] knew it you [ __ ] prick I love you dude we love you you're
00:45:21
the best bro Morgan's good
00:45:27
that's a perfectan Morgan Morgan's Good's good dude no he's real good no because you
00:45:33
even said I mean if you you were like you you're self aware there are times I do podcast I'm like that was I was
00:45:39
[ __ ] terrible yeah I even said I was like I don't know how you guys are going to edit this together this was crazy what well uh his first one like this is
00:45:46
there's no way I've done that where you do them and you're like dude can we not put that out do not put that out do not put that out
00:45:53
or you give them a million notes you got to cut that out cut that out cut if you were like in a bad place sometimes during the day you're coming from and
00:45:58
you're like brother I'm not in a good I shouldn't have done it it's crazy how you came right from doing your own podcast you just like doing podcast do
00:46:03
you have one after this no no no why we do that [ __ ] all the time this is ex
00:46:08
like I tried to do a podcast but it wasn't in me I'm more I'm I'm trying to do the live streaming stuff I'm trying to be like kaat see I don't want to do
00:46:14
live streaming well I here really we don't here's the what works for us we just absolutely do not prepare anything
00:46:21
that's right yeah you you were mad at this list no we just kind of just show up and like you know because do it and
00:46:27
sometimes we don't AER it some of us prepare yeah what do you mean you're we
00:46:33
have stuff slotted for the show sometimes better not to prepare that's right yeah well that was fun like that little thing we did we didn't know we
00:46:39
were going to do that it depends on it depends on what show but sometimes we have to prepare yeah but mean I mean you
00:46:44
must have some guests who you think are going to be like pulling teeth right no like a lot of times I'll coordinate with these guys on bits that we're going to
00:46:50
run on the show but Bobby will Bobby Bobby is a um it's like a hidden camera show for
00:46:58
him he's never he's you know what I mean like he gets to show up and you're he's
00:47:03
always the [ __ ] bit Yeah but that's the beauty is that we tee you up to fly free wonderful do you not know that we
00:47:10
do work behind the scenes I understand that you do work like here's a video
00:47:15
that we're going to watch but what I'm just saying in general about like how we're going to open or the things that
00:47:21
we even said in the first 45 minutes we didn't plan no we did not none of it that's right yeah we just kind of ride
00:47:26
the wave and sometimes the wave isn't ridable yeah just a swell just a swell
00:47:33
it's a one footer dude yeah it's a one footer and then sometimes we go we can't release that footage yeah I get it you
00:47:38
know you can't yeah you can't put out one footer dude you know can I just say that you're it's like your eyebrows have
00:47:44
like they're like Hitler mustaches I just got them done okay right before this I literally was like I like I like cleaned myself up but they're like L
00:47:50
literally short are they usually longer or no I mean if I didn't do anything it'd be a unibrow for sure theyed you
00:47:55
get them thread them thre yeah I had a ni nice girl from Bangladesh did him for me you know about that threading oh yeah no we yeah have I prefer that to the uh
00:48:02
kala I used to take her to the threading place I see you see them do it they thread it you've never had to trim shout out beauty secrets on Venice boulev no
00:48:09
on Washington Boulevard beauty secrets you've never had to do trim your eyebrows no I've never trimmed anything
00:48:15
except for my mustache oh yeah how often you do that once a month when I can taste my hair then I what does it
00:48:22
usually taste like why sometimes I go wow this pastrami sandwich is rough and I go oh my little mustache is getting
00:48:28
into the you know what I mean when you guys have a slice of pizza like do you smell it afterwards for a little bit like the cheese I'm a gerap I wash my
00:48:34
face I just want you to know I know I sound i' I'm not like a contagious no no
00:48:40
I know Andreas is any is sick anyway he comes into the studio sick every [ __ ] week you guys get sick a lot when you
00:48:46
tour no we didn't get sick at all Australia we didn't get sick no I don't get sick much I have a good immune
00:48:51
system but he does he does bring his [ __ ] ass baby and his [ __ ] wife works in a hospital so this [ __ ]
00:48:57
[ __ ] here every week I'll immediately be like oh you've been sick and I'll go you're sick and then what do you say every time I go are you sick what do you
00:49:02
say I was I was I'm over it yeah he's always over it so the day that he gets healthy is we pod the next day just a
00:49:09
coincidence that he's always just over it I get it the [ __ ] liar yeah call him a [ __ ] dirty sick
00:49:16
liar he's a dirty Spaniard liar yeah you're a dirty [ __ ]
00:49:25
SP you [ __ ] colonizer [ __ ] you and your colonizing
00:49:35
friends [ __ ] you f [ __ ] love you thank you do girls when you're with the
00:49:40
if you're with them do they want like you're the hotel or whatever do they want you to turn that [ __ ] on then have you ever done that sing to a girl when
00:49:47
you're singing Have you ever whipped that out and sang while you're in the hotel with no no but I with my guitar I've sing oh really yeah can you imagine
00:49:56
getting head with you're like oh yeah one time so I met I I met this girl in
00:50:01
Cleveland right oh yeah suck those balls be gentle with those
00:50:10
balls put one in your mouth put the second one in your mouth and take that
00:50:17
index finger and stick it in [Applause]
00:50:23
my chicks have to love that [ __ ] though huh they love it I'm guy they like a goofy guy yeah n you're a handsome cat
00:50:29
though too how do you how do you break that up when you're am I fat like your brother said no You' been thinking about
00:50:35
that you're not I've been thinking about the whole time you're down whole time yeah like your brother said Asian that's
00:50:41
what he said the fat asian gu you're Stout dude yeah I'm not Stout no he means you're stocky look at that lift up
00:50:47
your shirt you're not fat you did no you lost weight bro I mean what's up he's on OIC I'm not trying to fight you Dude any
00:50:53
let's move on I got Let It Go I let it go I let it go yeah I let it go yeah yeah tell them what you told me in in Australia though what's going to happen
00:51:00
what's going to happen well I'm going to get ripped bro do you want to we can go to a gym sometime together yeah dude take him it's F you'll see I don't do uh
00:51:08
you know you know what I've been saying on Australia the whole time Morgan JF I may yeah okay yeah it's it's kind this kind of
00:51:15
bullying [ __ ] it's this [ __ ] right here D it's dude it's no it's this no no he
00:51:20
kep the car in the car he kep going I'm going to get jacked I'm going to get jacked I said ripped ripped you can do
00:51:26
it and this guy and this guy cackled like a hyena in the night dude in my
00:51:32
face and I you know what I said to him I kept saying to all these guys you'll see because I love a challenge you can do it
00:51:39
I love a challenge right yes I what I believe in you I in the power of like
00:51:45
you can do it bro everyone I don't think you can get jacked cuz you're 60 or something so that's what I but I think
00:51:50
you get fit fit is different he said he's going to get Jack I don't think you get like ripped Jack whatever you do no
00:51:56
matter how ripped you get it's going to be like a little bit literally proving my point a little bit looser Verbatim
00:52:01
what I said in Australia what he said verba but you'll be like ripped healthy yes Health if that makes sense even like
00:52:08
a 50-year-old who's ripped there it's going to be a little bring up RFK Jr with the shirt off this
00:52:14
cat is in unbearably good shape and you'll never get near this and he still looks kind of fat the rock is do you
00:52:21
know what I mean yeah but the rock is on Tren or some [ __ ] yeah he's on yeah he's on so zoom in look look he's in phenomenal shape you don't think I can
00:52:28
look like that dude but look look at it his belly still is like loose cuz we're not young anymore you're not a kid I
00:52:33
know but I'm still going to look like that's still Me ri that's ripped to me yeah he is ripped yeah yeah and I can't get there there's physiologic there's
00:52:40
just no way you'll ever get I I love those [ __ ] dude you'll
00:52:46
never be I a grasshopper and I fought it with my um okay there's far too much
00:52:53
fake sugar in the world I agree dude take it out I I so everyone
00:52:59
listening to now you heard it first wait 6 months to a year let's do it and then we'll see that'll be you you'll end
00:53:05
you'll be like Alex yeah yeah yeah man I got [ __ ] jacked as [ __ ] frogs are gay you know some some
00:53:12
some people some women like like that bill oh [ __ ] yeah dude that's a really good this is my point women already like
00:53:19
the way he is he pulls beautiful women so to change is weird the same girls
00:53:25
aren't going to find you attractive that's somebody said I already told you I'm [ __ ] corn
00:53:34
Holio yeah really funny I told you the wildest [ __ ] about this guy I did I ever
00:53:39
tell you the story you met him this is my first time here so I've heard no story no but this did I ever tell this on this no the wildest story dude this
00:53:46
is a while ago me and Rogan and George Perez and we're playing in Austin what's
00:53:53
the club why can't I think of it Cap City yeah the old one yeah and we're down there and uh the next morning
00:54:00
George is like you know hey bro we want to [ __ ] get high as a [ __ ] and I was like oh yeah absolutely dude
00:54:06
let's get ripped up and like go down by the ladybird lake or whatever we get [ __ ] stoned and then Rogan is like uh
00:54:12
meet me at the Four Seasons Hotel we're going to have we're going to have lunch okay we're or dinner whatever okay and
00:54:18
he's coming he tells us when we're oh boy when we're there and I was like oh [ __ ] Alex Jones is coming to this
00:54:24
[ __ ] thing W are you are is that like a oh [ __ ] he's coming or is it like I'm fascinated with this guy like like he's
00:54:30
not going to talk to me I'm just going to be near him at a dinner listening to chaos you know what I mean uh yeah
00:54:35
there's a piece of me that was like this is a bad idea yeah I don't want to be [ __ ] photographed with this [ __ ] lunatic but he's like uh he comes to the
00:54:43
dinner and um dude he show there's like armed guards everywhere and he sits down
00:54:48
we outside on the patio surrounded by a bunch of people and he like I said George and I were [ __ ] baked and we're just looking at each other because
00:54:53
we're like this is so strange and uh he brought a girl girlfriend or something whatever she beautiful I don't remember
00:55:00
man she's like a woman I don't know but he's the whole time he's like in the middle of conversations with Rogan like
00:55:05
deep deep they didn't look at you know he didn't look away from once and he would be like yeah that and then you're
00:55:11
the girl this is the girl with with him he'd be like yeah so Joe that's that's the thing that's going on is like frogs are gay that's an emulation of CH
00:55:17
children are gonna be gay like frogs be hot bumping all and then he and then he would stop and in the middle of it go baby baby kissy
00:55:24
kissy no no so funnye my hand to God baby baby kissy
00:55:30
kissy oh my God I love it and she give him a kiss yeah and she she give him a little kiss and then you go and like I said two maybe cuz Kissy Kissy means two
00:55:37
yeah K Kissy Kissy yeah yeah yeah yeah but he wouldn't even skip a beat dude he'd go right back in right back to Rogan and be like and that's the thing
00:55:42
if they're licking frogs trying to get high in the sideon they're also going to be gay turning you gay and you're G me G me no my hand of God oh my God meanwhile
00:55:50
George Perez you know we're [ __ ] cooked so George was I mean so baked we're dying laughing and I can't look up
00:55:57
like I'm just laugh I'm trying to e Mash oh my goding because I was losing my mind it was so surreal it was like one
00:56:03
of those like I'm in a I'm in like a [ __ ] curb episode do you know what I mean I was like does he go licky licky
00:56:08
yeah Su suy baby oh wow that's where sucky sucky maybe came from sucky yeah mean that was the weirdest the weirdest
00:56:15
thing was like a aot uh uh what was two what was sucky sucky
00:56:20
$2 is that 50 years ago 100 years ago is it still $2 that's from a movie right uh $2 sucky SU what Chinatown maybe like
00:56:28
inflation's gone upal Jack you think it's like $80 it was Full Metal Jacket right is it $80 sucky sucky now you
00:56:33
think or 100 no it's like [Laughter]
00:56:42
140f that was so sincere dude that it was so funny dude yeah by the way uh uh
00:56:50
I wanted to put this fact out there to the world because it shocked me when did when did Picasso die Picasso was it was
00:56:57
like probably in the 60s in 80s in the 70s in the 70s I was we're close yeah I thought for sure it was before that
00:57:03
you're probably thinks you're like van go van goth van go van goth who the [ __ ]
00:57:08
is Van goth it's van go but he it's pronounced van goth shut up look it up how do you can I ask you about art wait
00:57:14
but it's go g u g right it's well it's dutch it's like can I ask you about art yeah but we're not bro that's true
00:57:21
that's van G is is Keith Herring good you know my stance what is no have you
00:57:27
seen the doodler the doodle guy that guy's better than Keith har that guy's really great I [ __ ] with that guy Mr doodle yeah Mr doodle I [ __ ] with him
00:57:33
the guy Subway he he painted his whole house in doodles it's crazy bring up Mr doodle real fast this dude is [ __ ]
00:57:39
incredible Keith Herring was this guy's incredible this guy is a magician I've never seen someone so and it's just like
00:57:45
I don't know how it comes out of his brain it's all freehand and it comes out perfect look at that wow that's so dope
00:57:50
and he just did that with like paint and markers and [ __ ] Keith Keith hering wishes he could do that [ __ ] yeah now
00:57:55
bring up some Herring [ __ ] he's dead right but the same could be said for what's his name he did the the the
00:58:00
canned tomatoes or some [ __ ] Andy warhall Andy warhall don't ever don't ever bring his negative light again
00:58:06
these are different these are different because Andy Warhol Andy Warhol look at look look look come on bro please dude I
00:58:12
mean he it was about AIDS he was doing this for AIDS yeah yeah no what no he just happened to have AIDS no no he got
00:58:19
do it for oh my God I got AIDS I got art what he wanted to bring awareness he went and got AIDS just so
00:58:26
he could do the art see that looks like a doodle looks like a that's a Mr I think it's pretty cool dude I think he's
00:58:31
the first guy to do that it's you know what it is it's got sauce it's got It's got swag oh it's great I do like it it's got swag no here here's the problem I
00:58:38
like it but I don't want it okay right it's fine yeah I [ __ ] with it he was he
00:58:43
was he's talented but also like I don't know it was it's fine yeah interesting oh it's no starry night he looks like he
00:58:50
has AIDS right there yeah terrible Bro Look at that he's like I got AIDS
00:58:58
any uh oh here we go an aid song yeah I
00:59:04
have I'm up I got so much
00:59:10
AIDS you got on this podcast Going H Hamas Hamas basat do you like him you know how
00:59:18
I feel about basat he's cool yeah but again like his [ __ ] isn't like wow he's
00:59:23
just cool this is the problem I fit this in cool artist like that's cool but I never go wow I just go that's cool yeah
00:59:30
but I see that on a that's like at a on a shirt at Target yeah yeah that's problem what's
00:59:36
your what's your Korean name uhhuh CH okay
00:59:41
that's no that's you that was a Godfather theme you don't know you
00:59:48
know yeah that's good you don't know my Korean
00:59:54
hung m yeah do it down that's other thing chos son goby that's
01:00:01
[Laughter] [Music]
01:00:06
his how do you know yeah from Dum
01:00:14
oh what is your Korean name he'll sing it s
01:00:24
[Laughter] [Music] wow wow how did you get suu I didn't my
01:00:31
parents did it how did they get it what does it mean I think it means success
01:00:36
you're coming out of like a republic what does that mean what does that name mean it's ISU is my so when you Chinese
01:00:43
people giving each other Wing Wong names and dingdong names oh did they have it
01:00:48
is there a website that has the definition that's that's that's the name of the Virginia Tech shooter oh s s
01:00:55
that's s not W pretty close both suers yeah yeah some SS SS of [ __ ] by the
01:01:02
way you remember wingdings that's what that's what that Texas dude calls uh any sort of Asian writing that's saw a bunch
01:01:08
of wing dings on the [ __ ] wall dud bro Korea is crushing it right now I want to go in what way just culturally
01:01:14
they're just like exporting like that's you shun is the name who ho o o just H I
01:01:19
don't know hu I how do you not know your [ __ ] how I don't know how to spell it they're dancing better they're singing better they're making fried chicken
01:01:25
better [ __ ] crushing it yo be careful about that fried chicken [ __ ] well you know G's taught him how to make fried chicken that is true that is true black
01:01:31
gi's taught him how to do that yeah Korean Fried Chicken is bomb as [ __ ] yeah bro they're [ __ ] crushing right
01:01:37
now yeah film they're crushing it I mean look at the that was the biggest problem with Australia by the way that too many
01:01:43
[ __ ] whites the food was dog [ __ ] yeah I just I always had Thai food when I go to these like us too but you run
01:01:48
you kind of run out of cuz even then you're like all right yeah they that there's too many whites that is a worldly knowledge if you've too many
01:01:54
whites Central Court in your country and not enough others you're [ __ ] your food is [ __ ] [ __ ] we had more bad
01:02:00
Pizza wasn't there a comic who was like if you want to deport all the uh people out of America you shouldn't be allowed
01:02:06
to eat their food like whoever you wanted to pour whoever you wanted to pour you can't eat their their cultural food they don't have extra crispy um
01:02:12
chicken at the Kentucky Fried Chicken in austral it's like soggy BR did you get the Kentucky Fried Chicken in Australia
01:02:18
wasy they said it was really good quality of the chicken is good but they don't have extra fried it's got to be crispy by the way because the best and
01:02:24
and they love KFC but I think our best still to this day is Popeyes I think Popeyes [ __ ] the
01:02:30
hardest I think it's the crispiest that we that we get in America what's the best fried chicken you've had in my life
01:02:35
yeah the Dave Chappelle Fried Chicken the best fried chicken I've ever had was one one of them was definitely at
01:02:41
Chappelle's wow we had chicken and waffles at like 1:30 in the morning after we did CH I couldn't move my neck
01:02:47
and my [ __ ] heart was about to stop was this at his place I could go I couldn't go to sleep because I'm dude I
01:02:52
I thought I was going to have a heart attack that night it was like he had like a world-renowned chef
01:02:58
after we did our show and the show's done we close down everyone's you know party is over he's like we go have
01:03:03
chicken a waffles and I was like where he's like right there and we walked into a room into like a private dining room
01:03:10
and they served us made to order waffles with homemade butter and syrup poured
01:03:17
was Inc like beautiful fries chick damn it was gorgeous and then afterwards he was like let's go dance then it was like
01:03:23
a night start dancing amazing so hanging out with him was pretty tight Dave Chappelle is Willie Wonka of Comedy he
01:03:31
is he is the Dream Maker he makes the it's it's un it's unbelievable his aiz
01:03:37
told a joke about he's like do you really not want to hang out you could you could go home or you could say you hung out with Dave Chapelle or some [ __ ]
01:03:42
like aiz was like had a joke about how you yeah he wasn't I don't know no but he but honestly he is he's like a dreamm
01:03:48
wow where there's guys where you're like oh is that would that be as fun to hang out with him with Chappelle he so generous you could tell you could tell
01:03:54
when you watch him I always said that the comics that are really great are the ones you want to hang out with after the show yeah you know he was like well he
01:04:00
had a store he's like this beautiful store in town that has all the Chappelle gear wow take anything you want he goes
01:04:05
go in there and take anything and we were like no no we'll get a shirt or a hat you know and we walked in there and the people working there were like bag
01:04:12
ready bags were like okay guys throw everything in a bag that You' like it was wild man I was like oh this is
01:04:18
you're just you feel like you don't deserve it yeah where you're like ashamed a little bit but he's the you
01:04:23
know what I mean I hate to say I'm jealous I want to do that it was [ __ ] rat it was rats well we cried yeah we
01:04:29
cried we cried when we with him no I don't I'm sober but you know when we first saw him we said we're going to go
01:04:35
back to the hotel we got in the car and we him and I both started crying that's true really yeah because it so cool yeah
01:04:42
cuz he picked us up in his Jeep at the airport he picked you up yeah we go to private he drove and he picked you up he
01:04:48
literally was leaning against what's up man you know and we got in as [ __ ] it was incredible we he flew Us in his jet
01:04:54
it was incredible and then and then he met us at the airport and he was like well there was a driver there that
01:05:00
somebody had arranged but then he was also there to say what's up and to say like good to see you and then we thought
01:05:06
all right we'll leave him alone and he's like come in my car and then we went in his car is he like funny like out off
01:05:12
stage he like a chill dude or just chill guy or is he just like like you know some you know there's some Comics who
01:05:17
like always kind of on he's not on no no he he's not on but he but it's funny yeah he's naturally funny he's just so
01:05:23
like charismatically funny that like the way he Converses is so he's very intelligent so the way he frames the
01:05:30
world is just funny that's so cool he's the guy dude yeah he's willly Wonka to me that felt like a day I felt like I
01:05:36
was Charlie that's inspiring I I I think you know the whole goal of my life right
01:05:42
and the whole this whole Adventure that I've been on and it's it's been quite an adventure yeah it's crazy is you know
01:05:49
these tiny moments it's not about like okay here we go Adventure yeah wait wait wait let get it out first you get it out
01:05:55
first cuz I like this yeah it's it's about uh every year if something new happens right I think that's more
01:06:02
important than success like you know like when we were in um that island and we saw the little
01:06:08
quas and the had a baby quaka coming out of the belly and then you know I'm taking a selfie with the quaka and I'm
01:06:14
like this yeah yeah it's a moment that I never planned it was a surprise
01:06:21
unexpected adventure yeah and it was um memories
01:06:28
when you build memories I think that's what the point of life is I agree and experiences and it's like you know the
01:06:34
Chappelle thing was that that and I think Chelle and some of the things we experienced with quaca quas yeah and
01:06:41
also um riding scooters in the Park yeah my B yeah 14,000 seats 14,000 sold out
01:06:50
45,000 in Australia sucking in air through an [ __ ] yeah in it out yeah
01:06:57
dude that's a memory so Australia that's the whole point of life I think yeah don't you think yeah let me do mine do
01:07:03
the music yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I love that beautiful it's beautiful dude
01:07:10
yeah yeah at the Sydney airport I had to go take a [ __ ] before
01:07:15
our flight Tak a sh and we were in a rush and I didn't want to be late to the gate because I had a I had a carry-on
01:07:22
bag and I didn't want there to be no bin space so I quickly got up after taking a [ __ ]
01:07:28
a little too fast and leaned forward and my penis brushed against the porcelain of the toilet
01:07:33
seat oh no your dick getting hard of the being
01:07:41
too big that's the problem you know how your dick gets a little bigger that's the you're taking a sh yep
01:07:50
I was engaging my sphincter my dick got a little thicker I brushed it against the porcelain stood there for like an
01:07:56
honest minute and uh now I'm a she now he's a she my kids
01:08:04
have two moms now yeah at the cut I cut my penis right off at the Sydney airport you'll find a little Cheeto and stall 4
01:08:12
Sydney airport he's got a clitter dick a clitter dick
01:08:20
yeah remember I had a meltdown do we every day yeah in New
01:08:25
Zealand no going to New Zealand oh yeah oh my God that was a meltdown you had it was pretty bad it was pretty bad it's
01:08:32
farther away than you think it is I thought they're [ __ ] endless they wouldn't let me on the to Perth they wouldn't let me on the plane oh yeah we
01:08:37
went to Perth too no they we almost didn't let us into the country oh really because his passport up because um well
01:08:44
not just any dog the greatest dog alive yeah yeah and so my dog um Snoop Dog did
01:08:49
it yeah Snoop Dog chewed on my passport Hey cuz give me that pass there's a couple of pages with bite marks inent
01:08:56
and we were about to go and they're like n you can't you know what I mean mate right and I go what do you mean you can't come into the country they
01:09:03
wouldn't let him through the the Biometrics shut so I just sat there while everyone got on the plane and I
01:09:08
was like I guess and then I started having a meltdown he was he was arguing with you were alone did you guys just
01:09:14
leave him there no we had a tour we all had gotten on the plane yeah he was last in the line no Carlos no Carlos stayed
01:09:21
with he was yelling Google me yeah Google me and he was counting down the minutes until when he was just going to
01:09:27
go back to LA he started yelling five really five minutes and then there was like I embarrass I embarrassed my friend
01:09:33
doing something like that in Vegas you mown well no no I had meltdown but I was like trying to use my status to get into
01:09:39
this restaurant uh what restaurant which one it was just in one of the it was like the Venetian I forget we just wanted to get food and there was like it
01:09:44
was like Friday night and I was just like let's just go here and then it was all like young girls who were probably
01:09:50
my demographic yeah and uh just like hey guys I'm on Tik Tok you might have seen me like you sure you don't want I like
01:09:56
sold this place out like wow you did that yeah I did that and he goes he goes
01:10:01
bro that was gross that was gross I know when you who's your boy my buddy chra we
01:10:07
started comedy he was like that was gross but then my reps got me in a reservation at Carbone and he go that
01:10:13
was pretty cool it worked he's like yeah that was cool yeah anyway sorry to interrupt you I interrupted you and told my story no no no but I am the guest so
01:10:20
yeah yeah yeah TR to wet up my story yeah pretty cool stuff yeah did you end up a Carbone
01:10:26
you ended up on Air New Zealand yeah but we ended up we ended up getting in there well you want to wrap it up then sweetheart yeah um let's you know what
01:10:33
let's end this yeah yeah yeah wrap it up wrap up wrap up the show with a song I'd like
01:10:40
that time to wrap up the podcast I had a good time talking with my best friends
01:10:47
yeah Morgan J going to come back again right maybe maybe y maybe yeah yeah
01:10:56
learned a lot about my friends here yeah thank you for being a bad friend
01:11:04
thank you for being a bad friend great man that's so
01:11:11
[Music]
01:11:21
good wo
01:11:26
yeah woo yeah
