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selling a persona of confidence and care, patients trusted him. He wore cowboy boots in the operating room
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Hello. And welcome to My Favorite Murder. The mini-sode. This is the mini version of the episode.
00:01:58
And hence the name Minisoad. Do you get it yet? This is, it's kind of like a cipher where it's parts of words match with other parts of words.
00:02:08
And you are the one that has to put all the context clues together and figure out what we're talking about.
00:02:13
When you figure it out, tweet at us. Tweet at us. Minisoad solved. Hashtag brilliance.
00:02:19
You guys are so smart. That's the whole hashtag. And if you leave one letter out, you're off the thread.
00:02:25
what's happening i don't know you want to go first you go first this time okay we're gonna
00:02:30
read you your shit ready here we go ready go um how police finds bodies that have gone missing in
00:02:36
the water and it creates young murderinos okay hi mfm people and animals i have written in
00:02:42
previously about a few hometowns but recently i had this holy shit recovered memory moment that
00:02:47
may have just been my murderino origin story i grew up on the beach in an extremely tall nope
00:02:53
extremely small small town it wasn't tall it was short i want to live in a tall town
00:03:01
it's it's a area wise it's not big yeah but it goes straight up 25 floors all the way to the
00:03:08
ceiling okay so extremely small college town in rhode island most homes were just summer houses
00:03:13
and college students would rent them for the winter months cool yeah there is this tiny
00:03:17
unassuming beach at the end of my street that people would just leave their little dinghies
00:03:21
pushed up onto the sand. Cute. Then she says, I have the beach cord and it's tattooed on me.
00:03:26
Let's see if I regret that in 10 years. You will. That's cute. I don't think you will.
00:03:31
Where is it? On your neck? Then yes. Then yes. So basically anyone could grab a dinghy and pull
00:03:36
it into the water if they really wanted. But we have like basically no crime other than college
00:03:40
parties. So no one really cared. Anyway, one February night, five drunk college students
00:03:45
decided to take out a dinghy in the middle of the night. No. Well, this is New England. The water is
00:03:49
37 degrees in February. Also, drunk driving rules apply in the water as well. Oh, good to know.
00:03:55
I didn't know that. Very tragically, all five students fell out of the boat and drowned in the water.
00:04:00
No. But only two of the bodies were recovered. So fast forward to the spring, and I was like 11 years old, walking down the beach,
00:04:08
and saw a rock, question mark, that was shaped strangely like a femur, and also one that was curved like a skull bone, question mark.
00:04:16
Naturally, I picked them up, and they were very much not rocks. I literally ran up the street to get my mom to be like holy fuck just found one of the bodies and
00:04:23
she was like let's go fucking look she came down and looked and was like we have to call the police
00:04:28
because you found a body the police came and collected the specimen and brought it to the
00:04:32
station a few days later we get a call from the station that was like what you found was not a
00:04:37
body but pieces of a dummy that the forensic team uh throw in the water to see where the currents
00:04:42
would take the body so please tell your daughter to stop telling people she found one of the bodies
00:04:46
and then it said small town remember yes oh no but actually as i write this seems like they were
00:04:52
they may have been telling me slash my mom this to stop us from excitedly sharing our story all
00:04:57
over town i believe this is the exact moment i became obsessed with true crime anyway you ladies
00:05:02
are amazing also georgia always lock your car doors when you get into the car i got a story
00:05:07
about that one too when two grown men tried to get in my car late at night not once but twice
00:05:12
after I got in and stayed and started the car. Stay sexy and always look out for bodies on the beach, Caitlin.
00:05:18
Sounds to me like, Caitlin, you're giving Georgia advice about locking the door because you didn't lock it twice.
00:05:25
Wow. Well, remember I had the whole issue with my new car and I couldn't figure out how to lock the doors.
00:05:31
Yes. Yeah. I get it. Okay. She's like, this is a hard-earned wisdom I have about locking the door.
00:05:37
The subject line of this one is, 80s moms, don't give a fuck. Hi, all. I heard you were calling for some quote accidental kid injuries and I thought you would appreciate the very 80s approach that my mom had to one of my childhood mishaps.
00:05:50
I was about eight years old and I was for reasons I can remember standing on a chair and I had one of those small American flags in my mouth No No Why why and why When I read it to myself it was funny
00:06:06
but reading it out loud, it's just, it's the beginning of every terrible anything.
00:06:11
Oh my God. I can't remember why I put an American flag in my mouth. Of course not.
00:06:15
And sitting on a chair at the same time. That's like the definition of being a child.
00:06:19
Totally. i was trying to make a mom like a mosaic of american flags i'm pretty sure i was trying
00:06:26
to tape it to the ceiling who knows kids are weird anyway i fell off the chair and when i did
00:06:32
the flag went into my throat oh my god oh my god you could have died it's just an important part of the story is that i had a somewhat freakish tolerance for pain as a
00:06:46
kid. So it wasn't that this was causing me a ton of pain. So I might have ignored it. But when I
00:06:52
pulled the flag out, there was some blood on it. Oh, God, the line we always got as kids was don't
00:06:58
bother me unless you're bleeding. So I figured that I should probably tell someone. I went to
00:07:03
talk to my mom, who was sitting at our kitchen table talking to friends drinking playing cards
00:07:08
and of course smoking. It's just like 80s my entire childhood. Ah, the 80s. Anyway, I went to
00:07:14
tell her what happened and she shushed me because she was in the middle of a conversation.
00:07:18
I said, but mom, and she yelled at me that I should not interrupt adults. She went on to finish whatever conversation she was having and of course taking longer
00:07:26
than normal so that she could teach me a lesson. Finally, when she was done, she told me I could ask her what I wanted to.
00:07:32
I opened my mouth, which was now full of blood. Yes, that's like what you always want, right?
00:07:38
Like with you and the lighting the bed on fire. Yes. I fucking told you this is important.
00:07:42
I fucking told you. Listen to me. You should listen to kids, not your stupid drunk friends.
00:07:46
Now, I haven't read the rest of this, but I will say that if this was me, I would not have opened my mouth entirely.
00:07:53
I would have just sat there staring and let the blood come out on its own. Just to freak your mom out as much as possible.
00:07:58
Dramatic effect. Little Austin Perry, dramatics at all times. Okay, it was now full of blood.
00:08:03
It turns out that the dowel from the flag had gone through my tonsils. Oh, God. Yep.
00:08:10
so as I was telling her what happened blood was literally streaming down my face
00:08:14
of course in typical 80's mom fashion she said why didn't you tell me sooner all in all it turned out not to be a big deal
00:08:22
apparently and it healed just fine I still like to bring this up from time to time just to poke my mom
00:08:28
just to poke the mom guilt I have kids of my own now and the rub dirt in it and walk it off attitude
00:08:33
lives on to this day stay sexy and don't ignore your kids while they are bleeding
00:08:37
from the mouth or do It builds character, Jen. Oh, my God. Is it any wonder we're all so fucked up?
00:08:44
For real. Truly. I just did the Sklar Brothers' Dumb People Town and Dan Van Kirk's podcast, Dumb People Town.
00:08:52
And they were doing a, it was a 2018 roundup of all the things that were found in people's different orifices at emergency rooms.
00:09:00
Fun. And I had a recovered memory while we were talking about it where I'm like, oh, yeah, I went to the, I stuck a piece of like foam from like, like foam rubber, basically.
00:09:09
up one of my nostrils and then left it there no when i was like four and then i just had like
00:09:15
after a couple days i just had green like bright green snot running out of my nose and when my mom
00:09:21
took me to the doctor or the emergency or whatever thinking i had some bizarre infection or whatever
00:09:26
they just put tweezers up there and just pull out this long i mean endless kids are so gross
00:09:34
They're gross. Or kids are gross. But then they're also like the child logic. Where it's like, I'm standing on a chair.
00:09:41
I've got an American flag in my mouth. And I've got a bunch of important things to do.
00:09:44
Or I'm just going to put this up here and leave it there. Yeah. Let's just see what happens.
00:09:48
Yeah. Why can't we just improv this? It's science. This is a science experiment.
00:09:53
I'm a Petri dish. You don't get me. Okay. This one's called Another Killer Dentist Story.
00:09:58
Yes. Hello, Murder Queens, Furry Friends, and Steven. Do you hate that whole thing?
00:10:03
No, I like it. Okay. I was listening to a minisode where someone's mom almost dated a killer dentist and it reminded me vaguely of my hometown killer dentist story.
00:10:13
My first dentist when I was a child was Bart Corbin, based out of Hamilton Mill, Georgia.
00:10:19
It's really confusing when you see your own name. Based out of Hamilton Mill, Georgia.
00:10:23
Ann Rule totally wrote a book about it, and I reviewed it for my seventh grade book project.
00:10:27
Nice. Very cool. Awesome. He always seemed like a little odd, but the man knew how to clean teeth and do root canals, so we didn't think anything of it.
00:10:37
My aunt used to play tennis with his wife's sister, and they seemed like a normal family.
00:10:41
Husband, wife, two sons, white picket fence. This, though, was not the case because in December of 2004, their oldest son, who was really young at the time,
00:10:49
ran to the neighbor's house and told them that someone had shot his mom. When police arrived at the scene, Corbin's wife, Jen, was found with a gunshot wound to the head, suicide-esque.
00:11:00
It was quickly determined that it was a homicide framed as a suicide. The giveaway was that the hand holding the gun was neatly tucked under the covers.
00:11:09
Oh. Yeah. It came out that their relationship had gone south. She had met someone online, and he was having an affair with his secretary.
00:11:16
She was in the process of serving him divorce papers, and he lost it and killed her.
00:11:19
Oh, my God. It came out later that he had done the same thing to his ex-girlfriend he had in dentistry school, Dolly.
00:11:26
She broke things off. He put sugar in her gas tank, stole her cat, and destroyed her final project before finally shooting her in the head and framing it as a suicide in the same way.
00:11:36
I feel like this has been a forensic files. I'm sure it has. The name Dolly is the first girlfriend.
00:11:42
Yeah. The only reason he didn't get caught that time was because a rookie cop responded to the scene
00:11:48
and picked the gun out of her hand after seeing the shot through the head. Needless to say he was arrested for his wife murder and was no longer my dentist But he was arrested for his wife murder So I began to travel to the prison to get my teeth done there
00:12:06
What else was I going to do? My dad was in the middle of a root canal and had to find a new dentist ASAP.
00:12:11
He loved the new guy we went to and told my mom we should start going there since our old dentist was a murderer.
00:12:16
A week later, the new dentist was on the news for child molestation. No! I know a dentist who has never been convicted of anything, thankfully.
00:12:25
Nice. Love the show and all you do. Mads from Georgia. Oh, Mads. Dude, don't let your dad pick dentist anymore.
00:12:32
It's hard enough to go to the dentist's plane. Yeah. Without all those threats and weirdnesses.
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Data accurate as of 220-26. Okay, the subject line of this one is, Grandpa stops a robbery with some unlikely help.
00:14:45
All right, great. Page two. Sup, Karen and Georgia and Stephen. Hi. My dad and I were on a road trip, and we swung by a little house he grew up in with his seven brothers and sisters, his mom and his dad, who was the only police officer in town.
00:15:00
Their house was also the police station. Oh, my God. Where is this? New Zealand.
00:15:08
Okay. Like, that suddenly makes total sense. Right. Seriously, the front two rooms were for police business, and the family kept the bedrooms to live in.
00:15:16
And I think they shared the kitchen. Oh, my God. It's amazing. When I asked my dad what the hell they did when they needed to lock somebody up, he said, there was a shed in the garden.
00:15:26
I don't know if he was joking. So good. Can you imagine growing up at a police station?
00:15:31
I asked dad what it was like for grandpa to be the one and only cop in town. And he said he needed to improvise sometimes.
00:15:38
Then he told me this story. Late one night, Grandpa spotted men with flashlights inside the TV and appliance repair shop, obviously robbing the place.
00:15:46
Back up from New Plymouth would take over an hour to get there. Grandpa didn't want to wait because, of course, he knew the people who own the repair shop and he couldn't just watch while robbers ruin their business.
00:15:57
That's when he saw the lights in the local rugby club were on. I like to imagine that he now said, fuck protocol, before he took off running for the club.
00:16:07
He burst into the room of drinking rugby players. Oh, my God. And asked if anyone would like to help him catch some bad guys.
00:16:16
They were into it. The town didn't have streetlights back then, so Grandpa had to shepherd the rugby players through the pitch dark,
00:16:24
desperately trying to keep them quiet. He positioned them at the front of the shop.
00:16:29
Then he snuck around back, took a deep breath, and kicked in the back door shouting, freeze, police.
00:16:34
The robbers dropped what they were holding and bolted out the front door right into about a dozen drunk, enthusiastic rugby players.
00:16:43
As my dad said, quote, they weren't cops, so they didn't have to hold anything back.
00:16:48
Holy shit. I feel sorry for the robbers. They had not signed up for anything like what happened to them.
00:16:54
And it was dark, so they literally didn't know what hit them. They were scraped off the pavement and sent to New Plymouth for processing.
00:17:01
And the rugby guys would talk about nothing else for days. I think we all dream that one day we'll get to help take down a criminal.
00:17:08
Hopefully we'll be sober and not one of the 12 other huge ass men when it happens.
00:17:13
Stay sexy and help out your local cop, Lorraine. That is a perfect story. Isn't that?
00:17:19
I mean, you can just see it all happening. And as soon as you said rugby players, I'm like, oh, so fun.
00:17:25
Yes. And drunk ones to the best kind. Are there any other kind? Are there any other kind?
00:17:29
Yeah. A. B. How good are they at tackling? And punching. Punching. Punching and tackling.
00:17:35
Yes. It's what they do. And it's like, you can't get by them. That's their whole job.
00:17:39
No. Is to keep you from getting by them. That's a brilliant story. God bless Lorraine.
00:17:44
Okay, this is my last one. Attacked in a bathroom. Aloha from a Maui murderino. I love stories of beating the shit out of awful men.
00:17:52
So here's mine. While at a bar with a couple sorority sisters we went to the bathroom together as a team because the world we live in makes us feel safer in numbers But the line for the women room was too long And this is fucking this is me in my 20s
00:18:05
So I dragged my two sisters with me to the men's room since no one's ever in there, said an overly confident drunk girl voice.
00:18:12
We went to use the stalls and I heard a woman crying in the larger and furthest stall.
00:18:17
Still in my unshy mode, I looked over to see a man towering over her with his pants down and her sobbing in obvious distress.
00:18:25
Without thinking another second, I leaped over the stall and attacked him from behind.
00:18:30
Wow. Because it was the handicapped stall, he smacked his face on the handlebar and lost a tooth.
00:18:36
Yes. I yelled at my girlfriends to take the unknown woman aside for safety while gripping my tiny
00:18:41
arm around this guy's neck. The male bouncers came in and told me to get off him.
00:18:47
But in sheer defense mode, I told them I wouldn't get off of him until, quote, the fucking
00:18:51
cops come and peel me off. Love it. Drunk. I managed to keep my knee on the back of his neck and twist his arm while his face was on the floor.
00:18:59
She must have taken a self-defense class because how do you know to do that shit?
00:19:02
Sometimes, you know, you're the muse. It just like comes through you. You're a vessel of violence.
00:19:07
You're a vessel of Long Island iced tea. And like a bunch of procedural shows that you've watched other people beat people up and take them down.
00:19:16
That's right. From what I remember that night, I got lots of horrified stares at the bump on my forehead,
00:19:21
which I think she meant she fell and hit her head. maybe not the bump on my forehead blood on my sweater lots of free whiskey and a new thankfully
00:19:30
short-lived cigarette addiction probably because uh shit was intense and i needed to take the edge
00:19:35
off drunk cigarettes man i mean is there anything better i bet you that's how they were invented
00:19:40
and why they're invented initially drunk people or cigarettes either one interchangeable my
00:19:45
therapist tells me this came out of the rage i couldn't express in past abusive relationships
00:19:49
which totally makes sense the bright side of the story was that the woman he was victimizing became
00:19:54
great friends with my sisters and I, braved her attacker in court, told her story to the
00:19:58
men and women on campus, and went on to become a lawyer specializing in domestic violence
00:20:03
advocacy. Yes. College sexual misconduct cases are underreported, and brave people like her are sometimes the
00:20:09
encouragement survivors need to share their story and or heal. For any of you who need to hear this, I believe you.
00:20:15
A lot of other murderinas do, too. Stay sexy and strong, M. Yes. How beautiful. Good job, M.
00:20:22
Good job, M. Beautifully written. so true so true all around yeah yeah dive over that fucking fuck yeah also if you're in a po place
00:20:32
like that yeah your risk look yeah you're gonna get a bump on the forehead yeah you might lose a
00:20:37
tooth sure you could break a bone but there'll be bouncers there within minutes yeah you could
00:20:43
even get in trouble yeah get it scrap it up that's right ladies we only have each other we need to
00:20:47
come to each other's aid yeah whenever we can that's right you're right yeah okay i'm not gonna
00:20:52
read you the subject line of this one because it'll give it away okay hey elvis assorted other
00:20:56
animals humans and steven's mustache i think actually that's redundant steven's mustache is
00:21:03
assorted other animals but i'm not going to start criticizing right away i don't know why i've hung
00:21:09
on to this story for so long but since i'm recovering from pneumonia this week i guess
00:21:13
i've got time anyway about 35 years ago i went to the oakland zoo with my parents who probably had
00:21:18
no business being parents to be honest i was only five or six so i don't remember anything about this
00:21:25
trip except this the zoo had a baby hippo named mugs because he was sponsored no what sorry
00:21:32
because he was sponsored by mug root beer oh my god that's the cutest thing i've ever heard why
00:21:41
the name of root beer it's like it's the most uncreative thing you're just like mugs mugs for mug root beer okay luckily it wasn't named a and w because that would have been
00:21:54
confusing hard for the children all right oh parentheses i would love if anybody could confirm
00:22:00
that they had a baby hippo named mugs but i swear i'm not making this up okay close instagram
00:22:05
comments yeah someone will answer that for you somebody might even have pictures that's right
00:22:09
Um, cause that's what I was looking at before we started. I was trying to make sure, um, there's the Oakland zoo, but then there's also a place
00:22:16
in Oakland called children's fairyland that is, I think 60 years old. Wow. And I couldn't remember if those two things were connected.
00:22:24
Cause I don't think I've ever been to the Oakland zoo, but we went to children's fairyland
00:22:27
many times. So fun. It is the best fucking place. My sister recently went there with her class and sent me pictures and all the stuff's the
00:22:36
same cause it's not brand. Yeah. So it's just like there's one thing where there's a whale's mouth open and then you walk into the whale's mouth to get to one of the like to the show area or whatever.
00:22:48
I don't I don't remember. I'm into it. OK. And there's a water fountain that you stick your head into a hippo's mouth to drink water.
00:22:58
That's so cute. And that's what made me think of it. Maybe his name is Mugs. Maybe there's root beer.
00:23:01
It's root beer. It's a root beer fountain. That would be amazing if all water fountains at like children's places like that were just
00:23:09
high fructose corn syrup. It's just a bunch of tang coming out of a hippopotamus in his mouth.
00:23:16
Okay. Anyway, of course there were signs that said something like, do not put arms and legs over
00:23:21
the railing of the hippo pen. So of course, what does my dad do? But put me right on the railing with my legs dangling over.
00:23:27
I guess nobody knew how dangerous hippos were back then. They absolutely didn't.
00:23:32
Really? No. Are they super dangerous? They are super dangerous. They're the number one killer of tourists in Africa or in the Congo or something.
00:23:40
Wherever people go to look at animals in the wild in Africa, they kill tourists the most
00:23:48
because people think they're friendly and cute and ballerinas, but they're not. Wait, they're not ballerinas?
00:23:53
I'm sorry. But yeah, you've been introduced to many a cartoon hippo by thinking that it's a big female
00:24:00
Hippo that also wants to be a ballerina. Isn't that funny and great? No. No? It's not real.
00:24:05
George, I'm sorry. Wait, listen, because this will make you happy. Okay. Well, Muggs being curious and probably hungry came right up to me and swallowed me up to my waist.
00:24:16
Oh, dear. I began screaming. My mom began screaming at my dad and my dad started pounding on Muggs' snout.
00:24:25
I distinctly remember being covered in hippo slobber and the feel of the hippo's teeth clamping down on my legs.
00:24:33
Everybody is losing their shit now, and it seemed like forever, but it was probably only a few seconds.
00:24:37
But Mugs, who was probably confused as fuck, finally let go of me. I guess I didn't taste too good.
00:24:44
The even crazier part was there were no zookeepers around. Oh my god. At least none that I can remember.
00:24:51
Totally traumatizing to kid me, but pretty funny now. anyway i love you all at mfm thanks so much for the show stay sexy and don't get eaten by a baby
00:25:00
hippo james from oakland that's bananas like what if it had been a full-grown hippo i know what if
00:25:08
it had been i was trying to think of a funny thing instead of mug like a pint glass forget it uh
00:25:13
liter bottle yeah um no it's i mean if it was a full-grown hippo that little kid would have been
00:25:19
gone i think oh my god isn't that poor hippo is like what are you doing you just dangled food
00:25:24
into my cage. Yeah, you basically gave me two steaks with some shoes on them. You handed me a snack. What am I supposed to
00:25:30
goddamn do? Now you're hating me about it? You know what? I'm not doing ballet anymore.
00:25:34
I quit, Mom. I quit. Goodbye to the Nutcracker this year. That's right. You can find another fucking hippo.
00:25:41
Good luck. Dance your goddamn dance for you. I don't get to eat a five-year-old if I feel like it.
00:25:47
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