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Default terms at mintmobile.com. Hello. Hi. And welcome to my favorite murder. The mini-sode. This is the one. The little, little one. The baby one. You know what it's like. You've heard it. Do you want to go first this time? Oh my God. Seriously? Why not? Change it up 2020. Wow. Okay. This is a prison guard story. Hello, beautiful people. Oh, hello. Let's get into it. Okay. My dad, he's really my stepdad, but he raised me and my biological dad doesn't deserve the title. Suck it, Dennis.
00:02:54
Suck it, Dennis! You get to write in and you get to say what you want. That's right.
00:02:59
So, my dad was a guard at a maximum security prison in Arkansas for several years during his 20s.
00:03:05
He has many stories about the job, but my favorite has to be the time he was almost murdered by an inmate while working in general population.
00:03:12
Fuck. He became good friends with a lot of the inmates in Gen Pop and really enjoyed his job.
00:03:17
However, there are always some bad apples in prison. Oh. No shit! Who wrote this?
00:03:24
Who wrote this? Ned Flander? What's happening? That one to stir up trouble. And one of these inmates really had it out for my dad for some reason.
00:03:34
One day said... He was the corrections officer. Right. That's why. One day said inmate walked up behind my dad with a shank in his hand made from a toothbrush.
00:03:43
Just as he was about to attack my dad, another inmate saw what was happening, pulled out his own shank.
00:03:49
Uh-oh. Fucking shanks for everyone. But no one's brushing their teeth. Came up behind the bad inmate and stabbed him in the throat.
00:03:57
Oh, my God. Killing him. Oh, my fucking God. My dad remembers hearing a scuffle behind him.
00:04:03
When he turned around, he saw the bad inmate's body on the ground. The good inmate looked at my dad and said, he was about to kill you.
00:04:10
Jesus Christ. I'm a journalist, so naturally I peppered my dad with questions including,
00:04:15
how the hell do you make a shank out of a toothbrush? But he didn't know much more due to the fact that his back was turned,
00:04:20
and they never found out what the inmate's motive was. He was a murderer? Yeah, or, yeah.
00:04:25
That's about it. It's jails. Jails in the place where you start critical thinking and really planning out good stuff
00:04:31
that you're going to do. My dad stayed employed at the prison for a while after that.
00:04:34
The good inmate ended up getting released on good behavior not too long after he saved
00:04:39
my dad's life. Well, you know, I wonder if that was part of the decision making process.
00:04:44
Right. He saved a fucking, yeah, a corrections officer. And probably, chances are, took care of some of his own business.
00:04:52
Amen. I mean, you wouldn't do that entirely just for a corrections officer, would you?
00:04:57
Maybe not. Yeah. Good behavior, including murdering people who are going to murder corrections officers.
00:05:03
You know what all makes me think of is everyone should listen to Ear Hustle because it's a podcast that is made by people who are in prison.
00:05:10
And they tell stories all about this stuff and they can speak to it. Right. They're probably like, yeah, there's lots of critical thinking in prison because you have to fucking stay alive every single day.
00:05:20
Yeah. Ear Hustle, 100%. the good okay needless to say we are all very grateful my dad had friends on the inside
00:05:27
stay sexy and always make friends in jail question mark love kate be the kind of corrections officer
00:05:34
that people would want to say that's true that's a good kind of life philosophy sure okay if a
00:05:40
how about if a correction if a corrections officer can make friends with prison inmates
00:05:45
then you can make friends with anyone yeah anyone in your dorm right stay positive
00:05:53
I not going to read the subject line of this because it gives it away Hey MFM crew Great pod don ever change change Here my story On January 29th 1988 Eric Robert Rudolph bombed an abortion clinic in Birmingham Alabama
00:06:07
Roughly six months later, my brother and I, ages seven and nine respectively, were on a mission to make a hot summer day at least slightly different than all the other ones that came before it.
00:06:16
Our childhood home in a Birmingham suburb backed up two miles of woods where we spent most of our free ranch childhood.
00:06:24
Amazing. On this particular day, we decided to take a left where we normally went right, and we came upon a makeshift campground.
00:06:31
Oh, my God. A single folding chair, dozens of empty Spam Tins, and even more Michelob Ultra bottles were scattered around the burned-out fire pit.
00:06:40
Naturally, our first instinct was to touch everything. We stomped on the Spam Tins, threw the bottles against trees, and used the folding chair to reenact some of our favorite WWE moves.
00:06:49
Yes. Right? After a week had caused all the mayhem we could and destroyed any chance of evidence collection.
00:06:54
Oh, God. We ran home to tell our mom about our day. I'll never forget the face she made or the tone of her voice as she relayed our discovery to a 911 operator.
00:07:03
As it turns out, police suspected Rudolph hid out in the woods around Birmingham for a while after the bombing.
00:07:09
After the police inspected the place, they told my parents it was probably just a local teenager's hangout spot.
00:07:15
But to this day, my mother swears, quote, only a psychopath would eat that much spam.
00:07:19
Thank you. Eric Rudolph was finally arrested in 2003 in North Carolina, where he'd been hiding out in the woods for years.
00:07:29
During his reign of terror, he bombed Centennial Park during the 1996 Olympics, another abortion clinic and a lesbian bar all in Atlanta.
00:07:38
After his arrest, he explained he was fighting against abortion and, quote, the homosexual agenda.
00:07:44
Fuck you. For real. he's currently serving life without possibility of parole in a super max prison right stay sexy
00:07:52
and if you can't stay out of the forest at least don't disturb a serial bombers hangout
00:07:55
jim p.s my dad made us clean up the scene after the cops left that is such a dad move
00:08:03
that is such a dad move clean it up clean it up sweep up that glass oh my god jim amazing
00:08:09
that was really that's so scary that is that's like the opinion that's exactly what the 80s were
00:08:15
like, you destroyed a fucking hobo camp that you found. Yeah. It could have belonged to a serial killer.
00:08:21
Yeah. Your dad made you clean it up. And you're the one somehow in your brown corduroy pants that's getting in trouble.
00:08:27
That's right. This is Witness in a Murder Trial. Hello, Georgia and Karen. As a longtime true crime fan and more recent listener of your podcast, I have to share with
00:08:35
you that last week I had one of the most thrilling experiences of my life when I was called as
00:08:39
a witness in a murder trial. Oh, my God. I work for the U.S. Forest Service in a dark, mossy, Sasquatch-infested national forest.
00:08:48
In the eight years I've worked for the Forest Service, I've learned that people go to their public lands to do weird things.
00:08:53
Yeah, they do. I've encountered a cache of stolen guns, a Wild West shootout between a real cowboy and some tweakers, a hostage situation, mysteriously exploding four-wheelers, and countless people that I'm pretty sure did something illegal.
00:09:07
I just didn't know quite what. I was called as a witness in a trial involving two young men who were very much under the influence of drugs that decided for whatever reason to steal a minivan belonging to one of their step parents and take a trip into the national forest in the dead of winter 2019 during a week of heavy rain.
00:09:25
Well, I'm not sure exactly the motive. When the two men stopped at a campsite in the forest, one of the men overcame and murdered the other one, then set the minivan ablaze.
00:09:34
Oh, my God. My role as a witness was fairly minor. I was asked to testify when the campsite was or was not occupied that week in order to establish a timeline.
00:09:43
However, it was absolutely thrilling to stand before a judge, swear in, and help put the murderer behind bars.
00:09:49
He was found guilty after a mere four hours of deliberation. Wow. I had to share this with you because it was just so exciting.
00:09:55
I do, however, feel very bad for the family of the victim, who most certainly did not deserve to die that night in the forest.
00:10:01
Sincerely, C.S. Drugs. Drugs are a bummer. Drugs are a bummer. The forest is a bummer.
00:10:09
Just like the idea of being in a minivan high out of your mind. You're just like, I have an idea.
00:10:15
Let's go to a remote part of the forest and then I'll snap and lose my mind on you.
00:10:19
Oh, God. Horrible. Just not cool. No. This is a good one. It just says hometown story.
00:10:25
Hello. A few years ago, I was staying in a hotel in the Czech Republic mountains with my friend Cara.
00:10:29
We were sharing the very last hotel room on the left at the end of the hall and also shared a small entranceway with the room to our left, so we could tell that there was no one checked into that room.
00:10:40
One of the first nights in our hotel room, Cara and I were laying in our separate beds talking with the lights off.
00:10:45
After a while, we both mumbled goodnight and the conversation stopped. I, of course, took out my phone and took advantage of the free Wi-Fi to connect with people back home in the States.
00:10:53
While I was scrolling through my phone, my friend started sobbing quietly and somewhat pathetically in her bed.
00:10:59
I paused listening to hear her crying and felt mostly uncomfortable since she wasn't typically a crier and I wasn't typically a comforter.
00:11:07
I locked my phone and listened, letting another minute pass, hoping she would just stop.
00:11:13
It's so true. Oh, my God. Just stop. I can't help you with this. Please stop. That's terrible.
00:11:20
And trying to figure out just how to respond to this awkward situation since she wasn't.
00:11:24
It's called, are you okay? Can I do anything? Yeah, I guess that's all you really need to do.
00:11:28
You don't have to solve it in the moment. Yeah, you don't have to talk. You just let them talk.
00:11:32
It's just the depth and breadth of nighttime in the room sobbing. But here's a secret.
00:11:39
If someone's sobbing and they know you can hear them, it's because they want you to help them.
00:11:43
Right, which then that triggers the part of me that goes, now I will never help you.
00:11:49
See how I can be? Wait, this isn't a story about me. I was just about to say something from across the room when Kara says are you okay I remember freezing for a second and taking the time to think are you fucking kidding me Oh my God I put my phone down acknowledged with annoyance that I was about to tell Kara there was a little ghost girl sobbing in our room
00:12:07
After another beat, said, I thought that was you. Kara, of course, screamed, shot out of bed, flew straight to the light switch and flicked it on.
00:12:15
There was no one there and the crying had stopped. Kara exclaimed that she felt someone standing next to her bed in the dark and thought it was me.
00:12:22
Oh, my God. We both slept with the lights on that night in my bed, obviously, and made the mistake of looking up why little girls would be haunting the Czech Republic mountains.
00:12:31
All we could find was that those mountains used to be a hiding place for Nazi soldiers who'd fled Hitler's army during World War II.
00:12:38
So make of that what you will. Oh. Stay sexy and don't get a hotel room at the end of the hall, Amber.
00:12:43
That is terrifying. Isn't that crazy? Yes. Holy shit. Hello, beautiful. I'm Amy Erick, founder of Madison Reed, a hair color company I named after my daughter.
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00:13:49
Why is it always chaos when we link up? Cause nobody plans anything bro. Good thing the Rogue's ready like that.
00:13:55
For real. Rain, dirt, whatever. Available all wheel drive. Five modes. We still outside.
00:14:01
And they got some kick too. That turbo? Torque is crazy. The most in its class. It moves moves.
00:14:07
Rogue doesn't mess around. And peep the space. Merch on merch. Gear. Mics. All of it fits.
00:14:13
Load up. We out. 2026 Nissan Rogue. Built for all of it. Auto Pacific Segmentation, 2026 Rogue vs. Latest in-market competitors in the ex-SUV mainstream mid-sites class, excluding electrical vehicles based on manufacturer websites.
00:14:29
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Default terms at MintMobile.com. Okay, this one's called, uh, I'm not telling you.
00:15:03
Okay. Hello, sweet friends. I'm still fairly new to the MFM family. I'm a big scaredy cat and tried to listen for the first time while driving down a dark rural road.
00:15:12
I know. But I've since become obsessed and I'm binging episodes like crazy. In episode 165, during the conversation about the Richmond Hill explosion, which I did live, Georgia referenced the time gas lines exploded outside of Boston.
00:15:26
It actually happened in my sister's town. I was out for dinner when a friend of mine texted me the news article saying, doesn't Michaela live in North Andover?
00:15:33
Always wanted to jump right to the worst case scenario. Hello, anxiety. I immediately called and texted my sister a million times with no response.
00:15:40
Finally, she called me sobbing, saying that she had been evacuated and had to come over.
00:15:44
Whoa. What she later told me, after chugging the wine I'd opened right as she arrived,
00:15:49
is that her apartment complex was right on the gas line and had been evacuated as it could explode at any moment.
00:15:55
Oh, my God. How terrifying. So scary. When she couldn't get to her house because of all the police barricades, my badass sister parked her car and ran.
00:16:02
Ooh. A policeman shouted at her to stop, but she shrieked back, I have to get my cat.
00:16:07
Oh. My sister ran back into the apartment complex, shoved her kitten into a duffel bag.
00:16:12
It was the first thing she could find and then noped right out of there. Poor cat.
00:16:16
Luckily, she was unharmed. Her apartment did not blow up and her cat was left with only a little PTSD from being transported in a shoulder bag and brought to her weirdo aunt's big city apartment.
00:16:25
My sister is the biggest murderino I ever met and she's my best friend. I'm so glad she turned me on to this amazing community.
00:16:31
Stay sexy and maybe keep your pet carrier closer to the door. Alex. I'm just glad she didn't get arrested after coming back out
00:16:39
like there wasn't some kind of I would do it I thought about that if there was like an earthquake or something
00:16:47
there's three fucking cats I have to wrangle that are all freaking out yeah that's going to be tough
00:16:52
you better get a can of herring and just have it nearby or spam psychopaths okay ready for the last one
00:17:01
it's the kind that makes me very happy The subject line is a distant cousin of the greeting card masturbator?
00:17:07
Question mark, question mark, question mark. Yada, yada, yada. Nice stuff. Love you guys.
00:17:11
Okay, so I worked for a few years at a retail store in a shitty mall in downtown Toronto, Ontario.
00:17:17
Amen. Canada. While I was in my undergrad. And boy, did that place have stories.
00:17:22
I'll spare you from all the details. But some highlights include man masturbating into the changing room curtain.
00:17:28
Chainsaw wielding psycho running through the mall and being tackled by security.
00:17:32
parentheses, it made the news. Woman caught on security cameras throwing a five-foot potted palm over her head at her boyfriend.
00:17:41
Man huffing paint in the medical clinic downstairs. Oh, my God. Then climbing up through the ceiling tiles in the bathroom and running around above the clinic to horrified people in the waiting room.
00:17:51
Oh, my God. You know, typical stuff. But there has always been one story that really stuck with me since It was around the time I started near the end of the day when the store got a call and I picked up The man on the other end asked if we had any fur coats This was in June So I said no He asked if I could check in the back So I did
00:18:11
And lo and behold, we had one. He asked me to describe said coat and told me it was for his
00:18:16
mother. Halfway through my description, he cut me off with a loud, oh yeah, keep going. And before
00:18:22
he could say any more, I hung up horrified. He proceeded to call several more times over the next two years.
00:18:27
But thanks to my naive ass taking one for the team and caller ID, no one else had to endure another call.
00:18:34
Now, cut to a month after the store closed. R.I.P. Long Tall Sally. Oh, my God. That's why I started laughing so hard when we
00:18:43
were reading the name Long Tall Sally. How did that not survive? Is it a clothing store for women
00:18:51
over 5'10 or something? It's gotta be. Long Tall Sally? Stephen's looking it up.
00:18:57
Please do. Canadian Long Tall Sally. Oh my God. Oh, Jesus Christ. Long Tall Sally.
00:19:05
I love Canada so much. It is the most... I love that culture. It's hilarious. Oh, Stephen found it.
00:19:14
I guess the online shop is still around. Oh! Do they have fur coats? Describe it to us.
00:19:19
global destination for tall women's style exclusively designed exclusively tall yes
00:19:26
yes long tall sally you're welcome over five nines okay okay so this was also a tall fur coat not just a regular fur coat okay yeah
00:19:40
r.i.p long time's like when i was scrolling through buns a community chat room slash trading
00:19:46
platform b-u-n-z okay canada uh when i came across a thread called the fur coat masturbator
00:19:53
intrigued i started reading and it was the guy according to various retail workers he'd been
00:19:58
calling different retail stores all over ontario for the past 15 years holy shit he always asks
00:20:05
about fur coats and always as a gift for his mother i can only imagine what kind of fucked
00:20:10
up shit happened for this guy to enjoy torturing young female retail workers just trying to do
00:20:14
their damn job and including your mom and including your mom in the story which is part of part of the
00:20:20
yeah it's part of it part of it fur coats what happened to that person what strange childhood
00:20:27
fur coat uh trauma did he go through that that's what he spends the rest of his life doing anyway
00:20:33
love the podcast and all you do heather r heather good one so we have a new one the fur coat
00:20:38
masturbator i mean if only everyone would write in we could just get all of them we could get a
00:20:44
nice catalog like a coffee table book right we need your local weirdo caller slash i mean please
00:20:51
masturbator it's maybe we should do an episode steven where you just edit together all the
00:20:55
um all the perverts we've had on just the pervert the pervert special yeah why is your face so red
00:21:02
i have nothing to do with any of this i'm not interested in fur coats i was 15 years old i
00:21:10
don't even like Swiss cheese. You know that one person made a Swiss Stephen, the like, we know
00:21:18
we have the cocaine barrier, like that person made one of me. Oh, that's actionable.
00:21:24
I do think it is. You can't call Stephen the pervert. I didn't. No, no, no, not you.
00:21:29
You said it to me. I didn't do it. Stephen did give us these little Valentine's Day
00:21:34
cards. Is he the greeting card? Don't make me say it. Don't make me accuse him on
00:21:39
Yeah. National podcasting. National. It's actionable. Was that it? I think that was it. That was a quick one,
00:21:44
it felt like. It really did. Well, those were so good. Each one. Each one a tale in itself. Italian.
00:21:51
Italian finger kiss to the sky. God bless you all. Send your weird stories to myfavoritemurder
00:21:57
at gmail or you can go to myfavoritemurder.com and there's a what is it called? Link?
00:22:02
No, it's a. There's an icon. Submission form. There's a clickable icon. Submission form.
00:22:06
Dot biz. That'll always be funny to me. I don't know why. No, I love it. Stay sexy.
00:22:13
And don't get murdered. Goodbye. Elvis, you want a cookie? Bro, from the show last night to this drive, why is it never chill?
00:22:22
Because this is our life. Backstage, on the road, it's loud, messy, real. And that's the best part.
00:22:29
Whole crew, no plan, just moving. Good thing Nissan builds for that kind of chaos.
00:22:33
Not just test tracks, real life scenes. Late nights, road trips, all of it. That's why it holds up. Nissan was ranked number one in initial quality among mainstream brands by J.D. Power.
00:22:45
Yeah, you can tell. 2026 Nissan Rogue built for what really happens. For J.D. Power 2025 U.S. Initial Quality Study Award information, visit jdpower.com slash awards.
00:22:57
Awards based on 2025 model year, newer models may be shown. Hey everyone, it's Cal Penn.
00:23:03
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