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Own the dream. My favorite heart What's up, Portland? Yay! Ooh, we love it here.
00:02:21
Hello. Hi. Wow. This is our second night here, and it just feels like the first.
00:02:32
It's real cool. It feels like the first. Thank you. No, stop it. Stop it. I like how you won't commit to it by singing the words.
00:02:45
Right. That would be for nerds. Instead, I make a joke of it. but I still get to do it anyway.
00:02:54
This is exciting, right? This is fun. Can I just talk about a couple things? Waving has been, if you can tell already,
00:03:07
look at how many rings Georgia has on, first of all. And I was waving and some of them don't fit
00:03:13
and I was like, don't throw a lot of money out to the audience. look at that do you want to explain what these are okay so i have this friend who lives here
00:03:22
important named carrie selling better hi angel hey hi carrie oh they put her all the way in the
00:03:27
back sorry steven sorry she has a jewelry like antique jewelry that she sells under
00:03:37
cassidy vintage jewelry and dot net dot gov and last night we were all drinking at a bar and she
00:03:45
She's like, do you want to wear my jewelry tomorrow? And I'm like, yes, and you're going to be regretting this tomorrow.
00:03:50
Because whenever I hang out with her, I take all her jewelry off and put it on me in a playhouse.
00:03:55
So there's like a ring box that's all open, and George is in it like a fucking raccoon in a garbage can.
00:04:01
She's like, both hands and part of her head were in this thing. And I'm thinking, like, I picked one.
00:04:09
I'm like, this is neat and interesting. Literally, she's wearing one. just i don't need to floss georgia on the other hand i need to fucking floss just like hey are you
00:04:21
ready to go hilarious it's just like i feel like it's a dream come true uh carrie i should warn you
00:04:27
i've already lost my own wedding band so while i was going it's with a hundred dollars from jc
00:04:33
penny it's fine uh not careful careful oh yeah they're on loan we're just having fun i just feel
00:04:40
We're having fun with it in the schnitz. We're finally at the schnitz, you guys.
00:04:46
Can you believe it? We graduated from that McMinimans bullshit, and now we're at the schnitz.
00:04:56
Can you believe I said that? Can you believe I said that in the state of Oregon?
00:05:01
Karen is starting a turf war. I'm starting a turf war. Meet me outside. I'll fucking fight you off.
00:05:10
I love it. I love it. There's nothing I love more. Tell them about the bling on your boobs.
00:05:17
Oh, yeah. This is, thank you, it's from 1802. These are from Janet Jackson's last tour.
00:05:27
No, they gave me, this happened right before we left. They called me from, I'm on a show that's not on anymore called Talk Show, the game show,
00:05:36
and they, thank you up in the balcony. No, no, it's too late. And they called and said, hey, do you want all of your wardrobe from this show?
00:05:44
And I was like, okay. And then they truly dropped off 25 pairs of shoes that I will never wear.
00:05:52
And, you know, like 50 shirt. It was crazy It was just a haul And so I been wearing clogs with dresses for almost all the tours we ever done Mostly to piss my sister off because she gets really mad when she sees those dance girls kicked out with a dress
00:06:11
For some reason. I don't know if she was hurt deeply by a nurse or what happened to her.
00:06:17
She gets mad. It's hard sitting up here for 10 minutes before we sit down. I know, it's really hard.
00:06:23
It hurts. It's difficult. Are you going to wear these? Are you going to go back to clogs?
00:06:27
What do you think? I'm going to wear these for the rest of my life. I'm not day, night, beach, mountain.
00:06:33
92-year-old Karen's just like, I can't. Fuck, I said it as a joke, and now I have to do it.
00:06:38
It was recorded. Also, really quick, my dress has pockets. Just so you know. It's important.
00:06:44
It's important. Big ones. Oh. And last night at the meet and greet. There were these two girls sitting right around where you guys are last night.
00:06:55
You might feel their spirit. They had, I kind of vaguely saw that they had, what were they called?
00:07:03
Pentagrams. Pentagrams on their shirt. Big pink shirts with brown pentagrams. And I was like, ignore those two.
00:07:09
Can't get involved with Satanists right now. But when they came in through the fucking meet and greet, we realized that the pentagrams were raisins.
00:07:21
Yeah. and by the time they got to us, like, I'd say a good nine raisins had fallen off of each,
00:07:30
so they were, like, quickly on their way to becoming stars with arches nearby. Like, the pentagram theme was falling away quickly.
00:07:38
But then, literally, I just had one in my pocket. I must have taken it off our shirt, like, here's my prize for the evening.
00:07:45
I was like, what's that? That could be something bad. It is. It's a raisin. the worst thing there is.
00:07:53
Here, we'll put that there for the hometown person. Oh, the hometown gets it. That's right.
00:07:57
That's your prize. Why did I touch it? Tell a good story. I just feel gross now.
00:08:03
Who likes old grapes? Who likes sad grapes, they're called. So I told you this story last night
00:08:11
about how when Vince and I were on the plane yesterday coming here without Karen.
00:08:17
I missed my plane. I forgot about that until just now. Here's the thing. When you live right next to an airport, you're like, I don't have to be there at the same time as normal people.
00:08:29
I'm different than normal people. I'm the exception to the rule. The rule is you don't have to leave the normal time as normal people.
00:08:38
You have to get there. You have to get there in time to make your planes. Turns out, I guess, that's the rule at airports.
00:08:45
I love the idea of, like, I don't have to get there. You just hop the fence because it's your backyard.
00:08:49
You just go, I just have to hop the fence. Just run across the tarmac. Yeah. It's me.
00:08:52
It's me. Oh, it's the neighbor. It's a neighbor. Yeah. Later on. It's fine. Does she need sugar or is she getting on the.
00:08:56
Here's the thing about fucking Alaska Airlines. Yeah. Those lunatic Christians. When I walked up and I honestly think I was like three minutes late, Max.
00:09:07
When I walked up, I was like, put my ID down and I was like flying to Portland and they're
00:09:13
like, only 1120. And then I was like, yeah, whatever it was. It was like, yeah, it was the ninth.
00:09:20
30. That might have been the problem. I do have a problem with a clock. I think we actually landed
00:09:28
at 1120. Okay. Did you get the wrong? No. Got it. No. Okay. I'm just fucking totally insane.
00:09:36
So when I tried to check in, the lady's like, for the nine fucking 30, whatever it is. And I was like,
00:09:43
yeah, of course. And then she's like, the door's closed. But the way she said it was like, either
00:09:49
she was auditioning for a soap opera or like I ruined her birthday party. I was just like, hold on. I'm the one in peril
00:09:57
here, right? Why are you mad at me? Fucking blue vested bitch. I didn't say that.
00:10:03
I didn't say it. Maybe she would have let you on. She's like, whoa. Whoa, there's an alpha
00:10:09
in the room. Yeah. We're gonna need her. We're gonna need her on the plane for safety.
00:10:14
Yep, when the shit kicks off. I want this shit. We want that crazy cunt on that plane.
00:10:19
Nope. You know what actually happened? Yeah, the balcony likes the word cunt. Here's what...
00:10:27
Lights up. People are just falling off the balcony. Here's what happened, though.
00:10:39
So Vince, I text Vince, Georgia's husband, our tour manager, the greatest. My proxy, Karen's husband, too.
00:10:46
He's my proxy. and I'm like, so I missed the plane. They're sitting on the plane.
00:10:56
I missed the plane. And by the way, she could have fucking made it. If that chick had opened the door,
00:11:00
whatever, I don't know, is there a magic door behind where you check in that they let you in?
00:11:04
Karen could have made it. I probably could have. Someone lied to you. But I text him,
00:11:08
I'm like, I missed the plane. He's like, I'm getting you on the 11 o'clock, whatever.
00:11:12
That was like the makeup plane. But guess what it was on? This is the way, he's teaching me to never miss my plane again fucking southwest have you lately have you lately
00:11:25
flown on that fucking cattle truck of a horror show you the lady sitting next to me had her leg over my thigh it was just like let's just make the best
00:11:38
of this. It was so awful. So awful on that. It's like they open the door to run so you can go to the plane
00:11:48
because in Burbank you have to walk across the trameck and they just yell, run! Every single person you've ever been
00:11:54
stuck behind on the fucking freeway just starts Oh I hate everyone Just So once we take off vince gets your flight we take off i am a i am a very ugly sleeper i sleep oh yeah with my fucking head
00:12:09
i have fucked up jaw so my mouth i sleep like this like wide fucking almost like a snake jaw
00:12:17
unhinged oh it's pretty actually you could eat a large egg if you were sleeping uh-huh cool
00:12:23
absolutely um and the fucking asshole in front of me has is the listen look around on a plane next
00:12:30
time listen and look around and listen and look are you the only person with your fucking window
00:12:35
open you're an asshole everyone hates you everyone hates you she means the shade
00:12:41
roll that fucking window roll it up come on roll it up stopping an asshole and killing everyone
00:12:51
So then what happens? I have my sunglasses on because I'm fucking too cool and that guy won't shut his fucking window.
00:12:58
Right. I have my hood. It's a combination of those two things. My hood on. Well, you know what?
00:13:02
And then Vince takes a photo of me. Oh, do we get to see it? Yeah, last night I forgot.
00:13:07
But then, okay, let me just show you. Okay. All right. Oh. Oh. Oh. I guess we're not exaggerating.
00:13:17
Oh, I see. kind of a beautiful photo right it looks like you're doing an impression of that lindsey
00:13:25
lohan paparazzi photo it does i'm not even drunk it's like 9 a.m i haven't had a drink i'm not i'm
00:13:34
not even drunk okay so here's what happened next pattington on her little plane look at her
00:13:41
the coolest pattington ever your teeth look pretty great though no your teeth are great when i wake up
00:13:47
Vince is like giggling and he shows me the photo and I must love him so fucking much
00:13:53
because normally this is off limits don't take a photo of me when I'm sleeping because I look like that
00:13:56
but I think it's funny but then he shows it to me and he has his earbuds in because he's listening to something
00:14:01
so you know how you yell shit when you think and you're on a plane? But you think you're speaking
00:14:06
like a respectful waiter? Right. He points it at me and he goes he yells this on a plane
00:14:12
Uniformer! Yeah. He's correct, but he just yelled Unabomber on a plane. He's not wrong.
00:14:22
He's not wrong. He's not wrong. How good is that? If the Unabomber was like, I love Paddington Bear.
00:14:36
And marmalade sandwiches. I don't want to anymore. And then I, yeah. By the way, welcome to, this is my favorite murder podcast, by the way.
00:14:45
just just in case okay show no that's karen kail gareth this is georgia hardstar thank you
00:14:51
thank you steven's not here oh right he literally hasn't been like a year you guys but he's taking
00:15:01
care of my cats at home and i'm always talking about like photos he sends so afraid you're gonna
00:15:05
throw that raisin away don't touch it stop touching it i'm gonna put it on my ring
00:15:11
Oh my god, why hasn't anyone come out with a line of raisin jewelry? Instead of carrots, how many carrots is your ring?
00:15:19
It's actually just one raisin. It's just the raisin. We decided to go with one raisin.
00:15:25
But he sends me photos of the cats and videos, and I'm always... My hair just came off of me and flew right onto you.
00:15:31
It was on me? Yeah. Leave it, it's good luck. He sent me a photo this morning as I was...
00:15:39
This morning is noon as I woke up and changed my murder last minute. And I was like, send that to Vince because I need to put it up on the screen tonight.
00:15:48
Because I need to show you guys. It's the best. Get you a fucking cat sitter who does shit like this.
00:15:54
Karen hasn't seen this. This is great. What the fuck? What the fuck is he doing?
00:16:01
I'm afraid I'm going to Kelsey Grammer and fall off this stage. Here. here lean back thank you oh yeah yeah yeah
00:16:11
look at mimi fucking mad dogging him mimi's like are you send this to my mom send this to my mom
00:16:20
let her know how i feel let her know what's going on please he's just it's like every day is a new
00:16:28
journey for steven every moment he's not broken yet no well we're gonna fix that i think he no no
00:16:36
he might be completely Teflon. He's like Kevlar. His teeth look good too. Yeah, you know, he looks good.
00:16:42
He does look good. I mean, how could you not be like, I'm fine, the cats are fine.
00:16:49
Mimi's not fine. Look at that face. Mimi is traumatized. He's doing something before or after that picture.
00:16:57
Yeah, what's in his hand that we can't see? Yes. Oh. What if he was like the most fucking psychopathic?
00:17:04
Like he's Mr. Sweet Steven. and then like he's taking these pictures and showing you like i just poked your cat with a
00:17:11
needle and then he's like no way what go with me this is a fun improv it's funny what if somebody
00:17:16
was secretly torturing your animals no no no just my thing what if he just didn't have pants on in
00:17:21
that photo what if he's naked from the waist down in this photo that's gotta be it now mimi knows
00:17:29
mimi has a very small uh cell phone in her hand she's like touching that emergency number mimi's
00:17:35
poking him. What does Mimi's poking him with a needle? Ooh. And he's like, I don't care. I love cats.
00:17:41
I don't care what they do to me. Tell my mom everything's fine. Tell her. Tell her you like it.
00:17:51
So that's Steven. And what else is there Should we How your nails Should we sit down I just painted them two minutes I put this ring on and then what I had on every fingernail before
00:18:06
was just the very last vestiges of this exact fingernail polish from two weekends ago.
00:18:13
When you painted them backstage in... Durham, North Carolina? That's right. So, right? Durham's in the house.
00:18:20
So I put this ring on, and I'm like, well, that would be gross if I then had this as, like, you know, Lady Musgrove's fucking engagement ring or whatever.
00:18:32
I mean, the history of these. Someone insane must have worn these. Like. They're haunted as fuck.
00:18:39
They're haunted. There's no way they're not. But look how fancy I look. Okay, let's sit down, shall we?
00:18:45
Yeah, let's do it. Let's sit down. Oh. Just a fun fact. We love trivia here. You know how we love trivia.
00:18:56
These chairs, not only do they circle all the way around. Full rotation. Mine didn't last night, and I got real angry,
00:19:03
and so someone obviously got the note. Yeah. Your side clears, as does mine. Okay, great.
00:19:09
We can sit down. Thank God. These were flown in by special request from Anderson Cooper.
00:19:17
And Andy Cohen. So you don't have to. Here's how they do it. They go, they do this exact same thing at places like this.
00:19:26
And they order a set that must be very similar to this. Although I bet you they go with a different kind of rug.
00:19:33
But then they leave the chairs behind because it's too expensive to ship them wherever they're going next.
00:19:39
So they just buy new chairs in every city. And we keep following them and then getting these sweet ass chairs where we're just like,
00:19:48
Like, you don't normally get an armrest. A cushion alone is a big deal, much less a tasteful heather gray.
00:19:55
That's right. I mean, everything about it is fucking... Swivels even. There you go.
00:20:07
I don't know what that was. I don't either. Here, take your fucking disgusting...
00:20:09
Give me my fucking raisin. Raisin. Out of here. Mine. Your nasty old... I'll take my nasty tissue and you take your nasty...
00:20:16
What if I got them mixed up on accident? Oh my God. You shoved that raisin right at my nose.
00:20:20
Can you imagine? How'd I get taken to the hospital from here? Just go like this.
00:20:25
I'm going to feature it. Disgusting. It's gorgeous. What have we become? Oh, this is a true crime comedy podcast.
00:20:37
For all you people who have never participated before, but somehow someone tricked you into coming tonight.
00:20:42
Welcome. Bought you a nice dinner. Told you it wouldn't be that long. It's basically a murder mystery theater.
00:20:51
Someone said that. Someone was in the meet and greet line and they were like, we told her it was a murder mystery theater.
00:20:59
She had never heard it. So she's listening to us tell the fucking most fucked up stories of all time,
00:21:04
thinking that we're all as a group going to solve it at the end. Or she's going to get one tap on the shoulder and she has to pretend.
00:21:12
She's like, that theater class I took in community college 20 years ago is finally going to pay off.
00:21:18
No, I'm the victim. But no. Nope, sorry, Aunt Bailey. But we do like to tell people this
00:21:24
if you've never listened to the podcast or you're new or, you know, you just have season tickets to the schnitz.
00:21:30
Listen. You're a drag along. Especially you. This is important. We talk about true crime,
00:21:36
which of course are often murders, mayhem, disasters, all kinds of things that are very difficult to talk about.
00:21:44
But then we also do it comedically. and so sometimes people find that combination
00:21:48
a little bit complex, maybe a tiny bit difficult They don't know yet that they can trust us
00:21:55
that you're in good hands that we're conscientious, caring people and sometimes they don't like it, they're offended by that
00:22:03
They don't like the word cunt or what have you, a number of things that can go on here
00:22:10
So we just want to say to those people, if you don't like it, please get the fuck out
00:22:14
as soon as possible why is it always chaos when we link up because nobody plans anything bro good thing the rogue's
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based on manufacturer websites hey everyone it's cal pen host of ear say the audible and
00:23:04
iHeart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I'm sitting down with Divergent author Veronica
00:23:09
Roth to talk about her sprawling new novel, Seek the Traitor's Son. It's a sci-fi fantasy epic
00:23:15
about two protagonists on opposite sides of a war and a prophecy neither of them wanted.
00:23:20
My first book was Divergent. And when that came out, like, because it was so popular,
00:23:25
I think it attracted like mostly positivity, but the negativity I sucked in like a sponge.
00:23:30
And I think it was like critiques of things I liked when I was like, you know, I was 23 and I wrote this book and it had all my like dorky little cheesy
00:23:40
or maybe unrealistic loves in it. And I started to feel a lot of shame about those things.
00:23:46
And so for the rest of my career, I steered away from those little things that like,
00:23:52
make you feel pleasure when you read. But I also was like saying no to these parts of myself.
00:24:00
that I then was like, screw it. So that's this book. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club
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00:24:43
All right. This is, I'm going to do, you, Portland, my God, it's hard to come here because you guys have so many good murders, which means, which means we've done a lot of them.
00:24:55
So we have to dig, but that's fun too. So then sometimes you have these ones that everyone grew up knowing about
00:25:02
who is from Portland and around here, and then people like us who aren't had never heard of them,
00:25:07
and then you're like, holy shit. Anyways, this is one of them. What if you were doing a third one?
00:25:14
I'm not doing that. Then there's. No, I'm doing the Peyton Allen murders. Nobody? You guys didn't grow up?
00:25:22
No. It's definitely too late for that. It's very unnatural to clap after a three-second hold.
00:25:30
Okay, so I got a lot of information. There is one really great article from the Register Guard
00:25:35
called Hidden History and Mystery by Randy Bjorgstad, who fucking, they moved into this house, they tear down a wall,
00:25:43
they find a bunch of papers in this wall, like clippings and weird drawings and shit,
00:25:47
and one of them was a clipping of this murder that took place in 1960, and there's some mystery around it,
00:25:54
and the guy's like, what the fuck? Yes. So he fucking tracks them down and finds out that it was a kid's room
00:26:00
and like the little brother. It was a child murderer? No. It was like 12 years old
00:26:05
and just fascinated with, his brother was like, he's dead now, his brother was like,
00:26:09
he was fascinated with murders and he got really into hypnosis and there was like a notepad
00:26:13
with all this hypnosis shit in it and like it was just bananas. He was a little murderino
00:26:17
just waiting for his time. Hiding shit in the walls. Pretty great. Okay. So in 1960, Larry Payton of Portland and Beverly Allen of Port Townsend, Washington.
00:26:32
You said Washington like you've never heard that word before. Washington. Washington is how you say it?
00:26:39
Okay. Washington. They're 19-year-old sweethearts and students. He's at Portland State College and she's at Washington State College.
00:26:51
Maybe the fighting. Mulberries. Right. And the wrestling chicken. Men. Sometimes we can just pick men, right?
00:27:05
That's true. Does anyone have a what do you call it? Mascot that's just a man? That fighting man?
00:27:14
The fighting dude. You know the guy that fights with everybody? He's out there fighting.
00:27:19
The fighting drunk? Just a drunk guy? Oh, that's Notre Dame. okay so they had met and during the summer of 1960 they were both students and had summer
00:27:31
jobs at crater lake lodge which and had fallen in love what a lake what a lodge the lake and the lodge oh they go so well together that's right
00:27:44
um and crater lake is where that i had done a murder there before too yes and i did the
00:27:50
mysteries of crater lake that's right right we know we're fucking experts listen we know everything
00:27:55
we know we're walking wikipedia which means incorrect and too many commas filled with our heads are filled with them so uh thanksgiving weekend they in 1960 they had both
00:28:10
spent the weekend with their families and then so on the 26th they met up to smooch like let's be
00:28:17
honest they're 19 they're like we're gonna go into town no they're like we're going to neck
00:28:22
and heavy pet heavy pet and neck um it was 1960 that's what your parents did okay
00:28:31
so the couple go out for a drive and they end up as fucking couples do in horror movies and
00:28:38
the 1960s on a dirt road on a dark lover's lane oh yep it's one of these stories necking maybe
00:28:45
Maybe they were talking. I don't know. They weren't talking on the Lover's Lane.
00:28:49
So anyway, do you like maps or horticulture? I do. Cool, cool. Cool. Sorry, I started the scene over here, but I should have done it with you.
00:29:01
No, now it's creepy. That wasn't cool at all. Now there's three people in the car on Lover's Lane.
00:29:06
And I'm in the middle. Lucky Pierre. And they're in Forest Park in Portland Hills, which is like...
00:29:14
It's so weird because in L.A. I hear like, oh, they're on the Portland Hills and they're in like a beautiful, you know, outdoorsy area.
00:29:22
So I'm like, they must be hours and hours from town because in L.A. there's nothing beautiful there.
00:29:28
Ever. It's a sad dad. It is the saddest dad in the whole parking lot. That's all it is.
00:29:36
But it's actually just like you can see it from here. It's like a 10 minute drive and then you're in the most beautiful fucking place in the world.
00:29:41
It's great. Oh, the dads are stoked as fuck up there. Dads everywhere. Dads loving life.
00:29:48
They park in his 1949 Ford and start necking. Here's a photo of them. Of them necking I know He looks like suddenly Seymour He is
00:30:06
And then look at how gorgeous she is. They're just like, yeah, it's like out of a fucking movie.
00:30:12
Larry Payton and Beverly Allen. Okay. So. The next cut to the next evening. Yeah.
00:30:22
To. Multnomah. Multnomah. Multnomah. County Sheriff's Deputies. They're trolling the Forest Park
00:30:34
in remote areas looking for stolen cars when they happen upon Larry Payton's car the next evening at
00:30:40
9.32 p.m. That's got to be creepy, right? Anybody in that car? Larry Payton is found dead in the car.
00:30:48
He's discovered in the front seat of his car he had 23 stab wounds. Fuck. I know.
00:30:55
And a severe blow to the head. There's blood inside and outside of the car. He had obviously fought for his life.
00:31:01
There's a bullet hole found on the passenger side of the front window. All the bullets are gone, though.
00:31:07
There's a man's sock on the road nearby and also 18 inches of green nylon cord lying behind the car.
00:31:14
And finally, there's a small pen knife that had been placed on the hood of the car.
00:31:18
But what's missing is Beverly Allen. But part of her blouse is discovered in the car,
00:31:26
and her handbag, which had money, was on the floor, not taken. Her jacket is there as well, spattered with blood on the front seat,
00:31:33
and her glasses are by the car smashed as well. Yeah. News of the crime fucking grips you guys,
00:31:42
and also all over the fucking country, people are, you know, it's a lover's lane sling.
00:31:47
It's crazy. And it's like everything you've ever heard by a fucking campfire. Right.
00:31:52
Like it's so it's scary. Just a car on a lover's lane is scary by itself. Totally.
00:31:57
And it's 1960. So everyone's like, this doesn't happen. You know? So boop, boop, boop, boop.
00:32:04
Okay. People comb officers and volunteers comb the hills looking for Beverly. And one weekend, 600 people show up, including a contingent.
00:32:14
I obviously copied and pasted that. from Crown Zellerbach Paper Company, where her father works.
00:32:24
Oh my God. The heiress to the Crown Zellerbach paper fortune is here tonight. What's up, Ashley?
00:32:31
She's like, I'm going to buy all those jewelry. She's like, I will have every ring you're wearing.
00:32:35
Ashley Zellerbach, what's up? Someone cheered for a paper company. This town rules so hard.
00:32:47
Love paper. Beverly's dad worked there, so everyone came out to look for her as well,
00:32:53
and they couldn't find her. People kept reporting seeing someone who looked like her,
00:32:57
but of course it turned out to be cases of misidentification. Because sadly, 43 days after they found Larry,
00:33:05
on Monday, January 9th, 1961, Beverly's body was discovered by highway workers down a slope off Highway 26,
00:33:14
40 miles west of Portland in the town of Timber. So there's a student named Phil Stanford. He was a private investigator and a former columnist for the Portland Tribune in Oregonian. He wrote a book about this case called the Peyton Allen Files. He says that the authorities, of course, ruined the crime scene. Quote, they didn't secure it and people were walking all over the place, reporters and photographers and cops leaving footprints and dropping cigarette butts.
00:33:41
I mean, I feel like that's the 1960s, essentially. There's people walking on anything and putting cigarette butts everywhere.
00:33:47
I also think that that with crime scenes happened up until like 1997. It's very recent that people are like, you know what?
00:33:55
We're not going to have the reporters come in first. We're going to get some scientists in here first before reporters and photographers.
00:34:01
Have you seen this newfangled invention called gloves? Yeah, I don't trust them.
00:34:07
I don't trust them. It turns out they're not just for blowing up and hitting at each other.
00:34:13
You put them on before you touch a crime scene. No, I'm Catholic. I can't do that.
00:34:19
Sorry. Not doing it. Okay. Okay. Fine. Detectives chased many leads. They questioned a sailor who went missing from Tongue Point Naval Station.
00:34:34
What did you look at me like that for? Because it's named Tongue Point. Naval station.
00:34:39
And we have one recruit from there. Thank you so much for your service. Thank you for your service.
00:34:44
We do appreciate it. That's near Astoria. He had gone. There's one guy from there.
00:34:51
Every city. He had gone AWOL the day after the murders. And it turns out they just determined that Beverly had probably died right around the time she was kidnapped.
00:35:04
So she wasn't held anywhere. So it turns out two weeks after he had gone AWOL, on January 23, 1961,
00:35:11
the day two weeks after Payton's body was discovered, this sailor named Wayne Budd, he, dude, okay, you guys ready for this?
00:35:18
He was discovered 20 miles east of Astoria along Highway 30, and according to the story in the Oregonian, his body was found, quote,
00:35:26
blown to bits by a charge reported as TNT. Either he blew himself up or someone else blew him up,
00:35:34
but they thought that he might be the killer. I'm sorry, Wile E. Coyote was in the area?
00:35:39
That's crazy. Did they ever find out what happened? No, but we'll talk about him in a minute.
00:35:48
Oh, that's not just a random fact. I mean, it is. There might be more I don know I see I sorry You trying to lay out possibilities Am I Am I or did I just finish this 20 minutes ago
00:36:06
Another suspect was a local who was picked up a week or so after the murders. He was a paroled convict who had recently come to Portland.
00:36:16
He had a bullet wound in his arm, a recent one. I remember there was like a bullet, but there was no, a hole, but there was no bullet.
00:36:25
He said he got it while target shooting. You know, when you're like, I'm going to get the target behind me.
00:36:29
And you're like, shoot behind you. Hey, you're next. Uh-oh. Oh, shit. Yeah. Sure, dude.
00:36:37
But before, please bring him in before they could question him any further. In all the articles, it says that he escaped.
00:36:42
But then in a couple, I could find, like a couple old ones I found. It says a man showed up who said he was the detainee's parole officer and someone just let him go.
00:36:50
So he might have escaped by outwitting the cops, but they're just like, just say he escaped.
00:36:55
At the end of the day. And then he took the fuck off, which is what innocent people do.
00:37:00
Yes. You just have to leave sometimes. Yes. More on him later. Okay. Despite the fervor of the community wanting this crime solved, the case goes cold for
00:37:11
eight years. And that is until August 1968, when three men are charged for the murders.
00:37:19
brothers edward and carl jorgensen they're 36 and 28 and their friend robert brahm uh they all get
00:37:27
charged because a witness had come forward a woman named nicky essex and she's like look look here's
00:37:34
what happened i i started going to therapy and recovered this crazy fucking memory oh it's so
00:37:41
bananas my her memory had been wiped away by the trauma of the incident she said and restored years
00:37:46
later only after extensive therapy, including hypnosis and truth serum. Sodium pentothal, right?
00:37:53
Yeah. No, wait. Is that? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, but that's cyanide. No, it's not.
00:37:58
No. Oh, I remembered after taking cyanide. But also, how bad is your therapist if you have to use truth serum?
00:38:06
She had then remembered and then testified for the prosecution at the trial that she
00:38:11
had been with the Jorgensen brothers. and she said that they had she had once had a quote
00:38:17
and this was in the papers confidential relationship that's what I'm fucking calling it
00:38:22
I see a lot of manila folders and like raincoats and shit I think that's 1986 terms where they were boning
00:38:29
yeah probably a confidential relationship with Edward off the record boning and that the night
00:38:38
she was with Edward and Brom the night of the murders and that she had seen them fighting
00:38:42
with Larry Payton after he nearly forced, like they had been drag racing, and supposedly Larry with Beverly in the car
00:38:50
had almost driven them off the road. And so she says that basically they killed them because of that.
00:38:58
And obviously she's probably full of shit, right? But one thing... We're all getting that feeling.
00:39:05
Yeah, we're all on that. That's not a surprise. Everyone thinks she's full of shit.
00:39:08
Getting stabbed 23 times usually doesn't come into play when you're doing a chicken thing with cars?
00:39:13
Yeah, usually. We don't know. Who can judge? I mean, but one thing she did say that struck me
00:39:19
that wasn't in a lot of the articles was that she said to them that they had put socks on their hands
00:39:24
like mittens to wipe away the fingerprints. And remember, there was a sock lying near the car
00:39:27
that didn't make much sense. I do remember. But that could have just been, that could have been fed to her by the police.
00:39:34
So who knows if that's true. The jury, though, finds Ed Jorgensen guilty and he receives life sentence plus 25 years.
00:39:42
And then several months later at his own trial, his brother, or several months later, his brother,
00:39:47
they all get separate trials, Carl, but the brother's acquitted of the murders because his attorney successfully argues
00:39:54
that the young woman had been, quote, brainwashed. So he kind of got a good attorney, it sounds like.
00:39:58
Just the one guy? The younger brother. The older brother gets 25, life plus 25. Younger brother's acquitted.
00:40:05
Then in early 1970, the friend, Brom, who's the last to be tried, is also convicted and sentenced to life for 25 years, and the case is officially closed.
00:40:15
And that's the end. No, it's not. I'm just kidding. This is all just typey words.
00:40:20
This is my food diary. It's really long. Okay, there we are. Then, inexplicably, in 1973, so that was 1970, 68 and 70, five years after being convicted,
00:40:38
Jorgensen is paroled from prison. Weird, right? Yeah. Brom is released in 1977, that's just seven years, after he had been in the work release
00:40:46
program in Portland for a year. They released him. The chairman of the parole board at the time said that prison officials considered Brom
00:40:54
to be the best inmate they had ever had. Aww. he was so polite he was so fun at dinner
00:41:03
he was on time he just was good with like banter and conversation he just made he relaxed other prisoners
00:41:09
never threatened anyone with a homemade shiv no that's all it took it just wasn't what he was about
00:41:15
great at basketball great at concrete not killing people sports concrete sports?
00:41:22
I don't know what's that? LeBron, come explain to us what concrete sports is What I was talking about is kind of like a playground.
00:41:30
Oh. The different things you would do. Like for your hour outdoors. I don't know if I ate a lot of protein tonight before the show.
00:41:37
It's really what just hit me. Sorry about that. You know what? You did have concrete sports.
00:41:46
Okay, fine. Let's share it. Fine. Let's split these hamsy twosies with it. I don't know if I did either.
00:41:53
Okay. But all the men So all those dudes are like great and fucking split Oregon because that what you do Yes They like fuck this place All right But the guy got life plus 25 and he was out in seven years
00:42:06
Mm-hmm, and the other guy. They're both out at this point. Okay, okay. And they fucking later it out of town.
00:42:11
Great. But, of course, there's a lot of doubts that still linger that these guys were even guilty at all, obviously.
00:42:20
And the Oregon Parole Board, okay. Because at the time, especially, even then, especially, the parole board were really fucking, like, their sentencing was strict, and they stuck to it.
00:42:35
So it was really weird to everyone that they let them out, and it settled to a lot of people that even they knew that they didn't do it.
00:42:41
So they let them go. And in Phil Stanford's book about the case, The Peyton Allen Files, he argues that the convictions were an injustice and points to a more likely suspect in the case.
00:42:50
So now we're going to name our favorite theories. Okay. Okay, remember that dude?
00:42:55
That's right. Remember that dude with the bullet hole who shot backwards? I'll never forget him.
00:42:59
In his arm. He was picked up early after the murders. He was also seen hanging around the crime scene when they were photographing it and shit, like a looky-loo.
00:43:10
Those kinds of people. Oh, yeah. Turns out that he was around there, too, and Anne had a bullet hole in his arm.
00:43:16
And no one noticed, because they were like, I want to scan the crowd, but I have to smoke and throw it down in this crucial area.
00:43:22
15 times. Put it out in the blood. Yeah. Well, he split town after, remember he was like,
00:43:31
he escaped before they could question him and they were like, that's weird. Anyways, let's look into
00:43:37
someone else. Yeah. Guess what his name is? Jerry? No. Can I guess again? Yeah. Dan. No.
00:43:47
Edward Wayne Edwards. Oh, we know him oh wait i think i have some other photos let's get let's catch up real quick oh here's a photo
00:43:55
of the car i we're directly underneath this screen i can't see it i have to back it up great right
00:44:01
okay and then okay so those are the three guys who went to my god i should have caught up i should
00:44:06
write picture on my notes steven yes seriously they look like the cast of arrow or something
00:44:12
what the fuck is this these are some hot pieces what's happening what next week on the oc
00:44:20
yeah god guys i know let's stay here for a minute i mean imagine if they had like just a nice acoustic trio oh my god traveling jorgensen
00:44:37
oh that'd be sweet it's a damn shame i bet one plays a steel guitar i love a steel guitar
00:44:47
that was good thank you that was a good i've been practicing boop boop boop okay so then we get to sorry to make you stand up again it's all right edward
00:44:58
wait this fucking guy remember this dude did we ever post the you did him at a live show right
00:45:04
did we ever post that i don't know i know uh um boop boop boop wait you got it okay edward wait
00:45:14
Okay, let's talk about him. So at the time of the Peyton Allen murders, Edwards was on parole out of Deer Lodge Prison in Montana.
00:45:22
Holy shit. Really? Are you being sarcastic? They meant it. Well, he was living in Portland on probation.
00:45:32
And in early 2009, the Wisconsin State Police, they had a cold case from 1980. someone had followed two young lovers
00:45:41
as they walked home from a wedding reception and stabbed the man to death and raped and strangled his fiance.
00:45:47
The killer's DNA was taken and preserved and when the technology caught up in 2009
00:45:52
the DNA was tested and it came back to match Edwards who at that time was just like a career criminal
00:45:59
but I don't think any murders had been pinned on him. So they get him, they have his DNA,
00:46:04
they arrest him, he's this old man and in a wheelchair on oxygen. He's charged with two counts of murder.
00:46:13
In 2010, he also confesses that he was the murderer of two young lovers in Doyleston, Ohio in 1977.
00:46:21
Again, execution style, with a shotgun blast to the back of the neck. One of those people who suspects Edward Wayne Edwards
00:46:27
of not just the Peyton Allen killings, but also being the Zodiac, wrote about it in August 7, 2009
00:46:35
on her true crime blog, True Crime Diary, she thinks... Michelle McNamara, everybody.
00:46:42
Michelle McNamara. So she writes, she thinks he's responsible for this murder, the Peyton Allen murder, and that he's the Zodiac.
00:46:53
Does she really? Yeah. Shit. She writes, one of the strange results of DNA technology,
00:46:58
and this is right when they caught him, is technology advancements, is that it means a lot of tired old men
00:47:04
suddenly have to pay for their sins from 30, 40, 50 years ago. That's right. And she says, now suspects in the coldest of cold cases,
00:47:20
so close to making it to the finish line without punishment, are being pushed into courtrooms in their wheelchairs.
00:47:27
Yeah, that's right. That's so prophetic. It's fucking nuts. That's crazy. I know. When I found it, I got fucking goosebumps.
00:47:37
Edward Wayne Edwards died on April 7, 2011, just a few weeks into his life sentence in Wisconsin.
00:47:46
He never said whether he did or didn't kill Larry Payton and Beverly Allen. And Multnomah.
00:47:56
Multnomah. Thank you. The county decided. Not to reopen the investigation after he was caught.
00:48:03
And so we're not totally sure who the killer is, but a lot of people think it's Edward Wayne Edwards.
00:48:08
And that's the murder of Larry Payton and Beverly Allen. Wow. That was great. Thank you.
00:48:17
Why is it always chaos when we link up? Because nobody plans anything, bro. Good thing the rogue's ready like that.
00:48:23
For real. Rain, dirt, whatever. Available all-wheel drive. Five modes. We still outside.
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And they got some kick too. That turbo? Torque is crazy. The most in its class. It moves, moves.
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Rogue doesn't mess around and peep the space. Merch on merch, gear, mics, all of it fits.
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Load up, we out. 2026 Nissan Rogue. Built for all of it. Auto Pacific Segmentation. 2026 Rogue versus latest in-market competitors in the ex-SUV
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mainstream mid-sides class, excluding electrical vehicles based on manufacturer websites.
00:48:59
Hey, everyone. It's Cal Penn, host of Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club.
00:49:03
This week on the podcast, I'm sitting down with Divergent author Veronica Roth to talk about her sprawling new novel, Seek the Traitor's Son.
00:49:11
It's a sci-fi fantasy epic about two protagonists on opposite sides of a war and a prophecy neither of them wanted.
00:49:18
My first book was Divergent. And when that came out, like because it was so popular, I think it attracted like mostly positivity.
00:49:25
but the negativity I sucked in like a sponge. And I think it was like critiques of things I liked when I was like,
00:49:34
you know, I was 23 and I wrote this book and it had all my like dorky little cheesy
00:49:37
or maybe unrealistic loves in it. And I started to feel a lot of shame about those things.
00:49:44
And so for the rest of my career, I steered away from those little things that like make you feel pleasure when you read.
00:49:52
But I also was like saying no to these parts of myself that I then was like, screw it.
00:50:00
So that's this book. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
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00:51:10
Tonight, I'm going to present to you the very bizarre story of Edmund Crefield and the Bride of Christ cult.
00:51:19
Ooh. Yeah. This is a story that takes place, for the most part, it takes place in Corvallis, Oregon.
00:51:31
Yeah. Okay. Ooh, turf war. Yeah, because it's University of Oregon versus Oregon State.
00:51:40
Oh. Of course, Oregon State, the fighting. hold on she's gonna answer well now i know it's beavers i know i was gonna say
00:51:52
the fighting fighter tons yeah and then of course university of oregon who are the
00:51:57
dutch yep the fighting dutch great the fighting dutch versus the fighting firetons every year it is
00:52:09
vicious. There are colors. There are lines drawn. Families separated. Brother against
00:52:15
brother. Who will win? The Dutch or the Fireton? I said the Fighting Fightingtons.
00:52:22
The Fighty Fightertons. But Firetons is good too. They don't care. They don't care. They don't care. I don't care.
00:52:29
It's because they're fighting so hard they don't give a single shit. That's right.
00:52:33
It's all that fighting. Guys, don't fight with each other over sports. Fighting.
00:52:37
fight with each other over turf. It's cooler. And rings. And rings. I got most of the information that I'm about to read to you
00:52:47
from an article written by someone named Finn J.D. John. So that's a name, some initials, and then another name.
00:52:55
It's not a real person, clearly. No. But thank you so much. It doesn't work. Good try.
00:53:01
It was like an alien was like, how do humans name themselves? PhD at the end. Okay.
00:53:07
Good job. He wrote it for offbeatoregon.com, your favorite website. Oh, sure. They love it.
00:53:14
And, of course, I used the fuck out of Wikipedia because there's nothing I love more than going
00:53:21
into a document where I cut and paste a big chunk of text and then just deleting commas.
00:53:25
I'm not kidding. I think I might make a video just talking about commas and how all you need to do is
00:53:34
say it aloud in your head and if you pause you can stick one there like she just paused comma if
00:53:40
you pause you stick one right in there but if there's no pausing comma take your finger off
00:53:47
that fucking comma button period period we gonna period that one okay that my new and Close your window on a plane Aggressive grammar tips from Karen Franz Edmund Crefield was born somewhere in Germany in 1870
00:54:08
It's unclear how, just starting with a lot of question marks, but Edmund is what he went by, and he first appears in Portland in 1903.
00:54:18
He's in his 30s, so he does what we all do when we're in our 30s. We join the Salvation Army.
00:54:25
And he gets sent on a mission to Corvallis to fucking fix it. I'm on a mission. Here's the thing.
00:54:46
Soon after, he decides to break with the Salvation Army because they're not holy enough.
00:54:50
Good choice. Those people fucking love the Bible. I don't know what this person is talking about.
00:54:57
So he decides to form his own church, which he calls the Brides of Christ. The Fighting Brides of Christ.
00:55:03
Fun, look at them. Of course he wants a bunch of brides. God. Holy shit. They look like fun.
00:55:10
Here's the thing about Christ. I want to marry him and be his bride. But they, yeah.
00:55:18
Yeah. I see the name Esther. I see the name May. You can? I see the name Maude. I'm not kidding you.
00:55:25
Get in there. Fucking names abound. Esther again. Did I say Esther? Esther again.
00:55:30
Una. There's an Una. There's an Edna. Jesus. This is old timey. Is Methuselah up there?
00:55:40
All the best old fashioned names. Okay. Okay. We can leave that up there just so you understand what's happening.
00:55:48
Just so you can creep the fuck. They're all ghosts. What you can't see is that none of them have eyes.
00:55:54
Oh, no, no, wait. They have eyes. Oh, they do. Okay, I just don't have my glasses on.
00:56:00
So the Brides of Christ, so his church, since the Salvation Army wasn't holy enough for him,
00:56:06
his church, they're going to get strict. That's what this guy's all about. Great.
00:56:10
So the Brides of Christ are made to pray face down on the floor. They're planking?
00:56:16
Yep. Their abs were rock hard. Oh, yeah. Shavasana. Christ is like, I don't know who to pick.
00:56:28
You're all so fit. But then as the service progresses, and his services were super long,
00:56:36
he was really loud. He was like a crazy screamer. Great. And as he preached, they would go from praying face down on the floor
00:56:45
to rolling around on the floor, like writhing around for the Lord. He loves that.
00:56:53
Yes. That's his favorite move. He loves it. Burning bushes, rolling on the floor.
00:57:00
He really was like, I'm into breakdancing, but they didn't know what it was yet.
00:57:03
Yeah, he was like, it's just a feeling I have. It feels good. You know, you've got to use a piece of cardboard on the ground
00:57:10
or you're going to hurt yourself. They're like, no, no, that idea is crazy. Hold it until the 80s.
00:57:15
Late 70s. But this is where we get the term holy roller. What? Yeah. That's rad.
00:57:23
I'm not kidding. I love one of these calls. I fucking swear to God. How come I was the only person who got excited about that?
00:57:31
They're all like, oh, we got taught that in third grade. This is Oregon. The thing of terms.
00:57:39
Etymology. Yep. I love that so much. Where things come from. Yes. Well, then fucking drink it in.
00:57:46
Should we take a pause? I'm always like, where did I come from? Where did the term holy rollers come from?
00:57:50
Whole nine yards. What's that all about? You know? These are the mysteries of the universe.
00:57:58
First of all, you came from your parents. I think I had too much protein today. Were you just like chowing down on cheese?
00:58:06
Lots of meat. Okay. Okay, so holy rollers. Sorry, go. Yes. No, no, it's fine. This is what we're here for.
00:58:13
these church services are loud intense and disruptive to the neighbor um it's full of
00:58:20
wailing and the gnashing of teeth which that could definitely be that was definitely ripped
00:58:26
straight out of finn jd john's writing so he might have just been exaggerating although i love the
00:58:32
idea especially if you're gnashing your teeth facing the ground how many fucking raisins would
00:58:37
you end up eating then? Pick up a little dirt. Okay, so, and they would last for hours and hours.
00:58:46
And finally, when the church services started running into the early morning, the neighbors were like,
00:58:52
get the fuck out of here. And back then, it's not like they shared walls. No, no, no.
00:58:59
This is like a guy lived fucking eight miles away and he was like, shut the fuck up.
00:59:04
All of my livestock is awake now. What are you doing? God doesn't like you more.
00:59:12
That's what I would have said from my field. That's what I would have shouted over the barbed wire, the handmade barbed wire.
00:59:20
So eventually Creffield is barred from holding his services within the city limits of Corvallis.
00:59:26
Okay. So they get around it, though, because one of the devotees, one of the brides,
00:59:33
one of those gorgeous ladies up there, the one named Sarah Hurt, invites the flock to move into her house,
00:59:43
just outside of town, with her and her three children, Maude, Frank, and May. So they end up burning...
00:59:50
What? Yes. This is so fucking weird. They move in, and then they end up burning everything that was in the house So I sure A purpose Yeah yeah Oh they like no more You don get any earthly possessions Goodbye couch Yeah They burned everything including
01:00:06
That's a beautiful vintage furniture. Yes. Fucking... Furniture. R.I.P. It says utensils, which I was like,
01:00:13
did they carve forks out of wood? Probably. How did your utensils burn? Heirlooms and family pets.
01:00:20
Woo! Yeah. This dog's like, lean me the fuck out of this. Not only did they burn everything, they're living in a big empty house, all the people.
01:00:32
They bar the windows. And then eventually he starts saying, you're not allowed to talk to any outsiders.
01:00:37
He does the classic cult thing of, if they're not in this sect, then they can't be trusted.
01:00:43
He calls them infidels. And what ends up happening is, because he's so strict and he has all these rules and he starts controlling what they can wear.
01:00:53
and all this stuff. When they started out, it was like 20 families or whatever that were in this church.
01:01:00
But slowly but surely, all the husbands are like, yeah, I'm not fucking going to that church anymore.
01:01:04
That guy's not the boss of me. You know how men are. So slowly but surely, the men are just like,
01:01:12
yeah, you can go to that thing by yourself. So the wives stay in the cult. The men are out.
01:01:17
And then Edmund starts saying, well, if your husband's not in the church, you have to stop talking to him.
01:01:22
and you have to stop fucking him. And basically you have to stop being his wife.
01:01:25
And the wife's like, great. Like, oh no, that totally sucks. If only God didn't want this.
01:01:34
I guess I'll stay here and burn shit with my friends. Sorry, Herbert. And they're like, by the way, keep the dog, keep the dog, keep the dog.
01:01:43
Leave that fucking dog alone. So now we get to the clothing. He basically is like everything, because it's strict and it's religious
01:01:52
and everything has to be very plain and simple. And it's the turn of the century.
01:01:56
So he's like, no petticoats, no aprons, no extras. Great. And then, right? Well, eventually, the women start wearing basically a plain cloth robe.
01:02:07
That's creepy. Which is horrifying. I went to fucking Bliss Spas, no brag, the other day in Los Angeles to get a massage.
01:02:16
And I put that robe on. And it was just like a little small. Yeah. And I felt like I was walking around nude.
01:02:22
It was one of the most embarrassing. So, like, just to walk around in a robe. Or can we roll around more likely?
01:02:29
To roll around. Or your robe can go hither and yawn. No. Zip it up. Get some buttons on there.
01:02:39
You're a caftan, girl. I fucking hear you. I'm turtleneck unitard, girl. That's my jam.
01:02:50
So essentially the neighbors can see that there are women. It's 1905 or whatever.
01:02:58
And they're fucking walking around these fields in just kind of a loose robe. And people are like, what the fuck is going on over there?
01:03:05
I see ankles. I see ankles. Oh, my God. Look at those ankles. There's people lined up to stare at ankles.
01:03:11
But, of course, the robes are inadequate to protect female modesty. And, of course, very easy to take off.
01:03:18
so the whole town is of course just gossiping their asses off they're just like who are those
01:03:25
people how much do they fuck let's talk about the fucking i love fucking but i can't talk about it
01:03:30
because it's 1903 so let's talk about them fucking they gotta leave their husbands what
01:03:35
what this is awesome um and they're all it doesn't help that they're all it's two men
01:03:41
and then like 20 women living in a house together so of course everyone's it's gossip
01:03:47
the period sink it's crazy it's one big red tent um so uh i said that already um
01:04:00
and now they're out of sight they can't talk to their loved ones they're you know and now
01:04:06
this is when edmund starts saying that god is talking directly to him and telling him things
01:04:12
keep your eye out for that one always just in and around your life somebody like hips you to the
01:04:18
fact that god is speaking to them you just fucking nope right out of there that's your right
01:04:22
and also the the locals are like if you all live in a quote live in the same locked house with a
01:04:31
number of young girls and you do nothing like how could you do nothing in the world but be religious
01:04:36
That's impossible. So in January of 1904, 20 vigilantes called the Whitecaps seized Creffield.
01:04:44
Vigilantes are never. Well, you know what they're about? What? In Corvallis in 1904, they take him down to the river and tar and feather him.
01:04:53
Oh, what did he do? Yeah. What did he do? No, but did he? No. Yeah. That sucks. I'm on the Whitecaps side.
01:05:05
I think this guy's a creep. Let's not fight like the fighting firetons. They tell him to leave town and never come back.
01:05:19
And he responds by appearing the very next day at the courthouse. Ow, stop tarring and feathering me.
01:05:25
Ow, this hurts. It's really hot. Yeah. The next day, he shows up at the courthouse in Lynn County.
01:05:32
His skin is bright red from scrubbing. he reeks of turpentine which is the only way to get that shit off
01:05:38
and he is there to marry one of his followers Maud who is the daughter of Mrs. Hurt the house that they live in
01:05:46
and she is that family is very highly respected Corvallis pioneers which is a great idea so basically he is trying to legitimize himself and maybe keep from having that ever happen to him again
01:06:06
So in February of 1904, the next month, he is accused of having adulterous relations in Portland with Maud's aunt.
01:06:15
The girl he marries, she has an aunt named Donna. In 1904, someone's named Donna, which is the best,
01:06:21
either a humongous mistake or the best thing that's ever happened. Yeah, like they spelt the real name wrong.
01:06:27
Or what if there's just a lady with like super tight bell-bottom jeans that's like in 1904 Corvallis?
01:06:33
She's having a glass of Chablis. She's just like, what's up? I'm Donna. She's chewing gum and drinking wine at the same time.
01:06:39
Smoking a fucking Virginia Slim. Yeah. I'm Donna. She's like, I painted my own nails and I'm here to party.
01:06:47
It's me, Donna. Time travel is real. Yes. I'm here to prove it. Um, so because back then adultery was a criminal offense, a warrant is put out for Edmund's
01:07:00
arrest, but he of course is nowhere to be found. A statewide man hunt goes on for months.
01:07:05
And meanwhile, the Holy Rollers are fasting and they're spending all their days laying
01:07:11
flat and praying for him. Oh my God. He's like, he's not there. He won't know. You can tell him you prayed for him.
01:07:16
He won't know. Also, there's a roller derby team called the Holy Rollers. and I can't stop thinking about them instead.
01:07:27
They're all actually direct descendants of these people. They're great at skating.
01:07:34
So in June, most of the Brides of Christ end up getting committed to an insane asylum.
01:07:42
Oh. Yep. So then, guess what happens? Tell me what happens then. In July, Creffield is discovered nude and starving,
01:07:51
underneath the house that they all lived in. Yeah. So the whole time he had just been under there,
01:07:58
he was like, I've got the perfect hiding place and now I'm going to strip down to my nothings.
01:08:04
I just need to wait for my ladies upstairs to hand me food. And then, but he doesn't know they're all gone.
01:08:09
Oh, he's just like waiting. They've all been carted away. Shit. Then he would have known if they weren't praying for him.
01:08:14
Ooh, good one, Edmund. Okay. His trial begins in fall of 1904. he claims that he's innocent and he tells the court that having sex with
01:08:24
Donna was part of that God ordered purification ritual that he convinced his followers was real.
01:08:32
So he basically, because he was getting messages from God, of course, you know, the next step is he's going to claim that he is God.
01:08:40
Just spoiler alert. And he's a spoiler alert, right? It's the same every time, like a horror movie.
01:08:47
so he convinces everybody that you have to be purified by him the one closest to God
01:08:53
and of course the way you purify people you fuck them that holy dick we know that
01:09:00
that God given D what are you talking about what is this there are children here
01:09:09
no that would be horrifying when he gets out wait here they send him, he's found guilty of course
01:09:20
immediately and he serves 17 months in the Oregon State Penitentiary let's hear it now
01:09:26
parole when he gets released a year and a half later he claims he is Jesus Christ
01:09:34
risen from the dead wow that was a quick turnaround and then his resurrection is his emergence from prison
01:09:42
right? it's all so symbolic I feel like that's been tried before. Yeah. And it probably doesn't work.
01:09:48
People are like, you're just not that Jesus-y to me. He also claims, this is a good one, that he was responsible for the 1906 San Francisco
01:09:57
earthquake. That was him. What a dick. He did it. You know, he had to. He was forced.
01:10:05
And all of his followers who have since been released from the asylum and have come back,
01:10:10
they all believe him, of course. and then the groomers of course are now, it's crazy
01:10:15
because now they're back and they're getting their act back together and everyone's going nuts
01:10:19
and so the rumors are, some of the rumors are mothers in the sect are being debauched in front
01:10:25
of their daughters so it's like group sex rumors essentially but they took a really long time to say it
01:10:31
in 1903 there are rumors of child sacrifice which were not true and were not in any way
01:10:37
proven but of course, fun thing to gossip about So the one that caught hold was that because he admitted to that God-sanctified purification rite of fucking everybody,
01:10:50
then this weird rumor started that he believed that Jesus was coming back and one of the brides of Christ was going to be Mary.
01:10:58
And so he had to choose who Mary was by the laying on of hands, which, you know, boss.
01:11:04
I bet. Right? Laying on of hands. So they also began to say that the new Mary was a 16-year-old girl named Esther Mitchell who was in the group.
01:11:20
So it's basically like the town is just creating these fictions because this crazy shit is happening right outside of town.
01:11:27
Oh, here's him. This is Edmund Crefield after he got out of jail for adultery. I'm excited.
01:11:33
Look at her. Hello, girl. Well, he looks just like Jesus Christ. He is the spitting image of Jesus Christ.
01:11:47
Look at his face. His face is like, he's saying, can you fucking believe I'm getting away with this?
01:11:51
He's like, come here, girl. Let me purify you. Yeah. I mean, the stink waves that must...
01:12:00
Coming off this fucking fella. Jesus. He didn't realize pictures were permanent.
01:12:08
He didn't. He's like, I'm going to be pouting in mine because I'm mad I went to jail.
01:12:12
Oh my God. William Defoe will play him in the film. Oh, totally. Right? Okay. What's that?
01:12:23
What's going on? They have front dandruff? That's horrifying. How do you cure that?
01:12:29
Okay. The laying on of hands. Among the devotee brides of Christ are a woman named Cora Hartley and her daughter Sophia.
01:12:43
And so Cora's husband, Louis, or Louis, I am not sure, he's a wealthy mine owner.
01:12:50
Okay. And they had all joined the church together. Louis immediately was like, thank you, but no thank you.
01:12:56
and then his daughter and wife stayed in and then stopped talking to him and were like you're bad and you're an infidel
01:13:03
but when Crefield went to jail they just went back to the house and they were just like well we're not talking to you
01:13:08
but we're stewards so go live here of course all of the men whose wives stayed in this cult were
01:13:16
you know very shamed publicly cuckolded once all this rumor started of like this one guy is fucking all these
01:13:22
people the horror and the scandal was a lot when she gets home she tells Louis or Louis her husband
01:13:32
Edmund Creffield is Jesus Christ when she does decide to talk to him he condemned the city of San Francisco
01:13:39
and brought the earthquake and he has condemned the city of Corvallis and an earthquake
01:13:42
will destroy this place great did you see I put in a toilet it's an in house I only want to talk about the earthquake
01:13:51
It's like an outhouse, but in the house. He will destroy you. Great. Where is my robe?
01:13:59
Yeah. Cora went nuts. Okay, you like him. We get it. So Crefield now calls his flock back.
01:14:06
He's like, I'm out of jail, and now you need to follow me into the wilderness, which was Newport.
01:14:16
I guess back then it was nuts abandoned or something. And so they, Cora and Sophia immediately pack their bags and they're just like, thank God.
01:14:28
They pack their one robe in their bag. They have a huge bag. Single, very see-through robe goes inside of it.
01:14:36
Small Bible. Toothbrush. Cardboard. But Lewis is watching them. Cardboard for breakdancing.
01:14:47
Exactly. Lewis is watching them and he's just like, yeah, this isn't happening. So he basically follows them
01:14:55
and he brings a gun. And so just as Edmund Crefield and his flock of holy rollers
01:15:01
are boarding the ferry, Lewis Hartley walks up and he fires a revolver four times
01:15:07
at Crefield. Crefield is not killed. He's not shot. What happens is Lewis fucked up
01:15:15
and he used center fire cartridges for a rimfire gun. Can you believe that dumbass fucking,
01:15:22
oh, when people do that. Dummy. Watch your cartridges. So, but what would be more convincing
01:15:30
if you were in a cult and the guy that's like, I'm God and Jesus and you have to fuck me.
01:15:34
And then someone's like, and he's like, anyway, let's get on this ferry. We have got to get
01:15:39
to that wilderness ASAP. You would double down on that deed. Yes. You would just be like,
01:15:45
purify me tonight, Edmund. I take it back he's gross I don't know about these live shows
01:16:00
they seem a little crazy angry husbands and fathers are on the way to kill this man
01:16:09
they all had it Edmund knows this isn't going to be the only one so he takes his wife Maude
01:16:16
and they flee to Seattle so I mean okay save it for tomorrow night so one of the other people
01:16:30
that was super pissed off and had a gun that he knew how to use was a guy named George Mitchell
01:16:35
and he was the brother of 16 year old Esther Mitchell who everybody was talking about and saying she was the Virgin Mary and that she had been purified by Creepo And so George Mitchell actually followed Edmund to Seattle
01:16:53
walked up behind him in front of witnesses, and shot him twice in the back of the head and killed him.
01:16:59
Oh, my God! Wow. Some bloodthirsty motherfuckers up here. The murder attracted natural attention and was major news in the Pacific Northwest for weeks.
01:17:15
And there was widespread sympathy for George Mitchell, the murderer. George claimed that the law wouldn't keep Creffield away from his sister, so he had to do it himself.
01:17:25
And that defense worked. The jury finds Mitchell not guilty in spite of the fact that he had admitted in open court that he had, in fact, murdered Edmund Creffield.
01:17:36
He was like, guilty. and they were like, not 50. No, you're not, buddy. No, you're not.
01:17:42
You keep it up. You old so-and-so. You, bro. But wait. I wrote that down. Two days later, Esther Mitchell asks her brother George,
01:17:56
he's free, she's like, can we please meet at a railroad depot? You know how brothers and sisters do.
01:18:02
For what family members hoped was going to be a reconciliation, but instead Esther walked up
01:18:08
and shoots her brother twice in the back of the head just like her brother had shot Edmund Creffield.
01:18:14
Shut up. I won't. And the gun she used to do that was bought by Creffield's wife, Maude.
01:18:22
Holy shit. And before the case even goes to trial, Maude takes a massive amount of strychnine
01:18:29
and kills herself. Oh my God. So she's out. Wow. Just don't bring her up again. We're not talking about her anymore.
01:18:37
Goodbye. Esther's brought to trial, and she's found not guilty by reason of insanity,
01:18:42
and she's committed to Western State Hospital in Stealacum, Washington. Stealacum, I said.
01:18:52
The press tries to get Esther to tell them that she killed her brother because God told her to.
01:18:57
Just tell us that God. It's funny. It's interesting. Yeah, we won't quote you. But instead, she tells them she did exactly what her brother did,
01:19:04
that the law did nothing about her brother killing Edmund Creffield, so she had to kill him herself.
01:19:09
And then she pointed out that George had done exactly what he'd accused Creffield of doing.
01:19:15
He'd branded her a fornicator because she said she'd never had sex with Creffield,
01:19:20
and by making the statement that he killed Creffield because Creffield had ruined his sister,
01:19:25
George had, in effect, ruined his sister. Esther is released from the asylum in 1909,
01:19:31
and a few days later, she takes a massive dose of Strict 9 and fucking kills herself.
01:19:37
And that is the end of the Brides of Christ Holy Rollers Edmund Crefielde cult. The end.
01:19:47
Mayhem. Death and mayhem. That was a fucking... That was a... Rollercoaster. That was a raisin in your pocket,
01:19:58
wasn't it? Great job. That was amazing. Thank you. Do we have time for a hometown?
01:20:02
You know we do. We have to. Ladies and gentlemen, it's Vince Averill right there.
01:20:10
What's that? Oh, he brought her a sandwich. He brought me some protein. So nice of you.
01:20:17
Also, Vince, show them what you're wearing. Oh, no, you didn't wear... I thought I was going to wear a ring out.
01:20:21
Oh, I forgot the prompt. All right. We have some rules of where the hometown that you've heard a million times, but somehow ignore them.
01:20:28
It's good to update. so here's the thing about the hometowns god this theater is so gorgeous it's crazy
01:20:36
look at the like uh cantaloupe ceiling yes it's really beautiful that's right uh-huh listeners at home we promise we're in a huge cantaloupe right now inside i can't
01:20:52
Georgia and the giant cantaloupe. It is the most vegan show we've ever done. So if you get picked to tell your hometown,
01:21:03
it has to be, we really need it to be from Oregon. It's what everybody wants. If it can be from Portland, that's cool too.
01:21:09
Please do not come up here and tell us shit from Chicago. We don't care tonight.
01:21:14
We care a different time. If you're like, I'm from here, but my murder happens, and then I move there.
01:21:19
Then we both kill you with our eyes Um let see what else If you drunk make sure you can tell a story drunk and not like oh my god this is crazy drunk and shouting out to people that no one
01:21:33
cares about and all that kind of stuff. Stay on point, beginning, middle, end, make it quick because everyone
01:21:39
hates you for getting picked and now Georgia will choose the hometown for tonight.
01:21:43
Okay. Okay, oh this is so hard and scary and sad. Just go with your gut feel feelings.
01:21:51
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes. Come on up here. Go over there. Go that way. She's been chosen.
01:21:59
The hometown has been chosen. Let's all look at my rings while she's on her way up here.
01:22:05
Can we get the lights turned down so she doesn't have a panic attack? Oh, yeah. Cassidy Jewelry.
01:22:09
It's called Cassidy Vintage Jewelry. She'll be walking out of here tonight with a bag of jewelry,
01:22:16
so just grab them if you want. No. Hello. Gary, don't get robbed. Hi. Hi. You volunteered for it.
01:22:27
I'm a mom. Okay, great. Hi. She said, I'm a mom. What? We're not going to be nice to you because you're a mom.
01:22:36
I'm a mom. It's terrifying. Isn't it horrible? You're doing great. There's a raisin in this for you.
01:22:50
You might earn a raisin. So I'm shaking. So I work for a local children's hospital here in Portland.
01:23:01
Been there 37 years. Wow. How many? 37. 37 years? Yeah. I'm your oldest hometown bird right back.
01:23:10
Back in 2007, our security guard, Char, we both worked their early shift. I worked in medical records.
01:23:19
And Char had a son. I'm shaking. I am too. Michael. Michael was 36, and he had this girlfriend named Jacqueline.
01:23:30
She kind of was stalking him. And so he finally broke up with her and got a restraining order against her.
01:23:38
Well, we're at work one day, and on the news is a story about a murder in, sorry, southeast Portland, and Char's watching the news.
01:23:51
It's her house. Oh, fuck. And Jacqueline, two weeks before, had convinced some poor girl to call Michael to tell him that she had committed suicide.
01:24:05
Well, she hadn't. She was crazy. so we believe you some months before that she had actually stolen his house keys
01:24:15
had gotten in there and i said sure aren't you kind of like worried she goes and now she's fine
01:24:19
anyway so shara sees the thing on tv and is going oh my god that's that's my house
01:24:26
jacqueline was outside and michael had no clue thought she was dead michael comes out to go to
01:24:32
work and she murders him in front of his front of his house out on southeast boise street
01:24:38
anybody who knows portland and char's watching this on tv oh my god well the police knew that
01:24:45
michael lived with his mother but they thought she was some old lady upstairs she wasn't she
01:24:50
was our badass security guard at the children's hospital amazing and so the police get there
01:24:58
Jacqueline takes off in her car. She's like 30 years old. She takes off on speeds of 100 miles
01:25:04
an hour to Central Oregon to Bend. And yeah, yeah, man. They finally catch up with her. She
01:25:12
shoots herself in the head, ends up in the Bend hospital, and she dies. So she didn't go to jail
01:25:19
for this. Well, come to find out, she had had over 80 restraining orders filed against her.
01:25:25
so they I don't know if it ever got put into effect that when restraining orders are filed
01:25:31
for those things that the person filing the restraining order is supposed to know about them
01:25:35
because if Michael had known he would have gone into hiding she was she was absolutely crazy um
01:25:42
most heartbreaking thing though for Char to watch that on the news at work and realize oh my god
01:25:47
that's my son yeah so that's that's my hometown murder amazing oh my god Jesus You guys give it up for Mary Ann
01:26:02
That was the best Wait a second What that That for you I got the raisin Yeah you earned that
01:26:15
That's for you. I'll keep it forever. She gets the raisin. Thank you so much. Great job.
01:26:22
Holy shit. Good pick. Thank you. Now I have to eat the whole sandwich. that's what we're looking for that's what we're looking for
01:26:37
come on marianne marianne marianne beautiful amazing man we need to bring a raise in every show
01:26:49
the magic raises i'm just the fucking ante that's right it makes people really perform yeah
01:26:56
oh my god portland two magical nights with you guys this has been honestly we love it here so much you guys specifically portland has you guys have been
01:27:10
so supportive of us since the fucking beginning we could just do shows here forever truly love it
01:27:15
here you also i like it because i see i it's i have observed that it seems like you guys are the
01:27:22
ones that get the angriest when you don't get tickets and i like that too that's that's just
01:27:27
as good as getting tickets it's just rage total rage at us on twitter as if we fucking control it
01:27:34
and but here's the thing you guys have been there from the beginning like that's when they very first
01:27:40
were planned these tours they were just like the our our tour engines just they do it all by numbers
01:27:45
and by like listening to numbers and breaking it down math i don't know they're all up in your
01:27:50
computer but they're just like well you have to go to portland and then we had to do three show we
01:27:54
had to add we had to do three shows the first time and then we had to do two for they had to add a
01:27:58
show to this it's amazing so thank you guys so much for supporting us also fucking love it here
01:28:02
we talked about it a lot but portland one of those first portland shows was the legendary
01:28:08
one where everyone got so fucked up because they were doing a drink special of tall boy beers
01:28:13
mcminimans and that girl um threw up and then crawled up the aisle to the bathroom so you guys
01:28:25
have a special place in our hearts i mean i'll never stop loving you because of that truly but
01:28:31
truly this is all you guys and you guys supporting each other and coming together and you know making
01:28:36
friends and making these groups and just uh being the fucking best thank you so much we're really
01:28:41
really grateful for everything you guys do for us. It's very fun. We're having the time of our lives. We really are.
01:28:53
It's the weirdest fucking experience, but it is the best, and it's because you guys and your support.
01:28:59
So thank you so much, and stay sexy. And... Bye, you guys. Thank you, Portland. Thank you.
01:29:11
Bro, from the show last night to this drive, why is it never chill? Because this is our life. Backstage, on the road, it's loud, messy, real.
01:29:21
And that's the best part. Whole crew, no plan, just moving. Good thing Nissan builds for that kind of chaos.
01:29:28
Not just test tracks, real life scenes, late nights, road trips, all of it. That's why it holds up. Nissan was ranked number one in initial quality among mainstream brands by J.D. Power.
01:29:39
Yeah, you can tell. 2026 Nissan Rogue built for what really happens. For J.D. Power 2025 U.S. Initial Quality Study Award information, visit jdpower.com slash awards.
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Awards based on 2025 model year, newer models may be shown. Running a business shouldn't feel like surviving a software group project.
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One app for accounting, another for inventory, another for sales. And somehow, none of them talk to each other.
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That's where Odoo comes in. An all-in-one business management software that brings every part of your business together.
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From sales and accounting to inventory and marketing, all-in-one powerful platform.
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No messy integrations, no bouncing between tabs. And best of all, no spreadsheets.
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Stop managing software and start managing your business with one unified system.
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Try for free today at odoo.com slash iHeartRadio. That's odoo.com slash iHeartRadio.
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Across America, money is being abandoned. By taking a few seconds to check lift before your next ride,
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you can give money a better home. Inside your wallet. Save the money. Check lift.