Search Captions & Ask AI

MFM Minisode 228

May 24, 2021 /

This episode covers stories of a fruit-eating axe murderer in Seattle, a lineman's dangerous job, and a woman who found a corpse in a freezer. The hosts, Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark, share listener-submitted tales that blend humor and horror.

Listeners hear about a bizarre series of break-ins in Seattle's Queen Anne neighborhood, where a man was stealing fruit and later linked to a murder. The hosts discuss the absurdity of the situation and the fear it instilled in residents.

Another story features a lineman who responds to a traffic accident involving a wood chipper, where an alarming amount of women's undergarments were found scattered among the wreckage. This leads to a humorous discussion about the implications of such a discovery.

The episode also includes a chilling account of a woman who unknowingly purchased a freezer containing her neighbor's deceased mother, revealing the dark side of social security fraud.

Throughout the episode, the hosts maintain a light-hearted tone while addressing serious topics, showcasing their signature blend of comedy and true crime storytelling.

TLDR

This episode features stories about a fruit-eating axe murderer, a lineman's accident, and a corpse found in a freezer.

Episode

30:47
00:00:00
This is exactly right. Isn't some far off concept? It's already here. Next starts now.
00:00:33
Hyundai, an official partner of FIFA. Goodbye. When a charming neurosurgeon rode into Frontier Town
00:00:39
selling a persona of confidence and care, patients trusted him. He wore cowboy boots in the operating room
00:00:45
and became sought after by patients. He promised to heal them. Instead, he left a trail of broken bodies.
00:00:51
This is a story of greed, betrayal, and a fight for justice. Listen to Dr. Death the Cowboy wherever you get your podcasts
00:00:58
or binge the entire series right now only with Audible. Goodbye. The best parts of summer aren't just places, they're feelings.
00:01:07
It's the scent of fresh ocean air, sun-warmed skin, and long evenings outside. Pura's new summer collection is designed to capture those fleeting moments and make them last.
00:01:16
Restore your sense of place with clean, premium fragrances you control from your phone.
00:01:21
Bring the feeling of summer home. Discover the collection at Pura.com. Goodbye. Goodbye.
00:01:28
My favorite murder Hello! And welcome to my favorite murder. What? The Man Who Said.
00:01:48
Thank you for joining me in what could have been a real embarrassing moment. I've taken improv.
00:01:54
I know how to yes and like. You just yes anded me so hard. My head is spinning. Can you feel the agreement going up your spine?
00:02:03
Yes. Into my head and neck. That's right. You heightened. You agreed and heightened.
00:02:07
That's right. I've taken improv one twice. Hold on. Wait a second. Ring, ring. The Groundlings.
00:02:14
Yes, she's here. Okay. Let me see if I can patch you through. I'll take it. Are they going in?
00:02:20
You got a Groundlings scholarship right on the mini-sode. This is powerful stuff.
00:02:25
right to the top of the groundlings, which is actually a one story building. On the roof!
00:02:34
Right to street level. Oh, wow. And this is what you can expect from this mini show
00:02:39
today. And from our new live improv show. I'm agreeing, but it sounds like I'm fighting.
00:02:47
Oh, man, I have some stories from level one actress boot camp. Let me tell you right now.
00:02:53
my agent made me do this and I'm going to be the best in the class to impress the teacher.
00:03:00
And how'd it work out? I quit after like, okay, so one and a half, twice level ones, I guess.
00:03:08
But guess who made friends with the teacher? Guess who made friends with the teacher?
00:03:12
Georgia Hartzell? That's right. Cause she's a kiss ass. But sorry, you're saying you took a whole round of classes or one
00:03:18
and a half class. A round of classes. Oh, that's not quitting. That's overindulging.
00:03:25
You over... You're wrong on the other side. Now you just no-handed me. And insulted my...
00:03:32
Correctly insulted what I am capable of. Which is true. Which is clearing level one of an improv.
00:03:40
Of anything. You've done it. Sorry for the insult. Barely graduated high school, but I fucking graduated.
00:03:47
So that's all that counts. Right. Do you want to go first on this? What's supposed to be a podcast?
00:03:53
Let's do it. Ready for some blue liquid? The subject line of this is my mom meets a fruit stealing axe murderer.
00:04:00
Cool. Hey, MFM gang. In the early 90s, there was some crazy shit going down on Seattle's Queen Anne Hill.
00:04:08
It's a pretty residential neighborhood with quaint houses where you walk to bakeries and the Metropolitan Market.
00:04:13
But in 1990, there was also a dude breaking into people's houses and just eating their fruit and leaving.
00:04:20
Three days later, a resident comes home to find the axe he stored in his carport lying in the middle of his living room floor.
00:04:26
And then things got weird. In March, someone broke into a basement with a pickaxe but bailed when the owner of the house turned on the lights.
00:04:35
Presumably there was no fruit to be found. Four days later, this sweet old lady named Geneva McDonald was found brutally murdered in her house.
00:04:44
She'd been repeatedly struck with an axe and stabbed with her sewing scissors, and then her throat had been slit with a knife.
00:04:50
Oh, my God. The investigation kicks off, and during the police lockdown, the fruit-eating axe man of Queen Anne strikes again, right under the cop's nose.
00:05:03
A guy down the street from Geneva's house wakes up to see a guy holding a kitchen knife at the foot of his bed.
00:05:10
The investigation plays out, but there's no suspect. People are freaking out, including my dad, but my mom is cool as a cucumber.
00:05:17
Her guard is up, sure, but she figures the police have it under control and their fruit bowl is safe.
00:05:23
During the following months, the crazy fruit break-ins continue and my very reasonable mom is on edge.
00:05:29
Then in September, someone breaks into a house, eats all the fruit and scrawls the killer's back on the wall before leaving.
00:05:36
How have we never heard of this? I've never heard of this. We're going to have definitely have to check it out.
00:05:43
About a week later, my mom was walking down the street in the general vicinity of the house from that break in.
00:05:49
And she sees a guy calmly walking down the street with an axe. He makes super confrontational eye contact with her as he approaching and right as he passing her he smiles so serenely without blinking Of course my mom doesn have a cell phone because it 19 fucking 90 So she speed
00:06:06
walks to the grocery and calls my dad yelling, I walked past the axe murderer. He tells her to call
00:06:13
it in. So she calls the tip line and they calmly and carefully inform her that they already have
00:06:18
someone in custody and the police are wrapping up the investigation. Yeah. So like it's not him, basically.
00:06:26
It's some asshole trying to freak people out. You have probably. I'm going to scream.
00:06:29
OK, so my mom feels pretty ridiculous and my dad now she overacted. But as my mom maintains, quote, why in the world would you be walking down the street
00:06:38
with an axe? Maybe he just wanted some fruit. No. And there's no. That's it? I feel like at this point we need to take the rest of the episode to talk about this one.
00:06:48
I mean, and the rest of our lives. That's I can't. There's so many things. Yeah.
00:06:53
An axe murderer in Seattle. I feel like I want to think I would have heard of that before, but I never have.
00:07:00
That's amazing. It was in the 90s. I, yeah, I would like to go ahead and I'm sorry.
00:07:05
I'm not. Your dad's probably a fine person, but that was not an overreaction in any fucking sense
00:07:10
of the word. No, not at all. That's the if there's a that's the chillest. Yeah. Yeah. If there's an axe murder on the loose in your neighborhood, everybody gets to do whatever they want.
00:07:24
They get to call home. They get to run at the grocery store screaming. It's all valid.
00:07:30
If they got a weird feeling about a random person, but this person had the murder weapon in the neighborhood with a creepy look in his face.
00:07:40
He should have been arrested simply for being a fucking dick. well right because that's a it's basically like that was from 1990 that was a troll that's that
00:07:50
was a real life troll oh my god he's trolling the neighborhood yeah he is all right quite literally
00:07:56
i mean if you don't cover this one so we can get all the details i don't know what i'll do
00:08:00
i don't know what else i can tell you because i'm not i'm not trying to tell you what to do
00:08:05
but clearly i am but fucking do that story you're writing a note so i feel good about this i'm gonna
00:08:11
call Hannah and just be like, hey, I know she didn't say she wants to do. OK, this is called Bras in the Wood Chipper.
00:08:18
Oh, this is a little long, but it's worth it. I promise. Hey, y'all, intros are overrated.
00:08:22
Let's get into it. My husband is a lineman. The high wire electricity one, not a football player.
00:08:30
Yeah. Did you know about that? I didn't know that was a thing. Well, fire. Yes. You know, the Wichita lineman, that song.
00:08:36
That's what that song. I had no idea. The reason I know about it is because my Aunt Jo,
00:08:41
Jo Brown, was the first female lineman in San Francisco for the Pac Bell Company.
00:08:47
Steven, you're making a face of you know what it was, too. Am I the odd man out here?
00:08:51
No, I had no idea what a lineman was. That's because Steven doesn't have a mustache anymore,
00:08:56
and it's easy to project any emotion onto his face. Everything seems valid. I see some 5 o'clock shadow, so he's working on it, which we all appreciate.
00:09:04
Okay. And he is usually among the emergency responders to a scene at a scene of an accident or house fire or sometimes robberies.
00:09:13
He usually works 36 hour shifts during big storms, intense cold or wildfires. He loves his dangerous job more than anyone I've ever met.
00:09:22
And I love how much of himself he pours into ensuring the lights are on. Right. I could go on forever about how much I admire him.
00:09:29
But gag. I know you want the tea. All the caps on this. Okay, this week he was responding to a traffic accident call.
00:09:37
A bucket truck with an attached wood chipper had swerved to avoid missing a deer
00:09:42
and on the slick country roads had lost control and rolled into a ditch, knocking the utility pole onto the cab of the truck,
00:09:49
spilling their load of wood chips into the road, opening most of the workman's cabinets onto the truck and scattering the contents throughout.
00:09:57
The two men in the truck managed to climb out of the window of the truck that was now stuck on its side.
00:10:03
My husband showed up and the men were covered in blood and shaken, but otherwise OK.
00:10:08
As they waited for an ambulance to come, the men told my husband what had happened and showed him how they got out.
00:10:13
These dudes had missed being electrocuted by a mere few inches. Yeah. Once the men were being looked at by at EMS.
00:10:23
Oh, this is another husband shaming wife story. I just realized and taken to the hospital.
00:10:28
my husband and his crew got to work. When they were able to safely get a closer look,
00:10:34
they noticed bras and panties were strewn throughout the wreckage. In my husband's own
00:10:39
words, an alarming amount of undergarments. Uh-oh. The tow truck showed up and my husband and his
00:10:46
crew helped to roll the truck back over and get it loaded up so it was out of the way of the pole
00:10:51
they needed to remove and replace. It was at this point they noticed that not only had the bra and
00:10:56
panties come out of the workman's nooks in the truck, but they were shreds of fabric and more,
00:11:02
quote, undergarments in with the spilled wood chips. So a few hours later, my husband comes
00:11:09
home from lunch and is telling me the story. I immediately asked 200 questions he had no answers
00:11:15
for. Did the police show up? Did they ask about the underwear? Did they take it into evidence?
00:11:21
Did you see blood on or in the wood chipper or its chips? Hello. These are basics of amateur detective work.
00:11:28
Have my countless hours of forced true crime documentaries and endless podcasts taught you nothing.
00:11:35
For real. Drag alongs. Am I right? Yeah. You are. He said the police sheriff's department and state trooper were all in the scene at one point throughout the ordeal.
00:11:47
And they all just laughed it off. Me, however, I cannot let this go. I have not stopped thinking about it and looking up any relevant information I can find or crimes I may have been able to connect to these tree trimmers and their doubtfully harmless affinity for women underwear Anyway please tell me I not insane for thinking all of this is Red Flag City
00:12:09
As an aside, thank you for spreading awareness about mental health and its many struggles.
00:12:13
Y'all are a huge reason I just started to start a blog openly sharing my struggles with postpartum depression and psychosis,
00:12:20
psychosis, which does not get fucking talked about. I think it's rad. And through doing so, have connected so many other mothers who thought they were the only
00:12:28
ones who had a baby and went crazy. There is so much power in knowing you are not alone.
00:12:35
And her Instagram is at postpartum psycho. Wow. Wear it on your sleeve. I love it.
00:12:43
Stay sexy and thank linemen for working those polls and keeping you turned on. Tiffany, I get it.
00:12:49
Cute, cute. Good one, right? Tiffany, you're a thousand percent right about this is like it reminds me of, you know, 70s and 80s when people are like, oh, the old peeping Tom in the neighborhood.
00:13:01
It's just a funny, dumb thing that it's like, you mean step one of being a serial killer?
00:13:05
Yeah, like there's someone should be asked some questions about what the where those clothes came from and who put them there and why they're there.
00:13:17
All of these. Maybe they were doing last weekend. I feel like there have been, you know, one woman on the team who was like, that's not what happens at the end of our cycle of underwear.
00:13:30
And we don't just casually. That's not how you get rid of. I have. There's so many.
00:13:36
So play this for your husband, please. Shame on you, sir. However, thank you for your work.
00:13:43
We appreciate. OK, take to leave that and take it out. Thank you. Yeah, I mean, hey, look, because it could be that the driver of that truck bought brand new women's underwear and just had like a chipper issue, whatever.
00:13:57
But let's not just assume it's a funny joke. No, underwear stealing could be a bad thing.
00:14:04
Okay, cue 10 emails from wood chipper owners saying the thing that greases wood chippers best.
00:14:11
You didn't know this and that's okay, but I wish you would read this on the podcast is undergarments.
00:14:16
That's the only way to get it cleaned out. Dear wood chipper owner, you're full of shit.
00:14:23
We see you. What you don't know is that we got Siri to reverse record you. Oh, my God.
00:14:31
I love it. Okay. The subject line of this one is, we saw a lot of Lorona, kind of.
00:14:38
Howdy, beautiful people and pets. I'll save the pleasantries for later. Let's get into it.
00:14:43
growing up, my mother tried to shelter my sisters and I from anything horror or true crime related.
00:14:49
Why would they all have done smart? OK, obviously it didn't work because here we are now.
00:14:56
Anyways, unlike us, my cousins were exposed to all of that stuff at a very early age,
00:15:01
and they knew every Mexican folklore like the back of their hand by the age of five.
00:15:06
So one night, my family and I were driving back to drop off my cousins from spending the day with us.
00:15:11
My older cousin, we'll call him Taylor, decided this would be a great time to tell my younger sister and I about La Llorona.
00:15:19
For the audience who isn't familiar, La Llorona, or the Weeping Woman, is a Mexican folklore about a woman who drowned her children for a man.
00:15:28
But when he said he no longer wanted to be with her, she was so overcome with grief that she drowned herself.
00:15:34
And she now haunts the waters, crying and looking for children to take. Oh, my God.
00:15:40
Uh-huh. My mom quickly turned around and told him to stop lying to us, lying and lying in quotes, because she didn't want us to get scared.
00:15:48
His response was to insist she was real and that she steals little kids like me and my sister.
00:15:54
Oh, cousins, man. Right. The power of cousins. Right when that happened, my dad stopped the car and screamed.
00:16:01
And there she is pointing to a woman crawling on the side of the road, soaking wet with her hair covering her face.
00:16:09
No. However, this wasn't La Llorona Just a drunk woman leaving the bar Trying to walk home in the rain
00:16:15
Oh no My sister and I were completely lost But my cousin was scared out of his mind
00:16:21
Yeah, I fucking bet My mom said she remembered little tween hands Pawing at her face from the backseat
00:16:27
Yelling Aunt Judy, Aunt Judy My dad ended up driving off with my mom laughing My cousin traumatized
00:16:34
My sister and I confused as to what the hell just happened Thank you ladies so much for always accompanying
00:16:39
me on my commute to and from work. I even got my mom listening and she loves it.
00:16:43
She actually wanted to send in this story, but she's not too savvy with computers.
00:16:47
And then in parentheses, love you, mom. Stay sexy and don't walk home drunk. You might scare the shit out
00:16:53
of some kid. LJ. I do feel in my heart nowadays we would have picked that woman up and
00:16:59
that kid would have been doubly traumatized. La Lorena gets into the car. Oh my God.
00:17:06
Oh my God. Little children. I have a child's secret. Oh, you're tiny. No, that's the worst kind.
00:17:16
Everything about that, except for not picking the woman up, is amazing. It's horrifying.
00:17:21
I think you and I have talked about, but that's my favorite reference of standing on the side
00:17:25
of the road in a wet nightgown at night. What's the scariest thing that you do on the back roads as you're driving by yourself?
00:17:33
And then the lights come up and there's just a lady standing there in a wet nightgown.
00:17:37
That's by itself. Nothing else else has to happen. That's horrifying. I have no words.
00:17:45
That's right. Unless she's at the end of your bed when you wake up, then she's holding a snake.
00:17:50
Do you have any laundry you want me to do? I so cold I freezing All right This one called I Don Recognize That Man Story Hello my favorite murder gals Your podcast is a beacon of joy in an otherwise droll workday and I appreciate every single tantalizing episode
00:18:10
Here is a hometown, quote, things that could have gone so much worse story about my sister that creeps me to this day.
00:18:17
This is terrifying, actually. OK. But there's no wet woman in it. So don't worry.
00:18:23
it's terrifying in a dry way it just wicks the water right away my family my family home is in the woods
00:18:33
up a winding hill most people wouldn't be crazy enough to walk up we have a forest to one side
00:18:39
and a wide canyon to the front of the house so it's isolated and then she wrote I never even knew what that curtains
00:18:45
were a thing until I moved away for college that is such a specific visual that makes me understand
00:18:53
everything, which I love. Storytellers. What? Just not having, you're so far out that you don't have
00:18:58
curtains? You don't even know what curtains, you know, essentially are. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just
00:19:01
love that. You should be a writer person. Throughout our childhood, we had minor break-ins
00:19:06
at our place and our neighbors with people stealing change and jewelry, but nothing major.
00:19:12
One day, my sister was staying home sick. She'd parked her car up the hill so my parents could
00:19:17
use the carport when they got home. She was being lazy on the couch when she heard a knock at the
00:19:22
door. Normally our dog would go crazy at the sound of a human, but she'd sadly passed away the month
00:19:28
before. Still in her pajamas and feeling antisocial, my sister looked out the peephole
00:19:33
instead of opening the front door. A man she didn't recognize was there. Nothing about that
00:19:38
was unusual as our dad works in construction, so his employees will occasionally drop off tools or
00:19:43
documents. However, this dude immediately gave her a weird gut feeling. He didn't look like the normal
00:19:50
guys my dad works with. After the knocking, she could see a shadow through the Coke bottle windows.
00:19:56
Gorgeous. Pacing your face is shocked. It's like so excited. Sorry. Who is it? It's like
00:20:02
I'm noticing you with such wide eyes before I guess pacing around the front deck and heard the
00:20:07
door handle jiggle from the outside. At this point, she freaks out, grabs the phone and runs to the
00:20:15
bedroom to call 911. The operator tells her to stay quiet and on the line and that they will come
00:20:20
right away. This sounds like creepypasta, but I think because it's her sister, it's okay. It's
00:20:25
not like my friend's sister, right? Well, also just as a person who listens to the podcast,
00:20:33
Let's Not Meet and many of those, these things happen so often of like kids and people at home
00:20:40
and dudes trying to get into the house. It's very disturbing how often this happens to people.
00:20:45
Awful. Luckily, the police station is a few minutes down the road and our town is sleepy.
00:20:49
So they got there fast. As it turned out, there was not one guy casing the house, but two.
00:20:55
The first guy was at the front door. The second was working the back door, which my sister couldn't hear.
00:21:01
The police caught the first guy immediately, but had to chase second through the woods.
00:21:05
And I honestly can't remember if they caught him. The small detail. Oh, hey, mom.
00:21:12
I don't know. Anyway, we suspect the burglars thought the house was empty because the carport was.
00:21:19
When they arrested the guy at the front door, they found a 12 inch knife tucked into his waistband.
00:21:25
So it's hard to say what their actual motive was. My sister is the napping queen. Hashtag nap influencer.
00:21:33
And I shudder to think what would have happened if she'd been asleep and they got inside and found her or if she'd been extroverted enough to open the door.
00:21:42
Yeah. After all this, she was asked to testify in court, but thankfully didn't have to since the guy pled guilty.
00:21:48
My parents still live in the same house. We got a big white shepherd soon after this happened and have not had a break in since.
00:21:56
Yoo-hoo! No name. It's clearly a famous author because she's a great writer. They are a great writer.
00:22:04
That was Joan Didion wrote that in. Amazing story, Joan. is j jd or her jd or her initial um okay i so we have like two parking spaces when both the cars
00:22:19
are gone it's clear to every and they're on the street it's clear to everyone we're not there
00:22:23
how about a beater buying a beater keep car keeping it clean it's cute so it doesn't look
00:22:29
like your house is and leaving it at the house all the time in the driveway so that always seems
00:22:35
like someone's home police officers people in law enforcement criminals please let me know if that's
00:22:40
actually a thing. How about this? What if, I mean, we're not in, I don't think we're officially in
00:22:46
quarantine anymore. This isn't an issue. But if it were at the beginning of quarantine,
00:22:50
you could get a bunch of children to make a beater car out of cardboard and paint it themselves.
00:22:55
And it's like an art project of a thing that people will think is a thing, but you don't
00:23:01
actually have to buy an actual car for. Karen, you like that? You're so creative.
00:23:06
and then it's also a way to like get the neighborhood kids involved maybe they can't friends
00:23:12
they're all bored because they're not in school maybe they could get they could be interns on to pay them and then so they make
00:23:16
some credits toward elementary school kids need credit no but they have credit toward junior high yeah they could put it
00:23:24
on their junior high resume the credit for this will get you three corndogs in junior high so get
00:23:30
to work but I'm taking one of them from everyone because that's not there that would have happened tax she has to look you know you gotta pay the piper
00:23:40
oh it's your turn are you just gonna go to the next one yep all right the subject line of this
00:23:49
is found drugs which i believe is what we asked for last week we always ask for found drugs and
00:23:54
then i will declare although i'm sure i've said this before and meant it before but this is now my
00:23:59
favorite opening line ever. Okay. It just says, it's my time to shine, bitches. It is. Get ready. Oh, you've heard enough of us. We've done this. We've gotten our egos up. It's
00:24:14
yours. Time, baby. Okay. In the last minisode, you asked listeners to write in about found drugs.
00:24:19
Yeah, I was right. And I read that. So I knew that already. Sorry. My husband and I took a
00:24:26
trip to Italy. We spent three days in Rome, then took the train to Venice for another three days.
00:24:31
My husband, who is a daily toker, was feeling very desperate for his daily hit by the time we
00:24:37
reached Venice. He didn't mention his desire until a long stroll through the narrow walking
00:24:41
paths and bridges that line and cross the beautiful canals. Have you ever been to Italy?
00:24:47
Oh, God, no, I wish. I want to go there so bad. We'll go. Let's go tour Italy. Yes. Hey, Abandonza. We'd love to. I don't feel like they have any good murders there that we could do at live shows.
00:24:59
No, there's hardly been any murder over the past 5000 years. He had just purchased himself a slice of pizza while walking and eating.
00:25:09
He looked at me and said, the only thing that could make this moment any better would be if I were a little stoned.
00:25:15
Damn. And this is in all caps. Damn. If the motherfucker Italian gods didn't answer his prayers.
00:25:21
I look down without exaggeration two seconds later and there's an entire sandwich baggie full of butt.
00:25:27
Oh, my God. I scooped that shit up so fast he didn't even know what happened. I looked at him waving the baggie all abracadabra style in his face.
00:25:37
Girl, you are shining right now like a diamond. Saying, ask and you shall receive.
00:25:44
Needless to say, he spent the rest of Venice high before flushing what was left.
00:25:49
when clearly he should have returned the favor to another tourist in exactly the same manner.
00:25:55
Stay sexy and ask so you too can receive an amazing, amazing. The only way that could have gotten better in my mind, if I were if this were a book,
00:26:04
I was writing a rom-com. She would have held up the baggie. He would they wouldn't have been married yet.
00:26:10
He would have had a ring in his pocket because it was, you know, it's Italy. And he would have gotten down and been like, well, ask and you shall ask.
00:26:17
Can I ask and receive? You know, like I'm working on it. Yeah, like a play on words. I get it.
00:26:23
I'm like, well, you I asked your I'm now receiving. So do you want a pizza? My heart.
00:26:32
I trying to make up a thing that would make her say no I will not tell you and then he passes her the ring and she passes it in the baggie like that is love
00:26:40
either way it's love and then he receives it and they both get arrested and they just never see each other
00:26:47
and detained and get on the no fly list but this reminds me we've told the story so I won't get into it
00:26:54
but when Vince we bought pot in Amsterdam because that's all the moment needed We were told to.
00:27:01
It's the law. And Vince forgot to take. He found weed in his pocket at the airport going through security at the airport.
00:27:11
He had so little on him and they were clearly so used to it. They just wanted to scare him.
00:27:15
Yeah. So thank you, Amsterdam. But we were scared. It worked. I was shaking. You took me to like a duty free and you're like, it's going to be fine.
00:27:22
It's going to be fine. I was like, no, it's not. I was shaking. And you're like, look at this.
00:27:26
Here's a happy perfume by Clinique. Look at clinics happy. Smell it. I don't want it.
00:27:32
My mom wears it. I don't want it. Okay. Can I just tell you, I just realized I'm wearing sunglasses.
00:27:37
I was going to tell you. I was going to tell you. But I personally, I think it's I look I never look better than with sunglasses on my head.
00:27:45
Agree. What is that? I don't know. Sunglasses. It's like gives you a boost without wearing a bump it.
00:27:51
You know, it's just like. It's very it is a great accessory to say, like, I'm chic and I'm beautiful.
00:27:59
You don't have to worry about what my face looks like. I'm casual. Up here. Yeah.
00:28:04
And I'm like a little bit Minnie Mouse. I'm interested in sun damage. Vince has Vince and I have the best vision because we wear sunglasses constantly because
00:28:12
we're hipsters. Yeah. OK. Anyway, you're pretty hip. You are pretty hip. Can you?
00:28:16
I think so. Could you give me that? Can I at least have that? May I have that, please?
00:28:23
Okay. This is called Found Dead in a Freezer. I live in North Carolina, and I used to be housemates with this creepy dude from the tiny rural town of Goldsboro, period.
00:28:35
I thought that was a comma. Goldsboro, period, Carolina. But then it was like, oh, I already said North Carolina.
00:28:45
Okay. Yeah. Mm hmm. Hearing stories from him think literal kissing cousins makes hearing this story come at no great surprise.
00:28:53
Not everyone there is a creep, mind you. But much like that one friend who constantly dates losers, this town can't seem to keep them out.
00:29:01
Great play on words. Yeah. Back in 2016 a woman purchased a deep freezer from her neighbor A great deal on a freezer is a great deal on a freezer She paid only for it at a yard sale I can imagine what she was thinking selling this freezer And I can imagine not
00:29:17
opening it to look inside prior to purchasing. Yeah, for real. Like simple math. Yeah. But it
00:29:24
wasn't until the buyer was home with the purchase that she discovered the frozen corpse of the
00:29:30
seller's mother. Oh, my God. Yeah. Why did I save this for last? Turns out no one had seen the mother since August of 2015 because she had died reportedly of natural
00:29:41
causes and her daughter had laid her body in the freezer to continue cashing in her social security
00:29:48
checks postmortem. Oh, no. That feels like a regular thing, doesn't it? It just doesn't seem.
00:29:54
keeping the body around is just like going here's how I'm going to get caught. Yeah.
00:30:03
Yeah. That equation doesn't need to be in the mix. No. Okay. The woman was convicted of
00:30:10
concealment of death and obtaining property by false pretense, the social security fraud,
00:30:15
and was in jail for about a year and a half. I'm glad someone found the poor older woman
00:30:20
and she was able to be properly laid to rest, but maybe let's all agree to never buy a used deep freezer, I guess.
00:30:27
Stay sexy and don't unwittingly transport human remains. Buck, he, him. Buck, it is a fascinating story,
00:30:36
but I just can't imagine how that slips your mind. Like you've done something, you've done a thing that you know is wrong
00:30:44
and you're clearly doing it to do another thing, you know, to get those checks or whatever.
00:30:51
So it's like, keep track of your shit. And then, yeah, you do just that's such an odd like it's worse than just like, you know, bumbling criminal mistakes.
00:31:02
It's just like, are you trying to get caught? Well, clearly there's something going on there, but I will say maybe in North Carolina, not judging.
00:31:09
I love the place. Maybe you have multiple freezers in your garage, you know, like beer freezers and meat freezers.
00:31:17
And then if you go hunt deer is probably a thing. And so she just forgot which one.
00:31:22
no I don't think you can have that many freezers to forget no unless you have 22 freezers
00:31:28
which then we have a whole nother problem on on our list of problems is there it's just so
00:31:34
it's so extreme it's so like it feels to me like people going like la la la it not a problem forget it here just buy this and I sorry for saving it for last but here why I did that because if you want an uplifting fun one go over to the fan Look at me Go over to the fan cult And we have
00:31:52
one more story each to tell you. And there's like a couple of weeks back now, there's a ton of
00:31:56
videos. If you can't stop listening to our voices smattering at you, that's where to go.
00:32:03
Yes, we will see you on the mini mini. So if you're in the fan cult, and if not,
00:32:07
Stay sexy. And don't get murdered. Goodbye. Elvis, do you want a cookie? Cheap Caribbean summer savings event is here.
00:32:16
Right now, get $100 instant savings on vacation packages to Cancun, Jamaica, and the Dominican Republic.
00:32:22
Whether you're chasing poolside drinks, white sand beaches, or endless all-inclusive fun,
00:32:27
Cheap Caribbean helps you get more beach for less money. Book your summer vacay today at CheapCaribbean.com.
00:32:33
Goodbye. Bye. If audiobooks are your thing, or if you've been meaning to listen to more of them,
00:32:38
you should check out a podcast called Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club, hosted by Cal Penn.
00:32:44
Each episode spotlights standout audiobooks on Audible across all kinds of genres,
00:32:49
sci-fi, comedy, romance, thrillers, and more, with Cal talking to guests who help break down what makes each story worth listening to.
00:32:55
It's a fun, easy way to discover your next great audiobook. Check out Earsay on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
00:33:04
Goodbye. You know that fantasy where you run into your ex while looking impossibly cute and wildly unbothered?
00:33:10
Hill House makes the perfect dress for that moment. Or if you're just running errands.
00:33:15
Hill House Home is the brand behind the viral nap dress, known for its signature smocking, ultra flattering fit, and comfort that makes it a favorite for just about everyone.
00:33:24
Celebrities like Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo, Anne Hathaway, and Mindy Kaling have all been spotted in Hill House.
00:33:31
These dresses are the definition of versatile. perfect for running errands in the morning and stylish enough for dinner or a party that night
00:33:38
and it's not all they carry they started with bedding back in 2016 and now you'll find bath
00:33:43
robes pajamas children's clothes and maternity all with the cutest prints and it's so true the
00:33:48
hardest time picking out one nap dress because the prints are so dreamy and beautiful but now
00:33:53
that i have it i'm gonna wear it all day every day i'm gonna throw on my leather jacket at night
00:33:58
and look like a total badass cowboy boots or cute heels whatever it is this nap dress can
00:34:03
make it look classy. You look like that classy lady you see at the airport. Hill House makes fun
00:34:08
fashion that makes you feel good. Get 15% off your first order of $100 or more at hillhousehome.com
00:34:14
with code MURDER15. That's MURDER15 for 15% off at hillhousehome.com. Goodbye.

Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

  • 75
    Funniest
  • 70
    Most shocking
  • 70
    Most unserious (in a good way)
  • 70
    Biggest twist

Episode Highlights

  • Dr. Death the Cowboy
    A charming neurosurgeon leaves a trail of broken bodies instead of healing.
    “This is a story of greed, betrayal, and a fight for justice.”
    @ 00m 51s
    May 24, 2021
  • The Fruit-Eating Axe Man
    A bizarre series of break-ins leads to a brutal murder in Seattle.
    “How have we never heard of this?”
    @ 05m 36s
    May 24, 2021
  • Creepy Encounter
    A woman sees a man with an axe, leading to a chilling realization.
    “I walked past the axe murderer.”
    @ 06m 13s
    May 24, 2021
  • Home Invasion Scare
    A sister's gut feeling saves her from a potential home invasion.
    “My sister is the napping queen. Hashtag nap influencer.”
    @ 21m 33s
    May 24, 2021
  • Found Drugs Story
    A listener shares a wild tale of finding drugs in Italy, leading to unexpected hilarity.
    “Damn. If the motherfucker Italian gods didn't answer his prayers.”
    @ 25m 15s
    May 24, 2021
  • Deep Freezer Discovery
    A woman buys a freezer only to find a corpse inside, leading to shocking revelations.
    “She discovered the frozen corpse of the seller's mother.”
    @ 29m 30s
    May 24, 2021

Episode Quotes

  • He promised to heal them. Instead, he left a trail of broken bodies.
    MFM Minisode 228
  • An axe murderer in Seattle.
    MFM Minisode 228
  • That's amazing.
    MFM Minisode 228
  • It's my time to shine, bitches.
    MFM Minisode 228
  • Ask and you shall receive.
    MFM Minisode 228
  • Stay sexy and don't unwittingly transport human remains.
    MFM Minisode 228

Key Moments

  • Charming Neurosurgeon00:48
  • Greed and Betrayal00:51
  • Axe Murderer Sighted06:13
  • Creepy Encounter06:38
  • Home Invasion21:42
  • Creative Quarantine Project22:46
  • Unexpected Drug Find25:21
  • Creepy Freezer Story28:23

Tension Over Time

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown