00:00:00
This is exactly right. Isn't some far off concept? It's already here. Next starts now.
00:00:33
Hyundai, an official partner of FIFA. Goodbye. When a charming neurosurgeon rode into Frontier Town
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selling a persona of confidence and care, patients trusted him. He wore cowboy boots in the operating room
00:00:45
and became sought after by patients. He promised to heal them. Instead, he left a trail of broken bodies.
00:00:51
This is a story of greed, betrayal, and a fight for justice. Listen to Dr. Death the Cowboy wherever you get your podcasts
00:00:58
or binge the entire series right now only with Audible. Goodbye. Cheap Caribbean Summer Savings Event is here.
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00:01:22
Goodbye. My favorite murder Hello! And welcome. To My Favorite Murder. The mini-sode.
00:01:47
Hi. Mysteries. Mysteries and histories. I don't... You know that podcast, Mysteries and Histories?
00:01:56
It's this one. We just renamed the mini-sode. Actually, that's not bad. It's kind of good.
00:02:02
Do you have a mystery or a history that you want to read? I think I have both. Let's do it.
00:02:08
Let's jump in. Do you want me to start? Yeah. Tell me a mystery or history. Check out this mystery history.
00:02:15
The subject line is, my dad's career as a bookie and professional gambler. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
00:02:23
It's an inverted mystery, which is a declaration of the truth. Hey, y'all. This takes place 40 miles south of Boston in the 1960s through 2011. My dad,
00:02:33
and then in parentheses, it says stepdad. I love that. Was a real standup guy. He married my mom
00:02:40
in 1967 when I was four. My sperm donor father wanted nothing to do with my mom and I. And then
00:02:46
in parentheses, it says loser. Yeah, for sure. In 1975, when I was 12 and in school, we were all to
00:02:53
write a paper about what our dads did for a living. So at home, I asked questions and was
00:02:58
told by my mom, your dad is an accountant, which was boring. So he was not picked to talk to our
00:03:03
class on career day. At our house, once a week, his friend Joey dropped off a money-sized brick
00:03:08
wrapped up with an elastic in a brown lunch bag. And Joey would tell me, leave this on your dad's
00:03:13
desk. I can't, I can't really do a Boston accent. Yeah. Or like a mobster's accent.
00:03:19
Leave this. Leave this. You want to do it? You got it. No, you had it. Leave this on your dad's desk.
00:03:24
There you go. But that was, what's dad's? I don't know why I put that spice on it.
00:03:29
Can you try a Boston accent real quick? Hey, leave this on your dad's desk. That's my own accent.
00:03:37
I can't do it. That was Irvine all the way. How would Ben Affleck do it? Think of it that way.
00:03:45
I don't know. At the time, I never questioned it. During football season and other sporting events,
00:03:50
my dad would have to, in quotes, do the phone. in his office, no matter if it was Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, you name it. Dad,
00:03:58
in quotes, doing the phone was a priority. We also went to the dog track. And then in parentheses,
00:04:04
it says greyhound racing on a daily basis. I woke up. Yeah, they're just living at the dog track.
00:04:11
You know how accountants do? This is my favorite sentence maybe of any hometown we've ever gotten.
00:04:19
I woke up one night to my parents screaming with delight as my father threw handfuls upon handfuls of cash in the air.
00:04:25
And then parentheses, it says, like money booth. My mother always had a new car,
00:04:32
while my dad always drove an older used car, and us kids never wanted for anything.
00:04:38
For my mom's birthday one year, there was literally a new car in our driveway with a giant red bow on the roof.
00:04:44
He was a really good man. In 69, my younger sister was born with profound physical and mental disabilities
00:04:51
and required a lot of care. When other men might flee, he was always there. Family always came first.
00:04:57
He often cooked dinner to help my mom, and we always ate as a family. He died in 2011 after fighting aggressive lung cancer.
00:05:06
At his funeral, his friend Joey told me that my dad and he were, quote, once at a meeting with Whitey Bulger, an associate.
00:05:13
it. My mom showed me copies of his tax returns and his listed occupation really was professional
00:05:21
gambler. Wow. I also have a younger brother who has an even more colorful and illegal career,
00:05:28
but that's a story for another time. Georgia and Karen, I've been a fan since the beginning.
00:05:34
Thank you for being our strong voice when it comes to mental illness, women's issues,
00:05:38
and representing those who often go overlooked. Respectfully, Kim. Kim, thank you.
00:05:45
Kim, we kicked it off with a fucking, a salute to Kim's dad. Yeah. She didn't say his name.
00:05:52
Stepdad is his name. But best dad best bookie dad Love it Come on great job This is called I will never give up on this story so you might as well give it a go
00:06:07
It just starts. It's 2023. Who the fuck on earth has a witty greeting left in the tank?
00:06:13
This is a meet cute slash coincidence story. Let's get into it. The year, 1970 fucking two. The place, Santa Cruz, California.
00:06:21
The specific location, an outpatient group home for children on the autism spectrum.
00:06:26
I know, not necessarily a storybook setting for love, but just wait. My mom, Nancy, was a recent college graduate.
00:06:33
She was about to start her first real adult job at this clinic where she had volunteered
00:06:37
during college except for the one semester when she'd studied abroad. She also had a friend, let's call her Kathy, who kept bugging my mom to come see her boyfriend's
00:06:45
band play. My mom, having sat through more than her fill of long nights of mandatory listening to mediocre dude bands.
00:06:52
Hi, what's up? Hi, I lived it. Then there. Always made an excuse not to go. Cut to my dad, Gary, also a recent graduate of the same college.
00:07:03
As it sometimes happens, my dad was struggling to find his path in life. And then in all caps says, sing it, dad.
00:07:10
He was still in a mediumly happy long distance relationship with his high school sweetheart, Connie.
00:07:15
and then it says, notice I'm using all the names per your request. Yes. Who lived in Denver.
00:07:22
His gut told him that it was time to end the relationship and move on. He felt that his heart was in California
00:07:26
and he wanted to stay. But after searching for work unsuccessfully all summer, his practical mind told him
00:07:32
his only real option was to get real, cut his losses, move to Denver and find a mediumly happy job and marry Connie.
00:07:40
So subtle. My dad literally packed up his entire apartment through a raging going away party for himself
00:07:46
where his band played, see where I'm going with this? Yes. Uh-huh, and said his goodbyes.
00:07:52
The morning came for him to leave and he loaded up his car to get on the road to his new life in Denver.
00:07:57
He was fighting back tears as he got ready to go that morning and later said that every bone in his body
00:08:02
told him he was supposed to stay, but he didn't know how to make that work. On his drive towards the highway,
00:08:07
he decided to make one last stop and say goodbye to the beach, a place he loved and spent a lot of time.
00:08:13
After shedding a few tears, he was trudging back up the hill towards his car when he spotted a payphone.
00:08:19
Suddenly it occurred to him that he should call his old boss from the great college internship he'd had one semester
00:08:24
just to say goodbye and thank you. He thought to himself, if I have a dime in my pocket,
00:08:29
and then it says, yes, it literally cost one dime to make a phone call in 1972, what even is time?
00:08:34
Then I'll call her. He reached into his pocket and found one dime. So he called.
00:08:40
His boss, Joyce, happened to pick up a minor miracle in and of itself in those days of no cell phones
00:08:45
or answering machines. She was thrilled to hear from my dad. She said she'd been trying to contact him for weeks,
00:08:51
but hadn't been able to get a hold of him. My dad didn't have a phone at his apartment.
00:08:56
The 70s sound like a real confusing time. It was just, there was a lot less communication.
00:09:02
Yeah. And I have to say, I don't know if it was worse or better. It's hard to say.
00:09:07
I agree. Like we should have just stopped at the little cassette fucking, what's it called?
00:09:12
Answering machine? Answering machine. Yeah. Should have stopped there. Yep. She was hoping that he'd consider accepting the new job
00:09:19
that had just opened up because he'd done such a great job during his internship.
00:09:22
Fuck. Even though his car was packed up with all of his belongings, he'd moved out of his apartment
00:09:27
and his girlfriend was waiting for him in Denver. My dad gratefully blurted out,
00:09:31
yes, poor Denise. Was it Denise? Connie? Connie. Connie, poor Connie. You guessed it.
00:09:37
The job was at the autistic clinic where my mom worked. Oh. Although my parents went to the same school
00:09:43
and knew many of the same people they'd never managed to meet. My mom was studying abroad the one semester
00:09:48
when my dad worked at her clinic. And it turned out that he was also in the band
00:09:52
that she severally, and then it says wisely, refused to go see. But finally, fate stepped in and brought them together.
00:09:59
All these chances to meet it didn't happen. Wow. And like last fucking string of his teeth stayed.
00:10:07
And like he's on the beat. Okay, it's just, I love this. Crazy. And also it's like, trust your gut.
00:10:13
Yes. Yes. Good Lord. On my dad's first day of work, he was assigned to shadow my mom.
00:10:18
They had a tough day working with the kids. And at the end of the day, my dad gave my mom a huge hug and a grateful thank you.
00:10:24
My mom says she somehow instantly knew in that moment that she'd found her person.
00:10:29
Many decades of a loving marriage and two kids and two grandkids later, I'd say that's true.
00:10:35
My parents' devotion to each other has been an incredible demonstration for me and my sister
00:10:39
of what it means to be kind, patient, and brave. And as my dad always says, it was all because he had a dime in his pocket.
00:10:48
Bittersweet update, because obviously I've written this in before with no luck. After a brutal 20-year battle with Parkinson's disease,
00:10:55
my dad passed away in June of 2020, literally on Father's Day, just as an extra fuck you from the universe.
00:11:02
We miss him dearly every day, full stop, but slash and he and my mom were devoted to each other
00:11:09
until the end. The memory of my dad's courageous choice to follow his instincts inspires me every day
00:11:14
and I try to be as brave and open as he was in that moment. Stay sexy and always carry lots of spare change.
00:11:20
Corrine, she, her. Corrine. Always carry lots of spare change from machines that literally don't exist anymore.
00:11:28
Totally. Oh, Corrine, you're so lucky to have parents that found each other and were in love the entire time
00:11:37
they were married. absolutely devoted to each other. Well, as a person who actually did have parents
00:11:43
who loved each other very much the whole time, it's a very lucky thing. And also, well, it's just a very rare thing.
00:11:49
It's hard. It is. I know they didn't love each other every single day the same way,
00:11:54
but then they talk about it and make jokes about how you know they were a good example of how to how to stick through it Yeah
00:12:05
If you spend all day waiting to take your bra off, it might be time for third love.
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00:13:05
Goodbye. While the world watches the stars at the FIFA World Cup this summer, Hyundai has its eyes on the next generation of talent. The future soccer stars who are already
00:13:15
turning heads at age 14. Making plays that end up on everyone's feed, scoring from angles that don't
00:13:20
make sense, rewriting record books that barely had time to gather dust. Because Next doesn't wait for
00:13:25
an invitation and Hyundai doesn't either. Hyundai has always moved the future within reach. Hyundai
00:13:30
did it by making advanced safety standard on every vehicle. Hyundai did it by engineering EVs with
00:13:35
ultra fast charging capability. And Hyundai continues doing it every day. From robotics that
00:13:40
change how people live to young athletes changing the game, the future isn't some far-off concept.
00:13:45
It's already here. Next starts now. Hyundai, an official partner of FIFA. Goodbye.
00:13:51
If you're always on the lookout for a great audiobook or just want help figuring out what
00:13:55
to listen to next, there's a podcast you should know about. It's called Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club, hosted by Cal Penn.
00:14:02
Each episode takes a closer look at some of the most talked-about new audiobooks on Audible,
00:14:06
spanning a wide range of genres from sci-fi and literary fiction to rom-coms, thrillers, and comedy.
00:14:12
Cal is joined by guests who dig into what these stories are about, what makes them stand out as audiobooks, and why they're connecting with listeners right now.
00:14:19
If you're looking for your next listen, this is a great place to start. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club, on the iHeartRadio app,
00:14:26
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Goodbye. Well, you know what? I'm switching mine then because I picked a different one,
00:14:34
but now I think I need to read this one. Okay. Okay. And the subject line is all the things you like and the hooray you need.
00:14:41
And it just starts, hi, wonderfuls. Long time listener, first time caller. Figured we all needed to hear about some happiness right about now.
00:14:50
You asked for coincidences. So here you go. What's funny is we don't know when this email came in,
00:14:57
but it always applies in this fucking world we live in right now. Thank God for Gen Z.
00:15:05
Okay. Back in 2011, my boyfriend and I moved up to New York from Georgia. Georgia.
00:15:11
Hey. We were together for four years, but we were young and I wanted to be free and drink my way through all of NYC.
00:15:20
So we broke up when he went to medical school. For eight years, I partied and online dated through the wealth of NYC men.
00:15:27
And then in parentheses, it says, as terrible as you can imagine. And we only kept in contact here and there via short texts.
00:15:35
Fast forward to 2021. So it's 10 years later. And I was walking down the street wearing my ex-boyfriend's Iron Maiden t-shirt from a concert we went to together.
00:15:45
And I just decided to become sober. After my mother ended up in the hospital for about the third time from majorly injuring herself from drinking,
00:15:54
and I had a terrible fight with my family, I needed someone to talk to. I needed someone that knew me from my Georgia life and someone that knew me from my New York life.
00:16:03
and there he was walking towards me, my ex-boyfriend from eight years ago and I was wearing his t-shirt.
00:16:13
Not only that, but he and his new girlfriend had just moved across the street. He was now my neighbor.
00:16:21
I was even friends with his super. I cried as I realized that I had strangely been asking for this
00:16:27
and then a parenthesis says, even though I was looking like shit. We started hanging out on the weekends
00:16:34
and he greatly supported me during my early days of sobriety, going to dinners, art museums,
00:16:39
and showing me once again that I could have fun without substances. No, I did not become the other girl,
00:16:45
but I was there for him right when things got particularly ugly with a new girlfriend.
00:16:50
We now like to say that we came into each other's lives right when we needed it and have been dating again for about a year.
00:16:58
SSDGM, and be careful what you wish for. And then a parenthesis that says, or just keep all of your ex's things, Jackie, she, her.
00:17:07
Oh, fate. Right? Yeah. I like that we can share for her because she didn't break up another person's relationship.
00:17:14
That broke up on its own. So it's fine. That's right. And it's hard because I think there are those bonds.
00:17:20
Like that is obviously always a challenge where it's like when someone has a serious bond and it's like an old girlfriend, a first girlfriend, that kind of thing.
00:17:30
Totally. Like you knew me, you're the only person who knew me from that life before this one,
00:17:34
that kind of thing. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, sweet. Okay. This is called The First Time I Hitchhiked.
00:17:40
Oh. Uh-huh. Hello, all. I would go on and on, but let's just say you all are amazing and I love you.
00:17:47
Now buckle up. Nothing to do with murder, but it's a great story anyway. It was the summer of 1996 and I had just graduated from high school I grew up in a little bitty town in Wyoming that was just over the border from Utah Now when I say small town I mean small The closest place to shop or eat at a restaurant that was not fast food is a 63 drive to Park City Utah
00:18:09
Jesus. And between my town and Park City, there's almost nothing, just the great wide open.
00:18:16
It was late July. My best friend, let's call her Emily, and I decided to ride down to Park City to
00:18:21
do a little shopping. Emily was driving. She had an adorable Honda CRX and we felt so grown up going
00:18:27
on this excursion without our parents. We spent the day shopping in the outlet mall and grabbed
00:18:32
a quick bite to eat before heading back towards Wyoming. As we cruised along the I-80, no, it just
00:18:38
says I-80, but I'm from California. As we cruised along I-80, we had the windows rolled down and
00:18:44
music blasting, sun shining and feeling so free without a care in the world. About 20 miles out
00:18:51
of Park City, the car suddenly dies. We floated over to the shoulder of the road and parked.
00:18:56
It's that moment when you're trying to brainstorm what could be wrong with your car, but you know
00:19:00
that you had no idea. I suddenly wish that we had my mom with us. Oh, sweet baby angel. Now,
00:19:06
this is before cell phones. And even if there were cell phones, I doubt they would have worked
00:19:10
in this area even today. We debated what to do next. We could wait in the car until we didn't
00:19:16
know what? We could start walking to the next exit that had a gas station about five miles down the
00:19:21
road. That seemed like the best option. We put on the hazard lights and got out and started walking.
00:19:26
It's late July and extremely hot. We had walked for about a mile when an older man pulled over
00:19:31
in an even older car. He asked us if he wanted a ride. Now, don't judge. We were young and naive.
00:19:37
It was the 90s. We were really overheating from the sun. We were pretty scared about walking on
00:19:42
the shoulder of a very busy freeway. There were a lot of things racing through my mind, but my main
00:19:46
thought was that I was supposed to be home soon and my mother wouldn't know where I was.
00:19:50
Yes, even as an 18-year-old, I was more concerned about being late and getting in trouble than
00:19:55
getting in a car with a total stranger. Sorry, but just the heat alone, I would have gotten into
00:20:01
that car. Absolutely. I'm not good at heat. Yeah, walking in the sun, like knowing you're like,
00:20:07
oh, we got five miles ahead of us, that I would have, oh. You can feel the heat of the asphalt
00:20:12
through your shoes. Like that's just, oh. The sunburn would have started immediately on me.
00:20:17
Because you know they're not wearing SPF. It's the 90s. Yeah, that's right. So we get in.
00:20:22
Emily and I were terrified visibly. We sat together in the front bucket seat sharing a seatbelt.
00:20:28
We thought that would be safer. Crying. This man didn't say a word about us sharing a seat or our crying.
00:20:34
He just drove us down the freeway to the next exit and pulled into a gas station parking lot.
00:20:39
We got out visibly relieved and said thank you. He said it was no problem, but then he said,
00:20:44
you girls should not be getting into cars with strangers. That could have turned out differently.
00:20:49
And then he drove away. And that man was Ted Bundy. Shit. Emily and I were shaken, but feeling pretty good that we had survived.
00:20:58
We entered the gas station to call her dad. We found the payphone, oh, the 90s, scraped together enough change from our wallets
00:21:04
and made a long distance call to her dad's office. We explained the situation. Her dad said he would call a tow truck to pick us up
00:21:11
and we would go get the car. He would start on his way from Wyoming and meet us at the gas station after we got the car.
00:21:16
Okay. When the tow truck arrived, we got in with the driver. Again, no thought to this being a stranger who could now take us anywhere.
00:21:24
Oh, the innocence. We chatted with the driver and started to explain where the car had broken down.
00:21:29
As we approached the area of the car, I told him, it's just past that bridge. And he replied, where all the fire trucks are?
00:21:36
As he slowed down on the opposite side of the freeway, we saw two fire trucks, two ambulances, and at least three highway patrol cars in the area around her car.
00:21:46
The tow truck driver crossed over the median to the side of the frio with Emily's car and
00:21:50
approached the emergency vehicles. When we exited the truck, an officer asked what we were doing,
00:21:55
and Emily said, where's my car? As we looked, we saw Emily's car smashed to pieces in a gully
00:22:02
about 100 feet off the road. Oh, fuck. There was a second car that had obviously hit Emily's,
00:22:08
but it looked much less damaged down in the ditch as well. The ambulance was loading a woman from the second car onto a gurney.
00:22:16
She was crying and kept saying, I fell asleep. I fell asleep. Was anyone hurt? But perhaps the most horrifying part
00:22:23
was that all of the other emergency response people and officers were fanned out in the gully and surrounding area
00:22:28
in a clear search pattern looking for our bodies. The emergency responders assumed that the car had been occupied
00:22:36
and we're looking for bodies from the car. Oh my God. We explained who we were and what happened
00:22:42
and the much relieved emergency responders came up to speak with us. As far as I know,
00:22:47
the woman from the other vehicle was okay. I often wondered what would have happened
00:22:51
if we had stayed in the car or not hitchhiked with that stranger. Mm-hmm. It's chilling to think that we had probably
00:22:58
just missed being smashed in that car by only about five or 10 minutes. And what are the chances that someone would fall asleep
00:23:05
and the exact location of Emily's car. So fucking weird. So crazy. Then when listening to episode 329 of your podcast,
00:23:12
I realized almost 30 years later that this was the time that the great Basin serial killer was in this area
00:23:18
killing young women. Probably young women that he picked up on the side of the road.
00:23:24
Oh, fuck. Something I did, I hadn't read this part. Something I did not know about
00:23:28
until listening to your show. Wow, that really could have been different. We are so lucky that it was just a nice gentleman
00:23:33
who wanted to help us out who stopped for us that day. Yeah. Well, that's my story.
00:23:38
Sorry it was so long. Thank you, lovely ladies, for all that you do. You mean more than I can say.
00:23:43
Stay sexy and don't hitchhike unless absolutely necessary, question mark. Love, Jen.
00:23:50
Jen, that's almost like one of those like philosophical questions where it's like, do you pick this?
00:23:57
Do you sit in a car on the side of the freeway? Yeah. And wait, or do you take action?
00:24:02
I will say if you ever have to pull over on the side of the road, always keep your,
00:24:07
and you have to stay in your car, always keep your seatbelt on. Oh. I learned that a long time ago
00:24:11
from an accident I heard about, but keep your seatbelt on when you're like, if you're waiting for a tow truck or whatever.
00:24:16
But try not to pull over on the freeway ever. Yeah. Roll your ass onto a freeway exit.
00:24:22
It's better to fuck up your rims than it is to pull over on the freeway. That's right.
00:24:27
You know, when you're, if you have a flat or whatever. That reminds me of that night
00:24:30
that I ran over that piece of plastic when you and Vince and I were coming home from somewhere.
00:24:34
That was fucking insane. And I was screaming at you guys not to pull over and neither of you would listen to me.
00:24:41
I know. It's true. I was just like, what did I just hit? And then it was like, in my mind,
00:24:48
it was going to drag and then catch on fire and blow us up. Yeah, it was definitely dragging.
00:24:53
There's a lot of minuses for that one. Thank God Vince was there. Can you imagine if it was just you and I?
00:24:58
Oh, no. Just immediately, it's all screaming in the car. Yeah. While the world watches the stars at the FIFA World Cup this summer,
00:25:08
Hyundai has its eyes on the next generation of talent. The future soccer stars who are already turning heads at age 14.
00:25:13
Making plays that end up on everyone's feed, scoring from angles that don't make sense,
00:25:18
rewriting record books that barely had time to gather dust. Because Next doesn't wait for an invitation, and Hyundai doesn't either.
00:25:24
Hyundai has always moved the future within reach. Hyundai did it by making advanced safety standard on every vehicle.
00:25:30
Hyundai did it by engineering EVs with ultra-fast charging capability. And Hyundai continues doing it every day.
00:25:36
From robotics that change how people live to young athletes changing the game, the future isn't some far-off concept. It's already here.
00:25:43
Next starts now. Hyundai, an official partner of FIFA. Goodbye. If you're always on the lookout for a great audiobook or just want help figuring out what to listen to next,
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there's a podcast you should know about. It's called Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club, hosted by Cal Penn.
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Each episode takes a closer look at some of the most talked about new audiobooks on Audible,
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spanning a wide range of genres from sci-fi and literary fiction to rom-coms, thrillers, and comedy.
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Cal is joined by guests who dig into what these stories are about, what makes them stand out as audiobooks, and why they're connecting with listeners right now.
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If you're looking for your next listen, this is a great place to start. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club, on the iHeartRadio app,
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Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Goodbye. Pandora Jewelry brings the sparkle to summer, now with even better prices.
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Okay. Hey, y'all, write to it. In 2002, I was in the second grade in a small elementary school in the rural South.
00:26:59
My mom was queen of that elementary school PTO, which is the parent-teacher organization.
00:27:04
And when they decided to host a magazine sales fundraiser, she was all period over period it, period.
00:27:12
Why was she so obsessed with this fundraiser, you ask? Because the student with the top sales per grade got to enter a money booth Oh shit Yes For children She shamelessly peddled Real Simple and Southern Home and Garden for weeks
00:27:30
and finally it was announced. I, parentheses, she had won. Her mom won the magazine drive for her
00:27:41
because she loved that prize so much. Not fair. It's how that shit is rigged when you're growing up
00:27:48
and you have a mom that works and a mom that doesn't, can't participate in shit like that.
00:27:53
And you watch those like super helicopter parents that get in there and they're just like,
00:27:58
oh, that's crazy. Leanne won. And you're just like, fuck you. Anyway. Got it. I was small for my age.
00:28:06
Three and a half feet tall in second grade to put it into perspective. That's crazy.
00:28:11
I don't know what that means. I mean, it's truly tiny. It's tiny, tiny. Okay. But I was coming to win.
00:28:17
Oh, so the tiny baby is going into the money booth. That's so cute. I was coming to win.
00:28:24
My mom and I decided the following strategy. I would throw myself onto the floor of the booth,
00:28:29
trapping bills below my body. Then I would take them down the neck of a men's large sweatshirt
00:28:37
she bought me at the local Walmart. Oh my God, Mom. It was large to give me more space for cash.
00:28:46
Yeah. We know. You don't have to explain that to us. Cut to the day of the money booth.
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I am pumped. We were in the very 1990s gym. You can smell it, 90s kids. And I am called over to enter the booth.
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I stood confidently in the booth and threw my 40-pound tiny body over as much cash as possible.
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Our careful preparation ending up working, and I caught $75. Holy shit. Yes. I was a high roller.
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And when I got home, I asked my mom to take me to the grocery store so I could treat my sister to kid cuisine.
00:29:18
Aw. I know. The rest of that money sustained my kid self for almost a year. Here's what's amazing.
00:29:25
That mom busted ass and then let her kid keep that money. Totally. It wasn't some sort of like,
00:29:32
and now you're going to buy the groceries for the next couple months. That's what I was expecting.
00:29:37
So it sustained my kid self for almost a year. I even got to purchase a set of blow pens with my winnings at the local Toys R Us.
00:29:44
I don't know what that is. I don't either. Blow pens. Is that when you had those little straws
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and you put some like almost like this gum at the end of it and you can blow them up
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and she got really lightheaded and dizzy? I can't imagine they sell those anymore.
00:29:56
Oh, those were like those plastic balloons? Yeah. Remember those? And they smelled like glue.
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We were basically huffing glue. You were like absolutely huffing glue on those. I wonder if that's what she means.
00:30:07
I think it's a thing that's like you blow colors. Yeah, I think you're right. out onto paper, but not sure. Okay. 90s kids, let us know. Yeah. Long live the early 2000s and long
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live small towns where there's truly nothing to do. Anyway, that's it. Stay sexy and always ask
00:30:27
your competitive mom to help you with your money booth strategy. Madison, she, her.
00:30:34
Good one, Madison. Nice. Nice job. And congratulations. I mean, if you're listening
00:30:40
and you have a, you should, at your next family event holiday slash holiday slash whatever birthday party please ask crowds of people has anyone here been in a money booth You need to be our on the ground investigative journalist
00:30:55
and find these money booth stories because people have been in them. Yeah. Eyes and ears, guys. We need you.
00:31:01
Please do your homework. Okay. This is called STEM. Shenanigans, tomfoolery, escapades, and mischief.
00:31:08
I know how you love a good grandma, prank, or ghost story. Well, hold on to your butts
00:31:14
because I have a three in one. My grandma, Wilma or Willie, was known to have a mischievous streak,
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especially after raising six kids and countless grandkids. She was never above a practical joke.
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One time she forgot the sugar in her famous lemon pie and casually watched as my mom grabbed a piece
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and took a giant bite. But this isn't that story. In our small town, my grandma used to love walking around and planting flowers,
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some of which are still present around town today, despite her passing in the 90s.
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When I would visit, we would sometimes take a nice afternoon walk. One afternoon when I was young,
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our casual stroll led us past the local cemetery. Grandma told me a story of a traveling salesman
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who suddenly passed away in our town in the late 1800s, leaving only his satchel full of samples behind.
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Well, the story goes that no one knew how to reach his family about his passing,
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So he was buried in our local cemetery. A local sculptor moved by this man who died alone
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didn't want the stranger's grave to go unmarked. So he carved a realistic stone version of his suitcase
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to serve as his tombstone. Fortunately, the sculptor was much better at art than spelling.
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So the monument reads, here's where he stopped last, misspelling the word stopped.
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So there's only one P in stopped. Grandma told us that this misspelling outraged the man's ghost
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and he would haunt the area surrounding the cemetery looking for the person who botched his headstone.
00:32:41
In fact, there's a keyhole in the top of the suitcase tombstone. And if you yell, hey, what are you doing down there?
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Into the keyhole, you can hear him say nothing. Of course, being young, gullible
00:32:54
and not one to shy away from a ghost story, I decided to try it. I yelled into the keyhole and waited for my answer.
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Then it dawned on me. My grandma was behind me giggling the whole time. Well, what did he say?
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She asked. Nothing, I said. In a somewhat disappointed tone, she got me. In reality, the man's name was James S. Jacobs
00:33:16
and his death was neither suspicious nor mysterious. He lived in our town. He died in his home after a short illness in 1891
00:33:24
and was buried near his family who did not believe in putting up headstones. His family's graves are nearby but unmarked
00:33:32
and his father is the one who commissioned the monument for his son. The tombstone has actually been featured
00:33:37
in Ripley's Believe It or Not, multiple books and travel guides. Stay sexy and prank your grandkids
00:33:43
into learning how to spell Amanda. And then she included a picture of the grave.
00:33:49
Oh. Wow. Because, so sorry, the grandma was lying entirely about the whole thing.
00:33:55
She made the entire story up. The entire story up and then the nothing. See, we've talked about this before.
00:34:02
in my mind and in my world, that is an expression of love Somebody takes the time to prank you to think it through to be like you can see that grandma driving around by herself coming up with that and being like this is going to be great
00:34:18
It's like teaching your kid how to use their imagination, but also not to get tricked.
00:34:22
Yes. To bolo in life, you know, be on the lookout. Yeah. Please bolo, children. Bolo.
00:34:30
Always. Oh, that was it, right? That's our last one. That's it. Yeah. A delightful packet of stories there.
00:34:36
Yeah. Thanks for writing in, everyone. I appreciate your histories and your mysteries.
00:34:42
Oh my God, what a mysterious and historical minisode this has been. Truly. Stay sexy.
00:34:48
And don't get murdered. Goodbye. Elvis, do you want a cookie? This has been an Exactly Right production.
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Our producer is Alejandra Keck. And this episode was engineered and mixed by Stephen Ray Morris.
00:35:08
Stephen! Email your hometowns and fucking hoorays to myfavoritemurder at gmail.com.
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Follow the show on Instagram and Facebook at My Favorite Murder and Twitter at My Fave Murder.
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Goodbye.