Search Captions & Ask AI

MFM Minisode 345

August 14, 2023 /

This episode features Halloween stories, first responder experiences, and family memories. Guests share personal anecdotes about choking incidents and found treasures.

One story recounts a Halloween night when a retired firefighter saved his family from choking. The father performed the Heimlich maneuver on both his wife and daughter, showcasing his calmness under pressure.

Another guest shares a tale about finding her late mother's wedding rings after a heart attack. A vivid dream guided her to the hidden location, emphasizing the bond between mother and daughter.

Additionally, a listener narrates her father's near-death experience with a water vortex while water skiing, highlighting his quick thinking and survival instincts.

These stories illustrate the importance of family, the unexpected challenges of life, and the humorous aspects of Halloween traditions.

TLDR

Listeners share Halloween choking incidents and a mother's hidden treasure story, showcasing family bonds and survival instincts.

Episode

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Just try it. Hello. And welcome to my favorite murder. The mini-sode. That's right. That's correct.
00:02:07
That's you've never been more right in your life. Nope. That is affirmative. Good job pressing play.
00:02:14
We're gonna make you happy you press play. We're gonna make it worth your while. You want to go
00:02:18
First, you want me to go first? Go for it. Okay. This one's called First Responder Trick or Treat Story.
00:02:26
Hi, ladies and all known associates. Let me tell you the story of one of the craziest Halloween nights of my dad's life.
00:02:34
He's a retired firefighter from Colorado and just the best guy I know. Of all the things he has seen and done in his career, this particular day must have been one of the more stressful days of his life,
00:02:45
as he had to save my mom, my sister, and myself from choking all in one day. What? Yes.
00:02:53
I was probably about six and my sister was eight on this particular Halloween. It all started at lunch and my mom choked on a tomato in the salad she was eating.
00:03:01
We were all at the kitchen table and my dad calmly got up and came over and gave her the
00:03:06
Heimlich maneuver and saved her from peril. We were all a little freaked out, but went about
00:03:11
our lunch as if it hadn't happened. We then all got ready to go trick-or-treating later in the
00:03:16
evening. I think my sister and I were clowns this year. Before we went out to solicit the
00:03:21
neighborhood for candy, we decided on a dinner of leftover pizza. My sister is a freak and likes to
00:03:27
heat hers up in the microwave. So do I. Do you? I like it a little mushy the second day. Is that
00:03:35
weird? No, no. I think it's pretty common, but I do like to take the time to do in the oven because
00:03:40
and it crisps up any kind of questionable area. It does do that. Okay. What do you like to do, listener?
00:03:47
Let's get the vote going on social media and really let everybody weigh in. If she had eaten it cold like a normal person,
00:03:54
we could have avoided the next disaster. The pizza was some bargain chain variety
00:04:00
and the cheese became extremely stretchy and weird in the microwave. When she went to eat it,
00:04:05
she choked on the plasticky stringy cheese. Thank God for my superhero dad who reached into her mouth and grabbed a stringy cheese from the back of her throat, saving her
00:04:14
life. It was highly dramatic and scary. We all regrouped and decided to hit the streets for some
00:04:20
Halloween fun. When we got home from our trick or treat trip, my sister and I dumped out our candy
00:04:25
buckets to take a look at all the goods and decide which five pieces we wanted to have before bed.
00:04:30
Now it was my turn to make a weird choice. For one of my pieces of candy, I decided on a root
00:04:36
beer flavored hard candy. Root beer barrels. That's right. It has a barrel shape and was the
00:04:42
exact size of a six-year-old's esophagus. I love those candies. They're so good. Those are good
00:04:48
ones. Those are good ones. So I accidentally swallow it as soon as I put it in my mouth and
00:04:53
begin to choke. Here comes my father, the choking savior. He calmly laid me flat on the living room
00:04:59
floor on my stomach, found a spot he was looking for on my back and gave me a forceful smack with
00:05:03
his hand. Out popped the barrel and sweet relief, I could breathe again. After that, he looked at the
00:05:09
three of us and just said, that's it. Nobody eats anything the rest of tonight. You're all going to
00:05:14
bed. Including the mom. I don't know how he stayed as calm as he did while we were all trying to
00:05:22
choke to death in front of him on one day, but I know we wouldn't be here without his level head.
00:05:26
He's the best person and I'm so proud of his 30 year career as a first responder.
00:05:30
Hope you all enjoyed that crazy Halloween story, Miriam. What a great name. That's my middle name.
00:05:37
That's right. That's your grandma's name, right? No, just a random fucking name.
00:05:42
Full credit to you then and no credit to your grandma. But also, I think that's the thing no one understands about first responders is that
00:05:52
three choking family members in one day is small potatoes compared to what they actually deal with when they show up somewhere and someone house is on fire and there people inside or someone having a heart
00:06:05
attack or just had a heart. I mean, like, yeah, that's the thing is my dad would come home from the firehouse and
00:06:11
he would need to take a nap because he they would do runs in the middle of the night.
00:06:16
So he didn't get a full night's sleep and he'd get really mad if you woke him up like
00:06:20
you had to really tiptoe around. but he would also nap on the front room couch so it's like come on thanks work with us a little bit
00:06:27
but also I have the like memory of a gnat so I would be quiet for four minutes and then I'd be
00:06:34
Laura you took my thing whatever but like I was like god why does dad get so mad when he wakes us
00:06:41
up and then my mom one time was just like because they had to pull a family out of a house last
00:06:46
night and then I just went oh my god oh that's right my dad's not going to an office and sitting
00:06:50
in a chair. They really go through serious shit. Like emotional ups and downs and fucking constant
00:06:57
shit. So no wonder he was ready three times to fucking un-choke these people. Yeah. He's just
00:07:02
like, oh, this again. He knew exactly how much time he had before that root beer barrel was,
00:07:08
you know, I mean, that's so crazy. But also I feel like after the second choking,
00:07:14
that's when you have the family meeting and start threatening people like one more choking and I'm
00:07:19
not saving you yes everyone needs to slow down now this is the rule halloween is the day i would
00:07:25
definitely choke though because what an exciting day for for eating truly okay this one's great
00:07:33
um i'm not going to read you the subject line it just starts writing is not my strong suit so
00:07:39
thanks for taking the time to read this i've been listening to your show since it first dropped and
00:07:44
I've wanted to share my family murder story that I learned way too young. I'm sure it contributed
00:07:50
to my fascination with everything true crime. Well, that and the fact that my mom let me fall
00:07:54
asleep to unsolved mysteries as a six-year-old. Oh my God. Hell yeah. Six. So soothing. Robert
00:08:02
Stack telling you about missing children. The dulcet tones of Robert Stack asking you to please
00:08:09
call in. I remember the first time I heard the theme song, like after the internet had come out,
00:08:15
like years after I had actually watched the show and the chills it immediately gave me like 10 years
00:08:21
later were just as fucking hardcore as when I used to watch it. Because I think the genius of
00:08:27
that show and maybe what we all learned from that show to do for podcasting is they were talking
00:08:32
directly to the audience. Yeah. Maybe you can help solve a mystery. Do you know a man who had a
00:08:38
yellow van that he left on the side of the road where it's like, I know who this is.
00:08:42
Is that our neighbor? It's our neighbor. Oh God, I wished. I wished. So exciting.
00:08:47
Yeah. The dream of like, could you imagine if you could go to school in like sixth grade and
00:08:51
be like, guys, I called in and solved an unsolved mystery last night. Oh, truly.
00:08:56
There's the script. There's the script we've been waiting to write. Okay. Sorry.
00:09:02
We've completely sidebar this thing. My fault. Yeah, go. No. Anyhow, let's begin.
00:09:08
My great aunt Suzanne married a real asshole. Kenneth was an abusive SOB. Funny side note, Suzanne and my grandma Sandra had a double wedding.
00:09:17
This was probably an attempt on my great grandmother, a Polish immigrant, to save money.
00:09:22
Fortunately, for our side of the family, Grandma Sandra picked better men than her little sister.
00:09:28
Just like really get a chance to, I was going to say slum Suzanne. I've never seen Suzanne spelled with an O before.
00:09:37
No, I've never heard it that way before. Sandra and Suzanne. Okay, anyway. Suzanne eventually divorced Kenneth and did everything she could to get this awful man out of her and their children's lives.
00:09:48
As many obsessive and violent people do, he couldn't let go. His plan was to get rid of her because of an impending court proceeding.
00:09:56
So he did what people did back in the 60s. He took out an ad in the classifieds.
00:10:01
He put out an ad saying that he'd pay big bucks for a small job. One individual who was broke and out of work was intrigued, so he reached out to the number in the ad.
00:10:11
Kenneth explained, I don't care how you do it, but I'll pay you to get rid of my ex-wife.
00:10:15
Make it look like an accident. You can run her over by a car or electrocute her in the bath, but just get it done.
00:10:22
I'll give you $1,000 up front and the remainder of your payment, $3,000, will be waiting for you.
00:10:28
In, wait for it, a nondescript bus locker. Oh, God. When this individual came to the realization that Kenneth was adamant in his plan, he reached out to my Aunt Suzanne to warn her.
00:10:40
What? She contacted the authorities. I know. So cool. She contacted the authorities, and Kenneth was eventually sent to prison for attempted murder.
00:10:48
This old newspaper article I found about this only mentioned the preliminary hearing, so I'm not sure how much time he received upon sentencing.
00:10:56
And then it says in parentheses, L.A. Times, November 1st, 1968. 1968. So it made it all the way to the LA Times. Probably not long enough, given the statutes at
00:11:07
the time. I'm proud of the actions that this stranger took to warn Suzanne and even more
00:11:12
proud for her getting Kenneth out of her and her kids' lives. Pay attention to red flags,
00:11:17
trust your gut, and SSD GM, Shauna. Wow. How terrifying. You get a knock at the door,
00:11:24
some fucking stranger there who's like, guess what? Yeah. That's awful. And he went to her before calling the police, which I find kind of funny.
00:11:34
Well, which actually I think may have been the smartest move because before he lets the red tape get, he's like, you need to know that you have to stay away from this guy, which is very cool.
00:11:46
Also, Shauna, you need to know that was a very well-written email. So do not say writing is not your strong suit because I would argue that it is Yes absolutely That was perfect Yeah This one called Found Treasure Story in DC Yay You all are wonderful and I have a tendency to ramble so I should really
00:12:07
get started. In a recent mini-show, number 342, you requested found money stories and mischievous
00:12:12
pet stories. I have both, but I'm going to choose the found money story because the pet one involves
00:12:17
a lot of pooping and vomiting, so I'll spare you. Thank you. A couple of years ago, I lived in DC
00:12:24
and it was the first city I ever lived in. I am from and have lived in most places
00:12:28
where it is necessary to drive everywhere. Anyway, this particular day, a friend and I were planning to go see an exhibit
00:12:35
at the Japanese Cultural Center on the History of Denim. Very cool, right? Yes. The location-
00:12:41
Denim? Like jeans? Yeah. Denim. Okay. The location is very much in a section of DC
00:12:47
where it would be a stupid idea to drive, but nevertheless, I made the call and got in my car.
00:12:52
I picked up my friend and proceeded to navigate the busy city streets when my friend exclaimed,
00:12:57
pull over. Without questioning, I pulled into the exit of a parking garage and turned on my hazards.
00:13:03
My friend jumps out of the car and runs into the busy street and starts collecting what
00:13:07
I can only make out as small pieces of paper blowing through the traffic and pedestrians
00:13:12
walking on the sidewalk. When he gets back into the car, I'm able to see that he is holding a wad of $20 bills.
00:13:19
Oh. Oh, loose $20 bills were blowing down this very busy DC street and no one noticed except for my
00:13:26
friend. It was a real life money grabbing booth. And he was able to snatch about $240.
00:13:33
Holy shit. I know. It's a dream come true. Yeah. We argued about what cut I should receive from
00:13:40
being the getaway driver and I could only convince him to give me around 40 bucks.
00:13:45
I call bullshit on that. She should have gotten more. She definitely should have. And also it's
00:13:49
Just like as my friend used to say, you didn't pay for it. Give me half. Like you just went outside and grabbed some shit.
00:13:55
So yeah, whatever. I'm not still bitter about that or anything. Stay sexy and keep your eyes peeled for loose 20s blowing down the street.
00:14:05
Sam, she, her. Wait, Sam, did they know why? Like, did they figure that out? I can't imagine.
00:14:11
Maybe someone listening right now is talking about the time they lost $300 in 20s in D.C.
00:14:16
I like to imagine that like the U.S. mint backdoor blew open and a bunch of 20s flew off the machine.
00:14:23
Freshly minted 20s out in the street. NYX, that's K-N-I-X leak-proof underwear, isn't just for one moment.
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That's K-N-I-X.com. Code FLOW15. This is Ashley I from the Almost Famous Podcast.
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Can I be honest for a second? Some mornings I look in the mirror and I think, why do I look this tired?
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I look for anything that can de-puff me, and this really did my under eyes look brighter.
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My face looked way more refreshed. It's almost like my face just exhaled. So try the Holistic Goddess Organic Castor Oil Roll-On with frankincense yourself.
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00:16:26
Hey everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm the host of Ear Say, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club.
00:16:33
This week on the podcast, I am sitting down with Ray Porter, the narrator of Andy Weir's audiobook Project Hail Mary,
00:16:41
massive sci-fi adventure about survival and science and what happens when you wake up alone very far from Earth.
00:16:49
I really had to make a decision because I caught myself getting that frog in my throat and starting to get teary as I'm narrating some of these sections.
00:16:57
And it's like, OK, yo, yo, yo, is this indulgent? And I really thought about it. I was like, no, at this point, it would kind of be betraying the trust the author and the listener have in telling this story if I don't go through it.
00:17:09
But there's places in this book that deeply emotionally affected me. And I left it on the mic.
00:17:15
That's great. Because it served the story. People will say like, oh, my God, I cried at the end.
00:17:20
It's like, yeah, dude, me too. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
00:17:29
Okay, I'll just start it. Hi, Georgia Karen and MFM crew. I know how much you guys love a good ghost story and a found treasure story.
00:17:40
So here's one rolled together. About eight years ago, my wonderful mother passed away unexpectedly from a heart attack.
00:17:47
She was at home alone at the time, but managed to call 911. Unfortunately, she was gone before the paramedics arrived.
00:17:53
my sister and I grown adults living in separate states returned home to start the gut process of planning her funeral That horrible So sad So sad After a day or two of being home our dad asked where her wedding rings that she wore every day were because he wanted to put them in a safe spot
00:18:11
It hadn't occurred to us to ask about the jewelry she was wearing when she was taken to the hospital,
00:18:16
so I called the appropriate people assuming I would just pick them up. except I was told my mom wasn't wearing any jewelry when the paramedics arrived.
00:18:26
Apparently, this is all very well documented, and no jewelry or rings were with her at the time.
00:18:32
My mom loved jewelry, and this seemed very odd, but I chalked it up to it being earlier in the morning when she passed,
00:18:38
and she hadn't gotten her full look together for the day, L-E-W-K. I love it. This is when my sister and I both remember something odd.
00:18:47
Now, I don't know if this was a common held belief by an older generation or just a strange family thing, but our grandparents and assumingly our mom by association were convinced that if paramedics ever came to your house, you needed to hide all of your valuables to prevent them from being stolen.
00:19:04
Oh my God, poor first responders, like just immediately not trusted. I mean, I don't know. I feel like I'm on everybody's side on this one where it's like...
00:19:16
it's just a funny thing where it's just like, it could be any number. Is that an Italian thing?
00:19:21
Is it an immigrant thing? Is it a certain part of town thing? Could be anything.
00:19:26
I mean, it could be a legit thing back in the day that they actually stole shit. So who the
00:19:30
fuck knows? Yeah. Back when fire departments were private companies where it was just like
00:19:34
five dudes that would come into your house and do whatever they wanted. Sure. And it must have
00:19:39
been discussed multiple times during our childhoods because we both remembered it. Like,
00:19:43
grandma these good people are here to help and no one's trying to take your collection of glass
00:19:48
ducks in the curio cabinet and who has the time or the right frame of mind to hide things in an
00:19:54
emergency anyway well it turns out my mom sharon that's who oh so my sister and i discreetly start
00:20:02
to look around the house on this effed up treasure hunt all while trying to not let our dad figure
00:20:07
out what we're doing we go through all the quickly accessible spots some obvious like ring stands
00:20:13
bedside tables jewelry drawers etc and some not so obvious we find every piece of jewelry we knew
00:20:19
about and lots of questionable but entertaining costume jewelry but we cannot find her wedding
00:20:24
rings i'm trying not to panic jumping between where the hell could she have put them and oh my god
00:20:30
my parents were right all along and they are stolen and how the fuck are we going to tell
00:20:35
our dad we can't find the rings now this is where the story gets good we're maybe four days in at
00:20:41
the house and I'm trying to take a nap in my teenage bedroom. I haven't slept in days and I'm
00:20:46
in a half awake, half asleep trance when I see my mom. In this dream, vision, whatever you want to
00:20:53
call it, I see her standing in front of the closet in her bedroom, looking at me like she's making
00:20:59
sure I'm paying attention. She shows me her hands with her perfectly manicured red nails. And then
00:21:05
in parentheses, I did not inherit her skills at self manicures, by the way, a fact that I'm still
00:21:11
very disappointed at. And then with such vivid detail, she holds the precious rings in her hands,
00:21:18
goes to the very back of the walk-in closet to a robe hidden behind all of her clothes,
00:21:23
and proceeds to put the rings in the right-hand pocket of the robe. I wake up with a gasp,
00:21:30
sit up straight in bed, freaking out my husband who was sitting next to me, and bolt out of bed
00:21:35
saying, I know where the rings are. I run through the house to the opposite side to her room,
00:21:41
to the walk-in closet and guess what I find in the very back hidden behind her clothes
00:21:46
is the robe exactly as I saw it in my dream and in the right hand pocket of the robe are her
00:21:52
wedding rings. Oh my fucking God. I loved my funny sweet mom so much. Oh no. Oh. I loved my funny
00:22:03
sweet mom so much and I'm grateful that even in the afterlife her organized and thoughtful spirit
00:22:09
But made sure I found her hidden treasure. I just can't get over her vision where her mom is acting like her mom being like, look at me.
00:22:19
I need you to follow me on this thing. Watch what I'm doing. Don't look at your phone right now.
00:22:25
This is important. Later on, when the house was being sold and we had to move everything out, I made sure to hang on to that robe just in case.
00:22:33
My husband and I are often in the car eight plus hours a week commuting and love your podcast.
00:22:40
Thank you for helping those long hours pass quickly. Stay sexy and make sure someone in your family knows your paranoid hiding spots.
00:22:48
XX Jess. Oh my God. That's unbelievable. Also just that Jess got to have one last moment with her mom.
00:22:57
Yeah. Yeah. That's what you always hope for, right? Yeah. You just not having to kind of do it by yourself and be picturing it, but to actually like she came to me in a dream and boss me around one last time.
00:23:10
And it gives you that like hope that there is something more like afterlife. Yes.
00:23:16
And their memory is still with you and maybe a part of them is with you too. And, you know, that she's making you focus on what's important, which is rings and valuables.
00:23:26
Jewelry. Jewelry. nyx that's knix leak-proof underwear isn't just for one moment it's for all the everyday moments
00:23:37
you didn't realize leak-proof underwear could make easier maybe it's day one of your period
00:23:42
maybe it's a long travel day maybe it's hot outside you're on the move and you just want
00:23:47
to feel fresh their leak-proof underwear comes in a range of absorbencies from light to ultra
00:23:53
and helps protect against periods, light leaks, sweat, and everyday surprises. And because they look...
00:24:00
Look and feel like real underwear. They're soft, invisible underclothes and machine washable.
00:24:06
No extra hassle. No complicated routine. Just dependable protection you can wash and re-wear.
00:24:13
See why millions have made the switch to leak-proof underwear. Visit Nix.com. That's K-N-I-X dot com and use code FLOW15 for 15% off.
00:24:24
That's K-N-I-X dot com. Code FLOW15. This is Ashley I from the Almost Famous Podcast.
00:24:30
Can I be honest for a second? Some mornings I look in the mirror and I think, why do I look this tired?
00:24:36
Puffiness around the eyes, dullness. Because sometimes stress starts showing up on your face before you even realize it.
00:24:42
And that's why I've been loving this holistic goddess organic castor oil roll-on with frankincense.
00:24:49
No crazy chemicals, no expensive treatments. It's just organic castor oil, frankincense, in this rose quartz roller that feels so good on tired, stressed skin.
00:24:59
I look for anything that can de-puff me, and this really did. My under eyes look brighter.
00:25:05
My face looked way more refreshed. It's almost like my face just exhaled. So try the Holistic Goddess Organic Castor Oil Roll-On with frankincense yourself.
00:25:15
Use my promo code Ashley at tryhg.com slash Ashley for 15% off. Promo code Ashley at tryhg.com slash Ashley.
00:25:28
Hey everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm the host of Ear Say, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club.
00:25:36
This week on the podcast, I'm sitting down with Ray Porter, the narrator of Andy Weir's audiobook Project Hail Mary,
00:25:43
massive sci-fi adventure about survival and science and what happens when you wake up alone very far from Earth.
00:25:52
I really had to make a decision because I caught myself getting that frog in my throat and starting to get teary
00:25:57
as I'm narrating some of these sections. And it's like, okay, yo, yo, yo, is this indulgent?
00:26:02
And I really thought about it. I was like, no, at this point, it would kind of be betraying
00:26:06
the trust the author and the listener have in telling this story if I don't go through it.
00:26:12
But there's places in this book that deeply emotionally affected me. And I left it on the mic.
00:26:18
That's great. Because it served the story. People will say like, oh, my God, I cried at the end.
00:26:23
It's like, yeah, dude, me too. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
00:26:34
Well, this one is like, is that your last one? Is it? No, I think of one more. Because this is like, that was such a heart tugging one.
00:26:41
I don't, that'd be a good ender, but this isn't heart tugging at all. Well, it's my fault it was heart tugging because I just, that was me having a moment.
00:26:49
So we can cut that part out. No, I loved it. This one is not heart tugging and it's called reason for the binocular ban of 1914 mentioned
00:27:00
in episode 384. Oh, hi all love the pod. And I thought I'd share this interesting old timey story from London.
00:27:08
In episode 384, when telling the story of Billy Carlton, Georgia mentioned that there was a law in Britain in 1914 that forbid people from buying binoculars.
00:27:18
I can tell you why. Oh, nice. In 1914, the First World War was just starting. And it was the first war where the range of the ballistics and weaponry had become so long that a lot of the fighting was taking place from a really far distance I hadn thought about that That means that one of the most important pieces of military equipment were high quality binoculars as they helped the soldiers hit their targets
00:27:41
Now, at that time, the UK was suffering from a huge shortage of glass. If you want to learn more
00:27:47
about why that was, you should read British journalist Ed Conway's book, The Material World.
00:27:52
That's also where I got this story from. Germany, on the other hand, were the leaders in making all
00:27:57
sorts of advanced telescopes and binoculars, which put them at a huge advantage. There were
00:28:02
public campaigns in the UK that not only stopped people from buying binoculars, but also encouraged
00:28:07
people to donate any that they had to the military, including things like opera glasses.
00:28:13
Apparently the king and queen donated some too. What makes this story really interesting is that
00:28:17
Britain actually sent a spy to Switzerland to try and negotiate with the Germans to allow Britain to
00:28:23
buy binoculars from them. So basically trying to buy equipment from Germany that would make it
00:28:28
easier for them to kill Germans. Yeah. Yeah. What's crazy is that Germany accepted the offer
00:28:34
in return for rubber for tires and engine fan belts because the UK was controlling supply of
00:28:40
rubber via its colonies. Jesus. I mean, Jesus Christ. That's dark. Men and their wars. Fucking
00:28:48
A. And capitalism. And colonialism. The exchange of goods never actually took place because the UK
00:28:56
managed to start producing glass domestically instead. Really not sure what the moral of the
00:29:01
story is here, except for stay sexy and hold on to your opera binoculars. You never know when they
00:29:06
may become handy, question mark. Heidi Sheher. I love that Heidi was like in the midst of what
00:29:14
sounds like a fascinating book. And then it's like, she's listening to a true crime podcast.
00:29:18
And she's like, I could tell you about this part. I can help you with this. Worlds collide. That book sounds good. Again, it's called The Material World by Ed Conway.
00:29:28
Yeah. Love it. I also like the idea of a soldier that's like shooting long distance and then holding up
00:29:35
opera glasses all fancy. Yeah. Okay. Here's my last one. The subject line is my dad's adventure on the river.
00:29:45
Hi there, Karen in Georgia. I refuse to believe that Steven is no longer there, but proud of him for doing what he needed to do.
00:29:52
So I'm adding him in too. But really, hi, everyone who works for MFM. Thanks for making this fun show that I've been listening to since its inception.
00:30:01
I recently listened to the cruise ship near death experience, and I wanted to share my dad's.
00:30:06
My dad and his dad used to take their boat out on the Missouri River together to water ski back in the 60s.
00:30:14
Wow. Nowadays, water skiing usually requires more than two people and for good reason.
00:30:19
When the skier falls, someone else is usually in the boat and can alert the driver that, hey, the skier's down, turn the boat around and go get them.
00:30:26
But on this particular day, it was just my dad and his dad, no spotter. So cue my dad falling.
00:30:32
It was inevitable. He was bound to fall. When he did, he just had to chill in the water until his dad figured out that he needed to turn around and go back to get him.
00:30:40
Sometimes it would take a while for his dad to realize, meaning he'd be very far away down the river and then think, oh, I have to go back and get my kid.
00:30:48
My dad tried his best to yell at his dad, but the boat motor was too loud and he watched his dad just keep going down the river farther and farther until he was almost out of sight.
00:30:58
My dad figured he'd be waiting a while. So he was just treading water and enjoying nature when all of a sudden he heard this
00:31:06
Sucking sound and it literally like so long S But then it says kind of like that annoying noise that someone makes when they trying to drink that last
00:31:20
drop of drink out of a straw. So he thought to himself, hmm, this is probably not good.
00:31:25
And then he looks over and realizes that the noise is coming from a giant water vortex.
00:31:31
huh he tries his best to swim away from the noise but the current became too strong and he realized
00:31:39
that he was just going to get pulled down into the vortex oh my god he looked for his dad again
00:31:45
but his dad still hadn't turned around oh dude just every few seconds turn around you're just
00:31:51
like can we have a pre-agreement that you're not just gonna fuck off down the river because
00:31:56
I mean, Jesus. Okay. He didn't want to waste precious energy yelling and waving for his dad since his dad was too far away to possibly see or hear him.
00:32:06
My dad has always struck me as a very calm and collected guy. And I think that's the thing that saved his life that day.
00:32:11
Before he got too close to the vortex, he took off his ski belt and kicked off his skis.
00:32:17
He just let the current from the vortex suck him in. Imagine how fucking scary this would be.
00:32:22
And then he took a deep breath when it pulled him down under the water. My dad is a pretty smart guy, and he knew that the only way out of the current would be to angle away from it.
00:32:31
So he tucked himself into a cannonball position, and when his feet hit the floor of the river,
00:32:37
he sprang up from the bottom of the floor to the surface of the water at an angle,
00:32:42
pointing his body upward and straight like a pencil, and then swam away with all his might.
00:32:48
I think he told me that the river must have only been 10 or 15 feet deep at this spot, thankfully.
00:32:53
Once he reached the surface and he popped his head out of the water, he had made it far enough away from the vortex.
00:33:00
His dad had just happened to be waiting in the boat close to the spot where my dad had materialized and said to him, where the fuck did you go?
00:33:09
This story has always been one of my favorites to listen to my dad tell because I never ceased to be amazed at how he just accepted the situation, came up with a plan and stuck to it in order to get out.
00:33:20
I recall this story often when I'm faced with a strange situation and remind myself that sometimes you just have to accept what's going to happen to you, but you don't have to accept that it's going to hurt you.
00:33:30
I think that's the reason that survivor stories are so cool. There's this grit to those survivors.
00:33:36
Like these were the cards they were dealt, but somehow they figured out a way to change the game and win anyway.
00:33:42
Stay sexy and tell your dad when you get sucked into a water vortex next time. For goodness sake, Megan.
00:33:49
Oh, like what a freak thing. I mean, I'm not familiar with rivers, but that doesn't sound like something
00:33:55
that happens all the time. No, and you know, it's super weird. The reason I got excited
00:33:59
when I started reading this email is because I watched a TikTok the other day where it just said at the top,
00:34:05
watch till the end. And it just looked like a very calm, still river with some trees in it.
00:34:11
Did you see that one? I saw that. And the trees just start going underwater. Totally.
00:34:17
And then the vortex starts. Sucking everything down and around. That is the craziest video.
00:34:22
And I bet it happens more often and people have seen it, but they don't survive it.
00:34:27
So they can't talk about it. Right? Yeah, they can't report back. Yeah, only if you're standing on the riverbank and only if you have a phone ready.
00:34:35
But like in a time before cell phones, it was just people going, okay, so I'm standing there and all of a sudden all the trees disappear on the other side of the riverbank.
00:34:43
Yeah and no one believes you This happened to me once in Hawaii where I was trying to get out of the ocean and I was mistiming it how the waves were coming
00:34:55
And I basically got yanked back in. And so it was real weird. It was like the sand went out from under my, I thought I could kind of walk in.
00:35:03
It's like a riptide. Yeah. Yes. So the sand just falls away from under my feet. I get pulled backwards and I had the same thing where I was just like, do not panic.
00:35:12
Right. Take it like as I was going, I was just like, take the biggest breath you can get into a ball and understand that you have to wait this out. And it's probably not going to be as quick as you want. So just calm down.
00:35:25
Yeah. Panicking is the worst possible thing you could do in so many situations. Yeah. In those you have to go like, help me lizard brain. Like you have to go into that part of your brain where it's like, this is the survival part of my brain where no talking, no yelling.
00:35:38
No, there isn't like a TikTok how-to about surviving fucking nature. Tell us about, write us in your freak of nature survival stories, please.
00:35:48
Or your parents or your grandparents. We don't care whose they are. Any, or just if you've heard one, we love those.
00:35:54
Right, right. And thanks for listening and hanging out with us for a little bit.
00:35:59
And sharing your stories. That was an excellent batch of stories. Definitely. Stay sexy.
00:36:04
And don't get murdered. Elvis, do you want a cookie? Goodbye. for the black carton in the egg aisle and visit vitalfarms.com to learn more. Vital Farms, good
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Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

  • 85
    Most heartwarming
  • 80
    Most emotional
  • 80
    Most heartbreaking
  • 75
    Most shocking

Episode Highlights

  • Halloween Choking Incident
    A father's calmness saves his family from choking on Halloween night.
    “Thank God for my superhero dad.”
    @ 04m 08s
    August 14, 2023
  • A Mother's Hidden Treasure
    A daughter discovers her late mother's wedding rings in a dream-like vision.
    “I know where the rings are.”
    @ 21m 30s
    August 14, 2023
  • A Last Moment with Mom
    Jess shares a poignant dream about her mother, offering hope of an afterlife.
    “That's what you always hope for, right?”
    @ 22m 59s
    August 14, 2023
  • Surviving a Water Vortex
    A gripping tale of a father's calmness in a life-threatening situation on the river.
    “Imagine how fucking scary this would be.”
    @ 32m 20s
    August 14, 2023

Episode Quotes

  • What? Yes.
    MFM Minisode 345
  • Thank God for my superhero dad.
    MFM Minisode 345
  • Stay sexy and make sure someone in your family knows your paranoid hiding spots.
    MFM Minisode 345
  • You just not having to kind of do it by yourself...
    MFM Minisode 345
  • Imagine how fucking scary this would be.
    MFM Minisode 345
  • Panicking is the worst possible thing you could do in so many situations.
    MFM Minisode 345

Key Moments

  • Halloween Chaos02:51
  • Superhero Dad04:08
  • Hidden Treasure21:30
  • Paranoid Hiding Spots22:43
  • Dreams and Afterlife23:01
  • Water Vortex Encounter31:06
  • Calm in Crisis32:09
  • Survival Stories35:43

Tension Over Time

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown