00:00:00
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My favorite murder Comptuous and yet familiar. And yet you're like, oh, these bitches.
00:02:56
I know who they are. They're doing it again. I fucking know who these bitches are.
00:02:59
Why don't you go first? Okay. Starting off with a classic. Murder in my grandfather's laundromat.
00:03:06
Classic hometown. Oh, it says, hi. While visiting my parents over the holidays, the topic of true crime came up.
00:03:13
My mom out of nowhere said, you know, someone was murdered at your grandpa's laundromat.
00:03:18
Oh, my God. And then it says, do go on, Mom. Here's what she told me. One day in 1988, she and her family were sitting around the breakfast table when there came a startling knock at the door.
00:03:29
Three suits, as she called them, flashed badges and pushed their way inside. My grandpa was taken into police custody.
00:03:36
He was the suspect of a murder. Early that morning, the body of a young woman had been discovered on a back road outside of our little Midwest farming town.
00:03:46
Holy shit. So scary. Yeah. You're in a place that's like always quiet. There's not a lot going on.
00:03:51
Totally. And then a, I mean, that's the beginning of so many movies. Horrible. Also discovered was a huge pool of blood trailing out the door of our family's laundromat.
00:04:02
According to my mom, the victim was known to spend a lot of time at the laundromat.
00:04:05
Another man was known to spend a lot of time there as well, who, according to small town gossip, had a thing for her.
00:04:13
That guy was tracked down by police at a car wash. And then this is italicized and bolded, literally cleaning blood out of his car.
00:04:21
Can you say caught red-handed? Here's a quote directly from the case files. That's some serious work.
00:04:29
Quote, police then approached him, told him he was not under arrest, and indicated that they wanted to talk to him about the murder.
00:04:36
At that point, the defendant told police that, quote, Monday was a bad day. Oh, my God.
00:04:41
End quote. So, obviously, my grandfather was very quickly dropped as a suspect. The man never admitted to the crime and appealed his case several times, but was sentenced to life in prison.
00:04:51
Word around town is that he killed several people. That was just the one murder he got caught for.
00:04:58
Yeah. There are a lot of details I'd love to add, but I'll leave you with this. Forensic investigation was complicated because it became apparent that someone unidentified had been in the crime scene after the murder and before it was discovered by the police.
00:05:13
Oh, no. This person was later discovered to be a lady from town who had come in to do laundry and didn't tell anyone about the blood because, quote, that wasn't any of my business.
00:05:24
End quote. Girl. And then it just says, thanks, guys. No name. Wow. Ma'am. Like chilling detail.
00:05:32
Right. That you'd walk in and just have no emotions about it, you know. Or whatever the emotions that you have about it There something else in you that says getting involved is dangerous or bad for me or something that it like not an option But it almost like it makes sense to say it none of your business If you walking by outside and looking Right You step inside you part of the crime scene Yeah Yeah Here in 2025 all of us step in or need to know that
00:06:06
Totally. Wow. You're in it. Your DNA puts you in it. That's right. That's a crazy one.
00:06:11
Yeah. All right. Let's do it. 180? Yeah. Okay. This is called Trash Kid, That Time I Committed Fraud.
00:06:20
Dear ladies, you heard the Trash Dad stories. You know all about the trash uncles and the trash moms.
00:06:26
But what if I told you I was a trash kid and a criminal to boot? Okay, I'm sorry.
00:06:32
But first of all, hell yes. What were we thinking? Not asking for this from the beginning.
00:06:37
Trash kids. Because my favorite trash kid of all time is the very, I think, year one story of the little boy who rode around on his bicycle.
00:06:47
Chopping down. Chopping down telephone poles with a fucking chainsaw. chainsaw yeah that got turned into an mfm animated like one of the first mfm animated and also by an
00:06:57
art by a listener artist got turned into a pin that was given me at a live show that i have and
00:07:02
carry around with me to this day it was like for me high art yeah it was really well done
00:07:10
unbelievably beautiful okay so send us your trash trash trash kid stories whether it's you or a
00:07:16
sibling, we want to know. Please, everything you did that you got caught with and in trouble for
00:07:21
and then some. Okay, so picture it. Northern Vermont, circa 1999. My parents were a part of
00:07:27
the Friday Night Bowling League. At this point, I'm about six years old, and rather than pay a
00:07:31
babysitter, my parents dragged me along to sit at the bowling alley until late in the night. Okay.
00:07:36
Of course they did. Their fault. Yeah. The bowling alley had a huge arcade, and little me loved
00:07:41
basking in the flashing lights of the kid casino. However, we didn't often have enough money for the
00:07:45
arcade all the money was earmarks for beer and pizza obviously yeah and so i and the other kids
00:07:51
were delegated to simply looking at the games and pretending that we were playing them which is a
00:07:56
thing i forgot completely just pretending that you're playing them yeah because they're doing
00:08:01
they're showing you what could happen right in the video game and you're just pretending that
00:08:05
you're trying to practice especially on centipede right when you've lost all your money already
00:08:10
playing fucking Pac-Man. Like we'd usually get a dollar four quarters. That's four tries.
00:08:16
Which is gone in a flash. Yes. I mean, especially when you're like bad. For us, they were literally the newest thing
00:08:22
there was. So we're just like, how do you control this centipede? I've always been bad at them.
00:08:26
That was not enough. So a small group of us hatched a diabolical plan that would get us all the quarters we could ever
00:08:32
want. And it seemed like such an easy solution. We were cute. Adults love cute kids, right?
00:08:38
Would adults just give cute kids money? Probably not. They needed a reason. Sick kids. That's it. We needed them to give us money
00:08:47
to help sick kids. That's right. If you hadn't figured out our grand plan, it was to stand near
00:08:54
the entrance to the bowling alley and tell people as they entered that we were raising money for the
00:08:58
local children's hospital. Oh, my. Over the course of roughly two hours, we had hoodwinked enough
00:09:05
people to get almost $80 in donations. That is so many fucking quarters. It was all going according
00:09:13
to plan until it wasn't. It turns out some of these adults had been talking with the manager
00:09:18
about the cute little philanthropists at the front entrance, and the manager had no idea what they
00:09:22
were talking about. Long story short, our parents were pulled from their games, and I didn't see the
00:09:27
sun for weeks. I also was dressed down by my mom, Becky, don't you dare call her Rebecca,
00:09:33
who both instilled the fear of God in me and made me see the error of my ways. She was a small woman, but she made up for that with sheer volume
00:09:41
and by being an absolute badass who raised six kids in a blended home. We lost her in 2023 to a mixture of throat cancer and COPD.
00:09:50
Don't smoke, kids. Her loss has been the most profound of my life. Up until she lost the ability to speak, she was the person I called every day on my way home from work.
00:09:59
I told her everything. She was one of my biggest advocates when I came out as trans.
00:10:04
She was my favorite person. I honestly don't think I'd be a fraction of the person I am today without her.
00:10:09
Stay sexy and hug your mom. She may just save you from a life of crime. Ada, she, her.
00:10:16
Ada. Ada, that was one of my favorite stories. Just. But you deserved everything Becky brought to you and more.
00:10:25
Yeah, you did. 80 bucks, though. Like she had, Becky had to be a little proud. I mean,
00:10:31
secretly. Cause also I just, I'm assuming what they were a handful of kids, five kids.
00:10:35
Yeah. Like they would have been just golden in that, that arcade all night long.
00:10:40
Oh my God. Oh my God. Like who wants candy more candy. Yeah. I'll go to a candy machine.
00:10:45
Yeah. Corn dogs, corn dogs all around. It almost feels like if you get past the finish line,
00:10:50
you get to keep the money and then you're in trouble. Right. They didn't say what happened to the money.
00:10:53
Also, How cute are these kids that without a bucket or any signage, they're just like.
00:10:59
They got it. I did it. I don't know. I'm on the kid's side. Hello, beautiful. I'm Amy Eric, founder of Madison Reed, a hair color company I named after my daughter.
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00:12:33
That's code CRY at G-R-U-N-S dot C-O. The subject line of this email is my visit to the Jack the Ripper Museum in London.
00:12:44
So you and I haven't talked about the fact that they are claiming that they have solved the Jack the Murder case.
00:12:50
Jack the Ripper. What did I just say? Jack the Murder. Do you mind if I don't pay attention while I'm talking during this one?
00:12:59
Is that okay? Necessary. Yeah, we'll talk about it. I'm skeptical. Me too. So let's wait until it's verified.
00:13:06
I'm also skeptical because, oh, by the way, back on TikTok. People were telling me how to tell you to get back on it.
00:13:10
I mean, God bless our listeners who I got so many messages on Blue Sky, like so nice.
00:13:17
Here's how to do it, yeah. But one of the first things I saw was someone that was talking about that and how it's like,
00:13:22
oh okay so just this apron or whatever that's been sitting there for years and anyone could touch
00:13:27
yeah interesting we should talk about that yeah yeah we will should we do like a retro style and
00:13:32
just do a one subject jack the ripper episode we could retell the whole story okay it says hi ladies
00:13:39
and all mfm family pretty much a day one listener and a second time writer thank you so much for
00:13:45
getting me through a lot of time in the hospital over the last few years having multiple surgeries
00:13:48
for endometriosis. Rough. I've lived just outside of London my whole life, but somehow I didn't know
00:13:55
until recently that there was a Jack the Ripper museum. Did you know that? No, but why wouldn't
00:14:00
there be? Like, it makes sense. And also, why didn't I go there when I was so smart trying to
00:14:04
cover Jack the Ripper woman? I mean, why wouldn't there be? Is that what you just said? Yeah. Because
00:14:09
that's what this email says. Sorry. My son is also a murderino at the age of 14, and he's studying
00:14:15
law and criminology. So when I was looking for days out for us to do together, we were both
00:14:20
excited to discover this little gem of a museum. It's set in a townhouse type building over four
00:14:26
floors and close to the Tower of London and to the Ripper's hunting grounds. There are sections
00:14:31
dedicated to the victims, the suspects, and reconstructions of one of the crime scenes
00:14:36
and of what the Ripper's living room may have looked like, where you can hunt for clues as to
00:14:42
his identity. We were absolutely in our element. Some of the best things we saw were the letters
00:14:47
written to the police from Jack the Ripper, and also the whistle used by one of the policemen who
00:14:52
found the body of Catherine Eddowes. Wow. Yeah, that would be so creepy and fascinating to see
00:14:59
the reconstruction of a crime scene of those murders. God. Okay. I would have loved to have
00:15:06
done the walking tour too, but those cobbled streets don't go well with my wheelchair.
00:15:10
your idea for a virtual walking tour is perfect for me great yeah i love that just as an extra fact the town i live in used to house the asylum that aaron kaczynski one of the
00:15:22
suspects who's the suspect they think they've identified through dna spent his final days it
00:15:28
is now a park that is supposedly haunted it's the hauntedest park in park land i mean
00:15:33
a haunted park though where it's like we're the ghost from the building that used to be here
00:15:39
Yeah, we're still here. You knocked the building down. Get off my bench. Yeah, I hate squirrels.
00:15:45
Okay. Also, my husband works for the Freemasons, and I like to joke that his employers are the reason Jack the Ripper was never caught.
00:15:53
SSDGM and keep trying to solve the Ripper mystery. Sarah, she, her. Sarah must have written that before this DNA stuff came out.
00:16:01
I mean, if Sarah's a day one listener and a second time writer, this could easily be from 1997, and we just don't realize it.
00:16:08
Wow. Okay. Yeah, we're gonna have to get into that. Yeah. All right. This one's called Glitch
00:16:12
in the Matrix slash Instant Karma. And I love it because I love those Glitch in the Matrix stories.
00:16:19
Hi, ladies. This story was buried deep in the recesses of my sleep deprived brain,
00:16:23
but it came rushing back to me while listening to a recent hometown. It was the early 2000s. I was a junior in high school. My friend and I were enjoying some chicken
00:16:31
nuggets at Wendy's across town. It's just the kind of crazy shit me and my bad girl crew used
00:16:37
to get up to in high school. Just kidding. We were nerds. When a somewhat disheveled woman came
00:16:42
rushing into the restaurant, she scanned the place and came over to our table. This woman launched
00:16:47
into a long story about how her car had run out of gas just before the exit and she had to abandon
00:16:52
it, but she didn't have any money to buy gas because she left her wallet at home. And can we
00:16:56
please give her some spare change so she could buy some gas just enough to get her back to her house?
00:17:01
My friend shot me a skeptical look. I peeked in my wallet, hesitated for a moment, then handed over
00:17:06
my last $5 bill. The woman looked shocked that her story worked, question mark, and said,
00:17:12
oh, no, that's too much. And I said, well, that's all I've got. Besides, that's not much gas.
00:17:18
Thank you so much. I'll come right back once I get my wallet. I'll pay you back.
00:17:22
Don't worry about it. I shrugged. It's good karma. My friend rolled her eyes as the woman
00:17:27
walked out. I bet she doesn't even have a car. You got played. Yeah, probably, I thought.
00:17:32
The next day at school, I was packing up my things after a play rehearsal. I picked up my backpack from the auditorium seat to find a crisp $5 bill sitting under it.
00:17:42
Now, mind you, these were the auditorium seats that fold up if there's nothing holding them down, like in the movie theater.
00:17:48
So this had to have been placed very carefully under my backpack. I looked around in disbelief.
00:17:54
I even called my friend to ask if she snuck the money under there but she had no idea what I was talking about Quick turnaround for that karma I guess Just was there And there probably no way that woman knew where they went to school or anything
00:18:09
And it was a scam, probably, which is fine. But it just happened. Maybe she put her bag down earlier.
00:18:14
For the exact same amount? I know. And it's crisp. Wild. Yeah, like someone went to the bank.
00:18:20
Yeah. Just fucking happened. What? A couple decades later, I now work as an emergency room doctor.
00:18:26
Every day, I meet people in desperate circumstances, some of which they share with me and some things they don't.
00:18:32
I have a few minutes to try and gain a patient's trust. When it goes well, it can be incredibly rewarding.
00:18:37
When it doesn't, I try to remind myself that you don't need to know or understand a person's whole story to act with kindness.
00:18:44
And that kindness will usually make its way back to you. Thank you for the incredible stories you share every week.
00:18:49
This podcast has accompanied me on countless drives to and from the ER and stroller walks with my baby and toddler.
00:18:56
And it says see sleep deprivation reference above. The work you do to help humans understand each other is important and I am grateful whenever I can listen.
00:19:05
Stay sexy and trust in karma. Victoria. Victoria, an emergency room doctor telling us that our work is...
00:19:13
I know. What the fuck? Come on. What a lovely message. Also, just that's such a hard job.
00:19:19
Emergency room, it's like, it's the kind of thing where it's like, you have a job where it's the emotional equivalent of somebody that will every night, right when you're at your most asleep, open your bedroom door and start screaming.
00:19:30
Right? I mean, I make fucking TV shows about it. Like, there's no drama TV shows.
00:19:35
There's, yeah, exactly. For a reason. That is like, that is the ultimate drama. Yeah, it's called ER.
00:19:39
It's like, that's how hard it is. God, that was a good show. So good. Thanks, Victoria.
00:19:45
Hello, beautiful. I'm Amy Erick, founder of Madison Reed, a hair color company I named after my daughter.
00:19:51
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00:19:57
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00:20:07
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00:20:15
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00:20:30
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00:20:46
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00:21:00
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00:21:06
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00:21:11
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00:21:19
That's code CRY at G-R-U-N-S dot C-O. The subject line of this email is kind of cute ghost story, question mark in parentheses.
00:21:30
Cute ghost story, okay. It says, hello all animals included. I'm pretty new here and have just started listening to the podcast a few months ago.
00:21:38
Of course, from the beginning, as I don't want to feel excluded from inside jokes.
00:21:43
We got to tell you, all these jokes are just repeating. There's nothing inside that's confusing.
00:21:49
Yeah, but it could be fun. Oh, yeah. I mean, definitely start from the beginning.
00:21:53
Okay. So even though it's been a while since you guys have talked about ghosts, or at least up until episode 263.
00:21:59
Oh, my God. We have so many fucking. We got to pause this podcast so that people can catch up.
00:22:05
You know what I mean? Yeah, that's a great idea. Take a few months off. Everyone catch up.
00:22:08
We'll meet you back here. Because we just keep adding, and it's too many. I know.
00:22:12
It's really hard. It seems like we should go on vacation. Wait. That's why we did the Rewind episodes, right?
00:22:17
Yes, exactly. That's a good one. To help people catch up. That's why. To access that easier.
00:22:22
Okay. A few weeks ago, I witnessed something ghost-related. I knew I had to share it with you, so here I go.
00:22:29
It was a Friday night, and we were home alone at my best friend's house. We were pretty baked and had the munchies, so we headed to the kitchen to look for snacks. As we did that, we never stopped talking.
00:22:38
We talked for what felt like hours, and then all of a sudden we stopped. What could have been a comfortable silence was actually much weirder.
00:22:46
The kitchen door, which was almost shut, opened in a manner that only a gentle hand on the other side coming into the kitchen could have opened.
00:22:54
I must have looked clearly disturbed as my friend looked at me and said, don't worry, it's my great grandma.
00:23:00
I asked her to please be clearer as my weed-induced paranoia was about to kick in,
00:23:04
and she proceeded to explain that the apartment we were currently in was where her great-grandma used to live up until she passed away.
00:23:12
Holy shit. Ever since my friend has been living there, there's always doors shutting or opening just like that day,
00:23:18
as if she were still walking perfectly alive around the house. As it's hers, they just say hello and let her do her thing.
00:23:25
Oh my god. Even though I almost threw up out of fear, this story made me feel better.
00:23:30
Plus, I've always felt welcomed there, and the lady had great taste in furniture.
00:23:35
Days after that, I remembered something my own grandma used to say when we were all talking
00:23:40
and conversations would suddenly end at the same time. I'm not going to pronounce this correctly because I don't speak Spanish, but I'm going to attempt.
00:23:47
Paso un angel, which is an angel passed by. So that comforted me too, in a way. I mean, at least it's an angel and not anything else, right?
00:23:57
Now that I've written it down, it sounds way less scarier. actually felt at the time. I get it. It's like explaining a dream to someone and you're like,
00:24:04
no, you don't get it. They say, so just try to remember the whole thing was happening while
00:24:08
being high, which made it a thousand times scary. But it is eerie because when things like that
00:24:13
happen, if it was just kind of like a weird, you know, the wind or something that has a feel to it,
00:24:18
but a door just kind of very slowly opening. Yeah. For no reason. To wrap it up. I'd like to say
00:24:25
I've always been the freak about murders and crime in my family and groups of friends.
00:24:29
and that I really feel at home listening to you guys. Wish you all the best. Julieta from Uruguay.
00:24:35
And then in parentheses, it says pretty fucking far away. We feel at home here too.
00:24:41
And the house is haunted for sure. Whatever home this is that we've made, it's haunted.
00:24:46
That great grandma is strolling around trying to be like, girls, do you have to smoke that much pot?
00:24:52
Or can we make cookies and do some arts and crafts? Oh, that was good. Okay, my last one's short.
00:24:59
Okay. I'm not going to tell you the name of it. It just starts. I just listened to The Hometown about a listener bumping into Aretha Franklin, and I have to
00:25:07
tell you about the time I spilled a drink on Jane Goodall. Yeah. Oh, my God. Wait, are you a monkey?
00:25:16
She just throwing her drink in her face I was a PhD student studying chimpanzees and was attending my first major conference and Jane Goodall obviously an icon was the keynote speaker
00:25:27
I was also like 22 and new to wine. At the reception after Goodall's keynote, I was holding a glass of red wine someone had handed me
00:25:36
and trying to make small talk with big-name scientists. Hello, imposter syndrome.
00:25:40
when I turned around to grab a bacon-wrapped shrimp or something equally exciting for a broke grad student from a passing waiter.
00:25:48
But alas, right behind me was Jane Goodall, and my drink went all caps everywhere.
00:25:54
My only consolation is that because of Jane Goodall's prosopagnosia, which is the inability to recognize faces, she will never know it was me.
00:26:04
Yeah, nice. Don't call me out, just call me E-S-S-D-G-M. E. Prosopagnosia. Prosopagnosia.
00:26:15
Yeah, you say that all the time. Prosopagnosia. I feel like, because it's just a coincidence, I just saw a clip of Jane Goodall and her team releasing a chimpanzee, I believe, into the wild.
00:26:27
And she seems like just in this clip so incredibly serious and kind of like I feel like we couldn pick a worse person to throw wine on to No she like an iconic intelligent probably pretty serious you know serious minded person But if you know Jane Goodall to be different please write in at my favorite murder at Gmail
00:26:51
Oh, my God. What have we got? Jane Goodall is a bad tipper. The full tea. We're trying to cancel Jane Goodall.
00:26:58
No, no, no, no, no. We're the kindest, probably best people ever. Oh, my God. Okay.
00:27:03
Send us your embarrassing stories like that. Did Jane Goodall steal your boyfriend?
00:27:06
And let us know. My favorite murder at Gmail. Thanks, listeners. Thank you. We love you.
00:27:14
We're here for you. Stay sexy. And don't get murdered. Goodbye. Jane Goodall. Elvis, do you want a cookie?
00:27:21
Ah. This has been an Exactly Right production. Our senior producer is Alejandra Keck.
00:27:34
Our editor is Aristotle Acevedo. This episode was mixed by Liana Squalacci. Email your hometowns to myfavoritemurder at gmail.com.
00:27:42
And follow the show on Instagram and Facebook at My Favorite Murder. Goodbye. This episode is brought to you in part by Vital Farms.
00:27:55
Have you noticed that the egg section at the grocery store has gotten very complicated lately But Vital Farms makes it simple Pasture eggs traceable to the farm Their hens have outdoor access year with fresh air and sunshine and forage on rotated pastures with local grasses
00:28:09
Every carton can be traced back to the farm it came from so you can see the pasture where the hens live by visiting vitalfarms.com.
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Look for the black carton in the egg aisle and visit vitalfarms.com to learn more.
00:28:21
Vital Farms, good eggs, no shortcuts. Goodbye. Hey everyone, it's Kel Penn. I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club.
00:28:35
Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible.
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It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
00:28:51
Paramount Plus is now the home of all your BET favorites. What? Yes! With all new episodes of Tyler Perry's Divorce Sisters.
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You've always liked a little drama. Plus a whole new world of movies like Gladiator 2.
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